WEBVTT - Single for the Summer

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Carefully Reckless, the production of Our Heart Radio

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<v Speaker 1>and the Black Effect, And just like that, we're back

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<v Speaker 1>on the air. Welcome back to yet another Carefully Reckless

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<v Speaker 1>episode with your girl. Just hilarious and y'all know what

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<v Speaker 1>time it is. Just fix my mess Now. It seems

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<v Speaker 1>like carefully Reckless has turned into therapy and I love

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<v Speaker 1>doing it. I love Tony, I love hearing about y'all

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<v Speaker 1>reckless situations and how careful y'all are being, and how

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<v Speaker 1>reckless some of y'all are being, and how to goddamn

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<v Speaker 1>careful y'all being. But that's not gonna stop me from

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<v Speaker 1>helping you guys where I feel I can. So we're

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<v Speaker 1>gonna jump right into it. These were sent to the

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<v Speaker 1>Carefully Reckless d M. By the way, where you can

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<v Speaker 1>submit yours if you need Jes to fix your mess

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<v Speaker 1>or to help fix your mess. We're gonna start with

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<v Speaker 1>this young lady, just please fix my mess. I am

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<v Speaker 1>African American and I'm dating a Callcasian man l Mayo.

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<v Speaker 1>Look she she laughed after that, because she probably thought

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<v Speaker 1>I was gonna laugh. No, keep on. We've been dating

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<v Speaker 1>for almost seven years now. I've never really had to

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<v Speaker 1>worry about any racism until now. My first encounter was

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<v Speaker 1>when I had to move into his cousin's house with

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<v Speaker 1>him because my mom kicked me out. I wanted to

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<v Speaker 1>invite my brother over to hang out, but it never happened.

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<v Speaker 1>Didn't think anything of it until my boyfriend told me why.

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<v Speaker 1>He said his cousin said he didn't want my brother

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<v Speaker 1>coming over because he doesn't want him to steal anything.

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<v Speaker 1>My brother is an amazing black man. He would never

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<v Speaker 1>do something even close to that ship piss me off.

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<v Speaker 1>But whatever, I'm going to stop right now to tell

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<v Speaker 1>you that's your first mistake brushing that ship off. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>gonna continue. Then, me and his brother got into an

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<v Speaker 1>argument one day in front of their friends about him

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<v Speaker 1>not being able to say the N word if it's

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<v Speaker 1>in a song. My boyfriend and I moved next door

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<v Speaker 1>to his brother didn't have anywhere else to go. We

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<v Speaker 1>were all having a get together. Friends were in our

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<v Speaker 1>backyard and the brother was in his yard. My boyfriend

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<v Speaker 1>mentioned that he wanted to watch a basketball game. His

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<v Speaker 1>brother said to bring a TV outside. I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>who's TV? Not mine? Too much going on over there?

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<v Speaker 1>His brother said, well, ain't that what they do in

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<v Speaker 1>the hood. I said, I don't know. I've never been.

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<v Speaker 1>He responded and said, well, your hair looks like you've

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<v Speaker 1>been in the hood. I had foe locks in my hair.

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<v Speaker 1>He said this in front of everyone, and no one

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<v Speaker 1>said anything. They might have even laughed as well. I

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<v Speaker 1>told my boyfriend and he said his brother was just

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<v Speaker 1>joking and brushed it off like he always does. He's

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<v Speaker 1>made several little comments like that, always says something about

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<v Speaker 1>my hair or just me being black in general. What

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<v Speaker 1>should I do at the end of the day. That's

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<v Speaker 1>his family and they aren't going anywhere. We have a

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<v Speaker 1>daughter together as well, which makes it worse. Well, ain't

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<v Speaker 1>that about a black bitch? Because now he has a

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<v Speaker 1>niece that is also black and white. She's by racial

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<v Speaker 1>but you can't take away from her being black, which

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<v Speaker 1>is something that the brother clearly dislikes or hates. Now,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna tell you where you went wrong. I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>blaming you for this whole situation, but this kind of

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<v Speaker 1>has me. I rate alright, sweetheart. Earlier in your story,

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<v Speaker 1>you said you brushed something off right, the comment about

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<v Speaker 1>your brother not being able to come over to their

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<v Speaker 1>house because he didn't want him to steal anything. He

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<v Speaker 1>already stereotyped your brother. I don't know if you thought

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<v Speaker 1>that deep into it or you just brushed it off

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<v Speaker 1>because you love his brother so much. But baby, you

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<v Speaker 1>chose him over your brother. Subconsciously, you did that. That's

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<v Speaker 1>something that should have never rolled off your back. I

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<v Speaker 1>don't give a funk if you had to stay in

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<v Speaker 1>their house or not. If you did that just to

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<v Speaker 1>keep a roof over your head, that ain't the roof

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<v Speaker 1>I would want to be living under. I would live

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<v Speaker 1>outside before I live with a racist piece of ship.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm telling you that who you are is more powerful

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<v Speaker 1>then who the funk you're with. I don't like that

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<v Speaker 1>your skin color is a threat to them. Your brother

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<v Speaker 1>was a threat to them, not because he thought he

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<v Speaker 1>was still something. But these people are intimidated by us,

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<v Speaker 1>to say the least over anything that we do. Now,

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<v Speaker 1>you didn't tell me much about your boyfriend, because the

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<v Speaker 1>brother seems to be the problem here. But your boyfriend

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<v Speaker 1>is the fucking problem if he don't check his brother.

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<v Speaker 1>But that's his family. What he likes his brother may

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<v Speaker 1>not like, but he still needs to demand respect from

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<v Speaker 1>his brother. You now have a child with him, and

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<v Speaker 1>I bet you, before you even got pregnant, you were

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<v Speaker 1>experiencing racism. You said you didn't experience it until now. No, no, no,

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe you weren't paying enough attention, or maybe you were

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<v Speaker 1>just turning a blind eye to it. You were ignoring

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<v Speaker 1>it purposely because you were so in love with whoever

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<v Speaker 1>the funk your boyfriend is. Now, I may seem like

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<v Speaker 1>I'm coming at you and your man, and respectfully, baby,

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<v Speaker 1>I am. We can't change the way his brother feels.

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<v Speaker 1>We probably can't even change how you feel about your man.

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<v Speaker 1>But you cannot be okay with abuse, verbally, mentally, racially, whatever.

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<v Speaker 1>You cannot ever be okay with that because you want

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<v Speaker 1>something to work so badly, because now you have a baby.

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<v Speaker 1>Will he treat your baby how he treats you. You

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<v Speaker 1>said you had locks in your hair, and he affiliated

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<v Speaker 1>locks with the hood. He affiliated bringing TVs outside with

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<v Speaker 1>the hood, As if white people don't have hoods, as

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<v Speaker 1>if white people don't live in trailer parks, as if

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<v Speaker 1>white people are all clean and ship, as if child listen,

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<v Speaker 1>m hm mm hmmm. Because white people can be some

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<v Speaker 1>of the dirtiest, most disgusting motherfucking people that walk this

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<v Speaker 1>earth but turn up their noses at us, they put

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<v Speaker 1>us down. Are you understanding really what I'm saying, sweetheart?

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<v Speaker 1>Because your Instagram name is black Queen. Okay, now I'm

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<v Speaker 1>not gonna put the exact name out there, but in

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<v Speaker 1>your Instagram name it's black Queen. Do you really think

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<v Speaker 1>that of yourself? Because if you don't, no one else will.

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<v Speaker 1>And I'm gonna tell you what I mean by this.

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<v Speaker 1>The moment you believe that you are a black queen,

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<v Speaker 1>you start treating yourself that way, you start carrying yourself

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<v Speaker 1>that way, and motherfucker's will know that ship speaks for itself.

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<v Speaker 1>You're a black queen and you know it. You wear

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<v Speaker 1>it outside and in. So if you were wearing that

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<v Speaker 1>ship the whole time, even while you were living in

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<v Speaker 1>your boyfriend's brother's house or even being around them and

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<v Speaker 1>ship like that, I guarantee you he wouldn't hate you

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<v Speaker 1>to your face. He would not show that ship to

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<v Speaker 1>your face. You were too timid, you let that ship happen,

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<v Speaker 1>which is why he kept running with that ship. And

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<v Speaker 1>the brother is so fucking weak, Your boyfriend so fucking weak,

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<v Speaker 1>he don't even know he got a black queen. He

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<v Speaker 1>does not, or he would never let his brother even

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<v Speaker 1>fix his little white tight ass. No lip have an

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<v Speaker 1>ass mouth to say anything like that to you. Yes

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<v Speaker 1>you need to fucking leave, Yes you do. And I

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<v Speaker 1>don't even really be telling people that you need to leave.

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<v Speaker 1>And you need to get your daughter out of that

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<v Speaker 1>ship or she will be treated the way you were treated.

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<v Speaker 1>But it's gonna hurt her even worse because this is

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<v Speaker 1>going to happen as a child. She's a child. I

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<v Speaker 1>wouldn't trust them bitches around my baby. I wouldn't even

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<v Speaker 1>trust them to be alone with her by herself. She

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<v Speaker 1>would not be able to go over her uncle's house,

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<v Speaker 1>or her grandparents house or not, none of the motherfucker's

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<v Speaker 1>on his side. She, my baby, would not be able

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<v Speaker 1>to be around any of them, none of them prejudice

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<v Speaker 1>pieces of ship, I promise you. So that story had

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<v Speaker 1>me a little all right, But you need to put

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<v Speaker 1>yourself first. You ain't your baby for or your baby.

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<v Speaker 1>That's all I'm gonna saying. Mhm m hmm. Moving on,

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<v Speaker 1>This is a short one. Hey, jas Me and this

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<v Speaker 1>guy broke up and he said he's trying to get

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<v Speaker 1>himself together, but since then we've been distant and don't

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<v Speaker 1>really talk or see each other no more. But I

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<v Speaker 1>don't feel like it's another female. But I don't know

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<v Speaker 1>if I should just leave it alone or just have patience. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm going to give you a nice piece of advice.

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<v Speaker 1>And this is not even only pertaining to your situation.

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<v Speaker 1>This is pertaining to people period. Sometimes people do have

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<v Speaker 1>to get themselves together because a lot of people getting

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<v Speaker 1>relationships and don't even really have theirselves together. People getting

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<v Speaker 1>relationships and and they have things that they need to

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<v Speaker 1>work on so they can understand themselves better so they

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<v Speaker 1>can know what they want. A lot of people getting

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<v Speaker 1>relationships and don't even know what they want. How you

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<v Speaker 1>going to know what another person wants and even be

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<v Speaker 1>able to give it to them if you don't even

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<v Speaker 1>know what you require? You know, so, I wouldn't ignore

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<v Speaker 1>the fact that he said he wants to get himself together.

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<v Speaker 1>He could be doing that. It could be another female,

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<v Speaker 1>it could not be we don't know. And the fact

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<v Speaker 1>that you said that you don't think it is. We're

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<v Speaker 1>just going to x that out completely because I don't

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<v Speaker 1>know him. You know him, and you know him better

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<v Speaker 1>than we do you know? And I say we me

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<v Speaker 1>and the carefully reckless listeners. We don't know him like

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<v Speaker 1>you know him. So I'm going to take your word

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<v Speaker 1>that there is not another female. How was he acting

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<v Speaker 1>when you guys were together? What led up to the breakup?

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<v Speaker 1>What did he say? You know what I mean? Was

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<v Speaker 1>he acting weird? Now, I'm sorry, weird is not the

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<v Speaker 1>not not a good word to use. I have to

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<v Speaker 1>be careful when I'm using that word, because just because

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<v Speaker 1>something is unusual doesn't mean it's weird. So was he

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<v Speaker 1>acting unusual? Was it kind of abrupt? Was things going on?

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<v Speaker 1>Did he seemed bothered at times? Did he seemed down?

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<v Speaker 1>Did he seemed you know, you have to study a person.

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<v Speaker 1>If you're going to be with them, you have to

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<v Speaker 1>get to know them. I just need to be able

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<v Speaker 1>to know what you saw. It's good to have patience

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<v Speaker 1>with everything, but it's still is always good for you

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<v Speaker 1>to take care of yourself and do what's right for

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<v Speaker 1>you and do what's best for you, because if you're

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<v Speaker 1>ready for love and he's not, if you didn't do

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<v Speaker 1>anything to help him make that decision of not being

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<v Speaker 1>with you anymore or taking some time off of the

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<v Speaker 1>relationship to get itself together. Then I think you should

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<v Speaker 1>move forward. He'll come back if that is what he wants.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe your relationship is not going to be what he

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<v Speaker 1>wants for another three years. Do you then wait for him? No,

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<v Speaker 1>you have to put yourself first, baby girl, always, always

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<v Speaker 1>and forever. Put yourself first because it's the right thing.

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<v Speaker 1>It's good for your mental Maybe he just wasn't mentally stable.

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<v Speaker 1>I do think you should check in on him every

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<v Speaker 1>now and then, not even trying to get with him

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<v Speaker 1>or not even you know, trying to see him or whatever.

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<v Speaker 1>Just extend an ear, Just extend a hello, just extend

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<v Speaker 1>a greeting. Just hey, how are you. I know, last

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<v Speaker 1>time we left off you said you were trying to

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<v Speaker 1>get yourself together or whatever. Are you okay or I'm

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<v Speaker 1>not saying this to get back with you. I'm just

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<v Speaker 1>checking in on a friend. Address him as friend, and

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<v Speaker 1>depending on how he reacts to that, you'll know if

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<v Speaker 1>he just didn't want you and want somebody else, or

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<v Speaker 1>if he really just needs a friend and not a girlfriend,

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<v Speaker 1>because sometimes that's the case as well. But I trust

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<v Speaker 1>that you would make a good decision with that. Hold up,

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<v Speaker 1>Hold up, I know the ship getting good, but listen

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<v Speaker 1>to just a couple of seconds of a commercial. If

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<v Speaker 1>you love me, you'll listen. Moving on to the next one. Hey, jass,

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<v Speaker 1>So my baby father is in jail and he recently called,

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<v Speaker 1>not to talk to you, his daughter, but to talk

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<v Speaker 1>to me. He was saying how he appreciates me and

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<v Speaker 1>all I did for him when things were good, and

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<v Speaker 1>how he's going to be a better father. He was

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<v Speaker 1>sorry for the abuse and everything I told him. His

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<v Speaker 1>apology don't mean ship to me. I need to see actions,

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<v Speaker 1>but I'm scared to even give him a chance to

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<v Speaker 1>show himself because of the stuff he did to me.

0:11:55.559 --> 0:11:59.560
<v Speaker 1>Please help well, baby girl. The fact that he calls

0:11:59.600 --> 0:12:02.360
<v Speaker 1>you to talk to you and not his baby, that's

0:12:02.360 --> 0:12:06.280
<v Speaker 1>a sign right there. I mean now, I do give

0:12:06.320 --> 0:12:09.400
<v Speaker 1>him credit for apologizing to you, because some men can't

0:12:09.400 --> 0:12:12.160
<v Speaker 1>even find it in their hearts to apologize after doing

0:12:12.200 --> 0:12:14.760
<v Speaker 1>a woman wrong. You know, it's just their pride a

0:12:14.800 --> 0:12:18.840
<v Speaker 1>lot of the times. But he did apologize. But after

0:12:18.880 --> 0:12:21.600
<v Speaker 1>a while, apologies are like broken records, you know what

0:12:21.640 --> 0:12:24.040
<v Speaker 1>I'm saying. It's just like I'm tired of hearing it

0:12:24.320 --> 0:12:27.040
<v Speaker 1>and seeing no action behind it. Yes, you do need action.

0:12:27.240 --> 0:12:30.040
<v Speaker 1>But you also have to think about this. He's in jail,

0:12:30.520 --> 0:12:33.080
<v Speaker 1>and we know not every man in jail, but a

0:12:33.080 --> 0:12:36.360
<v Speaker 1>lot of men in jail. They get there and they

0:12:36.360 --> 0:12:38.959
<v Speaker 1>don't have women in jail to talk to. They're confined.

0:12:39.240 --> 0:12:42.520
<v Speaker 1>They're isolated from the outside world, from friends, from family,

0:12:42.640 --> 0:12:45.640
<v Speaker 1>from bitches and holes, you know, from girls and all that.

0:12:45.640 --> 0:12:49.120
<v Speaker 1>Ship and so the people that they depend on. It's

0:12:49.160 --> 0:12:52.000
<v Speaker 1>easy to depend on you, guys, because you are the

0:12:52.040 --> 0:12:56.320
<v Speaker 1>only ones giving them attention. So it's easy to jail

0:12:56.360 --> 0:12:59.480
<v Speaker 1>talk me out of my panties. It's easy to tell

0:12:59.559 --> 0:13:01.880
<v Speaker 1>me what you're gonna do when you get home, and

0:13:01.920 --> 0:13:05.120
<v Speaker 1>all the changes that you're gonna make when you're home

0:13:05.200 --> 0:13:07.679
<v Speaker 1>and all that. And then when you get home, I'll

0:13:07.679 --> 0:13:09.920
<v Speaker 1>give you a chance, and you still do the same ship. Now,

0:13:09.960 --> 0:13:11.360
<v Speaker 1>I don't know him, I don't know his past, I

0:13:11.400 --> 0:13:14.360
<v Speaker 1>don't know his pattern. Is this something that happens all

0:13:14.400 --> 0:13:17.760
<v Speaker 1>the time, Because you just answered your own question. If so,

0:13:18.520 --> 0:13:21.480
<v Speaker 1>you don't fall for ship like this just because a

0:13:21.520 --> 0:13:23.840
<v Speaker 1>man is telling you this ship repeatedly every day on

0:13:23.880 --> 0:13:25.760
<v Speaker 1>the phone, because he's in jail. This is what he's

0:13:25.800 --> 0:13:28.840
<v Speaker 1>going to do. But he didn't even ask to talk

0:13:28.840 --> 0:13:32.079
<v Speaker 1>to his baby. Before he hung up. He didn't say,

0:13:32.160 --> 0:13:33.960
<v Speaker 1>let me speak to her, let me hear her voice.

0:13:33.960 --> 0:13:35.960
<v Speaker 1>But he told you he's going to be a better father.

0:13:36.000 --> 0:13:39.280
<v Speaker 1>Well listen. That's how you can start. Call and speak

0:13:39.320 --> 0:13:41.760
<v Speaker 1>to her. Call and talk to her. Call and ask

0:13:41.800 --> 0:13:44.439
<v Speaker 1>her how her day has been. Call and ask her

0:13:44.440 --> 0:13:48.440
<v Speaker 1>her favorite color. Caller explained to her that you're not there,

0:13:48.440 --> 0:13:50.960
<v Speaker 1>but you're going to be there. That's how you can

0:13:51.000 --> 0:13:54.959
<v Speaker 1>start by being a good father. Because you physically can't

0:13:55.000 --> 0:13:58.200
<v Speaker 1>reach out and touch her, Sir, you physically can't put

0:13:58.200 --> 0:14:01.280
<v Speaker 1>her to bed. You physically can't be there to hug

0:14:01.320 --> 0:14:03.720
<v Speaker 1>her in the morning when she wakes up, So you

0:14:03.760 --> 0:14:07.640
<v Speaker 1>can start by verbally doing these things, always telling her

0:14:07.640 --> 0:14:09.679
<v Speaker 1>how beautiful she is, how how much you love her.

0:14:10.080 --> 0:14:12.840
<v Speaker 1>But no, you call and beg and plead your case

0:14:12.920 --> 0:14:17.960
<v Speaker 1>to her mother. Sweetheart, I think you should tell him

0:14:18.000 --> 0:14:22.560
<v Speaker 1>these things. You should voice how you feel about him

0:14:22.640 --> 0:14:26.600
<v Speaker 1>being a good father right now, doing as much as

0:14:26.640 --> 0:14:30.440
<v Speaker 1>he can do with what he has. If your heart

0:14:30.520 --> 0:14:32.520
<v Speaker 1>is in it, I wouldn't tell you to give up,

0:14:32.720 --> 0:14:34.320
<v Speaker 1>but I would tell you, even when he gets home,

0:14:34.400 --> 0:14:37.680
<v Speaker 1>make his ass work to show you that's where he

0:14:37.760 --> 0:14:40.080
<v Speaker 1>really wants to be that he is sorry for the

0:14:40.120 --> 0:14:42.760
<v Speaker 1>abuse in the past. Now, you didn't specify the type

0:14:42.800 --> 0:14:46.840
<v Speaker 1>of abuse. You didn't say whether it's emotional, physical, verbal.

0:14:47.000 --> 0:14:49.080
<v Speaker 1>You didn't say that it could be all three, it

0:14:49.120 --> 0:14:52.000
<v Speaker 1>could be just one. But whatever abuse it is, none

0:14:52.360 --> 0:14:56.000
<v Speaker 1>is worse than the other. Abuse is abuse, And I

0:14:56.040 --> 0:15:00.680
<v Speaker 1>feel that you should still pace yourself even when he

0:15:00.720 --> 0:15:03.360
<v Speaker 1>gets home if you still feel like you want to,

0:15:03.720 --> 0:15:06.240
<v Speaker 1>but it's that's something holding you back. Listen to that

0:15:06.400 --> 0:15:10.600
<v Speaker 1>something and make him work to be in your life. Intimately,

0:15:11.040 --> 0:15:13.560
<v Speaker 1>he has to be a father to his daughter, and

0:15:13.600 --> 0:15:15.520
<v Speaker 1>if you feel that he's not a danger to her,

0:15:15.760 --> 0:15:19.560
<v Speaker 1>then that's all you guys. Can focus on him being

0:15:19.600 --> 0:15:23.200
<v Speaker 1>a dad first before he's a man to you. Okay,

0:15:23.600 --> 0:15:27.360
<v Speaker 1>moving on to the last one. You'll really are giving

0:15:27.440 --> 0:15:29.920
<v Speaker 1>me some ship to work with today. Okay, I'm still

0:15:29.960 --> 0:15:32.560
<v Speaker 1>not even over the races, dude. I'm I'm so piste

0:15:32.560 --> 0:15:34.840
<v Speaker 1>off with this ship, but I'm I'm gonna keep my

0:15:34.880 --> 0:15:37.480
<v Speaker 1>cool because it's about just fixing the mess, not making

0:15:37.480 --> 0:15:42.800
<v Speaker 1>ship messy. Earth mhmm. All right, hey, Jess, I'm going

0:15:42.840 --> 0:15:44.960
<v Speaker 1>to try to keep this short. My X and I

0:15:45.040 --> 0:15:47.680
<v Speaker 1>dated for about four years and now have been broken up.

0:15:47.680 --> 0:15:50.400
<v Speaker 1>For about a year going towards the end of the month.

0:15:50.800 --> 0:15:53.560
<v Speaker 1>My question is should I be triggered by her actions

0:15:53.600 --> 0:15:56.640
<v Speaker 1>over the last year. She is now engaged and was

0:15:56.720 --> 0:16:00.400
<v Speaker 1>proposed to four months after we broke up. I'm glad

0:16:00.440 --> 0:16:02.160
<v Speaker 1>that she is happy and has found the person that

0:16:02.200 --> 0:16:03.840
<v Speaker 1>wants to spend the rest of his life with her,

0:16:03.920 --> 0:16:07.400
<v Speaker 1>but things just aren't adding up. My female best friends

0:16:07.400 --> 0:16:09.960
<v Speaker 1>were lurking on her page after I told them not

0:16:10.080 --> 0:16:12.440
<v Speaker 1>to tell me anything and found out that her new

0:16:12.480 --> 0:16:15.560
<v Speaker 1>man said something along the lines of I've loved this

0:16:15.560 --> 0:16:18.680
<v Speaker 1>woman for the past seven years, and she replied, I've

0:16:18.720 --> 0:16:21.480
<v Speaker 1>been in love with you just as long. Mind you.

0:16:21.720 --> 0:16:24.920
<v Speaker 1>We dated for four of those years, and she's never

0:16:25.000 --> 0:16:28.600
<v Speaker 1>mentioned this guy at all. Mind you. She's still trying

0:16:28.640 --> 0:16:31.560
<v Speaker 1>to act all friendly with my family and sister to

0:16:31.640 --> 0:16:34.280
<v Speaker 1>this day, and my sister even asked her before we

0:16:34.320 --> 0:16:36.880
<v Speaker 1>broke up if there was another man. She said, no,

0:16:37.200 --> 0:16:39.640
<v Speaker 1>should I feel betrayed. Let me tell you what you

0:16:39.640 --> 0:16:44.520
<v Speaker 1>should feel, sweetie. You should be happy. You should feel relieved.

0:16:44.760 --> 0:16:47.360
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna tell you that's what you should feel. You

0:16:47.360 --> 0:16:51.880
<v Speaker 1>should feel like there was a weight lifted from your shoulders.

0:16:51.920 --> 0:16:55.560
<v Speaker 1>You should feel like the luckiest man in the world

0:16:55.640 --> 0:16:59.480
<v Speaker 1>that you did not have to experience finding out that

0:17:00.120 --> 0:17:02.400
<v Speaker 1>she was in love with somebody else while you were

0:17:02.480 --> 0:17:06.680
<v Speaker 1>with her. You should be jumping for fucking joy because

0:17:06.720 --> 0:17:09.320
<v Speaker 1>there is a woman out there waiting for you that

0:17:09.400 --> 0:17:13.800
<v Speaker 1>you now won't miss the chance to be with because

0:17:13.840 --> 0:17:17.040
<v Speaker 1>you're not with this girl anymore. Because you felt she

0:17:17.200 --> 0:17:19.920
<v Speaker 1>was for you, but she did not feel the same.

0:17:20.040 --> 0:17:23.440
<v Speaker 1>You are a space filler until she got the courage

0:17:23.800 --> 0:17:26.480
<v Speaker 1>to leave you to go be with the person that

0:17:26.560 --> 0:17:29.760
<v Speaker 1>she really wanted to be with. Now. She didn't want

0:17:29.760 --> 0:17:33.320
<v Speaker 1>to hurt you. That's why she's still being so cool

0:17:33.400 --> 0:17:37.200
<v Speaker 1>with your family, and she probably still don't hate you.

0:17:37.560 --> 0:17:39.919
<v Speaker 1>She don't want you to hurt. She never wanted you

0:17:40.000 --> 0:17:43.120
<v Speaker 1>to hurt, but she was just not in love with you.

0:17:43.119 --> 0:17:46.040
<v Speaker 1>You weren't her person. I'm happy for her, but I'm

0:17:46.040 --> 0:17:50.400
<v Speaker 1>even happier for your ass because there is somebody out

0:17:50.440 --> 0:17:53.840
<v Speaker 1>here waiting for you. You're a good guy. Obviously you

0:17:53.960 --> 0:17:55.920
<v Speaker 1>bet not be no day and push over, but you

0:17:56.119 --> 0:17:59.560
<v Speaker 1>are a good guy and you are the prize. I

0:17:59.600 --> 0:18:02.320
<v Speaker 1>want you to know that, King, you are the fucking prize.

0:18:02.720 --> 0:18:05.080
<v Speaker 1>Think about how you would have felt if you would

0:18:05.080 --> 0:18:08.000
<v Speaker 1>have found out she was cheating on you. Think about

0:18:08.040 --> 0:18:11.760
<v Speaker 1>that because in this situation, you were the other guy.

0:18:12.160 --> 0:18:14.960
<v Speaker 1>It seems like he was. But they have been secret

0:18:15.000 --> 0:18:18.480
<v Speaker 1>lovers for seven years. You were dating her for four

0:18:18.560 --> 0:18:20.919
<v Speaker 1>of those years, so that means that they were just

0:18:20.960 --> 0:18:24.840
<v Speaker 1>working through some problems maybe, and you were just a

0:18:24.920 --> 0:18:29.000
<v Speaker 1>rebound or someone that was occupying the time and loving

0:18:29.040 --> 0:18:32.359
<v Speaker 1>her and whatever else you were doing for her until

0:18:32.400 --> 0:18:34.760
<v Speaker 1>they got their shipped together. Now that their ship is together,

0:18:34.760 --> 0:18:39.080
<v Speaker 1>they're happily married. You shouldn't worry about that ship. And

0:18:39.119 --> 0:18:41.959
<v Speaker 1>it's easier said than done. But trust me, you are

0:18:42.080 --> 0:18:46.439
<v Speaker 1>doing yourself a disservice, still trying to investigate the past,

0:18:47.000 --> 0:18:51.000
<v Speaker 1>trying to investigate, and they're sleeping together at night, happy

0:18:51.040 --> 0:18:54.080
<v Speaker 1>that neither one of them have to lie anymore to

0:18:54.359 --> 0:18:58.359
<v Speaker 1>another person. I think your female best friends and your

0:18:58.400 --> 0:19:01.760
<v Speaker 1>sisters they should also cut ties. I think your family,

0:19:01.880 --> 0:19:04.320
<v Speaker 1>all of them, they should cut ties because that's not

0:19:04.400 --> 0:19:10.040
<v Speaker 1>doing anything but raising more suspicion and more anguish for you,

0:19:10.200 --> 0:19:12.399
<v Speaker 1>and it's keeping you stuck in the past or you

0:19:12.440 --> 0:19:17.240
<v Speaker 1>can't move forward amicably, and you should be able to. No,

0:19:17.400 --> 0:19:20.800
<v Speaker 1>you should not feel betrayed, babe. Not now. The only

0:19:20.840 --> 0:19:23.120
<v Speaker 1>time you would feel betrayed is if you were still

0:19:23.200 --> 0:19:26.560
<v Speaker 1>with her, it's okay because you dodged the motherfucking bullet.

0:19:27.080 --> 0:19:29.720
<v Speaker 1>And just like that, I'm going to end this episode

0:19:29.800 --> 0:19:33.040
<v Speaker 1>on that note. Y'all tune in each and every Wednesday

0:19:33.040 --> 0:19:35.840
<v Speaker 1>at seven am to carefully reckless shout out to The

0:19:35.840 --> 0:19:38.200
<v Speaker 1>Black Effect, shout out to I Heart Media, and also

0:19:38.280 --> 0:19:43.360
<v Speaker 1>shout out to Reckless Discussions primiering tonight episode. Make sure

0:19:43.400 --> 0:19:45.760
<v Speaker 1>you catch it, listen and love it, and in my

0:19:45.840 --> 0:21:00.359
<v Speaker 1>deepest Pam voice, mmmmmm, I can't believe ark. This is

0:21:00.359 --> 0:21:03.040
<v Speaker 1>a production of I Heart Radio and The Black Effect.

0:21:03.320 --> 0:21:05.879
<v Speaker 1>For more podcasts from I Heart Radio, visit the I

0:21:06.000 --> 0:21:09.480
<v Speaker 1>Heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to

0:21:09.520 --> 0:21:10.280
<v Speaker 1>your favorite shows.