WEBVTT - Birthday Wishes 0:00:00.680 --> 0:00:05.320 Ka boom. If you thought more hours a day, minutes 0:00:05.360 --> 0:00:08.560 a week was enough, I think again. He's the last 0:00:08.680 --> 0:00:12.200 remnants of the old republic, a sole fashion of fairness. 0:00:12.360 --> 0:00:15.360 He treats crackheads in the ghetto cutter the same as 0:00:15.400 --> 0:00:19.600 the rich pill poppers in the penthouse, to clearinghouse of 0:00:19.600 --> 0:00:23.400 hot takes, break free for something special. The Fifth Hour 0:00:23.560 --> 0:00:29.800 with Ben Maller starts right now swinging a sledge hammer, 0:00:29.840 --> 0:00:32.720 bringing the sledge hammer down, just like Dave Parker, who 0:00:32.720 --> 0:00:34.760 we had on yesterday. It is the Fifth Hour with 0:00:35.000 --> 0:00:37.840 Ben Maller. That's the headline right above the marquis there. 0:00:38.520 --> 0:00:42.040 Because four hours a night are not enough. You've told 0:00:42.040 --> 0:00:43.720 me more and more and more and more and more. 0:00:44.440 --> 0:00:50.200 So now every single day we provide you compelling, marginal commentary, 0:00:50.440 --> 0:00:52.960 eight days a week, and we thank you that have 0:00:53.040 --> 0:00:55.880 come over from the Overnight show. Although I have heard 0:00:55.920 --> 0:00:58.080 from people that have reached out to me who found 0:00:59.120 --> 0:01:03.480 this audio kind intent, who are not not radio show listeners, 0:01:03.480 --> 0:01:05.840 which is odd to me because this is kind of 0:01:05.880 --> 0:01:08.880 just continuation of the radio show. But there are people 0:01:08.920 --> 0:01:10.360 that have found this show, at least a few of 0:01:10.400 --> 0:01:14.080 them less than five who have contacted me who said 0:01:14.080 --> 0:01:17.200 they didn't know about the show, and they now are fans. 0:01:17.200 --> 0:01:19.399 And so I'm glad that you've found us here on 0:01:19.440 --> 0:01:23.960 the podcast format, the power of podcasting. There's no borders 0:01:23.959 --> 0:01:26.600 on podcasting, as you know, and we thank you for 0:01:26.640 --> 0:01:29.720 subscribing and five stars five stars. Don't forget if you 0:01:29.720 --> 0:01:34.199 want to personalized Mallard style monologue or whatever you want 0:01:34.600 --> 0:01:38.119 on cameo dot com. It's not free, but it's it's 0:01:38.160 --> 0:01:41.800 pretty pretty reasonable cameo dot com, Ben Maller. I'm not 0:01:41.840 --> 0:01:43.840 like the Soup Nazi, where I, you know, make my 0:01:44.040 --> 0:01:46.880 entire living off cameo. I don't. It's a little extra 0:01:46.920 --> 0:01:49.680 from now and now and again, but personalized video message 0:01:49.760 --> 0:01:52.880 is available there and yet again here on a Saturday, 0:01:52.960 --> 0:01:58.680 we are joined by David gascon affected dog on in 0:01:58.880 --> 0:02:04.880 the hallways rush for the four five. So he's l 0:02:05.240 --> 0:02:11.120 d dare stop a little little happy anniversary to me. Uh, 0:02:11.480 --> 0:02:14.760 this was a one year to the date. I I 0:02:14.840 --> 0:02:20.119 promptly went online and and ordered a an uncut, uncut 0:02:20.160 --> 0:02:23.400 and uncooked Tom Hawks State to be delivered to the 0:02:23.440 --> 0:02:27.079 Mallard mansion. And yeah, we're one year to the day, 0:02:27.440 --> 0:02:30.160 Ben Mallory, that you have had something in your good 0:02:30.160 --> 0:02:32.760 graces and you have yet to open the presence. So 0:02:32.880 --> 0:02:37.440 you are a piece of shit. As I might say, well, 0:02:37.480 --> 0:02:42.239 I appreciate that your birthday, it's behind well no, no, actually, 0:02:42.360 --> 0:02:45.280 hey Tommy, we're recording this on my birthday. You just 0:02:45.400 --> 0:02:50.560 called me a piece of ship on my birthday, you asshole. 0:02:50.960 --> 0:02:55.200 Do you understand you are so pretentious, snotty and conceited. 0:02:55.240 --> 0:02:58.120 It's all about you. You know, You're just like Doc Mike. 0:02:58.320 --> 0:03:00.519 I had Doc Mike and we did a uh you know, 0:03:00.560 --> 0:03:02.880 a couple of ask docs, and he made it all 0:03:02.919 --> 0:03:09.080 about him. You. You're unbelievable. You are unsavory, manipulated. We 0:03:09.120 --> 0:03:12.000 know you're a social climber and all that, but I 0:03:12.040 --> 0:03:14.280 mean that is that's the first time in my life 0:03:14.320 --> 0:03:17.800 I've been called a piece of ship on my birthday. 0:03:18.960 --> 0:03:21.840 So thank you for that. You checked that box. You 0:03:21.919 --> 0:03:28.480 have checked that box. Gascon outstanding. That's good. My final 0:03:28.680 --> 0:03:30.440 final breath, I'll think, well, one of the things that 0:03:30.480 --> 0:03:32.280 happened in my life that I didn't think what happened? Oh, 0:03:32.320 --> 0:03:34.640 I know a guy who I worked with calling me 0:03:34.680 --> 0:03:37.560 a piece of ship on my birthday that I didn't 0:03:37.600 --> 0:03:43.520 expect to have that happened you colossal Jackass's good Dare 0:03:43.640 --> 0:03:46.600 you you know how much time I spent production wise 0:03:46.640 --> 0:03:51.840 into putting not one, but two videos for you. Oh, 0:03:52.760 --> 0:03:55.080 let me get my violin out. Let me get my 0:03:55.200 --> 0:03:59.880 tiny violin d digital birthday cards that did from other 0:04:00.360 --> 0:04:03.560 We play the smallest violin I can get. I don't 0:04:03.560 --> 0:04:06.360 know what this is. This is a sob stories with this, 0:04:06.480 --> 0:04:08.920 you're telling a sobs Oh I had to edit a 0:04:09.040 --> 0:04:12.560 video together. Oh my god, I was working on a 0:04:12.640 --> 0:04:15.320 day that I do not work, and I was. Let 0:04:15.320 --> 0:04:19.480 me tell you, yes, my heart bleeds for you. Yeah 0:04:19.520 --> 0:04:25.600 it should. I'm shedding tears their crocodile tears, actually thinking 0:04:25.600 --> 0:04:28.640 of heart. I actually learned something fascinating the other day 0:04:28.680 --> 0:04:32.120 about about the heart. Um, you don't have one. You 0:04:32.680 --> 0:04:35.400 you no longer have heart. That you're a heartless bastard 0:04:35.560 --> 0:04:37.479 who just called a guy on his birthday piece of Yet. 0:04:37.640 --> 0:04:42.040 Did you know that that grapefruits can actually help remove 0:04:42.160 --> 0:04:47.479 plaque from your body? Uh? That sounds like something Doc 0:04:47.560 --> 0:04:52.479 Mike would throw out, but it does. Listen. Doc told me, 0:04:52.520 --> 0:04:54.400 if you want to go a little longer in the bedroom, 0:04:54.480 --> 0:04:57.880 just eat macadamia nuts. He told that was a secret 0:04:57.920 --> 0:05:01.479 every after it's not chocolate of macadae, no macadamia nuts 0:05:01.520 --> 0:05:04.360 and uh, which I used to eat those as a kid. 0:05:04.360 --> 0:05:05.760 I don't think he did much for me. But and 0:05:05.800 --> 0:05:09.400 then as a what else is doctor? You know? The 0:05:09.720 --> 0:05:13.920 pineapple fruit smoothie? Yeah? Yeah, Doc told me off the air. 0:05:14.000 --> 0:05:15.880 I talked to him the other day and he said, Ben, 0:05:15.920 --> 0:05:17.640 I'm gonna live to be a hundred and twenty because 0:05:17.680 --> 0:05:22.120 I do the pineapple fruit smoothie. So yeah, yeah, I got. 0:05:22.320 --> 0:05:26.919 He's in his mid seventies stock and uh, he looks 0:05:26.960 --> 0:05:28.720 like he's in his fifties. He's doing pretty well. I 0:05:29.279 --> 0:05:31.680 wouldn't drink my own piss, but he's doing pretty well. 0:05:31.839 --> 0:05:33.920 That's good. That's good for him. And as he's still 0:05:33.920 --> 0:05:37.279 in Chicago. Oh yeah, he's back in Chicago. Yeah. He 0:05:37.279 --> 0:05:42.000 he is as authentic Chicago is deep Dish pizza and 0:05:42.279 --> 0:05:45.360 that Italian beef sandwich to Chicago is famous for. I mean, 0:05:45.360 --> 0:05:49.880 he just he is the walking, talking cliche of Chicago. 0:05:49.920 --> 0:05:53.600 When you hear him talk, he sounds like Doc sounds 0:05:53.640 --> 0:05:57.760 like one of the characters from that old Saturday Night Lives. Yeah, 0:05:57.880 --> 0:06:01.360 imitation of like did with what the country is slowly 0:06:01.400 --> 0:06:04.880 coming back to its normal state. Are you? Uh? Do 0:06:04.920 --> 0:06:07.520 you have a trip to Chicago or Philadelphia or New 0:06:07.600 --> 0:06:10.880 York or Boston on the uh? On the front, there's 0:06:10.920 --> 0:06:15.520 nothing on the agenda as of now, but I will 0:06:15.560 --> 0:06:19.800 likely get to Wisconsin. And when I go to Wisconsin, 0:06:19.800 --> 0:06:22.480 I would likely just fly into Chicago because it's cheaper 0:06:23.320 --> 0:06:26.039 and I'm frugal, and I'll fly into Chicago, spend a 0:06:26.040 --> 0:06:28.000 couple of days in Chicago, and then make the drive 0:06:28.120 --> 0:06:32.760 up to Appleton, Wisconsin and uh, you know, see my 0:06:33.520 --> 0:06:35.920 my younger brother who's lived in Appleton for a number 0:06:35.960 --> 0:06:38.080 of years there, and I think we'll have a Mallard 0:06:38.160 --> 0:06:41.280 brother reunion. So I'll get my brother from the East Coast. 0:06:41.720 --> 0:06:45.640 We'll meet centrally there in Wisconsin. But we have nothing schedules, 0:06:45.640 --> 0:06:48.000 a lot of other things going on, so I'm hoping 0:06:48.080 --> 0:06:53.200 that will happen later this summer, but there's no there's 0:06:53.200 --> 0:06:55.640 no guarantee. Also, I'm supposed to go to Florida for something, 0:06:55.720 --> 0:06:57.240 but I don't know if that's gonna happen either. So 0:06:57.440 --> 0:07:01.560 to relocate i'd be great. It would be the first thing. 0:07:01.680 --> 0:07:03.640 The first thing they'll tell you if you ever make 0:07:03.640 --> 0:07:05.479 it big. Not that you've made a big guest. The 0:07:05.520 --> 0:07:09.800 first thing they tell you, moved to Florida, Right, jeter Man, 0:07:09.840 --> 0:07:12.440 he got caught for like tax evasion because he claimed 0:07:12.480 --> 0:07:14.800 his residency in Florida. Well, the famous story. I have 0:07:14.840 --> 0:07:19.400 a friend whose buddies with Matt Drudge, the political the 0:07:19.400 --> 0:07:22.840 political political guy. And when the Drudge Report hit, Matt 0:07:22.880 --> 0:07:26.200 Drudge was living in Los Angeles and he would put 0:07:26.240 --> 0:07:29.080 the Drudge Report together at a coffee shop in in 0:07:29.160 --> 0:07:34.040 like West Hollywood. And then during the Clinton like Monica 0:07:34.080 --> 0:07:37.880 Lewinsky days, this became this huge deal and he started 0:07:37.880 --> 0:07:40.760 making just a ton of money. And the first thing 0:07:40.800 --> 0:07:43.800 they told him, as the story was passed on second 0:07:43.840 --> 0:07:46.680 hand to me, moved to Florida. If you want to 0:07:46.760 --> 0:07:48.800 keep that money, moved to Florida. You can't keep that 0:07:48.840 --> 0:07:51.640 money from California. And it's even worse now, I mean, 0:07:51.640 --> 0:07:53.840 think about but it's not just California, but it's pretty 0:07:53.920 --> 0:07:56.600 much anywhere that has the you know, New York, the 0:07:56.640 --> 0:07:59.080 same way they tell you to move to Florida, New Jersey. Yeah, 0:07:59.240 --> 0:08:02.080 And after a couple of days ago, with the joint 0:08:02.120 --> 0:08:05.440 addressed to the Congress, I'm meant too, I'm done too, 0:08:05.520 --> 0:08:08.280 comfortable with where our our country is going in terms 0:08:08.360 --> 0:08:11.960 of taxes. What was that old saying no taxation without 0:08:12.080 --> 0:08:17.240 what representation? We don't have any kind of representation here 0:08:17.400 --> 0:08:20.960 in California right now. It's like take take, takee, takee, take, 0:08:21.560 --> 0:08:24.600 and don't fucking mind me. Like so, Ronald Reagan. When 0:08:24.600 --> 0:08:26.560 I was a kid, it was, you know, trickled down 0:08:26.560 --> 0:08:29.560 economics always a big thing. So what what is the Biden? 0:08:29.600 --> 0:08:31.680 You start in the middle and then explode. Is that 0:08:31.680 --> 0:08:33.760 what he's planning or at the bottom, and you know, 0:08:33.840 --> 0:08:36.679 shoot it up and don't forget. When you die, then 0:08:36.760 --> 0:08:38.760 your ass is gonna get a taxed too, with the 0:08:38.760 --> 0:08:42.760 death tax, multiple death taxes. So well that's why not 0:08:42.920 --> 0:08:45.240 that I would say, you know this, it's nothing illegal. 0:08:45.280 --> 0:08:48.360 But if you start a trust, yes that's the move 0:08:48.440 --> 0:08:49.920 there if you actually have any money. If you don't 0:08:49.960 --> 0:08:51.400 have any money, who cares. But if you can start 0:08:51.400 --> 0:08:53.720 a family trust, and you know what I get everyone 0:08:53.720 --> 0:08:55.960 else we uhould goof on trust fund babies and things 0:08:55.960 --> 0:08:57.120 like that. When I was a kid, oh you're a 0:08:57.120 --> 0:08:59.240 trust fund baby. But now I was an adult, I'm like, 0:08:59.320 --> 0:09:02.360 whoa that the way to go, right, because you want actually, 0:09:02.720 --> 0:09:06.600 if you, you work your life, maybe you're lucky enough 0:09:06.640 --> 0:09:08.240 to save a few bucks before you check out. You 0:09:08.280 --> 0:09:10.120 want to pass that on to the next generation, or 0:09:10.160 --> 0:09:13.200 give it to charity, whatever. But and they don't. The 0:09:13.240 --> 0:09:15.760 government comes in there and just like a battering ram 0:09:15.800 --> 0:09:18.240 and they take it. But if you have a trust, 0:09:19.080 --> 0:09:21.199 you can keep that money and pass that on to 0:09:21.280 --> 0:09:23.360 somebody else. That's the way to get and people forget 0:09:23.640 --> 0:09:27.560 O J. Simpson. He was found not guilty in his 0:09:27.679 --> 0:09:31.920 criminal trial, but he was found guilty in the civil suit. Well, 0:09:31.920 --> 0:09:35.120 the Goldman's have had a horrible time trying to collect 0:09:35.160 --> 0:09:37.760 on that money. The reason why is because all that 0:09:37.800 --> 0:09:40.640 money is protected in his real estate and his trust 0:09:41.080 --> 0:09:45.720 in Florida. Yeah, and o J is making um I 0:09:45.720 --> 0:09:47.600 was gonna say a killing, but that would be inappropriate. 0:09:47.640 --> 0:09:51.480 But he's he's doing very he's doing very well. He's 0:09:51.480 --> 0:09:54.199 got the NFL pension, the football pension, which is not great, 0:09:54.320 --> 0:09:56.560 but then all the real estate that he made doing 0:09:56.600 --> 0:10:00.160 those commercials back back in the day, for sure, And 0:10:00.160 --> 0:10:03.000 all of a sudden he's on social media defending police officers, 0:10:03.080 --> 0:10:04.920 like what kind of fucked up world do we live? 0:10:07.120 --> 0:10:10.920 Double double homicide? Well he should really O J b 0:10:11.720 --> 0:10:15.960 be supporting bad prosecutors is what he gparting, because that's 0:10:16.040 --> 0:10:19.079 the most important part of that whole o J dynamic 0:10:19.679 --> 0:10:23.080 shoddy prosecution, which is why o J while we're doing 0:10:23.120 --> 0:10:27.520 this podcast, is playing golf. Okay, So it's I am 0:10:27.640 --> 0:10:30.000 good because you get people all right now they're sending 0:10:30.120 --> 0:10:33.120 fund the police. I am good if you defunded the police, 0:10:33.800 --> 0:10:37.000 just as long as you defunded the Department of Justice. 0:10:38.240 --> 0:10:41.920 It just feels like the Department of Justice runs rough 0:10:41.960 --> 0:10:45.160 shot over whoever the funk they want, and it's not 0:10:45.280 --> 0:10:48.520 blind at all. It is just one way or the other. 0:10:49.240 --> 0:10:51.920 God forbid. I'm kind of curious to see what's gonna 0:10:51.920 --> 0:10:54.439 happen with really Giuliani. And this is the same dude 0:10:54.440 --> 0:10:56.840 that took down the mafia back in the day, and 0:10:56.880 --> 0:10:59.520 you have the FEDS rating his apartment in New York 0:10:59.600 --> 0:11:02.240 just a couple days ago. Yeah, well, you know that 0:11:02.360 --> 0:11:05.839 famous the scales of justice, right, justice is blind, which 0:11:05.840 --> 0:11:08.120 you referred to. If you were to update that, you 0:11:08.160 --> 0:11:12.920 would have instead of a blindfold, you would have binoculars 0:11:13.040 --> 0:11:20.120 instead of the blindfold, one color, one color. Unbelievable. A 0:11:20.200 --> 0:11:23.800 chance to watch the joint address to Congress a couple 0:11:23.840 --> 0:11:26.120 of days ago. You know, I did not, actually I 0:11:26.120 --> 0:11:29.240 I'm not a I don't think Joe Biden is a 0:11:29.320 --> 0:11:31.280 very compelling speaker. I should have actually watched it, but 0:11:31.320 --> 0:11:33.079 I was doing something else that night, so I did 0:11:33.080 --> 0:11:35.920 not check it out. I did I did see some clips. 0:11:36.280 --> 0:11:40.240 I did see some clips that of course, the clips 0:11:40.280 --> 0:11:42.960 are the most polarizing things, and so that that of 0:11:43.000 --> 0:11:45.400 course upset me, as you would imagine. So, but it 0:11:45.559 --> 0:11:48.520 plays right into your show because you've had and I 0:11:48.559 --> 0:11:50.520 forget who it was, but you've had a couple of 0:11:50.559 --> 0:11:53.640 athletes that have had just the greatest sound bites because 0:11:53.640 --> 0:11:57.000 it's nothing but cliche. Oh yeah, well Scott Pott, Sidnik, 0:11:57.080 --> 0:12:00.480 the king of cliches, the gold standard. Just take it 0:12:00.559 --> 0:12:02.120 one game at a time, you know, and all and 0:12:02.240 --> 0:12:04.720 he just went on and on. He did like sixteen 0:12:04.800 --> 0:12:07.400 or seventeen in a row, rattat tat. Yeah. I think 0:12:07.440 --> 0:12:10.480 I think President Biden had a great night of platitudes. 0:12:10.760 --> 0:12:13.360 I thought it was fun filled with platitudes. I just 0:12:13.400 --> 0:12:15.719 felt like I needed to hug somebody. I feel like 0:12:15.760 --> 0:12:18.320 I needed to hug somebody, just close and hold them tight. 0:12:18.360 --> 0:12:21.120 While Joe Biden was given US a joint address to 0:12:21.120 --> 0:12:23.600 the Congress, not the State of the Union, but a 0:12:23.720 --> 0:12:26.080 joint address to the Congress. I thought it was fun, 0:12:26.120 --> 0:12:29.559 filled with platitudes. Yeah, it's very similar the State of 0:12:29.600 --> 0:12:33.800 the Union addresses too, like the the NFL draft which 0:12:33.840 --> 0:12:36.000 is going on this weekend. Right, there's a language, there's 0:12:36.000 --> 0:12:41.560 a lexicon. Yeah, like you make a few of those 0:12:41.600 --> 0:12:45.840 together and you know the jargon. And once you know 0:12:46.000 --> 0:12:49.360 the jargon, you can I could sound like a president 0:12:49.400 --> 0:12:52.000 if you gave me, you know, thirty forty minutes to 0:12:52.000 --> 0:12:55.280 write a speech as the president in the native tongue 0:12:55.480 --> 0:12:58.880 as a president, I could give you a presidential ease 0:12:59.440 --> 0:13:03.199 type type speech. You know the language and the words, 0:13:03.280 --> 0:13:05.959 and you know, we want to bring everyone together right now, 0:13:06.040 --> 0:13:08.120 Biden went off script because normally you never say we 0:13:08.160 --> 0:13:12.320 want to raise taxes, so that that was, that was 0:13:13.160 --> 0:13:16.720 a lone wolf situation. Normally would not not do that. 0:13:16.760 --> 0:13:19.640 We can't we can't build back better. We have to 0:13:19.920 --> 0:13:22.480 build back better. It was exactly what he said last 0:13:22.559 --> 0:13:25.760 night too. That was that jumped out to me too 0:13:25.920 --> 0:13:28.000 last night. I thought that was actually a few days ago. Yeah, 0:13:28.040 --> 0:13:30.400 well yeah, I mean it's fresh my mind. So interesting. 0:13:30.440 --> 0:13:32.480 But the power of social media. It's front and center, 0:13:32.679 --> 0:13:35.600 you have you have that, And then you had Twitter 0:13:35.720 --> 0:13:40.400 trending with Tim Scott calling him uncle him, you know, 0:13:40.640 --> 0:13:43.800 like God forbid, you know, like Lebron James and social 0:13:43.880 --> 0:13:47.400 media account is safe taking a shot at an officer. 0:13:47.720 --> 0:13:51.439 He's fine people calling out Tim Scott. He's good to go. 0:13:51.600 --> 0:13:54.480 But yeah, you know, if it's one way, it's okay. 0:13:54.480 --> 0:13:56.520 If it's the other way, not so much. It's a 0:13:57.160 --> 0:13:59.920 it's a wild world that we're in. The great thing. 0:14:00.120 --> 0:14:01.599 They have no shame in their game. The people that 0:14:01.679 --> 0:14:04.440 are on Twitter, they're like, no, no, this they always have. 0:14:04.640 --> 0:14:08.160 There's always an excuse they always Well, all since Lebron 0:14:08.280 --> 0:14:12.240 deleted the tweet where he docks the police officer and 0:14:12.360 --> 0:14:15.760 threatened him, was really nothing we can do, so not 0:14:16.000 --> 0:14:18.160 so I guess Trump should have just deleted. President Trump 0:14:18.240 --> 0:14:19.880 should have just deleted all of his tweets, and then 0:14:19.960 --> 0:14:21.880 right after he sent him like five minutes later. So, well, 0:14:21.960 --> 0:14:23.400 you know, there's one thing you can do. It's not 0:14:23.440 --> 0:14:26.160 on our platform anymore. Yeah, he's not apologetic though, he's 0:14:26.200 --> 0:14:29.960 not abashed. Yeah. Well, how about our guy Leo Terrell, 0:14:30.080 --> 0:14:32.600 friend of the podcast The Great Leo Terrell throwing some 0:14:32.680 --> 0:14:35.760 haymakers at Lebron. I love that. I had a smile there. 0:14:36.320 --> 0:14:39.280 Leo too, if he missed it. He revealed that a 0:14:39.800 --> 0:14:43.040 black police officer wanted to meet with Lebron about his 0:14:43.200 --> 0:14:48.160 issues with the police, and Lebron check in it. No no, no, 0:14:48.160 --> 0:14:50.480 no no no. So I guess Lebron doesn't really want 0:14:50.560 --> 0:14:53.560 checks and balances. Uh, he just wants to to lob 0:14:53.600 --> 0:14:57.320 molotov cocktails and stand off on the side and not 0:14:57.480 --> 0:14:59.400 to be part of the solution, you know. I mean, 0:14:59.440 --> 0:15:03.240 it's easier to go that route because you're protected, you're insulated, 0:15:03.880 --> 0:15:06.760 and you could run as wild as you want and 0:15:06.800 --> 0:15:09.320 no one's gonna hold you accountable. It's just that's how 0:15:09.760 --> 0:15:12.480 with a good conversation last week with Ryan Leaf, and 0:15:12.520 --> 0:15:14.840 we talked about that with Kaepernick, like, yeah, you could 0:15:14.840 --> 0:15:17.160 have one message, but all of a sudden gets deluded 0:15:17.160 --> 0:15:19.160 when you start throwing other shit out there because you 0:15:19.200 --> 0:15:21.800 go off the track. Be sure to catch live editions 0:15:21.800 --> 0:15:24.440 of The Ben Maller Show weekdays at two am Eastern 0:15:24.520 --> 0:15:27.480 eleven pm Pacific. Be sure to catch live editions of 0:15:27.520 --> 0:15:30.520 The Ben Maller Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven 0:15:30.520 --> 0:15:34.040 PM Pacific on Fox Sports Radio and the I Heart 0:15:34.160 --> 0:15:37.640 Radio app. Yeah, there's no, there's no question but that 0:15:37.640 --> 0:15:42.400 that Lebron thing. Yeah. Combine that with his fight for 0:15:42.440 --> 0:15:45.080 the you know, the people make everything better, you know, 0:15:45.120 --> 0:15:47.400 for the lower you know man, and then in China 0:15:48.400 --> 0:15:51.480 where he's like totally in bed with the Chinese government. 0:15:51.480 --> 0:15:56.400 It's it's fascinating, totally out hypocritical. But speaking of being 0:15:56.400 --> 0:15:59.640 in bed, I I forgot to tell you this. Uh, 0:15:59.760 --> 0:16:03.160 the the day you realize I had to stay up 0:16:03.200 --> 0:16:05.880 an extra two hours to put together your birthday videos, 0:16:06.440 --> 0:16:11.720 your digital birthday cards. I expected some thank yous. I 0:16:11.720 --> 0:16:15.320 expected probably a call to say I appreciate it. Um, 0:16:15.360 --> 0:16:16.840 you know, like I was there for you when you're 0:16:16.840 --> 0:16:18.640 in the hospital. I was there when you burned your 0:16:18.680 --> 0:16:21.640 mouth last season. You didn't come to the hush. You 0:16:21.680 --> 0:16:25.480 never visited me in the hospital for your birthday. I 0:16:25.520 --> 0:16:27.200 was in the You never showed up to the hospital. 0:16:27.280 --> 0:16:29.360 I did. I've been in the hospital a couple of 0:16:29.360 --> 0:16:31.840 times since I've met you, and you didn't show up 0:16:31.840 --> 0:16:35.600 either time. Well I was I thought about it. Yeah, 0:16:35.760 --> 0:16:38.920 you thought, okay, Well that's that's like my dad. My dad. 0:16:38.920 --> 0:16:41.120 I he never visited me in the hospital. I was 0:16:41.120 --> 0:16:43.920 in that surgery, the gallbladder, and uh he told me, well, 0:16:43.960 --> 0:16:47.680 I don't really like those places, like, well, I don't either. 0:16:50.280 --> 0:16:52.920 So the COVID thing was perfect for my dad because no, like, 0:16:53.120 --> 0:16:54.400 if I would go to the hospital, I was like, well, 0:16:54.400 --> 0:16:56.040 I can't visit you know, I'd like to visit you, 0:16:56.160 --> 0:16:58.560 but I can't, you know, because of the COVID things. 0:16:58.600 --> 0:17:00.720 So that's true. That is all right. So I got 0:17:00.800 --> 0:17:02.080 a I got a couple of things that you have 0:17:02.080 --> 0:17:06.600 something else. Stay with Dave Parker. Yeah, I mean, I 0:17:07.000 --> 0:17:09.760 know you have your nicknames, but Cobra is up there. 0:17:09.880 --> 0:17:13.520 And the best part is the way that he taught us. 0:17:14.840 --> 0:17:17.840 His ship never stank, it sounded like and he was 0:17:17.880 --> 0:17:21.240 just a fucking ball player, which I love. Oh yeah, 0:17:21.280 --> 0:17:23.399 I was a big fan of Dave party. That's why 0:17:23.400 --> 0:17:24.920 I was excited to have mine. I always et played 0:17:24.960 --> 0:17:28.080 in forever since the early nineties. But yeah, uh yeah, 0:17:28.119 --> 0:17:31.399 I mean, he he had style. And I told the story, 0:17:31.480 --> 0:17:33.520 you know, the sledge hammer when I was a kid, 0:17:33.720 --> 0:17:36.520 like remember going to you know, young guys going to 0:17:36.560 --> 0:17:39.600 Angel games and and just weren't very good that Dave 0:17:39.680 --> 0:17:43.360 Parker and Dave Winfield, but they weren't particularly good. And 0:17:43.359 --> 0:17:45.760 and I remember getting down near the on deck circle 0:17:45.920 --> 0:17:48.560 and and Dave Parker was like a bigger than life 0:17:48.600 --> 0:17:50.800 as he swung the sledge hammer and the on deck 0:17:50.880 --> 0:17:54.600 circle and I'm like, what, it's awesome, Man's it was 0:17:54.760 --> 0:17:57.560 like really cool, man, It's like four or something like that. 0:17:57.880 --> 0:18:00.600 But Flor's hammer. Could you imagine if you're a fan 0:18:00.640 --> 0:18:03.880 in Pittsburgh to have the balls though, to throw some 0:18:04.000 --> 0:18:09.240 bolts and nuts at him? Yeah, that is astronomically crazy. 0:18:09.320 --> 0:18:11.040 You hear stories like I don't want I was, you know, 0:18:11.080 --> 0:18:14.480 around the Dodgers back at Candlestick, they would throw batteries 0:18:14.520 --> 0:18:16.720 and things. I don't in Philadelphia they did that. But yeah, 0:18:16.720 --> 0:18:20.040 you fill a sock, that's a weapon. You could kill someone, Yes, 0:18:20.520 --> 0:18:23.800 you could kill them. I remember when the Broncos did 0:18:23.840 --> 0:18:25.360 that to the Raiders back in the day of those 0:18:25.400 --> 0:18:28.640 snowballs they pack, they'd pack batteries in them and then 0:18:28.680 --> 0:18:30.879 fire them and hit him in the head. I just 0:18:31.520 --> 0:18:35.600 I can't imagine that. I imagine doing that nowadays, No way. 0:18:35.640 --> 0:18:38.560 I mean you'd be prosecuted obviously, well you would be prosecuted, 0:18:38.600 --> 0:18:41.960 but I wouldn't be shocked if that stuff still occasionally 0:18:42.960 --> 0:18:46.600 takes place. There's always the Yahoo out there, and that's 0:18:46.600 --> 0:18:50.080 why I love HBO. They do some great documentaries. But 0:18:50.119 --> 0:18:52.439 they would do some features on the Broad Street Bullies, 0:18:52.560 --> 0:18:56.600 the old school Philadelphia Flyers and how the Philadelphia Spectrum 0:18:56.680 --> 0:18:59.880 was an absolute zoo, not because of all the the 0:19:00.119 --> 0:19:03.159 goal activity on the eyes, but they'd just be melee's 0:19:03.320 --> 0:19:06.199 in the stands of the Spectrum and people did not 0:19:06.320 --> 0:19:09.040 give a fuck. I mean, the Great Western form was 0:19:09.119 --> 0:19:12.280 like that on occasions for Lakers and Kings games, but 0:19:12.800 --> 0:19:15.080 I don't think I think it pales in comparison to 0:19:15.200 --> 0:19:19.000 what was the greatness of Philadelphia back in the day. Well, 0:19:19.040 --> 0:19:24.440 the Philadelphia sports fan is it's like a part animal, 0:19:24.680 --> 0:19:27.720 you know, part beast, part human, the Philly that's the 0:19:27.720 --> 0:19:32.200 reputation and the Yeah. I remember seeing UH in a 0:19:32.240 --> 0:19:34.560 story about the Philly Fanatic, Dave Raymond, the guy that 0:19:34.640 --> 0:19:38.159 became the Philly Fanatic, and like what he was doing 0:19:38.200 --> 0:19:40.520 and what he was walking into in Philadelphia when the 0:19:40.520 --> 0:19:44.160 fanatic was born as a mascot, and how he had 0:19:44.200 --> 0:19:49.680 to entertain the animals, right, the deplorable fans of the 0:19:50.280 --> 0:19:53.920 Phillies and UH, and he he was able to pull 0:19:53.960 --> 0:19:57.840 it off, and the greatest mascot of them all. But man, 0:19:57.920 --> 0:20:00.280 you go in there and you're you mean you people 0:20:00.280 --> 0:20:04.240 are vomiting on you. I mean, it's just it's just terrible. 0:20:04.720 --> 0:20:08.720 It's wretched and uh and you go out. You have 0:20:08.760 --> 0:20:12.000 the clown costume on through all the Mayhem, chaos and anarchy. 0:20:12.040 --> 0:20:14.760 And he pulled it off because you had the you 0:20:14.800 --> 0:20:17.160 have the seventies six years, you had the Flyers obviously, 0:20:17.320 --> 0:20:18.760 and then of course you go to the vet for 0:20:18.800 --> 0:20:20.879 the Phillies. Well, the Eagles is the most legendary and 0:20:21.040 --> 0:20:23.640 they were the first team to have NFL jail at 0:20:23.640 --> 0:20:25.600 the stadium. I remember that was like a big deal. 0:20:26.560 --> 0:20:29.560 It's like, wait a minute, you've got a judge. There's 0:20:29.600 --> 0:20:33.320 so many people getting arrested at Eagle games that you 0:20:33.400 --> 0:20:36.480 have to have a court, like a little mini courthouse 0:20:37.080 --> 0:20:40.600 in the in the stadium. I mean, what's what was 0:20:40.680 --> 0:20:44.280 that all about? It's crazy. I wish our court system 0:20:44.359 --> 0:20:47.080 was quicker like that nowadays. Oh yeah, and now it's 0:20:47.119 --> 0:20:51.640 a bridge to nowhere. Now. It's like that I've said, 0:20:51.680 --> 0:20:54.199 it was like that Homer Simpson, Not Homer, it's um, 0:20:54.359 --> 0:20:57.720 Grandpa Simpson. You know that famous meme where he walks in, 0:20:57.920 --> 0:21:01.000 puts his hat down, circles back, grabs his hat and 0:21:01.160 --> 0:21:03.679 his jacket, walks out. That's pretty much what it's like 0:21:03.720 --> 0:21:05.440 when you go to court for most things that you're 0:21:05.480 --> 0:21:08.240 in and out. It's like, that's what a hamburger is 0:21:08.240 --> 0:21:10.280 all about. That's what the justice system is all about. 0:21:10.320 --> 0:21:14.920 So I've got haunted Mansion. Uh, We've got a monster 0:21:15.160 --> 0:21:19.320 Mash Monster Mash, and a brief pop quiz, but let's 0:21:19.320 --> 0:21:20.960 start out with the Haunted Mansion. So it was an 0:21:20.960 --> 0:21:22.880 interesting week. I have not I don't believe I've told 0:21:22.880 --> 0:21:24.879 this story before, so I'll tell it right here. I 0:21:24.960 --> 0:21:27.719 saved it for the podcast. So the other night I 0:21:27.760 --> 0:21:31.760 was doing the radio show per Normal from the remote 0:21:31.960 --> 0:21:35.120 Fox Sports Radio studio here at the Mallard Mansion. And 0:21:35.160 --> 0:21:37.639 in one of the time outs we don't have breaks, 0:21:37.680 --> 0:21:39.199