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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam, this is John, and we are

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Speaker 1: the founding hosts of Okay Storytime podcast and we have

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Speaker 1: some foundational stories coming up for you. But the thing

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Speaker 1: is this foundation needs a little support from these sponsors.

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Speaker 1: So stick around two minutes. We'll get into the episode.

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Speaker 2: I think my husband is having an affair. He's been

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Speaker 2: getting flirty messages on Instagram.

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Speaker 3: He's got the right idea, he is.

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Speaker 2: His dms are flooded with the hotties. Me here's some background.

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Speaker 2: We've been married for three years and we have an

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Speaker 2: almost two year old daughter who and there's Kean's head.

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Speaker 2: Our marriage is not without your typical disagreements and moments

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Speaker 2: of humanity, but it is otherwise great. He is a

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Speaker 2: great husband and father, and I have never doubted him

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Speaker 2: or his fidelity. By the way, this comes from user's

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Speaker 2: Suspicious Wife throwaway, and if you want to submit your

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Speaker 2: own stories, go to the r slash Okay Storytime subreddit.

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna go right now, I'm going, he's going. So, However,

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Speaker 2: today I picked up his phone to Google something. He

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Speaker 2: has a passcode, but we know each other's passcodes, and

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Speaker 2: his Instagram was open. I don't have one, so I

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Speaker 2: scrolled through his pictures. He has a bunch of us,

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Speaker 2: our daughter, his parents, working out, he is a personal

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Speaker 2: trainer at a gym, and food. Nothing weird or suspicious.

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Speaker 2: But then I saw a message pop up that said, sorry,

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Speaker 2: I missed you today. I was in a rush. Let's

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Speaker 2: catch up another time. It was from a girl. Ooo,

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Speaker 2: I'll allow this. I will allow this to continue for now.

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Speaker 2: You're the reason.

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Speaker 3: I'm the reason we have those two facts.

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Speaker 2: It was from a girl who, from the looks of

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Speaker 2: her Instagram, is maybe in her early to mid twenties,

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Speaker 2: very attractive, and goes to his gym. I know this

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Speaker 2: is somewhat wrong, but I couldn't help myself. I looked

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Speaker 2: through their previous messages, starting from late October, and it

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Speaker 2: goes like this. Oh, bear with me as I go

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Speaker 2: through this timeline.

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Speaker 3: You want to be the husband.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'll be the husband and you'll be I'll be

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Speaker 2: the mysterious, strange, deeky strength girl. Freaky deeky strength girl.

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Speaker 2: Here we go. Husband sends a promotional picture of an

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Speaker 2: event to the gym. Hey, hope you'll make it. We'd

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Speaker 2: love to have you there, girl.

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Speaker 3: Hi, looks fun. I don't have any friends who are

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Speaker 3: interested in fitness. But maybe I'll go.

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Speaker 2: Hmmm, husband, you should make more friends who are inclined

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Speaker 2: to exercise. Here's my number, engaged to need anything types

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Speaker 2: his number. I checked his text history, which is wrong,

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Speaker 2: I know, and it doesn't look like they've texted or called,

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Speaker 2: but the time stamp on their Instagram inbox history shows

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Speaker 2: that a week later, she restarted or continued the conversation

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Speaker 2: by saying, girl, just.

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Speaker 3: Purchase my ticket.

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Speaker 2: Awesome, I'm confident it will be a fun night. And

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Speaker 2: about a week after that, which is two nights ago,

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Speaker 2: Friday is the event. I knew about it before I

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Speaker 2: found these messages, as it's an annual event and I

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Speaker 2: chose not to go this year, but my husband went anyway.

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Speaker 2: He didn't act or dressed suspiciously before or after he

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Speaker 2: went out. But based on the time stamp, I found

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Speaker 2: out that after he came home he messaged her again

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Speaker 2: and the conversation is this, husband, hope you enjoyed the event.

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Speaker 2: Let's hang out sometime, girl. I did.

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Speaker 3: It was a ton of fun and yeah, sure great.

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Speaker 2: Want to grab a bite or go bowling? When are

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Speaker 2: you free? Oh?

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Speaker 3: I'm usually free on the weekends. I'll be at the

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Speaker 3: gym tomorrow. Let's chat.

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Speaker 2: Then sounds good, And then minutes ago.

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Speaker 3: The girl, Uh, sorry, I missed you today. I was

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Speaker 3: in a rush. Let's catch up another time.

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Speaker 2: M m my, my.

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Speaker 3: Girl voice is really good.

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Speaker 2: M oh yeah, you're a good girl. Keon all right?

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Speaker 2: Anyway back to the story. After reading those pacific messages,

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Speaker 2: I started freaking out. He has not mentioned this girl

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Speaker 2: to me, And although it only seems like they just

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Speaker 2: started being friendly or flirty a couple of days ago,

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Speaker 2: I'm feeling ill just thinking about them being together at

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Speaker 2: the event. I have no reason not to trust my husband.

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Speaker 2: But is this now a reason? Yes? Yes, I would

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Speaker 2: say yes. Do you say yes? No?

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Speaker 3: I'm still stuck on what you said earlier, actual lot,

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Speaker 3: still stuck on what you said earlier that.

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Speaker 2: You're a good girl.

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Speaker 3: Go ahead, you do.

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Speaker 2: That was a good girl voice. You were a good girl.

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Speaker 2: Go ahead, continue reading. I just wanted to. I mean,

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Speaker 2: is this now a reason?

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Speaker 3: Though?

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Speaker 2: Is this? Would you would you not trust? Would you

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Speaker 2: not trust this? I don't think I would trust this.

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Speaker 3: I don't trust this.

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Speaker 2: Going on a bowling date without telling your partner about

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Speaker 2: it is suspicious.

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Speaker 3: I thought, I thought it was like, oh, all, all

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Speaker 3: is good because he's just getting hurt in the gym

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Speaker 3: and he just wants to get more. And yeah, but

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Speaker 3: the fact that he's like, let's hang out after the gym,

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Speaker 3: let's go bowling, let's go bowling.

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Speaker 2: Let's go bowling, is crazy.

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Speaker 3: That's crazy work. There is like grabbing a bite after

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Speaker 3: the gym is one thing. Yeah, that's like, Okay, it's

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Speaker 3: a little iffy. But the let's go bowling or hangout

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Speaker 3: after the gym with like exclusive activities that are really

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Speaker 3: fun without a pee.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: And if it's a group of that's if it's a

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Speaker 3: group of people from the gym, that's one thing. But

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Speaker 3: it seems like it was one on one.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it does. It seems like it sounds like let's

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Speaker 2: go to the bowling alley and throw some balls around.

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Speaker 3: It sounds like it's a date.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I would be suspicious of your boy for going

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Speaker 2: on dates. Yes, so he is my boyfriend. Of course,

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Speaker 2: allowed to have friends of all genders as am I,

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Speaker 2: but I feel uncomfortable that he gave her his number.

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Speaker 3: I think it's husband.

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Speaker 2: I think he was boyfriend. Was it? Oh god, it's

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Speaker 2: it's husband. Yes, it's husband. Oh, yes, this is weird,

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Speaker 2: but I feel uncomfortable that he gave her his number

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Speaker 2: and asked to hang out. She must know he's married

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Speaker 2: with a daughter because of the pictures, but I don't know.

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Speaker 2: Maybe they're into each other. What do you think? Is

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Speaker 2: this a conversation an affair waiting to happen? And what

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Speaker 2: should I do confront him? Oh there's an update. Oh

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Speaker 2: here is my eye opening and cathartic update, at least

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Speaker 2: the one I'm allowed within forty eight hours divorce calling

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Speaker 2: it divorce. Thank you all for your helpful replies and advice.

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Speaker 2: I really needed an unbiased opinion to help me sort

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Speaker 2: through my thoughts. I had an awful night's sleep. My

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Speaker 2: husband fell asleep while I was showering, so fortunately or unfortunately,

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Speaker 2: I wasn't able to confront Hi last tie, and unfortunately

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Speaker 2: I woke up feeling worse. Bear with me, as I'm

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Speaker 2: riding this through tears and am very emotional, more so

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Speaker 2: than yesterday. After some of your replies calmed me down,

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Speaker 2: and I decided to look at his phone this morning

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Speaker 2: while he was in the shower to see if he

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Speaker 2: had replied to her message. And this is what I

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Speaker 2: found husband in reply to her last message, I'm sorry too,

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Speaker 2: smile emoji, hope you had a great weekend. Are you

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Speaker 2: free anytime next weekend or this week after? Six? Husband?

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Speaker 2: Keep up what you're doing. You look great girl.

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Speaker 3: I got sick from being out and cold on Friday.

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Speaker 3: I'm free whens or sat. Oh?

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Speaker 2: Sorry to hear that. I hope you feel better soon.

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Speaker 3: The fact that she rat, the fact she won't even

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Speaker 3: just say like Wednesday, I feel like she would say

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Speaker 3: like wednes are sad.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I feel like I abbreviate Wednesday every time

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Speaker 2: I've ever texted this. Who's got time to type out

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Speaker 2: the entire word wendnes.

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Speaker 3: Day, wedness day?

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Speaker 2: Okay, wedness day. Sorry if that's scared anybody. Sorry to

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Speaker 2: hear that. I hope you feel better soon, and that's great.

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Speaker 2: Does dinner wens ask six thirty work for you?

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Speaker 3: Thanks? I hope I get better soon too. That time

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Speaker 3: works for me. Will any other members such traders be

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Speaker 3: joining us? We should make it a group.

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Speaker 2: Big.

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Speaker 3: I see the same people at the gym all the time,

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Speaker 3: but I don't really know anyone.

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Speaker 2: Husband. I hadn't asked anyone else because I wanted to

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Speaker 2: take you on a day to the bowling alley. Bah

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Speaker 2: hang out with my colleagues occasionally, but not regularly. I

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Speaker 2: had in mind to get to know you better, your

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Speaker 2: gym experiences and such. If that's okay, we could do

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Speaker 2: names a mid range restaurant.

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Speaker 3: Ah, yes, oh okay, gotcha sounds good. See you Wednesday

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Speaker 3: at six thirty.

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Speaker 2: Oh great, gives her the address to the restaurant. Be well.

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Speaker 2: Until then, it shows that she's seen the message, but

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Speaker 2: she has yet to reply. But I'm done. I'm done

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Speaker 2: checking messages because it's more than enough to ask him

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Speaker 2: what the f is going on? He's telling her she

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Speaker 2: looks great. He asked her out to this restaurant with

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Speaker 2: the lowest price for an appetizer seventeen dollars. He wants

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Speaker 2: to get to know her better. He still hasn't told

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Speaker 2: me about it. Slash her and some of you are

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Speaker 2: saying she doesn't seem interested, but she agreed to it.

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Speaker 2: Oh and fun fact, I found out she's twenty six.

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Speaker 2: I'm shaking and crying and I still can't even tell

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Speaker 2: if I'm overreacting. He has posted videos of his clients

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Speaker 2: exercising before, describing them as beautiful or hot and fit

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Speaker 2: in the captions. Yeah, but this is not that. This

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Speaker 2: is different.

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Speaker 3: He hasn't told you anything about this, and he's making

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Speaker 3: exclusive plans with a female.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it was it's over for me. It was over

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Speaker 2: the moment that she goes, oh, yeah, so maybe we

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Speaker 2: make it a group thing and he goes, no, no,

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Speaker 2: I don't want it to be a group thing. I'm

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Speaker 2: trying to go with you.

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Speaker 3: She's trying to suss it out. And maybe because she's

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Speaker 3: trying to be like, oh, let's make it all.

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Speaker 2: She's down with it. Now. That's exactly what she.

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Speaker 3: Was doing because this is a trainer. But maybe she's

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Speaker 3: like no, you know, like maybe during thedor like do

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Speaker 3: you have a wife and kid?

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Speaker 2: Well, it sounded like that was her thought, but like,

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Speaker 2: I don't know, it seems like maybe she's too. Before

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Speaker 2: we read it, he did kind of cover though, like

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Speaker 2: it was like, oh, I just want to get to

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Speaker 2: know about your gym experience. Like I don't know, man,

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Speaker 2: that's weird.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, can do that at the gym.

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Speaker 2: At the very least, he is certainly trying to do

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Speaker 2: something to Farius here. That's what it's really.

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Speaker 3: You can get to know each other at the gym.

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Speaker 3: It's not all grunts and yeah yeah, one more rep. Well,

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Speaker 3: it's like no, hey, yeah, where did you go to

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Speaker 3: the gym before this? Or like what did you do

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Speaker 3: in college?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, there's also no reason that you can't learn about

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Speaker 2: her gym experience in a group of people. That's what

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Speaker 2: I'm saying.

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Speaker 3: Who would all be talking about that, That's what I'm saying.

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Speaker 2: So my husband will be home in about four hours,

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Speaker 2: my daughter is at my mom's, and I just returned

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Speaker 2: from work reliving what I discovered this morning. As I

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Speaker 2: type this, I truly do not know how to approach

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Speaker 2: this situation non confrontationally to get the honest truth out

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Speaker 2: of him. I'm that livid and confused. I never thought

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Speaker 2: I would be here in this dilemma, but here I am.

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Speaker 2: Just thought i'd update How should I approach him? Now?

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Speaker 2: And there are comments? Let's get into them. Comment one.

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Speaker 2: I have several friends that have been professional trainers for

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Speaker 2: twenty plus years in a competitive market in New York City.

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Speaker 2: None of them would blur or across the boundaries to

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Speaker 2: gain new clients by asking to spend private time away

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Speaker 2: from the gym for bowling and getting together.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, the bowling thing is just so weird.

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Speaker 2: Bowling. Bowling is the most like, once you're an adult,

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Speaker 2: you just that's a date thing. You don't do that

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Speaker 2: for just kicks.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. I know trainers who are like, oh, right after

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Speaker 3: we work out, we're gonna go to like the closest,

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Speaker 3: you know, restaurant and as a group, like hang out

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Speaker 3: and have a.

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Speaker 2: Good time, right as a group.

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Speaker 3: And I would invite my partners or my partner if

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Speaker 3: you you know, if you're the trainers or like the

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Speaker 3: trainers would invite their partners.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you would write.

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Speaker 3: Your partner to hang out with the group.

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Speaker 2: My wife would be there with me. Wif so your

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Speaker 2: husband is asking this lady for a date, I'm sorry

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Speaker 2: if that is hard to read. What is extra creepy

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Speaker 2: and disturbing on an entirely other level is the age difference.

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Speaker 2: For a guy in his fifties to be asking out

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Speaker 2: a woman in her early to mid twenties is upsetting.

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Speaker 2: I'm sorry to say this, but it seems as if

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Speaker 2: you might have missed some red flags, as his behavior

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Speaker 2: usually doesn't just happen. Also, the fact that you want

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Speaker 2: to find some logical explanation indicates you're in denial about

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Speaker 2: the reality of your relationship. No matter how this turns out,

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Speaker 2: I would sincerely think about seeing a relationship counselor therapist

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Speaker 2: to help you develop a stronger sense of self esteem.

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Speaker 2: There is a reply that I agree. I was a

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Speaker 2: personal trainer for ten years. Crossing a line from professional

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Speaker 2: in the gym to hanging out outside the gym is

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Speaker 2: a big no note unless he's expecting her to commit

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Speaker 2: to training and cut him a check while dining or bowling.

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Speaker 2: This doesn't look good, and we have an update straight

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Speaker 2: into it. Straight into the update, folks, thank you all

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Speaker 2: for your helpful advice and supportive slash sympathetic words. I

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Speaker 2: want to provide an update as to what transpired since

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Speaker 2: my last post. I wasn't sure if I wanted to

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Speaker 2: post an update because I don't think I'm handling this

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Speaker 2: well or valiantly. I didn't pack up his clothes, or

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Speaker 2: call a divorce layer or do anything but feel sorry

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Speaker 2: for myself. So I'm a bit embarrassed. Which it's okay, Ope,

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Speaker 2: don't be embarrassed. We love you. But I've decided writing

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Speaker 2: it out might help. This is a long story, and

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Speaker 2: this is what happened Monday night. I waited for my

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Speaker 2: husband to come home after work, and he walked in

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Speaker 2: around nine. He was acting totally normal, and I waited

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Speaker 2: for him to change into his relaxation clothes to be

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Speaker 2: less confrontational. Our daughter was at my mom's. When he

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Speaker 2: sat across from me at the dining room table, we

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Speaker 2: just talked casually, and then I said, Hey, so I

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Speaker 2: was googling Xyz on your phone and your Instagram was open.

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Speaker 2: While I was looking through your pictures, this girl messaged you.

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Speaker 2: Is she new to the gym? He looked confused, and

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Speaker 2: I tried to look neutral because I didn't want him

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Speaker 2: gauging responses based on my reaction. After a few seconds,

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Speaker 2: he was like, oh, yeah, like her. This stranger's name.

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Speaker 2: She's not really that new, but she's been going there

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Speaker 2: a lot recently, and I wanted to get to know

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Speaker 2: what she was about and how she's been fitting in

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Speaker 2: at the gym. I know my husband is friendly and

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Speaker 2: will often randomly chat up strangers, but like you guys know,

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Speaker 2: I felt weird about this, so I basically told him

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Speaker 2: I saw their messages to meet up on Wednesday and

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Speaker 2: asked if she was going to be a new client

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Speaker 2: of his. He is an independent trainer at this gym.

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Speaker 2: The gym has its own membership, but he works on

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Speaker 2: his own in that space. At first he said maybe,

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Speaker 2: and then when I pointed out that she didn't mention

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Speaker 2: interest in personal training in the messages, he was like, oh, well,

301
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Speaker 2: uh no, she wants to be a gym member, not

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Speaker 2: a client of mine. I asked him why he didn't

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Speaker 2: mention her or the dinner to me, and he said

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Speaker 2: he didn't think there was anything to mention.

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Speaker 3: But oh, oh that lie.

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Speaker 2: That is a lie.

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Speaker 3: Oh that's a yeah.

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Speaker 2: Where is it? Do the thing I want to do it?

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Speaker 2: The thing liar whose pants are on fire.

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Speaker 3: Already burned off.

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Speaker 2: So at this point I dropped it. I felt like

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Speaker 2: I was handling this badly and that I was grasping

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Speaker 2: its straws for the sake of continuing this conversation. But

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Speaker 2: it's like it's because you were giving him the out. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: you were confronting him and then being like, but you're

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Speaker 2: probably just doing this because she's a client, right, or

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Speaker 2: it's like you were, but it was probably just for this, right.

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Speaker 3: And you gave like the way you intererograted him it's

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Speaker 3: like you gave him the options. You're like, all right

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Speaker 3: in the dialogue, you get this is your client, right

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Speaker 3: yes or no?

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah? Yeah, oh yeah. Yeah. It's a great idea.

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Speaker 2: I mean that's a yeah, that is what she is. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and she's trying to be part of like she

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Speaker 3: gonna be your client yes or no?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, no, no, yeah, yeah, she's gonna be a member

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Speaker 2: of the gym. So like no, but like yeah, and

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Speaker 2: maybe we'll just go bowling once. Maybe maybe once.

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Speaker 3: We'll go trying to get her to be playing.

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Speaker 2: It's for the It's a great forearm workout. It's that's

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Speaker 2: all it is.

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Speaker 3: We were trying to shake for arm. I'm just trying

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Speaker 3: to show hard to use a shake weight.

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Speaker 2: So we did not speak about it for the rest

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Speaker 2: of the night, except when he asked me randomly before

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Speaker 2: bad so, what are you mad about? I asked him

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Speaker 2: why he thought I was mad, and he just said,

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Speaker 2: I've been acting strange ever since he mentioned the girl.

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Speaker 2: I said it was nothing, and that was that Wednesday night.

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Speaker 2: I decided to trust my husband and keep my faith

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Speaker 2: in him and did not bring it up at all.

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Speaker 2: The next day. Wednesday morning, I asked if he's still

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Speaker 2: going out to meet this girl, and he says, yeah,

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Speaker 2: and I might go out with some of the other trainers. Again,

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Speaker 2: I decided to be trusting because he's my husband, and

346
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Speaker 2: why would I doubt every word he's saying. Wednesday night

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Speaker 2: came and I tried so hard not to think about

348
00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:58,920
Speaker 2: what they're talking about or doing, et cetera. I kept

349
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Speaker 2: reminding myself that he he didn't lie to me, so

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Speaker 2: it's not fishy or weird.

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Speaker 3: He's he lied to you already. He already been lying

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Speaker 3: to you.

353
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Speaker 2: It's like you aren't lying. You're doing some mental gymnastics

354
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Speaker 2: here to come to that conclusion. I think.

355
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Speaker 3: I think it's opey trying to not jump at the

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Speaker 3: conclusion here.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, it's like it's the reason that you gave

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Speaker 2: him all of his responses.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, when you confronted him.

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Speaker 2: Oh, okay, let's keep going. But then nine thirty pm

361
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Speaker 2: rolls around and I'm freaking out on the inside. So

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Speaker 2: I text him, Hey, hope your meeting's going well. Aren't

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Speaker 2: you going to be home soon? He replies forty five

364
00:15:31,880 --> 00:15:35,120
Speaker 2: minutes later, saying yep, I'm in a cab right now,

365
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Speaker 2: him coming in at eleven is not unusual. Sometimes he

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Speaker 2: works until ten. Sometimes he hangs out with long term

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Speaker 2: clients who are always men. However, when he gets home,

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Speaker 2: I asked him if he had a good time and

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Speaker 2: what they talked about, and if she was liking the

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Speaker 2: gym and wanted to be a client. I was trying

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Speaker 2: to sound like I assumed it was professional. All he

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Speaker 2: told me was that they talked about her eating, slash

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Speaker 2: exercise lifestyle, his clients, and travel. Again, I decided not

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Speaker 2: to press the issue Thursday. Something still wasn't sitting right

375
00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:03,880
Speaker 2: with me that next day, and I checked his text

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00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:06,840
Speaker 2: messages that evening while he was exercising. So much for

377
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Speaker 2: faith and not checking messages, right, I mean, but you

378
00:16:09,720 --> 00:16:12,160
Speaker 2: do have kind of a good context to base that.

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00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:15,240
Speaker 3: Off of, yeah, he's not good, but it's the gut. Yeah,

380
00:16:15,280 --> 00:16:19,040
Speaker 3: instinct is telling you something's not right there, and it's true.

381
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Speaker 3: Trust your gut.

382
00:16:19,720 --> 00:16:22,600
Speaker 2: It's your your husband should be taking women on dates

383
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Speaker 2: to the bowling alley.

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Speaker 3: She'd be taking you on dates to the bowling alley exactly.

385
00:16:26,640 --> 00:16:28,560
Speaker 2: Like if she was just involved in this, if it

386
00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:30,720
Speaker 2: was like, oh, yeah, let's you want to go bowling,

387
00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:33,320
Speaker 2: you can meet like my family. Sure, whatever, I'll I'll

388
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Speaker 2: take my wife and my kid to the bowling alley

389
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Speaker 2: and we can maybe talk fitness. Because it is true,

390
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Speaker 2: there is to some level, like if you're gonna have

391
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Speaker 2: a good relationship relationship with a physical personal trainer or

392
00:16:43,880 --> 00:16:45,400
Speaker 2: like you do need like it, there needs to be

393
00:16:45,440 --> 00:16:47,560
Speaker 2: a trust there. There needs to be a level of chemistry.

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Speaker 3: Also needs to be like a personal level. And I

395
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Speaker 3: get them, That's what I said. Like I know some

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Speaker 3: trainers or some people who will literally hang out with

397
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Speaker 3: their clients, but it would be like their clients, not

398
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Speaker 3: a single client. Yeah, or like hey all the trainers

399
00:16:59,080 --> 00:17:00,920
Speaker 3: and some of the people were there. They all go

400
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Speaker 3: to the nearest like restaurant or like local bar and

401
00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:06,160
Speaker 3: like hang out with all their families. They'll get together,

402
00:17:06,280 --> 00:17:08,040
Speaker 3: not just two people. Do This makes sense.

403
00:17:07,880 --> 00:17:10,359
Speaker 2: Exactly more than just the one on one at the

404
00:17:10,440 --> 00:17:13,280
Speaker 2: very least. Here's what I found in the messages the

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Speaker 2: girl on Wednesday evening, Hey.

406
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Speaker 3: I'm on my way, but maybe a few minutes late.

407
00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:20,320
Speaker 2: Oh okay, I'll be there in five and then him

408
00:17:20,359 --> 00:17:23,120
Speaker 2: at twelve or six am on what is now technically Thursday,

409
00:17:23,200 --> 00:17:25,400
Speaker 2: about an hour and a half after he got home Hey,

410
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Speaker 2: hope you got home safely. Thanks for sharing time with me.

411
00:17:28,440 --> 00:17:30,800
Speaker 2: I really enjoyed your company much more than I would

412
00:17:30,840 --> 00:17:33,399
Speaker 2: have imagined. I hope I can see you soon. How

413
00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:37,639
Speaker 2: about Saturday? And then girl responds, yeah, this is not good.

414
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Speaker 2: Not good.

415
00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:41,639
Speaker 3: Eight thirty am. Hey, my pleasure. Thanks again for dinner.

416
00:17:41,680 --> 00:17:44,600
Speaker 3: I have a potluck on Saturday, but maybe another day.

417
00:17:44,640 --> 00:17:46,760
Speaker 2: And when I checked again about an hour later to

418
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Speaker 2: see if he answered, the messages were deleted.

419
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Speaker 3: Oh it's over, Well it's over, it's over.

420
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Speaker 2: That gutted me. I was really upset by what I found,

421
00:17:55,040 --> 00:17:57,080
Speaker 2: and I decided to speak to someone not a marriage

422
00:17:57,119 --> 00:17:59,600
Speaker 2: counselor yet, so I called my brother and told him

423
00:17:59,680 --> 00:18:01,920
Speaker 2: every thing. One of the reasons I wrote on here

424
00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:05,400
Speaker 2: was because the anonymity makes it easy to admit embarrassing

425
00:18:05,520 --> 00:18:08,040
Speaker 2: things like your husband might be having an affair. But

426
00:18:08,160 --> 00:18:10,280
Speaker 2: I feel like I need to tell someone close to me,

427
00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:12,920
Speaker 2: at least. My brother basically told me that he thinks

428
00:18:12,920 --> 00:18:14,960
Speaker 2: my husband has a crush on this woman, and that

429
00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:17,600
Speaker 2: either she doesn't know he's married or is looking to

430
00:18:17,640 --> 00:18:19,640
Speaker 2: make friends at the gym. He doesn't wear a wedding

431
00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:21,840
Speaker 2: band when he trains, by the way, and needs to

432
00:18:21,920 --> 00:18:24,520
Speaker 2: not be friends with my husband. Oh and I need

433
00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:27,240
Speaker 2: to shut it down. I know crushes happen theoretically, but

434
00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:30,840
Speaker 2: the idea was crushing me. So this morning Friday, I

435
00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:33,080
Speaker 2: told my husband I want to talk to him after work,

436
00:18:33,119 --> 00:18:34,560
Speaker 2: and so when he gets home in a bit, I'm

437
00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:37,119
Speaker 2: going to tell him everything I know, but more importantly,

438
00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:39,760
Speaker 2: how I feel about this situation. And we do have

439
00:18:39,760 --> 00:18:42,199
Speaker 2: an update. Honestly, what would you I don't know if

440
00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:44,400
Speaker 2: I think I would at this point just.

441
00:18:44,320 --> 00:18:47,800
Speaker 3: Call him out. The fact that he messaged again, he

442
00:18:47,840 --> 00:18:50,880
Speaker 3: had those messages on his phone again and then deleted them.

443
00:18:51,080 --> 00:18:51,440
Speaker 3: He hasn't.

444
00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:54,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like you need to not be soft about it.

445
00:18:54,560 --> 00:18:56,399
Speaker 2: If you're going to confront him now, it needs to

446
00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:58,760
Speaker 2: be like, Hey, are you trying to cheat on me

447
00:18:58,840 --> 00:19:01,359
Speaker 2: with this girl? I know I've seen the messages. You

448
00:19:01,440 --> 00:19:04,639
Speaker 2: know that they were bad. You deleted them them. You

449
00:19:04,760 --> 00:19:05,600
Speaker 2: know they were bad.

450
00:19:06,080 --> 00:19:08,440
Speaker 3: If I were op, I would have screens for them, right, Yeah,

451
00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:09,400
Speaker 3: just to have the evidence.

452
00:19:09,520 --> 00:19:10,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, so just to have it.

453
00:19:10,800 --> 00:19:13,080
Speaker 3: I hope she did, but if not, you at least

454
00:19:13,119 --> 00:19:14,360
Speaker 3: have the mental image in your head.

455
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:16,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, you have the evidence of I know what I saw.

456
00:19:16,880 --> 00:19:17,880
Speaker 2: You can't lie to me.

457
00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:20,320
Speaker 3: And then get the girl's Instagram or what, oh she

458
00:19:20,359 --> 00:19:23,320
Speaker 3: doesn't have Instagram, but get the girl's information. Yeah, like, hey,

459
00:19:23,440 --> 00:19:24,560
Speaker 3: I'm his wife.

460
00:19:24,280 --> 00:19:26,080
Speaker 2: Might be trying to Might be time to drop the

461
00:19:26,119 --> 00:19:27,160
Speaker 2: big w on her.

462
00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:29,600
Speaker 3: The fact that in the message, like when he told ope,

463
00:19:30,040 --> 00:19:33,280
Speaker 3: oh yeah, dinner was great. We talked about this and travel,

464
00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:35,080
Speaker 3: but not about you or my daughter.

465
00:19:35,560 --> 00:19:39,120
Speaker 2: Right, huge red flag. Yeah, here's the update from that night.

466
00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:42,280
Speaker 2: I told my husband everything that I saw the text

467
00:19:42,320 --> 00:19:44,399
Speaker 2: messages too, that I think he has a crush on

468
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:46,800
Speaker 2: this girl and that I am unhappy with it, and

469
00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:49,080
Speaker 2: if he is committed to the marriage and his wife,

470
00:19:49,119 --> 00:19:51,920
Speaker 2: then he will stop all communication. At first, he kept

471
00:19:51,960 --> 00:19:54,240
Speaker 2: saying over and over that they're just new friends, that

472
00:19:54,320 --> 00:19:56,960
Speaker 2: why would she be interested anyway, and they weren't romantic

473
00:19:57,040 --> 00:19:59,480
Speaker 2: on basically the dinner that they went on, and that

474
00:19:59,520 --> 00:20:01,600
Speaker 2: she talked to other trainers at the gym, so it's

475
00:20:01,640 --> 00:20:03,320
Speaker 2: not like the two of them are only friends with

476
00:20:03,359 --> 00:20:06,240
Speaker 2: each other. So I pointed out that he pursued a

477
00:20:06,359 --> 00:20:08,720
Speaker 2: date with her, didn't tell me about her on his own,

478
00:20:08,840 --> 00:20:11,080
Speaker 2: like he should if she was an innocent friend. He

479
00:20:11,119 --> 00:20:14,000
Speaker 2: texts her flirty things like about enjoying her company, he

480
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:17,719
Speaker 2: asked out again, and then he deleted the messages and

481
00:20:17,840 --> 00:20:20,960
Speaker 2: all that stuff, and that is all inappropriate and just

482
00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:23,920
Speaker 2: flat out deception, lies and wrong in a marriage. He

483
00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:26,000
Speaker 2: kept on saying that he was just leading stuff off

484
00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:27,159
Speaker 2: his phone indiscriminately.

485
00:20:27,359 --> 00:20:32,400
Speaker 3: Shut up, no shot, no, shut up, stupid.

486
00:20:32,680 --> 00:20:34,480
Speaker 2: Who do you think do you think that, come on,

487
00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:39,560
Speaker 2: shut up, that he doesn't question me about stuff on

488
00:20:39,600 --> 00:20:43,000
Speaker 2: my phone? Well maybe because she's not cheating on you.

489
00:20:43,400 --> 00:20:45,480
Speaker 2: What an if this guy is? And that I need

490
00:20:45,480 --> 00:20:47,800
Speaker 2: to trust him and the kind of person he is.

491
00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:50,000
Speaker 2: He's always been a kind person who would give a

492
00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:51,840
Speaker 2: shirt off his back to help a friend. And he

493
00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:53,760
Speaker 2: wasn't serious about seeing her again.

494
00:20:53,880 --> 00:20:56,280
Speaker 3: Dude, shut up, shut up.

495
00:20:57,280 --> 00:20:59,239
Speaker 2: It's like the most pathetic thing to be like, Oh,

496
00:20:59,440 --> 00:21:01,199
Speaker 2: it's not like she was interested. It's like, yeah, but

497
00:21:01,240 --> 00:21:04,480
Speaker 2: you wanted her to be if she was interested. Yeah. Yeah.

498
00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:07,400
Speaker 2: So that's when I lost it and I just yelled

499
00:21:07,440 --> 00:21:10,199
Speaker 2: at him that that is a bold faced lie, that

500
00:21:10,240 --> 00:21:13,000
Speaker 2: he is cheating by being attracted to someone and pursuing

501
00:21:13,040 --> 00:21:15,960
Speaker 2: this attraction by spending time with her alone and flirting,

502
00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:18,760
Speaker 2: sending her texts at midnight, and that I never signed

503
00:21:18,840 --> 00:21:21,639
Speaker 2: up to marry a liar or an unfaithful man, and

504
00:21:21,640 --> 00:21:23,760
Speaker 2: that I was going to go for a separation. He

505
00:21:23,800 --> 00:21:26,960
Speaker 2: didn't even say anything to that, no reply, nothing. I

506
00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:29,800
Speaker 2: felt so defeated that I just started crying and I

507
00:21:29,880 --> 00:21:32,879
Speaker 2: stopped speaking, and he even kept trying to hug me

508
00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:35,359
Speaker 2: and console me. I didn't even want him to touch me.

509
00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:37,760
Speaker 2: So I asked, point Blake, do you like her? And

510
00:21:37,800 --> 00:21:40,680
Speaker 2: he said that yes, he does. That's when he broke down,

511
00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:44,119
Speaker 2: crying too, and kept apologizing over and over and saying

512
00:21:44,160 --> 00:21:46,680
Speaker 2: he feels guilty. I asked him if they slept together

513
00:21:46,760 --> 00:21:49,399
Speaker 2: or did anything physical, and he completely denied it. I

514
00:21:49,480 --> 00:21:51,919
Speaker 2: don't think they did, but why all of a sudden

515
00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:54,719
Speaker 2: feel guilty and my trust is broken? So I asked,

516
00:21:54,760 --> 00:21:56,600
Speaker 2: and he just kept saying that he thought she was

517
00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:58,720
Speaker 2: pretty and a nice person at the gym, and he

518
00:21:58,920 --> 00:22:00,760
Speaker 2: liked to hang around her. We talked about it for

519
00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:03,640
Speaker 2: a long time. I wanted to know all of the details,

520
00:22:03,680 --> 00:22:05,480
Speaker 2: so I asked if he told her he was married.

521
00:22:05,520 --> 00:22:08,000
Speaker 2: He said he didn't tell her explicitly, of course, but

522
00:22:08,080 --> 00:22:10,520
Speaker 2: she saw his Instagram, so she knows. I told him

523
00:22:10,520 --> 00:22:12,560
Speaker 2: again how much it hurts me and that they can't

524
00:22:12,600 --> 00:22:14,800
Speaker 2: be friends because of this that he needs to delete

525
00:22:14,840 --> 00:22:18,120
Speaker 2: her on Instagram and stop texting her. And by the way,

526
00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:22,000
Speaker 2: even if you somehow accidentally delete all of the apps

527
00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:23,840
Speaker 2: you use to watch us on your phone, you can

528
00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:28,120
Speaker 2: still listen to full episodes with stories like this. All

529
00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:31,719
Speaker 2: you have to do is go to your favorite Spotify,

530
00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:36,840
Speaker 2: your favorite Apple podcast, your favorite podcasting application.

531
00:22:37,119 --> 00:22:39,359
Speaker 3: Plenty of stuff out there and search.

532
00:22:39,720 --> 00:22:42,680
Speaker 2: Okay, story Time will be on it, that's for sure,

533
00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:46,359
Speaker 2: and there you can listen to the complete archives forty

534
00:22:46,359 --> 00:22:49,760
Speaker 2: eight days and it's still counting forty eight consecutive days,

535
00:22:49,920 --> 00:22:53,560
Speaker 2: so there is some story left here. Honestly, I think

536
00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:55,520
Speaker 2: we're probably both in the same page here. It's time

537
00:22:55,560 --> 00:22:55,840
Speaker 2: to leave.

538
00:22:55,880 --> 00:22:58,040
Speaker 3: He listen. I am a man of or I'm a

539
00:22:58,040 --> 00:23:00,919
Speaker 3: person of second chances. I believe it secon chance and

540
00:23:01,119 --> 00:23:03,560
Speaker 3: this is a big, big But they have a daughter.

541
00:23:03,560 --> 00:23:04,280
Speaker 3: I do have a daughter.

542
00:23:04,359 --> 00:23:07,320
Speaker 2: Oh, I forgot about the child. There's a child.

543
00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:12,720
Speaker 3: The trust is is rough. This is a rough, especially

544
00:23:12,760 --> 00:23:15,520
Speaker 3: since he denied it all at first and then still

545
00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:17,280
Speaker 3: went with it and then now being caught in the act.

546
00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:19,320
Speaker 3: Because how long would he have gone for this if

547
00:23:19,320 --> 00:23:20,000
Speaker 3: he wasn't caught.

548
00:23:20,480 --> 00:23:22,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's just like I don't know if i'd be

549
00:23:22,320 --> 00:23:24,560
Speaker 2: able to be like, well, what when you find someone

550
00:23:24,560 --> 00:23:27,520
Speaker 2: who is down to like hook up with you, then

551
00:23:27,520 --> 00:23:29,119
Speaker 2: you're just gonna cheat on me with that versa, And

552
00:23:29,160 --> 00:23:31,159
Speaker 2: then we don't We do not know if this is

553
00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:33,600
Speaker 2: the first time they tried to pursue something like this,

554
00:23:33,880 --> 00:23:37,000
Speaker 2: second time. Whatever, For the sake of the child, try

555
00:23:37,080 --> 00:23:40,240
Speaker 2: to work through it in therapy, in counseling of some kind.

556
00:23:40,359 --> 00:23:42,240
Speaker 3: It's it's it's if you're willing to put in the work.

557
00:23:42,359 --> 00:23:44,280
Speaker 2: It's definitely a mess right now.

558
00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:48,679
Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like let emotions, you know, emote, let them,

559
00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:51,720
Speaker 3: let them have their their time, and then once things subside,

560
00:23:51,840 --> 00:23:53,920
Speaker 3: really talk it out and see where you.

561
00:23:53,880 --> 00:23:56,240
Speaker 2: Go for your daughter. Yeah, that's that's where I say.

562
00:23:56,320 --> 00:23:59,160
Speaker 3: But if it's divorce, divorce, if you if the trust

563
00:23:59,160 --> 00:24:01,520
Speaker 3: is completely broken and you cannot repair it, then divorces

564
00:24:01,520 --> 00:24:03,159
Speaker 3: the way and the deed is done.

565
00:24:03,080 --> 00:24:05,840
Speaker 2: Let's finish it. He said that he would text her

566
00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:08,399
Speaker 2: that they can't meet up anymore as a final text,

567
00:24:08,440 --> 00:24:10,119
Speaker 2: but that he didn't want to delete her as a

568
00:24:10,119 --> 00:24:13,960
Speaker 2: friend on Instagram because it's more work related. That made

569
00:24:13,960 --> 00:24:16,400
Speaker 2: me feel still uncomfortable, So I told him he doesn't

570
00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:18,080
Speaker 2: need to be friends with her, as she is not

571
00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:20,639
Speaker 2: even a client. I want to trust him that it

572
00:24:20,720 --> 00:24:22,840
Speaker 2: was just a crush, and even if he can't quit

573
00:24:22,920 --> 00:24:26,520
Speaker 2: working at this specific gym, he can quit communicating outside

574
00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:29,240
Speaker 2: of it. We decided to think about marriage counseling, which

575
00:24:29,280 --> 00:24:31,600
Speaker 2: you should do. He thinks we can work on strengthening

576
00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:34,720
Speaker 2: our marriage spending more time together without outside help, and

577
00:24:34,800 --> 00:24:38,240
Speaker 2: I kind of agree. I don't know what marriage counseling

578
00:24:38,359 --> 00:24:40,520
Speaker 2: would tell us about the situation that can help us,

579
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:43,160
Speaker 2: but I'm not opposed to going. So that is where

580
00:24:43,160 --> 00:24:45,239
Speaker 2: we are now, and that it's the end.

581
00:24:45,480 --> 00:24:50,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it's just see where this goes between

582
00:24:50,160 --> 00:24:53,400
Speaker 3: you both. The fact that he didn't remove her, it's

583
00:24:53,440 --> 00:24:55,680
Speaker 3: just one person. You can remove one person from your life.

584
00:24:55,720 --> 00:24:58,639
Speaker 2: Yet I'm very eyebrows raised at that.

585
00:24:58,920 --> 00:25:02,359
Speaker 3: I would keep my eye on him, and like I said,

586
00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:04,160
Speaker 3: I want to see the messages that you send her

587
00:25:04,240 --> 00:25:07,000
Speaker 3: saying the final goodbye or what have you, saying, Hey,

588
00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:10,720
Speaker 3: my wife doesn't think our relationship is appropriate, which it's not.

589
00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:13,680
Speaker 3: I need to, you know, cut you off from my life.

590
00:25:13,720 --> 00:25:15,600
Speaker 3: I'm sorry that you cannot go to this gym. Here

591
00:25:15,600 --> 00:25:18,720
Speaker 3: are some recommendations at other gyms, something like that, so

592
00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:21,879
Speaker 3: you know there are more than just one gym out there.

593
00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:24,920
Speaker 2: It's true, there's more than just one. Yeah, I would, Yeah,

594
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:25,760
Speaker 2: that's what I would do.

595
00:25:25,840 --> 00:25:27,639
Speaker 3: The fact he's like, oh, she's not even a client,

596
00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:29,480
Speaker 3: but I want to be a member of this gym.

597
00:25:29,520 --> 00:25:30,639
Speaker 2: Doesn't make any sense.

598
00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:33,400
Speaker 3: The fact the fact that you're you're not even trying

599
00:25:33,440 --> 00:25:36,200
Speaker 3: to go one percent towards your wife and what she's

600
00:25:36,200 --> 00:25:39,800
Speaker 3: doing or what she's asking you not good. My husband

601
00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:42,760
Speaker 3: wants a white name for our baby because she's already

602
00:25:42,840 --> 00:25:43,840
Speaker 3: looking Middle Eastern.

603
00:25:44,040 --> 00:25:47,800
Speaker 2: Oh what do you what?

604
00:25:48,440 --> 00:25:50,639
Speaker 3: I'm Middle Eastern and my husband is white. When we

605
00:25:50,640 --> 00:25:52,560
Speaker 3: started dating, I told him that my culture was a

606
00:25:52,600 --> 00:25:54,320
Speaker 3: big deal for me, and I wasn't sure if we'd

607
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:56,359
Speaker 3: last since I was probably gonna be more interested in

608
00:25:56,400 --> 00:25:59,199
Speaker 3: someone who had the same ethnicity and values and all that.

609
00:25:59,440 --> 00:26:01,800
Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from user express f and

610
00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:03,800
Speaker 3: if you want to submit your own stories, submit them

611
00:26:03,800 --> 00:26:05,679
Speaker 3: to the r slash. Okay, story time suparate.

612
00:26:05,880 --> 00:26:08,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, so really quick, this marriage is going to be

613
00:26:08,480 --> 00:26:10,800
Speaker 2: over by the end of this story. I would guess

614
00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:13,600
Speaker 2: that's my prediction. I mean, they already have a baby,

615
00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:18,960
Speaker 2: so yeah, And apparently it's too middle Eastern and needs

616
00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:23,359
Speaker 2: to be more white, according to the husband, which is insane.

617
00:26:23,640 --> 00:26:25,600
Speaker 3: It's very crazy. I want to see what they want

618
00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:27,600
Speaker 3: to Okay, let's just get to it. Not only that,

619
00:26:27,720 --> 00:26:30,359
Speaker 3: my parents are strict Catholics, and he didn't even know

620
00:26:30,440 --> 00:26:33,160
Speaker 3: what religion was. He said he was maybe Christian or something,

621
00:26:33,240 --> 00:26:35,840
Speaker 3: but he wasn't sure. I'm may be a Christian or something,

622
00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:38,520
Speaker 3: but I'm not sure. He was pretty insistent that he tried.

623
00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:40,000
Speaker 3: He chased me for a while, and he took me

624
00:26:40,040 --> 00:26:42,600
Speaker 3: to a Middle Eastern restaurant for our first day. So corny,

625
00:26:42,720 --> 00:26:44,360
Speaker 3: but I love him. He was really open to learning

626
00:26:44,359 --> 00:26:46,760
Speaker 3: about my culture and everything. He was almost fascinated with

627
00:26:46,760 --> 00:26:48,680
Speaker 3: all of it. Basically, my life was my big fat

628
00:26:48,680 --> 00:26:51,000
Speaker 3: Greek wedding. I was partially embarrassed by everything and thought

629
00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:54,320
Speaker 3: he would scare him away, but he seemed to love it. Nice, cool,

630
00:26:54,440 --> 00:26:55,119
Speaker 3: We got married.

631
00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:59,040
Speaker 2: Keyword seemed right there. Keyword is seemed.

632
00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:02,160
Speaker 3: We got married and things were going well. I'm pregnant

633
00:27:02,160 --> 00:27:03,960
Speaker 3: now and we were talking about our baby. Some stuff

634
00:27:04,000 --> 00:27:05,560
Speaker 3: that he said just bothered me. And I want to

635
00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:07,280
Speaker 3: know if I'm crazy or was it weird. I have

636
00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:10,320
Speaker 3: pale skin and black hair with brown eyes, but green eyes.

637
00:27:10,359 --> 00:27:11,320
Speaker 3: Do you run in my family?

638
00:27:11,400 --> 00:27:11,760
Speaker 2: Hmmmm?

639
00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:14,719
Speaker 3: My husband has brown hair and green eyes. You had

640
00:27:14,720 --> 00:27:17,120
Speaker 3: bleach blonde hair and as a baby, like the blondest

641
00:27:17,119 --> 00:27:19,040
Speaker 3: baby ever, and in it darkened by the time he

642
00:27:19,080 --> 00:27:20,479
Speaker 3: was a kid. I know a lot of people with that.

643
00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:22,080
Speaker 3: It's kind of crazy. You know who you know someone

644
00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:22,399
Speaker 3: like that?

645
00:27:22,640 --> 00:27:24,920
Speaker 2: Yeah? Me, you had blonde hair. Oh yeah, my hair

646
00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:26,520
Speaker 2: was super blonde when I was a kid. Okay.

647
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:28,719
Speaker 3: We were talking about how our baby would look and

648
00:27:28,760 --> 00:27:30,919
Speaker 3: I was teasing him that she definitely look like me

649
00:27:31,080 --> 00:27:33,680
Speaker 3: because darker features are dominant, and he has brown hair too,

650
00:27:33,720 --> 00:27:35,480
Speaker 3: and then he brought up how he used to be blonde.

651
00:27:35,560 --> 00:27:37,159
Speaker 3: So I told him, how do you know, my hair

652
00:27:37,240 --> 00:27:39,240
Speaker 3: is pretty much black, so she's probably gonna have really

653
00:27:39,320 --> 00:27:41,280
Speaker 3: dark hair. I don't think she'll have a blonde phase,

654
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:43,879
Speaker 3: never know. He seemed kind of upset about that, because

655
00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:46,240
Speaker 3: he wanted his daughter to have cute blonde hair. But

656
00:27:46,280 --> 00:27:48,120
Speaker 3: I told him it was okay, and she'll have green

657
00:27:48,119 --> 00:27:50,399
Speaker 3: eyes like him, and he was like, no, I'm pretty

658
00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:52,320
Speaker 3: sure she's gonna come out looking like one of you guys.

659
00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:55,399
Speaker 3: I told him that, yeah, she's gonna look at least

660
00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:57,720
Speaker 3: a little Arab. I don't even know what he meant

661
00:27:57,760 --> 00:27:59,520
Speaker 3: by that. I didn't want to ruin the mood, so

662
00:27:59,560 --> 00:28:02,280
Speaker 3: I just cantinued to talk, and he seemed upset in

663
00:28:02,320 --> 00:28:04,200
Speaker 3: a way when he started talking about baby names, and

664
00:28:04,240 --> 00:28:06,399
Speaker 3: he had really cute name ideas. They were nice. But

665
00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:08,720
Speaker 3: I asked him what we thought about the names I liked,

666
00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:10,320
Speaker 3: and he just blurted out, can't we just give her

667
00:28:10,359 --> 00:28:14,480
Speaker 3: a white name? She's my baby too, What what is this?

668
00:28:14,760 --> 00:28:17,040
Speaker 3: I was not giving her ethnic names. I brought up

669
00:28:17,080 --> 00:28:20,120
Speaker 3: American names too. I really like Diana, for example, which

670
00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:22,400
Speaker 3: is Arabic, and I know my family would really like that.

671
00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:24,639
Speaker 3: And it's an English name too. I can't exactly go

672
00:28:24,680 --> 00:28:26,680
Speaker 3: to my parents and be like, yeah, our baby's name

673
00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:29,080
Speaker 3: is Jennifer, Yes, Jennifer's find name.

674
00:28:29,160 --> 00:28:30,960
Speaker 2: Our baby's name is Susan.

675
00:28:31,720 --> 00:28:33,639
Speaker 3: Not only that, I want her name to be related

676
00:28:33,640 --> 00:28:36,440
Speaker 3: to my culture. Diana doesn't sound ethnic, and it's obviously

677
00:28:36,480 --> 00:28:38,400
Speaker 3: not hard to pronounce her anything, and she wouldn't be

678
00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:43,280
Speaker 3: bullied at school like Keon a little boy I.

679
00:28:43,200 --> 00:28:47,760
Speaker 2: Related to this story. No, no, but why.

680
00:28:47,280 --> 00:28:49,640
Speaker 3: My teachers, I think I've only had I could count

681
00:28:49,720 --> 00:28:52,080
Speaker 3: on maybe two hands that the amount of teachers who

682
00:28:52,080 --> 00:28:54,440
Speaker 3: got my name right on the first day, kay, and

683
00:28:54,640 --> 00:28:57,480
Speaker 3: oh that was one of them. And it's a white name.

684
00:28:57,520 --> 00:28:59,120
Speaker 3: I thought it was the best of both worlds. I

685
00:28:59,120 --> 00:29:01,480
Speaker 3: would be so open to giving her whatever American middle

686
00:29:01,560 --> 00:29:03,800
Speaker 3: name he wants. But our baby is gonna be fifty

687
00:29:03,800 --> 00:29:06,160
Speaker 3: percent Middle Eastern and fifty percent white. I think she

688
00:29:06,200 --> 00:29:08,600
Speaker 3: should have a first name that's connected to both cultures.

689
00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:11,200
Speaker 2: It's just crazy to me that this is reading like

690
00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:16,160
Speaker 2: op is somehow just realizing that her husband is kind

691
00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:17,320
Speaker 2: of a bigot.

692
00:29:17,480 --> 00:29:20,360
Speaker 3: Andy. He's like, just she's gotta have blonde air.

693
00:29:21,320 --> 00:29:22,880
Speaker 2: Big dumb, bigot man, Do.

694
00:29:22,920 --> 00:29:24,280
Speaker 3: You not know how genetics work?

695
00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:26,600
Speaker 2: My guy? To be fair, a lot of people probably

696
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:29,720
Speaker 2: don't really know how genetics work at all. Dumb.

697
00:29:29,840 --> 00:29:32,360
Speaker 3: He got mad and said I wasn't taking him into consideration,

698
00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:34,080
Speaker 3: and he wants to choose the name. Since I made

699
00:29:34,120 --> 00:29:36,080
Speaker 3: her look Arab, and I got my part.

700
00:29:36,160 --> 00:29:41,960
Speaker 2: Since I made her look Arab, Bro, I made her

701
00:29:42,080 --> 00:29:42,920
Speaker 2: look Arab.

702
00:29:43,040 --> 00:29:46,240
Speaker 3: This should have been a discussion way before you all

703
00:29:46,240 --> 00:29:47,280
Speaker 3: started dating.

704
00:29:47,400 --> 00:29:51,760
Speaker 2: Yeah. Also, brother, it takes two to make a baby.

705
00:29:52,040 --> 00:29:55,640
Speaker 2: Y'all both made the baby look however it looks.

706
00:29:55,960 --> 00:30:00,120
Speaker 3: Hey, Also you're dating ope, you eat you?

707
00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:03,440
Speaker 2: You stupid, little little crustation of a man.

708
00:30:03,560 --> 00:30:04,760
Speaker 3: You little lawn shrimp.

709
00:30:04,920 --> 00:30:06,200
Speaker 2: You're a lawn shrimp.

710
00:30:06,320 --> 00:30:08,160
Speaker 3: I asked him to calm down, since we don't even

711
00:30:08,280 --> 00:30:10,320
Speaker 3: know how she looks, and for all we know, she

712
00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:12,560
Speaker 3: may have blonde hair and green eyes and looks nothing

713
00:30:12,680 --> 00:30:14,560
Speaker 3: like me, and one hundred percent will look like him.

714
00:30:14,600 --> 00:30:16,680
Speaker 3: He just got mad and continued on, and then he

715
00:30:16,760 --> 00:30:19,240
Speaker 3: was like, by the way, hummus is gross and went

716
00:30:19,280 --> 00:30:22,880
Speaker 3: to bed. Do this guy so dumb? This guy is so.

717
00:30:23,400 --> 00:30:25,480
Speaker 2: These are things where it's like, how do you not.

718
00:30:25,680 --> 00:30:27,480
Speaker 3: How do you want me to control hummis? Bro?

719
00:30:27,960 --> 00:30:30,680
Speaker 2: How do you not suss any of this out? Like

720
00:30:30,760 --> 00:30:33,760
Speaker 2: the first two weeks that you're together with this guy? Yeah,

721
00:30:33,800 --> 00:30:35,640
Speaker 2: and I guarantee you there's no way he did not

722
00:30:36,040 --> 00:30:38,200
Speaker 2: pull some of this behavior earlier in the relationship.

723
00:30:38,200 --> 00:30:40,480
Speaker 3: I gearte you, this guy loves hummus. Now I'm sitting

724
00:30:40,520 --> 00:30:43,120
Speaker 3: here in our living room wondering what to do. Lol,

725
00:30:43,200 --> 00:30:46,440
Speaker 3: we have relevant comments. Oh, I'm so excited for these comments. Fish,

726
00:30:46,480 --> 00:30:48,760
Speaker 3: you can't swim. I am Asian and my husband is white.

727
00:30:48,800 --> 00:30:50,600
Speaker 3: When we got together and decided to have children, we

728
00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:53,160
Speaker 3: went through similar motions with me wanting to give respect

729
00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:55,640
Speaker 3: to my culture and traditions, and him being born the

730
00:30:55,680 --> 00:30:58,840
Speaker 3: perfect aryan child, blonde hair, blue eyes, wanting more input.

731
00:30:58,880 --> 00:31:01,240
Speaker 3: What I learned was being part of certain ethnic groups.

732
00:31:01,280 --> 00:31:03,440
Speaker 3: We tend to take our culture seriously in thing. White

733
00:31:03,480 --> 00:31:06,000
Speaker 3: people have no culture, but they do. Him wanting a

734
00:31:06,000 --> 00:31:08,160
Speaker 3: white name and being petulant is his way of wanting

735
00:31:08,160 --> 00:31:09,440
Speaker 3: to be a part of this. He has made a

736
00:31:09,480 --> 00:31:11,360
Speaker 3: lot of effort in the past during your courtship and

737
00:31:11,400 --> 00:31:13,360
Speaker 3: trying to embrace your culture. He's probably feeling like you

738
00:31:13,400 --> 00:31:15,320
Speaker 3: are trying to say that your culture is far more

739
00:31:15,320 --> 00:31:17,400
Speaker 3: superior than his, since your child is gonna end up

740
00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:19,479
Speaker 3: with similar features to yours. I know it's not in

741
00:31:19,520 --> 00:31:21,840
Speaker 3: your intention to exclude him in any way, and you

742
00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:24,000
Speaker 3: are right to feel a bit puzzled by his behavior,

743
00:31:24,080 --> 00:31:25,800
Speaker 3: but I think you need to open the conversation with

744
00:31:25,880 --> 00:31:27,960
Speaker 3: him and try to see where he might be coming from.

745
00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:29,240
Speaker 3: He's the opposite of being right.

746
00:31:29,760 --> 00:31:34,000
Speaker 2: I don't know about the opposite of being racis. I

747
00:31:34,040 --> 00:31:36,440
Speaker 2: don't know that the reality is. I think he is

748
00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:40,080
Speaker 2: being a bit by being like, well, you guys already,

749
00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:42,480
Speaker 2: It's like by just implying like we need to give

750
00:31:42,480 --> 00:31:45,080
Speaker 2: her a white name because she's already gonna be not white.

751
00:31:45,560 --> 00:31:46,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's kind of right.

752
00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:48,560
Speaker 2: So it's like and it's like, that's your and you

753
00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:51,200
Speaker 2: guys get that. I guess where it's like, A, well,

754
00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:53,880
Speaker 2: it's she's already gonna have the worst way to look

755
00:31:54,120 --> 00:31:56,520
Speaker 2: or the worst way of being, so we'll give her

756
00:31:56,520 --> 00:31:59,000
Speaker 2: the better name. It's like that's the vibe. And it's

757
00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:00,240
Speaker 2: so weird to.

758
00:32:00,200 --> 00:32:01,280
Speaker 3: Say, do you know what I want to get it?

759
00:32:01,320 --> 00:32:03,400
Speaker 3: What's your last name? Is it like? Because guess what,

760
00:32:03,680 --> 00:32:05,600
Speaker 3: your daughter's probably get your last name? Brother.

761
00:32:05,840 --> 00:32:09,360
Speaker 2: My thing with whoever I would have ad with is

762
00:32:09,480 --> 00:32:12,360
Speaker 2: just like we have to determine whose last name is

763
00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:12,920
Speaker 2: just cool?

764
00:32:13,040 --> 00:32:16,520
Speaker 3: My name my full name. It goes from ethnic to white,

765
00:32:16,680 --> 00:32:18,440
Speaker 3: ethnic to white because I have two last names.

766
00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:18,720
Speaker 2: Yeah.

767
00:32:18,800 --> 00:32:22,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's it's like, oh my gosh, that's crazy. But

768
00:32:22,360 --> 00:32:24,000
Speaker 3: this is this is I'm relating to this story.

769
00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:26,200
Speaker 2: A lot of this is actually story.

770
00:32:26,360 --> 00:32:28,160
Speaker 3: This is my story. Guess what I want to name

771
00:32:28,240 --> 00:32:30,480
Speaker 3: my child something similar to like what I went through,

772
00:32:30,600 --> 00:32:33,040
Speaker 3: because it definitely definitely gave me personal You don't want

773
00:32:33,160 --> 00:32:36,600
Speaker 3: like a gym No, no, no, I don't want to blame, like.

774
00:32:36,600 --> 00:32:38,880
Speaker 2: You don't want to Ben? Do you want to Tammy?

775
00:32:39,160 --> 00:32:41,720
Speaker 3: No, no, op he says, thank you for your comment.

776
00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:43,560
Speaker 3: I know I got a ton of comments that he's

777
00:32:43,800 --> 00:32:46,360
Speaker 3: right and this and that. I don't think that's it.

778
00:32:46,440 --> 00:32:48,840
Speaker 3: He loves me and he loves my family and my culture.

779
00:32:49,080 --> 00:32:51,719
Speaker 2: Maybe he was just being so flippant and we were not.

780
00:32:51,960 --> 00:32:54,400
Speaker 2: Maybe it was being the way that that read. It

781
00:32:54,520 --> 00:32:56,520
Speaker 2: certainly read like he was being that way.

782
00:32:56,520 --> 00:32:58,680
Speaker 3: I think he's just really dumb. Maybe he's in the moment,

783
00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:01,040
Speaker 3: but it's very true, like you are getting it's a

784
00:33:01,040 --> 00:33:03,479
Speaker 3: conversation for both the parents, because guess what, it is

785
00:33:03,520 --> 00:33:05,640
Speaker 3: a conversation for both the parents. You can't just jump

786
00:33:05,680 --> 00:33:07,600
Speaker 3: the thing, jump the bridge here and be like yes,

787
00:33:07,640 --> 00:33:09,280
Speaker 3: as we're going with but like you're like, hey, I

788
00:33:09,280 --> 00:33:11,480
Speaker 3: want to brace my culture, but I want to I

789
00:33:11,480 --> 00:33:13,480
Speaker 3: want to brace your culture or what you want. Let's

790
00:33:13,520 --> 00:33:15,200
Speaker 3: have a mutual discussion about this.

791
00:33:15,360 --> 00:33:17,600
Speaker 2: It just felt so disrespectful the way it was written.

792
00:33:17,680 --> 00:33:19,720
Speaker 3: It was No, I think so. I think Diana is

793
00:33:19,720 --> 00:33:22,240
Speaker 3: a perfectly fine name because Opie was trying to get

794
00:33:22,280 --> 00:33:25,000
Speaker 3: a name that is, you know, uh, a middle I

795
00:33:25,000 --> 00:33:28,320
Speaker 3: guess Arab that Opie said that it comes from Arab descent,

796
00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:30,640
Speaker 3: but also it's an easy name to pronounce. It's a

797
00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:32,600
Speaker 3: beautiful name, wonder woman.

798
00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:33,479
Speaker 2: Nice.

799
00:33:33,600 --> 00:33:35,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, he loves me, and he loves my family and

800
00:33:35,560 --> 00:33:37,280
Speaker 3: my culture. I think he's just a bit concern with

801
00:33:37,320 --> 00:33:39,760
Speaker 3: our baby being one hundred percent Arab with her appearance

802
00:33:39,880 --> 00:33:41,960
Speaker 3: and name, and he wants to feel represented too, which

803
00:33:42,000 --> 00:33:42,600
Speaker 3: I understand.

804
00:33:42,600 --> 00:33:43,320
Speaker 2: And his last name.

805
00:33:43,320 --> 00:33:44,920
Speaker 3: That's the reason why I want a name that we

806
00:33:44,960 --> 00:33:47,960
Speaker 3: will both appreciate, some thing Arabic and American, simple and

807
00:33:48,040 --> 00:33:50,320
Speaker 3: easy to understand. He knows how important that is for me,

808
00:33:50,440 --> 00:33:52,520
Speaker 3: so I don't think he's trying to completely overlook what

809
00:33:52,560 --> 00:33:55,080
Speaker 3: I want. I think maybe he got annoyed since we

810
00:33:55,120 --> 00:33:57,080
Speaker 3: already were discussing how she might look like me and

811
00:33:57,080 --> 00:33:59,480
Speaker 3: not inherit any of his features. Some top comments again

812
00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:02,560
Speaker 3: Wandering zero seven. Your husband has issues aside. Diana is

813
00:34:02,560 --> 00:34:05,000
Speaker 3: a beautiful name at has been used in many cultures

814
00:34:05,000 --> 00:34:07,240
Speaker 3: and has many meanings. It's also a time as classic

815
00:34:07,280 --> 00:34:09,399
Speaker 3: that never dates itself, like some nineties names I can

816
00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:10,840
Speaker 3: think of. I wo'd be sure to point out to

817
00:34:10,880 --> 00:34:13,680
Speaker 3: your husband that Diana truly connects your cultures and has

818
00:34:13,719 --> 00:34:16,239
Speaker 3: great cultural some symbolism. It's a Diana, of course, but

819
00:34:16,320 --> 00:34:21,120
Speaker 3: also wonder woman. Look at that he did it LG

820
00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:25,080
Speaker 3: Platinum says better neighbor, hummus, yeah, it's time. The time

821
00:34:25,160 --> 00:34:28,440
Speaker 3: is now, so Sodipop says. The ultimatum for him, we

822
00:34:28,480 --> 00:34:31,640
Speaker 3: can name her Diana or ummise you get to me. Yeah, perfect,

823
00:34:31,719 --> 00:34:34,479
Speaker 3: it's the it's the meme of name, name your child,

824
00:34:34,560 --> 00:34:37,000
Speaker 3: what you love and you're like, man, I love you

825
00:34:37,120 --> 00:34:40,680
Speaker 3: Star Wars Lego, I love you, x Wing, I.

826
00:34:40,800 --> 00:34:42,960
Speaker 2: Love you PlayStation to update.

827
00:34:43,280 --> 00:34:45,719
Speaker 3: Not really sure if anyone is interested, but we talked

828
00:34:45,719 --> 00:34:47,400
Speaker 3: it out. He felt like the baby would look one

829
00:34:47,440 --> 00:34:49,640
Speaker 3: hundred percent like me and nothing like him, and he

830
00:34:49,719 --> 00:34:51,719
Speaker 3: was feeling left out. He said she wouldn't feel like

831
00:34:51,760 --> 00:34:54,239
Speaker 3: his baby if she looked completely like me and had

832
00:34:54,239 --> 00:34:56,520
Speaker 3: a name that I chose, and that he had no pardon,

833
00:34:56,600 --> 00:34:59,520
Speaker 3: that's it. He's not raped or disgusting or doesn't want

834
00:34:59,520 --> 00:35:02,040
Speaker 3: to airbase. So I reassured him that we have no

835
00:35:02,120 --> 00:35:04,880
Speaker 3: idea how she'd even look. Again, they're going to combine.

836
00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:07,680
Speaker 3: You're got to combine your features. It will happen.

837
00:35:07,719 --> 00:35:11,759
Speaker 2: You're going to mix your alleles together again. Genetics like,

838
00:35:12,120 --> 00:35:14,719
Speaker 2: I don't know, it's look and maybe look. I think

839
00:35:14,800 --> 00:35:17,600
Speaker 2: out of anyone involved here, like the one person who

840
00:35:17,640 --> 00:35:20,719
Speaker 2: would have the best, like bead On, like is the

841
00:35:20,840 --> 00:35:25,400
Speaker 2: husband is definitely Ope the wife. Yeah, so I guess

842
00:35:25,400 --> 00:35:28,359
Speaker 2: we have to believe her. But Op, you wrote that

843
00:35:28,400 --> 00:35:30,480
Speaker 2: like your husband was being very raged.

844
00:35:30,880 --> 00:35:32,920
Speaker 3: Okay, but I know what he means. He really had

845
00:35:32,960 --> 00:35:35,560
Speaker 3: to accommodate all these years, which I am so so

846
00:35:35,640 --> 00:35:36,239
Speaker 3: appreciative of.

847
00:35:36,320 --> 00:35:37,160
Speaker 2: He did not have to do that.

848
00:35:37,200 --> 00:35:39,000
Speaker 3: He could have taken the easy way out and dumped

849
00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:41,200
Speaker 3: me for someone that didn't require so much effort. But

850
00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:43,640
Speaker 3: he learned to love our foods and learned literally five

851
00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:46,280
Speaker 3: words of Arabic to show my family and impress them. Also,

852
00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:50,160
Speaker 3: he's not raked at all. He's really putting, really, really

853
00:35:50,800 --> 00:35:53,399
Speaker 3: that one home. Again. He's an amazing guy and I'm

854
00:35:53,440 --> 00:35:55,120
Speaker 3: so lucky to be with him. So we're going to

855
00:35:55,200 --> 00:35:58,000
Speaker 3: find out names together. If we both agree on an American name,

856
00:35:58,160 --> 00:36:00,160
Speaker 3: it's fine. She really is going to be surrounded by

857
00:36:00,200 --> 00:36:03,040
Speaker 3: her Arab heritage so much, with our big family and everything.

858
00:36:03,080 --> 00:36:05,160
Speaker 3: If a name helps him feel more connected to our baby,

859
00:36:05,160 --> 00:36:07,719
Speaker 3: it's all his. No, I don't give him it's again,

860
00:36:07,800 --> 00:36:10,680
Speaker 3: discuss it and you know it's all yours. What you

861
00:36:11,040 --> 00:36:14,759
Speaker 3: Tuning in to episodes with stories just like this on Spotify,

862
00:36:14,920 --> 00:36:17,840
Speaker 3: Apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts from and

863
00:36:17,880 --> 00:36:21,640
Speaker 3: just search. Okay, storytime, we have a plethora of Dakota

864
00:36:21,840 --> 00:36:24,040
Speaker 3: looking like that. Literally, that's that's what it is. You

865
00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:24,560
Speaker 3: just want that.

866
00:36:24,719 --> 00:36:25,200
Speaker 2: Look at that.

867
00:36:25,320 --> 00:36:26,520
Speaker 3: We have a lot more and there's a lot, a

868
00:36:26,560 --> 00:36:27,719
Speaker 3: little bit more left of the story.

869
00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:30,839
Speaker 2: But Dakota, I think it's warrants a discussion. I think

870
00:36:31,560 --> 00:36:34,680
Speaker 2: I don't know. Like my my biggest thing was like

871
00:36:34,760 --> 00:36:37,080
Speaker 2: it really feels like he just doesn't want his kid

872
00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:39,600
Speaker 2: to that he's upset his kid's gonna be Arabic. But

873
00:36:39,680 --> 00:36:42,759
Speaker 2: I guess it's not true. But also find a compromise.

874
00:36:43,040 --> 00:36:44,080
Speaker 2: Find a compromise, a.

875
00:36:44,040 --> 00:36:46,239
Speaker 3: Compromise, I think again, Diana was a beautiful name, and

876
00:36:46,280 --> 00:36:48,560
Speaker 3: you have your reasons, but maybe what name? What does

877
00:36:48,560 --> 00:36:50,920
Speaker 3: he want? Like go down a list and see like, okay,

878
00:36:50,960 --> 00:36:53,640
Speaker 3: he's like a cross. It's literally like your your March

879
00:36:53,640 --> 00:36:57,239
Speaker 3: Madness bracket. Okay, all right, we're gonna do Diana and

880
00:36:57,280 --> 00:37:01,040
Speaker 3: then Sally I want to name my kid and Kershaw

881
00:37:01,280 --> 00:37:04,800
Speaker 3: yeah exactly, like we were like, okay, Sally off the list,

882
00:37:04,920 --> 00:37:06,680
Speaker 3: you know, Megan off the list.

883
00:37:06,680 --> 00:37:09,399
Speaker 2: Wow, you guys, just go through Arabic names and then

884
00:37:09,480 --> 00:37:11,279
Speaker 2: he'll find some that he likes.

885
00:37:11,440 --> 00:37:12,239
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know.

886
00:37:12,320 --> 00:37:14,040
Speaker 2: I think he'll be like, I didn't know that was

887
00:37:14,080 --> 00:37:15,000
Speaker 2: an Arabic name.

888
00:37:15,120 --> 00:37:17,720
Speaker 3: Also, I really discussed with him why he doesn't like Hummus.

889
00:37:17,800 --> 00:37:20,000
Speaker 2: I mean, he's just kidding. I don't know that had

890
00:37:20,040 --> 00:37:24,320
Speaker 2: to I feel like maybe that's why it was Oh misinterpreted.

891
00:37:24,400 --> 00:37:24,680
Speaker 2: I got it.

892
00:37:24,719 --> 00:37:26,080
Speaker 3: I got it right here, right now. Oh yeah, let's

893
00:37:26,080 --> 00:37:28,640
Speaker 3: just get in the story. He apologized for dissing Hummus

894
00:37:28,680 --> 00:37:32,120
Speaker 3: and acting little childish, and I apologize for being controlling

895
00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:34,960
Speaker 3: and not taking his feelings or his own culture into account.

896
00:37:35,040 --> 00:37:37,520
Speaker 3: But we are fine. He all made up now and

897
00:37:37,560 --> 00:37:40,680
Speaker 3: I love him. Okay, relevant comments, fair enough, baconcy contender.

898
00:37:40,719 --> 00:37:43,479
Speaker 3: I love this ending. Super happy you guys resolve this. Yeah, op,

899
00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:45,600
Speaker 3: he says, thank you, so am. I I hate fighting

900
00:37:45,600 --> 00:37:47,759
Speaker 3: with my husband so much. It's the worst feeling in

901
00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:49,560
Speaker 3: the world. And I'm so glad we can move on

902
00:37:49,640 --> 00:37:51,880
Speaker 3: and just focus on finding a brand new name together.

903
00:37:52,120 --> 00:37:54,640
Speaker 3: Pineapple Battle says, man, I'm just glad he took back

904
00:37:54,640 --> 00:37:59,319
Speaker 3: what he said about Humus. Exqueeze Me says, what kind

905
00:37:59,360 --> 00:38:02,400
Speaker 3: of must and so Hummus even an anger out of

906
00:38:02,480 --> 00:38:04,080
Speaker 3: your personal problems.

907
00:38:05,120 --> 00:38:09,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was on that too by a champion mummus,

908
00:38:09,360 --> 00:38:11,120
Speaker 2: do has done nothing wrong.

909
00:38:11,239 --> 00:38:14,840
Speaker 3: Ever, I think I think out of this context, you

910
00:38:14,920 --> 00:38:16,760
Speaker 3: need to name your daughter, hummus.

911
00:38:16,320 --> 00:38:21,160
Speaker 2: It's time to name your daughters at least Sabra. Yeah,

912
00:38:21,160 --> 00:38:23,640
Speaker 2: but that is the end of that story. Hey is

913
00:38:23,680 --> 00:38:24,520
Speaker 2: John og Host.

914
00:38:24,520 --> 00:38:26,040
Speaker 4: We're gonna get back to the stories, but a quick

915
00:38:26,080 --> 00:38:27,879
Speaker 4: free minute break of ads from our sponsors.

916
00:38:28,200 --> 00:38:31,640
Speaker 1: My mother in law stole my son's ashes, but her

917
00:38:31,680 --> 00:38:34,880
Speaker 1: apology gift was an even worse insult.

918
00:38:35,800 --> 00:38:39,280
Speaker 2: You don't say trigger warning child.

919
00:38:39,840 --> 00:38:43,160
Speaker 1: My son passed away just over a year ago, when

920
00:38:43,200 --> 00:38:45,880
Speaker 1: he was seven, and it's been pretty hard on everyone

921
00:38:45,920 --> 00:38:49,600
Speaker 1: in the family obviously. Yes, mother in law was pretty

922
00:38:49,640 --> 00:38:52,160
Speaker 1: close with him. She baby sat him for me while

923
00:38:52,200 --> 00:38:55,239
Speaker 1: I worked until he passed away. By the way, this

924
00:38:55,320 --> 00:38:57,239
Speaker 1: comes from Mary Floor And if you want to sit

925
00:38:57,239 --> 00:38:59,440
Speaker 1: in your own stories, go to our slash Okay storytime,

926
00:38:59,520 --> 00:39:02,320
Speaker 1: soebread it. But I hope you don't have stories like

927
00:39:02,360 --> 00:39:03,960
Speaker 1: this to submit because this one sad.

928
00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:04,960
Speaker 2: Yes it is.

929
00:39:05,000 --> 00:39:08,000
Speaker 1: I felt more comfortable leaving him with her as she

930
00:39:08,040 --> 00:39:10,680
Speaker 1: was a nurse. He was born at twenty four weeks

931
00:39:11,080 --> 00:39:15,319
Speaker 1: and had cerebral palsy and was generally medically fragile mother

932
00:39:15,360 --> 00:39:17,520
Speaker 1: in law and I aren't too close. At first, she

933
00:39:17,520 --> 00:39:19,360
Speaker 1: didn't like me, but seemed to warm up once a

934
00:39:19,400 --> 00:39:22,080
Speaker 1: significant other and I had kids. She still babysits for

935
00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:25,280
Speaker 1: us when needed, which is less often these days. Oh.

936
00:39:25,760 --> 00:39:30,040
Speaker 1: We had our son cremated. Oh. When he was cremated,

937
00:39:30,320 --> 00:39:32,440
Speaker 1: my mother in law suggested that we get a few

938
00:39:32,560 --> 00:39:36,160
Speaker 1: smaller urns and split up the ashes so we can

939
00:39:36,280 --> 00:39:41,640
Speaker 1: all have urns. Us are in laws and my parents. Obviously,

940
00:39:41,760 --> 00:39:43,880
Speaker 1: that did not go down well with me, and I

941
00:39:43,920 --> 00:39:46,560
Speaker 1: said no, because you don't want to separate your child

942
00:39:46,600 --> 00:39:48,200
Speaker 1: into different urns.

943
00:39:48,239 --> 00:39:48,719
Speaker 2: Correct.

944
00:39:49,120 --> 00:39:52,400
Speaker 1: She's laugh to admit it was a bad idea and

945
00:39:52,440 --> 00:39:55,080
Speaker 1: didn't mention it again. For Mother's Day this year, we

946
00:39:55,160 --> 00:39:56,840
Speaker 1: planned on getting mother in law and my mom and

947
00:39:56,920 --> 00:39:59,920
Speaker 1: necklace with some of his ashes in it, which she

948
00:40:00,000 --> 00:40:01,960
Speaker 1: I knew about as she'd been asking for one.

949
00:40:02,480 --> 00:40:03,160
Speaker 2: We were up for it.

950
00:40:03,480 --> 00:40:05,640
Speaker 1: I fancied one myself, so it was going to get

951
00:40:05,680 --> 00:40:08,000
Speaker 1: us all one, but with the VID and everything, we

952
00:40:08,120 --> 00:40:11,560
Speaker 1: never got around doing it, which she seemed pretty irritated

953
00:40:11,600 --> 00:40:14,760
Speaker 1: by at the time. Never mentioned it again and thanked

954
00:40:14,840 --> 00:40:16,880
Speaker 1: us for the other gift we sent her a few

955
00:40:16,960 --> 00:40:21,720
Speaker 1: days ago. She babysat my daughter at my house today,

956
00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:24,800
Speaker 1: I was cleaning, and while I was cleaning the shelf

957
00:40:24,880 --> 00:40:27,720
Speaker 1: that we have for our son for some of his things, pictures,

958
00:40:27,760 --> 00:40:34,000
Speaker 1: trophies from baseball tournaments, et cetera, I noticed his urn

959
00:40:34,680 --> 00:40:39,840
Speaker 1: was gone. Excuse me, Naturally, I freaked out. Asked my

960
00:40:39,920 --> 00:40:42,240
Speaker 1: daughter if she'd moved it, even though she can't reach

961
00:40:42,800 --> 00:40:46,080
Speaker 1: it has never been moved in the time it's been there.

962
00:40:46,200 --> 00:40:50,879
Speaker 1: This is the urn of her son's ashes. Yes, mother

963
00:40:50,920 --> 00:40:53,680
Speaker 1: in law. Oh boy, this is the only other person

964
00:40:53,680 --> 00:40:56,759
Speaker 1: that has been in the house. So I called her.

965
00:40:56,960 --> 00:41:00,040
Speaker 1: She owned up to it right away and explained she

966
00:40:59,880 --> 00:41:03,120
Speaker 1: took them so she can spend some time with him

967
00:41:04,760 --> 00:41:07,720
Speaker 1: and get the ashes sent off for her gift. Because

968
00:41:07,719 --> 00:41:10,920
Speaker 1: she was disheartened that I didn't get it sorted in

969
00:41:11,080 --> 00:41:15,000
Speaker 1: time for mother and Mother's Day. She hid the urn

970
00:41:15,040 --> 00:41:19,240
Speaker 1: in her bag so I wouldn't notice, and took it home.

971
00:41:19,600 --> 00:41:22,080
Speaker 1: That's awful. I told her she was completely out of

972
00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:24,680
Speaker 1: order and demanded she bring the ashes back, as I

973
00:41:24,680 --> 00:41:29,240
Speaker 1: did not give her permission to steal his ashes. Yeah,

974
00:41:29,600 --> 00:41:31,839
Speaker 1: steal his ashes from his house and his family. But

975
00:41:31,920 --> 00:41:37,120
Speaker 1: she said, as his grandma Grandmama writes, she has every

976
00:41:37,280 --> 00:41:41,040
Speaker 1: right to have him for a while. F that even

977
00:41:41,080 --> 00:41:43,560
Speaker 1: if she'd asked, I probably would have said no. But

978
00:41:43,719 --> 00:41:47,040
Speaker 1: I'm in complete shock that she would just take him

979
00:41:47,280 --> 00:41:49,400
Speaker 1: like that. She says she will bring his urn back

980
00:41:49,440 --> 00:41:51,560
Speaker 1: tomorrow and told me not to be angry about it,

981
00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:54,879
Speaker 1: because what's done is done. But every time I think

982
00:41:54,920 --> 00:41:58,680
Speaker 1: about it, I get so angry. I'm not being completely

983
00:41:58,719 --> 00:42:02,000
Speaker 1: over the top to think that's left up, am I.

984
00:42:02,000 --> 00:42:04,760
Speaker 1: I'm so worried now that she won't even bring him back.

985
00:42:05,280 --> 00:42:09,040
Speaker 1: And there is an update just adding that we did

986
00:42:09,080 --> 00:42:12,120
Speaker 1: get his ashes back. Okay, that's a win. I have

987
00:42:12,280 --> 00:42:15,160
Speaker 1: commented with more details, but it's buried in the comments somewhere.

988
00:42:15,400 --> 00:42:18,279
Speaker 1: We planned to file a police report, okay, it's true,

989
00:42:18,320 --> 00:42:22,160
Speaker 1: get him involved, which will sort tonight as we can

990
00:42:22,160 --> 00:42:25,839
Speaker 1: submit it online. We likely won't press charges, but I

991
00:42:26,120 --> 00:42:30,120
Speaker 1: want to start a paper trail just in case and

992
00:42:30,160 --> 00:42:32,440
Speaker 1: for peace of mind. Exactly all right, we got the

993
00:42:32,480 --> 00:42:34,879
Speaker 1: full we got the big update. We've been fortunate enough

994
00:42:35,160 --> 00:42:37,240
Speaker 1: that mother in law seems to have gotten the message

995
00:42:37,239 --> 00:42:40,200
Speaker 1: and has not contacted us since significant other went to

996
00:42:40,200 --> 00:42:42,839
Speaker 1: our place to get the ashes back. My significant other

997
00:42:43,080 --> 00:42:46,000
Speaker 1: spoke with his dad father in law, who said that.

998
00:42:46,040 --> 00:42:48,920
Speaker 1: She claimed she's giving us the space we need and

999
00:42:49,000 --> 00:42:51,560
Speaker 1: seems to think we'll get over it eventually. But I

1000
00:42:51,640 --> 00:42:55,479
Speaker 1: think I'm even more angry at her now. I've had

1001
00:42:55,520 --> 00:42:58,239
Speaker 1: the time to be less upset by it. Now I'm

1002
00:42:58,360 --> 00:43:02,160
Speaker 1: just pissed. This morning, we had a delivery addressed to me.

1003
00:43:03,040 --> 00:43:05,240
Speaker 1: Didn't know what it could be. I had not ordered

1004
00:43:05,239 --> 00:43:09,080
Speaker 1: anything at all recently, but figured I ordered something in

1005
00:43:09,160 --> 00:43:11,480
Speaker 1: my sleep deprived state at three am, so it was

1006
00:43:11,880 --> 00:43:15,080
Speaker 1: a sleepwalk and purchase wouldn't be the first time. But now.

1007
00:43:15,120 --> 00:43:20,240
Speaker 1: It was a box with a little black fabric bag,

1008
00:43:20,840 --> 00:43:25,920
Speaker 1: and inside was a locket that has ashes in it.

1009
00:43:26,200 --> 00:43:26,960
Speaker 2: Ahhh.

1010
00:43:27,719 --> 00:43:31,279
Speaker 1: Connecting the dots, it was pretty clear straight away I

1011
00:43:31,320 --> 00:43:34,200
Speaker 1: love that button, who the ashes belonged to, and who

1012
00:43:34,280 --> 00:43:37,760
Speaker 1: the locket came from. I don't know what she was thinking.

1013
00:43:38,040 --> 00:43:41,000
Speaker 1: I knew it was likely she'd taken some my God,

1014
00:43:41,719 --> 00:43:45,600
Speaker 1: but sending me this just feels like a complete slap

1015
00:43:45,640 --> 00:43:51,680
Speaker 1: in the face. It's probably her poor attempt to apologize,

1016
00:43:51,719 --> 00:43:54,040
Speaker 1: but it feels so wrong and weird. Getting a part

1017
00:43:54,080 --> 00:43:57,359
Speaker 1: of my son as a gift from my mother in law,

1018
00:43:58,000 --> 00:44:00,640
Speaker 1: who took him the way she did. She knew what

1019
00:44:00,680 --> 00:44:03,600
Speaker 1: type of jewelry I was looking at, and this is

1020
00:44:03,640 --> 00:44:05,879
Speaker 1: the opposite of it. It's big and bulky and has

1021
00:44:05,920 --> 00:44:10,040
Speaker 1: the words together forever in what looks like comic sands.

1022
00:44:10,600 --> 00:44:15,720
Speaker 2: No, all comic sand.

1023
00:44:15,719 --> 00:44:19,640
Speaker 1: It's not my style at all, and it looks cheap.

1024
00:44:20,640 --> 00:44:23,240
Speaker 1: I know exactly what type of necklace she wanted made,

1025
00:44:23,239 --> 00:44:25,480
Speaker 1: and I just know she'll be getting the one she

1026
00:44:25,560 --> 00:44:28,080
Speaker 1: wants made, and this is probably some kind of attempt

1027
00:44:28,400 --> 00:44:32,040
Speaker 1: to justify it. I don't mean to be ungrateful, but

1028
00:44:32,200 --> 00:44:35,480
Speaker 1: considering how she got the ashes, I just can't be

1029
00:44:35,560 --> 00:44:38,520
Speaker 1: grateful for that. The significant other thinks we should just

1030
00:44:38,600 --> 00:44:41,759
Speaker 1: ignore it and do nothing, put the ashes back with

1031
00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:45,080
Speaker 1: the rest, and toss the locket. I wanted to put

1032
00:44:45,120 --> 00:44:47,640
Speaker 1: the ashes back and then put the dark locket in

1033
00:44:47,680 --> 00:44:50,960
Speaker 1: her mailbox. Personally, we won't have to see her, but

1034
00:44:51,040 --> 00:44:54,640
Speaker 1: we be sending the message. It just makes me angry

1035
00:44:54,680 --> 00:44:58,000
Speaker 1: that she's treating him and his ashes like some kind

1036
00:44:58,000 --> 00:45:01,040
Speaker 1: of bargaining chip in what I assume is an attempt

1037
00:45:01,200 --> 00:45:03,279
Speaker 1: to make up for what she did. I try to

1038
00:45:03,280 --> 00:45:04,840
Speaker 1: post the picture of the locket, but it has to

1039
00:45:04,840 --> 00:45:06,719
Speaker 1: be approved by the mod, so I'll skip that for now.

1040
00:45:06,800 --> 00:45:09,040
Speaker 1: There's another update. There's another freaking.

1041
00:45:09,200 --> 00:45:11,799
Speaker 2: This is definitely not just ignored and hope it goes

1042
00:45:11,840 --> 00:45:17,760
Speaker 2: away type of issue. This is a I will probably

1043
00:45:17,800 --> 00:45:20,800
Speaker 2: never look at or feel the same way about you again.

1044
00:45:21,040 --> 00:45:22,760
Speaker 1: I mean you need you need to put up boundaries.

1045
00:45:22,800 --> 00:45:25,200
Speaker 1: This is this is a moment where you're like, all, right,

1046
00:45:25,280 --> 00:45:30,360
Speaker 1: boundaries need to be established and made clear, and distance

1047
00:45:30,440 --> 00:45:32,880
Speaker 1: also needs to be created, like these are this is.

1048
00:45:32,920 --> 00:45:35,240
Speaker 1: This is a person that's invading all of your personal space.

1049
00:45:35,320 --> 00:45:37,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would get the I mean, the police are

1050
00:45:37,560 --> 00:45:41,200
Speaker 3: already involved, but like, what can we do because like,

1051
00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:43,040
Speaker 3: this is not okay with me? I would put the

1052
00:45:43,160 --> 00:45:45,799
Speaker 3: urn in is if this was if this was my

1053
00:45:46,080 --> 00:45:50,680
Speaker 3: child and my mother in law took this without my

1054
00:45:50,840 --> 00:45:55,080
Speaker 3: consent and did all of this crap, I'm pressing charges

1055
00:45:55,160 --> 00:45:55,640
Speaker 3: or something.

1056
00:45:55,840 --> 00:45:58,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, this is I don't think you're ever You're

1057
00:45:58,600 --> 00:46:00,960
Speaker 2: not coming back. That probably not well welcome again. And

1058
00:46:01,160 --> 00:46:04,360
Speaker 2: not only did you do that, but the lockett was tacky.

1059
00:46:04,600 --> 00:46:08,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, if the lockett wasn't tacky, maybe maybe the lockett.

1060
00:46:08,440 --> 00:46:12,520
Speaker 2: Was just a little classy, I'd feel different about it.

1061
00:46:12,560 --> 00:46:18,520
Speaker 2: But it's a clunky, junkie comic sands lockett up daily.

1062
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:21,759
Speaker 1: So a part of me is stoked that she has

1063
00:46:21,840 --> 00:46:25,240
Speaker 1: realized that we don't want anything to do with her anymore.

1064
00:46:26,120 --> 00:46:29,160
Speaker 1: But I'm bummed that she promised my kids something that

1065
00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:33,640
Speaker 1: she's now thrown away. I posted about just no mother

1066
00:46:33,640 --> 00:46:37,920
Speaker 1: in law. Okay, since then, we've been on rocky terms.

1067
00:46:38,480 --> 00:46:44,160
Speaker 1: She has facetimed DD twice since, which is all I've

1068
00:46:44,200 --> 00:46:46,480
Speaker 1: been allowing. We have arranged another sitter for when we

1069
00:46:46,520 --> 00:46:49,120
Speaker 1: need one, and she's not allowed in my home anymore.

1070
00:46:49,320 --> 00:46:52,560
Speaker 1: On their first FaceTime, dear daughter told just No mother

1071
00:46:52,600 --> 00:46:55,840
Speaker 1: in law that she'd asked Santa for a specific stuffed

1072
00:46:55,840 --> 00:46:59,400
Speaker 1: animal she'd seen in Target. We'd struggle to find this

1073
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:02,920
Speaker 1: specific animal after she'd seen it one time, so I

1074
00:47:02,960 --> 00:47:04,680
Speaker 1: was bummed that we wouldn't be able to get it

1075
00:47:04,719 --> 00:47:08,120
Speaker 1: for her. We found a few alternatives instead, and just

1076
00:47:08,160 --> 00:47:09,839
Speaker 1: now mother in law text me a picture the next

1077
00:47:09,920 --> 00:47:12,960
Speaker 1: day asking if the animal she'd just found in Target

1078
00:47:13,400 --> 00:47:18,640
Speaker 1: was the one dear daughter wanted. I said yes, I

1079
00:47:18,680 --> 00:47:21,440
Speaker 1: don't know how she'd managed to find one, and despite

1080
00:47:21,520 --> 00:47:24,439
Speaker 1: wanting no contact, I asked if she could buy one

1081
00:47:24,440 --> 00:47:29,160
Speaker 1: for me and I'd pay her back instead. She insisted

1082
00:47:29,880 --> 00:47:33,560
Speaker 1: that she'd buy it for her for Christmas. I was like, okay,

1083
00:47:33,600 --> 00:47:37,400
Speaker 1: sure for my kid's sake, and she'd already reluctantly agreed

1084
00:47:37,440 --> 00:47:40,239
Speaker 1: that any present she gave would be left on our

1085
00:47:40,320 --> 00:47:43,000
Speaker 1: doors step and she wouldn't be allowed in the house

1086
00:47:43,040 --> 00:47:46,160
Speaker 1: at all during the holidays. On the next FaceTime, just no,

1087
00:47:46,239 --> 00:47:49,120
Speaker 1: mother in law actually hints to dear daughter that she'd

1088
00:47:49,160 --> 00:47:54,160
Speaker 1: bought her the animal. Dear daughter or darling daughter catches on,

1089
00:47:54,680 --> 00:47:57,040
Speaker 1: and all she starts to talk about to me is

1090
00:47:57,040 --> 00:47:59,520
Speaker 1: the fact that she's going to get the toy. I

1091
00:47:59,600 --> 00:48:03,480
Speaker 1: was a bit bitter about it, honestly. But anyway, fast

1092
00:48:03,480 --> 00:48:06,440
Speaker 1: forward a few days and she starts messaging my husband

1093
00:48:06,560 --> 00:48:11,480
Speaker 1: asking if she can come over on Christmas Eve, like usual,

1094
00:48:12,640 --> 00:48:16,000
Speaker 1: the audacity, after all you've done to be like, yeah, like,

1095
00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:18,480
Speaker 1: can we just forget about the fact that I stole

1096
00:48:18,560 --> 00:48:22,120
Speaker 1: your son's ashes and put it in a tacky comic

1097
00:48:22,239 --> 00:48:25,600
Speaker 1: sands junk clocket. Let's get just just forget about that.

1098
00:48:25,640 --> 00:48:27,280
Speaker 2: I have a feeling I know what's gonna happen.

1099
00:48:28,360 --> 00:48:30,880
Speaker 1: She's goulda put the ashes in the bear. Of course,

1100
00:48:31,520 --> 00:48:34,600
Speaker 1: we continue to refuse. No, we're not gonna let your

1101
00:48:34,960 --> 00:48:38,720
Speaker 1: you earn stealing mother in law come into our house.

1102
00:48:39,000 --> 00:48:39,439
Speaker 2: That's right.

1103
00:48:39,560 --> 00:48:43,320
Speaker 1: Bad terms aside the's pandemic, and we're not inviting anyone

1104
00:48:43,400 --> 00:48:45,920
Speaker 1: into our home, even those that we are are on

1105
00:48:45,960 --> 00:48:48,480
Speaker 1: good terms with. In response, she said she wasn't going

1106
00:48:48,520 --> 00:48:50,759
Speaker 1: to give to your daughter the toy at all if

1107
00:48:50,800 --> 00:48:53,680
Speaker 1: she couldn't give it to her in person, So she

1108
00:48:53,800 --> 00:48:57,560
Speaker 1: tried to blackmail us, which we didn't give into. So

1109
00:48:57,600 --> 00:49:04,239
Speaker 1: she threw out the toy I told us she had

1110
00:49:04,480 --> 00:49:08,879
Speaker 1: and blamed us for ruining dear daughter's Christmas. I'm furious.

1111
00:49:09,200 --> 00:49:12,200
Speaker 1: Not only did she tell dear daughter that she got

1112
00:49:12,239 --> 00:49:15,720
Speaker 1: it for her, she then let her stupid vendetta against

1113
00:49:15,840 --> 00:49:19,480
Speaker 1: us ruin it for dear daughter. She's a witch and

1114
00:49:19,520 --> 00:49:22,000
Speaker 1: I hate her, and I don't know what to tell

1115
00:49:22,160 --> 00:49:24,840
Speaker 1: my poor baby girl when she doesn't even have a

1116
00:49:24,880 --> 00:49:29,240
Speaker 1: present at all from her grandma on Christmas Day. But luckily,

1117
00:49:29,280 --> 00:49:33,000
Speaker 1: we have a present for you every day if you

1118
00:49:33,080 --> 00:49:35,440
Speaker 1: just go to our podcast, Okay, Storytime wherever you get

1119
00:49:35,440 --> 00:49:39,480
Speaker 1: your podcasts, we have forty seven straight days, forty eight

1120
00:49:39,760 --> 00:49:43,120
Speaker 1: straight twenty four hour days that you could listen to

1121
00:49:43,160 --> 00:49:47,320
Speaker 1: this podcast, So get listening. My husband ran to multiple

1122
00:49:47,320 --> 00:49:51,120
Speaker 1: targets again today and they still don't have one. He

1123
00:49:51,200 --> 00:49:54,640
Speaker 1: asked the staff and they said there's none. I've asked

1124
00:49:54,719 --> 00:49:57,560
Speaker 1: on my local Facebook and a few people have said

1125
00:49:57,560 --> 00:50:00,160
Speaker 1: they'll keep a lookout. I'm just hoping that some one

1126
00:50:00,760 --> 00:50:03,279
Speaker 1: has one at home they don't want so I can

1127
00:50:03,320 --> 00:50:07,879
Speaker 1: get her one before Christmas. Edits Thank you so much

1128
00:50:08,120 --> 00:50:10,719
Speaker 1: to those offering to look I have a promising lead

1129
00:50:10,760 --> 00:50:13,040
Speaker 1: on Facebook, but if it falls through, I will reach out.

1130
00:50:13,400 --> 00:50:15,960
Speaker 1: You are all awesome and I'm tearing up reading all

1131
00:50:16,040 --> 00:50:16,920
Speaker 1: your offers.

1132
00:50:17,120 --> 00:50:17,279
Speaker 2: Edit.

1133
00:50:17,680 --> 00:50:22,080
Speaker 1: The Facebook lead worked out, let's go. You got a

1134
00:50:22,080 --> 00:50:24,960
Speaker 1: present for your dear daughter. Thanks again for the offers,

1135
00:50:24,960 --> 00:50:27,440
Speaker 1: but thankfully she'll have one for Christmas. Making sure she

1136
00:50:27,560 --> 00:50:32,320
Speaker 1: knows it from us though, and not earn stealing grandma

1137
00:50:33,800 --> 00:50:34,600
Speaker 1: big facts.

1138
00:50:34,680 --> 00:50:39,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, Grandma's out. Grandma's Grandma's out. That is three strikes out.

1139
00:50:39,480 --> 00:50:40,839
Speaker 2: You're done.

1140
00:50:41,200 --> 00:50:44,839
Speaker 1: My mother in law insulted me and refuses to apologize.

1141
00:50:45,320 --> 00:50:46,960
Speaker 1: I don't want her at the wedding.

1142
00:50:47,200 --> 00:50:50,680
Speaker 2: You don't want the insulting woman who won't apologize at

1143
00:50:50,680 --> 00:50:51,200
Speaker 2: your wedding.

1144
00:50:51,800 --> 00:50:57,040
Speaker 1: Background Hi twenty one Email was recently on vacation with

1145
00:50:57,200 --> 00:51:01,120
Speaker 1: my fiance, twenty three Mail and his family. He has

1146
00:51:01,160 --> 00:51:05,880
Speaker 1: a daughter, three female, from a previous relationship, so everyone

1147
00:51:05,920 --> 00:51:08,439
Speaker 1: aside from the daughter is an adults. We were all

1148
00:51:08,480 --> 00:51:11,000
Speaker 1: in one vacation house, including my daughter, and there were

1149
00:51:11,040 --> 00:51:13,480
Speaker 1: ten people there. By the way, this comes from Icy

1150
00:51:13,560 --> 00:51:14,799
Speaker 1: Gummy Bear and if you want to sit up your

1151
00:51:14,800 --> 00:51:17,760
Speaker 1: own stories, go to our slash okay storytime subred So.

1152
00:51:17,800 --> 00:51:22,120
Speaker 1: The daughter absolutely adores her grandmother, my future mother in

1153
00:51:22,200 --> 00:51:24,920
Speaker 1: law and grandfather my future.

1154
00:51:24,640 --> 00:51:25,319
Speaker 2: Father in law.

1155
00:51:25,760 --> 00:51:29,640
Speaker 1: As much as I would love to be his daughter's mother,

1156
00:51:29,960 --> 00:51:34,120
Speaker 1: it's been made pretty clear to me by his family

1157
00:51:34,360 --> 00:51:38,440
Speaker 1: that I will never be seen as her mother in

1158
00:51:38,520 --> 00:51:42,520
Speaker 1: their eyes, despite how much I try. I don't think

1159
00:51:42,560 --> 00:51:45,200
Speaker 1: you can try. The actual mother is very touch and

1160
00:51:45,239 --> 00:51:48,040
Speaker 1: go and doesn't see her daughter much despite the custody agreement,

1161
00:51:48,280 --> 00:51:51,560
Speaker 1: and constantly cancels. There's a chance that because of a

1162
00:51:51,600 --> 00:51:54,520
Speaker 1: genetic condition I am likely to have, that I may

1163
00:51:54,680 --> 00:51:57,200
Speaker 1: not be able to have children. This is something I

1164
00:51:57,200 --> 00:51:59,719
Speaker 1: have talked freely about for a few months now, and

1165
00:51:59,840 --> 00:52:04,120
Speaker 1: his family is aware now On to what happened. It

1166
00:52:04,160 --> 00:52:07,440
Speaker 1: was late evening on the final full day of vacation.

1167
00:52:08,280 --> 00:52:10,759
Speaker 1: We were all supposed to leave late morning slash early

1168
00:52:10,800 --> 00:52:14,200
Speaker 1: afternoon the following day. My future mother in law went

1169
00:52:14,239 --> 00:52:17,240
Speaker 1: to her room to get ready for bed and start packing.

1170
00:52:17,600 --> 00:52:21,000
Speaker 1: My fiance's daughter ran after her and then decided to

1171
00:52:21,000 --> 00:52:24,799
Speaker 1: go into the room my fiance's brothers and one of

1172
00:52:24,800 --> 00:52:27,799
Speaker 1: their girlfriend's share. She opened the door and ran in.

1173
00:52:27,920 --> 00:52:30,279
Speaker 1: I followed her because she wasn't supposed to go in there,

1174
00:52:30,680 --> 00:52:34,439
Speaker 1: as his family made clear. I tried to coax her out,

1175
00:52:34,840 --> 00:52:39,480
Speaker 1: but she wanted to be with my fiance's brother's girlfriend. She, however,

1176
00:52:39,600 --> 00:52:42,080
Speaker 1: was getting ready for some pictures and to have avoid

1177
00:52:42,160 --> 00:52:44,960
Speaker 1: his family fussing at her or me for letting her stay.

1178
00:52:45,320 --> 00:52:50,760
Speaker 1: I picked her up. She immediately screamed and threw herself back,

1179
00:52:51,280 --> 00:52:53,720
Speaker 1: trying to get out of my arms. I did everything

1180
00:52:53,760 --> 00:52:57,240
Speaker 1: I could to try and keep her from hitting anything

1181
00:52:57,280 --> 00:53:00,239
Speaker 1: as she did, but she headbutted the wall.

1182
00:53:00,920 --> 00:53:01,040
Speaker 2: Oo.

1183
00:53:01,640 --> 00:53:03,959
Speaker 1: I immediately put my hand where she just got hurt

1184
00:53:04,200 --> 00:53:07,120
Speaker 1: and started comforting her as I carried her out of

1185
00:53:07,160 --> 00:53:12,440
Speaker 1: the room. My fiance's brother's girlfriend saw all of this happening,

1186
00:53:12,520 --> 00:53:19,319
Speaker 1: and she insisted that I did nothing wrong. As I

1187
00:53:19,440 --> 00:53:23,760
Speaker 1: left the room, my future mother in law stormed out

1188
00:53:23,800 --> 00:53:27,520
Speaker 1: of hers and looked very angry. I told her that

1189
00:53:27,560 --> 00:53:30,160
Speaker 1: the little girl got upset when I picked her up

1190
00:53:30,200 --> 00:53:32,439
Speaker 1: and she hit her head while trying to get down.

1191
00:53:33,160 --> 00:53:37,200
Speaker 1: She snatched the little girl out of my arms and said,

1192
00:53:38,320 --> 00:53:44,000
Speaker 1: just don't have kids, Just don't. Then she went back

1193
00:53:44,040 --> 00:53:47,319
Speaker 1: into a room with the little girl and slammed the door.

1194
00:53:47,440 --> 00:53:50,640
Speaker 1: Felt like the old one, two to the guts. I

1195
00:53:50,680 --> 00:53:53,839
Speaker 1: stood there in shock for a second and twenty felt

1196
00:53:53,840 --> 00:53:56,920
Speaker 1: the tears welling up in my eyes. I ran to

1197
00:53:57,000 --> 00:53:59,720
Speaker 1: the room that my fiance and I shared and locked

1198
00:53:59,719 --> 00:54:03,840
Speaker 1: the door. I needed to be alone. I was sobbing

1199
00:54:04,080 --> 00:54:07,480
Speaker 1: and just throwing my stuff in bags. I had texted

1200
00:54:07,480 --> 00:54:09,359
Speaker 1: my mom to let her know what happened. I thought

1201
00:54:09,360 --> 00:54:11,520
Speaker 1: they were going to have to pick me up, since

1202
00:54:11,520 --> 00:54:14,160
Speaker 1: there's no way I could drive four hours like this.

1203
00:54:14,800 --> 00:54:16,719
Speaker 1: My fiance stood on the other side of the door,

1204
00:54:17,080 --> 00:54:19,880
Speaker 1: begging me to let him in. After a few minutes,

1205
00:54:20,040 --> 00:54:22,920
Speaker 1: when I could finally catch my breath, I let him

1206
00:54:22,920 --> 00:54:26,839
Speaker 1: in and locked the door behind him. I told him

1207
00:54:26,880 --> 00:54:30,080
Speaker 1: what happened while still crying. He sighed and went to

1208
00:54:30,120 --> 00:54:32,520
Speaker 1: go talk to his mom. He told her that what

1209
00:54:32,560 --> 00:54:37,880
Speaker 1: she said was extremely inappropriate. She agreed that it was inappropriate. However,

1210
00:54:37,920 --> 00:54:40,560
Speaker 1: stood by what she said and started listening why I

1211
00:54:40,600 --> 00:54:44,279
Speaker 1: didn't need to have kids? Broa What She's like, Yeah,

1212
00:54:44,360 --> 00:54:47,840
Speaker 1: going wrong, but let me let me do it some more.

1213
00:54:48,040 --> 00:54:49,880
Speaker 2: You're like yeah, I was wrong. Let me double down.

1214
00:54:50,160 --> 00:54:52,040
Speaker 2: Let me double down though, because I wasn't wrong the

1215
00:54:52,120 --> 00:54:52,640
Speaker 2: right way.

1216
00:54:52,960 --> 00:54:56,799
Speaker 1: I felt so empty. I continued packing everything I had

1217
00:54:56,800 --> 00:54:59,520
Speaker 1: brought for myself. I moved all of the toddlers things

1218
00:54:59,520 --> 00:55:01,919
Speaker 1: together to a more accessible place for his family, since

1219
00:55:01,960 --> 00:55:06,080
Speaker 1: I planned on leaving alone. She never apologized. She stood around.

1220
00:55:06,360 --> 00:55:08,480
Speaker 1: He tried to talk to her. I could hear it

1221
00:55:08,560 --> 00:55:11,120
Speaker 1: between my crying. I did my best to ignore it,

1222
00:55:11,120 --> 00:55:13,200
Speaker 1: but she was yelling. She talked about how I wasn't

1223
00:55:13,239 --> 00:55:15,520
Speaker 1: involved in us with the tather. I try to be

1224
00:55:15,560 --> 00:55:18,280
Speaker 1: as involved as possible, but I cannot make any decisions

1225
00:55:18,280 --> 00:55:21,799
Speaker 1: for her or take her myself anywhere I wish I could,

1226
00:55:21,800 --> 00:55:24,120
Speaker 1: I really do, but no one else aside from my fiance,

1227
00:55:24,600 --> 00:55:27,239
Speaker 1: would be comfortable with it. They aren't even comfortable with

1228
00:55:27,239 --> 00:55:31,160
Speaker 1: me being involved in any conversations regarding her future or

1229
00:55:31,200 --> 00:55:34,560
Speaker 1: her mother. Eventually, he was back at the door, asking

1230
00:55:34,560 --> 00:55:37,000
Speaker 1: me to let him inside. I did. I told him

1231
00:55:37,000 --> 00:55:39,640
Speaker 1: that I appreciated what he said and it was okay

1232
00:55:39,760 --> 00:55:42,520
Speaker 1: if he wanted to stay here, but I was going home.

1233
00:55:43,080 --> 00:55:45,080
Speaker 1: He tried to talk me out of it, but then

1234
00:55:45,200 --> 00:55:47,960
Speaker 1: said that he was coming to I told him that

1235
00:55:48,000 --> 00:55:52,240
Speaker 1: I no longer wanted his mother to be in my life.

1236
00:55:53,080 --> 00:55:55,839
Speaker 2: WHOA, Yeah, I wouldn't want that person in my life either.

1237
00:55:56,120 --> 00:55:56,960
Speaker 2: Not gonna lie.

1238
00:55:56,840 --> 00:55:59,000
Speaker 1: If I told him that I wasn't going to prevent

1239
00:55:59,080 --> 00:56:01,960
Speaker 1: him or his daughter from seeing her, but that I

1240
00:56:02,120 --> 00:56:06,600
Speaker 1: wasn't going to I understood how important she was to

1241
00:56:06,680 --> 00:56:09,320
Speaker 1: him and his daughter, but I couldn't do anything around

1242
00:56:09,320 --> 00:56:13,280
Speaker 1: her anymore. I told him that I was done making

1243
00:56:13,440 --> 00:56:16,719
Speaker 1: excuses for her and apologizing to her when I got

1244
00:56:16,800 --> 00:56:21,120
Speaker 1: upset at something she said. She has never once apologized

1245
00:56:21,320 --> 00:56:23,960
Speaker 1: for anything she has said to me or about me,

1246
00:56:24,320 --> 00:56:26,759
Speaker 1: and I've always had to apologize to her, despite having

1247
00:56:27,000 --> 00:56:30,640
Speaker 1: never said anything back or argued. I've always just taken it.

1248
00:56:30,680 --> 00:56:33,000
Speaker 1: No matter what she said or yelled at me, I

1249
00:56:33,040 --> 00:56:35,960
Speaker 1: remained quiet and would leave to cry alone. I was

1250
00:56:36,000 --> 00:56:39,480
Speaker 1: always being told by various people anytime this happened that

1251
00:56:39,600 --> 00:56:43,279
Speaker 1: it was just how she is, and did not take

1252
00:56:43,320 --> 00:56:46,920
Speaker 1: it to heart. He sighed, but agreed. He said he

1253
00:56:46,960 --> 00:56:49,680
Speaker 1: wouldn't make me be around her. I asked him a

1254
00:56:49,680 --> 00:56:52,640
Speaker 1: few more times if he was sure that he wanted

1255
00:56:52,680 --> 00:56:57,000
Speaker 1: to leave with me. I told him that my parents

1256
00:56:57,280 --> 00:57:00,200
Speaker 1: could come down and one of them could bring my

1257
00:57:00,280 --> 00:57:02,799
Speaker 1: car back while I rode with the other that he

1258
00:57:02,920 --> 00:57:06,239
Speaker 1: didn't have to leave, and neither did his daughter. They

1259
00:57:06,239 --> 00:57:08,600
Speaker 1: could stay and enjoy the rest of the day and

1260
00:57:08,640 --> 00:57:12,080
Speaker 1: the following day and it wouldn't upset me. He insisted

1261
00:57:12,120 --> 00:57:14,640
Speaker 1: on coming with me, but wanted his daughter to stay

1262
00:57:14,680 --> 00:57:17,880
Speaker 1: with his family so that they could have the full vacation.

1263
00:57:18,720 --> 00:57:22,160
Speaker 1: His brother and his brother's girlfriend knocked, asking if they

1264
00:57:22,160 --> 00:57:25,360
Speaker 1: could come in. They told me I did nothing wrong,

1265
00:57:25,440 --> 00:57:27,960
Speaker 1: that it was just how she was and did not

1266
00:57:28,080 --> 00:57:30,360
Speaker 1: take it to heart. They said that I was strong

1267
00:57:30,440 --> 00:57:32,880
Speaker 1: for being able to take what she said and what

1268
00:57:33,120 --> 00:57:35,720
Speaker 1: she has said in the past and still be with

1269
00:57:35,720 --> 00:57:39,320
Speaker 1: my fiance. They showed me a crab they had caught

1270
00:57:39,720 --> 00:57:40,480
Speaker 1: to cheer me up.

1271
00:57:40,800 --> 00:57:43,640
Speaker 2: Cool. Hey, it worked a little. It's like, hey, I

1272
00:57:45,040 --> 00:57:48,160
Speaker 2: caught this crustacean. I was hoping it might I was

1273
00:57:48,240 --> 00:57:49,000
Speaker 2: thinking of you.

1274
00:57:50,120 --> 00:57:53,880
Speaker 1: I was still crying, but I smiled at their kindness.

1275
00:57:54,520 --> 00:57:55,240
Speaker 2: It worked.

1276
00:57:55,400 --> 00:57:59,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, Sometimes when someone's in a crabby mood, they need

1277
00:58:00,320 --> 00:58:06,720
Speaker 1: just that little crab. The girlfriend said that if it

1278
00:58:06,800 --> 00:58:08,840
Speaker 1: was her, she would have left a long time ago

1279
00:58:08,880 --> 00:58:11,000
Speaker 1: because of it. I admitted that in the past I

1280
00:58:11,000 --> 00:58:13,240
Speaker 1: almost did. They talked to me a few more minutes.

1281
00:58:13,360 --> 00:58:16,400
Speaker 1: I thanked them, gave the girlfriend a hug, and they left.

1282
00:58:16,960 --> 00:58:19,480
Speaker 1: We finished packing and we left around ten pm. We

1283
00:58:19,560 --> 00:58:22,000
Speaker 1: went into the gas station to fill up, use the restrooms,

1284
00:58:22,040 --> 00:58:24,640
Speaker 1: and get some snacks for the road. I don't think

1285
00:58:24,640 --> 00:58:27,040
Speaker 1: I stopped crying. I cried for so long that my

1286
00:58:27,080 --> 00:58:31,840
Speaker 1: eyes swelled shut and I fell asleep. I woke up

1287
00:58:31,880 --> 00:58:34,560
Speaker 1: an hour or so later, about halfway through the car ride,

1288
00:58:35,080 --> 00:58:39,240
Speaker 1: and just silently cried. My fiance. It kept trying to

1289
00:58:39,400 --> 00:58:42,200
Speaker 1: tear me up and talk to me. I would talk

1290
00:58:42,240 --> 00:58:44,200
Speaker 1: to him, but the tears won't stop, no matter how

1291
00:58:44,200 --> 00:58:46,920
Speaker 1: badly I wanted them to. I felt so hurt and

1292
00:58:46,920 --> 00:58:49,720
Speaker 1: empty would hurt. Worse was when he said that she

1293
00:58:49,840 --> 00:58:53,160
Speaker 1: made valid points about why we shouldn't have any kids

1294
00:58:53,240 --> 00:58:55,520
Speaker 1: right now. I told him that I didn't think I

1295
00:58:55,560 --> 00:58:57,840
Speaker 1: was cut out to have kids, and then I made

1296
00:58:58,000 --> 00:58:59,280
Speaker 1: a terrible mother.

1297
00:58:59,640 --> 00:59:00,000
Speaker 2: Oh.

1298
00:59:00,080 --> 00:59:02,720
Speaker 1: He was hurt that I had said that and try

1299
00:59:02,760 --> 00:59:05,080
Speaker 1: to get me to calm down. He kept talking about

1300
00:59:05,120 --> 00:59:07,920
Speaker 1: how much I did for his daughter and how great

1301
00:59:08,000 --> 00:59:10,840
Speaker 1: I was with her, but all I could hear was

1302
00:59:10,920 --> 00:59:14,680
Speaker 1: him saying that she made valid points and their arguments

1303
00:59:14,680 --> 00:59:18,120
Speaker 1: from earlier. I'm still pretty hurt by it all, and

1304
00:59:18,120 --> 00:59:21,240
Speaker 1: it's been five days. Now, I know better than to

1305
00:59:21,280 --> 00:59:24,520
Speaker 1: think she will ever apologize. I never want to have

1306
00:59:24,840 --> 00:59:28,320
Speaker 1: to be around her again. I don't want to enter

1307
00:59:28,440 --> 00:59:30,840
Speaker 1: her apartment when we have to drop Slash pick off

1308
00:59:30,840 --> 00:59:33,440
Speaker 1: his daughter. I don't want her at our wedding or

1309
00:59:33,440 --> 00:59:37,600
Speaker 1: in our possible future kids' lives if we even have kids.

1310
00:59:37,880 --> 00:59:40,640
Speaker 1: He still wants her to be at the wedding and

1311
00:59:40,680 --> 00:59:43,680
Speaker 1: in our hypothetical kids' lives. The most I have agreed

1312
00:59:43,720 --> 00:59:45,320
Speaker 1: to is to wait in the car when we go

1313
00:59:45,360 --> 00:59:48,000
Speaker 1: to pickup Slash drop off his daughter. I will not

1314
00:59:48,920 --> 00:59:51,520
Speaker 1: go in her apartment. He agreed to do that, but

1315
00:59:51,640 --> 00:59:52,360
Speaker 1: is disappointed.

1316
00:59:52,720 --> 00:59:55,240
Speaker 2: How was he disappointed in you and not his mom.

1317
00:59:55,480 --> 00:59:57,720
Speaker 1: I have tried for nearly two years to build a

1318
00:59:57,720 --> 01:00:00,320
Speaker 1: relationship with his mother, and I feel like every time

1319
01:00:00,360 --> 01:00:02,880
Speaker 1: it starts to build, stuff like this happens. I know

1320
01:00:02,960 --> 01:00:05,080
Speaker 1: she means a lot to him, and that is why

1321
01:00:05,160 --> 01:00:07,880
Speaker 1: I have tried so hard. She was even one of

1322
01:00:07,920 --> 01:00:12,480
Speaker 1: the first outside family people to know about me not

1323
01:00:12,560 --> 01:00:17,960
Speaker 1: being able to have children. So am I overreacting? Should

1324
01:00:18,040 --> 01:00:20,960
Speaker 1: I apologize to her and his family for overreacting and

1325
01:00:21,000 --> 01:00:24,280
Speaker 1: bringing drama in their vacation. Should I stand my ground

1326
01:00:24,320 --> 01:00:27,240
Speaker 1: politely at it change spacing so it isn't a wall

1327
01:00:27,360 --> 01:00:30,440
Speaker 1: of text, and there is an updates. Been a little

1328
01:00:30,440 --> 01:00:33,200
Speaker 1: over a week since I made my original post. I've

1329
01:00:33,240 --> 01:00:35,560
Speaker 1: spoken with my fiance about this and how I feel

1330
01:00:35,600 --> 01:00:39,080
Speaker 1: about it. He spoke with his mother about it, and

1331
01:00:39,120 --> 01:00:42,880
Speaker 1: she said that the closest I will get to an

1332
01:00:42,920 --> 01:00:46,240
Speaker 1: apology is her admitting that she was wrong to say it,

1333
01:00:47,160 --> 01:00:49,720
Speaker 1: which she has done to him. She has not spoken

1334
01:00:49,760 --> 01:00:51,560
Speaker 1: to me at all or even tried to message me.

1335
01:00:52,000 --> 01:00:54,560
Speaker 1: I do not have her blocked anywhere. She and his

1336
01:00:54,600 --> 01:00:56,680
Speaker 1: family have said that she would have said that to

1337
01:00:56,880 --> 01:00:59,600
Speaker 1: anyone in that situation, and it wasn't just me. So

1338
01:00:59,640 --> 01:01:02,160
Speaker 1: she's just a piece of work, just in general, and

1339
01:01:02,280 --> 01:01:05,840
Speaker 1: I think that's worse, to be honest. I am conflicted

1340
01:01:06,480 --> 01:01:09,680
Speaker 1: on whether or not I should consider an apology. On

1341
01:01:09,680 --> 01:01:11,760
Speaker 1: one hand, she has admitted that she was wrong. On

1342
01:01:11,800 --> 01:01:14,280
Speaker 1: the other hand, I wasn't the one she said that too,

1343
01:01:14,600 --> 01:01:17,880
Speaker 1: and she has said that that is the closest I

1344
01:01:17,880 --> 01:01:20,760
Speaker 1: will ever get to an apology. My Beyonce has said

1345
01:01:20,800 --> 01:01:22,960
Speaker 1: that if I still do not want her in the wedding,

1346
01:01:23,080 --> 01:01:25,680
Speaker 1: that's okay. He said that to keep the peace with

1347
01:01:25,760 --> 01:01:28,200
Speaker 1: his family, he would just not invite anyone on his side,

1348
01:01:28,680 --> 01:01:30,920
Speaker 1: which I do not think he would do or should do.

1349
01:01:32,200 --> 01:01:33,760
Speaker 1: You should be able to invite other people in his

1350
01:01:33,800 --> 01:01:36,800
Speaker 1: family without being an issue, but he insists.

1351
01:01:36,400 --> 01:01:38,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's just you're making it worse. You're just making

1352
01:01:38,920 --> 01:01:39,600
Speaker 2: it worse. Now.

1353
01:01:39,840 --> 01:01:42,520
Speaker 1: I feel really awful about it, and that's the main

1354
01:01:42,640 --> 01:01:45,600
Speaker 1: reason I've been conflicted on whether or not I should

1355
01:01:45,680 --> 01:01:49,919
Speaker 1: consider her admitting she was wrong to him as an apology.

1356
01:01:50,360 --> 01:01:52,560
Speaker 1: I do think that I will continue to keep any

1357
01:01:52,560 --> 01:01:55,360
Speaker 1: contact with her at a minimal amount. Aside from that,

1358
01:01:55,760 --> 01:01:58,439
Speaker 1: I'm just not sure. Nothing feels like the right move.

1359
01:01:58,840 --> 01:02:01,760
Speaker 1: Accepting her telling him she was wrong to say that

1360
01:02:01,800 --> 01:02:03,800
Speaker 1: to me as an apology makes me feel like it's

1361
01:02:03,840 --> 01:02:07,200
Speaker 1: really not an apology, which it's not, and what happen again,

1362
01:02:07,480 --> 01:02:09,320
Speaker 1: but not accepting it makes me feel like I've gone

1363
01:02:09,320 --> 01:02:11,920
Speaker 1: too far. Allowing her in the wedding without a proper

1364
01:02:12,000 --> 01:02:15,920
Speaker 1: apology makes me feel like a doormat, but not allowing

1365
01:02:15,920 --> 01:02:18,640
Speaker 1: her makes me feel awful. I'm just really unsure about

1366
01:02:18,680 --> 01:02:21,640
Speaker 1: it all, to be completely honest, no matter what I feel,

1367
01:02:21,920 --> 01:02:24,440
Speaker 1: it just feels like a bad decision. The only thing

1368
01:02:24,480 --> 01:02:26,560
Speaker 1: I'm sure about is keeping her at a distance, so

1369
01:02:26,600 --> 01:02:29,680
Speaker 1: it will not have a chance to happen again. By

1370
01:02:29,800 --> 01:02:32,560
Speaker 1: the way, what should always happen again is you listening

1371
01:02:32,600 --> 01:02:35,920
Speaker 1: to our podcast, Okay Storytime. Wherever you get your podcasts,

1372
01:02:36,000 --> 01:02:39,040
Speaker 1: just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite podcast

1373
01:02:39,080 --> 01:02:41,880
Speaker 1: app and search Okay Storytime. There's a relevant update which

1374
01:02:41,880 --> 01:02:43,760
Speaker 1: I'm just going to get straight into for some context

1375
01:02:43,800 --> 01:02:45,840
Speaker 1: about the wedding. It is planned to be very small.

1376
01:02:46,040 --> 01:02:47,600
Speaker 1: We want to do it in a court, and we

1377
01:02:47,640 --> 01:02:50,080
Speaker 1: are still okay with his family. Mother in law included

1378
01:02:50,400 --> 01:02:53,400
Speaker 1: to be at the party afterwards. The discussion was purely

1379
01:02:53,480 --> 01:02:57,480
Speaker 1: about the actual wedding. Likely it would just have been

1380
01:02:57,680 --> 01:03:01,280
Speaker 1: our respective parents. However, he wanted to not have either

1381
01:03:01,320 --> 01:03:03,440
Speaker 1: of his parents because it would cause a bunch of

1382
01:03:03,480 --> 01:03:06,840
Speaker 1: drama if he only invited his dad, or his dad

1383
01:03:06,880 --> 01:03:09,240
Speaker 1: would have brought her instead. It's not like he was

1384
01:03:09,320 --> 01:03:12,800
Speaker 1: uninviting his entire family. I probably should have clarified that

1385
01:03:12,880 --> 01:03:17,080
Speaker 1: in the original Postay, and that's where that ends. Hey,

1386
01:03:17,120 --> 01:03:18,760
Speaker 1: it's Sam. We're gonna get back to the stories. But

1387
01:03:18,800 --> 01:03:20,480
Speaker 1: here's three minutes bads from our sponsors.

1388
01:03:21,000 --> 01:03:25,080
Speaker 4: My mother in law keeps crossing our boundaries. I finally snapping.

1389
01:03:26,200 --> 01:03:29,000
Speaker 4: I'm thirty. Female mother in law moved into the just

1390
01:03:29,120 --> 01:03:31,440
Speaker 4: no status a little over a year ago when my

1391
01:03:31,560 --> 01:03:34,640
Speaker 4: husband and I found out that we were expecting. She

1392
01:03:34,720 --> 01:03:37,760
Speaker 4: can be very loving and helpful, but then she'll use

1393
01:03:37,760 --> 01:03:41,400
Speaker 4: that as an excuse to boundary stomp and guilt trip.

1394
01:03:42,000 --> 01:03:44,800
Speaker 4: I've decided to no longer accept any sort of assistance

1395
01:03:44,800 --> 01:03:48,320
Speaker 4: from her because it always comes with strings attached. By

1396
01:03:48,320 --> 01:03:51,080
Speaker 4: the way, this comes from Pickled Carrot nineteen and if

1397
01:03:51,120 --> 01:03:52,400
Speaker 4: you want to send in your own stories, go to

1398
01:03:52,440 --> 01:03:55,840
Speaker 4: the r slash Okay storytime. Cebrend It nice. So I

1399
01:03:55,880 --> 01:03:58,080
Speaker 4: gave birth to my son back in June. We did

1400
01:03:58,080 --> 01:04:01,320
Speaker 4: not allow hospital visitors, did not allow home visitors the

1401
01:04:01,320 --> 01:04:04,720
Speaker 4: first week, and we do not allow kissing. All of

1402
01:04:04,760 --> 01:04:08,040
Speaker 4: this caused my mother in law to become hysterical. She

1403
01:04:08,080 --> 01:04:11,440
Speaker 4: accused us of trying to keep her grandson and wanting

1404
01:04:11,440 --> 01:04:14,080
Speaker 4: her out of our lives. She complained to anyone who

1405
01:04:14,160 --> 01:04:16,400
Speaker 4: listened about how terrible it was that they were keeping

1406
01:04:16,400 --> 01:04:17,360
Speaker 4: our newborn from.

1407
01:04:17,240 --> 01:04:18,360
Speaker 2: Her for a week.

1408
01:04:18,840 --> 01:04:21,560
Speaker 4: For seven days, time passed and now our baby is

1409
01:04:21,600 --> 01:04:24,840
Speaker 4: seven months old. She got over the no visitors incident

1410
01:04:24,840 --> 01:04:27,160
Speaker 4: and has now decided she will not adhere to the

1411
01:04:27,280 --> 01:04:32,480
Speaker 4: no kissing rule, but only when my husband is not around.

1412
01:04:33,280 --> 01:04:35,479
Speaker 4: I have caught her kissing him multiple times, and each

1413
01:04:35,520 --> 01:04:37,800
Speaker 4: time I take my son back and firmly told her no,

1414
01:04:38,040 --> 01:04:40,800
Speaker 4: I'm guessing because like germs. Yes, my husband and I

1415
01:04:40,880 --> 01:04:43,480
Speaker 4: talked about it and agreed that she is no longer

1416
01:04:43,560 --> 01:04:46,200
Speaker 4: allowed to hold our son until she proves that she

1417
01:04:46,240 --> 01:04:49,840
Speaker 4: can be respectful of our boundaries. We significantly reduce contact

1418
01:04:49,840 --> 01:04:51,880
Speaker 4: with her, but my husband believes that she's not bad

1419
01:04:52,000 --> 01:04:54,240
Speaker 4: enough to go full no contact with because of her

1420
01:04:54,240 --> 01:04:57,000
Speaker 4: attitude shift in recent times. He believes still grow out

1421
01:04:57,000 --> 01:04:59,200
Speaker 4: of it and become better. He is supportive of my

1422
01:04:59,240 --> 01:05:01,800
Speaker 4: decision to know longer try with her and assured me

1423
01:05:02,080 --> 01:05:04,040
Speaker 4: that he will be the one handling her so that

1424
01:05:04,040 --> 01:05:07,560
Speaker 4: way I don't have to deal with any of her bs. Yesterday,

1425
01:05:07,600 --> 01:05:09,360
Speaker 4: my mother in law called me and I ignored her

1426
01:05:09,400 --> 01:05:11,920
Speaker 4: call and told my husband. He said he would call

1427
01:05:11,920 --> 01:05:13,760
Speaker 4: her back in a minute, but she kept calling me,

1428
01:05:13,920 --> 01:05:16,160
Speaker 4: so I finally answered and I put her on speakerphone,

1429
01:05:16,200 --> 01:05:18,760
Speaker 4: and she immediately started ranting about how she saw the

1430
01:05:18,760 --> 01:05:22,080
Speaker 4: pictures I posted on Instagram of my husband and me

1431
01:05:23,480 --> 01:05:25,760
Speaker 4: kissing ours baby son's cheeks.

1432
01:05:26,480 --> 01:05:30,280
Speaker 2: That's different, he has our immune system.

1433
01:05:30,120 --> 01:05:32,600
Speaker 4: She said it wasn't fair that we're allowed to kiss

1434
01:05:32,640 --> 01:05:35,360
Speaker 4: our baby, but she wasn't. I finally lost it and

1435
01:05:35,440 --> 01:05:38,880
Speaker 4: I said, fair, you think it's not fair that I'm

1436
01:05:38,880 --> 01:05:41,280
Speaker 4: not allowed to kiss my baby? Was it fair that

1437
01:05:41,320 --> 01:05:44,160
Speaker 4: I was hospitalized twice because my nausea was so severe

1438
01:05:44,320 --> 01:05:47,080
Speaker 4: it caused me to be dangerously dehydrated? Was it fair

1439
01:05:47,120 --> 01:05:49,160
Speaker 4: that I spent the last month of my pregnancy with

1440
01:05:49,200 --> 01:05:52,480
Speaker 4: a fractured rib because of my baby? Was it fair

1441
01:05:52,600 --> 01:05:55,280
Speaker 4: the dear husband became the sole provider because I wasn't

1442
01:05:55,280 --> 01:05:58,280
Speaker 4: able to work anymore. Was it fair that dear husband

1443
01:05:58,480 --> 01:06:01,640
Speaker 4: was the only one who clean because I physically could

1444
01:06:01,640 --> 01:06:03,760
Speaker 4: not get out of bed for longer than an hour

1445
01:06:03,880 --> 01:06:07,040
Speaker 4: or two at a time. Was it fair that mine

1446
01:06:07,120 --> 01:06:11,320
Speaker 4: but had second degree tearing? Was it fair that I

1447
01:06:11,360 --> 01:06:15,720
Speaker 4: couldn't pee or dookie normally for weeks after I gave birth?

1448
01:06:16,080 --> 01:06:19,480
Speaker 4: Was it fair that dear husband footed the bill for

1449
01:06:19,600 --> 01:06:22,400
Speaker 4: all of the hospital visits, the diapers, the formula, the

1450
01:06:22,480 --> 01:06:26,880
Speaker 4: wipest clothing, and everything else our family needs. Is it

1451
01:06:27,040 --> 01:06:29,439
Speaker 4: fair the dear husband and I are the only ones

1452
01:06:29,480 --> 01:06:31,920
Speaker 4: losing sleep every single night because our baby wakes up

1453
01:06:31,960 --> 01:06:33,880
Speaker 4: every hour And no.

1454
01:06:34,800 --> 01:06:37,000
Speaker 2: It's I'm gonna go on on a lemon, say it's

1455
01:06:37,080 --> 01:06:40,160
Speaker 2: not fair to goa Is it fair? No?

1456
01:06:40,480 --> 01:06:42,720
Speaker 4: Is it fair the dear husband has to go to

1457
01:06:42,760 --> 01:06:46,120
Speaker 4: work every day and comes home and starts parenting without

1458
01:06:46,160 --> 01:06:49,360
Speaker 4: a break, Dakota, Is it fair that I spend all

1459
01:06:49,440 --> 01:06:52,520
Speaker 4: day every day with a screaming baby while covered in

1460
01:06:52,520 --> 01:06:53,400
Speaker 4: his drooling spit up?

1461
01:06:53,840 --> 01:06:57,480
Speaker 2: Of course it's fair. It's fair if you had a kid,

1462
01:06:57,640 --> 01:06:58,440
Speaker 2: because it's.

1463
01:06:58,440 --> 01:07:03,520
Speaker 4: Our baby, our baby, Dakota, to our baby, and that's

1464
01:07:03,560 --> 01:07:06,320
Speaker 4: exactly what we signed up for when we became parents.

1465
01:07:06,840 --> 01:07:09,760
Speaker 4: We endured every difficult part of parenthood so far, and

1466
01:07:09,800 --> 01:07:13,560
Speaker 4: we will enjoy all of our parenting privileges too. So yes,

1467
01:07:13,920 --> 01:07:17,800
Speaker 4: dear husband and I are gonna kiss our baby because.

1468
01:07:17,480 --> 01:07:18,360
Speaker 2: We made him.

1469
01:07:18,720 --> 01:07:21,360
Speaker 4: You do not have any parenting responsibilities or privileged with

1470
01:07:21,440 --> 01:07:25,160
Speaker 4: him because he is not your child, Dakota. Correct, Stop

1471
01:07:25,240 --> 01:07:28,440
Speaker 4: trying to relive your glory days by putting your mouth

1472
01:07:28,680 --> 01:07:30,080
Speaker 4: on someone else's baby.

1473
01:07:30,400 --> 01:07:32,920
Speaker 2: Keep your mouthed off my baby. And then I hung up,

1474
01:07:32,960 --> 01:07:34,000
Speaker 2: and then everyone clapp.

1475
01:07:33,880 --> 01:07:35,960
Speaker 4: I'm going to be honest and say that I had

1476
01:07:35,960 --> 01:07:38,360
Speaker 4: a speech planned. I knew one day that she would

1477
01:07:38,360 --> 01:07:40,960
Speaker 4: see me kiss my little chunky baby and claim that

1478
01:07:41,000 --> 01:07:43,080
Speaker 4: it was unfair, so I knew what I was going

1479
01:07:43,120 --> 01:07:46,120
Speaker 4: to say when that time came. Poor husband has been

1480
01:07:46,160 --> 01:07:48,520
Speaker 4: dealing with the fallout of the phone call. He was

1481
01:07:48,520 --> 01:07:50,440
Speaker 4: there for the whole thing. He and his mom are

1482
01:07:50,440 --> 01:07:52,320
Speaker 4: going out for lunch this weekend and he plans to

1483
01:07:52,320 --> 01:07:54,880
Speaker 4: have a serious talk with her. He's considering going no

1484
01:07:55,000 --> 01:07:57,400
Speaker 4: contact with her, but we will decide based on how

1485
01:07:57,400 --> 01:08:03,280
Speaker 4: their conversation goes. And we have an update. I'm just

1486
01:08:03,280 --> 01:08:06,040
Speaker 4: gonna jump right in. My husband had lunch with the

1487
01:08:06,080 --> 01:08:08,680
Speaker 4: mother in law yesterday. Before we went in, we sat

1488
01:08:08,720 --> 01:08:11,000
Speaker 4: down and wrote down all the talking points we wanted

1489
01:08:11,000 --> 01:08:12,680
Speaker 4: to discuss so we wouldn't forget any of them.

1490
01:08:12,760 --> 01:08:13,920
Speaker 1: During lunch, it.

1491
01:08:13,920 --> 01:08:17,400
Speaker 4: Went as expected. She was upset I wasn't there to

1492
01:08:17,439 --> 01:08:20,160
Speaker 4: apologize to her. Dear husband said it was because I

1493
01:08:20,200 --> 01:08:22,960
Speaker 4: had nothing to apologize for. She tried to lecture me

1494
01:08:23,000 --> 01:08:25,240
Speaker 4: about how hypocritical I am when I cut her off

1495
01:08:25,360 --> 01:08:27,599
Speaker 4: and listened all the things that she has done, starting

1496
01:08:27,600 --> 01:08:30,400
Speaker 4: for my pregnancy up until now. She repeatedly touched my

1497
01:08:30,479 --> 01:08:33,719
Speaker 4: belly without permission after being told to stop. She tried

1498
01:08:33,760 --> 01:08:35,920
Speaker 4: to invite her friends people we don't even know, to

1499
01:08:36,080 --> 01:08:38,840
Speaker 4: my baby shower. My parents hosted and paid for the

1500
01:08:38,960 --> 01:08:41,200
Speaker 4: entire thing. She threw a fit when we told her

1501
01:08:41,200 --> 01:08:42,960
Speaker 4: that we were picking out his name.

1502
01:08:43,320 --> 01:08:47,760
Speaker 2: Oh no, that's bad, dude. That's our baby. We get

1503
01:08:47,800 --> 01:08:49,439
Speaker 2: to pick our child's name.

1504
01:08:49,760 --> 01:08:52,479
Speaker 4: You already got your turn, granny, and we're not accepting

1505
01:08:52,520 --> 01:08:55,240
Speaker 4: any recommendations. She threw a fit when she found out

1506
01:08:55,280 --> 01:08:58,240
Speaker 4: she wasn't allowed in the delivery room. She threw a

1507
01:08:58,280 --> 01:09:00,920
Speaker 4: fit when she found out we wouldn't allow hospital visitors,

1508
01:09:01,080 --> 01:09:03,360
Speaker 4: and she even said, I wouldn't go.

1509
01:09:03,439 --> 01:09:06,760
Speaker 2: There to seealpee. I just want to see the little baby.

1510
01:09:07,680 --> 01:09:09,600
Speaker 3: You could just bring the baby down to lobby for

1511
01:09:09,640 --> 01:09:10,840
Speaker 3: me because I want to see them old.

1512
01:09:11,400 --> 01:09:16,479
Speaker 2: Yeah. Sure, let's bring the baby out of the doctor

1513
01:09:16,840 --> 01:09:21,080
Speaker 2: approved environment just so you can just spit all over it.

1514
01:09:21,320 --> 01:09:21,840
Speaker 2: Yeah great.

1515
01:09:22,160 --> 01:09:24,000
Speaker 4: She threw a fit when we told her no visitors

1516
01:09:24,000 --> 01:09:25,639
Speaker 4: at her home for a week. She threw a fit

1517
01:09:25,680 --> 01:09:27,639
Speaker 4: when she found out my mom was staying with us

1518
01:09:27,720 --> 01:09:28,760
Speaker 4: after to help us out.

1519
01:09:28,920 --> 01:09:29,519
Speaker 2: She threw a fit.

1520
01:09:29,600 --> 01:09:32,040
Speaker 4: Every time we said no to her taking the baby

1521
01:09:32,120 --> 01:09:35,400
Speaker 4: out alone to an outing, she threw a fit.

1522
01:09:35,560 --> 01:09:37,559
Speaker 2: We got more when we asked my sister a lot

1523
01:09:37,600 --> 01:09:39,000
Speaker 2: of babysit and not her.

1524
01:09:39,040 --> 01:09:41,040
Speaker 4: When my husband and I went on today, all heck

1525
01:09:41,080 --> 01:09:43,200
Speaker 4: broke loose when she found out we were going out

1526
01:09:43,240 --> 01:09:45,720
Speaker 4: of state to visit my family for Christmas instead of

1527
01:09:45,720 --> 01:09:46,639
Speaker 4: spending it with her.

1528
01:09:46,720 --> 01:09:51,200
Speaker 2: And then, of course, the kissing rule. Of course, the

1529
01:09:51,280 --> 01:09:54,880
Speaker 2: kissy kissy rules, the classic kissing rule. Shout it to

1530
01:09:54,960 --> 01:09:57,920
Speaker 2: Valentine's classic kissing rule. Oh god.

1531
01:09:58,320 --> 01:10:01,439
Speaker 4: Now, my husband told her that the refusal to respect

1532
01:10:01,439 --> 01:10:03,760
Speaker 4: her boundaries as new parents was proof that all she

1533
01:10:03,800 --> 01:10:06,760
Speaker 4: cared about was maintaining control over her children and grandchildren.

1534
01:10:07,040 --> 01:10:10,519
Speaker 4: Unfortunately for her, he was raised to prioritize family above

1535
01:10:10,600 --> 01:10:14,400
Speaker 4: all else, and now my son and I are his family. Dude,

1536
01:10:14,400 --> 01:10:17,559
Speaker 4: that's kind of a fire flip. Guy was cooking right there, Dude,

1537
01:10:17,640 --> 01:10:21,240
Speaker 4: bro was cooking out, So our needs come first. He

1538
01:10:21,320 --> 01:10:23,880
Speaker 4: informed her that we would be reducing our contacts so

1539
01:10:23,960 --> 01:10:25,880
Speaker 4: our son won't grow up think it gets normal for

1540
01:10:25,920 --> 01:10:29,479
Speaker 4: adults to throw temper tantrums or weaponized relationships with family.

1541
01:10:30,000 --> 01:10:32,000
Speaker 4: He recommended that she go to therapy so she can

1542
01:10:32,080 --> 01:10:35,479
Speaker 4: understand her desire for complete control. He also reassured her

1543
01:10:35,479 --> 01:10:37,559
Speaker 4: that he loves her very much, but is not willing

1544
01:10:37,560 --> 01:10:39,840
Speaker 4: to let his wife and son suffer just so she

1545
01:10:39,960 --> 01:10:41,320
Speaker 4: can feel good about herself.

1546
01:10:41,640 --> 01:10:45,160
Speaker 2: Are we are? We in Master Chef right now because

1547
01:10:45,640 --> 01:10:47,160
Speaker 2: Opie's husband continues to cook.

1548
01:10:47,280 --> 01:10:49,479
Speaker 4: I mean, they're both cooking, but her husband just he

1549
01:10:49,600 --> 01:10:52,160
Speaker 4: just enlabled a flame mignol of words.

1550
01:10:52,479 --> 01:10:56,559
Speaker 2: The parents in this story are getting down like it's

1551
01:10:56,640 --> 01:10:57,479
Speaker 2: Iron Chef.

1552
01:10:57,760 --> 01:11:00,360
Speaker 4: He would shut it down by telling her that if

1553
01:11:00,400 --> 01:11:02,839
Speaker 4: she wanted to have any sort of relationship with her grandson,

1554
01:11:03,080 --> 01:11:03,920
Speaker 4: then she would need to.

1555
01:11:03,840 --> 01:11:05,759
Speaker 2: Be quiet and listen for once in her life.

1556
01:11:05,880 --> 01:11:07,600
Speaker 4: He told her that if she could prove herself to

1557
01:11:07,640 --> 01:11:10,719
Speaker 4: respect our decisions as parents, then we would happily spend

1558
01:11:10,800 --> 01:11:13,120
Speaker 4: more time with her. As soon as he returned from lunch,

1559
01:11:13,320 --> 01:11:16,800
Speaker 4: he broke down crying. He has never really stood up

1560
01:11:16,840 --> 01:11:19,280
Speaker 4: for himself in a meaningful way to his parents ever.

1561
01:11:19,760 --> 01:11:21,960
Speaker 4: I know this was a heavy conversation for him, but

1562
01:11:22,040 --> 01:11:24,479
Speaker 4: I am so proud of him for putting his foot down.

1563
01:11:24,720 --> 01:11:25,280
Speaker 2: What pre do you do?

1564
01:11:26,000 --> 01:11:28,080
Speaker 4: I talked with my sister in law about the whole situation.

1565
01:11:28,200 --> 01:11:30,800
Speaker 4: She's married to dear husband's brother. She said that mother

1566
01:11:30,840 --> 01:11:32,599
Speaker 4: in law did the same exact type of thing when

1567
01:11:32,600 --> 01:11:34,840
Speaker 4: she had heard two babies and warned me about it

1568
01:11:34,880 --> 01:11:40,800
Speaker 4: when we announced our pregnancy. Oh this baby fever, repeat offender.

1569
01:11:41,240 --> 01:11:43,559
Speaker 4: Dear husband knew this behavior was going to happen, and

1570
01:11:43,600 --> 01:11:45,840
Speaker 4: we knew all along with our couple's counselor, and we

1571
01:11:45,920 --> 01:11:48,639
Speaker 4: talked about how to navigate it. And if you want

1572
01:11:48,720 --> 01:11:54,240
Speaker 4: to talking about navigating your life, there's literally no better

1573
01:11:54,320 --> 01:11:57,439
Speaker 4: place to do that than by going to Spotify, Apple Podcast,

1574
01:11:57,520 --> 01:12:02,120
Speaker 4: your favorite pod app, and searching Okay, storytelling because why Dakota, Because.

1575
01:12:01,880 --> 01:12:05,160
Speaker 2: There you will find full episodes with stories just like this.

1576
01:12:05,439 --> 01:12:06,240
Speaker 2: We've heard from brother in.

1577
01:12:06,240 --> 01:12:08,120
Speaker 4: Law and sister in law that she called them to complain,

1578
01:12:08,200 --> 01:12:10,719
Speaker 4: to play the victim, but brother in law shut her down,

1579
01:12:10,920 --> 01:12:13,240
Speaker 4: saying that she did the exact same thing when sister

1580
01:12:13,360 --> 01:12:16,120
Speaker 4: law was pregnant and we were absolutely right coming to

1581
01:12:16,160 --> 01:12:16,599
Speaker 4: her defense.

1582
01:12:17,120 --> 01:12:19,400
Speaker 2: For now, I guess dear husband and I are just

1583
01:12:19,479 --> 01:12:21,080
Speaker 2: moving on. If she wants to.

1584
01:12:21,000 --> 01:12:23,840
Speaker 4: Reach out and apologize, then great, but we are not

1585
01:12:23,880 --> 01:12:26,880
Speaker 4: putting any effort into a relationship with her. Dear husband

1586
01:12:26,880 --> 01:12:29,640
Speaker 4: feels confident that we made the right decision for me.

1587
01:12:29,800 --> 01:12:31,840
Speaker 4: Seeing him stand off for us and put her needs

1588
01:12:31,840 --> 01:12:34,639
Speaker 4: first was so attractive that it has.

1589
01:12:34,560 --> 01:12:40,800
Speaker 2: Me heavily considering making baby number two bound. Chick down

1590
01:12:41,400 --> 01:12:53,280
Speaker 2: down bound tick and Dawn down down brown woun Oh yeah, yeah, yeah,

1591
01:12:53,320 --> 01:12:54,839
Speaker 2: and that's the end of the story.