Speaker 1: Double Elvis. Blood on the Tracks is a production of
Speaker 1: I Heart Radio and Double Elvis. Brian Wilson was a
Speaker 1: musical genius and one of the greatest songwriters of all time.
Speaker 1: He caught melodies like they were waves. He bottled good
Speaker 1: vibrations like no one else, and he picked up bad
Speaker 1: vibrations too. He broke down, he tripped hard. He didn't
Speaker 1: just hear music, he heard voices. He tried to lose
Speaker 1: those voices by making a teenage symphony to God called Smile.
Speaker 1: But somewhere along the way, Brian Wilson lost his mind instead.
Speaker 1: This is his story. I can't believe there's only a
Speaker 1: couple more of these Brian Wilson tapes. Oh hello, by
Speaker 1: the way, Rhonda Moss in here again. Like I was saying,
Speaker 1: we're right at the end of these tapes. Now I
Speaker 1: just found one that has Smiled two thousand four written
Speaker 1: on it. But maybe that's for next time. First, there's
Speaker 1: one that seems to be the final tape from Brian's
Speaker 1: home recordings. Let's have a listen to this one. Every
Speaker 1: record I make comes with pressure. There's that expectation. How
Speaker 1: can you win if you only compete with yourself? Either
Speaker 1: way you lose. I sit in my room a lot
Speaker 1: these days. Dr Landy controls most things, but here late
Speaker 1: at night, I have some autonomy. I'm free for only
Speaker 1: a few hours. The silence is my companion, the darkness
Speaker 1: my only bedfellow. Sometimes I wonder what it would be
Speaker 1: like if I actually completely smile. What I'd be doing now?
Speaker 1: Would I be happy? Would I hear these voices? Who knows?
Speaker 1: It's the what if us that are hard to shake
Speaker 1: when I'm in here. Someone once told me that you
Speaker 1: shouldn't be asking what if. You should be asking what's next.
Speaker 1: But that's hard to do when all you've gotten. Rear views,
Speaker 1: Blood on the Tracks, Chapter nine, Brian Wilson's Free. I
Speaker 1: think of him when I see the tide going out,
Speaker 1: when it's moving. That's when I see him, handsome, assured, happy.
Speaker 1: It's strange you can go your whole life with a
Speaker 1: relationship to something and that can change almost overnight. Before
Speaker 1: he died, I would look at the ocean and feel nothing,
Speaker 1: no emotional connection, no jolt in my gut. But now
Speaker 1: all I see is his face. All I hear is
Speaker 1: his voice, and all I say is his name. Dennis
Speaker 1: recently I've been thinking about the album Dennis made. It's
Speaker 1: called Pacific Ocean Blue. I loved what he was doing
Speaker 1: on that album. My favorite song that he ever made
Speaker 1: was on that one You and I ever heard that.
Speaker 1: It's just beautiful. He was a great songwriter, a heartbreaker too.
Speaker 1: The girls loved him. Dennis was the only beach boy
Speaker 1: who knew how to serve. People always find that funny
Speaker 1: when I tell them that, but it's true. Dennis died
Speaker 1: when I was still under the glare of Dr Landy
Speaker 1: and his people. It was too much to take. The
Speaker 1: silence is my companion. We've been through so many tough times,
Speaker 1: even before the band, The Darkness my only bedfellow. When
Speaker 1: you get beat up as a kid by your dad,
Speaker 1: it turns you into something, not always the same thing.
Speaker 1: It turned me into one thing, Carl into another, and
Speaker 1: Dennis into something different. But it did change us. How
Speaker 1: could it not. When Dennis died, he'd been in and
Speaker 1: out of hospitals for drinking. He didn't want to stop drinking,
Speaker 1: or maybe he wanted to but couldn't. I don't know.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I wonder what it would be like either way.
Speaker 1: It caught up with him in the end. He would
Speaker 1: drink bottle after bottle of vodka, and he got into
Speaker 1: coke too. He walked right into that Fleetwood Mac twister
Speaker 1: of cocaine that was whirring around for a while and
Speaker 1: never came out of it. He got pretty caught up
Speaker 1: with Christine McVeigh during that time, and she even wrote
Speaker 1: that song about him. What's it called? Hold Me? That's it.
Speaker 1: I still can't listen to that song, not anymore. It's funny.
Speaker 1: Dennis was such a ladies man, and being a ladies
Speaker 1: man would kill him. Not in a literal sense, but
Speaker 1: it would kill him. It all started one day when
Speaker 1: he was on his boat, The Harmony. Dennis had just
Speaker 1: split from Karen, a woman he twice called his wife,
Speaker 1: and he was drinking, of course he was. He went
Speaker 1: down to the cabin and saw a silver picture frame
Speaker 1: that held their wedding picture. Dennis took a swig from
Speaker 1: his vodka bottle. Then he took the picture above deck
Speaker 1: and threw it as far as he could into the
Speaker 1: Pacific Ocean. I have some autonomy. He ran back down
Speaker 1: to the cabin and gathered everything that reminded him of
Speaker 1: Karen and threw them into the sea. Necklaces, sweaters, more photos.
Speaker 1: All of it went overboard free. Dennis fell asleep on
Speaker 1: the boat that night. He slept the best he had
Speaker 1: slept in months. I'm sure it was a cathartic moment,
Speaker 1: but it was the beginning of the end. Three years later,
Speaker 1: it's Christmas. He was still drinking. In fact, someone saw
Speaker 1: him drinking with a load of homeless guys downtown. Expectation.
Speaker 1: Dennis was a millionaire, but there he was, down on
Speaker 1: skid row. He'd been in and out of rehab too,
Speaker 1: the darkness, but now around Christmas, he was hanging out
Speaker 1: with his buddy Bill Oaster on his boat, partying with friends.
Speaker 1: Dennis had five bottles of vodka that day, along with
Speaker 1: who knows what else. I don't know why, but he
Speaker 1: was diving in the water almost constantly. Again and again
Speaker 1: he'd go in. Then at one point he surfaced with
Speaker 1: something in his hands. He started shouting at everyone on
Speaker 1: the boat. I can't fucking believe it, he yelled. He
Speaker 1: pulled himself on to the deck and showed everyone when
Speaker 1: he'd found that silver frame with his wedding photo, the
Speaker 1: same one he tossed into the ocean. He couldn't believe it.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I wonder what it would be like. He must
Speaker 1: have known it was down there, He must have been
Speaker 1: looking for it, hoping to find it. I don't know
Speaker 1: if he had missed Karen or what. Maybe he'd missed
Speaker 1: his old life, his old love. The two of them
Speaker 1: had a crazy relationship. But sometimes the past is a
Speaker 1: safe place. If it's already happened, you don't have to
Speaker 1: worry about it. Right would I be happy? I can
Speaker 1: see at safety in the past. Maybe that's what Dennis
Speaker 1: was looking for. Maybe he was trying to dive back
Speaker 1: into his past. Who after he found the wedding picture,
Speaker 1: he downed some more vodka, dove back in. Who knew
Speaker 1: what else he'd find down there? That are hard to shade.
Speaker 1: I remember the way Bill Oster described to me what
Speaker 1: happened next. It stayed with me, and it'll stay in
Speaker 1: here forever. I have no doubt about that. He said.
Speaker 1: He saw Dennis come up towards the surface, probably with
Speaker 1: about two ft to go before at the top, but
Speaker 1: then he dove back down, swam around behind the boat,
Speaker 1: out of Bill's view. He thought Dennis was playing a game,
Speaker 1: But by the time he finished his cigarette and walked
Speaker 1: around to the other side of the boat. All he
Speaker 1: saw was air bubbles, the silence. He was already gone.
Speaker 1: The silence is my companion. They found his body half
Speaker 1: an hour later. That's life. I guess if you're not careful,
Speaker 1: your present can be destroyed by your past. I missed
Speaker 1: him every day. At first I could barely carry on,
Speaker 1: but the band. The band did carry on without Dennis
Speaker 1: and for a while without me. I guess it was
Speaker 1: inevitable that I'd make a solo record. I mean that
Speaker 1: sounds came together like solo record, and that it was
Speaker 1: me writing and producing it. My first proper solo LP, however,
Speaker 1: came out on Sire Records. It's self titled Looking Back.
Speaker 1: I do like that record, even if I don't like
Speaker 1: the circumstances of making it. Every record I made it
Speaker 1: comes with pressure. It was a funny album. I suppose.
Speaker 1: Some songs were made from bits I had laying around.
Speaker 1: One came from an old baseline I had hung on
Speaker 1: too for years. You know, there are days when you
Speaker 1: go in the drawer and it all looks like a junk,
Speaker 1: And then there are other days when you find the
Speaker 1: exact right thing you need. Expectation. That's what songwriting is
Speaker 1: like sometimes. The song Love and Mercy came from that time,
Speaker 1: and it stayed with me ever since. It's become a mantra.
Speaker 1: I guess at that time in my life, Dr Landy
Speaker 1: was still keeping me from health, love and happiness. Dr
Speaker 1: Landing controls most things, and I needed Love and Mercy
Speaker 1: so badly. I wrote it in forty five minutes, kind
Speaker 1: of buzzed just sitting at the piano thinking of that
Speaker 1: bird back Iraq and Hal David's song What the World
Speaker 1: Needs Now is love. I don't know if I took
Speaker 1: musical cues from it or message cues, but I wanted
Speaker 1: to write a song about what the world needed, what
Speaker 1: my world needed. We made that album all over New York, Boston,
Speaker 1: l A. I was getting on a plane to go
Speaker 1: to Boston and I bumped into Van Dyke Parks at
Speaker 1: the airport. Where are you off to? I asked, It
Speaker 1: looked at me strangely, I'm coming back, he said, there's
Speaker 1: something I'm working on. I'm recording something. I don't know why,
Speaker 1: but I could tell something was up, something was wrong.
Speaker 1: Who knows. It's stuck with me on the entire flight
Speaker 1: It was all I thought about. What was he doing
Speaker 1: working on something new? You shouldn't be asking what if?
Speaker 1: My mind veered from saying I didn't give a fuck
Speaker 1: to crippling loneliness. I missed. My old friend Dr Landy
Speaker 1: sat next to me for the whole flight. Of course,
Speaker 1: he was listed as the producer for that solo debut album.
Speaker 1: He wrote lyrics that I would have to put into songs.
Speaker 1: He even wrote songs too. One was called Love Attack.
Speaker 1: It was not good. When we landed, Landy held my
Speaker 1: hand as we walked through the airport like I was
Speaker 1: his child. I was fully ready to start recording, but
Speaker 1: it turns out I would have to wait. I didn't
Speaker 1: realize it that day, but it kind of perfectly summed
Speaker 1: up what was going on at that point with my
Speaker 1: life and career. You see, while I'm in the air
Speaker 1: over here going to Boston, you have the Beach Boys
Speaker 1: over here recording in LA. They were late and telling
Speaker 1: me that they were recording at all right before they
Speaker 1: had the session booked. It's too late for me to attend,
Speaker 1: not that I would have anyway, because I have my
Speaker 1: solo record to worry about, and I do mean worry
Speaker 1: In l A, the boys sit in the control booth
Speaker 1: the two microphones set up in the studio in Boston.
Speaker 1: Dr Landy can see him feeling anxious, so he tells
Speaker 1: me to whisper I love you to myself three times
Speaker 1: as we walked through the airport. He used to make
Speaker 1: me do that a lot. In l A, the Boys
Speaker 1: and their producer Terry Melcher sitting around listening to an
Speaker 1: instrumental cut of the song Kokomo. Everyone is smiling. Mike
Speaker 1: collapse his hands together and says, okay, I think we're
Speaker 1: ready at the airport. It feels like we've been walking
Speaker 1: for miles, but then we finally see it. There's a
Speaker 1: man dressed smartly and he holds up a sign that
Speaker 1: reads Mr Eugene lay me in the studio. The boys
Speaker 1: all waved through the glass to a man who has
Speaker 1: just walked into the studio. It's Van Dyke Parks. He
Speaker 1: smiles back at the boys and takes his place in
Speaker 1: front of the microphone. As we exit the terminal building,
Speaker 1: Dr Landy suddenly explodes what the fund is that he screams.
Speaker 1: At first, I think it's me he's addressing, but then
Speaker 1: I see what he's looking at in l A, Mike
Speaker 1: Love chats to Van Dyke, who lightly fingers his accordion. Okay,
Speaker 1: when you're ready, take it away, he says. The big
Speaker 1: red light goes on. In Boston. Dr Landy is standing
Speaker 1: looking at a Lincoln town Car. He's furious this isn't
Speaker 1: the stretch limo he requested. The driver tells us it's
Speaker 1: what the record company sent over. Landy doesn't care. He
Speaker 1: kicks the door in a rage, shouting that this is
Speaker 1: no way to travel when you're a genius. I think
Speaker 1: he means me, but he could be talking about himself,
Speaker 1: just shouting in l A too. But it's Mike Love
Speaker 1: shouting great job to Van Dyke, who has just laid
Speaker 1: down his accordion part for the song Kokomo. Everyone in
Speaker 1: the booth is clapping as he comes into the room.
Speaker 1: In Boston, Dr Landy sarcastically claps as the driver tells
Speaker 1: him this is the only available car. He looks at
Speaker 1: it calls it a piece of ship. I look at
Speaker 1: my watch and sigh. In l A. They listen to
Speaker 1: the playback and al Jardine turns to Van Dyke and smiles.
Speaker 1: One take, he says, they all laugh. They know they've
Speaker 1: just cut a hit in Boston. It's a hit of
Speaker 1: another kind. I'm worried about. Dr Landy is angrier than ever.
Speaker 1: He turns to me and says, are you going to
Speaker 1: take this, Brian? Tell the man what kind of car
Speaker 1: you want to travel in? Tell the man which car
Speaker 1: a rock star travels in. I'm fed up, tired of
Speaker 1: all this ship, tired of the conflict, constant battles, the
Speaker 1: battles with Dr Landy, the voices in my head, the band, everyone.
Speaker 1: I just want to be free, to be with Melinda,
Speaker 1: to make music, but that all seems so far away.
Speaker 1: I'm here to record an album, but we're worrying about
Speaker 1: a fucking car. I look at him helplessly. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I say, a Cadillac Melinda is all I can think about.
Speaker 1: Dr Landy's eyes flicker. Forget it, he moans, and he
Speaker 1: violently throws open the car door. We got to the
Speaker 1: studio two hours late. I don't remember what we recorded
Speaker 1: that day, but it wasn't anything memorable. Dr Landy was
Speaker 1: in the studio the whole time. It was frustrating. In fact,
Speaker 1: the engineers used to make up things to get him
Speaker 1: out of the room so we could actually work in
Speaker 1: l A. The Beach Boy has cut their first number
Speaker 1: one single in nearly twenty years. That day, I thought
Speaker 1: my solo album would get you back to where I
Speaker 1: wanted to be. But it didn't. That album didn't do it,
Speaker 1: but there was an album that would. And it all
Speaker 1: started one Christmas. We'll be right back after this we
Speaker 1: were once again. It's a very merry Christmas from all
Speaker 1: of us here at one oh five point four b
Speaker 1: R I A n f M. Happy holidays everyone. I
Speaker 1: don't know about you, but the one thing I want
Speaker 1: for Christmas is a little dr Lindy left the scene
Speaker 1: by the time my solo career kicked into gear. I
Speaker 1: can't lie and say I didn't miss him, because I did.
Speaker 1: Someone told me it was Stockholm syndrome, which I disagreed with.
Speaker 1: That's too simplistic. He did some terrible things, but he
Speaker 1: helped me too, and I did miss him after he went.
Speaker 1: After he was forced to go. After that debut album,
Speaker 1: I made a few more records. I finished a record
Speaker 1: called Imagination, which I could talk about all day, but
Speaker 1: I don't want to open that door today. Every album
Speaker 1: I made, Smile was in there somewhere, lurking in the background.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I
Speaker 1: actually completely smile. I heard it as I moved the
Speaker 1: faders on a mixing desk. I saw it in every
Speaker 1: artwork pressing. I felt it in a glaring reflection of
Speaker 1: every CD. It wasn't always overt, sometimes it was just there.
Speaker 1: I could just sense it, like a low level hum.
Speaker 1: How can you win if you only compete with yourself?
Speaker 1: Have you over sat in silence and listened and heard
Speaker 1: that slight ringing, that sound of silence that's always there.
Speaker 1: Once you hear it, you can't help but notice it.
Speaker 1: It can be overrun by other sounds and voices, but
Speaker 1: it's always there underneath it all. That's what smile was like.
Speaker 1: Some days I opened up a door in my mind
Speaker 1: thinking back to my childhood and hawthorn, and all of
Speaker 1: a sudden, smile would creep into my consciousness, even if
Speaker 1: it wasn't connected. Would I be happy? Other Times I'd
Speaker 1: be thinking of something mundane, like what I should have
Speaker 1: on my sandwich for lunch, and all of a sudden
Speaker 1: I'd hear a smile melody of flashback to a session
Speaker 1: in my mind for no reason would I hear these voices.
Speaker 1: I tried to ignore these feelings or images, but there
Speaker 1: came a time where they would spill out into the world.
Speaker 1: I'd find myself humming our prayer while I walked around
Speaker 1: the house, or if I was fiddling around with a keyboard,
Speaker 1: I had all of a sudden find I'd programmed it
Speaker 1: to sound like the Good Vibrations organ. By the time
Speaker 1: Imagination came out, I was much more settled as a person.
Speaker 1: Dr Landy had stopped me from seeing Melinda, but since
Speaker 1: he was long gone, we reconnected and ended up getting married.
Speaker 1: With these apparitions of smile becoming more common, I thought
Speaker 1: I was going backwards again, starting to slip and slide
Speaker 1: back to the old days. It got really bad. One Christmas.
Speaker 1: I started to go back further. I kept thinking about
Speaker 1: being on that plane all those years ago, about having
Speaker 1: that breakdown. I couldn't bear to do that again, not
Speaker 1: for me, not from Melinda. It filled me with such dread.
Speaker 1: I was scared, scared about the future all over again.
Speaker 1: It felt like everything was falling apart again. I knew
Speaker 1: something was going to happen. One night, we were heading
Speaker 1: to a Christmas party that my keyboard is Scott Bennett's house.
Speaker 1: I didn't want to go. My head was spinning. All
Speaker 1: those old voices were flying around. A Christmas gift for you, Brian.
Speaker 1: In the car on the way over, Welinda turned the
Speaker 1: radio on, and White Christmas by Darlene Love came on
Speaker 1: from that Phil Specter Christmas record. I quickly flicked the
Speaker 1: switch off. What's gotten into you? She asked, worried you
Speaker 1: haven't gotten me the right present. She laughed, but I
Speaker 1: could tell she was worried. She had been worried for
Speaker 1: a few weeks. I just slumped against the passenger window,
Speaker 1: my head against the cold glass. I just don't like
Speaker 1: that song, I said, at least I think I did.
Speaker 1: I may have just said it in my head. I
Speaker 1: don't know. Sometimes I wonder. When we arrived at Scott's house,
Speaker 1: it was hot. There was a sea of bodies inside, laughing, drinking,
Speaker 1: telling stories. It's not my favorite situation to be in
Speaker 1: these days, but Melinda she thrives in situations like that.
Speaker 1: I watched her glide around the room, throwing witty lines
Speaker 1: at some people, these little waves across the room at others.
Speaker 1: The silence is my companion. She's almost a professional at it.
Speaker 1: We all ended up in Scott's large living room. The
Speaker 1: lights seemed so brightened there the darkness my only bedfellow.
Speaker 1: The drinks have been flowing for some time at this point,
Speaker 1: so the chatter was louder than usual. I remember someone
Speaker 1: saying it's time for a song, and so we all
Speaker 1: huddled around Scott's baby grand He took us through Winter
Speaker 1: Wonderland and Oh Tann and Bomb and when they played
Speaker 1: White Christmas, we Linda squeezed my hand. Phil Spector's face
Speaker 1: flashed across my mind. Every everyone clapped as I started
Speaker 1: to think about leaving, and then Scott looked directly at
Speaker 1: me and said, do you want to play us something? Brian?
Speaker 1: I froze. The partygoers seemed to all speak as one. Yeah,
Speaker 1: someone shouting come on, Brian said another. I shook my
Speaker 1: head expectation, Brian, Brian. They all began to chant. Well.
Speaker 1: Linda looked at me. She knew I was anxious. She
Speaker 1: began to tell the crowd that I just wasn't in
Speaker 1: the mood for that. But suddenly I jumped in. I
Speaker 1: don't know why, but I felt something, a freedom, a
Speaker 1: sense that I could do what I wanted. Why not?
Speaker 1: I felt safe here in this room with Scott and Melinda.
Speaker 1: I felt like there was no judgment. I could play something.
Speaker 1: I yelled, half excited, half nervous. It seemed to take
Speaker 1: an age to get to the piano with all those
Speaker 1: eyes to me, I didn't know what to play. I
Speaker 1: closed my eyes and everything seemed to melt away. My
Speaker 1: hand felt like it was being moved by someone else,
Speaker 1: by something else. I hit an E flat, and then
Speaker 1: a G and then a B flat. I didn't know
Speaker 1: what I was doing at first, and then I recognized it.
Speaker 1: There was my song, Heroes and Villains. My stomach lurched
Speaker 1: forward as my mind flashed back to Van Dyke turning
Speaker 1: up at my house all those years ago, with that policeman,
Speaker 1: the schoolboy smile, the angry face of the officer. Then
Speaker 1: I thought about how we sat and wrote the lyrics
Speaker 1: for that song around my pool that night. I felt
Speaker 1: a wave of fear creep over me as I remembered
Speaker 1: how the single flopped faces of the people at the
Speaker 1: record company, Mike Love's bitter look and Carl's arm around
Speaker 1: my shoulder. How can you win if you only compete
Speaker 1: with yourself. I started to panic, so I opened my eyes.
Speaker 1: I was back in the room at Scott's house. The
Speaker 1: people at the party were all looking at me, grinning.
Speaker 1: I realized then that it didn't matter. That song didn't
Speaker 1: control me, that album didn't control me. I controlled me.
Speaker 1: I drew in a breath and sang the opening line
Speaker 1: to the song. I was worried that no one would
Speaker 1: sing along, but everyone joined in and we sang it
Speaker 1: from start to finish. But Linda hugged me afterwards and
Speaker 1: whispered in my ear, why did you play that? I
Speaker 1: told her I didn't know. It just came to me.
Speaker 1: When we got home later that night, Melinda went to bed,
Speaker 1: but I went to sit at the piano. I played
Speaker 1: Heroes and Villains all the way through again. After I finished,
Speaker 1: I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, and
Speaker 1: I smiled. Roy Simmons sits in his office at the
Speaker 1: Martin Cadillac dealership in Los Angeles. He polishes his black
Speaker 1: dress shoes as he does every morning, even though it
Speaker 1: isn't company policy, it's routine left over from Roy's military days.
Speaker 1: He doesn't serve anymore, but he treats his job as
Speaker 1: a car salesman, just as seriously as he did his
Speaker 1: time in the military. Suddenly there's a flash from out
Speaker 1: of the main showroom of the dealership. But is it
Speaker 1: that keeps catching his eye? He thought he was imagining
Speaker 1: it earlier, but he definitely saw something this time, not
Speaker 1: the morning sun, something else, a car's headlights. He jumps
Speaker 1: up from his chair and walks over to the window
Speaker 1: of his office. Sickis hum of you at the whole showroom.
Speaker 1: Sure enough, the latest model, a Seville and sky Blue
Speaker 1: is sitting in the middle of the showroom with the
Speaker 1: slights going on and off. He walks back to his
Speaker 1: desk to sit down, but quickly changes his mind. He
Speaker 1: grabs the Seville's master key and walks out to the showroom.
Speaker 1: Moments later, he's opening the cars door. As he does,
Speaker 1: his blood runs cold. Five minutes earlier, Melinda Leadbetter brushes
Speaker 1: her hair carefully while gazing into the passenger side mirror
Speaker 1: of that same Seville. Today is a big day. A
Speaker 1: new car means a new selling point. It's not just
Speaker 1: a car, it's a car that other people don't have yet.
Speaker 1: Melinda likes to give her clients the feeling that they're
Speaker 1: getting something that your average Joe isn't getting. She doesn't
Speaker 1: sell new cars. She sells a key to a v
Speaker 1: I P Room, a headstar, a moment of exclusivity. At
Speaker 1: least that's what she tells him. In reality, every Cadillac
Speaker 1: dealership on the West Coast test the new Sevilles, not
Speaker 1: that she would ever say that these Sevilles, well, these
Speaker 1: are fresh off the line, sitting in the showroom a
Speaker 1: day or two before they're available anywhere else. The sky
Speaker 1: blue Seville she stands next to is spotless. It glows
Speaker 1: in the l a morning sunshine. She climbs inside the
Speaker 1: passenger seat and closes the door and sits for a
Speaker 1: moment in silence. She always thinks about Brian Wilson every
Speaker 1: time she sits in a car in the showroom, That
Speaker 1: time they sat in a car together on a day
Speaker 1: that wasn't that long ago. She replays their first meeting
Speaker 1: in her head. Then she checks the clock on the
Speaker 1: dash nine oh four am. Suddenly the back door of
Speaker 1: the car opens. Melinda assumes it's her co worker Roy
Speaker 1: coming to take a look at the new model with her,
Speaker 1: but she's wrong. She sees the man in the rear
Speaker 1: view mirror, just as he pulls his forearm across her throat,
Speaker 1: and she knows exactly who this is. His name is
Speaker 1: Dr Eugene Landy. I got your letter, he spits into
Speaker 1: her ear as he tightens his grip. He throws the
Speaker 1: letter under the seat next to her. She sees Carl
Speaker 1: Wilson's name at the bottom of it, along with phrases
Speaker 1: like unfit for practice, bullying in harassment in California law.
Speaker 1: She smiles, despite the fact that she's trying to grasp
Speaker 1: for air, knowing that the man she loves is almost free,
Speaker 1: even if she isn't. They're taking my fucking license away,
Speaker 1: he says, his arm getting even tighter. You think you've won,
Speaker 1: do you? You're gonna bleed him dry too, Are you
Speaker 1: fucking slut? You're a fucking sales girl. He's a genius.
Speaker 1: You're not meant to be part of his world. My world,
Speaker 1: His words stuttered with a broken cadence that is lost
Speaker 1: to his. Sheer anger up here, a white hot rage
Speaker 1: she's never seen before, and that's when it hits her.
Speaker 1: He could kill her. He could kill her right now,
Speaker 1: right here in the Seville. He never really scared her
Speaker 1: like this before, but now she can feel it. She
Speaker 1: panics as she remembers the accusation of sexual misconduct that,
Speaker 1: along with Brian's brother Carl, she brought to the attention
Speaker 1: of the authorities. Her heart pumps faster and faster as
Speaker 1: Landy continues, Well, Melinda, he says, I'm gonna fight you
Speaker 1: so fucking hard. By the end, will be more messed
Speaker 1: up than that fucking whack job used to call a boyfriend.
Speaker 1: Her oxygen reserves are low now she can feel it.
Speaker 1: Her head begins to ache as the blood drains from
Speaker 1: her face, her eyes drooped as Landy's words start to fade.
Speaker 1: Then the edges of her vision begin to go white
Speaker 1: and distort it. She tries to kick and hit with
Speaker 1: her hands and legs, but it's no use. He's in
Speaker 1: the perfect position in the back seat. She can't get
Speaker 1: anywhere near him. And then she has the idea. She
Speaker 1: pulls her knee up and flicks the lights of the
Speaker 1: car on, then off, on, and then off again, and
Speaker 1: the headlights light up the show room and the giant
Speaker 1: doors ahead, doors that she and Brian Wilson had driven
Speaker 1: through on that rainy l a day on off, on off,
Speaker 1: and then her body goes limp and Landy stops. Fuck
Speaker 1: may have gone too far. He thinks he's about to
Speaker 1: pull his arms away when he hears the car unlock
Speaker 1: and first to front and then the back door is open.
Speaker 1: A man grabs his arms and removes them from Melinda's neck.
Speaker 1: Landy is pulled from the car and toss like a
Speaker 1: paper cup onto the hard show floor. He crashes against
Speaker 1: the polished surface and lies there for a second, not moving.
Speaker 1: He's relieved when he hears Melinda gasping for air and
Speaker 1: talking to the man in front of him. His relief
Speaker 1: disappears as the man turns around and walks towards the
Speaker 1: former doctor slowly. Landy closes his eyes as Roy Simmons
Speaker 1: draws his foot back and places that military grade polished
Speaker 1: shoe right into Landy's stomach. Roy knows from his previous
Speaker 1: life that's the place where the bruises show the least,
Speaker 1: and he does it again and again, and then a
Speaker 1: final time, and Landy hears the contents of his stomach
Speaker 1: slash around amongst the pain. He knows it's the sound
Speaker 1: of come up. It's it's the sound of ut on
Speaker 1: the Tracks. Blood on the Tracks produced by Double Elvis
Speaker 1: in partnership with I Heart Radio. It's hosted an executive
Speaker 1: produced by me Jake Brennan, also executive produced by Brady Sadly.
Speaker 1: Zeth Lundy is lead editor and producer. This episode was
Speaker 1: written by Ben Burro, mixing and sound designed by Colin Fleming.
Speaker 1: Additional music and score elements by Ryan Spraaker. This season
Speaker 1: features Chris Anzaloni as the voice of Brian Wilson. Sources
Speaker 1: for this episode are available at Double Elvis dot com
Speaker 1: on the Blood on the Tracks series page. Follow Double
Speaker 1: Elvis on Instagram at double Elvis and on Twitch at
Speaker 1: s grayson and Talks, and you can talk to me
Speaker 1: per Usual on Instagram and Twitter at Disgrace Land Pond,
Speaker 1: Rock and Roll, d Graves our dand