1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:03,600 Speaker 1: Compassion. It's not something you do for other people that's 2 00:00:03,640 --> 00:00:07,400 Speaker 1: a great side effect. Compassion is something you do for yourself. 3 00:00:07,400 --> 00:00:10,400 Speaker 1: It changes the way you function and show what in 4 00:00:10,440 --> 00:00:20,560 Speaker 1: the world. So hey everyone, welcome back to the number 5 00:00:20,560 --> 00:00:23,479 Speaker 1: one health podcast in the world. Thanks to each and 6 00:00:23,520 --> 00:00:26,760 Speaker 1: every one of you that come back every week to listen, learn, 7 00:00:26,880 --> 00:00:29,880 Speaker 1: and grow. And I am so excited to be talking 8 00:00:29,880 --> 00:00:32,960 Speaker 1: to you today. I can't believe it. My new book 9 00:00:33,080 --> 00:00:36,960 Speaker 1: Eight Rules of Love is out and I cannot wait 10 00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:40,120 Speaker 1: to share it with you. I am so excited for 11 00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:42,120 Speaker 1: you to read this book, for you to listen to 12 00:00:42,159 --> 00:00:44,640 Speaker 1: this book. I read the audiobook. If you haven't got 13 00:00:44,640 --> 00:00:47,479 Speaker 1: it already, make sure you go to eight Rules of 14 00:00:47,600 --> 00:00:52,560 Speaker 1: Love dot com. It's dedicated to anyone who's trying to find, keep, 15 00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:55,120 Speaker 1: or let go of love. So if you've got friends 16 00:00:55,160 --> 00:00:58,480 Speaker 1: that are dating, broken up, or struggling with love, make 17 00:00:58,520 --> 00:01:01,080 Speaker 1: sure you grab this book. And I'd love to invite 18 00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:03,680 Speaker 1: you to come and see me for my global tour 19 00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:07,959 Speaker 1: Love Rules. Go to jasdytour dot com to learn more 20 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:12,880 Speaker 1: information about tickets, VIP experiences, and more. I can't wait 21 00:01:12,880 --> 00:01:14,800 Speaker 1: to see you this year, and you know that I 22 00:01:14,880 --> 00:01:18,600 Speaker 1: love introducing you to thinkers, leaders, people who can inspire 23 00:01:18,720 --> 00:01:23,039 Speaker 1: you to change your daily habits and make shifts, small 24 00:01:23,160 --> 00:01:27,160 Speaker 1: shifts that make big differences in your daily lives. Now, 25 00:01:27,160 --> 00:01:28,920 Speaker 1: today I'm talking to a guest who's already been on 26 00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:31,119 Speaker 1: the podcast before. He's a favorite here. I know you 27 00:01:31,480 --> 00:01:34,120 Speaker 1: enjoy listening to him, and some of the videos that 28 00:01:34,160 --> 00:01:36,320 Speaker 1: we've done together when I've been speaking on his platform 29 00:01:36,319 --> 00:01:39,000 Speaker 1: and he's been here, have gone absolutely viral, So I 30 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:41,240 Speaker 1: know you're excited for this one. I'm talking about the 31 00:01:41,400 --> 00:01:45,119 Speaker 1: one and only Vision Lakiani. Now. Vision created mind Valley, 32 00:01:45,280 --> 00:01:48,520 Speaker 1: one of the world's most powerful life transformation platforms that 33 00:01:48,680 --> 00:01:52,320 Speaker 1: now has a following of twenty million people across one 34 00:01:52,400 --> 00:01:56,280 Speaker 1: hundred and ninety five countries. And today we're talking about 35 00:01:56,280 --> 00:02:00,639 Speaker 1: his brand new book called The Six Phase Meditation Method. 36 00:02:00,960 --> 00:02:02,480 Speaker 1: And for those of you want to know how much 37 00:02:02,520 --> 00:02:04,880 Speaker 1: I love and endorse this book and this human I 38 00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:07,400 Speaker 1: have a testimonial right on the back of the book. 39 00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:11,120 Speaker 1: This book is a practice. It's not just a book 40 00:02:11,120 --> 00:02:12,680 Speaker 1: that you'll read, it's not just a book that will 41 00:02:12,720 --> 00:02:14,440 Speaker 1: sit on your shelf. It's a book that you will 42 00:02:14,480 --> 00:02:17,400 Speaker 1: actually implement that will shift the way you think about 43 00:02:17,440 --> 00:02:20,960 Speaker 1: meditation and the way you think. Welcome to the podcast 44 00:02:21,320 --> 00:02:25,880 Speaker 1: Vision Lackiani Vision. Thank you Jan back here. I love 45 00:02:25,960 --> 00:02:28,120 Speaker 1: the new podcast set up. I love your new place. 46 00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:30,920 Speaker 1: This is amazing. Well, I love seeing you grow and 47 00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:33,440 Speaker 1: grow and grow. Oh well, it's such an honor because 48 00:02:33,760 --> 00:02:36,720 Speaker 1: I've had so much fun with you at multiple mind 49 00:02:36,800 --> 00:02:40,240 Speaker 1: Value events, whether we were in Italy, Sardinia, whether we 50 00:02:40,240 --> 00:02:42,919 Speaker 1: were in La where we did so many events together. 51 00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:46,239 Speaker 1: I mean, I think the community that you've cultivated in 52 00:02:46,320 --> 00:02:49,040 Speaker 1: mind Value is so special. Yeah, and the people that 53 00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:51,800 Speaker 1: are so special. And whenever I'm there, I feel so 54 00:02:51,880 --> 00:02:55,280 Speaker 1: much love. I feel so much genuine sincerity to grow. 55 00:02:55,720 --> 00:02:58,040 Speaker 1: And my community here loves you to your own poets. 56 00:02:58,120 --> 00:03:00,600 Speaker 1: And can I appreciate you for one thing. Many people 57 00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:02,920 Speaker 1: don't know this about you, and maybe you don't know 58 00:03:02,960 --> 00:03:04,960 Speaker 1: this about you as well. But when I first met 59 00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:08,240 Speaker 1: you in twenty eighteen in Sardinia, you were speaking at 60 00:03:08,280 --> 00:03:10,720 Speaker 1: one of my events. I was not on Instagram, I 61 00:03:10,760 --> 00:03:13,919 Speaker 1: was not on social media at all. I felt I 62 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:18,200 Speaker 1: was too old, I didn't know. I felt imposter syndrome, 63 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:20,680 Speaker 1: I felt I don't know anything. I felt I'm too old, 64 00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:22,799 Speaker 1: and you were the person who convinced me to get 65 00:03:22,840 --> 00:03:24,720 Speaker 1: on Instagram. I didn't know that. You didn't know that. 66 00:03:24,760 --> 00:03:27,840 Speaker 1: But before then I used Instagram just to share. I 67 00:03:27,919 --> 00:03:30,200 Speaker 1: used Instagram as a gratitude wall. I would share pictures 68 00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:32,640 Speaker 1: of things I was grateful for, never for an audience, 69 00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:36,520 Speaker 1: and you showed me that it was possible. My Instagram 70 00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:38,840 Speaker 1: blew up. It's now like eight hundred thousand people at 71 00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:43,840 Speaker 1: Vision and now I use it to curate this community 72 00:03:43,840 --> 00:03:46,400 Speaker 1: and to talk about my discoveries and personal group. But 73 00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:48,720 Speaker 1: you were the person who inspired me to get on. Well, 74 00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:50,880 Speaker 1: thank you man. I had no idea. That's that's beautiful. 75 00:03:51,200 --> 00:03:52,960 Speaker 1: I'm happy for the world that you did get on. 76 00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:56,960 Speaker 1: My first inspirational Instagram post happened one week after we spoke. 77 00:03:56,960 --> 00:03:58,840 Speaker 1: And you don't even remember this, but we spoke over dinner. 78 00:03:59,040 --> 00:04:02,200 Speaker 1: Yeah I remember. I've remembered all our meetings. But I 79 00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:04,400 Speaker 1: think what you've done with mind value, what you've done 80 00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:06,520 Speaker 1: with your work, has been incredible. Today. I want to 81 00:04:06,560 --> 00:04:08,000 Speaker 1: dive into parts of this book, but I want to 82 00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:12,320 Speaker 1: dive into it with your experience, because I think everyone 83 00:04:12,800 --> 00:04:15,880 Speaker 1: can remember or has a distinct memory of their first 84 00:04:15,960 --> 00:04:20,200 Speaker 1: meditation experience. What was your first meditation experience ever? Do 85 00:04:20,200 --> 00:04:22,160 Speaker 1: you remember it? Like the first time you were ever 86 00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:25,279 Speaker 1: introduced to any form of meditation. So the first time 87 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:28,240 Speaker 1: it happened to me, I was fourteen years old. I 88 00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:32,280 Speaker 1: was a young kid in Malaysia, and I decided to 89 00:04:32,320 --> 00:04:34,880 Speaker 1: try a form of meditation that I learned from a 90 00:04:34,920 --> 00:04:37,799 Speaker 1: book called The Silver Method, a really old nineteen sixties 91 00:04:37,880 --> 00:04:42,000 Speaker 1: nineteen seventies book. Back then, I was fourteen, so must 92 00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:45,120 Speaker 1: have been like nineteen ninety. There was no internet in Malaysia. 93 00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:47,960 Speaker 1: We had four television channels, so really to pass the 94 00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:50,280 Speaker 1: time by, all I did was I would browse all 95 00:04:50,279 --> 00:04:53,200 Speaker 1: of the books on my father's bookshelf, and I discovered 96 00:04:53,200 --> 00:04:55,960 Speaker 1: this book called the Silver Method. Now, the book captivated 97 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:58,320 Speaker 1: me because it spoke about how the mind can heal 98 00:04:58,360 --> 00:05:00,840 Speaker 1: the body. What was happening with me back then, as 99 00:05:01,520 --> 00:05:04,880 Speaker 1: I was having a really horrible skin problem. My face 100 00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:07,400 Speaker 1: was covered in acne. I had very little confidence. I 101 00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:10,920 Speaker 1: considered myself ugly. I had difficulty making friends at school. 102 00:05:11,440 --> 00:05:13,320 Speaker 1: You know, even if I liked a girl, I had 103 00:05:13,360 --> 00:05:15,840 Speaker 1: no confidence to even talk to her. And so when 104 00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:17,960 Speaker 1: I read in this book that the mind can heal 105 00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:20,440 Speaker 1: the skin, I was game off. I want to figure 106 00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:25,120 Speaker 1: this out. So I tried practicing, nothing happened. I continued practicing, 107 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:28,920 Speaker 1: nothing happened, and there was very little results. But I 108 00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:32,560 Speaker 1: read and reread and reread that book over and over 109 00:05:32,640 --> 00:05:35,159 Speaker 1: and over and over again. Then I started picking other books, 110 00:05:35,160 --> 00:05:38,800 Speaker 1: from Bob Proctor, from A Wayne Dyer. I started reading 111 00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:42,159 Speaker 1: this books. It became a passion, and slowly things began 112 00:05:42,240 --> 00:05:46,160 Speaker 1: to click, and one day applying the Silver Method. At 113 00:05:46,160 --> 00:05:48,719 Speaker 1: this point I was seventeen years old. Things had finally 114 00:05:48,760 --> 00:05:51,080 Speaker 1: started clicking. I began to understand it's not just about 115 00:05:51,279 --> 00:05:54,239 Speaker 1: hoping and wanting your skin to heal. There was a process, 116 00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:56,880 Speaker 1: there was a method, there was a psychology. When it clicked, 117 00:05:57,160 --> 00:06:00,279 Speaker 1: in five weeks, I completely healed my skin. Five of 118 00:06:00,279 --> 00:06:04,599 Speaker 1: skin disease healed in five weeks. Today science talk about 119 00:06:04,600 --> 00:06:06,960 Speaker 1: this as a thing. It's called psychodematology, how your mind 120 00:06:06,960 --> 00:06:10,200 Speaker 1: influences your skin. But that was my first evidence that 121 00:06:10,240 --> 00:06:13,440 Speaker 1: we can use our minds to influence our bodies. Now, 122 00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:15,560 Speaker 1: the next thing I did was I decided to see 123 00:06:15,600 --> 00:06:17,680 Speaker 1: can I use my mind to accomplish a really big 124 00:06:17,720 --> 00:06:21,599 Speaker 1: goal for me? That was qualifying for the US Open 125 00:06:21,920 --> 00:06:25,960 Speaker 1: Taekwondo Championships. Takwondo was Korean karate I was really into it, 126 00:06:26,320 --> 00:06:28,599 Speaker 1: and I managed to qualify my first ever trip to 127 00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:31,719 Speaker 1: the United States, which was my dreamland. Since I was 128 00:06:32,080 --> 00:06:34,880 Speaker 1: like a kid, I wanted to go to America. My 129 00:06:34,920 --> 00:06:37,920 Speaker 1: first ever trip was to the US Open to represent 130 00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:41,200 Speaker 1: my country. It was in Colorado Springs in nineteen ninety three, 131 00:06:41,320 --> 00:06:43,160 Speaker 1: my first time I fell in love with America. But 132 00:06:43,200 --> 00:06:46,479 Speaker 1: it became because I visualized that in my mind, and 133 00:06:46,560 --> 00:06:49,919 Speaker 1: that was my beginning, the beginning of my fascination with 134 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:52,040 Speaker 1: the human mind that would later lead to me starting 135 00:06:52,080 --> 00:06:55,800 Speaker 1: Mind Value and writing this book. That's amazing. I love 136 00:06:55,839 --> 00:06:59,880 Speaker 1: that story for so many reasons. He because, well, let 137 00:06:59,880 --> 00:07:01,800 Speaker 1: me just break this down for everyone. You had an 138 00:07:01,839 --> 00:07:04,159 Speaker 1: intention that was very clear, even if it was to 139 00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:06,520 Speaker 1: save your skin or to impress a girl or whatever 140 00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:09,120 Speaker 1: it was, you were clear of why you wanted to meditate. 141 00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:11,600 Speaker 1: The second thing was you were happy to read the 142 00:07:11,600 --> 00:07:13,800 Speaker 1: book again and again and again again and again. And 143 00:07:13,840 --> 00:07:16,440 Speaker 1: I think that takes a lot of resilience because most 144 00:07:16,480 --> 00:07:18,480 Speaker 1: of us, when we try something once and it doesn't work, 145 00:07:18,760 --> 00:07:21,680 Speaker 1: we give up. And the third thing is you didn't 146 00:07:21,680 --> 00:07:24,239 Speaker 1: just test on something small. Once you saw a small result, 147 00:07:24,320 --> 00:07:26,560 Speaker 1: you're like, well, does this apply to something bigger, and 148 00:07:26,600 --> 00:07:29,360 Speaker 1: I think those three lessons in and of themselves are 149 00:07:29,400 --> 00:07:33,560 Speaker 1: so powerful. What has changed in the benefits to you 150 00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:36,000 Speaker 1: of meditation today? At that time, it was solving your skin, 151 00:07:36,320 --> 00:07:39,960 Speaker 1: it was getting focused around the taekwondo championships. How do 152 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:42,840 Speaker 1: you view meditation like? What is its use in your 153 00:07:42,840 --> 00:07:45,600 Speaker 1: life today? Because I feel like so many people keep 154 00:07:45,640 --> 00:07:48,400 Speaker 1: telling us to meditate and there's so many benefits, but 155 00:07:48,440 --> 00:07:51,080 Speaker 1: for you personally, what's the reason. So I grew up 156 00:07:51,080 --> 00:07:54,280 Speaker 1: in a Hindu family in Malaysia, meditation was never what 157 00:07:54,360 --> 00:07:56,960 Speaker 1: I was thought. The style of Hinduism I was thought 158 00:07:57,000 --> 00:08:00,520 Speaker 1: was very dogmatic. You had prayers, you had chance, you 159 00:08:00,600 --> 00:08:03,760 Speaker 1: had mantras, and I found it, Oh God, so boring 160 00:08:03,840 --> 00:08:07,360 Speaker 1: and irritating. I hated being dragged to temple to listen 161 00:08:07,360 --> 00:08:10,520 Speaker 1: to a pre speak in sanskrita language I didn't even understand. 162 00:08:10,840 --> 00:08:13,760 Speaker 1: So when I was nineteen, I gave up Hinduism. I 163 00:08:13,800 --> 00:08:16,160 Speaker 1: decided the religion was not for me. I read a 164 00:08:16,240 --> 00:08:19,160 Speaker 1: quote by Gandhi that said, I'm a Hindu and I'm 165 00:08:19,160 --> 00:08:21,080 Speaker 1: a Muslim, and I'm a Christian, and I'm a Jew 166 00:08:21,120 --> 00:08:23,160 Speaker 1: and I'm a Buddhist, and I thought that's it. I 167 00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:26,520 Speaker 1: want to study and unite ideas from all of these 168 00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:30,480 Speaker 1: different spiritual practices. And so that was my beginning. I 169 00:08:30,520 --> 00:08:35,080 Speaker 1: got obsessed with spirituality. I started reading books by Esther Hicks, 170 00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:38,880 Speaker 1: by Neil Donald Walsh, and I became particularly captivated by 171 00:08:38,880 --> 00:08:42,680 Speaker 1: the spirituality that was emerging from the United States, from 172 00:08:42,720 --> 00:08:46,080 Speaker 1: everyone from Paramahansa Yogananda, who was an Indian who crossed 173 00:08:46,120 --> 00:08:50,160 Speaker 1: over over here, to Neil Donald Wals who especially Jose Silva. 174 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:52,719 Speaker 1: Now a lot of them spoke about spirituality. What made 175 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:55,760 Speaker 1: Jose Silva's work different was that he broke it down 176 00:08:55,800 --> 00:09:00,600 Speaker 1: into actionable steps, and that's what fascinated me more so. 177 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:03,240 Speaker 1: A lot of people spoke about meditation, about sitting still, 178 00:09:03,280 --> 00:09:06,200 Speaker 1: about going within. Jose Silver would teach the method you're 179 00:09:06,240 --> 00:09:08,240 Speaker 1: going to do, this method to reduce your brain wave 180 00:09:08,320 --> 00:09:11,200 Speaker 1: frequency to the alpha level, this method together down to 181 00:09:11,240 --> 00:09:14,440 Speaker 1: the data level, this method of positioning your eyes to 182 00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:17,479 Speaker 1: activate alpha frequency in your brain, this method to reprogram 183 00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:20,360 Speaker 1: your subconscious, this method to manifest a goal, this method 184 00:09:20,440 --> 00:09:24,360 Speaker 1: to do healing. And that structured approach captivated me. Now 185 00:09:24,400 --> 00:09:27,640 Speaker 1: we call that active meditation. That's the word Jose Silver 186 00:09:27,920 --> 00:09:30,800 Speaker 1: use or show use the same word active meditation. This 187 00:09:30,880 --> 00:09:34,240 Speaker 1: means it's different from passive meditation, which was more than 188 00:09:34,280 --> 00:09:38,920 Speaker 1: meditation from Hinduism, from Eastern cultures, where you focus on 189 00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:41,719 Speaker 1: your breadth or you go within, and there's a usefulness 190 00:09:41,720 --> 00:09:44,480 Speaker 1: in that. But what I loved about active meditation is, 191 00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:47,880 Speaker 1: in the words of jose Silver, you use it to 192 00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:51,280 Speaker 1: solve problems. You do not push your problems away. You 193 00:09:51,320 --> 00:09:53,920 Speaker 1: turn your problems into a project. You have skin disease, 194 00:09:54,240 --> 00:09:56,120 Speaker 1: You're going to heal it. You need to achieve a 195 00:09:56,120 --> 00:09:58,920 Speaker 1: business goal, You're going to make it happen. And you 196 00:09:58,920 --> 00:10:02,640 Speaker 1: would apply different tools to solve these problems. Now, when 197 00:10:02,679 --> 00:10:05,320 Speaker 1: I was in Silicon Valley, I applied the Silver method 198 00:10:05,360 --> 00:10:08,160 Speaker 1: and it completely transformed my career. I was able to 199 00:10:08,200 --> 00:10:11,640 Speaker 1: hold down two jobs. I got promotion after promotion after promotion. 200 00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:14,240 Speaker 1: At the age of twenty six, I was vice president 201 00:10:14,360 --> 00:10:17,720 Speaker 1: of a booming dot com and I was meditating using 202 00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:20,880 Speaker 1: the Silver method and other practices I would combine with it, 203 00:10:21,400 --> 00:10:24,280 Speaker 1: and one day I certainly had a calling. I realized 204 00:10:24,280 --> 00:10:27,000 Speaker 1: that meditation was the most powerful thing I'd learned in life. 205 00:10:27,160 --> 00:10:29,480 Speaker 1: It was the reason why I was successful at my career. 206 00:10:30,080 --> 00:10:34,080 Speaker 1: Yet my university degree for which I paid almost a 207 00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:39,680 Speaker 1: quarter million dollars for taught me Jack. It wasn't really 208 00:10:39,720 --> 00:10:42,440 Speaker 1: helping me. So I decided I wanted to do something 209 00:10:42,480 --> 00:10:44,640 Speaker 1: that could help the world. I decided to quit and 210 00:10:44,679 --> 00:10:47,720 Speaker 1: become a meditation teacher. Now, as I started becoming a 211 00:10:47,760 --> 00:10:50,800 Speaker 1: meditation teacher, as I started compiling all of these methods, 212 00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:54,440 Speaker 1: I needed something for myself, and I look at meditation 213 00:10:54,520 --> 00:10:57,160 Speaker 1: from as a tool. Okay, so a lot of people say, 214 00:10:57,200 --> 00:11:01,319 Speaker 1: all right, meditation as a form of self awareness of prayer. Yes, yes, yes, 215 00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:04,719 Speaker 1: But meditation is also a tool. The point of meditation, 216 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:07,520 Speaker 1: in the words of the great teacher Emily Fletcher, is 217 00:11:07,520 --> 00:11:09,720 Speaker 1: not to get good at meditation. It is to get 218 00:11:09,760 --> 00:11:12,680 Speaker 1: good at life. And so I use two different types 219 00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:14,920 Speaker 1: of tools. Now, let's think about our home. We have 220 00:11:14,960 --> 00:11:17,160 Speaker 1: coffee makers and we have electric drills. We use a 221 00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:20,280 Speaker 1: coffee maker every single day or a teakettle every single 222 00:11:20,360 --> 00:11:22,959 Speaker 1: day to put ourselves in a good state to start 223 00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:25,480 Speaker 1: our morning. An electric drill is a power tool. You 224 00:11:25,520 --> 00:11:27,200 Speaker 1: don't use it every day. You use it when you 225 00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:29,000 Speaker 1: have a problem, when you have to drill a hole 226 00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:33,320 Speaker 1: in a wall or threaten someone. I guess so in meditation, 227 00:11:33,559 --> 00:11:35,560 Speaker 1: the style that I teach. There are two types. You 228 00:11:35,600 --> 00:11:38,480 Speaker 1: would use a power tool like the Silver method, which 229 00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:41,480 Speaker 1: now sits on Mine Valley for a really tactical problem, 230 00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:45,240 Speaker 1: for example healing right. The Silver method has been proven 231 00:11:45,440 --> 00:11:48,440 Speaker 1: by doctor Okyl Simonton as a very effective form of 232 00:11:48,520 --> 00:11:52,360 Speaker 1: imagery therapy for accelerating healing. You're sick, you want to 233 00:11:52,400 --> 00:11:55,120 Speaker 1: do it. If you are suddenly feeling like you have 234 00:11:55,200 --> 00:11:57,319 Speaker 1: a migraine, you want to use it to help reduce 235 00:11:57,360 --> 00:12:01,160 Speaker 1: your migraine. The six phase is what I develop as 236 00:12:01,280 --> 00:12:05,000 Speaker 1: not the electric drill, but the coffee maker, something you 237 00:12:05,120 --> 00:12:08,840 Speaker 1: use every single day, even if your life is amazing. 238 00:12:08,840 --> 00:12:11,600 Speaker 1: You use it every single day because it helps put 239 00:12:11,640 --> 00:12:14,960 Speaker 1: you in a peak state for work, for happiness, for 240 00:12:15,120 --> 00:12:18,640 Speaker 1: human connection, and it puts you in this beautiful state 241 00:12:18,880 --> 00:12:21,240 Speaker 1: where it almost feels as if the universe has your 242 00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:23,800 Speaker 1: back like you have. You know, the tink about fairy 243 00:12:23,840 --> 00:12:26,920 Speaker 1: following you around, blessing everything you do and making your 244 00:12:26,920 --> 00:12:30,400 Speaker 1: life magical. This is how I view meditation. It's an 245 00:12:30,440 --> 00:12:34,600 Speaker 1: active approach to tackle the most complex problems in life, 246 00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:38,040 Speaker 1: but also as a daily approach to put you in 247 00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:41,839 Speaker 1: peak states of humanness. This is why I love talking 248 00:12:41,840 --> 00:12:44,000 Speaker 1: to you, because I love that explanation, and I think 249 00:12:44,040 --> 00:12:48,480 Speaker 1: that that breakdown of how meditation can be used differently 250 00:12:48,559 --> 00:12:51,600 Speaker 1: for different challenges is fantastic, and I love the analogy 251 00:12:51,640 --> 00:12:55,000 Speaker 1: with that with the teacatter will go with and the drill, 252 00:12:55,120 --> 00:12:58,959 Speaker 1: because I do think you're right that we've made meditation 253 00:12:59,440 --> 00:13:02,520 Speaker 1: well you just said is about becoming good at meditation, 254 00:13:02,840 --> 00:13:07,320 Speaker 1: which is absolutely irrelevant to life. And with the six 255 00:13:07,360 --> 00:13:10,480 Speaker 1: Phase method. What I love about it is that you 256 00:13:10,559 --> 00:13:13,800 Speaker 1: have the same thing that you loved about how the 257 00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:17,240 Speaker 1: Silver Method taught it. You've figured out your own method 258 00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:19,760 Speaker 1: that people can take now in this book. When you 259 00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:21,840 Speaker 1: talk about this is where I want to get into 260 00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:24,439 Speaker 1: some of this, and everyone who's watching and listening back 261 00:13:24,480 --> 00:13:27,280 Speaker 1: at home or wherever you are, I'm only going to 262 00:13:27,320 --> 00:13:29,080 Speaker 1: be giving you a tip of the iceberg. But I 263 00:13:29,120 --> 00:13:31,200 Speaker 1: want to give you this insight because my hope and 264 00:13:31,280 --> 00:13:33,360 Speaker 1: goal and intention is that you will go and order 265 00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:35,840 Speaker 1: the book right now while we're having this conversation to 266 00:13:35,880 --> 00:13:37,679 Speaker 1: really dive deep into it. But I want to give 267 00:13:37,720 --> 00:13:40,839 Speaker 1: you just enough to recognize how practical it is. So 268 00:13:41,720 --> 00:13:43,840 Speaker 1: you talk about how we need to start with the 269 00:13:43,880 --> 00:13:48,160 Speaker 1: circle of love and compassion. When I hear the word compassion, 270 00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:50,640 Speaker 1: and I think when a lot of people do compassion 271 00:13:50,679 --> 00:13:53,920 Speaker 1: feels like a tall order because I feel like it's 272 00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:57,959 Speaker 1: been removed. I think before compassion, we think of criticism, 273 00:13:58,040 --> 00:14:01,839 Speaker 1: We think of complaining, think of comparing, like those are 274 00:14:01,880 --> 00:14:05,080 Speaker 1: more natural thoughts. Can you talk to me about how 275 00:14:05,120 --> 00:14:09,320 Speaker 1: you had this epiphany that compassion was a beginning when 276 00:14:09,360 --> 00:14:14,360 Speaker 1: often our beginning places criticism, complaining, or comparison. So compassion 277 00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:17,760 Speaker 1: is not something you do for other people, that's a 278 00:14:17,800 --> 00:14:21,120 Speaker 1: great side effect. Compassion is something you do for yourself. 279 00:14:21,480 --> 00:14:24,840 Speaker 1: It changes the way you function and show up in 280 00:14:24,880 --> 00:14:28,080 Speaker 1: the world. So there's a lot of signs right now 281 00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:31,800 Speaker 1: on compassion practices that derive from Zen Roshi, Buddhism, or 282 00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:35,880 Speaker 1: even from the Heartmat Institute. For example, the Heartmat Institute 283 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:38,840 Speaker 1: found that if you just close your eyes and you 284 00:14:38,880 --> 00:14:41,360 Speaker 1: see the face of someone you love, you see the eyes, 285 00:14:41,400 --> 00:14:43,560 Speaker 1: you see the uns, you feel that love for them, 286 00:14:43,560 --> 00:14:46,120 Speaker 1: You feel it in your heart area. It changes your 287 00:14:46,160 --> 00:14:51,400 Speaker 1: heart resonance, and your heart resonance is a biomarker of health. 288 00:14:51,840 --> 00:14:57,560 Speaker 1: In short, giving love to someone else instantly physiologically changes 289 00:14:58,040 --> 00:15:02,480 Speaker 1: the heartbeat that you're having and puts it in a 290 00:15:02,520 --> 00:15:05,480 Speaker 1: better state. That shows that your body is in a 291 00:15:05,560 --> 00:15:10,119 Speaker 1: healthy heart residence correlates with health and I found this fascinating. 292 00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:12,600 Speaker 1: That is how we start the sixth space. Then we 293 00:15:12,640 --> 00:15:16,520 Speaker 1: move to a more advanced compassion practice where we extend 294 00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:20,360 Speaker 1: love across the world. Not if we start with our family, 295 00:15:20,520 --> 00:15:24,200 Speaker 1: our neighborhood, a city, a country, and then globally. Now 296 00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:26,840 Speaker 1: why is this important? Compassion is like a muscle. You 297 00:15:26,880 --> 00:15:29,000 Speaker 1: can train it and when you train it, you become 298 00:15:29,080 --> 00:15:33,320 Speaker 1: more loving. If you think about all the great saints 299 00:15:33,360 --> 00:15:37,360 Speaker 1: and sages and mystic compassion and love was a key 300 00:15:37,400 --> 00:15:40,920 Speaker 1: part of who they are, whether it's Yogananda or Jesus, 301 00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:43,800 Speaker 1: it was compassion and love. But this is how it 302 00:15:43,840 --> 00:15:47,480 Speaker 1: shows up in your world. Right. So I remember after 303 00:15:47,520 --> 00:15:50,600 Speaker 1: the pandemic, I went for breakfast with a friend. All 304 00:15:50,600 --> 00:15:53,200 Speaker 1: the restaurants have been closed for three months, and finally 305 00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:56,480 Speaker 1: that weekend everything opens and so we are waiting in 306 00:15:56,520 --> 00:15:58,960 Speaker 1: line for around twenty forty minutes to get in. Finally 307 00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:01,320 Speaker 1: we get in. It's really busy, so they can only 308 00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:04,280 Speaker 1: see this at the bar and all I'm creating is coffee, 309 00:16:04,320 --> 00:16:06,960 Speaker 1: eggs and some in a side of avocado. So I 310 00:16:07,080 --> 00:16:09,960 Speaker 1: ordered my coffee and twenty minutes later, the waitress hasn't 311 00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:12,040 Speaker 1: brought the coffee. The waitress is currying around. There's a 312 00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:14,200 Speaker 1: lot of people over there. She's wearing a mask, and 313 00:16:14,320 --> 00:16:16,520 Speaker 1: she left the coffee on the bar and I can 314 00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:19,400 Speaker 1: see it, and it's twenty minutes. I can't get her attention. 315 00:16:19,440 --> 00:16:21,680 Speaker 1: Finally she brings me the coffee, just puts it down, 316 00:16:21,720 --> 00:16:24,240 Speaker 1: doesn't even say anything, and it's gone cold. So I 317 00:16:24,280 --> 00:16:27,400 Speaker 1: have to order another coffee. That other coffee comes ten 318 00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:30,080 Speaker 1: minutes later. Then my omelet comes forty minutes later. They 319 00:16:30,120 --> 00:16:33,080 Speaker 1: forgot the avocado and all of this chaos. Now at 320 00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:35,680 Speaker 1: the end of that, as I was tipping the waitress, 321 00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:38,000 Speaker 1: I still had a smile on my face and I 322 00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:41,120 Speaker 1: gave a tip worth fifty percent of the entire bill. 323 00:16:41,480 --> 00:16:43,800 Speaker 1: So my friend looked at me and goes, what are 324 00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:47,400 Speaker 1: you doing? Like the service here was horrible. She doesn't 325 00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:50,920 Speaker 1: deserve fifty percent, And I said, really, well, I thought 326 00:16:50,920 --> 00:16:53,520 Speaker 1: she did, And I explained it to my friend as 327 00:16:53,560 --> 00:16:55,920 Speaker 1: it look it's all how we see it. To me, 328 00:16:56,480 --> 00:16:59,080 Speaker 1: I'm just happy to be here, to be able to 329 00:16:59,120 --> 00:17:02,320 Speaker 1: eat outdoors again. It doesn't matter we had to wait 330 00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:04,480 Speaker 1: twenty minutes in line. It was just nice being able 331 00:17:04,520 --> 00:17:07,919 Speaker 1: to step into a restaurant after three months. That waitress 332 00:17:07,920 --> 00:17:11,919 Speaker 1: she's been running around with a mask on herself for gosh, 333 00:17:11,960 --> 00:17:14,480 Speaker 1: maybe twelve hours. Look at the line. She's not even 334 00:17:14,520 --> 00:17:17,280 Speaker 1: getting a break, and probably for the last three months 335 00:17:17,280 --> 00:17:19,800 Speaker 1: she didn't have a job. She's probably worried about how 336 00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:21,919 Speaker 1: to put food on the table. And that's why I 337 00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:24,400 Speaker 1: gave her a fifty percent tip. I don't care if 338 00:17:24,440 --> 00:17:27,760 Speaker 1: my coffee was cold or my avocado came late. That 339 00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:30,679 Speaker 1: didn't even register for me. Rather, I was in a 340 00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:35,200 Speaker 1: state of appreciation of love, of, or at the humanity 341 00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:37,639 Speaker 1: around me, even if it was a little bit messy. 342 00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:41,520 Speaker 1: Compassion had put me in that zone when you see 343 00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:44,679 Speaker 1: someone else, even if it seems like what they did 344 00:17:44,760 --> 00:17:47,560 Speaker 1: is wrong to you, you look at them with a 345 00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:50,439 Speaker 1: sense of empathy, with a sense of understanding. And it 346 00:17:50,560 --> 00:17:55,080 Speaker 1: is that understanding that changes and reframes your definition of 347 00:17:55,119 --> 00:17:57,760 Speaker 1: the world. So I'm not saying due compassion so you 348 00:17:57,800 --> 00:18:01,439 Speaker 1: become a better tipper. I'm saying due compassion because the 349 00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:05,920 Speaker 1: world becomes a more beautiful, a life connected place, and 350 00:18:06,119 --> 00:18:09,040 Speaker 1: your life becomes more peaceful. Now the side effect is 351 00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:12,360 Speaker 1: everyone you come in contact with you bring happiness into 352 00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:15,399 Speaker 1: their lives and the world needs that today. What I 353 00:18:15,480 --> 00:18:17,840 Speaker 1: love about that example is that it shows something in 354 00:18:17,880 --> 00:18:21,760 Speaker 1: a personal way that we all experience. And it's so 355 00:18:21,880 --> 00:18:25,760 Speaker 1: fascinating because I've been experimenting with something similar in a 356 00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:28,840 Speaker 1: professional setting. So a lot of people would say, oh, yeah, 357 00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:31,000 Speaker 1: you can do that, you know, with a waiter or 358 00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:34,520 Speaker 1: a waitress at a store. But then what about someone 359 00:18:34,560 --> 00:18:38,440 Speaker 1: in your workplace? And I realized that if you go 360 00:18:39,560 --> 00:18:42,920 Speaker 1: hard on people and people experience this. I think we've 361 00:18:42,960 --> 00:18:44,959 Speaker 1: all had experiences it. We've all had bosses who are 362 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:48,680 Speaker 1: hard on us. And I've found that when my bosses 363 00:18:48,720 --> 00:18:52,600 Speaker 1: were hard with me, it closed me off. It didn't 364 00:18:52,640 --> 00:18:55,359 Speaker 1: open me up. Whereas if someone checked in with me 365 00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:57,959 Speaker 1: and said, hey, Jay, you look like you're struggling a bit. 366 00:18:58,040 --> 00:19:01,080 Speaker 1: Is everything okay at home? Like is your family okay? 367 00:19:01,119 --> 00:19:03,399 Speaker 1: Like how things going? You don't have to tell me, 368 00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:05,080 Speaker 1: but if you feel like telling me, let me know. 369 00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:09,520 Speaker 1: That allowed me to have a safe space and want 370 00:19:09,560 --> 00:19:12,359 Speaker 1: to deliver more for that person, as opposed to if 371 00:19:12,359 --> 00:19:14,840 Speaker 1: that person came up to me and goes, I'm not 372 00:19:14,880 --> 00:19:17,560 Speaker 1: really happy with your performance right now. Like hearing that 373 00:19:17,640 --> 00:19:20,560 Speaker 1: from someone didn't open someone up and so even your 374 00:19:20,600 --> 00:19:25,360 Speaker 1: same approach in a professional setting still works and applies 375 00:19:25,640 --> 00:19:28,000 Speaker 1: that when you approach someone or someone approaches you and 376 00:19:28,080 --> 00:19:30,320 Speaker 1: just says, hey, I can tell that you're dealing with 377 00:19:30,359 --> 00:19:32,960 Speaker 1: a few issues or something must be going on. Do 378 00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:35,520 Speaker 1: you feel like telling me? I think that compassion is 379 00:19:35,560 --> 00:19:38,919 Speaker 1: such a superpower and it's so underestimated. Where did we 380 00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:40,920 Speaker 1: lose that? Where do we go wrong? I think we 381 00:19:41,119 --> 00:19:45,040 Speaker 1: underestimate it because for the longest time in society, we 382 00:19:45,200 --> 00:19:51,280 Speaker 1: thought kindness is associated with weakness, strength, power, Even to 383 00:19:51,320 --> 00:19:53,920 Speaker 1: put power over someone else was a sign of strength. 384 00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:55,240 Speaker 1: With the dab, we know that's not true. There was 385 00:19:55,280 --> 00:19:58,800 Speaker 1: a Gallop study done on two ten million employees and 386 00:19:59,119 --> 00:20:01,840 Speaker 1: they found that the employees who loved their jobs more, 387 00:20:01,880 --> 00:20:04,120 Speaker 1: who were most engaged, who were most productive, who had 388 00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:07,880 Speaker 1: one of the highest correlations with revenue growth, answered yes 389 00:20:07,920 --> 00:20:11,680 Speaker 1: to the following question. My supervisor or someone at work 390 00:20:11,920 --> 00:20:15,360 Speaker 1: cared about me as a person. Wow, and that's compassion. Now, 391 00:20:15,359 --> 00:20:19,200 Speaker 1: I remember a funny story about you, so I remember me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, 392 00:20:19,240 --> 00:20:21,960 Speaker 1: that shows how compassionate you. So I want to share 393 00:20:21,960 --> 00:20:24,800 Speaker 1: this with the audience. We were having dinner at mind 394 00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:27,440 Speaker 1: Dali's Festival, a fest this was that festival in Nibita 395 00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:30,480 Speaker 1: and you disappeared to use the restroom. Oh yeah, and 396 00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:33,000 Speaker 1: then we never saw you for two hours. So imagine 397 00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:34,840 Speaker 1: you're having dinner with someone. They about six people in 398 00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:36,399 Speaker 1: the dinner table, and that person goes, I have to 399 00:20:36,400 --> 00:20:39,919 Speaker 1: go use the restroom. Two hours later, he hasn't come back, 400 00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:43,480 Speaker 1: and so you're thinking, gosh, what a jerk. If he 401 00:20:43,560 --> 00:20:45,680 Speaker 1: was bought by my company, he should have just said Vision, 402 00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:47,080 Speaker 1: I'm going to go to sleep. He had to make 403 00:20:47,119 --> 00:20:51,159 Speaker 1: that restroom excuse. So I was mildly annoyed by you, 404 00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:53,560 Speaker 1: and then I realized what happened. Jay went to use 405 00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:56,240 Speaker 1: the restroom, and as you were coming out of the restroom, 406 00:20:56,400 --> 00:20:59,000 Speaker 1: one by one people were coming out to take photos 407 00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:01,840 Speaker 1: with you or you for advice. And you stood there 408 00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:07,320 Speaker 1: for almost two hours talking to everyone, taking photos, giving 409 00:21:07,320 --> 00:21:09,320 Speaker 1: them the advice they needed, and then you were so 410 00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:12,960 Speaker 1: tired you went to sleep. That's compassion. And see you 411 00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:15,480 Speaker 1: may have done that almost just organically, but I never 412 00:21:15,520 --> 00:21:19,199 Speaker 1: forget that, and that put you at hero status in 413 00:21:19,240 --> 00:21:21,800 Speaker 1: my mind. No, well, I honestly have to say it's 414 00:21:21,920 --> 00:21:24,440 Speaker 1: it's because you attract the best people like the culture 415 00:21:24,480 --> 00:21:27,520 Speaker 1: and community of the quality of individual that comes to 416 00:21:27,560 --> 00:21:30,119 Speaker 1: mind Valley Events is really special. And you know, I 417 00:21:30,840 --> 00:21:33,520 Speaker 1: know that I know so many A fests in my 418 00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:36,040 Speaker 1: personal life as well, like Irvin who's one of my 419 00:21:36,080 --> 00:21:39,320 Speaker 1: closest friends, Irvin Valencia e And it's like he's been 420 00:21:39,359 --> 00:21:40,600 Speaker 1: an eighth I think he's like, I don't know how 421 00:21:40,640 --> 00:21:43,040 Speaker 1: many A fests he's been to, maybe like nine or something. 422 00:21:43,080 --> 00:21:44,600 Speaker 1: I don't know, he's been to a lot. I think 423 00:21:44,320 --> 00:21:47,320 Speaker 1: he's the help director for the New York Knicks. Yeah, absolutely, 424 00:21:47,359 --> 00:21:49,760 Speaker 1: absolutely is the director of training and conditioning at the Knicks. 425 00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:52,720 Speaker 1: And it's just like he's the embodiment of everything we're 426 00:21:52,760 --> 00:21:55,040 Speaker 1: talking about in a beautiful way. And I think I 427 00:21:55,080 --> 00:21:56,440 Speaker 1: did that because of the quality of the people you 428 00:21:56,520 --> 00:21:58,879 Speaker 1: are tract But I appreciate you remembering these things. Obviously, 429 00:21:58,920 --> 00:22:02,720 Speaker 1: meditation is your good memor. So I say that because 430 00:22:02,920 --> 00:22:07,040 Speaker 1: compassion today, kindness is the ultimate flex. I remember fifteen 431 00:22:07,080 --> 00:22:08,879 Speaker 1: years ago, when people wanted to sell you stuff on 432 00:22:08,920 --> 00:22:11,040 Speaker 1: the internet, do this to make money, do this to 433 00:22:11,040 --> 00:22:13,320 Speaker 1: build a business. They would post with their Lamborghini or 434 00:22:13,320 --> 00:22:16,119 Speaker 1: the car. Today, nobody gives a damn to day. The 435 00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:19,920 Speaker 1: stuff that we share on Instagram out very often inspirational stories, 436 00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:25,080 Speaker 1: people doing kind acts, people saving animals, people doing great 437 00:22:25,119 --> 00:22:29,000 Speaker 1: things for kids. Compassion is to flex in today's society. 438 00:22:29,440 --> 00:22:36,119 Speaker 1: What is the difference between a technique and a pure 439 00:22:36,240 --> 00:22:39,960 Speaker 1: intention in the sense of we know each other well, 440 00:22:40,000 --> 00:22:42,320 Speaker 1: and I know that you've meditated for god knows how 441 00:22:42,359 --> 00:22:44,800 Speaker 1: many years now, and I know how much study you've done, 442 00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:46,720 Speaker 1: and how many incredible people use this method, like so 443 00:22:46,760 --> 00:22:50,040 Speaker 1: many celebrities and athletes use this method. What have you 444 00:22:50,119 --> 00:22:53,000 Speaker 1: found to be the difference between someone who uses compassion 445 00:22:53,040 --> 00:22:56,240 Speaker 1: as a technique to get what they want or to 446 00:22:56,320 --> 00:23:00,000 Speaker 1: present themselves a certain way versus what is the difference 447 00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:03,920 Speaker 1: in result and practice in someone who's doing it from 448 00:23:03,920 --> 00:23:06,879 Speaker 1: a pure place. I'm just fascinating absolutely, Okay, So the 449 00:23:06,960 --> 00:23:11,200 Speaker 1: technique is not compassion. The technique is the circle of compassion, 450 00:23:11,240 --> 00:23:14,440 Speaker 1: which is the specific exercise we do inspired by Zen 451 00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:17,840 Speaker 1: Roshi Buddhism and the Heart Meat Institute to expand and 452 00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:22,520 Speaker 1: open your heart. Right, So that is the technique. The 453 00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:25,880 Speaker 1: compassion itself is a quality of being. So the six 454 00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:29,119 Speaker 1: space is six specific techniques that layer on top of 455 00:23:29,160 --> 00:23:32,600 Speaker 1: each other, that open up six different aspects of your being, 456 00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:36,040 Speaker 1: which I believe are really important for you to show 457 00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:38,080 Speaker 1: up in the world not just as a good human being, 458 00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:40,520 Speaker 1: but to crush it at work, to hit your goals, 459 00:23:40,520 --> 00:23:42,720 Speaker 1: to get things done, and to do it from this 460 00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:46,399 Speaker 1: state of just absolute bliss and equanimity. The point is 461 00:23:46,440 --> 00:23:51,200 Speaker 1: you're making is that you can't even use compassion for 462 00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:57,200 Speaker 1: lower means or lower requirements, because that's fake kindness. Right, 463 00:23:57,240 --> 00:24:00,359 Speaker 1: You're doing something to get something, But thee think that 464 00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:04,080 Speaker 1: we are doing actually trains your brain to understand how 465 00:24:04,119 --> 00:24:07,720 Speaker 1: deeply connected you are. If you do this, you automatically 466 00:24:07,720 --> 00:24:11,040 Speaker 1: become nicer. So, yeah, you're talking about the actual change 467 00:24:11,080 --> 00:24:15,480 Speaker 1: in consciousness and like transforming your character as opposed to 468 00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:19,240 Speaker 1: like what we're saying, like I'm talking about marketing versus meaning, 469 00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:21,399 Speaker 1: like the idea of like, oh I can market this 470 00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:23,719 Speaker 1: stuff versus this actually makes sense. There was one thing 471 00:24:23,760 --> 00:24:26,280 Speaker 1: specific I wanted to ask you talk about happiness and gratitude. 472 00:24:27,160 --> 00:24:30,520 Speaker 1: I wanted to ask you your take on after all 473 00:24:30,560 --> 00:24:34,119 Speaker 1: these years, you've helped so many teachers share their work. 474 00:24:34,400 --> 00:24:36,840 Speaker 1: You've helped so many like that's one of the most 475 00:24:36,880 --> 00:24:39,040 Speaker 1: special things about you that I appreciate about you is 476 00:24:39,040 --> 00:24:42,720 Speaker 1: that you're not just presenting what you know you're supporting 477 00:24:42,760 --> 00:24:45,680 Speaker 1: the work of so many other incredible people, and you've 478 00:24:45,680 --> 00:24:47,879 Speaker 1: supported mine too. You know you've supported me too in 479 00:24:47,920 --> 00:24:51,520 Speaker 1: such a deep and beautiful way. And what I'm intrigued by, though, 480 00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:53,679 Speaker 1: is out of all the reading you've done, all the 481 00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:57,240 Speaker 1: studying you've done, what is happiness? Is happiness in your eyes? 482 00:24:57,320 --> 00:24:59,760 Speaker 1: Still a goal? Is a pursuit? Is it a by? 483 00:25:00,560 --> 00:25:04,000 Speaker 1: What is happiness? Because I feel like we still don't know. 484 00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:05,840 Speaker 1: We still hear people talking about I just want to 485 00:25:05,840 --> 00:25:09,600 Speaker 1: be happy. Well, my goal is to be happy. What's 486 00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:12,320 Speaker 1: visions take on that? So happiness is not the goal 487 00:25:12,359 --> 00:25:14,720 Speaker 1: at all. In fact, happiness is not even what we 488 00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:19,720 Speaker 1: care about. What we're looking at is a concept called 489 00:25:19,800 --> 00:25:23,960 Speaker 1: bliss siplin. Bliss siplin is not being happy. It's not 490 00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:27,560 Speaker 1: forcing yourself to be happy. Look, I am a person 491 00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:30,400 Speaker 1: who can be prone to depression. It's actually in my 492 00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:34,479 Speaker 1: DNA wo right, you can measure these things now with DNA, 493 00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:37,040 Speaker 1: and I've been in depression in my life. I'm also 494 00:25:37,080 --> 00:25:41,560 Speaker 1: a person who is prone to melancholy. Melancholy is when 495 00:25:41,600 --> 00:25:43,800 Speaker 1: I want to when it Typically it happens when it's raining, 496 00:25:44,119 --> 00:25:47,679 Speaker 1: I want to sit by the fire, listen to sad 497 00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:52,040 Speaker 1: music and just be by myself. And I like that. 498 00:25:52,680 --> 00:25:56,560 Speaker 1: I'm not happy. I'm neither am I sad or depressed. 499 00:25:56,600 --> 00:25:59,320 Speaker 1: I'm just melancholy and it's a beautiful feeling and we 500 00:25:59,359 --> 00:26:01,880 Speaker 1: all feel that sometimes. If you've ever seen to pick 501 00:26:01,920 --> 00:26:04,280 Speaker 1: some movie inside out, it shows that sadness can be 502 00:26:04,320 --> 00:26:07,320 Speaker 1: a superpower. You can be sad when you miss someone, 503 00:26:07,480 --> 00:26:10,040 Speaker 1: you can be sad when you're grieving. There's a beautiful 504 00:26:10,119 --> 00:26:14,879 Speaker 1: quote from the Disney show Wanda Vision, what is grief 505 00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:19,480 Speaker 1: that love persisting? The goal is and to push away sadness, rather, 506 00:26:19,520 --> 00:26:21,760 Speaker 1: the goal isness. Is to remember this when we are 507 00:26:21,760 --> 00:26:25,679 Speaker 1: showing up with people, when we are showing up at work. 508 00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:30,280 Speaker 1: The thing that matters is the concept of blisscipline, and 509 00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:34,160 Speaker 1: that is having the discipline to ensure that you are 510 00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:39,560 Speaker 1: you are nurturing your positive emotions. Now, positive emotions doesn't 511 00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:42,560 Speaker 1: mean you're fake happy. Positive emotions mean that even if 512 00:26:42,560 --> 00:26:45,919 Speaker 1: you're sad, you can observe it. Like, I love that quote, 513 00:26:45,920 --> 00:26:50,480 Speaker 1: what is grief but love persisting? Because if you're grieving someone, 514 00:26:50,640 --> 00:26:53,919 Speaker 1: that's a beautiful emotion. You can grieve someone who has 515 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:56,560 Speaker 1: left your life, but you're not beating yourself out of it, 516 00:26:56,600 --> 00:26:58,720 Speaker 1: So you're still in a way blissful. Now why is 517 00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:01,760 Speaker 1: this important. There's a study call PQ and there's a 518 00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:05,960 Speaker 1: book about it by Shaja Shahmin, and PQ means positivity quotation. 519 00:27:06,160 --> 00:27:10,400 Speaker 1: It's your ratio of good thoughts versus overall thoughts. Now, 520 00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:13,920 Speaker 1: what they find is that the higher your PQ, the 521 00:27:14,000 --> 00:27:17,440 Speaker 1: better you function at your job. The better you function 522 00:27:17,560 --> 00:27:20,120 Speaker 1: at your work. We spend seventy percent of our work, 523 00:27:20,240 --> 00:27:23,240 Speaker 1: of our waking hours on our work. And so if 524 00:27:23,280 --> 00:27:27,120 Speaker 1: we can practice blisscipline and elevate our PQ, we get 525 00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:30,400 Speaker 1: more done, We are happier as we work, the quality 526 00:27:30,440 --> 00:27:32,560 Speaker 1: of our work is better. But you know, the studies 527 00:27:32,560 --> 00:27:35,360 Speaker 1: on PQ fascinate me. They found that the number one 528 00:27:35,440 --> 00:27:38,760 Speaker 1: thing that determines how well a team functions is their 529 00:27:38,800 --> 00:27:42,000 Speaker 1: PQ is what is the ratio of positive emotions within 530 00:27:42,080 --> 00:27:44,479 Speaker 1: the team and between the members of this team. And 531 00:27:44,560 --> 00:27:47,879 Speaker 1: so if we can train for bliss scipline, if we 532 00:27:47,920 --> 00:27:52,440 Speaker 1: can put ourselves in these blissful states, we simply do better. Now. 533 00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:55,320 Speaker 1: One of the most beautiful things I read was in 534 00:27:55,359 --> 00:27:58,639 Speaker 1: the book Titan. It's the biography of John D. Rockefeller. 535 00:27:58,680 --> 00:28:01,119 Speaker 1: He was the richest man whoever lived, and at the 536 00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:04,320 Speaker 1: age of eighty three, John D. Reckefeller wrote a beautiful 537 00:28:04,440 --> 00:28:08,560 Speaker 1: poem that illustrates this idea of blissipline. He said, I 538 00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:11,879 Speaker 1: was early thought to work as well as play. My 539 00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:15,679 Speaker 1: life has been one long, happy holiday, full of work, 540 00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:19,960 Speaker 1: full of play, and I left the worry along the way, 541 00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:23,640 Speaker 1: and God was good to me every day. And that's 542 00:28:23,680 --> 00:28:26,240 Speaker 1: really what we're talking about now. If the richest man 543 00:28:26,280 --> 00:28:29,880 Speaker 1: in the world could pen that, imagine what this quality, 544 00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:32,560 Speaker 1: what this essence can do for you. It's amazing, isn't it. 545 00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:34,760 Speaker 1: How what we read or what we think about become 546 00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:37,840 Speaker 1: the scripts of our life. And I feel just as 547 00:28:37,840 --> 00:28:40,560 Speaker 1: you're according people that have inspired you. I feel like 548 00:28:40,600 --> 00:28:43,200 Speaker 1: for me, half the thoughts in my head. I think 549 00:28:43,200 --> 00:28:47,480 Speaker 1: I've things I've absorbed and held on to that then 550 00:28:47,680 --> 00:28:51,479 Speaker 1: create my story in my script. I didn't know what 551 00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:54,040 Speaker 1: you just said about you. That's actually such interesting news 552 00:28:54,040 --> 00:28:55,720 Speaker 1: to me. I don't think we've ever spoken about that. 553 00:28:56,160 --> 00:28:59,880 Speaker 1: I loved how you talked about how melancholy isn't happiness, 554 00:29:00,160 --> 00:29:03,400 Speaker 1: isn't sadness, but you enjoy that feeling. I feel the 555 00:29:03,440 --> 00:29:06,680 Speaker 1: same way about solitude of spending time alone like I 556 00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:08,920 Speaker 1: often look forward to spending time alone. I try and 557 00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:11,960 Speaker 1: make time to spend alone. I'll often choose being alone 558 00:29:11,960 --> 00:29:15,160 Speaker 1: as opposed to doing something else. And that's not because 559 00:29:15,200 --> 00:29:17,920 Speaker 1: I'm happy or ecstatic about it or I'm not sad 560 00:29:17,960 --> 00:29:20,880 Speaker 1: about it. It just brings me joy. But what I 561 00:29:20,920 --> 00:29:23,640 Speaker 1: didn't know about you was this bend you said towards 562 00:29:23,840 --> 00:29:26,040 Speaker 1: depression or depressive thoughts. And I want to go there. 563 00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:30,440 Speaker 1: What has been the most depressing state that you've been 564 00:29:30,480 --> 00:29:33,720 Speaker 1: in that the six meditation method and other methods that 565 00:29:33,760 --> 00:29:36,840 Speaker 1: you practice and even teach today have helped you out 566 00:29:36,840 --> 00:29:39,280 Speaker 1: of what has been that point. So so first you 567 00:29:39,320 --> 00:29:42,880 Speaker 1: got to understand face one, compassion, Phase two, gratitude, Face three, forgiveness. 568 00:29:42,920 --> 00:29:46,520 Speaker 1: All of these qualities have been scientifically proven to lower 569 00:29:46,680 --> 00:29:51,000 Speaker 1: risk of depression and lower situations where you're feeling anxious 570 00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:53,920 Speaker 1: or panic. But I have gone true depression in my life. 571 00:29:53,920 --> 00:29:57,040 Speaker 1: I have gone moments where I was profoundly sad. That 572 00:29:57,160 --> 00:30:00,280 Speaker 1: hasn't happened much in the past decade or so, part 573 00:30:00,280 --> 00:30:02,600 Speaker 1: of the reasons because of the sixth face. But it 574 00:30:02,640 --> 00:30:04,880 Speaker 1: doesn't mean that I don't get sad. All of us 575 00:30:04,880 --> 00:30:07,520 Speaker 1: are going to go through troubles in life. I miss people. Yesterday, 576 00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:10,360 Speaker 1: I was sad because it was my son's birthday, he 577 00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:12,440 Speaker 1: turned fifteen, and I couldn't be with him because I 578 00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:14,280 Speaker 1: was doing a big event in la and my son 579 00:30:14,320 --> 00:30:17,720 Speaker 1: lives in Estonia in Europe. And there's nothing wrong with 580 00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:21,840 Speaker 1: being sad about that, right, but true, that's sadness I 581 00:30:21,960 --> 00:30:23,960 Speaker 1: left him. I think one of the most beautiful voice 582 00:30:24,000 --> 00:30:26,440 Speaker 1: mails i've ever less my son about how much I 583 00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:32,520 Speaker 1: love him. So you can channel sadness love into compassion, 584 00:30:32,760 --> 00:30:38,800 Speaker 1: into vulnerability and help you connect with yourself and other people. Yeah, 585 00:30:38,840 --> 00:30:43,320 Speaker 1: how do you stop sadness from developing into guilt? Because 586 00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:45,080 Speaker 1: I find that you could have easily gone the other way. 587 00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:46,920 Speaker 1: You could have been like, all right, I'm sad that 588 00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:48,560 Speaker 1: I'm not with my son on my birthday. I'm a 589 00:30:48,640 --> 00:30:51,280 Speaker 1: terrible dad, which I know you're not, but you could 590 00:30:51,280 --> 00:30:53,440 Speaker 1: say I'm a terrible dad, and people do feel this way. 591 00:30:53,520 --> 00:30:56,360 Speaker 1: I'm a terrible dad. I care more about my work, 592 00:30:56,800 --> 00:30:59,240 Speaker 1: by my actions, than I do about my son. Someone could, 593 00:30:59,480 --> 00:31:02,280 Speaker 1: I'm saying, would think of this story. They could think 594 00:31:02,520 --> 00:31:04,240 Speaker 1: I should have flown back and should have been there. 595 00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:05,920 Speaker 1: So these are these are the things that I hear 596 00:31:05,920 --> 00:31:09,760 Speaker 1: from parents all the time exactly right. So this past 597 00:31:09,880 --> 00:31:11,920 Speaker 1: four weeks, I'm in a four week book to our 598 00:31:12,000 --> 00:31:13,440 Speaker 1: right now, this is the longest I've been away from 599 00:31:13,480 --> 00:31:16,720 Speaker 1: my kids. But the reasons so I get that, and 600 00:31:16,800 --> 00:31:19,160 Speaker 1: I've never been traveled this much away from them because 601 00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:22,239 Speaker 1: of that guilt. But I realized that was silly. I 602 00:31:22,400 --> 00:31:25,560 Speaker 1: know that I'm deeply connected to my children. I've learned 603 00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:29,000 Speaker 1: since then that it's not about being with them all 604 00:31:29,040 --> 00:31:31,520 Speaker 1: the time. It's about when you're with them, how do 605 00:31:31,600 --> 00:31:33,600 Speaker 1: you feel with them and how do you make them feel? 606 00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:36,120 Speaker 1: But how do I overcome that guilt? Well, that's where 607 00:31:36,160 --> 00:31:39,120 Speaker 1: Phase three comes in. Guilt is one of the lowest 608 00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:43,120 Speaker 1: human emotions, guilt and shame from a consciousness vibration point 609 00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:44,520 Speaker 1: of view. If you look at the hawk and scale 610 00:31:44,840 --> 00:31:47,000 Speaker 1: right at the bottom, guilt and shame, you don't want 611 00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:50,960 Speaker 1: to get there. Phase three is about healing from guilt 612 00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:53,240 Speaker 1: and shame. So when you practice forgiveness, and in the 613 00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:56,120 Speaker 1: sixth phase, we teach you a eight step forgiveness protocol 614 00:31:56,200 --> 00:31:59,880 Speaker 1: that you stick right in. You forgive yourself for mistakes 615 00:32:00,120 --> 00:32:02,480 Speaker 1: made in the past. You forgive yourself for things that 616 00:32:02,520 --> 00:32:05,120 Speaker 1: you may feel shameful for or guilty for but you 617 00:32:05,240 --> 00:32:09,880 Speaker 1: also learn to heal and forgive the acts of others. 618 00:32:10,480 --> 00:32:13,440 Speaker 1: It turns out if you want to develop the brainwave 619 00:32:13,560 --> 00:32:16,480 Speaker 1: of the monks. So they've actually measured the brainwave states 620 00:32:16,480 --> 00:32:18,480 Speaker 1: of monks and eurro monks. So I bet you there 621 00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:23,200 Speaker 1: as well. So monks have high left right brain coherence 622 00:32:23,280 --> 00:32:24,760 Speaker 1: that means you're left and right brain are kind of 623 00:32:24,840 --> 00:32:27,520 Speaker 1: vibing at the same level, and high alpha amplitude. So 624 00:32:27,560 --> 00:32:29,360 Speaker 1: they found this in zen Roshi monks who have spent 625 00:32:29,520 --> 00:32:32,640 Speaker 1: twenty to forty years in meditation. So at the biocyber 626 00:32:32,640 --> 00:32:34,920 Speaker 1: Aud Institute in Vancouver, where they mapped the brain made 627 00:32:34,920 --> 00:32:36,840 Speaker 1: states of monks, they found that these were the two 628 00:32:36,920 --> 00:32:39,280 Speaker 1: qualities that you want to create. But how do you 629 00:32:39,320 --> 00:32:45,160 Speaker 1: get that well? Forgiveness. Forgiveness and forgiving people who you 630 00:32:45,200 --> 00:32:47,760 Speaker 1: as well as forgiving mistakes that you made in the 631 00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:50,360 Speaker 1: past is the number one hack to get you in 632 00:32:50,440 --> 00:32:53,240 Speaker 1: that level. This is why forgiveness is space three because 633 00:32:53,280 --> 00:32:57,080 Speaker 1: I've seen miracles happen through the practice of forgiveness. Forgiveness 634 00:32:57,120 --> 00:32:59,760 Speaker 1: has been proven to not just improved back pain and 635 00:33:00,280 --> 00:33:03,240 Speaker 1: your heart, help improve the quality of your sleep, reduced 636 00:33:03,240 --> 00:33:06,560 Speaker 1: depression and anxiousness, A study show that it improves your 637 00:33:06,600 --> 00:33:09,160 Speaker 1: vertical chump. Another study in Israel show that it improves 638 00:33:09,160 --> 00:33:14,200 Speaker 1: your endurance. And for people who believe in manifesting, it's 639 00:33:14,280 --> 00:33:17,640 Speaker 1: quite possible, because I've heard this from any spiritual teachers. 640 00:33:17,680 --> 00:33:21,040 Speaker 1: It increases your rate of manifesting. That's why forgiveness is 641 00:33:21,080 --> 00:33:24,720 Speaker 1: space three, because I practice forgiveness in a very rapid 642 00:33:24,760 --> 00:33:28,000 Speaker 1: way every day, so each phase takes about two minutes 643 00:33:28,000 --> 00:33:30,920 Speaker 1: of practice. I don't experience guilt, I don't experience shame. 644 00:33:30,960 --> 00:33:33,640 Speaker 1: It doesn't mean I've never made mistakes. I just don't 645 00:33:33,680 --> 00:33:36,440 Speaker 1: beat myself up over it because you understand that we're 646 00:33:36,480 --> 00:33:39,240 Speaker 1: all human. I love that principle, and i'd say that 647 00:33:39,240 --> 00:33:42,120 Speaker 1: that applies to marriage, that applies to work, it applies 648 00:33:42,160 --> 00:33:45,040 Speaker 1: to ourselves. Like that idea. I always talk about how 649 00:33:45,920 --> 00:33:48,160 Speaker 1: one of the things that's helped me and my wife 650 00:33:48,200 --> 00:33:52,320 Speaker 1: massively in our marriage is that we're both wired to 651 00:33:52,440 --> 00:33:55,680 Speaker 1: forgive overnight. Yes, and I've never met many people. I'm 652 00:33:55,720 --> 00:33:57,880 Speaker 1: like that with nine percent of people. I'm me. I've 653 00:33:57,880 --> 00:34:00,400 Speaker 1: been like that for a long time. But my wife's 654 00:34:00,440 --> 00:34:02,080 Speaker 1: like that too, and that's really helped because then I 655 00:34:02,120 --> 00:34:03,680 Speaker 1: don't wake up in the morning and look at her 656 00:34:03,720 --> 00:34:05,760 Speaker 1: and go, oh god, she's still judging me for the 657 00:34:05,800 --> 00:34:08,920 Speaker 1: mistake I made last night. We've both moved on, and 658 00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:12,919 Speaker 1: so mirroring that habit is really powerful. But the two 659 00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:15,799 Speaker 1: ends of the spectrum are narcissism of like you know, 660 00:34:15,880 --> 00:34:18,560 Speaker 1: like letting go of all mistakes, which I know that's 661 00:34:18,640 --> 00:34:20,880 Speaker 1: not what you're recommending. And then the other thing, like 662 00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:23,960 Speaker 1: you're saying, is self sabotage and beating yourself up forever. 663 00:34:24,480 --> 00:34:26,520 Speaker 1: And you have these two polar opposites, and I think 664 00:34:26,520 --> 00:34:29,560 Speaker 1: people get so scared that they're doing one or the 665 00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:32,200 Speaker 1: other that they kind of avoid it. What is the 666 00:34:32,239 --> 00:34:34,560 Speaker 1: process to get to the forgiveness you're talking about where 667 00:34:34,560 --> 00:34:38,160 Speaker 1: you can allow yourself to move on. So narcissism is 668 00:34:38,200 --> 00:34:42,520 Speaker 1: self love without love for others. That's why we start 669 00:34:42,520 --> 00:34:46,040 Speaker 1: with compassion. When you start with compassion, you are training 670 00:34:46,080 --> 00:34:50,040 Speaker 1: your love for others. When we come to gratitude and forgiveness, 671 00:34:50,320 --> 00:34:54,239 Speaker 1: you're actually training your love for yourself. In the gratitude phase, 672 00:34:54,360 --> 00:34:57,399 Speaker 1: you don't just express gratitude for three things in your 673 00:34:57,400 --> 00:34:59,680 Speaker 1: work or three things in your personal life. You express 674 00:34:59,719 --> 00:35:03,000 Speaker 1: gratit for what you love about yourself. And that's because 675 00:35:03,120 --> 00:35:05,680 Speaker 1: why shouldn't we The world doesn't tell us to love 676 00:35:05,680 --> 00:35:09,240 Speaker 1: ourselves since we are kids, our education system, the people 677 00:35:09,239 --> 00:35:12,480 Speaker 1: around us point out our flaws. Most people don't have 678 00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:15,000 Speaker 1: a problem with self love. They have a problem with 679 00:35:15,040 --> 00:35:18,359 Speaker 1: self pity, self loading, with not enough self love. Now, 680 00:35:18,360 --> 00:35:20,840 Speaker 1: when you come to the forgiftness stage, you further amplify 681 00:35:20,920 --> 00:35:23,480 Speaker 1: your love for yourself. But remember you're doing these phases 682 00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:28,439 Speaker 1: after you express love for everyone else. Compassion first, then 683 00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:33,279 Speaker 1: gratitude and forgiveness, and this is how you avoid narcissistic tendencies. 684 00:35:33,440 --> 00:35:35,360 Speaker 1: I think it's become more and more challenging because I 685 00:35:35,360 --> 00:35:39,560 Speaker 1: think the rise of narcissistic personalities and the challenge that 686 00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:42,080 Speaker 1: people are experiencing in their relationships is just on such 687 00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:43,600 Speaker 1: a high. I feel like it's one of the most 688 00:35:43,800 --> 00:35:47,800 Speaker 1: talked about things right now, And I guess that also 689 00:35:47,840 --> 00:35:50,160 Speaker 1: stems from that feeling of like we never got a 690 00:35:50,239 --> 00:35:52,800 Speaker 1: chance to love each other so almost now where going 691 00:35:52,840 --> 00:35:56,440 Speaker 1: in that direction with step for a vision for the future. 692 00:35:56,960 --> 00:36:01,240 Speaker 1: This step is for some people a hard step because 693 00:36:01,239 --> 00:36:03,920 Speaker 1: the future is usually a place of anxiety. Right for 694 00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:07,640 Speaker 1: most people, the future is the place of uncertainty of anxiety. Obviously, 695 00:36:07,640 --> 00:36:10,640 Speaker 1: you've done these three steps to remove anxiety, et cetera. 696 00:36:10,680 --> 00:36:12,880 Speaker 1: That's where it's a perfect build up. I've heard so 697 00:36:12,920 --> 00:36:14,759 Speaker 1: many versions of what a good vision for the future is. 698 00:36:14,800 --> 00:36:16,680 Speaker 1: Some people say you should know exactly what you want. 699 00:36:16,760 --> 00:36:19,520 Speaker 1: Some people say you should have an overall vision. What 700 00:36:19,719 --> 00:36:22,960 Speaker 1: is the six phase version of So when you finished 701 00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:24,919 Speaker 1: phase three and you move to phase four, you're moving 702 00:36:24,920 --> 00:36:27,239 Speaker 1: into a different essence of being. My last book was 703 00:36:27,280 --> 00:36:30,640 Speaker 1: called The Buddha and the Badass, and that title came 704 00:36:30,680 --> 00:36:34,319 Speaker 1: from an essay by the great philosopher Ken Wilbur. And 705 00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:37,719 Speaker 1: that essay was called Egolessness, and it starts like this. 706 00:36:38,200 --> 00:36:40,879 Speaker 1: The great spiritual sages and saints of the world, from 707 00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:44,080 Speaker 1: Moses to Jesus to partner Sambaba, were not feeble minded 708 00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:47,200 Speaker 1: milktoas they will move us and shakers who rattled the 709 00:36:47,239 --> 00:36:50,279 Speaker 1: world with the force of their ego. From they instigated 710 00:36:50,400 --> 00:36:54,799 Speaker 1: massive social revolutions that lasted generations, from bull whips in 711 00:36:54,840 --> 00:36:58,560 Speaker 1: the temple to subduing entire continents. Now, what Ken Wilber 712 00:36:58,719 --> 00:37:01,600 Speaker 1: was saying is that the great spiritual teachers were not 713 00:37:01,760 --> 00:37:05,080 Speaker 1: just focused on the now, they were focused on the future. 714 00:37:05,640 --> 00:37:09,200 Speaker 1: Jesus wanted to build a legacy Buddha preached because Buddha 715 00:37:09,200 --> 00:37:11,919 Speaker 1: wanted to change the institutions of that time, the way 716 00:37:11,920 --> 00:37:15,600 Speaker 1: the rich and the poor were. Moses wanted to free 717 00:37:15,600 --> 00:37:19,440 Speaker 1: his people. Mohammad wanted to conquer and spread Islam to 718 00:37:19,480 --> 00:37:23,600 Speaker 1: the world. Paramahansa Yogananda came to America to spread the 719 00:37:23,640 --> 00:37:26,800 Speaker 1: wisdom of India. All of these people had a vision 720 00:37:26,840 --> 00:37:30,360 Speaker 1: for a future they wanted to create, and that's really important. 721 00:37:30,480 --> 00:37:34,799 Speaker 1: Mother Teresa wanted to feed millions of people. So if 722 00:37:34,840 --> 00:37:38,640 Speaker 1: you really want to practice your spiritualness, you can't just 723 00:37:38,719 --> 00:37:40,799 Speaker 1: be sitting on your meditation cushion. You got to have 724 00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:42,960 Speaker 1: a vision for the future. That's what phase for us 725 00:37:43,000 --> 00:37:45,600 Speaker 1: about now. To answer your question, how much should you 726 00:37:45,640 --> 00:37:48,960 Speaker 1: be specific? How much should you be unspecific? Well, it 727 00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:52,319 Speaker 1: depends on what you're manifesting. So now we can get 728 00:37:52,360 --> 00:37:56,240 Speaker 1: into a little bit deeper spiritual ideas. My friend Marie Diamond, 729 00:37:56,480 --> 00:37:59,320 Speaker 1: who was a brilliant spiritual teacher from Belgium and someone 730 00:37:59,320 --> 00:38:03,200 Speaker 1: I train with Maurice, says that what we manifest in 731 00:38:03,200 --> 00:38:06,160 Speaker 1: the world comes from three different parts of our being. 732 00:38:06,600 --> 00:38:09,479 Speaker 1: There resigned tension, which is what we desire, but that's 733 00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:13,320 Speaker 1: only one third. Then there is a destiny, which is 734 00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:17,480 Speaker 1: what our soul wants to experience. That's one third. And 735 00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:20,800 Speaker 1: then the third piece is the energy of the world 736 00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:24,320 Speaker 1: around us, our home, you know, the Chinese called this functua. 737 00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:28,560 Speaker 1: The people group, consciousness, our culture, our society. It's all 738 00:38:28,680 --> 00:38:32,200 Speaker 1: three of these. So if you think of manifesting, you're 739 00:38:32,239 --> 00:38:35,800 Speaker 1: a car going down a highway. Okay, that's your life. 740 00:38:36,360 --> 00:38:39,120 Speaker 1: All of us have a destiny. And in a spiritual 741 00:38:39,120 --> 00:38:41,920 Speaker 1: teacher explained this to me. He said, vision, you can't 742 00:38:41,920 --> 00:38:45,319 Speaker 1: go for the exit ram. You're on one highway. Your 743 00:38:45,400 --> 00:38:48,600 Speaker 1: highway is to spread consciousness, true education. You can't go 744 00:38:48,680 --> 00:38:50,640 Speaker 1: on that exit ram and go into a different direction. 745 00:38:50,719 --> 00:38:53,399 Speaker 1: That's your highway. And I've noticed this about my life. 746 00:38:53,440 --> 00:38:58,280 Speaker 1: Every adventure I've tried outside this zone of spreading wisdom 747 00:38:58,320 --> 00:39:02,160 Speaker 1: and consciousness fails. It just becomes unnecessarily hard. If I 748 00:39:02,200 --> 00:39:04,640 Speaker 1: stick on my highway, I go super fast. So that 749 00:39:04,760 --> 00:39:08,600 Speaker 1: highway is the destiny. Within that highway, you can change lanes, 750 00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:11,760 Speaker 1: that's your intention. You can change lanes. You can go faster, 751 00:39:11,840 --> 00:39:13,319 Speaker 1: you can go slower, you can go left, you can 752 00:39:13,360 --> 00:39:16,520 Speaker 1: go right. And then that's the quality of the traffic. 753 00:39:17,080 --> 00:39:19,640 Speaker 1: Is it stuck? Is the traffic moving easily is the 754 00:39:19,680 --> 00:39:23,000 Speaker 1: traffic congested. That's the group consciousness around you. So that's 755 00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:26,000 Speaker 1: just an analogy to understand this. So when you're manifesting, 756 00:39:26,040 --> 00:39:29,759 Speaker 1: all three of these pieces are coming together now in 757 00:39:29,800 --> 00:39:31,680 Speaker 1: the sixth space. If you go deeper into the wisdom 758 00:39:31,719 --> 00:39:34,799 Speaker 1: of how it's designed, the protocol is designed to take 759 00:39:34,840 --> 00:39:37,239 Speaker 1: all three of these into account. But in phase for 760 00:39:37,440 --> 00:39:41,279 Speaker 1: what you're doing is you're playing with intention, intention, but 761 00:39:41,400 --> 00:39:45,040 Speaker 1: also leaving things open for the universe to bring you. 762 00:39:45,440 --> 00:39:47,480 Speaker 1: For example, if you want to meet your soulmate, you 763 00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:50,480 Speaker 1: don't want to get super specific because what if your 764 00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:53,000 Speaker 1: soulmate is in a different age or a different body 765 00:39:53,000 --> 00:39:56,680 Speaker 1: type than what you think you want. Michael Beckwitt, the 766 00:39:56,760 --> 00:40:02,080 Speaker 1: spiritual teacher, calls this mature versus immature. One. Immature wanting is, oh, 767 00:40:02,200 --> 00:40:04,839 Speaker 1: I want I only want to be with someone who 768 00:40:04,920 --> 00:40:10,520 Speaker 1: is tall and blond and blue eyed. That's what maybe 769 00:40:10,600 --> 00:40:13,880 Speaker 1: society or what you read in a magazine influenced you. 770 00:40:14,640 --> 00:40:17,520 Speaker 1: Mature wanting is knowing that your soulmate may come to 771 00:40:17,520 --> 00:40:19,520 Speaker 1: you in many different forms, and it's going to be 772 00:40:19,520 --> 00:40:22,800 Speaker 1: an essence and energy that's going to spot that loving you. Likewise, 773 00:40:22,840 --> 00:40:25,560 Speaker 1: when it comes to our mission vision. Sometimes we don't 774 00:40:25,600 --> 00:40:28,200 Speaker 1: know what the universe has set fought for us. And 775 00:40:28,280 --> 00:40:32,120 Speaker 1: so when you are practicing Phase four, the important thing 776 00:40:32,120 --> 00:40:34,239 Speaker 1: that we ask people to keep in mind is to 777 00:40:34,320 --> 00:40:37,680 Speaker 1: focus on the what and the why. That to park 778 00:40:37,760 --> 00:40:41,799 Speaker 1: aside the how, the when, and the who. So that's 779 00:40:41,840 --> 00:40:45,720 Speaker 1: advice from Esther Hicks. The what and the why. Don't 780 00:40:45,760 --> 00:40:48,399 Speaker 1: worry about the when, When is it going to come? 781 00:40:48,960 --> 00:40:50,680 Speaker 1: Who is going to bring me or who's going to 782 00:40:50,719 --> 00:40:52,520 Speaker 1: be my soulmate or who's going to give me that job? 783 00:40:53,040 --> 00:40:54,719 Speaker 1: And the how? How am I going to get that? 784 00:40:54,800 --> 00:40:57,080 Speaker 1: How am I going to meet that? Persons to says, 785 00:40:57,120 --> 00:40:59,839 Speaker 1: all of that ads resistance to that which we see 786 00:41:00,000 --> 00:41:04,640 Speaker 1: to manifest. The what and the why add forward momentum. 787 00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:07,759 Speaker 1: So you focus on that. I love that. Yeah, I've 788 00:41:08,000 --> 00:41:11,200 Speaker 1: I've always realized that you'll get to where you want 789 00:41:11,239 --> 00:41:13,840 Speaker 1: in life, just not in the way you imagine this. Yeah. 790 00:41:13,880 --> 00:41:17,120 Speaker 1: And the problem is we have this projection and imagination 791 00:41:17,200 --> 00:41:21,560 Speaker 1: of how the path should look right, not why we 792 00:41:21,600 --> 00:41:24,520 Speaker 1: want it or where we're going right, and our paths change, 793 00:41:24,600 --> 00:41:27,960 Speaker 1: we pierce different circles of purpose. You will once a 794 00:41:28,000 --> 00:41:31,319 Speaker 1: monk and then you became a storyteller, and then now 795 00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:34,239 Speaker 1: you have this incredible podcast, and now you're launching a 796 00:41:34,280 --> 00:41:38,960 Speaker 1: tea company. You've pierced different circles of purpose with your 797 00:41:38,960 --> 00:41:42,680 Speaker 1: purpose to help the world getting bigger and bigger each time, 798 00:41:43,000 --> 00:41:44,640 Speaker 1: and all of us are going to go through that. 799 00:41:44,760 --> 00:41:47,480 Speaker 1: We are not one thing. Yeah, And I love that 800 00:41:47,560 --> 00:41:54,360 Speaker 1: idea because I think for me, when we create and 801 00:41:54,560 --> 00:41:59,880 Speaker 1: associate with identities early in our lives, it becomes harder 802 00:41:59,880 --> 00:42:02,479 Speaker 1: and harder to shake them. So I became a monk 803 00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:05,680 Speaker 1: from age round twenty one twenty two for three years, 804 00:42:06,640 --> 00:42:10,800 Speaker 1: and that was a young time to create a very distinct, 805 00:42:10,920 --> 00:42:15,359 Speaker 1: specific identity and shaking it off took a lot of 806 00:42:15,560 --> 00:42:18,839 Speaker 1: effort to allow myself to keep the parts that were 807 00:42:18,920 --> 00:42:22,640 Speaker 1: still me, but then to accept the new parts that 808 00:42:22,800 --> 00:42:26,680 Speaker 1: were parts that maybe I'd negated or neglected, and to 809 00:42:26,719 --> 00:42:30,960 Speaker 1: rebecome and to evolve took so much effort. And even now, 810 00:42:31,000 --> 00:42:36,600 Speaker 1: like I find allowing yourself to become new things it's 811 00:42:36,640 --> 00:42:39,040 Speaker 1: probably one of the biggest challenges in the world because 812 00:42:39,080 --> 00:42:41,120 Speaker 1: most of us are like, oh, I've always been an accountant, 813 00:42:41,120 --> 00:42:43,040 Speaker 1: I've always been a lawyer, I've always been a doctor, 814 00:42:43,200 --> 00:42:45,680 Speaker 1: and usually we just use our job titles to define it. 815 00:42:45,960 --> 00:42:48,160 Speaker 1: And I was actually having this conversation with one of 816 00:42:48,200 --> 00:42:50,360 Speaker 1: my team members earlier today. She was saying that before 817 00:42:50,440 --> 00:42:52,560 Speaker 1: she worked with us, she had never worked on a 818 00:42:52,560 --> 00:42:54,600 Speaker 1: book or a book tour, you know, and we work 819 00:42:54,680 --> 00:42:57,000 Speaker 1: your mind right now. And I was like, that's what 820 00:42:57,080 --> 00:42:59,279 Speaker 1: I love about it, Like, I don't care that you 821 00:42:59,360 --> 00:43:01,560 Speaker 1: haven't done that. I'm interested in how you think and 822 00:43:01,640 --> 00:43:04,520 Speaker 1: how you approach problems. And I'm intrigued by the fact 823 00:43:04,560 --> 00:43:06,640 Speaker 1: that you don't know the rules of this industry. Like 824 00:43:06,719 --> 00:43:10,440 Speaker 1: that excites me. How can people find the courage and 825 00:43:10,560 --> 00:43:14,319 Speaker 1: strength to become new things and not feel held back 826 00:43:14,360 --> 00:43:17,680 Speaker 1: by old things. One of the most most powerful practices 827 00:43:17,680 --> 00:43:20,359 Speaker 1: I've found is the Lifebook protocol, and we talk about 828 00:43:20,400 --> 00:43:23,800 Speaker 1: it in the book. So Lifebook is a goal setting 829 00:43:23,800 --> 00:43:26,440 Speaker 1: protocol by John and Missi Pucher in the spirit of 830 00:43:26,520 --> 00:43:29,600 Speaker 1: open this mind Value a quiet the company the majority 831 00:43:29,680 --> 00:43:31,520 Speaker 1: stake in the company. We're now merging it with mind 832 00:43:31,560 --> 00:43:34,839 Speaker 1: Value because we wanted I felt it's the best goal 833 00:43:34,880 --> 00:43:37,720 Speaker 1: setting system in the world, and we wanted to integrate 834 00:43:37,800 --> 00:43:41,920 Speaker 1: it with our education platform. Now. In Lifebook, one of 835 00:43:41,960 --> 00:43:43,799 Speaker 1: the exercises you do is you look at your life 836 00:43:43,800 --> 00:43:47,880 Speaker 1: from twelve different buckets. Right, your emotional life is one bucket, 837 00:43:48,160 --> 00:43:51,240 Speaker 1: your financial life is one bucket, your character is one bucket. 838 00:43:51,520 --> 00:43:53,440 Speaker 1: And already if you think about that, you find that 839 00:43:53,480 --> 00:43:56,200 Speaker 1: most people tend to focus on just a few limiting buckets, 840 00:43:56,200 --> 00:44:00,319 Speaker 1: to focus on goals for finance, goals for relationships, goals 841 00:44:00,320 --> 00:44:03,239 Speaker 1: for work. But are we setting goals for the emotions 842 00:44:03,239 --> 00:44:05,120 Speaker 1: we want to experience in a day to day basis 843 00:44:05,640 --> 00:44:08,000 Speaker 1: an emotional mastery? Are we setting goals for the character 844 00:44:08,280 --> 00:44:09,640 Speaker 1: how we want to show up as a man or 845 00:44:09,680 --> 00:44:11,879 Speaker 1: woman in the world. Life Book makes you go deep. 846 00:44:12,280 --> 00:44:14,120 Speaker 1: You really have to think about it, and at the 847 00:44:14,200 --> 00:44:16,200 Speaker 1: end you end up with a hundred page vision for 848 00:44:16,280 --> 00:44:19,040 Speaker 1: your life. Now within that hundred page vision, they are 849 00:44:19,040 --> 00:44:20,720 Speaker 1: going to be things which are going to be unclear, 850 00:44:21,160 --> 00:44:23,960 Speaker 1: and that's when the magic happens. So I remember when 851 00:44:23,960 --> 00:44:27,480 Speaker 1: I was doing Lifebook in two ten, there was a 852 00:44:27,520 --> 00:44:30,880 Speaker 1: particular category of the twelve categories called quality of life. 853 00:44:31,040 --> 00:44:33,280 Speaker 1: And this is really where you put down your lifestyle, 854 00:44:33,400 --> 00:44:36,840 Speaker 1: your home. And so I put down some really crazy 855 00:44:36,920 --> 00:44:39,040 Speaker 1: things because they push you to dream big. I wasn't 856 00:44:39,080 --> 00:44:40,400 Speaker 1: a speaker then, and I said I want to be 857 00:44:40,440 --> 00:44:42,960 Speaker 1: speaking on stages around the world. I want a vacation 858 00:44:43,000 --> 00:44:45,840 Speaker 1: in five style resorts around the world. I want inspiring friends. 859 00:44:45,880 --> 00:44:48,279 Speaker 1: I want to go on trips with inspiring friends. I 860 00:44:48,320 --> 00:44:50,600 Speaker 1: put down even some really light gold things. I want 861 00:44:50,600 --> 00:44:54,719 Speaker 1: to win an Emmy or a Grammy or an Academy award, whatever. Yeah, 862 00:44:55,239 --> 00:44:59,440 Speaker 1: what happened is ten months after doing life books, I 863 00:44:59,480 --> 00:45:03,080 Speaker 1: certainly at this weird impulse. It came from my soul. 864 00:45:03,160 --> 00:45:06,040 Speaker 1: Back then, I was running a dot com. I'd started 865 00:45:06,040 --> 00:45:08,160 Speaker 1: the dot com, I'd raised two million dollars in venture 866 00:45:08,160 --> 00:45:10,520 Speaker 1: capital money. It wasn't mind value. It was more like 867 00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:12,759 Speaker 1: an e commerce play, like a group on clone for 868 00:45:12,800 --> 00:45:16,720 Speaker 1: Southeast Asia. And I was feeling so dissatisfied. I realized 869 00:45:16,760 --> 00:45:20,319 Speaker 1: I'd been chasing and immature wanting. I'd been chasing all 870 00:45:20,320 --> 00:45:23,000 Speaker 1: of that stuff I was reading about in tech publications 871 00:45:23,000 --> 00:45:25,080 Speaker 1: and thinking I wanted to be one of those entrepreneurs. 872 00:45:25,400 --> 00:45:27,480 Speaker 1: But it wasn't for me, and so I gave up 873 00:45:27,520 --> 00:45:29,680 Speaker 1: my shares. I quit that dot com, and then I 874 00:45:29,719 --> 00:45:32,640 Speaker 1: needed to do something. This was twenty ten, and I thought, 875 00:45:33,080 --> 00:45:35,359 Speaker 1: I want to learn surfing. What if I could get 876 00:45:35,360 --> 00:45:37,279 Speaker 1: two hundred and fifty people to join me in a 877 00:45:37,360 --> 00:45:40,600 Speaker 1: beach in Costa Rica, put on a little festival where 878 00:45:40,640 --> 00:45:43,560 Speaker 1: we can all study surfing, maybe have some personal growth talks, 879 00:45:43,560 --> 00:45:45,879 Speaker 1: and maybe really have some great bonding events at night. 880 00:45:46,640 --> 00:45:51,319 Speaker 1: That random idear became a festival called afs Afst. That 881 00:45:51,520 --> 00:45:55,120 Speaker 1: first festival sold out, it blew up, and then it 882 00:45:55,160 --> 00:45:57,600 Speaker 1: continued growing and growing and growing, and within two years, 883 00:45:57,680 --> 00:45:59,719 Speaker 1: everything I put in my life book came true. All 884 00:45:59,719 --> 00:46:01,160 Speaker 1: of us sadden and I was speaking on stage. All 885 00:46:01,200 --> 00:46:03,040 Speaker 1: of a sudden, I had all of these amazing people, 886 00:46:03,480 --> 00:46:06,520 Speaker 1: Lisa Nichols, Chip Conley, all coming and speaking on stage 887 00:46:06,520 --> 00:46:09,440 Speaker 1: with me. I had the inspiring friends. All of a sudden, 888 00:46:09,440 --> 00:46:11,319 Speaker 1: I was staying in these five style resorts around the 889 00:46:11,320 --> 00:46:14,200 Speaker 1: world hotels. We're giving me the presidential suite because I 890 00:46:14,200 --> 00:46:17,400 Speaker 1: was bringing two hundred and fifty people to their property 891 00:46:17,400 --> 00:46:20,360 Speaker 1: in Costa Rica, in Mexico. And the craziest thing was 892 00:46:20,400 --> 00:46:22,560 Speaker 1: this I puttan. I wanted to win an Emmy. While 893 00:46:22,640 --> 00:46:25,280 Speaker 1: Nick Nanton, a film producer, came to one of our afest. 894 00:46:25,719 --> 00:46:28,720 Speaker 1: He turned it into a documentary called Live Your Quest, 895 00:46:29,040 --> 00:46:32,120 Speaker 1: and it won an Emmy. It won an Emmy, and 896 00:46:32,160 --> 00:46:34,880 Speaker 1: I was the producer, And so all of these crazy 897 00:46:34,920 --> 00:46:37,719 Speaker 1: goals came true. No where did I put I want 898 00:46:37,760 --> 00:46:40,960 Speaker 1: to invent a festival. Rather I described the life I 899 00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:44,840 Speaker 1: wanted to lead, the quality of life, and the idea 900 00:46:45,120 --> 00:46:48,960 Speaker 1: came to me. And there's an important lesson here. Sometimes 901 00:46:49,360 --> 00:46:52,440 Speaker 1: you don't want to put down the job, your business, 902 00:46:52,560 --> 00:46:55,760 Speaker 1: your job, your career is nothing more than a vehicle 903 00:46:56,239 --> 00:46:58,680 Speaker 1: for your growth and the life that you want to lead. 904 00:47:00,120 --> 00:47:02,080 Speaker 1: Most people get more clear on the job I want 905 00:47:02,080 --> 00:47:04,239 Speaker 1: to be a lawyer than they do on how they 906 00:47:04,280 --> 00:47:06,120 Speaker 1: want to grow and the quality of the life they 907 00:47:06,120 --> 00:47:08,480 Speaker 1: want to lead. Flip it around. You got to get 908 00:47:08,520 --> 00:47:11,120 Speaker 1: really clear on the lifestyle. How many hours do you 909 00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:12,840 Speaker 1: want to work, what do you want to do first 910 00:47:12,840 --> 00:47:14,640 Speaker 1: thing in the morning, Who do you want to be with, 911 00:47:14,880 --> 00:47:16,160 Speaker 1: how much time do you want to be able to 912 00:47:16,160 --> 00:47:18,279 Speaker 1: spend with your kids? Who are your friends? Where do 913 00:47:18,320 --> 00:47:21,480 Speaker 1: you want to live? Get clear on the quality of life, 914 00:47:22,120 --> 00:47:26,360 Speaker 1: get clear on the values you want to have, and 915 00:47:26,840 --> 00:47:30,560 Speaker 1: the ideal job will follow. Yeah, And I think that 916 00:47:30,560 --> 00:47:34,920 Speaker 1: that getting clear on the quality of life, and then 917 00:47:35,120 --> 00:47:37,680 Speaker 1: those steps that are there to make sure that you 918 00:47:37,719 --> 00:47:40,880 Speaker 1: show that priority in a small way, like I find that, 919 00:47:40,960 --> 00:47:42,960 Speaker 1: don't you find that everything that happened in a big 920 00:47:42,960 --> 00:47:45,759 Speaker 1: way in your life was because at one point it 921 00:47:45,800 --> 00:47:49,040 Speaker 1: was a small priority. Like I worked at a big 922 00:47:49,080 --> 00:47:53,080 Speaker 1: consulting firm, and I would use all my vacation that 923 00:47:53,160 --> 00:47:56,520 Speaker 1: I got to spend time with my spiritual teachers. This 924 00:47:56,600 --> 00:47:58,880 Speaker 1: is after I left the monastery. I would spend all 925 00:47:58,920 --> 00:48:00,839 Speaker 1: of it like, so I wouldn't take a vacation because 926 00:48:00,840 --> 00:48:02,640 Speaker 1: I was like, my priority is to still learn, to 927 00:48:02,680 --> 00:48:05,520 Speaker 1: still grow, to still think like a monk at this 928 00:48:05,560 --> 00:48:07,440 Speaker 1: point in my life, even though I'm not a monk anymore. 929 00:48:07,600 --> 00:48:10,440 Speaker 1: Because I was so scared of losing that deep important 930 00:48:10,480 --> 00:48:12,120 Speaker 1: part of my life that I was like, all right, 931 00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:13,719 Speaker 1: all the vacation, I get this one. I'm going to 932 00:48:13,800 --> 00:48:16,880 Speaker 1: do with it. And now I'm so grateful that some 933 00:48:16,920 --> 00:48:18,640 Speaker 1: of them will come live with me here, some of 934 00:48:18,640 --> 00:48:20,640 Speaker 1: them I'll get to travel too. And but it's like, 935 00:48:20,680 --> 00:48:22,400 Speaker 1: because at that time it was hard to make that 936 00:48:22,480 --> 00:48:26,399 Speaker 1: a priority, I had to sacrifice in one sense that 937 00:48:26,440 --> 00:48:28,319 Speaker 1: this is what I was using my vacation for. So 938 00:48:28,960 --> 00:48:33,480 Speaker 1: what I'm interested in vission is what defines for you 939 00:48:33,640 --> 00:48:37,919 Speaker 1: now a good meditation? What is a satisfying meditation? Because 940 00:48:37,920 --> 00:48:40,440 Speaker 1: I think this is like a recurring challenge that all 941 00:48:40,520 --> 00:48:43,719 Speaker 1: meditation and guides have is that people are like, well, 942 00:48:43,719 --> 00:48:45,560 Speaker 1: did I do well? Like did I do good? Because 943 00:48:45,560 --> 00:48:49,240 Speaker 1: we only know we don't. We've forgotten how to experience, 944 00:48:49,280 --> 00:48:51,280 Speaker 1: we only know how to evaluate. That's what I've realized. 945 00:48:51,280 --> 00:48:55,600 Speaker 1: The human mind has diminished in its ability to experience 946 00:48:56,080 --> 00:48:59,520 Speaker 1: and increased in its ability to evaluate. And our evaluation 947 00:48:59,640 --> 00:49:02,640 Speaker 1: is this was either good or this was bad, rather 948 00:49:02,680 --> 00:49:06,680 Speaker 1: than this was my experience. So how do you define 949 00:49:06,719 --> 00:49:10,120 Speaker 1: what a satisfying positive meditation is today? So I look 950 00:49:10,160 --> 00:49:13,160 Speaker 1: at the six qualities of the six phase and at 951 00:49:13,160 --> 00:49:16,440 Speaker 1: the end of the day, did these qualities express themselves 952 00:49:16,440 --> 00:49:18,799 Speaker 1: in my life? Was I kind and compassionate today? So 953 00:49:18,840 --> 00:49:21,120 Speaker 1: at the end of the night you can, basically before 954 00:49:21,160 --> 00:49:23,600 Speaker 1: going to sleep, you can ask yourself these six questions, 955 00:49:23,600 --> 00:49:27,480 Speaker 1: who did I help today? That relates to compassion. The 956 00:49:27,520 --> 00:49:31,279 Speaker 1: second question is what was something that truly made me 957 00:49:31,719 --> 00:49:34,279 Speaker 1: come alive that made me happy today? That relates to 958 00:49:34,320 --> 00:49:37,440 Speaker 1: Phase two, which is on gratitude. The third one is 959 00:49:37,880 --> 00:49:41,719 Speaker 1: what have I come to learn? And come to learn 960 00:49:42,040 --> 00:49:45,600 Speaker 1: often relates to forgiveness true forgiveness. We often learn what 961 00:49:45,920 --> 00:49:47,960 Speaker 1: is a new vision or a new desire that I 962 00:49:48,000 --> 00:49:49,960 Speaker 1: saw today that I want to bring into my life. 963 00:49:50,080 --> 00:49:52,880 Speaker 1: That comes from Phase four, which is vision for the future. 964 00:49:53,080 --> 00:49:55,319 Speaker 1: Now Phase five is commanding your perfect day. So what 965 00:49:55,360 --> 00:49:58,400 Speaker 1: you may ask at phase five is what was my 966 00:49:58,480 --> 00:50:01,480 Speaker 1: favorite part of today? And then the final one, Phase 967 00:50:01,520 --> 00:50:03,920 Speaker 1: six is a blessing. This is almost like a prayer. 968 00:50:04,280 --> 00:50:06,160 Speaker 1: And at the end of the day, you might ask 969 00:50:06,200 --> 00:50:09,000 Speaker 1: did I truly feel connected to God, to a higher power? 970 00:50:09,080 --> 00:50:11,680 Speaker 1: Did I feel that the universe had my back? Today? 971 00:50:12,080 --> 00:50:14,239 Speaker 1: And if you ask yourself those six questions, you know 972 00:50:14,400 --> 00:50:17,439 Speaker 1: you had a good six phase meditation. So again that's 973 00:50:17,480 --> 00:50:20,400 Speaker 1: just a lens I use. Yeah, No, I like that, 974 00:50:20,440 --> 00:50:23,480 Speaker 1: And I think it's useful to have some sort of 975 00:50:23,520 --> 00:50:26,560 Speaker 1: measuring stick because we all need to evaluate. But that's 976 00:50:26,560 --> 00:50:29,479 Speaker 1: a healthy evaluation as opposed to I think just saying 977 00:50:29,800 --> 00:50:32,719 Speaker 1: was it good or bad? Right, it's like irrelevant you 978 00:50:32,760 --> 00:50:35,839 Speaker 1: went in a direction there which I was interested in. 979 00:50:36,800 --> 00:50:39,239 Speaker 1: You're saying that the goal of meditation or the work 980 00:50:39,239 --> 00:50:41,280 Speaker 1: that you've done, you found that life is about growth 981 00:50:41,320 --> 00:50:44,120 Speaker 1: and the experience and the quality of life that you want. 982 00:50:44,600 --> 00:50:47,520 Speaker 1: I think a lot of people define their destiny quite 983 00:50:47,520 --> 00:50:50,239 Speaker 1: early on in life. How do you test the parameters 984 00:50:50,239 --> 00:50:52,960 Speaker 1: of your destiny? So I think one of the things 985 00:50:52,960 --> 00:50:54,600 Speaker 1: that I think is a useful tool is to want 986 00:50:54,600 --> 00:50:57,759 Speaker 1: to stand the difference between means goals and end goals. Right. 987 00:50:58,520 --> 00:51:01,520 Speaker 1: Very often, your destiny, the stuff that you're meant to 988 00:51:01,560 --> 00:51:04,719 Speaker 1: be doing, is something that you would do if you 989 00:51:04,719 --> 00:51:07,360 Speaker 1: would not have been getting paid for it. Very often 990 00:51:07,480 --> 00:51:11,600 Speaker 1: we do the opposite. Think about the standard American system. Right, 991 00:51:12,920 --> 00:51:14,960 Speaker 1: So you have people so that one of the most 992 00:51:14,960 --> 00:51:18,440 Speaker 1: common jobs that Americans go into is law. And I'm 993 00:51:18,480 --> 00:51:20,360 Speaker 1: not dishing on lawyers. I'm just using this as a 994 00:51:20,400 --> 00:51:22,360 Speaker 1: really interesting thing because I used to work in the 995 00:51:22,440 --> 00:51:25,000 Speaker 1: legal industry. I used to do a sell software to 996 00:51:25,160 --> 00:51:29,319 Speaker 1: law firms twenty percenting years back. So America has five 997 00:51:29,320 --> 00:51:33,200 Speaker 1: percent of the world's population, seventy percent of the world's lawyers. Why, well, 998 00:51:33,520 --> 00:51:35,920 Speaker 1: maybe it shows like Ellie Law or Ellie mcveil in 999 00:51:35,920 --> 00:51:38,879 Speaker 1: the nineteen nineties that glamorize law, and so so many 1000 00:51:38,920 --> 00:51:42,080 Speaker 1: Americans go into crazy amounts of study, crazy amounts of 1001 00:51:42,120 --> 00:51:45,239 Speaker 1: debt to become a lawyer, to pass the alstads, to 1002 00:51:45,360 --> 00:51:48,120 Speaker 1: join a good law firm. Then they are working crazy hours. 1003 00:51:48,160 --> 00:51:51,040 Speaker 1: But here's the thing. If you're a lawyer, you have 1004 00:51:51,080 --> 00:51:54,880 Speaker 1: a fifty percent statistical chance of suffering from clinical depression. 1005 00:51:55,600 --> 00:51:58,359 Speaker 1: It's crazy. So there's large number of Americans are going 1006 00:51:58,400 --> 00:52:01,600 Speaker 1: into a job that can make you depressed at an 1007 00:52:01,600 --> 00:52:05,239 Speaker 1: astonishing rate. But they do it why because they are 1008 00:52:05,280 --> 00:52:09,360 Speaker 1: following the herd. This is a classic example of immature wanting. 1009 00:52:09,600 --> 00:52:13,720 Speaker 1: You're wanting what everybody else wants, not what could truly 1010 00:52:13,840 --> 00:52:18,719 Speaker 1: resonate with your soul. And so the important thing is 1011 00:52:18,760 --> 00:52:22,040 Speaker 1: to really look at what would you do that even 1012 00:52:22,080 --> 00:52:24,919 Speaker 1: if you're not being paid. It's something that you would 1013 00:52:24,960 --> 00:52:28,200 Speaker 1: do anyway because it makes you come alive, and often 1014 00:52:28,280 --> 00:52:32,160 Speaker 1: that is the stepping stone to where your dream career 1015 00:52:32,200 --> 00:52:36,880 Speaker 1: could be. I was meditating, and I wanted to teach meditation, 1016 00:52:36,960 --> 00:52:38,640 Speaker 1: but I wanted to teach it because I was teaching 1017 00:52:38,680 --> 00:52:40,080 Speaker 1: it to my friends. I was teaching it to my 1018 00:52:40,120 --> 00:52:43,240 Speaker 1: cousins because I was so excited about it. I remember 1019 00:52:43,239 --> 00:52:45,040 Speaker 1: a teacher telling me you didn't never going to make 1020 00:52:45,080 --> 00:52:47,680 Speaker 1: money with that. You need to be an engineer. And 1021 00:52:47,719 --> 00:52:51,160 Speaker 1: I tried becoming an engineer. I was miserable, but with meditation, 1022 00:52:51,400 --> 00:52:54,800 Speaker 1: I built a massive, massive, massive company. I wrote hopefully 1023 00:52:54,880 --> 00:52:57,960 Speaker 1: my third New York Times bestseller because I was simply 1024 00:52:58,080 --> 00:52:59,800 Speaker 1: but I never did it for money. I was to 1025 00:53:00,120 --> 00:53:02,040 Speaker 1: it because it brought me joy. And if you look 1026 00:53:02,040 --> 00:53:04,120 Speaker 1: at so many of the most successful people in the world. 1027 00:53:04,440 --> 00:53:08,200 Speaker 1: They took what they did that brought them joy and 1028 00:53:08,320 --> 00:53:12,000 Speaker 1: they turned it into an incredible career. And that would 1029 00:53:12,000 --> 00:53:16,600 Speaker 1: be my advice to people, absolutely everyone. Vision Laciani the 1030 00:53:16,640 --> 00:53:20,200 Speaker 1: Six Phase Meditation Method makes you. You go and order 1031 00:53:20,239 --> 00:53:22,719 Speaker 1: your copy right now. The book breaks down how to 1032 00:53:22,760 --> 00:53:25,279 Speaker 1: practice each phase. I also want you to test it out, 1033 00:53:25,280 --> 00:53:27,960 Speaker 1: and I want you to tag me and Vision on Instagram, 1034 00:53:27,960 --> 00:53:31,239 Speaker 1: on TikTok, on Twitter, whatever platform you use, tag us 1035 00:53:31,239 --> 00:53:33,360 Speaker 1: and tell us what you learned, what you took away, 1036 00:53:33,440 --> 00:53:35,680 Speaker 1: what were the practical things that you're going to try. 1037 00:53:35,719 --> 00:53:38,640 Speaker 1: What was something new about meditation that you haven't learned before. 1038 00:53:38,680 --> 00:53:41,520 Speaker 1: I love seeing the nuggets of wisdom and the insights 1039 00:53:41,520 --> 00:53:44,239 Speaker 1: that you take away from these episodes. Vision. I'm going 1040 00:53:44,280 --> 00:53:45,680 Speaker 1: to ask you if there's anything else that you want 1041 00:53:45,719 --> 00:53:48,680 Speaker 1: to share that you haven't let you share this so 1042 00:53:48,680 --> 00:53:50,160 Speaker 1: you can get the book on Amazon, But if you 1043 00:53:50,360 --> 00:53:53,120 Speaker 1: get the book from mind valley dot com forward slash 1044 00:53:53,160 --> 00:53:56,000 Speaker 1: the letters six, there's this crazy bonus that you're going 1045 00:53:56,040 --> 00:53:57,920 Speaker 1: to get. Oh cool, okay, Like, even if you buy 1046 00:53:57,920 --> 00:53:59,319 Speaker 1: it from Amazon, you can get the bonus. Just go 1047 00:53:59,400 --> 00:54:01,399 Speaker 1: to mind valley dot com, forward slash to the letter six. 1048 00:54:02,040 --> 00:54:05,720 Speaker 1: Mind Valley has a meditation app with five hundred meditations, hypnotherapis, 1049 00:54:05,800 --> 00:54:08,600 Speaker 1: ambient sounds from all of these world class teachers. You 1050 00:54:08,640 --> 00:54:12,719 Speaker 1: get five hundred of those completely free, downloadable on your 1051 00:54:12,760 --> 00:54:14,919 Speaker 1: iPhone or your Android phone. When you get the book 1052 00:54:14,920 --> 00:54:16,879 Speaker 1: from mind valley dot com, forward slash to the letter 1053 00:54:16,920 --> 00:54:20,840 Speaker 1: six and it's only for this month. Okay, only for 1054 00:54:20,880 --> 00:54:23,759 Speaker 1: this month, so that's a great bonus. Vision, thank you 1055 00:54:23,840 --> 00:54:26,480 Speaker 1: so much for that. That's amazing. I hope that everyone's 1056 00:54:26,480 --> 00:54:29,280 Speaker 1: going to go try and test them out again. Please 1057 00:54:29,320 --> 00:54:31,880 Speaker 1: make sure you come back to on Purpose. I do 1058 00:54:31,920 --> 00:54:34,040 Speaker 1: want you to listen and read. I'm a big reader. 1059 00:54:34,080 --> 00:54:36,200 Speaker 1: I'm sure you can get the audiobook as well. Vision 1060 00:54:36,239 --> 00:54:38,600 Speaker 1: you read the audiobook, yes, so make sure you go 1061 00:54:38,640 --> 00:54:41,120 Speaker 1: and grab the audiobook if you're more of a listener. 1062 00:54:41,480 --> 00:54:43,520 Speaker 1: And thank you for being here on Purpose. I hope 1063 00:54:43,520 --> 00:54:45,479 Speaker 1: you're going follow Vision connect with all of his work. 1064 00:54:45,880 --> 00:54:48,120 Speaker 1: I subscribe to mind Value if you don't already, and 1065 00:54:48,200 --> 00:54:50,840 Speaker 1: we'll see you very very soon. Thank you everyone,