1 00:00:01,880 --> 00:00:05,120 Speaker 1: Wind Down with Jamie Kramer and Michael Coffin and I'm 2 00:00:05,120 --> 00:00:06,399 Speaker 1: her radio podcast. 3 00:00:06,640 --> 00:00:09,159 Speaker 2: It's the holiday season. How hearted it that? 4 00:00:10,039 --> 00:00:15,120 Speaker 1: Yeah? That was last week, Hickory Dick. Another good show 5 00:00:15,160 --> 00:00:17,520 Speaker 1: coming your way, and we don't have any guests, but 6 00:00:17,880 --> 00:00:23,040 Speaker 1: we have some very interesting topics to talk about, some 7 00:00:24,200 --> 00:00:29,680 Speaker 1: current events, topical relational information, and we have Mark and 8 00:00:29,760 --> 00:00:31,880 Speaker 1: Easton and Becky and the whole crew here. So we 9 00:00:31,920 --> 00:00:33,720 Speaker 1: want you guys to chime in today since we don't 10 00:00:33,760 --> 00:00:35,239 Speaker 1: have any guess because they know people don't want to 11 00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:36,400 Speaker 1: listen to us for the next hour. 12 00:00:36,560 --> 00:00:38,360 Speaker 2: I don't know though, because I was just about to say, 13 00:00:38,560 --> 00:00:40,640 Speaker 2: why do you need guests? And we're the perfect train wreck. 14 00:00:41,880 --> 00:00:44,239 Speaker 2: People love to listen to the I mean someone had 15 00:00:44,240 --> 00:00:47,760 Speaker 2: said to me on Instagram just recently, I love listening 16 00:00:47,760 --> 00:00:50,879 Speaker 2: to your podcast. It's like the perfect train Like you 17 00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:52,519 Speaker 2: don't want to train wreck, like you don't want to 18 00:00:52,520 --> 00:00:53,000 Speaker 2: look away. 19 00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:58,280 Speaker 1: I was like, great, thanks, We're like a car crash. 20 00:00:58,520 --> 00:01:01,000 Speaker 1: You just want to rubberneck ads. You drive by and say, 21 00:01:01,040 --> 00:01:01,880 Speaker 1: at least that's not me. 22 00:01:05,880 --> 00:01:07,240 Speaker 2: Is that what you say when you see a crush? 23 00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:12,800 Speaker 1: No? I more so pray for them and hopefully everyone's okay. 24 00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:16,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, I would like to start off as the producer 25 00:01:16,880 --> 00:01:20,080 Speaker 2: Mark and be like, where's the energy today in the room. 26 00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:22,240 Speaker 2: I feel like you're annoyed. 27 00:01:22,400 --> 00:01:23,240 Speaker 1: You feel like I'm annoyed. 28 00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:27,400 Speaker 2: Welcome Mark, like I'm gonna I'm trying to get the goods. 29 00:01:28,360 --> 00:01:30,560 Speaker 1: First of all, I feel like you've been frustrated with 30 00:01:30,640 --> 00:01:34,399 Speaker 1: me this morning for whatever reason. Okay, a little on 31 00:01:34,440 --> 00:01:37,399 Speaker 1: the edge, and then I'm not annoyed. It's just so 32 00:01:39,880 --> 00:01:42,600 Speaker 1: I have to remind myself that, you know, swipe ups 33 00:01:42,600 --> 00:01:45,560 Speaker 1: and stuff that Janna does is basically why we're able 34 00:01:45,600 --> 00:01:48,800 Speaker 1: to be in the house that we're in. But being 35 00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:53,440 Speaker 1: in the room while she's posting those and having to 36 00:01:53,520 --> 00:01:58,080 Speaker 1: type of things, and she has the slide the sound on, 37 00:01:58,640 --> 00:02:01,840 Speaker 1: so you just hear the same thing over and over 38 00:02:02,120 --> 00:02:05,639 Speaker 1: and over and over again for like ten to fifteen 39 00:02:05,640 --> 00:02:09,000 Speaker 1: minutes as she does the stuff that she has to do. Now, 40 00:02:09,080 --> 00:02:11,799 Speaker 1: Fortunately Janna calls herself out and she's like, shut up, Jana, 41 00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:18,079 Speaker 1: I do, but you have the sound on, which which 42 00:02:18,120 --> 00:02:22,200 Speaker 1: I need. Which, yeah, I have more empathy towards now 43 00:02:22,320 --> 00:02:25,200 Speaker 1: after doing Mike Monday than having to do some of 44 00:02:25,200 --> 00:02:27,400 Speaker 1: those myself. I get why you need the sound on. 45 00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:29,520 Speaker 1: I don't get why you need it all the way 46 00:02:29,600 --> 00:02:31,960 Speaker 1: up to eleven, but I get why you need it on. 47 00:02:32,600 --> 00:02:34,880 Speaker 1: And so I'm sitting here ready to do our podcast, 48 00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:39,840 Speaker 1: and I just here for five solid minutes. Get it 49 00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:41,000 Speaker 1: your head? What was it? 50 00:02:41,600 --> 00:02:42,760 Speaker 2: Hell a body, which, by the way, I. 51 00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:45,840 Speaker 1: Love I love Hello Botty too. Get your body right 52 00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:51,079 Speaker 1: now before Christmas. Swipe up, swipe up. And I'm just like, okay, like, 53 00:02:51,360 --> 00:02:53,600 Speaker 1: any any minute now, she's gonna be done. And then 54 00:02:53,960 --> 00:02:56,079 Speaker 1: another five minutes. Any minute now, she's gonna be done. 55 00:02:56,120 --> 00:02:56,920 Speaker 1: Another five minutes. 56 00:02:57,560 --> 00:03:00,760 Speaker 2: That's the exaggeration. It took me five minutes to post it. 57 00:03:01,720 --> 00:03:03,640 Speaker 1: Which if you sit there in time and sit here 58 00:03:03,680 --> 00:03:06,480 Speaker 1: and listen that for five solid minutes, it feels like 59 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:07,280 Speaker 1: a lot longer. 60 00:03:08,919 --> 00:03:11,840 Speaker 2: I'm sorry for providing for but other than that, I'm great. 61 00:03:13,680 --> 00:03:15,640 Speaker 1: Other than that, I'm fantastic. So what about you? 62 00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:16,720 Speaker 2: Are you though? 63 00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:19,600 Speaker 1: I am because I felt like this morning, you're like, 64 00:03:19,840 --> 00:03:22,080 Speaker 1: we gotta move this tree in our room. We got it. 65 00:03:22,480 --> 00:03:25,480 Speaker 2: I'm the kind of person when it's when there's clutter 66 00:03:26,360 --> 00:03:29,560 Speaker 2: in my way at one like I let it go. 67 00:03:29,760 --> 00:03:31,040 Speaker 2: I let it go, I let it go, and then 68 00:03:31,040 --> 00:03:33,880 Speaker 2: I'm like, this fucking tree needs to move like it's 69 00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:37,200 Speaker 2: been in and you're like, it's not in your area. 70 00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:39,920 Speaker 2: I'm like, it's halfway in my side table, Like I 71 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:41,880 Speaker 2: just want it back to where it's at, like the 72 00:03:41,880 --> 00:03:45,840 Speaker 2: original place. And so I just kind of I I 73 00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:49,400 Speaker 2: let things go until I just snap until I'm just 74 00:03:49,440 --> 00:03:51,040 Speaker 2: like I want it in its right place. 75 00:03:51,160 --> 00:03:55,960 Speaker 1: For the record, let's just say include that it could 76 00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:58,160 Speaker 1: be your stuff too, that you'll just let go, let go, 77 00:03:58,200 --> 00:03:59,680 Speaker 1: and then you'll just snap at your own stuff and 78 00:03:59,680 --> 00:04:00,800 Speaker 1: be like, I gotta put this away. 79 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:03,960 Speaker 2: Sure, absolutely, yeah, I mean most times it's not. 80 00:04:04,360 --> 00:04:10,880 Speaker 1: You know, I beg to differ. Okay, do you leave 81 00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:12,960 Speaker 1: more stuff around the house than I? 82 00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:15,880 Speaker 2: I leave shoes and them in the middle of the 83 00:04:15,960 --> 00:04:20,679 Speaker 2: room though in every room in this house, right, I do, granted, 84 00:04:21,040 --> 00:04:23,000 Speaker 2: but I do not leave them in the middle of 85 00:04:23,040 --> 00:04:25,040 Speaker 2: the room. They are placed nicely in the corner of 86 00:04:25,080 --> 00:04:27,320 Speaker 2: every room. Like my white shoes are in the corner 87 00:04:27,720 --> 00:04:30,520 Speaker 2: by the thing. Now I gotta and I move the 88 00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:33,560 Speaker 2: other pairs. But at least I don't leave them in 89 00:04:33,560 --> 00:04:36,000 Speaker 2: the middle of the room, Like I'm not tripping over 90 00:04:36,040 --> 00:04:36,520 Speaker 2: the shoes. 91 00:04:36,800 --> 00:04:37,960 Speaker 1: Where do you trip over shoes? 92 00:04:38,080 --> 00:04:40,640 Speaker 2: Oh my god, you're stupid. Sandals I pep over them. 93 00:04:41,600 --> 00:04:43,960 Speaker 2: I'm so glad we have couples therapy after this, Mark, 94 00:04:44,120 --> 00:04:45,400 Speaker 2: you want to chime in a are you just gonna 95 00:04:45,480 --> 00:04:46,920 Speaker 2: let this train go for a bust? 96 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:48,520 Speaker 1: You know there's a. 97 00:04:48,480 --> 00:04:50,719 Speaker 3: Balance there because a lot of times I need to 98 00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:53,120 Speaker 3: be quiet and let it play out. But I will say, 99 00:04:53,320 --> 00:04:55,400 Speaker 3: you know, you and Mike, you have a lot of 100 00:04:55,440 --> 00:04:59,240 Speaker 3: issues on this podcast that are major and make us 101 00:04:59,279 --> 00:05:02,239 Speaker 3: fear for you future. This is none of those things, 102 00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:04,440 Speaker 3: and that's good. I think I think this is positive. 103 00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:07,960 Speaker 1: I you know what, I'll second that was saying Jane 104 00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:10,200 Speaker 1: and I dreamed about the day that we would have 105 00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:15,080 Speaker 1: normal marriage arguments, and we're we are there, We're having 106 00:05:15,080 --> 00:05:16,320 Speaker 1: normal marriage arguments. 107 00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:17,680 Speaker 3: Yes three. 108 00:05:21,360 --> 00:05:23,720 Speaker 2: I just love it that Mark even's like we all 109 00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:26,599 Speaker 2: fear your relationship, but this one's actually like normal. 110 00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:29,520 Speaker 3: Can I tell you something that I think you might 111 00:05:29,560 --> 00:05:30,200 Speaker 3: get a kick out of. 112 00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:30,920 Speaker 1: Yes, please. 113 00:05:31,400 --> 00:05:33,640 Speaker 3: We got an email from you guys saying we're running 114 00:05:33,640 --> 00:05:36,599 Speaker 3: ten minutes late every time we get. 115 00:05:36,400 --> 00:05:43,520 Speaker 2: That even we're like, uh oh, I totally hear you 116 00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:45,600 Speaker 2: on that. That makes so much sense. 117 00:05:45,760 --> 00:05:48,840 Speaker 1: That makes all the world, I mean. 118 00:05:49,600 --> 00:05:53,400 Speaker 2: And granted, because you know, a married couple working together, 119 00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:54,080 Speaker 2: you're gonna have. 120 00:05:54,040 --> 00:05:58,840 Speaker 1: Your It's it's hard, man, It's hard when, especially when 121 00:05:58,839 --> 00:06:01,080 Speaker 1: you have to put on a face and come on 122 00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:03,000 Speaker 1: and talk about relationships. 123 00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:07,880 Speaker 2: No, really, though, this time running ten minutes late was 124 00:06:07,920 --> 00:06:10,880 Speaker 2: just because Mike was annoyed because I was doing slipe ups. 125 00:06:11,279 --> 00:06:14,800 Speaker 1: No, it was because you ran longer on the treadmill 126 00:06:14,839 --> 00:06:17,120 Speaker 1: that he expect. You really went after it today. You 127 00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:18,720 Speaker 1: took a shower and you wanted to do that post 128 00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:20,600 Speaker 1: before we podcast it, and he said, we don't have 129 00:06:20,640 --> 00:06:23,599 Speaker 1: any guests today, so can I finish this before? I said, sure, 130 00:06:23,680 --> 00:06:25,520 Speaker 1: I'll email the team. 131 00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:27,960 Speaker 2: And meanwhile the team's like, oh crap. 132 00:06:28,960 --> 00:06:32,120 Speaker 1: We're in for it today. Make sure Mark's on here. 133 00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:33,599 Speaker 1: He's got to produce this shit. 134 00:06:34,680 --> 00:06:35,680 Speaker 2: Mark will really get it. 135 00:06:35,920 --> 00:06:39,400 Speaker 1: Mark will really get it out of him, exactly the conversation, 136 00:06:39,640 --> 00:06:40,159 Speaker 1: Uh huh. 137 00:06:40,200 --> 00:06:42,840 Speaker 2: And really, what it is is I want this tree 138 00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:45,719 Speaker 2: to move. He wants me to put my shoes away. 139 00:06:45,720 --> 00:06:49,040 Speaker 2: He wants me to turn down the volume of my Instagram. 140 00:06:49,880 --> 00:06:51,880 Speaker 2: What else, honey? Is there anything else? 141 00:06:53,240 --> 00:06:58,080 Speaker 1: I just it goes back to this over the underlying 142 00:06:58,160 --> 00:07:00,719 Speaker 1: topic or really the big the big picture here of 143 00:07:02,279 --> 00:07:06,960 Speaker 1: I don't think men say as much to their significant others. 144 00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:11,600 Speaker 1: Female significant others about that stuff, like, because I'll give 145 00:07:11,600 --> 00:07:13,920 Speaker 1: you a benefit of doubt, she'll move that once she's ready. 146 00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:19,200 Speaker 1: And but one it's the other way around when we're like, 147 00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:21,120 Speaker 1: was ISHO, you gotta move it. 148 00:07:21,760 --> 00:07:25,400 Speaker 2: So I don't know, but I've done a I've done 149 00:07:25,440 --> 00:07:28,160 Speaker 2: a test. I've been testing you on something. 150 00:07:29,760 --> 00:07:34,880 Speaker 1: That's not triggering. I love being tested. 151 00:07:35,760 --> 00:07:37,160 Speaker 2: No, it's like a stupid test. 152 00:07:37,400 --> 00:07:38,040 Speaker 1: Let's hear it. 153 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:40,160 Speaker 2: It's about exactly what you were saying. 154 00:07:40,280 --> 00:07:40,800 Speaker 1: Let's hear it. 155 00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:45,480 Speaker 2: So I have left a bag in the bathroom for 156 00:07:45,520 --> 00:07:49,640 Speaker 2: the last month. Now, granted it's on my side. Okay, 157 00:07:50,520 --> 00:07:51,440 Speaker 2: have you noticed it all? 158 00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:51,880 Speaker 1: Yes? 159 00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:55,280 Speaker 2: Okay, So the bag has been sitting on my side 160 00:07:55,320 --> 00:07:58,480 Speaker 2: of the shower, not really in my way, but it's 161 00:07:58,520 --> 00:08:03,960 Speaker 2: still in our communal area. And I'm like, I'm going 162 00:08:04,040 --> 00:08:06,600 Speaker 2: to leave it there until he says something. And by 163 00:08:06,600 --> 00:08:10,800 Speaker 2: the way, it's been driving me mad like bunkers. And 164 00:08:10,880 --> 00:08:13,560 Speaker 2: it's been a month and he still has yet to 165 00:08:13,680 --> 00:08:14,320 Speaker 2: say something. 166 00:08:14,480 --> 00:08:15,760 Speaker 1: The defense rests. 167 00:08:17,240 --> 00:08:19,320 Speaker 3: So is he passed the test or failed the test. 168 00:08:19,440 --> 00:08:20,160 Speaker 1: I've passed. 169 00:08:20,560 --> 00:08:23,760 Speaker 2: I think you passed right, But he's passed in the 170 00:08:23,840 --> 00:08:24,720 Speaker 2: negative sense. 171 00:08:26,280 --> 00:08:28,520 Speaker 1: So now I'm supposed to write her ass and say 172 00:08:28,560 --> 00:08:29,360 Speaker 1: something about it. 173 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:34,640 Speaker 2: No, but it where my case rests is that I'm like, guys, 174 00:08:34,800 --> 00:08:38,440 Speaker 2: just don't care. That is laying everywhere. You don't care, 175 00:08:39,960 --> 00:08:41,080 Speaker 2: and that bothers me. 176 00:08:42,480 --> 00:08:45,040 Speaker 1: But I have my breaking point with like my stuff 177 00:08:45,080 --> 00:08:47,560 Speaker 1: too that's laying around or things that are cuttered. I 178 00:08:47,559 --> 00:08:50,600 Speaker 1: have my breaking point too. But for you, that bag 179 00:08:50,640 --> 00:08:53,160 Speaker 1: doesn't affect me in any way, shape or form. I 180 00:08:53,160 --> 00:08:55,600 Speaker 1: don't walk over on that side of the shower. It's 181 00:08:55,640 --> 00:08:57,920 Speaker 1: on your side. I have nothing in the linen closet 182 00:08:58,280 --> 00:09:01,760 Speaker 1: that it's by, so really it didn't bother me. And 183 00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:04,400 Speaker 1: I keep seeing. I'm like, well if she I know 184 00:09:04,440 --> 00:09:05,920 Speaker 1: how she is, if she wants to move it, she'll 185 00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:14,360 Speaker 1: move it. And you know, I've I feel as a 186 00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:16,840 Speaker 1: guide too, because maybe I'll leave more things laying around 187 00:09:16,920 --> 00:09:19,080 Speaker 1: if I say something. My fear is that you're going 188 00:09:19,160 --> 00:09:21,840 Speaker 1: to be You're not going to take it receptively, and 189 00:09:21,840 --> 00:09:23,640 Speaker 1: you're gonna be like, well you got to move your shoes. 190 00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:28,040 Speaker 1: I'm like, damn, okay, Yeah, you've given him a test. 191 00:09:28,040 --> 00:09:29,400 Speaker 3: It's impossible for him to pass. 192 00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:31,679 Speaker 2: I do I do hear you now that? Like you 193 00:09:31,720 --> 00:09:34,600 Speaker 2: say that, I understand that, and I can empathize with 194 00:09:34,640 --> 00:09:37,240 Speaker 2: that because I'm like, you know, and actually I think 195 00:09:37,280 --> 00:09:39,520 Speaker 2: I would be upset if like you said something, because 196 00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:41,120 Speaker 2: I'd be like, well, why don't you move the stuff 197 00:09:41,160 --> 00:09:44,520 Speaker 2: next to your table? But I think the point is that, 198 00:09:44,559 --> 00:09:46,840 Speaker 2: like you don't like men just don't care that there's 199 00:09:46,880 --> 00:09:48,480 Speaker 2: stuff not in the right place. And I think, as 200 00:09:48,520 --> 00:09:50,800 Speaker 2: a woman, that drives me mad because I'm like, I 201 00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:52,840 Speaker 2: would love to move this stuff that's been next to 202 00:09:52,920 --> 00:09:55,720 Speaker 2: your like table for a while and find its place. 203 00:09:56,480 --> 00:09:58,800 Speaker 2: Now you can look around now and find things in 204 00:09:58,840 --> 00:09:59,480 Speaker 2: their room. 205 00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:03,679 Speaker 1: But the time is notoriously filthy. 206 00:10:04,760 --> 00:10:08,240 Speaker 2: I don't want to hear it. Like the most random 207 00:10:08,360 --> 00:10:11,120 Speaker 2: stuff like that just stays on the nights. I'm constantly 208 00:10:11,160 --> 00:10:11,719 Speaker 2: cleaning the nights. 209 00:10:11,920 --> 00:10:18,800 Speaker 1: No you're not. I mean, oh my Lanta. 210 00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:20,440 Speaker 2: This is I will say. 211 00:10:20,440 --> 00:10:20,600 Speaker 3: Though. 212 00:10:20,640 --> 00:10:23,040 Speaker 2: So we were having a girl's night the other night, 213 00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:27,280 Speaker 2: and every single woman there was like, we have to 214 00:10:27,320 --> 00:10:29,800 Speaker 2: say something to our husbands, like it's just a part 215 00:10:29,880 --> 00:10:31,680 Speaker 2: of our And I was like, and I went to 216 00:10:31,760 --> 00:10:35,680 Speaker 2: therapy going why do I always have to say something 217 00:10:35,840 --> 00:10:37,320 Speaker 2: like what what part of me? 218 00:10:37,559 --> 00:10:37,640 Speaker 3: Like? 219 00:10:37,840 --> 00:10:40,600 Speaker 2: Why is what am I needing? What am I looking for? 220 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:44,960 Speaker 2: Why am I always wanting to say something, and you know, 221 00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:47,720 Speaker 2: she really brought it around and made me understand it 222 00:10:47,760 --> 00:10:50,200 Speaker 2: a little bit more. And you know, at the end 223 00:10:50,200 --> 00:10:51,880 Speaker 2: of the day too, it is just like a woman 224 00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:55,400 Speaker 2: man thing, like we just want things put away and 225 00:10:55,559 --> 00:10:59,120 Speaker 2: we are more we have we are more inquisitive, and 226 00:10:59,160 --> 00:11:01,760 Speaker 2: we have more questions and like it's just a man 227 00:11:01,840 --> 00:11:05,640 Speaker 2: versus woman, like we just not we don't care about things, 228 00:11:05,640 --> 00:11:09,640 Speaker 2: but we just I don't know, is it hitting the 229 00:11:09,640 --> 00:11:11,200 Speaker 2: effort in or I. 230 00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:15,679 Speaker 1: Think there's something underlying for women where it's like, you 231 00:11:17,360 --> 00:11:20,120 Speaker 1: not to generalize, but I feel like most women tend 232 00:11:20,160 --> 00:11:25,360 Speaker 1: to see how we handle a certain situation and mimic 233 00:11:25,400 --> 00:11:29,280 Speaker 1: that to maybe what we feel about y'all. Well, so 234 00:11:29,360 --> 00:11:32,160 Speaker 1: you're like, well, if he doesn't care about this bag, 235 00:11:32,200 --> 00:11:33,960 Speaker 1: that means he doesn't care about me. If you don't 236 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,000 Speaker 1: care about keeping this house clean, does that mean he 237 00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:37,720 Speaker 1: doesn't care about this family and care about me and 238 00:11:37,760 --> 00:11:40,199 Speaker 1: care about what I need? And so it's like, y'all, 239 00:11:40,760 --> 00:11:43,679 Speaker 1: you know, you get on me about taking things personal. Yeah, 240 00:11:43,720 --> 00:11:45,599 Speaker 1: but it's like those kind of things, the day to 241 00:11:45,679 --> 00:11:49,120 Speaker 1: day things women tend to take more personally as a 242 00:11:49,200 --> 00:11:51,600 Speaker 1: reflection on how we feel about y'all. 243 00:11:52,080 --> 00:11:54,439 Speaker 2: Yeah, And that's something my therapist said. She's like, what's 244 00:11:54,520 --> 00:11:57,280 Speaker 2: really underneath the question? Like why are you really asking it? 245 00:11:57,320 --> 00:11:59,280 Speaker 2: Like is it because that you feel like he doesn't care? 246 00:11:59,360 --> 00:12:01,880 Speaker 2: Or is it because you know? And there's there's there 247 00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:05,440 Speaker 2: was different answers for different questions, and some were just 248 00:12:05,480 --> 00:12:08,199 Speaker 2: like and but it's funny though, because every single woman 249 00:12:08,280 --> 00:12:10,120 Speaker 2: at that girl's night was just like, Oh, I do 250 00:12:10,200 --> 00:12:13,040 Speaker 2: that all the time. Like, for example, when her husband 251 00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:14,960 Speaker 2: came home with too many groceries, why do you have 252 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:17,439 Speaker 2: to get more groceries than what I you know, why 253 00:12:17,480 --> 00:12:18,480 Speaker 2: do you have to get double of that? 254 00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:18,640 Speaker 3: Now? 255 00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:21,040 Speaker 2: I don't have room? It's like, well, why does she 256 00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:22,520 Speaker 2: have to say that? But it bothers her that he 257 00:12:22,559 --> 00:12:25,480 Speaker 2: gets more groceries and like she has no room to 258 00:12:25,480 --> 00:12:27,880 Speaker 2: fill in her pantry and she likes things order and neat, 259 00:12:27,960 --> 00:12:30,920 Speaker 2: and and he's like, why who cares? I got an 260 00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:34,760 Speaker 2: extra peanut butter? You know. But it's it's just yeah't know, 261 00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:37,600 Speaker 2: it's just interesting, like why we always have to say something. 262 00:12:38,280 --> 00:12:42,840 Speaker 1: Yeah, I genuinely do give you benefit of a doubt, 263 00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:46,120 Speaker 1: Like I'm just like, okay, if she'll put that away. 264 00:12:46,240 --> 00:12:49,439 Speaker 1: She's an adult, you know. If it was something sitting 265 00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:51,000 Speaker 1: in the middle of the room. Yeah, it's one thing, 266 00:12:51,040 --> 00:12:54,960 Speaker 1: but it's it's not something affecting me, you know, directly. 267 00:12:56,120 --> 00:12:58,880 Speaker 1: But you're an adult and you'll put it away, you 268 00:12:58,960 --> 00:13:01,400 Speaker 1: know what I mean. It's like my closets. My side 269 00:13:01,400 --> 00:13:02,560 Speaker 1: of closet is a mess right now, and I got 270 00:13:02,679 --> 00:13:05,920 Speaker 1: to put those clothes away, and it's like, yeah, if 271 00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:08,160 Speaker 1: it was like that for a long period of time, 272 00:13:08,160 --> 00:13:09,959 Speaker 1: I'm sure you would say something. Anybody would. 273 00:13:10,880 --> 00:13:12,600 Speaker 2: I've never seen your side of the closet clean. 274 00:13:13,440 --> 00:13:15,240 Speaker 1: It's like as soon as I do, it gets dirty again. 275 00:13:15,280 --> 00:13:19,360 Speaker 2: It's never I mean the last house that we were in, 276 00:13:19,400 --> 00:13:21,240 Speaker 2: thank God, we had different closets and I was just 277 00:13:21,280 --> 00:13:24,360 Speaker 2: able to shut it. But now our closets are together. 278 00:13:24,520 --> 00:13:26,959 Speaker 2: It's a very and it's a small closet. It's way 279 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:30,040 Speaker 2: smaller than any closets minus the La home. But you know, 280 00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:33,280 Speaker 2: it's a small closet and it is I have to 281 00:13:33,520 --> 00:13:37,160 Speaker 2: purposely not look left because it just gives me anxiety. 282 00:13:38,320 --> 00:13:41,560 Speaker 1: Jana has made comments before, Hey, you know the dishwashers 283 00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:43,120 Speaker 1: like dirty. You know it's empty. 284 00:13:43,160 --> 00:13:45,480 Speaker 2: You can throw stuff in there, Yeah, because you've been 285 00:13:45,559 --> 00:13:48,080 Speaker 2: leaving them just in there. And I will say this. 286 00:13:49,040 --> 00:13:52,880 Speaker 1: Let me finish. Oka Jana will do the same. At times, 287 00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:57,320 Speaker 1: I've never said anything. I've either left them there or 288 00:13:57,400 --> 00:13:59,800 Speaker 1: I've just put them in the dishwasher. But I don't say, hey, 289 00:13:59,840 --> 00:14:02,640 Speaker 1: I yes, I'll put your plate in the dishwasher. I'll 290 00:14:02,679 --> 00:14:06,280 Speaker 1: just do it. It's just there, you know. So it's 291 00:14:06,320 --> 00:14:09,640 Speaker 1: like the why say something it's a dirty dish. If 292 00:14:09,679 --> 00:14:12,960 Speaker 1: it was an everyday thing that was constantly happening, that's 293 00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:16,439 Speaker 1: one thing. But you and I share the dish's responsibility. 294 00:14:17,320 --> 00:14:21,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, you've just got a little lazier lately with not 295 00:14:21,040 --> 00:14:24,200 Speaker 2: putting it in. I'm just saying, like you have like 296 00:14:24,240 --> 00:14:26,960 Speaker 2: a little I've been emptying the dishwasher so much and 297 00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:28,480 Speaker 2: you've just been like leaving your plates there. I'm like, 298 00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:30,480 Speaker 2: it takes two seconds to put it in the dishwasher. 299 00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:34,760 Speaker 1: I told you we empty an equal amount, right. 300 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:36,400 Speaker 2: But there was about a week there where it was 301 00:14:36,480 --> 00:14:38,360 Speaker 2: just like babe, right, see. 302 00:14:38,160 --> 00:14:39,720 Speaker 1: And that's what happens. A week goes by, and it 303 00:14:39,760 --> 00:14:41,840 Speaker 1: happens a couple of times, and then all of a sudden, 304 00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:47,040 Speaker 1: it's this big, not big, it's like pandemic that's happening, Yes, 305 00:14:47,280 --> 00:14:51,000 Speaker 1: within our household. Pandemic within a pandemic, the inception of 306 00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:53,600 Speaker 1: a pandemic in our household. That whoa. You know, Mike, 307 00:14:53,680 --> 00:14:56,200 Speaker 1: he just really leaves his plates around. 308 00:14:57,360 --> 00:15:01,200 Speaker 2: You know what, I need to take a break and 309 00:15:01,240 --> 00:15:16,200 Speaker 2: I'm gonna go up to the dishwasher. Go ahead, what 310 00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:17,080 Speaker 2: do you got for us? 311 00:15:17,480 --> 00:15:21,520 Speaker 1: All right? So Dancing with the Stars, that's your squad. 312 00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:27,520 Speaker 1: Chrishelle stous is dating your boy ko I love Q. 313 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:29,440 Speaker 2: I texted him the other day and was like, you 314 00:15:29,560 --> 00:15:33,960 Speaker 2: finally found your queen because when I was on Dancing 315 00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:35,720 Speaker 2: with the Stars, he was always and he's got that 316 00:15:36,600 --> 00:15:39,600 Speaker 2: accent and he's just like, you know, I always said, 317 00:15:39,600 --> 00:15:41,880 Speaker 2: like I'm trying to find my queen. That's not his 318 00:15:41,960 --> 00:15:44,480 Speaker 2: accent at all. But I'm just like, he just he's 319 00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:47,040 Speaker 2: the most lovable. I loved him so much. He was 320 00:15:47,040 --> 00:15:53,960 Speaker 2: probably my closest dancer guy friend there. And he I'm 321 00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:56,840 Speaker 2: just so happy for him, like I truly am. Because 322 00:15:56,840 --> 00:15:58,640 Speaker 2: and he was just like, oh here, I'm gonna tell 323 00:15:58,640 --> 00:16:02,320 Speaker 2: you what he said back. I think it's fine, he goes. 324 00:16:03,640 --> 00:16:08,720 Speaker 2: He said to me. I texted him cue Yeah, I said, ah, 325 00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:11,440 Speaker 2: you finally found your queen. Happy freebabe, the most deserving 326 00:16:11,480 --> 00:16:14,040 Speaker 2: And he goes the queen. I will cherish forever. Thank you, 327 00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:18,480 Speaker 2: my hon. I'm just like, it's so sweet and she 328 00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:23,440 Speaker 2: deserves love because I mean, we had her on our 329 00:16:23,440 --> 00:16:25,320 Speaker 2: podcast and she was so sweet and I don't know 330 00:16:25,320 --> 00:16:28,120 Speaker 2: what happened with her and Justin, but it seemed like it. 331 00:16:28,280 --> 00:16:30,400 Speaker 2: She was kind of shocked by it all. So I'm 332 00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:33,880 Speaker 2: I hope that they last and they they work out. 333 00:16:33,880 --> 00:16:38,400 Speaker 2: I mean it worked for Artam and Bella Bella. 334 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:40,320 Speaker 1: Is that her name? Niki Nikki bell Nikki Nikki. 335 00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:44,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, so they were partners but no first kid, but 336 00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:46,840 Speaker 2: I mean these Krishelle was partners with Gleb and I 337 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:53,080 Speaker 2: felt bad because gled Got is getting divorced and and 338 00:16:53,120 --> 00:16:56,120 Speaker 2: so everyone thought like that was right. So I felt 339 00:16:56,200 --> 00:16:58,120 Speaker 2: really bad that she got looped in again into like. 340 00:16:58,120 --> 00:17:02,040 Speaker 1: Drama of that, right, So well, good for them. 341 00:17:02,280 --> 00:17:04,800 Speaker 2: There's an age difference though, because Keyo's younger. 342 00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:07,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, but I mean, what eight years? 343 00:17:07,800 --> 00:17:13,520 Speaker 2: I feel like she's older eight years. I don't know. 344 00:17:13,560 --> 00:17:15,520 Speaker 2: I mean I kind of like, I feel like if 345 00:17:15,520 --> 00:17:17,600 Speaker 2: it's an eight year difference, like that man's gonna tweet 346 00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:21,280 Speaker 2: treat her like a total queen or there could be 347 00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:23,160 Speaker 2: a maturity. But I don't think he was immature. 348 00:17:24,080 --> 00:17:26,480 Speaker 1: No, I mean he's in his thirties, right, Yeah, he's 349 00:17:26,520 --> 00:17:32,040 Speaker 1: thirty one. She's thirty nine. So I think when you're 350 00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:36,680 Speaker 1: in your into your thirties, you've matured enough. 351 00:17:39,440 --> 00:17:42,480 Speaker 2: I don't know, man, I did some older dudes that 352 00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:45,000 Speaker 2: were like twenty years older, and they were not mature. 353 00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:48,520 Speaker 1: Oh for sure, we're still I mean we're still big kids. 354 00:17:48,680 --> 00:17:53,920 Speaker 2: But yeah, I mean I'm happy for them, though. Yeah, 355 00:17:54,040 --> 00:17:55,160 Speaker 2: do you got anything else for us? 356 00:17:55,359 --> 00:17:57,919 Speaker 1: Yeah? How about this? So this was an article on 357 00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:01,800 Speaker 1: the New York Post. Okay, an Instagram model helps women 358 00:18:01,880 --> 00:18:04,320 Speaker 1: catch cheating men by sliding into their dms. 359 00:18:05,119 --> 00:18:12,000 Speaker 2: Genius. Trust me, I've thought of I thought of trying to. 360 00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:16,760 Speaker 2: There was this one thing. It was called like, oh 361 00:18:16,840 --> 00:18:18,960 Speaker 2: my god, what was it called. There was some company 362 00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:24,280 Speaker 2: where basically a it's a like a catch of cheaters. 363 00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:28,760 Speaker 2: But it was called something, and it was almost what 364 00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:31,320 Speaker 2: I was going to do, like before, like I found 365 00:18:31,320 --> 00:18:35,119 Speaker 2: out about things. It's like you hire someone to basically 366 00:18:35,119 --> 00:18:38,679 Speaker 2: I'm like, Okay, my husband's at public's go and you 367 00:18:38,800 --> 00:18:42,960 Speaker 2: hire this woman to go and basically try to like 368 00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:45,400 Speaker 2: slide in and see what they're going to do. It's 369 00:18:45,520 --> 00:18:52,000 Speaker 2: genius having said that it's fire, because what dude isn't 370 00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:53,680 Speaker 2: going to be I mean, this model's beautiful. 371 00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:57,919 Speaker 1: Yeah, but you know, I was reading it and she 372 00:18:57,960 --> 00:19:02,399 Speaker 1: actually said she actually said only a few lied and 373 00:19:02,440 --> 00:19:05,480 Speaker 1: said they're single. She said that actually most of the 374 00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:08,960 Speaker 1: men either didn't answer, they said something mean to her, 375 00:19:09,160 --> 00:19:11,560 Speaker 1: or informed them or informed her that they had a 376 00:19:11,600 --> 00:19:15,000 Speaker 1: girlfriend or were together. So I wasn't couraged to hear that. 377 00:19:17,040 --> 00:19:20,880 Speaker 1: Say that happens in a new relationship and someone does 378 00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:24,640 Speaker 1: that from like early on in the relationship, what does 379 00:19:24,680 --> 00:19:28,800 Speaker 1: this say? You know, a new relationship does this. Maybe 380 00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,800 Speaker 1: they have some reasons or maybe maybe a person that's 381 00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:35,800 Speaker 1: insecurity does Like has someone try to catch their partner 382 00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:40,199 Speaker 1: and you're the partner and you find out about it, 383 00:19:42,440 --> 00:19:46,040 Speaker 1: Like do you think they could recover after that? Like 384 00:19:46,080 --> 00:19:48,200 Speaker 1: if there's no infidelity at all, no cheating at all, 385 00:19:49,359 --> 00:19:53,120 Speaker 1: been together six months to a year, still new relationship 386 00:19:53,520 --> 00:19:56,000 Speaker 1: and your significant other sets you up like that but 387 00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:58,159 Speaker 1: there isn't anything to be found and you say no 388 00:19:58,240 --> 00:20:00,000 Speaker 1: and deny it and you find out that. 389 00:20:01,119 --> 00:20:03,600 Speaker 2: You know, if I got set up like that, and 390 00:20:03,640 --> 00:20:05,720 Speaker 2: I would think for the guide too, if they got 391 00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:09,639 Speaker 2: like I would, that's sneaky and that's crappy, like to 392 00:20:09,840 --> 00:20:12,399 Speaker 2: randomly set someone up, I would be I'd be like, 393 00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:13,720 Speaker 2: f you man. 394 00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:15,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what I'm saying. 395 00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:19,240 Speaker 2: Not cool, Like I would be like bye, now was 396 00:20:19,280 --> 00:20:19,960 Speaker 2: it a genius? 397 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:20,880 Speaker 3: Just like five minutes ago? 398 00:20:21,280 --> 00:20:24,560 Speaker 2: Only if they're like a cheater, like if to see 399 00:20:24,560 --> 00:20:27,040 Speaker 2: if they would cheat again, that's why I would do it. Sorry, 400 00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:29,480 Speaker 2: I guess I miss I misspoke there. It's only if 401 00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:32,320 Speaker 2: it was if they were like that makes sense, have 402 00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:34,600 Speaker 2: already cheated, right, let's see if you do it again. 403 00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:37,080 Speaker 2: Because you most people are like I won't stay with 404 00:20:37,119 --> 00:20:39,159 Speaker 2: you if you do it again, like if you did 405 00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:41,640 Speaker 2: if you know, if you had an Instagram or whatever. 406 00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:43,439 Speaker 2: If I had this person come out to you and 407 00:20:43,480 --> 00:20:44,720 Speaker 2: I was like, all right, I just want to see 408 00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:47,640 Speaker 2: and see what you do and you go forward with it, 409 00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:50,720 Speaker 2: there's my answer. I can't be with you, right because 410 00:20:50,720 --> 00:20:53,240 Speaker 2: some people just need to know, like will it happen again? 411 00:20:53,440 --> 00:20:57,720 Speaker 2: And to be able to control that, to know, like personally, 412 00:20:57,760 --> 00:21:00,480 Speaker 2: that's that it'd be easy to be like, Okay, I'm 413 00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:04,679 Speaker 2: done because you were that quick to like catch. 414 00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:07,520 Speaker 1: The bait, right, But if someone there's no been if 415 00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:10,200 Speaker 1: there's been no issues of infidelity in a relationship and 416 00:21:10,240 --> 00:21:10,960 Speaker 1: someone does that. 417 00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:13,000 Speaker 2: Then I don't think it's genius. I think that's you're 418 00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,960 Speaker 2: just playing with fire first of all, and it's rude. 419 00:21:16,240 --> 00:21:18,560 Speaker 1: Yeah, I would have a hard time honestly staying with 420 00:21:18,600 --> 00:21:21,639 Speaker 1: the person if they did that to me, Like that 421 00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:24,439 Speaker 1: would be like you said, it's so sneaky, It's like 422 00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:25,600 Speaker 1: why not just come talk to me? 423 00:21:26,840 --> 00:21:31,639 Speaker 2: Well, and I'm sorry, but you're gonna find like it's 424 00:21:31,680 --> 00:21:37,760 Speaker 2: it's not it's not smart, Like if they've not done 425 00:21:37,760 --> 00:21:40,119 Speaker 2: it before, you probably don't want to know if they would. 426 00:21:40,640 --> 00:21:45,719 Speaker 2: Like a very close friend of ours had her husband 427 00:21:45,760 --> 00:21:48,080 Speaker 2: was a sex addict, and she's like, I want to 428 00:21:48,119 --> 00:21:49,800 Speaker 2: know if he'll do it again, And so she had 429 00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:51,679 Speaker 2: created this like fake email and was like meet me 430 00:21:51,720 --> 00:21:55,680 Speaker 2: at this hotel and he bit and he showed up 431 00:21:55,720 --> 00:22:00,240 Speaker 2: and she she was there and yeah, and so was 432 00:22:00,320 --> 00:22:04,160 Speaker 2: like you're done, Like I can't do this with you anymore, 433 00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:07,680 Speaker 2: you know. So it's just one of those things. It's 434 00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:10,199 Speaker 2: like you just gotta be careful what you're what you're 435 00:22:10,600 --> 00:22:13,800 Speaker 2: putting out there, because most likely if the person's already 436 00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:15,119 Speaker 2: done it, they might bite again. 437 00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:18,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, sticky situation. 438 00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:22,960 Speaker 2: He's gonna find the bait regardless, I can't like, you know, yes, 439 00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:26,160 Speaker 2: I would like to have boundaries so that he won't 440 00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:27,680 Speaker 2: see a lot of bait. But at the end of 441 00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:29,320 Speaker 2: the day, if he wants bait, he's gonna go get bait. 442 00:22:30,880 --> 00:22:34,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I mean, both both are accurate. You don't 443 00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:36,879 Speaker 1: want to throw, you know, meet in the lion's cage, 444 00:22:36,920 --> 00:22:39,840 Speaker 1: and you also don't want to you know, and if 445 00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:41,959 Speaker 1: you really wanted to find it, then you'd go get it. 446 00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:46,680 Speaker 1: So both are both are definitely accurate. Let's take a break, 447 00:22:46,720 --> 00:22:48,040 Speaker 1: and then I want to touch on something we talked 448 00:22:48,160 --> 00:23:01,840 Speaker 1: on earlier. So we were talking Dancing with the Stars. Earlier, 449 00:23:02,200 --> 00:23:07,080 Speaker 1: we were talking about Artam and Nikki and they were 450 00:23:07,080 --> 00:23:12,480 Speaker 1: having a conversation. I think Artem's uh, I guess now 451 00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:18,560 Speaker 1: brother in law, Nicki's sister's husband was asking him about 452 00:23:18,880 --> 00:23:23,480 Speaker 1: sexter and pregnancy and he was saying, like, it felt 453 00:23:23,480 --> 00:23:26,680 Speaker 1: weird at first, and it is a mental thing and 454 00:23:28,520 --> 00:23:30,600 Speaker 1: you know, but then Nicky was saying, I mean, you 455 00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:32,439 Speaker 1: guys are dealing with this hormones, so you guys are 456 00:23:32,440 --> 00:23:35,119 Speaker 1: hornying and rowed up, and I want to have more sex. 457 00:23:35,160 --> 00:23:38,560 Speaker 1: And then guys, at first it is a mental thing. 458 00:23:39,640 --> 00:23:43,480 Speaker 1: It is a weird concept to get around like that. 459 00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:45,000 Speaker 1: You're you know your baby's in there. 460 00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:48,120 Speaker 2: You ain't poking them in the eye though, But. 461 00:23:48,119 --> 00:23:51,160 Speaker 1: Still I get what Artam's saying that it is weird 462 00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:54,280 Speaker 1: at first, Like you get over it, but it is 463 00:23:54,320 --> 00:23:55,040 Speaker 1: weird at first. 464 00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:58,919 Speaker 2: Why I felt the sexiest when I was pregnant. I 465 00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:04,159 Speaker 2: love like having hyperemesis and terrible pregnancies. I loved being pregnant. 466 00:24:04,480 --> 00:24:09,280 Speaker 1: I I empathize that. Of course y'all would take it 467 00:24:09,280 --> 00:24:11,560 Speaker 1: that way, take it personal and stuff, but it is you, 468 00:24:11,680 --> 00:24:14,639 Speaker 1: just you, just like Mark was saying, you're sharing that 469 00:24:14,680 --> 00:24:17,199 Speaker 1: canal and your baby's in there, and it's just But 470 00:24:17,320 --> 00:24:18,679 Speaker 1: once you get past it, you're past it. 471 00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:22,879 Speaker 2: So to the men out there that are you know, 472 00:24:23,080 --> 00:24:25,560 Speaker 2: to the wives, So don't take it personal. 473 00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:30,040 Speaker 1: Right, don't take it personal. Don't give up, like, just 474 00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:32,880 Speaker 1: stay with it, both of you, like you know, you'll 475 00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:35,359 Speaker 1: get there, you'll get to the comfort level and yeah, 476 00:24:35,760 --> 00:24:37,080 Speaker 1: but don't just take your time. 477 00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:41,800 Speaker 2: It'll be okay, and think about not your baby, not. 478 00:24:41,720 --> 00:24:43,160 Speaker 1: Poking your baby, not poking Jason. 479 00:24:44,440 --> 00:24:48,359 Speaker 3: And after after a couple of weeks, you're gonna be 480 00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:49,800 Speaker 3: ready and you're not gonna care as much. 481 00:24:52,760 --> 00:24:54,359 Speaker 2: What do you got for us? What's next? 482 00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:55,440 Speaker 1: We got any emails? Mark? 483 00:24:56,040 --> 00:24:58,840 Speaker 3: As a matter of fact, we do all right. This 484 00:24:58,880 --> 00:25:00,520 Speaker 3: is from Brittany. How do you go just feel about 485 00:25:00,560 --> 00:25:04,040 Speaker 3: your significant other looking at provocative photos of other women 486 00:25:04,240 --> 00:25:07,119 Speaker 3: or men, whether it's porn or just from Instagram or 487 00:25:07,119 --> 00:25:11,080 Speaker 3: websites like Chive that have these types of photos and gifts. 488 00:25:11,320 --> 00:25:13,760 Speaker 3: Does it make you feel insecure or take away from 489 00:25:13,760 --> 00:25:17,280 Speaker 3: your relationship at all? My boyfriend says every guy looks 490 00:25:17,320 --> 00:25:19,359 Speaker 3: at some form of this, and if he says he isn't, 491 00:25:19,359 --> 00:25:20,040 Speaker 3: then he's lying. 492 00:25:21,760 --> 00:25:22,800 Speaker 2: I'm not answering this. 493 00:25:24,280 --> 00:25:25,960 Speaker 3: I think she wants your perspective on it. 494 00:25:27,840 --> 00:25:32,679 Speaker 1: So I was ignorant like this boyfriend in my younger 495 00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:35,960 Speaker 1: years and thought it was normal, and thought every guy 496 00:25:36,000 --> 00:25:37,800 Speaker 1: looked at this kind of stuff. And I did. And 497 00:25:37,920 --> 00:25:40,560 Speaker 1: you know, Jane and Hiatus ues even in the past 498 00:25:40,560 --> 00:25:43,400 Speaker 1: four years of that kind of behavior coming back up, 499 00:25:44,680 --> 00:25:49,439 Speaker 1: and it took, you know, I had to change my 500 00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:53,800 Speaker 1: mindset around it because before, you know, before I was 501 00:25:53,840 --> 00:25:55,840 Speaker 1: in a twelve step program for addiction and all that, 502 00:25:55,920 --> 00:25:58,600 Speaker 1: and I just kind of wrote it off as guy 503 00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:00,520 Speaker 1: doing guy stuff, a big deal. 504 00:26:01,560 --> 00:26:01,919 Speaker 3: You know what. 505 00:26:02,160 --> 00:26:04,720 Speaker 1: Some guys are able to do that, and that's fine. 506 00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:08,560 Speaker 1: Some guys, some relationships can, some women can. Some guys can, 507 00:26:08,880 --> 00:26:12,639 Speaker 1: and it doesn't take anything from their relationship. And that's fine. 508 00:26:12,920 --> 00:26:17,280 Speaker 1: For me, learning the hard way multiple times, it did 509 00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:20,199 Speaker 1: take away from my relationship. It took away from my 510 00:26:20,280 --> 00:26:24,360 Speaker 1: connection with Janna. It and it just you know, and 511 00:26:24,440 --> 00:26:29,359 Speaker 1: I was finally able to realize and empathize that objectifying 512 00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:33,919 Speaker 1: another woman is harmful not only to my relationship, but 513 00:26:34,200 --> 00:26:37,920 Speaker 1: it's disrespectful to Janna, you know. And that's the way 514 00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:40,680 Speaker 1: I look at it now. Now Brittany needs to come 515 00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:47,280 Speaker 1: to him in an approachable way and be you know, 516 00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:52,000 Speaker 1: open to things and having a discussion and just sharing 517 00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:54,520 Speaker 1: her heart with him and sharing how she feels about 518 00:26:54,520 --> 00:26:58,200 Speaker 1: it and you know, sharing that make up that the 519 00:26:58,280 --> 00:27:01,160 Speaker 1: way she takes it is like he's using the other 520 00:27:01,560 --> 00:27:02,480 Speaker 1: things over her. 521 00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:05,960 Speaker 2: And in the end, Brittany, like you'll find someone that 522 00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:10,480 Speaker 2: won't put importance in that or care. Yeah, they'll care 523 00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:12,600 Speaker 2: more about you and be like, oh my god, I'm 524 00:27:12,640 --> 00:27:14,040 Speaker 2: so sorry. Yeah, Like I don't need to look at this. 525 00:27:15,080 --> 00:27:18,040 Speaker 3: Next email, Jessica says, my boyfriend and I have been 526 00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:19,959 Speaker 3: together for two and a half years, and hasn't been 527 00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:21,440 Speaker 3: a perfect fairy tale. 528 00:27:21,400 --> 00:27:22,240 Speaker 1: To say the least. 529 00:27:22,680 --> 00:27:24,879 Speaker 3: This week, I find out that he cheated early in 530 00:27:24,880 --> 00:27:27,359 Speaker 3: our relationship, sometime within the first year of his dating. 531 00:27:27,680 --> 00:27:30,600 Speaker 3: He refused to tell me if it was once or 532 00:27:30,640 --> 00:27:34,240 Speaker 3: more than once, or what he did or what exactly happened. 533 00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:36,880 Speaker 3: He swears that for the past year since we started 534 00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:40,439 Speaker 3: living together, he has been totally faithful. Where do we 535 00:27:40,480 --> 00:27:41,160 Speaker 3: go from here? 536 00:27:42,720 --> 00:27:45,719 Speaker 2: That's so tough because you're going to feel like the 537 00:27:45,840 --> 00:27:51,840 Speaker 2: entire last few years are a lie. And I mean, 538 00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:55,919 Speaker 2: first advice is just going to therapy, and I think 539 00:27:56,080 --> 00:27:58,080 Speaker 2: you know, if he told you, or if you found 540 00:27:58,119 --> 00:28:02,880 Speaker 2: out and he didn't tell you, I think I think 541 00:28:02,920 --> 00:28:05,960 Speaker 2: he needs to be honest and come forward and say 542 00:28:06,080 --> 00:28:08,880 Speaker 2: you know how many so you have the full knowledge 543 00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:15,199 Speaker 2: before you step forward together. Because if he doesn't, you know, 544 00:28:15,359 --> 00:28:18,159 Speaker 2: since he didn't come forth and be a man and 545 00:28:18,200 --> 00:28:21,400 Speaker 2: tell you up front, then you know and you found 546 00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:24,800 Speaker 2: this out, well, I think it's important to if he 547 00:28:24,880 --> 00:28:28,560 Speaker 2: really cares and values the relationship, he should now be 548 00:28:28,720 --> 00:28:32,280 Speaker 2: honest about what it was, because then you have the 549 00:28:32,320 --> 00:28:36,920 Speaker 2: full knowledge and the full facts before you can make 550 00:28:36,920 --> 00:28:39,760 Speaker 2: your decision on if it's something you can move forward 551 00:28:39,760 --> 00:28:42,320 Speaker 2: with or not, because what if it was like ten 552 00:28:42,400 --> 00:28:45,080 Speaker 2: something girls or whatever, like you need to know if 553 00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:48,000 Speaker 2: it was just one time versus it's there is different 554 00:28:48,160 --> 00:28:50,440 Speaker 2: there are and I always say it's not different. There's 555 00:28:50,440 --> 00:28:53,000 Speaker 2: times that I'm like, oh, you know, it's one time 556 00:28:53,080 --> 00:28:55,640 Speaker 2: or thirty like what. But it's silly, like you need 557 00:28:55,680 --> 00:28:57,760 Speaker 2: to know the facts and have it sit where you 558 00:28:57,760 --> 00:28:58,880 Speaker 2: feel like it would sit for you. 559 00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:05,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, And unfortunately, Jessica, you know the fact that you 560 00:29:05,960 --> 00:29:12,960 Speaker 1: had to find out. Chances are this isn't one hundred percent. 561 00:29:13,720 --> 00:29:20,480 Speaker 1: Chances are he is minimizing the past, minimizing what happened 562 00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:26,720 Speaker 1: so he can brush it under the rug and move forward. 563 00:29:27,680 --> 00:29:32,120 Speaker 1: Because as someone who's been that my entire life, that 564 00:29:32,280 --> 00:29:38,760 Speaker 1: is what I did every single time, minimized, rationalized, justified, 565 00:29:39,040 --> 00:29:43,960 Speaker 1: and compartmentalized and then try to move on. So that's 566 00:29:44,240 --> 00:29:47,040 Speaker 1: probably what he's doing again, not for certain, I don't 567 00:29:47,040 --> 00:29:49,920 Speaker 1: want you to hold that against him from Jump Street, 568 00:29:50,840 --> 00:29:56,959 Speaker 1: but I think Janna is right. You know, it's up 569 00:29:57,000 --> 00:30:03,440 Speaker 1: to you whether the number amount or what happened is 570 00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:06,080 Speaker 1: a variable in the equation, because yet therapists will tell 571 00:30:06,080 --> 00:30:08,320 Speaker 1: you later down the road whether it's one or a hundred, 572 00:30:08,360 --> 00:30:12,880 Speaker 1: Like the betrayal is still there regardless, so that the 573 00:30:13,160 --> 00:30:16,640 Speaker 1: big picture of that is still there. But it is different, 574 00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:20,560 Speaker 1: not to justify a drunken mistake, but if it was 575 00:30:20,600 --> 00:30:22,880 Speaker 1: this one time thing that he regrets and he's never 576 00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:25,200 Speaker 1: had communication with him and he hasn't done it since, 577 00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:29,440 Speaker 1: that is different than, like Jana said, being with ten 578 00:30:29,480 --> 00:30:32,120 Speaker 1: other women or being with someone on a regular basis. 579 00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:34,760 Speaker 1: So try to find. 580 00:30:34,600 --> 00:30:37,840 Speaker 2: Out the facts because you're entitled to him. 581 00:30:37,960 --> 00:30:39,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, you are entitled to him. 582 00:30:39,800 --> 00:30:44,120 Speaker 2: Now, don't ask for all the facts. There's certainly I 583 00:30:44,160 --> 00:30:47,200 Speaker 2: was going to say, find the number and find you 584 00:30:47,240 --> 00:30:51,560 Speaker 2: know when and that's when and how many? Is really 585 00:30:51,680 --> 00:30:53,920 Speaker 2: only the details that anyone needs to know, because trust me, 586 00:30:53,960 --> 00:30:55,520 Speaker 2: there's so many things I wish I could burn out 587 00:30:55,560 --> 00:30:56,680 Speaker 2: of my memory for asking. 588 00:30:56,920 --> 00:30:59,800 Speaker 1: Yeah, you're hurt. Your pain is going to want you 589 00:30:59,840 --> 00:31:02,040 Speaker 1: to ask every question of the sun, and you're not 590 00:31:02,040 --> 00:31:03,600 Speaker 1: gonna want to know the answers to everything. 591 00:31:04,600 --> 00:31:05,040 Speaker 2: Agreed. 592 00:31:06,800 --> 00:31:11,240 Speaker 1: It's always tough. Yeah, it's always tough. And the end 593 00:31:11,320 --> 00:31:13,760 Speaker 1: of the day, we just we empathize with you, Jessica 594 00:31:13,800 --> 00:31:15,520 Speaker 1: and sorry that you have to be going through this, 595 00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:19,960 Speaker 1: but yeah, it's it's your decision and we know it's 596 00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:21,840 Speaker 1: it's hard to know where to go from here. 597 00:31:23,600 --> 00:31:26,240 Speaker 2: Well, on a side note, Michael and I get to 598 00:31:26,240 --> 00:31:32,800 Speaker 2: go do couples therapy now. So here's to good times ahead. 599 00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:34,840 Speaker 1: It's gonna be a great. 600 00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:37,480 Speaker 3: Credit for get credit for time served after this hour. 601 00:31:37,760 --> 00:31:41,200 Speaker 2: Right, that's what we talked about. All the fluff on here. 602 00:31:41,320 --> 00:31:43,480 Speaker 2: Now we're gonna get to the good stuff. Mark, And 603 00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:46,640 Speaker 2: you can't be anywhere insight, oh man. 604 00:31:46,760 --> 00:31:50,080 Speaker 1: Mark can't produce our couples therapy sessions. See this is 605 00:31:50,120 --> 00:31:53,440 Speaker 1: where I get. I get fearful because I'm going into 606 00:31:53,440 --> 00:31:56,480 Speaker 1: the session, like, man, we've actually been pretty good. I 607 00:31:56,520 --> 00:31:58,440 Speaker 1: don't really have anything on the top of my plate. 608 00:31:58,920 --> 00:32:02,920 Speaker 1: And then we go in and I did blind decided 609 00:32:02,960 --> 00:32:03,800 Speaker 1: by a mac truck. 610 00:32:05,880 --> 00:32:08,520 Speaker 2: That was like the last week, Like last week, you 611 00:32:08,600 --> 00:32:10,320 Speaker 2: like got on me about something which I can't remember 612 00:32:10,400 --> 00:32:13,240 Speaker 2: now what it was, but I was like, I thought 613 00:32:13,240 --> 00:32:19,400 Speaker 2: we were good. Do you remember what that was about? 614 00:32:19,800 --> 00:32:22,040 Speaker 2: Like something so out of the blue where I was like, 615 00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:26,760 Speaker 2: what I thought we were good? You had some complaint 616 00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:30,880 Speaker 2: about me, and it was just it was seemed so big. 617 00:32:31,120 --> 00:32:32,960 Speaker 2: And then I was just like I it's like like you. 618 00:32:33,040 --> 00:32:34,840 Speaker 2: I was like I thought we were good, like we 619 00:32:34,880 --> 00:32:37,360 Speaker 2: haven't fought, Like, do you remember what it was? 620 00:32:37,800 --> 00:32:39,560 Speaker 1: Is it when I felt taken advantage of? 621 00:32:39,800 --> 00:32:44,400 Speaker 2: No, it was after that, it was something else. 622 00:32:44,640 --> 00:32:45,360 Speaker 1: I don't remember. 623 00:32:45,640 --> 00:32:47,920 Speaker 2: Wow, See, isn't that crazy. It was because we got 624 00:32:48,000 --> 00:32:49,960 Speaker 2: into it because I got really defensive about it, which 625 00:32:50,200 --> 00:32:52,400 Speaker 2: my work was bad because I was like, I got 626 00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:56,520 Speaker 2: really frustrated because I was like, where is this coming from? 627 00:32:56,840 --> 00:32:58,880 Speaker 1: And I wasn't. I wasn't even trying to like make 628 00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:00,800 Speaker 1: a big deal about it. I was just expressing what 629 00:33:00,880 --> 00:33:03,440 Speaker 1: was coming up. I don't remember. It's not so funny 630 00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:06,680 Speaker 1: that we forget. Yeah, I mean, thank you. 631 00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:10,000 Speaker 2: What's our email mark? Because I really would love more 632 00:33:10,000 --> 00:33:11,000 Speaker 2: people to email us. 633 00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:18,080 Speaker 3: It's a great question. Wind down at iHeartRadio dot com. 634 00:33:18,120 --> 00:33:21,160 Speaker 2: Wind down at iHeartRadio dot com. You guys email us. 635 00:33:21,200 --> 00:33:24,320 Speaker 2: We'd love to talk about other people's stuff. 636 00:33:24,400 --> 00:33:28,000 Speaker 1: Yeah. I love to talk about your your in a 637 00:33:28,000 --> 00:33:30,600 Speaker 1: good way because we all have some we all deal 638 00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:34,320 Speaker 1: with it and we have different ways of going about it. 639 00:33:36,080 --> 00:33:36,720 Speaker 2: I love you guys. 640 00:33:37,120 --> 00:33:39,640 Speaker 1: Have a nice fight, have a good fight.