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Speaker 1: At what point were you like, I'm going to teach

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Speaker 1: women how to breathe and how to heal themselves, and

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Speaker 1: this is what I want to do.

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Speaker 2: This is not something I ever said I want to

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Speaker 2: do this. It was something that came to me, like

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Speaker 2: the purpose was put on me. I always say the

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Speaker 2: breath tells on you. I can look at someone's body

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Speaker 2: and see what they may be dealing with emotionally, just

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Speaker 2: where the breath is trapped. Right, Some people, even in

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Speaker 2: attempt to take a full inhale next sale, can't. Most

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Speaker 2: people have this huge fear that if they allow themselves

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Speaker 2: to go to the bottom, they won't be able to

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Speaker 2: get it back up.

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Speaker 1: Heyba, fam, I feel the need to be doing this

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Speaker 1: right now, and you're going to find out why. I

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Speaker 1: am taking some deep breaths, some deep soothing breaths today

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Speaker 1: because I happen to have an incredible woman here to

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Speaker 1: join us today. And her name is Jasmine Marie. Jasminrie

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Speaker 1: is the author of a recently published book called Black

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Speaker 1: Girls Breathing, Heal from Trauma, calmbat, Chronic Stress, and Find

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Speaker 1: You or Freedom. But Jasmine has in her own right

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Speaker 1: such an incredible career entrepreneurship, business financial Journey, which I

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Speaker 1: hope you're cool with me getting into because we are

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Speaker 1: called Brown Ambition. We do love centering women of color

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Speaker 1: at the conversations about wealth building and thriving and how

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Speaker 1: it can all work together. And in this book, Jasmine

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Speaker 1: offers tools, some personal experiences as well from her training,

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Speaker 1: from her life and just tools that we can use

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Speaker 1: to cope.

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Speaker 3: And I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's I'm writing a book right now, y'all

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Speaker 1: know that, ba fan, But it's hard to predict and

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Speaker 1: you can't predict when your book is going to come out,

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Speaker 1: what's going to be happening in the world. And all

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Speaker 1: I can say is it was divinity that made you publish,

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Speaker 1: that got you to publish this book at a time

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Speaker 1: like this when if there's one thing we need it

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Speaker 1: is a wu freakin saw.

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Speaker 3: Also, she's my sister from Atlanta. Grady baby in the house.

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Speaker 3: Oh stop, we're from Atlanta. To stop it. If you

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Speaker 3: were born at.

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Speaker 1: Grady, you can say you were born you were born

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Speaker 1: in Atlanta. Wait, hater, I was born at South Fulfon

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Speaker 1: County Hospital.

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Speaker 3: Get out of here. Are we going to start? Listen?

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Speaker 1: If it's not my black card. People try to come

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Speaker 1: from my Atlanta card every time. What number texted you

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Speaker 1: before this interview? What number was it?

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Speaker 3: What was it?

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Speaker 1: Let's hear and while you're checking, I will remind you

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Speaker 1: I have lived in New York for fifteen years now.

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Speaker 2: I just left New York.

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Speaker 3: Oh but yeah, four or four baby, I've had that

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Speaker 3: same number since high school.

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Speaker 1: I think I won't. I won't give it up pride

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Speaker 1: out of my cold dead hands. Anyway, that got dark.

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Speaker 1: Welcome Jasmine Marie to the Breath Fish and Podcast.

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Speaker 3: How are you me?

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Speaker 2: I'm okay today, I'm okay. Yeah, I'm okay.

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Speaker 1: I have to say I have two little ones. I

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Speaker 1: know that you don't have kids, and I'm jealous. And

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Speaker 1: I have two little ones. They are five and two.

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Speaker 1: And the morning routine I tell my husband is taking.

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Speaker 3: Years off my life. Years is stressful.

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Speaker 1: And no matter how much you prepare, it can be

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Speaker 1: very stressful to wrangle too tiny humans to get them

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Speaker 1: out the door. And this morning I was doing a lot.

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Speaker 1: I was doing this. I was doing one, two, three, four,

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Speaker 1: Mommy needs to breathe more. And I was just saying

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Speaker 1: that while my to just picture my two year old

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Speaker 1: screaming and screeching in my hands like a cat you

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Speaker 1: try to give a bath to, just kicking like he's like,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to kick her in the nose because I

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Speaker 1: don't want this diaper changed or my socks on my feet.

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Speaker 3: But breathing. Man.

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Speaker 1: And I have to say, I knew obviously I was

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Speaker 1: going to speak to you today, but it was such

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Speaker 1: a good reminder for me in that moment when usually

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Speaker 1: I would get so stressed and then the time it

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Speaker 1: takes for that stress to leave my body after I

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Speaker 1: do drop off. It's just anyway, I just wanted to

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Speaker 1: say that because I even in that moment, it was

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Speaker 1: so helpful to me.

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Speaker 3: So talk to me.

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Speaker 1: About your breathwork journey. How did you get You have

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Speaker 1: a background in business, I know, but at what point

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Speaker 1: were you like, I'm going to teach women how to

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Speaker 1: breathe and how to heal themselves, and this is what

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Speaker 1: I want to do.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, it's interesting, and you mentioned this a

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Speaker 2: bit before we started today, But this is not something

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Speaker 2: I ever said I want to do this. It was

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Speaker 2: something that came to me, like the purpose was put

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Speaker 2: on me, and it was a fight to not want

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Speaker 2: to do this, you know, like so like you said,

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Speaker 2: I started in business. I was working at a global

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Speaker 2: CpG company in haircare and beauty. Young black girl like

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Speaker 2: was taken my taking up space but wearing my braids.

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Speaker 3: I thought I was so revolution.

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Speaker 2: For raised though was and that is it was, you

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Speaker 2: know yeah, but at that company that really didn't care,

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Speaker 2: They're like, oh yeah cool. And was just so taxed

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Speaker 2: from that job. I mean I lived and breathed work.

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Speaker 2: I think that was so common amongst my peers in

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Speaker 2: New York City at the time, and found myself super

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Speaker 2: stressed in looking for tools and happening upon one while

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Speaker 2: volunteering for my church at the time who had just

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Speaker 2: launched a community center and the pastor's personal breath worker

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Speaker 2: was teaching classes.

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Speaker 1: So I took the pastors I listen. I heard that

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Speaker 1: the pastor had a personal breath worker.

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Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, okay, yes, yes, and I yeah, I fell

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Speaker 2: in love with the tool. I fell in love with it.

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Speaker 2: Just gave me the space to make more clear and

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Speaker 2: conscious decisions. Nothing changed in my life. Everything actually worsened

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Speaker 2: around the time. There wasn't any like huge shift, right,

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Speaker 2: It was just giving me more age and see to

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Speaker 2: respond differently to have a different relationship with my body

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Speaker 2: and also my nervous system. And with that training, practice

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Speaker 2: it for six years. After six years of personal practice.

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Speaker 2: Literally you know, got the download that I, you know heard,

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Speaker 2: take the training, and I took the training and followed

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Speaker 2: that journey and then.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the training.

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Speaker 2: So was it breathwork training? Yea, yeah. But we're not

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Speaker 2: going to give the teachers names because they were Unfortunately

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Speaker 2: there was a big wuha around in twenty twenty with

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Speaker 2: their practices and how they went about it and at

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Speaker 2: not being what's the word experience. It wasn't relevant, the

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Speaker 2: tools weren't relevant to our community. Yet they were teaching

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Speaker 2: this work. Give it much energy because the work I

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Speaker 2: use is from working with tens of thousands and corporate spaces,

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Speaker 2: specifically with the black community, juvenile thet tension centers. Like,

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Speaker 2: I've just been in the work in a way that

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Speaker 2: the industry hasn't seen the work. And that's the data

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Speaker 2: and value that I go off on when it comes

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Speaker 2: to my practice now. But yeah, after my training, I

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Speaker 2: in the group training, it came to me black girl's

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Speaker 2: breathing and I just I was like, okay, hen this

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Speaker 2: was what I introduced, Oh, I'm going to do Black

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Speaker 2: Girls Breathing. And we had our first virtual and in

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Speaker 2: person sessions January twenty nineteen. And it was interesting, right

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Speaker 2: that timing right before COVID, the virtual really took off. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and we got lots of exposure from that from that work,

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Speaker 2: and it grew significantly in a pace that I didn't

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Speaker 2: grow my care plan. So it wasn't like I wasn't

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Speaker 2: taking care of myself. It was just that, like most

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Speaker 2: of us, experience, that trajectorates, you know, catches us off

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Speaker 2: guard a bit, and we're having to really check in

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Speaker 2: how do I care for my body at this level?

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Speaker 2: And that was some learning that lagged for me, and

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Speaker 2: so I had the effects of you know, that secondary

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Speaker 2: trunk and exposure from the work that I wasn't necessarily

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Speaker 2: using the tools to care for myself and ended up

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Speaker 2: impacting my own health further. But yeah, that's how I

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Speaker 2: got a breath work. I did a whole merry go round.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, there's a lot of things I want to touch on,

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Speaker 1: but I want to go back. You said that when

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Speaker 1: you started this breath work through your pastor and the

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Speaker 1: fact that he had a breath work teacher just stuck

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Speaker 1: out to me because I mean, growing up in the South,

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Speaker 1: it's like, you know, if there's no problem God can't fix,

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Speaker 1: and like it's sort of almost limiting, can feel isolating

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Speaker 1: sometimes if you're just told to pray it out, you know.

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Speaker 1: And the fact that there's an acknowledgment that there's tools

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Speaker 1: that we have to handle life's challenges and yes, of

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Speaker 1: course faith, but that these tools can living tandem with

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Speaker 1: that faith is an important message. I think just want

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Speaker 1: to highlight that.

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Speaker 3: Now.

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Speaker 1: I want to know about you pre this, because you've

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Speaker 1: had a couple different lives. You use a very scary

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Speaker 1: way to describe yourself with I think it's scary because

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Speaker 1: usually it's like serial killers. But then somehow we started

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Speaker 1: saying serial entrepreneurs. So I always get a little when

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Speaker 1: I hear it. But you're a businesswoman, So can you

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Speaker 1: talk about your your career in business and what you

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Speaker 1: were doing before BGB.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: So, immediately after leaving my corporate job in New York City,

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Speaker 2: I started a marketing consultancy. I was working with mid

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Speaker 2: sized businesses VC firms. I helped launch the first co

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Speaker 2: living space in the Southeast. I did all the marketing

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Speaker 2: research for all of that, and the marketing strategy.

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Speaker 1: A co living space is that you know, co working was.

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Speaker 2: Like booming, yeahing was really booming in New York City

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Speaker 2: and San France. You know, I have all these tech

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Speaker 2: hubs where the spaces are smaller and there's more community,

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Speaker 2: right shared spaces, and so this VC wanted to launch

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Speaker 2: one in the Southeast and I worked on that project.

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Speaker 2: That was one of my one of my clients there.

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Speaker 2: I just built my portfolio. I would say it was

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Speaker 2: successful to me at the time because it replaced myself

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Speaker 2: galary and I kept the same lifestyle for me. That

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Speaker 2: was success. I used all those learnings to launch my

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Speaker 2: second business that didn't do well. It failed to left

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Speaker 2: me with debt. And that was a millennial and I

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Speaker 2: feel like I was too early because there's people doing

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Speaker 2: it now. But I'm a millennial in gen Z consultancy

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Speaker 2: where I wanted to work with HR departments and helping

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Speaker 2: to engage and retain that demographic. So working with campus

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Speaker 2: recruiting all of that too. Really excited though, and made

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Speaker 2: some amazing connections that I ended up using for BGB

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Speaker 2: once I launched that. But yeah, that's my entrepreneurial journey,

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Speaker 2: lots of ups and downs and learnings, not anything that

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Speaker 2: I happened upon. I think others saw it in me,

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Speaker 2: for I ever saw that in myself. I wanted. I

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Speaker 2: am a great worker. I'm a great number two person.

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Speaker 2: I love to be behind the scenes, which is seems

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Speaker 2: weird given where I am now, but that's my comfort

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Speaker 2: right well. I can put my head down and work,

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Speaker 2: and so that's not where life took me. I remember

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Speaker 2: I actually had a NBA mentor at NYU and I

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Speaker 2: was telling him my postgrad plans. I was like, yes,

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Speaker 2: and I'm gonna work on this project and already have

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Speaker 2: this brand idea and product idea and mine I'm gonna

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Speaker 2: pitch this when I get in there. I'm gonna make

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Speaker 2: director in five years. And he was like, so, you're

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Speaker 2: gonna be an entrepreneur and I was like, where did

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Speaker 2: she get that from. I was like, no, I'm going

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Speaker 2: to rise the ranks in this corporate environment. And he

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Speaker 2: was like okay, and then I'll never forget. I circled

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Speaker 2: back to him after I left this started my first company.

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Speaker 2: I was like, thank you for telling me that. I

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Speaker 2: don't know what possessed you to see that in me

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Speaker 2: and tell me and see that in me. But thank you.

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Speaker 2: And so I think the others saw before I did that.

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Speaker 1: I wish someone had said that to me, because I

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Speaker 1: had the same attitude. We're not made for corporate. Well

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Speaker 1: you said you left corporate. Was it because you felt

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Speaker 1: like you had sort of reached that limit of what

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Speaker 1: you could accomplish there and you were just ready to

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Speaker 1: do it on your own terms.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. It was very interesting. Is I actually got a

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Speaker 2: new director, black woman, and so I had this a

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Speaker 2: most of director and I saw her and her life

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Speaker 2: and and not in a way that was you know,

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Speaker 2: like oh, that's a bad life, but the reality of

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Speaker 2: being a director as a black woman. I saw what

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Speaker 2: she was experiencing and I said, I don't want that.

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Speaker 3: And that's not even that high up, like I mean,

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Speaker 3: it's mid right.

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Speaker 2: Well, I think for this corporate structure.

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Speaker 1: It was yeah, you're right, there's different structures.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, she was over many global brands, okay, gotcha, So

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Speaker 2: it was high up and I just saw her experience

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Speaker 2: and I was just like, I don't want that. And

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Speaker 2: there were other things that were going on at the

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Speaker 2: time as far as the stress levels of the job.

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Speaker 2: That just it was of no interest to me anymore. Also,

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Speaker 2: you know, personally just you know, young and dumb relationships, right,

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Speaker 2: and left New York City to whatever.

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Speaker 3: But no, let's go to that whatever. Take me to

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Speaker 3: whatever land.

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Speaker 2: Whatever land is.

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Speaker 3: It's a part of the journey.

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Speaker 2: Journey, Yes, that's so a part of the journey. But

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Speaker 2: I left in New York City. Actually it didn't really

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Speaker 2: leave for the relationship. It was the job. We weren't

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Speaker 2: together the time. I moved back to Atlanta briefly, and

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Speaker 2: then we did get back together, and I moved to

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Speaker 2: Tennessee to work on the relationship, and you know, see

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Speaker 2: where it could take us.

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Speaker 3: But gave it a shot, tried gave it a shot.

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Speaker 2: Were some there were, of course, looking back, right, and

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Speaker 2: we can all do this, and sometimes we need to

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Speaker 2: be careful when we do that. Look back with new information.

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Speaker 2: And I mentioned this in the book, not punishing ourselves

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Speaker 2: for new family our former selves, right, of course, looking

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Speaker 2: back and see the ways in which I was choosing

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Speaker 2: out of my wounded place, choosing a partner out of

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Speaker 2: my wounded place. What a relationship looked like to me,

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Speaker 2: or you know, an ideal partner or missing some of

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Speaker 2: the red flags because of conditioning, growing up right, and

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Speaker 2: some of those childhood bombs. So looking back, if like wow,

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Speaker 2: like you know, like young and I'm like, oh, there's

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Speaker 2: so many blinders, but they are grateful for the lessons

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Speaker 2: never have to repeat those mistakes again, which is you know,

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Speaker 2: the gold and.

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Speaker 3: That's the human experience.

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Speaker 1: Life is just one series of blind leaps of faith

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Speaker 1: and just like learning from those experiences and then having

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Speaker 1: the wisdom to like to look back and not judge

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Speaker 1: or shame yourself, but to use that information and like

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Speaker 1: how can we grow? It's kind of like in your business, right,

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Speaker 1: I mean every business that the businesses that you've launched,

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Speaker 1: like you said, like you were able to use contacts

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Speaker 1: from the one that wasn't as maybe financially successful into

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Speaker 1: now your third business and you're learning things now for

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Speaker 1: what could be your next business or the next iteration

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Speaker 1: of BGB. And I feel the same. I think it's

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Speaker 1: all one. But it's just a story we tell ourselves, right.

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Speaker 1: It's like can say we've failed in business, or we

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Speaker 1: failed relationships, or oh I learned a lot, and it's

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Speaker 1: that reframing. I know you get that because you talk

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Speaker 1: about it in the book, and it's just harder sometimes

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Speaker 1: to do that with ourselves.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: The one thing I will add, though, is that I

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Speaker 2: wish for black women specifically and black women and men

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Speaker 2: to be able to have the opportunity to learn differently.

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Speaker 2: I do think our learning, unfortunately just systemic. You know,

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Speaker 2: racism has come with so much trauma. I don't want

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Speaker 2: us to have to have that much of a pain tolerance.

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Speaker 1: Hey, ba fam, We're going to take a quick break,

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Speaker 1: pay some bills, and we'll be right back. All right,

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Speaker 1: ba fam, We're back.

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Speaker 2: And so and that's just due to the trauma individual, societal, generational, right.

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Speaker 2: But I want us to be able to learn with

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Speaker 2: less pain. Sometimes you don't have its have to have

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Speaker 2: as much pain with those the learnings. And so that's

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Speaker 2: my only wish.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, oh girl, I get it. I got two little

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Speaker 1: kids I'm raising. I am deep in that. Am I

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Speaker 1: this amazing because I had to suffer and like, should

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Speaker 1: I make sure that they have a little friction in there,

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Speaker 1: you know? And I think that's such a such a Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I take that point. I agree. It's it's that balance.

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Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, one hundred percent. Well, let's pivot into

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Speaker 1: We talked a little bit about your your business journey.

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Speaker 3: But where did that.

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Speaker 1: Entrepreneurial spirit come from? I know you said a professor

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Speaker 1: in business school was the one who saw the entrepreneurial

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Speaker 1: drive from you. But growing up in the a or

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Speaker 1: round about, like, where did that? How did your upbringing

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Speaker 1: lead you to this path?

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Speaker 3: Do you think you know? I don't.

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Speaker 2: I will say maybe subconsciously. My grandfather who was entrepreneurial

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Speaker 2: and he really wanted to buy some land up in

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Speaker 2: Michigan where he's from, and couldn't make certain decision at

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Speaker 2: the time. We have a whole family. He was raising

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Speaker 2: my great great great it pics four times great grandfather.

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Speaker 2: It's an interesting story. My mom wants to write a

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Speaker 2: book round it, so I want to it completely. But

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Speaker 2: ended up leaving moving to Arkansas and getting land and

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Speaker 2: rice fields that are still in the family name. Wow,

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Speaker 2: but it goes to the boys, so you have to

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Speaker 2: have the you know, the lastame with the boys.

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Speaker 3: But oh, is that law in Arkansas or it's.

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Speaker 2: Just I think that was just how it is written. Whatever,

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Speaker 2: trust or what have you like, you know, to make

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Speaker 2: sure it stays in the family, stays in the family name,

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Speaker 2: and so there's that. But my grandfather never had the

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Speaker 2: opportunity because of racism. Right. He was so smart. He

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Speaker 2: would write, he would write. My grandfather would pick up

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Speaker 2: books and just write different op eds on them. He

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Speaker 2: would submit them to the paper. You know what I

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Speaker 2: mean to have his little authod's. He was just such

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Speaker 2: Oh wow, man. He worked in a factory. You know,

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Speaker 2: that's the the extent of what the world would allow

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Speaker 2: him to, you know, expand to in his world. But

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Speaker 2: I think all of this is his things he's planted realized. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I never really again, I never really saw myself going

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Speaker 2: into entrepreneurship. I don't have And here's the thing I

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Speaker 2: want to say too. I see a lot of people

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Speaker 2: jumping into entrepreneurship because of their wounds. A lot of

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Speaker 2: us haven't been seen in traditional settings, and we end

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Speaker 2: up wanting to get into especially like I want to say,

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Speaker 2: this kind of business wellness. It's like I wasn't seen.

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Speaker 2: I want to make space for other people to feel seen.

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Speaker 2: And I don't necessarily recommend that being the place and

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Speaker 2: that you build, you're going to experience ten times more

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Speaker 2: trauma intensel you don't like, Yes, I experence, maybe some

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Speaker 2: things in the workplace, but I look like even younger

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Speaker 2: than I am walking up to these corporations pitching them.

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Speaker 2: What do you think that I experienced them? I was

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Speaker 2: at a recently, at a networking event. I was like,

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Speaker 2: I realized that I don't even like telling people what

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Speaker 2: I do before, you know, anything, because it's so unbelievable

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Speaker 2: that I don't like feeling that energy, that projection, and

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Speaker 2: it's mostly like this face that people make out I

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Speaker 2: laugh with what, oh, okay, you know what.

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Speaker 1: That's fine, doesn't sound like a real business to them,

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Speaker 1: or like.

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Speaker 2: Like I'm real, Like oh, I wrote a book and

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Speaker 2: people are like, oh, it's on Amazon, and I'm like,

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Speaker 2: it is, you know, but also in bookstores across the country.

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Speaker 2: But I don't feel the need to do all that.

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Speaker 1: I feel very comforted, you know, not going to the

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Speaker 1: right networking events. But I know that that no, I

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Speaker 1: mean not a dig I.

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Speaker 2: Go I've I would say that my experience as a

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Speaker 2: young appear even young than what I appear, innovative minded

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Speaker 2: black woman, I face a lot of that going to

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Speaker 2: these environments. Having had large corporate partners, the leading banks

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Speaker 2: in the world, writing checks to black girls breathing like

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Speaker 2: I'm going to face some of that, right, So yeah, anyways,

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Speaker 2: I don't know how I got that entrepreneur journey, but yeah.

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Speaker 3: I brought you there.

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Speaker 1: Well, I mean no, I think that's often something that

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Speaker 1: guests will say, especially you know, I mean, are you

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Speaker 1: still living the solopreneur kind of like life or do

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Speaker 1: you have a team?

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Speaker 2: And if you have a team, I have a team, Okay,

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Speaker 2: And even that I think people get to I recommend

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Speaker 2: people lean team, lean team until it makes sense to

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Speaker 2: expand all your sense systems in process. I think sometimes

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Speaker 2: entrepreneurs get caught up in like having this big team

399
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Speaker 2: and like do you need that? We have text acts,

400
00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:52,440
Speaker 2: we have you know, systems, like only have what you need.

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Speaker 2: We've been around for six years, right, I've seen COVID,

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Speaker 2: I've seen you know, money EI shrinking and have been

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Speaker 2: able to grasp in those periods. So there's just lots

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Speaker 2: I've seen and I'm like, just you know, work on

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Speaker 2: what works best for you. Don't look into the appearance

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Speaker 2: of things. Is that's how a lot of people get

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Speaker 2: caught up. And I've talked to other founders who should

408
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Speaker 2: have reduced you know, a long time ago, but we're

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Speaker 2: so caught up in how things looked and how that

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Speaker 2: would appear, you know, I'm like, no, you do, it's

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Speaker 2: best for that for that P and L.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I mean my team is I have a virtual assistant,

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Speaker 1: I have an editor for the podcast, and then I

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Speaker 1: have me myself and I and a bunch of systems

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Speaker 1: and tools. And that's just how it's going to be

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Speaker 1: for a while, and I'm good with that. It's a

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Speaker 1: huge responsibility to bring on staff. It's it's like, well damn.

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Speaker 1: I mean that's especially in the first you know, a

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Speaker 1: few years of business. I know you know this well,

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Speaker 1: but the financial volatility of it all. I mean there's

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Speaker 1: months I have launched my business where it's like, are

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Speaker 1: we going to do the mortgage and the daycare this month?

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Speaker 3: Like without dipping into in a retirement fund. We don't

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Speaker 3: want to do that.

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Speaker 1: How did you I mean, I know your first business

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Speaker 1: you said it was a marketing consultancy, but how were

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Speaker 1: you like funding your businesses? Was it personal funding to

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Speaker 1: start with? Have you ever brought on investors?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: So first business, there was no need for any kind

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Speaker 2: of investment money right, service based business priging retainers to

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Speaker 2: and then also you know, being specific with my ideal clients,

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Speaker 2: like these clients can afford certain retainers monthly for two

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Speaker 2: years plus, and I may take on a smaller project

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Speaker 2: here and there, but I have that consistent income. So

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Speaker 2: that was the basis for the first business. I didn't

437
00:22:50,600 --> 00:22:54,720
Speaker 2: really need that much startup capital for that. For BGB,

438
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:57,560
Speaker 2: I started off with like five thousand of my own

439
00:22:57,600 --> 00:23:02,479
Speaker 2: personal savings and have since we've gotten grant funding. I

440
00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:06,360
Speaker 2: have no investors. I made the decision when was it

441
00:23:06,480 --> 00:23:11,960
Speaker 2: twenty twenty three to stop pursuing and having conversations around

442
00:23:12,000 --> 00:23:13,080
Speaker 2: funding with investors.

443
00:23:13,840 --> 00:23:15,840
Speaker 3: Oh okay, yeah, it.

444
00:23:15,920 --> 00:23:19,240
Speaker 2: Didn't make sense. It didn't make sense. I mean, I

445
00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:22,600
Speaker 2: think a huge part of being a black founder is

446
00:23:23,400 --> 00:23:27,800
Speaker 2: tailoring your exposure level to just like the BS, like

447
00:23:28,160 --> 00:23:31,280
Speaker 2: if you, I don't have to expose myself to I'm

448
00:23:31,280 --> 00:23:34,679
Speaker 2: not walking into these meetings mostly with there being a

449
00:23:34,720 --> 00:23:38,679
Speaker 2: curiosity for what we're doing. That's mostly I'm having to

450
00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:41,240
Speaker 2: pitch against their defensiveness. Already They've already made up in

451
00:23:41,280 --> 00:23:44,560
Speaker 2: their minds the extent of what this could be what

452
00:23:44,600 --> 00:23:46,760
Speaker 2: it is, and that's where I'm walking into.

453
00:23:48,920 --> 00:23:50,439
Speaker 3: You know, it's got to be a shitty feeling.

454
00:23:50,560 --> 00:23:53,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, and so I'm like, I don't have to. I'm like,

455
00:23:53,480 --> 00:23:57,560
Speaker 2: let's just yeah, have cash be cash flow positive, watch

456
00:23:57,600 --> 00:24:01,000
Speaker 2: that P and L and you know, have partnerships, have

457
00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:02,720
Speaker 2: A we have B two C and B to B

458
00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:06,040
Speaker 2: listening to customers using our data to influence what we

459
00:24:06,119 --> 00:24:08,960
Speaker 2: do next. Like, let's do that. And that was the

460
00:24:08,960 --> 00:24:12,040
Speaker 2: best decision that I made. I mean because the freedom

461
00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:16,120
Speaker 2: of not having investors. You know, we've taken on some

462
00:24:16,760 --> 00:24:22,200
Speaker 2: impact loan investment money, so low interest funding right here

463
00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:23,479
Speaker 2: in Atlanta.

464
00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:26,160
Speaker 3: Through like a community banks.

465
00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:31,720
Speaker 2: Or quasi governmental is called Impact Atlanta. And there's probably, yeah,

466
00:24:31,800 --> 00:24:33,800
Speaker 2: you know, an impact Houston or I don't know, I'm

467
00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:36,000
Speaker 2: making other there is an impact in Choice. But these

468
00:24:36,359 --> 00:24:39,760
Speaker 2: orgs are quasi governmental. They have private and public funding

469
00:24:39,840 --> 00:24:42,800
Speaker 2: to help fund innovation in those cities, and so they're

470
00:24:42,840 --> 00:24:45,920
Speaker 2: looking for different products, whether that's you know, retail, whether

471
00:24:45,960 --> 00:24:50,080
Speaker 2: that's residential so mixed use housing and spaces. Like they're

472
00:24:50,119 --> 00:24:53,800
Speaker 2: just investing to ensure the city keeps up and appears

473
00:24:53,920 --> 00:24:57,199
Speaker 2: like one that is innovative and leading. So all cities

474
00:24:57,240 --> 00:24:58,959
Speaker 2: have that. I would encourage people to look into that

475
00:24:59,000 --> 00:25:04,000
Speaker 2: and begin, you know, creating those those relationships. Yeah, that

476
00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:07,240
Speaker 2: is the journey of background of business.

477
00:25:07,440 --> 00:25:12,120
Speaker 1: How are you liking Atlanta as the home for your

478
00:25:12,160 --> 00:25:16,760
Speaker 1: business and like the entrepreneurship community there? How are you

479
00:25:16,800 --> 00:25:19,520
Speaker 1: finding those like connections locally? I know you mentioned a

480
00:25:19,560 --> 00:25:22,280
Speaker 1: little bit the networking, but you know, on the whole,

481
00:25:22,480 --> 00:25:23,199
Speaker 1: what's it been like.

482
00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:26,040
Speaker 2: I will say that I'm still trying to excuse me

483
00:25:26,080 --> 00:25:28,480
Speaker 2: to find my way here in Atlantis, being from here,

484
00:25:29,520 --> 00:25:31,479
Speaker 2: having a market city in here. So one of our

485
00:25:31,480 --> 00:25:34,560
Speaker 2: market communities is in Atlanta. We have several all over

486
00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:37,600
Speaker 2: the US, like we have eight or nine key markets

487
00:25:37,600 --> 00:25:41,320
Speaker 2: where our community members are. It is one of those.

488
00:25:41,359 --> 00:25:45,719
Speaker 2: But I will say that for the very recently have

489
00:25:45,840 --> 00:25:49,399
Speaker 2: we secured both a corporate partner and some funding here

490
00:25:49,400 --> 00:25:51,520
Speaker 2: in Atlanta. All of that in the past has been

491
00:25:51,560 --> 00:25:52,080
Speaker 2: in New York.

492
00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:55,639
Speaker 3: Okay, when did you move back? Was it recent?

493
00:25:56,040 --> 00:25:59,280
Speaker 2: No, I've been The second move back to Atlanta was

494
00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:02,439
Speaker 2: what point eighteen twenty eighteen, So I've been back for

495
00:26:03,600 --> 00:26:07,119
Speaker 2: but finding my way when it comes to community here,

496
00:26:07,160 --> 00:26:10,680
Speaker 2: because you know, it's just different. I go to my

497
00:26:10,680 --> 00:26:13,560
Speaker 2: my networking in New York where I do have professional contacts,

498
00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:17,320
Speaker 2: haven't gone to school there, and just feeling more free

499
00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:20,240
Speaker 2: in certain ways and some leggings, you know, go to

500
00:26:20,320 --> 00:26:23,760
Speaker 2: the co working space and some leggings and a sweatshirt,

501
00:26:23,800 --> 00:26:27,800
Speaker 2: and no one is like trying to you know, see

502
00:26:28,200 --> 00:26:30,240
Speaker 2: and use that to see, like is there a business

503
00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:33,800
Speaker 2: successful the Atlanta It's kind of a different approach. It

504
00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:37,000
Speaker 2: is very you know, people will look at the service

505
00:26:37,119 --> 00:26:40,600
Speaker 2: level to try to determine and see get information about

506
00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:45,400
Speaker 2: your success as a business. It's kind of interesting, still

507
00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:48,159
Speaker 2: finding my way in Atlanta, but grateful for this recent

508
00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:50,560
Speaker 2: support that has made me be like, Okay, let's see

509
00:26:50,640 --> 00:26:55,560
Speaker 2: here even more as far as me staying here and

510
00:26:55,600 --> 00:26:56,960
Speaker 2: continue to build from here.

511
00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:00,280
Speaker 1: Do you feel like Atlanta is a bit more are

512
00:27:01,040 --> 00:27:04,720
Speaker 1: like superficial in terms of like the like I always

513
00:27:04,800 --> 00:27:06,600
Speaker 1: be real because I haven't. I haven't been there as

514
00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:08,720
Speaker 1: a business owner. My brother works in corporate and he

515
00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:10,760
Speaker 1: also is a filmmaker in Atlanta. He lives on the

516
00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:15,320
Speaker 1: East Side, and you know, I think he has found

517
00:27:15,400 --> 00:27:18,160
Speaker 1: such a great community in the in the art film

518
00:27:18,240 --> 00:27:21,640
Speaker 1: sort of like space. But that's just my only sort

519
00:27:21,680 --> 00:27:25,239
Speaker 1: of window. Sometimes I want it to be good for

520
00:27:25,359 --> 00:27:27,320
Speaker 1: us because I might want to go back to Atlanta.

521
00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:30,600
Speaker 2: So I'm just like people. I find my people. I

522
00:27:30,640 --> 00:27:34,840
Speaker 2: think you have friends and great relationships here. Just speaking

523
00:27:34,840 --> 00:27:40,159
Speaker 2: on a business perspective, that could be different, you know,

524
00:27:40,400 --> 00:27:43,720
Speaker 2: with it having the entertainment and music industry down here.

525
00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:45,960
Speaker 2: Of course it's going to be a little bit more superficial,

526
00:27:46,280 --> 00:27:49,199
Speaker 2: right because you have that those components seeding into the

527
00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:53,240
Speaker 2: overall culture down here. But I would say there's a

528
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:56,280
Speaker 2: lot of interest in our tech scene of growing that here.

529
00:27:57,200 --> 00:27:59,800
Speaker 2: You know, our elected officials, I love that they look

530
00:27:59,880 --> 00:28:03,800
Speaker 2: like me, you know, especially our mayor mayor of Atlanta.

531
00:28:05,440 --> 00:28:08,639
Speaker 2: So there's lots of building. I'd say there's opportunity. You

532
00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:10,800
Speaker 2: just have to I'm still finding my way. I have

533
00:28:10,920 --> 00:28:14,280
Speaker 2: my poor people, but again I'm trying to be more.

534
00:28:14,320 --> 00:28:17,440
Speaker 2: That's my goal for coming out and do the networking thing.

535
00:28:17,560 --> 00:28:19,920
Speaker 2: But I do go to the networking things and walk

536
00:28:19,960 --> 00:28:25,040
Speaker 2: away feeling like, okay, you know, okay, like they don't. Yeah,

537
00:28:25,080 --> 00:28:26,199
Speaker 2: that's usually my taguway.

538
00:28:26,240 --> 00:28:29,920
Speaker 1: Okay, what kinds are you? I'm just curious too, because

539
00:28:29,920 --> 00:28:33,200
Speaker 1: I mean I live in Westchester, which is outside of Manhattan,

540
00:28:33,359 --> 00:28:36,840
Speaker 1: and I haven't, you know, to be completely transparent, I

541
00:28:36,880 --> 00:28:39,200
Speaker 1: haven't really built I wouldn't say a community of other

542
00:28:39,440 --> 00:28:40,320
Speaker 1: entrepreneurs here.

543
00:28:40,760 --> 00:28:41,280
Speaker 3: Definitely.

544
00:28:41,440 --> 00:28:44,480
Speaker 1: Friends neighbors have been important to me. But when you

545
00:28:44,520 --> 00:28:46,800
Speaker 1: think about networking and like the types of events you

546
00:28:46,840 --> 00:28:50,520
Speaker 1: go to, what do you find the what's the purpose

547
00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:54,960
Speaker 1: for you? Like, what's the best case scenario outcome for

548
00:28:55,040 --> 00:28:56,080
Speaker 1: you building that community?

549
00:28:57,240 --> 00:29:01,160
Speaker 2: Genuine connection? You know, you do business. Most times you're

550
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:05,120
Speaker 2: doing business, there's some rapport relationship there, right, any kind

551
00:29:05,120 --> 00:29:09,640
Speaker 2: of partnership, there's a familiarity. Repeat. Business is done with

552
00:29:09,720 --> 00:29:13,000
Speaker 2: people that like you. That's just the reality. They like you,

553
00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:15,280
Speaker 2: they like being around you, they like the value you bring.

554
00:29:15,720 --> 00:29:18,000
Speaker 2: So those are the attributes you're looking for and need's

555
00:29:18,080 --> 00:29:22,560
Speaker 2: networking situations and and these things aren't immediate. Ask It's

556
00:29:22,560 --> 00:29:26,480
Speaker 2: okay to grow slow, get to know people. Oh yeah, yeah,

557
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:29,960
Speaker 2: be able to help them, see how you can help

558
00:29:30,000 --> 00:29:33,560
Speaker 2: expand Right, I'm I'm rud of everybody black, right, So

559
00:29:33,720 --> 00:29:37,720
Speaker 2: I've done that in business in all ways that I

560
00:29:37,760 --> 00:29:42,320
Speaker 2: could use my influence to ever do that. But yeah,

561
00:29:42,360 --> 00:29:45,360
Speaker 2: those are usually my goals when I'm going to networking situations.

562
00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:48,120
Speaker 2: You know, I'm going to everything from tech events to

563
00:29:48,720 --> 00:29:52,760
Speaker 2: shareholder meetings. For some of these, uh you know, oh

564
00:29:52,800 --> 00:29:53,360
Speaker 2: why tech?

565
00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:56,320
Speaker 1: Well, is there a tech component to BGB or are

566
00:29:56,360 --> 00:29:57,840
Speaker 1: you hoping to expand in that space?

567
00:29:59,440 --> 00:30:00,600
Speaker 3: Oh okay, thank gotcha.

568
00:30:00,880 --> 00:30:04,240
Speaker 2: Yeah. So, yeah, we have the web up. We also

569
00:30:04,320 --> 00:30:07,160
Speaker 2: have our in persons that will be more consistent after

570
00:30:07,280 --> 00:30:11,880
Speaker 2: our breathwork facilitators graduate this may and choosing some to

571
00:30:12,320 --> 00:30:15,160
Speaker 2: lead our markets where I don't you know, it's not

572
00:30:15,200 --> 00:30:16,200
Speaker 2: sustainable for me to.

573
00:30:16,680 --> 00:30:19,120
Speaker 1: Let's talk about that because I want to know. I

574
00:30:19,120 --> 00:30:21,880
Speaker 1: know we've talked a lot on the background, but how

575
00:30:21,880 --> 00:30:26,320
Speaker 1: are you getting more? Yeah, talk about training breathwork facilitators.

576
00:30:26,800 --> 00:30:29,520
Speaker 1: How does that all work? And then what's your vision

577
00:30:29,720 --> 00:30:33,600
Speaker 1: that there will be BGB sort of like like you said,

578
00:30:33,640 --> 00:30:35,920
Speaker 1: trainers and all your key markets eventually so we can

579
00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:36,840
Speaker 1: go get a session.

580
00:30:37,320 --> 00:30:41,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely, Yeah, So okay, we started with that, that

581
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:44,520
Speaker 2: combo of having both virtual and in person sessions and

582
00:30:44,560 --> 00:30:47,080
Speaker 2: so getting to a place now that our community has

583
00:30:47,160 --> 00:30:50,840
Speaker 2: grown to be able to have a consistent breathwork facilitator

584
00:30:50,920 --> 00:30:55,920
Speaker 2: in that city hosting sessions. So that's a key part

585
00:30:55,960 --> 00:30:58,920
Speaker 2: of our our one million impact plan that we launched

586
00:30:58,960 --> 00:31:04,360
Speaker 2: back in twenty twenty one. But yeah, so training facilitators now,

587
00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:08,320
Speaker 2: I'm excited about that one that launched because of an

588
00:31:08,360 --> 00:31:11,600
Speaker 2: issue I was having with hiring facilitators who said they've

589
00:31:11,680 --> 00:31:14,320
Speaker 2: gone through trauma and formed training, but then getting them

590
00:31:14,400 --> 00:31:16,880
Speaker 2: into an environment like the ours and them not being

591
00:31:16,960 --> 00:31:21,440
Speaker 2: aired feeling overwhelmed, right, thinking not only of just the demographic,

592
00:31:21,480 --> 00:31:24,480
Speaker 2: but the volume. You know that you're going to be

593
00:31:24,520 --> 00:31:27,080
Speaker 2: hosting other people feeling that energy, feeling a lot of

594
00:31:27,080 --> 00:31:33,320
Speaker 2: people's trauma. So training arose from fatigue of hiring and

595
00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:35,840
Speaker 2: training people and them still not feeling ready because of

596
00:31:35,920 --> 00:31:38,640
Speaker 2: training programs they were going through. So that's why I

597
00:31:38,680 --> 00:31:42,080
Speaker 2: wanted to the training program, mostly to be able to

598
00:31:42,120 --> 00:31:46,280
Speaker 2: hire myself, also noticing their need for someone that looks

599
00:31:46,320 --> 00:31:48,600
Speaker 2: like me, with my unique experience. I didn't have a

600
00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:49,920
Speaker 2: blueprint for this work.

601
00:31:50,800 --> 00:31:51,040
Speaker 3: You know.

602
00:31:51,160 --> 00:31:53,480
Speaker 2: There was a time when I had reached back to

603
00:31:53,480 --> 00:31:56,840
Speaker 2: one of my former teachers, like, you know, like, oh

604
00:31:56,880 --> 00:31:58,480
Speaker 2: my gosh, you know, like I don't know what to

605
00:31:58,520 --> 00:32:02,800
Speaker 2: do in these situations I'm learning because they don't provide

606
00:32:02,800 --> 00:32:05,960
Speaker 2: the tools, And in some way it's no fault to them,

607
00:32:06,080 --> 00:32:08,960
Speaker 2: because of who their clientele was. What could they provide me?

608
00:32:09,160 --> 00:32:09,400
Speaker 3: You know?

609
00:32:10,640 --> 00:32:13,240
Speaker 2: But I remember her saying like, Yeah, you've reached a

610
00:32:13,240 --> 00:32:14,960
Speaker 2: point where we're going to have to create the blueprint

611
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:17,760
Speaker 2: for yourself. Right, there's no one in front of you

612
00:32:18,000 --> 00:32:22,200
Speaker 2: doing this at this volume of this demographic fake your learnings,

613
00:32:22,280 --> 00:32:25,600
Speaker 2: you know, and so data has been a huge part

614
00:32:25,640 --> 00:32:27,880
Speaker 2: of that, right. I talk about research a lot. We've

615
00:32:27,920 --> 00:32:30,520
Speaker 2: done a lot on the back end behind the scenes

616
00:32:30,560 --> 00:32:33,560
Speaker 2: with research, but being able to capture the data of

617
00:32:33,600 --> 00:32:36,760
Speaker 2: what this work is doing over time with this demographic

618
00:32:37,720 --> 00:32:41,880
Speaker 2: is important to be able to showcase those results. So

619
00:32:42,360 --> 00:32:44,760
Speaker 2: using that data to influence how we continue to do

620
00:32:44,840 --> 00:32:49,840
Speaker 2: this work and also our training program.

621
00:32:49,960 --> 00:32:52,240
Speaker 1: Hey, ba fam, We're going to take a quick break,

622
00:32:52,400 --> 00:32:55,760
Speaker 1: pay some bills, and we'll be right back. Welcome back,

623
00:32:55,800 --> 00:33:00,720
Speaker 1: be a faan, Let's get back to the show. Well one,

624
00:33:00,840 --> 00:33:03,040
Speaker 1: I want to know how the breath work sessions work.

625
00:33:03,080 --> 00:33:07,320
Speaker 1: I think I had my idea because meditation and breath

626
00:33:07,320 --> 00:33:11,800
Speaker 1: work became really important to me postpartum. I've been a

627
00:33:11,880 --> 00:33:15,600
Speaker 1: high functioning anxiety girly and only because I don't think

628
00:33:15,680 --> 00:33:19,000
Speaker 1: life had gotten stressful, too stressful, But when I hit

629
00:33:19,040 --> 00:33:23,440
Speaker 1: my max, when I really got to a challenging, challenging

630
00:33:23,480 --> 00:33:26,920
Speaker 1: time post number one, and then I had my second

631
00:33:26,920 --> 00:33:30,800
Speaker 1: baby in twenty twenty three, and the last year twenty

632
00:33:30,880 --> 00:33:34,360
Speaker 1: twenty four and twenty twenty three, A just really through

633
00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:38,600
Speaker 1: your girl, really challenged, you know. And when it came

634
00:33:38,680 --> 00:33:44,920
Speaker 1: to trouble sleeping and falling asleep really and having these

635
00:33:44,960 --> 00:33:47,880
Speaker 1: like anxiety attacks that would sort of paralyze, they were

636
00:33:48,240 --> 00:33:51,040
Speaker 1: I call them like quiet anxiety attacks because they weren't.

637
00:33:51,480 --> 00:33:52,320
Speaker 3: I don't think there weren't.

638
00:33:52,360 --> 00:33:54,440
Speaker 1: I think about Randall Pearson from This is Us, you know,

639
00:33:54,480 --> 00:33:56,800
Speaker 1: Sterling K. Brown's character, where he would be crying in

640
00:33:56,840 --> 00:33:59,120
Speaker 1: the shower and it would be a panic attack. But

641
00:33:59,280 --> 00:34:03,040
Speaker 1: for me, they've manifest it's like just body paralysis and

642
00:34:03,160 --> 00:34:06,320
Speaker 1: just all the panic is inside. You can't see it,

643
00:34:07,280 --> 00:34:09,680
Speaker 1: but it's happening, like my brain's on fire, but no

644
00:34:09,719 --> 00:34:13,240
Speaker 1: one else knows it. And I have found I don't

645
00:34:13,239 --> 00:34:15,440
Speaker 1: have I don't have like a routine or a practice,

646
00:34:15,440 --> 00:34:19,880
Speaker 1: but breath work and meditation have become a really important

647
00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:21,759
Speaker 1: part of my routine and I usually will do it

648
00:34:21,800 --> 00:34:24,239
Speaker 1: through an app or just make it up on the

649
00:34:24,239 --> 00:34:28,000
Speaker 1: fly like I did. Then the kids are driving me

650
00:34:28,080 --> 00:34:29,440
Speaker 1: batshit crazy in the morning.

651
00:34:30,080 --> 00:34:31,080
Speaker 3: So if we go to a.

652
00:34:31,040 --> 00:34:34,360
Speaker 1: BGB session, what does that look like and how do

653
00:34:34,400 --> 00:34:36,560
Speaker 1: you see us incorporating it into our day to day?

654
00:34:37,360 --> 00:34:41,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, So if you come to a BGB session, we're incorporating,

655
00:34:42,480 --> 00:34:47,240
Speaker 2: you know, reflection, being able to connect with the mind,

656
00:34:47,320 --> 00:34:50,480
Speaker 2: and then using the brain using the breath to connect

657
00:34:50,480 --> 00:34:53,480
Speaker 2: to the body. So that mind body connection is something

658
00:34:53,520 --> 00:34:55,760
Speaker 2: that a lot of athletes and those in the sports

659
00:34:55,800 --> 00:34:58,680
Speaker 2: industry talk about. It's really effective being able to connect

660
00:34:58,719 --> 00:35:02,280
Speaker 2: your breath with your body and tap into your body

661
00:35:02,320 --> 00:35:05,040
Speaker 2: locating emotions where emotions sit in the body, because our

662
00:35:05,080 --> 00:35:09,760
Speaker 2: emotions have physiological effects and so distressed and so does trauma.

663
00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:12,720
Speaker 2: Trauma doesn't live in the brain, that lives in the body.

664
00:35:12,760 --> 00:35:15,799
Speaker 2: We can't outthink our trauma. We have to allow our

665
00:35:15,800 --> 00:35:20,719
Speaker 2: bodies to help process the emotions and all the embedded emotions.

666
00:35:20,760 --> 00:35:23,680
Speaker 2: So using the breath to bring that up and that

667
00:35:23,800 --> 00:35:27,120
Speaker 2: can result in a variety of responses. We use a

668
00:35:27,160 --> 00:35:29,920
Speaker 2: lot of the tools I mentioned in the book when

669
00:35:29,960 --> 00:35:34,000
Speaker 2: it comes to auditory releases, so screaming, it's really great

670
00:35:36,040 --> 00:35:39,160
Speaker 2: incorporating that with the breath work, and then ensuring that

671
00:35:39,200 --> 00:35:42,520
Speaker 2: we have just a safe container for people to leave

672
00:35:42,680 --> 00:35:45,560
Speaker 2: out of such an experience like that, because it is

673
00:35:45,640 --> 00:35:48,400
Speaker 2: intense and right, you're not only having your experience, but

674
00:35:48,480 --> 00:35:49,920
Speaker 2: experiencing other people's.

675
00:35:49,920 --> 00:35:53,960
Speaker 1: Because you're in groups in person. So this ain't This

676
00:35:54,040 --> 00:35:56,560
Speaker 1: ain't what I've been doing. This ain't listening to Chelsea

677
00:35:56,800 --> 00:36:05,120
Speaker 1: Jackson Roberts on Peloton app at night, although I love Chelright.

678
00:36:05,400 --> 00:36:06,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like a release.

679
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:09,600
Speaker 1: You're almost it's the it's almost like you're focusing a

680
00:36:09,640 --> 00:36:11,440
Speaker 1: little bit on Well, I don't know. I don't want

681
00:36:11,440 --> 00:36:13,560
Speaker 1: to tell you, but it sounds to me like there's

682
00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:15,440
Speaker 1: an exhale, like there's a release.

683
00:36:17,440 --> 00:36:19,359
Speaker 3: That's interesting. I've never done anything like that.

684
00:36:20,040 --> 00:36:24,640
Speaker 1: You said you're in Rochester, outside of my car, Westchester.

685
00:36:24,880 --> 00:36:28,239
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, we have a community New York.

686
00:36:28,680 --> 00:36:29,880
Speaker 3: I'm gonna have to find one.

687
00:36:30,080 --> 00:36:32,520
Speaker 2: Once we once I graduate, my peeps and they'll be

688
00:36:32,560 --> 00:36:35,799
Speaker 2: doing it consistently. So I can say this new era

689
00:36:36,200 --> 00:36:40,440
Speaker 2: which is teaching and being able to help guide and

690
00:36:40,480 --> 00:36:43,400
Speaker 2: not take on all that weight myself, but teach others

691
00:36:43,440 --> 00:36:45,520
Speaker 2: how to make space for it, because it is something

692
00:36:45,560 --> 00:36:49,440
Speaker 2: that people can burn out from very quickly, very quickly.

693
00:36:49,640 --> 00:36:52,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's because you're all these people. You're in

694
00:36:52,040 --> 00:36:54,640
Speaker 1: a room and you are like if they're releasing such

695
00:36:54,680 --> 00:36:58,719
Speaker 1: intense emotions. But it's not like a therapy session, right,

696
00:36:58,760 --> 00:37:02,040
Speaker 1: We're not speaking, there's no back and forth. You're just

697
00:37:02,080 --> 00:37:06,080
Speaker 1: being led through sort of a exercise.

698
00:37:05,480 --> 00:37:09,640
Speaker 2: Speaks right, So that could be traumatic too, people's bodies speaking,

699
00:37:10,200 --> 00:37:14,360
Speaker 2: temporary paralysis, people you know, having a snake right, like

700
00:37:14,719 --> 00:37:17,280
Speaker 2: the body is speaking, and tell always say the breath

701
00:37:17,320 --> 00:37:20,279
Speaker 2: tells on you. Right I can, and this is from

702
00:37:20,480 --> 00:37:24,640
Speaker 2: years of practice with lots of demographics. Right, I can

703
00:37:24,680 --> 00:37:26,880
Speaker 2: look at someone's body and see what they may be

704
00:37:27,000 --> 00:37:30,919
Speaker 2: dealing with emotionally, just where the breath is trapped. Right,

705
00:37:31,040 --> 00:37:33,960
Speaker 2: Some people, even in attempt to take a full inhale

706
00:37:34,000 --> 00:37:38,080
Speaker 2: next sale, can't right just from the just the there's

707
00:37:38,120 --> 00:37:42,839
Speaker 2: such an embedded fear of you know, the emotions coming up,

708
00:37:44,239 --> 00:37:47,520
Speaker 2: and a feeling that most people have this huge fear

709
00:37:47,560 --> 00:37:49,440
Speaker 2: that if they allow themselves to go to the bottom,

710
00:37:49,440 --> 00:37:51,480
Speaker 2: they won't be able to get it back up. Right,

711
00:37:51,520 --> 00:37:54,279
Speaker 2: And there's been lots of confirmation around that. Right, you

712
00:37:54,320 --> 00:37:57,239
Speaker 2: have a break up, don't don't sweat about it too long.

713
00:37:57,360 --> 00:37:59,800
Speaker 2: Right when we're in that state where we need to grieve,

714
00:37:59,840 --> 00:38:01,839
Speaker 2: and a lot of well, don't stay down too long.

715
00:38:01,880 --> 00:38:07,359
Speaker 2: There's this spear around being exposing ourselves to our own

716
00:38:07,400 --> 00:38:10,600
Speaker 2: emotions and our own depth and things that we've repressed

717
00:38:10,600 --> 00:38:14,799
Speaker 2: and avoided for a while. So, yeah, that experience in

718
00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:17,000
Speaker 2: and of itself. And then a lot of people don't

719
00:38:17,080 --> 00:38:19,879
Speaker 2: have words to their trauma, that your experience. They don't

720
00:38:19,920 --> 00:38:22,879
Speaker 2: have words for that right, they don't even know how

721
00:38:22,880 --> 00:38:26,759
Speaker 2: to verbalize because it's been a subconscious thing or thing

722
00:38:26,840 --> 00:38:29,440
Speaker 2: that they may not have mentally taken account of, but

723
00:38:29,480 --> 00:38:31,880
Speaker 2: their body did and held on to it, held on

724
00:38:31,920 --> 00:38:35,120
Speaker 2: to that experience. So in ways, you know, we are

725
00:38:35,200 --> 00:38:39,239
Speaker 2: having dialogue and communal dialogue like one would talk in

726
00:38:39,320 --> 00:38:42,600
Speaker 2: therapy and having that back and forth with each other.

727
00:38:43,040 --> 00:38:45,960
Speaker 2: But then that other component of you know, have you

728
00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:49,279
Speaker 2: ever heard of person well who's recently lost themselves find

729
00:38:49,560 --> 00:38:52,640
Speaker 2: lost someone finally allow themselves to go to the depth

730
00:38:52,640 --> 00:38:56,000
Speaker 2: of that grief. Like that's something that internally we can

731
00:38:56,040 --> 00:38:58,080
Speaker 2: feel the weight of everyone in the room.

732
00:38:58,480 --> 00:39:02,640
Speaker 1: So, yeah, there was this moment when I was in

733
00:39:02,719 --> 00:39:05,840
Speaker 1: my darkest place and you know, the past year and

734
00:39:05,920 --> 00:39:09,200
Speaker 1: maybe I'll get there again. It resonates with me talking

735
00:39:09,280 --> 00:39:12,360
Speaker 1: about the deepest well of our emotions and almost feeling

736
00:39:12,440 --> 00:39:14,880
Speaker 1: like the fact that I was in there, feeling it,

737
00:39:14,960 --> 00:39:18,279
Speaker 1: unable to escape it, finally having to like touch that

738
00:39:18,280 --> 00:39:21,759
Speaker 1: flame that in a way, I guess I thought I

739
00:39:21,880 --> 00:39:25,759
Speaker 1: was broken for having gotten that low and what I've

740
00:39:25,840 --> 00:39:28,279
Speaker 1: learned since then, And what I've been talking about since

741
00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:31,319
Speaker 1: then for myself is just how important it was for

742
00:39:31,440 --> 00:39:35,520
Speaker 1: me to be that low and to see how I

743
00:39:35,520 --> 00:39:38,400
Speaker 1: could get out of it. But how like it was

744
00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:41,480
Speaker 1: okay to sit there for a while, examine those feelings,

745
00:39:42,080 --> 00:39:45,279
Speaker 1: get to the core of them. And it wasn't like

746
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:47,520
Speaker 1: for sure, It wasn't just like, oh I had this

747
00:39:47,560 --> 00:39:51,040
Speaker 1: really cathartic cry and then I was fixed. It was

748
00:39:52,160 --> 00:39:56,200
Speaker 1: those are some really challenging feeling So I'm going to

749
00:39:56,280 --> 00:39:58,840
Speaker 1: need to actually sit with these for days, weeks, months

750
00:39:59,400 --> 00:40:02,319
Speaker 1: and work through them. And then for me, it kind

751
00:40:02,320 --> 00:40:04,799
Speaker 1: of comes down to when do I have time to

752
00:40:04,840 --> 00:40:06,960
Speaker 1: fall apart because I am a mom and I have

753
00:40:07,320 --> 00:40:10,920
Speaker 1: so many people relying on me financially, emotionally. I need

754
00:40:10,960 --> 00:40:13,480
Speaker 1: to be a well for my children. And I had

755
00:40:13,480 --> 00:40:16,480
Speaker 1: done therapy, like I did five years of therapy. I

756
00:40:16,520 --> 00:40:18,520
Speaker 1: was on my little Zoloft. You know, we got my

757
00:40:18,520 --> 00:40:22,120
Speaker 1: little meths. We're all open to that now, but just

758
00:40:22,200 --> 00:40:24,360
Speaker 1: there was so many things that were hitting back to

759
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:27,360
Speaker 1: back to back that I finally sort of reached my

760
00:40:27,440 --> 00:40:30,680
Speaker 1: limit and I had to tap into new tools. And

761
00:40:31,760 --> 00:40:34,520
Speaker 1: I know you've spoken about breath work as being one

762
00:40:34,520 --> 00:40:37,160
Speaker 1: of those tools and your toolkits, and it was so

763
00:40:37,320 --> 00:40:40,799
Speaker 1: liberating for me to realize that I can go to

764
00:40:40,840 --> 00:40:44,120
Speaker 1: those places emotionally because I had the tools I know

765
00:40:44,719 --> 00:40:49,040
Speaker 1: to get out of them. Breathwork is one of those

766
00:40:49,080 --> 00:40:51,840
Speaker 1: tools for me. Another one that I've talked about is

767
00:40:52,080 --> 00:40:56,160
Speaker 1: DBT therapy, so dialectical behavioral therapy, which is very like

768
00:40:56,239 --> 00:40:59,719
Speaker 1: skills based. You know, what are some actual things I

769
00:40:59,760 --> 00:41:05,280
Speaker 1: can do to decrease suffering in this moment, I wonder

770
00:41:05,360 --> 00:41:07,759
Speaker 1: from you, like what are their tools or can you

771
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:09,720
Speaker 1: just talk about the tools that are in your toolkit

772
00:41:09,840 --> 00:41:12,720
Speaker 1: or the tools that you hope that more black women

773
00:41:13,680 --> 00:41:17,400
Speaker 1: are able to That was a very long winded question,

774
00:41:18,160 --> 00:41:19,279
Speaker 1: but yeah, no.

775
00:41:19,960 --> 00:41:22,920
Speaker 2: I would say my experience with EMDR as someone who

776
00:41:23,000 --> 00:41:25,960
Speaker 2: has gone through traditional talk therapy and hit a plateau

777
00:41:26,080 --> 00:41:29,160
Speaker 2: to where this kept dropping me like, oh, you have

778
00:41:29,280 --> 00:41:31,760
Speaker 2: the tools, don't You don't mean And I'm like, actually,

779
00:41:31,800 --> 00:41:35,520
Speaker 2: processing is therapeutic to me out loud right, like I

780
00:41:35,640 --> 00:41:37,799
Speaker 2: know the steps I did to remedy this, but just

781
00:41:38,000 --> 00:41:41,640
Speaker 2: you having you stick across from me and listen to

782
00:41:41,680 --> 00:41:44,359
Speaker 2: me and see me as a person who goes out

783
00:41:44,360 --> 00:41:46,080
Speaker 2: in the world as a black person who doesn't always

784
00:41:46,120 --> 00:41:50,600
Speaker 2: feel seen is therapeutic. Feeling seen is there, so them

785
00:41:50,600 --> 00:41:54,959
Speaker 2: not necessarily getting that, but me doing AMDR therapy, which

786
00:41:55,160 --> 00:41:59,920
Speaker 2: is that subconscious brain wiring. So it's eye movement process

787
00:42:00,040 --> 00:42:04,560
Speaker 2: and you're literally using eye movement. It's insane. And when

788
00:42:04,600 --> 00:42:07,439
Speaker 2: I tell you can process so much in five sets,

789
00:42:07,480 --> 00:42:11,479
Speaker 2: you can process three years of talk therapy in five

790
00:42:11,520 --> 00:42:15,480
Speaker 2: sessions of EMDR with the EMDR therapist, it's amazing. I

791
00:42:15,600 --> 00:42:17,880
Speaker 2: want all black women to tap into this because a

792
00:42:17,920 --> 00:42:21,120
Speaker 2: lot of us again have that subconscious trauma. And what

793
00:42:21,200 --> 00:42:25,080
Speaker 2: it's doing is it's reframing the brain's connection to that trauma.

794
00:42:25,120 --> 00:42:27,600
Speaker 2: So it's like it's like if this was the trauma

795
00:42:27,640 --> 00:42:29,880
Speaker 2: and this is the brain stick to that memory, it's like,

796
00:42:29,920 --> 00:42:33,240
Speaker 2: whoop boop, let's go let's go rewire, you know, let's

797
00:42:33,239 --> 00:42:35,440
Speaker 2: rewire to a different thought when it comes to that.

798
00:42:36,280 --> 00:42:39,440
Speaker 2: And so that trauma isn't isn't attached to this negative

799
00:42:39,520 --> 00:42:42,359
Speaker 2: leaf or a pattern. Let's help the brain do that

800
00:42:42,760 --> 00:42:48,120
Speaker 2: without the talking, with what it naturally does, right, just

801
00:42:48,280 --> 00:42:49,680
Speaker 2: enhancing eye movement.

802
00:42:49,800 --> 00:42:52,080
Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, I've heard of the MDR.

803
00:42:53,280 --> 00:42:56,640
Speaker 2: It's amazing. I highly recommend another. And I'd say to

804
00:42:56,680 --> 00:42:58,080
Speaker 2: you it was funny I was like, I wanted to

805
00:42:58,280 --> 00:43:01,960
Speaker 2: the virgoidomy, wanted to, you know, snapshot, and the therapist

806
00:43:01,960 --> 00:43:04,919
Speaker 2: saying this, she was like, I've never had anyone's brain

807
00:43:05,040 --> 00:43:07,120
Speaker 2: process as fast as you do. And I was like,

808
00:43:07,239 --> 00:43:10,200
Speaker 2: it's a breath work. Like I've done so much subconscious

809
00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:12,040
Speaker 2: book with the breathwork. She was like, I think so too,

810
00:43:12,280 --> 00:43:17,719
Speaker 2: you know to where yeahs, yeah, I mean before that,

811
00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:21,120
Speaker 2: all the years of practice and then meeting this tool

812
00:43:21,239 --> 00:43:24,560
Speaker 2: and seeing its response and right now preparing for in

813
00:43:25,080 --> 00:43:29,080
Speaker 2: preparation for the training, hosting the training, I started getting

814
00:43:29,360 --> 00:43:33,520
Speaker 2: acupuncture and working within you know, the medicine practitioner and

815
00:43:33,560 --> 00:43:36,600
Speaker 2: I have adored that, and same thing. He's like, your

816
00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:40,320
Speaker 2: body is responding so well to this. It's me preparing

817
00:43:40,360 --> 00:43:42,080
Speaker 2: for the fact that I just launched a book, and

818
00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:44,719
Speaker 2: that's heightened stress. It's natural heightened stress. Right, you have

819
00:43:44,840 --> 00:43:47,320
Speaker 2: something that you've never done before. It's natural, It's okay,

820
00:43:47,760 --> 00:43:49,440
Speaker 2: But how do I use a tool to help me

821
00:43:49,600 --> 00:43:52,400
Speaker 2: like rebalance that need some more tricks, you know, in

822
00:43:52,440 --> 00:43:57,520
Speaker 2: the toolbox. So acupuncture has been so helpful, highly highly

823
00:43:57,600 --> 00:44:04,000
Speaker 2: highly recommend. Also just the physiological effects of acupuncture, especially

824
00:44:04,080 --> 00:44:08,560
Speaker 2: for women and balancing hormones, because stress doesn't just impact

825
00:44:08,640 --> 00:44:13,520
Speaker 2: you know, our anxiety, it impacts our hormones, and so

826
00:44:13,800 --> 00:44:17,200
Speaker 2: helping to balance those hormones and ensure that we're not

827
00:44:17,280 --> 00:44:22,239
Speaker 2: being impacted, you know, I having a productive system isn't

828
00:44:22,239 --> 00:44:27,440
Speaker 2: being impacted by our stress levels. It's really important. So yeah,

829
00:44:27,480 --> 00:44:28,759
Speaker 2: that's been a great tool for me.

830
00:44:29,920 --> 00:44:31,640
Speaker 1: Okay, acupuncture, I haven't tried that.

831
00:44:33,239 --> 00:44:36,880
Speaker 2: I'm doing painless though. The needles don't stand. He's just

832
00:44:36,880 --> 00:44:40,000
Speaker 2: getting the pressure points. So there's different types of acupuncture

833
00:44:40,000 --> 00:44:41,520
Speaker 2: you can do. You don't have to do the traditional

834
00:44:41,520 --> 00:44:43,680
Speaker 2: one where you see people with the needles, you know

835
00:44:43,719 --> 00:44:45,839
Speaker 2: what I mean, being tooked and they're just lying.

836
00:44:45,920 --> 00:44:47,160
Speaker 3: There's all different levels of it.

837
00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:49,800
Speaker 1: Okay, I don't mind a little pain if it's gonna

838
00:44:49,800 --> 00:44:51,239
Speaker 1: work just like you could.

839
00:44:52,120 --> 00:44:53,520
Speaker 3: Does it hurt good? I don't know.

840
00:44:54,040 --> 00:44:56,520
Speaker 2: I feels like little pricks. The kid he does, he's

841
00:44:56,600 --> 00:44:59,040
Speaker 2: just okay. Point so there's no need for the needles

842
00:44:59,080 --> 00:45:01,040
Speaker 2: to actually stand there. I mean, this is a different

843
00:45:01,080 --> 00:45:05,680
Speaker 2: type of acupuncture, older, older type. Yeah, and it's okay

844
00:45:05,840 --> 00:45:08,600
Speaker 2: to not feel the pain that the results worked just

845
00:45:08,680 --> 00:45:09,480
Speaker 2: the same. Trust.

846
00:45:13,280 --> 00:45:14,760
Speaker 3: Okay, that's something to think about.

847
00:45:15,280 --> 00:45:20,200
Speaker 2: Daily walking. Daily walk low impact movement low impact movement,

848
00:45:20,239 --> 00:45:22,960
Speaker 2: and there's recently some research that was written. I've got

849
00:45:22,960 --> 00:45:26,680
Speaker 2: to find that article again. But how nature walking helps

850
00:45:26,680 --> 00:45:30,200
Speaker 2: with processing trauma because when we're nature walking, we're looking

851
00:45:30,280 --> 00:45:36,080
Speaker 2: left right, which mimics what an AMDR process. Yes, yes,

852
00:45:36,239 --> 00:45:39,040
Speaker 2: so I was like, my gosh.

853
00:45:38,400 --> 00:45:43,400
Speaker 1: Yeah walking with walking or I don't run as much anymore.

854
00:45:43,440 --> 00:45:45,960
Speaker 1: But when I did run, I was training for a

855
00:45:46,000 --> 00:45:50,160
Speaker 1: triathlon and they wouldn't let you use ear earbuds, you

856
00:45:50,200 --> 00:45:52,960
Speaker 1: couldn't listen to music, and that really taught me how

857
00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:55,759
Speaker 1: to run just kind of based on and just get

858
00:45:55,760 --> 00:45:59,320
Speaker 1: into the rhythm of my body and my breath. And

859
00:45:59,400 --> 00:46:02,120
Speaker 1: so when I want I try to walk if I'm

860
00:46:02,120 --> 00:46:04,279
Speaker 1: doing it for mental health, like sometimes just walking and

861
00:46:04,280 --> 00:46:06,920
Speaker 1: walk the dog, I'm gonna listen to something. But I

862
00:46:06,960 --> 00:46:09,279
Speaker 1: have found like walking without something in my ear to

863
00:46:09,360 --> 00:46:12,359
Speaker 1: listen to, which I think some people, I mean even

864
00:46:12,400 --> 00:46:14,400
Speaker 1: sometimes myself. I'm like, why can't I just do the

865
00:46:14,440 --> 00:46:18,760
Speaker 1: dishes and listen to my thoughts? But is that important

866
00:46:18,800 --> 00:46:21,920
Speaker 1: to you to just have like quiet walking time or

867
00:46:21,920 --> 00:46:24,440
Speaker 1: do you find yourself gravitating toward like listening to something.

868
00:46:24,640 --> 00:46:28,759
Speaker 2: I have lots of time in general, Okay, at least

869
00:46:28,760 --> 00:46:31,719
Speaker 2: for lots of reflective and quite like I feel even

870
00:46:31,760 --> 00:46:33,440
Speaker 2: working throughout the day, I'm not having a bunch of

871
00:46:33,440 --> 00:46:36,760
Speaker 2: stuff playing, you know, I just really continue to my senses.

872
00:46:36,760 --> 00:46:39,200
Speaker 2: What's going on when I'm eating, I'm not watching TV,

873
00:46:39,320 --> 00:46:40,880
Speaker 2: I'm not on my phone. I like to eat. I

874
00:46:40,920 --> 00:46:42,920
Speaker 2: like to enjoy my food, right, Just little things that

875
00:46:42,920 --> 00:46:45,040
Speaker 2: I do throughout the day that help my brain not

876
00:46:45,120 --> 00:46:50,120
Speaker 2: get so attached to multitasking and distractions. And so I

877
00:46:50,160 --> 00:46:52,480
Speaker 2: feel like I make a good enough amount of time

878
00:46:52,640 --> 00:46:55,680
Speaker 2: for quiet time every day. But in my walking, it

879
00:46:55,719 --> 00:46:58,799
Speaker 2: really depends. Sometimes I'm gonna listen to a really good podcasts.

880
00:46:59,360 --> 00:47:01,960
Speaker 2: Sometimes I just want to listen to like the birds

881
00:47:02,040 --> 00:47:05,759
Speaker 2: and leaves rustling, you know what I mean, not in

882
00:47:05,840 --> 00:47:09,040
Speaker 2: the park, And so it really depends. I'm always asking

883
00:47:09,160 --> 00:47:11,759
Speaker 2: myself what I need in the day, and for you know,

884
00:47:11,840 --> 00:47:14,160
Speaker 2: it changes. That's the way we can be flexible with

885
00:47:14,200 --> 00:47:17,799
Speaker 2: our tools is just being kind to ourselves that one

886
00:47:17,880 --> 00:47:19,839
Speaker 2: day's tools may not look like the other.

887
00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:26,440
Speaker 1: Fond yes that part, yeah, and replacing some I know.

888
00:47:26,480 --> 00:47:28,480
Speaker 1: The word that keeps bouncing around in my head is

889
00:47:28,560 --> 00:47:32,200
Speaker 1: maladaptive because I think that there I certainly have to

890
00:47:32,320 --> 00:47:36,600
Speaker 1: maladaptive habits that served me as a kid, and you

891
00:47:36,640 --> 00:47:38,640
Speaker 1: know that I just kept doing as an adult that

892
00:47:39,360 --> 00:47:42,040
Speaker 1: maladaptive is just like, ain't good for you. It actually

893
00:47:42,320 --> 00:47:44,520
Speaker 1: hurts you in the long run. And trying to replace

894
00:47:44,600 --> 00:47:51,000
Speaker 1: those with healthier coping strategies is it's hard. It's hard,

895
00:47:51,080 --> 00:47:54,880
Speaker 1: and sometimes you find yourself going back and into some

896
00:47:55,040 --> 00:47:58,640
Speaker 1: old habits or yeah, just some practices that you're like, damn,

897
00:47:58,719 --> 00:48:01,240
Speaker 1: I thought I thought I had that one under control.

898
00:48:03,320 --> 00:48:06,520
Speaker 2: This is just part of the process that's so proud us.

899
00:48:07,160 --> 00:48:09,160
Speaker 2: There's no such thing as a straight wide and our

900
00:48:09,239 --> 00:48:13,000
Speaker 2: feeling and just being able to Like my friend recently

901
00:48:13,840 --> 00:48:17,080
Speaker 2: mentioned about leaning into love, just leaning into love and

902
00:48:17,160 --> 00:48:20,440
Speaker 2: always when it comes to ourselves like self love, Yeah,

903
00:48:20,920 --> 00:48:23,400
Speaker 2: leading into where the love goes. I think too, we

904
00:48:23,440 --> 00:48:26,520
Speaker 2: can self sabotage being happy and having a joyful moment

905
00:48:26,560 --> 00:48:29,640
Speaker 2: if things have been rough for a while. Talk about

906
00:48:29,680 --> 00:48:31,400
Speaker 2: that we don't even know some of us don't know

907
00:48:31,440 --> 00:48:33,600
Speaker 2: how to enjoy the happy moments when they are here

908
00:48:33,640 --> 00:48:36,120
Speaker 2: because we've just been so used to the down moments,

909
00:48:36,160 --> 00:48:40,800
Speaker 2: and so when that happens, sometimes we subconsciously self sabotage

910
00:48:40,920 --> 00:48:44,680
Speaker 2: by engaging in something that doesn't feel good. Just because

911
00:48:44,680 --> 00:48:49,080
Speaker 2: it's what our bodies used to. So just leaning, even

912
00:48:49,200 --> 00:48:52,319
Speaker 2: you know, as uncomfortable as can feel, sometimes leaning all

913
00:48:52,360 --> 00:48:55,879
Speaker 2: the way into the love and the goodness, practicing that

914
00:48:56,040 --> 00:48:56,840
Speaker 2: it's a practice.

915
00:48:57,040 --> 00:49:00,640
Speaker 1: That's a practice too, Yeah, and that it's also a

916
00:49:00,680 --> 00:49:03,760
Speaker 1: good reminder too that yesterday's tools may not work today.

917
00:49:03,840 --> 00:49:07,200
Speaker 1: And having kids really help me see that, because first

918
00:49:07,239 --> 00:49:09,000
Speaker 1: of all, different I used to have this mantra of

919
00:49:09,040 --> 00:49:12,640
Speaker 1: like different baby every day because yesterday the binkie would work,

920
00:49:12,680 --> 00:49:14,640
Speaker 1: but today it's like I don't want that make It's

921
00:49:14,680 --> 00:49:16,840
Speaker 1: like I really want you to walk around the kitchen

922
00:49:16,880 --> 00:49:20,160
Speaker 1: island a thousand times with me in a very specific

923
00:49:20,200 --> 00:49:25,000
Speaker 1: hold or its music one day and you se desperately

924
00:49:25,040 --> 00:49:27,120
Speaker 1: and I can see my husband really struggles with this.

925
00:49:27,280 --> 00:49:29,279
Speaker 3: He's like, but this isn't working anymore. What am I

926
00:49:29,280 --> 00:49:29,560
Speaker 3: going to do?

927
00:49:29,880 --> 00:49:31,839
Speaker 1: You got to ask that, You got to ask them.

928
00:49:31,880 --> 00:49:34,520
Speaker 1: You got to be patient and let them show you

929
00:49:34,520 --> 00:49:37,000
Speaker 1: what they need in this moment. And I think we're

930
00:49:37,080 --> 00:49:41,600
Speaker 1: very similar as adults, and you know, some days, what

931
00:49:41,600 --> 00:49:43,759
Speaker 1: what I like to have all the tools. At the

932
00:49:43,760 --> 00:49:47,719
Speaker 1: beginning of this ye oh last year, as I was

933
00:49:47,760 --> 00:49:49,320
Speaker 1: going through this like deep journey, I was like, I

934
00:49:49,400 --> 00:49:50,960
Speaker 1: want to know what all the tools are, and I

935
00:49:50,960 --> 00:49:53,160
Speaker 1: want to have I want to have them at my

936
00:49:53,239 --> 00:49:57,600
Speaker 1: fingertips so that I can reach toward them and not

937
00:49:57,760 --> 00:50:00,200
Speaker 1: have so much pressure for that to be the one thing.

938
00:50:01,880 --> 00:50:05,000
Speaker 1: A bath may relax me for an hour, but I

939
00:50:05,040 --> 00:50:06,920
Speaker 1: may need to journal on top of it. I may

940
00:50:06,960 --> 00:50:10,040
Speaker 1: need to book a massage. I may need to do

941
00:50:10,120 --> 00:50:15,960
Speaker 1: a meditation, you know, the next day, the next week, whatever,

942
00:50:16,520 --> 00:50:19,560
Speaker 1: and just kind of being open to like, yeah, the

943
00:50:19,760 --> 00:50:23,160
Speaker 1: the changing of that, and there's not one magical routine

944
00:50:23,880 --> 00:50:30,600
Speaker 1: that will fit everyone. Yeah, being open to surprise, yeah.

945
00:50:31,160 --> 00:50:35,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, and the yummy surprises too, things working out better

946
00:50:35,800 --> 00:50:38,319
Speaker 2: than we expected or fitting better than me into you know.

947
00:50:39,320 --> 00:50:42,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, well would you mind if I can? This is

948
00:50:42,640 --> 00:50:44,840
Speaker 1: like your talent now right every you're like lind Ma

949
00:50:44,880 --> 00:50:47,600
Speaker 1: and will Miranda when everyone's like can you freestyle? And

950
00:50:47,640 --> 00:50:49,840
Speaker 1: it's like Jasmine, will you do a meditation with or

951
00:50:49,920 --> 00:50:52,799
Speaker 1: breath work with me or with ba Fan?

952
00:50:52,920 --> 00:50:54,120
Speaker 3: Do you have time a little bit.

953
00:50:54,040 --> 00:50:55,840
Speaker 2: Of oceanic breath to close this out?

954
00:50:56,960 --> 00:51:00,640
Speaker 1: That sounds wonderful oceanic breath okay.

955
00:51:00,640 --> 00:51:06,239
Speaker 2: And the practice sounds just like its name, So mimicking

956
00:51:06,280 --> 00:51:08,480
Speaker 2: our breasts to sound like the ocean it was can

957
00:51:08,520 --> 00:51:12,000
Speaker 2: close our eyes and just envision that. But you're gonna

958
00:51:12,040 --> 00:51:15,000
Speaker 2: be opening your mouth as wide open as possible.

959
00:51:15,480 --> 00:51:18,080
Speaker 3: And you're gonna mm hm really okay.

960
00:51:17,920 --> 00:51:19,319
Speaker 2: For increased airplot Yeah.

961
00:51:19,400 --> 00:51:21,120
Speaker 3: Oh it's so tight you don't have.

962
00:51:21,040 --> 00:51:22,920
Speaker 2: To force it. We can easeful.

963
00:51:23,719 --> 00:51:24,120
Speaker 3: Oh okay.

964
00:51:28,760 --> 00:51:30,240
Speaker 2: Exhaling out of the mouth.

965
00:51:32,719 --> 00:51:34,480
Speaker 3: Okay, that was just for practice. I want I'm doing

966
00:51:34,480 --> 00:51:34,759
Speaker 3: it now.

967
00:51:37,200 --> 00:51:48,200
Speaker 2: Exhaling out of the mouth, inhaling, exhaling, we're really allowing

968
00:51:48,360 --> 00:51:50,840
Speaker 2: our lungs to fill up as much as possible on

969
00:51:50,920 --> 00:52:01,959
Speaker 2: that inhale, then depleting the lungs on that exhale. Really

970
00:52:02,000 --> 00:52:04,480
Speaker 2: getting our bodies used to what a full inhale on

971
00:52:04,520 --> 00:52:14,120
Speaker 2: exhale feel like from the body. I promise if you

972
00:52:14,200 --> 00:52:17,360
Speaker 2: do like five rounds of this in the morning, you'll

973
00:52:17,400 --> 00:52:21,919
Speaker 2: feel it and it'll really activate that parasympathetic.

974
00:52:21,560 --> 00:52:26,440
Speaker 3: Very tingly up here? Is that normal? Very tingly? I

975
00:52:26,520 --> 00:52:27,200
Speaker 3: love you know.

976
00:52:27,320 --> 00:52:30,120
Speaker 1: I think with breath often it's like breathe in through

977
00:52:30,120 --> 00:52:32,200
Speaker 1: the nose, out through the mouth. I've never done that

978
00:52:32,280 --> 00:52:33,520
Speaker 1: full mouth inhale.

979
00:52:33,640 --> 00:52:36,399
Speaker 2: Yeah. There's so many different types and patterns of breath work,

980
00:52:36,800 --> 00:52:39,520
Speaker 2: so many outed in well.

981
00:52:39,560 --> 00:52:41,960
Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Jasmine for coming on Brown Ambition.

982
00:52:42,000 --> 00:52:44,640
Speaker 1: Thank you for writing this book and for giving me

983
00:52:44,680 --> 00:52:46,480
Speaker 1: a different way to look at a tool that I

984
00:52:46,480 --> 00:52:48,640
Speaker 1: thought I already kind of knew. No, I don't. There's

985
00:52:48,640 --> 00:52:50,879
Speaker 1: so many layers to it. I can't wait to explore more.

986
00:52:51,160 --> 00:52:54,080
Speaker 1: Where can people find you and find BGP and join

987
00:52:54,120 --> 00:52:56,120
Speaker 1: that community our books?

988
00:52:56,239 --> 00:53:00,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you can find at Black Girlsbreeding dot com.

989
00:53:01,440 --> 00:53:04,720
Speaker 2: We have some free resources on our website, our mental

990
00:53:04,719 --> 00:53:08,719
Speaker 2: health toolkit. You can join our paidcommunity app dot Black

991
00:53:08,760 --> 00:53:13,239
Speaker 2: Girls Breathing dot com, Sunday Bomb. We have guided HD

992
00:53:13,960 --> 00:53:17,759
Speaker 2: breathwork meditations. I'm really loving the rest series that we

993
00:53:17,920 --> 00:53:20,719
Speaker 2: dropped to really help us practice rests. A lot of

994
00:53:20,760 --> 00:53:22,760
Speaker 2: us need help and it's okay, it's not un learning.

995
00:53:23,200 --> 00:53:27,319
Speaker 2: So those videos are there to guide us. Audio meditations,

996
00:53:27,320 --> 00:53:30,960
Speaker 2: we have live sessions and communal dialogue, expanded content, all

997
00:53:31,040 --> 00:53:35,359
Speaker 2: the things. And the book is available wherever you buy

998
00:53:35,400 --> 00:53:38,920
Speaker 2: your books and audio books. I am recommending that people

999
00:53:39,120 --> 00:53:42,520
Speaker 2: go to black on bookstores to purchase their copies and

1000
00:53:42,719 --> 00:53:45,799
Speaker 2: also get the second copy from Barnes and Noble. Going

1001
00:53:45,880 --> 00:53:48,479
Speaker 2: stores to have that shelf space is a huge honor.

1002
00:53:48,560 --> 00:53:50,400
Speaker 2: Not a lot of black authors get it. Even if

1003
00:53:50,440 --> 00:53:51,400
Speaker 2: you have a publisher.

1004
00:53:52,000 --> 00:53:52,640
Speaker 3: Amen.

1005
00:53:53,600 --> 00:53:56,600
Speaker 2: So it has shelf space. The book has commented, shelf space.

1006
00:53:56,640 --> 00:53:58,319
Speaker 2: I'm super excited about that.

1007
00:53:58,960 --> 00:54:00,000
Speaker 3: Tell your library to care.

1008
00:54:00,320 --> 00:54:04,200
Speaker 1: Shout out to the Greenberg Library.

1009
00:54:02,400 --> 00:54:04,640
Speaker 2: It's night.

1010
00:54:04,719 --> 00:54:06,799
Speaker 1: It was in their new nonfiction section. I was like,

1011
00:54:06,840 --> 00:54:10,000
Speaker 1: am I interviewing her? I think I am, so I

1012
00:54:10,080 --> 00:54:10,680
Speaker 1: grabbed it.

1013
00:54:12,360 --> 00:54:14,719
Speaker 2: That's the thing about books. It will go farther than

1014
00:54:14,760 --> 00:54:18,239
Speaker 2: you ever expected. To be honest, You're like, oh yeah,

1015
00:54:19,000 --> 00:54:23,560
Speaker 2: but yeah, and and then you can follow black girls

1016
00:54:23,600 --> 00:54:27,240
Speaker 2: breathing my personal accounts that girl and this poor j Marie,

1017
00:54:27,760 --> 00:54:31,040
Speaker 2: and that's that's all things black girl's breathing in and.

1018
00:54:30,880 --> 00:54:34,560
Speaker 3: Me, thank you Jazmine Marine having me.

1019
00:54:35,120 --> 00:54:36,600
Speaker 1: You know you're from the South when you got the

1020
00:54:36,640 --> 00:54:40,560
Speaker 1: Jazzmine Marie. I'm Amanda Lee. So it's the thing. It's

1021
00:54:40,560 --> 00:54:41,440
Speaker 1: a Lea Marie.

1022
00:54:41,640 --> 00:54:44,759
Speaker 2: First, you what, I didn't have a name. I went

1023
00:54:44,800 --> 00:54:47,760
Speaker 2: home without a name. So the doctor told again remember

1024
00:54:48,200 --> 00:54:49,080
Speaker 2: a grady baby.

1025
00:54:49,120 --> 00:54:49,680
Speaker 3: So I don't know.

1026
00:54:49,719 --> 00:54:51,920
Speaker 2: Okay, it was working back there, but they told my

1027
00:54:51,960 --> 00:54:54,720
Speaker 2: mom I was a boy and so I was quintin.

1028
00:54:55,760 --> 00:55:00,640
Speaker 3: So she didn't check the hardware make sure when I

1029
00:55:00,680 --> 00:55:01,120
Speaker 3: came out.

1030
00:55:01,040 --> 00:55:03,840
Speaker 2: That they had off the you know the what is

1031
00:55:03,880 --> 00:55:05,520
Speaker 2: it called the ultra sound all that kind of stuff

1032
00:55:05,640 --> 00:55:07,399
Speaker 2: showed I was a boy. I don't know if it's

1033
00:55:07,440 --> 00:55:09,000
Speaker 2: my hand, I don't know, but they told me, yeah,

1034
00:55:09,000 --> 00:55:13,200
Speaker 2: it must have been, and came out a girl. And

1035
00:55:13,200 --> 00:55:16,200
Speaker 2: and first she named me Aubrey. And my my mom's

1036
00:55:16,239 --> 00:55:19,000
Speaker 2: best friend at the time was like, absolutely not that ugly.

1037
00:55:19,640 --> 00:55:22,719
Speaker 2: So I went home and no offense the Aubrey's out there.

1038
00:55:22,760 --> 00:55:24,399
Speaker 2: They just didn't like it. Remain I was like, she's

1039
00:55:24,440 --> 00:55:25,000
Speaker 2: not an Aubrey.

1040
00:55:25,080 --> 00:55:27,320
Speaker 1: I mean, I think Drake kind of ruined operates for everybody,

1041
00:55:27,400 --> 00:55:30,239
Speaker 1: so you know, probably better off.

1042
00:55:30,760 --> 00:55:33,480
Speaker 2: Wow. And I was like, I was a joke with

1043
00:55:33,560 --> 00:55:35,440
Speaker 2: my mom said, I wonder if that had a traumatic

1044
00:55:35,480 --> 00:55:39,200
Speaker 2: experience on you know, maxists the baby not having a day.

1045
00:55:39,320 --> 00:55:41,719
Speaker 1: Oh God, you can't do that to moms. Then she's

1046
00:55:41,760 --> 00:55:43,520
Speaker 1: going to be like, listen, I did the best I

1047
00:55:43,560 --> 00:55:46,240
Speaker 1: could find somebody else.

1048
00:55:46,120 --> 00:55:49,120
Speaker 3: To blame my momice.

1049
00:55:49,680 --> 00:55:51,200
Speaker 1: At a certain point, I'm like, okay, I'll tell my

1050
00:55:51,239 --> 00:55:52,239
Speaker 1: therapist how you did that.

1051
00:55:54,440 --> 00:55:56,160
Speaker 3: Jasminmory. Okay. So thank you so much.

1052
00:55:56,480 --> 00:55:59,680
Speaker 1: Brand Ambition BA fan go check out her book literally

1053
00:55:59,719 --> 00:56:00,400
Speaker 1: at the library.

1054
00:56:00,480 --> 00:56:01,000
Speaker 3: Check it out.

1055
00:56:01,239 --> 00:56:03,719
Speaker 1: Also, go purchase a copy. This is the kind of book.

1056
00:56:03,719 --> 00:56:07,239
Speaker 1: It makes such a great birthday gift. Mother's Day gift

1057
00:56:07,320 --> 00:56:09,120
Speaker 1: is you know, got Mother's Day coming up? My mom's

1058
00:56:09,160 --> 00:56:12,759
Speaker 1: birthday is coming up. Might give her a copy. Thank

1059
00:56:12,800 --> 00:56:16,359
Speaker 1: you again for sharing your light with us and all

1060
00:56:16,400 --> 00:56:21,919
Speaker 1: the success. Thank you, okayva fam, Thank you so much

1061
00:56:21,920 --> 00:56:24,320
Speaker 1: for listening to this week's show. I want to shout

1062
00:56:24,360 --> 00:56:28,759
Speaker 1: out to our production team, Courtney, our editor, Carla, our

1063
00:56:28,840 --> 00:56:32,680
Speaker 1: fearless leader for idea to launch productions. I want to

1064
00:56:32,719 --> 00:56:37,400
Speaker 1: shout out my assistant Lauda Escalante and Cameron McNair for

1065
00:56:37,480 --> 00:56:40,120
Speaker 1: helping me put the show together. It is not a

1066
00:56:40,320 --> 00:56:43,480
Speaker 1: one person project, as much as I have tried to

1067
00:56:43,560 --> 00:56:46,960
Speaker 1: make it so these past ten years. I need help, y'all,

1068
00:56:47,360 --> 00:56:49,560
Speaker 1: and thank goodness I've been able to put this team

1069
00:56:49,680 --> 00:56:52,480
Speaker 1: around me to support me on this journey and to

1070
00:56:52,600 --> 00:56:54,080
Speaker 1: y'all be a fam. I love you.

1071
00:56:54,160 --> 00:56:55,640
Speaker 3: So so so so much.

1072
00:56:56,280 --> 00:56:58,800
Speaker 1: Please rate, review, subscribe, make sure you're signed up to

1073
00:56:58,840 --> 00:57:02,480
Speaker 1: the newsletter to get all the latest updates on upcoming episodes,

1074
00:57:02,520 --> 00:57:07,680
Speaker 1: our ten year anniversary celebrations to come, and until next time,

1075
00:57:08,040 --> 00:57:09,600
Speaker 1: talk to you soon via bye