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Speaker 1: Oh, in welcome to my house. I didn't recognize that

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Speaker 1: there was like a house on the corner that I

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Speaker 1: was like, I think fully, redid this house anything? I

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Speaker 1: don't know. I lived here every day, so I don't know.

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Speaker 1: You don't notice the small changes, slowly gaining weight, suddenly

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Speaker 1: my clothes don't fit. Happy New Year. Um, we are

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Speaker 1: recording in live in person and probably like over a

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Speaker 1: year we haven't done this. I can't I honestly can't

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Speaker 1: remember the last time I was in your house. I

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Speaker 1: loved as she said, though, you were like, you know what,

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Speaker 1: if I'm going to do this, I want to do

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Speaker 1: this right, and we feel like our energy is better

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Speaker 1: and you're actually more focused when we're in person. I

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Speaker 1: was like, she was like trying to get me just

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Speaker 1: to stay home, and I was like, I listen. I

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Speaker 1: was like, listen, if I'm at home, I'm not going

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Speaker 1: to be paying attention. I'm coming to your house, okay.

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Speaker 1: If somebody's called got hung up? Literally you put me

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Speaker 1: in my place so fast. I was like, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: it was I mean, I had warned you that I

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Speaker 1: was expecting a call, and of course came, but it

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Speaker 1: still I was like new year knew you. I do

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Speaker 1: agree with you, though our energy is better. I mean

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Speaker 1: sometimes you still get lost on your computer. Well, I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna try really hard. Only think I have opened my

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Speaker 1: references and my notes, Okay, I mean I actually feel

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Speaker 1: exactly what you said, though You're like I want I

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Speaker 1: want to like bring my best self to this podcast.

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Speaker 1: And I feel that way too. I think, like the

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Speaker 1: last couple of years has been so weird, and there

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Speaker 1: was a lot and we've been navigating all this ship

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Speaker 1: and like I feel that I don't feel that energy.

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Speaker 1: I finally feel like I'm laying ship down. Do you

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Speaker 1: feel that? Yeah? And I think we've tried. We've like

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Speaker 1: even sort of the structure of it. We've been playing

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Speaker 1: with it and trying to find the voice and and

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Speaker 1: all that, and I think it's so much easier to

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Speaker 1: like not give a Yeah, we're like doing it on

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Speaker 1: computer screens, and like I don't if I'm gonna do it,

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Speaker 1: I want to do it like you. Yeah, I wanna Like, Look,

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Speaker 1: I obviously we're all busy and things are going to

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Speaker 1: get it in the way, but you know, and we'll

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Speaker 1: get to this. But this year I want to allow

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Speaker 1: less things to get in the way of the things

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Speaker 1: that I want to give my energy to. Totally so,

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Speaker 1: and that's a choice, like you know, and yes, everyone's

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Speaker 1: life that you spoke coffee on your shirt and you

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Speaker 1: didn't mean to and that gets in your way, it's

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Speaker 1: going to happen whatever, But I can be very proactive

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Speaker 1: about trying to like show up right. I just want

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Speaker 1: to coast through life anymore. Yeah, And I think like

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Speaker 1: I feel like the last couple of years were survival

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Speaker 1: for a lot of people and now it's like, okay,

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Speaker 1: but what's next, and like we survived, We're here, and

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Speaker 1: how do I want to move forward? I think that

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Speaker 1: the new year is actually the perfect time to set

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Speaker 1: these intentions. And um, we kind of always start the

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Speaker 1: year with It's not a resolution setting, I wouldn't say that,

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Speaker 1: but I do these things where I put um words

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Speaker 1: to each year. And so you and I were going

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Speaker 1: to kind of put together a word for each year,

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Speaker 1: and I'm sorry, what a word for our year? I

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Speaker 1: want to do my best, but maybe I'm out of practice.

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Speaker 1: After taking three weeks off, Am I making you nervous?

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Speaker 1: Like watching you work? You know what your presence is

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Speaker 1: making me so nervous. I'm like, we have to make

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Speaker 1: got contemn what oh god, the vulnerability if one of

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Speaker 1: us is ticking their nose though it's not me, That's

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Speaker 1: all I'm saying, one of us, out of the two

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Speaker 1: of us, is picking your nose. Definitely not me anyway, Um,

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Speaker 1: we don't set resolutions. And actually, Ryan Hayden, who was

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Speaker 1: here a couple months ago on the podcast, she's like

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Speaker 1: a spiritual coach. She also owns this place or sorry

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Speaker 1: Um is the program director at this place in New

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Speaker 1: York called Stage and Sound. I've talked about it a

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Speaker 1: couple of times. She's amazing. But she put out this

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Speaker 1: caption UM for a post she did the other day

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Speaker 1: about resolutions, and I thought this was so right on.

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Speaker 1: She said, as we entered the new year, were surrounded

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Speaker 1: by resume alustions and goal setting for a better you

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Speaker 1: in the year ahead. That is an old frequency, or

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Speaker 1: that has an old frequency to it, of outsourcing power

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Speaker 1: coming from lack. I had never thought of that. But

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Speaker 1: like when you're setting a resolution, you're saying I didn't

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Speaker 1: do something, I didn't get something, and so you're coming

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Speaker 1: in like trying to say I'm gonna do this or whatever,

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Speaker 1: and it's it is from a place of lack. It's

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Speaker 1: from this place that I need something more. And what

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Speaker 1: I'm learning about like manifesting and moving into positive energy

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Speaker 1: in your life is that you have to believe that

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Speaker 1: you can have it as if you already have something,

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Speaker 1: like you have to operate that way to put that

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Speaker 1: energy out like at a higher vibration, not from this

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Speaker 1: like you know, like I didn't get this or whatever,

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Speaker 1: and so I loved that. And so with all of

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Speaker 1: that said, I don't ever set resolutions anymore. And I

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Speaker 1: didn't really realize why, but I think this is the

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Speaker 1: feeling I get with them is sort of like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna go to the gym this year, blah blah blah.

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Speaker 1: That's like the big res solution most people make. Well

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Speaker 1: it's because you didn't go to the gym last year,

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Speaker 1: do you know? And so like, but like what if

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Speaker 1: you came from a place of like my health is

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Speaker 1: going to be a priority and you just took the

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Speaker 1: action steps to do. Yeah, I don't want to love

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Speaker 1: on my body like my body is amazing and I

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Speaker 1: want to treat it better or whatever. It is, Like

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Speaker 1: I'm sure I'm not saying it perfectly. But I like

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Speaker 1: that idea of like I'm not going to come from

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Speaker 1: this place of what I don't have, I'm going to

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Speaker 1: come in and as this place of like this is

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Speaker 1: the vibe that I want for my year. And so

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Speaker 1: I sat words every year. My word last year was

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Speaker 1: fly and that was really what I needed. Like I

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Speaker 1: was in a very stuck energy and it took me

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Speaker 1: all year, Like I really do feel like this last

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Speaker 1: couple of months of is when I finally felt freedom

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Speaker 1: again of just like some things that were holding me down.

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Speaker 1: It wasn't necessarily like anyone else's stuff, but my own

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Speaker 1: stuff like just holding me down and I was stuck.

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Speaker 1: And I finally feel like I've like let the chains go,

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Speaker 1: Like I'm changing the narratives in my head daily, I'm

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Speaker 1: working on that, and like I feel this lighter energy

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Speaker 1: and so I feel like that intention was Matt, which

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Speaker 1: is the best feeling to leave a year with. Like

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Speaker 1: I literally walked into the new year so happy because

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, a flu Like I'm here,

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Speaker 1: I'm flying um. And so you and I are going

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Speaker 1: to sit here today and we're going to do our

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Speaker 1: words and maybe talk a little bit about did you

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Speaker 1: said a word last year? I feel like we did this.

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Speaker 1: It's funny because I hadn't thought about whether or not

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Speaker 1: I had achieved what I was looking for. My word

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Speaker 1: was clarity last year. Oh my god, I just got chilled.

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Speaker 1: And now that I'm looking, now that I can look back, yeah,

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Speaker 1: there's so much more clarity in my life. And I

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Speaker 1: don't I can't. I can't look at like specific things

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Speaker 1: that I chose to do in seeking clarity. But by

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Speaker 1: laying that foundation, I found it. He found me or

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Speaker 1: you just put that energy out there. Yeah, I mean,

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Speaker 1: and I mean I can look at thinks. I can

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Speaker 1: look at things that happened throughout the year and be like,

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Speaker 1: that was Clarity raising its hand. That was Clarity raising

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Speaker 1: its hand. That was Clarity raising its hand. Yeah. And

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Speaker 1: um so now I can look back and like ship

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Speaker 1: this works. Yeah, it works. I just had this thought

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Speaker 1: too of you and like the things that I've seen

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Speaker 1: in your life, and I think when we first started

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Speaker 1: texting about this too, I was like, I feel like

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Speaker 1: it's so much easier to see in other people, you know,

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Speaker 1: but I like watched you grow this year, which is

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Speaker 1: so fun to see, right, now. I mean I should

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Speaker 1: mention the card that you sent me. It was the

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Speaker 1: sweetest thing ever. I don't even remember what I said

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Speaker 1: about that, about how proud you were in the growth

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Speaker 1: that I have this year you have though, and like

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Speaker 1: I've seen you evolve in real time, which is just

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Speaker 1: amazing to see. And um, I think I'm about my

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Speaker 1: period because I can't look at you because I'm so emotional.

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Speaker 1: Look over here. But but anyway, I think, um that

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Speaker 1: word specifically, you were confused about work at the beginning

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Speaker 1: of the year, I remember, and like dating and all,

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Speaker 1: and like you're thriving and like you're in the flow

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Speaker 1: you can I didn't know if you wanted me to

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Speaker 1: say it. Yes yesterday he was like, are you gonna

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Speaker 1: talk about me on your podcast? Whatever? Whatever. I got

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Speaker 1: to mention I we're saying his name and everybody don't care.

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Speaker 1: He's the cutest. Um. Well, okay, I feel like I

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Speaker 1: just need to stop though. No, I mean, you can't

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Speaker 1: tease the listeners like that. We'll get back to him anyway.

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Speaker 1: I just have seen you like find your flow and

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Speaker 1: find yourself a lot in that, and that doesn't mean

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Speaker 1: like you're not going to keep growing or like it's done,

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Speaker 1: but like clarity, Yes, you got some and you really

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Speaker 1: set that intention out, which is amazing. Okay, I'll talk

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Speaker 1: about Mark. No, we don't have to go into detail

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Speaker 1: about him. But I think it's funny because it's like

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Speaker 1: that was part of what I was seeking. Yeah, and

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Speaker 1: it was kind of like an accidental thing, like I

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Speaker 1: wasn't expecting it. Well, you're closed off at the beginning

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Speaker 1: of year, and you know, it's like we made all

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Speaker 1: the jokes. I mean, and we've been joking about Slotter

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Speaker 1: Ploza for three years now. It feels like but it's

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Speaker 1: like and it's not me, and that's that wasn't ever

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Speaker 1: really going to be the way that UM things came together.

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Speaker 1: I mean, although it was sort of but more away

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Speaker 1: anyway you can keep something. And it's like, is it

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Speaker 1: interesting when you like meet somebody and it's really like

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Speaker 1: you what didn't feel like I was like actively searching

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Speaker 1: you weren't UM and but you weren't not either, like

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Speaker 1: you were going through motions of things and like on

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Speaker 1: apps and actually going on dates. I feel like more

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Speaker 1: so than you ever, not ever than you have been

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Speaker 1: in the last couple of years. So you're opening yourself

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Speaker 1: up and the universe is like, oh, here you go,

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Speaker 1: trip and it's been easy and great, right, great, it's

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Speaker 1: been easy. Yeah, he's getting like all shy about it now. Well,

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Speaker 1: I mean it's so new that there's no you know,

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Speaker 1: hopefully you know we're still talking about him in a while. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I think the best thing I've noticed is like it

201
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Speaker 1: just seems really easy, like you'll just have again a flow,

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Speaker 1: like that's the word of the hour right now. But

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Speaker 1: let's change the words. So, okay, do you want to

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Speaker 1: talk about yours first or you want me to go first? Okay.

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Speaker 1: So I was telling you I've had this quote on

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Speaker 1: this little like um clipboard in my guest room. It

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Speaker 1: was in my room in my last place, but it's

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Speaker 1: in my guest room now, so I don't see it

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Speaker 1: all the time. But I was in there the other day,

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Speaker 1: like cleaning some jewelry. It's like, who am I don't

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Speaker 1: even know. I've really been all my ship. I don't know,

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Speaker 1: I don't I'm flying. But I saw it, and I

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Speaker 1: was because I was kind of contemplating what words are,

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Speaker 1: and so I don't think it was a mistake that

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Speaker 1: I noticed it. Or what my word was going to be.

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Speaker 1: And so it's the man in the arena quote. And

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Speaker 1: if you follow burnet Brown like I'm about to go,

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Speaker 1: so berne on your asses like it is literally every

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Speaker 1: thing I'm about to say is very burnet Brown. But

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Speaker 1: it's a Theodore Roosevelt quote, and I'm just gonna read

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Speaker 1: it. It It says, it's not the critic who counts, not

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Speaker 1: the man who points out how how the strong man stumbles,

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Speaker 1: or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.

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Speaker 1: The credit belongs to the man who is actually in

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Speaker 1: the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat

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Speaker 1: and blood, who strives valiantly, who airs, who comes short

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Speaker 1: again and again, who spends himself in the worthy cause,

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Speaker 1: who at the best, in the end knows, I'm sorry,

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Speaker 1: in the end, the triumph of high achievement, And who,

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Speaker 1: at his worst, if he fails, at least fails while

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Speaker 1: daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with

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Speaker 1: those cold and timid souls who never who neither no

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Speaker 1: victory nor defeat. That like that used to mean a

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Speaker 1: lot to me when I was, you know, really putting

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Speaker 1: myself out there and I was on a TV show

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Speaker 1: and I was doing this podcast, and I would just

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Speaker 1: remind myself because you get so much hate, and I

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Speaker 1: was like, it doesn't matter. I'm in there. I'm trying,

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Speaker 1: even though, like even when I first started Velvet Edge,

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Speaker 1: I had a lot of like hate from people who

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Speaker 1: know me, not a joking yeah or like or just

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Speaker 1: like even when I would blog, like kind of like okay,

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Speaker 1: what is this, Like you know, like your friends will

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Speaker 1: always kind of make fun with a fun of you

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Speaker 1: and whatever, and I was like really focused and I

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Speaker 1: didn't care because I was just like, okay, fine, and

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Speaker 1: it would get in my head a little bit, but

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Speaker 1: at the end of the day, like you can't help

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Speaker 1: what you're driven to, and like for some reason, I

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Speaker 1: was pulled in that direction. So I just kept moving forward.

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Speaker 1: And in the last couple of years, I think so

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Speaker 1: many things have like I would I would look at

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Speaker 1: them this last year as just losses, Like I was

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Speaker 1: just feeling so defeated because everything I felt like I

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Speaker 1: tried kind of quote unquote failed. Um. But it's like

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Speaker 1: it's sort of just dawned on me again recently, Like

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Speaker 1: why I think I've been feeling this ladder energy is

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Speaker 1: just like it's okay, Like it evolved and it served

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Speaker 1: its purpose in my life, and like I've really settled

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Speaker 1: into that energy of like things come in seasons and

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Speaker 1: they served a purpose, and even sometimes if it's a

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Speaker 1: painful ending, like that ending has served a purpose because

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Speaker 1: it's made me better and like it's shown me so

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Speaker 1: much more about myself and like I've had to evolve

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Speaker 1: through it. I like it's you know, it's always that

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Speaker 1: mirror thing, or it's like I wouldn't have seen some

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Speaker 1: certain things in myself that I didn't like or that

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Speaker 1: I needed to like, or I had just grown out of,

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Speaker 1: or that weren't in alignment with me and like who

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Speaker 1: I can be And so um, I just started thinking

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Speaker 1: about that again. And it's like if you think of

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Speaker 1: any I say this every time I have a really

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Speaker 1: successful person on here, like I want to know your

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Speaker 1: full story because we so often talk about, you know,

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Speaker 1: when people hit their peak and they're like what's their

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Speaker 1: super successful business or like what's the song that made

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Speaker 1: them so famous? But we never talked about like the

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Speaker 1: full journey that helped them get there, or like all

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Speaker 1: the times they were told, yeah, all the businesses that

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Speaker 1: didn't work before that, and I find that so important

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Speaker 1: and I was like, oh, that's all that's happened. Like

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Speaker 1: it's literally like I am sitting here like beating myself up,

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Speaker 1: like I'm a failure. And it's like, no, that idea

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Speaker 1: just ring its course or that served as purpose. That

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Speaker 1: season is done. You can take what you like from

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Speaker 1: that leave the rest, Like where do you want to

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Speaker 1: move forward? And so, since I'm feeling lighter, my new

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Speaker 1: word moving forward again. I took out of this daring greatly,

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Speaker 1: which you said when you read was like the big piece,

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Speaker 1: which is the very brunet brown piece of it for me,

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Speaker 1: um and that I didn't want two words, so I

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Speaker 1: just said dare And that like really feels right to

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Speaker 1: me because I've always sort of been this, like I

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Speaker 1: don't necessarily think things through all the way and I'm

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Speaker 1: just like pulled in directions and I have to fucking

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Speaker 1: follow it like I can't. Like moving to Nashville was

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Speaker 1: like that for me. I didn't have a job. My

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Speaker 1: parents were like excuse me, what, like you're moving? I

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Speaker 1: was like, no, I have to go, And so I

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Speaker 1: lost that a little bit. The steaks got higher as

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Speaker 1: I got older and I feel like I've lost that,

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Speaker 1: Like I think, I like, I'll let fear start guiding

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Speaker 1: me instead of the daring piece of me, and so

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Speaker 1: I want to lean back into that. I have absolutely

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Speaker 1: no clue what that means as far as like what

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Speaker 1: I want to start or what I want to like

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Speaker 1: put my energy into yet, but I started, like the

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Speaker 1: last couple of days, taking just one next right step,

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Speaker 1: like an action step, and I'm like, that's how I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna dare is I'm gonna like not be scared. I'm

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Speaker 1: not going to listen to the critical voices in my

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Speaker 1: head that tell me like I'm not good enough to

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Speaker 1: do this, or the reason that failed is because I

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Speaker 1: sucked it up, like I'm not doing that anymore, um

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Speaker 1: out or and I have a lot of those. It's

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Speaker 1: one thing to seek advice, It's yeah, I mean, it's

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Speaker 1: like you should definitely seek advice from the people that

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Speaker 1: you trust, but it's only advice. It's and it's everyone's

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Speaker 1: projecting all the time. Like I've I've really started to

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Speaker 1: lean into that too, because even people that I really

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Speaker 1: admire and I put on a pedestal because either they've

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Speaker 1: achieved great things or you know, I respect the way

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Speaker 1: they live their life. They can only tell me the

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Speaker 1: answer or like give me a eyes through their lens

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Speaker 1: of life. And so you have to like really lean

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Speaker 1: into yourself. And I think that's what I was forced

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Speaker 1: to do last year, and it's been the most beautiful

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Speaker 1: gift of my entire life. I'm not kidding, like as

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Speaker 1: fucking painful as it was for me to have to

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Speaker 1: now like go get advice like you said, or talk

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Speaker 1: things through with people who I trust and respect. Ultimately,

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Speaker 1: I know I'm the only authority over my life and

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Speaker 1: I can't listen to these outside voices to guide me

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Speaker 1: because I tried that and it just didn't work because

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Speaker 1: I got out of a line. I lost myself. Um,

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Speaker 1: and that goes for everything, dating, like all of it.

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Speaker 1: Like I just have to know that I'm on a

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Speaker 1: journey and I have as long as I'm connected to

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Speaker 1: myself and my higher power, like I'm going to know

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Speaker 1: what to do and trusting that like not going, well,

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Speaker 1: oh that's your childhood wound speaking like it's like no,

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Speaker 1: maybe it's just like your gut. My gut is really

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Speaker 1: fucking strong. So anyway, I wrote down to like dare

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Speaker 1: for me there's it can go adjective down or verb,

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Speaker 1: which obviously we usually use it in a verb statement,

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Speaker 1: but um, that means like as a verb, it's asn't challenging,

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Speaker 1: like I dare you to do something. So I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: dare myself and I'm gonna dare myself to keep being vulnerable,

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Speaker 1: to be brave, to walk forward even if I'm scared

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Speaker 1: or I fully don't know where I'm doing where I'm going,

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Speaker 1: and I'm just going to keep that energy all year

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Speaker 1: and I'm gonna trust like that it's gonna just like

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Speaker 1: you said, like gosh, you're with clarity, Like if I

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Speaker 1: keep daring, I just I just know it's gonna like

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Speaker 1: work itself out, or like it already is working itself out,

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Speaker 1: but like it's just going to be beautiful. So I

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Speaker 1: love the energy. Thank you, thank you? My Um, I

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Speaker 1: mean mine, isn't that just similar. It's just a sort

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Speaker 1: of different approach to it. And I'm curious if like

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Speaker 1: you felt this. And I know, like the industry that

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Speaker 1: we work in is different than a lot of people,

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Speaker 1: like we basically take it's like three weeks at the

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Speaker 1: end of the year and you literally just live in

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Speaker 1: sweatpants and do not sex down and um. And I

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Speaker 1: think part of coming back and feeling re energized a

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Speaker 1: is from that rest. It's essential that you get that rest.

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Speaker 1: But there's also like I start to feel like a

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Speaker 1: big piece of ship that like I'm like, what am

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Speaker 1: I doing? And um during the time you're off, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's just like I I start to feel like I

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Speaker 1: don't have purpose, like what am I doing? And um?

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Speaker 1: And which is funny because it's like that's surely some

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Speaker 1: of the workaholic in me is like creeping back up.

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Speaker 1: But like literally, I'm like I start to get bored.

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Speaker 1: I'm like start to think like I'm not needed anymore

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Speaker 1: and all those things. Um, But now I also feel rested.

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Speaker 1: So I'm I have to be careful with how I

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Speaker 1: talk to myself. But my word is purpose. And it

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Speaker 1: was like, look, I've always felt like I have a purpose,

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Speaker 1: so it's not just about seeking purpose this year for me.

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Speaker 1: And this phrase just popped in my head. This is

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna quote myself. I want to approach everything with purpose,

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Speaker 1: on purpose, for a purpose. That that was like my

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Speaker 1: like thought about that word, um, and I was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I'm justin Bieber like, and you know what's funny. I

386
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Speaker 1: I was thinking about his album title, and I was like,

387
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Speaker 1: when it was an album title, I thought, that's the

388
00:19:23,680 --> 00:19:27,439
Speaker 1: weirdest fucking album title. But like now I kind of

389
00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:30,640
Speaker 1: get it, you know. And I also feel like that

390
00:19:30,760 --> 00:19:33,119
Speaker 1: was the moment in his life where things started to

391
00:19:33,119 --> 00:19:36,320
Speaker 1: feel a lot more intentional. He got married, he kind

392
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Speaker 1: of grew up around that record, and the songs were

393
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Speaker 1: a lot more mature, and I think like he sort

394
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Speaker 1: of solidified his place in music because he was teetering

395
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Speaker 1: on like kind of you know, he could have gone

396
00:19:47,920 --> 00:19:49,919
Speaker 1: away because he was starting to funk a lot of

397
00:19:49,920 --> 00:19:52,520
Speaker 1: things up and whatever. So um, And I'm not I

398
00:19:52,520 --> 00:19:54,159
Speaker 1: don't even know that much about him. I just know

399
00:19:54,320 --> 00:19:57,399
Speaker 1: like in that timeline, that's kind of where it's like

400
00:19:57,440 --> 00:20:00,680
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, he's just a flawed human being,

401
00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:05,520
Speaker 1: you know, talented anyway. So purpose is my word, And

402
00:20:05,840 --> 00:20:08,919
Speaker 1: so I did. I did like a little reading about

403
00:20:08,960 --> 00:20:11,120
Speaker 1: it and was like, well, you know, why is purpose important?

404
00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:16,399
Speaker 1: And like, um, and again, the stuff that I found

405
00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:18,840
Speaker 1: is a little bit more about like knowing your purpose

406
00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:23,520
Speaker 1: and finding your purpose. It's not about like necessarily being purposeful.

407
00:20:23,720 --> 00:20:26,680
Speaker 1: And I think maybe that's a little more the way

408
00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:30,280
Speaker 1: that I'm leaning is like purposeful, um, but it's still

409
00:20:30,320 --> 00:20:34,200
Speaker 1: like more like on purpose, which is I guess purposeful.

410
00:20:34,600 --> 00:20:36,280
Speaker 1: But yeah, I mean it's like there's a lot of

411
00:20:36,320 --> 00:20:38,880
Speaker 1: benefits to just like having a purpose. Like they say

412
00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:42,560
Speaker 1: you can live longer. Um, you know you're healthier because

413
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Speaker 1: you you, um, you wake up and there's something that

414
00:20:45,480 --> 00:20:50,640
Speaker 1: you're you're living to do. I mean, I think back

415
00:20:50,640 --> 00:20:53,840
Speaker 1: to even my grandmother when she was on her deathbed.

416
00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:56,639
Speaker 1: My sister was pregnant and every day she's like, is

417
00:20:56,680 --> 00:20:59,040
Speaker 1: that baby here? And she wasn't eating, like she was

418
00:20:59,080 --> 00:21:00,920
Speaker 1: just wasting away. She don't want to be alive anymore.

419
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:03,600
Speaker 1: She was old, her friends and family were all dead.

420
00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:05,520
Speaker 1: She just didn't want to be but she had fucking

421
00:21:05,520 --> 00:21:09,600
Speaker 1: purpose and did she die right after she saw a

422
00:21:09,640 --> 00:21:12,000
Speaker 1: picture of the baby and she died that night. It's

423
00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:15,200
Speaker 1: literally it's Chris. She said, Lord, you can take me now,

424
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Speaker 1: and she died in her sleep. That way, I think

425
00:21:19,320 --> 00:21:22,200
Speaker 1: it's everything, Like as you're speaking, you're giving me so

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00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:25,800
Speaker 1: much insight into what happened to me, like a genuinely

427
00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:28,440
Speaker 1: like I've said this on my Instagram, like also have

428
00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:31,280
Speaker 1: like basically quit Instagram trying to get that's one of

429
00:21:31,320 --> 00:21:33,000
Speaker 1: the things I want to get back to what I I

430
00:21:33,080 --> 00:21:35,160
Speaker 1: didn't mean to. But like, first of all, social media

431
00:21:35,160 --> 00:21:38,280
Speaker 1: is annoying to me sometimes now, but also like when

432
00:21:38,320 --> 00:21:40,919
Speaker 1: you don't have a purpose, I'm like, what is my points?

433
00:21:41,480 --> 00:21:44,040
Speaker 1: Like what am I trying to say? And that shifted

434
00:21:44,080 --> 00:21:46,159
Speaker 1: so much, but I think for a lot of people,

435
00:21:46,280 --> 00:21:48,240
Speaker 1: I don't know if any of the listeners resonate. But

436
00:21:48,320 --> 00:21:51,520
Speaker 1: that was like the big thing that happened during COVID,

437
00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:54,840
Speaker 1: like like your job still stayed more than mine. I

438
00:21:55,040 --> 00:21:58,960
Speaker 1: lost my job like essentially, and I mean I lost

439
00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:01,119
Speaker 1: it in a multiple way days just because of some

440
00:22:01,240 --> 00:22:04,640
Speaker 1: different things. And then like having fertility issues, like that's

441
00:22:04,680 --> 00:22:08,679
Speaker 1: a big purpose for a woman like so to feel

442
00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:11,719
Speaker 1: those things is so defeating, Like it was hard for

443
00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:13,600
Speaker 1: me to show up every day and be like what

444
00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:16,919
Speaker 1: is my point? And you do slip into depression. So

445
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:20,119
Speaker 1: I think it's like I think it can be such

446
00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:24,200
Speaker 1: an energy, like not just shift, but like it's such

447
00:22:24,240 --> 00:22:27,120
Speaker 1: an important energy in our daily lives. No matter what

448
00:22:27,240 --> 00:22:30,240
Speaker 1: the purpose is, it's that you feel, like you said,

449
00:22:30,320 --> 00:22:33,000
Speaker 1: you feel like you're needed in some capacity, you feel

450
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:35,480
Speaker 1: like you have a direction, to your day. You feel

451
00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:38,320
Speaker 1: like you have somewhere you need to be Like when

452
00:22:38,359 --> 00:22:41,360
Speaker 1: I didn't have that, like I was so misguided. You're

453
00:22:41,600 --> 00:22:45,280
Speaker 1: you're like floating along right, Yeah, And look, it doesn't

454
00:22:45,320 --> 00:22:48,960
Speaker 1: have to be nothing. These things don't have to be grandiose,

455
00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:51,560
Speaker 1: you know. It could be like your purpose is the

456
00:22:51,640 --> 00:22:55,560
Speaker 1: Christmas tree today? Yeah, he's looking at mine because here

457
00:22:55,560 --> 00:22:59,040
Speaker 1: it's like it's actually fake. So that's hilarious, but it's no,

458
00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:01,679
Speaker 1: it's it's a have. Um. I have a little like

459
00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:03,840
Speaker 1: diffuser because I have to have fake trees because it

460
00:23:03,920 --> 00:23:07,400
Speaker 1: wants allergic. But anyway, well it's beautiful, thank you, thank you.

461
00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:09,720
Speaker 1: But yeah, like it could be that, or like your

462
00:23:09,720 --> 00:23:12,159
Speaker 1: purpose is to keep the kitchen clean every day, if

463
00:23:12,320 --> 00:23:14,359
Speaker 1: that is the one thing you do every day, or

464
00:23:14,600 --> 00:23:17,920
Speaker 1: it's just anything like to go on a walk, like

465
00:23:18,520 --> 00:23:21,520
Speaker 1: if you set the intention, or you have somewhere that

466
00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:24,400
Speaker 1: you have to hold yourself like there's like an obligatory

467
00:23:24,480 --> 00:23:27,320
Speaker 1: thing of your day. I think it changes everything in

468
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:30,360
Speaker 1: us as humans. And I think too, it's like today,

469
00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:32,680
Speaker 1: I'm gonna wake up and I'm gonna be a really

470
00:23:32,760 --> 00:23:35,520
Speaker 1: lazy sack of ship and I'm gonna watch the New

471
00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:38,760
Speaker 1: Lindsay Lohan movie seven Times, right, Like, as much as

472
00:23:38,760 --> 00:23:44,040
Speaker 1: I think we want that choice that you're saying, you know,

473
00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:46,040
Speaker 1: if you are sitting on the couch and you're like,

474
00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:48,800
Speaker 1: I don't know why I sat here all day, then

475
00:23:48,960 --> 00:23:51,119
Speaker 1: maybe it's time to find some purpose. Well yeah, but

476
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:54,199
Speaker 1: your intention behind that purpose is to rest or something

477
00:23:54,280 --> 00:23:56,080
Speaker 1: as you shut your brain off because you've been so

478
00:23:56,119 --> 00:23:58,720
Speaker 1: busy or whatever it is. But I think, like what

479
00:23:58,880 --> 00:24:01,639
Speaker 1: I when I heard you first that, I was like, um,

480
00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:03,960
Speaker 1: as much as we crave that, just like you said

481
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:07,520
Speaker 1: the three weeks of it, you were like, just like,

482
00:24:07,720 --> 00:24:10,920
Speaker 1: as humans, we need purpose right right. Well, and then

483
00:24:10,960 --> 00:24:13,119
Speaker 1: so you know, i look back on that three weeks

484
00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:17,040
Speaker 1: now and I'm like, no, this year, I'm on those

485
00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:20,800
Speaker 1: three weeks, I'm going to on purpose do nothing. I'm

486
00:24:21,119 --> 00:24:23,720
Speaker 1: funk all and I'm not going to respond to people's emails.

487
00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:25,720
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna respond to text because you know what

488
00:24:25,760 --> 00:24:28,359
Speaker 1: to do twenty four hours a day all of the

489
00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:31,840
Speaker 1: rest of the year. So on purpose, I'm going to disappear.

490
00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:35,919
Speaker 1: And so but even that has a purpose. So you know,

491
00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:38,400
Speaker 1: it's it's I think it's just about like looking at

492
00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:41,760
Speaker 1: for me, I'm just going to be more intentional about things,

493
00:24:41,840 --> 00:24:44,760
Speaker 1: like I'm on purpose, not going to do the things

494
00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:47,800
Speaker 1: I don't want to do. I'm just like, I want

495
00:24:47,840 --> 00:24:50,160
Speaker 1: to do the things that I want to do, which

496
00:24:50,200 --> 00:24:52,119
Speaker 1: is what this ties back into the beginning of the

497
00:24:52,119 --> 00:24:55,080
Speaker 1: conversation when you were like, I want to do this podcast,

498
00:24:55,119 --> 00:24:57,080
Speaker 1: and so I want to do it with purpose and

499
00:24:57,080 --> 00:25:00,439
Speaker 1: do it well right. Yeah, I love that. It's like

500
00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:03,600
Speaker 1: giving me inspiration to you. Should I get like the

501
00:25:03,680 --> 00:25:09,600
Speaker 1: Justin Bieber purpose tattoo? I'm kidding. I literally went silent,

502
00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:12,160
Speaker 1: but we got a really bad tattoo of Justin Bieber's

503
00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:18,000
Speaker 1: face looks like Justin Bieber, And I'm like, I know,

504
00:25:18,160 --> 00:25:20,640
Speaker 1: would it be like the state that's on your arm

505
00:25:20,640 --> 00:25:23,840
Speaker 1: that looks like a penis? Like to get these things

506
00:25:23,840 --> 00:25:30,720
Speaker 1: that look like other things. I literally when you first

507
00:25:30,760 --> 00:25:32,399
Speaker 1: said that, I was like, he wouldn't just get the

508
00:25:32,440 --> 00:25:34,480
Speaker 1: word purpose because that would make too much since he

509
00:25:34,520 --> 00:25:37,560
Speaker 1: would one go for Justin Bieber's face, Like I knew

510
00:25:37,600 --> 00:25:40,359
Speaker 1: that's what you would really bad drawing. Yeah, but the

511
00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:43,560
Speaker 1: woman who was fixed that the picture of Jesus, like

512
00:25:43,680 --> 00:25:46,960
Speaker 1: I wanted to like be so bad. What are you talking?

513
00:25:47,040 --> 00:25:49,919
Speaker 1: I'll show it to you later. Some woman was hired

514
00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:53,440
Speaker 1: to like clean up this portrait of Jesus, and why

515
00:25:53,440 --> 00:25:55,240
Speaker 1: are we doing I don't know, because it was it

516
00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:57,600
Speaker 1: was it was like this really ancient painting and she

517
00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:04,239
Speaker 1: completely funked it up, pretty killed to everyone who hired her.

518
00:26:04,760 --> 00:26:11,800
Speaker 1: It's so bad. Just like jokes on y'all before. Um,

519
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:14,720
Speaker 1: that's the tattoo artists I want to give. Oh my god,

520
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:16,720
Speaker 1: please don't get a justin be we're facing on you

521
00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:20,239
Speaker 1: get the word purpose. Yeah, they can go under their

522
00:26:20,320 --> 00:26:25,680
Speaker 1: rather words on your body. I'm not gonna do a tattoo,

523
00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:27,720
Speaker 1: but I always have I have this little like, um,

524
00:26:27,760 --> 00:26:29,560
Speaker 1: what do you call that thing chip? It's like a

525
00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:33,840
Speaker 1: board that you put letters, a letter board. It's a

526
00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:35,720
Speaker 1: board you put letters in. A chip says it's a

527
00:26:35,800 --> 00:26:39,159
Speaker 1: letter board. You know. It's like a menu board almost, yeah,

528
00:26:39,359 --> 00:26:42,800
Speaker 1: but like a small one. I have it, yeah, And

529
00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:44,840
Speaker 1: so I have it in the wall where I sit

530
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:48,040
Speaker 1: every time we record this podcast or I record any podcast,

531
00:26:48,320 --> 00:26:50,560
Speaker 1: and I see my word and so it's very intentional

532
00:26:50,640 --> 00:26:52,600
Speaker 1: that it's right there, and so now it's going to

533
00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:55,199
Speaker 1: say dare So every time I get nervous doing this podcast.

534
00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:57,159
Speaker 1: I booked a really big guest yesterday, and I was like,

535
00:26:57,200 --> 00:27:00,640
Speaker 1: oh my god, like if it's there, it's at Dare

536
00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:04,440
Speaker 1: Dare like the drug ones. I thought about that, I've

537
00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:07,720
Speaker 1: got one, you do? Oh my god, I need to

538
00:27:07,720 --> 00:27:10,520
Speaker 1: get one. Yeah. But I just think it's like it's

539
00:27:10,560 --> 00:27:13,240
Speaker 1: like giving yourself a high five in some ways when

540
00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:15,080
Speaker 1: you see it every day, you're like, am I doing that?

541
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:17,360
Speaker 1: And then where do I need to reset? If I'm not?

542
00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:20,239
Speaker 1: And then if I am, like good job, or if

543
00:27:20,280 --> 00:27:22,360
Speaker 1: you get like an email that you feel really defeated

544
00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:24,119
Speaker 1: or something like, you can like look up at the

545
00:27:24,119 --> 00:27:26,359
Speaker 1: word and be like you know what, fuck you? Yeah.

546
00:27:26,920 --> 00:27:29,680
Speaker 1: I Actually it's so interesting you say that because when

547
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:32,639
Speaker 1: I started this week, Um, I actually started on Monday,

548
00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:34,080
Speaker 1: which I know a lot of people didn't, but I

549
00:27:34,119 --> 00:27:37,280
Speaker 1: was like out to like really take over the world

550
00:27:37,280 --> 00:27:40,000
Speaker 1: on Monday. And it felt really good because I haven't

551
00:27:40,040 --> 00:27:42,159
Speaker 1: felt that way in a really long time. But I

552
00:27:42,200 --> 00:27:44,840
Speaker 1: was sending out emails, like just reconnecting with people over

553
00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:46,879
Speaker 1: the years, and like I got a lot back, and

554
00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:49,200
Speaker 1: then I got that guest, Like it was amazing because

555
00:27:49,200 --> 00:27:52,040
Speaker 1: I tried last year to get that guests and um

556
00:27:52,080 --> 00:27:56,400
Speaker 1: I got him, and I was so excited and then

557
00:27:56,520 --> 00:27:58,919
Speaker 1: like you don't hear back from some and in my

558
00:27:59,040 --> 00:28:02,399
Speaker 1: old narrative, my brain wanted to be like, oh, that's

559
00:28:02,440 --> 00:28:03,880
Speaker 1: because you're not good and they don't want to work

560
00:28:03,880 --> 00:28:06,520
Speaker 1: with you anymore. Something turns out like an hour later,

561
00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:09,639
Speaker 1: I got most of them back the day off. But

562
00:28:09,680 --> 00:28:11,880
Speaker 1: it showed me how quickly I want to go beat

563
00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:14,440
Speaker 1: myself up and take it personal or do the things.

564
00:28:14,480 --> 00:28:17,240
Speaker 1: And I stopped myself thankfully because I caught it and

565
00:28:17,280 --> 00:28:19,760
Speaker 1: I was able to be like today was a victory,

566
00:28:19,760 --> 00:28:23,080
Speaker 1: Like you got one back that was positive, that's enough.

567
00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:26,520
Speaker 1: Like I ended up getting way more back that were positive,

568
00:28:26,600 --> 00:28:30,399
Speaker 1: but like it just it reminded me of like I

569
00:28:30,440 --> 00:28:33,320
Speaker 1: can't get stuck in the negative. Like if it doesn't,

570
00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:35,480
Speaker 1: if it's a no, it's a move on. It's like

571
00:28:35,760 --> 00:28:39,520
Speaker 1: then there's something better for me, like not personalizing, not

572
00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:42,120
Speaker 1: taking everything so to heart, and like that is also

573
00:28:42,160 --> 00:28:44,080
Speaker 1: the energy that comes with daring to me, it's just

574
00:28:44,120 --> 00:28:46,000
Speaker 1: being like I'm gonna put this out there. Does that

575
00:28:46,040 --> 00:28:48,960
Speaker 1: work for you? If not, okay, cool, like onto the next,

576
00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:51,080
Speaker 1: thank you next? I mean, And the truth is is

577
00:28:51,120 --> 00:28:54,360
Speaker 1: if like you can approach it that way, you'll forget

578
00:28:54,400 --> 00:28:57,520
Speaker 1: about the nose as quickly as they come, because you'll

579
00:28:57,560 --> 00:29:01,720
Speaker 1: be willing to move on and make the next daring

580
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:04,560
Speaker 1: ask right, which is just an energy in general. Like

581
00:29:04,600 --> 00:29:06,280
Speaker 1: I'm a four on the Instagram, and so we get

582
00:29:06,280 --> 00:29:08,959
Speaker 1: really stuck in the one negative. Like I've always said that,

583
00:29:09,080 --> 00:29:13,240
Speaker 1: like about Instagram. If I got ten hundred amazing comments

584
00:29:13,320 --> 00:29:15,880
Speaker 1: but one negative, I could only remember the negative, and

585
00:29:15,880 --> 00:29:18,520
Speaker 1: that's just like no way to live. It's too harsh.

586
00:29:18,560 --> 00:29:26,440
Speaker 1: And I just you know, I'm numbers. You guys don't

587
00:29:26,440 --> 00:29:32,440
Speaker 1: even know what I'm capable of. Okay, I've been daring

588
00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:40,000
Speaker 1: all day, damn it, I would have noticed that last

589
00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:43,200
Speaker 1: time because I've been reading a text. Has she been

590
00:29:43,280 --> 00:29:47,400
Speaker 1: using wrong words this whole time? I really do this

591
00:29:47,440 --> 00:29:49,440
Speaker 1: all the time. I'm makeup ship, and I'm like, wait,

592
00:29:49,480 --> 00:29:54,840
Speaker 1: what is that mean? Anyway? I feel really good about

593
00:29:54,840 --> 00:29:59,200
Speaker 1: both of us. I feel great about both of our words.

594
00:29:59,240 --> 00:30:01,720
Speaker 1: I feel like they're great. Actually, I'm learning from yours too,

595
00:30:01,760 --> 00:30:05,600
Speaker 1: So keep me posting on that purpose, purposeful life. I'm

596
00:30:05,600 --> 00:30:08,160
Speaker 1: gonna keep daring greatly. Um, I'm gonna put it all

597
00:30:08,160 --> 00:30:12,400
Speaker 1: over my house, manifest that ship. Why don't you also

598
00:30:12,480 --> 00:30:15,480
Speaker 1: like operate at that high vibe dare vibe here at

599
00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:22,520
Speaker 1: com dare to Fly. We're flying. We're already flying's have flown,

600
00:30:23,680 --> 00:30:25,720
Speaker 1: all right. If you guys pick words, please send them

601
00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:27,880
Speaker 1: to us. At last year we got so many emails

602
00:30:27,960 --> 00:30:30,200
Speaker 1: saying what your word was. And just like when Chip

603
00:30:30,240 --> 00:30:31,800
Speaker 1: was telling me about his and I was telling him

604
00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:33,480
Speaker 1: about mine, and we're sharing them with you all, Like

605
00:30:33,560 --> 00:30:35,480
Speaker 1: it's inspiring to hear other people's too, and I think

606
00:30:35,480 --> 00:30:38,240
Speaker 1: it kind of puts the whole energy out there and

607
00:30:38,280 --> 00:30:40,880
Speaker 1: I love that. So please email us at the edge

608
00:30:40,880 --> 00:30:44,520
Speaker 1: at Velvet's Edge dot com. You can also also hit

609
00:30:44,600 --> 00:30:48,360
Speaker 1: us up on Instagram. I am at velvets Edge. Give

610
00:30:48,360 --> 00:30:52,040
Speaker 1: it to us in the new year at chip door

611
00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:56,040
Speaker 1: d O R s C eight. It's so much better

612
00:30:56,080 --> 00:31:00,040
Speaker 1: in with the microphone. Oh my god, do you a

613
00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:04,440
Speaker 1: powerful holding that microphone because usually you just hold um,

614
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:06,920
Speaker 1: you just have headphones and then are and then are

615
00:31:06,960 --> 00:31:09,800
Speaker 1: like it doesn't sound the same either. That was another

616
00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:11,920
Speaker 1: thing we were talking about, is like we need to

617
00:31:11,960 --> 00:31:14,200
Speaker 1: bow sound like we have microphones. Except I did not

618
00:31:14,320 --> 00:31:16,040
Speaker 1: remember how to set up this equipment because we have

619
00:31:16,120 --> 00:31:17,400
Speaker 1: not used it in so long, so it took me

620
00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:19,760
Speaker 1: a second. All right, Anyway, you guys, hit us up,

621
00:31:19,800 --> 00:31:22,240
Speaker 1: stay in touch in the new year. It's the edge

622
00:31:22,280 --> 00:31:25,920
Speaker 1: at Velvet edge dot com. And as you move into

623
00:31:25,960 --> 00:31:33,520
Speaker 1: this new year with purpose, with purpose, daring greatly see,

624
00:31:33,560 --> 00:31:36,840
Speaker 1: it's when you. It's when we add extra I hope

625
00:31:36,960 --> 00:31:40,120
Speaker 1: that you keep living on the edge and always remember

626
00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:44,480
Speaker 1: two that was really rusty. Give me a minute to

627
00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:47,040
Speaker 1: dare on that one. Okay, Bye,