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Speaker 1: Hey guys, So we are so excited to wind down today. Um,

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Speaker 1: we have a great show. We have a great show,

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Speaker 1: and we have the whole family in here. We on Sunday.

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Speaker 1: We came in on a Sunday, so we had recorded

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Speaker 1: the show when it was a Babe last last Thursday

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Speaker 1: or Friday. Yeah, it was last Friday, and we had

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Speaker 1: posted a photo on my Instagram feed and it was

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Speaker 1: just a cute photo of us being like, hey, we're

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Speaker 1: back to work and matching in our Jeane jackets. And

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Speaker 1: then all of a sudden, no, it wasn't actually all

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Speaker 1: of a sudden, we go home and then you know,

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Speaker 1: I'm unfortunately I look at my comments and sometimes people

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Speaker 1: can be really mean, and usually I ignore it, but

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Speaker 1: I was so and I remember I came to you

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Speaker 1: and I go because you said what's wrong? And I

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Speaker 1: looked kind of sad and said, people are body shaming

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Speaker 1: me on my Instagram. That photo, he's like, which thought

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Speaker 1: I was like, the photo of us back to work,

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Speaker 1: and you're like and and so I started to get

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Speaker 1: really upset because I was reading this comment, especially from

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Speaker 1: this one lady. I'm not going to mention her name,

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Speaker 1: so I don't want to give any more attention than

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Speaker 1: she's already gotten. But she basically was saying a few things. Um.

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Speaker 1: I looked at that. I that I had a tummy talk.

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Speaker 1: She's like, well, that's what happens when you're a celebrity

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Speaker 1: and you could have a tummy talk. Um. What else

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Speaker 1: did she say? Well, that's what happens when you have

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Speaker 1: fortunes and you could have a private chef. Um that

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Speaker 1: I faked my pregnancy that Um what else that was?

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Speaker 1: That was too thin? Because you have money, you can

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Speaker 1: afford a trainer. Yeah, I can afford a trainer every

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Speaker 1: single day. Um. And that basically I was I was

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Speaker 1: too small post baby, and I was like, I'm getting

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Speaker 1: body shame for being too small. It's like if I

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Speaker 1: would have posted so anyways, Then after that, I started

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Speaker 1: to defend myself in the comments, and so I thought, well,

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Speaker 1: we need to defend ourselves on this this platform. Yeah, absolutely,

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Speaker 1: and you did. You did a great job in expressing

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Speaker 1: yourself in your post following well, and I had I

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Speaker 1: wanted to post a photo of the full image, and

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Speaker 1: I'm so glad that I didn't. I mean, I ended

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Speaker 1: up showing a photo in my stories of the full

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Speaker 1: image because you know, my my girlfriend Sarah Bryce was like,

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Speaker 1: you know what, let's start a movement, whether it's you know,

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Speaker 1: postpartum is beautiful, whether you recover fast or you don't,

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Speaker 1: you know, don't recover as fast. And so I but

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Speaker 1: I cropped the photo at first because it's like, I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna get shamed for being too small, too big. It's

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Speaker 1: like everybody's bodies are different. Why am I getting shamed

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Speaker 1: for for bouncing back quicker? You know? I think I

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Speaker 1: think the most infuriating part of all of that is, Okay,

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Speaker 1: if people want to comment about someone else's body whatever,

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Speaker 1: people are always going to do that. But the fact

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Speaker 1: that she wants to stereo type and jump to conclusions

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Speaker 1: that you have a private chef, you work with a

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Speaker 1: trainer every day, you had a tummy tuck, and all

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Speaker 1: these outrageous things. Yeah, you have a chef. His name

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Speaker 1: is your husband. Me. When I'm not cooking, you're cooking,

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Speaker 1: or it's Postmates or yeah, or we're fortunate to get

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Speaker 1: Hello Fresh every now and then. But we cook and

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Speaker 1: you work out with the trainer, yes, when you can.

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Speaker 1: Well that's the thing too. I was like, man, I

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Speaker 1: started to think back on how many times actually worked

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Speaker 1: out with Aaron. It was maybe once a week maybe. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: And the thing is too, it's like, because you took

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Speaker 1: care of yourself during your pregnancy, you didn't just sit

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Speaker 1: on your ass and just you know, feel sorry for

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Speaker 1: yourself or anything. And some people during their pregnancy they

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Speaker 1: can't physically do anything, and that's okay, but you had

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Speaker 1: the energy you had, you have the determination to get

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Speaker 1: up and do something, and you want to bounce back

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Speaker 1: quick afterwards. That's why you work your ass off, You

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Speaker 1: eat great, you work out and all that stuff during

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Speaker 1: your pregnancy, and you reap the benefits afterwards. Again not

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Speaker 1: saying that everyone has to do that, because some people

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Speaker 1: physically can't. Just like you in the first trime, master

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Speaker 1: you physically bear, they could get out of bed. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and there's our baby. So yeah, there is a family

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Speaker 1: affair in here today because we're all upset about this,

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Speaker 1: and just leave my wife alone, leave people alone. And

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Speaker 1: it's not even about like sitting on your butt, because

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Speaker 1: it's just you know, Mama Training always said, she's like,

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Speaker 1: you have an excuse to be able to eat whatever

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Speaker 1: you want because you're gonna get big. But with this pregnancy,

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Speaker 1: I ate so much different than Jolie. With Jolie, I

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Speaker 1: had pasta and and and um potatoes because that's what

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Speaker 1: I craved. I didn't crave any of that when I

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Speaker 1: was pregnant with Jayce. All I wanted was salads. So,

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Speaker 1: you know, it's you're just getting shamed for working hard,

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Speaker 1: which is so ridiculous, Which is just the whole thing

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Speaker 1: about people on on social media and all that they

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Speaker 1: want to hate on people and everything. Guess what, I

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Speaker 1: guarantee people that hate on other people aren't successful in

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Speaker 1: their life and they wait for things to come to

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Speaker 1: them when hard work is how you get things done,

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Speaker 1: whether it be successful in your career and your personal life,

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Speaker 1: with your body, whatever it is. You're getting really heated round. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: because I wanted to defend you, because this is it's

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Speaker 1: bs that someone attacks you like that when they don't

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Speaker 1: know at all how hard you work every single day

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Speaker 1: and how hard you did work during your pregnancy. So

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Speaker 1: it's unbelievable that people have the audacity to say these

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Speaker 1: kind of things. I know, Jolie, I agree with you, honey.

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Speaker 1: It's it's crazy. You know. It infuriates me though, is

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Speaker 1: that people think we're just like loaded for first of all,

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Speaker 1: there it's like if I, first of all, we don't

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Speaker 1: have enough money to get a tummy talk, even if

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Speaker 1: I want to tummy. I'm not saying we're you know,

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Speaker 1: we're you know, we're we're we're comfortable, but we also

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Speaker 1: che and we're comfortable. Yeah, but we also don't know

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Speaker 1: what next year is gonna hold. You know, nothing in

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Speaker 1: our businesses is guaranteed. I don't know if I'm going

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Speaker 1: to ever book a movie again, our TV show, or

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Speaker 1: if if my music you know, people will buy it,

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Speaker 1: or it's this podcast is gonna I don't. We don't know,

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Speaker 1: so we have to really we can't do extravagant things

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Speaker 1: and people think even sweet are are you know Michelle

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Speaker 1: who helps with Jolie, she was. I laughed at the

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Speaker 1: comments about the personal shop. People think that you have

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Speaker 1: all this money, and it's like it's again, it's another

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Speaker 1: stereotype where you know, when I was playing in the NFL,

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Speaker 1: people just that don't know, automatically think you have millions

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Speaker 1: of dollars. We're living in a square foot house right

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Speaker 1: now in Los Angeles. It's not it doesn't look like that,

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Speaker 1: like just because you're an entertainment and I would play football,

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Speaker 1: and now we're doing this. It's like, doesn't mean just

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Speaker 1: money just falls off the trees. Remember that, everybody else?

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Speaker 1: Remember that one comment we got on Instagram, They go, Wow,

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Speaker 1: your house is so dot dot dot normal. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: what is it supposed to look? Yeah? Again, people have

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Speaker 1: these perceptions. Not granted, we go back to Nashville, our

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Speaker 1: house will be a lot. Well, it's because it's the

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Speaker 1: Nashville and but again it's more affordable there. Yeah, and

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Speaker 1: which is why we're moving to Nashville's because we can't

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Speaker 1: afford a house that we need in l A. So

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Speaker 1: that's why we're moving. We don't have the money to

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Speaker 1: have a personal shop. It's so ridiculous that people just

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Speaker 1: jumped to these conclusions. And it's just like why, Like, again,

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Speaker 1: haters are gonna hate, They're gonna say the things, and

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Speaker 1: most of the time it is because they're miserable in

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Speaker 1: their life. Come your honey, Joey is having a mess.

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Speaker 1: I just that's okay, honey, we're all upset. I just

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Speaker 1: wish that women would support each other's bodies. Oh geez, Louis,

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Speaker 1: can you headphones? You want your headphones? You want? You

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Speaker 1: want your headphones? Okay? You want to tissue? Do you

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Speaker 1: want to starburst? That'll keep her quiet? You want your candy? Okay,

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Speaker 1: you want I'm doing you a game. I just wish

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Speaker 1: that women would support each other and not body shame,

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Speaker 1: whether you're too thin, too big, too whatever, or it's like, man,

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Speaker 1: you've been you look this way ten months postpartum or

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Speaker 1: one week postpartum, how dare you look too good? Well,

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Speaker 1: my friend Katherine, she goes, how dare you look too

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Speaker 1: thin after giving a birth? How dare you look too

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Speaker 1: fat after giving birth? It's like you can't win, No,

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Speaker 1: you can't. And it's just it's unfortunately, it's just women

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Speaker 1: that shame like that, that body shame. You don't think

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Speaker 1: guys do not each other? No, you don't think so

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Speaker 1: at all. Guys don't body shame each other. And why

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Speaker 1: is that? I don't think the how a man's physical appearance. Unfortunately,

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Speaker 1: for women, it's there's more of a pedestal on how

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Speaker 1: you guys are supposed to look, where men there's not.

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Speaker 1: There's not a stigma like there is for women. And

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Speaker 1: that's just generations and generations of how society has been

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Speaker 1: and perceived men versus women. So men don't body shame

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Speaker 1: each other. I really don't. I sometimes have body envy,

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Speaker 1: Like I look at you know, Lauren Bush now and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, God, you're so thin and you're so fit.

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Speaker 1: I wish I looked like that. But then I'm like,

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Speaker 1: can I give myself a little grace? I just had

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Speaker 1: a baby, even though I look in the mirror and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, this is not how I look before

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Speaker 1: a baby. So it's so I get depressed. I have

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Speaker 1: my hormones going through my body, but at the same time,

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Speaker 1: what I just went through is a beautiful thing. I'm

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Speaker 1: a mother of two. My body is not going to

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Speaker 1: most likely look like that, and right, but I mean,

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Speaker 1: I've always kind of had a little bit of a

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Speaker 1: you know, a pooch in my opinion, and so but

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Speaker 1: I'm but I'm just saying, like it's it's you know,

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Speaker 1: I do have sometimes have body envy, but I would

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Speaker 1: never shame someone for looking a certain way, you know.

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Speaker 1: It's just it's really sad that women do that. And

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Speaker 1: I just really hope that women can just have grace

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Speaker 1: for yourself. You're not going to look the same as

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Speaker 1: somebody else, and that's what makes us beautiful and different

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Speaker 1: in our own personal ways. Absolutely, and that's okay. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: people are seeing to calm the ft down Onto wind Down,

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Speaker 1: wind Down with j Kramer and I Heart Radio podcast.

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Speaker 1: We're out of the house. I mean, I just feel

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Speaker 1: so relieved sitting in the studio again. It feels like

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Speaker 1: it's been an eternity since we've been in here, I know,

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Speaker 1: And it just feels so nice to just like this morning,

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Speaker 1: I put on some makeup, I put some clothes on,

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Speaker 1: I put on deodorant, I got out, I breathed. How

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Speaker 1: did I say that, I breathed in the fresh air. No?

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Speaker 1: Is that it works? Breathe breathed. It doesn't sound right,

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Speaker 1: doesn't sound right at all. I breathed in the fresh air,

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Speaker 1: breathed in fresh air. No, but it was so like

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Speaker 1: I felt like I was skipping out of the house.

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Speaker 1: Not but I obviously I am so sad to leave

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Speaker 1: Jason Jolly home. But at the same time, we haven't

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Speaker 1: we haven't left the house in a week. Yeah. Well

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Speaker 1: actually and was just to run out and get something

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Speaker 1: real quick, but were out of the house. I haven't

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Speaker 1: been out of the house, yeah, because I've had to

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Speaker 1: take joulders because I was recovering for my c section, which,

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Speaker 1: by the way, I just have to say, it barely

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Speaker 1: looks like you're pregnant, Like you're ever pregnant. The studio's

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Speaker 1: ghost down today. But I was counting on a bunch

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Speaker 1: of people saying that to you, because that's what everyone

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Speaker 1: we say. It's like, I can't believe you just had

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Speaker 1: a baby. Oh my gosh, Well I feel like I

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Speaker 1: just had a baby, and my stomach still feels incredibly

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Speaker 1: cut up, like I just had a baby. Well, you

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Speaker 1: look amazing. Thanks by um. I just have to say

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Speaker 1: thank you to every single one of the wine Down

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Speaker 1: listeners for being so incredibly supportive about our last podcast

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Speaker 1: episode when we well, I've recorded the birth of Jace. I,

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Speaker 1: Michael and I were listening to it in bed that

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Speaker 1: day and I made you turn it off. You're embarrassed.

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Speaker 1: I started crying. I was so embarrassed. I was like,

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Speaker 1: I knew that we were obviously doing a live podcast,

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Speaker 1: but I didn't know that we were keeping everything in Easton.

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Speaker 1: I didn't know you were keeping in me like vomiting.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I was vomiting on the table that's that's

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Speaker 1: visceral stuff. I like, was there, right, But then I'm

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Speaker 1: like when I was going no, no, no, no, Jane, Jane, Jane,

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Speaker 1: No no No, I'm like, oh my god, I'm so embarrassed.

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Speaker 1: You know how many people probably feel so much more

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Speaker 1: comfortable now with their experience or going into their experience

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Speaker 1: because they know someone like you has been so open

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Speaker 1: and vocal and vulnerable about all this. Knowing that stars

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Speaker 1: they're just like no. But I literally made Michael turn

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Speaker 1: it off. I started bawling my eyes out, and I

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Speaker 1: was like, I'm so embarrassed. Everyone's gonna think I'm crazy,

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Speaker 1: and I just have to say I have just been

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Speaker 1: blown away by the support, and selfishly, I don't feel

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Speaker 1: as crazy now because a lot of other moms had

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Speaker 1: the same issue as friends of yours that you didn't

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Speaker 1: even you didn't even know how to kind of experiences. Yeah, like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I you know, I didn't feel anything up to my

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Speaker 1: throat or I was puking too, And I'm like, really, like,

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Speaker 1: so I again, I just said like ten times, so

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna stop that. But I just I'm so grateful

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Speaker 1: and I just can't thank you guys enough for making

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Speaker 1: me feel a little less crazy and making me feel

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Speaker 1: like I didn't look at that. I don't have to

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Speaker 1: be embarrassed. I'm not going to listen to it. I'm

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Speaker 1: not going to finish those things to it. But because

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Speaker 1: I remember it very vividly, I don't want to have

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Speaker 1: to relive it. Yeah, I know. So I'm not thinking

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Speaker 1: I'm proud of you. I know a lot of people

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Speaker 1: are proud of you. And I mean that takes a

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Speaker 1: lot of a lot of ways, a lot of lady

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Speaker 1: balls to put yourself out there like that. So you

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Speaker 1: did amazing. Can we just say, real fast though, how

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Speaker 1: it was my idea to do the sweet messages to

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Speaker 1: each other? Yeah, let's talk about this. Well, no, because

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Speaker 1: I just feel like so it was my idea. I

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Speaker 1: was like, hey, babe, I think we should I think

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Speaker 1: we should say like sweet notes to each other, like

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Speaker 1: right before. But when we separate and I go into

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Speaker 1: the operating room, we leave a message for each other.

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Speaker 1: And so Michael gets all the credit because he left

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Speaker 1: me the sweetest voice memo and I had no idea

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Speaker 1: that I was when we separated, that I was going

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Speaker 1: straight into the O R room. So I just trying

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Speaker 1: to say face right now and say that it was

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Speaker 1: her idea because I was just extremely thoughtful and super sweet. Crap.

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Speaker 1: I'll try. I don't just do my bunder here, honey,

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Speaker 1: he goes, well, I don't care. It makes me look better.

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Speaker 1: Right before the episode, before we listened to it, I

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Speaker 1: go obey. By the way, I didn't have a chance

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Speaker 1: to say, you know, thank you to Michael for being

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Speaker 1: but I'll do it right now. Michael, I just want

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Speaker 1: to say thank you so much for being the fast

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Speaker 1: nine months. You've been incredible and I'm so proud of

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Speaker 1: you and i just can't wait to have this baby boy.

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Speaker 1: There go, thanks so powerful. Yeah, so um that happened.

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Speaker 1: But again, I just can't thank you guys enough. I

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Speaker 1: don't feel as crazy, and I'm just really glad that,

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Speaker 1: um we did that. I am glad we did that.

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Speaker 1: But I'm also glad that we have Amazon Fire TV, yeah,

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Speaker 1: because we've been inside all the time. Yeah. And with

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Speaker 1: watching we can watch movies, TV, YouTube, I mean anything

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Speaker 1: we want from Netflix to Prime Video, Hulu. I mean, Michael,

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Speaker 1: you can even stay up while you have Ja's for

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Speaker 1: the nighttime feeding and you can do you can watch

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Speaker 1: a makeup tutorial. I'll pass on that, but I haven't

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Speaker 1: catching up on my shows on Netflix while I'm up

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Speaker 1: with our child. But it's so great though, I mean

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Speaker 1: it's it's it's easy as saying, hey, Alexa, open YouTube.

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Speaker 1: So it's incredible. Um, head to Amazon dot com slash

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Speaker 1: wind down again. That's Amazon dot Com slash wind down

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Speaker 1: to order a fire TV of your very owned and

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Speaker 1: they make really great gifts too for the holiday season.

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Speaker 1: I was thinking, yeah, maybe for your brother. I like

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Speaker 1: the work. So we have two really really great guests today.

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Speaker 1: I'm really excited because one was the original Power Ranger,

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Speaker 1: which you kind of wanna. That was in our notes

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Speaker 1: that she was the original Power Ranger. But you you

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Speaker 1: you're calling not she was on Power Rangers like Lost Galaxy,

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Speaker 1: which is awesome Nerds like you guys are the biggest

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Speaker 1: nerds ever, Like, that's not the original Power Ranger. I'm

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Speaker 1: just saying, if you're going to use the word original, original,

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Speaker 1: was like, but she's original, She's still a Power Ranger.

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Speaker 1: You want her to show you the moves. I want

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Speaker 1: to know how she did them all? Did she do

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Speaker 1: her own stunts? Yeah? How much martial arts? Did she learn.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I have no idea. Hey, do we want

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Speaker 1: to talk about that. We've had your parents in town

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Speaker 1: for the last week. I'm sure it's been awesome. It

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Speaker 1: hasn't been able to sleep. It's so funny though, how

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Speaker 1: some people want guests after babies and some people don't.

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Speaker 1: You know, yeah, there, Yeah, it's two different mentalities. I know.

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Speaker 1: I'm very curious how people handle because sometimes you know,

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Speaker 1: in laws can be overbearing, parents can be overbearing in general.

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Speaker 1: But I think it's been great though. They've been really good,

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Speaker 1: are very helpful. Yeah, it's so much so that now

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Speaker 1: we're like, my mom's gone, my dad already left, my

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Speaker 1: mom's gone, and now it's like, wait, we don't have

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Speaker 1: a third person to help pop out, Like what do

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Speaker 1: we do now? What's the best thing about having jays

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Speaker 1: a son? Right now? Oh? Man? I think you know,

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Speaker 1: I've said this numerous times to you and to other

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Speaker 1: people that have asked me. I feel like there's something

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Speaker 1: to be said for when you have a child that

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Speaker 1: is the same sex as you. There's a little bit

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Speaker 1: more initial connection, there's you know, there's I feel like

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Speaker 1: there's a little bit more responsibility. So I think just

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Speaker 1: like I told you the other night when you're like,

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Speaker 1: why don't I come get you in the middle of night,

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Speaker 1: because I was like, I even though he was like

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Speaker 1: five days old, I felt like we were bonding, you know,

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Speaker 1: and that's just super cool to have that feeling already,

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Speaker 1: let alone when he can actually interact with me and

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Speaker 1: do those things. So I don't know, I just think

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Speaker 1: it's it's just cool. It's just feeling said I didn't

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Speaker 1: have with Jolie. Not to take away from Jolie, because

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Speaker 1: I love her just as much, but it's just there's

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Speaker 1: something about it. Yeah. I told Michael in the hospital.

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Speaker 1: I was just sitting in the hospital bed and I

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Speaker 1: saw Michael holding Jason. I said, not taking anything away

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Speaker 1: from Jolie, you were great, But I said, but you

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Speaker 1: are so much different with this, with this birth. I

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Speaker 1: don't I I think some of it's because you're in

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Speaker 1: a better place and you're healthier, but I also think

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Speaker 1: you just have, like you said, that connection, not that

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Speaker 1: you didn't have the connection with Jolie, but you're just

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Speaker 1: so much more present and that helps you better with

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Speaker 1: maybe the connection. Yeah, there's no question. I mean, it's

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Speaker 1: you know, I don't know what percentages what how much

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Speaker 1: of it is just my mental health and where I'm

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Speaker 1: at now and my life is a way better than

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Speaker 1: where it was when Jolie was born, fortunately and unfortunately.

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Speaker 1: Um but so I think it's it's a mix of too.

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Speaker 1: It's I'm I'm in a better place now and also

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Speaker 1: because he's my little boy and there's just an immediate

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Speaker 1: connection as opposed to Jolie, where it's like, yes there's

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Speaker 1: a connection, but it's my daughter as opposed to myself.

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Speaker 1: You know, I'm not saying putting one above the other

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Speaker 1: at all, And it's just I think anyone who has

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Speaker 1: multiple children and of different sexes, I think they can

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Speaker 1: probably relate. It's funny. I want to talk to the

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Speaker 1: We have a therapist calling into Dr Dale Saltz. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and I'm curious to see if i'd like, I'd love

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Speaker 1: to talk to you about the postpartum depression and and

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Speaker 1: what's kind of normal and then what's just like your

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Speaker 1: hormones balancing back, because even just after the after the birth,

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Speaker 1: I mean obviously I've been crying at the randomest things,

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Speaker 1: like you cut that lemon perfectly, Like I mean crying

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Speaker 1: from that too, you know, am I depressed it, you know,

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Speaker 1: do I feel depressed? Do I have this the same connection?

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Speaker 1: Because I think, you know, I had obviously such a

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Speaker 1: huge connection with with Jolie, and then when I had Jason,

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Speaker 1: again not saying I didn't have that connection, but it

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Speaker 1: was just from surgery and all the medicines. And then

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Speaker 1: you start to compare, like, is this the exact same

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Speaker 1: how I felt with Jolie? Oh my gosh, is it less?

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Speaker 1: Oh no, do I not have a connection? And you

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Speaker 1: start to freak yourself out that you're it's just so different,

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Speaker 1: I know, but it's it's amazing how our hearts have

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Speaker 1: grown in the Yeah, that's funny too. How literally the

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Speaker 1: night before we're looking at Julie Wick. How can we

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Speaker 1: love another human being as much as Jolie? And immediately

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Speaker 1: as James comes out your heart, you know, it's like

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Speaker 1: the Grinch like gets sometimes big, Like in a matter

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Speaker 1: of a second, he's so perfect love and already we

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Speaker 1: love him in so much, but in a different way.

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Speaker 1: I know, he's our little boy. He's so handsome, he's

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Speaker 1: so handsome. He might be cuter than Jolie he was.

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Speaker 1: I'm just putting that out there. I think he might

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Speaker 1: be a cuter baby then Jolie, which is crazy to think.

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Speaker 1: I can't believe you didn't say that. Jolie is like perfect,

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Speaker 1: she is, he's handsome. I don't know what to do

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Speaker 1: with his peep though. It's like the balls and the

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Speaker 1: you know, having to wipe around the ball like that's

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Speaker 1: a lot of Like you guys have to deal with that.

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Speaker 1: You gotta wipe your balls like that. I mean, as

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Speaker 1: a grown man, I'm not pooping in a diaper soop

401
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Speaker 1: to get all over my balls. But yeah, and you

402
00:21:11,320 --> 00:21:14,359
Speaker 1: gotta be careful. You can't, you know, you gotta. I

403
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Speaker 1: don't know what to do with it. It's just so

404
00:21:16,240 --> 00:21:22,840
Speaker 1: like flimsy and just the balls yet no grow he's

405
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Speaker 1: had him. He's had a boner, Yeah, a little baby browner.

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Speaker 1: Stop yeah already, No, that's disgusting. You can you can

407
00:21:31,800 --> 00:21:34,320
Speaker 1: barely tell because it's like whatever, you just you can

408
00:21:34,359 --> 00:21:36,000
Speaker 1: do all the diaper changes because I know how to

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Speaker 1: deal with the vagina, so I had to learn the

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Speaker 1: vagina and wiping. Gotta wipe down, not up, and all

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Speaker 1: this other stuff and gotta get in there and they

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Speaker 1: gotta get in there. Yeah, I've done that. You can

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Speaker 1: do that with a ball sack. It's just weird, you know.

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Speaker 1: It's also been really helpful though, during all this Hell

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Speaker 1: of Fresh coming to our rescue. Oh my god, how

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Speaker 1: many nights did my parents and us were like what

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Speaker 1: are we gonna have for dinner? And we're like, oh wait,

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Speaker 1: we have another Hell of Fresh meal. Serious, It's saved

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Speaker 1: our life. It's been fantastic. I mean especially for me

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Speaker 1: because I don't cook right so this inspires you a

421
00:22:07,880 --> 00:22:09,800
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422
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423
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424
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425
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426
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Speaker 1: wedges and wrist of green bes. And I'm a stickler

427
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428
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429
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430
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431
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433
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434
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435
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436
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437
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438
00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:06,440
Speaker 1: So we're building our house right now in Nashville, and

439
00:23:07,680 --> 00:23:12,200
Speaker 1: it's looking good. We're so excited. It's I mean, we

440
00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:16,080
Speaker 1: cannot wait. They're they're framing the second floor right now

441
00:23:16,160 --> 00:23:18,320
Speaker 1: and we're getting pictures JS like, can we move in yet?

442
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Speaker 1: I know their stairs? We can move in? Does that

443
00:23:20,880 --> 00:23:22,320
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444
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445
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446
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449
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450
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451
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452
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453
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456
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458
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459
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:16,000
Speaker 1: They're the best. Allright. We got Dr Gail Salts on hold.

460
00:24:16,119 --> 00:24:18,359
Speaker 1: Later on, we're gonna have Serena Vincent, who is a

461
00:24:18,440 --> 00:24:22,840
Speaker 1: former Yellow Power Ranger and also is pregnant and doing

462
00:24:22,920 --> 00:24:25,760
Speaker 1: ten weeks. That's crazy. I can't wait to talk to

463
00:24:25,760 --> 00:24:28,159
Speaker 1: about that. I tell her all about the horror stories

464
00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:34,000
Speaker 1: about how amazing it is. Hey Dr Gail, Hi, Hi,

465
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:37,040
Speaker 1: how you doing good? How are you good? Good? We're

466
00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:39,080
Speaker 1: so happy to have you on the phone with us.

467
00:24:39,320 --> 00:24:43,640
Speaker 1: We're happy to be with you. Um. So, Michael and

468
00:24:43,680 --> 00:24:47,679
Speaker 1: I just had a baby. We now have um we

469
00:24:47,760 --> 00:24:52,120
Speaker 1: now have two beautiful kids plural. Yeah, so we're dealing

470
00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:57,800
Speaker 1: with that right now. Anxiety, pressure, stresses, expectations, you know,

471
00:24:57,920 --> 00:25:01,600
Speaker 1: the whole nine yards yeah, Well, having a newborn is

472
00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:06,280
Speaker 1: stressful in many ways. Even even joyous things can be

473
00:25:06,480 --> 00:25:11,320
Speaker 1: highly anxiety producing. Question um, especially with the lack of sleep.

474
00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:14,199
Speaker 1: Something happened the other day where I wanted to express

475
00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:18,000
Speaker 1: my feelings and Michael I didn't think that I needed

476
00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:20,199
Speaker 1: to express my feelings. He goes, this isn't and express

477
00:25:20,280 --> 00:25:24,679
Speaker 1: your feelings conversation, and I was like, excuse me, Like

478
00:25:24,720 --> 00:25:26,639
Speaker 1: are you saying my feelings don't matter? He's like, you

479
00:25:26,640 --> 00:25:28,320
Speaker 1: don't need to express them, and I'm like, I have

480
00:25:28,400 --> 00:25:32,000
Speaker 1: to express my feelings. I was like, I'm hormonal, and

481
00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:34,440
Speaker 1: I just say what I'm gonna say. But it's because,

482
00:25:34,480 --> 00:25:36,359
Speaker 1: you know, he was He's tired, and he's like, do

483
00:25:36,440 --> 00:25:38,000
Speaker 1: we really have to have this conversation? Like, I know

484
00:25:38,040 --> 00:25:40,240
Speaker 1: what you're gonna say, but I needed to get it out,

485
00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:43,160
Speaker 1: and I know I was sleep deprived to I mean,

486
00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:46,080
Speaker 1: how do you how do you navigate being sleep deprived,

487
00:25:46,119 --> 00:25:52,600
Speaker 1: being hormonal, having two kids, one screaming and then one sick. Well, well,

488
00:25:52,720 --> 00:25:55,080
Speaker 1: let me just say that, you know you you are

489
00:25:55,280 --> 00:26:00,399
Speaker 1: very recent so the first you know having um. You know,

490
00:26:00,760 --> 00:26:03,359
Speaker 1: sometimes it's called baby blues, but baby blues doesn't just

491
00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:06,520
Speaker 1: mean blues that means like labile boes like up and

492
00:26:06,560 --> 00:26:12,800
Speaker 1: down or irritable or anxious. Um are is is a

493
00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:17,600
Speaker 1: real phenomenon that's exceedingly common. I'm not talking about postpartum depression,

494
00:26:18,040 --> 00:26:20,160
Speaker 1: which is also one out of ten women, but much

495
00:26:20,200 --> 00:26:25,360
Speaker 1: more common is this emotional ability and anxiety and moodiness

496
00:26:25,520 --> 00:26:30,080
Speaker 1: and and teeriness. That's the real thing. Um, and it

497
00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:35,080
Speaker 1: is hormonally mediated. And um, you know, I think just

498
00:26:35,359 --> 00:26:39,520
Speaker 1: knowing that you knowing that, like you knowing that is

499
00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:43,440
Speaker 1: helpful because it's it's not such a it's not something

500
00:26:43,440 --> 00:26:46,560
Speaker 1: you necessarily have so much control over. Um. Yeah, I

501
00:26:46,560 --> 00:26:48,120
Speaker 1: mean I don't even feel like I have control over

502
00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:50,920
Speaker 1: I'm like why, I'm like, I feel out of my body.

503
00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:53,119
Speaker 1: It's some of these you don't because you don't have

504
00:26:53,160 --> 00:26:56,680
Speaker 1: so much control over it. That being said, um, there

505
00:26:56,720 --> 00:26:59,320
Speaker 1: are there are things to do to help yourself a

506
00:26:59,359 --> 00:27:03,280
Speaker 1: little bit in the moment. Um. Definitely having a little

507
00:27:03,280 --> 00:27:07,240
Speaker 1: bit of scooped out time for anything that can be

508
00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:10,480
Speaker 1: relaxing to you sometimes believe it or not, that's a

509
00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:14,600
Speaker 1: little bit of exercise which actually helps regulate your mood. Um.

510
00:27:14,800 --> 00:27:17,160
Speaker 1: What whatever you're able to do, VISA, be your doctor,

511
00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:19,880
Speaker 1: you know, whatever they say is it's okay to be doing.

512
00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:23,680
Speaker 1: But something a little even a walk, um, can be helpful.

513
00:27:24,160 --> 00:27:27,199
Speaker 1: Listening to some relaxing music for a little while or

514
00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:30,040
Speaker 1: watching a show that you enjoy, something where you get

515
00:27:30,080 --> 00:27:34,280
Speaker 1: like snippets of a little bit of relaxation time is

516
00:27:34,320 --> 00:27:37,000
Speaker 1: a good thing. Um. And being able to talk about

517
00:27:37,040 --> 00:27:40,520
Speaker 1: your feelings is is a useful thing. It definitely can

518
00:27:40,520 --> 00:27:43,840
Speaker 1: make you feel better, even if in the moment apparently

519
00:27:43,840 --> 00:27:47,600
Speaker 1: it's not making life feel better. You know, understanding that

520
00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:50,879
Speaker 1: actually that is helpful. It's helpful to her, and in

521
00:27:50,920 --> 00:27:53,159
Speaker 1: the long run, let's be real, it's helpful to her,

522
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:57,080
Speaker 1: it's helpful to you as as we like to stay

523
00:27:57,119 --> 00:27:59,840
Speaker 1: around around my home. If the mom is not content though, no,

524
00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:04,119
Speaker 1: but you con so you know, so sore, there is

525
00:28:04,160 --> 00:28:07,520
Speaker 1: something to that. Sleep is important um, and it is

526
00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:09,879
Speaker 1: hard to get for both of you, and sleep depervation

527
00:28:09,960 --> 00:28:13,679
Speaker 1: for either one of you. But even if you're not mormonal, Mike, um,

528
00:28:13,760 --> 00:28:20,560
Speaker 1: sleep depervation definitely increases irritability and anger and UM and

529
00:28:20,560 --> 00:28:24,960
Speaker 1: and stress and depression ultimately, UM, So it is important

530
00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:28,760
Speaker 1: to if you have to take turns um catching up

531
00:28:28,760 --> 00:28:31,160
Speaker 1: on sleep to allow the other one to do that

532
00:28:31,480 --> 00:28:34,320
Speaker 1: if you if you need to get some outside support

533
00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:37,200
Speaker 1: so you can get some sleep, whether that's a nap

534
00:28:37,359 --> 00:28:40,440
Speaker 1: or you know, being able to sleep you know, in

535
00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:43,240
Speaker 1: a little bit, or have one time where you aren't

536
00:28:43,280 --> 00:28:48,080
Speaker 1: getting up for beating, etcetera. Um, that's that's really that

537
00:28:48,320 --> 00:28:52,600
Speaker 1: is really important. Um And frankly, others think pretty much

538
00:28:52,600 --> 00:28:56,760
Speaker 1: everything else doesn't matter as much of pretty much. You know,

539
00:28:57,360 --> 00:29:00,960
Speaker 1: how lovely you look, how well grews you are. I'm

540
00:29:00,960 --> 00:29:04,760
Speaker 1: talking about this first month. You know, how how much

541
00:29:04,840 --> 00:29:09,960
Speaker 1: you you do things with other people, you know, those things, um,

542
00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:12,320
Speaker 1: you know will will kind of fall by the wayside

543
00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:16,280
Speaker 1: as well. Sadly, like, um, you know a lot of

544
00:29:16,320 --> 00:29:20,960
Speaker 1: sexual stuff falled by the wayside in the first month

545
00:29:21,080 --> 00:29:25,840
Speaker 1: because it is so it's physically taxing and it's hormonally taxing.

546
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:29,440
Speaker 1: You know. It's funny too. I I think I didn't

547
00:29:29,440 --> 00:29:33,480
Speaker 1: really mentally prepare prepare myself for the aftermath because all

548
00:29:33,560 --> 00:29:36,720
Speaker 1: you know, the previous nine ten the previous nine ten months.

549
00:29:36,760 --> 00:29:38,719
Speaker 1: You know, it's in my head, it's like, Okay, be patient,

550
00:29:38,760 --> 00:29:42,120
Speaker 1: she's pregnant, she's doing this, And I feel like maybe

551
00:29:42,160 --> 00:29:45,040
Speaker 1: as soon as the baby was out, I was like

552
00:29:45,240 --> 00:29:47,560
Speaker 1: all right, well you're not prey anymore, Like let's do

553
00:29:47,680 --> 00:29:52,360
Speaker 1: like what you're good like back to like teamwork, Like

554
00:29:52,920 --> 00:29:54,600
Speaker 1: it sounds bad, but you have two legs at work,

555
00:29:54,640 --> 00:29:58,360
Speaker 1: like let let's let's do I'm not saying about extreme,

556
00:29:58,440 --> 00:30:00,800
Speaker 1: but maybe a little bit where like okay, let's do

557
00:30:00,840 --> 00:30:04,200
Speaker 1: this teamwork. But so I I will call myself out

558
00:30:04,440 --> 00:30:08,360
Speaker 1: and I can reassessmentally. You know, it's really common when

559
00:30:08,360 --> 00:30:11,320
Speaker 1: you're how old is your daughter? She she'll be three

560
00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:15,920
Speaker 1: in January, so you know, you it's it's three years, Like,

561
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:18,959
Speaker 1: it's really easy to forget what it was like that

562
00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:23,000
Speaker 1: first month. And that's that's mother nature's way, that's our

563
00:30:23,040 --> 00:30:26,960
Speaker 1: brain's way defensively of a not of allowing our species

564
00:30:26,960 --> 00:30:29,360
Speaker 1: to continue on, because if you could remember every single

565
00:30:29,360 --> 00:30:31,800
Speaker 1: one of these things as vividly as they are in

566
00:30:31,880 --> 00:30:35,800
Speaker 1: the moment, you would not have more kids. So actually

567
00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:40,480
Speaker 1: it's actually really important that to some degree what we

568
00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:43,200
Speaker 1: we painted with rose colored glasses and and you know,

569
00:30:43,680 --> 00:30:46,680
Speaker 1: retrospectively and so actually you probably don't remember, but it

570
00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:49,120
Speaker 1: probably was like this the first go round. This is

571
00:30:49,160 --> 00:30:51,800
Speaker 1: harder because now you have three year old also, and

572
00:30:51,840 --> 00:30:54,720
Speaker 1: so you're it's not like you can hand one, you know,

573
00:30:54,800 --> 00:30:57,200
Speaker 1: the baby to one and the others off. You know,

574
00:30:57,280 --> 00:31:00,560
Speaker 1: you you're sort of double teaming, and that's that is harder,

575
00:31:00,640 --> 00:31:03,120
Speaker 1: more stusful. And you've got to deal with your daughter's

576
00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:07,000
Speaker 1: feelings about having this new interloper you know, in your lives,

577
00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:11,440
Speaker 1: um and and so it's understandable, but you didn't remember,

578
00:31:11,520 --> 00:31:14,840
Speaker 1: and it's wishful thinking and understandably had to that it

579
00:31:14,880 --> 00:31:17,200
Speaker 1: would just go back to the way it was before

580
00:31:17,240 --> 00:31:20,120
Speaker 1: she got pregnant. But but it really isn't like that

581
00:31:20,160 --> 00:31:23,200
Speaker 1: pretty much for anyone, even if you have supports, but

582
00:31:23,320 --> 00:31:25,760
Speaker 1: makes use of support. This is where grandparents can make

583
00:31:25,800 --> 00:31:29,080
Speaker 1: a big difference, um of taking a three year old

584
00:31:29,200 --> 00:31:32,160
Speaker 1: or even taking a baby for a little while um

585
00:31:32,240 --> 00:31:34,840
Speaker 1: or you know, if if you could afford some some

586
00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:38,760
Speaker 1: extra health, that's obviously a big, big plus UM. But

587
00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:42,000
Speaker 1: being able to have someone an extra pair of hands

588
00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:44,520
Speaker 1: and and may even even more like a mind, an

589
00:31:44,560 --> 00:31:49,120
Speaker 1: extra mind in there that can offload you in the beginning, UM,

590
00:31:49,160 --> 00:31:53,560
Speaker 1: so you can sort of at least physically physiologically recover

591
00:31:53,840 --> 00:31:57,480
Speaker 1: for sure. You know, now that we're growing our family,

592
00:31:57,560 --> 00:31:59,920
Speaker 1: doctor Gale, you know, something that will come up as

593
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:02,120
Speaker 1: we continue as the family grows and so on and

594
00:32:02,240 --> 00:32:05,960
Speaker 1: so forth. Is obviously this time of year holiday stresses, right,

595
00:32:06,120 --> 00:32:08,680
Speaker 1: debating where are you gonna go for Thanksgiving? What are

596
00:32:08,680 --> 00:32:11,040
Speaker 1: we gonna do for Christmas? Where our families growing? We

597
00:32:11,080 --> 00:32:13,680
Speaker 1: want to start our own tradition, how do like, what's

598
00:32:13,680 --> 00:32:17,040
Speaker 1: the best way to navigate navigate those things? When you

599
00:32:17,040 --> 00:32:18,880
Speaker 1: want to start you own traditions, but at the same time,

600
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:20,480
Speaker 1: you want to be with the rest of your family,

601
00:32:20,600 --> 00:32:24,959
Speaker 1: like you know right, well, um, you know I I

602
00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:27,640
Speaker 1: would say you're going to make compromise. And I mean

603
00:32:27,760 --> 00:32:30,280
Speaker 1: the word compromise is really the name of the game

604
00:32:30,360 --> 00:32:32,480
Speaker 1: for just about everything. Right, your three year olds not

605
00:32:32,680 --> 00:32:34,720
Speaker 1: going to get as much as they got before. That's

606
00:32:34,760 --> 00:32:37,880
Speaker 1: going to be your compromise. You know, the baby doesn't

607
00:32:37,880 --> 00:32:41,960
Speaker 1: get to be first born, that's they're compromised. You guys

608
00:32:42,000 --> 00:32:44,000
Speaker 1: are gonna have to do lots of compromising. And the

609
00:32:44,040 --> 00:32:46,200
Speaker 1: same is true here for when you start thinking about

610
00:32:46,920 --> 00:32:49,480
Speaker 1: how do you build your family unit with the traditions

611
00:32:49,520 --> 00:32:50,920
Speaker 1: that you're going to want to have, and at the

612
00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:54,360
Speaker 1: same time, you know not well, part of the traditions

613
00:32:54,400 --> 00:32:57,440
Speaker 1: they're probably going to include other relatives. The problem is

614
00:32:57,480 --> 00:33:00,000
Speaker 1: is our family doesn't you know, my families in Michigan

615
00:33:00,040 --> 00:33:03,040
Speaker 1: and his families in Virginia, and you know, I have

616
00:33:03,080 --> 00:33:07,240
Speaker 1: a very strong opinion about Christmas, about you know, starting

617
00:33:07,280 --> 00:33:10,920
Speaker 1: our own tradition, and so you know Michael does too,

618
00:33:10,920 --> 00:33:12,640
Speaker 1: but he also is like, Okay, well, you know, we

619
00:33:12,720 --> 00:33:14,800
Speaker 1: need to go home sometime. But I'm like, but I

620
00:33:15,120 --> 00:33:19,200
Speaker 1: I just I never got to have that. Yes, I

621
00:33:19,240 --> 00:33:22,520
Speaker 1: woke up in my my home, you know, for Christmas,

622
00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:24,520
Speaker 1: but then I was pulled every which way because my

623
00:33:24,520 --> 00:33:26,760
Speaker 1: parents were divorced. And it's like, I just want my

624
00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:30,440
Speaker 1: kids to be in their home on Christmas morning and

625
00:33:30,520 --> 00:33:34,120
Speaker 1: just and almost have the Christmas is that I didn't

626
00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:37,360
Speaker 1: get to have, you know, and and started and but

627
00:33:37,520 --> 00:33:39,880
Speaker 1: I like, did you did you have that kind of

628
00:33:39,880 --> 00:33:45,560
Speaker 1: prisms to um, my parents have been together for thirty

629
00:33:45,560 --> 00:33:47,600
Speaker 1: plus years, and so I woke up and it was

630
00:33:47,920 --> 00:33:50,160
Speaker 1: every year, you know, Christmas Eve was my dad's side

631
00:33:50,160 --> 00:33:52,160
Speaker 1: of the family, Christmas Day was my mom's side of

632
00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:55,680
Speaker 1: the family, and it was pretty regimented. And that's the

633
00:33:55,720 --> 00:33:59,640
Speaker 1: one holiday that was pretty consistent. Thanksgiving kind of fell

634
00:33:59,680 --> 00:34:02,680
Speaker 1: off later in life, but Christmas has always been more

635
00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:06,240
Speaker 1: of the constant. Now with cousins and relatives scattering all

636
00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:08,720
Speaker 1: over the country and being older, it's it's not the same.

637
00:34:08,760 --> 00:34:11,160
Speaker 1: But as a kid, I mean, have great memories of

638
00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:14,440
Speaker 1: Christmas because it was the same thing every year. And

639
00:34:14,480 --> 00:34:17,719
Speaker 1: so would your parents come in for if you if

640
00:34:17,760 --> 00:34:20,840
Speaker 1: you meet Christmas in your in your home, would your

641
00:34:20,880 --> 00:34:22,760
Speaker 1: parents come in for that? Or that won't work because

642
00:34:22,760 --> 00:34:25,839
Speaker 1: there are other siblings And yeah, right now, no, because

643
00:34:25,840 --> 00:34:29,000
Speaker 1: there's other siblings of a younger brother that's you know,

644
00:34:29,719 --> 00:34:33,000
Speaker 1: finishing up high school, of her sister that lives a

645
00:34:33,080 --> 00:34:36,400
Speaker 1: state a state away, and and your mom likes to

646
00:34:36,440 --> 00:34:39,319
Speaker 1: have you know, she likes to keep everybody together, which

647
00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:41,279
Speaker 1: is amazing. It's a great it's a great thing that

648
00:34:41,360 --> 00:34:43,600
Speaker 1: she wants to try to have everyone. Yeah, it's one

649
00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:45,240
Speaker 1: of those things where I want to start our tradition

650
00:34:45,239 --> 00:34:48,600
Speaker 1: at home too. But all I'm saying is eventually, like

651
00:34:49,160 --> 00:34:51,000
Speaker 1: it would be cool for the kids to be like, hey,

652
00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:54,200
Speaker 1: we're going to Grandma Grandpa's this year for for Christmas.

653
00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:57,600
Speaker 1: You know, it's true. When you when you when you want,

654
00:34:58,360 --> 00:35:00,680
Speaker 1: I will tell you it's a wonderful families to have

655
00:35:00,920 --> 00:35:06,560
Speaker 1: their own traditions, and a tradition doesn't necessarily depend on

656
00:35:06,800 --> 00:35:09,280
Speaker 1: exactly where you are and there's obviously you can build

657
00:35:09,280 --> 00:35:11,920
Speaker 1: in other things like we always it doesn't have to

658
00:35:11,920 --> 00:35:15,759
Speaker 1: be like it's here. Um, we always open things this way.

659
00:35:15,840 --> 00:35:18,720
Speaker 1: We always have whatever popcorn around our tree. We always

660
00:35:18,719 --> 00:35:21,600
Speaker 1: have whatever it is that you could make up that

661
00:35:21,680 --> 00:35:25,600
Speaker 1: could have to do with decorating, baking, But you know,

662
00:35:26,040 --> 00:35:30,280
Speaker 1: it's just about anything, um but building it picking picking

663
00:35:30,320 --> 00:35:32,560
Speaker 1: a few things that you feel like you're in a

664
00:35:32,640 --> 00:35:37,440
Speaker 1: year out you'd like to include. Um, it's definitely a

665
00:35:37,560 --> 00:35:42,040
Speaker 1: nice thing and does build those childhood memories and stealing

666
00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:46,800
Speaker 1: a connection of home. Um, but home being your family,

667
00:35:46,920 --> 00:35:49,840
Speaker 1: your nuclear family, and so your nuclear family doesn't have

668
00:35:49,880 --> 00:35:52,680
Speaker 1: to be in your house per se, but it could be.

669
00:35:52,719 --> 00:35:54,879
Speaker 1: You know, we always go to this place and that

670
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:57,600
Speaker 1: is our family. I want it to be in our house.

671
00:35:58,320 --> 00:35:59,719
Speaker 1: So the thing is I was going to say, so

672
00:35:59,880 --> 00:36:02,000
Speaker 1: the question is, you know, what do each of you

673
00:36:02,040 --> 00:36:05,279
Speaker 1: have to come, you know, together and say I think

674
00:36:05,360 --> 00:36:09,239
Speaker 1: the three most important things to me about you know,

675
00:36:09,360 --> 00:36:14,719
Speaker 1: forming our our nuclear tradition would be ABC. Hopefully you

676
00:36:14,800 --> 00:36:17,719
Speaker 1: have some that overlap those obviously rise to the top

677
00:36:17,760 --> 00:36:20,600
Speaker 1: of the list, and the ones that don't that are different,

678
00:36:21,360 --> 00:36:24,919
Speaker 1: Why do you want them? Why are they important to you? Um,

679
00:36:25,000 --> 00:36:27,319
Speaker 1: what kind of compromises can be made if we do

680
00:36:27,440 --> 00:36:30,239
Speaker 1: like the day after Christmas we travel the day after

681
00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:32,400
Speaker 1: Christmas to go there, or like does it have to

682
00:36:32,440 --> 00:36:37,680
Speaker 1: be for Christmas for you? I don't know. I mean

683
00:36:37,760 --> 00:36:40,760
Speaker 1: that's something that again we know that obviously this Christmas

684
00:36:40,800 --> 00:36:43,279
Speaker 1: were here. Next Christmas will be our first new house

685
00:36:43,280 --> 00:36:45,239
Speaker 1: and Nashville, so we're going to be there and then

686
00:36:45,280 --> 00:36:48,480
Speaker 1: what happens after that, who knows, We'll figure it out,

687
00:36:48,520 --> 00:36:50,200
Speaker 1: but we know the next time. I want to know now,

688
00:36:50,680 --> 00:36:53,160
Speaker 1: So that's going to say. So one thing I hear

689
00:36:53,160 --> 00:36:55,239
Speaker 1: you're saying, right, Jann, is like you're like, I want

690
00:36:55,239 --> 00:36:58,000
Speaker 1: to know just will always be and you know, you

691
00:36:58,080 --> 00:37:00,600
Speaker 1: know that that is fueled by the feeling that you

692
00:37:00,640 --> 00:37:02,640
Speaker 1: never knew where you were going to be exactly. And

693
00:37:02,680 --> 00:37:04,359
Speaker 1: that's where I'm like, I almost want to cry because

694
00:37:04,360 --> 00:37:06,640
Speaker 1: it's like I already feel that anxiety of being like

695
00:37:06,719 --> 00:37:08,839
Speaker 1: pulled on the holiday, and it's like what you have

696
00:37:08,920 --> 00:37:13,480
Speaker 1: to remember is that something that's fueled by a trauma

697
00:37:13,560 --> 00:37:18,000
Speaker 1: of the past can make it feel like that's really

698
00:37:18,239 --> 00:37:21,440
Speaker 1: dire in the current or disaster will happen, and for

699
00:37:21,520 --> 00:37:23,880
Speaker 1: you as a child, that wasn't disaster your parents divorced,

700
00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:28,640
Speaker 1: and you know, if that felt disastrous, But that anxiety

701
00:37:28,880 --> 00:37:32,680
Speaker 1: isn't necessarily rooted in the reality of today, right, it's

702
00:37:32,719 --> 00:37:36,160
Speaker 1: from It's from before, and you're putting it on today.

703
00:37:36,880 --> 00:37:42,799
Speaker 1: And if Mike understands the importance of continuity and he

704
00:37:42,840 --> 00:37:45,560
Speaker 1: feels the same way, he wants traditions too, and he

705
00:37:45,600 --> 00:37:49,000
Speaker 1: wants continuity with his family. Two, he wants all the

706
00:37:49,040 --> 00:37:53,480
Speaker 1: same things. Um, you will feel less anxious if you're

707
00:37:53,520 --> 00:37:57,239
Speaker 1: able to say to yourself some level of um, hey,

708
00:37:57,320 --> 00:37:59,879
Speaker 1: this is about what did happen to me, not what's

709
00:38:00,160 --> 00:38:02,440
Speaker 1: going to happen to me. But here's here's the problem.

710
00:38:02,520 --> 00:38:04,600
Speaker 1: I totally hear you. But what I hear when Mike

711
00:38:04,680 --> 00:38:07,880
Speaker 1: said what he said was that we're doing Christmas. And

712
00:38:08,120 --> 00:38:09,719
Speaker 1: you know, because we're living in l A right now,

713
00:38:09,840 --> 00:38:11,840
Speaker 1: we're going to have Christmas in our house in Nashville.

714
00:38:11,920 --> 00:38:15,200
Speaker 1: But after that, when he says that, we'll see in

715
00:38:15,320 --> 00:38:17,359
Speaker 1: my brain what he just said to me is every

716
00:38:17,400 --> 00:38:19,560
Speaker 1: year after that will be in Virginia. No, not at all.

717
00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:22,839
Speaker 1: But that's what I I'm just saying, like, and I

718
00:38:22,840 --> 00:38:24,360
Speaker 1: know that's not what you say. I'm just saying what

719
00:38:24,400 --> 00:38:26,400
Speaker 1: I heard. And that's where my anxiety was like, but

720
00:38:26,440 --> 00:38:28,160
Speaker 1: I need you to tell me that then every year

721
00:38:28,239 --> 00:38:30,480
Speaker 1: and then maybe one of those years will go like

722
00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:34,400
Speaker 1: that's here's here's what when. So when you're having this

723
00:38:34,480 --> 00:38:38,040
Speaker 1: kind of conversation, right, do you want to say what

724
00:38:38,080 --> 00:38:42,120
Speaker 1: you what you said, and then you want the other

725
00:38:42,160 --> 00:38:44,560
Speaker 1: person to be able to say, I heard this because

726
00:38:44,640 --> 00:38:46,880
Speaker 1: just what happened just now. This is more about a

727
00:38:46,880 --> 00:38:50,239
Speaker 1: couple of therapy. But actually a couple of therapy is

728
00:38:50,760 --> 00:38:54,560
Speaker 1: really like the most important one. You've just had a child.

729
00:38:54,680 --> 00:38:56,759
Speaker 1: That's like because it brings up all these things from

730
00:38:56,800 --> 00:38:59,760
Speaker 1: your own childhood. When you have a child, you hearkened

731
00:38:59,760 --> 00:39:01,960
Speaker 1: back to all those childhood things for yourself, how you

732
00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:03,160
Speaker 1: want to be the same, how you want it to

733
00:39:03,160 --> 00:39:06,160
Speaker 1: be different, etcetera. And what you're nervous about. But you

734
00:39:06,200 --> 00:39:08,799
Speaker 1: heard might say something you didn't say right now, yeah,

735
00:39:09,480 --> 00:39:11,120
Speaker 1: when you can tell him that's what I heard, and

736
00:39:11,160 --> 00:39:12,840
Speaker 1: he says, but that's not what I mean. What I

737
00:39:12,880 --> 00:39:17,319
Speaker 1: mean is it's it's hard to know exactly for the

738
00:39:17,360 --> 00:39:21,360
Speaker 1: next one a year, exactly where we'll spend every Christmas.

739
00:39:21,400 --> 00:39:26,680
Speaker 1: But I also want, you know, continuity, instability and etcetera, etcetera,

740
00:39:26,719 --> 00:39:29,239
Speaker 1: And definitely some of our Christmases will for sure be

741
00:39:29,320 --> 00:39:33,759
Speaker 1: at home, but I want, especially with my parents, that

742
00:39:36,200 --> 00:39:40,440
Speaker 1: what you want, I know. I'm like, I'm having anxiety

743
00:39:40,440 --> 00:39:43,160
Speaker 1: with Yeah, I think it's what you want. Some of

744
00:39:43,200 --> 00:39:47,920
Speaker 1: the Christmas to be home, or I want majority of

745
00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:52,360
Speaker 1: them to be at our our home. And then every

746
00:39:52,360 --> 00:39:55,960
Speaker 1: other year, every every time years. I don't know as

747
00:39:55,960 --> 00:39:58,160
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, I don't know. I'm just I don't know.

748
00:39:58,280 --> 00:40:01,280
Speaker 1: We have to discuss it. But I'm saying we're discussing

749
00:40:01,280 --> 00:40:04,160
Speaker 1: you right now is eventually my parents are going to

750
00:40:04,239 --> 00:40:05,920
Speaker 1: move out of the house there and they're going to downsize,

751
00:40:06,280 --> 00:40:08,600
Speaker 1: and then we then we won't be going back. And

752
00:40:08,640 --> 00:40:11,239
Speaker 1: as the kids get older, I definitely don't want to

753
00:40:11,239 --> 00:40:12,719
Speaker 1: travel with them, And I don't want to travel the

754
00:40:12,760 --> 00:40:14,239
Speaker 1: day after Christmas because I don't want to have the

755
00:40:14,280 --> 00:40:17,239
Speaker 1: anxiety of our kids. We're leaving tomorrow, like on Christmas Day,

756
00:40:17,239 --> 00:40:19,560
Speaker 1: we gotta pack and leave tomorrow for Grandma Grandpa's right,

757
00:40:19,560 --> 00:40:21,560
Speaker 1: But then we're spending all this money shipping everything back

758
00:40:21,760 --> 00:40:23,360
Speaker 1: and I don't I just I don't want to. I

759
00:40:23,400 --> 00:40:24,960
Speaker 1: don't want to do it every of the year. I'm saying,

760
00:40:25,120 --> 00:40:26,959
Speaker 1: I just don't want to do that. But you just said,

761
00:40:27,040 --> 00:40:30,279
Speaker 1: like that's what you were thinking, and I don't want

762
00:40:30,280 --> 00:40:35,279
Speaker 1: that either. I'm just throwing that Jesus Christ. Okay, So

763
00:40:36,800 --> 00:40:40,279
Speaker 1: this could be a very productive conversation if you each

764
00:40:40,360 --> 00:40:44,080
Speaker 1: give the other a little more time to say, so

765
00:40:44,320 --> 00:40:47,640
Speaker 1: what you're feeling. So like Jenna saying I would really

766
00:40:47,680 --> 00:40:50,760
Speaker 1: want to feel that most of our Christmas is would

767
00:40:50,760 --> 00:40:55,160
Speaker 1: be in our home, and Mike is actually saying the

768
00:40:55,280 --> 00:40:58,840
Speaker 1: same thing. Doesn't want to be nailed to the wall

769
00:40:58,840 --> 00:41:01,879
Speaker 1: on it, because why Mike, what what do you feel

770
00:41:01,960 --> 00:41:07,200
Speaker 1: nervous about? Um? I just I don't see why we're

771
00:41:07,239 --> 00:41:11,880
Speaker 1: three years out from us even potentially going back. I

772
00:41:11,880 --> 00:41:15,279
Speaker 1: don't we might not ever go back. Who knows, we

773
00:41:15,360 --> 00:41:17,319
Speaker 1: have like, we don't know what in three years what

774
00:41:17,400 --> 00:41:18,960
Speaker 1: things are going to look like. And maybe we're just

775
00:41:19,040 --> 00:41:22,520
Speaker 1: both you know what, We're just gonna have Christmas here? Sorry, sorry,

776
00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:24,320
Speaker 1: you know, sorry, guys, if you guys want to have

777
00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:26,839
Speaker 1: Christmas like, we would love to have you down here,

778
00:41:26,840 --> 00:41:29,279
Speaker 1: and we have plenty of room. Maybe this could be

779
00:41:29,320 --> 00:41:32,319
Speaker 1: our tradition. It sounds to me like Mike is more

780
00:41:32,400 --> 00:41:35,360
Speaker 1: concerned with feeling that he doesn't have to make a

781
00:41:35,520 --> 00:41:40,920
Speaker 1: promise that is iron tight, but that do you feel

782
00:41:41,239 --> 00:41:45,000
Speaker 1: also like most of your Christmas is do you want

783
00:41:45,040 --> 00:41:47,640
Speaker 1: to be in your home? Yes, but you don't know

784
00:41:47,680 --> 00:41:49,520
Speaker 1: like your parents could move, they could not move. They

785
00:41:49,560 --> 00:41:52,799
Speaker 1: could in the next three years. So much is going

786
00:41:52,840 --> 00:41:55,959
Speaker 1: to change with Jane and I career wise, with with

787
00:41:56,080 --> 00:41:59,200
Speaker 1: my family back east, with what they're doing, with my

788
00:41:59,320 --> 00:42:02,360
Speaker 1: brother going to large of my parents potentially downsizing because

789
00:42:02,719 --> 00:42:05,600
Speaker 1: you know they're going to have a mike. You're speaking

790
00:42:05,640 --> 00:42:14,120
Speaker 1: of objectives, possible facts, and uncertainty and Canna, who has

791
00:42:14,160 --> 00:42:21,160
Speaker 1: come from an uncertain background and is week's postpartum in

792
00:42:21,480 --> 00:42:28,239
Speaker 1: what I am, and and newborns bring uncertainty of the

793
00:42:28,239 --> 00:42:31,000
Speaker 1: wazoo with them, like right every day is uncertain who

794
00:42:31,000 --> 00:42:33,200
Speaker 1: knows what's you know, like the baby will be await,

795
00:42:33,200 --> 00:42:35,239
Speaker 1: the baby asleep, but poop it won't it be it

796
00:42:35,280 --> 00:42:38,640
Speaker 1: won't it? And so she's at a time where it's

797
00:42:38,680 --> 00:42:43,919
Speaker 1: particularly hard to manage uncertainty. And maybe it's not even

798
00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:47,359
Speaker 1: her foretake even what has happened in her past um

799
00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:51,359
Speaker 1: for really, what you guys are talking about in terms

800
00:42:51,440 --> 00:42:55,880
Speaker 1: of factual stuff, you're not really on a different page.

801
00:42:56,600 --> 00:43:01,360
Speaker 1: It's the it's the emotional, the valance of do I

802
00:43:01,480 --> 00:43:04,520
Speaker 1: get certainty or don't I right? And it's the verbage

803
00:43:04,520 --> 00:43:07,319
Speaker 1: and vernacular that isn't matching up with what Jana wants

804
00:43:07,320 --> 00:43:10,640
Speaker 1: to hear. But the concept is like I can't breathe

805
00:43:10,640 --> 00:43:12,839
Speaker 1: when you said every other Christmas, Like it makes me

806
00:43:13,920 --> 00:43:16,120
Speaker 1: have so much anxiety thinking about that. So what you

807
00:43:16,160 --> 00:43:18,440
Speaker 1: have to know, Janna, is that he is not saying

808
00:43:18,840 --> 00:43:22,360
Speaker 1: it will be but he said those words, but he

809
00:43:22,719 --> 00:43:25,200
Speaker 1: also said the words, maybe every Christmas will be at

810
00:43:25,200 --> 00:43:27,480
Speaker 1: our house. Yes, we'll say that. What am I supposed

811
00:43:27,480 --> 00:43:29,040
Speaker 1: to do with that? Then when I hear one thing

812
00:43:29,080 --> 00:43:31,239
Speaker 1: and then I hear another thing because he's telling you

813
00:43:31,400 --> 00:43:34,960
Speaker 1: that he what he's really saying is I can't predict

814
00:43:34,960 --> 00:43:39,200
Speaker 1: the future. But basically, I want most of our Christmas

815
00:43:39,200 --> 00:43:41,759
Speaker 1: Is to be home, but I also want to acknowledge

816
00:43:41,760 --> 00:43:46,880
Speaker 1: the fact that there is uncertainty in life in the future.

817
00:43:47,880 --> 00:43:50,319
Speaker 1: That's where he's coming from. It feels to me that

818
00:43:50,480 --> 00:43:53,200
Speaker 1: you want either one of two things. You want me

819
00:43:53,280 --> 00:43:56,759
Speaker 1: to say every Christmas is gonna be at our house

820
00:43:57,160 --> 00:43:59,440
Speaker 1: or tell you exactly what you were going to go

821
00:43:59,560 --> 00:44:02,480
Speaker 1: back to Gene. When I'm all I'm saying is we

822
00:44:02,600 --> 00:44:05,120
Speaker 1: don't know. Don't ask me three years out. I'm giving

823
00:44:05,160 --> 00:44:07,879
Speaker 1: you both responses because I'm like, I don't know what's

824
00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:10,440
Speaker 1: going to happen, Like Dr Mike, Mike, would it be

825
00:44:10,520 --> 00:44:13,960
Speaker 1: hard for you to just say to Jenna, Um, I'm

826
00:44:14,000 --> 00:44:16,120
Speaker 1: listening to you. Do you want to know that we're

827
00:44:16,120 --> 00:44:19,200
Speaker 1: building tradition and tradition in our home and that most

828
00:44:19,239 --> 00:44:22,520
Speaker 1: of the time Christmas will be at our home with

829
00:44:22,560 --> 00:44:28,400
Speaker 1: our traditions. Do you that? Yes? I do, but know

830
00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:30,080
Speaker 1: in Janna as well as I do, because she is

831
00:44:30,120 --> 00:44:33,240
Speaker 1: my lovely wife, she always takes it a step lower

832
00:44:33,360 --> 00:44:36,040
Speaker 1: where if I say that, then she's like, that's but

833
00:44:36,560 --> 00:44:38,600
Speaker 1: how many years? Most of the time, No, that's not true.

834
00:44:38,680 --> 00:44:40,560
Speaker 1: That is absolutely true, because when you said those two

835
00:44:40,600 --> 00:44:42,080
Speaker 1: things to me right there, I said no and no.

836
00:44:42,400 --> 00:44:45,600
Speaker 1: What I would have, what I would hear is if

837
00:44:45,600 --> 00:44:49,360
Speaker 1: you said just what Gayle said the majority of the time,

838
00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:52,399
Speaker 1: I want us to do, but it would be nice

839
00:44:52,480 --> 00:44:56,439
Speaker 1: every once in a while or every you know, again,

840
00:44:56,480 --> 00:45:01,359
Speaker 1: don't give me a year, but just maybe you know,

841
00:45:01,680 --> 00:45:04,239
Speaker 1: I don't even know the right verbage just because you're

842
00:45:04,280 --> 00:45:08,560
Speaker 1: you're very hung up on a promise of the details

843
00:45:08,560 --> 00:45:12,040
Speaker 1: and what I'm saying. What I'm saying is um, it's

844
00:45:12,080 --> 00:45:15,319
Speaker 1: in those promises of details in the future, which has

845
00:45:15,360 --> 00:45:19,080
Speaker 1: to do all whenever you're talking so far out and

846
00:45:19,120 --> 00:45:22,000
Speaker 1: you have and let's let's be real, right, you can't

847
00:45:22,040 --> 00:45:24,160
Speaker 1: know that far out, So there's going to be a

848
00:45:24,200 --> 00:45:29,240
Speaker 1: measure of uncertainty. People who are anxious, and Jenna has

849
00:45:29,280 --> 00:45:33,720
Speaker 1: every reason you're just struggling with anxiety right now, really

850
00:45:33,760 --> 00:45:36,279
Speaker 1: have difficulty with that. So what I'm saying too, is, Jenna,

851
00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:39,000
Speaker 1: when you get that surge that you're talking about in

852
00:45:39,040 --> 00:45:41,920
Speaker 1: your body, that feeling of I've just heard that, you know,

853
00:45:42,280 --> 00:45:44,960
Speaker 1: when you get that, you have to identify that for

854
00:45:45,000 --> 00:45:48,760
Speaker 1: yourself as anxiety. That doesn't mean that what he's saying

855
00:45:48,880 --> 00:45:53,799
Speaker 1: is really the problem you. It's you have anxiety and

856
00:45:54,000 --> 00:45:56,720
Speaker 1: that kind of content of the uncertainty of the future

857
00:45:56,760 --> 00:45:59,000
Speaker 1: is tripping it off. And I feel like, because you

858
00:45:59,040 --> 00:46:02,359
Speaker 1: do hold on to exactly what I say, that if

859
00:46:02,400 --> 00:46:04,839
Speaker 1: I give you an answer that I'm unprepared to give,

860
00:46:04,960 --> 00:46:07,960
Speaker 1: just to either a peasy or whatever. And then the

861
00:46:08,000 --> 00:46:10,160
Speaker 1: conversation comes up in a few years or next year,

862
00:46:10,200 --> 00:46:12,480
Speaker 1: you're like, but you said that we would never go back,

863
00:46:12,560 --> 00:46:15,000
Speaker 1: or you said that we go back not this year,

864
00:46:15,040 --> 00:46:17,000
Speaker 1: but now you want to change it like I can't

865
00:46:17,000 --> 00:46:18,520
Speaker 1: take you for your word because you said this, but

866
00:46:18,560 --> 00:46:22,120
Speaker 1: now you're saying this. I understand your fear, but that's

867
00:46:22,280 --> 00:46:24,239
Speaker 1: I'm I'm not going to do that. I just don't

868
00:46:24,280 --> 00:46:27,319
Speaker 1: want to hear the what you said every other year.

869
00:46:27,440 --> 00:46:29,840
Speaker 1: I just can we just say the majority of the time,

870
00:46:30,440 --> 00:46:33,279
Speaker 1: but you'd love to go back sometime The majority of

871
00:46:33,320 --> 00:46:35,600
Speaker 1: the time, Christmas will be at our house, but I

872
00:46:35,640 --> 00:46:38,279
Speaker 1: would love to go back to Virginia at some point

873
00:46:38,280 --> 00:46:42,920
Speaker 1: in time. Thank you, Gail working our Where can our

874
00:46:43,040 --> 00:46:47,399
Speaker 1: listeners find you? Where can I find you and then

875
00:46:47,440 --> 00:46:50,160
Speaker 1: read more about you and what you have to offer. Sure,

876
00:46:51,480 --> 00:46:55,600
Speaker 1: I have a website www dot gail fat dot com.

877
00:46:55,640 --> 00:46:59,719
Speaker 1: I tweet which is at Dr Gail sault um and

878
00:47:00,000 --> 00:47:02,080
Speaker 1: EID one of those places they can ask me questions.

879
00:47:02,640 --> 00:47:05,600
Speaker 1: They can find me um. I loved your fift people.

880
00:47:05,640 --> 00:47:07,480
Speaker 1: I definitely try to if you tweet me and try

881
00:47:07,520 --> 00:47:09,759
Speaker 1: to answer your questions the best I can. Well, you're

882
00:47:09,800 --> 00:47:12,960
Speaker 1: the best, and you've saved Christmas in our household, So

883
00:47:13,000 --> 00:47:17,080
Speaker 1: thank you. We really appreciate it. Give yourselves some TLC

884
00:47:17,320 --> 00:47:20,600
Speaker 1: this month and and you'll see as as you move

885
00:47:20,640 --> 00:47:24,120
Speaker 1: out of months. One things to get incrementally a little easier.

886
00:47:24,160 --> 00:47:31,239
Speaker 1: All right, thank you really appreciate it. Guys. You know

887
00:47:31,680 --> 00:47:33,799
Speaker 1: this is a perfect time of year for stamps dot

888
00:47:33,800 --> 00:47:37,000
Speaker 1: Com holidays, isn't it. As you know, the holidays are

889
00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:39,359
Speaker 1: the busiest time of the year, and there's no place

890
00:47:39,400 --> 00:47:41,520
Speaker 1: I dread more than going to the post office. And

891
00:47:41,560 --> 00:47:43,120
Speaker 1: we even win a couple of weeks ago and it

892
00:47:43,239 --> 00:47:45,160
Speaker 1: was the line was like out the door is ridiculous.

893
00:47:45,239 --> 00:47:49,040
Speaker 1: We even went there thirty minutes early, your brother's package.

894
00:47:49,560 --> 00:47:51,720
Speaker 1: Especially now that we have two kids. That means loading

895
00:47:51,719 --> 00:47:54,279
Speaker 1: the babies up, loading the presence up, then unloading, the

896
00:47:54,400 --> 00:47:57,600
Speaker 1: unloading the presents, waiting in lines. Yeah, not happening. That's

897
00:47:57,600 --> 00:47:59,800
Speaker 1: why we're obsessed with stamps dot com because it brings

898
00:47:59,840 --> 00:48:03,080
Speaker 1: all the services of normal post office right to your desktop,

899
00:48:03,560 --> 00:48:06,680
Speaker 1: So you can buy and print any postage, any letter,

900
00:48:06,680 --> 00:48:09,320
Speaker 1: any package, any class of mail using your own computer

901
00:48:09,400 --> 00:48:11,360
Speaker 1: and printer, and then they'll actually send you a scale

902
00:48:11,400 --> 00:48:13,719
Speaker 1: to um if you're sending something, happy to see how

903
00:48:13,800 --> 00:48:17,160
Speaker 1: much you need. So right now, you too can enjoy

904
00:48:17,200 --> 00:48:19,400
Speaker 1: the stamps dot Com service with a special offer that

905
00:48:19,440 --> 00:48:23,040
Speaker 1: includes a four week trial plus postage and a digital

906
00:48:23,080 --> 00:48:26,080
Speaker 1: scale without long term commitments. So go to stamps dot com,

907
00:48:26,120 --> 00:48:27,960
Speaker 1: click on the microphone at the top of the homepage

908
00:48:28,000 --> 00:48:31,600
Speaker 1: and type in Janna that stamps dot com enter Jamma.

909
00:48:32,680 --> 00:48:35,520
Speaker 1: You know, Christmas was a little bit easier this year

910
00:48:35,560 --> 00:48:38,799
Speaker 1: to buy for all the males in our families, my dad,

911
00:48:38,880 --> 00:48:43,279
Speaker 1: your brother, my brother, my dad. I think I think

912
00:48:43,280 --> 00:48:46,560
Speaker 1: we even gave We even gave cousins presents just because

913
00:48:46,600 --> 00:48:49,120
Speaker 1: we could and we had an idea for him. And

914
00:48:49,440 --> 00:48:51,680
Speaker 1: it was super easy for you guys of Man Crates

915
00:48:52,080 --> 00:48:53,400
Speaker 1: And as you guys have listened to me before we

916
00:48:53,440 --> 00:48:55,680
Speaker 1: talk about it, I love it. By the way, someone

917
00:48:55,840 --> 00:48:58,319
Speaker 1: um instagram me the other day and said, because of

918
00:48:58,360 --> 00:49:01,200
Speaker 1: Mike's excitement, like I got a man create from a

919
00:49:01,280 --> 00:49:03,680
Speaker 1: husband because he was that excited, And I, oh, no,

920
00:49:03,760 --> 00:49:07,680
Speaker 1: Like yeah, I don't know if everyone feels the same

921
00:49:07,719 --> 00:49:10,320
Speaker 1: way as me, but I had the hardest time finding

922
00:49:10,360 --> 00:49:12,040
Speaker 1: gifts for all the men, for all of us, for

923
00:49:12,080 --> 00:49:17,640
Speaker 1: all of our family members. So every guy has such difference.

924
00:49:18,080 --> 00:49:20,680
Speaker 1: You know, Tay styles sizes all that stuff they like

925
00:49:20,760 --> 00:49:23,359
Speaker 1: to wear and use. But Man Creates ever, has over

926
00:49:23,400 --> 00:49:27,520
Speaker 1: a hundred different types of crates. I mean they have everything,

927
00:49:27,560 --> 00:49:31,279
Speaker 1: exotic meats, turkey grilling, make your own knife, make your

928
00:49:31,280 --> 00:49:34,680
Speaker 1: own chef knife, Zombie Apocalypse, which is a fan favorite

929
00:49:34,680 --> 00:49:40,400
Speaker 1: of mine. Uh sports monogram, you know, beer, beer, muggs, glasses,

930
00:49:41,120 --> 00:49:43,800
Speaker 1: everything you can think of. It's really cool too because

931
00:49:43,800 --> 00:49:45,960
Speaker 1: they're sealed in a wooden crate with a crowbar. So

932
00:49:46,080 --> 00:49:47,839
Speaker 1: Michael I was like, do you feel like a man

933
00:49:47,920 --> 00:49:50,239
Speaker 1: hunting put that crow bar? I was actually feeling less

934
00:49:50,239 --> 00:49:51,520
Speaker 1: of a man for a while because one of them

935
00:49:51,520 --> 00:49:53,480
Speaker 1: took me like forty minutes open. I was having a

936
00:49:53,560 --> 00:49:57,360
Speaker 1: tough time. They extra superglued that one. But part of

937
00:49:57,400 --> 00:49:59,160
Speaker 1: that was still part of the novelty in the process.

938
00:49:59,160 --> 00:50:00,960
Speaker 1: It was. It was a lot of and I enjoy it.

939
00:50:01,000 --> 00:50:03,200
Speaker 1: I know all of our all the male family members

940
00:50:03,200 --> 00:50:05,320
Speaker 1: and our families are gonna love it. Um. It was

941
00:50:05,360 --> 00:50:07,719
Speaker 1: a no brainer. There's one for everyone that we could

942
00:50:07,719 --> 00:50:10,879
Speaker 1: think of. So go get a Man Create for some

943
00:50:11,200 --> 00:50:13,719
Speaker 1: man in your life. Listeners to the show by one

944
00:50:13,719 --> 00:50:15,839
Speaker 1: gift and you'll get the second gift for twenty five

945
00:50:15,920 --> 00:50:18,439
Speaker 1: percent off when you go to man Creates dot Com

946
00:50:18,600 --> 00:50:21,920
Speaker 1: slash Wine w h I n E. This offer is

947
00:50:21,920 --> 00:50:24,239
Speaker 1: only for the holidays. By one gift and get the

948
00:50:24,280 --> 00:50:27,879
Speaker 1: second at man Creates dot Com slash Wine again that's

949
00:50:27,960 --> 00:50:31,480
Speaker 1: man creates dot com slash wine. All right, so Michael

950
00:50:31,480 --> 00:50:33,880
Speaker 1: and I are so excited because we have the beautiful

951
00:50:34,040 --> 00:50:39,640
Speaker 1: Serena Vincent in studio. And you are so tiny for

952
00:50:39,719 --> 00:50:42,120
Speaker 1: being ten weeks away from having a baby. Boy, you

953
00:50:42,160 --> 00:50:48,040
Speaker 1: are so tiny for having the baby six days ago.

954
00:50:45,440 --> 00:50:51,560
Speaker 1: So good. I like to say, I'm taller, So this

955
00:50:51,640 --> 00:50:53,680
Speaker 1: is what my mom tells me. So there's more space

956
00:50:53,760 --> 00:50:56,760
Speaker 1: for it to go. You look beautiful, you know, thank you.

957
00:50:56,680 --> 00:51:00,160
Speaker 1: You look stunning, You're glowing. You and you're ten of

958
00:51:00,160 --> 00:51:03,240
Speaker 1: weeks away. Yeah, I'm ten weeks so hate it's crazy

959
00:51:03,360 --> 00:51:06,160
Speaker 1: or left eight weeks away. I'm thirty two weeks. Yeah,

960
00:51:06,120 --> 00:51:09,040
Speaker 1: that's amazing. I feel great. We were just talking about

961
00:51:09,040 --> 00:51:12,400
Speaker 1: this outside. I feel great now. Um, how's the pregnancy

962
00:51:12,440 --> 00:51:14,880
Speaker 1: been For the first fourteen and a half weeks? I

963
00:51:14,960 --> 00:51:24,040
Speaker 1: had himesis. Yeah, I had to vomiting sickness, I was bedridden.

964
00:51:24,960 --> 00:51:27,799
Speaker 1: So I got somehow I got through life, but I

965
00:51:27,840 --> 00:51:30,839
Speaker 1: don't remember how. I don't need. Did you to get

966
00:51:30,840 --> 00:51:33,759
Speaker 1: ivy s No? I didn't have no, so I was

967
00:51:33,800 --> 00:51:37,319
Speaker 1: not as bad to you, but no, but still it sucks. Yeah,

968
00:51:37,360 --> 00:51:39,840
Speaker 1: it's it's really bad ful. Yeah, and I thought, um,

969
00:51:39,920 --> 00:51:44,080
Speaker 1: when did your's end twenty two weeks? Oh my god? Okay,

970
00:51:44,120 --> 00:51:47,120
Speaker 1: well so mine was mine was fourteen and a half week.

971
00:51:47,160 --> 00:51:49,560
Speaker 1: But still that's it's awful, isn't it. It's awful. But

972
00:51:49,560 --> 00:51:52,439
Speaker 1: it's gone now, it's gone. Now, yeah, it's totally gone.

973
00:51:52,480 --> 00:51:56,319
Speaker 1: It's totally gone. And I can eat food and were

974
00:51:56,320 --> 00:51:59,879
Speaker 1: you with everything was disgusting to you, right, and food

975
00:51:59,880 --> 00:52:04,000
Speaker 1: of everything, everything everything. My husband's just like, okay, yeah,

976
00:52:04,080 --> 00:52:08,480
Speaker 1: I have empathy for your boyfriend because that's I mean,

977
00:52:08,920 --> 00:52:11,640
Speaker 1: an empathy for obviously you guys and you going through it,

978
00:52:11,680 --> 00:52:13,719
Speaker 1: but no one talks about the guy on this end.

979
00:52:13,760 --> 00:52:16,000
Speaker 1: But I have empathy because it's it's hard to see

980
00:52:16,120 --> 00:52:18,759
Speaker 1: your significant other in pain like that and such discomforting

981
00:52:18,840 --> 00:52:20,920
Speaker 1: for him to try to take care of you when

982
00:52:20,920 --> 00:52:23,600
Speaker 1: you're feeling that missable. There's literally nothing that he can do.

983
00:52:23,640 --> 00:52:27,359
Speaker 1: He actually had a broken leg at the time, so

984
00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:31,399
Speaker 1: we were just like this disgusting mess. Like we were

985
00:52:31,760 --> 00:52:35,839
Speaker 1: this disgusting mess just on the couch, like like I

986
00:52:35,880 --> 00:52:38,520
Speaker 1: was puking and I was like trying to help him,

987
00:52:38,600 --> 00:52:40,799
Speaker 1: but like I couldn't make him food because it was

988
00:52:40,880 --> 00:52:44,120
Speaker 1: just it was it was crazy, and we like postmate

989
00:52:44,520 --> 00:52:46,960
Speaker 1: something and then like I tried to eat it and

990
00:52:47,000 --> 00:52:49,840
Speaker 1: then throw it up, and it was just it's just

991
00:52:49,840 --> 00:52:51,880
Speaker 1: so crazy how you forget the feeling because now I

992
00:52:51,920 --> 00:52:53,480
Speaker 1: don't even remember what that feels. No, I know, I

993
00:52:53,520 --> 00:52:56,520
Speaker 1: don't even remember how, you know what I realized what

994
00:52:56,680 --> 00:53:01,160
Speaker 1: I didn't do anything that was like fit fourteen a

995
00:53:01,160 --> 00:53:05,120
Speaker 1: half weeks like, I didn't. After I got through it,

996
00:53:05,200 --> 00:53:07,840
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, there's like a weird stock of

997
00:53:07,920 --> 00:53:16,040
Speaker 1: mail here that I didn't see. We're being evicted from see. Yeah,

998
00:53:16,200 --> 00:53:18,120
Speaker 1: So Serena and I were just talking about the fact

999
00:53:18,200 --> 00:53:20,640
Speaker 1: that she you're doing a doula, so you're like a

1000
00:53:20,680 --> 00:53:26,399
Speaker 1: birthing like in a bath So I'm having my Yes,

1001
00:53:26,440 --> 00:53:29,320
Speaker 1: I'm having a natural birth as long as everything is

1002
00:53:29,360 --> 00:53:32,840
Speaker 1: healthy and continues to be healthy, goes well. So you know,

1003
00:53:33,120 --> 00:53:35,359
Speaker 1: so that means no up, no, but Gerald, no, you're

1004
00:53:35,360 --> 00:53:37,520
Speaker 1: not in a hospital. So I could have my midwife

1005
00:53:37,560 --> 00:53:40,600
Speaker 1: come to my house and and Dola, they could come

1006
00:53:40,600 --> 00:53:42,719
Speaker 1: to your house, or you can choose to do it

1007
00:53:42,760 --> 00:53:47,440
Speaker 1: at a birthing center, which is basically you just you

1008
00:53:47,560 --> 00:53:50,640
Speaker 1: just go to their office and they have a bathtub

1009
00:53:50,680 --> 00:53:53,720
Speaker 1: in a bedroom, in a bed, and you're The cool

1010
00:53:53,760 --> 00:53:58,120
Speaker 1: thing is is that everything. If everything goes you know, well, um,

1011
00:53:58,360 --> 00:54:01,880
Speaker 1: you you're not strapped table, so you're free to labor,

1012
00:54:03,200 --> 00:54:06,600
Speaker 1: moving around and um, eat and drink. You don't have

1013
00:54:06,640 --> 00:54:09,440
Speaker 1: to have an IV you can really, um, you can

1014
00:54:09,480 --> 00:54:13,480
Speaker 1: have all the lights, all your music on, like like

1015
00:54:13,560 --> 00:54:17,440
Speaker 1: your your hero. No, see, I don't think that at all.

1016
00:54:17,600 --> 00:54:20,640
Speaker 1: Like I disagree because I knocking wood, you're so strong.

1017
00:54:20,760 --> 00:54:23,040
Speaker 1: I've never be the epidure, even though it made me crazy.

1018
00:54:23,120 --> 00:54:25,920
Speaker 1: But no, I've never knocking We been in the hospital.

1019
00:54:26,239 --> 00:54:29,160
Speaker 1: Have only been the hospital to like to take care

1020
00:54:29,200 --> 00:54:32,799
Speaker 1: of sick people and family or whatever. So I may

1021
00:54:32,800 --> 00:54:35,560
Speaker 1: to tell you what a contraction feels like. It's like

1022
00:54:35,600 --> 00:54:38,360
Speaker 1: someone stabbing you in the stomach, think with a really

1023
00:54:38,400 --> 00:54:45,200
Speaker 1: sharp knife. Okay, okay, it's right. What if God God

1024
00:54:45,239 --> 00:54:49,600
Speaker 1: forbid anything negative does start to occur? What's the plan

1025
00:54:49,760 --> 00:54:53,359
Speaker 1: if you need Okay? So never the couple that right

1026
00:54:53,400 --> 00:54:56,080
Speaker 1: before they were doing a home birth, because they walked

1027
00:54:56,080 --> 00:54:59,239
Speaker 1: in and she said, and he goes, are you guys,

1028
00:54:59,320 --> 00:55:00,960
Speaker 1: But I didn't say, I have a schedule C section,

1029
00:55:01,040 --> 00:55:04,360
Speaker 1: And then he goes, we try to home birth. The

1030
00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:06,000
Speaker 1: couple of that were right in front of us and

1031
00:55:06,040 --> 00:55:11,000
Speaker 1: we were going to the hospital. But they ended up

1032
00:55:11,040 --> 00:55:14,040
Speaker 1: at the hospital because I think I think she labored

1033
00:55:14,080 --> 00:55:17,680
Speaker 1: too long, is what he had said. That can happen, Um,

1034
00:55:17,719 --> 00:55:21,279
Speaker 1: that that can happen. Um. So right. So, but but

1035
00:55:21,400 --> 00:55:24,920
Speaker 1: there's as you know, there's like time in labor to

1036
00:55:25,080 --> 00:55:28,399
Speaker 1: be like, Okay, this isn't going. You know, this isn't

1037
00:55:28,440 --> 00:55:31,000
Speaker 1: going how we wanted to go. You're not progressing or whatever,

1038
00:55:31,400 --> 00:55:33,960
Speaker 1: and now we need to do these other things. This woman,

1039
00:55:34,000 --> 00:55:38,080
Speaker 1: it's the Natural First Center and UM and right across

1040
00:55:38,080 --> 00:55:41,360
Speaker 1: the street from Theaters and the midwife. Her name is Simona.

1041
00:55:43,160 --> 00:55:46,680
Speaker 1: She's amazing and she's delivered over ten thou babies and

1042
00:55:46,760 --> 00:55:50,440
Speaker 1: all of her grandkids and she's amazing. I just I

1043
00:55:50,600 --> 00:55:52,640
Speaker 1: envy you because I have so much anxiety that that

1044
00:55:52,640 --> 00:55:57,040
Speaker 1: would bring a total crazy amount of anxiety to do that.

1045
00:55:57,080 --> 00:55:59,719
Speaker 1: But it's just I wish I could do that. I

1046
00:55:59,719 --> 00:56:02,440
Speaker 1: wish I could have your just it's going to be beautiful.

1047
00:56:02,600 --> 00:56:06,319
Speaker 1: And but see, like we all have anxiety, right, It's

1048
00:56:06,320 --> 00:56:09,440
Speaker 1: like my anxiety is the hospital. I started off exaters

1049
00:56:09,560 --> 00:56:12,000
Speaker 1: with with an obie and I would I was like

1050
00:56:12,040 --> 00:56:15,640
Speaker 1: in the elevators getting like I would get nervous when

1051
00:56:15,640 --> 00:56:17,319
Speaker 1: I was there, and I didn't like it, and I

1052
00:56:17,360 --> 00:56:19,480
Speaker 1: was like, why do I know all this stuff? And

1053
00:56:19,520 --> 00:56:21,920
Speaker 1: like why do I have I have duelas and midwives

1054
00:56:21,920 --> 00:56:24,480
Speaker 1: and my family, Like why why am I not doing

1055
00:56:24,520 --> 00:56:26,600
Speaker 1: what I want to do? And then I just like

1056
00:56:26,680 --> 00:56:28,800
Speaker 1: laid in bed one night and like went on YELP

1057
00:56:28,920 --> 00:56:32,920
Speaker 1: and found this place and I'm so happy that I

1058
00:56:33,000 --> 00:56:34,960
Speaker 1: that I did. And we were doing like this like

1059
00:56:35,520 --> 00:56:39,399
Speaker 1: hypno birth thing classes and it is sort of like

1060
00:56:40,000 --> 00:56:45,279
Speaker 1: it does feel like very The kind of hypno birth

1061
00:56:45,320 --> 00:56:48,280
Speaker 1: thing is that birth is an extension of your sexuality

1062
00:56:48,480 --> 00:56:50,440
Speaker 1: and of the connection between the two of you, and

1063
00:56:50,480 --> 00:56:54,600
Speaker 1: how how you made your baby is how you're going

1064
00:56:54,640 --> 00:56:59,960
Speaker 1: to get your baby out, so you can because sex

1065
00:57:00,239 --> 00:57:04,239
Speaker 1: doesn't douce labor. Oh my god. So I don't know

1066
00:57:04,320 --> 00:57:07,800
Speaker 1: if that will be happening. We'll see. You're like me,

1067
00:57:13,960 --> 00:57:18,320
Speaker 1: not like active labor, but like like like having like

1068
00:57:18,440 --> 00:57:22,400
Speaker 1: sax and like the baby like not an active labor,

1069
00:57:22,440 --> 00:57:26,520
Speaker 1: but like so it's supposed to be helpful to induce

1070
00:57:26,840 --> 00:57:31,720
Speaker 1: a natural way to induce. So this baby is a miracle,

1071
00:57:31,760 --> 00:57:34,880
Speaker 1: though I think I believe. I mean, so I were

1072
00:57:34,880 --> 00:57:38,200
Speaker 1: told that you couldn't have kids, yes, so this is interesting. Um,

1073
00:57:38,680 --> 00:57:43,360
Speaker 1: it was the same and bless her. She's a wonderful doctor.

1074
00:57:43,920 --> 00:57:46,439
Speaker 1: But um, doctors don't know awesome. So I was going

1075
00:57:46,440 --> 00:57:49,960
Speaker 1: through a divorce. Sorry, I was going through a divorce,

1076
00:57:51,520 --> 00:57:55,200
Speaker 1: and but two sides said sorry, question mark, like we're

1077
00:57:55,240 --> 00:57:59,080
Speaker 1: happy that you're You're good. Yeah, taking you back in

1078
00:57:59,160 --> 00:58:03,440
Speaker 1: the story. I was going through a divorce and I

1079
00:58:03,520 --> 00:58:06,200
Speaker 1: just thought, maybe I should like do that test to

1080
00:58:06,280 --> 00:58:08,240
Speaker 1: see what your numbers are, to see what your levels are,

1081
00:58:08,280 --> 00:58:09,840
Speaker 1: to see if you can get old. Were you at

1082
00:58:09,840 --> 00:58:18,080
Speaker 1: the time MT seven? Um, they're six or seven? And

1083
00:58:18,120 --> 00:58:20,080
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm fine, I can get pregnant in

1084
00:58:20,120 --> 00:58:23,360
Speaker 1: two seconds. And I did that. I took the test,

1085
00:58:24,040 --> 00:58:26,080
Speaker 1: and then I was on the pilot. I was shooting

1086
00:58:26,120 --> 00:58:28,880
Speaker 1: the pilot of a Disney show that I just that

1087
00:58:29,000 --> 00:58:31,880
Speaker 1: we just wrapped stuck in the middle where I play

1088
00:58:31,920 --> 00:58:33,960
Speaker 1: a mom of seven kids. Oh my gosh, and so

1089
00:58:33,960 --> 00:58:35,640
Speaker 1: the first time I've ever been able to play a

1090
00:58:35,680 --> 00:58:38,320
Speaker 1: mom at all. And then the role was like really

1091
00:58:38,360 --> 00:58:40,760
Speaker 1: special to me. So I'm on the side of the pilot.

1092
00:58:40,800 --> 00:58:45,320
Speaker 1: It's lunchtime, and my doctor calls and she said, um,

1093
00:58:45,440 --> 00:58:49,680
Speaker 1: we got your tests back. We need to aggressively try

1094
00:58:49,720 --> 00:58:53,520
Speaker 1: to get you pregnant right now or you need to

1095
00:58:53,520 --> 00:58:56,480
Speaker 1: freeze your eggs because you probably won't be able to

1096
00:58:56,520 --> 00:58:59,680
Speaker 1: have kids in the next year too because of your eggcount,

1097
00:59:00,000 --> 00:59:02,840
Speaker 1: because because of yeah, the numbers and your fs F

1098
00:59:02,960 --> 00:59:08,200
Speaker 1: s H levels and all that stuff. And I was like, aggressively,

1099
00:59:08,200 --> 00:59:14,240
Speaker 1: try to get me pregnant right now with who? And so,

1100
00:59:14,960 --> 00:59:17,200
Speaker 1: you know, at the time, I was like I wasn't

1101
00:59:17,240 --> 00:59:19,760
Speaker 1: fully divorced, but we had been severy long enough that

1102
00:59:19,880 --> 00:59:21,920
Speaker 1: you know, I was dating, and it's like I'm just

1103
00:59:21,920 --> 00:59:25,640
Speaker 1: supposed to like pick somebody, you know, and now, and

1104
00:59:25,680 --> 00:59:29,120
Speaker 1: then you turn into the crazy lady. It's like iraduating

1105
00:59:29,440 --> 00:59:35,160
Speaker 1: you know, friend in dating, you know, And it really

1106
00:59:35,200 --> 00:59:39,800
Speaker 1: messed with my head. So I went to UM. She

1107
00:59:39,920 --> 00:59:44,439
Speaker 1: referred me to a fertility clinic, and I went through

1108
00:59:44,480 --> 00:59:47,000
Speaker 1: this whole process, and I went to these seminars and

1109
00:59:47,040 --> 00:59:49,840
Speaker 1: I went to this doctor and they they give you this,

1110
00:59:49,880 --> 00:59:52,440
Speaker 1: they give you that, and they do a transvaginal you know,

1111
00:59:52,880 --> 00:59:55,040
Speaker 1: ultrasound and then you know, on a certain day of

1112
00:59:55,040 --> 00:59:58,280
Speaker 1: your cycle and count how many follicles you have. And

1113
00:59:58,320 --> 01:00:01,680
Speaker 1: then then he was like, yeah, you these are your numbers.

1114
01:00:01,720 --> 01:00:03,960
Speaker 1: This is what this is. You're probably not going to

1115
01:00:04,040 --> 01:00:05,840
Speaker 1: be able to conceive naturally. This is what you need

1116
01:00:05,880 --> 01:00:07,960
Speaker 1: to do. You need to freeze your eggs. And then

1117
01:00:08,000 --> 01:00:13,880
Speaker 1: I realized I learned that freezing an egg has only

1118
01:00:13,920 --> 01:00:16,840
Speaker 1: an eleven percent chance of becoming a baby. We've done

1119
01:00:16,880 --> 01:00:19,440
Speaker 1: IVF twice, so you know all these things, but I

1120
01:00:19,440 --> 01:00:21,440
Speaker 1: didn't know that fact though, So say that again. So

1121
01:00:21,800 --> 01:00:25,440
Speaker 1: freezing an eggs only only has an eleven percent chance

1122
01:00:25,520 --> 01:00:28,960
Speaker 1: of being a baby. Freezing an embryo, which is what

1123
01:00:29,000 --> 01:00:32,040
Speaker 1: you did, has a lot. There's a lot of success there.

1124
01:00:32,680 --> 01:00:34,880
Speaker 1: So I was like, what it didn't work for us?

1125
01:00:34,880 --> 01:00:37,440
Speaker 1: Though it didn't. These are both that you end up

1126
01:00:37,440 --> 01:00:43,480
Speaker 1: getting after both babies came out a month after. If

1127
01:00:44,800 --> 01:00:46,760
Speaker 1: that's miracles, I don't know if I needed like some

1128
01:00:46,840 --> 01:00:53,880
Speaker 1: of the medicines from but continue, Oh my god, that's beautiful.

1129
01:00:53,880 --> 01:00:56,200
Speaker 1: Well it's very it's the same, it's like the same story.

1130
01:00:56,360 --> 01:01:00,800
Speaker 1: Um so I well then I then then I was

1131
01:01:00,840 --> 01:01:06,320
Speaker 1: like that statistically doesn't make sense, and they said, you're right,

1132
01:01:07,080 --> 01:01:10,000
Speaker 1: Um then you should. You should. Your your odds are

1133
01:01:10,040 --> 01:01:12,280
Speaker 1: better if you freeze an embryo, and like, well, like

1134
01:01:12,720 --> 01:01:15,520
Speaker 1: when I need sperm for that? And he literally handed

1135
01:01:15,560 --> 01:01:19,400
Speaker 1: me a bind durst and I like that's broke down

1136
01:01:19,440 --> 01:01:25,640
Speaker 1: into yours. And I was like, like, like a romantic

1137
01:01:26,040 --> 01:01:31,720
Speaker 1: not nothing against that. Open it. You didn't push it

1138
01:01:31,840 --> 01:01:33,560
Speaker 1: right back. I would love to see that there be

1139
01:01:33,680 --> 01:01:38,400
Speaker 1: like h that guy. Yeah we could and there are

1140
01:01:38,720 --> 01:01:40,560
Speaker 1: a lot of women to do this, and obviously it's

1141
01:01:40,560 --> 01:01:44,800
Speaker 1: a beautiful thing and it works for many people. Yeah,

1142
01:01:45,680 --> 01:01:49,040
Speaker 1: but where just who I am and where I was

1143
01:01:49,120 --> 01:01:54,440
Speaker 1: at the time, it broke my heart and well to

1144
01:01:54,520 --> 01:01:56,640
Speaker 1: be especially because you want to be a mother, so

1145
01:01:56,720 --> 01:01:58,800
Speaker 1: you're told that you can't be mother. It's like there's

1146
01:01:58,840 --> 01:02:00,400
Speaker 1: so many women out there, they don't even want to

1147
01:02:00,400 --> 01:02:02,680
Speaker 1: be moms. I have kids and we're like I want

1148
01:02:02,720 --> 01:02:04,439
Speaker 1: to be a mother, Like I'm my purpose on life

1149
01:02:04,480 --> 01:02:06,320
Speaker 1: is to be a mother, and that you're told no,

1150
01:02:06,480 --> 01:02:08,360
Speaker 1: it's like it's that's heartbreaking, right, And then which was

1151
01:02:08,520 --> 01:02:11,360
Speaker 1: And it's also like you know, hundreds of thousands of

1152
01:02:11,400 --> 01:02:13,479
Speaker 1: dollars and all of this stuff. And I was like

1153
01:02:14,120 --> 01:02:17,000
Speaker 1: at the time, I was like I said, I was

1154
01:02:17,040 --> 01:02:18,840
Speaker 1: going through a divorce and I was, which makes it

1155
01:02:18,960 --> 01:02:21,160
Speaker 1: I was sort of like the setting my whole life

1156
01:02:21,400 --> 01:02:26,600
Speaker 1: and like I feel like the universe, God, whatever you

1157
01:02:26,600 --> 01:02:28,440
Speaker 1: wanna call I was like, all right, we're going to

1158
01:02:28,520 --> 01:02:32,960
Speaker 1: take everything away from you. Until you get divorced and

1159
01:02:33,000 --> 01:02:35,800
Speaker 1: then we'll put it all back together. So like I was,

1160
01:02:35,960 --> 01:02:37,840
Speaker 1: I was doing the pilot for Stuck in the Medal,

1161
01:02:37,880 --> 01:02:38,960
Speaker 1: but I didn't know if it was going to get

1162
01:02:39,000 --> 01:02:41,680
Speaker 1: picked up. I was waiting tables. I was like back

1163
01:02:41,720 --> 01:02:45,240
Speaker 1: waiting tables. I was like waiting on Jamie Pressley, who

1164
01:02:45,240 --> 01:02:48,120
Speaker 1: I was in not another team movie with. And that's

1165
01:02:48,120 --> 01:02:50,000
Speaker 1: a real story. And this is the first time I've

1166
01:02:50,000 --> 01:02:54,200
Speaker 1: said this on It's so cool. On. I was, you know,

1167
01:02:54,200 --> 01:02:56,560
Speaker 1: I was still working, but I was like trying to

1168
01:02:57,000 --> 01:02:59,560
Speaker 1: keep my life together. So I was like, this isn't

1169
01:02:59,680 --> 01:03:02,960
Speaker 1: this isn't going to work. This is I can't I'm

1170
01:03:02,960 --> 01:03:04,840
Speaker 1: not freezing and every I'm not freezing as I can't

1171
01:03:04,840 --> 01:03:09,040
Speaker 1: afford it. I can't. I'm just, um, I'm just going

1172
01:03:09,120 --> 01:03:11,000
Speaker 1: to choose to not believe that this is even real.

1173
01:03:12,360 --> 01:03:16,560
Speaker 1: And I I sort of battled that um And for

1174
01:03:16,600 --> 01:03:20,320
Speaker 1: the next few years it did make dating and that

1175
01:03:20,640 --> 01:03:25,880
Speaker 1: tricky because I had this fear in me um that

1176
01:03:26,120 --> 01:03:28,680
Speaker 1: one and the countdown too, like ever going to be

1177
01:03:28,720 --> 01:03:32,800
Speaker 1: a mom Yeah, So UM, I just sort of like

1178
01:03:34,000 --> 01:03:38,160
Speaker 1: let it go and I wanted to try UM with

1179
01:03:38,200 --> 01:03:40,200
Speaker 1: my boyfriend. Now. I was like, how long have you

1180
01:03:40,200 --> 01:03:45,880
Speaker 1: been with your boyfriend? We've been together, Um, one day.

1181
01:03:47,560 --> 01:03:53,440
Speaker 1: It's um, it's a long, complicated story. But love company here.

1182
01:03:53,520 --> 01:03:59,120
Speaker 1: That's a whole long story. Yeah, it's it's a it's

1183
01:03:59,120 --> 01:04:02,800
Speaker 1: a good story. Is gonna get married? Um? Probably yeah,

1184
01:04:02,800 --> 01:04:05,520
Speaker 1: but I feel like it all there's so much happening that, like,

1185
01:04:06,440 --> 01:04:09,000
Speaker 1: and having been married, I don't feel like I need

1186
01:04:09,040 --> 01:04:11,280
Speaker 1: to do that before we have the baby. Also, like,

1187
01:04:12,240 --> 01:04:15,840
Speaker 1: so you guys were actively trying that we were not

1188
01:04:15,840 --> 01:04:19,560
Speaker 1: not trying. Yeah, And then I was like, I want

1189
01:04:19,560 --> 01:04:21,200
Speaker 1: to try to have a baby and he was like,

1190
01:04:21,280 --> 01:04:27,680
Speaker 1: oh yeah, we just hadn't gotten there yet. And um

1191
01:04:27,840 --> 01:04:34,600
Speaker 1: my show ended and um we went to Italy for

1192
01:04:34,640 --> 01:04:38,320
Speaker 1: five days and I made a wish in the Trevy

1193
01:04:38,320 --> 01:04:42,520
Speaker 1: Fountain room. Stop you want to get pregnant? Fled a row.

1194
01:04:43,440 --> 01:04:46,240
Speaker 1: I ate a ton of pasta, and why, like the

1195
01:04:46,320 --> 01:04:52,000
Speaker 1: time of our lives and pregnant? Did you the whole time?

1196
01:04:52,040 --> 01:04:55,160
Speaker 1: Did you mentally, even with all these hurdles medically in

1197
01:04:55,200 --> 01:04:57,000
Speaker 1: front of you, did you just still just believe that

1198
01:04:57,040 --> 01:05:00,640
Speaker 1: it was possible? I didn't, Like, I just like made

1199
01:05:00,680 --> 01:05:04,240
Speaker 1: a very clear decision that I am not going to

1200
01:05:04,400 --> 01:05:07,360
Speaker 1: believe that I can't get pregnant naturally until I actively

1201
01:05:07,400 --> 01:05:13,840
Speaker 1: try and and then I've since heard many a lot

1202
01:05:13,880 --> 01:05:17,040
Speaker 1: of stories of women that are around the same age

1203
01:05:17,200 --> 01:05:20,800
Speaker 1: seven that their doctors are scaring them and telling them

1204
01:05:20,840 --> 01:05:22,400
Speaker 1: they might not be able to get pregnant, and then

1205
01:05:22,400 --> 01:05:25,360
Speaker 1: they go through all of this stuff and it's like

1206
01:05:25,360 --> 01:05:29,200
Speaker 1: they haven't even tried. Well. I will say, though, to

1207
01:05:29,880 --> 01:05:33,400
Speaker 1: act as a medical people, they they after thirty five,

1208
01:05:33,440 --> 01:05:36,440
Speaker 1: I mean, your number does diminish huge. Like my girlfriend

1209
01:05:36,520 --> 01:05:38,480
Speaker 1: was going to freeze your eggs. She went in at

1210
01:05:38,520 --> 01:05:41,680
Speaker 1: thirty four, she had, you know, a plenty of eggs.

1211
01:05:42,240 --> 01:05:44,600
Speaker 1: She went back thirty five and a half, she had

1212
01:05:44,640 --> 01:05:47,959
Speaker 1: like six eggs and there wasn't no point to free

1213
01:05:48,000 --> 01:05:51,680
Speaker 1: because they're going to be gone, so I mean almost nothing.

1214
01:05:51,960 --> 01:05:55,600
Speaker 1: So it's just drastically dropped. So that's why I you know,

1215
01:05:56,400 --> 01:05:59,400
Speaker 1: But at the same time, again, if you just never know.

1216
01:06:00,040 --> 01:06:02,320
Speaker 1: But I mean, look what happened. That's some miracles of

1217
01:06:02,600 --> 01:06:05,280
Speaker 1: childbirth and life in itself. I just but I loved

1218
01:06:05,760 --> 01:06:09,400
Speaker 1: and you hate the playing god thing too, Yeah, yeah,

1219
01:06:09,480 --> 01:06:15,640
Speaker 1: but I love Serena's your optimism and decision to not

1220
01:06:15,880 --> 01:06:18,600
Speaker 1: believe that yet even though you were told. I still

1221
01:06:18,640 --> 01:06:21,200
Speaker 1: think the mind is a powerful thing if you just

1222
01:06:21,320 --> 01:06:24,240
Speaker 1: if you're optimistic. Now, if you just sit there and

1223
01:06:24,760 --> 01:06:26,960
Speaker 1: not proactive and just believe, oh, this will happen to me,

1224
01:06:27,040 --> 01:06:29,040
Speaker 1: you still got to do something about it. But the

1225
01:06:29,080 --> 01:06:32,760
Speaker 1: fact that you actively try with your boyfriend, you're optimistic

1226
01:06:32,800 --> 01:06:34,720
Speaker 1: that you weren't going to let the door shut on you.

1227
01:06:34,760 --> 01:06:36,520
Speaker 1: I think there's something to be said for that. I

1228
01:06:36,560 --> 01:06:39,480
Speaker 1: love that. I love that aspect of Sure. Yeah, it's

1229
01:06:39,480 --> 01:06:42,360
Speaker 1: a great way to obviously see things, especially because most

1230
01:06:42,400 --> 01:06:44,680
Speaker 1: of them would be like the stress put so much

1231
01:06:44,720 --> 01:06:46,760
Speaker 1: stress themselves. Then you can't get pregnant because you're stressed.

1232
01:06:47,160 --> 01:06:48,400
Speaker 1: To me, if you're thinking the whole time, I'm not

1233
01:06:48,440 --> 01:06:49,680
Speaker 1: gonna be able to get pregn I'm not gonna be

1234
01:06:49,680 --> 01:06:51,720
Speaker 1: able to get pregnant, then you're just telling yourself your

1235
01:06:51,720 --> 01:06:53,600
Speaker 1: body is not going to react. If you're it's so

1236
01:06:53,640 --> 01:06:56,480
Speaker 1: much easier done. No, I believe that. But but it's

1237
01:06:56,520 --> 01:06:58,400
Speaker 1: more than just that. It's in life in general, with

1238
01:06:58,560 --> 01:07:01,520
Speaker 1: things you want to accomplish or whatever. It's things that

1239
01:07:01,520 --> 01:07:02,800
Speaker 1: you want to do in your life. If you're just

1240
01:07:02,920 --> 01:07:05,000
Speaker 1: if you sit there and doubt yourself the entire time,

1241
01:07:05,440 --> 01:07:09,000
Speaker 1: of course, nothing's going to happen. You doubt yourself. I

1242
01:07:09,360 --> 01:07:12,200
Speaker 1: totally I totally agree. Yeah, you're putting like you're sending

1243
01:07:12,240 --> 01:07:14,760
Speaker 1: conflicting messages out there. I want to try to get pregnant,

1244
01:07:14,760 --> 01:07:16,320
Speaker 1: but I don't think I can, you know, And I

1245
01:07:16,360 --> 01:07:18,960
Speaker 1: tried to. I did battle it and like it was

1246
01:07:19,360 --> 01:07:23,000
Speaker 1: like it was it's a battle. And then I came

1247
01:07:23,000 --> 01:07:27,919
Speaker 1: to the decision if I can't get pregnant naturally, then

1248
01:07:29,000 --> 01:07:33,400
Speaker 1: then that's okay. And then I got there. Then I

1249
01:07:33,440 --> 01:07:35,919
Speaker 1: get to be a mother in like this different way.

1250
01:07:36,040 --> 01:07:38,480
Speaker 1: Like I've got kids from all over the world that

1251
01:07:38,560 --> 01:07:41,840
Speaker 1: are like I wish you were my mom, you know,

1252
01:07:42,080 --> 01:07:44,800
Speaker 1: in like all different countries and languages and everything, just

1253
01:07:44,920 --> 01:07:50,800
Speaker 1: being a TV mom and um, I have a huge family,

1254
01:07:50,920 --> 01:07:53,560
Speaker 1: and I you know, there's there is um there is

1255
01:07:53,600 --> 01:07:55,840
Speaker 1: no limit on like the love we have or the

1256
01:07:55,880 --> 01:07:59,800
Speaker 1: love we can give. And look at you now anyway, Letty,

1257
01:08:00,440 --> 01:08:03,560
Speaker 1: you're ten weeks away from having a baby boy, so exciting.

1258
01:08:03,840 --> 01:08:06,200
Speaker 1: Are you and your boyfriend lived together? Yes? Okay, yes,

1259
01:08:06,320 --> 01:08:10,920
Speaker 1: you have names like going back and forth. We're going

1260
01:08:10,960 --> 01:08:15,000
Speaker 1: back and forth. So I don't want to say my mind.

1261
01:08:15,400 --> 01:08:17,000
Speaker 1: What do you name your baby boy? His name is

1262
01:08:17,080 --> 01:08:23,040
Speaker 1: Jason Ja. It means healing, He's been very healing for us. Yeah,

1263
01:08:23,400 --> 01:08:26,720
Speaker 1: he's fantastic. We do have two babies. We have a

1264
01:08:26,880 --> 01:08:29,160
Speaker 1: three almost three year old little girl, the three year

1265
01:08:29,200 --> 01:08:33,120
Speaker 1: little girl. So did IVF and then it didn't take.

1266
01:08:33,200 --> 01:08:35,439
Speaker 1: It didn't take, and then the next month got pregnant

1267
01:08:35,439 --> 01:08:37,599
Speaker 1: with Jolie. Did IVF again because we had an embryo

1268
01:08:37,680 --> 01:08:41,760
Speaker 1: leftover from the first round, and we got pregnant. But

1269
01:08:41,880 --> 01:08:44,320
Speaker 1: every time I would get pregnant, I got. I got

1270
01:08:44,400 --> 01:08:46,519
Speaker 1: pregnant both times with the IVF, but then lost it

1271
01:08:47,280 --> 01:08:50,400
Speaker 1: very soon. It was chemical com so, but then the

1272
01:08:50,439 --> 01:08:56,639
Speaker 1: next month I'd get pregnant. Yeah, so that extra little

1273
01:08:56,880 --> 01:09:00,519
Speaker 1: dose of hormone or whatever. Then, yeah, I did. Being

1274
01:09:00,560 --> 01:09:02,800
Speaker 1: on Stuck in the Middle, which has been a hit show,

1275
01:09:03,360 --> 01:09:07,680
Speaker 1: you and for Disney. Being on that, did that, you know,

1276
01:09:07,840 --> 01:09:09,840
Speaker 1: increase your urge to want to be a mom or

1277
01:09:09,880 --> 01:09:11,559
Speaker 1: is it were you the same like you always wanted

1278
01:09:11,600 --> 01:09:12,960
Speaker 1: to be a mom no matter what, Or is just

1279
01:09:13,000 --> 01:09:15,000
Speaker 1: being that mom role and being around kids where you like,

1280
01:09:15,040 --> 01:09:17,160
Speaker 1: I have to be a mom. I've always wanted to

1281
01:09:17,200 --> 01:09:19,800
Speaker 1: be a mom since I was a baby. You know,

1282
01:09:21,680 --> 01:09:26,840
Speaker 1: since I was a baby, I wanted a baby. Um um.

1283
01:09:27,040 --> 01:09:31,599
Speaker 1: Being on that show, I had no idea like how

1284
01:09:32,040 --> 01:09:35,559
Speaker 1: trans it was transformative. It really was like I really

1285
01:09:35,960 --> 01:09:39,559
Speaker 1: like I love those kids. I still love them and

1286
01:09:39,600 --> 01:09:42,559
Speaker 1: they and like we weirdly feel like a family. And

1287
01:09:44,560 --> 01:09:47,840
Speaker 1: so it didn't necessarily want to make me want them

1288
01:09:47,880 --> 01:09:51,280
Speaker 1: even more. It just, um it filled my heart in

1289
01:09:51,439 --> 01:09:54,960
Speaker 1: like this other way that I didn't realize could happen.

1290
01:09:55,920 --> 01:10:03,040
Speaker 1: Um at a job, you know. Um so and all

1291
01:10:03,080 --> 01:10:04,599
Speaker 1: the kids were like you have to be a mom,

1292
01:10:04,680 --> 01:10:07,920
Speaker 1: like you have to give the best. Yeah. And then

1293
01:10:07,960 --> 01:10:10,240
Speaker 1: you like hear the needs you know from the doctor,

1294
01:10:10,280 --> 01:10:13,920
Speaker 1: and you're like it was a weird thing. And then

1295
01:10:13,960 --> 01:10:16,680
Speaker 1: they all call me mom, like on set it was

1296
01:10:16,800 --> 01:10:20,519
Speaker 1: a weird moment in my life that I was shooting

1297
01:10:20,520 --> 01:10:23,640
Speaker 1: this pilot and they were like mom, mom, And my

1298
01:10:23,760 --> 01:10:28,439
Speaker 1: Dactor's like, you know, yeah we did three seasons. Seasons

1299
01:10:28,920 --> 01:10:34,800
Speaker 1: that's awesome. Yeah. Um this little guy I know. At

1300
01:10:34,880 --> 01:10:37,160
Speaker 1: all time, I'm like I can't really audition right now

1301
01:10:37,200 --> 01:10:38,840
Speaker 1: because I got I had a baby, Yeah all right,

1302
01:10:38,880 --> 01:10:41,160
Speaker 1: I have a baby in my billy. So um, I

1303
01:10:41,200 --> 01:10:46,959
Speaker 1: was hiding and quite a few auditions after the show wrapped,

1304
01:10:47,920 --> 01:10:50,479
Speaker 1: and I was like pinned for like all these different things,

1305
01:10:50,520 --> 01:10:52,360
Speaker 1: and then it just came down to It was like, wow,

1306
01:10:52,439 --> 01:10:55,400
Speaker 1: I can't really you know, you know, I was just

1307
01:10:55,439 --> 01:10:58,040
Speaker 1: do a movie in Thailand and November and that's not

1308
01:10:58,320 --> 01:11:04,080
Speaker 1: that's not. So what's your biggest issue with your boyfriend?

1309
01:11:04,120 --> 01:11:06,000
Speaker 1: Because we like to talk about our issues on the show.

1310
01:11:07,040 --> 01:11:08,439
Speaker 1: So what do you what do you guys usually fight

1311
01:11:08,479 --> 01:11:12,400
Speaker 1: about the most? I wish he was here because we

1312
01:11:12,479 --> 01:11:14,840
Speaker 1: just we just got into an argument about the holidays,

1313
01:11:15,040 --> 01:11:17,120
Speaker 1: um with a therapist on the line before you came in.

1314
01:11:17,200 --> 01:11:22,120
Speaker 1: So interesting. UM, but I'm curious, Well, tell us that

1315
01:11:22,200 --> 01:11:26,720
Speaker 1: you guys fight too. Oh yeah, we had. We had

1316
01:11:26,760 --> 01:11:32,680
Speaker 1: a holiday fight. Yeah. Yeah, his families in Oregon, and um,

1317
01:11:32,960 --> 01:11:35,760
Speaker 1: our plan was to go up there, drive up there.

1318
01:11:35,760 --> 01:11:39,360
Speaker 1: It's like ten twelve hours for Thanksgiving, and I was

1319
01:11:39,439 --> 01:11:45,080
Speaker 1: cooking and all of these things, and he was like

1320
01:11:45,200 --> 01:11:46,640
Speaker 1: leading up to it, I was like, okay, all right,

1321
01:11:46,680 --> 01:11:48,360
Speaker 1: so we have to like figure all this out right,

1322
01:11:48,360 --> 01:11:50,280
Speaker 1: like like what like we need to make sure that

1323
01:11:50,439 --> 01:11:52,719
Speaker 1: we can get like the turkey that I want, which

1324
01:11:52,760 --> 01:11:55,639
Speaker 1: is like an organic whatever turkey and in this small town,

1325
01:11:55,760 --> 01:12:00,400
Speaker 1: like we're gonna get and like and we need to

1326
01:12:00,400 --> 01:12:02,040
Speaker 1: pack this and that we don't have all of the

1327
01:12:02,120 --> 01:12:04,040
Speaker 1: things to make things giving to we need to like

1328
01:12:04,040 --> 01:12:06,639
Speaker 1: pack like a platter, and like you're trying to per

1329
01:12:06,800 --> 01:12:08,880
Speaker 1: and like I'm trying to like and he's just like

1330
01:12:09,640 --> 01:12:13,479
Speaker 1: to do like on another like not and and at

1331
01:12:13,479 --> 01:12:15,599
Speaker 1: one point a couple of times he was like, oh god,

1332
01:12:15,600 --> 01:12:17,640
Speaker 1: I don't even want to go up there. We had

1333
01:12:17,680 --> 01:12:19,479
Speaker 1: to go up there for something else, and then like

1334
01:12:20,360 --> 01:12:22,760
Speaker 1: that didn't happen, and and then he was sort of

1335
01:12:22,800 --> 01:12:24,639
Speaker 1: like he said a few times, he's like I don't

1336
01:12:24,600 --> 01:12:28,360
Speaker 1: even really want to go. I think I want to

1337
01:12:28,400 --> 01:12:32,200
Speaker 1: drive to all hours. Pregnant, right and cooked your family

1338
01:12:32,360 --> 01:12:34,759
Speaker 1: figure all this out? So you are you are frustrated

1339
01:12:34,760 --> 01:12:36,720
Speaker 1: that he wasn't being president, and he also wasn't being

1340
01:12:37,120 --> 01:12:39,560
Speaker 1: helpful with it. Was like the night before and we

1341
01:12:40,000 --> 01:12:41,720
Speaker 1: had to go to some work event and it was

1342
01:12:41,880 --> 01:12:45,479
Speaker 1: midnight the night before we were leaving and we weren't packed.

1343
01:12:45,720 --> 01:12:49,680
Speaker 1: All this stuff wasn't figured out, nothing was organized, and

1344
01:12:49,680 --> 01:12:51,160
Speaker 1: and I was like, let's go to bed, and he

1345
01:12:51,200 --> 01:12:52,960
Speaker 1: was like no, I thought we'd watch and I was like,

1346
01:12:53,000 --> 01:13:01,559
Speaker 1: we're not watching anything, no wet And it was fine,

1347
01:13:01,600 --> 01:13:03,240
Speaker 1: but I was like, nothing that's done, and I've been

1348
01:13:03,280 --> 01:13:04,680
Speaker 1: thinking about it. Where are you thinking about it? This

1349
01:13:04,760 --> 01:13:06,599
Speaker 1: is your family, Like you have to help me think

1350
01:13:06,600 --> 01:13:09,120
Speaker 1: about these things, like we're you know, I can't even

1351
01:13:09,680 --> 01:13:12,680
Speaker 1: get the platter down from up there. Yeah, when are

1352
01:13:12,720 --> 01:13:14,720
Speaker 1: you going to do it? I think that's a man thing.

1353
01:13:14,760 --> 01:13:17,559
Speaker 1: Men just don't. Well, I'll say you're a really great planner,

1354
01:13:18,000 --> 01:13:21,240
Speaker 1: But I feel I feel as if sometimes guys don't

1355
01:13:21,280 --> 01:13:24,960
Speaker 1: have the because we're we're ten steps ahead of them,

1356
01:13:25,040 --> 01:13:29,160
Speaker 1: you know, so they don't have the Your timelines are

1357
01:13:29,240 --> 01:13:32,120
Speaker 1: usually sooner than ours. Granted the night before he should

1358
01:13:32,120 --> 01:13:37,320
Speaker 1: have been like, all right, let's let's grant out. He's like, oh,

1359
01:13:37,400 --> 01:13:40,360
Speaker 1: I can pack in twenty minutes. I said, well, I

1360
01:13:40,400 --> 01:13:43,000
Speaker 1: can't pack into it. I also like, I've had this

1361
01:13:43,080 --> 01:13:46,599
Speaker 1: weird like pelvis hip issue, so it's so much better today,

1362
01:13:46,680 --> 01:13:50,120
Speaker 1: and um, but I've had to see a chiropractor throughout

1363
01:13:50,160 --> 01:13:53,559
Speaker 1: my pregnancy, and there have been weeks where I can't

1364
01:13:53,560 --> 01:13:56,360
Speaker 1: walk at all and I've been limping and and it's

1365
01:13:56,479 --> 01:14:00,160
Speaker 1: very painful. And this was one of those weeks were

1366
01:14:00,200 --> 01:14:03,760
Speaker 1: like I couldn't, Like I literally couldn't been down, couldn't. Yeah.

1367
01:14:03,800 --> 01:14:05,040
Speaker 1: I was like, well, I'm glad that you can pack

1368
01:14:05,120 --> 01:14:07,920
Speaker 1: in twenty minutes. Yeah, but I can't move. I can't,

1369
01:14:08,439 --> 01:14:11,560
Speaker 1: so who's packing my bag. So for the baby, you

1370
01:14:11,600 --> 01:14:13,280
Speaker 1: don't have to set some real good boundaries with us.

1371
01:14:13,680 --> 01:14:14,880
Speaker 1: And you know what I did with Mike. I'll say

1372
01:14:14,880 --> 01:14:17,160
Speaker 1: I'll give him a list, and I'll say this by

1373
01:14:17,600 --> 01:14:21,080
Speaker 1: tuesday or by next week. You know, certain things I

1374
01:14:21,160 --> 01:14:23,960
Speaker 1: need him to get done around the house because I

1375
01:14:24,000 --> 01:14:26,639
Speaker 1: have because if not, I would get them all done today.

1376
01:14:26,760 --> 01:14:28,800
Speaker 1: But again I don't, or I'd get mad at him

1377
01:14:28,800 --> 01:14:30,640
Speaker 1: if he doesn't do it today. But if there's a

1378
01:14:30,680 --> 01:14:33,679
Speaker 1: timeline in my head where I said, okay, you break

1379
01:14:33,720 --> 01:14:36,800
Speaker 1: down the boxes by the end of the month, he's great,

1380
01:14:36,840 --> 01:14:38,920
Speaker 1: you know, So at least he gets a timeline too,

1381
01:14:39,040 --> 01:14:42,200
Speaker 1: and then I don't get frustrated that they're not done yesterday, right,

1382
01:14:42,280 --> 01:14:44,439
Speaker 1: even though I would have done a yesterday. Yeah, yes,

1383
01:14:45,040 --> 01:14:47,880
Speaker 1: you know, we can't. We actually can't do everything. And

1384
01:14:49,080 --> 01:14:52,200
Speaker 1: brought up an interesting topic on the following week's show,

1385
01:14:52,320 --> 01:14:56,680
Speaker 1: I'm so curious about your fight. I brought up the

1386
01:14:56,680 --> 01:15:00,439
Speaker 1: concept of why don't men ever give their wives honey

1387
01:15:00,479 --> 01:15:03,880
Speaker 1: to do with? And I amost slap him, yeah, and

1388
01:15:04,160 --> 01:15:08,200
Speaker 1: she kind of like, are you Yeah, So I kind

1389
01:15:08,200 --> 01:15:12,240
Speaker 1: of lost that cute because you'll you'll find out, Yeah,

1390
01:15:12,320 --> 01:15:14,160
Speaker 1: you'll find out that when you have the baby, your

1391
01:15:14,200 --> 01:15:16,800
Speaker 1: your husband's never gonna change out the clothes, but that

1392
01:15:16,840 --> 01:15:19,439
Speaker 1: they overgrew, that they would overgrow or is that the

1393
01:15:19,520 --> 01:15:22,280
Speaker 1: right grew or I mean just any of those things.

1394
01:15:22,320 --> 01:15:24,360
Speaker 1: I mean we just we or the dentist or the

1395
01:15:24,400 --> 01:15:27,640
Speaker 1: appointments or you just we just do it, mean you

1396
01:15:27,640 --> 01:15:29,200
Speaker 1: just do them like yeah, but because we have the

1397
01:15:29,280 --> 01:15:31,320
Speaker 1: sense to like you don't have the urgency to do

1398
01:15:31,360 --> 01:15:33,240
Speaker 1: any of those things. Yeah, it's it's not that we

1399
01:15:33,680 --> 01:15:36,800
Speaker 1: don't think of them. It's just like your timeline that

1400
01:15:36,840 --> 01:15:39,080
Speaker 1: you just get it down before we Well, thank god,

1401
01:15:39,120 --> 01:15:42,280
Speaker 1: because Jason's nursery would have been you know, for example,

1402
01:15:42,400 --> 01:15:43,720
Speaker 1: I said, honey, would you like me to show you

1403
01:15:43,720 --> 01:15:45,519
Speaker 1: around Jason's nursery and let you know where all the

1404
01:15:45,520 --> 01:15:48,519
Speaker 1: things are. And he's like, I'll show you. He's like,

1405
01:15:48,520 --> 01:15:50,439
Speaker 1: all right, it's over here. Either I go, nope, that's

1406
01:15:50,439 --> 01:15:54,240
Speaker 1: actually not where the newborn are. Okay, something came in.

1407
01:15:54,640 --> 01:15:56,080
Speaker 1: Any time something came to the house, I had to

1408
01:15:56,080 --> 01:15:58,200
Speaker 1: go in the nursery. She'd get it, open the box,

1409
01:15:58,360 --> 01:16:00,400
Speaker 1: take up the tags, wash her clothes, put it because

1410
01:16:00,400 --> 01:16:02,800
Speaker 1: I don't want to do like five loads of of

1411
01:16:02,800 --> 01:16:05,920
Speaker 1: of laundry two weeks before the baby's it's smart. I

1412
01:16:06,080 --> 01:16:09,080
Speaker 1: guess who doesn't have a nursery yet? Yeah, yeah, it's

1413
01:16:09,120 --> 01:16:10,800
Speaker 1: your has and hasn't I mean your boyfriend hasn't not.

1414
01:16:11,520 --> 01:16:16,360
Speaker 1: Well that was another interesting conversation because I was like,

1415
01:16:16,520 --> 01:16:19,479
Speaker 1: at what point are we like, yeah, so no, he's

1416
01:16:19,520 --> 01:16:21,760
Speaker 1: now he's totally. He's like at home, like ripping out

1417
01:16:21,760 --> 01:16:26,920
Speaker 1: wires and like read moving things and like and and

1418
01:16:27,080 --> 01:16:28,439
Speaker 1: I was like, I want to paint. He was a

1419
01:16:28,479 --> 01:16:30,680
Speaker 1: brand to paint. I was like, there's this it's like

1420
01:16:30,800 --> 01:16:34,800
Speaker 1: ugly brown office colors and here he's like it's fine.

1421
01:16:34,800 --> 01:16:37,080
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, one's not fine. Yeah, I want to paint.

1422
01:16:37,520 --> 01:16:41,880
Speaker 1: Just need Yeah, we painted, and well that's it. We're

1423
01:16:41,920 --> 01:16:46,360
Speaker 1: getting the colors. It's like grays and navy and wood

1424
01:16:46,439 --> 01:16:51,400
Speaker 1: and Silver's are fun. They're really found excited. We're moving

1425
01:16:51,439 --> 01:16:54,160
Speaker 1: to Nashville and we're building a house there. So we're

1426
01:16:54,600 --> 01:16:57,000
Speaker 1: I'm so excited to Jay's room. When are you moving

1427
01:16:57,200 --> 01:17:00,640
Speaker 1: next year? Yeah, we're excited when there. Before we came

1428
01:17:00,640 --> 01:17:03,120
Speaker 1: out here, we're down here like two years and with

1429
01:17:03,240 --> 01:17:05,760
Speaker 1: a growing family, we want more space and we're like

1430
01:17:06,200 --> 01:17:11,240
Speaker 1: out here it's just too expensive. We're just like kids,

1431
01:17:11,439 --> 01:17:16,880
Speaker 1: and we're like, for you, I'm happy that you're you're moving.

1432
01:17:16,960 --> 01:17:19,639
Speaker 1: That's awesome. Thanks. Okay, so where can our listeners find

1433
01:17:19,640 --> 01:17:24,479
Speaker 1: you at? Serena Vincent on Twitter, Instagram, Twitter and Instagram

1434
01:17:24,560 --> 01:17:29,639
Speaker 1: above and yeah awesome. Yeah, well I'm We're so excited

1435
01:17:29,680 --> 01:17:32,720
Speaker 1: for you. Thank you, and please go on her on

1436
01:17:32,760 --> 01:17:35,160
Speaker 1: her little board socials and please wish her a happy,

1437
01:17:35,520 --> 01:17:37,760
Speaker 1: happy delivery. I hope it's cute. You don't have to

1438
01:17:37,760 --> 01:17:40,280
Speaker 1: go the hospital meat to you did not have any

1439
01:17:41,240 --> 01:17:44,160
Speaker 1: that's your yes. Yeah, so we'll see how it goes.

1440
01:17:44,439 --> 01:17:50,200
Speaker 1: That's thanks, Thank you guys. Beautiful Serena is so sweet.

1441
01:17:50,320 --> 01:17:53,120
Speaker 1: That was super sweet. Yeah, she's really sweet. We could

1442
01:17:53,120 --> 01:17:55,240
Speaker 1: have just sat here and talked for you know, she's

1443
01:17:55,280 --> 01:17:58,400
Speaker 1: so beautiful. I loved her perspective. It's I'm just envious

1444
01:17:58,400 --> 01:18:02,880
Speaker 1: of people that can have mentality. I'm even envious of Dean,

1445
01:18:03,040 --> 01:18:05,559
Speaker 1: like how Dean went away for three weeks to where

1446
01:18:05,560 --> 01:18:09,400
Speaker 1: did he go? Eastern when he went to Japan and

1447
01:18:10,240 --> 01:18:12,519
Speaker 1: most recently it isn't like South America South America. I

1448
01:18:12,520 --> 01:18:14,800
Speaker 1: am so envious the people that can just travel alone

1449
01:18:14,880 --> 01:18:17,120
Speaker 1: like that for for three weeks. You know how much

1450
01:18:17,120 --> 01:18:20,320
Speaker 1: anxiety I'd have the second I'd play I'm too far

1451
01:18:20,360 --> 01:18:24,000
Speaker 1: away from this someone. I don't know where to go.

1452
01:18:26,920 --> 01:18:29,080
Speaker 1: I mean, I just have such envy for people that

1453
01:18:29,080 --> 01:18:33,920
Speaker 1: can just go and you know, travel like that or

1454
01:18:33,960 --> 01:18:37,240
Speaker 1: do do a duala berthing and natural. I mean, I

1455
01:18:37,360 --> 01:18:41,320
Speaker 1: just like, wow, to have that anxiety free. But yet

1456
01:18:41,439 --> 01:18:44,000
Speaker 1: her anxiety is a hospital. I'm like, give me a hospital,

1457
01:18:45,120 --> 01:18:47,519
Speaker 1: like I got all the people take care of me, drugs,

1458
01:18:50,400 --> 01:18:52,519
Speaker 1: to me, what's wrong. But it's just it's so funny,

1459
01:18:52,560 --> 01:18:56,519
Speaker 1: like how some people's anxiety is is what causes some

1460
01:18:56,520 --> 01:18:59,680
Speaker 1: people to have anxiety, right exactly. It's people's triggers are

1461
01:18:59,680 --> 01:19:03,080
Speaker 1: different for everybody. Yeah, you know, by the way, you know,

1462
01:19:03,120 --> 01:19:08,439
Speaker 1: we're going home, we're gonna talk about Chris when we're

1463
01:19:08,439 --> 01:19:09,920
Speaker 1: out of the room. I said, hey, babe, are you

1464
01:19:09,960 --> 01:19:13,360
Speaker 1: really serious about every other year? And you're like, oh

1465
01:19:13,400 --> 01:19:16,640
Speaker 1: my god, we're three years away from that decision. And

1466
01:19:16,680 --> 01:19:18,639
Speaker 1: as you politely say, you said, we might not even

1467
01:19:18,680 --> 01:19:24,040
Speaker 1: be together. I was like, we might not even be together,

1468
01:19:24,080 --> 01:19:25,640
Speaker 1: so we don't have to worry about it now to we.

1469
01:19:27,520 --> 01:19:29,479
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't even I don't know what to say.

1470
01:19:30,000 --> 01:19:32,880
Speaker 1: I literally do not know. I don't know, I don't know.

1471
01:19:32,880 --> 01:19:34,840
Speaker 1: I'm sure that's it's gonna be my answer. Can we

1472
01:19:34,840 --> 01:19:39,680
Speaker 1: wrap this show up? We have two kids? Oh my god,

1473
01:19:39,720 --> 01:19:43,960
Speaker 1: we have two kids. All right, that was fun. Thank

1474
01:19:43,960 --> 01:19:47,280
Speaker 1: you to Amazon fire TV. Head to www dot Amazon

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Speaker 1: get twenty dollars off and free shipping if you use

1480
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Speaker 1: a promo code Janna. Thank you to stamps dot com.

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Speaker 1: Get a four week trial plus postage and a digital

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Speaker 1: a big shout out and thank you to our friends

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1487
01:20:25,880 --> 01:20:28,639
Speaker 1: We need to go home to our kids. Oh my gosh,

1488
01:20:28,640 --> 01:20:30,840
Speaker 1: that's crazy. But also I want to see how you

1489
01:20:30,880 --> 01:20:34,080
Speaker 1: guys deal with the holidays, So please email us at

1490
01:20:34,320 --> 01:20:36,400
Speaker 1: Janna Kramer at I heart Media dot com. I want

1491
01:20:36,400 --> 01:20:39,360
Speaker 1: to see how you guys navigate the holidays as a family,

1492
01:20:39,560 --> 01:20:43,639
Speaker 1: couple of relationships and how you negotiate each other's needs

1493
01:20:43,880 --> 01:20:52,960
Speaker 1: and wants and expectations. He's the wife everything. Oh goodness, goodbye,

1494
01:20:54,680 --> 01:20:58,840
Speaker 1: have a good day. That's the way you're in the show.

1495
01:21:00,120 --> 01:21:00,320
Speaker 1: Eight