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Speaker 1: It's another jewel on the twenties. I'm moving ninety two

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Speaker 1: point five. Hello. Hi there, my name is Darvin Schlog.

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Speaker 1: I'm calling from grocery store delivery. How are you doing?

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I'm good. How are you today? I'm not

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Speaker 1: too bad? Thank you for asking. Is this Catherine? Yes,

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Speaker 1: this is Catherine. The reason for my call is that

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Speaker 1: you've been ordering groceries from US online now for a

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Speaker 1: few months. I hope everything's been to your satisfaction. It's

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Speaker 1: been great. Everything has been really good. I mean the

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Speaker 1: delivery people have been on time and friendly, and my

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Speaker 1: orders have always been right. So I'm really happy, wonderful.

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Speaker 1: That's great to hear, you know. Also, as a complimentary service,

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Speaker 1: I wanted to call and give you some health advice

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Speaker 1: on what you've been ordering. Oh okay, I didn't know

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Speaker 1: what you guys did that. We just started doing it,

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Speaker 1: and I've been looking at the last three orders that

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Speaker 1: you've had, and it seems like you've got some major

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Speaker 1: food issues going on. Oh well, I don't think so.

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Speaker 1: I think I eat pretty healthy. Okay, yeah, I don't

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Speaker 1: know about all that. Let's start with the processed meats. Huh,

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Speaker 1: you got hot dogs? And bacon in your card on

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Speaker 1: this one. Well, okay, I mean, but that's not an

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Speaker 1: access or anything. I mean, a little bit of bacon

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Speaker 1: is not going to kill anyone. I'd hate to send

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Speaker 1: one of our delivery people with a pin so they

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Speaker 1: can help you sign your death certificate. You know, I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: I said I'd hate to have to send one of

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Speaker 1: our delivery people over there with a pin to give

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Speaker 1: you heard you the first time? I just I mean,

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Speaker 1: that doesn't sound like a health advice to you. It

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Speaker 1: sounds like you're judging me, and I don't appreciate you

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Speaker 1: judging me. You know, your job is to send me groceries,

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Speaker 1: not to judge what I buy. Right with all those

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Speaker 1: processed meats, you've got to be spending a lot of

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Speaker 1: time on the can huh excuse me? Yeah, just a gas,

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Speaker 1: Just a guess, lately inappropriate thing to say. All right,

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Speaker 1: that is not okay? All right? Well, I hear you

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Speaker 1: getting upset, but I don't hear you saying that you aren't.

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Speaker 1: It is none of your business what I'm eating, or

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Speaker 1: when I go to the bathroom or any of that.

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Speaker 1: Your business is to deliver groceries, and that's what I'm

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Speaker 1: trying to do help get you the groceries that are

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Speaker 1: going to keep you healthy. So let's move on to

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Speaker 1: the oreos like you know what, No, you don't get

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Speaker 1: to move on to my oreos. My oreos are my oreos. Okay,

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Speaker 1: hands off my oreos and your opinions. How about that? Well,

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Speaker 1: did you know that three of those babies will set

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Speaker 1: you back one hundred and sixty calories and seven grams

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Speaker 1: of fat? And I'm guessing you're not just eating three?

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Speaker 1: Am I? Right? Cap you know what? You're right. I'm

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Speaker 1: not eating three. I'm eating the whole skin back, all right.

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Speaker 1: And that's my business. It's my money, it's my groceries,

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Speaker 1: and it's my damn business and not yours. So if

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Speaker 1: I want to order six hundred tacks to oreos and

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Speaker 1: eat them all in one sitting, I well, yeah, and

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Speaker 1: that's what I feared your response is going to be.

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Speaker 1: So in this order, I went ahead and replace the

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Speaker 1: orioles with an organic fiber supplement. You are welcome. No, no,

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Speaker 1: don't shoot, don't you touch my order? All right, Catherine,

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Speaker 1: I've got a saying for you. You remember, Okay, when

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Speaker 1: you're thinking snacks, think of flax. Okay, flax seed. Way

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Speaker 1: more help you could do with that flax, and you

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Speaker 1: could shove it up your own all right, and I

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Speaker 1: would comes out, you know, don't even take it out.

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Speaker 1: Don't even take it out, just shove the whole thing

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Speaker 1: up there, because that is pretty much what you sound like.

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Speaker 1: Some with a stick up. All right. My life is fun.

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Speaker 1: Your life sounds like giving jem groceries and don't dare

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Speaker 1: touch a thing in my basket. Well, one thing's for sure.

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Speaker 1: You are fired up about getting healthy, and I like that,

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Speaker 1: and that was the reason for this phone call. I'm

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Speaker 1: glad that we're seeing eye to eye. We are not

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Speaker 1: seeing eye to eye. Well, I'm just looking out for you.

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Speaker 1: I mean, if nobody in your family is going to

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Speaker 1: do it, it might as well be me. No, I

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Speaker 1: don't care you talk about my family like that. You

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Speaker 1: aren't talking to me. You aren't talking to me, mister,

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Speaker 1: all right. You are the one with the problem. You

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Speaker 1: you know, you're right. My biggest problem. I care too much.

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Speaker 1: And I'm really glad we could have this talk and

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Speaker 1: if you wouldn't mind, after we hang up here, if

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Speaker 1: you could take a short Customer Satisfaction survey for me.

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Speaker 1: Oh I would love trate you. Oh yeah, both shaming

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Speaker 1: me over oil? Is that what your company teaches you?

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Speaker 1: Wait to tell them what I think about that. My company,

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Speaker 1: I Acly, teaches me to get people really fired up

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Speaker 1: with prank phone calls. So I'm glad I could do

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Speaker 1: that for you today. And like I said, if you

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Speaker 1: could just get a customer satisfaction survey from you, shut up.

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Speaker 1: It's better not be a joke it is. This is

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Speaker 1: actually Jewel from Brook and Jewel in the morning doing

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Speaker 1: a phone tap on you. Your best friend Laurie set

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Speaker 1: you up. Oh my god. She said you were having

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Speaker 1: a crappy week and wanted to make you laugh. I

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Speaker 1: think you need a bag of Oreos after that down

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Speaker 1: I I totally do, remember Catherine, when you're thinking snacks,

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Speaker 1: wake up every morning with Jewil phone taps on the

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Speaker 1: twenty two point five