WEBVTT - Originality (with Raphael Chestang) 0:00:00.320 --> 0:00:03.960 Portions of This American Laugh with Aristotle Atari and Andy Harris. 0:00:04.000 --> 0:00:07.360 The improvised documentary podcast are brought to you by listeners 0:00:07.360 --> 0:00:10.760 like yourself, are esteemed sponsors and the all powerful, all 0:00:10.800 --> 0:00:14.360 knowing Random Sentence Generator, which inspires the stories you're about 0:00:14.400 --> 0:00:18.799 to hear. Yes, whenever you hear this sound, the next 0:00:18.800 --> 0:00:21.440 sentence you hear is a random sentence provided by our 0:00:21.480 --> 0:00:25.480 revered omnipotent Random Sentence Generator. Or more This American Laugh. 0:00:25.760 --> 0:00:28.720 Listen to more episodes of This American Laugh. I guess 0:00:28.960 --> 0:00:34.440 and now your first Random Sentence Day, which is alli 0:00:34.520 --> 0:00:44.840 aren't the best for relationships? Jillian was expecting a guy 0:00:45.120 --> 0:00:49.400 that was classy, debonair a taste for the finer things. Instead, 0:00:49.800 --> 0:00:52.400 you really like potato edges. Can I look over the 0:00:52.440 --> 0:01:01.880 menu again? Please? Yeah? Thank you, thank you? Grah grow Yeah, 0:01:02.200 --> 0:01:04.080 what do you? What do you think? You know what? 0:01:04.360 --> 0:01:08.160 I think I'm gonna go with the wedges? Yeah, yeah, 0:01:08.319 --> 0:01:11.560 potato wedges. Really? Yeah, I think I'm gonna Are they 0:01:11.640 --> 0:01:14.640 like fancy? Do they have like truffles or I'm trying 0:01:14.640 --> 0:01:16.440 to see like, oh, I think if you order a 0:01:16.520 --> 0:01:19.080 side of truffles, Oh, they don't, they don't oh you 0:01:19.160 --> 0:01:22.560 have to. Okay, well just you know, I mean the 0:01:22.680 --> 0:01:28.479 frog corod we're here. Yeah, but we're to celebrate your promotion. Yes, 0:01:28.720 --> 0:01:31.680 and you know what, you order whatever you want off 0:01:31.720 --> 0:01:34.960 of this menu. I personally I'm going to go with 0:01:35.040 --> 0:01:39.119 the potato wedges. Well, I'm gonna I'm gonna feel bad. 0:01:39.680 --> 0:01:41.240 You don't have to feel bad. No, no, no, just 0:01:41.400 --> 0:01:44.600 order anything you want from this menu, from this quadrant 0:01:44.680 --> 0:01:48.880 of the menu. Yeah, down here, right on the bottom right, Yeah, 0:01:49.120 --> 0:01:51.840 anything you want from there. Okay, now that is it's 0:01:51.840 --> 0:01:54.840 your day. Thank you, yes, thank you for clarifying. Horris. 0:01:54.920 --> 0:01:58.320 Of course, these are just the appetizers. I'm like an 0:01:58.600 --> 0:02:05.120 entre kind of woman. Okay, I mean I'm the first chair. Now, okay, 0:02:05.160 --> 0:02:08.960 look at what time is it? In fifteen minutes, I'm 0:02:08.960 --> 0:02:13.600 in the mood. Displurge, yes you, yes, promotion, yes, do it. 0:02:13.919 --> 0:02:16.560 But in minutes you can flip over and you can 0:02:16.680 --> 0:02:20.440 order anything you want off the happy hour menu in 0:02:20.520 --> 0:02:24.679 the top left quadrant. Appetizers again. Yeah, no, no, no, no, 0:02:24.800 --> 0:02:27.679 there's some entrees on there. I mean, if you, if you, 0:02:27.840 --> 0:02:32.359 if you take multiple appetizers, can be in entree. Look, 0:02:32.560 --> 0:02:35.200 one of us works really hard. Okay, yes, I do. Yes, 0:02:36.280 --> 0:02:38.400 And these bills aren't going to pay themselves, No, they 0:02:38.480 --> 0:02:41.320 are not. You're going to pay them, I am, because look, 0:02:41.320 --> 0:02:44.120 I'm not gonna be getting any work anytime soon on 0:02:44.200 --> 0:02:47.359 account of the injury. I wanted to talk to you about. 0:02:48.400 --> 0:02:51.520 How are you feeling like in that chair? You look 0:02:51.560 --> 0:02:55.480 a little uncomfortable. My ankle is still harding a little bit. 0:02:55.600 --> 0:02:59.120 But that's what happens when you unintentionally slip and fall 0:02:59.360 --> 0:03:02.400 in a target parking lot. Yeah, it happens. I want 0:03:02.440 --> 0:03:04.440 to get back on the horse, that's right, wire not 0:03:04.600 --> 0:03:07.440 so though I didn't get back to it too soon. Yeah, well, 0:03:07.520 --> 0:03:10.400 once the disability check stuff rolling out, I'm sure that 0:03:10.520 --> 0:03:13.600 that's that's really right around the time when I will heal. Yeah. Well, 0:03:13.760 --> 0:03:18.560 as a lawyer, as as I am a first chair lawyer, 0:03:18.800 --> 0:03:21.440 right now, I'm going to advise you to stop telling 0:03:21.520 --> 0:03:24.440 me stuff like this because it kind of gives me 0:03:24.960 --> 0:03:29.720 not plausible deniability, the opposite of plausible denying. Yeah, okay, 0:03:29.760 --> 0:03:32.280 but but but in the way that it's like attorney 0:03:32.320 --> 0:03:37.560 client privilege. This is confessing to crimes person hearing the 0:03:37.760 --> 0:03:41.360 crimes privilege. Right, That's that's a thing, right, you are 0:03:41.480 --> 0:03:44.880 trying really hard, and I will applaud you for knowing 0:03:44.960 --> 0:03:48.040 about attorney client privilege, but that is actually a thing 0:03:48.160 --> 0:03:51.680 that is only between you and your actual attorney, not 0:03:51.880 --> 0:03:55.800 just any attorney, as I am days later doing at 0:03:55.800 --> 0:04:01.840 a surprise pop in at her office. Julian, Hey, how 0:04:02.000 --> 0:04:05.640 are you. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm still 0:04:05.640 --> 0:04:08.920 a little full from that from that Melia bought me. Yeah, 0:04:09.200 --> 0:04:12.600 you do look celebrate your promotion. That was very nice 0:04:12.680 --> 0:04:14.240 of you. By the way, I don't know why I 0:04:14.360 --> 0:04:18.280 forgot my wallet, probably because my wallet doesn't exist anyway, 0:04:18.680 --> 0:04:21.800 I wanted to run something by you. Sure, how would 0:04:21.839 --> 0:04:27.480 you feel about representing me? Okay, you know I thought 0:04:27.520 --> 0:04:30.320 about that. It's not a specific case, by the way, Okay, 0:04:30.480 --> 0:04:34.200 just in life, right, right, I have thought about representing you. 0:04:34.320 --> 0:04:35.840 So I don't want you to think that I have 0:04:35.960 --> 0:04:39.560 not given this any thought. When I deny you right now, 0:04:40.600 --> 0:04:44.120 so I have thought about it a lot. When you 0:04:44.279 --> 0:04:48.360 deny me, Oh so you've already y. Yes, I have 0:04:48.600 --> 0:04:51.240 decided that this this is not going to work out. 0:04:51.320 --> 0:04:56.480 I don't think. Okay, well, I know that as a lawyer, 0:04:56.560 --> 0:05:02.240 you don't like to argue. Yeah, but I am entitled 0:05:02.400 --> 0:05:06.400 to at least a one hour free consultation, So if 0:05:06.440 --> 0:05:08.920 you wouldn't mind, I'd like to take advantage of the 0:05:09.000 --> 0:05:12.240 next fifty eight minutes. Of course, try to convince you 0:05:12.720 --> 0:05:17.000 to take on my overall life as a case. Well, 0:05:17.200 --> 0:05:20.240 I don't want to have a bad reputation, so I 0:05:20.320 --> 0:05:24.960 will hear you out. Eight minutes past, fifty eight minutes 0:05:25.480 --> 0:05:29.360 passed by. Just let me know when that fifty eight 0:05:29.400 --> 0:05:32.280 minutes is going to start. Here, God, what what? What? Night? 0:05:32.640 --> 0:05:37.360 It's here, it's been here. I am so sorry. I 0:05:37.440 --> 0:05:40.280 am so sorry. I did not become first chair by 0:05:40.320 --> 0:05:43.000 behaving this way. But you are taking me to a 0:05:43.120 --> 0:05:46.400 place where I need to suit you to get out 0:05:46.480 --> 0:05:50.360 of my office. They didn't found themselves in Yeah, Ron, 0:05:50.960 --> 0:05:55.160 we're having a hard time understanding what the problem is here. 0:05:55.560 --> 0:05:59.840 Let me just definitely in here. She's refusing to represent 0:06:00.080 --> 0:06:04.200 me as is my right. I see, well, the court reporter, 0:06:04.360 --> 0:06:08.240 please read back the last fifty eight minutes of testimony. 0:06:08.560 --> 0:06:13.800 Oh God, if the long, lean, tedious minutes pasted, Oh 0:06:13.960 --> 0:06:18.440 you know what I find for I gotta be honest, 0:06:18.520 --> 0:06:21.680 I haven't been listening to any of what any of you. 0:06:22.720 --> 0:06:26.800 Yeah you cannot admit to that. But no garden, no, 0:06:27.320 --> 0:06:31.240 no good. That is unacceptable. I have never in all 0:06:31.400 --> 0:06:34.200 my years, I did not become first chair by listening 0:06:34.240 --> 0:06:37.840 to this bullshit. I moved to strike what I just 0:06:38.240 --> 0:06:41.560 said from the record. Thank you, saying it doesn't really 0:06:41.680 --> 0:06:44.080 work like that. I would like to speak sure the 0:06:45.400 --> 0:06:49.520 complaining attorney my chambers, please, thank you. I guess that's me. 0:06:49.880 --> 0:06:53.280 Do they invent to the judge's chambers? She but notice 0:06:53.880 --> 0:06:57.040 were any law books on the shelf? No degrees on 0:06:57.120 --> 0:07:01.839 the wall? Portion counselor yes? Um? How do you feel 0:07:01.920 --> 0:07:07.120 about representing me in life? There's something that works kind 0:07:07.160 --> 0:07:09.600 of drifted off during that hole, during that whole part 0:07:09.680 --> 0:07:12.200 and during the whole the whole, during the whole trial. 0:07:12.440 --> 0:07:16.160 Just now so I I seem to remember the guy 0:07:16.280 --> 0:07:18.520 saying that he wanted you to represent of your life. 0:07:18.520 --> 0:07:20.960 But like I just kind of fell it, fell asleep 0:07:21.080 --> 0:07:24.440 with my eyes open. You know what I would represent you? 0:07:24.520 --> 0:07:29.320 Oh God? And I'll represent you form a very small 0:07:29.560 --> 0:07:34.960 monetary feet as long as I can be guaranteed that 0:07:35.160 --> 0:07:37.720 you kind of hear me out a little bit. I'm 0:07:37.760 --> 0:07:41.200 not asking for you to do anything illegal here, Give 0:07:41.280 --> 0:07:45.880 me preference because it sounds a lot of like I know, 0:07:46.040 --> 0:07:49.000 it sounds like that some people would think that it was, 0:07:49.200 --> 0:07:50.960 but they don't know the law. You know what. I 0:07:51.000 --> 0:07:54.080 think a qualified judge might consider this to be bribery, 0:07:54.320 --> 0:07:57.800 and it's very serious crime. But I don't see any 0:07:57.880 --> 0:08:02.280 of those here. You're merring, dismissed, thank you, thank you. 0:08:09.200 --> 0:08:12.680 This is this American laugh. I'm sorry. As always, I'm 0:08:12.720 --> 0:08:15.040 joined by producer Andy and I especially guest contributor for 0:08:15.120 --> 0:08:18.480 this week is Raphael chest Dang and our show we'll 0:08:18.520 --> 0:08:21.080 be using our chest Random Sense generator to bring you 0:08:21.320 --> 0:08:26.160 a fully improvised show in three acts. This week's theme originality. 0:08:26.640 --> 0:08:29.520 That makes ideas unique, and that's what we all strive for. 0:08:30.160 --> 0:08:38.480 Originality Day with Us. Act one bloc into the basement 0:08:38.840 --> 0:08:41.439 with the horror movie from the night before playing in 0:08:41.520 --> 0:08:52.280 his head. Sorry, trying to sleep down here, I just 0:08:52.520 --> 0:08:55.080 I forgot my forgot my magazine. It's right under here. 0:08:55.640 --> 0:08:59.560 Are you okay? The movie? The movie, but mylat sight 0:09:00.240 --> 0:09:04.199 really stuck with me. I can't shake it. I should 0:09:04.360 --> 0:09:06.520 never let you watch that. No, it's okay, you can. 0:09:07.280 --> 0:09:09.880 This is a one off. Don't worry. I'm fine, I'll 0:09:09.920 --> 0:09:12.760 be fine. This usually never happens, so you can. You'll 0:09:12.800 --> 0:09:16.480 be fine letting me watch whatever I want in perpetuity. 0:09:16.679 --> 0:09:23.880 Next morning, Johnny, Yes, father, why are you whine in 0:09:23.960 --> 0:09:30.880 India Cereal? Because I'm nervous about Was it Tommy? I'll 0:09:31.200 --> 0:09:37.800 be no, Yes, it was, it was? It wasn't it? Yes, 0:09:37.840 --> 0:09:41.199 it was? It was definitely Tommy. It was badass little 0:09:41.240 --> 0:09:45.720 boy he is, and I'm scared him and my last 0:09:45.880 --> 0:09:49.920 interaction with him really stuck with me. Like a movie. 0:09:50.200 --> 0:09:51.880 Do you know anything about that? I mean, of course 0:09:52.520 --> 0:09:55.680 an example, movies don't really make that sort of an 0:09:55.679 --> 0:09:59.679 impression on me. That would No. No, I think I'm 0:09:59.720 --> 0:10:02.560 free to continue watching and consuming any sort of television 0:10:02.640 --> 0:10:06.520 or a movie that I What are you mumbling about? 0:10:07.080 --> 0:10:12.760 I'm trying, I'm getting No, it's Tommy, definitely Tommy. And 0:10:13.880 --> 0:10:23.079 next day? What you keep me in trouble? What you 0:10:23.200 --> 0:10:24.960 keep I told you it's gonna get me in trouble. 0:10:25.080 --> 0:10:27.600 You keep whining, and now Dad thinks that I'm doing 0:10:27.679 --> 0:10:30.360 something bad to you. Listen, you gotta do me this favor. Yes, 0:10:30.559 --> 0:10:33.240 you just gotta take the heat every once in a while. 0:10:33.480 --> 0:10:36.040 I can't do You want Dad to continue to let 0:10:36.120 --> 0:10:39.320 us watch whatever we want or not. Yes, of course 0:10:39.400 --> 0:10:41.360 I do. What then the sacrifice that you're going to 0:10:41.440 --> 0:10:43.319 have to make is you're going to have to take 0:10:43.360 --> 0:10:46.559 the blame for my outbursts of fear every once in 0:10:46.640 --> 0:10:49.559 a while. Okay, but I can't keep beating dad's as 0:10:50.040 --> 0:10:51.920 every night, all right, Yeah, I mean he kind of 0:10:51.960 --> 0:10:54.480 deserves it a little. Yeah, he deserves that. He comes 0:10:54.559 --> 0:10:56.440 at me, he's small. I mean, come on, you got 0:10:56.559 --> 0:10:59.040 to admit that it feels a little good. Okay, it 0:10:59.120 --> 0:11:02.040 feels good every once in a while, But sometimes I'd 0:11:02.120 --> 0:11:04.079 like to imagine that he was like the dad that 0:11:04.120 --> 0:11:08.120 could protect me from something, not like I gotta protect him. Listen, 0:11:08.320 --> 0:11:13.000 just please just cut out the whining. Okay, next day again, 0:11:14.440 --> 0:11:18.960 feeling real good, feeling real good today, extra good? Really, Yes, 0:11:21.000 --> 0:11:23.600 your brother is getting what was that? You know? Sometimes 0:11:23.600 --> 0:11:25.400 I just feel so good and comfortable and calm that 0:11:25.480 --> 0:11:27.960 it just startles me. It's such a good feeling. He's fine. 0:11:28.280 --> 0:11:31.679 Tommy's okay, tom He's okay, You're okay, because don't make 0:11:31.760 --> 0:11:34.120 me have to go back in there again. The boy 0:11:34.240 --> 0:11:36.440 is getting real good at jiu jitsu. Do you want 0:11:36.480 --> 0:11:41.679 me to to reapply the bomb? Please? Good lord, why 0:11:41.800 --> 0:11:44.920 you even ask sir? I'm looking over your chart here 0:11:45.040 --> 0:11:50.520 and um, a lot of accidents recently. Yeah, I got 0:11:50.600 --> 0:11:53.120 a lot of stairs. Can we move on please? That 0:11:53.240 --> 0:11:57.839 doesn't need more to this is this is Jeffrey. He 0:11:58.240 --> 0:12:01.959 is social work, grew with the state. Yeah, he just 0:12:02.240 --> 0:12:05.400 wants to chat. He just wants to chat with you. 0:12:05.520 --> 0:12:07.920 Is that? Is that? Okay? Would you mind if I yeah, 0:12:08.280 --> 0:12:10.199 I can give you my number and then I'll just 0:12:10.280 --> 0:12:12.839 be a now he would actually like to talk to 0:12:12.920 --> 0:12:17.079 you right now and all right, let's go there. So 0:12:18.000 --> 0:12:22.880 you doing, sir? How are you feeling? I'm feeling bad? Oh? 0:12:23.120 --> 0:12:27.599 What why? Because of the because of yes, the accidents 0:12:27.760 --> 0:12:32.800 down my stairs. We don't have much time. Somebody hurting you? 0:12:33.880 --> 0:12:37.320 Somebody's hurting you? Is it? Is it? A big, strong, 0:12:37.559 --> 0:12:43.240 scary adult? Almost really? Oh? What is the name of 0:12:43.360 --> 0:12:47.199 the adult? Full grown adult? Because because clearly you're six 0:12:47.240 --> 0:12:50.400 ft four, it must take a very strong, big Yes, 0:12:50.720 --> 0:12:55.439 I am too old for this. I can't tell you 0:12:55.920 --> 0:13:00.480 what happened. I cannot explain to you all the years 0:13:00.760 --> 0:13:08.440 of living as has it taken. Sir, you're t Can 0:13:08.480 --> 0:13:10.040 I talk to you for just a second? Just meet 0:13:10.040 --> 0:13:14.640 and you are real quick. Excuse me. If you tell 0:13:15.840 --> 0:13:19.959 what Tommy has been doing to you, you regret it 0:13:20.200 --> 0:13:23.360 for the rest of your days. Don't you ruin this 0:13:23.640 --> 0:13:26.800 US special work. They move forward with his investigation. The 0:13:26.920 --> 0:13:29.319 family found themselves in the court room. All right, so 0:13:29.760 --> 0:13:33.319 all right in the matter of Thomas's father versus a 0:13:33.559 --> 0:13:38.200 very big, strong, scary adult man um, seems that all 0:13:38.280 --> 0:13:41.839 parties aren't present here. Sorry, where where is the defendant? 0:13:42.520 --> 0:13:46.079 I'm not seeing He's in Canada? Really? Yeah? And what's 0:13:46.120 --> 0:13:50.760 his name? His name is Bills, Bills a baby, but 0:13:51.120 --> 0:13:54.719 that his Bills the Baby. It's a stage name. I 0:13:54.800 --> 0:13:56.760 don't have his real name. Well, the carey part of 0:13:56.800 --> 0:14:01.240 please read back to the plaintiffs testimony. Players, Yes, your honor, 0:14:02.040 --> 0:14:05.560 his name is Bells the baby, Bells, the baby, some trembling, 0:14:05.679 --> 0:14:08.559 some trembling, and then he just kind of drifted off 0:14:08.600 --> 0:14:11.920 and just stopped really talking. Thank you very much? All right, 0:14:12.040 --> 0:14:16.719 I don't so please remember that you're under oath, sir. Yes, 0:14:17.280 --> 0:14:21.960 are you making all of this up because you're embarrassed 0:14:22.040 --> 0:14:28.320 of who's really hurting you? I gotta tell you, I 0:14:28.440 --> 0:14:31.920 was not expecting you write off the battle like that. Well, 0:14:31.960 --> 0:14:34.440 the core reporter please right back or I just said 0:14:34.600 --> 0:14:38.360 I guess I just wasn't expecting you to to say that, 0:14:38.480 --> 0:14:41.000 and then you just kind of stopped for a second 0:14:41.440 --> 0:14:43.480 because I just think that you couldn't think of anything 0:14:43.560 --> 0:14:49.120 else to say. Okay, I'm okay, Well you don't watch um. 0:14:53.560 --> 0:15:01.320 I wish you'd all take a nap. Coming up Act, 0:15:02.040 --> 0:15:05.280 But first, some words from our sponsors who make this 0:15:05.560 --> 0:15:21.560 high quality program possible. Stay with us Act two, the 0:15:21.680 --> 0:15:25.360 inter of you. That's welcome this week, specially guest contributor 0:15:25.520 --> 0:15:29.200 Rafaelle chest saying, Rafaelle, welcome, Thank you. Good to have 0:15:29.320 --> 0:15:31.680 you here, like it's good to be here. Have you 0:15:31.760 --> 0:15:35.040 been listening to the show? I am a I have 0:15:35.280 --> 0:15:40.040 been a very avid listener for at least two days. Yes, sure, 0:15:40.120 --> 0:15:42.400 it's been two days. Or has it been like a 0:15:42.600 --> 0:15:44.960 very long time? Oh? You know what actually has been 0:15:44.960 --> 0:15:47.640 a very very long time. It was the first episode. 0:15:47.680 --> 0:15:50.920 Do you ever heard the first episode? I heard? Uh 0:15:51.960 --> 0:15:58.480 was the one where uh with the flying um raccoons. 0:15:58.800 --> 0:16:03.680 Oh you know we actually have that at no episode? Yes? Really? Yeah? 0:16:04.760 --> 0:16:07.120 And he has everything in his kay, let's hear that 0:16:07.200 --> 0:16:11.240 clip now, Fara, look up there, Sarah, look look up there. 0:16:11.640 --> 0:16:16.720 Where to your left, my left? Whoa what what is that? 0:16:17.120 --> 0:16:20.080 What is that? What is it? It is to my laft? 0:16:20.120 --> 0:16:23.200 I'm asking yes, I'm asking you what it is? Yes, 0:16:23.240 --> 0:16:26.920 it's your laugh, Yeah, yes, what is it? What is it? 0:16:27.760 --> 0:16:31.560 Flying something? What do you think it could be that's 0:16:31.600 --> 0:16:33.240 flying up there? You know, I'll tell you what It 0:16:33.320 --> 0:16:37.480 probably ain't Probably ain't pigs. That would make no sense. 0:16:38.760 --> 0:16:41.240 It ain't flying money. You know what I think would 0:16:41.240 --> 0:16:43.200 be good? I think that I well, yeah, if it 0:16:43.400 --> 0:16:45.080 was flying money, but then it's not how would we 0:16:45.200 --> 0:16:47.640 get to it's fine money? How would we get to it? 0:16:47.680 --> 0:16:48.960 We would have to be like what would we do? 0:16:49.040 --> 0:16:51.040 We have to build up down brick wall and then 0:16:51.080 --> 0:16:52.480 put a ladder up next to it and then get 0:16:52.520 --> 0:16:54.880 up to it or fly may fly drone up there. 0:16:55.280 --> 0:16:58.120 Regardless what do you think it is? It ain't money, 0:16:58.600 --> 0:17:01.880 and ain't pigs. Ain't no pigs, and it sure ain't 0:17:01.920 --> 0:17:04.520 no money. It ain't a plane, It ain't trees. If 0:17:04.560 --> 0:17:06.040 it was a plane, that would have been the first 0:17:06.080 --> 0:17:07.840 thing that I said, Yeah, you know what I mean. 0:17:11.000 --> 0:17:14.200 And it's it's very it's pretty easy identified plane, you 0:17:14.240 --> 0:17:16.159 know what I mean, Because it has wings and it 0:17:16.200 --> 0:17:17.840 has the lights. You ever look up in the sky 0:17:18.000 --> 0:17:20.040 and you think it's a shooting star, but then you're like, 0:17:20.200 --> 0:17:22.879 wait a minute, that shooting stars blinking and moving at 0:17:22.920 --> 0:17:25.320 a steady rate, very slowly, and you're like, oh, ship, 0:17:25.400 --> 0:17:27.960 that's the plane. Has that ever happened to you? Yeah, 0:17:28.119 --> 0:17:32.080 that it happens to me. I think it might be 0:17:32.200 --> 0:17:38.760 a rackcon is definitely why is that happening? How did 0:17:38.840 --> 0:17:42.600 it happen? It must be a science experiment. I've seen 0:17:42.680 --> 0:17:46.159 it on Netflix. Did yeah, it did so many searching 0:17:46.200 --> 0:17:49.200 in these experiments. All right? Is that this is the 0:17:49.280 --> 0:17:52.560 day we've been waiting for the day that finally we 0:17:52.680 --> 0:17:57.960 will be recognized as the intelligent scientists that we are. Yes, Yes, 0:17:58.119 --> 0:18:01.200 today is the day that we Oh, this kid be 0:18:01.320 --> 0:18:04.520 right the raccoon, Oh, that's it. Raccoons fly, that's it. 0:18:05.200 --> 0:18:08.359 That's it. Yeah, we made raccoons that because he was 0:18:08.400 --> 0:18:12.480 trying to do something really spe what's the scientific benefits 0:18:12.520 --> 0:18:15.280 of knowing whether or not raccoon could fly? Well, my 0:18:15.480 --> 0:18:20.159 dad used to always say, raccoons are the scientists of 0:18:20.520 --> 0:18:23.000 the woods. Your dad said back, yeah, because they go 0:18:23.119 --> 0:18:26.280 investigating in the trash and they got all the fingers 0:18:26.320 --> 0:18:28.960 in it. Very, very smart. So if you can give 0:18:29.080 --> 0:18:31.400 them wings, that's about all they can't do. Your dad's 0:18:31.440 --> 0:18:34.480 not all of this, Yes, and he was the smartest 0:18:34.640 --> 0:18:38.240 man that I knew who never went to college. A 0:18:38.280 --> 0:18:41.440 little deeper and found the audio if the Scientists father 0:18:42.359 --> 0:18:48.680 on the deathbed, Son, Yes, I have two final things 0:18:48.760 --> 0:18:51.439 to say to you. I'm here for both. First thing 0:18:51.640 --> 0:18:54.760 is take care of your sister. She looks up to you. Yeah. 0:18:55.040 --> 0:19:02.119 Second thing is, raccoons are scientists nature because they explore 0:19:02.240 --> 0:19:05.080 the trash cans and they dig into the trash cans 0:19:05.160 --> 0:19:08.480 with their tiny Why are you writing this down? I 0:19:08.640 --> 0:19:11.199 was just telling that's fine, just like oh my hand 0:19:11.280 --> 0:19:15.720 write to get a pan, Okay, okay, because they don't 0:19:15.720 --> 0:19:19.440 need to start over, okay, okay. Raccoons a scientists of 0:19:19.560 --> 0:19:24.640 foot of nature because they dig into the trash because 0:19:25.040 --> 0:19:27.800 they have their little hands and they dig in through 0:19:27.840 --> 0:19:32.439 the trash with their hands and they next page, I'm 0:19:32.480 --> 0:19:36.240 not I'm not even one tenth of the way finished. Son. 0:19:37.080 --> 0:19:39.760 So that was your favorite episode. Yeah, that was a 0:19:39.800 --> 0:19:43.359 pretty good one. That's what we want some awards from 0:19:43.359 --> 0:19:48.560 that one. Living. I'm an actor comedy writer. Before that, 0:19:48.760 --> 0:19:52.840 I used to write for an entertainment news website. It 0:19:52.920 --> 0:19:54.800 was one of those that was also a show, This 0:19:54.880 --> 0:19:57.800 is Entertainment News show and website. And I did that 0:19:57.920 --> 0:20:01.320 for nine years before that, so that was. Yeah, that 0:20:01.440 --> 0:20:03.000 was most of the time that I was on here. 0:20:03.040 --> 0:20:04.440 I moved out to l A and oh seven and 0:20:04.520 --> 0:20:08.200 I started working there eight Wow. Yeah, was that fascinating work? 0:20:10.480 --> 0:20:15.440 Was it fascinating? Uh so? I think most people would 0:20:15.520 --> 0:20:17.960 probably or maybe not most people, but a lot of 0:20:18.000 --> 0:20:22.200 people would consider it fascinating. I was not fascinated by it. 0:20:22.359 --> 0:20:24.680 I don't. But there were some interesting things that happened. 0:20:24.880 --> 0:20:27.760 Like I was there for the day that Michael Jackson died. 0:20:28.160 --> 0:20:31.960 I was, Yeah, that was pretty big day I was there. Well, no, 0:20:32.119 --> 0:20:34.680 I wasn't in the building when Whitney Houston died. That 0:20:34.800 --> 0:20:37.680 was on the weekend. But um, yeah, I mean, yeah, 0:20:37.840 --> 0:20:41.920 some interesting things happened. I have a question about that. Yeah. 0:20:42.080 --> 0:20:45.520 Do they always have to break a story, regardless of 0:20:45.600 --> 0:20:47.840 how trivial it is? Do they always have to put 0:20:47.920 --> 0:20:51.560 the same amount of energy and like the thing? See, 0:20:51.640 --> 0:20:54.640 this is what I mean, like that energy. I think 0:20:54.720 --> 0:20:57.399 they believe it. That's what I mean. When you asked me, 0:20:57.560 --> 0:21:00.560 is it fascinating? I think they really think it's some 0:21:00.720 --> 0:21:03.399 of them really think it's fascinating. But yes, they do 0:21:03.640 --> 0:21:06.400 have to do that because just imagine, like it's so dumb, 0:21:07.040 --> 0:21:09.000 so you you gout you have it's a hearts that 0:21:09.080 --> 0:21:11.440 you gotta sell it hard. We have we actually have 0:21:11.840 --> 0:21:17.480 in our archives awesome audio of the of the story 0:21:17.600 --> 0:21:21.399 pitch meetings from back then. Okay, okay, all right, everybody, Hey, 0:21:21.480 --> 0:21:24.119 gather around. We've got a lot of hot stories that 0:21:24.200 --> 0:21:26.720 I want everybody to give me your hottest story that 0:21:26.840 --> 0:21:31.480 we we've got. I've got what's this right here? Andrew, 0:21:31.560 --> 0:21:36.359 La Ran and Pan have split out. Oh my god, 0:21:36.880 --> 0:21:42.720 Oh my god. They had a terrible disagreement and that 0:21:42.920 --> 0:21:48.320 that was the last strong god, Oh my god, I 0:21:48.480 --> 0:21:51.840 am not okay. I am not okay. After hearing this 0:21:52.280 --> 0:21:55.639 nugget of information about this story. What other stories do 0:21:55.720 --> 0:21:58.680 we have that aren't you even related? We have? We 0:21:58.840 --> 0:22:03.639 have that Beyonce and jay Z grew apart. No, no, 0:22:04.400 --> 0:22:12.440 this kid happy happened, but not now, not here, jazy? 0:22:12.800 --> 0:22:17.120 Why be honest? Why I might have a chest pains? 0:22:17.359 --> 0:22:20.920 Oh god? Why are they growing apart? What's happening to that? 0:22:22.040 --> 0:22:26.000 But I heard that they were having separate friend groups, 0:22:26.200 --> 0:22:30.280 and uh, they just kind of had different life experiences. 0:22:30.359 --> 0:22:35.200 Oh god they Oh god, they weren't gonna go down 0:22:35.320 --> 0:22:39.639 that winning. O. God, this news is so upsetting. I 0:22:39.760 --> 0:22:43.199 might leave my wife. That was crazy. Yeah, things got 0:22:43.280 --> 0:22:46.080 intense in there. Yeah it did. That's too bad. Yeah, 0:22:46.359 --> 0:22:48.840 over some small stuff. You always know that you wanted 0:22:48.880 --> 0:22:51.480 to do this for it? Yeah, pretty much. I knew 0:22:51.520 --> 0:22:53.840 that I wanted to do it. I'm sure. Yeah. What 0:22:53.960 --> 0:22:56.560 would you consider to be your big break? Well, when 0:22:56.600 --> 0:22:58.880 I was when I was about four years old in Chica, 0:22:58.920 --> 0:23:01.520 I'm originally from Chicago. Go we started doing the when 0:23:01.560 --> 0:23:04.680 I say we, like, my brother and I started doing 0:23:04.800 --> 0:23:07.720 commercials there and then I would also do theater there. 0:23:07.760 --> 0:23:10.960 It's like a big theater town. And then um but yeah, 0:23:11.080 --> 0:23:14.600 as far as like as an adult really college humor 0:23:14.920 --> 0:23:17.879 in uh seen joint in college humor in twenty seventeen, 0:23:17.960 --> 0:23:21.360 that was like the thing where I was like, okay, yeah, 0:23:21.359 --> 0:23:22.800 I can make a living at this now. So you 0:23:22.840 --> 0:23:24.920 did commercials when you were a kidding Yeah, yeah, yeah, 0:23:25.160 --> 0:23:28.280 commercial I did. My first commersion was for stovetop stuff. 0:23:28.320 --> 0:23:30.840 And as I opened the door and I say, Denise, 0:23:31.000 --> 0:23:35.280 mom is making stovetop stuff in the night. It was 0:23:35.320 --> 0:23:38.959 a national spot. Uh maybe it was national. I mean 0:23:39.000 --> 0:23:41.000 I was like seven at that time, so I don't 0:23:41.040 --> 0:23:42.760 remember if it was national or not. I just knew 0:23:42.760 --> 0:23:44.240 there was a camera in my face. You want to 0:23:44.320 --> 0:23:49.359 know something that in our archives we have the meeting 0:23:49.800 --> 0:23:54.320 between you and your agents. Yes, when he was first 0:23:54.440 --> 0:23:58.520 interviewing you, right when you were a kid. Okay, I 0:23:58.560 --> 0:24:01.880 don't remember that. We do have it right, So you're 0:24:01.960 --> 0:24:08.920 you're it's gonna be great. You all right? Next we 0:24:09.119 --> 0:24:15.000 have rough fail chest ches. Just dang, I'm so sorry. 0:24:15.160 --> 0:24:18.200 I didn't even finish writing the last name on this 0:24:18.440 --> 0:24:22.560 piece of paper. And I'm very very sorry. No, that's okay, okay, 0:24:22.680 --> 0:24:27.720 young man? Why why should I a very successful agent? 0:24:28.480 --> 0:24:33.720 Many national commercials under my belt, some local, mostly local, 0:24:34.040 --> 0:24:37.040 some national commercials. I mean, come on, let's let's be honest. 0:24:37.880 --> 0:24:40.000 Things not really popping off like I hope they would 0:24:40.160 --> 0:24:44.280 for me. Um, are you really bad? Now? I'm sorry, 0:24:44.320 --> 0:24:47.320 I'm sorry. I just sometimes I talk as I talk 0:24:47.400 --> 0:24:50.600 out loud, and I just really am looking for my 0:24:51.000 --> 0:24:53.840 big break. I'm looking for that one shient that's gonna 0:24:54.040 --> 0:24:57.240 finally launch me into the stratosphere. And by into the stratosphere, 0:24:57.280 --> 0:24:59.920 I mean in a position where I can actually pay 0:25:00.200 --> 0:25:05.639 my gas bill this month. Shelley's going to leave if 0:25:05.680 --> 0:25:09.679 they don't. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, Rafael. Um 0:25:10.080 --> 0:25:11.840 so oh no, no, no, no, no. This is a 0:25:11.920 --> 0:25:14.960 happy one. This is a happy one. Yeah. Yeah, this 0:25:15.080 --> 0:25:18.000 is a happy one. Okay. So this is for and 0:25:18.160 --> 0:25:23.119 keep in mind, I really need this commission, okay, And 0:25:23.359 --> 0:25:26.200 I'm giving you a break here because I only take 0:25:26.560 --> 0:25:34.320 six commission Okay, Yes, it's standard. This is for stovetop stuffing. 0:25:34.920 --> 0:25:39.439