Speaker 1: Okay, So there are major power plays going on on airplanes,
Speaker 1: and it's it's no wonder that we're so stressed out
Speaker 1: when we get off an airplane, because I don't really
Speaker 1: think it's necessarily the dehydration, the t s a, the challenges.
Speaker 1: Here's what I think. So I think I told the story.
Speaker 1: I told the story about when I got on the
Speaker 1: plane and the guy was like, well, we don't have room,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, well, I think we did. Did I
Speaker 1: told you guys? I did. Okay, So forgetting like the
Speaker 1: passive aggressive attitude oft of flight attendant's it's so weird.
Speaker 1: Sometimes it's it's a lottery. Sometimes they walk up and
Speaker 1: they're just so kind and everything's great. And sometimes you've
Speaker 1: gotten on the plane. You're the first person on the plane.
Speaker 1: You're sitting down. Um, we're gonna have to have you
Speaker 1: put your seat up, and I'm like, but wait a minute,
Speaker 1: there's three I we need to get our space ready
Speaker 1: right now. And I'm like, but like, you're not gonna
Speaker 1: start fighting with a flight attendant. But you're like my
Speaker 1: daughters sitting there, we've just gone on the plane. I'm
Speaker 1: letting her watch her iPad with the trade table down
Speaker 1: were the first people, and we're watching endless people coming
Speaker 1: on with all their ship and someone so passive aggressive,
Speaker 1: and you obviously can't say something. You just got to
Speaker 1: stifle it. So it's like you have a shot of
Speaker 1: getting a total fucking asshole or the nicest person you've
Speaker 1: ever met. So that's where it begins. Like someone that
Speaker 1: you ask for water in a certain oh, we don't
Speaker 1: give water with ice in it. Yeah, no, because of COVID,
Speaker 1: Like there's always some arbitrary, bizarre rule that is different
Speaker 1: than the rule of the time before, and you don't
Speaker 1: know if somebody's letting you slide, it's beyond okay. So
Speaker 1: now you're dealing with passive aggressive patrons. So I used
Speaker 1: to think it was just the person on the aisle
Speaker 1: who had all the power, because they sort of control
Speaker 1: the attitude of whether you're allowed to walk out to
Speaker 1: go to the bathroom, Like they decide whether you're going
Speaker 1: to give them a lap dance and climb over them
Speaker 1: and like crawl on top of them, or whether they're
Speaker 1: gonna stand up and give you the look because you
Speaker 1: had to pe twice because you're supposed to be hydrating,
Speaker 1: because you're on a fucking airplane which is dehydrating, and
Speaker 1: you've been fed salty nuts and oh goddamn bloody Mary.
Speaker 1: So you're supposed to be drinking tons of water. She's
Speaker 1: supposed to be peeing. But the person on the aisle
Speaker 1: did not sign up for that program. So they're sort
Speaker 1: of or like there's like a whole thing with like
Speaker 1: nudging them and all that. It's sort of like being
Speaker 1: at a Broadway play and like being the person who
Speaker 1: wants to get out, and the person on the aisle
Speaker 1: is like, you've exceeded the amount of times you're allowed
Speaker 1: to get out and pee or get popcorn. They have
Speaker 1: the power. That being said, I think the greater power
Speaker 1: on the plane is a person sitting in the window seat,
Speaker 1: because if that fucking sun is glaring in and you're
Speaker 1: that person on the aisle or across the aisle, now
Speaker 1: you're not even it's not even your own damn aisle.
Speaker 1: You're like, you've got your three people. You're in a
Speaker 1: little faction there in your pod. They're in your plane pod.
Speaker 1: You have to talk to them to get out, to
Speaker 1: get in. The person in the middle is just fucked sideways.
Speaker 1: I mean, let's be honest. They have to deal with
Speaker 1: the glaring sun coming in. They have to ask to
Speaker 1: be that's the real reason. It has nothing to do
Speaker 1: with people on top of them. That's that's that's not
Speaker 1: the worst of it. You are literally a prisoner. So
Speaker 1: now you're across the aisle or at the end, and
Speaker 1: you've gotta like look over. You don't know this person,
Speaker 1: They owe you nothing. They know the sun is glaring
Speaker 1: through that goddamn window. They're well aware they have some
Speaker 1: disorder where they must look at the sun at all
Speaker 1: times during a plane. Musty it takeoff, musty all the clouds,
Speaker 1: musty us go down. But you can't read a god'damn
Speaker 1: book or do anything because the sun is glaring in
Speaker 1: your eyes. So you're supposed to bring an eyemask, and
Speaker 1: I realized that, but sitting up normally with an eyemask,
Speaker 1: or just being living a normal life, like just eating
Speaker 1: a normal snack on the plane with that person. And
Speaker 1: sometimes you never go full monty. You never like, please
Speaker 1: close the goddamn whole window. And that's not some law
Speaker 1: that's been told to the airline. Slight his hand. It's like, no, yeah,
Speaker 1: they have to a the people behind me that are
Speaker 1: talking so loud, like there needs to be like a
Speaker 1: decibel counter. You're at a six, You've just reached a
Speaker 1: sucking eight. The flight his head and should be saying,
Speaker 1: shut your fucking pile. There are other people, but they're
Speaker 1: not allowed. There's no there's no like control of the
Speaker 1: noise on the plane. So someone's you know, someone's feast
Speaker 1: is your famine. Someone gonna be screaming like I am
Speaker 1: right now and think they're talking normally, and another person
Speaker 1: sleeping like that's just that's just death by a million
Speaker 1: paper cuts. So then you lean over the person in
Speaker 1: between you to ask a perfect stranger who's later gonna
Speaker 1: have to ask you if they can go to the
Speaker 1: bathroom by the way or climb over you give you
Speaker 1: a lap dance or whatever. And you're like, can you
Speaker 1: just close your window a little bit? And you say
Speaker 1: a little bit, and that passag twat does exactly that.
Speaker 1: They close it just a fucking little bit, you know,
Speaker 1: And then you want to make once you close your
Speaker 1: whole fucking window, because you see the light glaring into me,
Speaker 1: either Jesus has come from me or we're sucking flying
Speaker 1: in a goddamn sunstorm and I need to just like
Speaker 1: live my own normal life. My cranias, my corneas are burnt.
Speaker 1: So yeah, no power in the air, no matter who
Speaker 1: you are, Okay, no fucking power. So we're not all
Speaker 1: stressed out enough about the mask on, the mask off,
Speaker 1: the acne. You finally realize you're bad breath like after
Speaker 1: a couple of hours you're wearing a mask, like, wow,
Speaker 1: do I look? Is this what I always? I'm like
Speaker 1: because it's like it's now not great, But I wouldn't
Speaker 1: know that if I didn't have a mask on. Then
Speaker 1: you walk into a doctor's office, right, they're so you
Speaker 1: know you gotta have a mask and you must wear
Speaker 1: a mask on it all time, and they're militant and
Speaker 1: you can't move and you can't breathe and you can't
Speaker 1: do anything. Kind of a mint, can of a simple water,
Speaker 1: got of the mask on it all time. Then try
Speaker 1: to talk to them, try to do an administrative conversation,
Speaker 1: and they get annoyed too, like I didn't hear what
Speaker 1: is it? What it is? Because today I was saying, oh,
Speaker 1: my first emergency, burn it myrna, no burn it, skerna,
Speaker 1: it's burning with it with it be what like, oh
Speaker 1: my god, then you take to keep your mask, like
Speaker 1: we can't have a I don't know what to do?
Speaker 1: Are we doing? Like do we do on flash cards?
Speaker 1: What do you want to do? Bring a teleprompter. I
Speaker 1: don't know what to do anymore. I don't know what
Speaker 1: to do. I gotta bring a teleprompter to check it
Speaker 1: to a doctor now. So that's one thing. And also
Speaker 1: we have a new element now of people that want
Speaker 1: to get it because they haven't gotten it. So I
Speaker 1: know someone who was going to an event that they
Speaker 1: didn't want to a miss be funk up for everybody,
Speaker 1: and they were now in the They were now in
Speaker 1: the witching hour. We call that when you're a kid,
Speaker 1: like the witching hour. I think it was like between
Speaker 1: five and seven. Your kid's been up way too long.
Speaker 1: That kid passes out of five o'clock. You are fucked
Speaker 1: because they're not sleeping. So you have to like put
Speaker 1: little toothpicks in their eyes, keep them awake, like it's
Speaker 1: just you know, give them caffeine, like play jingle bells,
Speaker 1: like dance like a jester. It doesn't matter. It's a
Speaker 1: witching hour. Well, the witching hour is before you have
Speaker 1: a big event, you have a wedding coming up, you
Speaker 1: have whatever, it's just enough time to will make out
Speaker 1: with someone with COVID. There is a world that's not
Speaker 1: being discussed where people want to get it because they
Speaker 1: know that they're going to get it, and there are
Speaker 1: those last people that didn't get it, and they're afraid
Speaker 1: they're gonna, they're gonna they're gonna funk up someone's event
Speaker 1: or their own