Speaker 1: Nicky Glazer Podcast. Here's Nikki. Hello here, I am Hi, guys,
Speaker 1: Welcome to Nicki Glazer Podcast. It's Tuesday's episode. I'm so
Speaker 1: sorry that I wasn't around yesterday for an episode. You know,
Speaker 1: technical errors. I brought the wrong equipment to um l
Speaker 1: A and uh, I'm I'm in Los Angeles right now,
Speaker 1: and I grabbed what I thought was all the right
Speaker 1: equipment to make this happen, and it turned out I
Speaker 1: was missing a vital piece of the puzzle that makes
Speaker 1: this podcast sound good. And yeah, we just I just
Speaker 1: went back to bed instead. We got up and I
Speaker 1: texted Noah and texted I said a text message. I
Speaker 1: text messaged Noah and Andrew to be like, I forgot
Speaker 1: the I forgot the piece. I just packed so hastily
Speaker 1: and just in such a rush that sometimes my way
Speaker 1: of life it doesn't work out for me a lot
Speaker 1: of times it does. Like I feel like the way
Speaker 1: that I I don't spend like five hours packing for
Speaker 1: a trip like some people I know, And I'm saying
Speaker 1: that with disdain, but it's more like disdain for myself
Speaker 1: that I'm not as like organized. But I think some
Speaker 1: people spend like all day packing for a trip, and
Speaker 1: it's like why just takes like just throw some stuff
Speaker 1: in a suitcase. Like I know people that are like,
Speaker 1: I have to pack for this trip and they are
Speaker 1: like it's like they go, I gotta go home. I'm
Speaker 1: I'm leaving town on Monday, and I'm like it's Thursday.
Speaker 1: They're like, I have to start packing for this this trip,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, what do you need to do? Just
Speaker 1: put clothes in a thing and shut it. I know
Speaker 1: people know who buy new things for their trip. Um,
Speaker 1: we'll go shopping for clothes to where on the trip. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean that's I think that's what people do because
Speaker 1: on vacation, you're like a better version of the person
Speaker 1: you are outside of vacations, So you have to like,
Speaker 1: you know, you're gonna take a lot of pictures. You're
Speaker 1: gonna maybe see people that you don't normally see, so
Speaker 1: it has to be like you're just you know, you
Speaker 1: have to present this like better version of yourself. And
Speaker 1: it's fun to have like fresh vacation clothes for like
Speaker 1: a different climate. I think that's a lot of it. Um, yeah,
Speaker 1: I just don't understand just taking all like some people
Speaker 1: just are slower and I wish I were sometimes because
Speaker 1: things like this happen. But I also get a lot
Speaker 1: more done, I think, because I do pack like a
Speaker 1: banshee before leaving. Like I was just running around the
Speaker 1: house and our flight was at it was at ten. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was early. It was like nine o'clock, and so
Speaker 1: I had to get into an uber I said seven thirty.
Speaker 1: But that leaves me time to be late. So I
Speaker 1: just to be at the airport's forty five minutes. I
Speaker 1: check my bag forty five minutes before a flight because
Speaker 1: that's the cut off time for checking a bag, and
Speaker 1: if you miss that, you can't get on the flight
Speaker 1: because you've got to check a bag. So I always
Speaker 1: have to be there forty five minutes before, and I
Speaker 1: usually leave myself ten minutes of wiggle rooms. So I
Speaker 1: try to get there fifty five minutes before because I
Speaker 1: have status at all the airlines, so I can just
Speaker 1: get in the quick line, and if andrews with me,
Speaker 1: he can ask the person in front of me, like, hey,
Speaker 1: can we get in front. But like I never am.
Speaker 1: It's rare that I'm like, oh my god, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: like not make this flight. So but I always just
Speaker 1: wait to pack, Like I'm serious. If I'm leaving at
Speaker 1: seven thirty, so like my goal is seven thirty, that's
Speaker 1: really not gonna happen. It takes twenty minutes to get
Speaker 1: to the airport. That leaves me ten minute window before
Speaker 1: I have to um or no, it leaves me a
Speaker 1: twenty five minute window before my bags before I would
Speaker 1: miss my flight, which is a good window. And um,
Speaker 1: I probably start packing at let's see, I'm leaving at
Speaker 1: seven thirty. I wake up at six fifteen, and then
Speaker 1: I eat breakfast and that I'm just like I don't
Speaker 1: want to go pack, and then I probably start packing
Speaker 1: at like six and I'm just really dawdling because like
Speaker 1: I'm just like slow and it's the morning, and then
Speaker 1: I start looking at the clock and it's like seven
Speaker 1: o'clock and then I'm like, okay, a half hour, like
Speaker 1: that's fine. And then you start getting into toilet trees
Speaker 1: and that's where it slows me down and then um,
Speaker 1: and then it's the little things. It's just all like
Speaker 1: the chargers, Oh ship, I gotta bring my podcasting equipment
Speaker 1: and I did bring the right equipment. Is just max
Speaker 1: make chart like make their little ports systems differently, so
Speaker 1: that you have to buy all these attachments. I think
Speaker 1: that's the thing. You have to buy new chargers, and
Speaker 1: so I got screwed. And but I don't know that
Speaker 1: I would have picked the right one. Even if I
Speaker 1: packed the night before, I think I would have done
Speaker 1: the same thing. I have to say, I'm proud of
Speaker 1: you because you did something yesterday that I don't think
Speaker 1: you've done before. While I was working with you, you said,
Speaker 1: you said, you know what, I wouldn't mind taking the
Speaker 1: time off because we were talking about PEP going to
Speaker 1: get the cable. We're gonna do this whole work around.
Speaker 1: It was such a gift. Um, So I really appreciate
Speaker 1: the fans and uh and I heart and everyone allowing
Speaker 1: me to not have a podcast yesterday. It was freaking awesome. Um,
Speaker 1: even though you know, if I'm looking at my day,
Speaker 1: it would have been the one thing I would have
Speaker 1: liked to keep doing instead of all the other stuff
Speaker 1: I did. But I had to go get my hair
Speaker 1: done and that takes three hours and cost six hundred dollars.
Speaker 1: And I didn't even get a cut, no, just just
Speaker 1: a color. Three hours, six dollars, and that is before tip.
Speaker 1: It was five fifty before tip, and then I think
Speaker 1: I tipped, So what is that? I don't even want
Speaker 1: to do the math um? So uh yeah, I got
Speaker 1: my hair done. Feel accomplished about that, even though I'm
Speaker 1: having a little bit of stress about losing hair again,
Speaker 1: Like I don't know. Whenever I get my hair done,
Speaker 1: they do such a good job of blow drying it
Speaker 1: that it just feels so thin, Like it feels so
Speaker 1: straight and thin. It doesn't have any kind of like
Speaker 1: messiness to it that it just feels like a little
Speaker 1: Willie Nelson ponytail, Like its just the ponytail. My ponytail
Speaker 1: is just so sad and like a little biker dude,
Speaker 1: like sticking out of a helmet. I just I'm having
Speaker 1: a little bit of air anxiety. But I realized, like
Speaker 1: someone asked me yesterday, like do you register as tired? Ever?
Speaker 1: Like how does it register for you? Like what does
Speaker 1: that even feel like to you? And I was thinking
Speaker 1: that it doesn't really have I mean, I know right
Speaker 1: now I'm a little bit like good good because I
Speaker 1: haven't had caffeine. But that's that's me uncaffeinated. I'm not
Speaker 1: necessarily like I could go back to sleep right now,
Speaker 1: which I'm listening to this podcast about sleep that you
Speaker 1: know that guy that wrote um the Sleep book that
Speaker 1: everyone was talking about last year. I forget what it's
Speaker 1: called Why We Sleep? Yeah he did. He did a
Speaker 1: podcast with Sam Harris that I've been listening to. It's
Speaker 1: four hours long, but I have been crawling through it
Speaker 1: because it's packed with such great information and they say, like, yes,
Speaker 1: he says that. You know, people always asked me, how
Speaker 1: do you know if you're not getting good enough sleep?
Speaker 1: And it's the answer is if your alarm goes off
Speaker 1: and you could keep sleeping, that means you're not sleeping enough,
Speaker 1: like plain and simple. So I'm always tired if that's
Speaker 1: the answer. But who isn't I mean, who gets up?
Speaker 1: And it's like I think Kursen is the only person
Speaker 1: I know who gets up, And it's like I'm ready
Speaker 1: to get up. And my dad like they both just
Speaker 1: like like wake up naturally and like love. Like even
Speaker 1: if Carson had the ability to sleep, and she wouldn't
Speaker 1: need too because she like goes to bed at the
Speaker 1: right time and wakes up, it's just so admirable. I
Speaker 1: am Okay, it's yawned. Sorry, if that if you yawned
Speaker 1: with me, that means you're empathetic. But um, my dad
Speaker 1: told me recently that, well, I know that when dogs youn,
Speaker 1: it's not because they're tired, it's because they're happy and
Speaker 1: like excited, which is that's what I read from a
Speaker 1: Caesar Milan book. Oh my god, my cup matches, my
Speaker 1: wall matches my mic Oh my cankers are also back,
Speaker 1: and that always is a sign of life being a
Speaker 1: little bit more difficult. It really does put it like
Speaker 1: an overall damper on things when you have chronic mouth pain. Um,
Speaker 1: and I do, like, that's your your work. You use
Speaker 1: your mouth for work. Yeah, yes, so it's been painful.
Speaker 1: But um, I'm I'm getting ahead of them, so they're
Speaker 1: not going to get as bad as last time, I
Speaker 1: don't think, but they It does scare me. And it's
Speaker 1: just like a symptom of being tired and stressed. And
Speaker 1: I have to do that mantra Carlos gave me. I
Speaker 1: create joyful experiences for my loving world. I create joyful
Speaker 1: experiences for my loving world. I really do. But um,
Speaker 1: but my, but my friend asked me, how does tiredness
Speaker 1: register for you? Like, how do you know when you're tired.
Speaker 1: I know when babies are tired because they rub their eyes,
Speaker 1: you know, Like that's a sign that the babies or
Speaker 1: they get cranky. I think that's how I know. I
Speaker 1: just get I get depressed. I think I just I
Speaker 1: think my my energy reserves. Like the first thing my
Speaker 1: body does when it has energy is fight against my
Speaker 1: like low self esteem. Like it creates like a barrier
Speaker 1: of like that's the that's what I save all my
Speaker 1: energy to do. Is like even if I have a
Speaker 1: little bit, it's still like keeping me afloat of like
Speaker 1: you're good enough, and like I use that that's always
Speaker 1: like my baseline energy. So when I saptive energy, then
Speaker 1: I start using that energy that is being used to
Speaker 1: make me not depressed. And that's when I start Does
Speaker 1: that make sense? Like when I was antorexic, I started
Speaker 1: getting depressed Because the last place your goot body goes
Speaker 1: to for fat before it takes every other piece of
Speaker 1: fat is your brain. And so then your brain starts
Speaker 1: eating it. You start like eating your brain because there's
Speaker 1: fat in your brain. But obviously that's not the first
Speaker 1: place a body is gonna drain fat from. So like
Speaker 1: I think my last line of defense for energy is
Speaker 1: like not worrying about what my body looks like, not
Speaker 1: worrying about my hair, not worrying about other people or like.
Speaker 1: And then when I get tired, I start to just
Speaker 1: get like really sad, and I think that's I need
Speaker 1: to start. It was an interesting question because I hadn't
Speaker 1: thought about it, like, oh, what does tiredness to me
Speaker 1: feel like? I know it feels like, oh I want
Speaker 1: to bed, but what is it? I don't even know
Speaker 1: what that is? Um, what does tired just look like
Speaker 1: for you? For me, I get like brain fog, Like
Speaker 1: it's feels like inside of my skull is empty. Yes,
Speaker 1: no matter how much I searched for it, I just
Speaker 1: can't find a brain in there. Yes, that's it too.
Speaker 1: But that's interesting because when I get brain fog, I
Speaker 1: just think I'm stupid. I don't think I'm tired. I
Speaker 1: just think you're not funny. You never were. You don't
Speaker 1: deserve to be a comedian because a lot of times
Speaker 1: that happens to me when I'm working, you know, and
Speaker 1: I'm expected to be funny or entertaining, and I'm just
Speaker 1: so boring and can't think of anything and I just
Speaker 1: go to You're this is who you really are. You're
Speaker 1: like not funny, but it's just that's tiredness. Kersen said
Speaker 1: it on a group chat the other day of like
Speaker 1: like Nikki like brain like feeling dumb and feeling like
Speaker 1: not funny is like when she said something like when
Speaker 1: I'm tired, when she's tired, like her brain is just
Speaker 1: like du and I'm just like I did never think
Speaker 1: I never connected those things. It's so weird to be
Speaker 1: thirty seven and still learning like basic things about your
Speaker 1: body that like I was took it as like I'm dumb.
Speaker 1: I I like, that's who I really am and like
Speaker 1: and because I am so because my defenses are down
Speaker 1: for having like any because I'm dumb. I can't even
Speaker 1: reason that that is tired as I'm like, it's because
Speaker 1: I'm dumb, Like dumbness makes you think you're dumb? Does
Speaker 1: that make sense? Like instead of it's like, oh, I'm
Speaker 1: smart enough to know that this is tiredness, I'm too
Speaker 1: dumb to even know it. I don't know. I think
Speaker 1: it's um maybe self awareness. But it is interesting because
Speaker 1: I was just thinking about it this morning and I
Speaker 1: was reminding myself of what joy feels like, because you know,
Speaker 1: like I think something so important that I learned, um,
Speaker 1: is that our bodies have physical responses to our emotions
Speaker 1: and it's important to see Like what like if if
Speaker 1: you can just recognize what happens to your body when
Speaker 1: you're mad, when you're happy, when you're tired, you'll you'll
Speaker 1: get a better or understanding of yourself. Yes, about how
Speaker 1: your physical body feels. Checking in with your body when
Speaker 1: you feel those feelings. Um, yes, yeah, I feel like
Speaker 1: I'm so muted with my whole body. Like I never
Speaker 1: remember going to a somatic like therapist and she would
Speaker 1: be like, so, where what are you feeling right now?
Speaker 1: Like where is it in your body? And I was
Speaker 1: just like I don't even know what that means. I
Speaker 1: would just like make up. I'd be like my foot,
Speaker 1: I don't know, like because my body and would be
Speaker 1: hurting or something. I mean, I guess that's an answer,
Speaker 1: but like I never connect, Like right now, I really
Speaker 1: go for it, do it tired? And like I'm trying
Speaker 1: to think of where I'm feeling this tiredness. It's in
Speaker 1: my brain. Think about the the meditations that Sam Harris
Speaker 1: teaches and he also was was very helpful in teaching
Speaker 1: me that. And He's like, when you close your eyes,
Speaker 1: focus on the breathing, and that could be anywhere. For me,
Speaker 1: it was the tip of my nostrils, but it could
Speaker 1: be in your elbow, it could be your belly. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like wherever that is for you. Yeah, so it's if
Speaker 1: you if you can relate it to that, you might
Speaker 1: be able to help yourself out. Yeah. I'm just like
Speaker 1: what right now, even as we're talking, I'm like trying
Speaker 1: to figure out where I can nap today because my
Speaker 1: body is crying for like I'm a big morning nap person,
Speaker 1: and because I haven't a coffee yet because I'm saying
Speaker 1: it has airbnb that just has a coffee maker, but
Speaker 1: it doesn't. I forgot to get almond milk and I
Speaker 1: just don't want black coffee. I should just do it.
Speaker 1: But um maybe when I bring in Andrew, Well, Um,
Speaker 1: I am just my brain is trying to figure out
Speaker 1: when I can get a nap in. So I'm like, Okay,
Speaker 1: the people with cameras that follow me around, they're coming
Speaker 1: to here in like a half hour. Then we're supposed
Speaker 1: to start. Like I'm just like where can I maybe
Speaker 1: they can film me sleeping. I'm like, maybe we'll do
Speaker 1: a scene wearing nap. That's when I started negotiating. I'm
Speaker 1: just like, where am I gonna get it? This is
Speaker 1: why I don't have kids, because I will be a
Speaker 1: nappy mom like I will be, And I just get
Speaker 1: so scared that they're going to be like Mom's depressed,
Speaker 1: because like, I just want to nap sometimes I want.
Speaker 1: My best naps are when I have an hour and
Speaker 1: fifteen minutes. That's like a good nap. It'll take me
Speaker 1: like five minutes to get to sleep, and then that's
Speaker 1: a good one ten hour nap. Um. I haven't gotten
Speaker 1: to the part of the podcast where it talks about
Speaker 1: napping and like how what's the best way to do
Speaker 1: it and stuff, But I do know that once you
Speaker 1: are in that deep sleep, waking up out of that
Speaker 1: that can be torturous. So the best naps are twenty minutes.
Speaker 1: That's like what's been proven. Uh do you nap? Noah?
Speaker 1: Sometimes I do. Sometimes we'll do like a like a
Speaker 1: family cat nap because Buzzy, my cat, he always has
Speaker 1: like a certain time of day from like two to
Speaker 1: five thirty. He's like the sleepiest guy and it's just
Speaker 1: so much fun to just take a nap him. That's
Speaker 1: so cute. Oh my god, I want one today so bad.
Speaker 1: I don't know that I'm going to get it. A cat,
Speaker 1: A cat now. I like the idea of having a cat.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I that's just too much work. Like it's
Speaker 1: moments like these that I'm so tired and overwork that
Speaker 1: I'm like, no kids, no dogs, no more pets, no
Speaker 1: more responsibilities, no more jobs, no more things. Um, I like,
Speaker 1: And I've I've lost a lot of sleep when I'm
Speaker 1: going to bed recently because I've been like binging Taylor
Speaker 1: swift stuff because it's a very it's a very um
Speaker 1: important time right now in a Swifties life. The rerelease
Speaker 1: of Red came out, and I haven't put out a
Speaker 1: podcast since that's happened. Andrew has a lot of story
Speaker 1: about it that I'm I cannot wait to get your
Speaker 1: take on the White House thing. Nope, Well, I'm just
Speaker 1: I'm gonna try to guess. I won't try to guess.
Speaker 1: I mean, Jake, Jill and all stuff. Is it the
Speaker 1: scarf that they've located it close that Dione Warwick said
Speaker 1: that Jake Jillan Hall should give it back. There's a
Speaker 1: lot of stuff. I mean, like she is all over
Speaker 1: the news right now. Um, yeah, it's I mean, I
Speaker 1: am so into this her SNL performance. Did you see it? Noah?
Speaker 1: It was so good And I'm sure that anyone that's
Speaker 1: not a huge fan is like, boy, this was long,
Speaker 1: but to me it was like a perfect I could
Speaker 1: have gone longer. And she's just so cool and she
Speaker 1: was just so I just keep watching it. They're just
Speaker 1: moments that I just can't get over of her looking
Speaker 1: into the camera and just she seems so angry and
Speaker 1: so um it's just like, you know, I don't want
Speaker 1: to stay angry, but yeah, there's moments where you can
Speaker 1: tell she's still in it. I just wonder like how
Speaker 1: her X or how her boyfriend is handling her re
Speaker 1: visiting all these feelings about an X, because I feel like, oh,
Speaker 1: it feels very raw to me. How um the feeling
Speaker 1: she's accessing. And of course she's like a performer, so
Speaker 1: she's not like mad at s l L about Jake
Speaker 1: Gillen Hall. I've doubt that that's like she's actually mad,
Speaker 1: but she was able to sub in the same kind
Speaker 1: of like spite that she still has for him in
Speaker 1: that song. And the new lyrics are um so good,
Speaker 1: the new verses. I just didn't know what to expect
Speaker 1: from my favorite song All Too Well, having you know,
Speaker 1: five verse new verses in it, Like what would that
Speaker 1: would feel like? But it feels like a whole other
Speaker 1: song to me, And um, yeah, I performed All Too
Speaker 1: Well at um, a charity that like a fundraiser for
Speaker 1: the Wisconsin Democrats the other night that Benley, my friend
Speaker 1: put on in his house and it was broadcast and I, um,
Speaker 1: I didn't feel like doing comedy and I just wanted
Speaker 1: to sing Taylor Swift and I had just really like
Speaker 1: it was on Sunday. So it was just after that
Speaker 1: SML performance that I could not stop watching, and um,
Speaker 1: it was so fun to perform. And I the thing
Speaker 1: I do when I perform, though, is I start to
Speaker 1: increase the tempo so fast because I'm so worried everyone
Speaker 1: hates what I'm doing, so I just want to get
Speaker 1: it done quick. Because also that song is super longed.
Speaker 1: I didn't do the ten minute version one. I just
Speaker 1: did the five minute version one, but I probably made
Speaker 1: it two and a half minutes because I was so
Speaker 1: aware that everyone hates me. And I think that's why
Speaker 1: I talk fast on stage and in life, is because
Speaker 1: I know I'm so scared of how boring I might
Speaker 1: be that I don't want people to have to suffer
Speaker 1: that long. It's all a defense mechanism. Like everything I do,
Speaker 1: I realize is because yesterday someone was asking me, like,
Speaker 1: why do you wait till the last second to get
Speaker 1: pick out an outfit for the stage? Why do you
Speaker 1: wait till the last second before you pack? And it's
Speaker 1: because I don't want to When if I have free
Speaker 1: time that's filled with nothing I need, I'll i'll want
Speaker 1: to be unconscious for it, like I don't when I
Speaker 1: have free time, I'm in bed and trying to be
Speaker 1: unconscious because if I'm just awake, then I feel guilty
Speaker 1: that I'm not working on something I should be. There's
Speaker 1: never free time. That's like, I don't feel guilty except
Speaker 1: in the air when I'm flying. For some reason, I
Speaker 1: can just read a book and stuff. It feels like, oh,
Speaker 1: I don't need to get things done, even though yesterday
Speaker 1: or the other day I was yesterday. Two days ago,
Speaker 1: I was flying from New York to l a and
Speaker 1: there was a girl next to me on the flight
Speaker 1: and she was dressed so cute, and she had so
Speaker 1: much hair, and she was like on her laptop the
Speaker 1: entire time, like writing, and I was just like so
Speaker 1: jealous and like so annoyed, and I'm just listening to
Speaker 1: my white noise. That's like, and I have a sleep
Speaker 1: I'm using a tank top as a sleep mask. I
Speaker 1: look insane and curled up in a ball. And she's
Speaker 1: just like casually typing away, sipping on her Seltzer and
Speaker 1: I'm just like farting and using a scarf as a blanket,
Speaker 1: and like I have my shoes off and I'm putting up.
Speaker 1: I put a sawny bottle between my toes because my
Speaker 1: bunians were hurting and I needed, like I'm I was
Speaker 1: a nightmare. And this girl was just like tick tick tick.
Speaker 1: I'm Sarahista Parker, you know, Sex in the City, on
Speaker 1: her laptop writing a story. And I was so and
Speaker 1: she kept every time I woke up, I would look
Speaker 1: over and she was still typing. It was like, we
Speaker 1: get it. You have your life together, bitch. Um, Let's
Speaker 1: bring Andrew in here. Andrew, Hey, Andrew literally out of
Speaker 1: breath from a computer. Yeah, a lot of technical issues,
Speaker 1: like literally, I mean it's just I don't know. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we don't have to get into the specifics of C
Speaker 1: plus plus you know how I do when I start
Speaker 1: talking about computer. Yeah, I mean you are wearing I
Speaker 1: bet it's seventy three degrees in that apartment and you
Speaker 1: are wearing a sweater and undershirt and pants and drinking
Speaker 1: a hot coffee. Could that be why you're sweating too?
Speaker 1: I mean there's a combination of things, but uh, I
Speaker 1: think it's more to micro chips inside the radiator in there, yes,
Speaker 1: of the computer. Do you keep it a little bit
Speaker 1: hotter in that apartment? Like is it nice today? While gone, Well,
Speaker 1: I keep it at seventy I mean it's been chili here.
Speaker 1: So you know, there's that game of should I even
Speaker 1: use y a C or should I use real life?
Speaker 1: You know? But but yeah, no, we keep it around seventy.
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm reading this um alright. I was
Speaker 1: listening to that podcast about sleep and it says that UM,
Speaker 1: at night, to have good sleep, you need to be cold,
Speaker 1: like your body temperature needs to be cold at night.
Speaker 1: And then you know a lot of people use lights
Speaker 1: in the morning to like wake them up, like they
Speaker 1: have those alarm clocks that like the light turns brighter
Speaker 1: and then just just to wake up like it's the sun.
Speaker 1: But they found that people that don't use alarm clocks
Speaker 1: that live and sleep outside, you know, like indigenous peoples
Speaker 1: of the you know, people that live outside. Still, they've
Speaker 1: studied them, and they sleep past when the sun comes up.
Speaker 1: It has nothing to do with the sun. It's with
Speaker 1: the when it gets warm and so warmth wakes you up.
Speaker 1: So you're supposed to coldness puts you to sleep, and
Speaker 1: warmth wakes you up. So I mean to have it
Speaker 1: cold at night, Yes, I mean I would, I agree
Speaker 1: with you. I look, I give you the wind. However,
Speaker 1: there's been advancements where we could keep it warm and
Speaker 1: we don't even have to wake up because the saber
Speaker 1: tooth tiger isn't trying to eat us. Still our bodies
Speaker 1: like uh, still our reacting to the ways that we were,
Speaker 1: you know, meant to be. But it's it was interesting
Speaker 1: to hear that, like it is because everyone always thinks
Speaker 1: that has something to do with like the sun, but
Speaker 1: it or the light, which it doesn't. It's just the
Speaker 1: warmth of the fucking rooster. The rooster that crows. Everyone's like,
Speaker 1: that's what time you wake up to get the farm going,
Speaker 1: whatever the rooster wants. It's like, fuck you, rooster, You're
Speaker 1: not in charge of me. Uh you are? You? Are
Speaker 1: you calmed down? You're at Yeah, I'm better now. I'm
Speaker 1: still sweaty, still sweaty, um, I going. I'm good man.
Speaker 1: Things are great. Brenna's here, she's been here the last
Speaker 1: couple of days. We've had a really really good time,
Speaker 1: like just chilling, just fun, just fun time. When looked
Speaker 1: at different places and we uh, I don't know, just
Speaker 1: like when they apartments, Yeah, apartments. We're looking at different apartments,
Speaker 1: but very close by. I'm gonna be able to still
Speaker 1: throw rocks and Nikki, is that how the phrase is? Yeah,
Speaker 1: away tear a gunshot away building. I did, but I
Speaker 1: think we're gonna um, that's too close of a rock.
Speaker 1: I think. I think Clayton, I really really like and
Speaker 1: There and the Moon. It's like it's hard to do
Speaker 1: tomund It's hard to decide whether you want like a
Speaker 1: nice rustic place with more room, but you might have
Speaker 1: trouble with hot water or you might have, you know,
Speaker 1: just like little things as opposed to like a building
Speaker 1: like we're in currently, but there are a couple of
Speaker 1: buildings and Clayton where like, you know, it's like the
Speaker 1: New Age, Like it feels like a swanky hotel because
Speaker 1: it was at one point. No, there's a place called
Speaker 1: the two twelve and Clayton on the park um and
Speaker 1: it's just like it's fancy smancy, but it's it's you know,
Speaker 1: it's not that expensive. And uh and I don't know.
Speaker 1: I like Clayton a lot. It's a little bit more relaxed,
Speaker 1: even than clay You don't say Clayton Clayton clay like
Speaker 1: when you live in clean you know, it just it
Speaker 1: just rolls off the tongue down there. I did I
Speaker 1: hit some balls. I think we're gonna go play today.
Speaker 1: I think she might ride in the car. I always
Speaker 1: get worried that she won't be entertained enough to just ride.
Speaker 1: And would you want to ride in a cart while
Speaker 1: a guy plays golf. I could always be on my phone.
Speaker 1: Yeah it's true, and you're outside, Like, can't she just be?
Speaker 1: She could probably entertain herself alone. And as towns she
Speaker 1: used to live in, Like, I understand you want to
Speaker 1: spend time together, but like that's what I always like
Speaker 1: kind of butt up against when I'm on vacation with people.
Speaker 1: It's like or like seeing someone that you haven't seen
Speaker 1: a while, or visiting someone like you've spend every waking
Speaker 1: second with them, just because it's like, I still require
Speaker 1: alone time even when I have a three day like
Speaker 1: visit with someone, Like, oh, I feel like now, as
Speaker 1: an adult, I'm entitled to be like it's okay that
Speaker 1: I want to go spend some alone time even though
Speaker 1: I see this person once a year and this is
Speaker 1: the only time we get to spend together, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. But I think it's hard sometimes to
Speaker 1: do that. It is, and I think it would be fun.
Speaker 1: We did that yesterday. She did it. She had a
Speaker 1: job interview, and I went and hit golf balls against
Speaker 1: I got some alone time with a new employer. She
Speaker 1: couldn't that job interview. I think I would have ruined it.
Speaker 1: It's for um, like a spa facial place, and they
Speaker 1: probably look at my pores and be like, if you
Speaker 1: can't handle your own house, don't you handle he's do
Speaker 1: you heads? Which one asked Tashi, come on, try Itesetician right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: there you go. I couldn't spell it. You have so
Speaker 1: many blackheads. I don't know my skin. It's I don't
Speaker 1: really focus on it, you know, it's not it seems
Speaker 1: like you are focusing on it. I've never noticed you
Speaker 1: having blackheads. Who gets that close up to you except
Speaker 1: your lover, you know, like, who gets that close to
Speaker 1: me would see your black heads? I guess Luigi da does.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I just never see people's pores unless
Speaker 1: they're like really capers. Yeah, and do you like popping video?
Speaker 1: You do? Yeah? I don't want to. I don't like
Speaker 1: like wet pops. No, I don't. I'm not one of
Speaker 1: those girls that wants to like pop boyfriends pimples. But
Speaker 1: I know there's lots of girls out there that like
Speaker 1: to do that. I wish I were, because pimples are
Speaker 1: so much more prevalent than warts. But and and they're
Speaker 1: like that's almost acceptable now to be like, oh, it's
Speaker 1: cute when you guys when you like, you know, pick
Speaker 1: at each other's skin, But like, you know, when you
Speaker 1: take into your boyfriend's like I want to. I would
Speaker 1: love a boyfriend with planners warts, but it's hard to find.
Speaker 1: It's hard to find a good man with a virus
Speaker 1: taking over his foot. You like a dry wart, like
Speaker 1: I like a dry jerk. I don't even like videos
Speaker 1: of warts where it starts like bleed, even though that's
Speaker 1: that's when you know you got the you're down to
Speaker 1: the part where you can start treating it. Man, I
Speaker 1: still even think about the one that was on your fingers,
Speaker 1: And sometimes I look at your thumb and I'm like, God,
Speaker 1: damn it, can I will it back, just like can
Speaker 1: pick at it. I wanted to get into that thing
Speaker 1: so bad. I just never saw one so like blatantly.
Speaker 1: Like I used to have one on my thumb too,
Speaker 1: and I miss it so much. Sometimes I'm just like,
Speaker 1: please come back. I used to like wrap, so it
Speaker 1: was right here on my thumb, like on the edge
Speaker 1: of my thumb, and I used to um, I wanted
Speaker 1: to torture it. So I used to wrap my hair
Speaker 1: thing like you know, the little black hair thing that
Speaker 1: you used to type your hair. I used to wrap
Speaker 1: it around. It's so tight that it would like cut
Speaker 1: off its circulation. It would like torture it, like I
Speaker 1: just I don't know why I want to torture things.
Speaker 1: You you treat your own finger like it's in Guantanamo,
Speaker 1: would be like it was over and over for hours
Speaker 1: and hours. I just I'll tell you everything. Man, I
Speaker 1: don't tell you everything. I'll tell you I never I
Speaker 1: just want to like cut into it and like like
Speaker 1: Curson was the same way we used to torture bug
Speaker 1: bites by making exces in them with our with her
Speaker 1: thumbnail and like just making it suffer. She would put
Speaker 1: a curling iron on her bug bite, which is that's
Speaker 1: next level. But I do have some um like I
Speaker 1: don't know if anyone else gets this, but like my
Speaker 1: I'm starting to get like skin cracks on along my
Speaker 1: fingers and I'm getting some pretty good, uh hangnails that
Speaker 1: I want to pour like hot glue and then rub
Speaker 1: it up. Oh, oh satisfying. Yes. Do you have any
Speaker 1: videos that you watch on TikTok that you're like, oh satisfying? Yeah, Um,
Speaker 1: I mean I love a Kyle practor just getting down
Speaker 1: on someone's spine. The oh, I don't like those sounds.
Speaker 1: I don't like these. I mean just once I want
Speaker 1: the person to die and just be like then I'd
Speaker 1: probably get over the video, you know what I mean. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I just have just one crack and be like, whoops
Speaker 1: that the eight instead of the V four or whatever.
Speaker 1: They crack things so hard. I can't believe the human
Speaker 1: body can take so much. They do one where they
Speaker 1: tie a thing around the neck and they they pull
Speaker 1: your whole, like your head off and they're like, hey,
Speaker 1: you feel better, and everyone's like, I haven't felt that relief.
Speaker 1: And it's like, if these guys were really miracle workers,
Speaker 1: we would hear about it a lot more than we do.
Speaker 1: I don't believe that it actually does anything in the moment.
Speaker 1: I think it's almost like they're like those guys, those
Speaker 1: priests that are like shake people that are like Jesus
Speaker 1: compels you just stand and then the person's like and
Speaker 1: then I'm sure they walk out and they hurt again.
Speaker 1: It's like adrenaline can make pain go away. Like when
Speaker 1: I am on stage my bunyans are my feet hurt
Speaker 1: so bad in those shoes as soon as I walk
Speaker 1: off stage, but I don't feel it at all when
Speaker 1: I'm on stage. I'm on stage for an hour and
Speaker 1: a half and I don't feel any foot paint. And
Speaker 1: then the second stage it goes away. You think, if
Speaker 1: you're in a wheelchair, your legs haven't worked for thirty years.
Speaker 1: People are special. Those people are actors. But yes, I
Speaker 1: think that here so many people's disabilities by just granting
Speaker 1: them the ability to walk on stage and film special.
Speaker 1: Actually they would take the special away five minutes in
Speaker 1: because they gave it to him because they were handicapped.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. They'd be like, you know what, I
Speaker 1: didn't realize you're opener. Kind of only wanted you to
Speaker 1: have this when we thought you were. It's like the
Speaker 1: cancer guy on Ellen. Remember he had he had like
Speaker 1: stage fifteen cancer. Yeah, I think that's what you were referencing.
Speaker 1: He was a comedian that like wasn't didn't really have cancer.
Speaker 1: D you fake it? Or he had like a minor
Speaker 1: cancer and he like made it seem like major cancer. Okay, okay, well,
Speaker 1: I mean I guess there's no minor cancer, but you
Speaker 1: know he definitely uh said you have like eight months
Speaker 1: to live, and then he just kept living. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Uh yeah. I mean that's tricky because you don't want
Speaker 1: anyone to die. But when you think they are supposed
Speaker 1: to go and they keep going, you're like um, you're
Speaker 1: this isn't what the plan was. It is interesting when
Speaker 1: people go like, you know, he has terminal whatever, like
Speaker 1: he's gonna die someday, and it's like, so is everyone,
Speaker 1: Like don't we all? Aren't we all terminal? I mean
Speaker 1: we are. I mean some of us have a longer terminal.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I'm terminal right now. But you don't know.
Speaker 1: You could be walking across the street today and get
Speaker 1: hit by something that takes you out quicker than someone
Speaker 1: who has a terminal thing, not that I'm like, especially
Speaker 1: at a bus terminal. Yes, yes, good word play on
Speaker 1: on that. That is true. Hey you know what's happening here?
Speaker 1: Oh my god, good to hear you. Mom. What what
Speaker 1: did we get into the weekend? We were in Columbus,
Speaker 1: we were in Long Island. You put up all Yeah,
Speaker 1: I wanted to ask you about that Long Island clip.
Speaker 1: Why did that? I see that reposted this morning? Is
Speaker 1: it because the captions butchered what you were saying? I
Speaker 1: mean the captions? Yeah, it butchered. And then I have
Speaker 1: no idea. I don't want to go and write it
Speaker 1: in myself. I don't even care. But didn't you watch
Speaker 1: it to see that the caption didn't fit. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: I'm confused. Do you did watch and you were like,
Speaker 1: it doesn't matter people because people are gonna watch that
Speaker 1: without sound and be very confused. Don't you realize that
Speaker 1: people watch things without sound and that's what captains. I
Speaker 1: but I just want to know did you know when
Speaker 1: you posted that clip last night that the captions were wrong?
Speaker 1: Or did you not watch it? Fully? No, when I
Speaker 1: posted it last night, I saw it that the captions.
Speaker 1: I didn't know you could change the words and reels
Speaker 1: in Instagram. But did you know that the captions were
Speaker 1: wrong when you posted it? Or did you just because
Speaker 1: I figured? I figured it's close enough whatever? And then
Speaker 1: I was like, wait, why am I? It was so bad?
Speaker 1: It was so hot, I know, literally bad. It said
Speaker 1: you said Guantanamo and it said guantum or is it
Speaker 1: iguana or something? Which is pretty funny. You wait, you
Speaker 1: treat this like iguana. That's pretty funny. I was like
Speaker 1: so angry about it because I'm like, this is a
Speaker 1: funny bit and no one's gonna hear it because you're
Speaker 1: gonna read the captions to go, what the funk is
Speaker 1: this guy talking about? So then I reposted it today
Speaker 1: and I thought I fixed the captions, and then it
Speaker 1: just did the start of the captions, then stop captioning,
Speaker 1: and then started again at the end. I don't know
Speaker 1: it's a good bit. Richard Pryor didn't have captions. I
Speaker 1: don't need captions. You don't need captions. I should have
Speaker 1: just took the captains completely off, to be honest. You
Speaker 1: could also just pay someone twenty bucks to put captions
Speaker 1: on it for you, or do it yourself. It doesn't
Speaker 1: take that long. I know, well, I was gonna make
Speaker 1: it longer. It was gonna be a two minute bit
Speaker 1: and that would have been a lot of captions. But whatever,
Speaker 1: you know what it was the lesson here, don't trust
Speaker 1: the computer to caption for you when you already don't speak,
Speaker 1: you know, with that much dick dictation. You know, like
Speaker 1: you're already there. And it was like the sound isn't
Speaker 1: great on it. It's so funny that you trusted the
Speaker 1: computer to caption it. Four You're like, this is good enough.
Speaker 1: That is the difference between you and me. Man. Were
Speaker 1: you not getting enough likes on it or were people
Speaker 1: making fun of the captions? That's my question, Like I
Speaker 1: don't know people. No, no, people liked it. I just
Speaker 1: I honestly just posted it at like one in the morning.
Speaker 1: So there was a couple of things. Uh. One, the
Speaker 1: captions were horrendous and too I don't want to I
Speaker 1: know my brain. I would have stayed up till five
Speaker 1: in the morning to see if people liked it, even
Speaker 1: though they're all sleeping because it's cold in their room
Speaker 1: and everything's great for them or whatever. So that would
Speaker 1: have fucked with me. So I just took it down.
Speaker 1: I was like, I'll just do it tomorrow, and then
Speaker 1: I did the next day and did it wrong again.
Speaker 1: But I still stand by it's a fun bit. It's
Speaker 1: very really funny. It's really funny. Are you gonna be
Speaker 1: able to work it into your regular stand up and
Speaker 1: not do it when you're not in Long Island? I
Speaker 1: don't know, what do you think I think I could
Speaker 1: do like a you know, I was just in l A.
Speaker 1: I think I could be like, wow, it's very relaxed here.
Speaker 1: I was just in Long Island, and then I could
Speaker 1: But it just feels right with a Long Island crowd
Speaker 1: to just make fun that people in l A this
Speaker 1: weekend are going to have seen that bit on your
Speaker 1: social and then they're going to hear you do it
Speaker 1: again and be like, we just saw this. No why,
Speaker 1: I don't worry about at all? But why because first
Speaker 1: of all, I would say tops of people saw it, tops,
Speaker 1: I think, But okay, let's say you were you were
Speaker 1: you were doing your own show in l A and
Speaker 1: it was you, you would probably still do that bit.
Speaker 1: And I would say at that point, most of the
Speaker 1: people because if they follow you on Instagram, they're probably
Speaker 1: gonna go see you perform, so you don't care. Yeah,
Speaker 1: But why? I want to understand why, because I'm obsessed
Speaker 1: with like that. You know, in Chicago, there was a
Speaker 1: guy that was at the Meet and Green after the
Speaker 1: first show and he was like, I'm going to the
Speaker 1: second show, and I go, Okay, we'll have to do
Speaker 1: all new material for the second show because I don't
Speaker 1: want him to have to. You know, I didn't do
Speaker 1: all but I probably did like se new material because
Speaker 1: this one guy. I mean, that's why that's wild too,
Speaker 1: you know that. No, but that's wild because I'm but
Speaker 1: I'm doing like I just don't understand why how you
Speaker 1: can do material that you think that other people have
Speaker 1: seen that it's my material, I know, but like it's
Speaker 1: forty jokes that I've known almost my heart at that time,
Speaker 1: and I fucking loved every second of it. Now it's
Speaker 1: annoying when someone goes stairs are like they say his
Speaker 1: punchline for him that. But I guess I think I
Speaker 1: just look at new jokes as working hard and I
Speaker 1: don't want someone to think I'm lazy and I'm obsessed
Speaker 1: with that. It's like, I don't want people to be
Speaker 1: like I already heard this and then want their money back.
Speaker 1: Yeah I don't. I mean, look, if if that's the
Speaker 1: kind of person you are, don't come to my show. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but I'm very funny, but I'm just like, look, I
Speaker 1: don't because it's my If it was like if it
Speaker 1: was like a joke from a special, like seven years ago,
Speaker 1: then I'd be like, Okay, maybe it's time to change
Speaker 1: it up. But if I did it five days ago
Speaker 1: and I put it on the like Instagram, and if
Speaker 1: I do it seven years ago, I would bring it
Speaker 1: back because it's been so long that I don't remember.
Speaker 1: I don't remember anything from seven years ago, let alone
Speaker 1: a joke of a comedian I like, so I would
Speaker 1: be more willing to bring that back then, two ago,
Speaker 1: the day before, two years, but I would never post.
Speaker 1: That's why I don't post anything on Instagrams because I
Speaker 1: don't want people to see it and then come to
Speaker 1: my show and go, we already know this. Oh. I
Speaker 1: was thinking, that's why don't the same outfits again? Because
Speaker 1: I don't want people Everything has to be new, because
Speaker 1: I know psychologically that novelty equals people. People like novelty.
Speaker 1: People don't like things they've already seen, Like when you
Speaker 1: look at porn, you porn videos you've seen, you go
Speaker 1: to new things like men like novelty. New equals shiny
Speaker 1: and like people like it. People don't like the same
Speaker 1: when it comes to entertainment. Sometimes I don't I don't
Speaker 1: know if your outfit, I don't know if your outfit,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I mean it's different with guys because
Speaker 1: you know, like someone like George Carlin could wear a
Speaker 1: black T shirt and jeans every single special when no
Speaker 1: one would give a shit as long as the materials. Yes, um,
Speaker 1: I literally were to I'm wearing the same bomber jacket
Speaker 1: literally five shows in a row. So much easier to
Speaker 1: be you than it is me, and I'm jealous. I
Speaker 1: gotta learn how to be easier. No, but dude, there's
Speaker 1: things that I'm jealous of you. I mean, look, I
Speaker 1: look at it like, okay, Like take someone like Michael
Speaker 1: Cha right, Like he doesn't put any material. He would
Speaker 1: never put a joke up. Well, the reason why is
Speaker 1: one he gets to tell jokes every Saturday and he
Speaker 1: has a special where all his jokes will be seen
Speaker 1: by millions of people. If I had a special coming
Speaker 1: up and the person was like, hey, maybe don't put
Speaker 1: up you know, no one says person, it's you, you
Speaker 1: would still put it up if it's up to you.
Speaker 1: That's the difference telling me and Michael not to put
Speaker 1: up jokes. We are no, but you do have okay, okay, agreed.
Speaker 1: But if you told him okay, So take the people
Speaker 1: telling me if I had a special that was going
Speaker 1: to be filmed in a month, I wouldn't put my
Speaker 1: jokes up. I'd wait for the special to record. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but I don't even put up jokes from specials I've
Speaker 1: already taped. Well, that's what is what is wrong with me.
Speaker 1: I want to just let go and be able to
Speaker 1: just trust that Instagram will captain, Like, the difference between
Speaker 1: me and you is so vast, and I want to
Speaker 1: be more. I want to meet in the middle a
Speaker 1: little bit more, because I think that it would I
Speaker 1: would get more done if I just relaxed a little
Speaker 1: bit and didn't uh Like, I really almost lost my
Speaker 1: mind this weekend when it came to packing and stuff
Speaker 1: and like the difference and just resenting men and how
Speaker 1: they don't have to pack fucking anything and they don't
Speaker 1: have to worry about and everyone's always like, why are
Speaker 1: you Why do you check bags? I don't know, because
Speaker 1: I have fucking so many liquids to bring and men
Speaker 1: don't have any liquids, so many liquids to keep travel size.
Speaker 1: It's like, well, I'm going to be gone two weeks.
Speaker 1: I use so much conditioner, and I the conditioner I
Speaker 1: use is thirty dollars, and so I don't want to
Speaker 1: bring I can't buy it on the road. It's just
Speaker 1: like whatever, I'm just creating a reason to complain. Let's
Speaker 1: get to the news. Oh boy, it's Tuesday. You know
Speaker 1: what that means. It's Tuesday. I do apologize for not
Speaker 1: having a show yesterday, but we both got hit by
Speaker 1: cars separately. What happened, don't okay? I damn it. We
Speaker 1: weren't terminal, yesterday's terminal. Okay. Um, I hope you're having
Speaker 1: all the swells out there. It's gonna be a great
Speaker 1: week and we're gonna be in l A this weekend
Speaker 1: in San Diego, so that should be fun, all right.
Speaker 1: People are joking about Jake Jillen Hall handing the baton
Speaker 1: over to John Mayer after Taylor Swift dropped the All
Speaker 1: Too Well Short film fans thing Dear John is next thoughts,
Speaker 1: Dear John is next? Speak now? Um, it's just her
Speaker 1: uh third album is the next uh one she's going
Speaker 1: to re record based on you know, the hints she
Speaker 1: dropped in the All Too Well short film video. Um,
Speaker 1: that's what Swift these are thinking. And on speak now
Speaker 1: is Dear John, which is the scathing uh song about
Speaker 1: John Mayer and what she says. Um, I mean it's
Speaker 1: dear Well. Let me just look up some of the
Speaker 1: lyrics because I can never summon them from my own.
Speaker 1: But I don't passing the baton like did he did?
Speaker 1: Did he literally write something he hasn't addressed. Jake hasn't
Speaker 1: addressed anything yet I mean, he's so big of a
Speaker 1: star again, and goes back to like he doesn't need
Speaker 1: to address this now. If he was trying to get
Speaker 1: more followers or more like, he would troll back. But
Speaker 1: he's going to be in another movie where he's gonna
Speaker 1: make twenty million dollars and people are gonna stop talking
Speaker 1: about when they start talking about John Mayer. Like, also,
Speaker 1: he already went through it, man, he is going through
Speaker 1: it again the newly like he's swifties are taking over
Speaker 1: his accounts like he is. He's feeling it right now,
Speaker 1: like it's a little do you think he should? I
Speaker 1: don't think this is right. I don't think it's right
Speaker 1: to bully a guy for something that happened ten years
Speaker 1: ago and he didn't Taylor's what do you mean you
Speaker 1: don't know that, you have no idea what he did
Speaker 1: to her. And I also don't feel like we should
Speaker 1: punish anyone for literally anything, because I don't believe people
Speaker 1: can choose the way they act. But Taylor has a
Speaker 1: right to still have feelings about it and release new
Speaker 1: material about it, and she's every right. You have a
Speaker 1: right to get all in his his stuff and bully
Speaker 1: him and like harass him. No, I don't believe that.
Speaker 1: But that's just she can't control them. She's not like
Speaker 1: sicking them on him. She's just still piste off at
Speaker 1: him or she you know, she's re releasing her feelings
Speaker 1: that she had back then, and she's entitled to write
Speaker 1: a song about a guy that hurt her ten years ago.
Speaker 1: She has every right to tell me why she doesn't.
Speaker 1: You don't think you don't think that she has any
Speaker 1: control over fans in the regards of going, hey, maybe
Speaker 1: let's on harass it was it was a bad breakup,
Speaker 1: it was sad I lost a scarf, but it's not
Speaker 1: harassed the guy ten years later. I think she's been
Speaker 1: She's already said something like that to them. Of like
Speaker 1: the people I write songs about. It's she's she's put
Speaker 1: out a statement like that you can't control, Like this
Speaker 1: isn't like Travis Scott crowd control. She's not like, do
Speaker 1: whatever you can to get him back, Like she's not
Speaker 1: saying that. She's writing a song where she expresses her
Speaker 1: feelings and people like treat her like you know, she's
Speaker 1: their daughter, and they're like, you know, mad, and they
Speaker 1: want to defend her and they're they're kind of crazy,
Speaker 1: and but yes, I do believe that, like he's you know,
Speaker 1: as someone who has had and everyone's going it was
Speaker 1: only three months long. What are you so upset about?
Speaker 1: Like stop that, Stop that, because I I've been in
Speaker 1: things that were three weeks long that will stay with
Speaker 1: me for a lifetime. And it's not because I didn't
Speaker 1: get over the person, or because I didn't meet someone
Speaker 1: else that I love more than that person, or it's
Speaker 1: like sometimes things get unresolved and you still feelings about it,
Speaker 1: and like I I have. I I have been hurt
Speaker 1: by guys before, in the same way that Taylor Swift
Speaker 1: was based on everything I can glean from all too well,
Speaker 1: which is why I fucking love it so much. The
Speaker 1: new lyric uh, you were tossing me the car keys,
Speaker 1: fuck the patriarchy, key chain on the ground. You were
Speaker 1: always skipping town. And then this part she goes and
Speaker 1: we were, and I was thinking on the drive down
Speaker 1: anytime now he's gonna say it's love. He never called
Speaker 1: it what it was. I oh my god, waiting for
Speaker 1: a guy to say I love you, which is a
Speaker 1: separate issue, and then a guy never calling it what
Speaker 1: it was being like, we never dated. What are you
Speaker 1: talking about your We were like hanging out. It's like,
Speaker 1: shut up, like, don't tell me, Like there's I've been
Speaker 1: her before and I got it. I have no problem
Speaker 1: with like her writing lyrics and and being emotional and
Speaker 1: being upset. I just hate their harassments. I'm mad at
Speaker 1: the fans and look come after me it it might
Speaker 1: help my Uh you know, if any of you know
Speaker 1: how to do capture, I could really use to help.
Speaker 1: That'd be nice to you. But and what did you
Speaker 1: think of it? I thought it was great. I think
Speaker 1: Taylor Swift's fantastic, Like there's I don't have anything, doesn't
Speaker 1: need to reach a new octave. I was just asking
Speaker 1: for it. Actually, it wasn't a defensive thing of like
Speaker 1: I thought it was great, Like I'm absolutely like, what
Speaker 1: did you think of it? Oh? I I enjoyed it.
Speaker 1: I thought it felt like its own little movie on
Speaker 1: top of him. It was like a fan It was
Speaker 1: like one of your reaction videos to her own video
Speaker 1: about herself. I don't know, it was like one and
Speaker 1: the same. It was and it was interesting. It was
Speaker 1: it was um it changed like it felt like a
Speaker 1: story was being told like, I mean, she's an incredible storyteller,
Speaker 1: and um, I don't know. It just felt like it
Speaker 1: had like six different parts. The it's like the best
Speaker 1: time of my life. With this new rerelease. There's all
Speaker 1: these songs from the vault, which is like all the
Speaker 1: songs she wrote for this album that weren't released. The
Speaker 1: new song that get put out yesterday. The music video
Speaker 1: for it came out yesterday, is what I meant to say.
Speaker 1: Blake Lively directed it. It's called I I Bet You
Speaker 1: Think About Me and Chris Stapleton is on it. It
Speaker 1: is so good at the very end. And by the way,
Speaker 1: let's let's revisit the Dear John lyrics that are just
Speaker 1: I mean, she wrote this when she was nineteen, and
Speaker 1: she said, uh, you're an expert at sorry and keeping
Speaker 1: lines blurry. Never impressed by me acing your tests. All
Speaker 1: the girls that you've run dry have tired, lifeless eyes
Speaker 1: because you burn them out. Oh, and she goes, I
Speaker 1: see it all now that you're gone. Don't you think
Speaker 1: I was? She goes, Dear John, I see it all
Speaker 1: now that you're gone. Don't you think I was too
Speaker 1: young to be messed with the girl in the dress
Speaker 1: wrote you a song you should have known. You should
Speaker 1: have known. Don't you think I was too young? You
Speaker 1: should have known? Oh she's so much more like of
Speaker 1: all like to be nineteen and to tell someone, don't
Speaker 1: you think I was too young? And then all with
Speaker 1: the Jake jyllenhal thing saying like he so in the
Speaker 1: short film or I guess in the song she says
Speaker 1: like he says she's too young, and um, that's why
Speaker 1: they broke up, which is another thing that really bothers
Speaker 1: me that guys do when they break up with you,
Speaker 1: as they don't tell you the real reason. They just
Speaker 1: pick one that like you can't argue against. They'll use
Speaker 1: something against you for breaking up. And girls do this too.
Speaker 1: I don't this isn't just a guy issue, but like
Speaker 1: they'll say, you know, like we have to break up,
Speaker 1: like it's just if you were if you were older,
Speaker 1: it would work. Like they make a thing that you
Speaker 1: can't change so that there's no arguing of like but
Speaker 1: I'll get older for you, Like there's nothing you can say.
Speaker 1: That's you're you're put into a place where you have
Speaker 1: no it's it's it's and they think you're they're doing
Speaker 1: you a favor by picking something that is um out
Speaker 1: your fault, I guess. And then but then she goes
Speaker 1: on because I remember I heard that lyric and I
Speaker 1: didn't know where it was going. And then at the
Speaker 1: end she's like she calls bullshit because she goes you know,
Speaker 1: you always thought my jokes were corn She says, like
Speaker 1: the joke goes, I'm not good at telling jokes, but
Speaker 1: it goes, uh, you know, I stay the same age,
Speaker 1: and or like, no, I get older, you get older,
Speaker 1: and all your girlfriends stay my age. So it's like
Speaker 1: he the whole thing of you're too young wasn't even true.
Speaker 1: I remember when a guy said that we couldn't be together. Yes,
Speaker 1: but the same age. Remember that. I mean she even says,
Speaker 1: that's how the joke goes. So she's referencing that it's
Speaker 1: not like something she came up. Um yeah no, I uh.
Speaker 1: I think. Yeah, that's tough because if you can't, it's
Speaker 1: like you'd rather be told like, oh, actually no, it
Speaker 1: was your bad or not even you're bad, something you
Speaker 1: could control, something you could actually change, because then you
Speaker 1: could be better for the next person if you could
Speaker 1: have just dis honest, everyone's a liar, and it's it
Speaker 1: hurts to break up with people. I remember one guy
Speaker 1: told me, um, it's because I didn't want kids and
Speaker 1: he wanted kids, and he thought that was like yes,
Speaker 1: but it was really because he was talking to someone
Speaker 1: else at the time and he was interested in someone
Speaker 1: else and didn't like me because I had sex with
Speaker 1: him and he didn't like people that liked him back,
Speaker 1: like it was about that, but instead he was like,
Speaker 1: it's because you don't want kids, and I do. And
Speaker 1: I remember going, actually, I I don't know that I've
Speaker 1: ever said that. He's like, yes, you did. You did
Speaker 1: a joke about it. You said that, and I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: that was a joke and he's like, well um. And
Speaker 1: I was like, I'd be down to have kids. He's
Speaker 1: like okay, uh and then you go and I go, I,
Speaker 1: you know, I probably want to adopt. I don't want
Speaker 1: to have my own. He's like, oh, yeah, I want
Speaker 1: my own, Okay, yeah. I like just he's scrounging for anything.
Speaker 1: He was just like, oh, man, if you wanted your own,
Speaker 1: we could be together. I'm just like you would. It's
Speaker 1: because you're literally actively texting another girl right now. Don't
Speaker 1: act like this is about me not wanting kids, and
Speaker 1: I'm some like you know, I'm just And then that
Speaker 1: makes you feel when you're a woman that doesn't want
Speaker 1: kids and a guy has that reasoning, it makes sense
Speaker 1: if that's the actual reasoning, but if it doesn't, it
Speaker 1: just is like it's more rhetoric to make you feel
Speaker 1: like a like a bad woman that you don't want kids,
Speaker 1: like you're not complete. You could have shown him by
Speaker 1: having a kid as soon as possible, you know, like
Speaker 1: you just go downs so funny about getting back at someone,
Speaker 1: be like actually I'll show you having seven kids. And
Speaker 1: guys like, um, yeah, I don't want you. Girls do that,
Speaker 1: Like I always tell is say in my act that
Speaker 1: like when I tell girls don't sleep with guys before
Speaker 1: you get what you want in a relationship, they're like, um,
Speaker 1: you know, but I like having sex with them, like
Speaker 1: I And it's like, well, if you want him to
Speaker 1: be your boyfriend, and it's gonna be a lot harder
Speaker 1: if you have sex with them, it's just gonna be
Speaker 1: a lot harder. And they're like, okay, well I but
Speaker 1: I'll just have sex with other people. It's fine, And
Speaker 1: it's like, okay, what you'll do is and every girl
Speaker 1: has done this at some point. Is that you think
Speaker 1: you're gonna make the guy that you really like jealous
Speaker 1: by like making out with someone and then you accidentally
Speaker 1: tell them or you actually like you try to make
Speaker 1: them jealous, and guys don't respond to that by being
Speaker 1: like wait, I want you back, Like they go, okay,
Speaker 1: you're dot like we're done. That's you discussed me and
Speaker 1: now the girls like, but I only did it to
Speaker 1: get you back. It's like the thing you do to
Speaker 1: get them back makes them go. But we were talking
Speaker 1: like me and a Meal, we're talking. I don't think
Speaker 1: hepe mind me mentioned his name. Uh. The we were
Speaker 1: talking about how when you start as sex buddies, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, Like like the girls like, hey,
Speaker 1: I'll just we'll have sex. I'll take off at one am,
Speaker 1: and it's about like it's not for a guy sometimes,
Speaker 1: like sex is like almost secondary to like oh wait now,
Speaker 1: I like you can have sex with someone and hold
Speaker 1: back almost the intimacy and the guy might be very
Speaker 1: intrigued and that does happen to like that happened to
Speaker 1: both of us, where we're like, oh, oh, she just
Speaker 1: wants me for my sex, guys are feminine energy men feminine.
Speaker 1: It's only about ten percent of men that are feminine
Speaker 1: and probably going up all the time because of computers
Speaker 1: and people being in the middle hormones and milk. But
Speaker 1: it's true. Dr Pat Allen told me that male comics
Speaker 1: are are feminine energy, and so it makes sense that
Speaker 1: you guys feel like more bonded after sex. I believe
Speaker 1: officially I'm a masculine energy woman. Uh noah. I believe
Speaker 1: it's just the case because I have been able to
Speaker 1: I've been having um sex recently with someone who's not
Speaker 1: my boyfriend, and after sex, I am very happy to
Speaker 1: just be like by move on with my debt. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: yeah sex, that's a big change. Yeah. We should have
Speaker 1: best Sie. I've hinted at it last week because I
Speaker 1: said I took the morning after pill and I had
Speaker 1: a best sie this weekend. Come with me and go
Speaker 1: are you having vaginal sex? And I was like, girl,
Speaker 1: you heard right, And there's just started just taking it
Speaker 1: in the booper and now they're like, no, I still
Speaker 1: do that. Oh my god, are you kidding me? It's
Speaker 1: still I have not one time had raginal sex and
Speaker 1: not still done the other one because that's how much
Speaker 1: I love it. So just let let it be known
Speaker 1: that like, I do not like v more than a yes. Okay,
Speaker 1: I have a question though. Yes, the person you're having
Speaker 1: vaginal sex though has been frozen for a while. It's fine,
Speaker 1: but still yeah, if her voice comes out, then just
Speaker 1: you tell me what her question is. Okay, what's your question? Noah,
Speaker 1: My question is the person that you're having vaginal sex with.
Speaker 1: It's not just like a random It's not. It's not
Speaker 1: a one night stand. Yes, uh, it's Noah says. The
Speaker 1: difference is it's not a one night stand. It's it's
Speaker 1: something that's like regular. Um, yes, that's true. And it
Speaker 1: but and and it is someone that I like. I
Speaker 1: I already feel like, Um, I'm not scared that they're
Speaker 1: gonna like leave or abandon me or any of those things.
Speaker 1: What I will say and what I said to the
Speaker 1: best see this weekend that asked me because I did
Speaker 1: feel like a trader, a little bit like giving into
Speaker 1: the before I had the relationship that um, you know,
Speaker 1: before I had a boyfriend. The thing is, I don't
Speaker 1: want this person to be my boyfriend yet, so I'm
Speaker 1: not holding out for like something that I want. I
Speaker 1: I have a boundary up with uh this, this person
Speaker 1: and any guy that would be my boyfriend, and my
Speaker 1: boundary is not is definitely like I would do this
Speaker 1: at any point with anyone that I'm um having sex with.
Speaker 1: I waited. We've been hanging out for three months and
Speaker 1: have not had V right, so that to me was
Speaker 1: a long wait. And I also I'm the one that decided,
Speaker 1: like my new boundary is like I need to know
Speaker 1: that this person is like you know, working on themselves
Speaker 1: and like going to therapy, and that's my that's my
Speaker 1: That's another thing that's like you don't get to be
Speaker 1: my you. Not that they want me to be their
Speaker 1: girlfriend either. We're on the same page, but like we
Speaker 1: both have things of like I need to see something
Speaker 1: else before that. And to me, it's it's still not
Speaker 1: some V isn't something that I'm doing every time. It's
Speaker 1: special occasions. But I will say that like afterwards, I
Speaker 1: don't feel the need to be like, oh like hanging
Speaker 1: like like the other night, I was like, I think, uh,
Speaker 1: my partner is more of a basker and being like
Speaker 1: let's just lay like and talk about it because we're
Speaker 1: and when you know, in the past with this person,
Speaker 1: he was more of a like like, Okay, we're done,
Speaker 1: let's go, And now it's more of he's more of
Speaker 1: a basker and like wants to like connect afterwards, and
Speaker 1: I'm more of a like I want to go eat
Speaker 1: oatmeal on the couch and watch love on the spectrum
Speaker 1: and like he went to the bathroom like afterwards, and
Speaker 1: I like quickly got dressed and was like out on
Speaker 1: the couch like with my foot massager, and he walked
Speaker 1: out kind of like, wow, you're over this, and I
Speaker 1: was just like it's just like it wasn't like I
Speaker 1: was like not, I didn't enjoy it and didn't want
Speaker 1: to bask in it. But it's interesting, like as you
Speaker 1: get older, how those kind of roles can switch. Well,
Speaker 1: then do you feel like but your whole the whole
Speaker 1: thing was about how the V makes you more connected
Speaker 1: because you get addicted. You get addicted and then because
Speaker 1: you think a procreation because they're inside you like like
Speaker 1: so much more feelings happened. Like that was your hypothesis
Speaker 1: before Ian, So now your conclusion, No, but it is true.
Speaker 1: But what I but I already have what The thing is,
Speaker 1: you're not supposed to have v until you get what
Speaker 1: you want out of the relationship, and I have what
Speaker 1: I want out of that relationship. It's exactly the way
Speaker 1: I wanted to be, and so that's why I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm not like trying to get him to commit to
Speaker 1: me in any way that he's not like I'm getting.
Speaker 1: It's I'm getting everything I want and like we are
Speaker 1: we are the status exactly what I want to be?
Speaker 1: So what what am I dangling at this point? And
Speaker 1: um so that but I'm really glad I did it,
Speaker 1: and I told this to the bestie, is that it
Speaker 1: allowed me to like, I think that's why we're able
Speaker 1: to be so loving now is because I waited and
Speaker 1: like it. It really did create intimacy between us that
Speaker 1: uh wouldn't have been there if we were having sex
Speaker 1: from the get go. I really think that like leaving
Speaker 1: something off the table that led us to like yearn
Speaker 1: for each other in this way that we weren't allowed
Speaker 1: to was so hot. And I definitely think I will
Speaker 1: in my relationship go through periods where I'm like, no,
Speaker 1: we're cutting it off so that we miss it again
Speaker 1: and that we get to be kind of sexually frustrated
Speaker 1: in a way that makes us like like you know,
Speaker 1: high schoolers that can't hook up because we can't, you know,
Speaker 1: like Mormon more like Mormons are like, oh, like, I
Speaker 1: don't know what it was about not being able to
Speaker 1: have sex, just having that thing like that we both
Speaker 1: wanted so bad. It was like it made us like
Speaker 1: more crazy for each other. So I think I'll take
Speaker 1: it away at some point. Again, not not for me,
Speaker 1: but for us. Mm hmm, there's no if Oh go ahead, Sorry,
Speaker 1: I can't hear. No, no, no, there's no part of
Speaker 1: me what that like, I don't know, like part of
Speaker 1: me thinks like you do want the boyfriend though, like
Speaker 1: I don't know. I mean, look down, No, I really don't.
Speaker 1: I mean I do if he does a bunch of
Speaker 1: other stuff and like I feel good about it, but
Speaker 1: it has nothing to do with I have exactly what
Speaker 1: I want right now in this relationship. I would. I
Speaker 1: really do. And you're even questioning that. Huh. I'm shocked
Speaker 1: you're even questioning that. I don't feel like I just
Speaker 1: feel like sometimes like like I don't for me right, Like, okay,
Speaker 1: let's just say it was me in your position, or
Speaker 1: like if I was in that position, I feel like
Speaker 1: it's almost like a defense mechanism to go, hey, this
Speaker 1: is exactly what I want because I'm not getting the
Speaker 1: other thing that I could potentially want, so like almost protecting,
Speaker 1: like I'm settling, like oh no, I want this. No,
Speaker 1: my god, I'm not kidding you, dude. If he asked
Speaker 1: me to the girl friend today, I would say no.
Speaker 1: I would say no. And it's not because I don't
Speaker 1: want to be someday and I think he's potential. I
Speaker 1: just am not going to settle for anything except like
Speaker 1: exactly what I want in a relationship. And that doesn't
Speaker 1: mean that I'm miserable because he doesn't. I don't even
Speaker 1: want to boyfriend. I'm fine with the way things are.
Speaker 1: I really like I don't need more. I want more someday,
Speaker 1: but I don't want it right now. It's if that
Speaker 1: makes sense, like I'm not It's like a meal that
Speaker 1: I'm not hungry for right now. If like that makes sense,
Speaker 1: let's take a break and come back with why do
Speaker 1: I care? Why do I care? Why do I care?
Speaker 1: I think I'm going to throw up. A woman loses
Speaker 1: it when she realizes she has been brought on stage
Speaker 1: at a Dell's Comeback concert by her boyfriend for a
Speaker 1: surprise proposal. She said yes, and it's serenaded by yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean ah, yeah, I mean I was. I was
Speaker 1: confused why when she took off the blindfold, she was
Speaker 1: just like saying his name over and over and she
Speaker 1: wasn't like, what the hell is this? At one point
Speaker 1: she says, who are all these people? But I think
Speaker 1: she should have been saying that from like the get so,
Speaker 1: I don't know what and I don't know what precipitated.
Speaker 1: Everyone in the red was like, Adele is so amazing
Speaker 1: to do this. I'm like, Adele didn't do it. Adele
Speaker 1: didn't do it, you guys, Adele. It was not Adele's idea.
Speaker 1: Can I scream this at you when you see a
Speaker 1: bachelor take a woman on a date on the Bachelorette
Speaker 1: where there's a helicopter and there's candles and they walk
Speaker 1: out in some artists you never heard of singing a
Speaker 1: country song, but they both actually happening to know this guy.
Speaker 1: He didn't plan it. The producers said, Adele didn't plan that.
Speaker 1: Adele did it. Planet Okay, there's a lot of paperwork too. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's beautiful for her. Adele was like, I won't us
Speaker 1: to find a nice couple and then I'm going to
Speaker 1: serenade them with her favorite song. Like she was down
Speaker 1: to do it, but it wasn't like she's some like
Speaker 1: you know, uh, like people are acting like she is
Speaker 1: like working at a soup kitchen on her birthday, Like
Speaker 1: this is not she She's like I was reading the
Speaker 1: Reddit comments and I had to get out of there
Speaker 1: because people are like, she is just the most amazing
Speaker 1: person to do this, This is so thoughtful of her.
Speaker 1: Stop it, Stop it everyone? Will you please look at
Speaker 1: celebrity culture through a lens of everything they do is
Speaker 1: to make them look like good people. No one does
Speaker 1: anything and it's always producer's ideas. Everything everything is someone
Speaker 1: else's idea. Do you think Adele decided that and found
Speaker 1: that couple and found that girl thats been wanting him
Speaker 1: to a proposed rever and went out and bought the
Speaker 1: blindfold get out of town. How annoying is it to
Speaker 1: when someone does a public proposal like I hate it.
Speaker 1: I hate it puts too much pressure on the girl. Oh,
Speaker 1: I hate it. I think it's like hey, oh, you
Speaker 1: know she's gonna you know, she's gonna say yes. I
Speaker 1: mean sometimes and maybe if you're at a pers would
Speaker 1: not have organized this unless they fucking knew for sure.
Speaker 1: I wish no. I wish she said no. I wish
Speaker 1: she said fuck you, you don't want kids. She starts going,
Speaker 1: send my love to your new love, like adult just
Speaker 1: takes a breakup song to him because they know she's
Speaker 1: gonna say no. That would be cool. Oh it's the
Speaker 1: best when it's on a drumboat jumbo tron and the
Speaker 1: guy gets on his knee and the girl goes, what
Speaker 1: this is our third day and you didn't even buy
Speaker 1: the hot dog, you loser. I'm not no. I you know,
Speaker 1: I never understand when guys are like I'm nervous to propose.
Speaker 1: It's like, how do you know she's not? Like, of
Speaker 1: course you shouldn't be doing this. If you think there's
Speaker 1: any doubts your friends taking pictures, you know what's going
Speaker 1: to happen. You have a mariachi band that your dad's
Speaker 1: playing in, Like, stop it. Everyone knows. I just get
Speaker 1: so annoyed when people think that that celebrities are like
Speaker 1: these like Adele probably would do that. On her own time,
Speaker 1: like that probably is an idea that she'd come up
Speaker 1: with if she had any part in place, Like I
Speaker 1: know the people that produced this, and I'm going to
Speaker 1: actually get an ant, sir if Adele came up with
Speaker 1: this idea or not, because maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm wrong,
Speaker 1: but I definitely don't think I am. And the celebrities
Speaker 1: that were at that thing, did you guys watch it?
Speaker 1: Nine point nine million people watched us, by the way,
Speaker 1: I watched it. When I watched it, I was like,
Speaker 1: I feel like this is a little bit like the
Speaker 1: super Bowl. Like I feel like that many people are
Speaker 1: watching this right now. And I wasn't wrong. What is
Speaker 1: the super Bowl? What kind of numbers does that get?
Speaker 1: Probably around there? I bet I couldn't really, I think.
Speaker 1: I mean, I think at times as a super Bowl
Speaker 1: has been like maybe twenty million, but yeah, no, dude,
Speaker 1: it's nineties six million for the super Bowl. So of
Speaker 1: the super Bowl ain't bad. I mean, that's the best
Speaker 1: ratings that they could have ever wished for for that thing.
Speaker 1: That's a ton of people watching. Oh yeah, and then
Speaker 1: another hundred million will watch it on YouTube eventually. I'm sure.
Speaker 1: I I I asked, uh, the guy I'm seeing last
Speaker 1: the other night when Adele was on, I go, why
Speaker 1: don't I like her as much as I like Taylor Swift.
Speaker 1: She writes room music, she sings about men who have
Speaker 1: heard her. Why why is it? Why aren't I not?
Speaker 1: I want to be obsessed with her. I love Adele,
Speaker 1: I really do like a lot of our music, but
Speaker 1: it's not the same. And he goes because Adela is
Speaker 1: for women and Taylor Swift is for girls that are
Speaker 1: stuck in high school. And I go, ye, and not wrong.
Speaker 1: You're not wrong because and that's not that's not a
Speaker 1: slide against Taylor. I will I think Taylor is a
Speaker 1: better artist than Adele, and I'll fight anyone about it.
Speaker 1: But I do think that Taylor Swifts music is I
Speaker 1: am stuck in high school. The most dramatic things in
Speaker 1: my life happened in high school. You kind of get
Speaker 1: stuck whenever that happens. And I'm a little bit high schoolie.
Speaker 1: And that's why I like Adele. I haven't like matured
Speaker 1: enough to like her music in the same way. And
Speaker 1: let me just say, I'm probably an adult fan the
Speaker 1: way most women are adel fans. I just I'm a
Speaker 1: Taylor Swift fan the way no women are any kind
Speaker 1: of fan of anyone, because I'm a fan the way
Speaker 1: I am like I'm a high schooler in terms of
Speaker 1: the way I'm a fan probably middle school to be honest.
Speaker 1: Just like the the jackey with like one of the
Speaker 1: INSNC kids on the back, like that's where your level
Speaker 1: is that. I literally have a if you would go
Speaker 1: get a package for me at some point. I believe
Speaker 1: it's a sweater that says Taylor Swift on it that
Speaker 1: I bought from her her merch site, which her merches
Speaker 1: has a lot to be desired, but I gotta still
Speaker 1: get it. Okay, let's get to the reddit dump. This
Speaker 1: is your reddit doom. This is from ask reddit, the
Speaker 1: subreddit that is has interesting questions. It says, what is
Speaker 1: the worst smell that you've ever smelled in your life?
Speaker 1: I love this question? Can you know? Noah? Well, I
Speaker 1: don't know if Andrew will be able to hear me,
Speaker 1: but the worst is I absolutely believe I was coming
Speaker 1: home from Madison Square. I was coming home from Madison
Speaker 1: Square Garden after a Guns and Roses concert, and the
Speaker 1: subway stunks so much, and there was a man at
Speaker 1: the end of the subway and he was as stiff
Speaker 1: as a brick. And it smells. It was It's like
Speaker 1: it was like this like chemical smell. And I think
Speaker 1: that I smelled death. Yes, okay, Andrew, Noah smelled death
Speaker 1: once on a subway ride at the coming back from
Speaker 1: a Guns and Roses concert, and um, there was a
Speaker 1: man on the platform that was stiff as a board,
Speaker 1: and she it was a chemically smelled and she thinks
Speaker 1: she smelled the subway car in the subway car. And
Speaker 1: you're probably right, Noah, because I remember the Casey Anthony's story.
Speaker 1: I was watching it and Casey Anthony's dad is a
Speaker 1: was a homicide detective. When he went up he went
Speaker 1: to pick up the car that Casey Anthony had gotten
Speaker 1: toad that had had her daughter in the trunk um
Speaker 1: before she dumped her daughter allegedly. Um, actually she's proven innocent,
Speaker 1: but um, you know there and he was walking, they
Speaker 1: were walking, her and the mom. Him and the mother
Speaker 1: were walking to pick up the car and Casey Anthony
Speaker 1: had put a bunch of trash in the back of
Speaker 1: the trunk to mask the smell, because obviously she smells.
Speaker 1: She had driven around with her daughter in the trunk
Speaker 1: for like three days before she figured out what to
Speaker 1: do with her, and um, the the stent was so
Speaker 1: bad that she put trash in there, thinking it would
Speaker 1: like maskt or like people would be like, oh, that's
Speaker 1: just the trash smell, but she's her dad. The homicide
Speaker 1: detective said that when they were walking over to the
Speaker 1: junk yard to pick or like the you know, to
Speaker 1: a lot to get the car, they got within you know,
Speaker 1: like they got within proximity of it, and he goes,
Speaker 1: that smell is once you smell it, you know the
Speaker 1: smell and homicide detectives know. And he was like, that's
Speaker 1: the smell of death. And he just started like sobbing
Speaker 1: because they both knew that because that smell was coming
Speaker 1: from Casey's car, like their granddaughter was dead. And so
Speaker 1: it's like, once you smell that, you can never forget it.
Speaker 1: What about you, Andrew? Like an old subway meatball sandwich
Speaker 1: could probably be similar, but yeah, I just like the
Speaker 1: idea of like and then once you smell you know it,
Speaker 1: and it's just you would never her throw out the subway.
Speaker 1: You would never get rid of that, But I would
Speaker 1: get rid of it that baby, but a daughter, but
Speaker 1: your daughter who is like holding you back from entering
Speaker 1: wet t shirt contests. I mean, the Casey Anthony story
Speaker 1: is just seriously, she is such an idiot that it's
Speaker 1: almost there's nothing funny about it. But there are some
Speaker 1: things she does that are so insanely like just just
Speaker 1: the dumbest person ever thinking they're covering up a crime
Speaker 1: and actually getting away with it. It's so wild, just lucky.
Speaker 1: The worst smell I've ever smelled, I mean, that does
Speaker 1: remind me of thousands of times getting on the subway
Speaker 1: and realizing no one else is on that car and
Speaker 1: just smelling something that you can't even describe, and and
Speaker 1: everyone smells it and everyone runs out of But when
Speaker 1: I was on in Body Wars, I don't know if
Speaker 1: I told this story, but you know, a handicapped kid
Speaker 1: sat behind me when I was like eleven, and then
Speaker 1: he threw up all over my back during Body Wars,
Speaker 1: which is a ride at disney World or whatever Epcot,
Speaker 1: and I was like no. We were in the like
Speaker 1: in the liver section and of the body and I
Speaker 1: was like, man, this is really good stuff, Like like's
Speaker 1: they're really niling it. And uh, the lights came on
Speaker 1: and there would throw up all over me. And I
Speaker 1: just see the handicapped kid rubbing his face with puke
Speaker 1: all over him. And I had to buy a goofy
Speaker 1: shirt for like forty bucks. And I don't know, I
Speaker 1: just god, yeah, And I remember walking by the I
Speaker 1: swear to god, he looked at me like, yeah, who's
Speaker 1: goofy now, bitch, like like because we were making fun
Speaker 1: of him, because we were like like I could literally
Speaker 1: like he gave me a look like he like like
Speaker 1: almost that it was on purpose, which I respect it
Speaker 1: I do. Anyhow, what's your worst smell? I can't even
Speaker 1: recall what my worst smell is, to be honest with you,
Speaker 1: Like I nothing really stands out to me is like
Speaker 1: the worst. But I guess it's probably as something to
Speaker 1: do with um, I guess poop, like human feet, like
Speaker 1: smelling another person's human feces in New York in your
Speaker 1: front doorstep. Like that's just all obviously terrible. All of
Speaker 1: our stories are based in New York. But no, yeah, no,
Speaker 1: I think like I do. Think like you live in
Speaker 1: New York for four years, I'd tell you around a
Speaker 1: four year mark, you can tell the difference between dogshit
Speaker 1: and human shits, just based off a note. This is gross,
Speaker 1: but I've been on some diets before that produce really
Speaker 1: bad gas, like really bad gas. All right. Um, the
Speaker 1: people that shared stuff and Reddit's pretty much the same thing.
Speaker 1: They said the smell of There are all people that
Speaker 1: work in hospitals and our police officers that have smelled
Speaker 1: death or like hoarders apartments and things like that. Um.
Speaker 1: The next this is asked, women, what is the worst
Speaker 1: thing someone has ever said to you during sex? Um?
Speaker 1: What some of the answers are. A guy once shamed
Speaker 1: me for being too wet by saying my vagina was
Speaker 1: too gloopy. I put my clothes on and left and
Speaker 1: slugged out of there. Why does gloompy feel like it
Speaker 1: could be one of the seven dwarves? Gloopy gloopy is
Speaker 1: so funny? Um. Someone said, can you just stop? The
Speaker 1: noises you are making are killing the mood. I was
Speaker 1: having a great time up until that point. Uh. Someone
Speaker 1: said I can't. A guy said, I can't stay hard
Speaker 1: because you keep crying. I was crying because I didn't
Speaker 1: want to have sex. Whoof Jesus, that's gloopy? Someone said,
Speaker 1: if going to the gym isn't working, would you at
Speaker 1: least consider as implants to your body, would at least
Speaker 1: look somewhat proportional uses the word proportional during sex? That
Speaker 1: would take me out of the mood. Anything. Um, what's
Speaker 1: the worst thing you've ever heard during sex? Either one
Speaker 1: of you. I'm trying to think of mine, um ship,
Speaker 1: trying to think what has been like really bad? Uh.
Speaker 1: I don't think I've ever heard of one time. I
Speaker 1: mean I have I have the story of when a
Speaker 1: guy was choking me once and he didn't know what
Speaker 1: to say because he was just he was new to
Speaker 1: like choking a woman and I wanted it, and I
Speaker 1: have a joke in my it wasn't perfect, but he
Speaker 1: was kind of looking at me and I was kind
Speaker 1: of just like say something, and he just didn't know
Speaker 1: what to say, so he just like conjured what he like,
Speaker 1: you know, when you movies, maybe when you see someone
Speaker 1: choking someone, he just goes, I'm gonna kill you, just
Speaker 1: like noah, And he instantly was like, is that not good?
Speaker 1: I was like, no, no, no, that's not gonna be it. Well,
Speaker 1: when I called brand of Vibrant, apparently that wasn't the
Speaker 1: best dacious or vibrant. Vibrant is a color that doesn't
Speaker 1: mean like vivations can sometimes be like easy, Yeah it was.
Speaker 1: It was supposed to be like kind of tongue in cheek,
Speaker 1: but yeah, I think it was more I should just
Speaker 1: put my tongue in her cheek and shut the funk up.
Speaker 1: But I uh, yeah, I think like I'm trying to
Speaker 1: think what a girl saying. I mean, maybe like take no,
Speaker 1: I can't honestly, I got nothing. I think once I'm sucking,
Speaker 1: you could say anything and nothing's really gonna hurt me.
Speaker 1: I think, oh, this is a this is I want
Speaker 1: Brenna to try to say something weird to take you
Speaker 1: out of it. I'm wondering what could I'm sure, like,
Speaker 1: don't you I guess you're on viagrass, So there's nothing
Speaker 1: that's going to make you not hard, but maybe something
Speaker 1: that might make you hard and angry. Yeah. No, There's
Speaker 1: definitely been times I've lost my heart on where girls
Speaker 1: like like it's more like less what they say more
Speaker 1: about like how like not It's like there's no specific
Speaker 1: other than like a hair. Yeah, okay, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean, Like why are you not staying hard? Is
Speaker 1: it because of me? What's wrong with you? Like, what's
Speaker 1: wrong with this? Oh? My god? We would say that. Okay, no,
Speaker 1: let me not all le mean, I can't think of
Speaker 1: anything that was said to me, But I guess the
Speaker 1: worst thing is just absolutely quiet, when there's like no
Speaker 1: sound at all. Yes, that's a really good point, that
Speaker 1: like the void of of of of anything being said,
Speaker 1: when it's just like and you just hear gloopy sounds.
Speaker 1: Final thoughts. Um, let's get into Oh you know what,
Speaker 1: I'll share this one that no one's gonna fucking like
Speaker 1: but I loved it and it made um. This is
Speaker 1: in Vegan so trigger warning. Um. This is in the
Speaker 1: subredit Vegan. It says the first people to compare animal
Speaker 1: slaughter to the Holocaust, where actually Holocaust survivors says um uh.
Speaker 1: It says when vegans compare factory farming to the Holocaust,
Speaker 1: meat eaters freak out because we're quote comparing Jewish people
Speaker 1: to animals. Actually, the entire point is how the actions
Speaker 1: of all humans are similar to the actions of the
Speaker 1: Nazis and by standards who do nothing to help. But
Speaker 1: no one wants to think about that. And trying and
Speaker 1: trying to avoid the comparison. I literally just read an
Speaker 1: author complaining that an animal Holocaust meme was anti Semitic,
Speaker 1: Ignoring that, ignoring that the quote on the meme was
Speaker 1: by a Holocaust survivor, they went on to say that
Speaker 1: what we do to animals is not as bad because
Speaker 1: it has a purpose. Um. My question is this with
Speaker 1: the Holocaust and torture of Jewish people in Germany have
Speaker 1: been less bad if it had a quote unquote purpose.
Speaker 1: I mean, how could someone even suggest that? Who would
Speaker 1: even agree with that? Um? And then this person went
Speaker 1: on to find so many quotes from Holocaust survivors that
Speaker 1: are also animal rights advocates. Um uh, someone said in
Speaker 1: there this was um Isaac bash Avis Singer said, in
Speaker 1: their behavior towards creatures, all men are Nazis. Human beings
Speaker 1: see their own oppression vividly when they are the victims.
Speaker 1: Otherwise they victimized blindly and without a thought. Love that. Um.
Speaker 1: I spent my childhood years in the Warsaw Ghetto, where
Speaker 1: almost my entire family was murdered along with about thirty
Speaker 1: other Polish shoes. People sometimes will ask me whether that
Speaker 1: experience had anything to do with my work for animals.
Speaker 1: It didn't have a little to do with my work
Speaker 1: for animals. It had everything to do with my work
Speaker 1: for animals. And that's Alex her Shaft Farm, animal rights
Speaker 1: movement founder and Holocaust survivor. Um I thought that was
Speaker 1: interesting because I'm always reluctant to call it a genocide
Speaker 1: and like compare it to the Holocaust too, because I
Speaker 1: don't want people to be like, how can you compare
Speaker 1: animals to humans? But I don't know. I think it's
Speaker 1: I'm not saying it's if animals could talk, we wouldn't
Speaker 1: be doing what we're doing to them, is what I'm saying. Yeah. No,
Speaker 1: I mean I'm just like thinking about all the as
Speaker 1: to Jewish people. What do you guys think about this? Well,
Speaker 1: I think that I don't know. I think a lot
Speaker 1: of things get compared to the Holocaust and then it's
Speaker 1: like like like this part of the show no no, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: like this thought that's about to come out of my
Speaker 1: mouth is like the Holocaust because it's a tragedy. But
Speaker 1: um no, I think, like, I don't know, I just
Speaker 1: saw like fucking ten memes about anti vactor is putting
Speaker 1: on Jewish Golden Stars and comparing it to the Holocaust,
Speaker 1: and so I'm like, Okay, maybe we don't have to.
Speaker 1: I don't know if it's so much about like the
Speaker 1: comparison as opposed to just making the comparison, like can't
Speaker 1: the Holocaust just be its own horrible thing and without it?
Speaker 1: You know? I think that's where some people might be
Speaker 1: like annoyed, because I do think a lot of people go, oh,
Speaker 1: it's just like that, get that. But I feel like,
Speaker 1: but I think the analogy, it's it's I get it. Like,
Speaker 1: I think it's a way to get people on board
Speaker 1: because I think that the reason you use comparison is
Speaker 1: not to diminish something else or not or take away
Speaker 1: from the fact that it was one of the most
Speaker 1: horrific things that is imaginable. It's to make people understand that,
Speaker 1: how like there's something will wrap your minds around. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's not taking just by comparing using, but comparing you
Speaker 1: don't take away from something. I mean, like, yes, there
Speaker 1: are times when people go like, oh my god, that
Speaker 1: flight was like the nine eleven of my life, and
Speaker 1: it's just like, Okay, that's a uh that could be
Speaker 1: offensive to people because you're using it as like a
Speaker 1: joke and like you're obviously hyperbalizing, um using hyperpoly but
Speaker 1: I don't, I do. I really appreciated that. Um. And
Speaker 1: you know there's always some you know, I'm so there
Speaker 1: are many Holocaust survivors that would be like I would
Speaker 1: not compare it to that, so you know, they found Yeah.
Speaker 1: That was my other point, is like I wonder how
Speaker 1: I would feel of a Holocaust survivor was like yes, actually,
Speaker 1: and being an anti vaxer and people talking about people
Speaker 1: that won't get the vaccine is like the Holocaust and
Speaker 1: the guys like, yeah, dude, you were in it for
Speaker 1: like three days, like you weren't even like full hall.
Speaker 1: And at this point I'd be like, you're kind of
Speaker 1: you have dementia right now, because I mean, I think
Speaker 1: these codes about the animal rights were taken from like
Speaker 1: the eighties and stuff when we had more you know, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, cognitively with it Holocaust survivors. But I don't,
Speaker 1: I don't know. It was just an interesting thing that um.
Speaker 1: I obviously, uh, I have no right to say whether
Speaker 1: that's a right comparison or not, but um, but I
Speaker 1: just thought it was interesting. And that's the final thought.
Speaker 1: For the day and I have to go do a
Speaker 1: full day of stuff, so I'm gonna go. Their cameras
Speaker 1: zooming around me already, and um, I don't know why
Speaker 1: I can. Somebody broken in my house is filming me. Um, Andrew,
Speaker 1: I'll see you out here on tomorrow morning. I think
Speaker 1: you should just ask the people that have that information,
Speaker 1: because at some buried somewhere from me, there's someone who
Speaker 1: has that information for you. And it ain't gonna be me.
Speaker 1: It's not down your way. I know I couldn't do that,
Speaker 1: but I don't know. The road isn't listed on the house.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Just son, Andrew A Pinn
Speaker 1: That's true. I'm not even gonna do that. Uh, see
Speaker 1: you tomorrow morning. Thank you so much for listening. Uh,
Speaker 1: Donty can and shuff