WEBVTT - I Choose … Presence Over Hustle with Daisy Fuentes

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<v Speaker 1>You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl. Hi, friends,

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<v Speaker 1>welcome back to I Choose Me. This podcast is all

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<v Speaker 1>about the choices we make and how they truly shape

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<v Speaker 1>our lives. Today, I am welcoming a trailblazer, someone who

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<v Speaker 1>didn't just join the entertainment world, she changed it. We

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<v Speaker 1>are talking about the iconic Daisy Fuantes. Daisy didn't just

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<v Speaker 1>find a seat at the table, She built an entirely

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<v Speaker 1>new wing. She became MTV's first Latina vij and the

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<v Speaker 1>first Latina to ever Land a global Revlon contract That

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<v Speaker 1>is historic right there, you guys. Daisy has been her

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<v Speaker 1>entire career choosing boldness and self belief, using her visibility

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<v Speaker 1>not just for success, but for service as well. Now

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<v Speaker 1>here's what I love. In her latest chapter, Miss Flint

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<v Speaker 1>does is choosing health over hustle and presence over pressure.

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<v Speaker 1>She's simplified her life. She's embraced a beautiful, leguan lifestyle

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<v Speaker 1>with her husband, the renowned Richard Marx, and is finding

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<v Speaker 1>pure joy in cooking, learning, and soaking up as many

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<v Speaker 1>sunsets as possible. It is my immense joy to welcome

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<v Speaker 1>Daisy Flints. Daisy Daisy Daisy, what a long and glorious

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<v Speaker 1>career you have forged for yourself.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh who knew? You must have? I really didn't. I

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<v Speaker 2>really didn't know. I was not one of those people

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<v Speaker 2>who kind of had the vision of what I wanted

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<v Speaker 2>to do. I always envied those kids in school who

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<v Speaker 2>knew from a very young age, Oh, I'm going to

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<v Speaker 2>be a teacher, I'm going to be a doctor, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>going to be a law And I never knew what

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<v Speaker 2>I wanted to do. Yeah, I never knew what I

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<v Speaker 2>was good at. And I really think that my career

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<v Speaker 2>truly came to me from pure manifestation. Really, I really think.

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<v Speaker 1>So at what point were you like, this is what

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<v Speaker 1>I want to do. I want to go and get

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<v Speaker 1>it a start model because you started modeling.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but that was also a fluke. I didn't go

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<v Speaker 2>out and search for it. It came to you. It

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<v Speaker 2>came to me. Was My next door neighbor was short

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<v Speaker 2>in a model. One day, her little sister used to

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<v Speaker 2>play with my little sister, and I guess she'd seen

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<v Speaker 2>me around and she came knocking at the door and

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<v Speaker 2>asked my mom if she would allow me to go

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<v Speaker 2>with her. Because two of her models called in sick.

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<v Speaker 2>She was doing a photo shoot. She knew I would

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<v Speaker 2>fit into the clothes and that's how that and I thought, Mommy, please,

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<v Speaker 2>I've gotta go do this. This is what I've been manifying.

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<v Speaker 2>I used to go through the magazines and imagine myself

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<v Speaker 2>in the editorials, literally like without thinking, oh, I want

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<v Speaker 2>to do this one day, I would just think, gosh,

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<v Speaker 2>it must be so great, Like what a great life

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<v Speaker 2>this girl has shows up for work and this is

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<v Speaker 2>her situation. If I were there, I would certainly enjoy it,

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<v Speaker 2>and I would oh and I could also I would

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<v Speaker 2>literally put myself in the page, which is manifestation.

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<v Speaker 1>And I realized that's what I was doing. Absolutely. Wow,

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<v Speaker 1>it worked even back then before it was cool.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, well, listen, that's the thing with manifestation is that

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<v Speaker 2>I truly believe, like I know it's working. It works

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<v Speaker 2>because everything is energy and vibration, So it's working whether

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<v Speaker 2>you believe in it or not, whether you understand it

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<v Speaker 2>or not. It's not about believing it, it's about understanding it.

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<v Speaker 1>You are speaking my language. What's the difference between believing

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<v Speaker 1>and understanding?

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<v Speaker 2>Because I think when you say I believe in it,

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<v Speaker 2>you're also saying it's possible to not believe in it, right,

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<v Speaker 2>it can be. It doesn't matter whether you believe in

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<v Speaker 2>it or not. It's there. It's happening, whether you understand

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<v Speaker 2>it or not.

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<v Speaker 1>So true, right, yes, whether you noticed it or not,

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<v Speaker 1>Like whether you're you pay attention, yes, because it's happening

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<v Speaker 1>all the time.

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<v Speaker 2>The minute you start paying attention, you realize how you're

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<v Speaker 2>manifesting things that you don't want, right even.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, right, I've been there. Yeah. I mean when you

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<v Speaker 1>look back at all that you have accomplished, all of

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<v Speaker 1>the pioneering, all of the firsts that you have had,

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<v Speaker 1>that first contract, that global cosmetic contract, that first VJ

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<v Speaker 1>job at MTV, what do you think?

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<v Speaker 2>I mean?

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<v Speaker 1>Was there a moment you realize I'm not just succeeding

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<v Speaker 1>in this world. I'm actually creating a new landscape for

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<v Speaker 1>other people.

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<v Speaker 2>I didn't realize that until I was told. You know,

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<v Speaker 2>I was genuinely doing what I do. I was living

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<v Speaker 2>my life in two cultures and two languages. And then

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<v Speaker 2>when I started doing that on camera, it was apparently

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<v Speaker 2>a thing that I wasn't aware of, and I was

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<v Speaker 2>just like many of us live like this, in this country.

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<v Speaker 2>Many of us are, you know, two cultures, two languages,

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<v Speaker 2>many many many. It just hadn't been there was no

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<v Speaker 2>one representing.

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<v Speaker 1>Us, I guess.

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<v Speaker 2>And so when it was pointed out to me by

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<v Speaker 2>journalists whenever I was doing interviews, people would be kind

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<v Speaker 2>of like, oh, you know, you're doing this crossover, and

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<v Speaker 2>it was a word that I'd never heard before. So

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<v Speaker 2>that's when I started hearing the word crossover, and I

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<v Speaker 2>started hearing oh you did. You were the first Hispanic woman,

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<v Speaker 2>the first Latina. And then it started kind of and

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<v Speaker 2>I don't think even at that time I clocked the

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<v Speaker 2>importance of it and what it really meant. I just

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<v Speaker 2>thought it was, oh, that's cool. You know, you're young,

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<v Speaker 2>and you don't you're living in the moment. I wasn't

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<v Speaker 2>trying to do anything extraordinary. I was just so happy

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<v Speaker 2>to be given the work and to be thriving. I

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<v Speaker 2>thought it would end. I thought every job I got

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<v Speaker 2>would would be my last while, so I was just

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<v Speaker 2>enjoying it as like this thing, that this opportunity that

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<v Speaker 2>I would get that would end. So I didn't really

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<v Speaker 2>have the time or I wasn't wise enough to really

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<v Speaker 2>take it.

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<v Speaker 1>All in Yes, that's what happens as we get older.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's when you, you know, in hindsight, you start

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<v Speaker 2>looking at the things that you've done. Yeah, I'm sure

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<v Speaker 2>you can relate to this, especially you're living an era

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<v Speaker 2>of yours that is so extraordinary, and you don't you're

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<v Speaker 2>so in it that you don't really have the time

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<v Speaker 2>to see what is going on, what you're creating, what

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<v Speaker 2>you're doing, how people see you, until it's over, until

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<v Speaker 2>you're a little bit older and you're able to look

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<v Speaker 2>back and go, wow, I was I killed it. I

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<v Speaker 2>was a badass.

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<v Speaker 1>Isn't that the best thing about getting older? Yeah? Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>like being able to objectively look back at your life, yes,

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<v Speaker 1>and see all that you've accomplished and all the challenges

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<v Speaker 1>that you've overcome.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Yeah. And also yes, and also look back and go,

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<v Speaker 2>I was so dumb. How could I have thought I

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<v Speaker 2>wasn't cute? Or how could I have thought? How could

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<v Speaker 2>I have been so insecure about this? That and the

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<v Speaker 2>other thing. It's so true.

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<v Speaker 1>I look back at my younger self, I'm like, oh

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<v Speaker 1>my god.

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<v Speaker 2>She's so hot, like so hot, she's killing I look

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<v Speaker 2>at her. I'm like, yes, go on, yes, s killing

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<v Speaker 2>the game and we didn't even know it.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't know it. We didn't even listen. No, we

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<v Speaker 1>took none of that in. We only took the negative

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<v Speaker 1>and self criticism and the self.

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<v Speaker 2>Doubst yes, which I still you know, it still creeps

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<v Speaker 2>in now and I have to catch myself and I

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<v Speaker 2>remind myself, like, stop it, what are you doing? Stop?

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<v Speaker 2>Like you look the best that you're going to look

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<v Speaker 2>from here on, Like you're the youngest that you're we're

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<v Speaker 2>going to be.

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<v Speaker 1>Right now, Today's the day live it up?

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<v Speaker 2>So true.

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<v Speaker 1>What advice would you give someone who feels like the

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<v Speaker 1>thing that they want doesn't exist, for someone that looks

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<v Speaker 1>like them or the thing, or they're waiting for permission

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<v Speaker 1>to step forward into something.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, the waiting for permission is a big one because

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<v Speaker 2>again with age comes the power and the wisdom to

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<v Speaker 2>realize that you're the one that gives yourself permission. You're

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<v Speaker 2>the one, So you have to give yourself permission. You

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<v Speaker 2>have to forgive yourself for mistakes. You have to just

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<v Speaker 2>be okay with it. Like I have this really healthy

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<v Speaker 2>voice in my head right now, where I think a

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<v Speaker 2>lot of people.

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<v Speaker 1>Will have a voice that goes Oh you can't do that.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh oh that's twenty calories. Oh you probably shouldn't take

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<v Speaker 2>that chance. My voice is like, you deserve it. Go

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<v Speaker 2>for it, do it, have the pizza, have another pizza?

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<v Speaker 2>What what? What's the worst I can to happen? Just

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<v Speaker 2>go for it. You deserve it, like you deserve my voice.

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<v Speaker 2>I've trained that annoying voice in my head the negative

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<v Speaker 2>way to now say, you deserve it, whatever.

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<v Speaker 1>You want, You earned it.

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<v Speaker 2>How'd you do that?

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<v Speaker 1>How'd you train it?

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<v Speaker 2>Because I started catching the negativity in it, and I

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<v Speaker 2>started going, who is that bitch talking? Who is that

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<v Speaker 2>nasty bitch in my head? Who is that? So? I

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<v Speaker 2>caught her and I was like you stop, like you

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<v Speaker 2>were going to stop this right now. And every now

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<v Speaker 2>and then it sneaks through. But I've kind of trained

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<v Speaker 2>it to talk to me like I talked to my friends.

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<v Speaker 2>I love hearing.

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<v Speaker 1>I love having this conversation with women from all walks

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<v Speaker 1>of life and different levels of fame and entrepreneurship and business.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, CEOs. We all have the same negative track

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<v Speaker 1>playing in our heads in some way, shape or form

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<v Speaker 1>of course, And it's about learning. It's a practice control it.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a practice, you know, like I used to wear

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<v Speaker 2>somebody get ready to go out, get in front of

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<v Speaker 2>the mirror and be like, oh I must have gained weight.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm so fat, Like this doesn't look right on me,

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<v Speaker 2>and I switched it to oh I just got to

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<v Speaker 2>put something else on that feels more comfortable right now,

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<v Speaker 2>Like I don't even like who cares? Yeah, like, Ohoka,

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<v Speaker 2>it's not me, Like, yeah, maybe I'm a couple of

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<v Speaker 2>pounds heavier now, but who gets not. That's not the thing.

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<v Speaker 2>The thing is like, just put something else on. Look

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<v Speaker 2>at you closet. It's full of stuff that's going to

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<v Speaker 2>look great and feel good.

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<v Speaker 1>Stop the queen of self positive talk.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a practice, Listen. It doesn't work all the time.

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<v Speaker 2>But no, I'm just putting it out there because I

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<v Speaker 2>know that we all have that we all have that

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<v Speaker 2>person in our head, and we can train her to

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<v Speaker 2>be nice. We can train her to be a little nicer.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, oh I love that. It gives me hope and

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<v Speaker 1>possibilities for everyone listening, it's so good. I think it's

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<v Speaker 1>safe to say, at least from an outside perspective, that

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<v Speaker 1>it seems like beauty was your open door it was

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<v Speaker 1>your way in in the very beginning, and I mean

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<v Speaker 1>no shade on that, because you truly defined beauty for

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<v Speaker 1>so many women out there and really paved the way.

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<v Speaker 1>And cut to here we all are. Here, we are,

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<v Speaker 1>all these years later, still in the spotlight, both here,

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<v Speaker 1>still killing it. But the spotlight has changed and aging

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<v Speaker 1>what was once a very bad thing. I feel like

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<v Speaker 1>the tides are turning, maybe you know, and now there's

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<v Speaker 1>a new understanding and a new appreciation for women as

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<v Speaker 1>they get older that maybe wasn't there before.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know if that appreciation is there or we're

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<v Speaker 2>feeling that appreciation for ourselves now because we're talking about

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<v Speaker 2>it more. Yeah, I don't know that the world has

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<v Speaker 2>caught up. I don't know that the world is giving

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<v Speaker 2>us the respect that we need to demand. We're certainly

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<v Speaker 2>looking better than we ever did before. As older women.

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<v Speaker 2>All older women are killing it. They're killing the game

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<v Speaker 2>with like you see a fifty year old when a

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<v Speaker 2>sixty year old and a seventy year old woman, they're

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<v Speaker 2>looking better and younger, not in a way, not in

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<v Speaker 2>cost way, not in like getting a surgery way, right

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<v Speaker 2>in an energy way, like they just feel like you

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<v Speaker 2>used to see a sixty year old woman and I

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<v Speaker 2>would think, oh, she's a granny. Like now a sixty

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<v Speaker 2>year old woman is gorgeous and strong and energetic. And

0:12:32.360 --> 0:12:35.560
<v Speaker 2>I think that that is because of the conversations that

0:12:35.600 --> 0:12:36.080
<v Speaker 2>we're having.

0:12:36.559 --> 0:12:37.319
<v Speaker 1>Do you think it's.

0:12:37.120 --> 0:12:38.959
<v Speaker 2>Because of our perspective? Though?

0:12:39.160 --> 0:12:42.679
<v Speaker 1>Now that we're older, we have a deeper understanding of

0:12:42.960 --> 0:12:47.280
<v Speaker 1>knowing or ability to see how rad I are.

0:12:47.240 --> 0:12:51.000
<v Speaker 2>That Yeah, that you can't really know it until you

0:12:51.040 --> 0:12:53.320
<v Speaker 2>live it. And I think that we're just a group

0:12:53.360 --> 0:12:59.120
<v Speaker 2>of women. Our generation is just a bit tougher, just

0:12:59.160 --> 0:13:02.600
<v Speaker 2>a bit tougher, and we don't care as much as

0:13:02.679 --> 0:13:06.640
<v Speaker 2>I think the previous generations did. We don't mind talking

0:13:06.679 --> 0:13:10.600
<v Speaker 2>about the things, all the things and all the things

0:13:10.600 --> 0:13:12.760
<v Speaker 2>that we can do to make it better. Like we

0:13:12.840 --> 0:13:18.320
<v Speaker 2>refuse to give in, we refuse to not feel great,

0:13:19.280 --> 0:13:22.520
<v Speaker 2>and we're talking about what helps us and how to

0:13:22.559 --> 0:13:27.199
<v Speaker 2>help each other. That is great. What hasn't changed is

0:13:28.000 --> 0:13:31.800
<v Speaker 2>that women are still are still putting each other down.

0:13:32.160 --> 0:13:34.160
<v Speaker 2>You see it on social media, you see it in

0:13:34.200 --> 0:13:37.760
<v Speaker 2>the magazines, you see it in the press. The convert

0:13:37.880 --> 0:13:42.760
<v Speaker 2>that the shame is hard to get rid of. So

0:13:42.880 --> 0:13:45.040
<v Speaker 2>it's really up to us when we have these kinds

0:13:45.040 --> 0:13:47.600
<v Speaker 2>of conversations to remind each other that that's not okay,

0:13:47.640 --> 0:13:49.880
<v Speaker 2>that that still needs to be called out, Like, yeah,

0:13:49.920 --> 0:13:53.600
<v Speaker 2>there are a lot of positive things happening. We've changed

0:13:53.679 --> 0:13:57.200
<v Speaker 2>so much of the game, but we still have to

0:13:57.360 --> 0:14:01.000
<v Speaker 2>change more. I don't understand when who bash each other

0:14:01.280 --> 0:14:02.520
<v Speaker 2>and there's a lot of that going on.

0:14:03.040 --> 0:14:06.360
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, it's hard and it's hard to even imagine.

0:14:06.720 --> 0:14:11.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah that you know that happening these days, especially as

0:14:11.760 --> 0:14:13.880
<v Speaker 1>you get older and you know how hard you've worked

0:14:14.440 --> 0:14:17.280
<v Speaker 1>and you know all the struggles that it's taken to

0:14:17.320 --> 0:14:21.560
<v Speaker 1>get you to this moment, Like you wouldn't you wouldn't

0:14:21.600 --> 0:14:25.160
<v Speaker 1>look at some other woman right and think, you know,

0:14:25.600 --> 0:14:26.560
<v Speaker 1>ugly thoughts about her.

0:14:26.800 --> 0:14:30.400
<v Speaker 2>I think there's still so much insecurity out in the

0:14:30.440 --> 0:14:34.200
<v Speaker 2>world with women that it comes out like comparison culture.

0:14:34.400 --> 0:14:38.520
<v Speaker 2>It comes out in a very negative, bashing kind of way.

0:14:38.800 --> 0:14:42.400
<v Speaker 2>And now at my age, I see the damage that

0:14:42.400 --> 0:14:46.000
<v Speaker 2>it's doing to the younger generation. I see how as

0:14:46.040 --> 0:14:47.720
<v Speaker 2>hard as it was for us when we were young,

0:14:48.120 --> 0:14:52.640
<v Speaker 2>it's so much younger for the younger women. So I

0:14:54.200 --> 0:14:56.880
<v Speaker 2>don't know, I think that talking about it more will

0:14:57.520 --> 0:15:00.680
<v Speaker 2>help some of these women catch their own security is

0:15:00.720 --> 0:15:04.480
<v Speaker 2>coming out as benam you know, but that does need

0:15:04.560 --> 0:15:07.320
<v Speaker 2>to calm down, That needs to be talked about. We

0:15:07.360 --> 0:15:12.720
<v Speaker 2>need more conversations that where we empower each other because

0:15:12.720 --> 0:15:15.720
<v Speaker 2>we really are much more like than we think. Our

0:15:15.760 --> 0:15:19.760
<v Speaker 2>insecurities are the same. You know, it doesn't matter what

0:15:19.840 --> 0:15:24.160
<v Speaker 2>age we are, what generation. They may change the packaging

0:15:24.200 --> 0:15:25.200
<v Speaker 2>on it, but it's all the same.

0:15:26.440 --> 0:15:29.800
<v Speaker 1>It can be a different situation or circumstances, but it's

0:15:29.840 --> 0:15:30.480
<v Speaker 1>always the same.

0:15:30.520 --> 0:15:31.479
<v Speaker 2>It's so relatable.

0:15:31.640 --> 0:15:34.400
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it is. You said once, it's not easy to

0:15:34.600 --> 0:15:37.960
<v Speaker 1>navigate through this second act in life. You've got to

0:15:38.080 --> 0:15:41.000
<v Speaker 1>have thick skin do You've got to be ready. You've

0:15:41.000 --> 0:15:43.200
<v Speaker 1>got to be ready to shed your old skin and

0:15:43.280 --> 0:15:47.080
<v Speaker 1>step into your new role. How have you done that?

0:15:47.760 --> 0:15:51.120
<v Speaker 2>It's not easy, you know, especially those of us who've

0:15:51.120 --> 0:15:57.440
<v Speaker 2>grown up in front of a camera. It's tough to

0:15:57.560 --> 0:16:04.760
<v Speaker 2>see yourself basically evolving into a different person. But I

0:16:04.800 --> 0:16:08.200
<v Speaker 2>think that what helped me is realizing that I've done

0:16:08.200 --> 0:16:10.880
<v Speaker 2>that all my life. I did that from when I

0:16:10.960 --> 0:16:13.240
<v Speaker 2>was a kid to a teenager. When I was a

0:16:13.280 --> 0:16:15.880
<v Speaker 2>teenager to a young woman, from when I was a

0:16:15.920 --> 0:16:18.040
<v Speaker 2>young woman to when I was in my mid thirties,

0:16:18.800 --> 0:16:23.280
<v Speaker 2>I was realizing in all of those eras that I

0:16:23.360 --> 0:16:25.600
<v Speaker 2>let go of another girl, like the girl that I

0:16:25.680 --> 0:16:28.120
<v Speaker 2>used to be is no longer. I didn't look like

0:16:28.160 --> 0:16:30.680
<v Speaker 2>that anymore. I didn't believe some of the things that

0:16:30.760 --> 0:16:33.640
<v Speaker 2>she believed. I didn't act the way she acted anymore.

0:16:34.200 --> 0:16:38.360
<v Speaker 2>This is just getting closer to the last few eras.

0:16:39.080 --> 0:16:41.040
<v Speaker 2>I don't think this is the last era I think

0:16:41.080 --> 0:16:44.800
<v Speaker 2>I have. I think I will continue to evolve. You

0:16:44.880 --> 0:16:47.080
<v Speaker 2>got a few left in you, I think at least

0:16:47.120 --> 0:16:50.080
<v Speaker 2>a couple, you know. But that's what helped me is

0:16:50.120 --> 0:16:55.200
<v Speaker 2>realizing that, oh, I'm this woman now, and all along

0:16:55.240 --> 0:16:58.560
<v Speaker 2>the way they were all pretty cool. They all ended

0:16:58.640 --> 0:17:02.680
<v Speaker 2>up being pretty cool, and I ended up liking all

0:17:02.720 --> 0:17:06.159
<v Speaker 2>of them or being comfortable with all of them. So

0:17:06.960 --> 0:17:10.080
<v Speaker 2>this is going to be the same. And when I

0:17:10.160 --> 0:17:13.159
<v Speaker 2>get into my sixties and my seventies, that's going to

0:17:13.200 --> 0:17:15.600
<v Speaker 2>be a different version of me. And that might be

0:17:15.640 --> 0:17:19.360
<v Speaker 2>really fun too, I don't know. Yeah, the part that's

0:17:19.359 --> 0:17:22.359
<v Speaker 2>not fun is realizing that you're getting older, you know.

0:17:22.880 --> 0:17:26.040
<v Speaker 2>I don't like dealing with looking at myself and being like, oh,

0:17:26.080 --> 0:17:29.280
<v Speaker 2>do I need botox? What is the latest laser treatment

0:17:29.359 --> 0:17:31.840
<v Speaker 2>that I need to have right now? What is the

0:17:31.880 --> 0:17:35.600
<v Speaker 2>next magic potion that you know, I enjoy that and

0:17:35.640 --> 0:17:38.640
<v Speaker 2>I don't because those things don't work as well as.

0:17:38.600 --> 0:17:40.880
<v Speaker 1>They use to as you get older.

0:17:41.000 --> 0:17:43.320
<v Speaker 2>Right, So that part of it is tough, But all

0:17:43.359 --> 0:17:46.199
<v Speaker 2>the other things are there for us to embrace if

0:17:46.240 --> 0:17:46.760
<v Speaker 2>we choose to.

0:17:47.960 --> 0:17:51.399
<v Speaker 1>I mean especially in the industry that we're in, but

0:17:51.520 --> 0:17:54.560
<v Speaker 1>I mean honestly in any industry. As women, we are

0:17:54.600 --> 0:17:58.320
<v Speaker 1>traditionally more valued if we are attractive and young. Let's

0:17:58.400 --> 0:18:03.280
<v Speaker 1>just be honest. Have you learned to choose wholeness over

0:18:03.400 --> 0:18:06.600
<v Speaker 1>that pressure to stay perfect? Like people remember you?

0:18:07.920 --> 0:18:15.400
<v Speaker 2>I think that knowledge, curiosity, kindness is much more important

0:18:16.359 --> 0:18:18.240
<v Speaker 2>because I've met a lot of beautiful people who get

0:18:18.320 --> 0:18:21.399
<v Speaker 2>ugly really fast. I've met a lot of people that

0:18:21.440 --> 0:18:24.679
<v Speaker 2>aren't initially the most gorgeous person in the room, that

0:18:24.800 --> 0:18:28.520
<v Speaker 2>immediately capture everyone's attention, and they are the unforgettable ones.

0:18:29.119 --> 0:18:33.320
<v Speaker 2>So it's really an essence, it's a presence. And so

0:18:33.400 --> 0:18:39.400
<v Speaker 2>that's why it's important for me to stay curious to learn.

0:18:39.720 --> 0:18:43.000
<v Speaker 2>I'm obsessed with learning. I go down every rabbit hole,

0:18:43.080 --> 0:18:47.040
<v Speaker 2>and now with technology like, I am loving it. I

0:18:47.080 --> 0:18:50.240
<v Speaker 2>am loving being able to learn so much about so

0:18:50.280 --> 0:18:53.359
<v Speaker 2>many things on my own. I think that that's what

0:18:53.480 --> 0:18:55.840
<v Speaker 2>ultimately makes someone attractive.

0:18:56.480 --> 0:19:01.879
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, the word curiosity keeps coming up in my world.

0:19:01.880 --> 0:19:04.600
<v Speaker 1>And I've always said I'm so curious about everything, Like

0:19:04.600 --> 0:19:07.359
<v Speaker 1>I've always been a curious little girl, and then I

0:19:07.440 --> 0:19:10.320
<v Speaker 1>was curious all the way through. But now I've just

0:19:10.359 --> 0:19:13.200
<v Speaker 1>returned to this, like I need to know how you've

0:19:13.240 --> 0:19:16.879
<v Speaker 1>done it and what made you tick and where do

0:19:16.880 --> 0:19:19.520
<v Speaker 1>you get this from? You know, I'm just so curious

0:19:19.520 --> 0:19:22.959
<v Speaker 1>about human nature. Yeah, not to mention, you know, I

0:19:23.000 --> 0:19:26.639
<v Speaker 1>will google how do you change your toilet lid?

0:19:26.720 --> 0:19:27.080
<v Speaker 2>Without?

0:19:27.119 --> 0:19:29.199
<v Speaker 1>You know, like I will google anything everything, and I

0:19:29.240 --> 0:19:30.840
<v Speaker 1>want to learn how to do it and do it

0:19:30.840 --> 0:19:34.679
<v Speaker 1>myself before I call someone. Total husband gets very irritated.

0:19:34.720 --> 0:19:38.440
<v Speaker 1>He's like, just call the repair man. I'll pay for it.

0:19:38.520 --> 0:19:40.160
<v Speaker 2>Yes, but I need to know if he's doing it right.

0:19:41.000 --> 0:19:43.239
<v Speaker 1>Or when I have the repair man come over, I

0:19:43.280 --> 0:19:46.840
<v Speaker 1>watch him like a hawk so that I learn what

0:19:46.960 --> 0:19:49.840
<v Speaker 1>he's doing. It's not like rocket science.

0:19:49.680 --> 0:19:52.720
<v Speaker 2>Right, I can do that. Like I feel a little magiverish,

0:19:53.160 --> 0:19:55.239
<v Speaker 2>like I feel like I need to be able to

0:19:55.480 --> 0:19:57.160
<v Speaker 2>rig anything any time.

0:19:57.400 --> 0:20:08.879
<v Speaker 1>It's absolutely was there an inner shift moment for you

0:20:08.960 --> 0:20:11.360
<v Speaker 1>at some point that helped you really move from that

0:20:11.440 --> 0:20:15.840
<v Speaker 1>stigma and that pressure of being in the spotlight. I mean,

0:20:15.880 --> 0:20:18.640
<v Speaker 1>you're still in the spotlight, but back in the day

0:20:19.119 --> 0:20:22.080
<v Speaker 1>for both of us, we were in the spotlight.

0:20:22.600 --> 0:20:23.240
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:20:23.640 --> 0:20:26.480
<v Speaker 1>Was there a point in your evolution. Maybe it was

0:20:26.520 --> 0:20:28.520
<v Speaker 1>in your thirties, Maybe it was in your forties where

0:20:29.040 --> 0:20:33.840
<v Speaker 1>you were like, hmm, I'm not going to be that anymore.

0:20:33.960 --> 0:20:38.200
<v Speaker 1>What that was, Yes, I'm becoming someone else.

0:20:38.880 --> 0:20:40.920
<v Speaker 2>Yes, I think it was in my forties. I don't

0:20:40.960 --> 0:20:44.120
<v Speaker 2>know that there was an exact moment, but I realized

0:20:44.160 --> 0:20:49.320
<v Speaker 2>that I was focusing on different things. It wasn't like

0:20:49.359 --> 0:20:53.359
<v Speaker 2>it hit me kind of like, oh, I'm not, you know,

0:20:53.400 --> 0:20:55.960
<v Speaker 2>the most popular girl, because that was never the most

0:20:55.960 --> 0:21:02.439
<v Speaker 2>interesting thing for me. I never all through my twenties

0:21:02.480 --> 0:21:06.760
<v Speaker 2>and thirties, I wasn't interested in being the most famous girl.

0:21:07.040 --> 0:21:09.760
<v Speaker 2>I was kind of wanted to be the most successful girl,

0:21:09.800 --> 0:21:12.080
<v Speaker 2>like the richest girl. I don't want to be the

0:21:12.080 --> 0:21:15.640
<v Speaker 2>prettiest girl, and I wanted to be the richest girl.

0:21:16.200 --> 0:21:18.479
<v Speaker 2>So I kind of focused on that a little bit more.

0:21:19.160 --> 0:21:22.240
<v Speaker 2>And the truth is, I had a lot of opportunities

0:21:22.240 --> 0:21:24.640
<v Speaker 2>to do things that would have probably made me more

0:21:24.680 --> 0:21:28.600
<v Speaker 2>famous and given me more notoriety, and I didn't do them,

0:21:29.160 --> 0:21:32.600
<v Speaker 2>you know, like for example, I would get offers to

0:21:31.800 --> 0:21:36.920
<v Speaker 2>do Playboy every year, and I remember framing the letters

0:21:37.240 --> 0:21:41.960
<v Speaker 2>from Hugh Hefner and I thought, you know, there's nothing

0:21:42.000 --> 0:21:44.600
<v Speaker 2>wrong with it, Like I would totally do it, but

0:21:44.640 --> 0:21:47.520
<v Speaker 2>I can't do it while my dad's a lot Oh

0:21:47.560 --> 0:21:48.479
<v Speaker 2>my same thoughts.

0:21:48.800 --> 0:21:51.680
<v Speaker 1>Really, I just I could never. I don't want my dad,

0:21:51.760 --> 0:21:54.600
<v Speaker 1>my brothers, the gardening man.

0:21:54.720 --> 0:21:57.240
<v Speaker 2>I don't want to harass my dad. No. Yeah, and

0:21:57.280 --> 0:21:59.080
<v Speaker 2>that would be a lot, It would be a lot.

0:21:59.640 --> 0:22:01.040
<v Speaker 1>You know, some people make it work.

0:22:02.000 --> 0:22:04.440
<v Speaker 2>No, and it's it's fine if you have that family dynamic.

0:22:04.480 --> 0:22:06.119
<v Speaker 2>And I don't think my dad would have been angry

0:22:06.119 --> 0:22:09.240
<v Speaker 2>at me. I think you would have understood. But I know,

0:22:09.600 --> 0:22:15.399
<v Speaker 2>like I know, just because of our culture, I know

0:22:15.440 --> 0:22:17.640
<v Speaker 2>it would have embarrass him. So that was never even

0:22:17.680 --> 0:22:18.119
<v Speaker 2>an option.

0:22:18.640 --> 0:22:19.680
<v Speaker 1>Are you a daddy's girl?

0:22:21.400 --> 0:22:24.000
<v Speaker 2>A little bit? A little bit. I wasn't like super

0:22:24.040 --> 0:22:28.879
<v Speaker 2>daddy's girl, but I was. I think my dad always

0:22:28.880 --> 0:22:32.119
<v Speaker 2>wanted a boy. So I was more of like a

0:22:32.119 --> 0:22:34.600
<v Speaker 2>tomboy with my dad, Like we did things that he

0:22:34.640 --> 0:22:36.200
<v Speaker 2>would probably do if he had a son.

0:22:36.640 --> 0:22:37.320
<v Speaker 1>That sounds fun.

0:22:37.359 --> 0:22:38.160
<v Speaker 2>It was really fun.

0:22:38.359 --> 0:22:42.880
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, Okay, So I love that you didn't just get

0:22:42.920 --> 0:22:47.719
<v Speaker 1>famous and get stuck in that you connected to advocacy

0:22:47.720 --> 0:22:52.960
<v Speaker 1>for women. Yeah, it's very admirable, specifically in Latina representation,

0:22:53.240 --> 0:22:56.600
<v Speaker 1>animal welfare, cancer research. I mean, there's there's many others,

0:22:56.600 --> 0:22:59.120
<v Speaker 1>I'm sure, but I think that there's such a beautiful

0:22:59.160 --> 0:23:04.400
<v Speaker 1>message there, because sometimes choosing yourself is about prioritizing what's

0:23:04.480 --> 0:23:07.960
<v Speaker 1>most important to you in life. Yeah, so even when

0:23:08.040 --> 0:23:11.000
<v Speaker 1>you're choosing to help others, you're actually choosing yourself.

0:23:11.440 --> 0:23:14.200
<v Speaker 2>So yeah, that's really nice way of putting that some.

0:23:14.119 --> 0:23:19.359
<v Speaker 1>Need that within you. You've also always chosen to give back.

0:23:20.040 --> 0:23:22.600
<v Speaker 1>It's been a really important part of your life. What

0:23:22.760 --> 0:23:26.920
<v Speaker 1>originally called you to this kind of service work.

0:23:27.320 --> 0:23:31.120
<v Speaker 2>Well, you know, when you become popular, when you become

0:23:31.119 --> 0:23:34.360
<v Speaker 2>a public persona, you start getting a lot of people

0:23:34.760 --> 0:23:37.600
<v Speaker 2>asking for your help. And that's when I really started

0:23:37.760 --> 0:23:41.320
<v Speaker 2>thinking early on what a privilege it was to have that,

0:23:42.080 --> 0:23:44.439
<v Speaker 2>to have a stage, to have a microphone, to have

0:23:44.480 --> 0:23:47.639
<v Speaker 2>a voice, to speak up for organizations that you believe

0:23:47.720 --> 0:23:51.600
<v Speaker 2>in that could really use the attention. And yes, I

0:23:51.640 --> 0:23:57.119
<v Speaker 2>have always contributed and donated what I could and still

0:23:57.160 --> 0:24:01.720
<v Speaker 2>do to the organizations that I believe in privately, but

0:24:01.840 --> 0:24:05.199
<v Speaker 2>I thought it's a privilege to have this voice to

0:24:05.280 --> 0:24:09.320
<v Speaker 2>let people know. It helps the organizations so much, the

0:24:09.320 --> 0:24:12.840
<v Speaker 2>ones that you believe in, for you to give them

0:24:13.240 --> 0:24:17.600
<v Speaker 2>that voice, that attention that they so desperately need. So

0:24:18.240 --> 0:24:21.320
<v Speaker 2>it was more about just giving back and contributing, because

0:24:21.359 --> 0:24:24.560
<v Speaker 2>sure I could do that privately, I do. And it's

0:24:24.600 --> 0:24:29.560
<v Speaker 2>about having the opportunity to speak up for someone that's

0:24:29.600 --> 0:24:32.320
<v Speaker 2>really special. So I think that that's a privilege that

0:24:32.359 --> 0:24:35.399
<v Speaker 2>we all have, and that's a privilege that frankly, we

0:24:35.480 --> 0:24:37.200
<v Speaker 2>all have now because of social media.

0:24:37.400 --> 0:24:38.160
<v Speaker 1>Every one of us.

0:24:38.280 --> 0:24:42.360
<v Speaker 2>Every one of us has the privilege of saying, oh,

0:24:42.400 --> 0:24:45.720
<v Speaker 2>I found this organization, I went there, I spoke to

0:24:45.760 --> 0:24:49.600
<v Speaker 2>this person, this is what I found out. I think ultimately,

0:24:49.680 --> 0:24:53.000
<v Speaker 2>we all want to help and it's hard to figure

0:24:53.040 --> 0:24:56.639
<v Speaker 2>out who you can trust. So when you hear somebody

0:24:56.680 --> 0:24:59.360
<v Speaker 2>talking about something that they where they've put in the work,

0:24:59.359 --> 0:25:03.640
<v Speaker 2>where they talked with someone, where they learned something, that's

0:25:03.640 --> 0:25:05.480
<v Speaker 2>something that we can all share with each other.

0:25:06.720 --> 0:25:08.920
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I think that that's that one of the best

0:25:08.920 --> 0:25:12.000
<v Speaker 1>parts of social media, Yeah, one of the Yeah, one

0:25:12.000 --> 0:25:15.080
<v Speaker 1>of the best parts. Let's just say that you stand

0:25:15.160 --> 0:25:18.399
<v Speaker 1>up for our communities that aren't always reached, like the

0:25:18.480 --> 0:25:24.960
<v Speaker 1>Latina community specifically facing breast cancer. I'm curious what do

0:25:25.000 --> 0:25:29.720
<v Speaker 1>you think the most urgent conversations in the Latina community

0:25:29.760 --> 0:25:35.160
<v Speaker 1>around breast cancer awareness, early detection, let's say, equitable care.

0:25:36.600 --> 0:25:38.480
<v Speaker 1>What do you think those conversations need to be.

0:25:38.600 --> 0:25:43.600
<v Speaker 2>I think the conversation needs to be still early detection,

0:25:44.160 --> 0:25:49.800
<v Speaker 2>being aware of it, and around shame. It's not your fault.

0:25:50.720 --> 0:25:53.800
<v Speaker 2>I think that that's still happening. That's still important for

0:25:53.880 --> 0:25:56.879
<v Speaker 2>you to feel like you didn't do anything wrong. You know,

0:25:56.920 --> 0:25:59.920
<v Speaker 2>you didn't miss it, you didn't eat wrong, you didn't

0:26:00.119 --> 0:26:03.480
<v Speaker 2>not exercise, you didn't there's still a little bit of

0:26:03.520 --> 0:26:08.240
<v Speaker 2>a stigma. I think around shame with women and breast cancer,

0:26:08.280 --> 0:26:10.960
<v Speaker 2>that maybe it was somehow their fall.

0:26:12.119 --> 0:26:13.800
<v Speaker 1>That's wild.

0:26:14.280 --> 0:26:15.480
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I mean.

0:26:16.800 --> 0:26:21.600
<v Speaker 1>I think with anything with any illness or disease, our

0:26:21.640 --> 0:26:23.040
<v Speaker 1>minds usually go straight.

0:26:22.840 --> 0:26:23.720
<v Speaker 2>To what did I do?

0:26:24.160 --> 0:26:26.679
<v Speaker 1>How did I mess this up? Yes, and look at

0:26:26.680 --> 0:26:28.520
<v Speaker 1>all the people I'm going to upset or disappoint.

0:26:28.760 --> 0:26:31.440
<v Speaker 2>I think that's also a female trait.

0:26:33.240 --> 0:26:34.800
<v Speaker 1>What a fun trait to carry around?

0:26:35.600 --> 0:26:37.919
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, right, it really is.

0:26:38.960 --> 0:26:48.960
<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh, you are in what looks like a

0:26:49.119 --> 0:26:54.520
<v Speaker 1>very happy marriage. Your husband, the remarkable Richard Mars so

0:26:54.640 --> 0:26:58.280
<v Speaker 1>happy to see you so happy in this chapter of

0:26:58.320 --> 0:27:02.560
<v Speaker 1>your life. You've talked talked about simplifying your life. You've

0:27:02.600 --> 0:27:07.360
<v Speaker 1>talked about embracing a median lifestyle and health so that

0:27:07.480 --> 0:27:12.000
<v Speaker 1>you and he can enjoy as many sunsets as possible.

0:27:12.480 --> 0:27:15.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, now that we have more behind us than ahead

0:27:15.600 --> 0:27:15.920
<v Speaker 2>of us.

0:27:16.800 --> 0:27:19.480
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I mean you, how would.

0:27:19.240 --> 0:27:23.040
<v Speaker 2>You You're younger than your husband, right, yeahty nine, he's

0:27:23.080 --> 0:27:23.680
<v Speaker 2>sixty two.

0:27:24.080 --> 0:27:26.600
<v Speaker 1>Because nothing I thought. I don't know why. I thought

0:27:26.600 --> 0:27:29.040
<v Speaker 1>there was a very difference. I've always seen you as younger.

0:27:29.160 --> 0:27:31.080
<v Speaker 1>I don't know why, but you'll always be. I'm one

0:27:31.119 --> 0:27:34.200
<v Speaker 1>of those people that has likesaged me sometimes, I think,

0:27:34.280 --> 0:27:39.520
<v Speaker 1>so this is like the free you know, very people

0:27:39.560 --> 0:27:42.240
<v Speaker 1>are very comfortable around you. People comfortable.

0:27:42.520 --> 0:27:43.120
<v Speaker 2>I like that.

0:27:43.960 --> 0:27:48.680
<v Speaker 1>What helped you choose contentment and presence and health over

0:27:49.400 --> 0:27:53.880
<v Speaker 1>perfectionism and the hustle and you know, I mean, especially

0:27:53.920 --> 0:27:58.400
<v Speaker 1>with all those decades in such a high glamour industry.

0:28:03.119 --> 0:28:08.679
<v Speaker 2>I think part of it maybe is realizing what I

0:28:08.800 --> 0:28:11.159
<v Speaker 2>just said, that I have more sunsets behind me than

0:28:11.160 --> 0:28:14.640
<v Speaker 2>ahead of me, and really figuring out how I want

0:28:14.680 --> 0:28:17.840
<v Speaker 2>to spend my time, which is the most precious thing

0:28:17.880 --> 0:28:22.879
<v Speaker 2>that we have, which is the most valuable thing that

0:28:22.960 --> 0:28:25.960
<v Speaker 2>we have, and we don't get enough of it, especially

0:28:25.960 --> 0:28:28.520
<v Speaker 2>when you meet your person later in life. There's just

0:28:28.560 --> 0:28:31.800
<v Speaker 2>not enough of it. So it's really important to me

0:28:31.880 --> 0:28:33.840
<v Speaker 2>to figure out how I want to spend my time.

0:28:34.480 --> 0:28:37.560
<v Speaker 2>And I want to spend my time doing things that

0:28:37.600 --> 0:28:40.800
<v Speaker 2>make me feel good, being with my family, being with

0:28:40.840 --> 0:28:44.840
<v Speaker 2>my friends, creating a beautiful home, traveling with my husband

0:28:45.120 --> 0:28:48.840
<v Speaker 2>who's still you know, a traveling, touring pop star, and

0:28:48.960 --> 0:28:52.240
<v Speaker 2>I now get to travel with him. Like, how lucky

0:28:52.320 --> 0:28:52.600
<v Speaker 2>am I?

0:28:53.080 --> 0:28:54.360
<v Speaker 1>That sounds amazing, not just.

0:28:54.280 --> 0:28:56.560
<v Speaker 2>That I get to travel with him, but I have

0:28:56.640 --> 0:28:59.120
<v Speaker 2>the energy to travel with him, and I look forward

0:28:59.160 --> 0:29:03.120
<v Speaker 2>to it and we have on the fact that I'm

0:29:03.160 --> 0:29:06.120
<v Speaker 2>aware of that. I don't want to take that for granted.

0:29:07.640 --> 0:29:11.080
<v Speaker 1>Going back to like the pressures that we put on

0:29:11.080 --> 0:29:15.920
<v Speaker 1>ourselves as women, as women in your position, in my position,

0:29:17.400 --> 0:29:21.760
<v Speaker 1>how did you manage that? How did you Because there

0:29:21.840 --> 0:29:23.760
<v Speaker 1>was a long time when I mismanaged it?

0:29:24.840 --> 0:29:25.520
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, me too.

0:29:26.600 --> 0:29:28.880
<v Speaker 1>What did that look like when you mismanaged it?

0:29:29.120 --> 0:29:32.120
<v Speaker 2>I think just feeling like I needed to do things

0:29:32.840 --> 0:29:38.680
<v Speaker 2>the things, and saying a lot of yes to things

0:29:40.840 --> 0:29:44.400
<v Speaker 2>instead of really thinking, like picking and choosing your yes.

0:29:45.600 --> 0:29:51.280
<v Speaker 2>That's important, realizing what your priorities are, the fact that

0:29:51.480 --> 0:29:54.760
<v Speaker 2>the things that you do or things that now you

0:29:54.920 --> 0:29:57.920
<v Speaker 2>choose to do, they're not things that you have to do.

0:29:57.960 --> 0:30:01.080
<v Speaker 2>You don't need the spotlight. You're doing things that make

0:30:01.120 --> 0:30:05.479
<v Speaker 2>you feel good, that provide you and your family a

0:30:05.480 --> 0:30:10.040
<v Speaker 2>little extra security. But we now have that choice. We

0:30:10.160 --> 0:30:14.320
<v Speaker 2>always have a choice. There's always a choice. So picking

0:30:14.320 --> 0:30:18.200
<v Speaker 2>and choosing what aligns with you and with your values

0:30:18.240 --> 0:30:22.520
<v Speaker 2>and where you are at that particular stage of your

0:30:22.560 --> 0:30:28.600
<v Speaker 2>life is definitely always worth considering. Pausing, meditating on it,

0:30:29.080 --> 0:30:33.640
<v Speaker 2>feel it out, and also giving yourself permission to change

0:30:33.640 --> 0:30:35.600
<v Speaker 2>your mind on things like, oh, I thought this was

0:30:35.640 --> 0:30:38.160
<v Speaker 2>going to work. I don't like it, I'm not doing it.

0:30:41.040 --> 0:30:43.400
<v Speaker 1>Did you ever have those moments where you say yes

0:30:43.440 --> 0:30:46.440
<v Speaker 1>to things and then you know, a couple of weeks

0:30:46.520 --> 0:30:48.280
<v Speaker 1>go by and then the thing is there, It's on

0:30:48.320 --> 0:30:50.880
<v Speaker 1>the calendar tomorrow, it's happening. Why did I say.

0:30:50.800 --> 0:30:54.280
<v Speaker 2>Yes to this the time all the time?

0:30:54.400 --> 0:30:55.440
<v Speaker 1>How do you deal with that?

0:30:56.400 --> 0:30:58.120
<v Speaker 2>Do you just have to suck it up and just

0:30:58.480 --> 0:30:59.440
<v Speaker 2>do it?

0:30:59.520 --> 0:30:59.840
<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

0:31:00.080 --> 0:31:03.680
<v Speaker 2>Sometimes you do, because and then I'm always happy that

0:31:03.720 --> 0:31:07.160
<v Speaker 2>I did, Because I always kind of get into the

0:31:07.200 --> 0:31:10.960
<v Speaker 2>mood of whether it's socializing or going out or getting

0:31:11.040 --> 0:31:14.120
<v Speaker 2>dressed or whatever. It always ends up being fine. But

0:31:14.320 --> 0:31:17.160
<v Speaker 2>sometimes I learned my lesson. I'm like, I remember the

0:31:17.200 --> 0:31:19.680
<v Speaker 2>last time that I did that, it wasn't worth it.

0:31:19.760 --> 0:31:21.200
<v Speaker 2>I am not doing it again.

0:31:21.480 --> 0:31:25.200
<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh. If we had that hindsight then.

0:31:25.200 --> 0:31:28.840
<v Speaker 2>But we do. But we do do we know.

0:31:29.880 --> 0:31:32.880
<v Speaker 1>Even in the moment you're saying we have it, yeah,

0:31:32.960 --> 0:31:35.200
<v Speaker 1>I think we now we have Now we have it.

0:31:35.320 --> 0:31:37.880
<v Speaker 2>Now we have We didn't always have it. Yeah, but

0:31:37.920 --> 0:31:41.200
<v Speaker 2>we've lived so much that we've pretty much done everything. Like, right,

0:31:41.520 --> 0:31:44.040
<v Speaker 2>what's anyone going to throw at you that you haven't

0:31:44.040 --> 0:31:47.520
<v Speaker 2>already experienced in one form or another. I mean like.

0:31:47.560 --> 0:31:51.640
<v Speaker 1>Nothing, hopefully nothing everything. I think that there's probably a

0:31:51.640 --> 0:31:53.520
<v Speaker 1>lot of things out there that I haven't done.

0:31:54.160 --> 0:31:57.800
<v Speaker 2>That's because you don't want to do them, since I'm.

0:31:57.680 --> 0:31:59.320
<v Speaker 1>Not putting myself in that position.

0:31:59.560 --> 0:32:01.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yes, there are a lot of things I haven't

0:32:01.640 --> 0:32:03.520
<v Speaker 2>done and I won't do because I don't want to

0:32:03.520 --> 0:32:08.800
<v Speaker 2>do them. But we've experienced so much in our lives

0:32:09.760 --> 0:32:14.440
<v Speaker 2>at this point, at this stage, we know we can

0:32:14.520 --> 0:32:18.040
<v Speaker 2>trust our gut, we can see where something is heading.

0:32:19.600 --> 0:32:21.920
<v Speaker 2>We know what's going to happen when you get to

0:32:22.000 --> 0:32:24.800
<v Speaker 2>the thing with the people. You know it's going to

0:32:24.880 --> 0:32:26.720
<v Speaker 2>be required of you, what's going to be asked of you.

0:32:27.240 --> 0:32:29.240
<v Speaker 1>We know it. We didn't know it then.

0:32:31.360 --> 0:32:34.640
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, we kept hoping for a different outcome. I guess right,

0:32:34.760 --> 0:32:35.040
<v Speaker 2>you know.

0:32:35.120 --> 0:32:38.600
<v Speaker 1>And sometimes it's just survival. Yeah, I've committed to this,

0:32:39.280 --> 0:32:40.120
<v Speaker 1>and that's okay.

0:32:40.160 --> 0:32:42.280
<v Speaker 2>But at least you're going in and knowing what you're

0:32:42.320 --> 0:32:44.600
<v Speaker 2>getting into, like, oh, this is my favorite thing to do,

0:32:44.640 --> 0:32:46.480
<v Speaker 2>but I'm going to feel good doing it and I

0:32:46.520 --> 0:32:47.120
<v Speaker 2>want to do it.

0:32:47.160 --> 0:32:50.360
<v Speaker 1>And also you're probably going to learn something sure, sure

0:32:50.600 --> 0:32:52.320
<v Speaker 1>from anything we have.

0:32:52.640 --> 0:32:55.520
<v Speaker 2>There's a couple that we go out with a lot,

0:32:56.000 --> 0:32:58.960
<v Speaker 2>and every now and then, well we'll make a dinner plan.

0:32:59.000 --> 0:33:01.440
<v Speaker 2>We some of us will show up at dinner and

0:33:01.680 --> 0:33:03.160
<v Speaker 2>we'll all look at each other and be like, oh

0:33:03.160 --> 0:33:04.760
<v Speaker 2>my god, I almost canceled tonight. And they'll be like,

0:33:04.760 --> 0:33:06.480
<v Speaker 2>oh my god, we totally almost canceled tonight. I'm so

0:33:06.520 --> 0:33:08.160
<v Speaker 2>glad we didn't. We can tell you that because we

0:33:08.160 --> 0:33:10.520
<v Speaker 2>feel comfortable with you. But oh, I was hoping you

0:33:10.560 --> 0:33:12.160
<v Speaker 2>would cancel. But then I was going to cancel, and

0:33:12.200 --> 0:33:14.800
<v Speaker 2>I was, And we do that all the time. But

0:33:14.840 --> 0:33:18.160
<v Speaker 2>we really love hanging out with each other, and the

0:33:18.160 --> 0:33:20.120
<v Speaker 2>truth is, we'd all be fine if any one of

0:33:20.200 --> 0:33:22.360
<v Speaker 2>us cancels, but we're like, no, we really want to

0:33:22.360 --> 0:33:24.800
<v Speaker 2>do this. We're not going to get lazy. So it's

0:33:24.840 --> 0:33:29.640
<v Speaker 2>really about acknowledging when you're being lazy, because the truth is,

0:33:29.720 --> 0:33:31.560
<v Speaker 2>we can just sit around and do nothing, but we

0:33:31.600 --> 0:33:34.240
<v Speaker 2>don't want to. We have to push ourselves to do

0:33:34.320 --> 0:33:36.160
<v Speaker 2>some of the things that we know we're going to

0:33:36.240 --> 0:33:37.640
<v Speaker 2>feel good about doing all the.

0:33:37.600 --> 0:33:40.040
<v Speaker 1>Time, right, that are going to bring like new experiences

0:33:40.160 --> 0:33:43.600
<v Speaker 1>or new insights or different perspectives. And you're like, I

0:33:43.640 --> 0:33:46.040
<v Speaker 1>have a tendency to stay home a lot, yes, because

0:33:46.080 --> 0:33:49.000
<v Speaker 1>this isn't a great love being home. It's the best

0:33:49.520 --> 0:33:53.920
<v Speaker 1>I can just be content, right, and it's the best feeling.

0:33:53.960 --> 0:33:58.040
<v Speaker 1>But sometimes I'm like, wait, do I have an issue here, Like, Emma,

0:33:58.280 --> 0:33:59.280
<v Speaker 1>is this agoraphobia?

0:34:00.000 --> 0:34:01.880
<v Speaker 2>Is that what it's called? Yes, I think it's an

0:34:01.960 --> 0:34:04.040
<v Speaker 2>I think it's a balance. Okay, don't you think it's

0:34:04.040 --> 0:34:06.160
<v Speaker 2>a balance, Because yes, we could totally stay home and

0:34:06.160 --> 0:34:09.080
<v Speaker 2>do nothing and that would be fine, and we can

0:34:09.160 --> 0:34:12.160
<v Speaker 2>also push ourselves to do too much of the stuff

0:34:12.160 --> 0:34:14.480
<v Speaker 2>that we don't really need to do, So It's about

0:34:14.560 --> 0:34:21.640
<v Speaker 2>pushing ourselves enough to keep ourselves, you know, energetic, and

0:34:21.719 --> 0:34:25.320
<v Speaker 2>feeling like we are part of the world, and also

0:34:25.600 --> 0:34:28.040
<v Speaker 2>taking the time to do nothing when you need it.

0:34:28.080 --> 0:34:31.000
<v Speaker 2>I think it's an important balance and a difficult one.

0:34:32.160 --> 0:34:33.080
<v Speaker 2>So true.

0:34:33.520 --> 0:34:36.440
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I mean the nervous system and the voice on

0:34:36.560 --> 0:34:38.160
<v Speaker 1>repeat is so so strong.

0:34:38.480 --> 0:34:38.680
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:34:39.520 --> 0:34:43.279
<v Speaker 1>Do you have you know, the craving for those endorphins

0:34:43.320 --> 0:34:45.719
<v Speaker 1>of being that girl, the it girl, the girl that's

0:34:45.840 --> 0:34:49.080
<v Speaker 1>got the flash bulbs going and everybody's wanting her. Did

0:34:49.080 --> 0:34:52.279
<v Speaker 1>you do you look back now and recognize that.

0:34:53.480 --> 0:34:56.680
<v Speaker 2>I look back now and thought I should have enjoyed

0:34:56.680 --> 0:34:59.960
<v Speaker 2>that more, because there is a fun part to that. Yeah,

0:35:00.360 --> 0:35:01.640
<v Speaker 2>I should have enjoyed that more.

0:35:01.719 --> 0:35:02.879
<v Speaker 1>Why weren't you enjoying it?

0:35:03.440 --> 0:35:08.359
<v Speaker 2>I was too self conscious. I was too critical of

0:35:08.400 --> 0:35:12.400
<v Speaker 2>the photos after I would see them. I was trying

0:35:12.480 --> 0:35:17.160
<v Speaker 2>to always wear the perfect thing or always I was

0:35:17.280 --> 0:35:20.400
<v Speaker 2>just thinking too much about all the nonsense, instead of

0:35:20.400 --> 0:35:22.600
<v Speaker 2>being like, oh, how lucky I am I that I

0:35:22.600 --> 0:35:25.960
<v Speaker 2>get to wear like this great dress, look fabulous in it,

0:35:26.040 --> 0:35:28.560
<v Speaker 2>and then people want to take my picture like that's

0:35:28.560 --> 0:35:30.600
<v Speaker 2>so great, It's so fun. If only I could have

0:35:30.640 --> 0:35:31.640
<v Speaker 2>thought of it that simply.

0:35:32.680 --> 0:35:35.360
<v Speaker 1>I don't think the word gratitude.

0:35:34.840 --> 0:35:37.880
<v Speaker 2>Was talked about. It wasn't a big thing. I mean,

0:35:37.920 --> 0:35:41.880
<v Speaker 2>I remember being grateful, feeling lucky. I remember feeling lucky

0:35:41.920 --> 0:35:43.160
<v Speaker 2>to be in the position.

0:35:42.800 --> 0:35:46.240
<v Speaker 1>That I was. Yeah, but I don't there's something different

0:35:46.280 --> 0:35:49.680
<v Speaker 1>between feeling lucky and feeling grateful. I think you're right, Yeah,

0:35:50.120 --> 0:35:52.719
<v Speaker 1>because grateful, it's just you are able to step back

0:35:54.520 --> 0:35:57.080
<v Speaker 1>and really appreciate everything that you've gotten to do. And

0:35:57.120 --> 0:36:01.480
<v Speaker 1>I think again, with age comes that ability.

0:36:02.040 --> 0:36:04.279
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. I think with age we're more aware of living

0:36:04.320 --> 0:36:07.160
<v Speaker 2>in the moment, of being present and acknowledging what's happening

0:36:07.160 --> 0:36:09.759
<v Speaker 2>in that moment. I wasn't able to do that as

0:36:09.840 --> 0:36:12.760
<v Speaker 2>much when I was younger. It was it was so fast.

0:36:12.960 --> 0:36:17.160
<v Speaker 1>You've been a hustler. Yeah, you've been a badass hustler.

0:36:17.880 --> 0:36:19.600
<v Speaker 2>I've been going and going and going.

0:36:19.840 --> 0:36:21.759
<v Speaker 1>And do you feel like at this stage now, with

0:36:21.800 --> 0:36:25.280
<v Speaker 1>your happy marriage and you're you know, began and healthy

0:36:25.400 --> 0:36:29.480
<v Speaker 1>and all these wonderful attributes to this life that the

0:36:29.520 --> 0:36:30.719
<v Speaker 1>stage that you're in.

0:36:33.480 --> 0:36:35.719
<v Speaker 2>I'm definitely anti hustle culture right now.

0:36:35.760 --> 0:36:36.160
<v Speaker 1>You are.

0:36:36.480 --> 0:36:42.000
<v Speaker 2>I am anti hustle everywhere. Oh yeah, it is. I

0:36:42.080 --> 0:36:42.560
<v Speaker 2>feel it.

0:36:42.600 --> 0:36:44.080
<v Speaker 1>I feel it like I feel like I have to

0:36:44.160 --> 0:36:46.920
<v Speaker 1>hustle in order to get to a certain point where

0:36:46.960 --> 0:36:48.080
<v Speaker 1>I won't have to hustle anything.

0:36:48.320 --> 0:36:54.960
<v Speaker 2>So like, for example, the cold plunges. I tried it,

0:36:55.000 --> 0:36:58.160
<v Speaker 2>and then I was like, why in the world would

0:36:58.239 --> 0:36:59.680
<v Speaker 2>I put myself through this?

0:37:00.239 --> 0:37:04.719
<v Speaker 1>Or I can't even imagine. So I was like, no, no,

0:37:04.880 --> 0:37:06.799
<v Speaker 1>I don't care how good that is for me or

0:37:06.800 --> 0:37:09.279
<v Speaker 1>how good you say that is for me. No, I'm

0:37:09.280 --> 0:37:12.440
<v Speaker 1>sure it is really good for you, but I cannot

0:37:12.719 --> 0:37:13.759
<v Speaker 1>do it. I don't want to do it.

0:37:14.000 --> 0:37:15.640
<v Speaker 2>You know how people are saying, you know, you got

0:37:15.640 --> 0:37:17.240
<v Speaker 2>to just got to get out of your comfort zone.

0:37:17.280 --> 0:37:19.239
<v Speaker 2>You've got to push yourself to do the things that

0:37:19.320 --> 0:37:23.359
<v Speaker 2>make you uncomfortable and take challenges. And I'm all, I'm

0:37:23.440 --> 0:37:25.960
<v Speaker 2>all for a challenge, like I enjoy a good challenge

0:37:26.000 --> 0:37:29.360
<v Speaker 2>every now and then. However, I am in the era

0:37:29.840 --> 0:37:32.280
<v Speaker 2>where I am looking to step deeper into my comfort

0:37:32.320 --> 0:37:34.239
<v Speaker 2>zone right now. So do not talk to me about

0:37:34.239 --> 0:37:36.000
<v Speaker 2>getting out of my comfort zone because I've done that

0:37:36.080 --> 0:37:37.319
<v Speaker 2>all my life and my.

0:37:37.360 --> 0:37:42.279
<v Speaker 1>Life that's right, It's time to stay comfortable, damn right.

0:37:42.560 --> 0:37:51.719
<v Speaker 1>I love that. Do you Guys have a lot of

0:37:51.800 --> 0:37:54.920
<v Speaker 1>music going on your house? You like brings you peace?

0:37:54.960 --> 0:37:55.319
<v Speaker 2>What is it?

0:37:55.360 --> 0:37:56.400
<v Speaker 1>What does music do for you?

0:37:57.000 --> 0:38:02.399
<v Speaker 2>It sets the mood, It sets the tone. It's when

0:38:03.200 --> 0:38:06.759
<v Speaker 2>we have the lights on a timer, so at sunset exactly,

0:38:07.040 --> 0:38:10.319
<v Speaker 2>our lights come on and they're dimmed exactly to a

0:38:10.360 --> 0:38:12.839
<v Speaker 2>mood that we like all over the house. So it's

0:38:12.840 --> 0:38:14.799
<v Speaker 2>like this dim light. The minute that that happens, the

0:38:14.880 --> 0:38:17.480
<v Speaker 2>music comes on and rituals say can I make you

0:38:17.560 --> 0:38:21.640
<v Speaker 2>more tini? Like yeah, wow, and we turn our house

0:38:21.680 --> 0:38:24.279
<v Speaker 2>and our space into like let's welcome the night. And

0:38:24.320 --> 0:38:27.560
<v Speaker 2>it just sets the tone. You can delete all the

0:38:27.600 --> 0:38:30.200
<v Speaker 2>nonsense from the day, talk about it a little bit,

0:38:30.239 --> 0:38:33.839
<v Speaker 2>and then just enjoy the night. And the music helps

0:38:33.920 --> 0:38:34.600
<v Speaker 2>us set that tone.

0:38:34.680 --> 0:38:37.840
<v Speaker 1>It really does. I forget about music and it's power.

0:38:37.920 --> 0:38:42.200
<v Speaker 2>Sometimes when I wake up in the morning, I put

0:38:42.239 --> 0:38:47.800
<v Speaker 2>on like a yoga meditation music, which is a certain

0:38:49.520 --> 0:38:54.520
<v Speaker 2>frequency that is for calming and for being alert and

0:38:54.560 --> 0:38:58.239
<v Speaker 2>for relaxation. So it's almost like when you walk into

0:38:58.239 --> 0:39:01.520
<v Speaker 2>a spa. Yes, this this almost subliminal.

0:39:01.800 --> 0:39:03.880
<v Speaker 1>Oh I just felt it. I just put myself in

0:39:03.880 --> 0:39:06.480
<v Speaker 1>a spat thanks. Yeah, So I'm all about that. Like

0:39:06.520 --> 0:39:08.080
<v Speaker 1>I want to have the music, I want to have

0:39:08.120 --> 0:39:10.720
<v Speaker 1>the scent. I want to open all the doors.

0:39:10.800 --> 0:39:14.360
<v Speaker 2>I want to create an environment for myself all the

0:39:14.440 --> 0:39:18.160
<v Speaker 2>time that makes me feel good, you know. And the

0:39:18.200 --> 0:39:19.600
<v Speaker 2>truth is, we've worked.

0:39:19.280 --> 0:39:21.600
<v Speaker 1>So hard to have these nice homes that we have.

0:39:21.719 --> 0:39:25.760
<v Speaker 2>And you know, I can tell that you take pride

0:39:25.840 --> 0:39:28.799
<v Speaker 2>in like creating an ambiance and a home that you

0:39:28.840 --> 0:39:32.520
<v Speaker 2>feel comfortable in. So why not fully treat ourselves to that.

0:39:32.680 --> 0:39:39.080
<v Speaker 2>I'm big on light the candle, do the oil, incense,

0:39:39.280 --> 0:39:44.080
<v Speaker 2>the music, and get the nice robe. And I'm all

0:39:44.120 --> 0:39:44.520
<v Speaker 2>for that.

0:39:44.880 --> 0:39:48.840
<v Speaker 1>Treat yourself home where the heart is deep. I always

0:39:48.920 --> 0:39:51.760
<v Speaker 1>call myself a homemaker. I don't know why. It reminds

0:39:51.800 --> 0:39:52.680
<v Speaker 1>me like Betty Crocker.

0:39:52.880 --> 0:39:54.000
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but you make the home.

0:39:54.160 --> 0:39:56.160
<v Speaker 1>But I am a homemaker and I'm not ashamed to

0:39:56.200 --> 0:39:56.520
<v Speaker 1>say it.

0:39:56.600 --> 0:39:59.480
<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah, but I think most of us are. Most

0:39:59.520 --> 0:40:00.560
<v Speaker 2>women MA make the home.

0:40:01.040 --> 0:40:01.920
<v Speaker 1>We like to nest.

0:40:02.360 --> 0:40:05.920
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, we make we make it pretty, we make it

0:40:05.960 --> 0:40:10.839
<v Speaker 2>comfortable for everybody, make it safe. Yep. And one thing

0:40:10.880 --> 0:40:12.839
<v Speaker 2>I love about Richard is every now and then he'll

0:40:12.880 --> 0:40:14.960
<v Speaker 2>say to me, He'll go, you know what. I know,

0:40:15.000 --> 0:40:17.000
<v Speaker 2>I don't say it enough, but I really appreciate how

0:40:17.040 --> 0:40:20.560
<v Speaker 2>beautiful you've made our home. I'm like, oh my god,

0:40:20.640 --> 0:40:24.080
<v Speaker 2>somebody noticed. That's so nice I'm constantly like wanting to

0:40:24.120 --> 0:40:26.719
<v Speaker 2>do it, mostly for myself, but I really appreciate it

0:40:27.080 --> 0:40:28.359
<v Speaker 2>when other people notice it.

0:40:28.560 --> 0:40:33.400
<v Speaker 1>That's one hundred percent true. Okay, So what would you

0:40:33.440 --> 0:40:37.760
<v Speaker 1>tell young Daisy M to not be so self conscious?

0:40:38.560 --> 0:40:38.840
<v Speaker 2>Yeah?

0:40:39.080 --> 0:40:41.120
<v Speaker 1>Mention that, But what else I would.

0:40:40.960 --> 0:40:43.920
<v Speaker 2>Tell her to be more present? I would say, look

0:40:43.960 --> 0:40:46.839
<v Speaker 2>at your surroundings. Just stop, look at yourself, look at

0:40:46.840 --> 0:40:52.200
<v Speaker 2>where you are, look at what you've done. Stop and

0:40:52.480 --> 0:40:56.200
<v Speaker 2>think about how you feel. Think about what you want

0:40:56.239 --> 0:41:01.000
<v Speaker 2>to do more than what everybody is telling you to do.

0:41:01.600 --> 0:41:03.600
<v Speaker 2>You know, all through my twenties and thirties, I was

0:41:04.480 --> 0:41:10.320
<v Speaker 2>hired talent. I was read the teleprompter and liked this video,

0:41:10.080 --> 0:41:13.919
<v Speaker 2>do that interview, and dress this way where that don't.

0:41:14.040 --> 0:41:17.640
<v Speaker 2>That's too sexy, that's not sexy enough. And I went

0:41:17.719 --> 0:41:21.520
<v Speaker 2>with that flow for so long that when I really

0:41:22.000 --> 0:41:26.200
<v Speaker 2>stopped to think about it, I didn't know what I wanted.

0:41:26.680 --> 0:41:29.560
<v Speaker 2>I didn't know how I wanted to dress. I didn't

0:41:29.680 --> 0:41:33.279
<v Speaker 2>know what my deal breakers were. I didn't know what

0:41:33.320 --> 0:41:37.600
<v Speaker 2>I stood for. I didn't know what I And that

0:41:37.719 --> 0:41:41.880
<v Speaker 2>realization was the beginning of my really coming into my

0:41:41.920 --> 0:41:46.440
<v Speaker 2>own and standing up for myself and thinking about you know,

0:41:46.440 --> 0:41:49.200
<v Speaker 2>who am I? Because people tell you, like, just be yourself.

0:41:49.760 --> 0:41:51.920
<v Speaker 2>My best thing is to be authentic. Just be yourself.

0:41:52.160 --> 0:41:55.920
<v Speaker 2>And you're going around thinking that you're being authentic and

0:41:55.920 --> 0:41:59.200
<v Speaker 2>being yourself, but nobody tells you how to figure out

0:41:59.480 --> 0:42:01.799
<v Speaker 2>who you are are? Like, who are you? So that

0:42:01.880 --> 0:42:04.480
<v Speaker 2>you can be authentic? What are the things you need

0:42:04.520 --> 0:42:05.280
<v Speaker 2>to ask yourself?

0:42:06.280 --> 0:42:06.480
<v Speaker 1>Right?

0:42:07.440 --> 0:42:09.120
<v Speaker 2>What are your deal breakers? What do you like? What

0:42:09.160 --> 0:42:11.480
<v Speaker 2>do you stand for? What won't you stand for anymore?

0:42:11.600 --> 0:42:14.319
<v Speaker 2>What are your boundaries? Like without becoming militant about it,

0:42:14.360 --> 0:42:18.239
<v Speaker 2>but just a realization for yourself so that you can

0:42:18.320 --> 0:42:22.120
<v Speaker 2>lean a little bit more into who you are. How

0:42:22.160 --> 0:42:23.640
<v Speaker 2>can you do that if you don't know who you are?

0:42:23.880 --> 0:42:27.319
<v Speaker 1>It's so wild. I think I can only relate to

0:42:27.360 --> 0:42:30.120
<v Speaker 1>the industry, growing up in the industry, and like you

0:42:30.160 --> 0:42:32.920
<v Speaker 1>and I did, but I feel like we spend so

0:42:33.000 --> 0:42:36.160
<v Speaker 1>much time, you know, being directed, told what to do.

0:42:36.280 --> 0:42:36.560
<v Speaker 2>Yes.

0:42:36.840 --> 0:42:39.200
<v Speaker 1>Then you're all of a sudden, you're out in the world,

0:42:39.520 --> 0:42:41.960
<v Speaker 1>like you said, and you have no idea who you

0:42:42.000 --> 0:42:45.600
<v Speaker 1>are or what you should be doing. And it takes

0:42:45.600 --> 0:42:49.279
<v Speaker 1>a good amount of time to sit with yourself in

0:42:49.360 --> 0:42:51.919
<v Speaker 1>that uncomfortable space of acknowledging the fact that you don't

0:42:51.960 --> 0:42:53.680
<v Speaker 1>know who the hell you are. Yeah, you don't know

0:42:53.680 --> 0:42:56.840
<v Speaker 1>what you want? Yeah, what age do you think that

0:42:56.880 --> 0:42:57.360
<v Speaker 1>happened for you?

0:42:57.680 --> 0:43:02.080
<v Speaker 2>It started happening for me Probably might thirties, because before

0:43:02.120 --> 0:43:04.239
<v Speaker 2>that I was just too busy to even stop to

0:43:04.239 --> 0:43:08.319
<v Speaker 2>think about any of it. I was just going we

0:43:08.400 --> 0:43:10.200
<v Speaker 2>all get caught up in that. I think. I see

0:43:10.200 --> 0:43:12.040
<v Speaker 2>a lot of young women doing it now, and I

0:43:12.080 --> 0:43:15.680
<v Speaker 2>guess that's that's the age where you just you go

0:43:16.000 --> 0:43:19.120
<v Speaker 2>for it and you take advantage of opportunities that come

0:43:19.200 --> 0:43:24.520
<v Speaker 2>your way. You're influenced by your peers, by people who

0:43:24.560 --> 0:43:28.120
<v Speaker 2>you look up to, So that's the time to really

0:43:28.640 --> 0:43:31.399
<v Speaker 2>take it all in and kind of try everything out.

0:43:31.480 --> 0:43:35.160
<v Speaker 2>But it was I wish I'd done it sooner. I

0:43:35.239 --> 0:43:37.640
<v Speaker 2>see a lot of young women I have younger friends

0:43:37.680 --> 0:43:40.520
<v Speaker 2>and love. I think that women in their twenties are

0:43:40.600 --> 0:43:43.160
<v Speaker 2>much more mature these days than they were when I

0:43:43.239 --> 0:43:46.440
<v Speaker 2>was in my twenties, I think rightfully, so. They have

0:43:46.480 --> 0:43:49.480
<v Speaker 2>so much more information. They're able to connect with the

0:43:49.600 --> 0:43:51.440
<v Speaker 2>entire world. I wasn't.

0:43:51.760 --> 0:43:53.960
<v Speaker 1>We're so isolated right in our own heads.

0:43:54.239 --> 0:43:57.000
<v Speaker 2>Yes, So it wasn't really until my thirties that I

0:43:57.040 --> 0:44:00.759
<v Speaker 2>started thinking about, like I would say, things, and then

0:44:00.800 --> 0:44:03.560
<v Speaker 2>I would catch myself going, why do I think that?

0:44:03.800 --> 0:44:06.040
<v Speaker 2>Where did I hear that? Who said it? Oh? So

0:44:06.200 --> 0:44:08.799
<v Speaker 2>and so said it, and it resonated, so it must

0:44:08.800 --> 0:44:11.000
<v Speaker 2>be true. We did a lot of that. We did

0:44:11.040 --> 0:44:13.000
<v Speaker 2>a lot of repeating of the things that we heard

0:44:13.680 --> 0:44:17.839
<v Speaker 2>other people who we thought were smarter saying. And that's

0:44:17.880 --> 0:44:19.920
<v Speaker 2>when I stopped and I was like, I need to

0:44:20.320 --> 0:44:24.680
<v Speaker 2>do my own thinking. Like one of the big things

0:44:24.880 --> 0:44:30.080
<v Speaker 2>was religion. So I was like, I know how I

0:44:30.120 --> 0:44:34.520
<v Speaker 2>was raised when I mean, I lived in New Jersey

0:44:34.600 --> 0:44:36.760
<v Speaker 2>growing up. I was in high school, and I remember

0:44:37.080 --> 0:44:39.560
<v Speaker 2>something that was great was being surrounded by people of

0:44:39.719 --> 0:44:44.439
<v Speaker 2>different different backgrounds. You know, also my friend over here

0:44:44.520 --> 0:44:48.560
<v Speaker 2>is Jewish, my friend is Muslim, this girl is Christian.

0:44:48.920 --> 0:44:52.600
<v Speaker 2>I was raised Catholic. I'd go to their homes and

0:44:52.600 --> 0:44:55.200
<v Speaker 2>there would be different customs and different things, and I

0:44:55.239 --> 0:44:58.600
<v Speaker 2>didn't really understand it. And then I remember going, I

0:44:58.640 --> 0:45:01.000
<v Speaker 2>want to learn about all religions. I want to read

0:45:01.080 --> 0:45:03.960
<v Speaker 2>up on religions because when I talk about it, I

0:45:04.000 --> 0:45:07.479
<v Speaker 2>want to understand it. When I meet someone who comes

0:45:07.480 --> 0:45:10.080
<v Speaker 2>from a different background, I want to have an idea

0:45:10.400 --> 0:45:14.080
<v Speaker 2>of how they were brought up, what they believe, what

0:45:14.120 --> 0:45:17.360
<v Speaker 2>they don't what they stand for, and that was fascinating

0:45:17.360 --> 0:45:19.280
<v Speaker 2>for That was one of the first times that I thought,

0:45:19.880 --> 0:45:22.600
<v Speaker 2>I need to keep learning about everything everything.

0:45:23.000 --> 0:45:25.040
<v Speaker 1>I think we think we know everything about everything at

0:45:25.040 --> 0:45:25.800
<v Speaker 1>a certain age.

0:45:26.360 --> 0:45:28.879
<v Speaker 2>Oh gosh. No, the older that I get, the more

0:45:28.920 --> 0:45:32.279
<v Speaker 2>I realize there's so much I don't know that I

0:45:32.360 --> 0:45:34.719
<v Speaker 2>need to know, like immediately I know.

0:45:35.160 --> 0:45:38.080
<v Speaker 1>And then also the revelation that you have no control

0:45:38.160 --> 0:45:42.040
<v Speaker 1>over anything. Yeah, is such a just like an opener.

0:45:42.960 --> 0:45:46.719
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that helped a little bit, realizing that that you

0:45:46.800 --> 0:45:48.799
<v Speaker 2>have no control. That then you can release a little

0:45:48.840 --> 0:45:51.200
<v Speaker 2>bit of control. Yeah, because it doesn't matter.

0:45:51.480 --> 0:45:55.200
<v Speaker 1>And it's a lot to carry that control. It's very stressful,

0:45:55.520 --> 0:45:59.040
<v Speaker 1>it is, it really is, and it catches up to you.

0:45:59.200 --> 0:46:02.200
<v Speaker 2>And it always trying to creep back in there, doesn't it.

0:46:02.280 --> 0:46:06.200
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Yeah, we want control so badly. What do you

0:46:06.200 --> 0:46:11.000
<v Speaker 1>think people can learn from your journey? Oh, so far,

0:46:11.120 --> 0:46:13.640
<v Speaker 1>your journey so far, My journey so far. I think

0:46:14.080 --> 0:46:20.520
<v Speaker 1>people I would want people to learn to keep open

0:46:20.560 --> 0:46:23.120
<v Speaker 1>to opportunities that may come your way. I think it's

0:46:23.200 --> 0:46:24.879
<v Speaker 1>great to have an idea of what you want your

0:46:24.880 --> 0:46:30.040
<v Speaker 1>life to be, but also stay open to possibilities because

0:46:30.040 --> 0:46:32.239
<v Speaker 1>sometimes the universe has a better plan for you than

0:46:32.280 --> 0:46:39.520
<v Speaker 1>you ever could dream up. Oh I love that. And

0:46:39.520 --> 0:46:42.080
<v Speaker 1>and give yourself permission to change your mind on things.

0:46:42.960 --> 0:46:46.720
<v Speaker 2>You're allowed to change your mind. You're allowed to uh

0:46:46.960 --> 0:46:48.960
<v Speaker 2>not want to do things that you once wanted to do.

0:46:49.520 --> 0:46:52.560
<v Speaker 2>You're allowed to not enjoy some things that you once enjoyed.

0:46:55.239 --> 0:46:58.239
<v Speaker 2>It's important, in fact, change my mind, change my mind

0:46:58.280 --> 0:47:02.319
<v Speaker 2>on things. I welcome people to change my mind, like

0:47:02.400 --> 0:47:08.399
<v Speaker 2>I thrive on that. I think it's it's important. One

0:47:08.440 --> 0:47:17.840
<v Speaker 2>of the things from my journey is to go with it. Like,

0:47:18.120 --> 0:47:21.040
<v Speaker 2>just just go with it. Make the best of the situations.

0:47:22.000 --> 0:47:27.120
<v Speaker 2>You know, whether the opportunity is great or not. If

0:47:27.120 --> 0:47:30.880
<v Speaker 2>you're at a point in your life where just isn't

0:47:31.239 --> 0:47:33.880
<v Speaker 2>what I wanted to do, well, maybe it's leading you

0:47:33.920 --> 0:47:36.439
<v Speaker 2>to what you want to do. So always be really

0:47:36.480 --> 0:47:38.960
<v Speaker 2>good at it. Whatever it is that you're doing, take

0:47:39.000 --> 0:47:41.279
<v Speaker 2>pride in it. Do your best, do your best. Just

0:47:41.320 --> 0:47:45.160
<v Speaker 2>take pride in learning and in doing the best that

0:47:45.200 --> 0:47:48.359
<v Speaker 2>you can at whatever level you're at. I did learn

0:47:48.400 --> 0:47:52.160
<v Speaker 2>that from my grandfather and then from my parents, and

0:47:52.200 --> 0:47:55.600
<v Speaker 2>that was a big thing. Just always always be prideful

0:47:55.640 --> 0:47:57.120
<v Speaker 2>in whatever work you're.

0:47:57.000 --> 0:47:59.600
<v Speaker 1>Doing, and work hard. I feel like you've worked hard.

0:48:00.239 --> 0:48:02.600
<v Speaker 2>I think work ethic is a big thing in my culture.

0:48:02.719 --> 0:48:04.239
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, mine too.

0:48:05.000 --> 0:48:05.280
<v Speaker 2>Well.

0:48:05.480 --> 0:48:07.680
<v Speaker 1>I've loved our conversation so much. But before I let

0:48:07.760 --> 0:48:11.800
<v Speaker 1>you go, I have to ask you, Daisy Fuentes, what

0:48:11.880 --> 0:48:13.560
<v Speaker 1>was your last I Choose me moment?

0:48:16.760 --> 0:48:18.680
<v Speaker 2>I think we I think we talked about it. But

0:48:18.760 --> 0:48:22.400
<v Speaker 2>my last I choose I choose me moment was realizing

0:48:23.480 --> 0:48:27.120
<v Speaker 2>that I want to slow down, that I don't want

0:48:27.480 --> 0:48:29.800
<v Speaker 2>to do what everybody else thinks I should be doing.

0:48:29.920 --> 0:48:33.800
<v Speaker 2>That doesn't feel good to me, like choosing a slow morning.

0:48:35.400 --> 0:48:37.560
<v Speaker 2>You know, I keep hearing these women I wake up

0:48:37.600 --> 0:48:39.680
<v Speaker 2>at five am, by six am, I've done this and

0:48:39.680 --> 0:48:42.840
<v Speaker 2>I've done that, And I start and I start like hyperventilating,

0:48:42.920 --> 0:48:44.600
<v Speaker 2>like my god, I got to wake up at five

0:48:44.600 --> 0:48:46.560
<v Speaker 2>am tomorrow and I've got to do And then I

0:48:46.640 --> 0:48:53.280
<v Speaker 2>remember thinking, going, no, no, I don't want to do that.

0:48:53.280 --> 0:48:55.200
<v Speaker 2>That doesn't feel good to me. You know, it feels

0:48:55.200 --> 0:48:57.000
<v Speaker 2>good to me waking up whenever I want. That's a

0:48:57.080 --> 0:49:00.000
<v Speaker 2>luxury that I have earned at this stage of my life.

0:49:00.120 --> 0:49:00.279
<v Speaker 1>Right.

0:49:00.960 --> 0:49:03.319
<v Speaker 2>Not having to put the along my obviously unless I'm

0:49:03.320 --> 0:49:06.640
<v Speaker 2>traveling or doing something I have to do, but not

0:49:07.120 --> 0:49:10.719
<v Speaker 2>making an appointment for eight or nine am, because I

0:49:10.880 --> 0:49:13.239
<v Speaker 2>like that time. I want to get up. I look

0:49:13.280 --> 0:49:15.880
<v Speaker 2>at my birds. I have bird feeders. Oh my gosh,

0:49:16.400 --> 0:49:19.000
<v Speaker 2>to ride a passage. Oh my god, birds we're up

0:49:19.000 --> 0:49:19.520
<v Speaker 2>that age?

0:49:19.640 --> 0:49:23.560
<v Speaker 1>Where were birds all my life? I know, I'm obsessed

0:49:23.600 --> 0:49:24.160
<v Speaker 1>with my birds.

0:49:24.239 --> 0:49:26.960
<v Speaker 2>I'm obsessed with my birds. And it's so meditative for me.

0:49:27.880 --> 0:49:30.160
<v Speaker 2>It's like they don't need me to have them. Do

0:49:30.160 --> 0:49:32.760
<v Speaker 2>you have that? Nobody got to get it with the camera.

0:49:33.040 --> 0:49:35.320
<v Speaker 1>Merlin you no, no, this the merlin.

0:49:35.360 --> 0:49:36.879
<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah, well you take a picture of the burden

0:49:36.960 --> 0:49:39.399
<v Speaker 2>tells you exactly what it is, or you.

0:49:39.480 --> 0:49:41.560
<v Speaker 1>Just it listens to the bird and it tells you

0:49:41.560 --> 0:49:41.920
<v Speaker 1>what it is.

0:49:42.000 --> 0:49:47.080
<v Speaker 2>Yes, it's oh, we're crazy. No, we're right, We're so

0:49:47.200 --> 0:49:50.520
<v Speaker 2>not crazy, right, I think we're right. I love I

0:49:50.560 --> 0:49:53.799
<v Speaker 2>love having my coffee looking at the window. I like

0:49:53.840 --> 0:49:56.399
<v Speaker 2>doing my breathing. I like sitting by the fire when

0:49:56.400 --> 0:49:58.640
<v Speaker 2>it's cold. I like sitting out in the sun when

0:49:58.640 --> 0:50:02.239
<v Speaker 2>it's warm. I don't want to look at emails. I

0:50:02.360 --> 0:50:04.960
<v Speaker 2>don't want to be rushed. I want to be present

0:50:05.040 --> 0:50:08.040
<v Speaker 2>and have a slow mourning. And that is so.

0:50:08.160 --> 0:50:09.840
<v Speaker 1>Anti what everybody's talking about.

0:50:10.080 --> 0:50:13.120
<v Speaker 2>That is so anti what everybody thinks that we should

0:50:13.160 --> 0:50:15.600
<v Speaker 2>do so. As much as everybody's going on and on

0:50:15.719 --> 0:50:18.880
<v Speaker 2>about how like you need to live a week between

0:50:19.040 --> 0:50:22.480
<v Speaker 2>five am and nine am, I am here to tell

0:50:22.560 --> 0:50:26.359
<v Speaker 2>you that you can choose you and you can have

0:50:26.400 --> 0:50:30.760
<v Speaker 2>a slow morning. I am the president of the Anti

0:50:30.920 --> 0:50:32.480
<v Speaker 2>Hustle Culture Club.

0:50:33.040 --> 0:50:35.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm signing up and I am here for you. I

0:50:35.160 --> 0:50:37.600
<v Speaker 1>need to be in your club. I'm so about the

0:50:37.640 --> 0:50:41.399
<v Speaker 1>hustle right now, yes, and I just it's tiring, and

0:50:41.480 --> 0:50:44.160
<v Speaker 1>you know, I mean, I feel like at my age

0:50:44.200 --> 0:50:47.279
<v Speaker 1>it's time to hustle or it's time to you know,

0:50:47.400 --> 0:50:49.080
<v Speaker 1>be where you are. And I feel like I'm not

0:50:49.840 --> 0:50:53.560
<v Speaker 1>not ready to allow myself, yeah that much, but I

0:50:53.600 --> 0:50:56.279
<v Speaker 1>do feel like I can see for you how you

0:50:56.440 --> 0:51:00.120
<v Speaker 1>have lived this amazing life and you have earned right

0:51:00.160 --> 0:51:01.120
<v Speaker 1>where you are right now.

0:51:01.320 --> 0:51:04.600
<v Speaker 2>So have you, So you know, hustle when you want to,

0:51:04.840 --> 0:51:08.839
<v Speaker 2>and you don't when you don't. That's it. That's a rap.

0:51:10.440 --> 0:51:12.680
<v Speaker 2>Thank you, Daisy, You're awesome.