Speaker 1: Yes, Hello, this is Eddie Pepitone reporting from his bunker.
Speaker 1: I had the Bachelor. I think it's unbelievable that Jubilee
Speaker 1: is gone. Um, but you know, you know, she wasn't
Speaker 1: gonna make it because she is actually somewhat of a
Speaker 1: human being as opposed to the other Stepford women in
Speaker 1: that uh vapid vapid show that seems to never get better.
Speaker 1: They went to Mexico City, all of them were flown
Speaker 1: and coach. How horrific is that they were flown Coach
Speaker 1: ABC could not fly them first class? That is unbelievable.
Speaker 1: But I just want to say, you know that when
Speaker 1: you eliminate someone like Jubilee, you're eliminating people who defend
Speaker 1: our country. And if we don't have people defending our country,
Speaker 1: then really, what good is reality TV if it's not
Speaker 1: gonna reward the people who have served. Uh, these other
Speaker 1: people the only thing they have served are there complete narcissistic,
Speaker 1: crazy egos. Um, it's just you know, again, this is
Speaker 1: you know, me ragging on the show and hating it
Speaker 1: and uh just you know, like, uh, you know, Olivia
Speaker 1: obviously the villain, and oh she's so bad, but the
Speaker 1: twin breakdown. What's your name? I just call him the twins,
Speaker 1: But Emily, I guess Um her breakdown was a little overstated.
Speaker 1: But basically, you know, my message is the same, is
Speaker 1: that this show is that is is a harbinger of um,
Speaker 1: the fact that these are our last days on earth.
Speaker 1: They really are our last days on Earth. There's no
Speaker 1: way that a show like this can be on with
Speaker 1: without there being consequences to us, you know, as a civilization.
Speaker 1: This is this is obviously, you know, uh, something that
Speaker 1: can't not be ignored. That we are letting this go
Speaker 1: on as a civilization, and it shows that we've lost
Speaker 1: track of what is real, what is important. Um. The
Speaker 1: fact that millions of people watch this show shows you
Speaker 1: how disconnected people are from the earth, from God, from spirit,
Speaker 1: from nature. Again, you know, I'll reiterate what I said
Speaker 1: and in my last communicate, they now feel like communicates
Speaker 1: from a bunker. Um is that you know, we we
Speaker 1: we are having all kinds of eco catastrophes. Right here
Speaker 1: in l A. There's a southern California gas leak which
Speaker 1: goes unplugged and untalked about. Yet people are talking about
Speaker 1: the Bachelor. They recap it um my my um goal
Speaker 1: on this podcast is just to keep hammering home the
Speaker 1: point that if you are interested in any of this,
Speaker 1: that you need to, um, I don't know, stay still,
Speaker 1: start to meditate. Paint, you know, just paint. Getta getta
Speaker 1: get some get a palette of paints and just see
Speaker 1: how purple and red mix. Um, you know, look at
Speaker 1: a tree, deeply, look at look at birds. Go take
Speaker 1: a walk in nature. Every city has a botanical garden. Um.
Speaker 1: This kind of quote unquote guilty pleasure. It it doesn't work.
Speaker 1: It it takes us further away, further away from uh
Speaker 1: family and love, you know, because this is this show
Speaker 1: is the opposite of what love is. This show is
Speaker 1: just the cruelty to these women and um, the the
Speaker 1: the guy, the central guy is you know, such a
Speaker 1: blank slate of horrible emptiness. So anyway, this has been
Speaker 1: Edti Pepitoe. I hope you're enjoying The Bachelor, No entering
Speaker 1: nervous dot com. Oh yeah, I'm going to get all
Speaker 1: the feels. So oh, I'm just got one of the
Speaker 1: questions when you read this roll roll to your words,
Speaker 1: very white owning you're the ghost are very white? Hello,
Speaker 1: Ladies of gentlemen, Happy, Happy fifth episode of Will You
Speaker 1: Accept This? Oh my god, I am here with my
Speaker 1: co host Daron fully Hello, and a very special Bachelor fan,
Speaker 1: Misfortune Feamster. I feel like we all feel a little
Speaker 1: haggard this morning. Is that I am exhausted. I am
Speaker 1: absolutely pooped. Well, we had a bit, you know that
Speaker 1: takes a while to get through all of those episodes.
Speaker 1: This is Aaron and I did a show here at
Speaker 1: Meltdown Less, and I feel like we had a sleepover
Speaker 1: and I got home. We were here to like midnight,
Speaker 1: and then I was like, at some point in my life,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be in my sweatpants in the loving arms
Speaker 1: of Ben Higgins and everything's gonna be okay. We both
Speaker 1: powered through in the morning because you have watched two
Speaker 1: hours of the show, and then I watched an hour
Speaker 1: of The Bachelor Lives. Oh my god, I didn't. I
Speaker 1: didn't badge barely. You guys are as dedicated. Fortunately you're
Speaker 1: on the Mindy Project right now. That what do you play?
Speaker 1: I play a nurse who southern and gay. It's hard way,
Speaker 1: I bet them trying to put myself in that. You know, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: you do? Do you do? Like a lot of like
Speaker 1: playing doctor with people. Yeah, like nurse clogs and stuff.
Speaker 1: I get to wear scrubs every day. Must be you're
Speaker 1: nailing it right. Anytime I have to dress up in
Speaker 1: a scene, they put me floral clothes and putting a
Speaker 1: floral button up with a sports jacket because that's your look,
Speaker 1: because they know what your jam is. They know what
Speaker 1: you're jam because I'm a Southern lady. Well, here's the
Speaker 1: thing I have to say, Like, I have no interesting
Speaker 1: going into medicine, but the thought of being able to
Speaker 1: basically wear pajamas to work, so hold on, I would
Speaker 1: really throw in the towel. I mean, if I could
Speaker 1: just make so much fun. Granted they're under a lot
Speaker 1: of pressure, but I mean so are we. I I
Speaker 1: got to bed a too watching the baths, watching the
Speaker 1: bath dramas, and those six figure salaries. I mean, really
Speaker 1: do they not nurses? Doctor? Well, nurses high end like
Speaker 1: nurse practitioners. By one time, I one time nurses Toati.
Speaker 1: They like travel around. They like travel around, like they
Speaker 1: go like sort of on tour. I had to have
Speaker 1: an operation at this doctor. They were like, She's like okay,
Speaker 1: so we're gonna put you under and we're gonna give
Speaker 1: you a cath at her And literally that's what I
Speaker 1: was like. I heard the weird Catherine and I was like, no,
Speaker 1: I thought we were friends, like it was. Her name
Speaker 1: was like Melinda, Melinda, come on you and my boot.
Speaker 1: I was like, like, I promise it won't be the table.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna be the table. Wait, what do you mean?
Speaker 1: Nurses travel like they're specific, Like you get hired to
Speaker 1: travel as a nurse, but not every nurse the old
Speaker 1: Traveling Nurse show, what are you guys talking? They could
Speaker 1: go from like Alaska. No, they I swear, they get
Speaker 1: like assigned to a city in a hospital and they
Speaker 1: go there for like yes, and they could take And
Speaker 1: that's kind of okay. Let's get down to brass tax.
Speaker 1: Want to be controversial. I get it. This show the
Speaker 1: Traveling Nurse traveling, Oh my god, yes, let's go sell
Speaker 1: it probably was a show traveling. Everybody get an enty
Speaker 1: got to be like drinking and I'm sure, um, okay,
Speaker 1: you guys, let's get down to brass tax. And this
Speaker 1: is not the most important thing that happened in the episode,
Speaker 1: but I just want to point out that is it
Speaker 1: me or did Amanda sleep in full face when he
Speaker 1: woke her up? And why were they all sharing bit
Speaker 1: the first? Are they that broke? This show has been
Speaker 1: on for twenty this is the broke season. Yes, there's
Speaker 1: no extravagant day. You know what he said when when
Speaker 1: we heard some say that faced every little girl stream
Speaker 1: is to go to fashion week in Mexico City. The
Speaker 1: Paris budgets were long. I will have they think it
Speaker 1: out of Ireland. It was like American Ireland. I was like,
Speaker 1: oh this this, I mean a couple of seasons ago
Speaker 1: they were doing you know, is stam bowl in the
Speaker 1: sister you know? I mean it's me is to be
Speaker 1: in fashion making Mexico City looking at your guy in
Speaker 1: the worst shirt that has that shirt that we're getting
Speaker 1: way ahead of her. But Norkay. They there's always like
Speaker 1: stardless of where they go. There's a table set up
Speaker 1: somewhere with a thousand candles. Yes, And I feel like
Speaker 1: there's no romance with anyone. I don't think Ben ends
Speaker 1: up with anyone. Oh my god, back it up, plate. Sorry,
Speaker 1: I have a lot of opinions, but I want to
Speaker 1: say I feel like Ben I've been very bored by him.
Speaker 1: I hate him. He's so boring. But this week I
Speaker 1: don't hate him. But this week I feel like the
Speaker 1: way he dealt with Jubilee and stuff, part of me
Speaker 1: was like, he's actually like a night he can communicate.
Speaker 1: He's boring. To take my own life. Okay, where do
Speaker 1: you want to start, Aaron? I want to start in
Speaker 1: the opening line of Mexico People, Mexico City, when people
Speaker 1: are just handing him cue cards and he said the
Speaker 1: quote where people are always friendly? Really, has any been
Speaker 1: anyone anybody read the paper about Mexico City where everyone
Speaker 1: where people are abducted like every other day. Don't talk
Speaker 1: about a red light or see a white day. I'm
Speaker 1: sure they're friendly when they're taking you hostage. I love
Speaker 1: the Mexico the sponsor all of a sudden there like
Speaker 1: this is gonna get people to really think twice about
Speaker 1: our country. It's like twenty minute add for that market
Speaker 1: like Mercado to like like give me every market in America,
Speaker 1: like oh we can buy like beef jerky, and why
Speaker 1: there's a restaurant on top, and he goes, everybody knows
Speaker 1: Mexico City has the best one in the world. They
Speaker 1: do watching the whitest man in America, scream evil. Next
Speaker 1: and those evil and professional chefs didn't even cook the
Speaker 1: cook these dumb beatches, oh my god, to make salmon,
Speaker 1: Oh my god. And then tacos there like the the
Speaker 1: instructions are in Spanish. It's like, well, then, how then
Speaker 1: did any of them make mullick? These those two like
Speaker 1: tweetle the and tweedled dumb. I don't know whoever made
Speaker 1: that rest. And then the professional chefs go, this recipe
Speaker 1: should be in our restaurant, and I was like, this
Speaker 1: rest is gonna be closing for you, Oh my god.
Speaker 1: And a woman is ready for marriage. When chill I
Speaker 1: wanted to kill kill, I wrote down kill kill me,
Speaker 1: I wrote down what a woman? And though I wrote
Speaker 1: on I'll never get married, that's the Latino machesemo. Yeah,
Speaker 1: in fact that he did. He did obviously pause because
Speaker 1: he knew he was going to get and he said, well,
Speaker 1: it's a very old time tradition. My god. It was
Speaker 1: because it was a sister who said it. No, it
Speaker 1: wass telling nurse And okay, fucking are you kidding me?
Speaker 1: I mean a hot air balloon? How many back up
Speaker 1: to the first Daly I mean, okay, we've had a helicopter,
Speaker 1: We've had a biplane. I mean, I was just gonna
Speaker 1: jet packs catapultry catapult next week. Spa Argentine is because
Speaker 1: they use flying as metaphors relationships constantly. They're like, if
Speaker 1: our if our love can have heat and still above everyone,
Speaker 1: then we know we can make it in life. Oh
Speaker 1: my god. Yeah. So okay, So Amanda, right, the mom,
Speaker 1: you can face you can make love work if you
Speaker 1: if you successfully float over an atron city. How many
Speaker 1: times did they say atron city about the pyramids? Like
Speaker 1: you don't know, you don't We're literally just bullet point
Speaker 1: when you Okay, so she's a mom watching. It's like,
Speaker 1: here's what's scary about him is he legitimately does seem
Speaker 1: sincere when he's talking to everyone. So they are all
Speaker 1: opening up and it's like he's not going to marry Amanda.
Speaker 1: I don't think he picks anybody. I think he picks
Speaker 1: all five. I think he does like a like a thrumbull.
Speaker 1: He does feel like he sink, I'm so excited her
Speaker 1: like a man. He loves me. All those bands. You
Speaker 1: guys aren't watching Bachelor Love, but watch Bachelorve. He does
Speaker 1: not seem like he's in what way? In what way?
Speaker 1: He's just like there's like this melancholy about I don't
Speaker 1: think he knows what like to how to fall in love,
Speaker 1: Like I don't really. There was a girl that I
Speaker 1: met who did something, she filmed something for a future
Speaker 1: Bachelor Live, and she said that he just seemed really dumb,
Speaker 1: like really nice and really dumb. He just doesn't have
Speaker 1: much person He didn't pick that up already. I'm a
Speaker 1: great he just has no personality. Maybe he's madly love it,
Speaker 1: doesn't know how to express it. I don't know. I
Speaker 1: feel like he's got a full khaki wardrobe because of
Speaker 1: these boring it could also start. Yeah, I mean we
Speaker 1: hated want Pablo, but at least he was like controversial,
Speaker 1: don't you. I mean I miss Caitlin mis Caitlin. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like I was like the bachelorettes. I know, I relaxed
Speaker 1: more when it's a bachelorette because you know, you know,
Speaker 1: I get protective of the ladies. But there's it's for me.
Speaker 1: It's so much more entertaining when you've got twenty lady lunatics.
Speaker 1: It really does bring out everyone's insecurity. Well, it's weird
Speaker 1: when you have to act sweet and nice, like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm so happy for you fortune you get the day card,
Speaker 1: I'm so happy for you, even though like, yeah, it's
Speaker 1: like the weirdest, Like you have to be like supportive
Speaker 1: of your sister wife. Yeah, you have to make friends
Speaker 1: in the house and try to win him over. It's
Speaker 1: a lot going on at one time, Caylin Kayla sex panther,
Speaker 1: there's something, don't well, let's talk about mom. Let's talk
Speaker 1: about the date with Amanda. He's not gonna I mean,
Speaker 1: he's not gonna pick her. I mean, but he's sweet
Speaker 1: and yeah, she's sweets. I'm sure she has real origin. Well,
Speaker 1: I said, my voice is crazy, but her voice next level.
Speaker 1: That's the thing. I'm like, what happened? What damage happened?
Speaker 1: You know what I mean? Like it's so hot. I
Speaker 1: just then I felt so bad. Like the story. First
Speaker 1: of all, I know how many women, how many ladies
Speaker 1: told the story of their boys? Anyone dating anyone? He
Speaker 1: was glassing over by the time the map that we
Speaker 1: had to read. The teacher from Michigan said the same thing,
Speaker 1: like how many Like he was glass et over at
Speaker 1: one point I saw him raise a flair gun and
Speaker 1: he started shooting the fair but he has to keep
Speaker 1: them around for the single moms around for a few
Speaker 1: episodes because he has to be like, she's going to
Speaker 1: make you. Do you think she's gonna make Top three?
Speaker 1: I wanted to kill myself how many times? When every
Speaker 1: time that McDonald's ad and I wanted to kill myself?
Speaker 1: Are you? And then that? Because I'm new into the
Speaker 1: other Bachelor couples, like I like breakfast and I like lunch, Like,
Speaker 1: whoever that was that the virgin? I don't know who
Speaker 1: that is? I want to yah, it's the yeah, the Sean.
Speaker 1: You're especially crossed over when you're doing the fucking. I
Speaker 1: would take the money and these are just like they
Speaker 1: get them like I feel like they get small money.
Speaker 1: I feel like the Bachelor like commercial money. For sure.
Speaker 1: We all right, So there's nothing really to say about that.
Speaker 1: It's so boring, man. The only thing that struck me
Speaker 1: was the fact that she slept in like full eyelashes
Speaker 1: of makeup. That was okay, So then the wake up
Speaker 1: scene was pretty exciting. The spatch this batchless I know,
Speaker 1: and the girl with the girl with the with the retainer,
Speaker 1: I mean I sleep with the retainer ear plugs in
Speaker 1: his sleep masks. So stop bragging. Okay. So then they
Speaker 1: go to the cooking thing. When he said quote cooking
Speaker 1: is my thing. I'm the spachelor, I wanted to kill
Speaker 1: myself again. I just at one point does Ben look
Speaker 1: at the producers and be like, no, I'm not going
Speaker 1: to deliver that line because I'll like, I'll just I'm
Speaker 1: a stachelor. I literally pause it and I was like,
Speaker 1: it's I almost called you. This cannot when can he
Speaker 1: put his foot down? The thing is he does he
Speaker 1: does talk to and I think you're right. He talks
Speaker 1: to every single woman like they're a princess. Yeah, like
Speaker 1: I'm so happy and this is gonna happen. So they
Speaker 1: all go back like and they think at the point,
Speaker 1: it's like, just really tell me how you're feeling. Because
Speaker 1: they all feel like they're the one. It actually makes
Speaker 1: them like a psychopath. Data several people like that where
Speaker 1: you think that you're the greatest thing they've ever met,
Speaker 1: that you're gonna be with him forever and then and
Speaker 1: you never fight. Everything is wonderful, and then one day
Speaker 1: they're just like dump you and you're like, wait, what
Speaker 1: winding it. You also see like he's the common denominator,
Speaker 1: like they're not crazy, Like he is treating him all
Speaker 1: like I can't the same in the future. Oh my god. Also,
Speaker 1: how many times do these women like, do you pause
Speaker 1: that show and go? Has anybody watched the show before?
Speaker 1: You are going to be on competing with nine other women?
Speaker 1: I know, Okay, sometimes I can refer went down hard.
Speaker 1: She's such a catch, But man, she shot herself on
Speaker 1: the you know, she got I want to be able
Speaker 1: to I think about myself in that position. I've dated
Speaker 1: girls before where it was a non committed relationship and
Speaker 1: I would go like and you like, just thinking about
Speaker 1: them with other people, I would be a different I
Speaker 1: would actually such a weirdo. But Jubilie, it is the
Speaker 1: premise of the show. But I think, but I think
Speaker 1: people think they can handle it. Until she got unfun.
Speaker 1: She became like a total It's weird because she was
Speaker 1: totally unraveling. Then she's like, boom, I just made the
Speaker 1: world's best dinner. Then she was like happy face and
Speaker 1: then unraveled. Now that and the Spanish lesson, I also
Speaker 1: once again, why the Spanish lesson? We could we also
Speaker 1: talk about how I wrote this down that every time
Speaker 1: Olivia speaks, well, first of all, six small children die. Um,
Speaker 1: every time she speaks, she's she's it's like she's mastering
Speaker 1: the art of saying something that did not happen, Like
Speaker 1: every she rewrites it, SERI, She's like did you seek
Speaker 1: and no one did know? When he literally talked to
Speaker 1: you the same way he talks to same time terrible
Speaker 1: sish and the music that they've started playing for like
Speaker 1: what like they play it with like it's got like
Speaker 1: crazy because like they like clearly the life basically like
Speaker 1: even if she was saying like normal ship that they're
Speaker 1: playing it like here goes lunatic, Let's play the lunatic
Speaker 1: from the Lunatic. And then her mouth goes open and
Speaker 1: then she's like alligator like when she you are mine,
Speaker 1: I am yours. I think when she's only twenty three,
Speaker 1: I'm like, she's thirty five five, she's TV she's anchored,
Speaker 1: and I'm thirty three and I can I can play,
Speaker 1: can play? I can just ty the way is she
Speaker 1: actually like I party. I'm watching her. It's like I
Speaker 1: think we may have another like like oh, like you
Speaker 1: actually might be mentally ill you know and my friends.
Speaker 1: I think she got fired from the news job. I'm
Speaker 1: sure she did because she also was in love with
Speaker 1: her boss that had you know, a wife and four kids.
Speaker 1: Did you read that somewhere? No, I'm just saying she's
Speaker 1: got that. Tell me more how much how much you
Speaker 1: want to bet there's gonna seem when she's like, I
Speaker 1: put a chip in your shoulder, I'm tracking your every
Speaker 1: moment like there, it's gonna get like a little so scary.
Speaker 1: Can I grab you? You're gonna be my tea? And
Speaker 1: I do hate how she's constantly the first want to
Speaker 1: get when she's already got a Rose. I'm like, bitch.
Speaker 1: And the fact that he doesn't say anything crazy, I'm
Speaker 1: just I would be like, just say to her, Hey,
Speaker 1: we just did our whole cooking thing today. Let me
Speaker 1: let me just talk to a few girls and I'll
Speaker 1: be back to I like that. The twin Emily Rose
Speaker 1: actually had some fucking I Emily's really blossomed without her twins.
Speaker 1: But then she calls her twin like wrong number dial again.
Speaker 1: I know we're getting ahead of myself, But the greatest
Speaker 1: line I think I would put up for one of
Speaker 1: the greatest lines in any best season was I'm emotional.
Speaker 1: I know I'm emotional. It really makes you deep down,
Speaker 1: dig deep inside and figure out who the fuck you
Speaker 1: are in a good way. I think makes you dantie
Speaker 1: and figure out who the funk you are. Your trade
Speaker 1: and by the way, she looked different. She looked actually
Speaker 1: more like like real person. She got her strength because
Speaker 1: she ate her twin and became super human or the
Speaker 1: other one is just like like seeping out of the
Speaker 1: side of her ribs there, it's just like a blonde
Speaker 1: we've coming out of the side of Haley. Can we
Speaker 1: gona say, I'm gonna I'm gonna nominate her best wine
Speaker 1: is all the taco ship. My taco taste delicious. I
Speaker 1: can't wait for them to taste my taco, my tacoco,
Speaker 1: over and over again the taco. And she didn't look
Speaker 1: like she was like even being silly. Well, she said,
Speaker 1: that's what I mean. That's why I was like, is
Speaker 1: there any way possible Jojo didn't get the taco my taco,
Speaker 1: and they and the producers kept feeding her cue cards
Speaker 1: saying say, I know, my tacos tastes good, Like I
Speaker 1: was losing my mom or there's some producer that they
Speaker 1: cut out being like, yes, so you like your taco. Oh,
Speaker 1: I like taco, and to really tell me more about
Speaker 1: your taco. My taco is great, and you just say,
Speaker 1: just cut the sound. I actually don't think your tacos
Speaker 1: taste well. Oh my tacos taste well, that totally could
Speaker 1: be it. Yeah, I would love to do that job.
Speaker 1: I want to be that producer for one day. Really,
Speaker 1: I don't think your talko. I think her taco, my taco,
Speaker 1: my taco, My taco brings all the boys to the yark. Yes,
Speaker 1: keep that, keep it, and saying agag be Mexico the
Speaker 1: best food in the world. Fuck you Paris, Mexico. Think Mexico.
Speaker 1: You thinkshi fashion n delicate food. It's like someone ate
Speaker 1: a bunch of rose petals and threw up on ben shirt.
Speaker 1: That was okay, let's get to that part of a kimono.
Speaker 1: Sew on to a white talk show. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: oh my god, and all the models like I've been
Speaker 1: modeling for five years, batch like, oh my god, I
Speaker 1: give one day. She had great legs, so I have
Speaker 1: to say, Lauren whatever. All the models like we've been kidnapped.
Speaker 1: We don't know where we are. I'm a model, that
Speaker 1: is that what I am having? We haven't we're rich,
Speaker 1: we haven't seen our families in five years. There we're
Speaker 1: making hell for ransom. Do you guys remember? This is
Speaker 1: so random? But the whole model scene made me laugh
Speaker 1: so hard because it reminded me of The Brady Bunch movie,
Speaker 1: which is such like totally random. But I hands down
Speaker 1: think the Brady Bunch movie is one of the funniest
Speaker 1: movies I've ever seen, because there was this moment where
Speaker 1: Marcia goes to model and she's sitting down with like
Speaker 1: this gorgeous model and Marcia's like, oh um, and it's
Speaker 1: like they're modeling for jeans, and Marsha's like, who do
Speaker 1: you model for? And the woman goes guess and she
Speaker 1: goes okay, um ash cosh ba gosh, and she's like
Speaker 1: yes and she's okay um. Like it literally made me cry.
Speaker 1: Apparently I'm the only one that that's seen the scene. Um,
Speaker 1: but it just made me think of oh my god,
Speaker 1: moments that he doesn't want to funk her. They are friends,
Speaker 1: they are in the friend zone. What do you say bones,
Speaker 1: They're not the nurse, the kindergarten teacher, teacher, He's like, oh,
Speaker 1: you know, like, is that Michigan accident? No offense Michigan,
Speaker 1: but watch your mouth? My girlfriend? Is that like? And
Speaker 1: he gave her the rose. I was was anybody's surprised
Speaker 1: that he gave her? I thought maybe this was it's
Speaker 1: a pussy. He doesn't know how to just yea like
Speaker 1: he doesn't know how to just be like yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't want to get in the see myself with her.
Speaker 1: And I was like no, what No, she's not awful,
Speaker 1: like she's a nice person, but she's so boring and
Speaker 1: I can't stand here. Quite frankly, I like to say,
Speaker 1: I just find annoying. Who the fuck is Leah? Who's Leah?
Speaker 1: She actually is an extra side pond her hair, But
Speaker 1: there's no girl to me that's like standing out as like, oh,
Speaker 1: you know, they have an amazing kind I think that
Speaker 1: I feel like the flight attend there's a white dress
Speaker 1: that they like made out outside and she goes like
Speaker 1: a life with you, like a life like a jewel.
Speaker 1: She was like jewels, She don't look like jewel. Thank you. Yes,
Speaker 1: she's Lauren Lauren Lauren Lauren Lauren br b right, I can't.
Speaker 1: I don't like that. Can you re enact that scene? Please?
Speaker 1: You be Lauren By, I'll be, I'll be Ben. You
Speaker 1: be the viewer, be the door, You be the door.
Speaker 1: They were so, um, how is how is everything going?
Speaker 1: It was just really I just feel really happy every
Speaker 1: time I see you, know, I just want you to
Speaker 1: know a bything about it. And it's like, what have
Speaker 1: you been thinking? I can't see a life with you?
Speaker 1: Really no? I mean like not just like a wedding,
Speaker 1: like a like a future, like a life, like a life,
Speaker 1: like like a life as long as I'm a light
Speaker 1: light and then after you die, like more life like
Speaker 1: great craptop. I'm wearing a craptop. I like a life.
Speaker 1: I'm a stewardess on a biplane. A stewardess on a
Speaker 1: fucking biplane. Okay, I feel like you're in it for
Speaker 1: the right reasons. Yeah, he had it, Thank you so much?
Speaker 1: Yeah he okay fine. Janner Boobs in the Moonlight made
Speaker 1: a move and she said the phrase, and she said
Speaker 1: the phrase, I just want you to know, once I
Speaker 1: commit to someone, you'll have my heart and soul forever.
Speaker 1: I feel like that's the line she said before. And
Speaker 1: then I'm like, where the other guys that you've said, like,
Speaker 1: how many other people have your heart and soul forever?
Speaker 1: That's a poison song. That's like the deal with the devil? Um?
Speaker 1: Can we break down? Olivia? You know there's this moment
Speaker 1: it's in every bachelor bachelorette when the women turn right,
Speaker 1: but then it's always the first one, usually one. But
Speaker 1: this is like tag team anti Olivia. But when you
Speaker 1: use your one on one time to bitch about someone else,
Speaker 1: it's the kiss of death. It is the kiss of
Speaker 1: death and the history of that. But someone has to
Speaker 1: be someone has to take Emily really rolls up in
Speaker 1: my I was like, she took the bullet. It wasn't right.
Speaker 1: She had a sense of maybe those girls realized, listen,
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna He's not gonna pick me, So what's
Speaker 1: gonna be My story? My story is gonna be I
Speaker 1: will take that bit there. I was surprised that the Amanda,
Speaker 1: when he asked her about it, didn't say yeah, she
Speaker 1: called me teen mom. Yet Oh, I just assumed she
Speaker 1: told him that they didn't edit it in that she
Speaker 1: told that she said teen mom like three times. But
Speaker 1: this is why I think Olivia or something crying it's
Speaker 1: either like an ass burgers or something, or just like
Speaker 1: an evil because she realized or maybe it's like the
Speaker 1: most beautiful editing of which is because she definitely realized,
Speaker 1: like oh God, like this isn't like I'm on the
Speaker 1: hot seat after teen mom, because everyone's just like, oh,
Speaker 1: go funk yourself. And then she didn't almost have the
Speaker 1: words to be like sorrytive. It was so weird. It
Speaker 1: was such a bully move. I think a lot of
Speaker 1: bullies like cry, like when they it's like such because
Speaker 1: anybody gonna do like, okay, don't worry about like it's
Speaker 1: such a fucking manipulative and I like that. Emily was like,
Speaker 1: I'm not buying or crocodile. Here is the twin roses
Speaker 1: are broken thumb from the ash, never acknowledged, never acknowledged
Speaker 1: she broke her thumb in that soccer match. Well the
Speaker 1: way that the way that people if you're in the
Speaker 1: wrong and you aren't mature enough to admit it, you cry, yeah,
Speaker 1: because then you're like the victim. Yeah, then you'd be like, no,
Speaker 1: don't worry about it. Maybe she's like still wearing an
Speaker 1: adult typer. Oh my god, you guys, let's talk. I
Speaker 1: mean American hero. Yeah. I felt that she became a
Speaker 1: dress and I liked her. She was a babe. She
Speaker 1: couldn't handle the heat of the most insane set up.
Speaker 1: She yeah, she you know, he got turned off because
Speaker 1: she was basically like, you need to make me feel
Speaker 1: special and so like she was doing that thing that
Speaker 1: you can do in real life that girls do of like, okay,
Speaker 1: you're gonna be like that, I'm all icu until you
Speaker 1: pay me attention. But on this show it doesn't work.
Speaker 1: In real life, that would totally work for her because
Speaker 1: it got wait wait, wait, wait wait what Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I'm sorry because you know she's standing up first,
Speaker 1: so like you're not gonna do that to me, But
Speaker 1: it didn't work on the show. You got it, you
Speaker 1: got her at the mercy of that guy. Unfortunately you can't.
Speaker 1: You got no. And that's what sucks is that you
Speaker 1: can't like put boundaries like you wouldn't. Boundaries are on
Speaker 1: the cloth. You slut, get married, you gotta put out.
Speaker 1: You gotta tell him you're in love with them. You
Speaker 1: want to be this family. He's perfect. He has never
Speaker 1: made one mistake in his life. Everything he thinks is right.
Speaker 1: That's what you have to do. And angel walking among us.
Speaker 1: Somebody dropped the elbomb last night. Who was it? Maybe
Speaker 1: not to him? Well, Olivia say love. I don't think
Speaker 1: anybody else, somebody else that I love him to someone
Speaker 1: I can't remember who, Olivia to the camera. It's always
Speaker 1: like it's always when they're down to the top four
Speaker 1: where they're like, I guess what is this. I'm I'm
Speaker 1: in love with you. You have to get out of
Speaker 1: the limo and say you're falling in love like you
Speaker 1: got it, Like there's barrel, rollout, barrel, rollout, rollout, jump out,
Speaker 1: and be like straight up in love. As soon as
Speaker 1: I got out of that limo, I just fell in love.
Speaker 1: I saw you there and you were white, and I thought, yes,
Speaker 1: really boring. It's so boring, so boring. This season we're
Speaker 1: in emails during the show where is Nick fucking Caitlin
Speaker 1: in the church? Where I'm so bored. Yeah, they need
Speaker 1: they need more, like drama. It's so boring. Wait, there's
Speaker 1: a couple of good lines randomly that I wrote down.
Speaker 1: First of all, Becca's top side or the top bun.
Speaker 1: Anyone is there someone that can do hair? Rebecca literally
Speaker 1: was a bun on top of her head. It wasn't like,
Speaker 1: we are you turning butter right after the bun comes down?
Speaker 1: How about Jennifer dropped that line. I forget who she
Speaker 1: was talking about. She said, oh, the twin they were
Speaker 1: cooking together. She's I don't think her palette has expanded
Speaker 1: best the kid's menu yet like that, and then because family,
Speaker 1: she goes candy. That was like one of my favorite
Speaker 1: acted on her. They still have for her profession is
Speaker 1: twin even though that her other Twitter is gone, they
Speaker 1: still locked in hard for the profession. I still want
Speaker 1: to know, because you brought it up last week or
Speaker 1: two weeks ago, what professional twin in Vegas? She is
Speaker 1: a pro? I looked it up. I became obsessed because
Speaker 1: they're like because she was saying during the talent thing,
Speaker 1: I'm so glad our mom did this. We were in
Speaker 1: public at because of our work. So I'm like, what
Speaker 1: the ffessional professional twins? They're pro twins? No, yeah, they're
Speaker 1: like pro they like go to like twin things. Oh
Speaker 1: really yeah. Also that's why they took home because it
Speaker 1: was like a stick stick obviously, well obviously, but but
Speaker 1: they you know, it's good for her to them both
Speaker 1: away because I feel like you enable they enable each
Speaker 1: other to be But you all spent a lot of
Speaker 1: time apart totally. And I also think it's you know,
Speaker 1: we're fraternal, so it's a lot healthier. No, it isn't
Speaker 1: been good for himily to rise. You needs some time away,
Speaker 1: and when you want time away, you want it in
Speaker 1: Mexico City where everybody is friendly. You guys, I have
Speaker 1: to know Eddie peppertone will be sending in his thoughts.
Speaker 1: I think there was a moment. So Eddie Pepperton is
Speaker 1: our co host. He's in Atlanta right now. There was
Speaker 1: a moment he hated it, and then there was a
Speaker 1: moment where he felt for it. And now he's realized
Speaker 1: that it's two hours and he hates it so much.
Speaker 1: We're so much and I was watching still hates it.
Speaker 1: He loved it. Now he's back. He's back too. I
Speaker 1: think I think watching it this week now, I always
Speaker 1: watched like kind of worrying about Eddie watching it, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my god, Eddie in the hot air,
Speaker 1: like because like if you're not a die hard fan.
Speaker 1: Last night's episode was kind of boring. It was the
Speaker 1: word yeah, I wrote down it like one of the
Speaker 1: summaries are feelings are scary? Um, it feels like a
Speaker 1: lot of people have feelings and they're scared. But they
Speaker 1: went from Chris Souls is the last one. I'm like,
Speaker 1: they can't get anyone more boring than this guy. And
Speaker 1: I've not been would be better, but he's if we
Speaker 1: talk about this and all like in all seriousness, his
Speaker 1: it feels like every time he's with you know, whatever contestant,
Speaker 1: he literally it's almost like like an Alanan thing, like
Speaker 1: he has to make them feel like you really I
Speaker 1: kind of feel like there could be a three way
Speaker 1: tie and you have no idea who's going to pick
Speaker 1: because he I think he's trying so hard to be
Speaker 1: the perfect guy. Like the first episode he was with
Speaker 1: his parents. I love the parents and Mary Forever, I
Speaker 1: love God, And so he's like doing that. Then he's
Speaker 1: like I love the black girl, I love the mom.
Speaker 1: I'm like, you have I don't think an opinion. He's
Speaker 1: like the guy would go for really strong like in Olivia,
Speaker 1: some girl that just takes some of it's by the
Speaker 1: way in twos sixteen, Like how outdated is it just
Speaker 1: to have like the white Like, you know, Kayla is
Speaker 1: the only one who looks like she may have a
Speaker 1: little flate, Like it's like, how dated is it just
Speaker 1: have like twelve white girls left? Like that's so I
Speaker 1: would love to see a handsome black bachelor. Yes, gay
Speaker 1: black anything, but like the whitest. Why hasn't Logo done
Speaker 1: a gay bachelor bachelor? It's like the most obvious program
Speaker 1: MTV did. That was my god, that of the funniest
Speaker 1: things I did. I did it mad TV with her
Speaker 1: and she like she like she's like one of those
Speaker 1: people who couldn't stop about like how like raw she
Speaker 1: was because she's been wucking so hard the night before.
Speaker 1: We're like like it was like girl, like we get
Speaker 1: it your Tela tequila, but like the cameras aren't rolling,
Speaker 1: you know, we're just in the makeup chair. Va. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was so weird, we get it. I know what
Speaker 1: that's your thing? Like, you know you could ease up
Speaker 1: for tequila. You know you've got to back up to
Speaker 1: Mrqula be a lady and conclusion fortune, who do you
Speaker 1: think is going to take it all I'm I don't
Speaker 1: love any of the love stories. You know, they're so boring.
Speaker 1: I mean I could care less at this point who
Speaker 1: he ends up with. And I've never felt that way
Speaker 1: in a Bachelor's season. I mean, would you even you
Speaker 1: who were I was like, uh, let's say you were dating? Yeah,
Speaker 1: who would you pick? You? Who? God to see the
Speaker 1: problem this season is so boring that I haven't really
Speaker 1: been I haven't invested in any of the girls, so
Speaker 1: I don't know anyone's name. Would you pick? He picked Tubes?
Speaker 1: Tubes is hot? Um, I think you know. The question
Speaker 1: would be like who do you see yourself winding up with?
Speaker 1: And who do you want to bang? Okay, who do
Speaker 1: you want to bang? Who would you wind up with? Well?
Speaker 1: You know I said this before, but like you know,
Speaker 1: pre Olivia being like a nightmare, she was your physical Yeah. Before.
Speaker 1: Now now you're like, oh God, there's a breath issue
Speaker 1: fad we all didn't see. On the Bashet Alive, someone
Speaker 1: asked him does she really have bad breath? And he
Speaker 1: avoided the question. If she didn't have bad breath, he
Speaker 1: was just like, that's that's called out the mint. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I find I find Jubilee the most like, dynamic and attractive.
Speaker 1: I am a little bit worried about the tanking self esteem?
Speaker 1: Yeah right for him? No, no, no, no, I'm talking
Speaker 1: about for yourself. Yeah. Jojo is cool. Jojo is cool.
Speaker 1: I have to you know, I don't know. I have
Speaker 1: a small blonde problem. So yet would be with my girlfriend.
Speaker 1: Fantastic answer. Thank you so much for being here. Do
Speaker 1: you have any upcoming shows or any you want to plug? Um? No,
Speaker 1: I'm kind of taking a little bit of time off
Speaker 1: the road, but you can follow me on Twitter at
Speaker 1: Fortune Funny or Instagram at Fortune Feamster and watch the
Speaker 1: Mindy Project when it comes back in April April. Everything
Speaker 1: you're saying to me, I uh, okay, this is real
Speaker 1: down the line, This is real down the line. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna be at Hyenas in Dallas for tax Day, you guys, April.
Speaker 1: You see, I'm taking time off also nice. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: that's that's when I'm back on the road. Fantastic to
Speaker 1: be on the road in Seattle in March. Yeah, it's okay,
Speaker 1: that's before. Where are you gonna be playing? The Parlor?
Speaker 1: That's fun in in Bellevue. That's a nice club, nice room,
Speaker 1: it's a nice room. Rich there. They got a lot
Speaker 1: of yado. Yeah yeah, a lot of city out there.
Speaker 1: I start traveling with a mad woman in March, but
Speaker 1: I have I have a fun one night or at
Speaker 1: the Barrel House in San Francisco on Tuesday, February. Okay,
Speaker 1: you guys, coming out and Aaron Kfolly dot com is
Speaker 1: on my Tory art Marine. Looks like Myron dot com
Speaker 1: is not updated. Hey, okay, you guys, thanks so much
Speaker 1: for listening. We'll see you next Wednesday with the World's
Speaker 1: most Boring Bachelor but the world's most exciting podcast. Yes swoops,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, it's gonna get all up and get any
Speaker 1: feels so good. I just gotta wander to push you.
Speaker 1: When you read this rule, this rule, your word for
Speaker 1: your accept this rose into your bird now leaving nerdice
Speaker 1: to dot com