1 00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:03,000 Speaker 1: Brought to you by the reinvented two thousand twelve Camray. 2 00:00:03,240 --> 00:00:09,959 Speaker 1: It's ready. Are you welcome to stump Mom never told you? 3 00:00:10,200 --> 00:00:18,079 Speaker 1: From House to Works dot com. Hey, welcome to the podcast. 4 00:00:18,160 --> 00:00:22,120 Speaker 1: This is Molly and I'm Kristen. Kristen, I have something 5 00:00:22,160 --> 00:00:26,680 Speaker 1: pretty cool to brag it up. Okay, So before we 6 00:00:26,720 --> 00:00:29,160 Speaker 1: came in here, I was taking a little quiz on 7 00:00:29,280 --> 00:00:33,400 Speaker 1: Discovery Health dot Com about my levels of jealousy, and, 8 00:00:33,440 --> 00:00:35,839 Speaker 1: as it turns out, based on a ten or so 9 00:00:36,040 --> 00:00:40,960 Speaker 1: question uh quiz, I am not a jealous person. Apparently 10 00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:43,559 Speaker 1: on a scale of one hundred, I am only three 11 00:00:43,680 --> 00:00:47,839 Speaker 1: jealous twenty three out of a hundred. Apparently according to 12 00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:50,680 Speaker 1: the test results, it says you appear to have a 13 00:00:50,720 --> 00:00:55,760 Speaker 1: complete lack of jealous feelings. Um, that sounds kind of inhuman, Molly, 14 00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:58,920 Speaker 1: But I guess, uh, kudos, because I took that same 15 00:00:59,040 --> 00:01:01,600 Speaker 1: quiz and I scored a twenty eight, So it looks 16 00:01:01,680 --> 00:01:05,440 Speaker 1: like I am being more jealous of the two five 17 00:01:05,480 --> 00:01:07,360 Speaker 1: points more jealous. I will say I had a few 18 00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:10,760 Speaker 1: problems with some of the questions. Um. There was a 19 00:01:10,840 --> 00:01:13,760 Speaker 1: question that said, accidentally you find out that your boyfriend 20 00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:16,880 Speaker 1: slash husband confided confided in his friend that he had 21 00:01:16,920 --> 00:01:20,759 Speaker 1: a sexual dream about his favorite actress, and you're asked 22 00:01:20,800 --> 00:01:23,480 Speaker 1: to rate how much would it bother you? From extremely 23 00:01:23,959 --> 00:01:26,560 Speaker 1: do not at all. Now, it's not gonna bother me 24 00:01:26,600 --> 00:01:28,440 Speaker 1: if a guy has a dream about his favorite actress, 25 00:01:28,480 --> 00:01:30,400 Speaker 1: because he's probably never going to meet his favorite act 26 00:01:31,040 --> 00:01:33,119 Speaker 1: it could have been a dream about his ex girlfriend. 27 00:01:33,520 --> 00:01:35,240 Speaker 1: I mean I might have rated it a little higher 28 00:01:35,280 --> 00:01:37,360 Speaker 1: than I did. Yeah, I found a problem with the 29 00:01:37,440 --> 00:01:40,280 Speaker 1: question asking what would you do if you were at 30 00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:41,960 Speaker 1: a party with your boyfriend and you notice that he 31 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:45,360 Speaker 1: was flirting with a girl. I said that I would. 32 00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:48,560 Speaker 1: I would approach them and make a sarcastic comment about 33 00:01:48,600 --> 00:01:51,960 Speaker 1: them flirting, which, once again, it all depends on the girl. 34 00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:53,840 Speaker 1: You know. If it was, like you said, like an 35 00:01:53,840 --> 00:01:57,200 Speaker 1: ex girlfriend, I would probably fly into his screaming rage 36 00:01:57,320 --> 00:02:00,760 Speaker 1: and leave the party, and i'd I did find some 37 00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:03,280 Speaker 1: of the options they provided for us a little humorous. 38 00:02:03,880 --> 00:02:08,079 Speaker 1: Um For example, would you uh tell your mate that 39 00:02:08,120 --> 00:02:09,960 Speaker 1: you were not feeling well and leave the party with 40 00:02:10,120 --> 00:02:13,520 Speaker 1: or without him? No? Would you find someone to flirt 41 00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:17,440 Speaker 1: with but not really enjoy it? Could be would you 42 00:02:17,480 --> 00:02:19,720 Speaker 1: approach them? Is this what you had to make an 43 00:02:19,760 --> 00:02:23,440 Speaker 1: ironic remark about their flirting exactly. Yeah, that's what I 44 00:02:23,440 --> 00:02:25,240 Speaker 1: would like myself to do. That's what I'd like the 45 00:02:25,280 --> 00:02:28,080 Speaker 1: cool Christian to do. I would like to get up 46 00:02:28,120 --> 00:02:29,760 Speaker 1: and beat the crap out of the woman, which is 47 00:02:29,760 --> 00:02:32,679 Speaker 1: a direct quote from the quiz by the way, Um. 48 00:02:32,720 --> 00:02:35,600 Speaker 1: But before we get into things, I would beat the 49 00:02:35,639 --> 00:02:37,560 Speaker 1: crap out of Why don't we talk more about what 50 00:02:37,680 --> 00:02:40,600 Speaker 1: jealousy is and why some people think that women experience 51 00:02:40,680 --> 00:02:43,119 Speaker 1: it differently than men. Okay, well, I think the first 52 00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:44,600 Speaker 1: thing that we have to talk about, Molly, is a 53 00:02:44,639 --> 00:02:48,639 Speaker 1: difference between jealousy and envy, because those words are used 54 00:02:48,680 --> 00:02:51,840 Speaker 1: interchangeably a lot, and and the fact of the matter 55 00:02:51,960 --> 00:02:55,920 Speaker 1: is they are completely different. Right. Jealousy comes from the 56 00:02:55,960 --> 00:03:01,360 Speaker 1: Greek word zelos, meaning ardor intense desire or eagerness, or 57 00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:04,760 Speaker 1: as envy is in short, you know, a desire for 58 00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:08,240 Speaker 1: something that's not yours. Right. It's basically what you have 59 00:03:08,360 --> 00:03:11,360 Speaker 1: and what you're afraid of losing versus what someone else 60 00:03:11,480 --> 00:03:14,360 Speaker 1: has that you don't have. That's envy. And losing a 61 00:03:14,400 --> 00:03:19,720 Speaker 1: potential like job or partner or possession that you already 62 00:03:19,720 --> 00:03:22,600 Speaker 1: own to someone else, that's jealousy. So now that we 63 00:03:22,639 --> 00:03:25,000 Speaker 1: know the difference between jealousy and envy. Well, the next 64 00:03:25,080 --> 00:03:28,720 Speaker 1: question is our women more jealous than men? Because I 65 00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:30,880 Speaker 1: think that that's a cultural stereotype. It that I at 66 00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:33,320 Speaker 1: least hear a lot sure, And I found on AskMen 67 00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:36,040 Speaker 1: dot Com that my cultural will go to for men 68 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:40,800 Speaker 1: the top time, top ten sign, she's psychotically jealous. There's 69 00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:43,240 Speaker 1: not any sort of equivalent for males on cosmos. So 70 00:03:43,280 --> 00:03:44,960 Speaker 1: I think that it's more a problem that men worry 71 00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:47,560 Speaker 1: about um in terms of their ladies than vice versa. 72 00:03:47,720 --> 00:03:50,920 Speaker 1: What's the number one sign just out of curiosity? It's 73 00:03:51,040 --> 00:03:54,200 Speaker 1: she keeps tabs on you. For example, if your man 74 00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:57,080 Speaker 1: comes in and says that he was late because of traffic, 75 00:03:57,240 --> 00:04:00,920 Speaker 1: and then you get on the computer to check traffic reports. Um, 76 00:04:00,960 --> 00:04:04,160 Speaker 1: that's a sign apparently that you're psychotically jealous. M hmm. 77 00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:08,080 Speaker 1: But you know, while that's sort of um aggravating behavior 78 00:04:08,160 --> 00:04:10,680 Speaker 1: that ask men dot Com recommends that men get rid 79 00:04:10,720 --> 00:04:14,160 Speaker 1: of jealousy is actually pretty hard to study. Um, you know, 80 00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:16,200 Speaker 1: it's hard to do sort of a long range study 81 00:04:16,320 --> 00:04:19,919 Speaker 1: about an emotion like this. But right now, the theory 82 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:22,719 Speaker 1: is that women are more inclined to be jealous because 83 00:04:22,960 --> 00:04:25,719 Speaker 1: this is sort of a compliment. We're more honest and 84 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:28,359 Speaker 1: in touch with our emotions than males. And I have 85 00:04:28,440 --> 00:04:32,760 Speaker 1: to take a point though, with that, with that rationale 86 00:04:32,760 --> 00:04:35,360 Speaker 1: behind women being more jealous, because I think just because 87 00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:37,560 Speaker 1: we might be more inclined to be in touch with 88 00:04:37,600 --> 00:04:40,839 Speaker 1: our emotions and express jealousy, I don't think that in 89 00:04:40,880 --> 00:04:47,919 Speaker 1: any way that means that we experience jealousy more than men. UM. Well, 90 00:04:47,960 --> 00:04:50,000 Speaker 1: you know, you might be onto something because men and 91 00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:52,440 Speaker 1: women get jealous over the same thing. They have the 92 00:04:52,520 --> 00:04:57,000 Speaker 1: same jealousy triggers. Basically, anything valuable to them is going 93 00:04:57,080 --> 00:05:00,920 Speaker 1: to trigger jealousy. One difference, though, that people have noted, 94 00:05:01,040 --> 00:05:05,120 Speaker 1: is that when let's say relationship is threatened, women are 95 00:05:05,160 --> 00:05:07,840 Speaker 1: more likely to aim their jealous behavior at the other 96 00:05:07,880 --> 00:05:10,760 Speaker 1: women than at their partner as a way to sort 97 00:05:10,800 --> 00:05:15,200 Speaker 1: of protect their relationship by getting rid of all known enemies, right, 98 00:05:15,680 --> 00:05:18,839 Speaker 1: And those results tend tend to stay the same across 99 00:05:19,040 --> 00:05:21,520 Speaker 1: younger age groups as well. That that study was dealing 100 00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:26,680 Speaker 1: with jealousy and adult women. The similar study of ninth 101 00:05:26,720 --> 00:05:32,520 Speaker 1: graders found that UM girls have higher standards of loyalty, kindness, empathy, 102 00:05:32,600 --> 00:05:37,000 Speaker 1: and commitment than boys, and so they exhibited more jealousy 103 00:05:37,080 --> 00:05:40,960 Speaker 1: towards um friendship relationships as well. Right, So if you 104 00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:42,760 Speaker 1: know you're supposed to go shopping with your friend and 105 00:05:42,839 --> 00:05:44,599 Speaker 1: all of a sudden she shows up, but another friend, 106 00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:48,000 Speaker 1: this higher level of loyalty and commitment feels violated and 107 00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:49,720 Speaker 1: you act out in a jealous way as opposed to 108 00:05:49,760 --> 00:05:51,920 Speaker 1: have like a guy shows up with another guy, they're 109 00:05:51,920 --> 00:05:54,960 Speaker 1: more likely just all go shopping together to the arcade. 110 00:05:55,760 --> 00:05:58,640 Speaker 1: So why do you think that this is smally, why 111 00:05:58,640 --> 00:06:01,160 Speaker 1: do you think that they're these under ring gender differences 112 00:06:01,279 --> 00:06:06,680 Speaker 1: between jealousy and men and women. Hormones, that's our answer 113 00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:10,479 Speaker 1: to everything. It's actually not hormones. According to some of 114 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:15,120 Speaker 1: the older studies about gender differences and jealousy, scientists used 115 00:06:15,120 --> 00:06:21,000 Speaker 1: to just chalk it all up to natural selection, evolution, evolution. Yeah, Basically, 116 00:06:21,040 --> 00:06:26,440 Speaker 1: the rationale was that women were more um emotionally jealous 117 00:06:26,440 --> 00:06:30,200 Speaker 1: and romantic relationships because they wanted to prevent the resource 118 00:06:30,279 --> 00:06:33,440 Speaker 1: loss of you know, the man straying and um being 119 00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:37,240 Speaker 1: unfaithful hook to her, whereas men's jealousy triggers or focus 120 00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:41,520 Speaker 1: more on physical infidelity in order to prevent um, you know, 121 00:06:41,839 --> 00:06:47,000 Speaker 1: in order to protect there I guess, um, reproductive success. Right, 122 00:06:47,279 --> 00:06:50,000 Speaker 1: they can't have their women running around and being impregnated 123 00:06:50,040 --> 00:06:55,160 Speaker 1: by everyone. But these those types of theories have largely 124 00:06:55,200 --> 00:06:58,080 Speaker 1: been discredited because of like you said, jealousy is a 125 00:06:58,120 --> 00:07:01,800 Speaker 1: really difficult emotion to you to actually study, because it's 126 00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:07,400 Speaker 1: a pretty complex combination of fear, shame, anger, self esteem, 127 00:07:07,600 --> 00:07:10,640 Speaker 1: and just general life events at all maybe lead up 128 00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:13,760 Speaker 1: to adult patterns of jealousy. Right, But you know, I 129 00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:16,720 Speaker 1: know one guy who would say that, um, we can 130 00:07:16,840 --> 00:07:20,960 Speaker 1: track a specific moment at which women might start acting 131 00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:23,800 Speaker 1: a little bit more jealousy. Would that be Sigmund Freud? 132 00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:27,560 Speaker 1: It would apparently. Old Sigmund has a theory that you've 133 00:07:27,560 --> 00:07:30,760 Speaker 1: probably heard of called penis envy, which is when the 134 00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:35,000 Speaker 1: female envy's male characteristics are capabilities, especially the possession of 135 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:37,760 Speaker 1: a penis. So as soon as young girls figure out 136 00:07:37,760 --> 00:07:39,480 Speaker 1: that they don't have a penis, they spend the rest 137 00:07:39,520 --> 00:07:43,920 Speaker 1: of their life over compensating for it. And Old Sigmund's 138 00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:49,480 Speaker 1: theory has also been pretty widely discredited, beginning um particularly 139 00:07:49,520 --> 00:07:52,280 Speaker 1: in the nineteen seventies with the with the feminist movement. 140 00:07:52,760 --> 00:07:55,440 Speaker 1: At some point, if if Sigmund Freud's penis MV theory 141 00:07:55,520 --> 00:07:58,800 Speaker 1: was correct, that would mean that girls would have to 142 00:07:59,040 --> 00:08:02,640 Speaker 1: understand and be able to relate to the experience of 143 00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:07,200 Speaker 1: having a penis, which is kind of impossible. But isn't 144 00:08:07,240 --> 00:08:09,320 Speaker 1: that Isn't that what he's saying The whole root of 145 00:08:09,320 --> 00:08:12,480 Speaker 1: our deficiency is, and that's why we're so compelled to 146 00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:17,280 Speaker 1: have children and overcompensate in other areas well. Molly, I 147 00:08:17,320 --> 00:08:21,840 Speaker 1: think that um, Stigmund Freud's kind of concept about women 148 00:08:21,880 --> 00:08:26,840 Speaker 1: having to overcompensate is sort of not valid these days, 149 00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:30,200 Speaker 1: because women really don't have to. Um. You know, there 150 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:33,440 Speaker 1: are more options open to us to you know, make 151 00:08:33,440 --> 00:08:37,360 Speaker 1: our own way rather than just bearing children. So um. 152 00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:40,440 Speaker 1: And another study in two thous published in two thousand 153 00:08:40,559 --> 00:08:45,120 Speaker 1: four in UH the Journal of Evolutionary Psychology, found that 154 00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:50,480 Speaker 1: when asked about sexual versus emotional infidelity, both men and 155 00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:55,280 Speaker 1: women reported more jealousy about their partners emotional infidelity. So 156 00:08:55,320 --> 00:08:58,200 Speaker 1: it looks like at some point this whole idea of 157 00:08:58,200 --> 00:09:03,080 Speaker 1: women being the more jealous set isn't necessarily true. It 158 00:09:03,120 --> 00:09:06,240 Speaker 1: all kind of evens out, is what you're saying. Well, 159 00:09:06,240 --> 00:09:09,200 Speaker 1: we've been talking a lot, mainly about romantic jealousy, but 160 00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:11,000 Speaker 1: there are a few other types of jealousy we should 161 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:15,360 Speaker 1: probably mention. Um, it's very common. Sibling rivalry all comes 162 00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:18,560 Speaker 1: from jealousy of your siblings, and that's perfectly normal and natural. 163 00:09:18,640 --> 00:09:21,560 Speaker 1: Unfortunately there's not much you can do about it. Um, 164 00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:23,959 Speaker 1: there's also work jealousy. I mean, if Kristen were to 165 00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:26,960 Speaker 1: find a new partner for this podcast, I'd be extremely jealous. 166 00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:31,560 Speaker 1: And then, um, there's friend jealousy that we kind of 167 00:09:31,559 --> 00:09:33,760 Speaker 1: talked about earlier with the with the studies of the 168 00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:36,360 Speaker 1: ninth graders with you know, if you think that a 169 00:09:36,440 --> 00:09:39,600 Speaker 1: friendship is in jeopardy, you'll become jealous if you know, 170 00:09:39,640 --> 00:09:42,000 Speaker 1: so your best friend starts hanging out with with a 171 00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:44,640 Speaker 1: new girl or God, if you found a new friend, 172 00:09:44,679 --> 00:09:48,880 Speaker 1: I'd beat jealous Christens. And then there is family jealousy, 173 00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:52,000 Speaker 1: which I think ties into sibling rivalry and things like 174 00:09:52,040 --> 00:09:55,000 Speaker 1: that if you think that one, um, you know sibling 175 00:09:55,440 --> 00:09:57,960 Speaker 1: is being favored by parents more than you. Yeah, and 176 00:09:58,040 --> 00:10:00,360 Speaker 1: especially in blended families, there's gonna be some thing that's 177 00:10:00,480 --> 00:10:03,240 Speaker 1: very tricky to navigate when you know new families are 178 00:10:03,240 --> 00:10:06,079 Speaker 1: coming together and they're sort of competition for a stepfather's 179 00:10:06,080 --> 00:10:08,360 Speaker 1: time and things like that, and I think the thing 180 00:10:08,360 --> 00:10:11,080 Speaker 1: to remember about jealousy when we're going over all these 181 00:10:11,120 --> 00:10:13,560 Speaker 1: different types of it is the fact that jealousy is 182 00:10:13,559 --> 00:10:19,119 Speaker 1: a very innate human emotion. Um. There's evidence of um, 183 00:10:19,360 --> 00:10:23,120 Speaker 1: jealous feelings in children as young as six months old. 184 00:10:23,320 --> 00:10:25,360 Speaker 1: I mean, I think that it's something that that we're 185 00:10:25,360 --> 00:10:29,480 Speaker 1: almost born with. But um, even though it's a natural 186 00:10:29,559 --> 00:10:33,040 Speaker 1: emotion for ux to experience, it can tend towards the 187 00:10:33,080 --> 00:10:37,280 Speaker 1: abnormal side, psychotically jealous, as ask men dot Com would 188 00:10:37,280 --> 00:10:39,199 Speaker 1: put it, right, although that's probably a little bit of 189 00:10:39,200 --> 00:10:43,560 Speaker 1: an exaggeration, right, but I mean, people do exhibit abnormal jealousy. UM. 190 00:10:43,559 --> 00:10:46,360 Speaker 1: And this you know, you know for better for where 191 00:10:46,400 --> 00:10:51,920 Speaker 1: some of these issues are tied to women, like extreme insecurity, UM, immaturity. 192 00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:53,559 Speaker 1: I'm not going to count them because most women, I 193 00:10:53,600 --> 00:10:56,160 Speaker 1: think I'm mature, but being a control freak. I mean, 194 00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:58,360 Speaker 1: that's something that sometimes we associate with women is they've 195 00:10:58,360 --> 00:11:00,760 Speaker 1: got to have things their way, and when doesn't happen, 196 00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:03,559 Speaker 1: then jealousy can occur. Right. And the higher students of 197 00:11:03,600 --> 00:11:06,400 Speaker 1: body image cultural standards like that I think can also 198 00:11:06,480 --> 00:11:09,960 Speaker 1: play a big role. But the good thing about jealousy 199 00:11:10,080 --> 00:11:14,240 Speaker 1: is that when experienced sort of in a normal scenario, 200 00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:19,480 Speaker 1: it can drive you to kind of accomplish greater things, 201 00:11:19,520 --> 00:11:22,320 Speaker 1: sort of like anger can be a useful emotion. It 202 00:11:22,320 --> 00:11:24,720 Speaker 1: can be a very motivating force if you use it 203 00:11:24,720 --> 00:11:26,440 Speaker 1: for the right reasons, if you use your powers for 204 00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:28,920 Speaker 1: good and not evil. Right. If you, for instance, with 205 00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:31,839 Speaker 1: workplace jealousy, if I think that one of my co 206 00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:34,080 Speaker 1: workers is going to be up for promotion that I 207 00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:37,320 Speaker 1: think that i'm due instead, that will probably make me 208 00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:40,560 Speaker 1: come into work earlier, get more done, get my boss's 209 00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:44,559 Speaker 1: attention more hopefully in good ways. Um, that will make 210 00:11:44,559 --> 00:11:48,120 Speaker 1: me compete more for for that promotion. Right. And it's 211 00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:51,800 Speaker 1: really more interpersonal jealousy within friendships and relationships that can 212 00:11:51,840 --> 00:11:54,160 Speaker 1: be a little harder to navigate. And the advice we 213 00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:56,160 Speaker 1: have for that is kind of simple. It may not 214 00:11:56,200 --> 00:11:59,160 Speaker 1: always sound like the most practical advice, um, but it's 215 00:11:59,280 --> 00:12:01,160 Speaker 1: it's pretty reckon and buy experts that if you do 216 00:12:01,280 --> 00:12:04,679 Speaker 1: have jealousy that's sort of interfering with your relationship with someone, 217 00:12:05,040 --> 00:12:06,560 Speaker 1: you really just have to sit and talk it out 218 00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:10,280 Speaker 1: and explain what's making you upset, um, how you can 219 00:12:10,320 --> 00:12:12,320 Speaker 1: deal with it. And I think that's what the quiz 220 00:12:12,360 --> 00:12:14,240 Speaker 1: that we were talking about earlier was trying to get 221 00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:16,800 Speaker 1: at um with some of their options, even though a 222 00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:18,439 Speaker 1: few of them were things that were kind of silly, 223 00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:22,559 Speaker 1: like eating the crap out of another woman. Yeah um. 224 00:12:22,600 --> 00:12:26,760 Speaker 1: Over being overly aggressive or completely passive aggressive not healthy 225 00:12:26,800 --> 00:12:30,680 Speaker 1: with good ideas to Jella Chelsea. So if you want 226 00:12:30,679 --> 00:12:34,720 Speaker 1: to learn more about jealousy and the other complex human emotions, 227 00:12:34,960 --> 00:12:38,280 Speaker 1: you can go read about that on how stuff works 228 00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:44,720 Speaker 1: dot com. For more on this and thousands of other topics. 229 00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:51,920 Speaker 1: Is it how stuff works dot Com brought to you 230 00:12:51,960 --> 00:12:55,320 Speaker 1: by the reinvented two thousand twelve Camray. It's ready, are 231 00:12:55,360 --> 00:12:55,560 Speaker 1: you