Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, it's Bill Courtney and this is shop Talk
Speaker 1: number eleven, Number eleven, Alex, I'm not even going to
Speaker 1: say I can't believe we already it on eleven, because
Speaker 1: you're gonna give me a crap Shop Talk number eleven.
Speaker 1: As everybody knows, I've coached a lot, right thirty one
Speaker 1: years of football, but what you may not know is
Speaker 1: I've also coached soccer, swimming, baseball, a lot of basketball,
Speaker 1: a lot of basketball. But in football, there's a play
Speaker 1: that pretty much everybody knows. It's called interference. It's when
Speaker 1: a defensive back er, linebacker hits a receiver prior to
Speaker 1: the ball arriving and flag of stone. It's fifteen yard penalty.
Speaker 1: It's one of the larger penalties you can get in
Speaker 1: the game of football. Interference is a problem and you
Speaker 1: get penalized for it, and sometimes it can change the
Speaker 1: outcome of the game. So on chat Talk number eleven today,
Speaker 1: we're going to talk about an infraction that can change
Speaker 1: the game, and it's called parental interference. That's coming up,
Speaker 1: But first a few messages from our general sponsors, and
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Speaker 1: with Russell Butler in Memphis on Saturday, July twentieth. I
Speaker 1: hope some of you will join us. We'll be right back, Okay, everybody,
Speaker 1: friendal interference? What the world am I talking about? I
Speaker 1: don't know. It was a couple of weeks ago. I
Speaker 1: can't even Alex, who was the conversation with? Do you remember?
Speaker 1: It was? Uh? Robert? Was it right now? It wasn't?
Speaker 1: It was a listener. A listener that's that's right. A
Speaker 1: couple of weeks ago, a listener out of the blue
Speaker 1: just said, you know, at the end, I say, if
Speaker 1: you've got any thoughts or want to talk about it,
Speaker 1: and it's so I get an email and Jim Lamb,
Speaker 1: if you're out there, Jim, this is a shout out
Speaker 1: to you. Here's what he said. Love your podcast, including
Speaker 1: Shop Talk. I would really like to hear your thoughts
Speaker 1: on the world of travel youth sports. Here in Missouri
Speaker 1: we also refer to them as club sports. It seems
Speaker 1: like so many parents are spending so much money on
Speaker 1: club fees, uniforms, equipment, travel cost, hotels, airfare, gas. I
Speaker 1: think their kid's going to be the next superstar, or
Speaker 1: we'll get that full ride scholarship or be a pro. Yet,
Speaker 1: in reality, the club team had so many people try
Speaker 1: out for their Level four team, they just added a
Speaker 1: fifth team and collected more money. I think these kids
Speaker 1: spend too much time playing one sport year round and
Speaker 1: show experienced different sports and different experiences. Bill. What say
Speaker 1: you from Jim Lamb in Saint Louis, Missouri. So you
Speaker 1: asked and the shop talks for you. Jim parental interference. Guys.
Speaker 1: I've had four kids. They've all played every sport imaginable,
Speaker 1: and I've coached all of them, and I lettered in
Speaker 1: six sports in high school. The greatest memories I have
Speaker 1: as a kid playing sports was that every season brought
Speaker 1: something new. And the greatest experience I had as a
Speaker 1: parent is that every season brought something new for my
Speaker 1: kids to do. And the muscle memory and the lessons
Speaker 1: you learn playing soccer are completely different than the muscle
Speaker 1: memory and the lessons you learned playing baseball or softball,
Speaker 1: which are completely different from the muscle memory and the
Speaker 1: lessons you learn playing basketball. And because each sport comes
Speaker 1: with a different coach, the life lessons you learn and
Speaker 1: the perspective you get changes with every team that you're
Speaker 1: on because your teammates are different and your coach is different,
Speaker 1: And that really broad wide cross section of lessons for
Speaker 1: both your body and for you socially, I think is
Speaker 1: paramount to your growth. I've had one kid get invited
Speaker 1: to try out for the United States Junior Olympic soccer team,
Speaker 1: and other kids get invited to play on you know,
Speaker 1: high high level quote travel teams, and we always declined
Speaker 1: and the reason we declined is we wanted our kids
Speaker 1: to have that odd look at sports and that broad
Speaker 1: experience of being mentored by different coaches with different perspectives,
Speaker 1: different ideas, and different lessons. So, Jim, I couldn't agree
Speaker 1: with you more. When we pennedhole kids into one sport
Speaker 1: and we spend umpteen thousands of dollars on private lessons
Speaker 1: for that one sport, and then the travel club teams
Speaker 1: for that one sport, and we shove that kid into
Speaker 1: all your long one sport, I think we rob our
Speaker 1: kids of growth. And further, I think it becomes more
Speaker 1: of a job to the kid oftentimes than it is fun.
Speaker 1: It's a fifteen yard penalty for parental interference. Let your
Speaker 1: kids learn, let your kids grow, Let them be part
Speaker 1: of varied experiences. Don't pigeonhole them. Here's the truth. Ninety
Speaker 1: nine point seven one percent of the kids in all
Speaker 1: ages playing U sports today from first grade through their
Speaker 1: senior in high school, ninety nine point seven percent of
Speaker 1: them will never make one dollar playing any sport. That
Speaker 1: means that ninety nine point seven percent of the kids
Speaker 1: playing U sports today all the way through high school
Speaker 1: are going to have to make a living doing something
Speaker 1: other than playing a sport, and the lessons they learn
Speaker 1: in a broad world are going to serve them far
Speaker 1: better than if they're pigeonholed and tracked in one sport.
Speaker 1: The other thing that happens in these worlds that I see,
Speaker 1: obviously it's helicopter parenting, and that's revolting. We need to
Speaker 1: let our kids skin their knees. We need to let
Speaker 1: our kids fail, and we need to let our kids
Speaker 1: be put on the bench. That may be one of
Speaker 1: the greatest lessons of life is what do you have
Speaker 1: to do to get yourself off the bench? And that's
Speaker 1: improved and work hard and learn. And it can't be
Speaker 1: going to the coach every time our kid gets benched
Speaker 1: because it hurts our feelings. Let your kids' feelings get hurt,
Speaker 1: Let them skin their knees, let them learn life lessons
Speaker 1: that these things are supposed to teach in the first place,
Speaker 1: that will last long after the days of kicking the
Speaker 1: ball or hitting the ball, or swinging the bat or
Speaker 1: making the tackle or whatever are gone. The other thing is,
Speaker 1: please don't live vicariously through your children's sports endeavors. Nobody
Speaker 1: wants to hear about a high school hero. Whatever you
Speaker 1: did in high school, don't try to relive it for
Speaker 1: their kids. Or whatever you didn't accomplish in high school
Speaker 1: and wish you had, don't try to achieve that dream
Speaker 1: later in life through your kids. It's gross. Everybody sees it,
Speaker 1: but most importantly, kid feels it puts undue pressure on them,
Speaker 1: takes the fun of the game away from them, takes
Speaker 1: the learning away, and it will make them resent both
Speaker 1: the sport and you. That happens thirty one years of coaching.
Speaker 1: I've seen it all. I've seen great parents, I've seen
Speaker 1: terrible parents. I've seen helicopter parents. I've seen seen vicarious
Speaker 1: living parents. I've seen it all. It runs the gamut.
Speaker 1: Our children need a broad spectrum of lessons, and that
Speaker 1: comes with allowing them to be involved in a broad
Speaker 1: spectrum of stuff the arts, theater, music, lessons, certainly, sports,
Speaker 1: student government, all of the things that are available to
Speaker 1: them to help them grow and to help them learn
Speaker 1: lessons from a varied, diverse group of teachers and mentors.
Speaker 1: Don't have parental interference. Don't don't take away the opportunity
Speaker 1: for your kids to catch those lessons by tackling them
Speaker 1: before the ball, before those lessons are even able to
Speaker 1: reach them. I do think that most parents involved in
Speaker 1: all of this stuff are well intentioned and do just
Speaker 1: want want the best for their kids. But oftentimes our
Speaker 1: desire for our kids manifest themselves in a way they
Speaker 1: didn't healthy. Let your kids do what they want to do.
Speaker 1: Let your kids get involved in all kinds of different things.
Speaker 1: Support those endeavors, let them fail, let them skin their knees,
Speaker 1: let them be benched, let them be second fiddle. And
Speaker 1: where you come in as a parent is you work
Speaker 1: with them and teach them how to get off the bench,
Speaker 1: how not to fall the next time, Teach them how
Speaker 1: to compete, teach them how to how to be a
Speaker 1: good teammate, teach them how to come back from failing,
Speaker 1: and then teach them how to rejoice in the successes
Speaker 1: of improvement. Don't be a printal interferer, So Jim from
Speaker 1: Saint Louis, that's what I think about what you said.
Speaker 1: I appreciate the question, and I hope I hope shop
Speaker 1: Talk has answered at least by perspective on your question.
Speaker 1: That's shop Talk number eleven. Everybody. I'm Bill Courtney, don't
Speaker 1: be a printal Interferer. I'll see you next week.