WEBVTT - Mr. Stephen Baldwin: The Holy GILF

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<v Speaker 1>Misspelling with Tory Spelling, an iHeartRadio podcast.

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<v Speaker 2>Born on the Tory Spelling Show.

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<v Speaker 1>Do that's a good promo for my show?

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<v Speaker 2>Right?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah? Do you wrap? I could like freestyle?

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<v Speaker 2>No, I could never. Yeah, I'm not. I mean I could,

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<v Speaker 2>but it would you know, it would never be like

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<v Speaker 2>what's known today as real improvisationalal hip hop kind of thing.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, you know what I mean.

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<v Speaker 2>I get impersonate objective. I'm not rapping on your show, Tory,

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<v Speaker 2>and that's final. No.

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<v Speaker 1>I wasn't asking to. I was just curious if you could.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, you know what I've forgotten?

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<v Speaker 1>None, Paul's office.

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<v Speaker 2>I brought you a chocolate chip cookie. Do you eat

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<v Speaker 2>talks and cookies?

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<v Speaker 1>I will now from where?

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<v Speaker 2>Excellent, We're off to a great start from the commissary

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<v Speaker 2>place right on the corner.

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<v Speaker 1>That was so nice of you you were concerned about.

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<v Speaker 2>Looks like a really good trust. Grandpa, I know some things.

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<v Speaker 1>You are your grandfather.

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<v Speaker 2>Grandpa knows yummy anyway, he does.

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<v Speaker 1>I am a grandfather and no pun intended. That was good.

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<v Speaker 2>And my five year old granddaughter iris intergalactic. She's from

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<v Speaker 2>another galaxy.

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<v Speaker 1>So would you say you were the fun uncle before

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<v Speaker 1>you were grandpa.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but you know, as the youngest of the fellas,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm just one of the funny ones. Because everybody's funny,

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<v Speaker 2>that's right. Alec, Daniel, William and Steven are all funny

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<v Speaker 2>in their own right. Some are funnier than others, you know.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, clearly I like your humor.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, my humors like Bioa only.

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<v Speaker 1>With Alec as well. But you Alex funny. He's super funny. No,

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<v Speaker 1>he's beyond funny.

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<v Speaker 2>You have conversations with him where he does like you

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<v Speaker 2>like in them. We want to talk about spur of

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<v Speaker 2>the moment, wrapping, I'll be talking about something and Alyc

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<v Speaker 2>will start doing de Niro in the conversation, just with

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<v Speaker 2>the two of you, just to t it's very funny.

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<v Speaker 1>After all these years, you still find them funny.

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<v Speaker 2>You do. Uh. The funniest person I know is my wife.

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<v Speaker 2>Second funniest person I know is Alec Baldwin.

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<v Speaker 1>How is your wife funny in what ways?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, my wife's funny, like my mom was.

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<v Speaker 1>Mm hmm.

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<v Speaker 2>Like I'll give you an example, mm hmmmmmm. When I

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<v Speaker 2>was like fifteen and three quarters, I was in high school.

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<v Speaker 2>MS speak a Long Island, oh Ford g. Berner High School.

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<v Speaker 2>It's up to my peeps, class of eighty four.

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<v Speaker 1>Holy Oldie. That's a good rap name.

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<v Speaker 2>Holy Oldie. Well, I have my rap name already, and

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<v Speaker 2>I'll get back to that story. Okay, Holy Ghost DJ

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<v Speaker 2>he's the Holy Ghost, but I'm the djer. See how

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<v Speaker 2>there was what were we talking about?

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<v Speaker 1>You were fifteen and three quarters now fifteen and yeah, right, and.

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<v Speaker 2>I decided to get an earring. Okay, and I'm in

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<v Speaker 2>high school and like my dad's this football coach, very macho,

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<v Speaker 2>and the boys are playing sports and Alex, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>captain of the football team, and like everything's I'm in

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<v Speaker 2>like ninth grade. It's ninth grade, going into tenth grade

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<v Speaker 2>all that. You know, you can get your earners permit

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<v Speaker 2>to drive a car at sixteen in the state of

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<v Speaker 2>New York.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, fifteen year sixteen.

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<v Speaker 2>I stayed in New York, So I pierced my yearly

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<v Speaker 2>three weeks before. I need my mother's signature on the

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<v Speaker 2>document to get my learner's permit. So I get the

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<v Speaker 2>ear pierced. I come home and she had told me

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<v Speaker 2>in advance. You know, it wasn't a good idea. So

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<v Speaker 2>now I get home it's pierced. You know. I staid,

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<v Speaker 2>it's all good. You know, it's the gold ball thingy,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, the stick bind that you always get when

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<v Speaker 2>you get your first piercing. So I come home my wife,

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<v Speaker 2>see my wife. I stuck with my wife earlier. But

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<v Speaker 2>my mom goes, oh, honey, it just it's glistening. Take

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<v Speaker 2>it out, and I go no, She goes take it out.

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<v Speaker 2>It was one of those moments between a ninth grader

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<v Speaker 2>and his mom where she's like, or you'll see, is

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<v Speaker 2>what she said. If you don't take it out, you'll

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<v Speaker 2>see what's gonna happen. And well, yeah, exactly. But I

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<v Speaker 2>was a rascal tory. Go see so I did so

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<v Speaker 2>I didn't listen, and you know, and you know, kind

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<v Speaker 2>of dumber than a bag of rocks, the youngest Baldwin brother,

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<v Speaker 2>but talented in other ways. I come with the learner's

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<v Speaker 2>permit document. Hey mom, look you wanted to drive me.

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<v Speaker 2>You wanted to do that?

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<v Speaker 1>I could drive.

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<v Speaker 2>She goes take the earring out, like like Clemenza and

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<v Speaker 2>the Godfather, you know, leave the gun, take the canoli's.

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<v Speaker 2>You know what I'm saying. She goes, take the earring out.

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<v Speaker 2>I look at her now, horror comes over my my Psyche,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm sitting there going wouldn't be.

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<v Speaker 1>So absurd as to subject.

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<v Speaker 2>Suggests that I won't get you a seat. I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>that's blasphemous in some parental way. I'm like, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>I just I used every jazz move I could, and

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<v Speaker 2>she just looked at me like no, like a like

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<v Speaker 2>a truant officer. She looked at me when the hearing

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<v Speaker 2>and I'll sign the piece of paper, weeping like a

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<v Speaker 2>little tad ball, reluctantly. I removed the gold stud uh

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<v Speaker 2>from my ear and she signed the document and uh.

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<v Speaker 1>And he put it back in afterwards, right well, years later.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I had to wait forever. But what I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, that's mom sticking to her guns. Yeah, she whizz.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not that kind of mom landing the plane.

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<v Speaker 2>Now. My granddaughter Iris is very you know, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>take the earring out. She's very no nonsense, you know

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<v Speaker 2>what I mean. Like she likes a grape juice box

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<v Speaker 2>for example, that's her favorite. She doesn't like the punch

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<v Speaker 2>or the one that's like a Sunday lemonade with grapefruit. Yes, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>And she'll let you know the Grape at five years old.

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<v Speaker 2>I love it. It's the most fun I can have

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<v Speaker 2>other than the podcast now, which is amazing. I'm going

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<v Speaker 2>to shut up now, go ahead, no.

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<v Speaker 1>Keep going makes my job easy. Let's get some caffeine

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<v Speaker 1>in us.

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<v Speaker 2>So let's talk about you, okay for a minute, because

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<v Speaker 2>then we're going to talk to you later. That's gonna

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<v Speaker 2>be awesome.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm so excited meeting your podcast. One bad Movie The

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<v Speaker 1>Last Shark Nada. Oh, that's what that's going to be mine.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh you tell me what my one bad movie?

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<v Speaker 2>You were in that? Right, it's just an observation. You

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<v Speaker 2>were in The Last Shark?

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<v Speaker 1>Name was really a good friend?

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<v Speaker 2>Was it awesome?

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<v Speaker 1>Ah?

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<v Speaker 2>Do you even remember? I?

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<v Speaker 1>Of course I have a steel trap memory, just like you.

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<v Speaker 1>One of an elephants that's on me say sorry, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>I snort too. It was fun. It was with my

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<v Speaker 1>ex he played my husband in it. I remember we

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<v Speaker 1>were like fighting during that time.

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<v Speaker 2>So it was like it was it was a package deal.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it needed to be unpackaged. Yeah, and Iron had

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<v Speaker 1>asked us to do it, and so I was like.

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<v Speaker 2>What does that mean? An Iron controls Sharknado? Uh? I

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<v Speaker 2>am I'm popular again because of my podcast.

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<v Speaker 1>Probably again because of your daughter, and I will be.

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<v Speaker 2>Dang it in the name of one bad movie.

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<v Speaker 1>All it takes is one good movie or or bad.

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<v Speaker 2>That's the point.

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<v Speaker 1>Or bad rad.

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<v Speaker 2>Movies are really kind of getting a better deal. It's

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<v Speaker 2>creepy bad cult movies cashing in on the creepiness of

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<v Speaker 2>the one.

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<v Speaker 1>What's your worst movie?

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<v Speaker 2>Funny?

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<v Speaker 1>That's funny. We drink your caffeina, Like where this is going.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't think I should have any.

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<v Speaker 1>What's your worst movie in your opinion from my filmography?

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<v Speaker 1>I said, Yeah, is that what I said?

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<v Speaker 2>See, that's the point.

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<v Speaker 1>Like when I interview you, So we can't talk about

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<v Speaker 1>your movie because.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm about you, but I'm framing it for you. When

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<v Speaker 2>I interview, I'm going to chat with you. I'm gonna

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<v Speaker 2>ask you all kinds of creepy questions, but not the

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<v Speaker 2>creepy creepy ones, just kind of that's sad. Yeah, I asked,

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<v Speaker 2>like the safe creepy m But then I will say,

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<v Speaker 2>you pick your from your filmography. Yes, a film you

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<v Speaker 2>can talk about now because it's kind of goofy, corny

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<v Speaker 2>was twenty years ago, whatever it hot. Yeah, So hot.

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<v Speaker 2>You want to stir. You need a stir.

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<v Speaker 1>We didn't put in your If you stir it a

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<v Speaker 1>little bit, it gets less hot.

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<v Speaker 2>It cools it down. Grandpa knows things. Grandpa knows stuff.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, go back to your worst movie.

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<v Speaker 2>So you're going to invite you to select mine your

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<v Speaker 2>one dad movie.

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<v Speaker 1>I know I haven't. I'm not going to say it

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<v Speaker 1>on my for your body please, I know.

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<v Speaker 2>Thank you. You're so funny. But wait, here's what's funnier

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<v Speaker 2>about you being so funny? Yes, it's the everyone like

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<v Speaker 2>if you say Alex funny, now it's because of thirty

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<v Speaker 2>rock kind of of other things.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, he's just funny. Is that where you were going?

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<v Speaker 2>He has the gift of funny? So do you so?

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<v Speaker 1>Do you? So? Do you so?

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<v Speaker 2>I say, we throw down a gauntlet right here on.

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<v Speaker 1>Your pod.

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<v Speaker 2>For example, like I have an idea for a series,

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<v Speaker 2>like a half hour sitcom. You know what that's like? Okay,

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<v Speaker 2>so what if I were a guy now like this

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<v Speaker 2>in the tradition of the now kind of hipster pastors, Yes,

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<v Speaker 2>stay with me. You're not going to believe this idea,

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<v Speaker 2>But if you say yes right now, it's sealed on

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<v Speaker 2>this digital and then we'll just see if it makes sense.

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<v Speaker 2>See it makes sense. Good, that's perfect, that's great. That's

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<v Speaker 2>the artist in you. So what if there was a

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<v Speaker 2>show where Stephen Baldwin liked this was a pastor who

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<v Speaker 2>just retired. Okay, so now he was this guy this

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<v Speaker 2>way in public with his perfect pastor trophy wife. And

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<v Speaker 2>then the pilot episode is, you know, the morning after

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<v Speaker 2>the retirement party.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, so it's the first day.

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<v Speaker 2>Of his afterlife, get it? Yeah, afterlife.

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<v Speaker 1>I love puns.

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<v Speaker 2>So imagine a sitcom where a guy like me was like,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, like it's still the official kind of like

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<v Speaker 2>we would talk about you know, well, listen, it's been

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<v Speaker 2>this and it's been that, but you'd speed up from

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<v Speaker 2>the pilot who they really are behind the scenes.

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<v Speaker 1>I like this idea.

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<v Speaker 2>It's called the Afterlife, and you're forget it, beyond perfect

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<v Speaker 2>to be my wife on the show.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm honored, you're perfect.

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<v Speaker 2>So this is kind of like an idea where independently

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<v Speaker 2>we could probably get funding for it very quickly.

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<v Speaker 1>I always say that it doesn't happen well well with you.

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<v Speaker 2>AT's been hanging out with Grandpa.

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<v Speaker 1>You get shit done well.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm a little ghosted. So when I when I think

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<v Speaker 2>about something and I focus God willing, it gets manifested.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh you're ghosted personally? Yeah, not publicly.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, I talk about it a little bit, which I

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<v Speaker 2>really shouldn't. Everyone's telling me to stop talking about my

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<v Speaker 2>creepy stuff, which is my Christianity, but I am. I'm stopping.

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<v Speaker 1>But that's part of who you are.

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<v Speaker 2>I know. Jamie Kennedy loves it. Like he asked me

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<v Speaker 2>like all kinds of creepy Christian questions and I answered

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<v Speaker 2>them like according to the Bible, and he really freaks out.

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<v Speaker 1>Nice.

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<v Speaker 2>So when are we going to church?

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<v Speaker 1>Just kidding, I'll go to church with you. You would to

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<v Speaker 1>get into character?

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<v Speaker 2>Perfect?

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<v Speaker 1>Great, done, and we're gone. Why am I perfect for it?

0:14:14.559 --> 0:14:15.800
<v Speaker 1>I remind you of your wife?

0:14:16.600 --> 0:14:22.480
<v Speaker 2>No, you remind me of somebody who understands the reality

0:14:22.920 --> 0:14:33.680
<v Speaker 2>of the difference between bullshit Hollywood and uh being a human. Yeah,

0:14:33.760 --> 0:14:35.200
<v Speaker 2>you're one of the survivors.

0:14:37.240 --> 0:14:39.160
<v Speaker 1>It's like a mega plane crash. We're here.

0:14:39.320 --> 0:14:44.960
<v Speaker 2>Well, kudos to you. Some people achieve all different levels

0:14:45.000 --> 0:14:48.960
<v Speaker 2>of experience and success. Look at my daughter. I never

0:14:48.960 --> 0:14:53.680
<v Speaker 2>talk about her, but my daughter has done the impossible

0:14:54.200 --> 0:14:57.240
<v Speaker 2>relatively But in this day and age, in the last

0:14:57.240 --> 0:15:00.440
<v Speaker 2>ten years. It's not impossible. It's happened. It's like these

0:15:00.520 --> 0:15:03.160
<v Speaker 2>kinds of successes are happening. This is true, and young

0:15:03.200 --> 0:15:09.560
<v Speaker 2>people are making unbelievable amounts of money on the internet

0:15:09.720 --> 0:15:13.360
<v Speaker 2>in ways that are very sketchy.

0:15:13.920 --> 0:15:17.080
<v Speaker 1>So God bless her sketchy? Why sketchy?

0:15:17.840 --> 0:15:19.960
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, I can't let this conversation go there.

0:15:21.360 --> 0:15:24.840
<v Speaker 2>Just I think there's a lot of young people exposing

0:15:24.880 --> 0:15:27.960
<v Speaker 2>themselves in private chat rooms and getting paid a lot

0:15:27.960 --> 0:15:28.680
<v Speaker 2>of money to do it.

0:15:29.200 --> 0:15:33.160
<v Speaker 1>Can you find out this chat room? Only my tool.

0:15:33.000 --> 0:15:36.000
<v Speaker 2>For that after the show? Get it? Only after the show?

0:15:36.080 --> 0:15:36.400
<v Speaker 2>Get it?

0:15:39.320 --> 0:15:40.720
<v Speaker 1>Do you think I should be on only fans?

0:15:42.360 --> 0:15:45.080
<v Speaker 2>Hey? Man, it's free country, dude. I'd like to be

0:15:45.120 --> 0:15:51.320
<v Speaker 2>your number win for subscriber. No, No, I don't think

0:15:51.360 --> 0:15:54.840
<v Speaker 2>you should. No, but I'm thinking about doing it. Shut up.

0:15:55.200 --> 0:15:59.360
<v Speaker 1>But just for my feet, that's a whole dude.

0:15:59.400 --> 0:16:01.040
<v Speaker 2>You know much money you could make if you just did.

0:16:01.360 --> 0:16:03.200
<v Speaker 1>I have great feet. I've been considering it.

0:16:04.280 --> 0:16:07.400
<v Speaker 2>If you do feet first, if you go feed first, yeah,

0:16:07.440 --> 0:16:09.040
<v Speaker 2>I'll do I will do my feet.

0:16:09.120 --> 0:16:10.280
<v Speaker 1>Wait, can we do it too?

0:16:10.320 --> 0:16:14.840
<v Speaker 2>For I don't know how the only thing works? Meaning

0:16:15.240 --> 0:16:17.800
<v Speaker 2>I wonder if they do like special events.

0:16:18.560 --> 0:16:21.400
<v Speaker 1>We could be the first.

0:16:21.840 --> 0:16:25.520
<v Speaker 2>All right, I'm joking, where's the camera? Honey, I'm kidding.

0:16:26.320 --> 0:16:29.840
<v Speaker 2>I warned you. It's story. She's gotta play my wife

0:16:29.840 --> 0:16:31.640
<v Speaker 2>now and then after like my wife knows exactly what

0:16:31.680 --> 0:16:34.160
<v Speaker 2>the afterlife is. You know why why I could be

0:16:34.160 --> 0:16:35.600
<v Speaker 2>in the kitchen somewhere and like, you know, I'll say

0:16:35.600 --> 0:16:37.400
<v Speaker 2>to her, like, where's my steak? I thought I had

0:16:37.440 --> 0:16:39.040
<v Speaker 2>like six more rounds of my steak. She'd be sitting

0:16:39.040 --> 0:16:42.240
<v Speaker 2>there like why you know she ate my food? You

0:16:42.240 --> 0:16:47.720
<v Speaker 2>know she we're together thirty nine years. I'm with this woman.

0:16:48.040 --> 0:16:49.000
<v Speaker 1>This is insane.

0:16:49.160 --> 0:16:51.920
<v Speaker 2>He knows me, I know her. But now we're at

0:16:51.960 --> 0:16:58.040
<v Speaker 2>this phase. Yes, where where are you going? It's basically like,

0:16:58.040 --> 0:16:59.320
<v Speaker 2>you know, we're not going anywhere.

0:17:00.200 --> 0:17:04.440
<v Speaker 1>We're together, Yeah, but it's it's.

0:17:04.680 --> 0:17:09.840
<v Speaker 2>Mostly because she put up with you. Well, yeah, she's

0:17:10.080 --> 0:17:14.760
<v Speaker 2>I mean, she's a saint. She's literally a saint. But

0:17:14.840 --> 0:17:17.399
<v Speaker 2>she likes but Tori, she likes my sense of humor.

0:17:18.920 --> 0:17:21.200
<v Speaker 1>She still laughs at you thirty nine years later.

0:17:21.440 --> 0:17:25.359
<v Speaker 2>No, nine five percent of the time she just rolls

0:17:25.359 --> 0:17:29.800
<v Speaker 2>her eyes. Okay, that five percent, Oh, that's the I

0:17:30.119 --> 0:17:37.000
<v Speaker 2>stinger with comedyot but truth be told, she'll come back

0:17:37.200 --> 0:17:43.280
<v Speaker 2>with I mean, like dropping a piano on my head.

0:17:44.960 --> 0:17:48.760
<v Speaker 2>The comebacks now are are tenfold, ten times ten x.

0:17:49.080 --> 0:17:50.040
<v Speaker 1>Was she always that funny?

0:17:50.960 --> 0:17:56.080
<v Speaker 2>No, she's funnier now with age, which is precious because

0:17:56.119 --> 0:17:58.360
<v Speaker 2>I need that. I need like, you know, don't don't

0:17:58.400 --> 0:18:00.520
<v Speaker 2>let it get to have you crazy?

0:18:00.560 --> 0:18:03.000
<v Speaker 1>And how do you not want a relationship?

0:18:03.040 --> 0:18:03.440
<v Speaker 2>Get there?

0:18:03.640 --> 0:18:05.439
<v Speaker 1>Like what's the trick?

0:18:06.680 --> 0:18:12.200
<v Speaker 2>Okay? So everybody says to me Stephen Baldwin, youngest of

0:18:12.240 --> 0:18:17.600
<v Speaker 2>the Baldwin brothers, Cuckoo, Biodome, half Baked, some other good ones,

0:18:17.720 --> 0:18:23.280
<v Speaker 2>but mostly goofy. I'm known for my goofy. So a

0:18:23.359 --> 0:18:26.480
<v Speaker 2>lot of young people say, wow, like what's your secret?

0:18:26.840 --> 0:18:29.600
<v Speaker 2>Like that's like, no, seriously, Like you're married thirty five

0:18:29.680 --> 0:18:34.240
<v Speaker 2>years and know when you raised two kids pretty dang

0:18:34.280 --> 0:18:37.560
<v Speaker 2>good and you know, the outcomes pretty fabulous and God

0:18:37.680 --> 0:18:40.840
<v Speaker 2>is good and all that stuff, But like, what's your

0:18:40.880 --> 0:18:44.320
<v Speaker 2>secret for the marital thing? So here's here's the trip,

0:18:46.119 --> 0:18:49.640
<v Speaker 2>and this is where the faith comes in the one

0:18:49.680 --> 0:18:53.359
<v Speaker 2>word And I make young people guess, Like these four

0:18:53.400 --> 0:18:57.159
<v Speaker 2>over here, I could say if I said that's the

0:18:57.200 --> 0:19:01.480
<v Speaker 2>one word, that's the most important word for a what

0:19:01.520 --> 0:19:04.359
<v Speaker 2>do you say marriage, just a long term relationship. If

0:19:04.400 --> 0:19:06.919
<v Speaker 2>you if you had to put into one word the

0:19:07.000 --> 0:19:10.200
<v Speaker 2>thing to focus on that you'll need to remember that's

0:19:10.240 --> 0:19:15.240
<v Speaker 2>the thing that like will cause the longevity of a relationship.

0:19:15.440 --> 0:19:18.120
<v Speaker 2>What's the one word? Ready, go, everybody's thinking a word.

0:19:19.240 --> 0:19:23.359
<v Speaker 2>So here's the word. I'll save us time. Forgiveness. You

0:19:23.640 --> 0:19:29.160
<v Speaker 2>say faith, right, but not trust, not love, not unconditional loved.

0:19:30.680 --> 0:19:38.560
<v Speaker 2>Because what what what causes the separation is when you

0:19:38.560 --> 0:19:40.760
<v Speaker 2>know the garden of Eden, they're you know, dodt of

0:19:40.760 --> 0:19:44.720
<v Speaker 2>this tree. So you know the difference of good and evil? Right,

0:19:45.520 --> 0:19:49.960
<v Speaker 2>So now the devil can come in and cause interruptions

0:19:50.040 --> 0:19:52.840
<v Speaker 2>that if you just keep thinking, okay, I have forgive

0:19:53.040 --> 0:19:58.199
<v Speaker 2>this person in the situation biblically almost no matter what

0:19:58.240 --> 0:20:02.560
<v Speaker 2>it is, like literally almost like so like here's the

0:20:02.600 --> 0:20:05.760
<v Speaker 2>seguay to comedy. So literally, my wife gets born again

0:20:05.880 --> 0:20:08.959
<v Speaker 2>like a year before I do, in like two thousand

0:20:08.960 --> 0:20:09.280
<v Speaker 2>and two.

0:20:09.440 --> 0:20:12.240
<v Speaker 1>Okay, she starts reading.

0:20:12.000 --> 0:20:13.600
<v Speaker 2>The Bible every day. She still reads it every day

0:20:14.160 --> 0:20:19.439
<v Speaker 2>two hours a day. Wow, is she gnarly? So she

0:20:19.560 --> 0:20:22.080
<v Speaker 2>literally comes in the room one day I'm working. She

0:20:22.280 --> 0:20:24.800
<v Speaker 2>literally comes in the room one day she goes, I

0:20:24.840 --> 0:20:27.760
<v Speaker 2>can't believe it. I go, what's going on? She goes,

0:20:28.200 --> 0:20:30.399
<v Speaker 2>Oh no, I just this is incredible. I go what

0:20:30.480 --> 0:20:36.560
<v Speaker 2>She goes, I can't divorce you. I go, okay, okay, Honie,

0:20:37.200 --> 0:20:40.800
<v Speaker 2>great fantastic. What are you talking about? You know? I

0:20:40.840 --> 0:20:43.320
<v Speaker 2>just read this particular scripture in the New Testament here

0:20:43.800 --> 0:20:46.320
<v Speaker 2>and it literally says that, like I mean, unless you

0:20:46.359 --> 0:20:48.440
<v Speaker 2>do like a couple of things like seven or eight

0:20:48.480 --> 0:20:50.920
<v Speaker 2>or nine or ten, eleven, twelve times. But then it's

0:20:50.920 --> 0:20:52.879
<v Speaker 2>like grounds for me to go to the leadership of

0:20:52.920 --> 0:20:55.040
<v Speaker 2>my church and like you know, sit down and like

0:20:55.080 --> 0:20:59.000
<v Speaker 2>write a doctrine with that, like it's this whole. So

0:20:59.080 --> 0:21:02.640
<v Speaker 2>I turn around, like, bit, I think this Jesus guy

0:21:02.720 --> 0:21:06.000
<v Speaker 2>is a good dude. I think this is working out

0:21:06.000 --> 0:21:09.400
<v Speaker 2>between you and him. It's okay to continue your spiritual

0:21:09.480 --> 0:21:15.200
<v Speaker 2>boyfriend Jay. But then a year later I freaked out,

0:21:15.200 --> 0:21:18.320
<v Speaker 2>which was right after nine to eleven, So the year

0:21:18.480 --> 0:21:23.639
<v Speaker 2>before that was that's when he and my wife got

0:21:24.200 --> 0:21:26.720
<v Speaker 2>born again. And then right after nine eleven I got

0:21:26.760 --> 0:21:29.280
<v Speaker 2>born again. After she was just Jesus freakd it and

0:21:29.320 --> 0:21:31.399
<v Speaker 2>told me I get to borce you. So I was like,

0:21:32.800 --> 0:21:37.600
<v Speaker 2>but then holy ghost for you. Yes, that was a

0:21:37.600 --> 0:21:41.960
<v Speaker 2>good year. That was the year of the ghosting wife.

0:21:42.000 --> 0:21:45.000
<v Speaker 2>You got ghosted, then I got ghosted. But then I

0:21:45.280 --> 0:21:45.960
<v Speaker 2>freaked out.

0:21:47.520 --> 0:21:50.040
<v Speaker 1>I kind of went, I just got it. I just

0:21:50.080 --> 0:21:53.280
<v Speaker 1>got it. Sorry, I know quick.

0:21:53.320 --> 0:21:55.560
<v Speaker 2>That's how it happens too, that's so cool. Then you

0:21:55.600 --> 0:22:02.119
<v Speaker 2>get the download. Who So then I kind of became

0:22:02.240 --> 0:22:07.440
<v Speaker 2>very public about my faith and my politics. And then

0:22:07.680 --> 0:22:08.840
<v Speaker 2>five years ago kind.

0:22:08.640 --> 0:22:12.600
<v Speaker 1>Of how'd that go for you? Uh?

0:22:13.359 --> 0:22:15.560
<v Speaker 2>Well, I just think for what I want to do,

0:22:15.680 --> 0:22:19.280
<v Speaker 2>it didn't go for me, meaning meaning I just I'm

0:22:19.320 --> 0:22:21.560
<v Speaker 2>not the right personality for that stuff.

0:22:21.880 --> 0:22:24.480
<v Speaker 1>I'm not a fine Are we talking about now?

0:22:24.520 --> 0:22:25.119
<v Speaker 2>Politics?

0:22:25.400 --> 0:22:28.880
<v Speaker 1>Okay, I was talking about public perception when you went

0:22:28.880 --> 0:22:29.600
<v Speaker 1>through all of this.

0:22:29.800 --> 0:22:33.520
<v Speaker 2>Well that too. First if you support a political candidate,

0:22:34.040 --> 0:22:38.240
<v Speaker 2>now it becomes a very focused part of your world

0:22:38.480 --> 0:22:41.639
<v Speaker 2>on the outside. Like I was saying, for what I

0:22:41.640 --> 0:22:43.640
<v Speaker 2>want to do now, which is my little podcast, and

0:22:43.680 --> 0:22:47.480
<v Speaker 2>I'm become a producer, writer, director, I've been called just

0:22:47.520 --> 0:22:51.880
<v Speaker 2>to pray for all those things. See God, it's good.

0:22:52.280 --> 0:22:53.720
<v Speaker 2>So now I don't have to go brick ap breck

0:22:53.760 --> 0:22:58.400
<v Speaker 2>a fire crackers, this schoomba Devin Gavin Gavin Gavin rah

0:22:58.520 --> 0:22:59.359
<v Speaker 2>rah rah.

0:23:00.160 --> 0:23:02.200
<v Speaker 1>Do you think publicly it doesn't matter now what you do.

0:23:03.640 --> 0:23:07.280
<v Speaker 2>No, and that matters more than ever. But I think

0:23:07.400 --> 0:23:11.560
<v Speaker 2>at my age and in my experience, and I think

0:23:11.600 --> 0:23:14.159
<v Speaker 2>for folks like us who really have been in the

0:23:14.200 --> 0:23:19.400
<v Speaker 2>game hard and succeeded. Now's really you know, I'm fifty nine.

0:23:19.520 --> 0:23:22.600
<v Speaker 2>You know I got twenty five years to fuck this

0:23:22.880 --> 0:23:32.560
<v Speaker 2>town up with my creativity. So what do I mean

0:23:32.600 --> 0:23:36.040
<v Speaker 2>by that? When you and I win our Emmys for

0:23:36.080 --> 0:23:41.439
<v Speaker 2>The Afterlife? Okay, just because we said, let's get paid

0:23:42.240 --> 0:23:45.399
<v Speaker 2>to do what we do well with great writing. But

0:23:45.600 --> 0:23:48.080
<v Speaker 2>we do it and we own it. You can still

0:23:48.080 --> 0:23:54.200
<v Speaker 2>win an Emmy that way, developing and owning stuff. In theory, absolutely,

0:23:54.440 --> 0:23:58.280
<v Speaker 2>we could be like these little streamer people. We could start.

0:23:58.119 --> 0:23:59.520
<v Speaker 1>Streaming way to go.

0:23:59.760 --> 0:24:04.440
<v Speaker 2>Yeah aah, Netflix. They don't suck, They're pretty good. They're

0:24:04.440 --> 0:24:05.680
<v Speaker 2>seemed to be doing something right.

0:24:06.520 --> 0:24:07.080
<v Speaker 1>I'll do that.

0:24:07.240 --> 0:24:10.840
<v Speaker 2>Well, let me tell you just the cameras is my camera. Listen,

0:24:10.920 --> 0:24:15.520
<v Speaker 2>mister owner and Netflix. The bidding war starts now for

0:24:15.600 --> 0:24:20.760
<v Speaker 2>the new show with me and misspelling and no shenanigans.

0:24:20.800 --> 0:24:23.120
<v Speaker 1>You forget my name for a second because we're ghosted.

0:24:24.400 --> 0:24:25.320
<v Speaker 2>What did you.

0:24:25.280 --> 0:24:26.479
<v Speaker 1>Forget my name for a second?

0:24:27.080 --> 0:24:28.960
<v Speaker 2>No, I like saying, well, I'm talking business so I

0:24:29.040 --> 0:24:31.760
<v Speaker 2>refer to you as Misspelling's the.

0:24:31.720 --> 0:24:35.480
<v Speaker 1>Same with the pod too. It made me feel weird inside.

0:24:37.640 --> 0:24:42.359
<v Speaker 2>Toy. You named the podcast here, I did, Yeah, and

0:24:42.400 --> 0:24:43.600
<v Speaker 2>I think it's fabulous, funny.

0:24:43.600 --> 0:24:51.600
<v Speaker 1>Thank you.

0:24:51.600 --> 0:24:54.280
<v Speaker 2>You know you just got the holy ghost thing. Do

0:24:54.320 --> 0:24:57.440
<v Speaker 2>you realize I was talking to my people earlier. Yes,

0:24:57.760 --> 0:25:01.000
<v Speaker 2>and I went misspelling and and I finally got the

0:25:01.080 --> 0:25:01.800
<v Speaker 2>name of the show.

0:25:01.960 --> 0:25:08.719
<v Speaker 1>Like what miss hating? That's me made co writers?

0:25:08.720 --> 0:25:09.040
<v Speaker 2>Do you know?

0:25:10.160 --> 0:25:10.800
<v Speaker 1>I don't know?

0:25:11.280 --> 0:25:13.560
<v Speaker 2>Sure you do? Do you know what? Well?

0:25:13.600 --> 0:25:17.200
<v Speaker 1>You know what else we should do right now, right now?

0:25:17.800 --> 0:25:20.120
<v Speaker 2>You know, like when you do these creepy reality shows

0:25:20.119 --> 0:25:22.440
<v Speaker 2>where you have to like like I did Celebrity.

0:25:21.960 --> 0:25:25.280
<v Speaker 1>Apprentice, I know you did. I don't know what you

0:25:25.320 --> 0:25:25.760
<v Speaker 1>did on it.

0:25:25.800 --> 0:25:29.720
<v Speaker 2>I justly partner with you. I got fire twice twice.

0:25:29.760 --> 0:25:33.360
<v Speaker 2>I got fire before Gary Busey. Okay, you may want

0:25:33.400 --> 0:25:34.320
<v Speaker 2>me to leave right now.

0:25:34.400 --> 0:25:38.920
<v Speaker 1>I forgot com on for TV gold. Yeah you get it,

0:25:38.960 --> 0:25:39.399
<v Speaker 1>of course.

0:25:39.920 --> 0:25:44.200
<v Speaker 2>Yes, So I'm going to start a bidding war now,

0:25:44.840 --> 0:25:47.920
<v Speaker 2>okay for our new hit TV show that doesn't exist, Joe,

0:25:48.359 --> 0:25:49.480
<v Speaker 2>but you were just yourself.

0:25:49.840 --> 0:25:54.600
<v Speaker 1>It's like Crypto. I know nothing about Crypto. I've never

0:25:54.680 --> 0:25:56.400
<v Speaker 1>done like any of that bitcoin and whatever.

0:25:56.560 --> 0:25:57.360
<v Speaker 2>Don't change his thing?

0:25:57.720 --> 0:26:00.600
<v Speaker 1>Is really why it?

0:26:00.680 --> 0:26:01.680
<v Speaker 2>And don't change a thing?

0:26:02.119 --> 0:26:02.479
<v Speaker 1>Okay?

0:26:02.680 --> 0:26:08.879
<v Speaker 2>Know what the crypto gs like? Cryptos sketchy unless you

0:26:08.920 --> 0:26:11.960
<v Speaker 2>know what you're doing. And I don't think anybody should

0:26:11.960 --> 0:26:16.480
<v Speaker 2>ever invest in anything unless they understand it. Okay, Yeah,

0:26:16.600 --> 0:26:20.199
<v Speaker 2>so you and I should invest in a library of

0:26:20.359 --> 0:26:21.920
<v Speaker 2>content in the future.

0:26:24.440 --> 0:26:25.080
<v Speaker 1>How do you do that?

0:26:25.800 --> 0:26:27.800
<v Speaker 2>What say it again?

0:26:31.240 --> 0:26:34.360
<v Speaker 1>A library of content in the future. But if it's

0:26:34.440 --> 0:26:36.400
<v Speaker 1>the future, how do we buy into it now?

0:26:37.880 --> 0:26:42.640
<v Speaker 2>Well? You do this podcast? Yes, and from this podcast,

0:26:42.760 --> 0:26:44.439
<v Speaker 2>lots of other branding could happen.

0:26:44.600 --> 0:26:45.320
<v Speaker 1>That'd be nice.

0:26:46.720 --> 0:26:50.280
<v Speaker 2>A Miss Tory could become a brand in its own right.

0:26:50.760 --> 0:26:52.320
<v Speaker 1>I think I am right?

0:26:53.119 --> 0:26:57.280
<v Speaker 2>But off the podcast could be a store.

0:26:58.440 --> 0:27:00.600
<v Speaker 1>Sure of Britain mortar doesn't work anymore.

0:27:01.280 --> 0:27:02.399
<v Speaker 2>I didn't say bricking more, you.

0:27:02.440 --> 0:27:06.479
<v Speaker 1>Said a store. Oh the store front?

0:27:07.880 --> 0:27:11.840
<v Speaker 2>Go full digital toy. I'm trying, you go, girl.

0:27:11.960 --> 0:27:13.840
<v Speaker 1>It's hard to break into the world.

0:27:13.840 --> 0:27:17.879
<v Speaker 2>Into the major Do you produce stuff?

0:27:18.080 --> 0:27:21.960
<v Speaker 1>I do? I typically end up creating my own stuff

0:27:21.960 --> 0:27:23.639
<v Speaker 1>because I don't get cast into stuff.

0:27:24.680 --> 0:27:27.000
<v Speaker 2>Right, So you do? What do you produce that you

0:27:27.000 --> 0:27:27.760
<v Speaker 2>put yourself in?

0:27:28.440 --> 0:27:29.600
<v Speaker 1>My own TV shows?

0:27:29.960 --> 0:27:30.200
<v Speaker 2>Right?

0:27:30.400 --> 0:27:30.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

0:27:31.080 --> 0:27:33.160
<v Speaker 2>Movies of the week or series.

0:27:33.359 --> 0:27:34.800
<v Speaker 1>Scripted and non scripted.

0:27:35.880 --> 0:27:38.399
<v Speaker 2>Oh okay, how long you've been doing that?

0:27:40.280 --> 0:27:41.240
<v Speaker 1>Twenty years?

0:27:41.960 --> 0:27:46.040
<v Speaker 2>So if you liked an idea like, yeah, playing my

0:27:46.119 --> 0:27:50.560
<v Speaker 2>wife that's a former pastor's wife. Yes, and we found

0:27:50.640 --> 0:27:55.320
<v Speaker 2>because here's here's the thing. I'm gonna say this wrong

0:27:55.440 --> 0:27:57.960
<v Speaker 2>to say it right, okay, but if we find the

0:27:58.080 --> 0:28:03.679
<v Speaker 2>right writers. Yes, I'm gonna say it wrong to say right.

0:28:03.800 --> 0:28:08.000
<v Speaker 2>So almost like South Park writers. Yes, because you want

0:28:08.040 --> 0:28:10.879
<v Speaker 2>it to be real, Yeah, you want it to be

0:28:10.920 --> 0:28:16.879
<v Speaker 2>a little naughty, but not past pg thirteen. Most of

0:28:16.920 --> 0:28:20.719
<v Speaker 2>the Batman feature films are pg. Thirteen just for that

0:28:20.880 --> 0:28:23.720
<v Speaker 2>requirement of language and violence.

0:28:23.280 --> 0:28:26.639
<v Speaker 1>And that's hard to keep it there and still thrive

0:28:26.720 --> 0:28:27.120
<v Speaker 1>at home.

0:28:27.560 --> 0:28:32.919
<v Speaker 2>But here's the point. Yeah, there's a great scene, and

0:28:33.040 --> 0:28:37.800
<v Speaker 2>everybody loves Raymond where you know, he's the good guy.

0:28:37.840 --> 0:28:41.000
<v Speaker 2>He's Italian. This sad and he's got the wife that's

0:28:41.040 --> 0:28:43.440
<v Speaker 2>smarter than him and helps him figure it out and

0:28:43.480 --> 0:28:47.400
<v Speaker 2>he struggles and right, Yes, So they're going to bed

0:28:47.560 --> 0:28:49.280
<v Speaker 2>and she's sitting there and she's got her cute little

0:28:49.320 --> 0:28:52.880
<v Speaker 2>slip onto like the conservative thing, and she's adorable, and

0:28:52.960 --> 0:28:56.400
<v Speaker 2>he's there. Ray's got his whole pajamas on, and Ray's

0:28:56.520 --> 0:29:01.880
<v Speaker 2>very formal, very nervous, very ray. And she says, did

0:29:01.920 --> 0:29:07.200
<v Speaker 2>you forget you owe me a neck rub? And he goes, oh,

0:29:07.760 --> 0:29:09.640
<v Speaker 2>they're getting ready for bed. It's the end of the show.

0:29:09.640 --> 0:29:11.880
<v Speaker 2>It's the end of the episode. And he gets behind

0:29:11.880 --> 0:29:13.920
<v Speaker 2>her on his knees and she's sitting up kind of awkward,

0:29:13.960 --> 0:29:17.320
<v Speaker 2>and he starts rubbing her shoulders like this, and he's

0:29:17.360 --> 0:29:20.800
<v Speaker 2>going like this, and she goes, you're not gonna make it,

0:29:20.840 --> 0:29:25.320
<v Speaker 2>are you, And he goes, no, not. He turns the

0:29:25.400 --> 0:29:30.160
<v Speaker 2>light up so they can make love. But you know,

0:29:30.240 --> 0:29:35.760
<v Speaker 2>it's just that cute, funny comedy. It's like that. Yeah,

0:29:35.840 --> 0:29:43.440
<v Speaker 2>So it's more like the differences in the arguments a

0:29:43.520 --> 0:29:47.680
<v Speaker 2>couple might have if their public persona is X. And

0:29:47.760 --> 0:29:51.000
<v Speaker 2>once that's been removed, once he's retired as the pastor,

0:29:51.640 --> 0:29:53.959
<v Speaker 2>that means the same people that came up to him

0:29:54.000 --> 0:29:56.800
<v Speaker 2>at Walmart to go, hey, see you Sunday don't do

0:29:56.880 --> 0:30:00.640
<v Speaker 2>that anymore. So now he has to experience like, hey, Tori,

0:30:00.760 --> 0:30:04.840
<v Speaker 2>good to see and you're like, oh, hey, it's that awkwardness.

0:30:05.040 --> 0:30:06.080
<v Speaker 1>Now I understand.

0:30:06.080 --> 0:30:09.080
<v Speaker 2>There is no that's funny.

0:30:09.360 --> 0:30:09.959
<v Speaker 1>That's funny.

0:30:10.480 --> 0:30:13.160
<v Speaker 2>I think it's funny. And then there's all the things

0:30:13.280 --> 0:30:15.320
<v Speaker 2>you can address now that he's retired.

0:30:15.840 --> 0:30:18.200
<v Speaker 1>Imagine if you had a list, that'd be great.

0:30:18.240 --> 0:30:22.240
<v Speaker 2>That one assistant there was skirts were a little too short.

0:30:23.000 --> 0:30:25.440
<v Speaker 2>What I got rid of her quick? See that's the line,

0:30:25.800 --> 0:30:29.520
<v Speaker 2>I did what you told me. It took six weeks. No, no,

0:30:29.520 --> 0:30:32.560
<v Speaker 2>no, no no. Her mother was sick and there's a lot

0:30:32.600 --> 0:30:32.880
<v Speaker 2>of that.

0:30:33.440 --> 0:30:36.320
<v Speaker 1>Are you talking prime time? Then? Is that even? Does

0:30:36.360 --> 0:30:37.640
<v Speaker 1>that word exists anymore?

0:30:38.360 --> 0:30:42.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah? This could be. It could be ABC, NBC. Is

0:30:42.800 --> 0:30:45.920
<v Speaker 2>you're still a CBS? Yes, okay, I don't even I

0:30:45.920 --> 0:30:46.560
<v Speaker 2>don't even know.

0:30:46.720 --> 0:30:51.080
<v Speaker 1>Someone take it away and they're still fun.

0:30:51.040 --> 0:31:00.680
<v Speaker 2>Less moon vess the old days, Oh, the old days.

0:31:01.280 --> 0:31:05.360
<v Speaker 2>So look look ahead, you're gonna no, no, no, you're

0:31:05.920 --> 0:31:08.080
<v Speaker 2>dang it. I saw it all face.

0:31:11.080 --> 0:31:13.760
<v Speaker 1>I'll remember. I'll come back to it. And like the

0:31:13.840 --> 0:31:17.479
<v Speaker 1>other four stories that you divert had never came back to.

0:31:19.560 --> 0:31:23.719
<v Speaker 2>Really was therefore that there was maybe one? I think

0:31:23.760 --> 0:31:26.480
<v Speaker 2>I landed all the planes quite frankly.

0:31:26.320 --> 0:31:28.640
<v Speaker 1>He did. I still want to go back to the

0:31:28.640 --> 0:31:29.080
<v Speaker 1>foot thing.

0:31:30.120 --> 0:31:32.680
<v Speaker 2>Okay, I'm into it. Can I see if you go

0:31:32.840 --> 0:31:33.600
<v Speaker 2>only fans?

0:31:34.040 --> 0:31:37.520
<v Speaker 1>No, there's a special site for this.

0:31:38.680 --> 0:31:39.480
<v Speaker 2>Is it only feet?

0:31:40.240 --> 0:31:43.040
<v Speaker 1>No, it's a cloder.

0:31:43.880 --> 0:31:47.120
<v Speaker 2>Okay, hold on, see it, see it? Like I told you,

0:31:47.200 --> 0:31:52.040
<v Speaker 2>I was kind of full of bys here right like

0:31:52.120 --> 0:31:56.800
<v Speaker 2>I talked, I mean, but I'm really just a grandpa.

0:31:57.680 --> 0:32:00.360
<v Speaker 2>So hold on. What's it called again?

0:32:00.960 --> 0:32:02.120
<v Speaker 1>Feet finder?

0:32:04.520 --> 0:32:07.880
<v Speaker 2>I'm about to really lose it right now? And is

0:32:07.920 --> 0:32:12.600
<v Speaker 2>this a like only whatever? But like people can pay

0:32:12.960 --> 0:32:14.480
<v Speaker 2>yes to watch you like what.

0:32:15.320 --> 0:32:18.800
<v Speaker 1>I I haven't done? Extensive reasons can tell you something.

0:32:18.800 --> 0:32:21.120
<v Speaker 2>If you want to watch me give myself a petty,

0:32:23.880 --> 0:32:28.440
<v Speaker 2>that's some cold hard cash, baby done right now, cold.

0:32:28.560 --> 0:32:30.640
<v Speaker 1>Hard cash, I think right now.

0:32:31.160 --> 0:32:35.320
<v Speaker 2>One hundred dollars a minute? What yeah, I would charge

0:32:35.320 --> 0:32:36.600
<v Speaker 2>one hundred dollars.

0:32:36.240 --> 0:32:42.200
<v Speaker 1>A minute, so ugly. Can I see your feet right now?

0:32:42.320 --> 0:32:46.240
<v Speaker 2>No way? But listen? Why literally no way? But listen

0:32:47.760 --> 0:32:50.040
<v Speaker 2>only because it forces your hand. We have to do

0:32:50.200 --> 0:32:52.200
<v Speaker 2>the only feet what's it called?

0:32:53.720 --> 0:32:56.920
<v Speaker 1>Feat finder? But people pay different things, so there's like

0:32:57.080 --> 0:32:59.200
<v Speaker 1>niche audiences like dirty feed.

0:32:59.480 --> 0:33:03.400
<v Speaker 2>You know I heard I heard this. I have weird toes.

0:33:04.040 --> 0:33:06.320
<v Speaker 1>No, how weird.

0:33:06.560 --> 0:33:10.560
<v Speaker 2>I can't show you explain that makes so much money.

0:33:11.560 --> 0:33:18.080
<v Speaker 2>Second and third toe literally might as well fingers have

0:33:18.200 --> 0:33:22.360
<v Speaker 2>been given to me by at the extraterrestrial. No, my

0:33:22.480 --> 0:33:26.160
<v Speaker 2>second third toe literally goes. Remember when He points his

0:33:26.160 --> 0:33:27.040
<v Speaker 2>finger and make the noise.

0:33:27.280 --> 0:33:27.480
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:33:31.560 --> 0:33:33.000
<v Speaker 2>Remember that's my toes.

0:33:33.600 --> 0:33:34.720
<v Speaker 1>But long, they're long.

0:33:35.800 --> 0:33:39.920
<v Speaker 2>I'm not even I won't describe anymore killing. I'll just

0:33:39.960 --> 0:33:42.600
<v Speaker 2>say that. Listen. No, no, I won't describe, but I would.

0:33:43.240 --> 0:33:46.640
<v Speaker 2>My daughter Eliah said you would make so much money

0:33:46.680 --> 0:33:48.560
<v Speaker 2>with your second third toe alone.

0:33:48.640 --> 0:33:51.760
<v Speaker 1>Oh you only show the genetic did you pass it

0:33:51.800 --> 0:33:52.880
<v Speaker 1>on to either your daughter?

0:33:52.920 --> 0:33:58.320
<v Speaker 2>It's a slight webbing, that's all I'm web there's a

0:33:58.360 --> 0:34:02.280
<v Speaker 2>slight webbing. And Billy Baldwin has it too. But I

0:34:02.280 --> 0:34:03.120
<v Speaker 2>shouldn't say that.

0:34:03.360 --> 0:34:09.440
<v Speaker 1>Oh I shouldn't out parents had it. Then that's funny.

0:34:09.520 --> 0:34:11.000
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, this is funny.

0:34:11.320 --> 0:34:17.120
<v Speaker 1>I outed Billy Baldin's we Wait. I'm so sorry to more.

0:34:17.560 --> 0:34:20.480
<v Speaker 2>Like the creature from the Black Lagoon kind of webbing.

0:34:20.520 --> 0:34:21.960
<v Speaker 2>It's not bad bad, it's.

0:34:21.840 --> 0:34:26.640
<v Speaker 1>Just, may I ask you, it just doesn't look.

0:34:26.520 --> 0:34:28.200
<v Speaker 2>Human, that's all I'm saying. That's all.

0:34:28.640 --> 0:34:33.680
<v Speaker 1>May I please, Stephen Baldwin ask you a question. In

0:34:33.800 --> 0:34:37.120
<v Speaker 1>thirty nine years, has your wife ever licked the webbing

0:34:37.200 --> 0:34:38.160
<v Speaker 1>between these toes?

0:34:39.280 --> 0:34:41.000
<v Speaker 2>I can't comment about that publicly.

0:34:52.480 --> 0:34:55.319
<v Speaker 1>Wow, you are going to make some cold hard cash here,

0:34:55.880 --> 0:34:58.719
<v Speaker 1>my friend. Do you think this is something well, I've

0:34:58.719 --> 0:34:58.960
<v Speaker 1>heard it.

0:35:00.000 --> 0:35:04.880
<v Speaker 2>I've heard people pay a lot of money, not just

0:35:04.920 --> 0:35:08.200
<v Speaker 2>for the dirtiness. Yeah, no, just like not like you know,

0:35:09.040 --> 0:35:12.319
<v Speaker 2>potting soil, you know under your toenails. You know, I

0:35:12.360 --> 0:35:16.480
<v Speaker 2>can understand i'd pay good money for that. But that aside? Yeah,

0:35:17.840 --> 0:35:24.359
<v Speaker 2>what am I talking about? Only here on misspelling? How

0:35:24.360 --> 0:35:29.239
<v Speaker 2>did your promo there? Sorry? Spontaneous promo? But like I

0:35:29.280 --> 0:35:34.480
<v Speaker 2>told you, do you want one more like? Amazing detail

0:35:34.480 --> 0:35:37.680
<v Speaker 2>that if I gave you this statistic of this you

0:35:37.800 --> 0:35:42.600
<v Speaker 2>almost wouldn't believe it. It's also a sign of intellect. Okay, okay, great, Okay,

0:35:43.200 --> 0:35:48.160
<v Speaker 2>So my second toe, the one next to your big toe, right,

0:35:48.400 --> 0:35:50.640
<v Speaker 2>is longer than my big toe.

0:35:51.000 --> 0:35:53.560
<v Speaker 1>Yes, but I've heard this sign of intellect.

0:35:53.760 --> 0:36:02.560
<v Speaker 2>Okay, my third toe is longer than my big toe.

0:36:02.880 --> 0:36:04.680
<v Speaker 2>You ever heard of that? Wait?

0:36:04.680 --> 0:36:07.759
<v Speaker 1>Wait, your big toe and then my second toe is

0:36:07.760 --> 0:36:10.640
<v Speaker 1>longer than your big toe. But your third toe.

0:36:11.080 --> 0:36:13.080
<v Speaker 2>Is still longer than my big toe.

0:36:13.880 --> 0:36:16.239
<v Speaker 1>Is it as long as your second toe?

0:36:16.560 --> 0:36:20.880
<v Speaker 2>No, it's a little shorter than the second, but still

0:36:20.920 --> 0:36:25.359
<v Speaker 2>sticks out further than my big toe. Statistically, this is

0:36:26.239 --> 0:36:26.920
<v Speaker 2>something else.

0:36:28.000 --> 0:36:31.840
<v Speaker 1>So I know this research that if you your second

0:36:31.880 --> 0:36:33.680
<v Speaker 1>toe next to your big toe is longer than your

0:36:33.680 --> 0:36:36.000
<v Speaker 1>big toe. It is a sign of intellect. But are

0:36:36.040 --> 0:36:38.920
<v Speaker 1>you telling me statistics show that if the third toe

0:36:38.960 --> 0:36:42.920
<v Speaker 1>is equally longer or just longer than the big toe

0:36:42.920 --> 0:36:44.120
<v Speaker 1>as well, you're even smarter.

0:36:45.320 --> 0:36:47.520
<v Speaker 2>I'm telling you that if the case is what you

0:36:47.640 --> 0:36:53.680
<v Speaker 2>just stated, I almost can't talk about it. Between that

0:36:53.880 --> 0:36:56.920
<v Speaker 2>and the webbing. Let's just leave it alone. Let's make

0:36:56.960 --> 0:37:01.920
<v Speaker 2>some money. Now, will you give me a patty? Because

0:37:01.960 --> 0:37:05.319
<v Speaker 2>that would be forget it. That would just smash the

0:37:05.360 --> 0:37:07.640
<v Speaker 2>internet if you and I did, if we did like

0:37:07.719 --> 0:37:10.560
<v Speaker 2>a pilot episode of what's it called webbed Feet? What's

0:37:10.560 --> 0:37:11.040
<v Speaker 2>it called.

0:37:12.520 --> 0:37:14.960
<v Speaker 1>Feed Finder, f Finder? I don't know if they do

0:37:15.080 --> 0:37:16.279
<v Speaker 1>videos on it, I'm not.

0:37:16.200 --> 0:37:22.520
<v Speaker 2>Sure Finder the celebrity people over there, you know, we

0:37:22.560 --> 0:37:23.040
<v Speaker 2>don't want.

0:37:22.920 --> 0:37:23.480
<v Speaker 1>To do that.

0:37:23.520 --> 0:37:26.160
<v Speaker 2>We don't want to do just the influencer people over there.

0:37:26.239 --> 0:37:31.640
<v Speaker 1>There's no celebrities find there's no celebrities on feet Finder. Way,

0:37:31.640 --> 0:37:32.319
<v Speaker 1>am I wrong here?

0:37:32.400 --> 0:37:35.919
<v Speaker 2>You must be? Can someone google it the first time

0:37:35.960 --> 0:37:39.120
<v Speaker 2>on the spot. I'm kind of doing that, breaking the

0:37:39.160 --> 0:37:41.520
<v Speaker 2>fourth wall? Are there celebrities something?

0:37:43.960 --> 0:37:44.600
<v Speaker 1>Oh? When?

0:37:45.800 --> 0:37:45.880
<v Speaker 2>No?

0:37:46.000 --> 0:37:51.680
<v Speaker 1>But we should like but we should showing their feet?

0:37:52.120 --> 0:37:53.000
<v Speaker 1>Why would they do that?

0:37:53.160 --> 0:37:54.359
<v Speaker 2>These people pay to see it?

0:37:54.480 --> 0:37:56.440
<v Speaker 1>No, she said, not selling.

0:37:57.320 --> 0:38:01.640
<v Speaker 2>Oh some kid, Come on, girl, you know some are selling.

0:38:01.960 --> 0:38:05.719
<v Speaker 1>Some of them are giving good feet. Baby, I have

0:38:06.120 --> 0:38:10.200
<v Speaker 1>great feets, our feet.

0:38:10.600 --> 0:38:13.919
<v Speaker 2>No, no, no, that means old duo. Would we would

0:38:14.000 --> 0:38:17.080
<v Speaker 2>break the internet because your feet are so great. Once

0:38:17.120 --> 0:38:19.719
<v Speaker 2>they panned over to my feet, like everything would shut down.

0:38:20.280 --> 0:38:25.360
<v Speaker 2>All of Elon Musk's satellites would just seize in a

0:38:25.400 --> 0:38:29.200
<v Speaker 2>moment if they saw my feet because they'd be going, wait,

0:38:29.239 --> 0:38:31.440
<v Speaker 2>we're in space and only aliens are in space, so

0:38:31.520 --> 0:38:34.759
<v Speaker 2>wise alien feet on Stephen Baldwin, it's weird.

0:38:34.960 --> 0:38:37.160
<v Speaker 1>Was that a deal breaker when you met your wife?

0:38:37.480 --> 0:38:37.560
<v Speaker 2>Like?

0:38:37.600 --> 0:38:40.440
<v Speaker 1>Do you have to say? Did you have to say? No?

0:38:40.719 --> 0:38:44.640
<v Speaker 2>She's so funny. I have very skinny legs. Okay, so

0:38:44.760 --> 0:38:49.680
<v Speaker 2>from the waist down, I'm pigeon toed, bow legged and

0:38:49.800 --> 0:38:50.520
<v Speaker 2>flat footed.

0:38:51.400 --> 0:38:55.319
<v Speaker 1>If I look, just skipped one part.

0:38:55.440 --> 0:38:56.840
<v Speaker 2>But look at how flat my foot is. You know

0:38:56.920 --> 0:38:57.440
<v Speaker 2>there's no arch.

0:38:58.640 --> 0:39:02.319
<v Speaker 1>Oh I do flat feet, literally a flat duck foot.

0:39:03.000 --> 0:39:05.920
<v Speaker 2>So my wife when she met me, you know, when

0:39:05.920 --> 0:39:07.920
<v Speaker 2>we were tooling around out in the Hampton's and she

0:39:08.080 --> 0:39:13.040
<v Speaker 2>was nineteen and from Rio de Janeira, Brazil, and I

0:39:13.120 --> 0:39:22.440
<v Speaker 2>married her because I only look stupid. So yes, she

0:39:22.560 --> 0:39:25.720
<v Speaker 2>saw my kind of webbed toes from the beginning.

0:39:27.360 --> 0:39:30.040
<v Speaker 1>So to your wife or girls you dated previously, you

0:39:30.120 --> 0:39:31.319
<v Speaker 1>never had felt the news.

0:39:31.800 --> 0:39:34.160
<v Speaker 2>I just think you know, I was so funny and

0:39:34.280 --> 0:39:37.520
<v Speaker 2>charming they never noticed. They wouldn't the alien toes?

0:39:38.280 --> 0:39:39.319
<v Speaker 1>Well, you kind of like them.

0:39:40.000 --> 0:39:41.640
<v Speaker 2>What's it called? The feat Network?

0:39:41.719 --> 0:39:43.839
<v Speaker 1>Which the kinder I'll write it down for you. You're

0:39:43.920 --> 0:39:46.000
<v Speaker 1>very interested, right, don't do it without me.

0:39:46.400 --> 0:39:51.480
<v Speaker 2>Let's do a special event. If James Moore says it's okay,

0:39:51.520 --> 0:39:54.399
<v Speaker 2>my guy, James Moore, I got to say to James,

0:39:54.480 --> 0:39:57.440
<v Speaker 2>can you and I do a feat Finder special event

0:39:57.800 --> 0:39:59.480
<v Speaker 2>one night only? Okay?

0:40:00.239 --> 0:40:00.439
<v Speaker 1>This?

0:40:01.000 --> 0:40:03.839
<v Speaker 2>And then we do like a short You only give

0:40:03.880 --> 0:40:06.839
<v Speaker 2>them like twenty minutes. That's it, And it's you giving

0:40:06.880 --> 0:40:09.000
<v Speaker 2>me like a twenty minute petty, but we do the

0:40:09.000 --> 0:40:11.000
<v Speaker 2>petty before. Really it she just.

0:40:11.040 --> 0:40:15.200
<v Speaker 1>Kind of why you don't trust No.

0:40:15.320 --> 0:40:17.240
<v Speaker 2>I mean, if you want to hang out and play

0:40:17.280 --> 0:40:19.040
<v Speaker 2>with my toes for a while, that's.

0:40:18.800 --> 0:40:22.360
<v Speaker 1>I'm very into diy. I can paint a mad toe

0:40:23.200 --> 0:40:26.760
<v Speaker 1>or second or third web toe. I can do it. Wow,

0:40:26.920 --> 0:40:27.319
<v Speaker 1>came on?

0:40:27.760 --> 0:40:31.160
<v Speaker 2>What this is good stuff for the afterlife TV show?

0:40:31.160 --> 0:40:33.279
<v Speaker 2>Like se So you're a character now, is that too?

0:40:33.560 --> 0:40:34.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

0:40:34.080 --> 0:40:35.440
<v Speaker 2>Like what am I going to do now that like

0:40:35.480 --> 0:40:37.840
<v Speaker 2>we're no longer running a church, you open a salon.

0:40:38.800 --> 0:40:43.040
<v Speaker 1>Okay, that's perfect, great, Wow.

0:40:42.800 --> 0:40:45.160
<v Speaker 2>And then like we do an episode where one guy says,

0:40:45.360 --> 0:40:47.480
<v Speaker 2>you're the former pastor of this town and da da

0:40:47.560 --> 0:40:49.560
<v Speaker 2>da da, and I'll write a check donation to her

0:40:49.640 --> 0:40:52.200
<v Speaker 2>charity if we can like do a live thing of

0:40:52.239 --> 0:40:54.200
<v Speaker 2>your wife giving you a Petter cure on the internet.

0:40:54.239 --> 0:40:56.960
<v Speaker 2>And my character goes, no, honey, I can't do it.

0:40:57.000 --> 0:40:58.760
<v Speaker 2>My toes are too ugly, and you're.

0:40:58.560 --> 0:41:01.400
<v Speaker 1>Like, you can't do this is a ten thousand dollars

0:41:01.760 --> 0:41:06.640
<v Speaker 1>This is good. That's yes, clever. Yeah, wait, I think

0:41:06.680 --> 0:41:08.719
<v Speaker 1>we should do only fans now now that I'm like

0:41:09.520 --> 0:41:10.719
<v Speaker 1>thinking about this idea.

0:41:10.760 --> 0:41:13.160
<v Speaker 2>But you'll just make like five million a month. You

0:41:13.160 --> 0:41:15.800
<v Speaker 2>don't want to do that. Yeah, you don't want to

0:41:15.840 --> 0:41:20.080
<v Speaker 2>do that. Huh, that's just that'll just you don't discombobulate everything.

0:41:20.200 --> 0:41:22.359
<v Speaker 2>You're good, you have what you need, you're good to go.

0:41:22.719 --> 0:41:25.600
<v Speaker 2>Start with the feet. I say, you do the feet

0:41:25.680 --> 0:41:31.279
<v Speaker 2>and do it for charity. And see what. No, I

0:41:31.480 --> 0:41:34.759
<v Speaker 2>know you can do it. Nine o two one, oh toho?

0:41:35.239 --> 0:41:45.120
<v Speaker 2>Get it? Nine oh two to one too, okay, get it? Yes, Wow.

0:41:45.840 --> 0:41:50.440
<v Speaker 1>Wow, I think that would affect the algorithm quite friends,

0:41:50.440 --> 0:41:53.879
<v Speaker 1>I think it's funnier to do it together. I'll do it.

0:41:54.080 --> 0:41:54.839
<v Speaker 1>I'll keep going.

0:41:55.880 --> 0:41:58.839
<v Speaker 2>But you have nice feet, like like, let's stop, like

0:41:58.840 --> 0:42:00.759
<v Speaker 2>like turn the cameras off, right, hours are off? Now?

0:42:00.800 --> 0:42:05.800
<v Speaker 2>Oh eight, Tori? I are you My feet are scandalous?

0:42:06.200 --> 0:42:11.319
<v Speaker 1>Like great? I love a good scandal. You're gonna show

0:42:11.360 --> 0:42:12.480
<v Speaker 1>you a picture of your feet?

0:42:13.000 --> 0:42:16.279
<v Speaker 2>Now you're really into it?

0:42:16.760 --> 0:42:18.080
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, this is great.

0:42:18.200 --> 0:42:22.839
<v Speaker 2>I'm totally into the fact that you're into it, right,

0:42:23.239 --> 0:42:24.440
<v Speaker 2>I mean we're artists.

0:42:24.560 --> 0:42:30.920
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Oh wait, his feet are in there? Oh yes, Lucium,

0:42:31.120 --> 0:42:34.800
<v Speaker 1>are there more pictures? Wait? Can we take this? Okay,

0:42:34.840 --> 0:42:38.680
<v Speaker 1>so this is a different website called wiki feet, where

0:42:38.880 --> 0:42:41.319
<v Speaker 1>you don't get paid. No one gets paid. They take

0:42:41.400 --> 0:42:45.560
<v Speaker 1>stars and they screenshot pictures of their feet from photos

0:42:45.719 --> 0:42:49.160
<v Speaker 1>or from movies, and then you get a rating.

0:42:49.320 --> 0:42:50.040
<v Speaker 2>You can't see you.

0:42:52.719 --> 0:42:56.240
<v Speaker 1>I I of know how to use the computer. Wait,

0:42:56.280 --> 0:42:57.080
<v Speaker 1>I don't know what to do.

0:42:57.600 --> 0:42:59.600
<v Speaker 2>This is so freaking genius, right.

0:43:01.080 --> 0:43:02.160
<v Speaker 1>You're a filthy liar.

0:43:03.239 --> 0:43:06.799
<v Speaker 2>Get really is the third one?

0:43:06.880 --> 0:43:09.000
<v Speaker 1>Dude? Where's the webbing? Third?

0:43:09.120 --> 0:43:12.839
<v Speaker 2>Well, you can't see the webbing, it's in between. It

0:43:12.880 --> 0:43:20.080
<v Speaker 2>all comes out when you spread them. I don't touch that.

0:43:19.280 --> 0:43:21.600
<v Speaker 1>You literally do well.

0:43:21.600 --> 0:43:22.920
<v Speaker 2>Praise God. Yeah, leave it alone.

0:43:23.480 --> 0:43:30.680
<v Speaker 1>Then I went to if I okay, wait, but.

0:43:30.840 --> 0:43:33.080
<v Speaker 2>Like, am I wrong to like be so kind of

0:43:33.160 --> 0:43:38.320
<v Speaker 2>comfortable with my sketchy toes, like ponder like some people

0:43:38.360 --> 0:43:40.760
<v Speaker 2>think they're like really an alien and we're not humans,

0:43:42.360 --> 0:43:47.200
<v Speaker 2>And I'm just wondering with like, certainly questionable, this kind

0:43:47.200 --> 0:43:48.240
<v Speaker 2>of a questionable toe.

0:43:48.680 --> 0:43:49.600
<v Speaker 1>Who else has a billy?

0:43:49.640 --> 0:43:54.000
<v Speaker 2>You said billy has a slight webbing? Is like, I

0:43:54.040 --> 0:43:55.800
<v Speaker 2>have the most webbing and I'm the youngest.

0:43:55.920 --> 0:43:58.200
<v Speaker 1>Your kids didn't get it could be like a creepy.

0:43:58.719 --> 0:44:03.040
<v Speaker 2>You know, intercollect generational conspiracy.

0:44:05.560 --> 0:44:09.160
<v Speaker 1>Wait, so we reconnect it recently at a fan con.

0:44:09.239 --> 0:44:13.359
<v Speaker 1>We haven't seen each other in years. Fair yep. And

0:44:13.440 --> 0:44:16.040
<v Speaker 1>I was with my son Bo, who is just turned eight.

0:44:17.080 --> 0:44:18.759
<v Speaker 1>I don't know why I said, just turn because you

0:44:18.800 --> 0:44:21.200
<v Speaker 1>know what, he's my youngest and it's like he's growing

0:44:21.280 --> 0:44:23.240
<v Speaker 1>up and I'm like, not gonna have a baby anymore.

0:44:23.800 --> 0:44:25.759
<v Speaker 2>Totally one of the most awesome kids I've ever seen

0:44:25.800 --> 0:44:30.680
<v Speaker 2>in my life. Loved his haircut, which.

0:44:30.440 --> 0:44:34.360
<v Speaker 1>Is no haircut, his long hair exactly, so I related.

0:44:36.239 --> 0:44:38.120
<v Speaker 2>But he just wanted to have fun, and that's the

0:44:38.120 --> 0:44:40.080
<v Speaker 2>coolest thing ever. So you're letting him be a kid.

0:44:40.120 --> 0:44:41.440
<v Speaker 2>That's the best thing you can do.

0:44:42.640 --> 0:44:46.839
<v Speaker 1>The funniest part to me is you instinctly went into

0:44:46.880 --> 0:44:48.520
<v Speaker 1>pitching to him who you are.

0:44:51.760 --> 0:44:53.040
<v Speaker 2>With young people?

0:44:54.960 --> 0:44:56.440
<v Speaker 1>Justin Bieber five?

0:44:56.800 --> 0:44:57.560
<v Speaker 2>What's that first?

0:44:57.560 --> 0:44:59.839
<v Speaker 1>She saying a Justin Bieber song? And he just looked

0:44:59.840 --> 0:45:01.759
<v Speaker 1>at you like quizzically.

0:45:02.480 --> 0:45:05.600
<v Speaker 2>Well, and I don't think he was into it.

0:45:06.480 --> 0:45:11.640
<v Speaker 1>He's right right right, yeah, sok Elmo.

0:45:12.120 --> 0:45:14.320
<v Speaker 2>And then I mentioned I was Barney Rubble.

0:45:14.160 --> 0:45:18.200
<v Speaker 1>Right, which he is not entrained, but that could but

0:45:18.280 --> 0:45:20.879
<v Speaker 1>he knew Fred Flintstone, so yeah he could. He could

0:45:20.920 --> 0:45:22.200
<v Speaker 1>kind of put that scrap him.

0:45:22.600 --> 0:45:24.400
<v Speaker 2>Then I told him we talked about skateboarding.

0:45:24.600 --> 0:45:25.080
<v Speaker 1>He liked that.

0:45:26.200 --> 0:45:31.080
<v Speaker 2>Christiana sooy my good friend and uh yeah. And then

0:45:31.120 --> 0:45:34.680
<v Speaker 2>I think the cool part was he just wanted to

0:45:34.719 --> 0:45:39.000
<v Speaker 2>go binary. Yeah, so I just let him Benarley. Yeah,

0:45:39.080 --> 0:45:40.520
<v Speaker 2>So I think that's why he thinks I might be

0:45:40.560 --> 0:45:43.799
<v Speaker 2>a little cool at least I hope so say cold

0:45:43.880 --> 0:45:44.160
<v Speaker 2>or cool?

0:45:44.920 --> 0:45:45.200
<v Speaker 1>Cool?

0:45:45.600 --> 0:45:45.880
<v Speaker 2>Cool?

0:45:46.000 --> 0:45:47.719
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, he just liked you for you. It didn't matter

0:45:47.719 --> 0:45:50.120
<v Speaker 1>if he didn't, That's what I'm saying. So I love

0:45:50.239 --> 0:45:51.560
<v Speaker 1>that aspect.

0:45:52.000 --> 0:45:56.160
<v Speaker 2>I'm going to sing my themes on one Bad One bad.

0:45:56.600 --> 0:45:57.839
<v Speaker 1>I don't have a set like that.

0:45:57.960 --> 0:46:05.440
<v Speaker 2>One bad move the dude. Let me write your misspelling

0:46:05.560 --> 0:46:10.240
<v Speaker 2>theme songs that I will do a rap too. Remember

0:46:10.280 --> 0:46:15.520
<v Speaker 2>how you said you should let Stevie b the Gramps

0:46:16.120 --> 0:46:19.360
<v Speaker 2>right the misspelling joint?

0:46:19.920 --> 0:46:21.640
<v Speaker 1>Perfect, I'll pay you on crypto.

0:46:21.360 --> 0:46:25.759
<v Speaker 2>Coin when we do our series together. Let me help

0:46:25.800 --> 0:46:28.919
<v Speaker 2>you with your comedy. Okay, just let me help you.

0:46:29.600 --> 0:46:31.719
<v Speaker 2>I'll be your husband. It'll be great, like we'll just.

0:46:32.320 --> 0:46:36.040
<v Speaker 1>Wow perfect, help me with my comedy.

0:46:37.840 --> 0:46:42.480
<v Speaker 2>God has sent me into your life strategically at this

0:46:42.719 --> 0:46:44.720
<v Speaker 2>moment to help you with.

0:46:48.320 --> 0:46:52.959
<v Speaker 1>Said no man, ever, what is happening right now? Wait

0:46:53.080 --> 0:46:56.960
<v Speaker 1>now I can hold my own. I'm your funniest shite.

0:46:57.280 --> 0:47:00.760
<v Speaker 1>You're to have fun.

0:47:01.960 --> 0:47:06.040
<v Speaker 2>I'm rattling your cage. I'm rattling your comedy cage.

0:47:06.160 --> 0:47:11.200
<v Speaker 1>Baby rattled. So let's do a swing.

0:47:13.280 --> 0:47:15.160
<v Speaker 2>So what do you think of the Afterlife? Do you

0:47:15.200 --> 0:47:19.960
<v Speaker 2>think they're playing a former pastor's wife? Is something I

0:47:20.160 --> 0:47:22.560
<v Speaker 2>think you would be so funny.

0:47:23.160 --> 0:47:25.520
<v Speaker 1>I think it's a great idea. I think with the

0:47:25.600 --> 0:47:29.080
<v Speaker 1>right comedy team involved writing it and going to the

0:47:29.120 --> 0:47:38.840
<v Speaker 1>right network. How do you think Hilaria is going to do?

0:47:40.040 --> 0:47:42.480
<v Speaker 2>Did I show you what I had made don't say

0:47:42.560 --> 0:47:46.840
<v Speaker 2>what it is. Don't see what it is. So for

0:47:47.000 --> 0:47:50.920
<v Speaker 2>Dancing with the Stars, you're gonna see this. Ah, this

0:47:51.000 --> 0:47:54.840
<v Speaker 2>isn't that cute. You have to scoop on that. But

0:47:54.920 --> 0:47:55.839
<v Speaker 2>we do it tomorrow night.

0:47:56.160 --> 0:47:59.160
<v Speaker 1>That's today Monday, Yes, oh my god, it's tomorrow night.

0:47:59.560 --> 0:48:03.719
<v Speaker 2>It's I guess who asked me to go to be

0:48:03.800 --> 0:48:08.880
<v Speaker 2>his date, Alec Baldwin. Ladies and gentlemen, don't know if

0:48:08.920 --> 0:48:10.920
<v Speaker 2>you heard of him, because.

0:48:10.640 --> 0:48:12.600
<v Speaker 1>You don't get that many tickets even when you're on

0:48:12.640 --> 0:48:17.239
<v Speaker 1>the show. It's limited. Yes, last season eliminated.

0:48:17.280 --> 0:48:22.160
<v Speaker 2>First my god, James told me that. Oh my gosh. Wow.

0:48:23.800 --> 0:48:26.480
<v Speaker 1>So it's the season right after my season, so I'm

0:48:26.600 --> 0:48:30.399
<v Speaker 1>very excited to see everyone can go down.

0:48:31.480 --> 0:48:32.360
<v Speaker 2>Laria is ready.

0:48:33.680 --> 0:48:35.480
<v Speaker 1>Oh she was born ready.

0:48:35.600 --> 0:48:36.759
<v Speaker 2>This is like, sir enough.

0:48:37.520 --> 0:48:38.600
<v Speaker 1>I think she could win.

0:48:40.000 --> 0:48:42.760
<v Speaker 2>She might be able to take it all, no doubt.

0:48:43.000 --> 0:48:46.520
<v Speaker 1>She can do anything. She's like not human, so she's

0:48:47.160 --> 0:48:50.440
<v Speaker 1>very talented. Do you think Alec is worried about her

0:48:50.480 --> 0:48:53.880
<v Speaker 1>partner club because he had a showmance with his partner

0:48:53.960 --> 0:48:57.720
<v Speaker 1>last season. No, he's very hot, very he's spartan.

0:48:57.840 --> 0:49:02.080
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but Lari is kind of coming to her own

0:49:02.200 --> 0:49:07.080
<v Speaker 2>now as an artist, and I think she's just having fun. Yeah,

0:49:07.320 --> 0:49:13.080
<v Speaker 2>and I think Glib knows everything's cool. And you know,

0:49:13.160 --> 0:49:15.440
<v Speaker 2>we don't want to have to take you back to Massapequa.

0:49:15.520 --> 0:49:22.400
<v Speaker 2>You know what I mean. Don't be glib Cleb. You

0:49:22.440 --> 0:49:25.440
<v Speaker 2>know what I'm saying. Don't make me make the phone

0:49:25.440 --> 0:49:29.920
<v Speaker 2>call Glib, call my boys, they come see you. We

0:49:30.000 --> 0:49:31.800
<v Speaker 2>take you back to Massa Piqua. Know what I'm saying.

0:49:32.280 --> 0:49:37.360
<v Speaker 2>No worries. No, that's comedy. That's comedy gold people. But no,

0:49:37.480 --> 0:49:40.360
<v Speaker 2>I think I think I'm I'm excited for Gleb actually,

0:49:40.360 --> 0:49:42.879
<v Speaker 2>because he's a great dancer, very good and I think

0:49:42.960 --> 0:49:44.279
<v Speaker 2>together they could win it all.

0:49:45.280 --> 0:49:48.280
<v Speaker 1>Very good. Yeah, and this is kind of I feel

0:49:48.280 --> 0:49:53.279
<v Speaker 1>for him a comeback because Brooks Nader has publicly taken

0:49:53.360 --> 0:49:55.400
<v Speaker 1>him down that he cheated on her and then just

0:49:55.400 --> 0:49:59.040
<v Speaker 1>gone to town on him, which no comment. I love

0:49:59.160 --> 0:50:02.200
<v Speaker 1>Brooks and both, so I have no idea what he's.

0:50:02.200 --> 0:50:05.400
<v Speaker 2>Back, and he's tending to the business at hand right.

0:50:05.320 --> 0:50:08.640
<v Speaker 1>So I feel like this is a perfect duo. I'm

0:50:08.719 --> 0:50:12.600
<v Speaker 1>very excited for them. They might be my favorite, but

0:50:12.640 --> 0:50:14.920
<v Speaker 1>I haven't seen it yet, so see what happens.

0:50:15.440 --> 0:50:21.080
<v Speaker 2>We have to support support support on DWTS have you ever.

0:50:20.920 --> 0:50:23.480
<v Speaker 1>Been in that ballroom like with so.

0:50:23.520 --> 0:50:26.200
<v Speaker 2>I've never been on the show ever, nothing any.

0:50:26.080 --> 0:50:29.799
<v Speaker 1>But not like visiting somebody like not tomorrow night. It's

0:50:29.880 --> 0:50:30.320
<v Speaker 1>my first.

0:50:31.560 --> 0:50:37.279
<v Speaker 2>It's very different, and I pop my dwts cherry and

0:50:37.400 --> 0:50:39.799
<v Speaker 2>I just wouldn't have it any other way with my

0:50:39.880 --> 0:50:40.919
<v Speaker 2>web does.

0:50:42.960 --> 0:50:44.080
<v Speaker 1>Is it hard to find shoes?

0:50:44.440 --> 0:50:45.120
<v Speaker 2>Yeah? Kind of.

0:50:45.160 --> 0:50:47.279
<v Speaker 1>Actually I wanted to tell that little story that I

0:50:47.320 --> 0:50:50.040
<v Speaker 1>talked to you about. Which story at the night at

0:50:50.080 --> 0:50:50.480
<v Speaker 1>the club?

0:50:51.480 --> 0:50:56.359
<v Speaker 2>I don't remember anything. I did we make out? Yeah

0:50:57.280 --> 0:50:59.960
<v Speaker 2>we did. We have to wait and talk about it,

0:51:00.160 --> 0:51:00.920
<v Speaker 2>my shaw.

0:51:01.280 --> 0:51:02.680
<v Speaker 1>Fuck, No, why do you think you're here? I want

0:51:02.680 --> 0:51:03.440
<v Speaker 1>to talk to the story.

0:51:03.560 --> 0:51:04.080
<v Speaker 2>I think it was.

0:51:06.200 --> 0:51:07.680
<v Speaker 1>I wish it's so hot.

0:51:13.600 --> 0:51:16.680
<v Speaker 2>I could swear. I remember making out with Tory spelling.

0:51:18.719 --> 0:51:24.279
<v Speaker 1>It wasn't like makeout. It wasn't make up. See there

0:51:24.320 --> 0:51:26.920
<v Speaker 1>was some grinding and some liip actions, but it wasn't makeout.

0:51:27.160 --> 0:51:31.840
<v Speaker 2>I have no recollection I know any such activity.

0:51:31.960 --> 0:51:32.920
<v Speaker 1>So when I saw you at the.

0:51:33.040 --> 0:51:37.040
<v Speaker 2>Door, if I were able to have any type of

0:51:37.080 --> 0:51:41.200
<v Speaker 2>information of any such activity, would I be at leisure

0:51:41.320 --> 0:51:43.120
<v Speaker 2>to disclose such information?

0:51:43.680 --> 0:51:48.279
<v Speaker 1>I'm being an idiot, glad, I'm super forgettable anyway, But what.

0:51:48.560 --> 0:51:50.640
<v Speaker 2>Was it like sun Dance or something like in.

0:51:50.600 --> 0:51:56.360
<v Speaker 1>The morning, so that Pantera Sarah's one of her clubs.

0:51:58.000 --> 0:51:58.200
<v Speaker 1>I know.

0:51:58.280 --> 0:52:00.680
<v Speaker 2>It was like, hello, can I just is this on?

0:52:00.920 --> 0:52:03.600
<v Speaker 1>Wasn't delicious analyzed those words?

0:52:04.040 --> 0:52:06.400
<v Speaker 2>It was at pan.

0:52:06.400 --> 0:52:08.560
<v Speaker 1>Tara Sarah's club.

0:52:09.200 --> 0:52:13.920
<v Speaker 2>Yes, I just I sort of present this information to

0:52:13.960 --> 0:52:15.280
<v Speaker 2>the judge and the jury go ahead.

0:52:17.719 --> 0:52:21.200
<v Speaker 1>Now I feel nervous. I have to pick and choose

0:52:21.320 --> 0:52:22.560
<v Speaker 1>my words.

0:52:22.160 --> 0:52:26.800
<v Speaker 2>Here lips and grinding. Well, what do you expect that

0:52:26.880 --> 0:52:29.680
<v Speaker 2>a pantheras Sarah? Whatever? I don't care if she's.

0:52:34.960 --> 0:52:38.719
<v Speaker 1>What was it called? Can you name her clubs? Any

0:52:38.800 --> 0:52:41.640
<v Speaker 1>that you went to she had?

0:52:42.040 --> 0:52:43.720
<v Speaker 2>She hosted the clubs.

0:52:45.120 --> 0:52:51.640
<v Speaker 1>No, No, she hosted club promoter, and she was very

0:52:51.640 --> 0:52:55.480
<v Speaker 1>in touch with celebrities and actors and she would ask

0:52:55.560 --> 0:52:57.279
<v Speaker 1>us do you want to come to these things? And

0:52:57.320 --> 0:52:59.879
<v Speaker 1>she would always protect us like it was like if

0:52:59.880 --> 0:53:02.200
<v Speaker 1>you go to these things, and it wasn't too like.

0:53:02.960 --> 0:53:03.640
<v Speaker 2>She was just good.

0:53:03.719 --> 0:53:07.919
<v Speaker 1>People's great and yeah, you always felt like you could

0:53:07.920 --> 0:53:10.960
<v Speaker 1>go and you were safe. They're not too many. It

0:53:11.000 --> 0:53:13.439
<v Speaker 1>wasn't like a tourist trap. It was right now it's

0:53:13.440 --> 0:53:17.600
<v Speaker 1>different now, but we could kind of be ourselves and

0:53:17.719 --> 0:53:19.600
<v Speaker 1>act out a little bit and not worry about me.

0:53:19.719 --> 0:53:20.480
<v Speaker 2>Ask you a question.

0:53:20.800 --> 0:53:23.399
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, was there?

0:53:24.560 --> 0:53:29.840
<v Speaker 2>Of course everybody partied. I've told stories about my having

0:53:29.880 --> 0:53:34.000
<v Speaker 2>gone to the Playboy Mansion and my tour guide was

0:53:35.360 --> 0:53:39.520
<v Speaker 2>Robert Downey Jr. That was quite an experience. So we've

0:53:39.560 --> 0:53:43.080
<v Speaker 2>all kind of been there, done that, right. Uh? But

0:53:43.440 --> 0:53:47.200
<v Speaker 2>for you, was there? Was it ever? Sid Nancy? Did

0:53:47.200 --> 0:53:50.840
<v Speaker 2>it ever? Get that Craig Cray.

0:53:52.200 --> 0:53:52.759
<v Speaker 1>In what way?

0:53:53.840 --> 0:53:56.279
<v Speaker 2>I don't know, sex, drugs, rock and roll?

0:53:56.400 --> 0:53:59.600
<v Speaker 1>Oh. I was really really a good kid.

0:54:00.880 --> 0:54:04.879
<v Speaker 2>You know. I was a good kid because of what

0:54:04.960 --> 0:54:05.960
<v Speaker 2>because of your parents?

0:54:06.400 --> 0:54:09.080
<v Speaker 1>No, I just I just didn't partake in that stuff.

0:54:12.040 --> 0:54:12.640
<v Speaker 2>Just pincher.

0:54:13.040 --> 0:54:16.960
<v Speaker 1>I didn't so freaking cute. I wish I had a

0:54:17.000 --> 0:54:20.680
<v Speaker 1>little bit more now it's fun. Yeah, No, I had fun.

0:54:20.680 --> 0:54:24.279
<v Speaker 1>I d I would drink, Yeah, and I was like

0:54:24.320 --> 0:54:27.200
<v Speaker 1>a kissing bandit. So it wasn't hard for you to

0:54:27.200 --> 0:54:29.960
<v Speaker 1>put me under your spell the spell, see how I

0:54:30.120 --> 0:54:30.799
<v Speaker 1>like I did that?

0:54:31.000 --> 0:54:37.400
<v Speaker 2>You like that one? It was your spell on a misspell?

0:54:38.239 --> 0:54:42.720
<v Speaker 1>Whoa, Yeah, it was like something on Sunset was the club?

0:54:43.719 --> 0:54:45.279
<v Speaker 2>Why? Uh?

0:54:45.320 --> 0:54:47.440
<v Speaker 1>And we were in there and there was a band

0:54:47.520 --> 0:54:49.880
<v Speaker 1>playing and there's a lot of music. We were on

0:54:49.920 --> 0:54:52.600
<v Speaker 1>the dance floor. I was dancing with a friend and

0:54:52.640 --> 0:54:55.440
<v Speaker 1>you came up and you started grinding up behind me

0:54:56.360 --> 0:54:59.640
<v Speaker 1>and I turned around, like what the fuck and it

0:54:59.680 --> 0:55:01.280
<v Speaker 1>was you and I was like, oh, it's Stephen Bowen.

0:55:01.320 --> 0:55:07.439
<v Speaker 1>That's so hot. Oh my god. Yeah, and then we

0:55:07.480 --> 0:55:09.799
<v Speaker 1>like danced for a while, like it was very like

0:55:09.880 --> 0:55:14.840
<v Speaker 1>dirty dancing. You're a good dancer. And then there was

0:55:14.880 --> 0:55:16.160
<v Speaker 1>like and.

0:55:16.080 --> 0:55:22.000
<v Speaker 2>This was in nineteen eighty nine, perfect, Yeah, you were.

0:55:21.920 --> 0:55:23.799
<v Speaker 1>Talking close to me and maybe you went in for

0:55:23.840 --> 0:55:26.320
<v Speaker 1>a kiss. Like it was like nothing, it was very innocent.

0:55:26.920 --> 0:55:29.640
<v Speaker 1>And then you were like, come on, let's go, and

0:55:29.680 --> 0:55:32.719
<v Speaker 1>I was like, no, I'm okay, not let's go, like,

0:55:32.840 --> 0:55:34.640
<v Speaker 1>let's get out of here, like let's go over here.

0:55:35.640 --> 0:55:39.719
<v Speaker 2>Well, as I recall something I don't recall at all,

0:55:40.840 --> 0:55:48.920
<v Speaker 2>but I'm pretty sure even though you're so innocent, I

0:55:48.960 --> 0:55:50.920
<v Speaker 2>probably just was dancing behind you and you might have

0:55:51.000 --> 0:55:53.120
<v Speaker 2>backed up a little bit, Tori. That's all I'm saying,

0:55:53.280 --> 0:55:57.200
<v Speaker 2>you know what I mean, Oh, oh my god, he

0:55:57.239 --> 0:56:00.000
<v Speaker 2>looks enough like Billy. Let me back up right now,

0:56:00.160 --> 0:56:00.719
<v Speaker 2>you know what I mean?

0:56:03.239 --> 0:56:07.480
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, just saying maybe now when I look.

0:56:07.400 --> 0:56:10.200
<v Speaker 2>Back into balance any of that at all.

0:56:10.239 --> 0:56:12.360
<v Speaker 1>I look back and it was you. I did, for

0:56:12.400 --> 0:56:14.799
<v Speaker 1>sure backed up you might have.

0:56:15.600 --> 0:56:19.920
<v Speaker 2>I'm trying to well, it just may have just been posturing,

0:56:20.200 --> 0:56:21.200
<v Speaker 2>It may have just been.

0:56:22.800 --> 0:56:28.840
<v Speaker 1>Er. It was adorable. Yeah, yeah, the laughter, I know

0:56:28.880 --> 0:56:29.840
<v Speaker 1>what would have happened.

0:56:31.320 --> 0:56:34.520
<v Speaker 2>You would have seen my toes definitely would have seen.

0:56:36.920 --> 0:56:39.960
<v Speaker 2>And I think this interview is there's no better way

0:56:40.000 --> 0:56:40.880
<v Speaker 2>to end this interview