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Speaker 1: Hi, and welcome back to a another new episode of

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Speaker 1: Couch Talks. My name is Kat, and if you're new,

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Speaker 1: couch Talks is the special bonus Q and a episode

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Speaker 1: of You Need Therapy that comes out every Wednesday, where

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Speaker 1: I answer questions that you guys send into me at

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Speaker 1: Catherine at You Need Therapy podcast dot com. And as always,

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Speaker 1: let me give the gentle reminder that even though I'm

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Speaker 1: answering questions from you guys, this itself is not therapy

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Speaker 1: and I am just a licensed therapist who is talking

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Speaker 1: to you through a podcast. First of all, I would

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Speaker 1: like to say I was so grateful for all of

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Speaker 1: the feedback and all of the things from the episode

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Speaker 1: that came out on Monday about exercise addiction. It's so

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Speaker 1: funny because you know, I put out a poll on

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Speaker 1: my Instagram slash. If you don't follow me, you can

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Speaker 1: follow me at at Cat dot de fata. But I

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Speaker 1: put out this poll because I was toying between a

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Speaker 1: couple of different ideas about the episode. And I think

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Speaker 1: that out of the four exercise addiction was number three.

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Speaker 1: But I just like felt something inside my body saying

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Speaker 1: like you need to do an episode on this, and

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Speaker 1: I got to be honest. You know, you're your own

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Speaker 1: worst critic. Just because I'm a therapist doesn't mean that

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Speaker 1: I don't have, you know, some thoughts that aren't always

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Speaker 1: the nicest about myself. It wasn't my favorite episode I've

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Speaker 1: ever done. And of course I'm like, I could have

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Speaker 1: done this better. I could have said this better, I

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Speaker 1: could have explained this better. But the truth is I

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Speaker 1: have time to do that in the future. I can

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Speaker 1: always do another episode. This is me therapizing myself. But

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Speaker 1: also it sounds like some of it is really what

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Speaker 1: some of you guys just needed to hear. And I

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Speaker 1: love that, and I think that obviously there's a reason

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Speaker 1: that it was pulled to do that episode. If you

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Speaker 1: haven't listened to it, go listen to it. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: I just wanted to say thank you for all the

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Speaker 1: people that have reached out and said that that was helpful.

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Speaker 1: I wish I would have had something like that to

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Speaker 1: listen to when I was going through my stuff. So

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Speaker 1: I'm with you, guys, I'm with you. I also, I

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Speaker 1: just want to express more than ever how much I

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Speaker 1: appreciate you guys just trusting me so much. So many

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Speaker 1: of the emails that I get from you guys, say

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Speaker 1: like you're somebody that I trust, and I value your

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Speaker 1: feedback and your perspective, and I value the fact that

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Speaker 1: you value that, And it means a lot that there

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Speaker 1: has been some kind of connection felt through this podcast.

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Speaker 1: And even though I don't know all of you guys,

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Speaker 1: and I don't hear you talking, it does mean a

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Speaker 1: lot to me that there are people on the other

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Speaker 1: side of this whatever device you're listening to, who are

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Speaker 1: really digging in and connecting with the stuff that I'm saying.

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Speaker 1: Because I hope that I'm developing conversations for you guys

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Speaker 1: in your real lives and within yourselves, and that just

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Speaker 1: like never will get old hearing. So thank you for

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Speaker 1: letting me know I appreciate that. With that, if you

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Speaker 1: are feeling some kind of connection and you want to

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Speaker 1: rate the podcast, you can slide down to the autom

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Speaker 1: if you're listening on Apple Podcasts and give us a

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Speaker 1: little review. I would very much love that. So normally,

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Speaker 1: if you're new, normally I do two questions. I keep

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Speaker 1: them anonymous, and I usually answer two of them from

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Speaker 1: you guys. But I've got a handful of emails asking

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Speaker 1: my opinion on medications when it comes to mental health.

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Speaker 1: And I've gotten a lot of very specific questions, and

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Speaker 1: I'm going to choose not to answer the specific questions because,

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Speaker 1: like anything, but even more like when it comes to medication,

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Speaker 1: there are so many variables that I can't even give

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Speaker 1: an opinion on because I don't know the specifics. But

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Speaker 1: what I've done is I've pulled some of the themes

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Speaker 1: out of the questions that I've gotten. I'm gonna talk

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Speaker 1: about some of the themes in this episode rather than

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Speaker 1: just read the listener emails and then answer those. Cool. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So the three themes that I've picked from the emails

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Speaker 1: that I've gotten are one, what do I think about

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Speaker 1: taking medication when it comes to mental health? General ideas

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Speaker 1: to what do I say to a doctor who appears

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Speaker 1: to be pushing medication that either I don't want to

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Speaker 1: take or I'm afraid of? And Three, how do I

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Speaker 1: approach friends who appear to be mismanaging their medication or

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Speaker 1: who I want to suggest medication too? So those are

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Speaker 1: the three that we're gonna talk about, and we're gonna

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Speaker 1: start with the first one. So, what does Cat think

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Speaker 1: about taking medication? For mental health issues, disorders, problems, however

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Speaker 1: you want to label it. First, I would like to

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Speaker 1: say I thank God for the ability and the option

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Speaker 1: to do this, I really do. And then secondly, I

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Speaker 1: would like to say I am not a doctor and

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Speaker 1: I'm not a medical provider that has the ability to

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Speaker 1: prescribe medication. Nor do I know all the ins and

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Speaker 1: outs in the specifics that one who is going to

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Speaker 1: really talk about this should know. I'm not an expert

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Speaker 1: on medication at all, but I do have some feelings

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Speaker 1: as somebody who works in a industry that sometimes requires

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Speaker 1: clients to try or experiment or engage, age or think

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Speaker 1: about or process the idea of using these medications. I

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Speaker 1: also believe that this is such a deeply personal decision

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Speaker 1: and a deeply personal thing, and that doesn't mean it

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Speaker 1: needs to be secret, but it means that you have

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Speaker 1: the option for it to be secret. You don't have

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Speaker 1: to tell people about this stuff. And because you believe

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Speaker 1: something and something's right for you doesn't mean that it's

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Speaker 1: right for everybody. And just because one thing works for

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Speaker 1: your friend doesn't mean it's going to work for me.

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Speaker 1: And again, variables, so there also is still a stigma

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Speaker 1: around taking medication for mental health. And I think that's

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Speaker 1: really what I got from the questions that I was

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Speaker 1: hearing of, Like there's a there's still such a stigma

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Speaker 1: around medication. What do you think do you think somebody

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Speaker 1: should just go to therapy to work on depression? Do

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Speaker 1: you think somebody should take anxiety of medication? All of

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Speaker 1: the questions around that, And what I also hear a

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Speaker 1: lot is I don't want to end up being dependent

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Speaker 1: on something when I have these conversations with clients, especially,

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Speaker 1: and it makes me feel weak or something is wrong

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Speaker 1: with me. Um. So there's a stigma around being dependent.

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Speaker 1: And then there's this stigma around like, oh, it means

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Speaker 1: that there's either something wrong with you or that you're

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Speaker 1: a weak person because you need this kind of help.

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Speaker 1: And honestly, there are certain things that talk therapy, experiential

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Speaker 1: therapy therapy that I do just cannot alone change. So

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Speaker 1: what I usually ask people, because I don't tell people

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Speaker 1: what to do, I can recommend things based on my

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Speaker 1: experience of my clients. And I'm definitely somebody who is

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Speaker 1: pro medication when it's warranted. But I asked them when

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Speaker 1: the stigma stuff comes up, if they would feel the

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Speaker 1: same way about taking that medication for a physical illness,

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Speaker 1: maybe something like cancer. And if the answer is no,

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Speaker 1: then we have a lot of processing and work to do,

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Speaker 1: because I don't see these things any differently. Somebody cannot

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Speaker 1: just snap their fingers and get rid of something like depression,

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Speaker 1: and just like you can't snap your fingers and get

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Speaker 1: rid of something like cancer, you can't like will it

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Speaker 1: away or be tough enough to make it go away.

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Speaker 1: And like I said, I never forced somebody to take medication,

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Speaker 1: But what I will do is talk about the benefits

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Speaker 1: and their fears around them or why they may want

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Speaker 1: to take the medication. And I think it's also okay

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Speaker 1: to alleviate some of your symptoms that you're experiencing through

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Speaker 1: other avenues before you go straight to medication. And again,

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Speaker 1: I think the conversation is so complicated because it depends

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Speaker 1: on what medication we're even talking about. There are so

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Speaker 1: many different kinds of medication used for mental health. But

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Speaker 1: I think all on all, my opinion that I think

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Speaker 1: some of you guys were wondering about is that, of course,

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Speaker 1: like sometimes it is such a blessing to be able

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Speaker 1: to have this, and sometimes it is something that's abused,

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Speaker 1: and we have to really be aware of both sides

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Speaker 1: of those and take it client by client, experience by experience,

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Speaker 1: and monitor it. Okay, so the second part is what

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Speaker 1: do I say to a doctor who appears to be

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Speaker 1: pushing medication that I don't want to take? Or maybe

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Speaker 1: what do I say to a doctor who's pushing a

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Speaker 1: medication that I'm afraid of taking? And well, what an

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Speaker 1: opportunity to set a boundary right here? Right? So, what

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Speaker 1: an opportunity to be able to really dig into you

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Speaker 1: and what you're feeling and how you're feeling. And I

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Speaker 1: know this is intimidating because doctors are supposed to like

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Speaker 1: know what to do and how to help you, and

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Speaker 1: sometimes we can feel like we don't know enough information

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Speaker 1: to ask questions or to push back. But I think

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Speaker 1: that's important to listen to what your body is saying.

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Speaker 1: And I also think that when it comes to mental

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Speaker 1: health medications or medications that you're using to help with

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Speaker 1: mental health issues, if you're just going to a general doctor,

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Speaker 1: you might want to ask for a referral to see

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Speaker 1: somebody who specialize in what you're seeking help with. Right. So,

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Speaker 1: if I'm struggling with depression. I could go to my

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Speaker 1: general doctor and say, this is what I'm struggling with,

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Speaker 1: can you prescribe me this? And that's great. Some doctors

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Speaker 1: are really great at doing that. Also, I think it's

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Speaker 1: valid to see somebody who was more experience in dealing

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Speaker 1: in men managing things like depression. Psychiatry is different than

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Speaker 1: just your general family doctor. I also believe that if

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Speaker 1: you are taking medication for mental health, it's really important

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Speaker 1: to be also seeing a therapist, especially in the beginning,

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Speaker 1: because you can process the medication and the feelings around

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Speaker 1: taking the medication with um the therapist and not everything.

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Speaker 1: There's no absolutes in this conversation. I don't want anybody

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Speaker 1: to hear any absolutes. But most of the time, the

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Speaker 1: majority of the time, often it is important to see

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Speaker 1: a therapist before going straight to medication or seeing a

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Speaker 1: psychiatrist before just taking whatever medication your general family doctor

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Speaker 1: is prescribing. I think that is very important because there

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Speaker 1: are things that we are trained to look at and

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Speaker 1: see and talk about that play a huge role in

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Speaker 1: all of that. And it's just I mean, the feelings

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Speaker 1: around taking the medication in general, and the shifts and

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Speaker 1: the changes and what that means. So the boundaries what

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Speaker 1: I would say the pushy doctor, Also, you don't have

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Speaker 1: to do anything. You are the owner and you are

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Speaker 1: the decider of what you do with your your body

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Speaker 1: when it comes to what you put in it. And

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Speaker 1: so a doctor might say do this. But also I

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Speaker 1: don't want anybody to feel that just because one person

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Speaker 1: says something that you have to do it. I feel

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Speaker 1: that way in sessions with my clients. Just because I

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Speaker 1: make a suggestion or a recommendation, that doesn't mean I'm

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Speaker 1: the end all be all, And you're allowed to be

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Speaker 1: curious about my suggestions and my recommendations, and you're allowed

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Speaker 1: to push back, because I think that gives us a

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Speaker 1: bigger lesson in life of we're allowed to have a voice,

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Speaker 1: and pushing back isn't a bad thing, and that actually

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Speaker 1: can create a deeper understanding of yourself and the things

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Speaker 1: that are going on. And we push back for different reasons.

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Speaker 1: That kind of goes back to the question I was

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Speaker 1: saying above, But I digress. Let's move on to the

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Speaker 1: third part. So, how to approach friends who mismanage their

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Speaker 1: medication or you think that might benefit from medication. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So of course this also depends, and there are so

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Speaker 1: many variables again here to be specific at all. However,

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Speaker 1: I do think that there's a difference between suggesting a

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Speaker 1: friend try medication and checking in to see if a

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Speaker 1: friend is taking their medication or abuse in their medication,

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Speaker 1: or if you may notice some changes in them that

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Speaker 1: maybe they cannot see because they're them and you have

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Speaker 1: a different perspective. And this goes back to something I

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Speaker 1: talked about last week in regards to it's not always

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Speaker 1: our place to offer advice, and I believe that coming

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Speaker 1: from a place of wonder and coming from a place

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Speaker 1: of curiosity is much more helpful. And that's the difference

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Speaker 1: between I think you should try medication versus I wonder

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Speaker 1: if medication would be something that may help with what

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Speaker 1: you have just expressed to me. Have you ever processed

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Speaker 1: that or thought about that with your doctor, your therapist.

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Speaker 1: That's very different, feels different, sounds different, it's experience different.

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Speaker 1: And also what works for one person isn't always what's

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Speaker 1: going to work for the next. So we can't just

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Speaker 1: do what our friends do or tell our friends to

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Speaker 1: do something because it worked for us. So I think

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Speaker 1: it's very important for us to be very honest with

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Speaker 1: why we are suggesting what we're suggesting. We can express

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Speaker 1: our experience, but do that with some care, because we

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Speaker 1: also don't want to say this word for me, it's

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Speaker 1: gonna work for you, because it might not. And based

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Speaker 1: on somebody's physiological makeup, their experiences in their lives, all

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Speaker 1: of the things, what else they're struggling with when it

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Speaker 1: comes to life. The medications will interact in our your

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Speaker 1: body different, So there's that, and you know, it can

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Speaker 1: be really challenging to find the right balance when it

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Speaker 1: comes to medication management, especially when using more than one type.

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Speaker 1: It's exhausting, and sometimes there is a period of time

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Speaker 1: where we don't feel or act like ourselves because we're

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Speaker 1: adjusting to the mets or trying to figure out what

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Speaker 1: combination works best for us. And this is also why

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Speaker 1: I would suggest to come to your friends from a

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Speaker 1: place of wonder rather than assumption about what they're doing,

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Speaker 1: because it's just tough, it's hard, and instead of offering

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Speaker 1: assumptions or advice or whatever that might look like, it

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Speaker 1: might be helpful. And I know for me it would

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Speaker 1: be helpful to hear something like Hey, I've noticed some

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Speaker 1: changes in you, and I just wanted to check in

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Speaker 1: and ask if there is any way I can support

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Speaker 1: you or there if there are areas in your life

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Speaker 1: that I can support you better in, because this stuff

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Speaker 1: can be overwhelming and we don't always, we don't ever

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Speaker 1: really put everything out in the open that's going on

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Speaker 1: on the inside, and we can't judge people's insides by

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Speaker 1: their outsides. So that's just nice to hear, and that

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Speaker 1: is a really good way to care for the people

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Speaker 1: that you love. And when it comes down to it,

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Speaker 1: we have to let people kind of take the reins

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Speaker 1: on their lives at the end of the day. We

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Speaker 1: can express something like that, and and our friends can

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Speaker 1: accept support and ask for support and ask for what

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Speaker 1: they need, but we can't force them to do that,

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Speaker 1: and we can't force them to do things really ever.

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Speaker 1: Go back and listen to the Codependency episode, and I

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Speaker 1: think something else that is really helpful when we're talking

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Speaker 1: about so deeply personal things like this is to ask

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Speaker 1: for permission to talk about this, so to say, like, hey,

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Speaker 1: I've just had some questions and I've been wondering some

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Speaker 1: things about some of the stuff that I've noticed in

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Speaker 1: you when it comes to your mental health, and if

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Speaker 1: you know that they're taking medication, your medication, and I

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Speaker 1: want to see if you're open to having a conversation

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Speaker 1: about that. If they say no, respect that boundary. If

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Speaker 1: they say yes, then you can move forward. But this

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Speaker 1: is just something that can feel very intrusive, right, And

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Speaker 1: so if we're not coming to you with this stuff,

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Speaker 1: it is really important to make sure that that person

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Speaker 1: is open to hearing what you're saying, because one it

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Speaker 1: just might be hurtful or painful, or feel intrusive into

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Speaker 1: they might not be in a place where they can

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Speaker 1: take in the care that you might be offering because

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Speaker 1: of all of the variables. Right. So I hope this

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Speaker 1: was helpful. And as always, I know that I talk

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Speaker 1: about things very generally, but I do that because I

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Speaker 1: really care about you guys, and I care about the

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Speaker 1: people that are listening to this. And I don't want

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Speaker 1: anybody to take one piece of feedback or advice and

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Speaker 1: apply it to everybody in the world, because that is just,

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Speaker 1: you know, not possible, because we're also different and medication

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Speaker 1: is something that is a different story for every single

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Speaker 1: person in the world. What I would say overall is

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Speaker 1: what I wish wasn't a different story for everybody, was

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Speaker 1: the stigma around it. I want to just end with this.

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Speaker 1: I know we kind of started with this. Medication is

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Speaker 1: a gift. I believe it is something that I have

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Speaker 1: seen do so much good for so many people. Not

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Speaker 1: everybody needs it, but it doesn't mean that everybody should

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Speaker 1: not feel welcome and okay to try it under the

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Speaker 1: support of a licensed practitioner. So this is a very

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Speaker 1: touchy subject and I'm kind of tiptoeing around some things

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Speaker 1: and I feel myself doing that. So I'm gonna end

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Speaker 1: it here. And if you have more questions about medication,

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Speaker 1: whether it's about you or a friend or whoever, I

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Speaker 1: want to strongly, strongly suggest you reach out to a

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Speaker 1: professional because I cannot give any kind of one. I'm

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Speaker 1: not a doctor, but I can't give medical advice over

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Speaker 1: a podcast, nor what I want to. You guys deserve

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Speaker 1: specific care for your specific life, so I would encourage

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Speaker 1: that over everything. And as always, I love you guys.

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Speaker 1: I appreciate the wonder that you guys bring to me.

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Speaker 1: I love love reading your emails, I love reading your questions.

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Speaker 1: I love reading you guys. Trying to dig deeper into

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Speaker 1: your stories. It means a lot, and it really does

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Speaker 1: make recording these things very much worth it. So and closing,

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Speaker 1: go ahead, if you haven't already followed me on Instagram

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Speaker 1: at cat dot de Fatah and at You Need Therapy podcast.

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Speaker 1: And I look forward to talking to you guys again

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Speaker 1: on Monday. And I hope you have the week, the day,

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Speaker 1: the hour, the minute, the second that you need to have.

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Speaker 1: By guys,