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Speaker 1: Scrubbing In with Becca Tilly and Tanya Red and I

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Speaker 1: Heart Radio Podcast. Hello everybody, we are scrubbing in. As

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Speaker 1: you have probably seen on Instagram, Tanya is on a

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Speaker 1: romantic getaway to the Hamptons with Robbie and Sonny and

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Speaker 1: the children. So we had to bring in someone who

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Speaker 1: could hold her own on scrubbing in. Please welcome Joe

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Speaker 1: i'l Fletcher back. She's back. I like, I would see

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Speaker 1: your stories of you doing the hell stuff and I'd

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Speaker 1: be like, I don't know if I can ask her

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Speaker 1: to do this. She's so busy, And I was like,

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Speaker 1: you know it, just teld me no. If she can't

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Speaker 1: do it. You know, it's been touch and go today.

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Speaker 1: But I'm I'm here to support, here to feel in

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Speaker 1: some big shoes. Yeah, I saw the beam and I

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Speaker 1: almost responded because you said shattered and I was gonna

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Speaker 1: be like you and the beam, but that didn't feel

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Speaker 1: like the right time. So how are you You? You're

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Speaker 1: married to sawst time we talked to you, I think,

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Speaker 1: because well, I mean, you and I talked almost every

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Speaker 1: day on the past. She's married woman, what's like, have

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Speaker 1: there been any changes? Like husband, wifife, Honestly, we came

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Speaker 1: home to such chaos that I feel like we just

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Speaker 1: immediately jumped back into like just work mode. The honeymoon

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Speaker 1: was amazing. The wedding was like literally and I've told

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Speaker 1: you this back like it's the funnest It was the

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Speaker 1: funnest day of my life. So I feel good. I

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Speaker 1: had a great wedding, had a great honeymoon. But now

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Speaker 1: we're just like he's doing football season and I'm trying

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Speaker 1: to get this house done, and it's just you know,

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Speaker 1: back to normal, they must say old, but so basically

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Speaker 1: like the changes really because how long have we all

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Speaker 1: been together officially since the proposal? Six years was our

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Speaker 1: rehearsal dinner, Okay, six years? I mean yeah, so I

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Speaker 1: imagine aside from like switching um saying wife and husband

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Speaker 1: to from fiance, is is there anything like you've noticed?

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Speaker 1: You know, jord and I talked about this. For the

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Speaker 1: most part since we've we've lived together, we've like our

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Speaker 1: daily lives were intertwined since the day we got engaged.

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Speaker 1: But I will say one thing that I that we

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Speaker 1: both kind of felt was like, just after the wedding day,

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Speaker 1: you have this feeling. I mean, we had a feeling

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Speaker 1: of security, but it's a very kind of different feeling

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Speaker 1: of like no matter what, like this is my person

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Speaker 1: and you just kind of feel a little bit more.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to say we didn't have that before,

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Speaker 1: but you just do feel that different that safety. You

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Speaker 1: feel that like, I don't know, just more of a

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Speaker 1: stronger bond, I think. And it's nothing changed, but you

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Speaker 1: just feel like, Okay, we're in this together forever, which

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Speaker 1: is a cool feeling. Well, I've always thought that there

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Speaker 1: has to be something that shifts, like even if it's

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Speaker 1: so small, like even if it's not this like huge thing,

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Speaker 1: because everyone that like most people do it, you know,

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Speaker 1: like most people make that move after they've been together

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Speaker 1: for a long time. And it's like obviously you do

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Speaker 1: all the things that a married couple does, like you

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Speaker 1: live together, you work together. But um, in my mind,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, there has to be a something that that

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Speaker 1: changes when you when you switch over one said thing.

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Speaker 1: I can't even explain it, but it's like I remember,

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Speaker 1: like there are moments where like after the wedding would

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Speaker 1: be like do you feel any different, And it was

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Speaker 1: just kind of like just something feels different, like and

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Speaker 1: and I can't even tell you what that is, but yes,

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Speaker 1: that would that feeling, the unsaid feeling definitely shifts things.

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Speaker 1: But other than like daily life, I mean, nothing in

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Speaker 1: daily life has changed. So well, y'all went on like

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Speaker 1: a because y'all went on your honeymoon for like two

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Speaker 1: weeks and then you went on you went to Europe

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Speaker 1: for your brother Ben's wedding for how long was that?

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Speaker 1: Two weeks? Again two weeks. Y'all had a nice little

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Speaker 1: extensive vague after the wedding because the wedding leading up

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Speaker 1: to the wedding, I feel like you were not someone

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Speaker 1: I posted like a question box like questions for you,

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Speaker 1: and a lot of people are like bride Zilla moment,

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Speaker 1: and I was thinking, I don't think there was a

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Speaker 1: single moment where I felt like you were stressed or

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Speaker 1: Bride's like not stressed, but like obviously you had nerves

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Speaker 1: and excitement, but imber moment that I can think, go,

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Speaker 1: do you remember this the morning? No, I was totally good,

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Speaker 1: Like I felt like for two years of planning, I

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Speaker 1: was like, so just just chilling for somebody who's kind

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Speaker 1: of like a control freak when it comes to like

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Speaker 1: aspects of like things coming together. I thought it was

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Speaker 1: gonna be worse, but I was so chill. But I

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Speaker 1: remember there was one moment after we've been getting ready,

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Speaker 1: and you know, Becca, we had talked like we needed

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Speaker 1: it all be on time. My biggest thing was like

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Speaker 1: I just didn't want to like keep people waiting. I

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Speaker 1: didn't want to get off scheduled because we had to

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Speaker 1: be over with the wedding at ted BM because the

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Speaker 1: noise ordinance. So I just wanted to make sure everything

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Speaker 1: was like on time. And so a big part of

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Speaker 1: that was making sure like I was done getting ready,

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Speaker 1: you were you and the girls were done getting ready.

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Speaker 1: And I remember like right before we were about to

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Speaker 1: go out, I was already ready. They're putting on my

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Speaker 1: veil and I was walking forward and Catherine just stepped

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Speaker 1: on my veil and ripped it out of my hair,

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Speaker 1: and I was like, are you like one job? Says

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Speaker 1: my maid of honor. I couldn't even look her in

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Speaker 1: the eye because I was like, I'm gonna start laughing,

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Speaker 1: and this is not the time to laugh. Also, we

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Speaker 1: were in the middle of trying to film a TikTok,

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Speaker 1: because I was like, I it was like getting fodder

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Speaker 1: in the room. Yeah, but that's what Bride's all. I mean,

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Speaker 1: that was just like I would have reacted the exact

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Speaker 1: same as you know, someone stepped on my bed. Wasn't

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Speaker 1: Bride's all at all. But I literally sure, I was like,

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Speaker 1: just one job. It was just one job still, you know,

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Speaker 1: I was just joking with her. But that was the

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Speaker 1: only moment that I felt myself feel like really like

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Speaker 1: kind of anxious for a moment and I was like,

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Speaker 1: oh my god. But we got through it. We were good. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that was like maybe a ten seconds span of you

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Speaker 1: feeling that way, so you really got through a quick

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Speaker 1: I feel feel good about the bounce back. Yeah, the

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Speaker 1: bounce back was quick. I mean it went from just

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Speaker 1: like the death stair to Katherine and then we were

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Speaker 1: back in action. So it was just short lived. Um.

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Speaker 1: People are asking like, did you have anything? Because I agree,

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Speaker 1: it was like one of the most fun weekends. I

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Speaker 1: would love to go back and relive that weekend. It

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Speaker 1: was so much fun. I don't know that I say

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Speaker 1: that about many weddings that I've been a part of,

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Speaker 1: just because sometimes there is a lot of stress involved.

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Speaker 1: But it was just fun, Like your wedding planners killed it.

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Speaker 1: You didn't have I don't even think I think that's

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Speaker 1: why you were able to relax because they handled everything, yeah,

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Speaker 1: like honestly, and I'm this same way. I was nervous because,

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Speaker 1: like I remember in college, like the Catherine and I I

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Speaker 1: were in college that we tried to throw a party

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Speaker 1: at our house in college, and I could not enjoy

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Speaker 1: that party. Anytime they went up party, I was so stressed,

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Speaker 1: like the drugs were getting stinks, windows are breaking. That

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Speaker 1: was so panicked the whole time. Everyone's having fun and

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Speaker 1: I'm just like strapped. So I was like, I don't

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Speaker 1: want that to be on my wedding. And I feel

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Speaker 1: like that's kind of sometimes a common feeling, like you're

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Speaker 1: just worried that everything is gonna go right. I I

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Speaker 1: had so much fun, did not care if the seats

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Speaker 1: weren't right, didn't care if whatever didn't show up. I

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Speaker 1: was just like, I have my best friends, my family,

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Speaker 1: We waited two years to do this and we're finally

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Speaker 1: doing it, and I I couldn't even tell you if

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Speaker 1: something was wrong. Apparently our shuttle didn't show up on time.

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Speaker 1: You had no clue. Didn't really bother me when I

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Speaker 1: did find out. So yeah, I was shocked. It was

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Speaker 1: the greatest day of my life. You're like, sounds like

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Speaker 1: y'ast problem, sorry about that. Good I'm busy. Um I did.

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Speaker 1: There was a memory that I mean, there's a bunch

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Speaker 1: of memories that stick out. Well, first of all, I

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Speaker 1: will never forget when because the whole lead up to

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Speaker 1: the wedding, Jordan was like, I don't know if I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna cry, Like, I don't. I feel like there's so

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Speaker 1: much pressure for the groom to cry when he sees

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Speaker 1: the bride. And he was all, I don't. I don't

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Speaker 1: know if I'm gonna cry. I don't think so. And

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Speaker 1: then y'all did the first look and you came back

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Speaker 1: and you're like, Jordan cried, and yeah, I was like,

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Speaker 1: oh my gosh, that's so cute. So in my mind

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Speaker 1: I was like, Okay, he already saw her. Maybe he's

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Speaker 1: maybe he actually won't cry when she comes walking on

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Speaker 1: the wedding or the aisle. I was like, eyes locked

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Speaker 1: on him for the first few seconds. He immediately his

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Speaker 1: eyes got watery, and I was like, oh no, I

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Speaker 1: was not ready for this, because that's I know. It

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Speaker 1: was so sweet and maybe emotional because in our relationship,

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Speaker 1: like I'm the I'm the one, and I'm not a

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Speaker 1: very sensitive person, like I feel like for the most part.

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Speaker 1: I mean, you're one of my best friends, you can

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Speaker 1: tell me. But I compared to like a lot of people,

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Speaker 1: I don't feel very sensitive. Obviously, I cry and I

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Speaker 1: have emotion, like in our relationship, though I am by

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Speaker 1: far the more emotional one. And so I was like,

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Speaker 1: I know I'm gonna be sobbing him my wedding day,

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Speaker 1: like there's no question. And it was like a running

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Speaker 1: joke for two years, like Jordan was going to cry

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Speaker 1: on our wedding day, and the roles were reversed, like

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Speaker 1: I came down on our first look and he's like

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Speaker 1: cheering up, but I'm like laughing, and I don't know

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Speaker 1: if I'm like it's like nervous or like in shock

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Speaker 1: that he's crying. But I was like, it's called crisis laughter, Joel.

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Speaker 1: It was so weird. So it was it was very sweet.

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Speaker 1: I couldn't believe that he was getting emotional. It was

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Speaker 1: really really sweet. And then you're the other movement that

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Speaker 1: it really sticks out that really got me. As your

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Speaker 1: dad's speech, it was like I was not prepared for it.

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Speaker 1: I was sobbing during that. I don't know if you

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Speaker 1: guys could see that, but I was like ugly crying

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Speaker 1: during most of that dance. Yeah, oh during the dance

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Speaker 1: like my dad, Oh yeah, I couldn't tell you were crying.

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Speaker 1: But when he gave a speech, I was like, WHOA,

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Speaker 1: we were not ready. Um, do you have any like

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Speaker 1: if people are getting my earned or planning a wedding, like,

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Speaker 1: did you have anything that you did or didn't do

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Speaker 1: that you wish you had done or you wish you

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Speaker 1: didn't do. Um. Well, one thing that we made sure

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Speaker 1: of last minute that we didn't have an original plan

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Speaker 1: is when we had guests arriving, we weren't going to

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Speaker 1: serve any cocktails until cocktail hour. And it was kind

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Speaker 1: of like a last minute decision. I thought, like, I

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Speaker 1: thought it was a great decision to make sure we

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Speaker 1: had like wine or something cocktail wise for when guests

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Speaker 1: did arrived. I just felt like, it's it gives some

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Speaker 1: people something to do before the ceremony actually starts, because

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Speaker 1: it was a ceremony, then you go to cocktail hour,

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Speaker 1: then you go into the wedding. And I just felt

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Speaker 1: like if people are arriving, a lot of people sometimes

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Speaker 1: get there early because they just want to be safe.

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Speaker 1: They didn't want people standing around for an hour or

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Speaker 1: not having a cocktail to being a list. So that

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Speaker 1: was the last minute decision we made. But otherwise, I

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Speaker 1: honestly had the best wedding planner and my only piece

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Speaker 1: of advice because I didn't have to stress about anything.

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Speaker 1: Everything was like kind of done and executed so well.

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Speaker 1: And the only reason that happened is because of the

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Speaker 1: wedding planner. So even if you are the most detail oriented,

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Speaker 1: perfect like party planner person, if it's your day, I

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Speaker 1: one thousand percent recommends still getting a wedding planner because

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Speaker 1: I think it's worth the money, it's worth not having

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Speaker 1: to think and stress about things like it just makes

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Speaker 1: a world of a difference. So there was something else

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Speaker 1: that y'all did, and I have questioned if I made

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Speaker 1: this up in my head. Did y'all cut the cake

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Speaker 1: privately or like by yourselves? So we did a cake

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Speaker 1: cutting privately, yes, because we decided that we weren't going

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Speaker 1: to serve that cake. We were going to have the

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Speaker 1: cake for Jordan I and do a cake cutting ourselves.

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Speaker 1: But we're going to serve dessert made by our chef.

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Speaker 1: Got it, because I personally always feel like it's a

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Speaker 1: weird moment when they like make everyone come over and

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Speaker 1: watch the cake cutting. So in my mind, I was like,

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Speaker 1: I appreciate that they didn't make that a thing at

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Speaker 1: their wedding. Yeah, So that was the reason why we

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Speaker 1: were like, this doesn't need to be a whole thing.

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Speaker 1: We have like speeches, we want to get through. We

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Speaker 1: want to get straight to the party. So like, let's

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Speaker 1: not prolong like the party, I guess. So yeah, quick, easy,

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Speaker 1: gotta keep photos. Tried the cake and mash on Great.

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Speaker 1: That's all we needed was a good photo, maybe a

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Speaker 1: video clip of it. That's all we needed. Efficiency was

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Speaker 1: top of mine. I mean, that's the most Joe Joe

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Speaker 1: quality I've ever heard. Efficiency at our wedding. Um. And

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Speaker 1: then one other thing about the wedding, So Jojo and

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Speaker 1: I like at one point in the night we were like,

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Speaker 1: we gotta do a conga line, and so we started,

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Speaker 1: and we feel like everyone has joined like at one

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Speaker 1: point I've ever been a part of it, Like they've

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Speaker 1: never seen a bigger cong line, and I at one

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Speaker 1: like rolled my ankle and I was like, I gotta

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Speaker 1: keep going, like I felt it happened, but I was like,

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Speaker 1: I gotta keep going because there's too many people behind

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Speaker 1: me for me to dip out. So all night I

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Speaker 1: was like, that was the most epic moment we started.

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Speaker 1: We just also talked about the fact that we started

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Speaker 1: this Congo line and we picked up Jordan's who was

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Speaker 1: like smoking a cigar and it was such an epic

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Speaker 1: moment because he had the cigar in his mouth, he

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Speaker 1: like jumped into the Congo line. I was like, this

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Speaker 1: is the moment. This is the moment that's going to

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Speaker 1: go down in history. And Haley's behind me, Tanya's behind

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Speaker 1: like it was like we did it, like in our minds,

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Speaker 1: we did it. And then we got footage of the

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Speaker 1: Congo line and we were about eleven people deep. Okay

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Speaker 1: before the footage, I'm telling we're recapping it the next

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Speaker 1: day Haley and I and she goes, there weren't that

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Speaker 1: many people, and I was like, yeah, there were. I

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Speaker 1: was like, basically a whole party was on that line,

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Speaker 1: and She's like, no, there was maybe maybe ten people.

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Speaker 1: So then I'm telling Jojo and Jordan's chimes in it

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Speaker 1: goes yeah, like I don't think there was that many people,

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Speaker 1: So Joejo and are devastated and we're like, there's no way,

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Speaker 1: and then we did. To be fair, there was maybe

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Speaker 1: I think actually there was exactly fifteen people. Also, somehow

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Speaker 1: in the night, I could have been the congo line.

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Speaker 1: I think I broke my foot. Oh yeah, I think

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Speaker 1: that picture is all Bruce. I had no clue what

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Speaker 1: happened to me. That's the power of a good cog

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Speaker 1: and a good time. I do feel like I when

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Speaker 1: people are asking any regrets, I'm like, she hasn't said anything,

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Speaker 1: so I don't know what if there's an answer to

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Speaker 1: that question. But I did feel like the main advice

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Speaker 1: is like getting a wedding planner, a good one. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we did have a hiccup. We was just with their DJ.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if anyone remembers. Then again, I didn't

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Speaker 1: really care in the moment, but he like I literally

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Speaker 1: sent the DJ a full blown like playlist, Like he

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Speaker 1: really didn't have to do anything besides set up the equipment,

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Speaker 1: and like, em C M C right, I don't know

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Speaker 1: who they brought in from my wedding, but he had

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Speaker 1: no clue how to set up anything, like couldn't get

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Speaker 1: like the WiFi, and I'm like, for day of here,

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Speaker 1: we didn't we didn't test the equipment. UM, so that

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Speaker 1: was a little blit. But my wedding letter stepped in

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Speaker 1: and she was like, I'm djaying now. She got in

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Speaker 1: there and I don't know what she did, but she

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Speaker 1: got it working. So she handled it. She handled things

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Speaker 1: she did. But yeah, I don't even regrets. Yeah, it

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Speaker 1: was really fun. We should do like a yearly like

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Speaker 1: party to celebrate your anniversary. Well, I was thinking this, like,

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Speaker 1: you know, weddings are very expensive. I mean the way

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Speaker 1: we did it was expensive. It you know what, it

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Speaker 1: was worth it to us. But it's like a couple

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Speaker 1: of us all like every year, like we're just gonna

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Speaker 1: have a party. We're all gonna chip in and we're

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Speaker 1: just gonna have like when we get dressed up and

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Speaker 1: we have a bar and we just have a really

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Speaker 1: fun like celebration of friends. Would be so fun. I

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Speaker 1: am in full support of that. Um, how is the

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Speaker 1: house going? A lot of people asked, and I don't

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Speaker 1: want to stress you out, but I do think because

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Speaker 1: you're talking about it, it's important to ask what's like.

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Speaker 1: I don't think people realize that you and Jordan are

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Speaker 1: literally like on the property working, Like I don't You're

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Speaker 1: not just hiring I mean, obviously people doing specific jobs

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Speaker 1: that you can't do, but like y'all are very involved

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Speaker 1: in the process. Yes. So in we came to Puerto Rico,

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Speaker 1: my brothers or families, they've all lived here. We always

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Speaker 1: been vacation here. We loved it. We ended up finding

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Speaker 1: this house that was like for sale and at the time,

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Speaker 1: like the market was really good to buy, so we

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Speaker 1: bought and like, we're going to remodel his house and

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Speaker 1: this is gonna be our home here. That was We

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Speaker 1: are August two. It's been two years, um, and we

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Speaker 1: I think we still have a lot to go. Just

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Speaker 1: um when they say island time, it's it's island time.

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Speaker 1: Everything is harder logistically, materials, um. Just something just gonna

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Speaker 1: be able to show up has been difficult. But I

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Speaker 1: have heard that it's kind of the way that the

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Speaker 1: world has been for like the last two years. So

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Speaker 1: we're not the only ones. There's so many bigger problems

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Speaker 1: in the world, and that's the only thing that's kind

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Speaker 1: of kept me okay. It's like trying to put things

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Speaker 1: into perspective. But we've had I mean, I've done this,

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Speaker 1: I've remodeled so many different homes, and this by far

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Speaker 1: has tested me more than anything in my life. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I've never seen i mean some of the things that

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Speaker 1: you've posted. I'm like, I've never seen this version of

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Speaker 1: you because you're I have to brag on you, Like

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Speaker 1: I'll text Jojo and it'll be like just a dumb

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Speaker 1: like I'm struggling with blah blah blah. It'll be something

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Speaker 1: very dumb, like you know what, we just have to

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Speaker 1: be so grateful, Like there's so many problems. I'm always like,

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Speaker 1: thank you, Like I needed that perspective shift. So when

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Speaker 1: I've seen you have a moment, I'm like, it's dark

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Speaker 1: over there, well and you know what's going And I

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Speaker 1: feel like there's like a balance that I struggle with

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Speaker 1: on Instagram and social media, trying to be true to

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Speaker 1: how I'm feeling and sharing those moments while also not

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Speaker 1: trying to be negative and like complain. And so I

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Speaker 1: kind of struggle with that because I've had a lot

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Speaker 1: of moments that i haven't shared where I've been really

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Speaker 1: just kind of down and there's been a lot of

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Speaker 1: hardships that have come along with this project. Financially, every everything,

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Speaker 1: you know, it's um And so when I started to

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Speaker 1: share the struggles, obviously there's people that are like, you know,

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Speaker 1: get a grip on reality, this is whatever, And I

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00:19:00,040 --> 00:19:02,800
Speaker 1: at that, like I get that. So I'm careful with it.

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Speaker 1: But I also do think that it's important to, i mean,

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Speaker 1: make it known that not every day is perfect, because

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Speaker 1: every day I try to be positive and to share

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Speaker 1: that perspective. Um, but every day is great. But the

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00:19:15,840 --> 00:19:18,159
Speaker 1: great thing about that is there's always tomorrow. And I

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00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:20,320
Speaker 1: always try to check myself when things get tough. And

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Speaker 1: you and I do this with each other, like if

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Speaker 1: we're stressed, if we're having a hard time, it's like,

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Speaker 1: you know what, stay grateful. We are so blessed, We're

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Speaker 1: so lucky. We have healthy family, friends, a wonderful you know,

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Speaker 1: support system. So I think just learning to look at

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Speaker 1: the positive one positives, whatever that is. It doesn't have

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Speaker 1: to be in that situation. Just the positives in life,

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Speaker 1: honestly is what's kept me like feeling okay and good.

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Speaker 1: And it's just hard to train your mind. But I've

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Speaker 1: definitely been trying to do that more so I don't know,

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Speaker 1: but yes, you can struggle. I struggle sometimes with that mean,

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Speaker 1: like with the because I always am so hesitant to

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Speaker 1: share anything in the same way, like I don't ever

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Speaker 1: want to complain because I really don't have anything to

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Speaker 1: complain about. But when there is something that I'm struggling

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Speaker 1: with or I'm feeling a certain way, I don't think

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Speaker 1: me having a struggle or like vocalizing that struggle dismisses

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Speaker 1: the greater struggles going on in the world. It's just

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Speaker 1: like this one I'm going through. Maybe someone can relate

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Speaker 1: to it. But I always hate that expectation of like

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00:20:26,480 --> 00:20:28,280
Speaker 1: like the people who message you and they're like, get

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Speaker 1: a grip. It's like, obviously, you know that you're blessed,

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Speaker 1: you know that you have a lot you in the

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00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:35,000
Speaker 1: grand scheme of things. Sure, like it's gonna be fine,

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Speaker 1: But I don't. I hate the like it could be

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Speaker 1: worse somewhere. It can always be worse, Like we're always

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00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:43,320
Speaker 1: going to be like it could be worse than what's

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Speaker 1: going on. So it is a delicate balance. Um, I'm

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Speaker 1: just laughing because some of these questions are funny. Someone

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00:20:52,040 --> 00:20:54,800
Speaker 1: said oh, do you remember when you first saw not

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Speaker 1: about Haley and me and Haley. Yes, I remember exactly

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Speaker 1: when I found out. Okay, wait, we're going to take

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00:21:00,840 --> 00:21:18,880
Speaker 1: a break and we'll be right back. Okay, we're back,

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Speaker 1: so Jojo says she thinks she remembers when she first

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Speaker 1: saw out about Haley. Yeah, I do. I remember. I

401
00:21:24,560 --> 00:21:27,720
Speaker 1: was in the kitchen of the first home that Jordan

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Speaker 1: I ever moved into together in Dallas, and you called me,

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Speaker 1: and I think all you said was I made out

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Speaker 1: with a girl. Yeah. I kept it short and sweet,

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Speaker 1: with no context to that. There was just so I

406
00:21:41,640 --> 00:21:43,720
Speaker 1: made out with a girl last night or whenever. I

407
00:21:43,760 --> 00:21:46,000
Speaker 1: think it was like the night before lad that week

408
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Speaker 1: something like that. Do you real with I want to say,

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Speaker 1: I texted you probably either the day after or like

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00:21:53,119 --> 00:21:55,919
Speaker 1: it was. Yeah, I mean I called you. Sorry. I

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00:21:55,960 --> 00:21:57,560
Speaker 1: called you like a couple of days or a day

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00:21:57,600 --> 00:22:01,720
Speaker 1: after something. I was like, back up, like we need

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00:22:01,760 --> 00:22:03,479
Speaker 1: a little bit of context here. I was like, this

414
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:06,240
Speaker 1: is like we're having a fun night out you made

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Speaker 1: out with the chick, or this is like like like

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00:22:10,119 --> 00:22:14,359
Speaker 1: I need some context. I totally remember that. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: And so then you were like what and then I

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00:22:19,800 --> 00:22:23,920
Speaker 1: was like, yeah, I don't know, because this was also

419
00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:25,960
Speaker 1: right after you had gone on a date with somebody

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Speaker 1: that we I mean right, it was at the same time.

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Speaker 1: We've never I've never talked about it. I went on

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Speaker 1: a date, wasn't Yeah, a guy date with a guy

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00:22:35,680 --> 00:22:39,760
Speaker 1: that's very well known. Yeah, we both always thought it

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Speaker 1: was like cute and anyways, it was kind of a

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Speaker 1: big moment. So then she you hit me with the

426
00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:45,399
Speaker 1: second big thing, which was then you made out with

427
00:22:45,480 --> 00:22:47,960
Speaker 1: this girl, and I'm like, we need we need to

428
00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:50,400
Speaker 1: check in, like where are we at in life? What's happening?

429
00:22:52,119 --> 00:22:54,879
Speaker 1: Where are we at in life? Yeah? And then I

430
00:22:54,920 --> 00:22:57,399
Speaker 1: think I sent you a video of Haley dancing and

431
00:22:57,440 --> 00:23:03,000
Speaker 1: you're like, oh, I get it. I thought she was

432
00:23:03,119 --> 00:23:07,719
Speaker 1: so swagging. Yeah, I didn't. Watching that video over and

433
00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:11,639
Speaker 1: over and over again, I was like, it's like mesmerized.

434
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:16,639
Speaker 1: I UM. And then I will say, like everyone's always like,

435
00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:18,840
Speaker 1: what were your friends reactions? Like from that moment? You

436
00:23:18,880 --> 00:23:21,760
Speaker 1: never were like what are you doing? I will say

437
00:23:21,760 --> 00:23:23,760
Speaker 1: none of my friends really did that, but it was

438
00:23:23,800 --> 00:23:28,480
Speaker 1: just like cool, like and the thing about you, Becca

439
00:23:28,680 --> 00:23:32,439
Speaker 1: and like I I love you so much and like

440
00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:34,800
Speaker 1: all I want in Europe for you and your life

441
00:23:34,800 --> 00:23:36,879
Speaker 1: was to be happy and to find somebody, and like

442
00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:39,000
Speaker 1: we went through the journey of the Bachelor together, like

443
00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:40,480
Speaker 1: we're a big part of our at the beginning of

444
00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:43,240
Speaker 1: our relationship was trying to find that person, trying to

445
00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:45,879
Speaker 1: find love, trying to find and I know you struggled

446
00:23:45,960 --> 00:23:49,200
Speaker 1: with like you had dated, but like I always knew

447
00:23:49,200 --> 00:23:52,600
Speaker 1: that there was something always missing for you. And so

448
00:23:52,640 --> 00:23:54,520
Speaker 1: I remember when I heard this and the way that

449
00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:56,560
Speaker 1: you kind of talked about it, it immediately felt a

450
00:23:56,560 --> 00:23:59,240
Speaker 1: little different to me. Obviously we didn't know where it

451
00:23:59,280 --> 00:24:01,880
Speaker 1: was going to lead, but like I was just excited

452
00:24:01,920 --> 00:24:05,199
Speaker 1: that you were excited about somebody, because it takes you

453
00:24:05,320 --> 00:24:08,880
Speaker 1: a lot to be super excited about a relationship. And yeah,

454
00:24:08,920 --> 00:24:12,919
Speaker 1: it's very excited. Yeah, I know it was different. I

455
00:24:12,920 --> 00:24:15,720
Speaker 1: mean that was I think everyone knew it was different.

456
00:24:15,800 --> 00:24:19,120
Speaker 1: But yeah, I've been like having a really hard time

457
00:24:19,160 --> 00:24:21,280
Speaker 1: with Haley being gone. So I'm like overly emotional. So

458
00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:23,000
Speaker 1: I can't talk about it too much because I'll cry,

459
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:26,000
Speaker 1: but I've I've always been just so grateful for your

460
00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:28,639
Speaker 1: reaction and the way you talk about Haley. And also

461
00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:31,879
Speaker 1: one of my favorite things is how much Jordan and

462
00:24:31,920 --> 00:24:40,480
Speaker 1: Haley so happy. They're like buds and like at the wedding,

463
00:24:40,560 --> 00:24:43,120
Speaker 1: Haley and obviously I know you and Haley love each

464
00:24:43,119 --> 00:24:46,359
Speaker 1: other like Haley loves you. I know she asked about

465
00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:50,199
Speaker 1: Jordan a lot, and I'm like, I mean, she was

466
00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:53,320
Speaker 1: just like, wow, Well she's always like Jojo is so

467
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:56,840
Speaker 1: beautiful and she's so kind, and but she's at the wedding,

468
00:24:56,880 --> 00:24:59,800
Speaker 1: she's like Jordan's outfits. He just she like kept going

469
00:24:59,880 --> 00:25:03,000
Speaker 1: up to Jordan be like, I love you. Oh, I

470
00:25:03,040 --> 00:25:10,159
Speaker 1: love it. There each other, pype girls, hype men, hype man,

471
00:25:10,560 --> 00:25:15,760
Speaker 1: pipe bros. Um. So, yeah, that's I was curious because

472
00:25:15,960 --> 00:25:19,000
Speaker 1: since Hayley's gone right now, I feel like Jordan goes

473
00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:21,119
Speaker 1: out of like once football season starts, he's out of

474
00:25:21,160 --> 00:25:23,680
Speaker 1: town every one, like weekend or something every week. Yeah,

475
00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:26,880
Speaker 1: so he starts in two weeks. Do you ever get

476
00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:30,399
Speaker 1: like next week? Yeah? Do you strugg Like I guess

477
00:25:30,400 --> 00:25:33,240
Speaker 1: it's short increments of time. So it's like he's gone

478
00:25:33,280 --> 00:25:37,480
Speaker 1: and then he's back pretty soon. So it's not when

479
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:40,439
Speaker 1: we first got together like I struggled with it. It

480
00:25:40,640 --> 00:25:42,719
Speaker 1: was like I was like, how we supposed to like

481
00:25:43,359 --> 00:25:46,280
Speaker 1: figure out this relationship and again our first year, like

482
00:25:46,600 --> 00:25:49,479
Speaker 1: it was like the roller poster of emotions and so

483
00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:51,680
Speaker 1: but I remember the first year it was a really

484
00:25:51,680 --> 00:25:53,439
Speaker 1: big struggle for me because I was like, how can

485
00:25:53,480 --> 00:25:56,679
Speaker 1: we continue to like further this relationship and understand each

486
00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:58,159
Speaker 1: other and to know each other and work through problems

487
00:25:58,240 --> 00:26:00,680
Speaker 1: or issues that we're having if like you're gone every

488
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:02,800
Speaker 1: weekend and that's a big chunks, Like I like really

489
00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:06,560
Speaker 1: overthought it um and then I had to realize, like

490
00:26:06,600 --> 00:26:09,720
Speaker 1: this is his career, like this is his life, his livelihood,

491
00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:13,200
Speaker 1: and I'm supposed to be that support system, like you

492
00:26:13,200 --> 00:26:17,240
Speaker 1: you can't have your significant other or your partner create

493
00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:20,440
Speaker 1: more stress by just being like That's how I looked

494
00:26:20,480 --> 00:26:22,080
Speaker 1: at it, Like I'm supposed to be supportive of him.

495
00:26:22,080 --> 00:26:23,880
Speaker 1: I'm supposed to make sure that when he's on the road,

496
00:26:23,960 --> 00:26:26,439
Speaker 1: like he's like I can, I got my wife at

497
00:26:26,440 --> 00:26:28,280
Speaker 1: home or my girlfriend or whoever I am at the

498
00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:32,720
Speaker 1: time fiance at this time at home parting me encouraging

499
00:26:32,760 --> 00:26:36,040
Speaker 1: me to like go chase my dream. And so after

500
00:26:36,080 --> 00:26:38,240
Speaker 1: that first year in understanding and like kind of training

501
00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:41,040
Speaker 1: like this is what am I doing? Me complaining about

502
00:26:41,040 --> 00:26:43,159
Speaker 1: this all the time, it's like only hurting him, and

503
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:46,200
Speaker 1: it's hurting our relationship. But it was really hard in

504
00:26:46,240 --> 00:26:49,080
Speaker 1: the beginning, and now it's kind of like it's our rhythm.

505
00:26:49,400 --> 00:26:53,760
Speaker 1: Like six months of the year we're together seven, work together,

506
00:26:53,880 --> 00:26:57,040
Speaker 1: live together, do everything together. So this is just and

507
00:26:57,080 --> 00:27:01,640
Speaker 1: he's only gone for like Thursday to Sunday. You really, Yeah,

508
00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:04,119
Speaker 1: but I think the situation is different, Yeah, but I

509
00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:07,679
Speaker 1: need it is different. However, I did need that. I

510
00:27:07,720 --> 00:27:12,240
Speaker 1: needed that shift right there. I think what happened is

511
00:27:12,320 --> 00:27:15,600
Speaker 1: like when we first met, she went on tour, so

512
00:27:15,640 --> 00:27:17,439
Speaker 1: like that was all we knew in the beginning was

513
00:27:17,520 --> 00:27:19,520
Speaker 1: like her being gone, and it was I mean, it

514
00:27:19,560 --> 00:27:21,719
Speaker 1: was hard because we were like falling in love and

515
00:27:21,760 --> 00:27:25,919
Speaker 1: also like not physically together. And then and then we

516
00:27:26,000 --> 00:27:28,120
Speaker 1: had like the pandemic in these couple of years where

517
00:27:28,119 --> 00:27:33,440
Speaker 1: it's been like four seven time together and now we're

518
00:27:33,480 --> 00:27:35,200
Speaker 1: you know, she's gone again. And I thought it would

519
00:27:35,240 --> 00:27:37,159
Speaker 1: be easier because I'm like, we've done this before, but

520
00:27:37,440 --> 00:27:40,119
Speaker 1: I am having like a really hard time and she's

521
00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:42,840
Speaker 1: navigating it like way better than I am. Of course

522
00:27:42,840 --> 00:27:45,440
Speaker 1: I'm the one who's like at home alone. But yeah,

523
00:27:45,840 --> 00:27:47,879
Speaker 1: I think the pandemic probably did that to a lot

524
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:51,639
Speaker 1: of people because people got so used to being with

525
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:54,360
Speaker 1: each other every single day, and then you hear about

526
00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:58,120
Speaker 1: how the pandemic either like strength and relationships or broke them, um,

527
00:27:58,160 --> 00:28:00,200
Speaker 1: And so people got so comfortable being with each other

528
00:28:00,240 --> 00:28:02,679
Speaker 1: every single day. And that's why though, like when the

529
00:28:02,720 --> 00:28:06,199
Speaker 1: pandemic happened, like it wasn't really different for Jordan, I

530
00:28:06,240 --> 00:28:08,680
Speaker 1: because on off season we were like that every single

531
00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:11,919
Speaker 1: day anyway half the year. But I do think the

532
00:28:11,920 --> 00:28:14,720
Speaker 1: biggest thing is, like when is just making sure you're

533
00:28:14,760 --> 00:28:17,399
Speaker 1: that support system because obviously, like Haley is missing you

534
00:28:17,480 --> 00:28:20,320
Speaker 1: just as much as you are, right like you said,

535
00:28:20,320 --> 00:28:24,200
Speaker 1: you're home, you're alone, she's busy. Um, They're just making

536
00:28:24,240 --> 00:28:26,080
Speaker 1: sure and I do this for Jordan and try to

537
00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:28,000
Speaker 1: It's like, you know what, I can be sad, I

538
00:28:28,040 --> 00:28:29,760
Speaker 1: can miss them, but like make sure that they know that,

539
00:28:29,840 --> 00:28:32,960
Speaker 1: like you're proud of them, that you're excited for them,

540
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:34,760
Speaker 1: so that they can go on and like do what

541
00:28:34,800 --> 00:28:38,560
Speaker 1: they do. So I needed that and I'm gonna pass

542
00:28:38,680 --> 00:28:43,040
Speaker 1: that along to Hayley and say, Joe, Joe gave me

543
00:28:43,080 --> 00:28:46,840
Speaker 1: a perspective ship. I also know I'm seeing her this week,

544
00:28:46,880 --> 00:28:48,880
Speaker 1: so I think I'm on, Like I'm on like an

545
00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:54,320
Speaker 1: upward trajectory where I've been downward lately. But you know,

546
00:28:54,480 --> 00:28:56,120
Speaker 1: I just can I tell you to be honest. When

547
00:28:56,120 --> 00:28:57,960
Speaker 1: I would in the very beginning, when I would like

548
00:28:58,240 --> 00:29:01,560
Speaker 1: cry and be upset, be a like, well, you're always gone,

549
00:29:01,600 --> 00:29:03,560
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna see you this weekend. I could see

550
00:29:03,600 --> 00:29:05,479
Speaker 1: the toll it was starting to take on somebody who

551
00:29:05,560 --> 00:29:08,800
Speaker 1: was really trying to chase their dream. Um, and like

552
00:29:08,920 --> 00:29:10,800
Speaker 1: I realized that that was not going to be good

553
00:29:10,800 --> 00:29:12,480
Speaker 1: for a relationship in the long run, you know what

554
00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:19,240
Speaker 1: I mean. Yeah, because like because it's obviously they're doing

555
00:29:19,280 --> 00:29:23,200
Speaker 1: their best. I'm doing my best. I'm just not doing

556
00:29:23,240 --> 00:29:26,640
Speaker 1: a great job and doing my best. I'm doing my best,

557
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:31,640
Speaker 1: but I'm not doing the best. And um, but eight weeks.

558
00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:34,760
Speaker 1: She's gone for eight weeks, right, Yeah, she's back September

559
00:29:35,000 --> 00:29:39,360
Speaker 1: twenty something. But you're seeing her just no, no, no,

560
00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:42,800
Speaker 1: So I'll see her a lot. So now this was

561
00:29:42,840 --> 00:29:45,720
Speaker 1: the longest stretch, the first like a little over two weeks,

562
00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:49,480
Speaker 1: and then I'm gonna see her like basically every week

563
00:29:49,480 --> 00:29:52,040
Speaker 1: after this, So I mean you could see you too.

564
00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:59,640
Speaker 1: Is it gonna be your first time seeing her perform perform? Yeah? Literally,

565
00:29:59,720 --> 00:30:03,520
Speaker 1: just flying in I know you're the best coming in

566
00:30:03,600 --> 00:30:07,920
Speaker 1: and out. It's gonna be a good time. Um okay.

567
00:30:08,000 --> 00:30:10,920
Speaker 1: Someone said, what's a song that immediately makes you think

568
00:30:10,960 --> 00:30:14,200
Speaker 1: of me? I have so many? I have so many.

569
00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:16,120
Speaker 1: I feel like Laney is a big one. Like a

570
00:30:16,160 --> 00:30:19,320
Speaker 1: lot of Laney songs, I think, do that for me?

571
00:30:19,760 --> 00:30:23,960
Speaker 1: Um Well, the one I have two that I think of,

572
00:30:24,720 --> 00:30:31,520
Speaker 1: I think of stitches because NonStop. When we were on

573
00:30:31,560 --> 00:30:33,680
Speaker 1: the bat, when I stuck my phone in like Joejo

574
00:30:33,760 --> 00:30:37,880
Speaker 1: and I think, you use my phone one time? Freaking

575
00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:41,440
Speaker 1: you have a phone, and I thought, I can't remember. Also,

576
00:30:41,560 --> 00:30:43,800
Speaker 1: it was a phone, but it didn't have cell service.

577
00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:45,200
Speaker 1: It was like an old phone, so I could only

578
00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:46,960
Speaker 1: use it if I had WiFi. But I would listen

579
00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:49,760
Speaker 1: to the producers. Well, I remember we were on a

580
00:30:49,800 --> 00:30:52,520
Speaker 1: plane ride going somewhere and I sat next the plane

581
00:30:52,560 --> 00:30:54,360
Speaker 1: and we were listening to ch Swift and I can't

582
00:30:54,400 --> 00:30:56,280
Speaker 1: was the Wildest Dreams or what was it that we

583
00:30:56,280 --> 00:30:59,480
Speaker 1: were There was some Taylor Shift song that I remember

584
00:30:59,480 --> 00:31:01,600
Speaker 1: we were listening to was late and I were all flying.

585
00:31:02,320 --> 00:31:04,239
Speaker 1: I don't remember what it was. It was probably nine

586
00:31:05,040 --> 00:31:09,400
Speaker 1: something from that album. Because it obsessed um or, I

587
00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:12,680
Speaker 1: don't know so stitches. And then the other one was

588
00:31:13,440 --> 00:31:18,520
Speaker 1: it reminds me of you Antonia, the Alessia Kara song yours.

589
00:31:19,280 --> 00:31:23,440
Speaker 1: Oh it was in Hawaii. We were oh no, that

590
00:31:24,080 --> 00:31:27,160
Speaker 1: that was, um, I want you to ruin my life

591
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:31,800
Speaker 1: your Yeah, that one too. Yeah, I listened to him.

592
00:31:31,800 --> 00:31:34,000
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, Becca, I know, I know. We have

593
00:31:34,080 --> 00:31:37,760
Speaker 1: a lot of those. Um. And then people also are curious,

594
00:31:37,920 --> 00:31:40,160
Speaker 1: I feel like you've talked about this, but what happened

595
00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:42,040
Speaker 1: to cash Pad? People are like a lot of people

596
00:31:42,040 --> 00:31:44,920
Speaker 1: were like, I love cash Pad? What happened first? So

597
00:31:45,080 --> 00:31:49,040
Speaker 1: do I like topless kinda kinda? But you can see

598
00:31:49,080 --> 00:31:54,120
Speaker 1: the one strap? So yeah, I'm not you guys cash bad?

599
00:31:55,000 --> 00:31:58,320
Speaker 1: Can I tell you it was the funniest, most amazing

600
00:31:58,400 --> 00:32:00,440
Speaker 1: thing that jorn I ever got to do to get there.

601
00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:02,880
Speaker 1: The show was incredible. I think what happened is that

602
00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:07,000
Speaker 1: CNBC just the they didn't pick it up for another season.

603
00:32:07,040 --> 00:32:10,760
Speaker 1: They were going to try and do this whole like reality.

604
00:32:10,800 --> 00:32:12,640
Speaker 1: They picked up a bunch of different shows. They wanted

605
00:32:12,640 --> 00:32:15,640
Speaker 1: to start breaking into the reality TV space Because CBC

606
00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:18,280
Speaker 1: it was just known for like the stock market business,

607
00:32:18,360 --> 00:32:21,960
Speaker 1: they were trying to broaden their audience. Um, and so

608
00:32:22,040 --> 00:32:24,960
Speaker 1: before Cash Fred even air, they had basically cut all

609
00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:28,760
Speaker 1: the other shows that they they made except for Cash Bad.

610
00:32:29,520 --> 00:32:32,480
Speaker 1: Um and Cash Bad actually did really well. Like our

611
00:32:32,760 --> 00:32:35,680
Speaker 1: ratings were not like obviously the best they had, but

612
00:32:35,680 --> 00:32:38,440
Speaker 1: they were definitely competitive. They just decided that they weren't

613
00:32:38,440 --> 00:32:41,840
Speaker 1: going to do this like Real Estate Thursday or whatever

614
00:32:41,880 --> 00:32:44,480
Speaker 1: thing they were trying to do. So ever since that

615
00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:46,720
Speaker 1: that hasn't been picked up, I've been like so sad,

616
00:32:46,760 --> 00:32:49,800
Speaker 1: and I'm just like, I hope at some point I

617
00:32:49,840 --> 00:32:54,280
Speaker 1: get the chance to do this for for some other,

618
00:32:54,640 --> 00:32:56,880
Speaker 1: like for anyone really like we do it. But it

619
00:32:56,960 --> 00:32:59,160
Speaker 1: was so fun to be able to do it, to

620
00:32:59,320 --> 00:33:02,240
Speaker 1: film it, show it, and the stuff we did I

621
00:33:02,280 --> 00:33:06,600
Speaker 1: thought was so cool. So long story short, they just

622
00:33:06,800 --> 00:33:11,240
Speaker 1: asked us. But what we're saying is we are manifesting

623
00:33:12,080 --> 00:33:16,120
Speaker 1: another company to pick it up because you y'all loved it.

624
00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:18,840
Speaker 1: You're What I'm saying is it was never y'all's decision

625
00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:21,280
Speaker 1: not to do it. It was network, and I just

626
00:33:21,320 --> 00:33:24,640
Speaker 1: think it was the wrong network. Like unfortunately, we were

627
00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:27,960
Speaker 1: trying to target um an audience that hadn't been in

628
00:33:28,040 --> 00:33:31,040
Speaker 1: that space before. We were definitely like a younger demographic.

629
00:33:31,120 --> 00:33:34,160
Speaker 1: We were trying to get into the reality um that

630
00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:36,600
Speaker 1: sort of home flipping space. And they had other shows

631
00:33:36,600 --> 00:33:38,840
Speaker 1: that they had slated like kind of like a million

632
00:33:38,920 --> 00:33:42,440
Speaker 1: dollar listing, but for there and those didn't even air,

633
00:33:42,560 --> 00:33:45,640
Speaker 1: so Cash I was the only one that aired. UM,

634
00:33:45,680 --> 00:33:48,960
Speaker 1: And yeah, I don't it's just sometimes just how the

635
00:33:49,200 --> 00:34:07,160
Speaker 1: cookie crumbles, I think with TV these days. Do you

636
00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:09,840
Speaker 1: all do you all have um? This was another question

637
00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:12,560
Speaker 1: and I you know, you and I have talked about this.

638
00:34:12,800 --> 00:34:19,200
Speaker 1: Are y'all talking about babies? Yet? No? This house is

639
00:34:19,239 --> 00:34:24,960
Speaker 1: the baby as of now. I came home the other night, um,

640
00:34:25,000 --> 00:34:26,719
Speaker 1: after a long day of the house, and I remember

641
00:34:26,840 --> 00:34:28,480
Speaker 1: joh and I were like sitting on the floor, just

642
00:34:28,520 --> 00:34:32,080
Speaker 1: like in silence, just like not saying anything. And I

643
00:34:32,120 --> 00:34:34,640
Speaker 1: just looked at him and I said, if I had

644
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:38,960
Speaker 1: to come home and take care of my life, I'd

645
00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:44,480
Speaker 1: be in a dark place. I don't have anything. That's

646
00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:48,920
Speaker 1: how I felt in that moment, and I just I

647
00:34:48,960 --> 00:34:51,560
Speaker 1: don't know. It's tough. It's tough because I lost my

648
00:34:51,600 --> 00:34:56,360
Speaker 1: birth control. And I was like, I guess it's time.

649
00:34:57,480 --> 00:35:02,879
Speaker 1: Oh God, right, And then I got back on yesterday. Well,

650
00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:06,440
Speaker 1: so okay, so we can revisit this conversation once the

651
00:35:06,440 --> 00:35:09,600
Speaker 1: house is done and you're settled, and that's what it is.

652
00:35:09,920 --> 00:35:11,799
Speaker 1: That's what it is. Like I think that we're just

653
00:35:11,880 --> 00:35:14,960
Speaker 1: kind of waiting for that moment where we like wake

654
00:35:15,080 --> 00:35:17,000
Speaker 1: up and we both and that's what's gonna it's gonna be.

655
00:35:17,000 --> 00:35:19,160
Speaker 1: It's not like we're waiting really on anything. We just

656
00:35:19,200 --> 00:35:21,279
Speaker 1: want to make sure we're both Like we wake up

657
00:35:21,280 --> 00:35:24,600
Speaker 1: one morning, you're like it's time, Like let's do it. Yeah,

658
00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:27,880
Speaker 1: And I just I don't think. I don't think either

659
00:35:27,920 --> 00:35:30,239
Speaker 1: of us are there yet. Like he likes to joke

660
00:35:30,320 --> 00:35:33,600
Speaker 1: and pretend like he's ready, but I'm like, you're lying.

661
00:35:35,520 --> 00:35:39,840
Speaker 1: So I mean, I totally get it. We did a

662
00:35:39,880 --> 00:35:43,359
Speaker 1: full episode where I talked about we had just watched

663
00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:46,480
Speaker 1: Haley's niece and I was just like, I don't know,

664
00:35:47,320 --> 00:35:52,600
Speaker 1: I don't know if this is my future, but um

665
00:35:52,680 --> 00:35:56,440
Speaker 1: but I love babysitting, Like I watched ms baby like

666
00:35:56,560 --> 00:36:00,879
Speaker 1: multiple times the past couple of weeks because she's so cute.

667
00:36:00,920 --> 00:36:04,160
Speaker 1: But it's so there's the question that we want kids,

668
00:36:04,200 --> 00:36:06,960
Speaker 1: like we both are very excited to have kids, and

669
00:36:07,000 --> 00:36:09,719
Speaker 1: it was just kind of figuring out like when do

670
00:36:09,760 --> 00:36:11,799
Speaker 1: we want to start that journey and It's just hard

671
00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:14,120
Speaker 1: to know because I don't know if I'm going to

672
00:36:14,200 --> 00:36:16,880
Speaker 1: be the type of person that struggles getting pregnant and

673
00:36:17,200 --> 00:36:19,440
Speaker 1: have to go through that sort of pregnancy journey, if

674
00:36:19,480 --> 00:36:21,480
Speaker 1: it's going to be easy for me, Like you just

675
00:36:21,520 --> 00:36:25,200
Speaker 1: don't know. Um So, like if I could look into

676
00:36:25,280 --> 00:36:27,920
Speaker 1: a little glass ball and say, wow, I'm gonna start

677
00:36:28,040 --> 00:36:29,759
Speaker 1: this and then by then I'm going to have the

678
00:36:29,760 --> 00:36:31,480
Speaker 1: baby and then like because that's kind of how my

679
00:36:31,520 --> 00:36:34,440
Speaker 1: mind thinks, I try to like I don't know if

680
00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:36,719
Speaker 1: they plan it out, but like I like to think

681
00:36:36,800 --> 00:36:39,560
Speaker 1: through like, Okay, well, if I'm how old am I are?

682
00:36:39,560 --> 00:36:43,400
Speaker 1: We thirty two in November, That's what I start thinking about.

683
00:36:43,440 --> 00:36:45,480
Speaker 1: Like I'm like if I never want to kids and

684
00:36:45,560 --> 00:36:47,040
Speaker 1: I don't want to have them back to back, Like

685
00:36:47,040 --> 00:36:50,640
Speaker 1: how I can space this out? So I think in

686
00:36:50,680 --> 00:36:52,839
Speaker 1: the near future, Becca, I don't think it'll be like

687
00:36:52,880 --> 00:36:55,239
Speaker 1: five years. But I think we're just waiting for that

688
00:36:55,320 --> 00:36:59,560
Speaker 1: moment to like be excited to start trying. Yeah, I mean,

689
00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:02,399
Speaker 1: there's been so y'all have done. There's been so much

690
00:37:02,400 --> 00:37:04,959
Speaker 1: going on in your life. It's not like you've had

691
00:37:05,080 --> 00:37:08,680
Speaker 1: this like lull where you could even think about that.

692
00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:12,319
Speaker 1: I don't have a baby line now, which is so crazy, Like,

693
00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:14,239
Speaker 1: you know what you mean, Jojo, I thought i'd be

694
00:37:14,280 --> 00:37:17,960
Speaker 1: married to a man with two kids by so jokes

695
00:37:18,040 --> 00:37:22,600
Speaker 1: on all of us, I guess, But I you know,

696
00:37:22,880 --> 00:37:26,239
Speaker 1: things sometimes go in a different direction and are going

697
00:37:26,280 --> 00:37:28,880
Speaker 1: to happen how they're supposed to. I agree, But I

698
00:37:28,920 --> 00:37:31,440
Speaker 1: also think we both I mean, we were raised in

699
00:37:31,480 --> 00:37:37,799
Speaker 1: a very similar culture and homes, Like there is like

700
00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:43,200
Speaker 1: a pressure that you're supposed to have certain things accomplished

701
00:37:43,200 --> 00:37:48,240
Speaker 1: by a certain age. But then there's also science and

702
00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:51,160
Speaker 1: the fact that getting older does like you do have

703
00:37:51,200 --> 00:37:54,239
Speaker 1: to take these things into consideration. You know. What's like

704
00:37:54,360 --> 00:37:56,160
Speaker 1: the biggest thing I think for me that makes me

705
00:37:56,239 --> 00:37:58,600
Speaker 1: want to do it, Um, I think a little sooner

706
00:37:59,400 --> 00:38:01,920
Speaker 1: maybe I'm like ready for is like I look at

707
00:38:01,960 --> 00:38:05,000
Speaker 1: how amazing of grandparents my mom and dad are and

708
00:38:05,040 --> 00:38:07,280
Speaker 1: how active they are with my niece and my nephew,

709
00:38:07,400 --> 00:38:09,640
Speaker 1: and they still have this youth to them where they

710
00:38:09,640 --> 00:38:12,040
Speaker 1: can run around and go to the trampoline park, and

711
00:38:12,080 --> 00:38:14,600
Speaker 1: I just think, like, man, I really want that for

712
00:38:14,719 --> 00:38:16,719
Speaker 1: my kids, Like I want all of my kids to

713
00:38:16,760 --> 00:38:19,200
Speaker 1: be able to have Grandma and Grandpappy big parts of

714
00:38:19,280 --> 00:38:22,920
Speaker 1: your life. Because I didn't get that like my grandma, grandparents.

715
00:38:23,480 --> 00:38:26,279
Speaker 1: My grandparents passed away when I was pretty young, so

716
00:38:26,400 --> 00:38:29,800
Speaker 1: I never had that like strong like pull to my

717
00:38:29,920 --> 00:38:32,600
Speaker 1: grandparents the way I see Maverick having with my mom,

718
00:38:32,719 --> 00:38:37,240
Speaker 1: Like my mom is mavericks favorite person on this planet,

719
00:38:37,400 --> 00:38:40,200
Speaker 1: and I'm like that it seems so special to me. Yeah,

720
00:38:40,480 --> 00:38:44,680
Speaker 1: that's that makes sense. I mean I think that's very Um,

721
00:38:48,280 --> 00:38:49,880
Speaker 1: I think about their age where they think about my

722
00:38:49,960 --> 00:38:53,440
Speaker 1: age obviously, Like, yeah, you're like, I don't worry about myself,

723
00:38:53,560 --> 00:38:56,560
Speaker 1: but people are getting pregnant at all ages now, Like

724
00:38:56,640 --> 00:38:59,160
Speaker 1: I don't really like that doesn't scare me as much.

725
00:39:00,719 --> 00:39:03,000
Speaker 1: But again, like I don't know what that journey is

726
00:39:03,000 --> 00:39:05,759
Speaker 1: gonna be like for me. So right, Well, like you said,

727
00:39:05,840 --> 00:39:08,360
Speaker 1: I mean, everything happens in the time that it was

728
00:39:08,360 --> 00:39:13,240
Speaker 1: supposed to happen exactly, and that's something you can rest

729
00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:20,120
Speaker 1: your head easy on. That's right. Um, what's next career wise?

730
00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:24,200
Speaker 1: Do you want to do? Like every a lot of

731
00:39:24,239 --> 00:39:26,800
Speaker 1: people are like I love to fledge what happened to fledge?

732
00:39:27,040 --> 00:39:33,920
Speaker 1: And I mean everything manifesting? What are manifesting a clothing line? Well, no,

733
00:39:34,239 --> 00:39:37,719
Speaker 1: Fletch was a huge success and unfortunately it was a

734
00:39:38,239 --> 00:39:43,000
Speaker 1: situation with our business partners where that relationship was ended

735
00:39:43,120 --> 00:39:44,920
Speaker 1: sour and there was some stuff going on that I

736
00:39:44,960 --> 00:39:46,560
Speaker 1: didn't know about, and so that was like one of

737
00:39:46,600 --> 00:39:49,080
Speaker 1: those things that was completely out of my control. Um.

738
00:39:49,920 --> 00:39:52,239
Speaker 1: And it's been like a really hard thing to try

739
00:39:52,280 --> 00:39:55,040
Speaker 1: and pick back up and do totally on my own. Um.

740
00:39:55,719 --> 00:39:58,759
Speaker 1: But I mean my focus, you know, it's always been

741
00:39:58,840 --> 00:40:01,440
Speaker 1: like the house stuff. Like I feel like since I

742
00:40:01,560 --> 00:40:03,919
Speaker 1: was doing the remodeling stuff before I everyone on the show,

743
00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:07,440
Speaker 1: and like continuing with that, Um, I'm working on a

744
00:40:08,040 --> 00:40:10,359
Speaker 1: home to poor line which has been like two years

745
00:40:10,400 --> 00:40:12,680
Speaker 1: in the making, which is so fun for me. Is

746
00:40:12,719 --> 00:40:15,560
Speaker 1: that your own? Is that your own? I didn't know.

747
00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:17,239
Speaker 1: You didn't tell me anything. You just told me you

748
00:40:17,280 --> 00:40:19,520
Speaker 1: were coming to shoot photos. No, you told me. I

749
00:40:19,560 --> 00:40:23,279
Speaker 1: didn't know you were doing a whole thing on your own. Well, yeah,

750
00:40:23,320 --> 00:40:27,200
Speaker 1: it's the it's this is the person I've talked about

751
00:40:27,280 --> 00:40:33,439
Speaker 1: it a scrubbing an exclusive. You've heard it here first.

752
00:40:33,440 --> 00:40:34,879
Speaker 1: Are you allowed to say the name of it yet?

753
00:40:35,840 --> 00:40:38,680
Speaker 1: It's just uh Joe, I mean I don't even know

754
00:40:38,719 --> 00:40:41,080
Speaker 1: if we It's just Jode Fletcher home and and it'll

755
00:40:41,120 --> 00:40:45,200
Speaker 1: be sold in retail stores so it's mostly retail, focusing

756
00:40:45,320 --> 00:40:48,920
Speaker 1: on home goods. Homegoods the store, and we're still working

757
00:40:48,960 --> 00:40:51,720
Speaker 1: through all the stuff, but we just launched in Canada

758
00:40:53,719 --> 00:40:56,600
Speaker 1: at home since Yeah, so I'm supposed to do a

759
00:40:56,760 --> 00:41:01,480
Speaker 1: story on my Instagram, but now that we're talking about it,

760
00:41:02,160 --> 00:41:04,480
Speaker 1: you will just yeah, We'll save this clip for you

761
00:41:04,640 --> 00:41:06,160
Speaker 1: and then you can post it on your story and

762
00:41:06,239 --> 00:41:07,960
Speaker 1: that there you go. You know, It's just it's I

763
00:41:08,080 --> 00:41:09,440
Speaker 1: gonna be working on for a while and I'm really

764
00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:12,759
Speaker 1: excited about um. I think just having something in my

765
00:41:12,840 --> 00:41:14,960
Speaker 1: own like I remember with Fletch, Like I was so

766
00:41:15,160 --> 00:41:18,520
Speaker 1: proud because I was so involved and invested in the

767
00:41:18,600 --> 00:41:21,000
Speaker 1: creation of that line and I saw just how much

768
00:41:21,080 --> 00:41:24,920
Speaker 1: people loved it. So when that didn't continue, I was

769
00:41:25,000 --> 00:41:27,920
Speaker 1: so heartbroken about it. So I just did my focus to, like,

770
00:41:28,080 --> 00:41:29,800
Speaker 1: what's something that I love and do in my daily

771
00:41:29,880 --> 00:41:32,720
Speaker 1: life that I can pour this energy into. And obviously

772
00:41:32,880 --> 00:41:35,640
Speaker 1: the home stuff was like a baby for me. It's

773
00:41:35,640 --> 00:41:38,400
Speaker 1: like something that I love to do. So that is

774
00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:41,439
Speaker 1: what I've been working on and then just manifesting keeping

775
00:41:41,560 --> 00:41:44,160
Speaker 1: these shows going because I gotta tell you, like one

776
00:41:44,200 --> 00:41:48,360
Speaker 1: thing Jordan, I really love doing together, it's hosting. I

777
00:41:48,640 --> 00:41:51,160
Speaker 1: love hosting. I don't know why. I just love it

778
00:41:51,239 --> 00:41:54,800
Speaker 1: so much. So y'all are so y'all are so it's okay.

779
00:41:54,960 --> 00:41:58,960
Speaker 1: Here's the thing. Good host make it look easy to host.

780
00:41:59,080 --> 00:42:01,160
Speaker 1: But just for all of you listening ouf there, it

781
00:42:01,360 --> 00:42:05,680
Speaker 1: is not easy to naturally host something. And like you

782
00:42:05,840 --> 00:42:09,600
Speaker 1: can tell when someone's not comfortable doing it. Like if

783
00:42:09,640 --> 00:42:12,359
Speaker 1: you want to see an example, I remember the first

784
00:42:12,400 --> 00:42:15,799
Speaker 1: show I ever did. It's like not a comfortable thing

785
00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:20,120
Speaker 1: to do for the first time, Like I was so nervous. Yeah,

786
00:42:20,160 --> 00:42:22,240
Speaker 1: but you've always been natural. And then you and Jordan

787
00:42:22,320 --> 00:42:25,840
Speaker 1: are both so good together, which really works out for

788
00:42:25,960 --> 00:42:29,240
Speaker 1: both of you. You know, y'all are just like Barbie

789
00:42:29,320 --> 00:42:33,520
Speaker 1: and Ken, y'all are good. It's just honestly, it's something

790
00:42:33,640 --> 00:42:35,880
Speaker 1: that we love doing together. Like when we filmed The

791
00:42:35,960 --> 00:42:39,200
Speaker 1: Big Day, um, just all the shows we go toge there,

792
00:42:39,239 --> 00:42:41,319
Speaker 1: but it was just like, you know what, we're both

793
00:42:41,400 --> 00:42:43,880
Speaker 1: really hard workers, and we had thousands of lines and

794
00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:45,759
Speaker 1: stuff that we had to know, and we would stay

795
00:42:45,840 --> 00:42:47,840
Speaker 1: up all nine making sure we never had to resort

796
00:42:47,920 --> 00:42:50,759
Speaker 1: back to our cards or to prompt and it was

797
00:42:50,800 --> 00:42:52,680
Speaker 1: just one of those things where like we were exhausted,

798
00:42:52,760 --> 00:42:54,960
Speaker 1: we had been studying all these lines, and a lot

799
00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:56,760
Speaker 1: of the times you don't get your scripts and stuff

800
00:42:56,840 --> 00:43:01,680
Speaker 1: to like hours before, sometimes like minutes before. But at

801
00:43:01,719 --> 00:43:02,759
Speaker 1: the end of it, we were like, you know what,

802
00:43:03,000 --> 00:43:05,080
Speaker 1: like this is actually something that we really love doing together.

803
00:43:05,160 --> 00:43:07,320
Speaker 1: We have so much fun doing it. And then I

804
00:43:07,440 --> 00:43:09,799
Speaker 1: think just being a part of like production is really

805
00:43:09,840 --> 00:43:11,759
Speaker 1: cool for us, Like we like being on the other

806
00:43:11,840 --> 00:43:13,719
Speaker 1: side of it and kind of seeing how it all

807
00:43:13,800 --> 00:43:16,919
Speaker 1: goes down, and I don't know, it's just really cool.

808
00:43:17,320 --> 00:43:20,759
Speaker 1: We really love that. So truth truthfully, this is what

809
00:43:21,120 --> 00:43:23,560
Speaker 1: could happen. This is what we're putting out there. Jojo

810
00:43:23,640 --> 00:43:29,160
Speaker 1: and Jordan's create, produce direct their own show that they

811
00:43:29,360 --> 00:43:34,200
Speaker 1: start in flipping homes while they're wearing JoJo's clothing line

812
00:43:34,680 --> 00:43:39,920
Speaker 1: and using her home decor. Let's just manifest it all

813
00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:42,840
Speaker 1: that was my that was me doing that for you.

814
00:43:43,400 --> 00:43:46,040
Speaker 1: Thank you. What's the what's the decor? Like? What is

815
00:43:46,080 --> 00:43:48,880
Speaker 1: it like pillow? What is it? So we're starting, I

816
00:43:48,920 --> 00:43:50,919
Speaker 1: mean with the last couple of years, I mean we've

817
00:43:50,960 --> 00:43:55,440
Speaker 1: talked about it, just with like shipping logistics, manufacturing material.

818
00:43:55,560 --> 00:43:57,760
Speaker 1: That's been like tough and that's why this has taken

819
00:43:57,840 --> 00:44:00,320
Speaker 1: so long, because we had a full line sheet of

820
00:44:00,400 --> 00:44:04,480
Speaker 1: these products that ranged from like small tabletop accessories in

821
00:44:04,560 --> 00:44:09,400
Speaker 1: decor to bigger kind of bigger but smaller furniture like

822
00:44:09,520 --> 00:44:14,920
Speaker 1: exite tables or automatiums or benches, um, and just with

823
00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:17,239
Speaker 1: how difficult everything has been the last couple of years.

824
00:44:17,360 --> 00:44:19,920
Speaker 1: Materials have been so difficult, so we're started starting to

825
00:44:20,040 --> 00:44:22,440
Speaker 1: just like roll out as we come now. So right

826
00:44:22,520 --> 00:44:25,200
Speaker 1: now we have a lot of organizational pieces. We have

827
00:44:25,840 --> 00:44:30,799
Speaker 1: amazing baskets, like I'm a big basket lovers, so baskets, pillows,

828
00:44:30,960 --> 00:44:33,719
Speaker 1: we have some art um and then a lot of

829
00:44:33,880 --> 00:44:38,319
Speaker 1: cute just like tabletop decorum, and we're getting into other

830
00:44:38,480 --> 00:44:41,880
Speaker 1: things like every week we have a meeting of designing

831
00:44:42,000 --> 00:44:44,040
Speaker 1: and putting things up on our vision board, and so

832
00:44:44,160 --> 00:44:48,680
Speaker 1: it's just kind of an ongoing collaboration. Will you send

833
00:44:48,719 --> 00:44:50,720
Speaker 1: me the line sheets so I can see the benches.

834
00:44:50,800 --> 00:44:52,279
Speaker 1: I need a bench for the end of my bed.

835
00:44:52,360 --> 00:44:55,440
Speaker 1: I'm having a really hard time. I saw that. Well

836
00:44:55,520 --> 00:44:57,840
Speaker 1: you just come to like all I need is for

837
00:44:57,960 --> 00:45:00,120
Speaker 1: you to come and look at my space and be like,

838
00:45:00,280 --> 00:45:03,040
Speaker 1: order this, this and this, help me do that for you.

839
00:45:03,400 --> 00:45:04,600
Speaker 1: I can do that for you. I know you have

840
00:45:04,719 --> 00:45:08,600
Speaker 1: no free time, but like, I just need help. Try

841
00:45:08,640 --> 00:45:12,200
Speaker 1: to hire me the other day to decorate their home

842
00:45:12,280 --> 00:45:13,960
Speaker 1: and I and it's a friend of mine here, and

843
00:45:14,040 --> 00:45:19,799
Speaker 1: I was like, I like, can't even know. I love

844
00:45:19,840 --> 00:45:22,880
Speaker 1: you with the answers and no, okay, what if I

845
00:45:22,960 --> 00:45:25,080
Speaker 1: do say I need No, I can help you. I'm

846
00:45:25,080 --> 00:45:27,200
Speaker 1: just kiddy. This is the whole house. She was asking, Okay,

847
00:45:27,440 --> 00:45:29,920
Speaker 1: I just need a few things here and there, and

848
00:45:30,840 --> 00:45:33,800
Speaker 1: your house looks great. But yes, let's do it. No,

849
00:45:34,080 --> 00:45:37,759
Speaker 1: I'm I'm bored. I want to redo everything. Let's do it, says.

850
00:45:52,840 --> 00:45:57,440
Speaker 1: We have emails where we give the best advice we

851
00:45:57,600 --> 00:46:00,960
Speaker 1: can give to people who need it. So um, this

852
00:46:01,160 --> 00:46:05,839
Speaker 1: first one is from anonymous, and she said, I don't

853
00:46:05,880 --> 00:46:08,439
Speaker 1: know if it's as she they say. Should I reach

854
00:46:08,520 --> 00:46:11,000
Speaker 1: out to my childhood best friend Although she told me

855
00:46:11,080 --> 00:46:13,719
Speaker 1: the week of my wedding she wasn't coming, she was

856
00:46:13,760 --> 00:46:17,600
Speaker 1: a bridesmaid, we haven't spoken for months. Some background. We

857
00:46:17,680 --> 00:46:19,759
Speaker 1: have been best friends since we were twelve. I am

858
00:46:19,840 --> 00:46:22,600
Speaker 1: thirty two now. Three years ago, my best friend lost

859
00:46:22,680 --> 00:46:25,879
Speaker 1: her boyfriend unexpectedly to a heart disorder no one knew about.

860
00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:29,200
Speaker 1: She was distraught, as expected. I tried to be there

861
00:46:29,239 --> 00:46:31,160
Speaker 1: for her as much as possible, but I was pregnant

862
00:46:31,200 --> 00:46:33,920
Speaker 1: with my third and in my online master's program. My

863
00:46:34,080 --> 00:46:36,719
Speaker 1: new this was all happening while in the pandemic. She

864
00:46:36,840 --> 00:46:39,120
Speaker 1: slowly started pushing me away. She didn't come to my

865
00:46:39,239 --> 00:46:42,160
Speaker 1: gender reveal, my baby shower, and never met my baby girl.

866
00:46:42,360 --> 00:46:44,360
Speaker 1: She has one and a half now. I tried to

867
00:46:44,400 --> 00:46:47,160
Speaker 1: reach out so many times, but she always canceled our plans.

868
00:46:47,560 --> 00:46:49,759
Speaker 1: She also didn't make it to my bachelorette party or

869
00:46:49,840 --> 00:46:53,600
Speaker 1: bride'smaid dinner I hosted. She bought her dress and rs VP.

870
00:46:54,080 --> 00:46:56,319
Speaker 1: About three months before my wedding, she moved into her

871
00:46:56,360 --> 00:46:59,359
Speaker 1: sister's house to be closer to work. Soon after she moved,

872
00:46:59,400 --> 00:47:02,480
Speaker 1: she told me her sister's husband was sick and immuno compromise.

873
00:47:02,840 --> 00:47:05,560
Speaker 1: She never said anything about not attending my wedding until

874
00:47:05,600 --> 00:47:07,640
Speaker 1: the week of. She said she didn't want to put

875
00:47:07,719 --> 00:47:10,279
Speaker 1: him at risk and would not come at all, not

876
00:47:10,480 --> 00:47:12,800
Speaker 1: even to the ceremony. Mind you, she had been in

877
00:47:12,920 --> 00:47:15,000
Speaker 1: Vegas the week before. I could not handle it and

878
00:47:15,080 --> 00:47:17,200
Speaker 1: told her this would really affect our friendship and that

879
00:47:17,320 --> 00:47:23,680
Speaker 1: I was hurt. What should I do help? Please? Wow? Yeah,

880
00:47:24,320 --> 00:47:29,080
Speaker 1: I mean I do I go? First year before is yours?

881
00:47:29,640 --> 00:47:32,359
Speaker 1: I don't really know, because it seems like she's been trying.

882
00:47:32,400 --> 00:47:34,080
Speaker 1: I think it's that she hadn't just is their name.

883
00:47:34,080 --> 00:47:36,880
Speaker 1: Anonymous seels like Anonymous has tried for a while to

884
00:47:37,080 --> 00:47:41,000
Speaker 1: bridge that gap in their friendship, and I'm a you know,

885
00:47:41,080 --> 00:47:44,120
Speaker 1: there's only so much you can do, I think, to

886
00:47:45,400 --> 00:47:48,360
Speaker 1: to make things better. It definitely takes both people. But

887
00:47:48,480 --> 00:47:50,440
Speaker 1: I also, on the other hand, do you believe that

888
00:47:50,520 --> 00:47:56,239
Speaker 1: she might be going through something that's obviously really hurting her.

889
00:47:56,480 --> 00:48:00,080
Speaker 1: It's affecting her in a way. So my advice to

890
00:48:00,120 --> 00:48:02,160
Speaker 1: be if your heart is still pulling you to try

891
00:48:02,239 --> 00:48:05,480
Speaker 1: and like mend this friendship, and if you're asking should

892
00:48:05,480 --> 00:48:08,920
Speaker 1: you do it again? I'm the type of person that, like,

893
00:48:09,040 --> 00:48:10,800
Speaker 1: if my heart telling you do something, I'll do it.

894
00:48:10,920 --> 00:48:14,279
Speaker 1: But I also am a firm believer that, like, there's

895
00:48:14,320 --> 00:48:17,640
Speaker 1: only so much you can do, right, So I don't know,

896
00:48:17,800 --> 00:48:20,480
Speaker 1: that's what do you think? Well? I think grief is

897
00:48:20,520 --> 00:48:24,000
Speaker 1: a really complicated thing and it's not the same for everybody.

898
00:48:24,120 --> 00:48:29,080
Speaker 1: And like losing someone who is a romantic partner, I mean,

899
00:48:29,160 --> 00:48:32,239
Speaker 1: losing anyone that's close to you, it's you never know

900
00:48:32,480 --> 00:48:34,400
Speaker 1: how you're going to act or what it's going to

901
00:48:34,480 --> 00:48:36,520
Speaker 1: be like for you. And I think a lot of

902
00:48:36,600 --> 00:48:40,200
Speaker 1: these things that she's missed have been celebrating really happy moments,

903
00:48:40,360 --> 00:48:43,600
Speaker 1: and she might not have the capacity to to be that,

904
00:48:43,960 --> 00:48:46,120
Speaker 1: Like she might not have the capacity to bring to

905
00:48:46,239 --> 00:48:49,120
Speaker 1: be happy or be happy for other people because she's

906
00:48:49,520 --> 00:48:52,480
Speaker 1: grieving a huge loss. I don't think it makes it

907
00:48:52,719 --> 00:48:55,040
Speaker 1: right that she's missed all these things, but I'm just saying, like,

908
00:48:55,160 --> 00:48:58,279
Speaker 1: trying to understand like why she would miss these like

909
00:48:58,440 --> 00:49:01,600
Speaker 1: monumental things of her best sprunt since childhood. Is the

910
00:49:01,719 --> 00:49:04,480
Speaker 1: only thing I can say is that, like, grief can

911
00:49:04,840 --> 00:49:07,840
Speaker 1: hit in unexpected ways, and maybe she has anxiety about

912
00:49:08,200 --> 00:49:11,719
Speaker 1: these big events and especially a wedding. I imagine that's

913
00:49:11,719 --> 00:49:15,920
Speaker 1: probably really complicated to navigate her feelings. And sometimes, um,

914
00:49:16,520 --> 00:49:21,920
Speaker 1: I think sometimes grief makes people feel um selfish, but

915
00:49:22,040 --> 00:49:27,400
Speaker 1: not in a not in a way that's meant to

916
00:49:27,480 --> 00:49:31,800
Speaker 1: be manipulative or evil or I mean, it's just she

917
00:49:32,000 --> 00:49:34,319
Speaker 1: might be like I can't I don't think I can

918
00:49:34,400 --> 00:49:38,919
Speaker 1: handle watching you get to experience something was that I'll

919
00:49:38,960 --> 00:49:42,160
Speaker 1: never get to experience because my person is gone. Maybe

920
00:49:42,239 --> 00:49:45,080
Speaker 1: the conversation, though, is like you said, it's like, is

921
00:49:45,200 --> 00:49:48,319
Speaker 1: allow allow that to be her answer, like give her

922
00:49:48,360 --> 00:49:51,440
Speaker 1: the opportunity to say, Okay, maybe this is what you're

923
00:49:51,480 --> 00:49:53,040
Speaker 1: going through. I don't know. I just want you to

924
00:49:53,080 --> 00:49:54,640
Speaker 1: know how much I love you and I care about you,

925
00:49:54,719 --> 00:49:56,279
Speaker 1: and if this is something that you're going through, like

926
00:49:56,560 --> 00:49:58,319
Speaker 1: know that you can talk to me about it because

927
00:49:58,360 --> 00:50:01,359
Speaker 1: I miss you and I miss our frien. And that's

928
00:50:01,400 --> 00:50:04,200
Speaker 1: a good point. Yeah, I think it's having a conversation

929
00:50:04,320 --> 00:50:08,200
Speaker 1: and saying, like, you know, this is really hard to

930
00:50:08,280 --> 00:50:10,719
Speaker 1: hear that you're not going to be at this huge day.

931
00:50:10,840 --> 00:50:13,920
Speaker 1: I know that it's probably really complicated for you and

932
00:50:14,600 --> 00:50:18,680
Speaker 1: through your loss, but I love you. I want to

933
00:50:18,760 --> 00:50:20,800
Speaker 1: be there for you, like if you can let me,

934
00:50:21,440 --> 00:50:23,840
Speaker 1: I agree. So yeah, I would just have a conversation

935
00:50:23,880 --> 00:50:25,239
Speaker 1: and see how you feel, and also let her know

936
00:50:25,360 --> 00:50:28,160
Speaker 1: that you're there for her and you know that life

937
00:50:28,200 --> 00:50:32,160
Speaker 1: has moved on and it's hard and maybe like obviously

938
00:50:32,200 --> 00:50:34,600
Speaker 1: it's been a long time and she hasn't obviously given

939
00:50:35,000 --> 00:50:38,280
Speaker 1: anonymous like sort of that conversation that she's been needing.

940
00:50:38,440 --> 00:50:41,080
Speaker 1: But I always say this, like just give grace when

941
00:50:41,120 --> 00:50:44,000
Speaker 1: you can because you never know obviously what that person

942
00:50:44,120 --> 00:50:46,360
Speaker 1: is going through and it probably has nothing to do

943
00:50:46,480 --> 00:50:51,560
Speaker 1: with you. Yeah, give grace, be patient, be there. That's

944
00:50:52,000 --> 00:50:57,800
Speaker 1: really hard. I'm really sorry for everybody involved. It sounds complicated. Okay,

945
00:50:58,040 --> 00:51:02,080
Speaker 1: this is from Bianca I own previous podcasts. Becca share

946
00:51:02,200 --> 00:51:05,120
Speaker 1: she was going to couples counseling. If she's willing to share,

947
00:51:05,160 --> 00:51:07,040
Speaker 1: I want to get some more insights on what both

948
00:51:07,239 --> 00:51:08,879
Speaker 1: what got both of you to the point of going,

949
00:51:08,960 --> 00:51:11,520
Speaker 1: Like when do you determine a relationship is worth fighting

950
00:51:11,560 --> 00:51:14,000
Speaker 1: for to go to counseling. Some backstory. I've been with

951
00:51:14,080 --> 00:51:16,040
Speaker 1: my boyfriend for four years, and we both come from

952
00:51:16,080 --> 00:51:18,879
Speaker 1: backgrounds where counseling in general is not talked about enough.

953
00:51:19,200 --> 00:51:21,960
Speaker 1: I started to attend individual counseling to better myself, and

954
00:51:22,040 --> 00:51:24,800
Speaker 1: I think I'm at the point of exploring if couples

955
00:51:24,840 --> 00:51:27,759
Speaker 1: counseling is our next solution to saving our relationship. We

956
00:51:27,840 --> 00:51:30,560
Speaker 1: have problems with communicating and hearing each other out, and

957
00:51:30,640 --> 00:51:32,800
Speaker 1: we are both very stubborn people and can't seem to

958
00:51:33,600 --> 00:51:36,879
Speaker 1: come to a compromising arguments. I know I've talked about

959
00:51:36,920 --> 00:51:41,120
Speaker 1: this with you, Jojo, but Haley and I'm from the

960
00:51:41,320 --> 00:51:45,440
Speaker 1: moment we met realized we are very different people. We

961
00:51:45,760 --> 00:51:50,719
Speaker 1: argue differently, we communicate differently, and um, it just got

962
00:51:50,800 --> 00:51:54,040
Speaker 1: to a point where it felt the same, like, are

963
00:51:54,640 --> 00:51:56,319
Speaker 1: are we ever going to get to a place where

964
00:51:56,360 --> 00:51:59,399
Speaker 1: we can do this in a healthy and productive way?

965
00:52:00,120 --> 00:52:04,319
Speaker 1: And she I think actually Haley suggested like a couple

966
00:52:04,320 --> 00:52:06,440
Speaker 1: of therapy. In my mind, I was like, that sounds

967
00:52:06,480 --> 00:52:08,920
Speaker 1: like doomsday. Like that sounds like if we're on a

968
00:52:08,960 --> 00:52:11,560
Speaker 1: couple of therapy, that's the beginning of the end. And

969
00:52:11,680 --> 00:52:14,879
Speaker 1: it has been the greatest thing to happen, not only

970
00:52:14,960 --> 00:52:17,880
Speaker 1: to our relationship, but to every relationship I have, like

971
00:52:18,120 --> 00:52:21,440
Speaker 1: with my friends and my family, everybody, because it's helped

972
00:52:21,600 --> 00:52:24,960
Speaker 1: me learn how to communicate like my family, not my family,

973
00:52:25,239 --> 00:52:29,120
Speaker 1: helped me to communicate my needs, how I'm feeling and um,

974
00:52:29,640 --> 00:52:33,239
Speaker 1: So I think that it can be such a beautiful thing.

975
00:52:33,360 --> 00:52:35,399
Speaker 1: And also like sometimes maybe you go to a couple

976
00:52:35,400 --> 00:52:37,480
Speaker 1: of therapy and you can't work it out, and that's

977
00:52:37,560 --> 00:52:41,080
Speaker 1: just like, hey, we've done everything, you know, like that

978
00:52:41,280 --> 00:52:43,719
Speaker 1: at least will give you a sense of feeling like

979
00:52:43,880 --> 00:52:46,719
Speaker 1: you gave it your all. Um. But yeah, I think

980
00:52:46,760 --> 00:52:50,759
Speaker 1: there's like a weird uh stigma around it. I had

981
00:52:50,880 --> 00:52:54,919
Speaker 1: that stigma. So I say that from experience, um, where

982
00:52:54,960 --> 00:52:58,800
Speaker 1: it feels like, oh no, like we're going to couples counseling,

983
00:52:58,880 --> 00:53:01,440
Speaker 1: that's not good, but it really has just helped us

984
00:53:01,480 --> 00:53:04,440
Speaker 1: both like as individuals and as a couple. That's what

985
00:53:04,480 --> 00:53:06,360
Speaker 1: I was gonna say, because like I've only done a

986
00:53:06,440 --> 00:53:08,920
Speaker 1: couple of therapy ones and it was in with a

987
00:53:09,000 --> 00:53:12,200
Speaker 1: former boyfriend, which was a horrible relationship. Like this person

988
00:53:12,360 --> 00:53:15,200
Speaker 1: wasn't not who I was gonna be with. Like that

989
00:53:15,600 --> 00:53:19,600
Speaker 1: was doomsday. That should have been. Like however, um, you

990
00:53:19,680 --> 00:53:22,680
Speaker 1: know when you said that, like the communication thing, I

991
00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:26,640
Speaker 1: think no matter what whether you I mean are you

992
00:53:26,920 --> 00:53:30,160
Speaker 1: don't argue you have problems. Everyone is so different, right,

993
00:53:30,239 --> 00:53:32,920
Speaker 1: Like you communicate differently, you feel things differently. And the

994
00:53:33,000 --> 00:53:34,959
Speaker 1: one thing that you said, Becca is like you guys

995
00:53:35,040 --> 00:53:36,719
Speaker 1: go to a couple of therapy together, but you also

996
00:53:36,760 --> 00:53:39,640
Speaker 1: do individual sessions. And I feel like that is something.

997
00:53:39,719 --> 00:53:41,600
Speaker 1: And if you talk to Jordan about this just because

998
00:53:41,680 --> 00:53:45,680
Speaker 1: like we also handle stress differently, So whether that means

999
00:53:45,760 --> 00:53:48,399
Speaker 1: like he keeps it to himself but or I keep

1000
00:53:48,440 --> 00:53:51,560
Speaker 1: mind to myself and whether or not we realize it,

1001
00:53:51,680 --> 00:53:54,399
Speaker 1: sometimes that can come out in relationships and it has

1002
00:53:54,520 --> 00:53:57,440
Speaker 1: nothing to do with you or with him, or with

1003
00:53:57,600 --> 00:54:00,880
Speaker 1: y'all or with I'm talking about in your relationship. And

1004
00:54:01,080 --> 00:54:04,880
Speaker 1: it's just like talking to somebody about how you can

1005
00:54:04,960 --> 00:54:09,319
Speaker 1: better pay handle your stress, but I'll better handle conversations communication.

1006
00:54:09,360 --> 00:54:12,200
Speaker 1: And I like the idea of a couple of therapy.

1007
00:54:12,600 --> 00:54:14,320
Speaker 1: I mean, in general, I don't think it has to

1008
00:54:14,360 --> 00:54:17,439
Speaker 1: be a last resort like I think. I think Jordan,

1009
00:54:17,440 --> 00:54:19,160
Speaker 1: I've talked about this, like we want to do that

1010
00:54:19,640 --> 00:54:22,080
Speaker 1: just because I think it's proactive. It's it's how you

1011
00:54:22,760 --> 00:54:25,960
Speaker 1: create I think, a stronger relationship. We still haven't done

1012
00:54:26,040 --> 00:54:28,520
Speaker 1: that because we don't feel like there's this like I

1013
00:54:28,560 --> 00:54:29,960
Speaker 1: feel like there's so much has been going on and

1014
00:54:30,040 --> 00:54:32,360
Speaker 1: there's not the sense of urgency like oh we're having trouble,

1015
00:54:32,440 --> 00:54:35,040
Speaker 1: so we can go to therapy. But I hear how

1016
00:54:35,600 --> 00:54:37,600
Speaker 1: much it's helped you and Haley, and I've used that

1017
00:54:37,680 --> 00:54:39,759
Speaker 1: as an example of like, oh, this should be really

1018
00:54:39,840 --> 00:54:42,520
Speaker 1: good because they give you different exercises and different things,

1019
00:54:42,560 --> 00:54:44,920
Speaker 1: are different ways to look at things and how to

1020
00:54:45,000 --> 00:54:47,480
Speaker 1: process your own emotions so that you can be like

1021
00:54:47,560 --> 00:54:50,640
Speaker 1: the best version of yourself. Yeah, I was gonna say,

1022
00:54:50,719 --> 00:54:53,480
Speaker 1: I even think it's like there's times where Haley and

1023
00:54:53,560 --> 00:54:55,839
Speaker 1: I were great and like we go to a couple

1024
00:54:55,880 --> 00:54:58,360
Speaker 1: of therapy and it's we don't really have anything to

1025
00:54:58,440 --> 00:55:01,640
Speaker 1: talk about, but we get to re establish, like what

1026
00:55:01,920 --> 00:55:04,319
Speaker 1: was something that you appreciated about each other this week?

1027
00:55:04,360 --> 00:55:07,239
Speaker 1: And just like little check ins that I love that

1028
00:55:07,640 --> 00:55:10,399
Speaker 1: they're like small, but they add up and they make

1029
00:55:10,480 --> 00:55:12,800
Speaker 1: such a difference. So I say, if he's willing to

1030
00:55:12,920 --> 00:55:15,400
Speaker 1: do it, sometimes that's the hard part. If both parties

1031
00:55:15,440 --> 00:55:19,240
Speaker 1: aren't willing to do it. Um, you can't force somebody,

1032
00:55:19,320 --> 00:55:22,799
Speaker 1: but I think just letting him know that you want

1033
00:55:22,880 --> 00:55:25,920
Speaker 1: to kind of have the best relationship that y'all can

1034
00:55:25,960 --> 00:55:30,200
Speaker 1: have and have the healthy relationship, and um, I've fully

1035
00:55:30,239 --> 00:55:34,080
Speaker 1: support it. So to be honest, like, if that's something

1036
00:55:34,160 --> 00:55:36,399
Speaker 1: that Bianca wants to do, she wants to do having

1037
00:55:36,440 --> 00:55:39,200
Speaker 1: a partner that supports and that obviously means that they

1038
00:55:39,280 --> 00:55:41,800
Speaker 1: want it just as badly. So I think that that's

1039
00:55:42,880 --> 00:55:44,239
Speaker 1: it's a good thing to bring it up and see

1040
00:55:44,239 --> 00:55:47,160
Speaker 1: how he responds. Yeah, I feel like for Exam it's

1041
00:55:47,239 --> 00:55:53,320
Speaker 1: like not, then that's something to consider. It might be

1042
00:55:53,440 --> 00:55:59,040
Speaker 1: a sign. Um, I felt like we gave excellent advice.

1043
00:55:59,160 --> 00:56:01,239
Speaker 1: I don't know if we do anything helpful, but we

1044
00:56:01,400 --> 00:56:03,879
Speaker 1: gave it are all. I really feel like that trying

1045
00:56:03,920 --> 00:56:06,640
Speaker 1: to follow I'm more of a visual reader, like I

1046
00:56:06,760 --> 00:56:09,920
Speaker 1: have to read things to full understand the situation. So

1047
00:56:10,000 --> 00:56:13,160
Speaker 1: I hope it didn't miss anything. But just be you

1048
00:56:17,560 --> 00:56:22,760
Speaker 1: and that that's the final advice. Just be you, be happy.

1049
00:56:24,680 --> 00:56:27,880
Speaker 1: Oh wait, have you? Have you been tempted or has

1050
00:56:27,920 --> 00:56:30,279
Speaker 1: anyone tried to convince you to download the app? Be Real?

1051
00:56:30,719 --> 00:56:33,600
Speaker 1: Have you heard of this? What is that? Okay? So

1052
00:56:33,880 --> 00:56:37,560
Speaker 1: it's just another app where basically you get a notification

1053
00:56:37,880 --> 00:56:41,520
Speaker 1: and it's like like you have to take a picture

1054
00:56:41,680 --> 00:56:45,000
Speaker 1: of whatever you're doing, but it takes a photo of

1055
00:56:45,160 --> 00:56:47,120
Speaker 1: what you're looking at, and then it also snaps a

1056
00:56:47,160 --> 00:56:48,880
Speaker 1: photo of your face, which I did not know the

1057
00:56:48,960 --> 00:56:51,799
Speaker 1: first time, so that was a shocker. What if you're

1058
00:56:51,960 --> 00:56:54,840
Speaker 1: on the toilet, you see you send it? I personally

1059
00:56:55,040 --> 00:56:57,160
Speaker 1: don't get I don't get it. It stresses me out.

1060
00:56:57,160 --> 00:56:59,800
Speaker 1: I get the notification and it gives me anxiety. So

1061
00:57:00,080 --> 00:57:02,759
Speaker 1: I don't find it like enjoyable for me personally. But

1062
00:57:03,680 --> 00:57:05,320
Speaker 1: it just made me laugh. When you said be you,

1063
00:57:05,560 --> 00:57:07,719
Speaker 1: I was gonna say, be real. Yeah, we can just

1064
00:57:07,840 --> 00:57:11,200
Speaker 1: eliminate that from the advice. He did give great advice

1065
00:57:12,000 --> 00:57:15,240
Speaker 1: up until that point, so I think that's great advice.

1066
00:57:15,719 --> 00:57:19,000
Speaker 1: My new motto is if I'm if I want to

1067
00:57:19,120 --> 00:57:22,720
Speaker 1: do something, I'm not gonna not do it because I'm

1068
00:57:22,760 --> 00:57:25,720
Speaker 1: worried about what other people are gonna think. That's great advice,

1069
00:57:25,760 --> 00:57:28,080
Speaker 1: and it's also something that's hard to do, so it's

1070
00:57:28,240 --> 00:57:32,720
Speaker 1: very hard. Yeah. Yeah, you know, we're not We're not

1071
00:57:32,800 --> 00:57:36,000
Speaker 1: good at that. Um, Okay, I love you so much,

1072
00:57:36,080 --> 00:57:39,520
Speaker 1: thanks for scrubbing in. I just loved scrubbing in with you,

1073
00:57:39,800 --> 00:57:42,280
Speaker 1: and I love you, and I love everyone listening, and

1074
00:57:42,440 --> 00:57:45,320
Speaker 1: hopefully I'll be back on a later date. That's right,

1075
00:57:45,440 --> 00:57:49,080
Speaker 1: We'll see you soon, everybody. Um, we love you, buying,

1076
00:57:49,280 --> 00:57:50,080
Speaker 1: love you, buying,