WEBVTT - Second Date Update: Ghosting Karma

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<v Speaker 1>Second DA. There's a lot of theories about how to

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<v Speaker 1>find the one when you're dating, but really, at the

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<v Speaker 1>end of the day, a lot of it just comes

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<v Speaker 1>down to being in the right place at the right time,

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<v Speaker 1>Oh for sure. Yeah, that's why Alexis stands outside the

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<v Speaker 1>yacht club every day after work in her tiniest crop top. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>you just got to increase those odds that it'll happen

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<v Speaker 1>a lost child. I prefer weekends out there. Well, one

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<v Speaker 1>of our listeners thinks he found the right girl, but

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<v Speaker 1>he took her to the wrong place at the wrong time,

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<v Speaker 1>and that's why Brian's reached out to us for help.

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<v Speaker 1>Hey Brian, how you doing, man? I'm good. How are

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<v Speaker 1>you guys doing? It sounds like you're living with some

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<v Speaker 1>regret on your decision making. Yeah you know, I made

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<v Speaker 1>a right turn down the wrong street. Yeah I've done

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<v Speaker 1>that all right. Well, before we get into your actual date,

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<v Speaker 1>why don't you tell us about the girl that you met.

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<v Speaker 1>What's her name? Her name is Alana. We met on

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<v Speaker 1>a dating app and she is smoking hot. I like that.

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<v Speaker 1>We don't even have to ask about her. What makes

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<v Speaker 1>her so smoking hot? She just has the most beautiful

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<v Speaker 1>lips I've ever seen. They like heart shape, they make

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<v Speaker 1>like a little bow in the corner. She just has

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<v Speaker 1>a beautiful mouth. Her lips. It sounds like Betty Boop

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<v Speaker 1>to me. Okay, but IOUs lips. I often complimented on

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<v Speaker 1>my lips. That's good. Ladies, know how you turn that

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<v Speaker 1>into something about you. It's a special skill that Brian.

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<v Speaker 1>Tell us what you and Alana did for your date.

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<v Speaker 1>We went to a sushi restaurant. We both are a

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<v Speaker 1>huge sushi fans. That's that's a sexy meal. It is.

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<v Speaker 1>It's a great date meal. There's things you can explore,

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<v Speaker 1>and you're simple, you always share. I mean, what was

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<v Speaker 1>your first thought when you saw her for the first time?

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh, how beautiful she was. And she was

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<v Speaker 1>super funny, funny, got all it sounds like a dream,

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<v Speaker 1>so really cool. Where did things start to go wrong

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<v Speaker 1>for you? Well? When we sat down at the table,

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<v Speaker 1>we had a great conversation and I peep over my

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<v Speaker 1>left shoulder and two or three tables down was a

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<v Speaker 1>girl that I ghosted maybe two weeks ago. Oh no, dude,

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<v Speaker 1>what are the chances you ghosted her? It's it's already

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<v Speaker 1>awkward if it's like an axe or someone you want

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<v Speaker 1>to date with. But yeah, disappeared on her. I did

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<v Speaker 1>the Houdini. I definitely did the Huini. So what did

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<v Speaker 1>you do in this situation? I wasn't sure what to do?

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<v Speaker 1>You know. I first I thought about changing tables. You

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<v Speaker 1>know what, I'm saying that we're under the air conditioner

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<v Speaker 1>and it's too cold. But that would have made me

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<v Speaker 1>look weak man that can handle his fare and tie.

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<v Speaker 1>He turns to it, and I was like, hey, can

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<v Speaker 1>I borrow your jacket? Actually, so you didn't do that now?

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<v Speaker 1>And then I thought about going over to the girl,

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<v Speaker 1>and it's moving things over and saying low, no, don't

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<v Speaker 1>do that. That could have been dying on my so

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<v Speaker 1>I left that alone. It could have been a situation

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<v Speaker 1>where the two girls would have fought for you. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>you're right. They would have kissed it out. Yeah, they

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<v Speaker 1>would have stabbed each other with shop sticks. Yeah, exactly.

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<v Speaker 1>You would have been the victim. Okay, So what did

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<v Speaker 1>you end up deciding to do? Oh? I get the

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<v Speaker 1>best thing a person can do in that situation. I

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<v Speaker 1>hid behind my menu, okay, and hope she wouldn't notice

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<v Speaker 1>the back of my head. I mean, she was looking

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<v Speaker 1>at the back of you right now. We're like sideway,

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<v Speaker 1>so she could catch my profile. So I kind of

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<v Speaker 1>angled it and I kept my head down and really low.

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<v Speaker 1>That looked really hot. You're worried about the air conditioner

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<v Speaker 1>thing making you look a little wimpy. I don't know

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<v Speaker 1>about this. I mean, what was your date thinking, do

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<v Speaker 1>you think? I mean, did she notice? What did you

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<v Speaker 1>tell her? Yeah, she's been looking at me and asked

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<v Speaker 1>if it was a problem, and I just told her,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, I had a little bit of back and

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<v Speaker 1>neck pain. Oh no, that's exactly what a woman wants

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<v Speaker 1>to hear. You sound like an old man's have to

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<v Speaker 1>be cowering over all the time. I mean, do you

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<v Speaker 1>think you should have just been honest and told her

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<v Speaker 1>what was going on? Absolutely not. Yeah, I mean that

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<v Speaker 1>that's not a good look, Like, Hey, that's the girl

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<v Speaker 1>that I just ghosted one week ago. And next anyway,

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<v Speaker 1>how's your sush? Yeah? I was totally flustered, so I

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<v Speaker 1>tried to focus on conversation. Conversation was offward and uh

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<v Speaker 1>after we ordered, you know, I had to drop the menu.

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<v Speaker 1>I couldn't hold it up all night, And sure enough,

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<v Speaker 1>the girl that I ghosted is looking right at me.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, did she say something to you? Did

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<v Speaker 1>she come over? She didn't have to say anything. Her

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<v Speaker 1>eyeballs were shooting daggers. Look at that. You're not even

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<v Speaker 1>worth the anger. That's not a good side. Okay, how

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<v Speaker 1>did you and a wanna leave things? Well? After we

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<v Speaker 1>finished our meal, I invite her out for dessert and

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<v Speaker 1>she's like, nah, I'm good, but let's stay in touch

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<v Speaker 1>with each other. And I'm like, hey, sure, probably for

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<v Speaker 1>the best because your ex girlfriend works at the ice

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<v Speaker 1>cream shop. So but yeah, okay, And how long has

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<v Speaker 1>it been since you've last spoken with Alana? About a

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<v Speaker 1>week and a half two weeks okay? So, and I mean,

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<v Speaker 1>you're not shocked that she's not returning your call, Like

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<v Speaker 1>she just said, let's keep in touch just to be kind. No,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not surprised. I was rushing the whole time. My

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<v Speaker 1>focus wasn't there. She had to repeat a few couple

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<v Speaker 1>of things she said that totally went up in my head. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>this is looking like we're trying to get a chance

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<v Speaker 1>at redemption, like a second shot for you. Yeah, distractions

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<v Speaker 1>when we call her and if she answers do you

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<v Speaker 1>want to tell her the truth about what happened at

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<v Speaker 1>the restaurant or do you still want to keep it

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<v Speaker 1>a secret? Hell no, don't tell her the truth out

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<v Speaker 1>the whole night. Oh my god, that's what he wants

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<v Speaker 1>to do. In that case, We're gonna play a song,

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<v Speaker 1>we'll come back, we'll call a lot of for you,

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<v Speaker 1>and we'll keep the lie going when you do. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>not lying. I just never told him what's going on

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<v Speaker 1>in your second date update right after. We all know

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<v Speaker 1>that awkward feeling when you run into somebody from your

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<v Speaker 1>past out in public, something that you have a weird

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<v Speaker 1>history with, whether it's an X that you dumped, or

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<v Speaker 1>a former co worker that you fired, or in my case,

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<v Speaker 1>my old pet snake Ralfie, who I tried to free

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<v Speaker 1>into the woods and then three days later ran into

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<v Speaker 1>him at a pet groomer. Awkward. You know how awkward

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<v Speaker 1>it is when a snake is giving you side eye

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<v Speaker 1>while he's getting blow dried. Uncomfortable. That's what happened to

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<v Speaker 1>one of our did I can't and I that, But

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<v Speaker 1>that's what happened to one of our listeners, Brian, when

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<v Speaker 1>he was out on a date at a restaurant and

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<v Speaker 1>the girl that he just ghosted a week before was

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<v Speaker 1>there sitting at the table right next to them. Oh man.

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<v Speaker 1>And so of course that date didn't end very well

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<v Speaker 1>because of all the tention in the air, and Alana

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<v Speaker 1>is not calling him back afterwards. So we're going to

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<v Speaker 1>try and reach out to her and not explain what happened,

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<v Speaker 1>but at least try and smooth things over and give

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<v Speaker 1>him another chance. Never we're holding the lie here, brookew Wait,

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<v Speaker 1>wasn't I never lied to you guys? Right yet we

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<v Speaker 1>admitted Yeah, what really happened? I just think that if

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<v Speaker 1>if you were to tell her like, hey, I'm so sorry,

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<v Speaker 1>I was distracted there was someone that I used to

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<v Speaker 1>go out with in the restaurant. No, no, no, no, okay, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>So what's your what's your reason then, Brian for being

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<v Speaker 1>so weird during dinner, like you were sitting funny, you

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<v Speaker 1>were hiding behind the menu, Like, how do we explain

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<v Speaker 1>that my neck was he was in pain and that's

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<v Speaker 1>why you couldn't concentrate on the date. We can say

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<v Speaker 1>feels better now, that does? That is what a lie is, Brian.

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<v Speaker 1>I just want to establish that that's what I told

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<v Speaker 1>to my pet snake too. When I found him, I

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<v Speaker 1>was like, oh, my Siatica. That's why I had to

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<v Speaker 1>let you go. So all right, man, I feel like

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<v Speaker 1>we're ready to call a Lana. Do you feel ready?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm ready? Alight, let agree with our tactics, but we'll

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<v Speaker 1>do it. Here we go. I'm gonna dial a Lana's

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<v Speaker 1>number right now. Hello, Hi, is this Alana? This is her?

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<v Speaker 1>Who am I speaking with? You're speaking with jeff the

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<v Speaker 1>lead host of the award winning morning radio show Brook

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<v Speaker 1>and Jeffrey in the Morning. That's a lot of hype. Alaa, Okay, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>what HIPI radio morning show? Sorry, that's pretty much yeah, okay, well, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>you're right. We didn't win any awards and not a

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<v Speaker 1>lot of people. So what are you saying? What? I

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<v Speaker 1>just don't You're just kind of like an awkward guy

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<v Speaker 1>with a microphone. Yeah, all right, you're on an awkward

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<v Speaker 1>morning radio show with a super awkward guy. Welcome, Alanna. Okay, Hi,

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<v Speaker 1>what what what is it all about? On this really

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<v Speaker 1>horrible awkward show? We do something called a second date

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<v Speaker 1>update where we help our listeners reconnect with people after

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<v Speaker 1>they've been ghosted. Oh, did my friend Courtney call you?

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<v Speaker 1>What Courtney? I told my friend Courtney about this really

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<v Speaker 1>awkward date I was on like the other week. Did

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<v Speaker 1>you call you about this? Well, we haven't spoken with

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<v Speaker 1>anybody named Courtney, but we did talk to a guy

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<v Speaker 1>named Brian who said that he went out with you

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<v Speaker 1>the other day. Oh wow, okay, yeah, is that the

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<v Speaker 1>star of your awkward date? Yeah? Yeah, front and center,

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<v Speaker 1>that's the guy. Yeah. So we're calling on his behalf

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<v Speaker 1>because he wants to know. Well, well, it's not that

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<v Speaker 1>he wants to know what went wrong. He kind of

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<v Speaker 1>already knows that it wasn't the greatest date on his part.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh okay, Well, I'm glad he knows that. But he

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<v Speaker 1>had a lot of really nice things to say about you.

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<v Speaker 1>He thought that you were just absolutely beautiful and funny.

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<v Speaker 1>He said, you're really funny and you made him laugh,

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<v Speaker 1>which I think is the best compliment. The lips. Oh

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<v Speaker 1>that's right. I don't know if you get a lot

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<v Speaker 1>of compliments on your lips, but he mentioned they were

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<v Speaker 1>very full and voluptuous. Oh that's so sweet. Okay. What

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<v Speaker 1>was your take on Brian, Like, what did you think

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<v Speaker 1>about him in the beginning? Yeah, no, he like he

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<v Speaker 1>just completely like ignored me. He was not focused on

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<v Speaker 1>the date or anything at all. Like I'm amazed that

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<v Speaker 1>he even noticed my lips or anything physical about me.

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<v Speaker 1>He just like was completely distracted. Well, in his defense,

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<v Speaker 1>he mentioned us that he was a little bit nervous

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<v Speaker 1>and that he was dealing with some neck pain during

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<v Speaker 1>the date. Yeah, that's understandable, Like everybody Overage nineteen has

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<v Speaker 1>neck and back pain, or at least that's what Jeff

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<v Speaker 1>tells himself. Yeah, but you know, he was in pain,

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<v Speaker 1>and so maybe that could help explain why he was

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<v Speaker 1>acting a little weird. Oh yeah, he did say that,

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<v Speaker 1>like his neck and his upper back was hurting, and

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, yeah, your neck is probably broken because

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<v Speaker 1>he was checking out this other girl at a table

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<v Speaker 1>like most of the night. Okay, so that's like part

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<v Speaker 1>of it. So you so you noticed him looking at

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<v Speaker 1>someone else? Oh my god? Yeah? Did you ever think

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<v Speaker 1>about calling him on it? I was just like whatever,

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<v Speaker 1>I'll just get through dinner and like call it a night.

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<v Speaker 1>He like wanted to go to dessert. I was like, no,

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<v Speaker 1>live your life. Yeah, are you sure that he was

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<v Speaker 1>checking out another woman? Because he never mentioned anything like

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<v Speaker 1>that to us, really, and he has his neck pain.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe it was just cooked in a certain way where

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<v Speaker 1>he was facing towards a table with a woman at it,

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<v Speaker 1>That's what I was saying. I don't know, Like he

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<v Speaker 1>kept looking like to this side, at this other table

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<v Speaker 1>with two girls sitting at it, and like they were

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<v Speaker 1>cute girls. Sure, but he wasn't even focused on me.

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<v Speaker 1>It was like he was in another world. I had

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<v Speaker 1>to repeat myself over and over. Nickpeen is distracting. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I could see how you'd be really frustrated with him, though,

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<v Speaker 1>could you think of any like reason other than he

0:12:24.840 --> 0:12:28.079
<v Speaker 1>was checking her out that there could be for him.

0:12:30.520 --> 0:12:33.080
<v Speaker 1>I just think that it's a better alternative to than

0:12:33.160 --> 0:12:35.920
<v Speaker 1>what she thinks right now. Yeah, but that's not the

0:12:36.120 --> 0:12:41.920
<v Speaker 1>plan that I think. Yeah, he heard no sounds crazy. Yeah,

0:12:42.000 --> 0:12:43.839
<v Speaker 1>and I wouldn't listen to her. She's like the crazy

0:12:43.920 --> 0:12:45.920
<v Speaker 1>one on the show. She suffers from the most neck

0:12:45.960 --> 0:12:53.240
<v Speaker 1>and back. But maybe there is an explanation for why

0:12:53.320 --> 0:12:57.080
<v Speaker 1>he was behaving so weirdly. And I need to let

0:12:57.120 --> 0:13:00.520
<v Speaker 1>you know that Brian is actually on the other line, Lana,

0:13:00.640 --> 0:13:04.160
<v Speaker 1>and wait what Yeah, right now, he's been listening and

0:13:04.200 --> 0:13:06.000
<v Speaker 1>he feels a lot better today. I feel like his

0:13:06.120 --> 0:13:09.760
<v Speaker 1>neck pain is miraculously gone. Yes, my neck is so

0:13:09.920 --> 0:13:15.880
<v Speaker 1>much better. Hi Alana, um hi Brian, what is this?

0:13:17.960 --> 0:13:20.400
<v Speaker 1>You know? I was wondering if maybe we could do

0:13:20.480 --> 0:13:22.800
<v Speaker 1>like a redo or something like that, and my neck

0:13:22.960 --> 0:13:26.000
<v Speaker 1>waselling me. I mean, sure, I'm glad your neck is

0:13:26.000 --> 0:13:29.040
<v Speaker 1>feeling better, But I also think, like, I don't know,

0:13:29.080 --> 0:13:31.320
<v Speaker 1>if someone just like not a good listener or like

0:13:31.440 --> 0:13:34.440
<v Speaker 1>not willing to pay attention to their date, then I

0:13:34.480 --> 0:13:37.280
<v Speaker 1>don't know why I should give you a second chance.

0:13:37.960 --> 0:13:40.360
<v Speaker 1>I mean, I don't know, is that really what was

0:13:40.440 --> 0:13:46.240
<v Speaker 1>I was in? Oh? Yeah, yeah, Oh come on, Brian, Brian,

0:13:46.360 --> 0:13:49.200
<v Speaker 1>your your friends here on the radio seem to be

0:13:49.400 --> 0:13:52.600
<v Speaker 1>telling another story that maybe there's something else going on. No, no,

0:13:52.720 --> 0:13:58.000
<v Speaker 1>just yeah, yeah, Brook's not a friend of ours. Okay,

0:13:58.040 --> 0:14:04.880
<v Speaker 1>well Brook is my friends. I think the truth isn't

0:14:04.880 --> 0:14:10.120
<v Speaker 1>that bad. I don't know, Brian, you need to tell

0:14:10.160 --> 0:14:12.920
<v Speaker 1>me the truth, Like, what is going on with this date?

0:14:15.040 --> 0:14:17.680
<v Speaker 1>All right? I mean, if we're going to be honest here, Um,

0:14:17.760 --> 0:14:19.920
<v Speaker 1>you know, I don't know if you noticed the girl

0:14:20.080 --> 0:14:24.880
<v Speaker 1>sitting maybe a couple of tables away from us. Um, yeah,

0:14:25.040 --> 0:14:28.520
<v Speaker 1>we went out on a date. Maybe three weeks ago,

0:14:28.760 --> 0:14:31.960
<v Speaker 1>and um, just one date and I never called her back,

0:14:32.040 --> 0:14:34.400
<v Speaker 1>and I wasn't sure how she was going to respond,

0:14:35.000 --> 0:14:37.280
<v Speaker 1>you know, seeing us there at the restaurant, So it

0:14:37.320 --> 0:14:42.320
<v Speaker 1>made me feel a little nervous and awkward. Wow, so

0:14:42.440 --> 0:14:45.800
<v Speaker 1>you were like hiding from this girl that you ghosted

0:14:46.000 --> 0:14:50.960
<v Speaker 1>on our date. I didn't ghost there necessarily, and I

0:14:51.000 --> 0:14:55.320
<v Speaker 1>wasn't I just didn't want to interact with us. Wait, wait, wait,

0:14:55.360 --> 0:14:57.160
<v Speaker 1>don't you think a lot of don't you think that's

0:14:57.240 --> 0:14:59.880
<v Speaker 1>way better than him checking out somebody else while he's

0:15:00.040 --> 0:15:02.720
<v Speaker 1>out with you, Like, yeah, he just didn't want anything

0:15:02.760 --> 0:15:05.760
<v Speaker 1>to ruin his night with you. And you know, dating

0:15:05.880 --> 0:15:08.560
<v Speaker 1>is hard and things happen, people get busy, You go

0:15:08.640 --> 0:15:10.520
<v Speaker 1>out one night, I don't know what kind of person

0:15:10.600 --> 0:15:12.560
<v Speaker 1>just like goes someone like that like that, you just

0:15:12.680 --> 0:15:15.280
<v Speaker 1>don't have the courtesy to be like, Okay, things didn't

0:15:15.320 --> 0:15:19.600
<v Speaker 1>work out, right, Well, I don't work out by not

0:15:19.640 --> 0:15:24.920
<v Speaker 1>calling back, I mean, he is saying silence sometimes can

0:15:24.960 --> 0:15:28.920
<v Speaker 1>be very powerful. Honestly, still the best policy, Brook, it

0:15:29.200 --> 0:15:34.440
<v Speaker 1>is having a lot I come on, now, it all

0:15:34.480 --> 0:15:37.080
<v Speaker 1>makes sense. Now, it all clicks right, Like he was nervous,

0:15:37.080 --> 0:15:38.440
<v Speaker 1>he didn't know what to do he didn't want to

0:15:38.480 --> 0:15:40.920
<v Speaker 1>ruin his night with you. I mean, I appreciate him

0:15:40.960 --> 0:15:44.240
<v Speaker 1>being upfront, right, I appreciate your honesty eventually getting drug

0:15:44.360 --> 0:15:47.600
<v Speaker 1>out of you by these people on the radio. But

0:15:48.040 --> 0:15:50.400
<v Speaker 1>I do think that, like you need to be honest

0:15:50.400 --> 0:15:52.040
<v Speaker 1>with the people that you're dating and say like, hey,

0:15:52.080 --> 0:15:55.320
<v Speaker 1>this didn't work out. And obviously she wasn't that upset

0:15:55.400 --> 0:15:57.520
<v Speaker 1>by it. Else she would have approached the table and

0:15:57.600 --> 0:16:00.480
<v Speaker 1>made a scene or said something, you know, like maybe

0:16:00.520 --> 0:16:03.240
<v Speaker 1>she was actually ghosting him too. I have an idea

0:16:03.280 --> 0:16:05.960
<v Speaker 1>where we can make we can make this right on everybody.

0:16:06.320 --> 0:16:11.160
<v Speaker 1>What if Brian called the other girl back. Now it's

0:16:11.200 --> 0:16:13.120
<v Speaker 1>a little bit late to come clean with her, but

0:16:13.160 --> 0:16:15.840
<v Speaker 1>at least he's doing right by her. That is the

0:16:15.920 --> 0:16:29.760
<v Speaker 1>dumbest thing I ever hear. Okay, all right, I'd say, Brian,

0:16:29.800 --> 0:16:31.520
<v Speaker 1>if I ever see you a se restaurant, I will

0:16:31.520 --> 0:16:39.320
<v Speaker 1>be coming up to your table. Dude. Shoot, wow, thanks

0:16:39.320 --> 0:16:43.480
<v Speaker 1>a lot, Brook for everything you did for me. I

0:16:43.520 --> 0:16:46.320
<v Speaker 1>didn't need this. I mean a lot of ghosted you too.

0:16:46.960 --> 0:16:55.040
<v Speaker 1>Ye too late. I thought we were a friend. Brooke

0:16:55.120 --> 0:16:56.320
<v Speaker 1>and Jeffrey in the morning,