WEBVTT - Second Date Update: The Situationship

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<v Speaker 1>Second day. How many times have we heard the story?

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<v Speaker 1>I don't think that girl would have ever spoken to me,

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<v Speaker 1>but I had a puppy with me in the park thing.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, I've got fifteen different phone numbers, yeah, checks out. Sure.

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<v Speaker 1>Some were from eighty year olds and a couple of

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<v Speaker 1>fourteen year olds. Still phone numbers. There's a few ones

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<v Speaker 1>who haven't been through menopause quite yet, and those are

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<v Speaker 1>the ones that I want to go out withee. We've

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<v Speaker 1>all heard that story before, Okay, is that not the

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<v Speaker 1>story we're gonna hear today? Well, we haven't heard is

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<v Speaker 1>the girl with the dogs in the park and how

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<v Speaker 1>that leads to a life of romance? I mean it

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<v Speaker 1>works exactly the same dog park. And I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>how I more often? And are you talking to us?

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, I'm so sorry. I was talking to

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<v Speaker 1>somebody else. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I thought

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<v Speaker 1>I would do but I must have did. Not none

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<v Speaker 1>of your drama. You're a good Lisa, You're here, You're

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<v Speaker 1>on the show. Now. Were you talking to your puppy

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<v Speaker 1>and we were, Yes, I was talking to my puppy, coping,

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<v Speaker 1>I was spenting. We were talking about you because Apparently

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<v Speaker 1>dogs were involved in your first date. Is that right? Yes?

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<v Speaker 1>Well dogs are always involved in my life, but yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>specifically my first day as well. Okay, so you're like

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<v Speaker 1>a dog mom. Well yeah, so I'm a dog mom.

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<v Speaker 1>But I'm a dog mom and I love my dog

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<v Speaker 1>so much that I ended up running my own pet business.

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<v Speaker 1>That's all. You have your own business, all that's doing

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<v Speaker 1>good work in the world. Thank you. Is that how

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<v Speaker 1>you met a person you would know with? No? So

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<v Speaker 1>I met him online. Um, he didn't really know like

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<v Speaker 1>what I did necessarily, but he knew that I was

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<v Speaker 1>an animal lover. Okay, And does he have a name? Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>his name is Nathan. Okay. So I was supposed to

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<v Speaker 1>go meet up with him a couple of days ago

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<v Speaker 1>and I was running late, so I was like, let

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<v Speaker 1>me just ask him if he wants to come and

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<v Speaker 1>walk the dogs with me? Oh? Mix in business and pleasure. See,

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<v Speaker 1>do you want to come with me to my work?

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<v Speaker 1>Who doesn't want to walk dogs? Like you're outside, you're

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<v Speaker 1>enjoying the weather, and you're hanging out with it. I

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<v Speaker 1>would love it. That's the only thing I'd probably get

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<v Speaker 1>me on a walk is give me some dogs that

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<v Speaker 1>How did it go. Were you able to have like

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<v Speaker 1>a fun time with him, make it romance? Yeah? It

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<v Speaker 1>was great. We met up, you know, we took the

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<v Speaker 1>dogs around. It was like really really good. And he

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<v Speaker 1>asked me, He's like, do you have your own dog?

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<v Speaker 1>And I said yes, I of course I have my

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<v Speaker 1>own dog. And he says, well, we should walk him too,

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<v Speaker 1>And I told him that his name was Barney. It's

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<v Speaker 1>short for Barnacle actually, because he's kind of old and crusty.

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<v Speaker 1>Did you like run like stop by your apartment or

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<v Speaker 1>something and pick up Barney. Yes. We ended up blocking

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<v Speaker 1>Barney and after we had walked like four different dogs,

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<v Speaker 1>so you know, I was like, this guy is willing

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<v Speaker 1>to walk with me for these my hours. You know.

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<v Speaker 1>It was so and good and the comedies was great,

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<v Speaker 1>and we went to go drop off Barney back at

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<v Speaker 1>home and we kissed on my front door. Are you

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<v Speaker 1>kidd right in front of barney body party? You think

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<v Speaker 1>that's inappropriate on the first date in front of the kids.

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<v Speaker 1>Yet to do it in front of children, Barney trouve.

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<v Speaker 1>I think Barney approved. Did you invite him up or

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<v Speaker 1>did it? Was it the so I invite him up

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<v Speaker 1>and then he ends up spending the night. All right,

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<v Speaker 1>the morning wasn't awkward at all, Like everything was super smooth,

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<v Speaker 1>except the only awkward thing about it was that Barney

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<v Speaker 1>sucked in the body because he always sleeps with me,

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<v Speaker 1>but he didn't think mine. O. Well, I mean he

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<v Speaker 1>knew what he was getting into. He walked dogs with

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<v Speaker 1>you for hours, and I mean you obviously made a

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<v Speaker 1>good connection because it's not even like you guys were drinking.

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<v Speaker 1>It wasn't like some like. It was like it was

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<v Speaker 1>all genuine that all sounds great. So how did you

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<v Speaker 1>two leave it? That day? So he was getting ready

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<v Speaker 1>to go that next morning and I told him, I

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<v Speaker 1>was like, well, I want to be vulnerable with you.

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<v Speaker 1>And I said, I like you and I do them,

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<v Speaker 1>so you know, I don't want to meet anyone else

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<v Speaker 1>new online like I did. But not take it too seriously.

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<v Speaker 1>Is this the talk? I feel like, I feel like

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<v Speaker 1>it's important to you know, like let people know what

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<v Speaker 1>page you're on and for them to let you know

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<v Speaker 1>what page they're on, and that's how things work. So

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<v Speaker 1>I asked this, I said, are you okay if we're

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<v Speaker 1>in a situation ship and a situationship, well, that's like

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<v Speaker 1>you're not quite in a relationship. It can either be

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<v Speaker 1>a new relationship or you know, those people that date

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<v Speaker 1>for ten years would never get married. That's also considered

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<v Speaker 1>a situation, right, like not meeting new people, but like

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<v Speaker 1>not boyfriend girlfriends and just concentrating on each other. Though

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<v Speaker 1>so exactly like you were before. Absolutely not that you

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<v Speaker 1>get in trouble in your calling app, which sucks. That's interesting.

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<v Speaker 1>What did he say? He's seen a little surprised by it,

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<v Speaker 1>but not in a bad way, and he kind of

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<v Speaker 1>laughed and he agreed with it. Oh that's cute. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>and I bet it was refreshing for him, you know.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean I would imagine, like finally someone who is

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<v Speaker 1>like forthright with how they feel what they want. Here's

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<v Speaker 1>my boundaries. Yeah, as a guy, I maybe it could

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<v Speaker 1>have waited a day or two. I mean, if it

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<v Speaker 1>didn't go so well, I don't think that I would

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<v Speaker 1>have brought that up. But like it was just so

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<v Speaker 1>natural and like you guys said, like you weren't drinking,

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<v Speaker 1>we weren't doing anything crazy, So like all the feelings

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<v Speaker 1>that I got from him were very genuine, and I

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<v Speaker 1>was I thought it was a great time. Okay, So

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<v Speaker 1>now you're officially in a situation ship with Nathan who

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<v Speaker 1>won't call you back. Is that what's going on? That's

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<v Speaker 1>kind of how they were, is at the end of

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<v Speaker 1>the situation ship? Well I hope not, because it just started, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>but now you're having trouble keeping the situation ship going.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean there's been like a couple of times where

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<v Speaker 1>I try to reach out to him, you know, like

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<v Speaker 1>try to set up a little date to hang out

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<v Speaker 1>and like nothing too serious, just like a coffee date

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<v Speaker 1>or something. Or I even asked him if you wanted

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<v Speaker 1>to come over and hang out with Barnie again, and

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<v Speaker 1>he's just kind of like, either a we've busy or

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<v Speaker 1>it's definitely a situation that we're in now. But yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>we're gonna try and ship it though. When we called

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<v Speaker 1>Nathan coming up, we're gonna ship you too. After we

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<v Speaker 1>play a song, come back and get your second date update. Second,

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<v Speaker 1>it's weird we talk about so many different dating terms

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<v Speaker 1>on this show, and I haven't heard of the one

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<v Speaker 1>that Brooke and Jose both apparently knew, called situation ship, yes,

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<v Speaker 1>which Brooke is trying to attempt with her husband unsuccessfully

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<v Speaker 1>I don't break up. Yeah, you're not fully exclusive, but

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<v Speaker 1>you're also not actively trying to meet new people. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>and that's what happened on Lisa's date the other day

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<v Speaker 1>with a guy who ended up spending the night after

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<v Speaker 1>they walked dogs together, woke up the next morning and

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<v Speaker 1>she said, will you be in a situation ship with me?

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<v Speaker 1>And he was all on board for it, or so

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<v Speaker 1>we said. At least his actions have been a lot

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<v Speaker 1>different than me because he is not scheduling that second

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<v Speaker 1>meet up. So we're gonna call him and find out

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<v Speaker 1>why he isn't more serious about this situation ship. Not

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<v Speaker 1>too serious. I don't want to be the average amount

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<v Speaker 1>of seriousness that goes into situations, right, Lisa, Right right, okay, okay, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>are you are you feeling nervous about this? Because I mean,

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<v Speaker 1>you obviously really like this guy. I mean, the only

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<v Speaker 1>thing that I'm getting nervous about is maybe I brought

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<v Speaker 1>up like the situation ship a little bit too early. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>maybe we can unscare him off. Yeah. If that is

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<v Speaker 1>the case from a radio station, we're cool. Yeah, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>who knows. Maybe after this callsoever will be considered the

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<v Speaker 1>situation ship Crusaders. Do we have to Ye, I'm putting

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<v Speaker 1>in the petition to change the show name from Brook

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<v Speaker 1>Jeffrey to the Situation Ship Crusaders. I'm gonna deny that motion. Yeah, ok, fine,

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<v Speaker 1>we'll stick with book Jeffrey fin Stoll Nathan to say hello,

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<v Speaker 1>Hey is this Nathan? H Yeah, this is Nathan. Sorry.

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<v Speaker 1>Did we just catch you waken up or something? No,

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<v Speaker 1>just get a lot of calls from numbers I don't have.

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<v Speaker 1>So you're annoyed. We're not a solicitor. Huh. Well yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>don't worry, bro. Yeah, well we we're not not solicitors

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<v Speaker 1>in a way. Yeah, we're soliciting on behalf of one

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<v Speaker 1>of our listeners named Lisa that you went out on

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<v Speaker 1>a date with and are still seeing, not seeing I

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<v Speaker 1>don't think well want to still see? Yeah, I know Lisa,

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<v Speaker 1>we're seeing each other. Okay. So she reached out to

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<v Speaker 1>us for this thing called a second date update. That's

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<v Speaker 1>what we're doing right now, because she's a little bit

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<v Speaker 1>confused about why after your first date there hasn't been

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<v Speaker 1>a second one. She says, you've responded to text, It's

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<v Speaker 1>just like, doesn't seem like you're super stoked to see

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<v Speaker 1>her again. No, I do like Lisa a lot, Like

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<v Speaker 1>she's awesome. Okay, okay, so you I mean, the situation

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<v Speaker 1>ship is on on your side. She told us at

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<v Speaker 1>the end of your first day, you guys set up

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<v Speaker 1>a situation ship, and she told us that she might

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<v Speaker 1>have been worried that she rushed into it. They brought

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<v Speaker 1>it up a little bit too soon. They scared you off.

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<v Speaker 1>Or we told her she may have brought it up

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<v Speaker 1>too soon. But yeah, no, yeah, I mean I think

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<v Speaker 1>situation ships are awesome. Okay, right, yeah, So you aren't

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<v Speaker 1>actively pursuing anyone else and you're concentrating on dating Lisa

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<v Speaker 1>right now. Well I wouldn't exactly say that, but I

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<v Speaker 1>am pursuing Lisa. We are in a situation ship. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>she said that she's been trying to make plans with you,

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<v Speaker 1>but you're always busy or something. Well, I mean, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>I would have gone out with her last week, but

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<v Speaker 1>like she said that she could only do Friday, and

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<v Speaker 1>I was actually kind of already had plans with someone

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<v Speaker 1>a date on Friday. So if you're in a situation ship,

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<v Speaker 1>you don't go out on another date. It's right, isn't

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<v Speaker 1>that how I understand it? YEA, well, no, I mean

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<v Speaker 1>we are in a situation ship. It's like I basically

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<v Speaker 1>can't go out and meet anyone new, but there are

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<v Speaker 1>like a few other girls I've already been seeing in

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<v Speaker 1>chattywas so like that should be okay. You know, I

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<v Speaker 1>think you guys differs. Yeah, you're kind of cheating on

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<v Speaker 1>a situation ship. You can't cheat because it's not relationship

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<v Speaker 1>Like this is on your side, bro, So you're in

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<v Speaker 1>a situationship with Lisa, But what are the other girls? Then?

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<v Speaker 1>You know, I'm actually like in like, there's like four

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<v Speaker 1>four situationships. I mean at the moment, fais at the

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<v Speaker 1>same time is allow. I don't think that's a thing

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<v Speaker 1>unless you talk about an open situation ship. But I

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<v Speaker 1>don't think you have that situation. She just said, like

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<v Speaker 1>you can't go out and meet anyone new, and like

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<v Speaker 1>that we talked about. This is one of those like

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<v Speaker 1>semantic things instead of I mean, do you you haven't

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<v Speaker 1>older about the other four women, so you obviously know

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<v Speaker 1>it would upset her. I mean, for all I know,

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<v Speaker 1>she could be in several other situationship. Okay, that's what

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<v Speaker 1>cheaters always. You don't have to tell them because it's

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<v Speaker 1>a situation ship. Just that. But you can't date like

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<v Speaker 1>five people at the same time and say you're all

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<v Speaker 1>in a situation ship. We're with all of them, we're

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<v Speaker 1>all sounding very confused about it. But Nason seems very

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<v Speaker 1>sure of himself that this is okay. To me, It's like,

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<v Speaker 1>that's the difference between a relationship and a situation ship.

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<v Speaker 1>So you may have a cheat in a relationship, though,

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<v Speaker 1>you're just saying in this situation it's okay, okay, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I mean it's it's actually a pretty great situation because

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<v Speaker 1>I mean I get to like this free path to

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<v Speaker 1>go out and get and I cook up with a

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<v Speaker 1>bunch of other girls and like, you know, no commitment

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<v Speaker 1>to anyway. So you're getting you like Brenda and Sally

0:11:49.240 --> 0:11:52.560
<v Speaker 1>and Ashley and Lisa, and they're all cool with it.

0:11:52.559 --> 0:11:54.240
<v Speaker 1>It's like we just pulled all the names out of

0:11:54.320 --> 0:12:01.440
<v Speaker 1>nineteen fifteen. I'm just saying, why am I not in

0:12:01.440 --> 0:12:06.120
<v Speaker 1>a relationship that sounds great? A situationship? Situations No, that's

0:12:06.160 --> 0:12:08.559
<v Speaker 1>not how it works. That's not how Lisa thinks it works.

0:12:08.559 --> 0:12:13.920
<v Speaker 1>I could guarantee in Focus on one Another serious is

0:12:13.960 --> 0:12:17.960
<v Speaker 1>totally on the same page, Nathan, Yeah, find out that's

0:12:18.040 --> 0:12:19.920
<v Speaker 1>let's ask her, Because Nathan, I need to let you

0:12:20.000 --> 0:12:22.320
<v Speaker 1>know that Lisa is on the other line listening. She

0:12:22.360 --> 0:12:25.560
<v Speaker 1>actually has me this one time. I am listening and

0:12:25.640 --> 0:12:31.880
<v Speaker 1>you're just augusting. We are not an open situationship. I

0:12:31.880 --> 0:12:33.959
<v Speaker 1>don't think that you understand what the definition of a

0:12:34.000 --> 0:12:37.480
<v Speaker 1>situationship is. No, you told me I wasn't supposed to

0:12:37.520 --> 0:12:41.120
<v Speaker 1>meet anyone new, and they have it. That's a good

0:12:41.120 --> 0:12:43.560
<v Speaker 1>situation ship. Remember when I told you that I wanted

0:12:43.559 --> 0:12:46.560
<v Speaker 1>to be vulnerable with you. That also means telling the truth.

0:12:46.600 --> 0:12:48.240
<v Speaker 1>So why didn't you just tell me the truth to

0:12:48.320 --> 0:12:52.760
<v Speaker 1>start it? Oh? I didn't lie, you didn't ask God.

0:12:52.960 --> 0:12:55.800
<v Speaker 1>That is such a red flag, Lisa, anyone who says

0:12:55.679 --> 0:12:58.840
<v Speaker 1>that the truth telling that's more of relationship status. I

0:12:58.880 --> 0:13:02.199
<v Speaker 1>think situation ship isn't unto one hundred percent honesty. Yet.

0:13:02.320 --> 0:13:04.439
<v Speaker 1>I think that's true because you should tell the truth

0:13:04.480 --> 0:13:07.440
<v Speaker 1>to everybody, your friends, your relationships, no matter who it is.

0:13:07.520 --> 0:13:09.600
<v Speaker 1>So I just see a lot of red flags here.

0:13:10.240 --> 0:13:12.920
<v Speaker 1>I did tell the truth. I just told it to

0:13:13.080 --> 0:13:15.640
<v Speaker 1>everyone on the radio, Like I wouldn't have said that

0:13:15.720 --> 0:13:19.679
<v Speaker 1>information if I was trying to hide something like well,

0:13:19.720 --> 0:13:22.480
<v Speaker 1>why didn't you tell me that to start with? Then? Like,

0:13:22.559 --> 0:13:24.080
<v Speaker 1>why did you have to wait for it now? If

0:13:24.080 --> 0:13:25.959
<v Speaker 1>you have nothing to hide, why didn't you just tell

0:13:26.000 --> 0:13:28.640
<v Speaker 1>me when we were seeing each other, when I asked

0:13:28.640 --> 0:13:32.960
<v Speaker 1>you to be in a relationship common knowledge of we're

0:13:32.960 --> 0:13:36.640
<v Speaker 1>going into a situation ship breakdown here. But here's the thing, Like,

0:13:36.679 --> 0:13:40.400
<v Speaker 1>obviously there was a miscommunication here, right, he thought one thing,

0:13:40.520 --> 0:13:43.640
<v Speaker 1>you thought the other. Moving forward, I mean, would you

0:13:43.679 --> 0:13:46.320
<v Speaker 1>be willing to only see Lisa and drop the other

0:13:46.320 --> 0:13:49.080
<v Speaker 1>four situation ships? Or on the other hand, Lisa, would

0:13:49.120 --> 0:13:53.720
<v Speaker 1>you be willing to take on more situation ships for four?

0:13:54.400 --> 0:13:56.760
<v Speaker 1>Maybe you guys can exchange situations. I don't know how

0:13:56.760 --> 0:13:58.960
<v Speaker 1>these work. Lisa just sounds awesome, and it sounds like

0:13:58.960 --> 0:14:03.000
<v Speaker 1>you guys had a real connection. Barnacle, how could you

0:14:03.040 --> 0:14:05.600
<v Speaker 1>do this for Barney? Barney really liked you? And now

0:14:05.640 --> 0:14:09.000
<v Speaker 1>I'm concerned for Barney because I always trust all the

0:14:09.000 --> 0:14:11.320
<v Speaker 1>people that my dog likes, and I don't trust you.

0:14:11.440 --> 0:14:14.280
<v Speaker 1>Right now, Barney, are going to have to have a

0:14:14.320 --> 0:14:18.840
<v Speaker 1>serious conversation. Oh no, no, Barney's old too. We don't

0:14:18.880 --> 0:14:22.280
<v Speaker 1>want to let him down. He might be disillusional. That's

0:14:22.320 --> 0:14:26.400
<v Speaker 1>probably what it is. It's like Barney is partially in

0:14:26.440 --> 0:14:30.560
<v Speaker 1>this situation ship tune. Yeah, yeah, the kids. So maybe

0:14:30.560 --> 0:14:35.000
<v Speaker 1>you should dump Brenda and Sally and Gretel and a

0:14:35.920 --> 0:14:40.480
<v Speaker 1>German fairy tale whoever it is. And maybe would you

0:14:40.520 --> 0:14:44.440
<v Speaker 1>be interested in just a one person situationship with only Lisa.

0:14:44.880 --> 0:14:46.720
<v Speaker 1>I mean, if you're willing to do that, we'll pay

0:14:46.720 --> 0:14:49.480
<v Speaker 1>for another date between you two. Not a relationship, just

0:14:49.600 --> 0:14:53.240
<v Speaker 1>the situation. I just want to date super casual. I

0:14:53.320 --> 0:14:57.080
<v Speaker 1>am keeping it super casual. I'm only dating the people

0:14:57.120 --> 0:15:01.920
<v Speaker 1>I'm in situationships with. Okay, stick into your So you

0:15:01.920 --> 0:15:06.200
<v Speaker 1>are a Polly situation ship person, is what you're saying.

0:15:07.440 --> 0:15:11.480
<v Speaker 1>That is not a term that I acknowledge. You don't

0:15:11.480 --> 0:15:15.800
<v Speaker 1>acknowledge it. It It doesn't exist. Yeah you know what, Ny,

0:15:15.840 --> 0:15:19.000
<v Speaker 1>then I'm just not into it. I really like, I

0:15:19.040 --> 0:15:21.120
<v Speaker 1>just saw a lot of red flags to start with,

0:15:21.160 --> 0:15:23.040
<v Speaker 1>and if you just can't be honest with me up front,

0:15:23.120 --> 0:15:28.280
<v Speaker 1>then I'm just not going to waste my time. I mean, honestly,

0:15:28.320 --> 0:15:32.480
<v Speaker 1>this is really a bummer because I really like hooking

0:15:32.560 --> 0:15:35.320
<v Speaker 1>up with you and everyone else at the same time.

0:15:38.400 --> 0:15:41.040
<v Speaker 1>Jeffrey in the morning, Man, who knew you could have

0:15:41.360 --> 0:15:45.040
<v Speaker 1>four situation ships all going at once. Actually, you could

0:15:45.040 --> 0:15:47.960
<v Speaker 1>probably have even more if you're really your much money

0:15:48.120 --> 0:15:49.600
<v Speaker 1>is I think he's the only one that knew that.

0:15:49.640 --> 0:15:53.200
<v Speaker 1>The other don't know that that's happening. He's like, I'm

0:15:53.240 --> 0:15:55.840
<v Speaker 1>not cheating on anyone, but sleeping with a lot of people.

0:15:56.400 --> 0:15:58.720
<v Speaker 1>There is no cap on the number of situation ships

0:15:58.720 --> 0:16:02.320
<v Speaker 1>you're allowed to have. Apparently it did not work out

0:16:02.320 --> 0:16:04.480
<v Speaker 1>for him, Jeffrey, that's not what you need to have

0:16:04.600 --> 0:16:07.720
<v Speaker 1>three other situation ships to fall back on. Unless they

0:16:07.760 --> 0:16:10.520
<v Speaker 1>heard this segment, I'm just telling this is the golden

0:16:10.720 --> 0:16:13.600
<v Speaker 1>age for guys in the dating time. I'm telling you

0:16:13.600 --> 0:16:16.160
<v Speaker 1>you don't have to do a single thing. As long

0:16:16.200 --> 0:16:18.480
<v Speaker 1>as the girl feels kind of good about the label,

0:16:18.760 --> 0:16:21.040
<v Speaker 1>then you can treat her as badly as you want to,

0:16:21.240 --> 0:16:23.920
<v Speaker 1>never talk to her again, and they'll be cool in

0:16:23.920 --> 0:16:34.320
<v Speaker 1>a way. He's wildly romantic. I guy sucks. Yeah, I

0:16:34.360 --> 0:16:37.240
<v Speaker 1>guess no shock there wasn't a second dated, at least

0:16:37.240 --> 0:16:39.280
<v Speaker 1>not with that girl. Yeah, I'm sure he'll be on

0:16:39.320 --> 0:16:42.920
<v Speaker 1>the show again. Not by choice though. Anyway, If you

0:16:42.960 --> 0:16:45.800
<v Speaker 1>ever want to get a second date update on a relationship,

0:16:45.840 --> 0:16:49.640
<v Speaker 1>a situation ship, a casual encounter, anything, We'll try and

0:16:49.680 --> 0:16:52.000
<v Speaker 1>tackle that for you and call the person who isn't

0:16:52.040 --> 0:16:55.360
<v Speaker 1>calling you back. Broken Jeffrey in the morning,