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Speaker 1: Motherfucking many years. So motherfucking many years. Yep, yep, yep,

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Speaker 1: there it is. There it is. Ladies and gentlemen, Welcome

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Speaker 1: to another but now no episode of My Mama Told Me,

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Speaker 1: the podcast where we dive deep, deep into the pockets

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Speaker 1: of black conspiracy theories and we finally worked to prove

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Speaker 1: the theories that you the listeners have at home. It

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Speaker 1: is a motherfucking Many episode. That's right, folks, we're doing it.

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Speaker 1: We are doing one of the Many ships again. Every

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Speaker 1: time I think I got away, the streets called me

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Speaker 1: back for another motherfucking any episode. And this week's Many episode.

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Speaker 1: It's gonna be a fun one. I think. I think

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Speaker 1: it's pretty interesting. It's got a lot of a lot

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Speaker 1: of zip to it, a lot of a lot of

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Speaker 1: a lot of bazass, a lot of Zatarans. You know

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Speaker 1: that that San Francisco treat is that what Zadarans was.

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Speaker 1: One of those was the San Francisco. No Rice Erroni

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Speaker 1: was the San Francisco treat. Zatans was Rice. Of the

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Speaker 1: New Orleans sects, they loved jazz, those white uh, those

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Speaker 1: white overseers love jazz. Whereas the Rice Erroni white overseers loved.

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Speaker 1: I guess trolley cars. I don't. I don't really know

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Speaker 1: what makes San Francisco food so distinct for them. That's

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Speaker 1: neither here nor there today's episode. Today's theory comes from

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Speaker 1: a person named Brandon. Brandon sent me a message, and

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna play it for you now. Links sir, My

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Speaker 1: mama told me that Thomas Jeffers said and Abraham Lincoln

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Speaker 1: were black, but not just that we've had seven mixed

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Speaker 1: race presidents including Obama. All right, well that's short and sweet, Brandon,

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Speaker 1: thank you for your for your very straightforward a message.

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Speaker 1: You don't hold back at all. You just jump right

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Speaker 1: into it. You're you're sick funk that way, Brandon, No

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Speaker 1: for play. But you said that there are seven mixed

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Speaker 1: race presidents, including Obama. And I want to be clear

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Speaker 1: that Brandon sent me a follow up email where he

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Speaker 1: listed the supposed me groid's who had snuck their way

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Speaker 1: into the presidency before Obama showed up. The list that

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Speaker 1: I've received from from Brandon and I've compiled here are

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Speaker 1: Thomas Jefferson, Abraham Lincoln, Calvin Coolidge, Warren Harding, Dwight Eisenhower,

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Speaker 1: and the biggest shakra for me, The one that really

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Speaker 1: hit as a surprise was Andrew Jackson. Now I want

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Speaker 1: to be clear, not all of these people have been

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Speaker 1: suggested to been black. Okay, they're not all allegedly uh

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Speaker 1: mixed with black. Some of them are mixed with other stuff.

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Speaker 1: But more importantly, they're not as purely Caucasian as American

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Speaker 1: textbooks would like you to believe. I think the best

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Speaker 1: thing we can do is sort of run down this

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Speaker 1: list and talk about each one individually. Now, let's get

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Speaker 1: some of them out of the way right from the top.

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Speaker 1: There doesn't seem to be enough evidence, enough substantiated evidence

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Speaker 1: at least to support either Warren Harding or Dwight eisenhowerd

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Speaker 1: being mixed. It seems like some people just started spreading

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Speaker 1: some nasty rumors, which I don't know why they have

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Speaker 1: to be nasty rumors. Those could be really cool rumors,

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Speaker 1: but based on the way America has treated people of color, uh,

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Speaker 1: they were pretty nasty rumors. And Dwight Eisenhower and Warring

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Speaker 1: Hardened uh spent a long part of their lives probably

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Speaker 1: trying to fight that and and murder people who called

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Speaker 1: them monkey d and and a b R thing. I

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Speaker 1: don't know what type of old time eracists they probably were,

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Speaker 1: but they I'm sure they said mean things about them

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Speaker 1: being mixed. Anyway, those two fellas, it doesn't seem like, uh,

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Speaker 1: they they're black or or anything else other than just

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Speaker 1: they're just Pierre proud whites, you know, Pierre proud whites.

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Speaker 1: And you congratulations to those of you who are playing

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Speaker 1: at home if you were rooting for those two to

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Speaker 1: stay good proud white men, you get it. You you you

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Speaker 1: win the game. If this is a game. Now, let's

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Speaker 1: get into the other members of this list, because we've

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Speaker 1: got some good ones. Thomas Jefferson, as we all know,

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Speaker 1: loved black pussy. Couldn't get enough of it. I mean,

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Speaker 1: he loved it so much he would steal it from

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Speaker 1: the people who's pussy it belonged to. To be clear,

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Speaker 1: Thomas Jefferson was a rapist. But Thomas Jefferson was also

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Speaker 1: also a slave owner. Even though d his time as

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Speaker 1: president he was our third president, you fucking idiots. Even

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Speaker 1: though as our third president he banned international slave trade

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Speaker 1: and referred to slavery as quote unquote a moral depravity,

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Speaker 1: still he kept all six hundred of his slave. That's right,

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Speaker 1: six hundred, the sweet number of a man who hates slaves.

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Speaker 1: Six hundred slaves at the off chance that they had

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Speaker 1: and or knew how to get some more of that

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Speaker 1: delicious black pussy he loved so much. According though, to

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Speaker 1: historian J. A. Rogers in his publication The Five Black Presidents,

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Speaker 1: Jefferson's mother was and I'm quoting here these are not

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Speaker 1: my words out. Don't you dare attack me because of

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Speaker 1: this ship. He said his mother was half breed Indian

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Speaker 1: squaw and his father was a Virginia mulatto, which basically

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Speaker 1: means that Thomas Jefferson would look more like Mariah Carey

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Speaker 1: then Simon Cowell. Do you know what I mean? They've

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Speaker 1: been trying to pretend like he's just this oddly British

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Speaker 1: rooted man, and that motherfucker, Ah, he could hit a

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Speaker 1: false settle like no one else. You know. He was

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Speaker 1: a beautiful, a mixed woman, if you ask me, which

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Speaker 1: might also suggest why Thomas Jefferson had this taste for

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Speaker 1: black pussy. It seems like it was more genetic than

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Speaker 1: he and his supporters would care to admit. Now, let's

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Speaker 1: talk Old Abraham Lincoln. According to historian le Roy Vaughan

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Speaker 1: old half truth aide. I'm calling him half truth because

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Speaker 1: that Niga was lying. Old half truth. Abe had a

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Speaker 1: daddy who they say was black, and his mother may

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Speaker 1: have been of Ethiopian descent, and it, as it turns out,

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Speaker 1: and this part came as a major surprise, because you

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Speaker 1: can accuse anybody of of being black. But as it

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Speaker 1: turns out, there is a fair amount of evidence to

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Speaker 1: suggest that he had much darker skin and coarser hair

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Speaker 1: than his pictures might lead us to believe. So much

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Speaker 1: so that when he was running for public office, his

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Speaker 1: rivals referred to him as Abraham Africa canists the first whoa,

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Holy sh it, And that's funny.

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Speaker 1: I gotta give it to him. That's pretty funny. It's

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Speaker 1: very funny to think that Abraham Lincoln was showing up

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Speaker 1: to these debates with like a plan to discuss real

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Speaker 1: policy changes and financial goals for our country, and then

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Speaker 1: the other dude would just walk up to the bodium

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Speaker 1: and be like nigger tall as African, nigger, you stupid

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Speaker 1: African there. And that was a fair debate back then,

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Speaker 1: and Age just had to dodge them blows Now this

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Speaker 1: does remind me, however, of the ways that there has

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Speaker 1: throughout history been an intentional redrawing of historical figures. If

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Speaker 1: Abraham Lincoln did in fact have coarse hair and dark skin,

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Speaker 1: we've never seen imagery of this dark skinned, coarse haired person,

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Speaker 1: and it's very similar. Reminds me of the way that

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Speaker 1: we have seen images of Frederick Douglas, who was also

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Speaker 1: supposedly a very mixed race and very light skin, and

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Speaker 1: he has been made to look much more intentionally dark

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Speaker 1: skinned and clearly black in order to sell the truth

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Speaker 1: that the world wanted to see him as you know,

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Speaker 1: they wanted him to be this heroic black figure, so

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Speaker 1: they drew him as a heroic black figure. But we

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Speaker 1: don't have a lot of documentation to prove what Frederick

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Speaker 1: Douglas actually looked like. In the same seems to be

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Speaker 1: true for Abraham Lincoln. That motherfucker had a big, old

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Speaker 1: wide African nose, so much so that they needed to

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Speaker 1: debate about it. Now, next person up, I don't know

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Speaker 1: much about Calvin Coolidge, and frankly, I mostly associate white

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Speaker 1: people named Alvin with that bumper sticker of that bad

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Speaker 1: little boy being on stuff that's what I know about

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Speaker 1: about white Calvin's. But that said, Calvin Coolidge apparently was

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Speaker 1: pretty open about his mother being a mixed Indian heritage,

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Speaker 1: and as it turns out, her maiden name happened to

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Speaker 1: be More, which if you've been studying at all, you

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Speaker 1: know more is like old timey European for black. That's

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Speaker 1: that's how they assigned that. You know, they're fancy with

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Speaker 1: their ship. We we' say black, they say more, but

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Speaker 1: they make a weird face and they you know, uh,

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Speaker 1: spilled tee because it's upsetting to them. This brings us

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Speaker 1: We've covered most of them. This brings us to my

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Speaker 1: absolute favorite president of all time, the person I'm most

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Speaker 1: excited to talk about, which is you know him, you

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Speaker 1: love him? It's my man Andrew Jackson. Oh, I love

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Speaker 1: Andrew Jackson. He's my absolute favorite. Now. You know Andrew

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Speaker 1: Jackson best for murder where he was. He murdered a

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Speaker 1: lot of people. He specifically Native Americans. Boy did he who?

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Speaker 1: He went ham on the old Native Americans. He also

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Speaker 1: murdered a fair amount of of other people, and he

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Speaker 1: even shot a man to death for accusing him of

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Speaker 1: cheating on a horse race. You know, he killed tens

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Speaker 1: of thousands of Cherokee Native Americans who inhabited the south

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Speaker 1: of our country and displaced the remaining members of that

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Speaker 1: tribe so that he could offer that land to other

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Speaker 1: white settlers. And Andrew Jackson, that wasn't where he stopped.

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Speaker 1: Murder wasn't his only game. He also was a slave

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Speaker 1: owner and a pretty shitty president who at one point

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Speaker 1: even teamed up with the Postmaster General to figure out

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Speaker 1: a way to keep slaves from receiving mail from the

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Speaker 1: North at the chance that this is possibly people trying

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Speaker 1: to help them to freedom. Not a great guy, But

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Speaker 1: here's why he's my absolute favorite president, because apparently Jackson

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Speaker 1: was behaving this way. He did all this ship despite

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Speaker 1: the fact that his father was allegedly black and his

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Speaker 1: older brother was even said to have been sold into slavery.

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Speaker 1: So Andrew Jackson, to me, is the perfect embodiment of

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Speaker 1: what the American president actually is. He, unlike any other

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Speaker 1: president throughout history, never winced at what his responsibilities were,

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Speaker 1: which was murdered. Every president is killing people, but this

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Speaker 1: guy was the only one that would have the gall

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Speaker 1: to be proud of it. Everybody else is sitting around

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Speaker 1: pretending that they're not doing drone strikes and that they

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Speaker 1: care about the the the well being of the poor

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Speaker 1: in this country. And this motherfucker was like, no, I'll

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Speaker 1: eat a baby alive. I don't give a ship, and

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Speaker 1: especially if it's a black or a Native American child,

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Speaker 1: I fucking hate their guts. That's a good president, not

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Speaker 1: a good person. Don't let's not confuse my suggestion here.

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Speaker 1: He is bad man, a bad man who should burn

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Speaker 1: in whatever version of hell you believe in. But boy,

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Speaker 1: oh boy, was he a sensational president. And I wouldn't

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Speaker 1: vote for him because woof, I don't need that kind

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Speaker 1: of stress. But big fan over here, me and Donald Jerry,

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Speaker 1: I think fans of Andrew Jackson, I think for different reasons,

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Speaker 1: but you know, it works out either way anyway, Brandon,

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Speaker 1: I think I've covered the entire conversation. I think your

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Speaker 1: suggestion of their being mixed race president seems to be

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Speaker 1: pretty true. They're not as mixed as we would like

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Speaker 1: them to be, and they're certainly not as proud of it,

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Speaker 1: except that old cool ass Calvin Coolidge. But you know,

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Speaker 1: they that seems to be the way that we treat

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Speaker 1: black people in this country in general. Everybody's got some

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Speaker 1: taste of our our experience, our culture, and everybody's pretending

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Speaker 1: that they don't have anything to do with it. Boy,

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Speaker 1: oh boy, I have to imagine that history is gonna

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Speaker 1: keep repeating itself, and this is just a sad reflection

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Speaker 1: of us staring back at a slightly distorted mirror that

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Speaker 1: we created. Anyway, if you want to send me your

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Speaker 1: thoughts on people who might be hiding their blackness, if

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Speaker 1: you want to bring people out of their chocolate ass closet,

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Speaker 1: send me. Send me your messages to my mama pot

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Speaker 1: at gmail dot com. I would love to hear from you. Otherwise,

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Speaker 1: follow me at Langston Kerman and I'll miss you always.

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Speaker 1: By bitch. Motherfucking many years, so, motherfucking many years, so,

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Speaker 1: motherfucking many years, so, motherfucking miniyearisode