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Speaker 1: Hey guys, I'm Alie and I'm Rachel, and welcome to

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Speaker 1: Bachelor Happy Hour. This is officially Rachel's last podcast with

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Speaker 1: us before she becomes missus Abba Solo. How you feeling?

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Speaker 1: It's so weird to hear you say that. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I know I'm getting married. I feel very married already,

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Speaker 1: but to hear missus Abba Solo that I'm losing my

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Speaker 1: last name, just legally, not professionally. Oh really, so you're

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Speaker 1: gonna keep Lindsay professionally. Yeah, it's my excuses, it's on

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Speaker 1: all my degrees. Of course, I'm going to keep it.

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Speaker 1: It's just easier. It's just how people know me. But

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Speaker 1: I'm definitely going to take his last name. And we're

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Speaker 1: very excited. I mean, I'm I've spent all day to

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Speaker 1: day running around. They're getting my nails done, my eyebrows done,

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Speaker 1: my lashes. The only thing left is my hair. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's really an exciting time. I'm already packed, I'm ready

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Speaker 1: to go. Yeah. Oh my god, it's so exciting, like

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Speaker 1: so so so exciting. I hope, I hope it is

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Speaker 1: everything thing that you dreama. We're gonna miss you, I know.

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Speaker 1: Next week for the podcast You're not going to be here,

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Speaker 1: and I'm really gonna miss you. I'm nervous holding down

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Speaker 1: the form without you. She'll be fine. You're gonna be like,

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Speaker 1: who's that Rachel. I don't even meet her. Never. Never,

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Speaker 1: You'll be fantastic. No. I think everything is just going

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Speaker 1: to hit me when I actually get there, when I

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Speaker 1: get there and we start seeing family and friends and

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Speaker 1: just knowing that they're all there to celebrate us and

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Speaker 1: our love and and just the way that we found

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Speaker 1: each other, and you know, the odds were against us.

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Speaker 1: And I feel like I'm saying my vows right now,

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Speaker 1: so let me just stop. Oh no, keep going, keep going.

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Speaker 1: One thing I will say. One thing I wish I

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Speaker 1: did that I never did, is take more video on

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Speaker 1: my phone of me and Kevin, like the morning before

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Speaker 1: we got married, the morning we woke up after getting married,

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Speaker 1: like little just nuggets of us alone that I wish

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Speaker 1: I could look back on. So that's my piece of

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Speaker 1: advice to you. Take lots of video just for you

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Speaker 1: and Brian. Here you are again, Ali with the best advice.

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Speaker 1: I mean, okay, you guys. I don't know if you've

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Speaker 1: heard me say this before, but Ali gave me the

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Speaker 1: best advice. As I was going on to be the bachelorette,

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Speaker 1: she reached out to me. We talked, we communicated, and

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Speaker 1: she really just told me to sit back and enjoy

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Speaker 1: the moment because it's going to go by so fast,

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Speaker 1: among other things. But that's something that really stuck with me.

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Speaker 1: So to hear you come again with this wedding advice

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Speaker 1: and telling me to capture the moment but also enjoy it,

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Speaker 1: you know I'm going to do it again. Well. I

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Speaker 1: also think I told you to ignore Brian. I think

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Speaker 1: I told you to ignore the guy that you liked

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Speaker 1: the most. So I don't know, but we're so excited

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Speaker 1: for you, Rachel. We're gonna miss you so much and

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Speaker 1: I cannot wait for you to come back and give

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Speaker 1: us all the details on your just beautiful wedding day. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: the wedding, not the honeymoon. What happens in the honeymoon

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Speaker 1: stays in the honeymoon, Yes it does. We have an

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Speaker 1: amazing podcast today because we are talking to the one

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Speaker 1: and only Demi, one of my personal faves. I just

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Speaker 1: have to put that out there because they are far

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Speaker 1: and few between and Bachelor Nation for me, I am

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Speaker 1: so excited to talk to Demi. I am. I have

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Speaker 1: always loved her her, but very quickly become one of

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Speaker 1: her biggest fans, so I cannot wait to talk to her. Plus,

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Speaker 1: later on we're going to talk to Nicole as well,

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Speaker 1: I mean, Rachel. We have got to get her take

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Speaker 1: on the Jordan Christian fight because that was crazy. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: she had a front row seat. I know, slightly jealous.

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Speaker 1: Oh god, I would have been terrified. But I also

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Speaker 1: want to know. I want to talk to her about

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Speaker 1: her in Clay because it seems like they are really, really,

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Speaker 1: you know, in this for the long haul, it seems like.

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Speaker 1: But first we are going to be right back with

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Speaker 1: Demi right after this welcome back. We are here with Dimmi. Dimmi,

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Speaker 1: thank you so much for joining us today. We have

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Speaker 1: been eager to talk to you, and we're so glad

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Speaker 1: that you're joining us on Bachelor Happy Hour. We couldn't

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Speaker 1: be more excited. I'm so glad to be here, and

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Speaker 1: I'm so honored that y'all are fans of mine, considering

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Speaker 1: I fangirl over y'all all the time, the biggest fans truly,

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Speaker 1: Like when we found out that we were going to

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Speaker 1: get to happy on the podcast. It means so much

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Speaker 1: to us is we're we're not only fans of yours,

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Speaker 1: we're seeing what you're doing, and at least for me personally,

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Speaker 1: like I admire you so so much. I just want

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Speaker 1: to put that out there right now, like I might

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Speaker 1: have ten years on you, but like I look up

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Speaker 1: to you because what you are doing is incredible. I

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Speaker 1: hope you're so proud, and we're going to talk all

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Speaker 1: about that here today. First, how are you? Thank you

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Speaker 1: for being so sweet. That means a lot to me.

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Speaker 1: I mean it, thank you. I'm doing really good right now.

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Speaker 1: You know. I'm loving life. Just moved to La so

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Speaker 1: getting settled in, standing in my empty apartment with my

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Speaker 1: hands on my hips, not knowing what to do. But

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Speaker 1: everything's really good. I'm really happy. So is it true

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Speaker 1: you live like right next to Hannah, your best friend? Yes,

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Speaker 1: me and Hannah do have an apartment next to each other. No.

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Speaker 1: So funny because I didn't even know she lived there

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Speaker 1: whenever I was talking to the unit about or talking

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Speaker 1: to the apartment complex about the unit, and then I

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Speaker 1: realized on my location that she was in the same place.

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Speaker 1: I was like, you know, Shay location with your friends.

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Speaker 1: We were in the same place and I was like, Hannah,

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Speaker 1: do you live here? And we knew that we would

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Speaker 1: be able to live next to each other because we're

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Speaker 1: not the kind of friends who over invade each other's privacy,

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Speaker 1: like she knows, and I know we're not going to

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Speaker 1: each other's doors knocking like hey, good morning, Like no,

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Speaker 1: you'd better let me know before you come over here.

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Speaker 1: Like that is too funny. That's a true side of

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Speaker 1: like best friends that you just both chose the exact

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Speaker 1: same apartment complex and all of Los Angeles. I know,

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Speaker 1: it's so crazy, Like I knew I wanted to live

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Speaker 1: in either Sherman Oaks or Studio City, but there was

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Speaker 1: a lot of things I was looking for, Like I

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Speaker 1: was looking for somewhere with the townhouse because I have cats,

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Speaker 1: so I wanted stairs so they could run around on

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Speaker 1: the stairs and like get some good exercise. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: I was just crazy that the one place that I

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Speaker 1: ended up going with Hannah was next door. I love

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Speaker 1: you guys' friendship. And it's funny you say you're standing

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Speaker 1: around in an empty apartment, but you're definitely full in

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Speaker 1: company with your best friend. Being next door. I feel

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Speaker 1: like LA is a good place for you because you're

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Speaker 1: from Red Oak. Yeah right, Yeah, I'm familiar with Red Oak.

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Speaker 1: I'm from Dallas Oak Cliffe to be exact, so it's

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Speaker 1: not too far. Oh yeah, I grew up and I

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Speaker 1: feel like LA is way more fitting for your personality.

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Speaker 1: So how has it been just to move from the

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Speaker 1: small town of Red Oak to Los Angeles. It's been

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Speaker 1: crazy because as a kid, I always thought like LA

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Speaker 1: was way out of my league and stuff, and I

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Speaker 1: was just small town girl. So moving from Red Oak

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Speaker 1: where you know, it's funny that you say you know

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Speaker 1: redd Oak because Chris Harrison also knows Red Oak. He

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Speaker 1: used to go dove hunting out there and stuff like that.

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Speaker 1: So moving to such a bigger city it's a little

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Speaker 1: bit intimidating, but I know it's the best place for

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Speaker 1: me right now, and I feel like I've accomplished something

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Speaker 1: that I never dreamed of accomplishing, Like just moving to

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Speaker 1: LA seems like, oh, you're just moving to a bigger city,

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Speaker 1: not a big deal for most people. But I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I came from a tiny little town where nothing like

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Speaker 1: this was ever in anybody's capacity of accomplishing, so I

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Speaker 1: feel proud of myself. It's interesting that you say intimidating

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Speaker 1: because when I see you, Demmy, and it's one of

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Speaker 1: the things that I loved about you from Colton season,

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Speaker 1: and there weren't many things that I loved about Golden Season.

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Speaker 1: I loved that you seemed very self aware of who

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Speaker 1: you are, and you weren't afraid that you were maybe

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Speaker 1: the youngest person in the house. You know, you stood

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Speaker 1: your ground, you stood up for yourself. So to hear

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Speaker 1: that LA was a little intimidating for you, It's interesting,

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Speaker 1: and I think it shows our listeners that there's another

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Speaker 1: side of you, which we've also seen as we've watched Paradise.

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Speaker 1: But I know a lot of times we get typecasted

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Speaker 1: as were this person, and we don't have any other

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Speaker 1: sides of us, and so it's refreshing to hear you say, hey, guys,

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Speaker 1: sometimes I get intimidated too. Absolutely, I think that humans

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Speaker 1: have multiple facets to them, and there is a side

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Speaker 1: of me who is super bold and super funny and

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Speaker 1: you know, doesn't give a shit about anything, and I

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Speaker 1: just say whatever's on my mind. But there's still another

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Speaker 1: side of me who does feel, you know, insecure at times,

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Speaker 1: and I'm sure of herself and questions everything and is scared.

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Speaker 1: So I like that this time in Paradise I got

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Speaker 1: to explore that, whereas on The Bachelor it was more

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Speaker 1: focused on me being fun and bold and confident. But

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Speaker 1: just because you're fun, bold and confident doesn't mean that

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Speaker 1: you don't have the same issues that other people have,

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Speaker 1: like insecurities, in questioning yourself, etc. Etc. I feel like

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Speaker 1: that is a good segue into talking about Paradise. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I gotta tell you, when I watched, I was just

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Speaker 1: so proud of you. I don't I don't know if

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Speaker 1: you'd intended to impact lives like you are and are

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Speaker 1: going to continue, but I feel like you have really

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Speaker 1: changed the game for Bachelor, pard Ice. You will go

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Speaker 1: down in the history of the show as being like

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Speaker 1: a game changer. Did you know that being open about

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Speaker 1: being fluid on the show that it was going to

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Speaker 1: have this huge impact? Like, what what were you feeling

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Speaker 1: when you knew you were going to open about up

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Speaker 1: about your sexuality on the show? Well, I think it's

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Speaker 1: important to acknowledge the bravery that Jamie King had whenever

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Speaker 1: she came out as bisexual in the show, So you know,

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Speaker 1: I don't absolutely I don't want to claim that I

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Speaker 1: was the first one because she was and she walked

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Speaker 1: so I could run. Yes, thank you for Claren finding that.

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Speaker 1: You're absolutely right, And can I just say that Jamie

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Speaker 1: was on the season that I was wrong with Nick,

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Speaker 1: and I saw that people were commenting about that, and

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Speaker 1: I actually thought about that myself, and I think, Alie,

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Speaker 1: you and I actually talked about that too. Maybe it

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Speaker 1: was it was off the podcast, but I think the

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Speaker 1: differences and I just want to clarify because Jamie is

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Speaker 1: a friend, and I don't want to make it seem

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Speaker 1: like we aren't honoring what Jamie did and and honoring

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Speaker 1: her bravery and coming out in a way that we

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Speaker 1: haven't seen in this whole Bachelor world. But the difference

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Speaker 1: is that you know, Jamie was on there on the

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Speaker 1: show pursuing a heterosexual relationship. For the first time we

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Speaker 1: see that that's not the case, and you're the first

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Speaker 1: person to step out and do that. But you I

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Speaker 1: love the way you put it. She had to walk

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Speaker 1: so you could run exactly, Yes, Like this is the

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Speaker 1: first time we're seeing physical same sex relationship and no,

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Speaker 1: I never expected it. I honestly, at first, like I was,

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Speaker 1: I was scared. I was a little bit uncomfortable, and

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Speaker 1: I was like, I don't know how much I want

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Speaker 1: to like kiss her on camera, Like you know, whenever

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Speaker 1: she first got there, I was a little I mean,

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Speaker 1: whenever she first got there, I was like, I don't care,

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Speaker 1: I'm all over her. But you know, it gets a

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Speaker 1: little bit uncomfortable just because it's like something nobody's ever

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Speaker 1: seen before, and in the back of your mind and

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Speaker 1: whenever you haven't been out with this many people before,

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Speaker 1: you're thinking about are the cameramen thinking this is weird?

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Speaker 1: Are the audio guys weirded out by the fact that,

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Speaker 1: like it's a girl on girl right now. It's just

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Speaker 1: you kind of questioned everything, and it made me very,

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Speaker 1: very anxious. But I'm happy that I can at least

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Speaker 1: be somebody who people can relate to that are struggling

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Speaker 1: with the same things of being afraid to come out

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Speaker 1: because you know, for me, I came from a very

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Speaker 1: conservative family. All of my family there's not been a

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Speaker 1: single like gay person and any of my family, and

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Speaker 1: so coming out to millions all at once, it was

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Speaker 1: overwhelming and it was scary, but my heart knew that

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Speaker 1: that's what it wanted. So on the show, you talk

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Speaker 1: about opening up to your family and that they were

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Speaker 1: extremely supportive of you, and they were really great. I

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Speaker 1: think you said how long ago was that? So I

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Speaker 1: opened up to my family and I came out to

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Speaker 1: my dad and my stepmom right before the show. I

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Speaker 1: knew that I was going to talk about my previous

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Speaker 1: relationship that I had had back home before Paradise, and

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Speaker 1: I wanted them to hear it from me first, and

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Speaker 1: I'd been putting it off for so long because I

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Speaker 1: was so scared of their reaction because I do come

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Speaker 1: from a very conservative family and there's been nothing no

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Speaker 1: one's ever come out in my family before, so I

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Speaker 1: wanted to make sure that they heard it from me

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Speaker 1: instead of hearing it from you know, news articles or

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Speaker 1: spoilers and stuff like that. And it was really scary

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Speaker 1: because I didn't know how they would react, but they

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Speaker 1: couldn't have been more supportive. My dad and my stepmom,

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Speaker 1: they are the MVPs. They have made me feel nothing

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Speaker 1: less than I was before I told them. They made

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Speaker 1: me feel even better about it. And whenever I came

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Speaker 1: home from Paradise and I talked to them about everything,

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Speaker 1: open arms embracing me like it was incredible. I did

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Speaker 1: not feel anything except for DEMI like, I felt like

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Speaker 1: myself and fully myself, and I wasn't having to hid

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Speaker 1: that from them anymore. Do you think to me if

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Speaker 1: they had had a different reaction, that you wouldn't have

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Speaker 1: been able to go into Paradise and be as open

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Speaker 1: as you were. You know, with us as the viewers

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Speaker 1: watching it, cares so much about how they feel about me,

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Speaker 1: and you know, just making sure that they're happy and

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Speaker 1: they're comfortable. So if they would have been uncomfortable with it,

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Speaker 1: I think I would have probably held back. I care

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Speaker 1: about them more than anyone else in the world. They've

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Speaker 1: done everything for me and they've always been there for me.

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Speaker 1: But it proves to me that they are the people

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Speaker 1: that I hold to this standard of amazingness because they

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Speaker 1: reacted in the way that they did. Did they know

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Speaker 1: in what was the reaction? Did they know that you

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Speaker 1: were going to talk about it on Paradise and did

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Speaker 1: they were they worried about you? Because I feel like,

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Speaker 1: as a parent myself, if my daughter told me that

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Speaker 1: she was going to open up like this in such

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Speaker 1: a public platform where there's so much judgment. I'd be

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Speaker 1: so scared for her. What was the reaction. I did

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Speaker 1: not tell them I was going to talk about it

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Speaker 1: on Paradise. I just told them, you know, hey, I

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Speaker 1: mean I was bawling whenever I was telling them, and

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Speaker 1: I was like, I like boys and I like girls,

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Speaker 1: and I haven't told y'all for a long time because

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Speaker 1: I've been scared. And they were so supportive and amazing

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Speaker 1: about it. And my step mom was like, we kind

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Speaker 1: of figured, Oh, it's so funny because my stepmom, if

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00:14:26,520 --> 00:14:28,400
Speaker 1: she like looks really good, like you know, she gets

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00:14:28,440 --> 00:14:30,120
Speaker 1: all dressed up and stuff, I'll be like, oh my gosh,

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00:14:30,120 --> 00:14:32,320
Speaker 1: she looks so cute, and she'll be demmy, I'm taken.

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Speaker 1: Your family always knows they know you right. Yes, Well,

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Speaker 1: that's amazing that you have that support of them, and

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Speaker 1: I hope you feel and know that you have our

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Speaker 1: support obviously as well. Thank you. Can we talk about

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Speaker 1: Christian a little bit? Yeah? When can you tell us

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Speaker 1: about when you guys met. I don't remember the exact

291
00:14:49,520 --> 00:14:51,760
Speaker 1: day that we met. I just remember I was in

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Speaker 1: La doing something for the Bachelor, and I was at

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Speaker 1: Catherine Agro's house and I'm at her roommate, which was Christian,

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Speaker 1: And the first time we met, like it was all fun,

295
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Speaker 1: like friendly, of course, and I was like, this girl

296
00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:06,440
Speaker 1: is so cool, Like everyone loves her who meets her.

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Speaker 1: She's incredible. And I was like, yeah, this girl's super cool.

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Speaker 1: I had no idea her sexuality or I didn't know

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Speaker 1: anything about it. I didn't ask, that's not my place.

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Speaker 1: But then the next time I came out there, I

301
00:15:19,040 --> 00:15:23,240
Speaker 1: was there again, and I remember it was like a

302
00:15:23,320 --> 00:15:26,640
Speaker 1: late night and everyone was like talking about getting in

303
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Speaker 1: the hot tub, and so we were all like getting

304
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Speaker 1: ready for the hot tub, and everybody else fell asleep

305
00:15:30,560 --> 00:15:33,760
Speaker 1: except for me and Christian, and so we were just

306
00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:37,000
Speaker 1: saying out in the hot tub and then we just

307
00:15:37,080 --> 00:15:40,080
Speaker 1: you know, made out a little bit and stuff like that.

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Speaker 1: But it was She's unlike anyone you'll ever meet. She

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00:15:45,240 --> 00:15:49,040
Speaker 1: makes everybody around her feel good and feel special and

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Speaker 1: feel understood. She always puts everyone else before herself, and

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Speaker 1: it's very admirable and it's a beautiful quality to have.

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Speaker 1: She's just a really special person. Yeah, I mean, and

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Speaker 1: I think that was what was so beautiful about this

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Speaker 1: week is you know, we hear you talk about her,

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Speaker 1: but then we got to see her, and we got

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00:16:08,320 --> 00:16:10,640
Speaker 1: to see what it was that you see in her

317
00:16:10,680 --> 00:16:13,000
Speaker 1: at the same time. And then just for her to

318
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Speaker 1: come to be an outsider, to come to Paradise, this

319
00:16:16,120 --> 00:16:20,240
Speaker 1: crazy world, this bachelor world, to fight for you. I mean,

320
00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:23,400
Speaker 1: it really really says a lot without having to say

321
00:16:23,440 --> 00:16:27,520
Speaker 1: anything at all. Its yeah, yeah. I think a lot

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00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:30,280
Speaker 1: of people demmy want to know or they just want

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Speaker 1: to understand. And I always say that nobody can understand

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Speaker 1: a relationship like the two people that are in it.

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Speaker 1: You know, you can try to explain it, you can

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00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:41,600
Speaker 1: try to show them, but only the two people who

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Speaker 1: are actually experienced it get it. But people want to know,

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00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:48,400
Speaker 1: they want to understand. I guess what it was like

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00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:51,400
Speaker 1: with you and Christian before and your decision to come

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Speaker 1: on to Paradise, because we obviously know that you had

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Speaker 1: Christian support, But how did that conversation go When you

332
00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:03,160
Speaker 1: approach Christianny he said, hey, I'm going to go on Paradise.

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00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:07,720
Speaker 1: So whenever I met her, I already knew I was

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00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:09,880
Speaker 1: going to Paradise. I knew I was going to Paradise

335
00:17:10,119 --> 00:17:14,960
Speaker 1: for a long time, and I was always very hesitant

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00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:18,680
Speaker 1: about our relationship moving to the next level. We kept

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00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:22,920
Speaker 1: at very surface level. I wouldn't have very serious conversations

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00:17:22,920 --> 00:17:25,639
Speaker 1: with her, and if they were serious conversations, it was

339
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:27,960
Speaker 1: me explaining about why I don't want to be committed.

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00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:29,560
Speaker 1: And it wasn't just like, oh, because I'm going on

341
00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:32,760
Speaker 1: Bachelor Paradise. It was because I wasn't ready to commit.

342
00:17:32,880 --> 00:17:35,800
Speaker 1: I was I've been scared of commitment my whole life,

343
00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:40,760
Speaker 1: and it was just like, look, I'm doing me right now.

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00:17:41,119 --> 00:17:44,760
Speaker 1: If I get any further than where we're at in

345
00:17:44,800 --> 00:17:49,760
Speaker 1: this like platonic kind of casual dating setting, it's gonna

346
00:17:49,800 --> 00:17:52,280
Speaker 1: make me super anxious and I'm not ready for it,

347
00:17:52,440 --> 00:17:57,040
Speaker 1: and I don't know what I want to do. So

348
00:17:57,200 --> 00:18:01,359
Speaker 1: she just responded by obviously being supported, and I knew

349
00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:03,960
Speaker 1: that I didn't want to lose her, But I also

350
00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:06,280
Speaker 1: was upfront and honest with her about the fact that

351
00:18:06,359 --> 00:18:09,000
Speaker 1: I could go to Paradise and I could meet somebody

352
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:11,280
Speaker 1: else and fall in love with someone else, and I

353
00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:13,280
Speaker 1: don't know if you want to stick around for that

354
00:18:13,520 --> 00:18:18,360
Speaker 1: and that risk that you're taking. So you know, whatever

355
00:18:18,560 --> 00:18:20,879
Speaker 1: you want to do whenever I go there, that's up

356
00:18:20,880 --> 00:18:24,080
Speaker 1: to you. I don't expect you to just wait around

357
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Speaker 1: for me, and I'm not saying that I'm going to

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00:18:26,720 --> 00:18:30,359
Speaker 1: come back to you after this either. So were the

359
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:34,119
Speaker 1: two of you ever exclusive before you came to Paradise. No,

360
00:18:34,560 --> 00:18:37,280
Speaker 1: we were not exclusive. I think that we spent most

361
00:18:37,280 --> 00:18:41,000
Speaker 1: of our time together. I mean, we weren't really interested

362
00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:43,919
Speaker 1: in anyone else. But I was always very open and

363
00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:45,840
Speaker 1: up front about the fact that I'm going to go

364
00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:48,840
Speaker 1: to Paradise and I'm going to date other people, and

365
00:18:49,440 --> 00:18:51,760
Speaker 1: I understand if you're not okay with that, and then

366
00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:53,679
Speaker 1: if you're not okay with that, that's where we're going

367
00:18:53,720 --> 00:18:57,119
Speaker 1: to have to end everything. But she was okay with it.

368
00:18:57,160 --> 00:18:59,320
Speaker 1: She understood. She knew that there was going to be

369
00:18:59,359 --> 00:19:04,240
Speaker 1: that risk of not being with me losing me whenever

370
00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:07,639
Speaker 1: I went to Paradise, but it was always very open

371
00:19:07,720 --> 00:19:11,879
Speaker 1: and honest and there was nothing was hidden. It was

372
00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:17,040
Speaker 1: so we had so much communication about it that that's

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00:19:17,080 --> 00:19:19,359
Speaker 1: why I felt like it was okay for me to go.

374
00:19:19,720 --> 00:19:21,440
Speaker 1: We had to take a quick break, and I hate

375
00:19:21,440 --> 00:19:24,520
Speaker 1: breaking right here because I feel like there's our conversation

376
00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:26,359
Speaker 1: is flowing and it's so great to talk to you,

377
00:19:26,440 --> 00:19:27,840
Speaker 1: but we're gonna take a quick break and we'll be

378
00:19:27,920 --> 00:19:31,080
Speaker 1: right back. As if you were watching it, you could

379
00:19:31,160 --> 00:19:33,720
Speaker 1: tell the love that you guys have for each other.

380
00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:37,040
Speaker 1: And I don't know if it's something like maybe you

381
00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:39,959
Speaker 1: guys were both kind of lying to each other because

382
00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:44,200
Speaker 1: kind of like a Katie Chris situation where she didn't

383
00:19:44,280 --> 00:19:47,160
Speaker 1: want to say her full feelings because she was kind

384
00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:50,080
Speaker 1: of protecting herself and it was a defense mechanism, but

385
00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:53,159
Speaker 1: deep down inside, she didn't want him to go on

386
00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:55,479
Speaker 1: the date. And I feel like that's kind of what

387
00:19:55,480 --> 00:19:58,720
Speaker 1: we got between you and Christian. Christian really didn't want

388
00:19:58,720 --> 00:20:01,560
Speaker 1: you to go to Paradise, and your feelings were deeper

389
00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:04,080
Speaker 1: for Christian than you were willing to admit. Is that

390
00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:08,720
Speaker 1: what we were watching when we first saw you two together. Absolutely,

391
00:20:09,400 --> 00:20:12,720
Speaker 1: I had no idea she felt as strongly as she

392
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:17,320
Speaker 1: did before she came on to Paradise. That was the

393
00:20:17,359 --> 00:20:20,600
Speaker 1: first time that I had seen this super serious side

394
00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:23,600
Speaker 1: of her that was so committed to me. I had

395
00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:26,679
Speaker 1: no idea. And I also know that I suppressed a

396
00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:29,199
Speaker 1: lot of my feelings because that's what I do to

397
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:32,960
Speaker 1: prevent myself from losing control of my emotions. Like I

398
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:36,960
Speaker 1: said on the show. So I was so surprised to

399
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:41,440
Speaker 1: see that she felt so strongly about me, And I mean,

400
00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:43,879
Speaker 1: I was happy to know she felt that way, but

401
00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:45,840
Speaker 1: I also felt bad because I didn't realize that I

402
00:20:45,880 --> 00:20:49,440
Speaker 1: was hurting her by exploring my options. Well, I think

403
00:20:49,560 --> 00:20:52,240
Speaker 1: you know there's that saying, right, It's a very well

404
00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:55,280
Speaker 1: known saying distance makes the heart grow fonder. And the

405
00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:59,359
Speaker 1: reason that's saying is because it's so true and that

406
00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:02,720
Speaker 1: seems like it's exactly what happened in this scenario. I

407
00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:04,520
Speaker 1: think one thing to me as a viewer that was

408
00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:10,080
Speaker 1: very clear when watching is that there was no from Christian, Oh,

409
00:21:10,119 --> 00:21:12,200
Speaker 1: I didn't you know. I didn't know you were coming

410
00:21:12,200 --> 00:21:14,119
Speaker 1: here looking for a relationship, or I didn't know this

411
00:21:14,160 --> 00:21:18,080
Speaker 1: was happening. It was more just, oh, I'm hurt that

412
00:21:18,160 --> 00:21:21,880
Speaker 1: you actually were able to have another relationship. So for

413
00:21:21,920 --> 00:21:25,120
Speaker 1: me as a viewer, I understand why some people might

414
00:21:25,200 --> 00:21:28,359
Speaker 1: think it wasn't clear between you guys going in, but

415
00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:32,200
Speaker 1: not for me, because I just saw hurt that she

416
00:21:32,280 --> 00:21:34,600
Speaker 1: didn't understand how your heart could go there because her

417
00:21:34,640 --> 00:21:37,879
Speaker 1: feelings were very strong exactly, and I didn't know that

418
00:21:37,920 --> 00:21:40,200
Speaker 1: they were that strong. And the last thing I wanted

419
00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:42,439
Speaker 1: to do was hurt her, But at the same time,

420
00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:44,680
Speaker 1: my mind is working in this crazy way where I'm

421
00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:47,000
Speaker 1: kind of keeping these things separate. I was like, Okay,

422
00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:50,680
Speaker 1: Paradise is something that I am planning on doing. I'm

423
00:21:50,680 --> 00:21:54,000
Speaker 1: gonna go. I'm gonna do it. I've got this casual

424
00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:57,159
Speaker 1: relationship with someone who she's okay with me going. But

425
00:21:57,240 --> 00:21:59,560
Speaker 1: I never really took the time to ask her how

426
00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:02,480
Speaker 1: she felt about it, And of course I think she

427
00:22:02,560 --> 00:22:05,240
Speaker 1: just told me, like, you know, go do your thing,

428
00:22:05,280 --> 00:22:07,720
Speaker 1: like I support you, because she really liked me and

429
00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:12,320
Speaker 1: wanted to support me no matter what. And so that

430
00:22:12,560 --> 00:22:15,520
Speaker 1: is a perfect example of how our communication in the

431
00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:18,920
Speaker 1: real world it was so different than our communication in Paradise.

432
00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:24,080
Speaker 1: In Paradise, we actually had real conversations that we would

433
00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:29,240
Speaker 1: never have outside of Paradise just because I would avoid it.

434
00:22:29,760 --> 00:22:33,080
Speaker 1: And it's awesome that I got to actually have these

435
00:22:33,119 --> 00:22:37,160
Speaker 1: conversations and hear everything that she wanted to say, and

436
00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:40,040
Speaker 1: we could just kind of work things out that we

437
00:22:40,119 --> 00:22:44,800
Speaker 1: had been just kind of pushing to the side. Demi,

438
00:22:44,880 --> 00:22:48,439
Speaker 1: I actually love that you said that, because what people

439
00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:52,480
Speaker 1: don't understand about this world is that everything is heightened.

440
00:22:52,840 --> 00:22:56,560
Speaker 1: Everything is so intense, and you know, especially to bring

441
00:22:56,560 --> 00:22:59,400
Speaker 1: in somebody from the outside into this world is still

442
00:22:59,440 --> 00:23:02,360
Speaker 1: the exact same thing like you do feel I don't

443
00:23:02,359 --> 00:23:04,600
Speaker 1: want to say pressure, that's not the right word. But

444
00:23:04,720 --> 00:23:09,879
Speaker 1: everything is intensified because you don't have a phone, and

445
00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:12,159
Speaker 1: you don't have a TV, and you don't have the Internet,

446
00:23:12,200 --> 00:23:15,240
Speaker 1: and you just have each other and the real feelings

447
00:23:15,280 --> 00:23:18,040
Speaker 1: that you have with one another. I want to ask

448
00:23:18,080 --> 00:23:21,000
Speaker 1: you because this is all I kept thinking. I kept saying, Oh,

449
00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:23,280
Speaker 1: my gosh, what would I be thinking if this happened

450
00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:27,040
Speaker 1: to me When Chris Harrison walks down those stairs and

451
00:23:27,119 --> 00:23:29,440
Speaker 1: he comes and he gets you, and he's like, hey, demmy,

452
00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:31,320
Speaker 1: can I talk to you for a moment, Because we

453
00:23:31,359 --> 00:23:35,360
Speaker 1: all know when the god, our fairy godfather, Chris Harrison

454
00:23:35,440 --> 00:23:38,520
Speaker 1: walks down those stairs, we know that something big is

455
00:23:38,520 --> 00:23:42,400
Speaker 1: going to happen. What was your thought, because surely it wasn't. Oh,

456
00:23:42,520 --> 00:23:44,520
Speaker 1: Christian's waiting for me at the top of the stairs.

457
00:23:45,280 --> 00:23:48,800
Speaker 1: I thought that he was sending me home, like saying, like,

458
00:23:48,880 --> 00:23:52,080
Speaker 1: you know, go home and go get your woman. I

459
00:23:52,160 --> 00:23:55,119
Speaker 1: had no idea. I mean, I literally had chocolate on

460
00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:57,720
Speaker 1: my face and no makeup on, and I looked a

461
00:23:57,840 --> 00:24:00,840
Speaker 1: hot mess. I thought that I was going to go

462
00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:03,600
Speaker 1: up to those stairs and it would be my producers

463
00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:05,400
Speaker 1: that I worked with, and they'd be like, hey, let's

464
00:24:05,440 --> 00:24:08,120
Speaker 1: go get your girl, and you know, you guys can

465
00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:11,159
Speaker 1: be together if that's what you want. So whenever I

466
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:13,160
Speaker 1: saw that it was her at the top of the stairs, like,

467
00:24:13,600 --> 00:24:17,640
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, I was shaking. It was incredible. It

468
00:24:17,760 --> 00:24:21,600
Speaker 1: was oh, I can't even describe it. There's nothing I've

469
00:24:21,640 --> 00:24:24,160
Speaker 1: ever experienced like that in my life. And seeing her,

470
00:24:24,920 --> 00:24:26,879
Speaker 1: I know, I said in the episode, like that's the

471
00:24:26,920 --> 00:24:30,240
Speaker 1: moment that I knew and it truly is, like nobody's

472
00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:32,480
Speaker 1: ever made me that excited in my life to see them.

473
00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:35,480
Speaker 1: I bawled my eyes out when I saw you guys

474
00:24:35,520 --> 00:24:38,600
Speaker 1: see each other and just seeing the emotion there and

475
00:24:39,240 --> 00:24:41,919
Speaker 1: it was so beautiful. And when you looked beautiful, I

476
00:24:41,960 --> 00:24:46,359
Speaker 1: know you're saying that, like you, I saw you, and

477
00:24:46,520 --> 00:24:49,520
Speaker 1: like I saw you in your rass form, I saw

478
00:24:49,560 --> 00:24:53,320
Speaker 1: you for you, your natural beauty, beauty in your heart,

479
00:24:53,359 --> 00:24:55,280
Speaker 1: your love for this woman. I just I thought it

480
00:24:55,320 --> 00:24:57,440
Speaker 1: was one of the most beautiful moments I've ever seen

481
00:24:57,480 --> 00:25:00,800
Speaker 1: on television and in life. I'm sure just as beautiful.

482
00:25:01,119 --> 00:25:02,760
Speaker 1: I mean We've talked about this, Rachel, you and I

483
00:25:02,800 --> 00:25:07,320
Speaker 1: before about how Bachelor has had such a stereotypical like

484
00:25:07,400 --> 00:25:10,320
Speaker 1: relationship on the show or person. It's been like a

485
00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:12,080
Speaker 1: white guy and a white girl fall in love and

486
00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:14,399
Speaker 1: that's the show. It was that way for years and

487
00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:18,359
Speaker 1: now finally we're starting to see differences right different people,

488
00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:22,960
Speaker 1: diversity and relationships and ethnicity, all of that. So you

489
00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:24,640
Speaker 1: might even a thought, I mean, this is what would

490
00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:26,800
Speaker 1: have gone through my head if I were you, is that, oh,

491
00:25:26,840 --> 00:25:30,280
Speaker 1: they're not going to have a girl with girl relationship

492
00:25:30,320 --> 00:25:33,560
Speaker 1: on the show. Did you ever think that as well? Yeah,

493
00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:37,160
Speaker 1: I thought that it might push away some of their viewers,

494
00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:40,679
Speaker 1: so I thought that they wouldn't take that risk. I

495
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:42,600
Speaker 1: also thought that, you know, she's not a part of

496
00:25:43,320 --> 00:25:46,800
Speaker 1: Bachelor Nation, so why would she be there? And so

497
00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:49,640
Speaker 1: that made it all the more surprising for me. But

498
00:25:50,040 --> 00:25:54,800
Speaker 1: I love that the franchise is branching out and the

499
00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:58,280
Speaker 1: fact that Chris Harrison like made that happen and you know,

500
00:25:58,359 --> 00:26:00,600
Speaker 1: brought her there and everyone else that was behind it.

501
00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:04,720
Speaker 1: It's incredible and it shows like the forward movement that's

502
00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:08,679
Speaker 1: happening with Bachelor Nation right now. Yeah, I got a

503
00:26:08,720 --> 00:26:11,760
Speaker 1: piggyback on what you're saying, Demmy, because you know, and

504
00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:16,280
Speaker 1: we've talked about this, I was the first black bachelorette,

505
00:26:16,359 --> 00:26:20,600
Speaker 1: and so you know there obviously that there was progression

506
00:26:20,680 --> 00:26:24,159
Speaker 1: in that, and it was diversifying the audience and and

507
00:26:24,480 --> 00:26:26,840
Speaker 1: get and allowing the viewers to see someone who looks

508
00:26:26,880 --> 00:26:31,080
Speaker 1: a little bit different get love, which shouldn't be different

509
00:26:31,080 --> 00:26:33,119
Speaker 1: from anybody, no matter how you look or who you

510
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:37,240
Speaker 1: choose to decide to love. So I'm relishing in this

511
00:26:37,320 --> 00:26:41,280
Speaker 1: moment that you're having because I think that we need

512
00:26:41,320 --> 00:26:45,440
Speaker 1: to see this, to see a relationship where you're going

513
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:48,359
Speaker 1: after whoever it is that you choose to love, whether

514
00:26:48,359 --> 00:26:51,560
Speaker 1: it be a man or a woman. That's real life,

515
00:26:51,880 --> 00:26:54,840
Speaker 1: and it's time to wake people up and for them

516
00:26:54,920 --> 00:26:57,440
Speaker 1: to see it, and then to see your relationship with

517
00:26:57,520 --> 00:27:00,720
Speaker 1: Christian and to be so genuine in the all emotion.

518
00:27:01,080 --> 00:27:03,640
Speaker 1: I mean, I just it really I really felt it.

519
00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:06,600
Speaker 1: I really really did. And I one of the things

520
00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:08,240
Speaker 1: that I want to commend you on and Ali and

521
00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:12,040
Speaker 1: I talk about this is that you it also takes

522
00:27:12,160 --> 00:27:15,359
Speaker 1: the right person to be able to step out and

523
00:27:15,880 --> 00:27:19,960
Speaker 1: step up, and you truly are the right person to

524
00:27:20,040 --> 00:27:23,640
Speaker 1: do this, not everybody can handle, you know, the negativity

525
00:27:23,640 --> 00:27:26,040
Speaker 1: that may come their way. Not everybody may able to

526
00:27:26,080 --> 00:27:29,959
Speaker 1: handle just just being different, and you are handling it

527
00:27:30,080 --> 00:27:33,280
Speaker 1: so well, and we truly want to commend you for

528
00:27:33,320 --> 00:27:36,000
Speaker 1: that because it is beautiful to watch you do it.

529
00:27:36,040 --> 00:27:39,080
Speaker 1: Like I know, you're just doing you, but you're doing

530
00:27:39,119 --> 00:27:42,280
Speaker 1: you very well at the same time. Thank you so

531
00:27:42,400 --> 00:27:44,760
Speaker 1: much that seriously, like I just don't want to Scott teary.

532
00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:48,800
Speaker 1: Its so im to me, don't cry it. I don't

533
00:27:48,880 --> 00:27:50,879
Speaker 1: know what it is. Maybe it's because Ali said she

534
00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:55,880
Speaker 1: cried watching the episode, but it is out multiple times beautiful.

535
00:27:56,359 --> 00:28:00,119
Speaker 1: Now I'm gonna segue since we're talking about tears, I'm

536
00:28:00,119 --> 00:28:04,240
Speaker 1: gonna segue a bit. Ali cried. Dem mean, you're getting emotional.

537
00:28:04,880 --> 00:28:08,400
Speaker 1: I'm getting emotional. Somebody else was emotional on the beach

538
00:28:08,440 --> 00:28:11,440
Speaker 1: as well, and it's we As much as I love

539
00:28:11,520 --> 00:28:13,919
Speaker 1: talking about your relationship with Christian, you also had a

540
00:28:13,960 --> 00:28:17,920
Speaker 1: relationship with somebody else in Paradise before we met Christian,

541
00:28:18,080 --> 00:28:21,399
Speaker 1: and that's Derek. So I want to get into talking

542
00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:26,080
Speaker 1: about Derek and what was your immediate connection to Derek.

543
00:28:26,560 --> 00:28:28,520
Speaker 1: You know, I know you had Christian on your mind.

544
00:28:28,760 --> 00:28:31,199
Speaker 1: I know you came to paradise to be open. But

545
00:28:31,280 --> 00:28:33,840
Speaker 1: there was something about Derek that really got to you.

546
00:28:33,840 --> 00:28:36,919
Speaker 1: And what was that? So Derek and I have a

547
00:28:36,920 --> 00:28:40,600
Speaker 1: similar sense of humor, self deprecating, not really taking ourselves

548
00:28:40,640 --> 00:28:42,920
Speaker 1: too seriously, you know, we can make fun of ourselves.

549
00:28:43,960 --> 00:28:46,960
Speaker 1: And it was just instant and it was natural and

550
00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:50,440
Speaker 1: it was easy, and that's what really attracted me to

551
00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:52,680
Speaker 1: him the most. I could always be myself around him,

552
00:28:52,800 --> 00:28:56,680
Speaker 1: and we could have open and honest conversations, and he

553
00:28:56,800 --> 00:29:01,240
Speaker 1: was always very responsive in the best way. He always

554
00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:03,520
Speaker 1: made me feel good and he made me feel heard

555
00:29:03,800 --> 00:29:09,200
Speaker 1: and understood, and there was no like negative qualities that

556
00:29:09,240 --> 00:29:11,440
Speaker 1: I got from him. I never felt the way that

557
00:29:11,480 --> 00:29:13,280
Speaker 1: most men have made me feel in my life, like

558
00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:16,160
Speaker 1: I was never made to feel stupid by him. He

559
00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:19,239
Speaker 1: was never like gaslighting me, like he was listening to me.

560
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:22,640
Speaker 1: And it was just like any other relationship that I've

561
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:26,520
Speaker 1: ever had with a man or a woman. That really

562
00:29:27,400 --> 00:29:30,640
Speaker 1: just attracted me to him and him being so woke

563
00:29:31,320 --> 00:29:34,440
Speaker 1: whenever I would tell him about my relationship at home

564
00:29:34,480 --> 00:29:37,560
Speaker 1: with a woman, he wasn't upset that it was a woman.

565
00:29:37,640 --> 00:29:40,200
Speaker 1: He was upset that my heart was with someone else.

566
00:29:40,240 --> 00:29:43,360
Speaker 1: It didn't matter to him. The gender of the person

567
00:29:43,880 --> 00:29:47,960
Speaker 1: and him being woke was very attractive to me. I

568
00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:52,440
Speaker 1: thought one thing that was just really amazing and just

569
00:29:52,440 --> 00:29:55,000
Speaker 1: shows why you were attracted to Derek was just how

570
00:29:55,040 --> 00:30:00,040
Speaker 1: he responded when Christian came and their conversation together. I

571
00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:04,840
Speaker 1: think that it just shows the level of respect he

572
00:30:04,920 --> 00:30:09,560
Speaker 1: not only had for you, but for your relationship. How

573
00:30:10,160 --> 00:30:11,680
Speaker 1: did that make you feel and how did that make

574
00:30:11,680 --> 00:30:18,520
Speaker 1: it easier for you? Whenever I told Derek about Christian

575
00:30:18,600 --> 00:30:21,760
Speaker 1: being there, I was terrified of how he was going

576
00:30:21,800 --> 00:30:26,800
Speaker 1: to respond. I knew he'd be upset, but the fact

577
00:30:26,800 --> 00:30:29,959
Speaker 1: that he wanted to go meet her first, I was

578
00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:33,680
Speaker 1: even more scared. At that point. I was like, oh no, oh, no,

579
00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:36,000
Speaker 1: what's he going to say to her? What's going to happen?

580
00:30:36,840 --> 00:30:38,840
Speaker 1: But he proved to be the person that I knew

581
00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:41,400
Speaker 1: that I know that he is because whenever he met her,

582
00:30:41,440 --> 00:30:44,040
Speaker 1: he just wanted to be respectful and in the back

583
00:30:44,080 --> 00:30:46,080
Speaker 1: of his mind he was trying to make me feel

584
00:30:46,080 --> 00:30:48,760
Speaker 1: more comfortable with all of it too. Instead of them

585
00:30:48,800 --> 00:30:51,640
Speaker 1: just kind of awkwardly avoiding each other around the beach,

586
00:30:52,120 --> 00:30:55,600
Speaker 1: he wanted to make sure that he talked to her first,

587
00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:59,880
Speaker 1: and he ultimately did that for me, and that just

588
00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:04,560
Speaker 1: prived like he is an amazing person. So, DEMI, thinking back,

589
00:31:04,720 --> 00:31:07,000
Speaker 1: is there anything that you would have changed about your

590
00:31:07,040 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 1: relationship with Derek? Absolutely not. You know, I known Derek

591
00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:14,960
Speaker 1: for a few days before I had the conversation with

592
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:17,880
Speaker 1: him about someone I was thinking about back home, and

593
00:31:18,040 --> 00:31:20,760
Speaker 1: I think it's fair that I wanted to get to

594
00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:25,280
Speaker 1: know him to the point to know I was ready

595
00:31:25,320 --> 00:31:27,920
Speaker 1: to pursue him. And once I knew I was very

596
00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:29,760
Speaker 1: interested in him, I wanted to be honest with what

597
00:31:29,880 --> 00:31:32,240
Speaker 1: was happening back home. It's not like I was just

598
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:34,680
Speaker 1: going to initially meet this man and be like, oh, yeah,

599
00:31:34,720 --> 00:31:38,320
Speaker 1: by the way, I just had this relationship that was casual, etc. Etc.

600
00:31:39,080 --> 00:31:43,080
Speaker 1: And I didn't know that it was as serious as

601
00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:46,080
Speaker 1: it was until she got there. And once she got there,

602
00:31:46,520 --> 00:31:50,400
Speaker 1: that's whenever everything felt more serious. We were never exclusive,

603
00:31:50,400 --> 00:31:53,400
Speaker 1: we were never committed before Paradise, and I think that

604
00:31:53,480 --> 00:31:56,360
Speaker 1: time apart, as he said earlier, absence makes the heart

605
00:31:56,360 --> 00:31:59,600
Speaker 1: grow fonder. That's when we realized, like, we can't be

606
00:31:59,640 --> 00:32:02,760
Speaker 1: without each other, We need to be in each other's lives,

607
00:32:02,760 --> 00:32:06,360
Speaker 1: and we realize how strong our feelings actually were and

608
00:32:06,840 --> 00:32:10,080
Speaker 1: My feelings for Derek were very strong too, and that's

609
00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:12,400
Speaker 1: why I let him in on that piece of my life,

610
00:32:13,400 --> 00:32:15,600
Speaker 1: because I felt like he deserved to know. But I

611
00:32:15,640 --> 00:32:18,720
Speaker 1: think you know you also on the show, were very

612
00:32:18,800 --> 00:32:23,320
Speaker 1: clear about the fact that you it became more serious

613
00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:26,080
Speaker 1: for you in your mind pretty much as Bachelor in

614
00:32:26,080 --> 00:32:29,720
Speaker 1: Paradise went on, because you realized, like you said on

615
00:32:29,760 --> 00:32:31,720
Speaker 1: the show over and over, that you cared for her

616
00:32:31,800 --> 00:32:33,760
Speaker 1: so much more than you realize when you left for

617
00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:37,280
Speaker 1: Bachelor in Paradise exactly. There are no words that I

618
00:32:37,280 --> 00:32:39,520
Speaker 1: can use to describe the feeling that I felt whenever

619
00:32:39,560 --> 00:32:42,120
Speaker 1: I saw her. I had no idea how strong my

620
00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:45,880
Speaker 1: feelings really were because I had been suppressing so many

621
00:32:45,880 --> 00:32:48,600
Speaker 1: feelings that I had for her, just to keep it

622
00:32:48,640 --> 00:32:51,040
Speaker 1: casual and protect myself, because that's what I always do.

623
00:32:51,560 --> 00:32:54,920
Speaker 1: That's why I've been single for all twenty four years

624
00:32:54,920 --> 00:32:57,040
Speaker 1: of my life. For the most part, I don't know

625
00:32:57,120 --> 00:32:59,640
Speaker 1: what it is like, DEMI to be in your position.

626
00:32:59,680 --> 00:33:03,040
Speaker 1: I don't know what it's like to open up about

627
00:33:03,080 --> 00:33:07,400
Speaker 1: my sexuality and tell people where judgment could come down

628
00:33:07,440 --> 00:33:10,760
Speaker 1: on me for something so personal, so intimate, so to

629
00:33:10,920 --> 00:33:14,840
Speaker 1: my core. That has got to be the most terrifying

630
00:33:14,920 --> 00:33:17,000
Speaker 1: thing in the entire world, and you talked about that

631
00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:21,360
Speaker 1: how opening up your family was very scary. So I

632
00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:24,479
Speaker 1: have chills right now because I truly cannot imagine what

633
00:33:24,560 --> 00:33:27,480
Speaker 1: it would be like having to do that on a

634
00:33:27,600 --> 00:33:31,000
Speaker 1: platform like Bachelor in Paradise to Bachelor Nation, where there

635
00:33:31,000 --> 00:33:35,680
Speaker 1: are not thousands, not hundreds of thousands, millions of people

636
00:33:35,760 --> 00:33:40,640
Speaker 1: there to judge you for your choices. Being with Derek, Yeah,

637
00:33:40,680 --> 00:33:42,880
Speaker 1: that would have been the safe choice, but you didn't.

638
00:33:42,920 --> 00:33:45,160
Speaker 1: You went with your heart and you chose to open up,

639
00:33:45,160 --> 00:33:47,280
Speaker 1: and you chose to let us into your life. And

640
00:33:47,560 --> 00:33:50,800
Speaker 1: I think that's one of the reasons so many people

641
00:33:50,840 --> 00:33:56,160
Speaker 1: out there support you is because that's brave. You are

642
00:33:56,200 --> 00:33:59,640
Speaker 1: a warrior, you are a champion, You are a brave woman.

643
00:33:59,840 --> 00:34:04,520
Speaker 1: And I can't just help but be proud to be

644
00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:07,320
Speaker 1: sitting across from you having this conversation. I adore you,

645
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:09,760
Speaker 1: and you know what I think it is too, Ali.

646
00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:13,800
Speaker 1: I think it's the battle of what you were told

647
00:34:13,840 --> 00:34:19,200
Speaker 1: to do versus what you feel like you're supposed to do.

648
00:34:19,840 --> 00:34:22,359
Speaker 1: And that's why I love the conversation that you were

649
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:24,200
Speaker 1: having with your friends on the beach, when you were

650
00:34:24,200 --> 00:34:27,080
Speaker 1: confiding in them, Demi, and you were telling them, you

651
00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:31,240
Speaker 1: know what you're struggling with, and oh, everybody sees this, Demi,

652
00:34:31,400 --> 00:34:33,640
Speaker 1: but there's so many other sides of me. And that

653
00:34:33,719 --> 00:34:36,600
Speaker 1: was such a relatable moment to me, whether you're talking

654
00:34:36,600 --> 00:34:39,600
Speaker 1: about love, career, or just things you want to do

655
00:34:40,040 --> 00:34:42,600
Speaker 1: in life in general. So many people are told what

656
00:34:42,640 --> 00:34:44,480
Speaker 1: they're supposed to do or feel like they have to

657
00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:49,200
Speaker 1: fit into a certain box, and that was a moment

658
00:34:49,200 --> 00:34:51,439
Speaker 1: where you were stepping outside of that box and saying,

659
00:34:51,520 --> 00:34:54,680
Speaker 1: this is who I am, accept me for who I

660
00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:58,840
Speaker 1: want to be, and that applies to any facet of life.

661
00:34:59,200 --> 00:35:01,239
Speaker 1: And I think that that is what is so great

662
00:35:01,280 --> 00:35:04,040
Speaker 1: about your journey on Bachelor and Paradise is that it

663
00:35:04,120 --> 00:35:09,360
Speaker 1: is applicable to anything. And that's why I'm going to

664
00:35:09,400 --> 00:35:11,680
Speaker 1: piggyback on the words that Ali was saying about being

665
00:35:11,680 --> 00:35:15,200
Speaker 1: a champion and a warrior and being a trail blazer

666
00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:19,800
Speaker 1: because it is so relatable in so many different ways.

667
00:35:21,160 --> 00:35:25,799
Speaker 1: Thank you, guys. Oh my god, I can't, but it is.

668
00:35:25,880 --> 00:35:29,040
Speaker 1: And that's why, and that's what we say. Somebody give

669
00:35:29,040 --> 00:35:31,600
Speaker 1: her a tissue because I'm not fair. I'm not fair,

670
00:35:32,000 --> 00:35:36,200
Speaker 1: but no, but Demmy, I just I guess Oh god,

671
00:35:36,239 --> 00:35:38,520
Speaker 1: I'm gonna cry here they come. I know I am

672
00:35:38,560 --> 00:35:42,719
Speaker 1: too Rachel since a Rachel no, because I just one

673
00:35:42,719 --> 00:35:45,480
Speaker 1: of the moments for me, I didn't realize and Ali

674
00:35:45,520 --> 00:35:47,719
Speaker 1: asked you this question, did you realize what you were

675
00:35:47,760 --> 00:35:51,960
Speaker 1: doing when you decided to do it? And when I

676
00:35:52,200 --> 00:35:55,200
Speaker 1: said yes to being the bachel the first black bachelorette.

677
00:35:55,239 --> 00:35:59,640
Speaker 1: I didn't realize how big of a deal it was

678
00:35:59,719 --> 00:36:03,840
Speaker 1: going to be until someone came to me and said,

679
00:36:04,640 --> 00:36:06,799
Speaker 1: you know, I used to not watch the show. Now

680
00:36:06,840 --> 00:36:08,560
Speaker 1: I can watch it because I see someone who looks

681
00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:12,120
Speaker 1: like me or my daughter watches the show. And that's

682
00:36:12,160 --> 00:36:14,640
Speaker 1: the kind of way people are going to respond to you,

683
00:36:15,280 --> 00:36:18,200
Speaker 1: not even just to be in a same sex relationship,

684
00:36:18,480 --> 00:36:23,480
Speaker 1: but just believing in something, going against the grain and

685
00:36:23,560 --> 00:36:26,080
Speaker 1: saying this is who I am. Accept me for who

686
00:36:26,120 --> 00:36:28,960
Speaker 1: I am, or don't, but I'm going to live my life.

687
00:36:29,080 --> 00:36:31,960
Speaker 1: And that is what is so beautiful about it, And

688
00:36:32,000 --> 00:36:35,200
Speaker 1: that's what makes us so emotional when we talk about it,

689
00:36:35,520 --> 00:36:40,680
Speaker 1: because it's bigger than just having a same sex relationship.

690
00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:45,279
Speaker 1: It's just being not being afraid to be who you are.

691
00:36:46,719 --> 00:36:48,920
Speaker 1: And that's what I want people to see when they

692
00:36:48,960 --> 00:36:52,600
Speaker 1: see your journey through all of this. So I felt

693
00:36:52,680 --> 00:36:57,280
Speaker 1: very safe with Derek, and I would be anyone would

694
00:36:57,280 --> 00:37:00,440
Speaker 1: be so lucky to be with him, but he wasn't

695
00:37:00,440 --> 00:37:04,600
Speaker 1: my person. He made me feel very safe, but my

696
00:37:04,680 --> 00:37:09,280
Speaker 1: heart wasn't in the relationship completely. And once I saw Christian,

697
00:37:09,600 --> 00:37:13,160
Speaker 1: I knew that the way that Derek responded to you

698
00:37:13,840 --> 00:37:16,440
Speaker 1: shows that you were upfront and honest, because he had

699
00:37:16,480 --> 00:37:19,960
Speaker 1: the utmost respect for you. Whether I'm sure he disagreed

700
00:37:20,000 --> 00:37:21,799
Speaker 1: with it because he had feelings for you and he

701
00:37:21,840 --> 00:37:24,080
Speaker 1: was hurt, but at the same time, he respected your

702
00:37:24,120 --> 00:37:27,000
Speaker 1: decision and that's because you were honest with him. And

703
00:37:27,360 --> 00:37:30,840
Speaker 1: so were you surprised to see that Derek wanted to

704
00:37:30,880 --> 00:37:36,799
Speaker 1: talk to Christian and just his entire response to the situation. Oh,

705
00:37:36,960 --> 00:37:41,480
Speaker 1: I was absolutely surprised. I didn't know if he was

706
00:37:41,680 --> 00:37:45,359
Speaker 1: going to be weirded out by everything, you know. I mean,

707
00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:47,880
Speaker 1: he had proved to me in the past few conversations

708
00:37:47,920 --> 00:37:51,759
Speaker 1: that it doesn't matter who you're still thinking about back home,

709
00:37:51,800 --> 00:37:53,360
Speaker 1: it's just the fact that you're thinking about someone in

710
00:37:53,400 --> 00:37:55,640
Speaker 1: a about me. But every time I had a conversation

711
00:37:55,680 --> 00:37:57,960
Speaker 1: with him, he just proved more and more to be

712
00:37:58,320 --> 00:38:02,160
Speaker 1: this amazing guy that I should have been like completely

713
00:38:02,320 --> 00:38:04,799
Speaker 1: stoked to be with but the fact that I kept

714
00:38:04,840 --> 00:38:07,799
Speaker 1: thinking about someone else let me know that this isn't

715
00:38:07,840 --> 00:38:12,839
Speaker 1: my person and the person I'm thinking about is And

716
00:38:12,920 --> 00:38:16,000
Speaker 1: so I just have so much respect for Derek for

717
00:38:16,080 --> 00:38:19,960
Speaker 1: having so much respect for me, and he's going to

718
00:38:20,040 --> 00:38:23,040
Speaker 1: be my friend for the rest of my life. Hands down,

719
00:38:23,280 --> 00:38:25,440
Speaker 1: I need that guy in my life. That if you

720
00:38:25,480 --> 00:38:27,360
Speaker 1: find someone like that, you need them in your corner.

721
00:38:27,440 --> 00:38:31,000
Speaker 1: What has been the fan reaction to you stepping out

722
00:38:31,200 --> 00:38:35,120
Speaker 1: and just showing the world who you are. It's been

723
00:38:35,120 --> 00:38:37,759
Speaker 1: really amazing, Honestly. There's been so many people who have

724
00:38:37,840 --> 00:38:40,480
Speaker 1: reached out to me and they've opened up to me

725
00:38:40,640 --> 00:38:43,719
Speaker 1: about their sexuality and how I've given them a little

726
00:38:43,719 --> 00:38:46,879
Speaker 1: bit of strength. And that makes me tear up every

727
00:38:46,920 --> 00:38:49,080
Speaker 1: time I see them, because the fact that I'm touching

728
00:38:49,120 --> 00:38:51,680
Speaker 1: these lives just by being who I am, it means

729
00:38:51,719 --> 00:38:54,680
Speaker 1: so much to me and it really just touches my heart.

730
00:38:55,320 --> 00:38:58,200
Speaker 1: There are, of course going to be some haters. I

731
00:38:58,200 --> 00:39:01,239
Speaker 1: would say, like one in every hundred thousand people has

732
00:39:01,239 --> 00:39:04,000
Speaker 1: something bad to say about it, So a little bit

733
00:39:04,000 --> 00:39:06,799
Speaker 1: of hate, but it's all outweighed with all of the

734
00:39:06,880 --> 00:39:09,960
Speaker 1: love for this and people feeling more and more comfortable

735
00:39:10,040 --> 00:39:12,960
Speaker 1: to be who they are and to come out in

736
00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:16,920
Speaker 1: their own way. It's honestly very moving. We can't let

737
00:39:16,920 --> 00:39:19,960
Speaker 1: you go, Demi without sort of talking about the rest

738
00:39:20,000 --> 00:39:21,960
Speaker 1: of Paradise, because there's a whole season ahead of us.

739
00:39:21,960 --> 00:39:24,000
Speaker 1: There's a lot more to see, and as we know,

740
00:39:24,560 --> 00:39:29,319
Speaker 1: Christian now is in Paradise with you. How are you

741
00:39:29,360 --> 00:39:31,560
Speaker 1: feeling about everything? Like? What can we expect? How are

742
00:39:31,560 --> 00:39:38,760
Speaker 1: you feeling about everyone seeing your relationship unfold? You know, okay,

743
00:39:38,880 --> 00:39:42,840
Speaker 1: what to expect. Let's just say it's not going to

744
00:39:42,920 --> 00:39:45,359
Speaker 1: be perfect. It's not like she gets to Paradise and

745
00:39:45,440 --> 00:39:47,480
Speaker 1: now all of a sudden we're in a perfect, happy

746
00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:51,439
Speaker 1: relationship and we're running off into the sunset together. They're

747
00:39:51,480 --> 00:39:53,439
Speaker 1: still going to be problems. They're still gonna be real

748
00:39:53,520 --> 00:39:58,799
Speaker 1: people issues and relationship problems, and you'll get to see

749
00:39:58,920 --> 00:40:01,960
Speaker 1: us go through some things to together. As far as

750
00:40:01,960 --> 00:40:05,959
Speaker 1: I'm feeling, I feel very relieved that now she's here

751
00:40:06,400 --> 00:40:10,000
Speaker 1: and I don't have to worry about seeing our interaction

752
00:40:10,040 --> 00:40:13,080
Speaker 1: together because it is. It makes me feel good seeing it.

753
00:40:13,080 --> 00:40:15,880
Speaker 1: It makes me tear up reliving all of those emotions.

754
00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:18,400
Speaker 1: So I'm excited for everyone to get to see what

755
00:40:18,440 --> 00:40:22,120
Speaker 1: we go through together. I'm excited to get to watch

756
00:40:22,200 --> 00:40:26,399
Speaker 1: back this crazy journey that we went through together. It

757
00:40:26,440 --> 00:40:28,799
Speaker 1: was a really fun summer, but it was not all fun.

758
00:40:29,239 --> 00:40:31,960
Speaker 1: It was very emotional and it was very real, and

759
00:40:32,040 --> 00:40:35,280
Speaker 1: like I said, we wouldn't have had these moments without

760
00:40:35,320 --> 00:40:38,799
Speaker 1: Paradise in the real world. We would still be on

761
00:40:38,840 --> 00:40:40,920
Speaker 1: the surface level. Or you were ready for it. You

762
00:40:41,000 --> 00:40:42,719
Speaker 1: kind of had to decide in that moment whether you

763
00:40:42,719 --> 00:40:45,200
Speaker 1: were ready for it or not, if you were comfortable

764
00:40:45,840 --> 00:40:48,279
Speaker 1: putting all of yourself out there. It's one thing to

765
00:40:48,320 --> 00:40:50,920
Speaker 1: talk about it, like you said, but to show it

766
00:40:52,160 --> 00:40:55,640
Speaker 1: were you terrified? Very much? So I was very anxious

767
00:40:55,680 --> 00:40:59,560
Speaker 1: about it too, and that's where you know, you'll see

768
00:40:59,600 --> 00:41:03,160
Speaker 1: my anxiety play into this this season. My anxiety was

769
00:41:03,320 --> 00:41:06,080
Speaker 1: very high level, just because of the fact that people

770
00:41:06,120 --> 00:41:08,280
Speaker 1: were going to see me making out with a girl

771
00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:14,000
Speaker 1: on camera, and that's just terrifying. And you even think

772
00:41:14,040 --> 00:41:16,239
Speaker 1: about the cameramen that are seeing it, and you think

773
00:41:16,280 --> 00:41:19,160
Speaker 1: about the audio. Guys. Like I said, it's not just

774
00:41:20,400 --> 00:41:23,680
Speaker 1: as simple as oh, you're in the moment with this person, Like, yes,

775
00:41:23,719 --> 00:41:25,560
Speaker 1: I'm in the moment with this person. And sometimes I

776
00:41:25,560 --> 00:41:29,200
Speaker 1: could stay there, but my mind was constantly wandering around

777
00:41:29,200 --> 00:41:32,040
Speaker 1: and thinking about all the different people seeing it, and

778
00:41:32,600 --> 00:41:36,680
Speaker 1: I let it affect me too much. But at the

779
00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:39,319
Speaker 1: end of it all, like I will say that I

780
00:41:39,480 --> 00:41:45,919
Speaker 1: overcame it, so that's good, that's great. Was Christian part

781
00:41:45,960 --> 00:41:47,759
Speaker 1: of helping you overcome that? Or did you guys help

782
00:41:47,760 --> 00:41:54,279
Speaker 1: each other through that? Definitely? She's very very supportive of me,

783
00:41:54,320 --> 00:41:56,839
Speaker 1: and she helped me through it a lot. I could

784
00:41:56,880 --> 00:41:59,000
Speaker 1: have helped her more, I would say, but she was

785
00:41:59,040 --> 00:42:01,959
Speaker 1: always there for me. One question I just want to ask,

786
00:42:02,040 --> 00:42:05,200
Speaker 1: because I think this is just a general question that

787
00:42:05,440 --> 00:42:09,120
Speaker 1: Bacheur Nation wants to know, but why did you choose

788
00:42:09,160 --> 00:42:13,360
Speaker 1: to share your story on the Bachelor Nation platform? Because

789
00:42:13,360 --> 00:42:15,839
Speaker 1: there's so many ways you could have done it. I

790
00:42:15,880 --> 00:42:19,880
Speaker 1: think that well, I always knew I was going to

791
00:42:19,920 --> 00:42:22,520
Speaker 1: go to Paradise. That was already in the cards for me,

792
00:42:23,440 --> 00:42:28,040
Speaker 1: and I had been struggling with the conversations of coming

793
00:42:28,040 --> 00:42:32,000
Speaker 1: out to everyone, and you know, do I like tweet

794
00:42:32,080 --> 00:42:34,560
Speaker 1: it or should I instagram it? Or am I going

795
00:42:34,640 --> 00:42:37,520
Speaker 1: to have a million different conversations about it. I wanted

796
00:42:37,560 --> 00:42:40,919
Speaker 1: to just have one big moment of clearing the air,

797
00:42:41,920 --> 00:42:44,160
Speaker 1: and so that's why I did it on Paradise because

798
00:42:44,200 --> 00:42:47,399
Speaker 1: I knew then I could avoid having so many conversations

799
00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:50,000
Speaker 1: and just be straight up about it right then and there.

800
00:42:50,680 --> 00:42:54,680
Speaker 1: And I mean I felt comfortable to do it at

801
00:42:54,680 --> 00:42:58,960
Speaker 1: that point. Demi, go big or go home. That's the

802
00:42:59,000 --> 00:43:00,719
Speaker 1: only way to do it. That's what you do. That's

803
00:43:00,760 --> 00:43:03,000
Speaker 1: literally your motto, and that's what we've seen to you.

804
00:43:03,080 --> 00:43:05,279
Speaker 1: I feel like you are going to spark so many

805
00:43:05,320 --> 00:43:10,080
Speaker 1: conversations all over the country between moms and sons and

806
00:43:10,239 --> 00:43:13,560
Speaker 1: dads and daughters and friends and just people who have

807
00:43:13,640 --> 00:43:16,160
Speaker 1: been scared to come out about who they are. You

808
00:43:16,200 --> 00:43:18,040
Speaker 1: are going to give I'm gonna cry, You're going to

809
00:43:18,120 --> 00:43:20,880
Speaker 1: give them the strength to do that. I'm so proud

810
00:43:20,880 --> 00:43:24,000
Speaker 1: of you. I'm we are honored that you came here

811
00:43:24,040 --> 00:43:26,319
Speaker 1: on our podcast to talk to us. Thank you so much.

812
00:43:26,840 --> 00:43:29,719
Speaker 1: Bring Christian on at some point, Yes, I would love

813
00:43:29,760 --> 00:43:32,160
Speaker 1: to talk to her. We can't wait to see you, guys,

814
00:43:32,320 --> 00:43:35,000
Speaker 1: everything unfold this season. You're an incredible human being. Thank

815
00:43:35,040 --> 00:43:37,680
Speaker 1: you for being here. Thank you guys, Thank you so much.

816
00:43:37,840 --> 00:43:40,399
Speaker 1: We're gonna let Demi go, but after this we're gonna

817
00:43:40,440 --> 00:43:43,279
Speaker 1: be talking to Nicole from Bachelor Paradise as well. She's

818
00:43:43,280 --> 00:43:45,720
Speaker 1: got a lot to talk about with that fight between

819
00:43:45,800 --> 00:43:50,000
Speaker 1: Christian and Jordan. Welcome back. We have Nicole joining us

820
00:43:50,040 --> 00:43:52,160
Speaker 1: on the phone. Nicole, thanks so much for calling in.

821
00:43:52,360 --> 00:43:55,320
Speaker 1: Oh my god, of course, I'm so excited to be here. Nicol.

822
00:43:55,360 --> 00:43:58,560
Speaker 1: You've been a hot commodity on this season of Paradise.

823
00:43:58,760 --> 00:44:01,239
Speaker 1: I mean, I mean you mentioned it yourself. You said,

824
00:44:01,239 --> 00:44:03,160
Speaker 1: I went from no. One on one dates to here,

825
00:44:03,200 --> 00:44:05,359
Speaker 1: I am going on three one on one dates? Like,

826
00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:08,920
Speaker 1: what was that like for you? I was so surprised

827
00:44:08,960 --> 00:44:10,680
Speaker 1: you could even see it on my face. I was

828
00:44:10,719 --> 00:44:13,040
Speaker 1: just like, I thought, you know, okay on Yeka is

829
00:44:13,040 --> 00:44:15,680
Speaker 1: gonna be here, there's gonna be drama. I'm probably not

830
00:44:15,719 --> 00:44:17,440
Speaker 1: even gonna get like a guy to look at me.

831
00:44:17,760 --> 00:44:20,160
Speaker 1: And then all of a sudden, it's like, bam, bam bam,

832
00:44:20,360 --> 00:44:22,359
Speaker 1: I'm going on one date. Then on the next day,

833
00:44:22,400 --> 00:44:25,680
Speaker 1: and with Jordan. It was just incredible. Oh my gosh.

834
00:44:25,719 --> 00:44:29,600
Speaker 1: I completely forgot that you had an issue with a Yeka. Yes,

835
00:44:29,760 --> 00:44:32,320
Speaker 1: how did that happen? I mean, were y'all okay in Paradise?

836
00:44:32,360 --> 00:44:34,480
Speaker 1: Did y'all talk it out or were y'all good before

837
00:44:34,520 --> 00:44:37,359
Speaker 1: walking in? No? I mean we were just good, like

838
00:44:37,800 --> 00:44:40,799
Speaker 1: you know, it was really rocky on Colton season of

839
00:44:40,800 --> 00:44:43,759
Speaker 1: the Bachelor, but then once we got our feet in

840
00:44:43,760 --> 00:44:47,879
Speaker 1: the sand, that was it. No drama, water and Colton. Yeah,

841
00:44:48,280 --> 00:44:50,440
Speaker 1: take the guy out of the equation. It's all good. No,

842
00:44:50,880 --> 00:44:52,640
Speaker 1: I mean it had to feel pretty good. I would

843
00:44:52,680 --> 00:44:54,880
Speaker 1: have been like, heck, yes, all these guys, because it

844
00:44:54,920 --> 00:44:58,040
Speaker 1: has to be nerve wracking going into Paradise, wondering if

845
00:44:58,160 --> 00:44:59,759
Speaker 1: you're going to hit it off with anybody, and then

846
00:44:59,800 --> 00:45:02,360
Speaker 1: if you have to sort of like do the I mean, Rachel,

847
00:45:02,400 --> 00:45:04,120
Speaker 1: you and I have talked about this, the pity kiss.

848
00:45:04,520 --> 00:45:06,120
Speaker 1: You know, we are like making out with somebody at

849
00:45:06,120 --> 00:45:08,480
Speaker 1: the rose ceremony or the cocktail party just so you

850
00:45:08,480 --> 00:45:10,840
Speaker 1: can get the rows. You didn't have that problem, no

851
00:45:11,000 --> 00:45:12,640
Speaker 1: at all. But I mean I thought I was going

852
00:45:12,680 --> 00:45:14,680
Speaker 1: to have that problem. All the producers people were coming

853
00:45:14,719 --> 00:45:16,279
Speaker 1: up to me like Nicole, you have to make a move,

854
00:45:16,320 --> 00:45:17,759
Speaker 1: you have to make a move, and I was like,

855
00:45:17,800 --> 00:45:19,440
Speaker 1: I can't. I'm not good at this. I'm used to

856
00:45:19,440 --> 00:45:21,319
Speaker 1: guys like hitting on me at the bar. I'm not

857
00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:23,640
Speaker 1: used to like being the one who has to pursue guys.

858
00:45:24,080 --> 00:45:26,080
Speaker 1: And then it just happened naturally, like Clay went up

859
00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:27,360
Speaker 1: to me. I was like, all right, I'll go on

860
00:45:27,480 --> 00:45:29,080
Speaker 1: date with you, and then Jordan went up to me.

861
00:45:29,440 --> 00:45:32,320
Speaker 1: It just started happening like a ripple effect in Christians

862
00:45:32,680 --> 00:45:34,839
Speaker 1: Year road in on you. I mean, he didn't even

863
00:45:34,880 --> 00:45:38,080
Speaker 1: talk to another girl. That's true, Yeah it was. It

864
00:45:38,160 --> 00:45:40,520
Speaker 1: was a pretty hilarious sense. I think I heard you

865
00:45:40,560 --> 00:45:42,319
Speaker 1: say that you didn't know who he was, which was

866
00:45:42,400 --> 00:45:46,120
Speaker 1: my same thought. I said, who's this man? But and

867
00:45:46,560 --> 00:45:48,600
Speaker 1: is that true? Did you not know who he is? No?

868
00:45:48,680 --> 00:45:51,240
Speaker 1: I had no idea. He looked like some soap opera,

869
00:45:51,360 --> 00:45:54,880
Speaker 1: some actor. I was like, who is this person? Character?

870
00:45:55,040 --> 00:45:57,239
Speaker 1: I can die, I can guarantee which role he would

871
00:45:57,280 --> 00:46:01,640
Speaker 1: have played in a soap opera, soap opera. Coming into Paradise,

872
00:46:01,680 --> 00:46:03,920
Speaker 1: did you have your eye on anyone in particular? We

873
00:46:03,960 --> 00:46:06,160
Speaker 1: know everyone had their eye on you, but what were

874
00:46:06,200 --> 00:46:09,080
Speaker 1: you thinking coming in? No? I just had no idea

875
00:46:09,120 --> 00:46:10,480
Speaker 1: who was going to be there. You know, I'm one

876
00:46:10,480 --> 00:46:13,439
Speaker 1: of those girls who, unlike some people you know, I had.

877
00:46:13,920 --> 00:46:17,160
Speaker 1: I didn't start into ady DMS. I wasn't at stagecoach,

878
00:46:17,640 --> 00:46:19,400
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Like I just I just

879
00:46:19,400 --> 00:46:21,360
Speaker 1: showed up to the beach not knowing who's going to

880
00:46:21,440 --> 00:46:24,160
Speaker 1: be there, So I had no idea. Even that first day,

881
00:46:24,200 --> 00:46:26,319
Speaker 1: you could see I wasn't even involved in that much

882
00:46:26,400 --> 00:46:29,000
Speaker 1: talk or drama because I had no idea who I

883
00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:31,440
Speaker 1: was going to be interested in. No clue. Then some

884
00:46:31,560 --> 00:46:37,040
Speaker 1: drama sort of came around. What did you think standing there?

885
00:46:37,080 --> 00:46:40,040
Speaker 1: Because you know, obviously we saw this fight breakout, which

886
00:46:40,280 --> 00:46:45,320
Speaker 1: is was very unfortunate. What did it feel like being

887
00:46:45,719 --> 00:46:50,200
Speaker 1: sort of the person that these guys were fighting over. Oh,

888
00:46:50,280 --> 00:46:53,160
Speaker 1: I still can't believe it. I mean, obviously it's unfortunate

889
00:46:53,200 --> 00:46:55,560
Speaker 1: that they had to get physical, because that was scary.

890
00:46:55,680 --> 00:46:57,880
Speaker 1: But I knew Jordan was going to be up to

891
00:46:57,960 --> 00:47:00,520
Speaker 1: no good, especially with Christian, and I know they had

892
00:47:00,560 --> 00:47:03,520
Speaker 1: like some beef at the Mental Law like a year ago.

893
00:47:03,640 --> 00:47:07,120
Speaker 1: So it was just crazy being in being the center

894
00:47:07,160 --> 00:47:09,239
Speaker 1: of it. And I'm just sitting there like is this real?

895
00:47:09,760 --> 00:47:11,440
Speaker 1: Like at first I thought the fight was fake. I

896
00:47:11,480 --> 00:47:13,560
Speaker 1: thought it was like a stage fight, so I was

897
00:47:13,560 --> 00:47:15,359
Speaker 1: like ha ha ha, And then I see producers like

898
00:47:15,440 --> 00:47:19,080
Speaker 1: running up to Christian and Jordan, and I was like, wait,

899
00:47:19,120 --> 00:47:22,680
Speaker 1: this is real, this is actually happening. Yeah. No, it

900
00:47:23,400 --> 00:47:26,040
Speaker 1: was intense to see the build up of it. I

901
00:47:26,560 --> 00:47:28,640
Speaker 1: guess I want to ask you when it comes to Clay,

902
00:47:28,719 --> 00:47:30,480
Speaker 1: because I know at one point you and Clay walk

903
00:47:30,520 --> 00:47:32,719
Speaker 1: on the beach and you kind of tell him, you know,

904
00:47:33,480 --> 00:47:36,759
Speaker 1: Christian was standing over you. He was towering over you,

905
00:47:37,080 --> 00:47:39,160
Speaker 1: and you didn't do anything you need to, you know,

906
00:47:39,280 --> 00:47:42,000
Speaker 1: stand up and fight. And then the next thing we

907
00:47:42,040 --> 00:47:46,880
Speaker 1: see is an actual physical altercation happened. Are you okay

908
00:47:46,920 --> 00:47:49,160
Speaker 1: with the way Clay handled it? And do you understand

909
00:47:49,160 --> 00:47:52,640
Speaker 1: why he took that route? Oh my gosh. Yeah, the

910
00:47:52,760 --> 00:47:56,160
Speaker 1: fight made me appreciate Clay so much. It made me realize,

911
00:47:56,160 --> 00:47:59,000
Speaker 1: like the kind of man I'm looking for, someone who

912
00:47:59,080 --> 00:48:02,720
Speaker 1: isn't hot temper, who's just going to react on something,

913
00:48:02,760 --> 00:48:05,640
Speaker 1: you know, physically or get violent. It made me realize, Wow,

914
00:48:06,120 --> 00:48:09,399
Speaker 1: I was so wrong, Like Clay actually has these characteristics

915
00:48:09,400 --> 00:48:12,200
Speaker 1: that I'm looking for. You know, he's like, you know,

916
00:48:12,239 --> 00:48:16,480
Speaker 1: he's tame, like he's but sure a gentleman. He processes

917
00:48:16,520 --> 00:48:18,960
Speaker 1: his feelings. He's not just gonna like react because someone

918
00:48:19,360 --> 00:48:23,439
Speaker 1: punched a pinata voice by men, do what play did? Yep?

919
00:48:24,400 --> 00:48:28,160
Speaker 1: Couldn't have said it better? Yes, So you know the

920
00:48:28,200 --> 00:48:31,759
Speaker 1: guys got sent home, you know they you know it's

921
00:48:31,800 --> 00:48:34,319
Speaker 1: hands off and you know, knowing the show, they are

922
00:48:34,400 --> 00:48:38,040
Speaker 1: very serious about the contestants safety, and Jordan and Christian

923
00:48:38,120 --> 00:48:42,120
Speaker 1: crossed that line, so they had to go. But putting

924
00:48:42,160 --> 00:48:44,640
Speaker 1: that aside, how did that feel for you? Because we

925
00:48:44,680 --> 00:48:47,560
Speaker 1: obviasically see you move forward with Clay, and I'm so

926
00:48:47,640 --> 00:48:51,319
Speaker 1: glad you did because I love him so much. But

927
00:48:51,880 --> 00:48:53,960
Speaker 1: how did that feel? Because you had a really intense

928
00:48:54,000 --> 00:48:58,080
Speaker 1: connection with Christian? So were you sad in that moment?

929
00:48:58,239 --> 00:48:59,840
Speaker 1: I mean, put yourself back in that moment. I know

930
00:48:59,840 --> 00:49:01,480
Speaker 1: you move forward with Clay, but in that moment you

931
00:49:01,520 --> 00:49:04,680
Speaker 1: had to be a little bit angry. Yeah, I kind

932
00:49:04,680 --> 00:49:06,960
Speaker 1: of wish I would have gotten that closure from both

933
00:49:06,960 --> 00:49:08,640
Speaker 1: of them, Like I wish I would have been able

934
00:49:08,680 --> 00:49:11,480
Speaker 1: to hand out roses and give them a reason why

935
00:49:11,480 --> 00:49:13,480
Speaker 1: I didn't choose them, or like, I don't know, I

936
00:49:13,520 --> 00:49:16,200
Speaker 1: just like I had so much more to say to

937
00:49:16,280 --> 00:49:19,360
Speaker 1: Christian and to Jordan, and I never got that closure

938
00:49:19,400 --> 00:49:21,520
Speaker 1: from either of them. So I felt like that was

939
00:49:21,520 --> 00:49:24,839
Speaker 1: just taken away from me. But at the same time,

940
00:49:24,840 --> 00:49:27,560
Speaker 1: it just made my decision so much easier and I

941
00:49:27,640 --> 00:49:30,839
Speaker 1: was like thankful for it, you know, it was just

942
00:49:31,480 --> 00:49:33,600
Speaker 1: meant to be. When you say that you had more

943
00:49:33,640 --> 00:49:36,200
Speaker 1: that you wanted to say, Are you saying like you

944
00:49:36,239 --> 00:49:38,279
Speaker 1: wanted to get to know them better or you just

945
00:49:38,360 --> 00:49:41,799
Speaker 1: needed to get something off your chest. I guess I

946
00:49:41,840 --> 00:49:44,720
Speaker 1: just wanted to get to know them better. But honestly,

947
00:49:44,840 --> 00:49:48,279
Speaker 1: that example like showed me everything. It turned out, like

948
00:49:48,320 --> 00:49:51,200
Speaker 1: the way they reacted to that fight is exactly what

949
00:49:51,239 --> 00:49:54,680
Speaker 1: I need to see. And speaking of showing people things, now,

950
00:49:55,040 --> 00:49:58,560
Speaker 1: when I was watching and I saw Christian roll up

951
00:49:58,600 --> 00:50:01,120
Speaker 1: to the time that you were having with Clay, I

952
00:50:01,160 --> 00:50:04,680
Speaker 1: mean the red flags were just waving in the wind

953
00:50:05,160 --> 00:50:08,400
Speaker 1: the way he approached that situation and tried to basically,

954
00:50:09,280 --> 00:50:12,480
Speaker 1: you know, monopolize your time when he had just had

955
00:50:12,520 --> 00:50:14,920
Speaker 1: you all day. Was that a red flag for you?

956
00:50:14,920 --> 00:50:16,880
Speaker 1: Were you starting to kind of see the riding on

957
00:50:16,880 --> 00:50:18,799
Speaker 1: the wall with him or did you just brush that

958
00:50:18,920 --> 00:50:21,440
Speaker 1: situation off because I felt like that was the slippery

959
00:50:21,719 --> 00:50:25,520
Speaker 1: slope or a slippery slope. That's so true, because I

960
00:50:25,560 --> 00:50:27,839
Speaker 1: was a little bit worried, you know, I like the cockiness,

961
00:50:27,920 --> 00:50:29,600
Speaker 1: but I was worried he'd be like a little bit

962
00:50:29,640 --> 00:50:34,360
Speaker 1: of a macho like that. There's like that Christian yeah machismo.

963
00:50:34,600 --> 00:50:36,080
Speaker 1: So I was a little bit worried about that. And

964
00:50:36,120 --> 00:50:38,359
Speaker 1: then the moment he went up to me and Clay.

965
00:50:38,440 --> 00:50:40,000
Speaker 1: I just saw it. I saw, like, you know, he

966
00:50:40,080 --> 00:50:42,279
Speaker 1: was like puffing up his chest, just like trying to

967
00:50:42,320 --> 00:50:45,759
Speaker 1: prove a point that he can, you know, have his

968
00:50:45,840 --> 00:50:47,839
Speaker 1: way with me basically, or like tell me what to do.

969
00:50:48,040 --> 00:50:50,759
Speaker 1: But you know, this is paradise that the rule of

970
00:50:50,760 --> 00:50:53,720
Speaker 1: the game is that we get to date multiple people.

971
00:50:54,360 --> 00:50:58,680
Speaker 1: And I have a say so, yeah, definitely, it was

972
00:50:58,719 --> 00:51:00,360
Speaker 1: like the biggest red flag. And I should have just

973
00:51:00,440 --> 00:51:03,400
Speaker 1: been like no, yeah, because there's like a it's a

974
00:51:03,640 --> 00:51:06,920
Speaker 1: line between like showing that you really care about someone

975
00:51:06,920 --> 00:51:09,880
Speaker 1: and being forward and fighting for them, obviously not in

976
00:51:09,920 --> 00:51:13,400
Speaker 1: the physical sense, but and then acting the way he acted.

977
00:51:13,440 --> 00:51:15,719
Speaker 1: There's a big difference between those two things and he

978
00:51:15,840 --> 00:51:17,719
Speaker 1: I guess I shouldn't say it's a fine line with him.

979
00:51:17,760 --> 00:51:20,359
Speaker 1: It's a huge difference. And he just obviously didn't handle

980
00:51:20,360 --> 00:51:24,080
Speaker 1: that correctly. But tell us about Clay, I just adore

981
00:51:24,200 --> 00:51:27,400
Speaker 1: him such a fan. I'm such a fan. I just

982
00:51:27,440 --> 00:51:29,719
Speaker 1: feel like he is just such a good human being,

983
00:51:29,719 --> 00:51:32,600
Speaker 1: a teddy bear. I love the way he respects you,

984
00:51:33,080 --> 00:51:37,120
Speaker 1: Like he didn't care about himself when Christian was coming

985
00:51:37,120 --> 00:51:39,359
Speaker 1: at him. It wasn't about him, it was about you.

986
00:51:39,840 --> 00:51:42,120
Speaker 1: And that's actually about Tyler on Hannah season. What I

987
00:51:42,120 --> 00:51:44,040
Speaker 1: loved about Tyler he always made it about Hannah and

988
00:51:44,080 --> 00:51:46,160
Speaker 1: thinking about her, and I feel like that's what Clay

989
00:51:46,200 --> 00:51:48,839
Speaker 1: does with you, So tell us all about him. Oh

990
00:51:48,920 --> 00:51:52,680
Speaker 1: my gosh, I know. It's just crazy, like it just happened,

991
00:51:52,719 --> 00:51:55,440
Speaker 1: Like the chemistry happened immediately after that first one on

992
00:51:55,440 --> 00:51:57,400
Speaker 1: one day, and I had no idea what was going

993
00:51:57,440 --> 00:51:59,399
Speaker 1: to be coming, because we were both like the first

994
00:51:59,480 --> 00:52:01,440
Speaker 1: day I met him, we were both like, what are

995
00:52:01,440 --> 00:52:03,560
Speaker 1: we gonna do? I'm not I even told him I

996
00:52:03,600 --> 00:52:05,320
Speaker 1: don't know who if I like anyone here. I was

997
00:52:05,400 --> 00:52:07,279
Speaker 1: venting to him like a friend, like I had no

998
00:52:07,320 --> 00:52:11,319
Speaker 1: idea some like amazing chemistry was bound to happen at all.

999
00:52:11,920 --> 00:52:14,759
Speaker 1: And then when we finally just started talking, and oh

1000
00:52:14,840 --> 00:52:16,640
Speaker 1: my gosh, it was just I felt like I was

1001
00:52:16,640 --> 00:52:18,799
Speaker 1: talking to a best friend the entire time. And that's

1002
00:52:18,800 --> 00:52:21,160
Speaker 1: when I know it's real. That's when I start getting

1003
00:52:21,200 --> 00:52:23,160
Speaker 1: like that feeling, you know, because it wasn't just like,

1004
00:52:23,160 --> 00:52:26,520
Speaker 1: oh I find up attractive, because obviously he is. I

1005
00:52:26,560 --> 00:52:28,880
Speaker 1: mean he's like this, you know, this male specimen on

1006
00:52:28,920 --> 00:52:30,839
Speaker 1: the beach and everyone's like, Nicole, is that your man?

1007
00:52:30,920 --> 00:52:33,759
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, yeah, the ladies. It was like the

1008
00:52:33,880 --> 00:52:37,120
Speaker 1: morning routine. Let's see what workout Clay's doing today. It

1009
00:52:37,200 --> 00:52:39,560
Speaker 1: literally was a routine. I have a question for you

1010
00:52:40,440 --> 00:52:45,200
Speaker 1: what was inside the pinata? But I'll never know. I

1011
00:52:45,200 --> 00:52:49,000
Speaker 1: had no idea. I didn't know that. I hope it

1012
00:52:49,040 --> 00:52:52,080
Speaker 1: was like diamonds or something like something amazing to like

1013
00:52:52,239 --> 00:52:54,840
Speaker 1: fight over and leave over. It was probably pictures of

1014
00:52:54,920 --> 00:53:00,880
Speaker 1: Christian himself, probably his little modeling shot. You right there

1015
00:53:01,440 --> 00:53:03,840
Speaker 1: in the middle of the fight when it happened, or

1016
00:53:04,160 --> 00:53:06,960
Speaker 1: as it was starting. In your opinion, who was at fault,

1017
00:53:07,120 --> 00:53:10,160
Speaker 1: Jordan or Christian. Well, you know, it's crazy, it's such

1018
00:53:10,200 --> 00:53:12,560
Speaker 1: a blur, like I have no idea. I feel like,

1019
00:53:12,560 --> 00:53:15,719
Speaker 1: obviously Jordan is the one who's like stampeding towards us,

1020
00:53:15,760 --> 00:53:17,640
Speaker 1: so I was like, oh, no, here we go. But

1021
00:53:17,840 --> 00:53:20,480
Speaker 1: at that moment, it's such a blur. All I saw

1022
00:53:20,680 --> 00:53:23,600
Speaker 1: is like bodies on the ground, like flying like literally

1023
00:53:23,719 --> 00:53:26,640
Speaker 1: arms wailing, and then it was just like producers and

1024
00:53:26,800 --> 00:53:29,799
Speaker 1: security all up in my face, and I was just

1025
00:53:29,840 --> 00:53:33,719
Speaker 1: stunned sitting there, and I'm so mad at Jordan. I mean,

1026
00:53:33,719 --> 00:53:36,399
Speaker 1: I'm mad at both of them, and Jordan was just

1027
00:53:36,800 --> 00:53:39,279
Speaker 1: the comedic relief of the show that I needed with

1028
00:53:39,320 --> 00:53:41,160
Speaker 1: all this drama. I mean, I love the love story,

1029
00:53:41,160 --> 00:53:43,040
Speaker 1: I love you and play together, I love all that,

1030
00:53:43,080 --> 00:53:45,799
Speaker 1: but like he makes me laugh out loud, Like I

1031
00:53:45,800 --> 00:53:48,040
Speaker 1: find myself spitting out my wine while I'm watching the

1032
00:53:48,080 --> 00:53:49,520
Speaker 1: show with the things that come out of his mouth.

1033
00:53:49,520 --> 00:53:51,839
Speaker 1: So I'm just disappointed at him that that happened. I

1034
00:53:51,840 --> 00:53:53,799
Speaker 1: really wanted him to stick around, but you weren't really

1035
00:53:53,800 --> 00:53:56,759
Speaker 1: into him, Let's face it, right, or like, all right,

1036
00:53:56,960 --> 00:53:58,880
Speaker 1: even after the end of our day, he was like,

1037
00:53:58,920 --> 00:54:01,920
Speaker 1: all right, Nicole, piece was great seeing okay. You know,

1038
00:54:02,800 --> 00:54:04,560
Speaker 1: he was just like pat on the back. I'm like, oh,

1039
00:54:04,600 --> 00:54:08,600
Speaker 1: all right, buddies, you know how he is. Yeah, since

1040
00:54:08,680 --> 00:54:11,359
Speaker 1: that was his approach, do you feel like, like, looking back,

1041
00:54:11,400 --> 00:54:13,000
Speaker 1: I know it was all a blur to you. You

1042
00:54:13,040 --> 00:54:16,640
Speaker 1: don't really remember the details per se, But knowing that

1043
00:54:16,640 --> 00:54:19,239
Speaker 1: that's how he responded after your date, him knowing that

1044
00:54:19,280 --> 00:54:21,880
Speaker 1: you were really into Clay and you had this, you know,

1045
00:54:21,920 --> 00:54:25,160
Speaker 1: attraction to Christian as well, do you think that maybe

1046
00:54:25,400 --> 00:54:27,560
Speaker 1: in regards to the fight, he was thinking, I don't

1047
00:54:27,560 --> 00:54:30,640
Speaker 1: have anything anything else to lose. I have a point

1048
00:54:30,680 --> 00:54:33,239
Speaker 1: to prove. I don't like the way that Christian's handling this,

1049
00:54:33,280 --> 00:54:35,840
Speaker 1: so I'm just gonna go for it. Yeah, it's probably

1050
00:54:35,880 --> 00:54:38,480
Speaker 1: exactly what went through his mind. Actually, I think he

1051
00:54:38,600 --> 00:54:41,439
Speaker 1: nailed it. He knew he had nothing to lose, Like

1052
00:54:41,640 --> 00:54:44,000
Speaker 1: I wasn't really a part of Like, he wasn't really

1053
00:54:44,000 --> 00:54:46,000
Speaker 1: thinking about me at that moment. It was just about

1054
00:54:46,000 --> 00:54:48,960
Speaker 1: proving a point, you know. Last year, I mean heum

1055
00:54:49,120 --> 00:54:51,040
Speaker 1: like the huge Teddy Bear in the ocean. This year

1056
00:54:51,080 --> 00:54:53,120
Speaker 1: it was going to be the Pinata. I feel like

1057
00:54:53,160 --> 00:54:55,439
Speaker 1: it was going to be a similar theme like that,

1058
00:54:55,560 --> 00:54:58,879
Speaker 1: and then it just escalated because Christian, you know, he's

1059
00:54:58,880 --> 00:55:04,200
Speaker 1: like a fiery Latin man who just reacted out of

1060
00:55:04,200 --> 00:55:06,160
Speaker 1: the blue. And I think what some people are going

1061
00:55:06,200 --> 00:55:07,920
Speaker 1: to be thinking too. And I want to give you

1062
00:55:07,960 --> 00:55:10,640
Speaker 1: the opportunity to address this because I don't want people

1063
00:55:10,640 --> 00:55:13,080
Speaker 1: to feel this way. Is that you know, there's a

1064
00:55:13,120 --> 00:55:14,480
Speaker 1: lot of talk on the show, and I don't feel

1065
00:55:14,520 --> 00:55:15,680
Speaker 1: this way, but there's a lot of talk on the

1066
00:55:15,719 --> 00:55:18,279
Speaker 1: show and past seasons about pity Roses. Right, they got

1067
00:55:18,280 --> 00:55:21,000
Speaker 1: a pity Rose. What do you want people to know

1068
00:55:21,080 --> 00:55:24,880
Speaker 1: about your decision to move forward with Clay because I

1069
00:55:24,960 --> 00:55:27,239
Speaker 1: want to I want to know as a Clay like

1070
00:55:27,360 --> 00:55:29,439
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm Clay as Mama bear or something.

1071
00:55:29,520 --> 00:55:31,319
Speaker 1: I want to protect him. I want to know like

1072
00:55:31,600 --> 00:55:35,480
Speaker 1: that you would have chosen him regardless, Oh my gosh. Yes.

1073
00:55:36,080 --> 00:55:38,919
Speaker 1: And I mean I kind of like wanted to test

1074
00:55:38,960 --> 00:55:40,960
Speaker 1: the waters a little bit to see how Clay would react.

1075
00:55:41,120 --> 00:55:43,239
Speaker 1: But deep, deep down, I feel like we both had

1076
00:55:43,239 --> 00:55:46,080
Speaker 1: that mutual understanding that it was always going to be Clay,

1077
00:55:46,200 --> 00:55:48,920
Speaker 1: and I even told him that, and it was just

1078
00:55:48,920 --> 00:55:51,560
Speaker 1: like this obvious thing, like I almost felt like, Okay,

1079
00:55:51,600 --> 00:55:53,600
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have some fun. And I even told him like, hey,

1080
00:55:53,600 --> 00:55:55,160
Speaker 1: you're more than welcome to go on a date, like

1081
00:55:55,200 --> 00:55:57,759
Speaker 1: if someone were to show up while I'm gone, like

1082
00:55:57,840 --> 00:55:59,960
Speaker 1: please go take that date. But we had that mute,

1083
00:56:00,040 --> 00:56:04,000
Speaker 1: trull understanding and I just trusted him. We're off the

1084
00:56:04,040 --> 00:56:06,000
Speaker 1: bat even when you went on the date with Jordan,

1085
00:56:06,080 --> 00:56:10,919
Speaker 1: You're like, I'm just doing it to get sodity. I am. Yeah.

1086
00:56:10,960 --> 00:56:12,640
Speaker 1: And then people even saw me waving at him, and

1087
00:56:12,640 --> 00:56:14,560
Speaker 1: they thought they thought it was hilarious, but I actually

1088
00:56:14,640 --> 00:56:16,200
Speaker 1: was waving because I was like okay, bye, like can't

1089
00:56:16,200 --> 00:56:18,680
Speaker 1: wait to see you after I was actually I meant

1090
00:56:18,680 --> 00:56:20,480
Speaker 1: it like I meant by, like I was just like okay, bye,

1091
00:56:20,880 --> 00:56:24,080
Speaker 1: speak I knew nothing was going to happen. Sorry. Speaking

1092
00:56:24,080 --> 00:56:26,440
Speaker 1: of the date that you had with Jordan, I mean

1093
00:56:26,800 --> 00:56:29,160
Speaker 1: you had to have seen it because you were all

1094
00:56:29,160 --> 00:56:32,200
Speaker 1: over social media. I mean normally we say the gift

1095
00:56:32,239 --> 00:56:34,520
Speaker 1: that keeps on giving, but it was the gif the

1096
00:56:34,600 --> 00:56:37,359
Speaker 1: gift that kept on giving. Those faces that you were

1097
00:56:37,400 --> 00:56:41,360
Speaker 1: making on that hip line, I mean, how did you feel.

1098
00:56:41,400 --> 00:56:44,120
Speaker 1: Were you upset? Oh? My god? They were wrong for that.

1099
00:56:44,320 --> 00:56:47,680
Speaker 1: They were wrong. And you know there was like some

1100
00:56:47,840 --> 00:56:51,279
Speaker 1: weird fish eye lens on the camera or something. Your

1101
00:56:51,320 --> 00:56:54,920
Speaker 1: face was completely distorted, I know, But was that no?

1102
00:56:55,000 --> 00:56:57,160
Speaker 1: And of course I was. I'm like really really terrified

1103
00:56:57,160 --> 00:56:59,160
Speaker 1: of ride. I'm one of those people who I hate

1104
00:56:59,239 --> 00:57:01,319
Speaker 1: roller coasters. I hate I've never been zip lining. I

1105
00:57:01,280 --> 00:57:03,640
Speaker 1: would probably I'll probably never go again in my entire life,

1106
00:57:03,719 --> 00:57:06,680
Speaker 1: unless like I did as a joke with Jordan or something.

1107
00:57:07,000 --> 00:57:10,000
Speaker 1: But I was so terrified that in that little fisheye lens,

1108
00:57:10,040 --> 00:57:13,120
Speaker 1: I was just doing breathing exercises. That's why you see

1109
00:57:13,160 --> 00:57:15,400
Speaker 1: my lips like purse and like I do always creepy

1110
00:57:15,400 --> 00:57:18,360
Speaker 1: little mouth movement because because I'm like literally just breathing,

1111
00:57:18,360 --> 00:57:21,320
Speaker 1: I'm like, that was not you. I'm convinced that was

1112
00:57:21,360 --> 00:57:24,840
Speaker 1: not eating. It wasn't me and that. Yeah, we'll start

1113
00:57:24,840 --> 00:57:29,240
Speaker 1: that trend going hashtag not Nickele, not Nicole and put

1114
00:57:29,280 --> 00:57:31,640
Speaker 1: some like beauty pageant picture of me up, like this

1115
00:57:31,720 --> 00:57:34,000
Speaker 1: is the real hair. Well, maybe we'll put a beauty

1116
00:57:34,040 --> 00:57:37,440
Speaker 1: pageant picture up alongside these photos of the faces you're

1117
00:57:37,480 --> 00:57:41,800
Speaker 1: making up on bachelornation dot com. Oh, sorry, they're both

1118
00:57:41,840 --> 00:57:44,280
Speaker 1: gonna be there. I've actually already been doing it because

1119
00:57:44,320 --> 00:57:45,960
Speaker 1: I'm like, you know what, let me just beat the punch,

1120
00:57:46,160 --> 00:57:48,280
Speaker 1: like people are gonna be making fun of me forever,

1121
00:57:48,400 --> 00:57:50,840
Speaker 1: so let me just join in. Well, I've been tweeting

1122
00:57:50,880 --> 00:57:53,280
Speaker 1: like my own. I like that you can laugh at yourself,

1123
00:57:53,800 --> 00:57:56,000
Speaker 1: Yeah you have to. I was dying laughing. I just

1124
00:57:56,040 --> 00:57:59,480
Speaker 1: like I couldn't stop laughing. Okay, we're gonna take a

1125
00:57:59,520 --> 00:58:01,680
Speaker 1: quick breath and we'll be back with more Nicole on

1126
00:58:01,760 --> 00:58:04,280
Speaker 1: batchlor Happy Hour. All right, we are back in, Nicole.

1127
00:58:04,320 --> 00:58:07,080
Speaker 1: I've got to know what what what's in store for

1128
00:58:07,120 --> 00:58:08,800
Speaker 1: you in the season of Paradise. Are we going to

1129
00:58:08,880 --> 00:58:12,680
Speaker 1: see you and Clay walk off into the sunset. Well,

1130
00:58:12,760 --> 00:58:16,040
Speaker 1: I can't give away too much, but I will say

1131
00:58:16,040 --> 00:58:19,360
Speaker 1: it's gonna get juicy. It's gonna get fun and I'm

1132
00:58:19,360 --> 00:58:22,800
Speaker 1: excited for everyone to see. Is gonna be less drama.

1133
00:58:22,880 --> 00:58:24,680
Speaker 1: I mean, I kind of like the drama, but I'm

1134
00:58:24,680 --> 00:58:27,520
Speaker 1: also kind of over the Blake drama or is that

1135
00:58:27,680 --> 00:58:30,160
Speaker 1: is that still going? No? What I mean? I think

1136
00:58:31,120 --> 00:58:34,360
Speaker 1: we're gonna see a different some drama from some new faces.

1137
00:58:34,400 --> 00:58:36,960
Speaker 1: That's all I can say. Some new faces, some new drama.

1138
00:58:37,120 --> 00:58:40,360
Speaker 1: But I think, yeah, you're gonna see me go through

1139
00:58:40,400 --> 00:58:43,360
Speaker 1: a lot of emotions. But I'm gonna I don't know,

1140
00:58:43,480 --> 00:58:45,720
Speaker 1: it's gonna be pretty good and I'm excited for everyone

1141
00:58:45,760 --> 00:58:47,840
Speaker 1: to see. That's how we felt first fell in love

1142
00:58:47,880 --> 00:58:50,680
Speaker 1: with you. We're all the emotions that you showed us, Nicole,

1143
00:58:50,840 --> 00:58:52,360
Speaker 1: real quick, I want to give you a moment to

1144
00:58:52,400 --> 00:58:55,080
Speaker 1: speak on this because you've been active about this on Twitter.

1145
00:58:55,960 --> 00:58:58,800
Speaker 1: You have been I and I get this because you

1146
00:58:58,840 --> 00:59:02,640
Speaker 1: know there we need to be representative of the diversity

1147
00:59:02,880 --> 00:59:05,800
Speaker 1: that we do have on the show, and you've spoken out.

1148
00:59:06,880 --> 00:59:09,280
Speaker 1: I guess there would be people who have attacked you

1149
00:59:09,880 --> 00:59:12,320
Speaker 1: when it comes to speaking Spanish or trying to prove

1150
00:59:12,320 --> 00:59:14,880
Speaker 1: that you can speak Spanish, or just being Latin in general.

1151
00:59:15,280 --> 00:59:16,880
Speaker 1: And I want to give you a moment to really

1152
00:59:16,920 --> 00:59:19,200
Speaker 1: talk about that, because you have been vocal about that

1153
00:59:19,360 --> 00:59:25,360
Speaker 1: on Twitter. Yeah, I mean, I definitely know that I

1154
00:59:25,440 --> 00:59:27,840
Speaker 1: am a minority when it comes to the amount of

1155
00:59:27,880 --> 00:59:31,480
Speaker 1: like Latin women who have been in the franchise. So

1156
00:59:32,280 --> 00:59:35,080
Speaker 1: I do know that, you know, I have some responsibility

1157
00:59:35,160 --> 00:59:40,160
Speaker 1: just to carry myself into represent myself well because I

1158
00:59:40,240 --> 00:59:42,120
Speaker 1: know it is a big deal. I don't look like

1159
00:59:42,200 --> 00:59:46,480
Speaker 1: every other contestant, So it is you know, shocking or

1160
00:59:46,560 --> 00:59:53,280
Speaker 1: sad to see people just yeah like be like, oh,

1161
00:59:53,320 --> 00:59:55,360
Speaker 1: I can't I can't even tell the difference between be

1162
00:59:55,360 --> 00:59:59,280
Speaker 1: being Nicole or just little comments like that where you know,

1163
00:59:59,320 --> 01:00:04,600
Speaker 1: it's twenty nineteen. I mean, that's crazy. I can't believe

1164
01:00:04,640 --> 01:00:08,160
Speaker 1: people are saying that people are you. Yeah, it's hard

1165
01:00:08,200 --> 01:00:11,560
Speaker 1: to put to words because I've honestly been I haven't

1166
01:00:11,600 --> 01:00:14,840
Speaker 1: faced that much backlash over that, but yeah, there works

1167
01:00:14,880 --> 01:00:18,560
Speaker 1: are comments, some comments that I've been brave enough to

1168
01:00:18,600 --> 01:00:20,960
Speaker 1: call out. That's been kind of scary. You know, Twitter

1169
01:00:21,120 --> 01:00:24,360
Speaker 1: is like a dark hole sometimes, so I know that,

1170
01:00:24,480 --> 01:00:26,520
Speaker 1: you know, I have some haters whenever I call out

1171
01:00:26,560 --> 01:00:31,200
Speaker 1: certain things. But I truly love being Hispanic and I

1172
01:00:31,280 --> 01:00:34,400
Speaker 1: love representing that community on the Bachelor, and I think

1173
01:00:34,440 --> 01:00:37,920
Speaker 1: it's amazing, and hopefully more Latin girls start applying, we

1174
01:00:37,960 --> 01:00:39,959
Speaker 1: get more of that and more Latin guys and there's

1175
01:00:39,960 --> 01:00:42,520
Speaker 1: more flare and then you know, of all minorities, and

1176
01:00:42,640 --> 01:00:44,640
Speaker 1: that's why I want you to speak out about it,

1177
01:00:44,680 --> 01:00:49,320
Speaker 1: just because you're right, maybe a minority in Batster Nation,

1178
01:00:49,520 --> 01:00:53,920
Speaker 1: but not reflective of what you're representing in the real world.

1179
01:00:53,960 --> 01:00:55,600
Speaker 1: And so I just want you to have the opportunity.

1180
01:00:55,640 --> 01:00:57,240
Speaker 1: It is hard to sometimes speak out and to go

1181
01:00:57,320 --> 01:00:59,800
Speaker 1: against the grain, but you have and you are, and

1182
01:01:00,040 --> 01:01:02,320
Speaker 1: you are a beautiful representation of who you are. I

1183
01:01:02,400 --> 01:01:04,880
Speaker 1: just wanted to address that on the podcast because we're

1184
01:01:05,200 --> 01:01:08,640
Speaker 1: on this podcast, we are all about representing everybody. I

1185
01:01:08,720 --> 01:01:10,919
Speaker 1: couldn't agree more. And the amount of messages I get

1186
01:01:10,960 --> 01:01:13,920
Speaker 1: from all minorities and all girls across the country who

1187
01:01:13,960 --> 01:01:16,080
Speaker 1: are like, wow, like I relate to you, I relate

1188
01:01:16,120 --> 01:01:19,320
Speaker 1: to your story. I like I come from a similar

1189
01:01:19,360 --> 01:01:22,600
Speaker 1: family of immigrants, and it's just an incredible thing to

1190
01:01:22,720 --> 01:01:24,840
Speaker 1: know that you know, I've inspired them, and they're like, wait,

1191
01:01:24,920 --> 01:01:27,200
Speaker 1: should I be applying? Oh my gosh, like maybe I

1192
01:01:27,200 --> 01:01:30,600
Speaker 1: could see myself up there. Yes, And it's been wonderful. Yeah,

1193
01:01:30,640 --> 01:01:33,840
Speaker 1: you're definitely changing and making a positive impact on so

1194
01:01:33,880 --> 01:01:36,400
Speaker 1: many lives, so you should be very very proud of that.

1195
01:01:36,840 --> 01:01:39,400
Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Nicole, Thank you so much for

1196
01:01:39,520 --> 01:01:41,560
Speaker 1: calling in today. It was really great to talk to

1197
01:01:41,560 --> 01:01:44,600
Speaker 1: you and really, truly we cannot wait to see what

1198
01:01:44,680 --> 01:01:48,040
Speaker 1: the rest of Paradise has in store for you. Thanks Nicole. Okay,

1199
01:01:48,080 --> 01:01:49,880
Speaker 1: you guys, you know we love to hear from you,

1200
01:01:49,920 --> 01:01:51,400
Speaker 1: so you have to tell us what you like and

1201
01:01:51,520 --> 01:01:53,800
Speaker 1: what you don't like about our podcast. Tell us what

1202
01:01:53,880 --> 01:01:55,960
Speaker 1: you want to hear more of. We'd love to hear

1203
01:01:56,000 --> 01:01:58,840
Speaker 1: from you. You can email us at happy Hour at

1204
01:01:58,920 --> 01:02:02,320
Speaker 1: Bachelornation dot com, or you can visit us at bastnation

1205
01:02:02,400 --> 01:02:04,120
Speaker 1: dot com and click podcasts