Speaker 1: If you're listening to this right now, that that means
Speaker 1: this podcast is now available on Audio Mac. It's a
Speaker 1: free music and podcast streaming out that lets you stream
Speaker 1: and download the hottest albums, mix tapes, songs, playlists, and
Speaker 1: podcast along with their own exclusive ship. Discover the best
Speaker 1: songs by browsing the trending page. Check out the library
Speaker 1: of carefully curated playlists, and there's one for every mood
Speaker 1: that you could have. Take your favorite songs and podcasts
Speaker 1: offline to save your data and listen wherever you are,
Speaker 1: the train, the plane. It's all there for you. Here
Speaker 1: to move music Forward. Available now on the App Store
Speaker 1: and Google Play. Enjoy the show. Hey everybody, this is
Speaker 1: Wheezy and today's episode is super fucking important for a
Speaker 1: few reasons. So I feel like every time I'm out
Speaker 1: and about, someone will tell me they know me and
Speaker 1: congratulate me, and they'll tell me they don't listen, especially
Speaker 1: like men, because they don't agree with what we talk about.
Speaker 1: And you know, you've actually had a guy like last
Speaker 1: night say to me at Max Fish, y'all be on
Speaker 1: that like feminist ship. I don't even you know, I
Speaker 1: don't be on that ship like that. So if you've
Speaker 1: maybe felt that way or you're confused about feminism, today's
Speaker 1: for you. Today's for breaking down whatever bullshit you thought
Speaker 1: feminism was. Feminism is the advocacy of women's rights on
Speaker 1: the basis of, you know, equality of the sexes. And
Speaker 1: it's not the idea that like TV and society has
Speaker 1: made where like bitches are hella butch or hating men
Speaker 1: or lifting up their skirts to show a bush like
Speaker 1: the White girls was doing on TV. I don't know
Speaker 1: if y'all saw that ship, but they were wilding. I
Speaker 1: don't have one of those. I don't actually have hair
Speaker 1: on my pussy as an act of feminism. But I
Speaker 1: am a feminist and all of those things don't define me.
Speaker 1: So I don't want you guys to think that that
Speaker 1: bullshit standard that you know has like propaganda has made
Speaker 1: around feminism is what we are, you know. So during
Speaker 1: this hour, we're gonna break some of those myths down
Speaker 1: and basically teach you how to make this world a
Speaker 1: better place. If you have a pussy, if you're friends
Speaker 1: with someone with a pussy, if you fuck pussy, and
Speaker 1: if you came out of one. So everybody, everybody, everybody
Speaker 1: everybody came out of pussy. Um, well that was a
Speaker 1: really nice prelude to the show. Wait, everyone didn't come
Speaker 1: out of pussy. I came out of stomach. Now that
Speaker 1: I thought about it, you're so annoying. Why do you
Speaker 1: fucking got it well out of well, if you wasn't
Speaker 1: a womb bitch, if you wasn't a womb listen that
Speaker 1: pussy got sucked and that's where I'm here. UM. So yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm excited about this week's episode. Guys. UM, once again,
Speaker 1: this is horrible decisions. I'm your girl, Mandy B. I'm wheezy,
Speaker 1: and we do UM have a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful guest today. UM.
Speaker 1: Before we get started, though, UM, I did want to
Speaker 1: just open up really, uh, just just shortly about what's
Speaker 1: been going on with me. Um, this is gonna be
Speaker 1: we I know we got a lot to go through. UM,
Speaker 1: but Um, as you guys saw on Instagram and it
Speaker 1: meant a lot to me. UM, I have been going
Speaker 1: through anxiety more than I have ever been. As you
Speaker 1: guys know, I'm quitting my job soon, and so I
Speaker 1: think like the closer that I get to leaving my job. Look,
Speaker 1: see I can't even talk about this, bro, It's so bad,
Speaker 1: It's really bad. Um but I didn't want to bring
Speaker 1: this on air because it meant a lot to me. Um.
Speaker 1: I made a post about my anxiety and what's been
Speaker 1: going on, and it's it's not only with my job,
Speaker 1: but even with my weight. I'm having your thing now.
Speaker 1: Um but I but I asked you guys to send
Speaker 1: me some books on how to deal with this. I've
Speaker 1: never had anxiety in my whole life. I've quit jobs
Speaker 1: like nothing. I always felt like I can get like somebody.
Speaker 1: I just always felt things would fall into place. And
Speaker 1: I don't know why now, at a space where I
Speaker 1: am in the best place of my life, why I
Speaker 1: have this much anxiety. People are scared to fail when
Speaker 1: they do, I'm so scared but of that, and I like,
Speaker 1: like I said, my way, I'm now wanting to lose more.
Speaker 1: Like I'm just having a lot of anxiety everything in
Speaker 1: my life. Um but I wrote a lot of books.
Speaker 1: I wrote, I wrote, I wrote to ask about books. Look,
Speaker 1: this is how like I'm so flustered, like I'm getting
Speaker 1: hot talking about this something kind trying not to cry.
Speaker 1: But wheezy, Um, I guess saw that I was requesting these,
Speaker 1: saw my post about my anxiety, and I got home
Speaker 1: yesterday to a book in my mailbox UM and it
Speaker 1: was The Four Agreements, which is a book that a
Speaker 1: lot of people said that I should read, UM and
Speaker 1: it was one that I was going to purchase. UM.
Speaker 1: And literally I went on Live and was like, which
Speaker 1: one of my friends did this? So I hit my homegirl, Jazz,
Speaker 1: I hit my mama, I hit everybody. I didn't think
Speaker 1: it was because we haven't been in a good space,
Speaker 1: but I called her yesterday after receiving it, UM, and
Speaker 1: it just really meant a lot, Like to receive that
Speaker 1: for any of you guys going through anxiety. If you
Speaker 1: guys have any UM advice or suggestions, they're gonna say,
Speaker 1: therapy be great. I think Mandy wants to anything else everything. UM.
Speaker 1: So I'm reading books. I'm doing that. And so the
Speaker 1: reason I got that book and like, right, so Mandy
Speaker 1: and I we were arguing this week. We're like just
Speaker 1: three weeks. Well we're trying to like figure out you know,
Speaker 1: we're both out to quit, so like delegating how this
Speaker 1: will work is and we're both really perfectionist, you know.
Speaker 1: I didn't even realize until my therapist said it to me.
Speaker 1: He's like, both of you have curated a tour alone.
Speaker 1: Like you're literally telling me your friends are checking people in,
Speaker 1: but you've sold out in all these cities twelve shows
Speaker 1: like and thirtainment bit. He's like, how can you not
Speaker 1: expect to feel so much ownership when it comes to
Speaker 1: now having a team. You let power go and you
Speaker 1: guys have held all your power and so now you're
Speaker 1: gonna bud heads because you both care about this brand
Speaker 1: so much. So like, you know, I really wanted to
Speaker 1: send the book because I feel like when I'm angry
Speaker 1: with my friends, I mean like like, if you call me,
Speaker 1: I'm here right and me and Manny may not be besties,
Speaker 1: but we still have this business and I don't want
Speaker 1: your head space to be fucked up or you'd be
Speaker 1: anxious about Like literally I call her crying and she
Speaker 1: was idea. Now I'm like, just I've been crying every
Speaker 1: day and I don't know why. Like I was literally
Speaker 1: fucking watching TV, which I was watching Real Housewives of
Speaker 1: All make and it's the first five minutes I'm just
Speaker 1: watching in my eyes are just getting are you pregnant.
Speaker 1: First off, a bitch can't even get dick right now, okay,
Speaker 1: because I keep missing my dick appointment. Look at I'm
Speaker 1: am I pregnant, don't you Darren? If I was on
Speaker 1: a watch voice that ship is coming out episode? Yeah, no,
Speaker 1: we got an episode coming up. But the thing is like, yeah, like,
Speaker 1: even when fighting, I think that you and I haven't
Speaker 1: done this because like we're so this is so much
Speaker 1: about our personalities and our chemistry, so it is hard
Speaker 1: to fight into an episode and to come out good.
Speaker 1: I'm like, Okay, well, what's a gesture to social body?
Speaker 1: Like I know that we're not agreeing on one thing
Speaker 1: right now, like professional ship, but like this relationship should
Speaker 1: still be okay. And that's what I'm like basically trying
Speaker 1: to do with the future of us when we argue,
Speaker 1: really make it just that workship, but not get angry
Speaker 1: with Mandy. You know what I'm saying. I'm mad about
Speaker 1: how Mandy wants something done, but I can't be mad
Speaker 1: at you. Like it's just we're disagreeing on the work project.
Speaker 1: I've done it my whole life with working right, So
Speaker 1: it's like, why do we get so personal? And I'm
Speaker 1: like really trying my best to like separate. I love
Speaker 1: that you're trying to separate that bitch. My therapist also
Speaker 1: so good because i'd be trying to be all business.
Speaker 1: I just wrote her an email on strictly business. She
Speaker 1: wrote me back forty paragraphs and everything started with I
Speaker 1: feel like I feel like and I'm like, man, but
Speaker 1: we're just trying to talk about business and you're bringing
Speaker 1: in our relationship. I just want to talk about business
Speaker 1: right now. But there is I feel like trying to
Speaker 1: find that lot. I like it. I'm taking it all out.
Speaker 1: Here's the thing, Like, I'm super emotional and I feel
Speaker 1: like Mandy. Okay, I had to be that person, But
Speaker 1: what are your signs? Girl? We didn't. We did a
Speaker 1: whole guy day, but the pisces I'm a libra. Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: why were you thinking in your head? No, No, I
Speaker 1: just wanted I just wanted to see because that that
Speaker 1: helped me a little bit. For me. I want her
Speaker 1: to understand because like, yeah, I want her business to work.
Speaker 1: But you have to remember, like, my feelings are super
Speaker 1: invested in a lot of this ship, right so to me,
Speaker 1: I'll be like give them ships out. But if my
Speaker 1: feelings aren't good with her, I can't do business. Like
Speaker 1: if I walk into the office and someone comes an
Speaker 1: attitude of me fucking done, it ruins everything. And see,
Speaker 1: to me, I've learned like we if we have a
Speaker 1: common goal at work. And I've played sports my whole
Speaker 1: life as well, so there's been people that I hate
Speaker 1: playing basketball with or I did the relay on track,
Speaker 1: and so there's all these relationships that I've had where
Speaker 1: my nigga once we have something to come to like,
Speaker 1: let's just talk about that, take your personal ship out
Speaker 1: of it. And I've always taken personal ship out of it.
Speaker 1: I just got a job and didn't have to interact.
Speaker 1: That's different. That's why I could have sex and still
Speaker 1: not become I've never had a job like this. Me
Speaker 1: and you, if we don't click, our ship doesn't work period.
Speaker 1: Like you because you being your feelings, I know you're
Speaker 1: coming to a bitch. Okay, let's talk about feminism. Are
Speaker 1: you Are you straight? Because I don't want to hit
Speaker 1: on you and make you feel uncomfortable, but you're beautiful Yea.
Speaker 1: Our guests, if you listen, I know you'll be listening
Speaker 1: to us. Y'all gotta watch this whole No, you're not
Speaker 1: a story. Okay, y'all, I'm not gonna restrain me like
Speaker 1: bell hooks right now. Okay. Like, so, we have a
Speaker 1: guest in the studio. Guys, her name is Mars. Can
Speaker 1: you go ahead and introduce yourself to our audience? Hi,
Speaker 1: Mars love Joy. Um, yeah, I think I'm I was
Speaker 1: thinking about this in the shower. I was like, they're
Speaker 1: gonna have me try to introduce myself about He asked me, like,
Speaker 1: who is she? And I'm like, yo, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I just know she's feminists flying, this is us feeding.
Speaker 1: Rihanna follows her, she said, we are. That's only what
Speaker 1: she said. I said, who is she? She's like, well,
Speaker 1: Rihanna follows her. So she's like what it is like,
Speaker 1: it's funny when you find someone who's like it ain't
Speaker 1: like you have millions of followers anything, right, but that
Speaker 1: like all these industry people follow and you're super chill
Speaker 1: and there's not like you're You're not a singer, you're
Speaker 1: not an actor. So you're right, Look, she does everything
Speaker 1: we don't know, So tell us what what do you
Speaker 1: do or why are you known? Because you do have
Speaker 1: a blue check? Right, no, chick, Okay, so what is
Speaker 1: it that you do? Um, I don't think they want
Speaker 1: me to have a blue check? Say that ship, but
Speaker 1: what are you gonna have one for a bit? That's
Speaker 1: the thing. Well I do. So I started when I
Speaker 1: graduated high school. I started doing music and I was
Speaker 1: like full for is doing like rapping singing. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: I had a little music like moment like open for Erica.
Speaker 1: That's not a little music, Okay, it was popping. But
Speaker 1: then I quickly realized, like I had to really now
Speaker 1: I was young. I was like eighteen nineteen, and like
Speaker 1: being that young around a whole bunch of men, grown
Speaker 1: men moving in this music industry for a long time,
Speaker 1: like trying to make me like a sex and bowl
Speaker 1: and I wasn't there at that, Like I was like
Speaker 1: super humble or like I wasn't gonna like left Eye
Speaker 1: Missy Elliott, you know, like I was on that so
Speaker 1: um so it just had to learn a lot through that.
Speaker 1: And but in that like I like all of my
Speaker 1: friends were making music, and I knew that eventually my
Speaker 1: friends were going to blow up and like be superstars
Speaker 1: like not not re read but Nicknaked, Um but so
Speaker 1: so that's how I started and I was acting and
Speaker 1: so a lot of people know me from that and
Speaker 1: then um, just like being in every fashion week. No, no,
Speaker 1: are you working for a magazine? Right? So my husband
Speaker 1: has Office magazine and like I help with that. But um,
Speaker 1: but yeah, so I've been and I grew up my
Speaker 1: the link like being like a child model and stuff
Speaker 1: like that. So I've been in this kind of industry
Speaker 1: and I think you know that's why, and that's I'm
Speaker 1: sorry the creative industry that you keepep going. But I'm
Speaker 1: also just really glad that you've kind of had that
Speaker 1: in in the industry because we're talking about feminism and
Speaker 1: being in the space where we're at now with the
Speaker 1: Me Too movement, Time's Up and all of that thing,
Speaker 1: um and all of the people in the industry coming
Speaker 1: out and saying how women are treated and what is
Speaker 1: expected of women um at these young ages from girl
Speaker 1: groups and all of that. So you kind of have
Speaker 1: an in in that. So I'm excited to kind of
Speaker 1: even touch on that. Um, do you want Yeah, I
Speaker 1: only have a few more questions. I want to know.
Speaker 1: I honestly would stand you and your man like for
Speaker 1: at least fucking when did you get married a year ago?
Speaker 1: We got married October teventeen. Damn, I've been fucking following
Speaker 1: you that long. Yo, y'all. Win was crazy. You had
Speaker 1: a cage on your face, and Ship, I was like, in,
Speaker 1: you know, he got the little year old look. You know,
Speaker 1: I stand for a little's way. So I wanted to discuss, like,
Speaker 1: so you met your husband, you seem very pro black.
Speaker 1: I am very pro black, Yeah, but I don't. I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't know you, right, So you seemed very pro
Speaker 1: black from your Instagram I'm watching and then I was like, oh, Ship,
Speaker 1: but your man's find the book. They get married, it's
Speaker 1: do pass wedding. Like, how has it been for you
Speaker 1: with interracial relationship? Like have you had one before? Not really?
Speaker 1: Like I like funked around with some white boys in
Speaker 1: the past before, but like not really um like Filipino
Speaker 1: Latino black like that. I never like had a real
Speaker 1: white man. So I kind of want to dig into
Speaker 1: not not dig into it too much. But so I
Speaker 1: had this um. I was a part of this conversation
Speaker 1: on the grapevine UM, and it was about kind of
Speaker 1: people who are pro black, like the Childish Gambino and
Speaker 1: all these people, and then you are all the time
Speaker 1: you are with someone who's white. Does like, how do
Speaker 1: how does that work? Like I can't imagine myself as
Speaker 1: being someone who's pro black and I'm all here from
Speaker 1: my kings, and then I marry a white man, um,
Speaker 1: And I think the same with Childish Game, you know,
Speaker 1: you do everything for the black community, the same with
Speaker 1: um who's Jordan Peel. All of these people are so
Speaker 1: pro black, and then you're with a white woman and
Speaker 1: in your case, like, how does that work? And why?
Speaker 1: I think? I think, first of all, like it's transparency.
Speaker 1: I think, you know, like for me, like I'm not
Speaker 1: trying to hide anything, you know, and I didn't like
Speaker 1: even Virgil, you know, like there's these men who like
Speaker 1: these black men who like it kind of seems like
Speaker 1: they're like hiding their partners in a sense, their white partners.
Speaker 1: And so that's one thing. But also like as a
Speaker 1: black woman, just my history and like an our history
Speaker 1: of like being like you know, even going back from
Speaker 1: ancestry and like you know, being brought here to this
Speaker 1: country and like being told what we can can't do
Speaker 1: and how we can use our bodies and when we
Speaker 1: can use our bodies and all of and just like
Speaker 1: being in that space like for a black woman, like
Speaker 1: I feel like I can do whatever the funk I
Speaker 1: want to do and like and whoever I love and
Speaker 1: whoever I choose to love and whoever I'm with like that,
Speaker 1: Like now y'all are giving my husband power like, oh,
Speaker 1: she can't be pro black because of this person, and
Speaker 1: like and so like, and I feel like damn, like
Speaker 1: I here, I am doing work in my community. Here,
Speaker 1: I am being transparent. Here, I am speaking about all
Speaker 1: of these things. Yet y'all are based in me off
Speaker 1: of who I'm with, that to me is not pro black.
Speaker 1: So so I've had a lot of time to think
Speaker 1: about those things. But also like I never thought I
Speaker 1: was gonna like be with a white man like I
Speaker 1: always I always and I always like the way I
Speaker 1: envisioned my children, like my mom and dad are black,
Speaker 1: like like the way I envisioned my children are. You know,
Speaker 1: I was gonna have a little brown baby like so
Speaker 1: like that, you know. But also I'm I was in
Speaker 1: the space like and it's so crazy to be in
Speaker 1: the engine engine room because like before I met my husband,
Speaker 1: I was dating Prodigy and like this was his main
Speaker 1: this is where he works out of was Um and
Speaker 1: so like I was, I just I was in the
Speaker 1: space where like you know, I've I've tried, like I've
Speaker 1: had these like dated women, dated men, like different races,
Speaker 1: Like I've never even been that type of person to
Speaker 1: like really trip on like on what like you could
Speaker 1: line all my people up like their sex, like their
Speaker 1: gender is different, they look different, Like it's all like that,
Speaker 1: do you guys dentify his buying Caeer my home girl
Speaker 1: just says, all my niggas like they put two point oh,
Speaker 1: three point oh, they're like all these niggas are brothers.
Speaker 1: Like all the guys I did would look alike, Like
Speaker 1: I have a type so here that you're able to
Speaker 1: like say like listening to type, though I don't think
Speaker 1: I don't think so either. I mean I think when
Speaker 1: it's a fetish, like you know, that's the bad thing.
Speaker 1: But I mean that I don't have a type of
Speaker 1: well my type really color, but they kind of are
Speaker 1: the same. Like creative dudes. I like tall dudes. I
Speaker 1: like tattoos. I like folk niggas. I love when they're
Speaker 1: like yo, my feministion to ah, that's always been like
Speaker 1: white or black, they're always kind of the same. You know,
Speaker 1: my name is different. I feel like, but I feel
Speaker 1: like when it becomes toxic to you and you're just
Speaker 1: like you're just resisting against it, kind of like that
Speaker 1: quote that you brought up, you know, like pretending to
Speaker 1: be happy in these spaces, like I think I was
Speaker 1: at a time I had my best one of my
Speaker 1: best closest friends have passed away, and then like I
Speaker 1: was dating Simon and I was like, nah, I'm not
Speaker 1: doing anything, like my whole life just changed. But he
Speaker 1: was like, no, I'm gonna stick around. And I think
Speaker 1: like being able to receive love like whenever it comes,
Speaker 1: however it comes, I think that is really important. And
Speaker 1: I think you know a lot of people kind of
Speaker 1: like you said, like you have this idea of what
Speaker 1: what love looks like and in your mind, and if
Speaker 1: it doesn't pan out like that, if you keep on
Speaker 1: trying to force it to be like that, then you're
Speaker 1: not going to be happy. I really like that what
Speaker 1: you just said, because someone said to me once like
Speaker 1: recently with dating two people, right, troublesque kind of relationship
Speaker 1: going on and she was like, well, if it doesn't
Speaker 1: work out, like then maybe a proof that troubles aren't successful.
Speaker 1: And I was like, what, Like, I've had love, I've
Speaker 1: had broken up with people, and I considered them successful relationships.
Speaker 1: Not every ending. I've had successful jobs that I've ended,
Speaker 1: you know, like not every ending is means that it failed,
Speaker 1: you know, Like I am happy with the love I'm
Speaker 1: receiving right now if it ends up growing into something cool.
Speaker 1: If it doesn't cool, like I'm really a fan of leaving,
Speaker 1: Like things just happen where they those too, And what
Speaker 1: you were saying about people have an idea of marriage.
Speaker 1: I'm curious to know because you were like I told him,
Speaker 1: Nah was it casual? Like how did it start? How
Speaker 1: did I was dating start? Yeah? Like do you feel
Speaker 1: like you knew when you knew? I was like this
Speaker 1: will be a little summer fling or something like I
Speaker 1: was not. I wasn't looking for and we are we
Speaker 1: are believe it's real. So but you know I had
Speaker 1: like I was like I was dating Prodigy and like
Speaker 1: we had a great like we were friends before and
Speaker 1: we had a great like it was it was one
Speaker 1: of those like really fiery passionate, this is amazing. But
Speaker 1: then we crashed and burn type relationship, you know, And
Speaker 1: so I was coming off of that um. Two thousand
Speaker 1: sixteen like was a horrible year for me personally, Like
Speaker 1: I lost a lot of people, and my grandfather died,
Speaker 1: one of my best friends died. Like, so I was
Speaker 1: in this space where I was like, funk everybody every same.
Speaker 1: A year later, we'd so we start like we pretty
Speaker 1: much like we're like, okay, we're boyfriend and girlfriend now.
Speaker 1: October two thousand and sixteen, he proposed. April two thousand seven,
Speaker 1: I got pregnant. I got I got pregnant like into August,
Speaker 1: and then that October we got married. And then that
Speaker 1: next April we had the baby. Wow, happens that fast?
Speaker 1: Where my niggat I falling? You've been you've been telling
Speaker 1: Bobby No, oh no that's gonna stay. I'm sorry. I
Speaker 1: don't actually have a Bobby at all, Like I don't
Speaker 1: have none of what I'm saying. By no, that's what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. I have no white men even I mean
Speaker 1: not even mixed with white. Like weally met at a party,
Speaker 1: Like we met at one of his party. Is that
Speaker 1: my like my black homeboy invited, like you know, so
Speaker 1: it was I'm going that you got a very good
Speaker 1: like if no one's ever been a white guy, like
Speaker 1: he's like the perfect looking one like Taddy. You know,
Speaker 1: he got the short haircuse, so he's like for nothing.
Speaker 1: He's Danish and I was gonna says he's very euro
Speaker 1: and like, I'm not like I know my history and
Speaker 1: I'm not like excusing anything. But like white Americans, it's different,
Speaker 1: like the way he say this is it's totally different.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I'm out of this slope white American news.
Speaker 1: And this is the funny thing when people come for me,
Speaker 1: right and they'd be like, I can't believe you being
Speaker 1: these white boys. I'm like, I'm not sucking these white boys.
Speaker 1: I'm really not. I'm just not. I can't do it.
Speaker 1: So we're actually gonna go a little bit like let's
Speaker 1: do the Vanilaia after because the kink of the week
Speaker 1: that we actually found has to do with this type
Speaker 1: of ship, this inter racial ship. Um we found. It's
Speaker 1: called Queen of Spades. So for all you white women listening, listen,
Speaker 1: twenty seven of you, um technically, um, Queen of Spades
Speaker 1: is a married white woman that enjoys sex with multiple,
Speaker 1: two or more well hung black males at a time
Speaker 1: on a frequent basis. The woman is typically a swinger
Speaker 1: and engages in sex with the permission of her husband.
Speaker 1: The wife may maintain one or more steady lovers and
Speaker 1: referred to them as her boyfriend, her bull, or that
Speaker 1: she is black owned. Frequently, the husband and wife will
Speaker 1: film the wife's escapades for future enjoyment. So we watched
Speaker 1: like it will be like BBC cup holding. I don't
Speaker 1: mean we watched. I'm just saying, like, you know when
Speaker 1: we know about it like that, right, we know about
Speaker 1: cup holding. But I have never heard of this queen
Speaker 1: and people tattooed on the brow like they have if
Speaker 1: you the space tattoo type in Queen of Spades, there's
Speaker 1: a spacece tattoo on this heard that. I've never heard
Speaker 1: this ship. It's on their leg, it's on their pussy,
Speaker 1: like it's somewhere. So I was reading this hilarious thread
Speaker 1: on Reddit about the funniest porn comments, and one of
Speaker 1: them had to do with the Queen of Space hat
Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh, what is that? And so then
Speaker 1: I googled it, and that's when I felt this ship
Speaker 1: that is crazy. I'm just gonna saute. That made a
Speaker 1: lot of calm when I first started the show, and
Speaker 1: then like, you guys are gonna run out of talk
Speaker 1: about there's no way. Literally half way through the hundreds
Speaker 1: right now, and we're still like, I sent her video,
Speaker 1: We're gonna do it on another episode, but I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna lie. That's why I went to try to find
Speaker 1: another king, because I was like, this is too soft
Speaker 1: for us to do the kink that I sent you today.
Speaker 1: I was like, we're not gonna bring this up in
Speaker 1: the middle, but it's a I'll send you the video.
Speaker 1: I'll send you the video. It's a little while, um,
Speaker 1: but no. So when she sent me the Queen of
Speaker 1: Space thing, I was like, here's my question to you, though,
Speaker 1: because we've talked about this often, do you feel like
Speaker 1: it's a fetishism of the lost on the by the
Speaker 1: husband or the wife or both both. Bro, that's disgusting.
Speaker 1: Don't clean spain not here. Niggas know that you're like,
Speaker 1: you're I mean, you're king shaming. I'm king shaming. When
Speaker 1: it comes into race play, I think that sho is discussed,
Speaker 1: So what's crazy is when so I went two years
Speaker 1: ago to hedonism. It's a it's a resort in Jamaica,
Speaker 1: and I talked about I've mentioned this before. There was
Speaker 1: a piano night, so on the piano, everyone like sits
Speaker 1: around the piano and the guy on the piano just
Speaker 1: starts freestyling these songs about the people who are in
Speaker 1: the audience and it's really fun. It's sucking funny a ship.
Speaker 1: And so he asked questions to the different couples sitting around,
Speaker 1: and there was this older couple. It was a white
Speaker 1: man and a white woman, and so she he asks
Speaker 1: for the purse to go and see what's in her
Speaker 1: little clutch. In her clutch, there's condoms. So they weren't magnums,
Speaker 1: they were just like regular condoms. And so the piano
Speaker 1: guy was like, oh, she must not like goes to
Speaker 1: talk about the size of him, and the husband immediately said, oh,
Speaker 1: those condoms aren't for me, there for her. And they
Speaker 1: literally go into a conversation saying, we're in Jamaica, we
Speaker 1: know what we're looking for. They wanted a black guy
Speaker 1: like to join the room with them, and me and
Speaker 1: my friends looked at each other like and he said
Speaker 1: it so confidently in front of all these other couples,
Speaker 1: but was like, oh, no, these condoms are for her,
Speaker 1: and it's because we're in Jamaica. What do you think
Speaker 1: we're looking for? And they literally came to Jamaica for
Speaker 1: black men to fuck his his wife. And it was
Speaker 1: just like like she said, and they said all open,
Speaker 1: and she was like, yeah, so if anyone and we
Speaker 1: all just looked at them, like me and my friends
Speaker 1: looked at each other like this is kind of weird.
Speaker 1: Like they're literally saying they're here to search for a
Speaker 1: black man dingo. And I was just like and they
Speaker 1: said it just so confident. Really piss me off. That's
Speaker 1: pretty crazy. That's why I'm more than you know. You
Speaker 1: hate when I say BBC, but it's not like I
Speaker 1: know you like niggas, but like the BBC ship I've
Speaker 1: never seen really it was like black people to get like,
Speaker 1: I don't know, I do like big black cocks, so
Speaker 1: like I don't like little black cocks. I like the
Speaker 1: big ones. I'm just saying, not all black cocks are.
Speaker 1: You don't even say I don't. That's why you just
Speaker 1: bring it up, Okay, so that DoD I do want
Speaker 1: to do you know that dicks are big? Say it
Speaker 1: like that? Just do we know dicks are big when
Speaker 1: we say it like that? Because like we say it
Speaker 1: in our friends are what I mean, like, did you
Speaker 1: last night? But she had dude? Like That's when you
Speaker 1: know it was like good? So if you do, it's
Speaker 1: not preferred to it better than the best. If there
Speaker 1: is not, if there's a scene, k at it at
Speaker 1: the end and they can't say that, they can't say
Speaker 1: due holy fuck. See look you already know what they
Speaker 1: call it. They got a cock cock. It doesn't once
Speaker 1: O vanilla ship this week? So are vanilla ship For
Speaker 1: those of you who don't know, Um is our sex
Speaker 1: in the news conversation? Just so y'all know we'd be
Speaker 1: doing research or whatever, but want you all to know
Speaker 1: that sex is everywhere around us, um, whether it's someone
Speaker 1: you know we got locked up, or even if we
Speaker 1: dig into the politics of it. I'm so sorry I
Speaker 1: said this isn't attachedment so you can't click on the link.
Speaker 1: That's why I said bitch was the goddamn take it
Speaker 1: a week. Look, see this is what happens when she
Speaker 1: produces nothing Oh my god, stop, don't want the press. Okay.
Speaker 1: So I've been like writing a lot, which is why
Speaker 1: I'm using my computer, and I just didn't realize that,
Speaker 1: like I couldn't click on it from here. Yeah. Do
Speaker 1: you see why our outlines are like so long? Now
Speaker 1: you know I'll be paying spy. This is great. Okay.
Speaker 1: So I found this article mainly because I heard this
Speaker 1: rumor that this dude sued this chick to get his
Speaker 1: money back from like not splitting a date, and it
Speaker 1: was real. Wait wait, wait wait, he's a Texas man's
Speaker 1: Texas sue's a woman for texting during the first date
Speaker 1: and explains his lawsuit. Tuesday afternoon, there is big news
Speaker 1: about a small lawsuit. Brandon Vezmar filed a suit against
Speaker 1: a woman who he met on Bumble, alleging she had
Speaker 1: text during the date and she owed him the ticket
Speaker 1: price of seventeen thirty one Guardians of the Galaxy. No,
Speaker 1: he's psycho. Um. Yeah. The story has largely been treated
Speaker 1: as a quirky case of a person attempting to correct
Speaker 1: bad behavior through unusual means. He said. The woman said
Speaker 1: at a very brief day with Brandon that I chose
Speaker 1: to end prematurely. His behavior made me extremely uncomfortable, and
Speaker 1: I felt I needed to remove myself from the situation,
Speaker 1: from my own safety. He had escalated the situation and
Speaker 1: far past what any mentally healthy person would. I feel sorry.
Speaker 1: I hurt his feelings bad enough that he needed to
Speaker 1: commit so much time and effort into seeking revenge. He
Speaker 1: can move past this. But small seventeen dollars right? But no,
Speaker 1: what was? But that's no for sure? But not only that,
Speaker 1: Like what was? How much does cork fees? Calls for that?
Speaker 1: Like you're going above the seventeen dollars for corfees. I
Speaker 1: don't know do taxes and we'd be having a call
Speaker 1: for notice. Isn't ship girl do taxes? Girl? I do
Speaker 1: tex I do taxes for hedge funds, And so we
Speaker 1: get like notices from different states. I'm on the state
Speaker 1: and local side, and so we'll get a notice for
Speaker 1: likes and seventeen cents and the client will have us
Speaker 1: call for it, and I'm like, our chargeable hours are
Speaker 1: like two hundred an hour just for an account. So
Speaker 1: it's just like you're spending two hundred an hour for
Speaker 1: me to call a state about notice. Bitch? If you
Speaker 1: don't just pay that ship. So for him to just
Speaker 1: not take a god damn seventeen dollar loss. First of all,
Speaker 1: didn't die, he said, honestly, he describes it as a
Speaker 1: date from hell. He said that he didn't think his
Speaker 1: companion had a it could be bad time. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I didn't know that this is a bad date for her.
Speaker 1: I think that this is probably a really great date
Speaker 1: for her. I was really nice. She seemed to be
Speaker 1: having a great time until the point where I asked
Speaker 1: her stopped texting, I bought her pizza, drove her car.
Speaker 1: I thought this was fun and nice day. He drove.
Speaker 1: I don't know if that's what it says, drove her car.
Speaker 1: I don't know why. Maybe it's mistyped. Um, this was
Speaker 1: a nice, fun date. I wasn't actually interested in seeing
Speaker 1: her again very early on, but she was nice and
Speaker 1: the conversation was like, I feel comfortable. Can you can
Speaker 1: to continue the date. I don't think this was a
Speaker 1: bad experience for her. I think this was a bad
Speaker 1: experience for me. I think what's a bad experience for
Speaker 1: her at this point is her being responsible for her behavior. Um,
Speaker 1: she's saying that basically it was yeah, inappropriate for her
Speaker 1: to text during the movie. So I'm not gonna lie
Speaker 1: during a movie during a movie. But so here's the
Speaker 1: thing with this that some money he want to be
Speaker 1: he said, He said that, I mean it is it
Speaker 1: is like, you don't text during a movie, which I
Speaker 1: have a business. I will on a date on the day,
Speaker 1: I will. No, I don't give a funk. I don't
Speaker 1: agree with him. But like, if you want a movie,
Speaker 1: like what if the movie was bad, you saw Guards
Speaker 1: of the Galaxy, I probably would text during that too.
Speaker 1: I don't know what the funk that is, but it
Speaker 1: sounds like I'm gonna text daring. Then let's go to
Speaker 1: a movie that we both like that we're not gonna
Speaker 1: be texting that Honestly, I am just like really surprised
Speaker 1: that you can't understand why texting would be bad during
Speaker 1: a date. But that's so during a date. That's like
Speaker 1: if we're having a conversation, if we're having a conversation
Speaker 1: over dinner and we're talking and then I look on
Speaker 1: my that is rude. But if we're in a movie,
Speaker 1: we're watching the screen, we're not talking. I'm going to Mitch,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna let me check my email because the bitch
Speaker 1: is busy there though. Yeah, but what's going on, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna take a little break. I'm good interrupting you with
Speaker 1: an important message from our sponsor today, True and Company,
Speaker 1: the amazing fucking braun Mandy and I have been telling
Speaker 1: you about. Actually I'm wearing it in one of my
Speaker 1: new pictures on Instagram with like a little black bra,
Speaker 1: so I'll be roll with you. I'm not a BRA fan,
Speaker 1: but this ship is so light I just can't really
Speaker 1: tell I have it on. I people thought it was
Speaker 1: like a sports bra almost because of the way it
Speaker 1: fit me, the material and tit's liking juicy, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. You won't believe how good it looks. Seriously,
Speaker 1: it's like buttery soft fabric. It smooths you out in
Speaker 1: all the right places. And what's game changing is that
Speaker 1: it comes in seventy wire free options. I was wearing
Speaker 1: um a v neck one in black, but honestly, you'll
Speaker 1: want them all. They come in scoop neck, convertible straps,
Speaker 1: all that ship. Um. They've sold over half a million
Speaker 1: of the original True Brady bras. I would love for
Speaker 1: you guys to try it and tell me what you think.
Speaker 1: You can use our code horrible say go online true
Speaker 1: end code dot com slash horrible. Enter our code for
Speaker 1: off free and easy returns. You're gonna love it. Send
Speaker 1: us a picture of your TITTI is it so? As
Speaker 1: we've said UM a lot in the beginning, we are
Speaker 1: going to get into kind of feminism and what it means, um,
Speaker 1: if you guys have not checked it out. I was
Speaker 1: recently on the red Pill podcast with Van Leathan and
Speaker 1: he got into kind of a conversation about patriarchy, feminism, UM,
Speaker 1: and being courted, and I like did a deep dive
Speaker 1: into why I feel like I can still be feminists
Speaker 1: um and expect a guy to pay for things. UM.
Speaker 1: I had one thing that I think you didn't say
Speaker 1: what you said. I still believe in the patriarchy a
Speaker 1: little bit, and I think the confusion with that is
Speaker 1: being courted is not a patriarchal thing. I've been with
Speaker 1: women and they've courted me, and I've courted women like
Speaker 1: right and like taking charge of being assertive, we gotta
Speaker 1: break like that's not patriarchal thing thing, right, Like you
Speaker 1: just enjoy someone doing those things for you, but that
Speaker 1: doesn't necessarily mean that you believe in the patriarchy. So
Speaker 1: I think that's a very big confusion with that. So
Speaker 1: but it's not because I still do because I still believe,
Speaker 1: which is odd and I know it can go both ways.
Speaker 1: But if I expect certain roles from a man, such
Speaker 1: as paying the bills, such as being the providers, such
Speaker 1: as all of the things that I talked about, I
Speaker 1: still also believe that as a woman, I want to
Speaker 1: I still want to do the woman roles, I guess,
Speaker 1: the female gender roles of cleaning of um, doing the dishes,
Speaker 1: and and being kind of submissive to my man in
Speaker 1: those aspects of the house because I expect for him
Speaker 1: to be the man of the house. So I still
Speaker 1: kind of do feel like as a woman, even though
Speaker 1: I'm feminist, even though I'm independent, even though I have
Speaker 1: all my own money and blah blah blah blah, I
Speaker 1: still believe there are certain roles that as a woman
Speaker 1: I want to do. And that's why we kind of
Speaker 1: got into the argument. We also like your choice, But yeah,
Speaker 1: I do think Um, for me, I don't believe in
Speaker 1: that the patriarchy should stay. I think that it's really
Speaker 1: sucked us over with work, Like I mean, how many
Speaker 1: times are we walk in aucking office building and you
Speaker 1: count the women in the room, or even when I
Speaker 1: get hired and I'm like, oh, it's a girl here.
Speaker 1: Like the patriarch has really fucked us up, not only
Speaker 1: like for our personal money, but like just a livelihood
Speaker 1: and sanctity of our bodies with you know, them making
Speaker 1: decisions over us. So that's why I feel like I
Speaker 1: can't say I really believe in it anymore, but I
Speaker 1: know that I do appreciate a masculine energy, right, So
Speaker 1: whether that means being assertive and them doing certain things
Speaker 1: for me, possibly, but I don't want to use those
Speaker 1: words because I feel like it means they have a
Speaker 1: greater meaning. I don't know what are you thinking when
Speaker 1: you're listening to this, um, I think I think you're
Speaker 1: like that's your valid and wanting feeling like wanting to
Speaker 1: have a man do certain things. I think, like you said,
Speaker 1: have feminism, like you choose your own way. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: really like I personally, like I don't say I wouldn't
Speaker 1: say I'm a feminist. I like the like the term
Speaker 1: woman is just because like feminism has like especially like
Speaker 1: because it's like really started with white women, like the whole,
Speaker 1: and like it's excluded a lot of black women, a
Speaker 1: lot of trans women. So like when I think of feminism,
Speaker 1: I know what's changing and is becoming a lot more inclusive,
Speaker 1: and there's so many different sectors of feminism, but like,
Speaker 1: I don't know. We talked about that with Jamila Lemieux.
Speaker 1: She's really big on feminism, and that was actually one
Speaker 1: of the conversations we had, like how can you view feminism? Um?
Speaker 1: And both of them, Um, we see and Jimmy Love
Speaker 1: both differentiated between white feminism and black feminism. But to me,
Speaker 1: the whole idea of feminism is we're all women still,
Speaker 1: So I guess womanism is more so inclusive of you
Speaker 1: feel like everyone. I like that work. I think there's
Speaker 1: like a main point that I would like to just
Speaker 1: make a kind of ended. There's no men here to
Speaker 1: like sit and bitch about it, but there I feel
Speaker 1: like men always want to throw down our throats that
Speaker 1: we don't want to split bills. Oh you feminine that
Speaker 1: I wanted, and so here's my issue with that. We
Speaker 1: already are making seventy eight cents to the dollar, And
Speaker 1: that was my argument. I want to say this one
Speaker 1: thing to just kind of piece it in and maybe
Speaker 1: take men and women out of it. If I go
Speaker 1: out with one of my friends that I make more money,
Speaker 1: then now I'm generally paying for more of our drinks.
Speaker 1: I have always across the board expected someone that's making
Speaker 1: more to spend more. And I'll tell you where. We
Speaker 1: also see it when I was taking people on lunches
Speaker 1: and then I would go to lunches with um, let's say,
Speaker 1: a boss or something like that. Literally, in the guidelines
Speaker 1: for UM putting in my UM, what am I saying?
Speaker 1: The word when you pay? What's it called? When you
Speaker 1: put in your expenses my expenseer for it, it would
Speaker 1: say the senior person must pay, right. So I've always
Speaker 1: just noticed I felt like if a man is making more,
Speaker 1: it does kind of make sense for them to pay. Why,
Speaker 1: I mean, why have me shell out when I'm still growing?
Speaker 1: And then actually like, and that was probably the only
Speaker 1: part of the conversation, Fan was like, I've never heard
Speaker 1: it set like that, but that's what I said. I said,
Speaker 1: as as women, even though we do have the right
Speaker 1: to work now and the right to vote, and you know,
Speaker 1: we're now our rights of our bodies are being taken away,
Speaker 1: but we there has been a lot of rights given
Speaker 1: to women at the same breath. In the same breath,
Speaker 1: we're not given the same exact opportunities because we are
Speaker 1: paid less, specifically as black women. So as black women,
Speaker 1: we are like damn near at the bottom girl with
Speaker 1: the with the at the bottom of the totem pole
Speaker 1: as far as the gender pay gap, and then of
Speaker 1: course when you add the race of us being black
Speaker 1: women were paid even less. So it's just like to me,
Speaker 1: we're sitting here at the very bottom. And so if
Speaker 1: I'm given the opportunity to make less than you, I'm
Speaker 1: you know, I'm already put at the bottom, Like how
Speaker 1: can you sit here and expect me? And that's the thing,
Speaker 1: it's just like recognizing that. And I'll be honest. I
Speaker 1: am the last person I dated seriously as Jeeves, and
Speaker 1: he didn't make as much money as I made, And
Speaker 1: I did find myself wanting to pay for things so
Speaker 1: that I could do him like frankly, like I didn't
Speaker 1: want to make him feel uncomfortable if it wasn't in
Speaker 1: his that's cute, that's broke. Next, I mean it happened
Speaker 1: to me. I don't I don't want to date. The
Speaker 1: negative makes less to me. But I didn't even hold you.
Speaker 1: I went on, I went to the movies. We got
Speaker 1: Damn fell Embay and I just texting the hoel no no, no,
Speaker 1: no I wanted. But we got an uber coming back
Speaker 1: to my house and it was only seven dollar uber
Speaker 1: and I was like, you lucky because I would never
Speaker 1: pay the scot Damn with anybody else, but it's seven dollars.
Speaker 1: And I literally and I even told him, like, we're
Speaker 1: going to the movies, You're paying for my candy. I
Speaker 1: don't care if it's if it's a twenty dollar box,
Speaker 1: like we're on a date like and he makes a
Speaker 1: lot less to me. He caught me a millionaire the
Speaker 1: whole time. And I was like, so, I mean I
Speaker 1: dated this dude like I would say pretty. We hung
Speaker 1: out like four times a week, We went on vacation together,
Speaker 1: like I was dating him for about six months, like
Speaker 1: quite a bit of time. And there were things that
Speaker 1: I wanted to do and include him in. And I
Speaker 1: knew he liked to take me on dates, like he
Speaker 1: totally understod of that about me. So if I knew
Speaker 1: he couldn't afford them, and I wanted him to come
Speaker 1: with me fucking not paid for it. Now, like was
Speaker 1: it ideal? And I way more happy now than I'm
Speaker 1: with someone that can do all of that. Yeah, but still,
Speaker 1: what are what are your thoughts? What are your thoughts
Speaker 1: on kind of the splitting bill conversation, the courting conversation
Speaker 1: but yet still wanting to be a womanist and own
Speaker 1: own your independence and those things like is there is
Speaker 1: it kind of a hypocritical line of it, because I
Speaker 1: know that's that's what I've read in a lot of
Speaker 1: the comments that I was being a hypocrite to saying
Speaker 1: I was feminist but yet still expected the patriarchy and
Speaker 1: gender roles, Like what are your thoughts on that? As
Speaker 1: someone who is for women and you know, moving forward
Speaker 1: in that, I think, I mean, I'm always the person
Speaker 1: who's like it's probably a problem, but I'm the one
Speaker 1: who always wants to pay, like I'm always gonna like no,
Speaker 1: I got it, just like I feel like that's who
Speaker 1: I am again, and I do and I don't pride
Speaker 1: thing and might it might be a pride thing, I
Speaker 1: don't know, but it's that's not to say, like you know,
Speaker 1: like you can't get a trick, like you can't get
Speaker 1: somebody to trick on you or to like, you know,
Speaker 1: spend money on you or something like that. But like
Speaker 1: for me, like if we're going out to eat, like
Speaker 1: I'm I don't know, I guess I don't want some
Speaker 1: not maybe less than a date situation, but like friends
Speaker 1: or whatever, Like I don't want somebody trying to like
Speaker 1: having to hang something over my head like oh I
Speaker 1: paid for you, or like you know how petty people are,
Speaker 1: Like so, I mean it's dates, I don't feel that way,
Speaker 1: but with friendships sometimes I do, like and it's not
Speaker 1: that I've ever felt like a friend would do that
Speaker 1: to me, but I want to make sure that like
Speaker 1: I pull my weight and then even to sit with
Speaker 1: friends that I may be doing financially better than now
Speaker 1: got to. I don't conversation. To bring it to friends
Speaker 1: is completely like friends. Okay, all right, so dates and
Speaker 1: saying it's dates and if you're being with someone like yeah,
Speaker 1: has friends. But here's the thing we relate relating it
Speaker 1: to dates, I mean to friendships. I think is the
Speaker 1: point there because we see what happens in the dynamic
Speaker 1: when someone is making more or who's treating who. For example,
Speaker 1: why am I splitting a bill with you when you
Speaker 1: invited me out on a date? Yeah, that doesn't make sense.
Speaker 1: No period, if you wanted to take me. When I
Speaker 1: tell my homegirls, bitch come out with me tonight, blah
Speaker 1: blah blah blah blah, and they come out the house
Speaker 1: to get ready with me, I'm not gonna front. I
Speaker 1: get their drink. Like I invited you. Now, I we
Speaker 1: make this decision together. Like, but when I decision to
Speaker 1: invite someone anywhere, I do that. Period. If I invite
Speaker 1: you to my home and we're gonna eat, I think
Speaker 1: it only makes sense that I paid for the food
Speaker 1: because I invited you here, I'm hosting you, Well that
Speaker 1: makes sense. But if I invite anybody to do anything like,
Speaker 1: I think it's I don't know. For me, I guess
Speaker 1: I really haven't been on that updated and like been
Speaker 1: on a lot of days, but like for the most part,
Speaker 1: it's kind of like it's by actually, like the first
Speaker 1: day is kind of like, yeah, you're gonna pay. I
Speaker 1: think that's a little insinuating, And if it becomes an issue,
Speaker 1: like I might just pay it and whatever. But then
Speaker 1: I'm like, I know how that. I don't know how
Speaker 1: that relationship you what. Like I'm saying like if if
Speaker 1: I was put in a situation or his date and
Speaker 1: there was a date and he was like, whoa do
Speaker 1: you want to split it? Or like the exactly if
Speaker 1: it's like that, then I put my card down less
Speaker 1: like that's it, and now when I'll never see them
Speaker 1: again exactly, and now I know where that's not exactly
Speaker 1: I think. And I want to explain this one thing
Speaker 1: because when it happened to me, I was confused member
Speaker 1: with the Asian dude I went and I was like,
Speaker 1: what the fund is this? And it was really that
Speaker 1: I just didn't find him to be generous or giving enough,
Speaker 1: and I didn't like it exactly cause I knew he
Speaker 1: had money exactly. That's the thing that's a big But
Speaker 1: there's a difference between paying for a date because you're
Speaker 1: genuinely not interested. Because I've always said, if I'm on
Speaker 1: a date and I'm just having a good time and
Speaker 1: I don't like the nigga, a free meal isn't worth it.
Speaker 1: So I'll pay my mill and be like nice to
Speaker 1: meet you, thanks, and then that's where we did that.
Speaker 1: But to see but to just pay it just because
Speaker 1: you're not into I don't understand, Like, did he ask
Speaker 1: you to split the bill? What? I don't understand your
Speaker 1: story that you just said with the Asian I thought
Speaker 1: I thought I had talked talked about on the podcast.
Speaker 1: Maybe it was only on my Instagram. So I went
Speaker 1: out with this Asian dud. Remember I was into him, Like,
Speaker 1: we went on a few dates, and when the bill came,
Speaker 1: he would ask for two see no, no, because and
Speaker 1: we could both be like, even if you have five
Speaker 1: dollars in your pocket, I have five dollars in my pocket, Like,
Speaker 1: let's figure it out. Actually, the first day we went
Speaker 1: on bad but I'm talking about being generated. It was
Speaker 1: up here for like ten minutes, and then I realized
Speaker 1: he wanted to split the bill. So then what the
Speaker 1: check was? Just you went on a second date, even
Speaker 1: though that happened on the Honestly, I was really the
Speaker 1: date was that good? Bro? No? I was like, that
Speaker 1: would negate the entire days? What happened this second date?
Speaker 1: I brought it up right now, bro. He invited me
Speaker 1: out and bring it up as soon as y'all left.
Speaker 1: I didn't know what to do, but I knew I
Speaker 1: really wanted, like I was really into it, Like I
Speaker 1: literally was in the bathroom, touched my homegrow about how
Speaker 1: great it was going. So here's what happens. I go
Speaker 1: to work the next day. I'm talking to everybody about
Speaker 1: it and they're like, Yo, this is crazy. Now he,
Speaker 1: for one, I could bet my life on it. I
Speaker 1: know he has money. His work is I don't want
Speaker 1: to say it because anyway, he's a creative. There's evidence
Speaker 1: that he's got money. So this was very strange because
Speaker 1: I knew it was I'm like, is he not that
Speaker 1: into me? Maybe this was friendly? So when we went
Speaker 1: on the second day, he invited me off for drinks
Speaker 1: he paid. I said, oh, I'll be honest with you,
Speaker 1: like I just thought it was weird, like the whole
Speaker 1: spinning wild thing. And he was like, you know, I'm
Speaker 1: I'm really sorry if that was offensive to you. He
Speaker 1: was like, but this is just like how I've kind
Speaker 1: of been. I don't want you to think that I didn't,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm not interested. And he was like, I
Speaker 1: paid for the drinks because you know, I just didn't
Speaker 1: think about it. But normally when I have a meal
Speaker 1: with someone, I do split it and he was like,
Speaker 1: I just that's how I've been. He was like, I'm
Speaker 1: disgusted bringing up my face is probably showing on YouTube.
Speaker 1: This this just honestly, I mean he could be discussing
Speaker 1: what it is. I wanted to see him again and
Speaker 1: I wanted to figure out what it was. Obviously I
Speaker 1: couldn't keep going to me, it's less about you having
Speaker 1: money and more about you being generous. Yes, you know,
Speaker 1: because you like if you don't have like you could
Speaker 1: have ten dollars in your pocket and like we're going
Speaker 1: on a date, but if you spent eight of those
Speaker 1: dollars and just like me knowing that you spent that
Speaker 1: those eight dollars, like that shows. That's why when I
Speaker 1: was dating Jeeves, the ship that we would do together
Speaker 1: and the dates he would take me on, Like I
Speaker 1: was so impressed, like everything that I would want to do.
Speaker 1: Maybe I wasn't eating scrgo would I love? But I
Speaker 1: mean he was actually cheap in Paris. I mean yeah,
Speaker 1: but that's because maybe Hamburgers a chieve here but expensive
Speaker 1: somewhere else. That makes sense. But I mean no, I
Speaker 1: was like really impressed with the thought he would put
Speaker 1: into things and he knew what to do with prisman.
Speaker 1: So I'm like, fuck it. If I want to do
Speaker 1: some five our missions ship, I'll pay for you because
Speaker 1: it's a ship. I like, You've made it work enough.
Speaker 1: But I couldn't keep it going with this dude because
Speaker 1: I was like, I see how it works. Like when
Speaker 1: I want my bitches, we do. I'll get the drinks
Speaker 1: for one bar, you get it for the second bar.
Speaker 1: If he can't even think like that, it's just tacky
Speaker 1: to me. UM. So I want to dive into myths
Speaker 1: of feminism. Um, I'm glad we have that conversation. I
Speaker 1: want you guys to like join in the comba with us,
Speaker 1: share how you feel about it. Um. Yeah to myth
Speaker 1: number one feminist hate men and are anti men. Uh. So,
Speaker 1: like I've got the bell hooks here. UM. Shout out
Speaker 1: to my homegirl Gila. She sent this book in the
Speaker 1: mail to me and I fucking love it. I want
Speaker 1: to read this excerpt that I really like. UM. Without
Speaker 1: men as allies in uh, in the struggle of feminist movement,
Speaker 1: we will not progress. Uh. As it is, we have
Speaker 1: to do so much work to correct the assumption deeply
Speaker 1: embedded in the cultural psyche that feminism is anti mail,
Speaker 1: feminism is anti sexism. A male who is divested of
Speaker 1: male privilege who has embraced feminist politics is a worthy
Speaker 1: comrade in the struggle in no way a threat to feminism,
Speaker 1: whereas a female who remains embedded to the idea of
Speaker 1: sexist thinking that men are bullshit. She didn't write that. Um,
Speaker 1: but you know what I'm saying and basically thinking and
Speaker 1: infiltrating that the feminist movement shouldn't include men is a
Speaker 1: dangerous threat women that act like that. And I really
Speaker 1: like that because it kind of makes me think too
Speaker 1: about like when people talk about not liking white allies
Speaker 1: that are popular and out there, you know, like I
Speaker 1: really do believe we need white people to sit at
Speaker 1: the tables and I won't have to see that. And
Speaker 1: so how did Obama get an office? Not all not
Speaker 1: did by black people, right, I mean, if you want
Speaker 1: to take it there, no, I mean it's just percent
Speaker 1: of us, right, maybe fifteen now, I don't know, like
Speaker 1: as far as in the country, but for women, I
Speaker 1: really like that, Like I'm not anti men at all, which,
Speaker 1: so what you're saying is it's because because I see
Speaker 1: it on the timeline a lot on her that a
Speaker 1: lot of people assume that women who are feminists or
Speaker 1: all for female power automatically are a niggazine ship. It's
Speaker 1: not the same like wanting women to have rights, wanting
Speaker 1: women to be empowered, wanting the sexual liberation of women
Speaker 1: to just own themselves doesn't automatically mean niggasine ship. And
Speaker 1: I don't know why men, I guess can't see that
Speaker 1: we can uplift ourselves and still want them because like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, y'all be ain't ship because you're like, that's
Speaker 1: the ship i'd be kind of like talking about, but
Speaker 1: like not for a second when I talk or joke
Speaker 1: about that in my ever against men. I love men,
Speaker 1: I love my male friends, I love male energy. I'm
Speaker 1: getting ready for right now. But when you see feminist
Speaker 1: on someone's ship, don't just you know, think you better run?
Speaker 1: And sorry, girl, my nail glue spill all of my purse,
Speaker 1: so I gotta receipt for eight dollars such to my
Speaker 1: goddamn um thing. But my bad No. So it's funny
Speaker 1: because the feminism movement right now niggas hate and I
Speaker 1: don't know why. Like I think I see a lot
Speaker 1: of men who hate like I think it's because of
Speaker 1: propaganda on TV. Like listen, a good friend of mine,
Speaker 1: I funk with him hard, and a lot of people
Speaker 1: don't is Andrew Schultz. He totally I mean, I don't
Speaker 1: know who that is? Hell yeah what? A lot of
Speaker 1: people will literally question why we keep bringing him on
Speaker 1: the show. It ain't that much more people like his
Speaker 1: episode is great. I'm saying people will question, but he doesn't.
Speaker 1: He'll make jokes about feminism, right, and so that idea
Speaker 1: of it, though, is that you know women are he's like,
Speaker 1: he'll say, like it's always an ugly woman, I ain't
Speaker 1: always look this way and blah blah blah blah blah.
Speaker 1: But that is really what people believe because that's what
Speaker 1: we see. It's only funny because we know we really
Speaker 1: see that ship. We see the idea of feminism looking
Speaker 1: that way. So I want you guys to all understand
Speaker 1: I'm a feminist. I bought some titties. I didn't I
Speaker 1: like it. I shave I wax like, I like wearing lipstick.
Speaker 1: I don't feel like feminism has a look. And I
Speaker 1: think that thinking that it's just one way is really
Speaker 1: the problem myths. I think another myth with feminism is that, um,
Speaker 1: we don't need it anymore. Um that I would love
Speaker 1: to talk about a lot of people feel like, oh, like,
Speaker 1: how the fuck can you, you know, really be a
Speaker 1: feminist when you're getting paid. Well, oh, you're out here,
Speaker 1: you're an entrepreneur, you're doing your thing. Like, but you're
Speaker 1: a feminist, Like what's really wrong? And so what a
Speaker 1: lot of people don't understand is that take a side wage.
Speaker 1: You have to take aside housewives, all of that ship.
Speaker 1: I live in New York City. I literally have been
Speaker 1: outside for maybe a total of ten minutes today, go
Speaker 1: and train to train, and four niggas have cat called me.
Speaker 1: How do you think that fucking makes me feel? Do?
Speaker 1: Does everyone just assume I like it? That is some
Speaker 1: fucking bullshit. That to me is anti feminism thinking just
Speaker 1: because it nigga compliments me. I like it. The fucking
Speaker 1: war again, sex workers right now, that's where we need feminism.
Speaker 1: Look at Alabama abortions, that's where we need feminism. Like
Speaker 1: it's all over the world especially, I mean, yeah, and
Speaker 1: this is where we live the world. I want to
Speaker 1: talk to you about that too, because I feel like
Speaker 1: that is a huge fucking myth that we don't need it,
Speaker 1: you know, stop thinking so fucking small, and even women
Speaker 1: too that kind of feel like it's bullshit when women
Speaker 1: march in the streets. Everyone has, in my opinion, when
Speaker 1: they speak on feminism, a different idea of what it
Speaker 1: means to them, or a situation. You just talked about
Speaker 1: one with music, right like when you were growing up.
Speaker 1: I don't know what Mandy does. I know when I
Speaker 1: think of mine, it's definitely being over sexualized and hyper sexualized.
Speaker 1: Like sometimes I hate that ship. I hate when people
Speaker 1: tell us we're doing well because we're cute. No, nigga,
Speaker 1: people can't see us right now. I mean, sure there's YouTube,
Speaker 1: but like our podcast is because our content is good.
Speaker 1: It's not because we're cute. You know what put it
Speaker 1: in the hours? Yeah, you know it's weird because I guess, yeah,
Speaker 1: like this, every time we talk about feminism, I get
Speaker 1: kind of quiet because I just I still don't really
Speaker 1: understand it. I'm here for women's rights, I'm here for
Speaker 1: sexual liberation and the women empowerment, but to me, it's
Speaker 1: completely different, Like I don't think about niggas at all. Like,
Speaker 1: to me, women empowerment is and it's why I say
Speaker 1: I have the best friends ever. Like women empowerment to
Speaker 1: me is me and my friends being on the phone
Speaker 1: for hours about how we're gonna grow our businesses or
Speaker 1: just uplifting each other, constantly being around other women like
Speaker 1: so to me, like me having so many female friends
Speaker 1: right now, like and I have so many, that to
Speaker 1: me as feminism. That to me is me being able
Speaker 1: to be what a bitch who may look badder than
Speaker 1: me and just be like do that ship and just
Speaker 1: constantly uplifting every woman that I'm around. Um, that to
Speaker 1: me as feminism, like just me being it's totally always
Speaker 1: around women. And that's like it's it's weird because I
Speaker 1: was even just telling my friends, I don't know if
Speaker 1: I want a boyfriend right now because I just am
Speaker 1: not really around a lot of tosastone like outside of
Speaker 1: the nig I fuck, like, I don't even have as
Speaker 1: many male friends as I had at one time. It's
Speaker 1: literally nothing but itches not be like bitch, I'm sick
Speaker 1: of y'all like not, but I'm just constantly around women.
Speaker 1: I want to see the women around me grow and
Speaker 1: anytime I meet a woman who's in this space, I'm like,
Speaker 1: how can we work together? And I've just built so
Speaker 1: many friendships because it's literally just that's feminism. I think
Speaker 1: it's great that you mentioned that phone call because a
Speaker 1: lot of men assume that female bonding has to do
Speaker 1: over the distaste for men and not even close like
Speaker 1: when I get on from like God gonna send me
Speaker 1: this book, you know what I mean, Like when I
Speaker 1: think it's important to like kind of what you just said,
Speaker 1: Like you don't you don't have like your idea of
Speaker 1: feminism or maybe you don't even have a like an
Speaker 1: umbrella term for you know, like you're living, you're walking,
Speaker 1: you're breathing it. And I think that's really important to know,
Speaker 1: like you these small gestures like it doesn't have to
Speaker 1: be you don't have to march in the street, you know,
Speaker 1: like you don't right get locked up, marg right, I
Speaker 1: protests and I aint getting locked up. I'll want to
Speaker 1: be whole in the time, arms don't hurt, I'll work
Speaker 1: out like that. But like supporting women and why feminism, Yes,
Speaker 1: that's but like to be confused about it. I think
Speaker 1: it's also just because you're not sure because we look
Speaker 1: at everyone's different idea and we're like, oh am I
Speaker 1: being a feminist, Like what am I doing actively? And
Speaker 1: blah blah blah. I could be personal, but I think
Speaker 1: it's just making the conscious um decision to see women
Speaker 1: right like and and and and and acknowledge that there
Speaker 1: are struggles that they have to i e. The cat
Speaker 1: calling thing, you know, sticking up for women when you
Speaker 1: see them out, taking care of the women in your life.
Speaker 1: And as far as taking care of I mean emotionally,
Speaker 1: you know, making sure that you're checking in. And I'm
Speaker 1: speaking to men right now because I think girls kind
Speaker 1: of just innately do it with each other. But like, yes,
Speaker 1: call your sisters, call your whole girls, see if they're good.
Speaker 1: You know, I mean, stop pushing to the side feminism
Speaker 1: because you think it's one way, just like you might
Speaker 1: have been mentioned walking in the street. Just because you
Speaker 1: won't do that doesn't mean that you're not a feminist.
Speaker 1: It doesn't mean that you can't sit here and ride
Speaker 1: for women too, like we all have to find I
Speaker 1: think our way of feminism, and I mean ship most
Speaker 1: of the feminism I do. I believe it's on the
Speaker 1: show sticking up for women, right, and it's like, Okay,
Speaker 1: how else can I do it? Like expressing yourself being
Speaker 1: able to talk about sex freely and in a fun way,
Speaker 1: Like I mean, it's the the episode with the two
Speaker 1: guys are here with thee looking. That would be fun
Speaker 1: and and it should be like that, right, And I
Speaker 1: really appreciate those guys who being super open and ship
Speaker 1: like that. But um, I also want to talk like
Speaker 1: briefly just about intersectional feminism. Um to the white listeners.
Speaker 1: We have all twenty six of you, I don't know, um,
Speaker 1: but I do appreciate white people listening to this show.
Speaker 1: I feel like you're already on the white path, on
Speaker 1: the white path, right, the white listens already on the
Speaker 1: white path, the right, not the wit is right. I
Speaker 1: feel like you're on the right path to like trying
Speaker 1: and like moving forward with it, but just remembers to
Speaker 1: include other women, women, women's women, black women, Latino women,
Speaker 1: all of us, not just yourselves. Um. I'm always super
Speaker 1: impressed when I go to a protest and I'll see
Speaker 1: like a white girl that like has a sign about
Speaker 1: black women or something else, and it's just like she
Speaker 1: just wants to get rid like a lot of white
Speaker 1: people feel that guilt. And listen, if you do feel
Speaker 1: that guilt, right just like I'm talking about right now,
Speaker 1: find a way to help another kind of woman other
Speaker 1: than yourself in any way that you can, and take
Speaker 1: yourself out of it. Yes, don't make it, just help.
Speaker 1: Just don't don't talk about it. Don't you know, I
Speaker 1: don't make it about you, Just to do it. I
Speaker 1: actually stopped Instagram, taking Instagram stories and posting protests because
Speaker 1: I felt that it looked to try hard and not genuine,
Speaker 1: because that's the vibe sometimes I get from going to
Speaker 1: protest when I see white girls out there. I'm sorry
Speaker 1: to say it, but I have felt that way, like
Speaker 1: it just kind of feels like it's like a picturesque
Speaker 1: thing and there's no real meaning behind it. I think
Speaker 1: maybe in this era of social media, I think that's
Speaker 1: even why I, um, aside from not wanting to get
Speaker 1: locked up and just be in the mix, but to me,
Speaker 1: the protest now has has become very um click like
Speaker 1: not click baby, but like um cloud chasing, almost like where,
Speaker 1: oh my god, this is the thing and I'm fighting
Speaker 1: for it, calls let me go walk and honestly, they're
Speaker 1: out there just taking pictures with their signs. It's all
Speaker 1: becoming like things just to go viral or to be
Speaker 1: posted on when you're walking sometimes. I don't know if
Speaker 1: like any of your us see this over walks whatever,
Speaker 1: but like I'll be walking talking to someone will just
Speaker 1: be like collecting our thoughts and like literally you have
Speaker 1: to take a step because someone's posting, are taking a
Speaker 1: picture on their phone, and it's like engage in this ship, bro,
Speaker 1: like understand what we're doing, Understand why we're out here,
Speaker 1: Like this is my purpose, Like I'm I'm doing this
Speaker 1: for you and other people, but like you do. And
Speaker 1: that's the weird thing because if we do post it,
Speaker 1: other people do want to become a part of something.
Speaker 1: But for me right now, it's just been a weird
Speaker 1: place to like post that ship. I don't know, you know,
Speaker 1: it's hard. It feels like you need fucking accolades just
Speaker 1: to fucking say, hey, I'm out here for the girls.
Speaker 1: You spent more time making that sign that you really
Speaker 1: than you really have, like being out here for bitches
Speaker 1: am I being And I say bitches with all respects,
Speaker 1: um But anyway, I also thought it would be good
Speaker 1: to like kind of end this before we get into
Speaker 1: our home mail by talking about a guy in our
Speaker 1: life that we are a man, maybe anyone we know
Speaker 1: personally each that has UM we feel as feminist or
Speaker 1: been in support of us daddies best feminist thing. Well,
Speaker 1: like even with a show like UM and I dam,
Speaker 1: I don't want call him because they listen to the show.
Speaker 1: So my friends, UM, like even they like. There's one
Speaker 1: who came to a few of the shows. He came
Speaker 1: to two of the shows during this leg, but he
Speaker 1: also was like, listen, I just want to support you.
Speaker 1: So he paid for my hotel rooms in Houston. UM.
Speaker 1: And then the other one that I mentioned when I
Speaker 1: started this show, he was super into UM, just supporting
Speaker 1: and I said, I wanted to get into the editing.
Speaker 1: He bought my MacBook Pro just because I was like,
Speaker 1: and Chris came over and I was like, I don't
Speaker 1: know how to do this, can you help teach me?
Speaker 1: But he's just been supportive all the way. He sent
Speaker 1: me this other thing, like anytime he finds anything about
Speaker 1: podcasting and stuff like that, UM, he sends it and
Speaker 1: literally it's so odd because they've all seen me grow
Speaker 1: from like literally needing them to now just them wanting
Speaker 1: to just show support. They're like, I know you don't
Speaker 1: need anything anymore. So them investing themselves into me and
Speaker 1: being here for what we do, like them even being
Speaker 1: okay with sharing our sexual escapades. And they'll literally send
Speaker 1: me snaps and stuff like them of them listening to
Speaker 1: my show in the car and I'm like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: you're listening up. You had like a romantic relationship and
Speaker 1: your business, but but supporting it in this way where
Speaker 1: we're being completely open about suddend Dick and it ain't
Speaker 1: there because they know when it's when I'm talking about
Speaker 1: them and when I'm not. So just having like people
Speaker 1: who support what we do. We feel that we are
Speaker 1: um a podcast where we empower other women, we talk
Speaker 1: about sexual liberation, and we're doing it in kind of
Speaker 1: a taboo fashion. And so to have men who I
Speaker 1: have been intimate with not shamey and not look down
Speaker 1: on me, but literally be like you're a superstar, Like
Speaker 1: what you're doing is making a difference and I'm so
Speaker 1: proud of you. That to me is means more than
Speaker 1: anything for men to support what we're doing. What what
Speaker 1: are you, I think, right, Um, I mean my husband
Speaker 1: Simon is just like I been a huge supporter of
Speaker 1: what I do and taught me a lot of about
Speaker 1: you know. Now, for those of you who haven't looked
Speaker 1: up yet, Mars has a bunch of pictures with her
Speaker 1: gorgeous kid hanging from her titty all over the world.
Speaker 1: You've taken these pictures, and I just, yeah, I want
Speaker 1: you to talk about that a little bit, like being
Speaker 1: and just your body and yeah, and just like kind
Speaker 1: of like very similar to what you're saying, Like like
Speaker 1: being with somebody where I could just be myself. That's
Speaker 1: so important. I could. I could be naked, I could
Speaker 1: wear what I want without feeling shamed, I could whatever,
Speaker 1: you know, I could be myself and I and I
Speaker 1: never thought I would get married. I never thought that
Speaker 1: this is how my like my trajectory would be. And
Speaker 1: and it could only have worked with somebody who allowed
Speaker 1: me to like move the way I move, be free.
Speaker 1: And it takes a very secure man be with a
Speaker 1: woman who is so um invested in her sexuality and
Speaker 1: like open about it, like just men don't know what
Speaker 1: to do with that because we always attached that people
Speaker 1: don't know what to do with that, you're a whole,
Speaker 1: you're slut like people. You're right, I'm sorry, but um,
Speaker 1: and I think maybe the pressure from men and specifically though,
Speaker 1: has hindered women from doing that. UM. So I'm gonna
Speaker 1: try to say maybe a friend and a lover. So
Speaker 1: two friends come to mind. A dude name one I
Speaker 1: know from Orlando and I know I don't text you
Speaker 1: back all the time, and I'm really sorry, but I'm
Speaker 1: really grateful for the text messages that you sent me
Speaker 1: about how proud you army um. And another friend a
Speaker 1: j um he was saying to me once a friend
Speaker 1: of mine when we were in l A and we
Speaker 1: were eating, he was like, Yo, everybody used to like
Speaker 1: talk to me, like when I was hanging out with you,
Speaker 1: they'd be like, yo, that girl is crazy, she's a whole,
Speaker 1: she's this and that. And he was like, now nigga's
Speaker 1: write me when I'm with you and they're like, how
Speaker 1: do you know? Easy? And it was like crazy to
Speaker 1: hear that, Like no, when someone over taging years and
Speaker 1: they say that ship and he's never told me that
Speaker 1: people said that to him when he was my friend.
Speaker 1: But it's just funny how the tables turned, so to
Speaker 1: know that there's a man in my life that like
Speaker 1: brushed that ship by platonic friendship and like still, I
Speaker 1: was like, no, that's my bit, you know um. And
Speaker 1: then I'll give a shout outs to someone I'm fucking
Speaker 1: I guess Beard bab it's a guy I've been dating
Speaker 1: for a few months, and like, so fucking dope. This
Speaker 1: nigga is like such a he made a joke once
Speaker 1: said he was like a fan, and like I really
Speaker 1: feel that, like knowing that he would listen to our
Speaker 1: show or like yeah, I just got done and coming
Speaker 1: to one of my shows, and like anytime we meet
Speaker 1: someone just piping me up, it's so fucking dope, like
Speaker 1: almost more than I'm doing it, you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: Like I love that just being excited about me and
Speaker 1: Mandy just like calling me to tell me how great
Speaker 1: things are, how he loves these clips, Like even when
Speaker 1: I'm talking about other niggas. You gotta be a really
Speaker 1: secure motherfucker to do that and then tell a friend
Speaker 1: in their face like yo, she'd be telling this story
Speaker 1: about this nigga. But I'm with him and it's all refreshing.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, like being able to be open with somebody,
Speaker 1: honest with somebody like what you're self. It's so refreshing.
Speaker 1: And women have always associated to like possessiveness with men
Speaker 1: caring about you, men acting a little crazy with them
Speaker 1: caring about you, and men wanting you to themselves are
Speaker 1: not showing anybody anything as like them caring. Because that
Speaker 1: had someone tell me like he'd let you do that
Speaker 1: he only fun and it's like, yeah, you know, stop
Speaker 1: thinking that. Men let the women that you're with open
Speaker 1: themselves up a little more and be comfortable enough around
Speaker 1: you so love you more. I really think that it
Speaker 1: is important. So before we get out of here, I
Speaker 1: think there is a good question I kind of want
Speaker 1: for you, because you know, you just told us you
Speaker 1: had a next and got married. I just got dumped.
Speaker 1: I'm ready to move on quick. However, even when lots
Speaker 1: of guys willing to hook up, I'm terrified and I
Speaker 1: always back out. Should I wait until the breakup is
Speaker 1: less fresh? Or should I just push myself out there?
Speaker 1: Thanks for being my best friends through this hard time?
Speaker 1: How do you guys? A very simple question, but I
Speaker 1: like that do you hear of for in the breakup?
Speaker 1: Do you start going out, What do you guys think
Speaker 1: about that? What is the usual? What makes you feel good?
Speaker 1: But not I want to like makes you feel good,
Speaker 1: but hopefully like in the healthiest way that you can
Speaker 1: because breakups can be hard. Um but look, I was
Speaker 1: in a not a good place when I broke up
Speaker 1: with with my eggs and that sh it just can't like.
Speaker 1: It was just like came blind, blind sided, spotted whatever.
Speaker 1: So I'm big with with energy, and so I feel
Speaker 1: like one of the worst things you can do when
Speaker 1: you have all of these emotions and you're sad and
Speaker 1: you're upset that it didn't work out, and you're doing
Speaker 1: all this, one of the worst things you can do
Speaker 1: is try to hide those emotions by being around other people,
Speaker 1: because what you actually do is you exert that that
Speaker 1: energy to the other person. You're masking your all of
Speaker 1: but just being around other people. And so I don't
Speaker 1: like that. I have also been around people who either
Speaker 1: had just gotten out of a breakup things like that,
Speaker 1: and little do you know, even though you're in the
Speaker 1: company of someone else, you bring up a lot of
Speaker 1: the things that happened because you feel like you want
Speaker 1: to vent, you want to get over and you project
Speaker 1: a lot, and like I said, with just the energy
Speaker 1: of being around somebody. I think, and it's what I've
Speaker 1: said in a past episode, in order to find happiness
Speaker 1: in other people, you first have to find happiness within yourself.
Speaker 1: So if you can't genuinely be happy in your own
Speaker 1: space or in your own home or in the room
Speaker 1: by yourself or at work, if you're genuinely not happy
Speaker 1: with where you are, you can't at all expect to
Speaker 1: find happiness from someone else. I think. So it's just
Speaker 1: gonna say, sit with your pain times, like you need
Speaker 1: that pain to like an order to heal its fear
Speaker 1: to someone else, have you. I mean, I'm sure we've
Speaker 1: all like dated someone that like was kind of situation
Speaker 1: ships in real life. But I mean I've been with
Speaker 1: someone that like had some past, Like I broke up
Speaker 1: and they were like all the way broken up, and
Speaker 1: I felt like it was baggage into what I had
Speaker 1: with them that do be having, like, but they're not
Speaker 1: like the breaks like fucking let go of that ship, bro, Like,
Speaker 1: don't bring that to me, Like, give me the honor
Speaker 1: of being with someone that's ready for this ship. That's fine,
Speaker 1: find other things that make you have happy like you
Speaker 1: could you could find like you could like really turn
Speaker 1: your pain into like what motivates you to like be
Speaker 1: the next big things. Right, that's the best thing to
Speaker 1: say about that find other things to make you happy
Speaker 1: because you don't have to find happiness in other people
Speaker 1: other relationships, like find it in And that's why I
Speaker 1: haven't been dating. I feel like, um for a little bit. Well,
Speaker 1: not only have I been really really busy, but like
Speaker 1: for such alongside, especially with the online dating, just a
Speaker 1: lot of dates that I went on was just bad.
Speaker 1: And I was like, not only am I wasting time?
Speaker 1: I just want to spend time around people that make
Speaker 1: me happy. Um, and I know I'm happy, So why
Speaker 1: am I wasting time with niggas that is just wet?
Speaker 1: So I actually I've been cussing out all my friends.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I blame them from what I'm single right now.
Speaker 1: I like, bitch, we just went on tour. I was
Speaker 1: around friends the entire tour. I'm playing trips. I went
Speaker 1: to the fucking dream of like every weekend I've I've done.
Speaker 1: I'm making plans with my friends and I'm like, y'all
Speaker 1: the reasons I'm single because I'm so happy, but I'm
Speaker 1: even happier around y'all. Then now I have no time
Speaker 1: to date. I don't want to be around niggas unless
Speaker 1: I'm getting foss. Honestly, when you end up finding someone
Speaker 1: like I'm waiting, all my friends still like trying to
Speaker 1: have me connect. When you when you grow your circle
Speaker 1: and you're like your your life around different ship and
Speaker 1: you schedule that ship and you're like growing your own
Speaker 1: happiness from within that ship works. Bro. I always say,
Speaker 1: like a great just one thing. I was just thinking
Speaker 1: about the best bodies come from breakups. Like whenever I
Speaker 1: get broken up with it's like immediate thing. I'm like hair,
Speaker 1: something changes or something, and then I'm in the gym
Speaker 1: like crazy, you did get real skinny have to love
Speaker 1: a boy, but she was sad. That's when you went.
Speaker 1: Was really in the gym like all the time. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because he was going through a break up and I
Speaker 1: was like, yo, break up at the same time. That's right,
Speaker 1: and like you know, it's just it just happened. But
Speaker 1: the art look at everything that comes out of pain,
Speaker 1: like all the beauty that comes gave us ship No.
Speaker 1: The Confessions album Lemonade Hello, Bellhooks talks about Lemonade. You
Speaker 1: might want to look that up after this, I will.
Speaker 1: She goes in on Beyonce. Does she crazy? What kind
Speaker 1: of crazy? Don't come? So, I mean Lemonade I fucking
Speaker 1: loved because I was just saying to my mom in
Speaker 1: the car we were talking about I played Old Town
Speaker 1: Road from my mom and she loved it. She's like,
Speaker 1: damn react to that song. It was like I was
Speaker 1: telling her she was. My mom was like, doesn't Beyonce
Speaker 1: have a country song? And I was like, yo, daddy,
Speaker 1: lessons in Lemonade. I'm like, this bitch came out with
Speaker 1: an album, a visual album, a country song, all because
Speaker 1: I don't know, tell you heartbreak really fucking bring some ship, bro.
Speaker 1: Even Beyonce can get cheated on. So well, I have
Speaker 1: no faith in anybody like calibery. This is why I
Speaker 1: make the chan ever would be ethnically nominogamous and the like,
Speaker 1: just enjoy other people because I cannot be Beyonce. Well,
Speaker 1: you said it in one of the last episodes, like
Speaker 1: Lauren London said one of the best things like, you
Speaker 1: don't possess people, you experience them, And so I think
Speaker 1: that that's like one of the best things that I'd
Speaker 1: be experienced in. Yeah, we we have to start to
Speaker 1: putting so much ownership people like is in including men
Speaker 1: with women. So again, even with what you said, just
Speaker 1: allowing women to be women. And if you want to
Speaker 1: get a clear idea of feminism, it's literally not feeling
Speaker 1: like we shouldn't do anything. It's allowing us to be
Speaker 1: who we are, to experience ourselves, to learn the same
Speaker 1: the aim, you know, privilege that men have. That's what
Speaker 1: feminism is. It's literally you're not saying a woman shouldn't, couldn't,
Speaker 1: you know, do anything, but just allowing us to kind
Speaker 1: of just be our own human being. And that's actually
Speaker 1: a really good thing what she said. So when you
Speaker 1: were saying gender roles right, you're saying you agree with them.
Speaker 1: You agree with I want to do that? Right, you do.
Speaker 1: And you made that choice, not because the dude is
Speaker 1: saying you should. So like, that is also a choice
Speaker 1: to to be in that role. But if a woman
Speaker 1: doesn't want it, don't sit here and tell me I'm
Speaker 1: less of a woman because I don't do laundry and
Speaker 1: I don't cook for niggas. I'm saying that's me but
Speaker 1: there are a lot of women like that and if
Speaker 1: if that's her choice, and there's a man for her too,
Speaker 1: because not every nigga need that. Well, we didn't have
Speaker 1: the whole episode, y'all came for us um b K
Speaker 1: chat when she was like, I got my pussy, that's
Speaker 1: all he needs. And we at that point in the show,
Speaker 1: we couldn't understand, like, bitch, all you're offering to nigga
Speaker 1: is your pussy. Well here's the thing though, what yeah
Speaker 1: a statement that she made. I don't even think we
Speaker 1: have to put cooking, cleaning, ship house shit out of it.
Speaker 1: Like if you're saying a dude should be just happy
Speaker 1: with your pussy, I think it dismissive to a person
Speaker 1: because first off, like I'm gonna be real with you people,
Speaker 1: since I've had scissors, who is my shorty? Like on
Speaker 1: my Graham, Like more frequent women are throwing way more
Speaker 1: pussy at me. And it even give me think like
Speaker 1: they'd be like yo, I bet you want to say
Speaker 1: it and they'll send me pictures on like bitch, you think,
Speaker 1: oh they don't want to suck me? Like what the
Speaker 1: fund is wrong with you? Girl? Try to kiss me
Speaker 1: in our live show in l A, like on the
Speaker 1: fucking mouth, like and to me, I really hate when
Speaker 1: people put so much fucking like don't get me wrong,
Speaker 1: like value your body and know you're the ship, but
Speaker 1: like don't really sit here and think you're pussy? Is
Speaker 1: that gold? And like that's all? But not only that
Speaker 1: they that's what I got from that. I but even
Speaker 1: the feminism like ways like we gotta make the stallion
Speaker 1: shout out to me yea. But there's been a video
Speaker 1: going around where she was like just performing and a
Speaker 1: girl slapped her ass and Megan turned around like but
Speaker 1: even as women of you know, sexual liberation and women empowerment,
Speaker 1: you need to allow just because you're wish. I'm so
Speaker 1: glad we're talking about this, Yes, because I didn't think
Speaker 1: that women have violated as they've been violating us all tour.
Speaker 1: I will say there's been quite quite a few women
Speaker 1: have asked, I love that, Can I grab your ass?
Speaker 1: Can I touch your tips? They've been wanting to touch
Speaker 1: me and wheezy and a lot of them do ask,
Speaker 1: but there have been times where and we get to
Speaker 1: choose that they can or not, and it defends their mood. Um,
Speaker 1: but a lot of women still have otherwise just grabbed
Speaker 1: us without asking. It's just like a little weird. You know.
Speaker 1: The men that have came, I like, I have to
Speaker 1: be like, I can't believe I'm even saying this. Any
Speaker 1: man that has come to the show has been so
Speaker 1: kind during me and greet like yo, many like can
Speaker 1: I can I take a cool and like totally like
Speaker 1: accepting if she says no? But like the girls been ready. Look,
Speaker 1: if you ever get pregnant, it's crazy. That's a whole
Speaker 1: another converse, like the touching, like oh you're sushing your
Speaker 1: stomach and ship like just walk like just walking up no,
Speaker 1: like people you don't know excuge. So I had to
Speaker 1: like build this armor around me when I was pregnant
Speaker 1: with my daughter because like people think that you don't
Speaker 1: want that energy touching your goddamn child. Yeah, that's crazy.
Speaker 1: That's crazy. It's so crazy. I want to bring up
Speaker 1: one thing that I actually hadn't here in it. Youveen
Speaker 1: saying that all I want to bring up one more
Speaker 1: thing to act more one man constantly like in my
Speaker 1: mind that I feel like this is true. But one
Speaker 1: of the myths that I had in there, I skipped
Speaker 1: over because the time was feminist. Can't listen to Wrap.
Speaker 1: I want to just say, you damn we can nothing.
Speaker 1: You know, Wrap is so fucking important, and this is
Speaker 1: why we all have to make sure women too, that
Speaker 1: we're not pitting rappers at each other, right, Like it's
Speaker 1: so important to have Chase the nigga. I don't even
Speaker 1: Chase Liqa, Like sorry, it's so fu dope to talk
Speaker 1: about that ship so long, Like let's talking talk about
Speaker 1: our own bodies with women. I love that ship and
Speaker 1: like worshiping our bodies and ourselves band doing it either
Speaker 1: it's women doing it too. Women are pinning each other
Speaker 1: against other women women. Imagine how dope a Cardi and
Speaker 1: Nikki like its other. I mean, but Nikki is mad
Speaker 1: and secure so she won't do it. But like you
Speaker 1: become a fit them together. But they did show us
Speaker 1: a little bit of Nikki this basic. But I do
Speaker 1: kind of feel bad when they compare looks and ship
Speaker 1: like that with these women because I've never seen them
Speaker 1: do that with niggas. And it's over over sexualizing women
Speaker 1: just like they wanted to do with you, and it sucks.
Speaker 1: It's like, God, damn, let the girl wrap. Like talking
Speaker 1: about make the stallion's body like, which is our body is?
Speaker 1: I mean, all right, we didn't talk about how big
Speaker 1: Yo Gotti forehead is, and then we might be ugly
Speaker 1: wrap and they'd be like, he's not even cute. Go
Speaker 1: way back here, like we gotta start calling them niggas out.
Speaker 1: Let's put them against let's do it out. Hey tweeted
Speaker 1: this ship with She said, to be a woman who
Speaker 1: loves hip hop at times is to be in love
Speaker 1: with your abuser. Ever doing so, then to the to
Speaker 1: love a rapper is to be a love to be
Speaker 1: in love with hip hop, and they love your abusers sometimes,
Speaker 1: That's what she wrote. To be a woman that loves
Speaker 1: hip hop and I don't. There's a really good hip
Speaker 1: hop feminist book that you might like. It's called um
Speaker 1: When the Hens Come Home to Roost or something, When
Speaker 1: the Hens come home through something like that. I'll check
Speaker 1: it out. Yeah, but yeah, I mean that's why I
Speaker 1: put problematic feminists because I've had so many people in
Speaker 1: my messages when I like post nasty as songs like wow,
Speaker 1: but like it's talking about bitches at home, that's fine
Speaker 1: choice to pop my pussy say that, ma'am so fucking
Speaker 1: I'm problematic is fun because y'all like to be called
Speaker 1: a slat when I'm getting fucked. That that's the one
Speaker 1: word I can't do. Bitch, but I don't want to.
Speaker 1: But didn't she But didn't she dit like jay Z
Speaker 1: and Beyonce's music video. Yeah, but I'm assuming, like she said,
Speaker 1: she said, sometimes like po women in hip hop, sometimes
Speaker 1: I'm assuming, like the hip hop that's like against women. Well,
Speaker 1: I love it, no, especially city girls. Chicken heads come home,
Speaker 1: chicken heads come home to us. You know what's crazy?
Speaker 1: I ain't know. Oh no, I was thinking so back
Speaker 1: in the day, like we used to do, like um,
Speaker 1: we had basketball teams. This was like elementary school, and
Speaker 1: we could come up with our own names, and we
Speaker 1: named ourselves the Project Chicks. But I didn't know what
Speaker 1: that meant back then. But that's when the song about
Speaker 1: getting me a project ship, and I was like, I
Speaker 1: didn't know it's a bad thing until people like you
Speaker 1: want to be called what give me a raight? No? Okay,
Speaker 1: well that's what I wanted to be called with Project
Speaker 1: Chicks back in the day. But I also wanted my
Speaker 1: dream car with and then Paula with chameleon paint job
Speaker 1: in rams. So don't judge me. Okay, Florida ship. Sorry
Speaker 1: are you from Florida? Yeah, so I know what a project.
Speaker 1: Well that's up here basically as we call it, the hood. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there were no jack, There was no jecks like that,
Speaker 1: Like he got building saw. Like they can still live
Speaker 1: in houses in the hood, like nice house that have
Speaker 1: them hood house house in Pine Hills. Boy, imagine in Brooklyn.
Speaker 1: Yeah no, like so you know you still have a
Speaker 1: yard in the hood. So it's just like you know
Speaker 1: Sam in California. Yeah, residential suburbs, baby boy, then they
Speaker 1: got a backyard. She was she had our garden. So
Speaker 1: working on listeners find you if they're interested in following
Speaker 1: you in your your photos and everything you do Instagram
Speaker 1: Marzi Jane m a r z y Jane Marzi Jane
Speaker 1: dot com. Projects like yeah, I wrote a baby book. Oh,
Speaker 1: um what else? Yeah, I'm doing a lot of stuff
Speaker 1: with the magazine. Um. The last issue we did I
Speaker 1: interviewed Salon was cute. Um. Yeah, I'm working on a documentary. Um. Well,
Speaker 1: we'll keep you guys updated. Um. The magazine also the
Speaker 1: books in which we referenced staring this episode, we'll go
Speaker 1: ahead and put in the description, UM, but we want
Speaker 1: to thank you for coming in and as you guys know,
Speaker 1: we want to give a huge shout out to all
Speaker 1: of our patrons. Because of you, we were able to
Speaker 1: do the tour um. And so if you guys are
Speaker 1: not yet or if you guys are already caught up
Speaker 1: on all of our episodes and you can't get enough
Speaker 1: of Wheezy and I and all of our great guests
Speaker 1: that we have on the show, please become a patron
Speaker 1: at patreon dot com backslash Horrible Decisions. That's how you're
Speaker 1: gonna find it, because we do have an eighteen plus setting,
Speaker 1: so we don't pop up in the search um. But
Speaker 1: for just five dollars a month, you guys get three
Speaker 1: bonus episodes at the top tier fifteen dollars. We give
Speaker 1: you guys an opportunity to have merch. We are looking
Speaker 1: to possibly start store as well, being the look for
Speaker 1: that to come, but you still will only be able
Speaker 1: to get T shirts for now. If you are a patron,
Speaker 1: so gonna patron shirts the ones that you've seen. We
Speaker 1: will not be selling those shirts. There's are never gonna
Speaker 1: be those are only going to be for people that
Speaker 1: are patrons of the show, so see him, you know. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we want to thank you all so much, and as always,
Speaker 1: we're gonna leave you guys with a clip from one
Speaker 1: of our bonus episodes. Um, but we want to thank
Speaker 1: Mars for coming into and this has been yet another
Speaker 1: episode of horrible Decisions. By that's it for today's show.
Speaker 1: You're about to enjoy one of our Patreon clips. But
Speaker 1: we did want to once again give a big thanks
Speaker 1: to our sponsors True and Company, that best selling True
Speaker 1: Body collection and over seventy wire free options. You'll want
Speaker 1: them all. It's an amazing bra six years of collecting
Speaker 1: data from seven million women to make a gain changer
Speaker 1: True and code dot Com slash horrible off on your
Speaker 1: first bra with them. You can lounge in it, work
Speaker 1: out in it where it is a fucking top like
Speaker 1: I did this weekend. Whatever, Just send me the dm
Speaker 1: me the picture of your tippies in it. I would
Speaker 1: appreciate that. Use the code horrible off, but I do
Speaker 1: want the tip picks and return. Thanks. It's bonus beach. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's on. We are starting hiding. We just did an
Speaker 1: episode with some girls that have a podcast about tripping
Speaker 1: on ship and I'm highs but you know me. Um, well,
Speaker 1: hey guys, it's another bonus episode. Before we start, I
Speaker 1: want to shout out to all of you who have
Speaker 1: supported our brand. Um, y'all, y'all are real ones. Y'all
Speaker 1: really are. Um. Oh. Also, UM, shout out to Dread.
Speaker 1: I have the picture we're gonna sign Dread. Yes, um,
Speaker 1: thank you for getting us somehow. We finally got our mail,
Speaker 1: which we have a very hard time get and we
Speaker 1: can start getting ships and because it was almost impossible,
Speaker 1: but Dread, shout out to you. Um, we're gonna be
Speaker 1: sending your signed photo back. Thank you for being a
Speaker 1: long time supporter of us. UM. As always, So before
Speaker 1: we start, everybody else like what about me? I know yeah,
Speaker 1: But before we start, I guess we're gonna start up
Speaker 1: with a quick catch up because the last few um,
Speaker 1: we did have a couple of solo bonus episodes. So
Speaker 1: now Weezie and I are back in the motherfucker's studio
Speaker 1: and I guess you have what you want to catch
Speaker 1: up real quick with them all. I went to Miami
Speaker 1: with Beard day God. We had a long as vacation
Speaker 1: we got along great. Um, I feel like I should
Speaker 1: tell all this On the regular episode saw Jesus and Marrio,
Speaker 1: that was lit, got some new dick, been on some dates.
Speaker 1: I'm going on a roll, dog, You've got a lot
Speaker 1: going on. I've just been like really trying to um
Speaker 1: take in the open relationship energy, because when I'm falling
Speaker 1: for someone, it's very hard for me to stay or
Speaker 1: or stay on that path of like, oh, let let's
Speaker 1: explore because I'm so in love in that moment. Right.
Speaker 1: But now that the dust is settled and i just
Speaker 1: know like we're there, like I'm in a really comfortable lot.
Speaker 1: It'll be like almost knowing him a year coming up
Speaker 1: soon and dating her for a while. Like now I
Speaker 1: just know where we are, and now I'm like, Okay,
Speaker 1: now i can open myself up to new experiences because
Speaker 1: I'm now not weird about saying them. Bringing another negative
Speaker 1: hedonism was where I really thought there'd be an issue,
Speaker 1: and we all had such a great talk about it,
Speaker 1: Like both of them were just super chill and they're like,
Speaker 1: why would you be nervous about good? Because you were
Speaker 1: freaking out like a motherfucker. Mainly because once he couldn't go.
Speaker 1: I felt like it was really fucked up for a
Speaker 1: trip we've all been planning for six months to bring
Speaker 1: another niggad but like they made a little funny comment
Speaker 1: about it, and then it was like, look like, we
Speaker 1: get how you feel about us. How how can you,
Speaker 1: I don't know, how can we sit here and preach
Speaker 1: other We're gonna be open and care about each other
Speaker 1: and love each other and fun other people, and then
Speaker 1: shoot on you for bringing someone else. You might be
Speaker 1: able to get a little mild jealousy, but it's sucked
Speaker 1: up to do it that way. So that makes sense.
Speaker 1: I'm glad we got there. Um, I mean that makes
Speaker 1: I guess that's a lot. So y'all hear. I guess
Speaker 1: more about Miami all of that. Yeah, y'all go here.
Speaker 1: I guess on a regular episode. I wanted to bring up,
Speaker 1: um two things. UM, I guess. The first one is
Speaker 1: how I feel cursed right now. UM. I have not
Speaker 1: had New Dick all year, but I I've had Dick
Speaker 1: other than seven that I've but like Dick from the past,
Speaker 1: I haven't had New Dick since New Year's Eve. Um.
Speaker 1: Other than that, I have just really been fun for
Speaker 1: the last four months. He's the only dick I've taken
Speaker 1: into my vagina and my mouth and actually no, not
Speaker 1: my mouth. I did give head in l A, but
Speaker 1: that was it. We didn't suck, uh yeah, because that's
Speaker 1: long one of my little Mary booze and he didn't
Speaker 1: really He's the condom just was affecting his performance. So
Speaker 1: you would have fucked, yeah, but it just he just
Speaker 1: didn't really want to wear economy, wasn't in the mood
Speaker 1: and just wouldn't stay hard and was he asking you
Speaker 1: not to? Um? We just didn't even have that conversation.
Speaker 1: He was just like, it's the condom and that's and
Speaker 1: I was, It's okay, it's fine. Um. But so outside
Speaker 1: of that, I've literally only been able to fuck. Why
Speaker 1: have you? Have you only been able to you know?
Speaker 1: I feel like my mind is rejecting other people. I
Speaker 1: think I'm maybe over vetting um as far as I
Speaker 1: want to be sure that we would be compatible if
Speaker 1: I have sex with someone else, because I'm having such
Speaker 1: amazing sex with him, and also I know that I
Speaker 1: don't want a whole bunch of casual sex partners. I
Speaker 1: am looking for maybe a partner, So it's like, if
Speaker 1: you're not looking to be my boyfriend or you're not
Speaker 1: kinky as I want you to be, I genuinely don't
Speaker 1: see the purpose and fucking you. But do you think
Speaker 1: that like you could be blocking your best things by
Speaker 1: not letting it get there first, Like I don't, I know,
Speaker 1: Like I don't. To me, I genuinely am like I
Speaker 1: either want to be super kinky and nasty with you
Speaker 1: and have that vice explored with you because I don't
Speaker 1: get I don't get to peg or finger. No, but
Speaker 1: you said you're going to be my boyfriend, right, so like,
Speaker 1: But to me, our conversation doesn't need to be all
Speaker 1: about sex if you really want a relationship with me.
Speaker 1: So to me, I meeting anyone that I'm not meeting
Speaker 1: anyone that I even really want to fuck in real life.
Speaker 1: So speaking of