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Speaker 1: Life is a series of befoors and afters, and then

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Speaker 1: you become a different person, you know. I remember when

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Speaker 1: my father died when I was in my twenties, and

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Speaker 1: definitely a different person after that, and this changed me

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Speaker 1: so much.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to off the Cup, my personal anti anxiety antidote.

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Speaker 2: I have known today's guest for I don't know how long,

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Speaker 2: Like I truly don't know how long. Maybe she can

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Speaker 2: tell me. But there are times when no one can

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Speaker 2: contextualize a news story or politics the way a comic can,

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Speaker 2: and so we in the news business regularly invite comics

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Speaker 2: on to help put a story in perspective, or make

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Speaker 2: fun of it or make us laugh through the insanity.

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Speaker 2: And that is how I got to know her. And

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Speaker 2: I've always loved her quickness, her passion, her intelligence, her timing,

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Speaker 2: and how hard she works. She is an Emmy Award

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Speaker 2: winning comic with stand up specials for Comedy Central and HBO, appearances,

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Speaker 2: countless television shows including Broad City and Search Party, recurring

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Speaker 2: roles in All American Girl and the First Lady. She's

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Speaker 2: done theater, she's written books. There is nothing she hasn't done.

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Speaker 2: It's Judy Gold welcome to Off the Cup, Judy, thank Youssi.

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Speaker 1: I'm so happy to be here. You know, I'm a

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Speaker 1: huge fan.

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Speaker 2: Well, we'll say i'm huge fan. When did we meet?

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Speaker 2: Do you know? I don't remember.

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Speaker 1: It's gonna be it's at least ten, maybe fifteen.

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Speaker 2: I said a master. Or was it at CNN?

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Speaker 1: You know, I feel like it was at CNN. Okay,

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Speaker 1: it feels I remember talking to you at CNN and

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Speaker 1: you were I don't know. I remember talking to you

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Speaker 1: in a million places, yeah, a.

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Speaker 2: Million places in my memory. We have just always known

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Speaker 2: each other. I know that's not true or possible, and.

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Speaker 1: We have we have mutual friends or many people, you know,

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Speaker 1: like we'rek people, many many.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, I'm so thrilled that you're here. Do you

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Speaker 2: in all the things you do? Do you like going

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Speaker 2: on the news, Like when I would ask you to

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Speaker 2: come on for some story, did you like doing that?

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Speaker 3: You know?

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Speaker 1: I do like doing it. It also depends on the host.

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Speaker 1: So you're great at it because you're a comedy fan

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Speaker 1: and you're you were a performer as a kid. Yes,

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Speaker 1: And you're a friend to the lgbt Q community, always

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Speaker 1: have been friend and supporter you're smart, you're no nonsense,

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Speaker 1: and it's that is ultimost.

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Speaker 2: I like everything you're saying, but it.

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Speaker 1: Really does depend on who the host is and like

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Speaker 1: what their intent is. And I think your intent is

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Speaker 1: always to get, you know, different perspectives on a story

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Speaker 1: so that people can make a conclusion based on different,

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Speaker 1: you know, points of view and totally and so and

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Speaker 1: when it's hey, we're gonna have a comic, we just

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Speaker 1: want you to be funny and I'm going to mostly

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Speaker 1: pay attention to this one and then if you could

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Speaker 1: jab and you know that's not fun because we are

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Speaker 1: social commentators. We do follow the news, yes, and we're

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Speaker 1: also and you know you talk about having comics on

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Speaker 1: panels and stuff. We're the truth tellers. We're not afraid

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Speaker 1: to tell the truth right right and call people out

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Speaker 1: and say you're you're Are we allowed to curse on this? Yes? Bullshitting?

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Speaker 2: Yes, you know, yes, well, And that's why I love

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Speaker 2: I love having comics on too sort of skewer and

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Speaker 2: I don't know, get cut right to the core of

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Speaker 2: a story right in the last business, we have to

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Speaker 2: dance around it a little bit. We have to be

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Speaker 2: you know, we have to be polite. We have to,

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Speaker 2: and you guys, you can, you can go right to

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Speaker 2: the core and sometimes we just need.

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Speaker 1: That, right And I love and I know how much

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Speaker 1: you appreciate that I do. Yeah, and that is so apparent.

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Speaker 2: You're so good at that.

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Speaker 1: Oh, thank you.

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Speaker 2: Well, we don't do politics here mostly, but I just

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Speaker 2: want to ask broadly for you as a comic. Has

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Speaker 2: it gotten harder to be funny about politics since the

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Speaker 2: stakes feel higher? Now?

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Speaker 1: You know? Such a good question. I think it's more

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Speaker 1: difficult when you're enraged. So it's so hard to be

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Speaker 1: funny when you're enraged. Vulnerability is a huge part of

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Speaker 1: being funny, because you can be angry when the audience knows,

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Speaker 1: you know, I connect with her the acoustic sort of vulnerability,

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Speaker 1: and you can't do it without that vulnerability, which is

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Speaker 1: why so many people who think they're funny, and not

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Speaker 1: comics but government officials who think are people running for

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Speaker 1: office or in office or elected to office, act like

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Speaker 1: they're funny. You have no idea what it is to

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Speaker 1: be funny, and there's no funny without the truth. For me, personally,

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Speaker 1: there has been a huge and you know, I don't

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Speaker 1: shy away from anything yes, there has been a huge

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Speaker 1: shift since October seventh. Right, So for me as an

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Speaker 1: out Jewish Zionist with a nuanced opinion based on fact

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Speaker 1: experience being in the area meeting with Jews, I'm sorry

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Speaker 1: Israelis and Palestinians, you know, really knowing, you know been

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Speaker 1: I mean, these people have never been there. You know,

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Speaker 1: so many comics are saying I don't want to do

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Speaker 1: my Jewish material, it's not worth it, and benign Jewish

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Speaker 1: jokes that you know that we're funny. On October sixth,

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Speaker 1: then all of a sudden, because I'm a Jew, they're

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Speaker 1: not funny. It's it's been really, really hard. That's been

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Speaker 1: the hardest part, you know, And I think about how

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Speaker 1: every president we have skewered. I mean it's part of

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Speaker 1: our culture. Yes, every comic, I mean down to I

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Speaker 1: mean Clinton was a gold mine. George W. Bush was

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Speaker 1: a gold mine, Carter was a gold mine. Reagan was

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Speaker 1: a gold mine. You know, everyone laughed because this is

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Speaker 1: our presence, this is what we do in this country.

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Speaker 1: We have First Amendment rights. Satire is I think so

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Speaker 1: important anyway, but you would do it. A benign Trump

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Speaker 1: joke in twenty sixteen about his hair. They would like

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Speaker 1: completely turn on, like okay, I'm not even talking about

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Speaker 1: politics here, I'm.

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Speaker 2: Talking to somebody, right, Yeah, well, I know everything looks

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Speaker 2: different after Trump, I know, coming from this or right.

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Speaker 2: I look back on the Obama years differently now, and

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Speaker 2: what I said about Obama, I didn't do crazy things.

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Speaker 2: I didn't do birtherism in that guard, but I was

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Speaker 2: pretty critical of his agenda. And I remember a long

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Speaker 2: time ago, you had some you had some words for

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Speaker 2: for W. M H. You got you got in a

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Speaker 2: little hot water. Yeah, for w you called him a living,

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Speaker 2: breathing piece of shit.

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Speaker 1: All right, do we have to review this? No?

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Speaker 2: But do you look back at that any Do you

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Speaker 2: look back at those years any differently now? Because Trump

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Speaker 2: has so changed not just politics, but he's changed the country.

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Speaker 2: He's changed what oh good guy?

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Speaker 1: Yes, yes, yeah, because I look back and you know,

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Speaker 1: I was at a Howard Dean benefit. I didn't even

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Speaker 1: support Howard Dean, but you know they asked me to

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Speaker 1: do this benefit, and he was in the lead. And

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Speaker 1: I really didn't like George W. Bush because of my

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Speaker 1: you know, LGB two. I was fighting for the right.

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Speaker 1: I just wanted to be legitimized, you know, as a

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Speaker 1: human being and live with dignity. And it was just

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Speaker 1: like cut the shit. But you know, that was at

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Speaker 1: a function, and that's what the newspaper picked up. And yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's been so much different because first of all, Trump

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Speaker 1: thinks he's a fucking Oh I'm allowed to curse. Trump

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Speaker 1: thinks he's a fucking comedian, and he's a hack you know,

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Speaker 1: and if you his rallies are just hacky, I'm going

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna i gotta laugh at the rally two weeks ago.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna repeat that. I mean, not even funny, try

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Speaker 1: to be and you have to have self awareness to

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Speaker 1: be a funny person. But yes, you know, I think

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Speaker 1: about how they didn't have a comedian at the White

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Speaker 1: House correspondence dinner and how lame that was. But yes,

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Speaker 1: it's really changed. And you know what's really sad, I think,

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Speaker 1: and I'm sure this is in your industry, comics were

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Speaker 1: a unified group. We were always had each other's back. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: no matter what I mean. You know me, I have

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Speaker 1: friends from every end of the political spectrum. Yeah, it's

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Speaker 1: not like that anymore.

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Speaker 2: It's not like that in my business either. You're absolutely right. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: we're so bifurcated now in the press that we're on

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Speaker 2: teams and we're all doing we should all be doing

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Speaker 2: the same thing, right in journalism, holding power for people

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Speaker 2: account right, that's it. But now there's the good guys,

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Speaker 2: the bad guys, this team, that team. It's awful.

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Speaker 1: But how does it feel I really want to know,

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Speaker 1: as a journalist, how does it feel? Well? I watched

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Speaker 1: Trump say, look at them all, back there, those it's

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Speaker 1: such an assault on the free press, on you know,

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Speaker 1: our first first amendment. It's the first one for a reason,

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Speaker 1: doesn't don't you feel threatened? Like I felt threatened when

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Speaker 1: he said he was going to investigate SNL. I was like,

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Speaker 1: it's not learned it, I mean, I'm not.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not that I feel threatened. I have been threatened.

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Speaker 2: First of all, He's tweeted at me, right, Trump has

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Speaker 2: tweeted at me my name, thank you, Masel, thank you,

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Speaker 2: thank you. But I have been threatened. I've been threatened.

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Speaker 2: You know, CNN has been sent pipe bombs. I've been

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Speaker 2: threatened at my home and listen, we I got that

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Speaker 2: before Trump as well, but not in the numbers, not

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Speaker 2: in the severity and the scariness.

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Speaker 1: And the social media of it all.

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Speaker 2: And then there's that and we're very public people, right,

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Speaker 2: we have to be everywhere we're on social media. We

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Speaker 2: have we all have our different platforms, and so yeah,

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Speaker 2: that is a really terrible part of my job. And

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Speaker 2: I hate that it's a part of the job now

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Speaker 2: and that we all just talk about it matter of factly,

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Speaker 2: like well, that just comes with it. That should not

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Speaker 2: come with it.

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Speaker 1: But it didn't come with it before.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it didn't. It didn't.

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Speaker 1: And it's like, you know, I think back of all

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Speaker 1: the celebrities who I loved and then you find out

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Speaker 1: shit about them, like oh really, you know, and and

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Speaker 1: we didn't have that because you could have your personal

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Speaker 1: life and your opinions and your political leanings and you

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Speaker 1: could be a big storm. People could love you and

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Speaker 1: for your art and then you're like, oh, I hate

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Speaker 1: that person now, Like it's ridiculous.

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Speaker 2: Well, we're so defined by politics now, right, and that's

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Speaker 2: not how it should be. The center of our universes

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Speaker 2: should not be politics. It should be our communities, our

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Speaker 2: friends or family, our work.

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Speaker 1: You know. It's funny when my book came out, the yes,

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Speaker 1: I can say that book about free speech. Yes, the

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Speaker 1: first review on Amazon was this woman who said, I'm paraphrasing,

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Speaker 1: but she basically said, do not read this book. She

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Speaker 1: you know, she's just another lefty. I mean, you know,

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Speaker 1: I'm not the most lefty, but whatever, but she's just

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Speaker 1: another blah blah blah, which is exactly the point of

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Speaker 1: the book. I did enjoy how I did learn a lot,

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Speaker 1: and I thought she really handled the bill cosby situation.

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Speaker 1: Like so there was low like I like the book,

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Speaker 1: but she don't read it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah that's perfect right, right, as a review

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Speaker 2: on a book about that is perfect right?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Okay, what kind of kid were you? Let's go back?

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Speaker 2: What kind of cake?

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Speaker 1: God? So, first of all, I mean I think back now,

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Speaker 1: I was really I said everything. I said everything. I

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Speaker 1: was like walk none, and I was like why is

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Speaker 1: everyone to like, why can't we talk about And it

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Speaker 1: was constant. It was always like Judith, go upstairs, Judith?

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Speaker 1: You know, but I just made an unto Judith. Everyone

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Speaker 1: in my family still, yeah, you will always be Judy

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Speaker 1: to me. That's amazing. Yeah, it's so funny. And that

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Speaker 1: if they call me Judy, I get really uncomfortable. But

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Speaker 1: it was always like Judith, stop, you know, shut up.

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Speaker 1: I definitely I had terrible ADHD that was undiagnosed, but

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Speaker 1: I really had good coping mechanisms. But yes, I was funny,

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Speaker 1: very unpopular. I was six feet at thirteen. I got

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Speaker 1: it bullied. It was like, you know, thank god there

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Speaker 1: was no social media because I was one of the

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Speaker 1: most bullied kids. And I think back, thank god I

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Speaker 1: could go home and go, you know, play the piano,

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Speaker 1: or go to my room or you know, call my

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Speaker 1: three friends whatever. I had had a way to escape it,

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Speaker 1: and these kids have no escape, right I would get

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Speaker 1: I got a D in self control in fourth grade and.

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Speaker 2: Would you remember, oh my.

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Speaker 1: God, because I had never gotten a D ever ever,

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Speaker 1: and you know it was all about you know, i'd

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Speaker 1: get a ninety nine. Why didn't you get a hundred?

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Speaker 1: You know, it was that kind of yeah. But I

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Speaker 1: was like I had Spelke's. I was just like and

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Speaker 1: I was always thinking in joke and funny and I

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Speaker 1: would always notice shit about people like that no one noticed,

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Speaker 1: and yeah, I was music has really saved me. I know,

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Speaker 1: you know you were a dancer, right, yeah, yeah, that

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Speaker 1: is the one thing I could really focus on. So

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Speaker 1: I think that learning music and practicing the piano and reading,

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Speaker 1: you know, like that, I think was the thing that

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Speaker 1: got me through everything. But yeah, I what did.

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Speaker 2: You want to be? You didn't want to be a comedian,

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Speaker 2: did you.

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Speaker 1: Well? I wanted to be Barber streisand but that wasn't

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Speaker 1: going to happen.

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Speaker 2: Why not?

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Speaker 1: I mean it was I mean I tried. First of all,

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Speaker 1: I tried out for the basketball team in seventh grade

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Speaker 1: and the coach told me I was too tall for

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Speaker 1: the team and it wouldn't be fair to the other players. Okay, meanwhile,

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Speaker 1: my son is a Division one basketball player, Okay he is, yes,

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Speaker 1: And then you know, I joined the band. I was

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Speaker 1: in the marching band, and you know, very nerdy. I

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Speaker 1: wanted to be in the school play and they were like,

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Speaker 1: you're so tall. It was like ridiculous. I even audition

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Speaker 1: for graduate school at Mason Gross and Bill Asper, who

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Speaker 1: was the head of the graduate school, said, you know,

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Speaker 1: you're very talented. You have impeccable comedic timing, but how

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Speaker 1: do you expect me to cast you too? And I

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Speaker 1: was like, oh my god. And my mother was like,

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Speaker 1: ye'all show him. But I had this agency I had

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Speaker 1: something in me even as a child that was like

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Speaker 1: you're gonna You're gonna get through that. I don't know

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Speaker 1: what it was, but I definitely felt awkward and humiliated

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Speaker 1: on a daily basis. You know when I feel that now,

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Speaker 1: you know, you when you recognize feelings from your childhood

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Speaker 1: is when I go on a step and repeat for

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Speaker 1: something and they're like, you know, sometimes if there's a

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Speaker 1: big star there, they just treat you like you're just

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Speaker 1: human waste. So those kind of things. I hate going

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Speaker 1: to premieres and stuff like that, and I'm always surprised

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Speaker 1: when we're like, Judy, look over here, Judy.

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Speaker 2: You know, I know that feeling too.

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Speaker 1: You know, it's the worst. Yeah, but I was definitely funny.

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Speaker 1: I was, I don't know, yeah, And I would always

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Speaker 1: be like why is everyone depressed? Or like why are

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Speaker 1: we not talking about mister elephant right there?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? And then you go to you go to Rutgers

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Speaker 2: and you do stand up on a dare right? Did

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Speaker 2: you love it immediately?

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Speaker 1: Oh? My god? Okay, First of all, I was a

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Speaker 1: music major. I was gonna I wanted to be. My

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Speaker 1: parents really wanted me, especially my father, to be a

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Speaker 1: music teacher, but I knew I wanted to perform, like

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Speaker 1: you asked me as a kid. It was like I

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Speaker 1: just wanted to be on the stage. Yeah, yeah, And

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Speaker 1: I loved you know, I would watch so many variety shows,

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Speaker 1: like I loved Tony Fields, and I loved Joan Rivers,

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Speaker 1: and I loved Philis Diller and Jean Carroll and Moms

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Speaker 1: Maybee and I would just be like drawn to these

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Speaker 1: women who just said shit that you weren't supposed to say.

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Speaker 1: And yeah, so it was Secret Sanna's and my Secret

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Speaker 1: Sanna sent me a note under the door, and we

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Speaker 1: did it very We were very creative with our Secret Sannah,

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Speaker 1: which now should be what secret seasonal whatever, you know,

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Speaker 1: Secret Winter. Yeah. I felt completely assaulted as a Jew

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Speaker 1: that I was playing secrets. So anyway, so he put

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Speaker 1: this note on under my door that said you have

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Speaker 1: to do five to ten minutes of stand up and

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Speaker 1: use everyone who lives on the floor as fodder for material.

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Speaker 2: And I had a great challenge. I love that.

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Speaker 1: It was like I took it. So I didn't go

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Speaker 1: to class. I was sitting there just writing jokes. There

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Speaker 1: was a funny kid on the floors, like let's let's

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Speaker 1: work this. I mean it was and I remember standing

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Speaker 1: there and you know, everyone was doing shit, but I

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Speaker 1: they said, okay, now Judy's gonna do And I had

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Speaker 1: a microphone and I had my jokes and I did

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Speaker 1: my first joke and I took it so seriously, like

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Speaker 1: I was like nervous and stuff. And I got a

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Speaker 1: laugh and I Am not kidding. It was like my

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Speaker 1: body came, you know, came out and was looking down

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Speaker 1: and was like I never had that feeling about anything,

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Speaker 1: and I was like, this is what I'm meant to do.

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Speaker 1: And that was it. That was it. And you know,

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Speaker 1: even today, when I get on the subway with my notebook,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to be sixty two. Well probably i'll be

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Speaker 1: sixty two when this airs, but you know, I'm sixty

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Speaker 1: two and I get on this. I get on this

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Speaker 1: subway with my notebook going down to the comedy seller.

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Speaker 1: I can't wait. I can't wait to try out a

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Speaker 1: new joke. It's like I still love it that much.

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Speaker 2: Yeah great. I mean for me, the writing is like that.

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Speaker 2: For me, I'm a writer, and I you know, TV

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Speaker 2: sort of came with it, but but all I want

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Speaker 2: to do is write and it's something I have to

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Speaker 2: do to breathe. It's like breathing right, and you feel

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Speaker 2: you and I don't do it.

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Speaker 1: Do you don't you sleep better when you write? Yes? Same? No?

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Speaker 2: I mean it really does impact and impacts my mental

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Speaker 2: health and impacts so much because it is something I

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Speaker 2: have to do. And real writers know that, know that's feeling.

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Speaker 2: So I completely get it. And I completely get the

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Speaker 2: rush of feeling seen and heard and appreciated and talented.

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Speaker 2: Right when you feel like, RW, I'm talented at something

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Speaker 2: and everyone sees.

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Speaker 1: It right, and you know, we get we get immediate gratification.

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Speaker 1: You do yeah or not right, and you write and

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Speaker 1: you probably I know because I write too. You're like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think this is good, you know, like we're it's

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Speaker 1: like a joke. It's like I'm like this is hilarious.

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Speaker 1: And now I got on stage and nothing, and I'm like, really,

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Speaker 1: you know, Yeah, did you study English or writing in school?

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Speaker 2: No? I was writing. My mother was an English teacher,

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Speaker 2: and so I grew up grew up in a very

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Speaker 2: verbal house and where you know, she used all the

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Speaker 2: correct words all the time, and so I was writing

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Speaker 2: books at like six and seven. They weren't good, and

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Speaker 2: I was writing novels, you know, because I just loved it.

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Speaker 2: That was my creative outlet and it was so natural

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Speaker 2: to me. I never took classes. I got to college

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Speaker 2: and I was an art history major, thinking I would

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Speaker 2: I would write in that space somehow, but no, I

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Speaker 2: never took a class. Never.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I take a comedy class. I mean

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Speaker 1: it's in you right. It's so funny because I was

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Speaker 1: talking to someone about, you know, people who are like

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Speaker 1: art history majors or music majors or whatever, and that

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Speaker 1: people are like, eh, you know, like unless you're like

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Speaker 1: finance or whatever. And it's like, do you realize that

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Speaker 1: art is a vehicle to learn every everything everything. You

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Speaker 1: learn about the history of the world through art history,

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Speaker 1: you know, music history, you know what the hell was

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Speaker 1: going on?

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Speaker 2: You know, math history.

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Speaker 1: I mean it's ever so, yeah, we don't appreciate the

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Speaker 1: arts here.

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Speaker 2: No, And I get defensive of that sometimes when someone's like, no,

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Speaker 2: what'd you do with that degree? This learned a lot. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I learned a lot with that degree. Well. I once

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Speaker 2: read that you said a female comic can't be hot looking.

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Speaker 2: Men are not going to listen to you. If you are.

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Speaker 2: Do you think that's changed?

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Speaker 1: Yes, like Raser, right, Nikki is very hot.

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Speaker 2: Rachel even, I don't want to say even take that back.

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Speaker 2: Not even Amy Schumer became famous, famously funny for talking

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Speaker 2: about looks and women and the idea of that, the

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Speaker 2: idea of a woman's look and comedy.

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Speaker 1: And I wonder, yeah.

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Speaker 2: If it's changed at all, because I'm sure that was

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Speaker 2: true at one time.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. So because Jeane Carrol, who really was the first

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Speaker 1: real female stand up in fact, you know, men would

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Speaker 1: steal jokes from her. She was beautiful. But if you

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Speaker 1: look at all the women comedians from the fifties, sixties, seventies,

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Speaker 1: they're eighties. I mean, there was always a disclaimer in

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Speaker 1: the very beginning of their set, Like Jean Carrol, I know,

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Speaker 1: I gained a little wake higher. Oh why didn't she

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Speaker 1: get that?

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Speaker 2: Well?

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Speaker 1: You know, even with Joan, I know I'm a woman

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Speaker 1: and I should be, you know, ironing my husband's handkerchiefs.

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Speaker 1: You know, there was always some self deprecating thing to

402
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Speaker 1: put the audience at ease, to say, I know my

403
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Speaker 1: place now, can you listen to my act?

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Speaker 2: Wow?

405
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Speaker 1: And I don't think that we have that situation anymore.

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Speaker 1: And it is thanks to I mean to all the

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Speaker 1: woman who came before and opened the door and the

408
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Speaker 1: ceiling for people to say, you know, fuck you, I'm hot.

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Speaker 1: I mean, if you go back to the eighties when

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Speaker 1: I started huge shoulder pads, men's jackets, very asexual, very

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Speaker 1: just listen to my work. Just listen to what I'm

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Speaker 1: saying instead of yeah, meanwhile, these guys can look like fuck.

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Speaker 1: I remember I fucking slops with their sweatpant I remember

414
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Speaker 1: I was a Catch rising star and Adam Sandler must

415
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Speaker 1: have been eighteen nineteen years old, and he and I'm

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Speaker 1: sitting standing there with Lewis Randa, who now runs the

417
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Speaker 1: New York Comedy Club. But he was the he was

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Speaker 1: the first. He was a bartender at Catch and then

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Speaker 1: he became the booker. And he's standing there and Adam

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Speaker 1: goes on and he's funny, but he's like, it looks

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Speaker 1: like he just got out of bed, didn't brush his teeth,

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Speaker 1: hasn't done low dream three months, you know, yeah, And

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Speaker 1: he and Lewis goes He's going to be a star,

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Speaker 1: and I'm like.

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Speaker 2: How can't even clean his pants?

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Speaker 1: I know, And if a woman went on like that. Yeah, right,

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00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:18,359
Speaker 1: forget it. There's always been but you know, what's this.

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Speaker 1: This happened over the pandemic. So women when I started,

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Speaker 1: and up until probably the twenty first century, women never

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Speaker 1: worked together. We were never put on the same show.

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Speaker 1: So if they had a woman on the show, it

432
00:25:32,200 --> 00:25:35,640
Speaker 1: was one. And when we went on the road, we

433
00:25:35,720 --> 00:25:40,320
Speaker 1: went and had to share condos with two guys we

434
00:25:40,400 --> 00:25:44,040
Speaker 1: don't know, or three guys. It was. It was really hell. Yeah.

435
00:25:44,080 --> 00:25:49,520
Speaker 1: And there was a club in Soho called Comedy You

436
00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:53,320
Speaker 1: Grand on fifty five Grand Street and every Thursday night

437
00:25:53,920 --> 00:25:58,440
Speaker 1: they had the way they advertised it was all female comedians.

438
00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:00,440
Speaker 1: I was like, you know, we're not a circuit. You

439
00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:04,440
Speaker 1: don't have to double down on the and Thursday night

440
00:26:04,920 --> 00:26:07,560
Speaker 1: it was and we got five bucks. But it was

441
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:11,960
Speaker 1: all women. We didn't have to follow some fucking you know, hey,

442
00:26:12,119 --> 00:26:15,800
Speaker 1: my dick, and our next act is a is a woman.

443
00:26:15,960 --> 00:26:20,000
Speaker 1: You know, they would always introduce us our next act

444
00:26:20,040 --> 00:26:23,920
Speaker 1: is female, or they'd be like, our next act is gigantic,

445
00:26:23,960 --> 00:26:26,119
Speaker 1: and it's like I used to just get on stage

446
00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:28,200
Speaker 1: and give it right back, like that was our MC.

447
00:26:28,359 --> 00:26:33,240
Speaker 1: He's got balls and a cock, and uh, you know

448
00:26:33,320 --> 00:26:35,480
Speaker 1: I gave it right back to them. But so this

449
00:26:35,640 --> 00:26:40,280
Speaker 1: night was all women and we did a reunion over

450
00:26:40,359 --> 00:26:44,000
Speaker 1: the pandemic on Zoom and this is where I, you know,

451
00:26:44,160 --> 00:26:47,639
Speaker 1: met Joy Behar and Susie Esmond and you know I

452
00:26:47,760 --> 00:26:50,040
Speaker 1: just said, LORI kill Martin, want to psykes? You know,

453
00:26:50,160 --> 00:26:52,480
Speaker 1: it was just all these Kathy Ladman, I mean, they

454
00:26:52,520 --> 00:26:56,320
Speaker 1: were just it was amazing. And Joy said on this

455
00:26:56,480 --> 00:27:00,440
Speaker 1: Zoom if it wasn't for those Thursday nights, I would

456
00:27:00,440 --> 00:27:04,080
Speaker 1: have quit doing stand up wow, because it was so

457
00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:08,680
Speaker 1: it was just like okay, And so this me too

458
00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:12,800
Speaker 1: thing came out and part of me was like, oh good,

459
00:27:12,960 --> 00:27:15,760
Speaker 1: and the other part was like, all right. I mean,

460
00:27:16,560 --> 00:27:19,840
Speaker 1: you know, I've had to listen to so much shit

461
00:27:20,040 --> 00:27:22,639
Speaker 1: and they shouldn't behave like that, but they've gotten away

462
00:27:22,640 --> 00:27:25,119
Speaker 1: with it. I call it out all the time.

463
00:27:25,440 --> 00:27:28,560
Speaker 2: But when do you think of what do you think

464
00:27:28,600 --> 00:27:29,920
Speaker 2: of Matt Rife?

465
00:27:32,160 --> 00:27:36,320
Speaker 1: Hell, I mean, he's a good looking guy, right who

466
00:27:36,320 --> 00:27:37,240
Speaker 1: does rape jokes?

467
00:27:37,240 --> 00:27:43,400
Speaker 4: So yeah, and crowd it's not I think he's agreed.

468
00:27:43,480 --> 00:27:48,800
Speaker 4: There's so many the rules change, Essie. Like we used

469
00:27:48,880 --> 00:27:54,160
Speaker 4: to go on the road, we would say we had

470
00:27:54,160 --> 00:27:55,000
Speaker 4: no computers.

471
00:27:55,320 --> 00:27:57,840
Speaker 1: We were completely isolated. We had no phone. You couldn't

472
00:27:57,880 --> 00:27:59,720
Speaker 1: use the phone in the hotel because it would eat

473
00:27:59,760 --> 00:28:04,439
Speaker 1: up your entire salary for the week. We used to

474
00:28:04,520 --> 00:28:07,320
Speaker 1: go on the road to develop our act, just to

475
00:28:07,359 --> 00:28:09,240
Speaker 1: be if you if you were the feature act, you

476
00:28:09,320 --> 00:28:12,480
Speaker 1: got to do thirty thirty five minutes. And that's how

477
00:28:12,560 --> 00:28:15,040
Speaker 1: we and then we came back to the city with

478
00:28:15,160 --> 00:28:17,960
Speaker 1: a new six minutes, new eight minutes to get on

479
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:20,600
Speaker 1: a late night show. And then once you were on

480
00:28:20,760 --> 00:28:25,680
Speaker 1: some even cable show like A and He's even the Improver,

481
00:28:25,720 --> 00:28:28,879
Speaker 1: Caroline's Comedy or VH one stand up Spotlight. That's how

482
00:28:28,920 --> 00:28:32,240
Speaker 1: you got club work from working on your act.

483
00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:33,919
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, and.

484
00:28:34,560 --> 00:28:37,840
Speaker 1: Really developed, and you'd go out with this little seed

485
00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:39,920
Speaker 1: and you'd come back with a huge bit and it

486
00:28:40,000 --> 00:28:44,560
Speaker 1: was the most exciting thing. And people don't do that anymore.

487
00:28:44,880 --> 00:28:48,760
Speaker 1: And so Matt Rife is an example of, Hey, let

488
00:28:48,760 --> 00:28:53,080
Speaker 1: me get a lot of followers on social and then

489
00:28:53,200 --> 00:28:58,600
Speaker 1: I'm gonna pack the clubs. But I really don't know

490
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:01,960
Speaker 1: this craft that well. But I'm really good looking, and

491
00:29:02,000 --> 00:29:06,680
Speaker 1: the girls love even like it's so infuriating, you know,

492
00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:09,920
Speaker 1: these it's all about your followers, and so I feel

493
00:29:09,920 --> 00:29:12,680
Speaker 1: like they go to these clubs and they see these

494
00:29:12,720 --> 00:29:15,600
Speaker 1: people and a lot of times club owners say, you know,

495
00:29:15,600 --> 00:29:18,160
Speaker 1: I had this. This woman had a viral video and

496
00:29:18,160 --> 00:29:20,080
Speaker 1: I had her in and she sold out two shows.

497
00:29:20,080 --> 00:29:22,240
Speaker 1: And then nine months later I booked her and no

498
00:29:22,240 --> 00:29:24,920
Speaker 1: one showed up. It's like, yeah, you have to do

499
00:29:25,040 --> 00:29:28,520
Speaker 1: the work right right. So, and they think I'm gonna

500
00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:31,120
Speaker 1: make a funny video. I know how to do an

501
00:29:31,120 --> 00:29:32,080
Speaker 1: hour in a club.

502
00:29:32,280 --> 00:29:35,640
Speaker 2: No, you don't. No, do you think Nate BARGETSI is

503
00:29:36,280 --> 00:29:38,240
Speaker 2: more of the old school. I'm going to work on

504
00:29:38,280 --> 00:29:40,640
Speaker 2: these jokes for a really long time and try him

505
00:29:40,640 --> 00:29:41,120
Speaker 2: out everywhere.

506
00:29:41,160 --> 00:29:44,760
Speaker 1: I think he's one of the Yeah. I mean, you know,

507
00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:47,920
Speaker 1: I look at him. I'm like white guy boy, you know,

508
00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:52,040
Speaker 1: like I can I like really edgy, edgy comedy.

509
00:29:52,400 --> 00:29:54,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, so he's very clean.

510
00:29:54,840 --> 00:29:59,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just like, okay, I got it. But I'm

511
00:29:59,720 --> 00:30:04,960
Speaker 1: just I love clubs. I love that dark, dingy dangerous.

512
00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:06,160
Speaker 1: I love dangerous.

513
00:30:06,240 --> 00:30:11,239
Speaker 2: That's the sit of that. Is is a television a

514
00:30:11,240 --> 00:30:15,920
Speaker 2: sound studio And you've done so much TV as an actor,

515
00:30:16,800 --> 00:30:19,640
Speaker 2: right is do you see that as something completely separate

516
00:30:19,680 --> 00:30:22,040
Speaker 2: for you? Is that a completely different muscle or is

517
00:30:22,080 --> 00:30:23,360
Speaker 2: that sort of building.

518
00:30:22,960 --> 00:30:26,240
Speaker 1: On one hundred percent I mean, I've taken so many

519
00:30:26,320 --> 00:30:29,840
Speaker 1: I've studied acting so and I did Shakespeare in the

520
00:30:29,880 --> 00:30:33,480
Speaker 1: Park and and you know, I love acting, but it's

521
00:30:33,520 --> 00:30:36,880
Speaker 1: a whole other muscle. And I remember when I did

522
00:30:36,920 --> 00:30:40,280
Speaker 1: when I got cast on All American Girl, right, and

523
00:30:40,400 --> 00:30:44,480
Speaker 1: I remember going, yeah. I remember thinking, oh my god,

524
00:30:44,520 --> 00:30:46,880
Speaker 1: I got a sitcom. I don't have to do stand

525
00:30:46,960 --> 00:30:51,520
Speaker 1: up anymore. And I remember thinking I couldn't wait. I'm

526
00:30:51,560 --> 00:30:56,640
Speaker 1: reading other people's lines. It's so milk toast. I was like,

527
00:30:56,720 --> 00:30:58,600
Speaker 1: I gotta get on stage. I gotta be you know,

528
00:30:58,640 --> 00:31:00,640
Speaker 1: I gotta be free. I couldn't. And they used to

529
00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:02,360
Speaker 1: be like, why are you going? You know, Margaret and

530
00:31:03,440 --> 00:31:06,440
Speaker 1: b D and everyone would be like, you know, we'd

531
00:31:06,440 --> 00:31:07,880
Speaker 1: all be having dinner. I'm like, I gotta go. I

532
00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:10,440
Speaker 1: got a spot at this comedy store. And they'd be like,

533
00:31:10,480 --> 00:31:11,560
Speaker 1: what is wrong with you?

534
00:31:11,640 --> 00:31:13,240
Speaker 2: And I'm like why this should be enough?

535
00:31:13,360 --> 00:31:16,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, they used to call me the leopard. Everyone, even

536
00:31:16,840 --> 00:31:19,080
Speaker 1: Joy and Suit like why do you do so many spots?

537
00:31:19,120 --> 00:31:20,760
Speaker 1: I'm like, I love it. I love it.

538
00:31:21,280 --> 00:31:23,520
Speaker 2: And it was too safe. TV was too safe.

539
00:31:23,560 --> 00:31:27,840
Speaker 1: And it's controlled by other people, you know, Yeah, I don't.

540
00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:29,960
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm sure you've had this where you have

541
00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:32,959
Speaker 1: an executive there while you're doing your show who shows

542
00:31:33,040 --> 00:31:36,840
Speaker 1: up and then they stand in the corner like yep,

543
00:31:37,400 --> 00:31:39,880
Speaker 1: just whispering, and you're like, do you want me to

544
00:31:39,880 --> 00:31:40,760
Speaker 1: pack my things up? Now?

545
00:31:40,800 --> 00:31:44,000
Speaker 2: It's like yeah, yeah, this is That's how it was

546
00:31:44,920 --> 00:31:48,760
Speaker 2: during our like the rehearsal, and they'd be standing there

547
00:31:48,840 --> 00:31:54,360
Speaker 2: and you're just going, I, yeah, I I have.

548
00:31:54,280 --> 00:31:56,160
Speaker 1: A Let me get home and get a suitcase and

549
00:31:56,200 --> 00:31:57,720
Speaker 1: I'll get rid of my dresser, you know.

550
00:31:57,720 --> 00:32:01,200
Speaker 2: Like yeah, and comfortable.

551
00:32:01,120 --> 00:32:06,600
Speaker 1: Right, it's awful, and stand up is and when you're

552
00:32:06,640 --> 00:32:11,640
Speaker 1: good at it and you have control and you feel

553
00:32:11,960 --> 00:32:14,920
Speaker 1: so comfortable, and that takes at least ten years, I'm sorry,

554
00:32:15,280 --> 00:32:18,040
Speaker 1: to really get up there and go I got this.

555
00:32:18,760 --> 00:32:21,760
Speaker 1: Nothing's gonna throw me. And the reason I'm so comfortable

556
00:32:21,840 --> 00:32:26,640
Speaker 1: is I've done the shittiest, crappiest venues in the middle

557
00:32:26,680 --> 00:32:31,320
Speaker 1: of nowhere, and it taught me. Every every set should

558
00:32:31,360 --> 00:32:32,320
Speaker 1: teach you something.

559
00:32:35,080 --> 00:32:38,640
Speaker 2: And we have this in common in our businesses as well.

560
00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:44,400
Speaker 2: Where As a woman, you reach an age and you

561
00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:48,600
Speaker 2: are told not unsubtly right, you might want to move on,

562
00:32:49,040 --> 00:32:54,960
Speaker 2: or you know you're too old for an anchor position, right,

563
00:32:55,080 --> 00:32:57,520
Speaker 2: And I read that Comedy Central once told your manager

564
00:32:57,560 --> 00:32:59,920
Speaker 2: that you had asked out of having a special, which,

565
00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:05,960
Speaker 2: which is like ridiculous. Does not happen to men, right never?

566
00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:11,719
Speaker 2: And while your business is I mean, I guess it's

567
00:33:11,760 --> 00:33:14,240
Speaker 2: partly a visual business, but it's really not. It's your material.

568
00:33:14,360 --> 00:33:16,720
Speaker 2: And my business is partly a visual business, but it's

569
00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:18,920
Speaker 2: also my brain and what's coming out of my mouth.

570
00:33:18,960 --> 00:33:21,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, if you're gonna yeah, so.

571
00:33:21,040 --> 00:33:22,560
Speaker 2: It shouldn't matter, but it does.

572
00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:28,880
Speaker 1: I haven't. And I look at these guys, and you know,

573
00:33:29,120 --> 00:33:32,680
Speaker 1: Lewis Black, who's an old old friend life. He's a

574
00:33:32,960 --> 00:33:37,520
Speaker 1: fucking he's an angel, he's the greatest guy. He's brilliant,

575
00:33:37,840 --> 00:33:40,920
Speaker 1: he's so good, he's so good, and he's just on

576
00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:45,720
Speaker 1: the right side of everything. They'll never say, now you're

577
00:33:45,720 --> 00:33:51,000
Speaker 1: too old, No, no, right, right, you know right. The

578
00:33:51,040 --> 00:33:52,680
Speaker 1: people in mid look at Rickles?

579
00:33:52,960 --> 00:33:54,719
Speaker 2: How old was Rickles? When he was?

580
00:33:55,440 --> 00:34:01,440
Speaker 1: Right? John stew I started with John Stewart, you know,

581
00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:05,880
Speaker 1: and Ray Romano. These were all the guys I started with.

582
00:34:06,280 --> 00:34:07,760
Speaker 2: Did you work with Brad Garrett at all?

583
00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:10,239
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Yes, I love Brad so much.

584
00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:11,479
Speaker 2: We've had him on the pod.

585
00:34:11,560 --> 00:34:15,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's the best and you know, Phil Rosenthal wrote

586
00:34:15,239 --> 00:34:17,479
Speaker 1: a pilot for the two of us to play brother

587
00:34:17,560 --> 00:34:18,040
Speaker 1: and sister.

588
00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:18,799
Speaker 2: Stop it.

589
00:34:18,840 --> 00:34:22,319
Speaker 1: But yeah, but no one Netflix didn't pick it up.

590
00:34:22,360 --> 00:34:25,600
Speaker 1: And yeah, it would have been so good, hilarious. It

591
00:34:25,640 --> 00:34:27,400
Speaker 1: was it was like you read a script and you're like,

592
00:34:27,440 --> 00:34:30,319
Speaker 1: oh my god, I can see that.

593
00:34:30,440 --> 00:34:32,520
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, Okay, let's get.

594
00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:35,719
Speaker 1: That be hilarious. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

595
00:34:36,560 --> 00:34:39,319
Speaker 2: Can I tell you I loved The First Lady so

596
00:34:39,440 --> 00:34:43,440
Speaker 2: much because it's all the things, it's you know, it's politics,

597
00:34:43,840 --> 00:34:45,759
Speaker 2: and it was so well done. And you play Elizabeth

598
00:34:45,760 --> 00:34:48,839
Speaker 2: Fisher read in the First Lady. She was a real

599
00:34:48,840 --> 00:34:51,279
Speaker 2: person who was very close to Eleanor Roosevelt. Yeah, it

600
00:34:51,320 --> 00:34:54,239
Speaker 2: was her personal attorney, and yeah, she was a suffragist,

601
00:34:54,320 --> 00:34:57,319
Speaker 2: She was a lawyer, advisor of Eleanor's. She was she

602
00:34:57,400 --> 00:35:01,040
Speaker 2: was openly gay. How did this cred a Ball role

603
00:35:01,400 --> 00:35:02,000
Speaker 2: come to you?

604
00:35:02,960 --> 00:35:08,399
Speaker 1: I auditioned and I did I audition or did Yeah?

605
00:35:08,480 --> 00:35:12,520
Speaker 1: I think I auditioned and I got it and esther

606
00:35:12,719 --> 00:35:16,560
Speaker 1: lape who was my girlfriend, my partner, my lover in

607
00:35:16,680 --> 00:35:20,480
Speaker 1: the I hate the term lover love, but that's what

608
00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:25,399
Speaker 1: they said. Uh, we were in week week. A lot

609
00:35:25,400 --> 00:35:28,840
Speaker 1: of we ended up in the on the cutting room floor,

610
00:35:28,920 --> 00:35:33,359
Speaker 1: and when we were doing this, there were scenes where

611
00:35:34,160 --> 00:35:38,279
Speaker 1: we're obviously in this women's salon in our apartment with

612
00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:43,480
Speaker 1: Eleanor there, and this is really where she became a

613
00:35:43,600 --> 00:35:46,040
Speaker 1: huge feminist and it was a huge part of her

614
00:35:46,080 --> 00:35:50,600
Speaker 1: life and an advocate for women. And you know, the

615
00:35:50,640 --> 00:35:53,600
Speaker 1: director really wanted us to be you know, we would

616
00:35:53,680 --> 00:35:58,080
Speaker 1: be touching now, don't you know. They they stopped that,

617
00:35:59,080 --> 00:36:01,359
Speaker 1: and they cut along a lot of the scenes that

618
00:36:02,440 --> 00:36:09,400
Speaker 1: really affirmed her homo sexuality or bisexuality or whatever, and

619
00:36:09,440 --> 00:36:14,359
Speaker 1: so that was kind of upsetting, but I loved I

620
00:36:14,400 --> 00:36:16,920
Speaker 1: loved it. It was such a you know, a period

621
00:36:16,960 --> 00:36:21,160
Speaker 1: piece and just and what women women actually, Yeah, and

622
00:36:21,200 --> 00:36:26,160
Speaker 1: it was like so women heavy. And you know, I've

623
00:36:26,320 --> 00:36:30,560
Speaker 1: always loved Eleanor Roosevelt. And my aunt, who's ninety five,

624
00:36:30,719 --> 00:36:33,160
Speaker 1: she went to she used to go to this camp

625
00:36:34,239 --> 00:36:37,759
Speaker 1: over the summer. My grandmother and her would go. I

626
00:36:37,800 --> 00:36:40,160
Speaker 1: don't I think it was I don't know it was

627
00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:43,480
Speaker 1: in Poughkeepsie, maybe, I don't know. And there's a picture

628
00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:46,839
Speaker 1: of her with Eleanor and they would go to these

629
00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:49,920
Speaker 1: learning sessions. But you know, you read about her. I

630
00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:54,920
Speaker 1: played her actually in Clinton the musical, which because Hillary

631
00:36:55,040 --> 00:36:59,600
Speaker 1: was you know, obsessed with her, but she was, I

632
00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:04,880
Speaker 1: mean talk about changing the that job of the first

633
00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:09,640
Speaker 1: lady and being independent and writing, you know, she won't

634
00:37:09,640 --> 00:37:11,480
Speaker 1: every day sort.

635
00:37:11,280 --> 00:37:14,600
Speaker 2: Of born out of his affair and right feeling right,

636
00:37:14,680 --> 00:37:18,319
Speaker 2: like having that catalyst say well, okay, if I have

637
00:37:18,400 --> 00:37:21,520
Speaker 2: to stay in this marriage, I'm going to have we're

638
00:37:21,520 --> 00:37:24,359
Speaker 2: gonna have separate lives and my separate life is going

639
00:37:24,400 --> 00:37:26,560
Speaker 2: to be full and rich.

640
00:37:26,640 --> 00:37:32,200
Speaker 1: And ye yes, yeah, I really, but it's like we

641
00:37:32,360 --> 00:37:36,680
Speaker 1: know that to you know, you look at like when

642
00:37:36,719 --> 00:37:41,120
Speaker 1: I talk to young gay kids, huh that are so entitled.

643
00:37:43,040 --> 00:37:46,440
Speaker 1: You know, I don't want to hear your stories about

644
00:37:46,719 --> 00:37:49,920
Speaker 1: whatever and whatever you know, and I want to say,

645
00:37:49,960 --> 00:37:54,160
Speaker 1: you know you're fighting so the people use the right pronoun,

646
00:37:54,360 --> 00:37:59,120
Speaker 1: but you wouldn't be fighting this if thirty years ago

647
00:38:00,080 --> 00:38:03,840
Speaker 1: my friends were not sick and dying like right, you

648
00:38:04,040 --> 00:38:09,240
Speaker 1: have no idea And so that's what I also think

649
00:38:10,120 --> 00:38:13,239
Speaker 1: is just so upsetting about. I mean, I sound like

650
00:38:13,280 --> 00:38:17,920
Speaker 1: an old lady, but it's true. You know your history.

651
00:38:19,600 --> 00:38:33,560
Speaker 2: After the break, Judy and I swap anxiety stories. You've

652
00:38:33,640 --> 00:38:40,120
Speaker 2: talked openly about mental health, so violeence why I'm doing

653
00:38:40,120 --> 00:38:43,920
Speaker 2: this podcast. It's not a mental health podcast, but what

654
00:38:44,000 --> 00:38:45,719
Speaker 2: I wanted was to create a space where you could

655
00:38:45,760 --> 00:38:47,359
Speaker 2: dip in and out of mental health and talk about

656
00:38:47,400 --> 00:38:49,800
Speaker 2: anxiety or depression or whatever you're going to through naturally

657
00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:53,080
Speaker 2: in conversation. And so I was wondering if you could

658
00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:56,720
Speaker 2: talk a little bit about anxiety, depression, those periods.

659
00:38:57,280 --> 00:39:04,360
Speaker 1: Okay, well it's so interesting because I was just thinking.

660
00:39:05,680 --> 00:39:07,840
Speaker 1: I thought. I just thought the other day, if I

661
00:39:07,920 --> 00:39:12,880
Speaker 1: could get all the time back where I spent sitting

662
00:39:14,040 --> 00:39:21,320
Speaker 1: on a sofa being anxious or depressed or not really

663
00:39:21,360 --> 00:39:25,600
Speaker 1: functioning emotion Like, if I could have that time back, god,

664
00:39:26,719 --> 00:39:29,480
Speaker 1: you know, I would have so I would live for

665
00:39:29,560 --> 00:39:34,120
Speaker 1: so much longer, you know. But so I did have.

666
00:39:35,239 --> 00:39:39,400
Speaker 1: I had ADHD that was undiagnosed, and it was caught.

667
00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:42,160
Speaker 1: My mother was constantly Judith the way, Yeah you're shaking

668
00:39:42,160 --> 00:39:45,400
Speaker 1: a leg, and I calmed down, your hypa, go upstairs,

669
00:39:45,440 --> 00:39:48,440
Speaker 1: your hypa, your hypa. No one knew what it was.

670
00:39:48,600 --> 00:39:48,680
Speaker 2: No.

671
00:39:49,160 --> 00:39:52,960
Speaker 1: We would have reading time in school where we had

672
00:39:53,360 --> 00:39:56,480
Speaker 1: everyone had a piece of carpet and you would sit

673
00:39:56,520 --> 00:39:58,400
Speaker 1: in the corner and read. And I couldn't do it

674
00:39:58,520 --> 00:40:01,600
Speaker 1: like I couldn't do it like there was, and all

675
00:40:01,600 --> 00:40:04,120
Speaker 1: I wanted to do was read and be able to

676
00:40:04,120 --> 00:40:06,440
Speaker 1: sit there. But I just mu was stare at people

677
00:40:06,520 --> 00:40:09,319
Speaker 1: and my mind would wander and I'd read the same

678
00:40:09,360 --> 00:40:11,279
Speaker 1: sentence over and now and like I didn't know. And

679
00:40:11,320 --> 00:40:14,000
Speaker 1: that's why I think the fact that I read music

680
00:40:14,600 --> 00:40:18,359
Speaker 1: helped with my reading comprehension. Yeah, and I did read

681
00:40:18,400 --> 00:40:20,759
Speaker 1: a few books, but not as many. Like that's one

682
00:40:20,800 --> 00:40:23,160
Speaker 1: of my biggest regrets is that I didn't read all

683
00:40:23,200 --> 00:40:25,440
Speaker 1: the books in high school that I I mean, I

684
00:40:25,840 --> 00:40:30,240
Speaker 1: am a voracious reader now, but it took me. Okay,

685
00:40:31,160 --> 00:40:35,239
Speaker 1: so I feel like then I got to college, and

686
00:40:35,320 --> 00:40:40,320
Speaker 1: I was always bloody fingers, you know, really like every

687
00:40:40,920 --> 00:40:45,920
Speaker 1: bit of anxiety. I smoked pot all the time because

688
00:40:46,040 --> 00:40:51,120
Speaker 1: I needed to rest my brain. Yeah, so I definitely

689
00:40:52,040 --> 00:40:54,920
Speaker 1: did that. I never liked really drinking, but I'm kind

690
00:40:54,960 --> 00:40:59,360
Speaker 1: of enjoying now anyway. And so I was always really anxious.

691
00:40:59,400 --> 00:41:02,640
Speaker 1: And then I when I was in my twenties, I

692
00:41:02,719 --> 00:41:06,680
Speaker 1: went to some doctor and I did this test, like

693
00:41:06,719 --> 00:41:12,720
Speaker 1: a written test, and he said, you have ad HD

694
00:41:13,120 --> 00:41:17,359
Speaker 1: and OCD and that that is why you have been

695
00:41:17,400 --> 00:41:24,320
Speaker 1: able to function because you're OCD sometimes over steps your

696
00:41:24,480 --> 00:41:28,239
Speaker 1: add where you're like, if I don't do this, I'm

697
00:41:28,320 --> 00:41:32,719
Speaker 1: gonna be really mad at myself. I mean, I got oc.

698
00:41:33,080 --> 00:41:35,120
Speaker 1: I missed a gig because I was like, I have

699
00:41:35,160 --> 00:41:36,640
Speaker 1: to run five miles to day. I have to run

700
00:41:36,760 --> 00:41:38,600
Speaker 1: and there was a snowstorm coming and I knew if

701
00:41:38,600 --> 00:41:41,120
Speaker 1: I had left on you know anyway, So I had

702
00:41:41,200 --> 00:41:44,560
Speaker 1: lived with all this anxiety. I went on meds in

703
00:41:44,600 --> 00:41:46,760
Speaker 1: my thirties. I was so afraid to go on meds

704
00:41:46,800 --> 00:41:50,680
Speaker 1: because I thought I'm not gonna be funny. And then

705
00:41:51,239 --> 00:41:56,879
Speaker 1: in twenty ten, I woke up. Lisa and I were

706
00:41:56,960 --> 00:41:59,800
Speaker 1: in I had just done a show at the Theater

707
00:42:00,440 --> 00:42:03,320
Speaker 1: and DC and it was January second, I think or

708
00:42:03,400 --> 00:42:05,520
Speaker 1: January first, and we were in a hotel and I

709
00:42:05,600 --> 00:42:10,000
Speaker 1: woke up and I said, something's wrong. And I didn't

710
00:42:10,040 --> 00:42:13,080
Speaker 1: know what it was, but I was in a panic

711
00:42:13,200 --> 00:42:16,839
Speaker 1: and like I couldn't talk. I could not talk, and

712
00:42:16,880 --> 00:42:24,120
Speaker 1: I basically I had this major, massive depression, which you

713
00:42:24,120 --> 00:42:28,520
Speaker 1: would call a nervous breakdown, I guess, and that definitely

714
00:42:29,000 --> 00:42:33,280
Speaker 1: changed me. You know, life is a series of befoors

715
00:42:33,320 --> 00:42:36,960
Speaker 1: and afters, and then you become a different person, you know.

716
00:42:37,000 --> 00:42:38,799
Speaker 1: I remember when my father died when I was in

717
00:42:38,840 --> 00:42:42,239
Speaker 1: my twenties and definitely a different person after that. And

718
00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:48,040
Speaker 1: this changed me so much, and it took years, like

719
00:42:48,080 --> 00:42:51,720
Speaker 1: two and a half years or so for me to feel.

720
00:42:53,800 --> 00:42:54,240
Speaker 2: Normal.

721
00:42:54,920 --> 00:42:58,000
Speaker 1: It's my biggest fear that it'll happen again. But what

722
00:42:58,120 --> 00:43:04,200
Speaker 1: I learned was I had diurnal depression, which was when

723
00:43:04,280 --> 00:43:07,840
Speaker 1: the sun went down, I felt relief. I wasn't normal,

724
00:43:07,960 --> 00:43:10,160
Speaker 1: but I felt relief. I could eat a little bit,

725
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:14,560
Speaker 1: but I couldn't nap. I couldn't take a nap because

726
00:43:14,600 --> 00:43:16,560
Speaker 1: I was afraid to wake up, because every time I

727
00:43:16,600 --> 00:43:22,600
Speaker 1: woke up, I was terrified and panicked. And yeah, and

728
00:43:22,640 --> 00:43:26,160
Speaker 1: I realized I had that my whole life, like it

729
00:43:26,200 --> 00:43:28,640
Speaker 1: to a certain degree. When the alarm would go off

730
00:43:28,640 --> 00:43:33,680
Speaker 1: in the morning, it was like, and I feel that

731
00:43:33,880 --> 00:43:38,640
Speaker 1: I reach out to people I'm you know, I say, hey,

732
00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:42,880
Speaker 1: not feeling I know now through cognitive behavioral therapy and

733
00:43:42,960 --> 00:43:47,000
Speaker 1: regular therapy, but cognitive behavioral therapy really gives you a

734
00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:53,359
Speaker 1: toolbox that is invaluable. But I do. I recognize it,

735
00:43:53,440 --> 00:43:58,480
Speaker 1: and I'll say to Alisa, now, today's not good. I

736
00:43:58,520 --> 00:44:00,680
Speaker 1: got to just get to the night time. You know,

737
00:44:01,000 --> 00:44:05,239
Speaker 1: I recognize it, and I feel so much for other

738
00:44:05,320 --> 00:44:10,080
Speaker 1: people who suffer like I. I just want to say,

739
00:44:10,680 --> 00:44:14,680
Speaker 1: it's it's the darkest of darkness, It's beyond like and

740
00:44:14,719 --> 00:44:17,279
Speaker 1: I you get to this place, I'm sure you've been

741
00:44:17,320 --> 00:44:22,080
Speaker 1: there where you you don't commit suicide, but you know why,

742
00:44:22,480 --> 00:44:27,279
Speaker 1: you know intellectually, Oh, this is why people end their lives.

743
00:44:27,320 --> 00:44:30,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, it feels hopeless. How does this end? When? Where's

744
00:44:31,000 --> 00:44:32,040
Speaker 2: the end of this?

745
00:44:32,760 --> 00:44:33,000
Speaker 1: Right?

746
00:44:33,239 --> 00:44:36,319
Speaker 2: When you can't see an end to it, it's a

747
00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:39,200
Speaker 2: very lonely place. And I have a very similar story.

748
00:44:39,239 --> 00:44:44,880
Speaker 2: I woke up one day and I was different. Unpacking

749
00:44:44,960 --> 00:44:47,839
Speaker 2: it over time, I think we determined I had oh

750
00:44:47,920 --> 00:44:50,879
Speaker 2: deed on anxiety that day, I ohdeed my body said,

751
00:44:50,920 --> 00:44:57,000
Speaker 2: we are not doing this anymore. The non stop catastrophizing,

752
00:44:57,520 --> 00:45:01,640
Speaker 2: from non stop racing for bubble around every corner, the

753
00:45:01,760 --> 00:45:04,759
Speaker 2: rituals I would have to do to get through my day,

754
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:06,839
Speaker 2: these are all things I thought that were I thought

755
00:45:06,840 --> 00:45:11,560
Speaker 2: were keeping me safe actually, because it's a completely irrational anxiety,

756
00:45:11,640 --> 00:45:15,319
Speaker 2: right right, But it was exhausting and my body had

757
00:45:15,360 --> 00:45:18,839
Speaker 2: had enough enough. And that's how it told me through

758
00:45:18,880 --> 00:45:22,200
Speaker 2: a total nervous breakdown where like you, I couldn't talk,

759
00:45:22,320 --> 00:45:26,200
Speaker 2: I couldn't get out of bed, saying I couldn't read,

760
00:45:26,840 --> 00:45:29,120
Speaker 2: I couldn't walk, I couldn't watch TV. Everything was too

761
00:45:29,200 --> 00:45:31,719
Speaker 2: much stimulus. And in fact, I don't know if this

762
00:45:31,760 --> 00:45:36,000
Speaker 2: happened to you. Classical music, which I had grown up

763
00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:39,800
Speaker 2: with my entire life because of ballet, was my only

764
00:45:40,719 --> 00:45:45,879
Speaker 2: remedy in those times to calm me down and get

765
00:45:45,880 --> 00:45:49,000
Speaker 2: me out of my head. Everything else was too much stimulus,

766
00:45:49,040 --> 00:45:51,239
Speaker 2: which meant I couldn't watch the news like oh I

767
00:45:51,400 --> 00:45:55,640
Speaker 2: I did all the time normally, Suddenly I couldn't. And

768
00:45:55,680 --> 00:45:58,440
Speaker 2: so there's definitely a before and after for me, and

769
00:45:58,680 --> 00:46:02,960
Speaker 2: like you, therapy and medication and unpacking and the work

770
00:46:03,760 --> 00:46:04,680
Speaker 2: has really helped.

771
00:46:05,400 --> 00:46:10,120
Speaker 1: Yeah. I also think that artists like us, because we

772
00:46:10,200 --> 00:46:15,480
Speaker 1: feel so deeply, our depression is way more intense. I

773
00:46:15,560 --> 00:46:20,000
Speaker 1: do believe that because you know, you're taught to remember,

774
00:46:20,120 --> 00:46:23,799
Speaker 1: and you can go back in your You know, if

775
00:46:23,840 --> 00:46:26,480
Speaker 1: I sat here with you, we could both go back

776
00:46:26,520 --> 00:46:29,200
Speaker 1: to that space. Just thinking about it.

777
00:46:29,440 --> 00:46:29,640
Speaker 2: Yep.

778
00:46:30,040 --> 00:46:33,040
Speaker 1: I remember sitting in the chair in the living room

779
00:46:33,680 --> 00:46:37,239
Speaker 1: and I remember someone said, can you go to the

780
00:46:37,360 --> 00:46:39,319
Speaker 1: corner and get a cart and of milk? And I

781
00:46:39,360 --> 00:46:40,280
Speaker 1: was like, no, I can't.

782
00:46:40,680 --> 00:46:43,720
Speaker 2: I do remember same thing. In fact, my husband dragged

783
00:46:43,760 --> 00:46:46,080
Speaker 2: me out of the house because I'd been in bed

784
00:46:46,120 --> 00:46:49,080
Speaker 2: for a good five days, and he said, we're just

785
00:46:49,080 --> 00:46:51,480
Speaker 2: going to go to the store. And we went to

786
00:46:51,480 --> 00:46:55,040
Speaker 2: the grocery store. And when I tell you, Judy, I

787
00:46:55,080 --> 00:46:57,960
Speaker 2: didn't know to turn left or right. That was too

788
00:46:58,040 --> 00:47:01,239
Speaker 2: big of a decision for me right let alone, What

789
00:47:01,280 --> 00:47:04,359
Speaker 2: do I need? What am I here for? It was

790
00:47:04,400 --> 00:47:06,960
Speaker 2: so out of body. The good news is for me,

791
00:47:07,239 --> 00:47:10,000
Speaker 2: I knew I needed help right away. There was no like, well,

792
00:47:10,040 --> 00:47:12,440
Speaker 2: I can work myself out of this. I knew I

793
00:47:12,440 --> 00:47:15,520
Speaker 2: could not, So I didn't wait to get help when

794
00:47:15,560 --> 00:47:17,719
Speaker 2: this happened. I think I was forty one or forty

795
00:47:17,719 --> 00:47:20,399
Speaker 2: two when it happened, and I got help right away

796
00:47:20,440 --> 00:47:22,920
Speaker 2: because it was so severe. I was paralyzed. I was

797
00:47:23,160 --> 00:47:24,600
Speaker 2: completely paralyzed.

798
00:47:25,480 --> 00:47:30,680
Speaker 1: Alisas a therapist and she kept me out of the hospital.

799
00:47:30,680 --> 00:47:33,239
Speaker 1: I mean, she was amazing. We'd only been together for

800
00:47:33,280 --> 00:47:37,000
Speaker 1: two and a half years and she she was incredible.

801
00:47:37,760 --> 00:47:41,040
Speaker 1: But I remember, I don't know if you had this.

802
00:47:41,360 --> 00:47:45,359
Speaker 1: I remember when I finally could leave the apartment and

803
00:47:45,480 --> 00:47:49,080
Speaker 1: or I was forced to go, like Judy, were there,

804
00:47:49,160 --> 00:47:52,440
Speaker 1: it's so and so's birthday, you know, like a niece

805
00:47:52,520 --> 00:47:53,719
Speaker 1: or nephew, and we're gonna go.

806
00:47:53,960 --> 00:47:54,120
Speaker 2: Yeah.

807
00:47:54,160 --> 00:47:56,960
Speaker 1: I remember sitting there and I used to always stare

808
00:47:57,000 --> 00:47:59,560
Speaker 1: at people and go, what is it like? What is

809
00:47:59,600 --> 00:48:03,840
Speaker 1: it like to not think about yes, this or that?

810
00:48:03,960 --> 00:48:09,200
Speaker 1: Like I'd be like, so you, I was fascinated.

811
00:48:08,560 --> 00:48:10,759
Speaker 2: Like me too, and I was jealous. And I would

812
00:48:10,760 --> 00:48:13,399
Speaker 2: look at my colleagues. So the news is a big

813
00:48:13,440 --> 00:48:16,240
Speaker 2: trigger for me because I'm always reporting on bad stuff.

814
00:48:16,239 --> 00:48:18,080
Speaker 2: It gives me the sense that bad stuff is around

815
00:48:18,120 --> 00:48:20,319
Speaker 2: every corner. But obviously it's what I do for a living.

816
00:48:20,360 --> 00:48:22,560
Speaker 2: But I would always look at my colleagues, who I

817
00:48:22,600 --> 00:48:25,520
Speaker 2: would think, how come they're not taking this home with them?

818
00:48:25,600 --> 00:48:28,920
Speaker 2: How come it's so hard for me? And I didn't

819
00:48:28,960 --> 00:48:30,719
Speaker 2: know that they were taking it home with them. I

820
00:48:30,719 --> 00:48:33,680
Speaker 2: didn't know, like, who's to say they're not on medication

821
00:48:33,840 --> 00:48:36,560
Speaker 2: and the therapy just like me. But oh I was

822
00:48:36,760 --> 00:48:40,640
Speaker 2: envious because it was exhausting, being exhausting being me?

823
00:48:42,080 --> 00:48:44,520
Speaker 1: Did you I felt like I had to tell people

824
00:48:45,080 --> 00:48:47,879
Speaker 1: like I told everyone. I was like, I'm going through this, yep.

825
00:48:47,960 --> 00:48:50,920
Speaker 1: But you know, I look at my blood work during

826
00:48:50,960 --> 00:48:56,839
Speaker 1: that time it is whack job in what beyond? Yes,

827
00:48:57,360 --> 00:49:02,040
Speaker 1: I remember I was looking through my medical records it

828
00:49:02,080 --> 00:49:05,560
Speaker 1: was like deficient in this deficient in that Oh wow,

829
00:49:07,040 --> 00:49:14,000
Speaker 1: everything was completely different in my body from this chemical imbalance.

830
00:49:14,239 --> 00:49:17,839
Speaker 2: Yeah right, listen, this is a real thing, and I

831
00:49:17,880 --> 00:49:19,680
Speaker 2: this is why I like to talk about anxiety, and

832
00:49:19,760 --> 00:49:22,480
Speaker 2: you'll have to book about it in very real ways

833
00:49:22,520 --> 00:49:27,360
Speaker 2: because some people say, well, who isn't anxious? Everyone's worried. Okay,

834
00:49:27,400 --> 00:49:28,319
Speaker 2: that's not what it is.

835
00:49:28,680 --> 00:49:28,799
Speaker 1: Now.

836
00:49:29,200 --> 00:49:30,520
Speaker 2: This is not just I'm worried.

837
00:49:30,600 --> 00:49:33,680
Speaker 1: Now when people go, oh, yeah, I've been depressed, you know, no,

838
00:49:33,960 --> 00:49:36,400
Speaker 1: you don't understand no.

839
00:49:36,600 --> 00:49:39,920
Speaker 2: And you've got to be almost graphic about how much

840
00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:43,719
Speaker 2: of a disorder this is then, and then why it's

841
00:49:43,760 --> 00:49:46,120
Speaker 2: so important to get to get help, because this is

842
00:49:46,160 --> 00:49:49,200
Speaker 2: not something you can just keep living with. It will

843
00:49:49,239 --> 00:49:51,480
Speaker 2: break you, right, and it can break you in a

844
00:49:51,520 --> 00:49:53,759
Speaker 2: number of ways. It can break you with a breakdown

845
00:49:53,800 --> 00:49:55,800
Speaker 2: and hopefully you get help, or it can be much worse.

846
00:49:56,440 --> 00:49:59,440
Speaker 1: Did you I remember I'd go to therapy sashis. I

847
00:49:59,600 --> 00:50:02,680
Speaker 1: just sat there. I couldn't even talk, but I had

848
00:50:02,719 --> 00:50:04,480
Speaker 1: to be somewhere other than my.

849
00:50:04,480 --> 00:50:06,640
Speaker 2: Bed in your head, right, right, and.

850
00:50:08,360 --> 00:50:12,239
Speaker 1: Right? I remember. I mean I use those tools all

851
00:50:12,280 --> 00:50:14,759
Speaker 1: the time, Like you get a feeling and then you

852
00:50:14,800 --> 00:50:17,839
Speaker 1: go hmm, no, sorry, you're not doing that to me today.

853
00:50:17,920 --> 00:50:20,600
Speaker 2: I'm closing that door instead of opening that door and

854
00:50:20,680 --> 00:50:23,440
Speaker 2: running through it. I'm closing that door that's a good one.

855
00:50:23,320 --> 00:50:26,640
Speaker 1: For me, and also identifying that this is not reality,

856
00:50:26,719 --> 00:50:27,400
Speaker 1: this is fear.

857
00:50:27,719 --> 00:50:31,560
Speaker 2: Exactly, yeah, exactly. I heard something great. And I don't

858
00:50:31,560 --> 00:50:33,520
Speaker 2: give advice because I'm not a doctor, but I do

859
00:50:33,600 --> 00:50:37,120
Speaker 2: share what has worked for me and what hasn't. And

860
00:50:37,600 --> 00:50:39,440
Speaker 2: I heard this once. It made so much sense. It

861
00:50:39,520 --> 00:50:43,480
Speaker 2: said the opposite of being anxious is not being calm,

862
00:50:43,800 --> 00:50:45,919
Speaker 2: And in fact, telling someone who's anxious to calm down

863
00:50:46,040 --> 00:50:48,440
Speaker 2: is awful because all it makes me do is worry, Like,

864
00:50:48,480 --> 00:50:52,239
Speaker 2: why can't I calm down? The opposite of anxious is

865
00:50:52,280 --> 00:50:55,960
Speaker 2: being present, and what my anxiety does is take me

866
00:50:56,000 --> 00:50:58,759
Speaker 2: out of the present. I'm safe right here, but in

867
00:50:58,800 --> 00:51:02,040
Speaker 2: my head, in my anxiety, I am somewhere where I'm

868
00:51:02,120 --> 00:51:05,920
Speaker 2: literally in a terrorist attack or my son is in danger.

869
00:51:06,480 --> 00:51:10,719
Speaker 2: I'm actually right here, safe, but my anxiety takes me

870
00:51:10,719 --> 00:51:13,400
Speaker 2: out of the present. So when I know that's happening,

871
00:51:13,480 --> 00:51:16,560
Speaker 2: now I can recognize it. I am not in my present.

872
00:51:16,760 --> 00:51:19,719
Speaker 2: Let's get back to my present. That was such a

873
00:51:19,760 --> 00:51:23,160
Speaker 2: helpful trick and listen. Not everything works, Like meditation did

874
00:51:23,160 --> 00:51:25,080
Speaker 2: not work for me, breathing did not work for me.

875
00:51:25,960 --> 00:51:28,839
Speaker 2: I had to go through years of figuring out the

876
00:51:28,840 --> 00:51:33,040
Speaker 2: things that would actually help manage my anxiety. And you

877
00:51:33,080 --> 00:51:35,960
Speaker 2: can only do that by doing the work and going

878
00:51:35,960 --> 00:51:38,840
Speaker 2: to therapy. And I fucking hate Judy. I fucking hate

879
00:51:39,640 --> 00:51:42,040
Speaker 2: these TikTok influencers.

880
00:51:42,120 --> 00:51:43,360
Speaker 1: Oh please get on.

881
00:51:43,800 --> 00:51:46,880
Speaker 2: I can ent your anxiety in five easy steps. No,

882
00:51:47,000 --> 00:51:50,240
Speaker 2: you can't. You don't know anything about my anxiety because

883
00:51:50,239 --> 00:51:52,880
Speaker 2: you have not you're not a doctor and we haven't talked.

884
00:51:53,280 --> 00:51:59,320
Speaker 2: So I really think that that bunk influencer psycho babble

885
00:51:59,360 --> 00:52:03,040
Speaker 2: bullshit is really dangerous and I hate people that do

886
00:52:03,120 --> 00:52:06,359
Speaker 2: that because you cannot get You cannot fix this on

887
00:52:06,440 --> 00:52:08,800
Speaker 2: TikTok right exactly.

888
00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:12,880
Speaker 1: And you have to be diagnosed. That's why there are

889
00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:18,919
Speaker 1: mental health professionals. Yes, you can't diagnose yourself. It's it's

890
00:52:19,080 --> 00:52:19,839
Speaker 1: not I'm a.

891
00:52:20,000 --> 00:52:23,000
Speaker 2: Very self aware person. I thought I knew myself really well.

892
00:52:23,440 --> 00:52:26,560
Speaker 2: I thought I was doing great. I was not. I

893
00:52:26,600 --> 00:52:26,799
Speaker 2: was not.

894
00:52:27,560 --> 00:52:29,600
Speaker 1: I know, you really do get to a point where

895
00:52:29,640 --> 00:52:30,600
Speaker 1: all bursts.

896
00:52:31,000 --> 00:52:34,239
Speaker 2: I love. I just love trading these stories. This, This

897
00:52:34,360 --> 00:52:36,319
Speaker 2: is my favorite part of this podcast. That you and

898
00:52:36,360 --> 00:52:38,000
Speaker 2: I have just traded. Did this happen to you? Did

899
00:52:38,000 --> 00:52:40,000
Speaker 2: this haven to you? Because that's how people talk about

900
00:52:40,000 --> 00:52:43,719
Speaker 2: real life and there's nothing to be ashamed of, and

901
00:52:44,000 --> 00:52:44,880
Speaker 2: we are not alone.

902
00:52:45,320 --> 00:52:48,359
Speaker 1: You know. It's so funny because I did. I did

903
00:52:48,480 --> 00:52:54,040
Speaker 1: a benefit for some mental health organization in New York

904
00:52:54,160 --> 00:52:57,440
Speaker 1: and I got on stage and I was like, I

905
00:52:57,600 --> 00:53:02,640
Speaker 1: have a clinical depression and ADHD and anxiety and and

906
00:53:02,680 --> 00:53:05,160
Speaker 1: they were like, yeah, it was just the funniest thing.

907
00:53:05,280 --> 00:53:08,000
Speaker 1: They were all just started clapping. I'm like, oh my god,

908
00:53:08,200 --> 00:53:08,560
Speaker 1: thank you.

909
00:53:08,640 --> 00:53:11,279
Speaker 2: But that's how there's this great clip. It's kind of

910
00:53:11,280 --> 00:53:14,160
Speaker 2: funny and silly. But Shawn Mendes is this is a singer,

911
00:53:14,280 --> 00:53:16,960
Speaker 2: popular singer, and he came out about his anxiety and

912
00:53:16,960 --> 00:53:19,680
Speaker 2: then he's getting interviewed and this girl in like a

913
00:53:19,719 --> 00:53:21,920
Speaker 2: podcast is like, I just want to talk to you

914
00:53:21,920 --> 00:53:25,080
Speaker 2: about mental health because I have suffered from anxiety, and

915
00:53:25,120 --> 00:53:33,400
Speaker 2: he goes, amazing this, we love this, we love this.

916
00:53:33,600 --> 00:53:35,520
Speaker 2: I don't love that you're anxious there or no.

917
00:53:35,760 --> 00:53:40,120
Speaker 1: But it's like you because you can't understand until you've

918
00:53:40,160 --> 00:53:40,960
Speaker 1: lived through it.

919
00:53:41,080 --> 00:53:43,600
Speaker 2: Yes, you know, like you don't get it.

920
00:53:43,960 --> 00:53:46,200
Speaker 1: You don't get it. And that's why you reach out

921
00:53:46,239 --> 00:53:50,280
Speaker 1: to those people exactly. You can always you can always

922
00:53:50,320 --> 00:53:51,920
Speaker 1: reach out to me if you're having a shitty day,

923
00:53:51,920 --> 00:53:52,880
Speaker 1: and I'll get help you.

924
00:53:52,880 --> 00:53:55,719
Speaker 2: Oh, same, Judy. And I appreciate that, I.

925
00:53:55,719 --> 00:54:00,000
Speaker 1: Really do, because I have my little small list, and yeah,

926
00:54:00,080 --> 00:54:02,360
Speaker 1: it's just so fucking important.

927
00:54:02,640 --> 00:54:05,840
Speaker 2: It's so important. Okay, I love that. I love that

928
00:54:05,920 --> 00:54:18,479
Speaker 2: for us. I want to do a lightning round before

929
00:54:18,520 --> 00:54:18,719
Speaker 2: we go.

930
00:54:18,840 --> 00:54:22,239
Speaker 1: Oh boy, I hate these things. Okay, this is no

931
00:54:22,440 --> 00:54:25,040
Speaker 1: because this No, I don't really hate them, but it's

932
00:54:25,080 --> 00:54:28,600
Speaker 1: that whole being in the moment and not going this

933
00:54:28,680 --> 00:54:30,600
Speaker 1: is my first thought. But oh but but but but

934
00:54:30,600 --> 00:54:34,640
Speaker 1: but but but you know, yeah, you can answer any

935
00:54:34,640 --> 00:54:36,640
Speaker 1: way you want, all right, Okay.

936
00:54:41,840 --> 00:54:44,320
Speaker 2: Some of these are just like quiz, like, how many

937
00:54:44,440 --> 00:54:48,680
Speaker 2: episodes of World's Dumbest were you on? Oh my god,

938
00:54:48,800 --> 00:54:53,320
Speaker 2: I have no idea, I think along mind, yes, how many?

939
00:54:53,560 --> 00:54:59,600
Speaker 2: No you guess forty one hundred and fourteen?

940
00:55:00,160 --> 00:55:03,719
Speaker 1: No way, yes, no way. And you know what, we

941
00:55:03,760 --> 00:55:06,399
Speaker 1: don't get residuals.

942
00:55:06,719 --> 00:55:11,040
Speaker 2: Yes, that number, And I was like, holy shit, that's

943
00:55:11,080 --> 00:55:15,959
Speaker 2: a lot of shows. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. Like many

944
00:55:16,000 --> 00:55:19,440
Speaker 2: of our guests, you are a graduate of a prestigious university,

945
00:55:20,120 --> 00:55:24,000
Speaker 2: the School of Law and Order. What was your character's

946
00:55:24,080 --> 00:55:25,640
Speaker 2: name on Law and Order?

947
00:55:26,680 --> 00:55:29,120
Speaker 1: Oh fuck, I don't know. I did Law and Order

948
00:55:29,160 --> 00:55:30,400
Speaker 1: and Law and Order SVU.

949
00:55:30,640 --> 00:55:33,360
Speaker 2: I know, but in Law and Order as you didn't

950
00:55:33,360 --> 00:55:35,000
Speaker 2: have a name. Your character didn't have a name. In

951
00:55:35,080 --> 00:55:38,719
Speaker 2: Law and Order you had a name and no. Well

952
00:55:39,160 --> 00:55:42,000
Speaker 2: but see I love this because someone outside watching and

953
00:55:42,080 --> 00:55:43,960
Speaker 2: be like, how can you not remember you were in

954
00:55:44,360 --> 00:55:46,560
Speaker 2: this iconic show? But you've done so much? I get it.

955
00:55:46,800 --> 00:55:48,160
Speaker 2: Your name was Deborah Patterson.

956
00:55:49,440 --> 00:55:50,640
Speaker 1: Deborah Patterson.

957
00:55:50,800 --> 00:55:51,520
Speaker 3: That's right.

958
00:55:52,920 --> 00:55:57,839
Speaker 1: He already told you he knows nothing about the murder. Okay,

959
00:55:57,880 --> 00:56:00,520
Speaker 1: and I love that. This is the best lie around

960
00:56:00,520 --> 00:56:01,520
Speaker 1: in the entire world.

961
00:56:01,680 --> 00:56:06,040
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, who's the performer you never got to see

962
00:56:06,080 --> 00:56:07,719
Speaker 2: live but wish you had?

963
00:56:08,280 --> 00:56:09,320
Speaker 1: Probably Lenny Bruce.

964
00:56:10,080 --> 00:56:15,560
Speaker 2: Oh talk about dangerous comedy. Yeah yeah, I love that. Okay. Finally,

965
00:56:15,640 --> 00:56:17,240
Speaker 2: when is iced coffee season?

966
00:56:18,920 --> 00:56:24,760
Speaker 1: I hate ice coffee? No, I like, I like coffee

967
00:56:24,800 --> 00:56:27,760
Speaker 1: ice cream, but I want my coffee high.

968
00:56:28,320 --> 00:56:30,000
Speaker 2: Yeah that's the wrong answer, but.

969
00:56:29,960 --> 00:56:37,960
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, ice coffee season is. I'm gonna go mid June.

970
00:56:40,480 --> 00:56:41,080
Speaker 1: Shut up.

971
00:56:42,560 --> 00:56:45,480
Speaker 2: See they disagree with you because the answer is year round, Judy,

972
00:56:45,520 --> 00:56:46,479
Speaker 2: The answer is year round.

973
00:56:46,560 --> 00:56:51,160
Speaker 1: Oh shit, Okay, I don't like it.

974
00:56:51,360 --> 00:56:55,480
Speaker 2: I'm so used to, but I love Massachusetts. I grew

975
00:56:55,560 --> 00:56:58,080
Speaker 2: up with Dunkin Donuts. It is a very important part

976
00:56:58,080 --> 00:57:00,200
Speaker 2: of my life. It's my culture. It's my religion. Right,

977
00:57:00,400 --> 00:57:03,319
Speaker 2: Ice coffee and I yeah, I wanted ice because I

978
00:57:03,320 --> 00:57:05,719
Speaker 2: want to drink it fast. I don't want to sip it.

979
00:57:05,719 --> 00:57:06,520
Speaker 2: It's not precious.

980
00:57:06,800 --> 00:57:09,799
Speaker 1: Oh, I loved I love my fucking hot coffee. I

981
00:57:09,800 --> 00:57:11,560
Speaker 1: grew up with wah wah. Have you ever been to

982
00:57:11,560 --> 00:57:12,080
Speaker 1: wah wah?

983
00:57:12,160 --> 00:57:13,840
Speaker 2: Of course I love the best.

984
00:57:14,080 --> 00:57:15,919
Speaker 1: Wa Wah is the best? Yeah, so good.

985
00:57:16,800 --> 00:57:18,760
Speaker 2: Well, I love you and I love you.

986
00:57:18,560 --> 00:57:20,400
Speaker 1: You're the greatest, No, you are.

987
00:57:20,440 --> 00:57:22,720
Speaker 2: I love this conversation so much. I loved it so

988
00:57:22,840 --> 00:57:27,439
Speaker 2: much too. Thank you. Next week, on Off the Cup,

989
00:57:27,480 --> 00:57:31,200
Speaker 2: I live out my fifteen year old SI Cup fantasy,

990
00:57:31,400 --> 00:57:34,200
Speaker 2: and I get to talk to Brian Austin Green. I

991
00:57:34,240 --> 00:57:36,320
Speaker 2: thought we were going to go in one direction, but man,

992
00:57:36,400 --> 00:57:39,280
Speaker 2: did we go so much deeper. You're so wise.

993
00:57:39,920 --> 00:57:42,720
Speaker 1: I'm not wise like this is. I'm standing on the

994
00:57:42,760 --> 00:57:44,960
Speaker 1: back and the shoulders of many people.

995
00:57:45,440 --> 00:57:47,840
Speaker 2: This is just all the stuff that I've learned. I

996
00:57:47,880 --> 00:57:50,400
Speaker 2: love this, I love it. I have so much in here.

997
00:57:50,880 --> 00:57:53,040
Speaker 2: But I don't care because this is the this is

998
00:57:53,080 --> 00:57:57,880
Speaker 2: the good stuff. Off the Cup is a production of

999
00:57:57,920 --> 00:58:00,960
Speaker 2: iHeart Podcasts as part of the Reason Choy network. If

1000
00:58:00,960 --> 00:58:04,040
Speaker 2: you want more, check out the other reason Choice podcasts S,

1001
00:58:04,120 --> 00:58:07,680
Speaker 2: Politics with Jamel Hill, and Native Land Pod. For Off

1002
00:58:07,680 --> 00:58:10,000
Speaker 2: the Cup, I am your host, Se Cup. Editing and

1003
00:58:10,040 --> 00:58:13,400
Speaker 2: sound design by Derek Clements. Our executive producers are me

1004
00:58:13,720 --> 00:58:17,520
Speaker 2: Se Cup, Lauren Hanson, and Lindsay Hoffman. Rate and review

1005
00:58:17,600 --> 00:58:21,240
Speaker 2: wherever you get your podcasts, Follow or subscribe for new

1006
00:58:21,280 --> 00:58:28,000
Speaker 2: episodes every Wednesday.