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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam. This is John, the og Storytime

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Speaker 1: podcast host.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, we got some great stories coming up. But

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Speaker 2: before that, we got a teeny two minute break from

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Speaker 2: the sponsors that keep the show propped up like a

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Speaker 2: little house. Oh yeah. I refused to host my husband's

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Speaker 2: friend because he complains about everything.

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Speaker 3: I don't want a little winer at my table.

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Speaker 2: So my husband has this friend, we'll call him Craig.

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Speaker 2: The first time we invited Craig over for a holiday

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Speaker 2: was Thanksgiving a few years ago. He said he wanted

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Speaker 2: to wash his hands before dinner, but he didn't use

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Speaker 2: the bathroom. Instead, he went to the kitchen and proceeded

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Speaker 2: to complain about how the sink was full of dishes

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Speaker 2: and why hadn't I cleaned them yet, despite the fact

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Speaker 2: that I had made an entire Thanksgiving meal, automatically throwing

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Speaker 2: this guy.

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Speaker 1: Into the pit.

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Speaker 2: Yeah for saying you cooked Thanksgiving dinner and you didn't

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Speaker 2: do the dishes yet.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's a pit for me.

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Speaker 1: While washing his hands before dinner.

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Speaker 3: Razy.

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Speaker 2: My husband said he was probably joking and I shouldn't

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Speaker 2: have taken it so personally. By the way, this comes

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Speaker 2: from user agent Sparkles eighty eight and if you want

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Speaker 2: to submit your own stories, go to the r slash

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Speaker 2: Showkayse Storytime subret it. I'm Dakota, Oh, I'm Angie, I'm Carly,

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Speaker 2: and we're here to give good advice. Goofully, but we

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Speaker 2: don't freaking know all the stuff, dude. We just know

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Speaker 2: the things we know, and if you know things we

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Speaker 2: don't know, tell us in the comments, you little goober,

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Speaker 2: and op says. For Easter, my husband invited him again

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Speaker 2: and Craig offered to bring a pie. I told him

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Speaker 2: that I was already planning on making two desserts, carrot

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Speaker 2: cake and cheesecake stuffed strawberries. That sounds awesome, and since

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Speaker 2: my husband and I were trying to lose weight, I

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Speaker 2: really didn't want an extra dessert floating around, so we

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Speaker 2: offered to bring rolls instead. I joked that if he

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Speaker 2: didn't bring King Hawaiian sweet rolls, he wouldn't be allowed inside.

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Speaker 3: So valid.

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Speaker 2: Honestly, those are the roles to have entirely correct. What

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Speaker 2: other roles would you buy? This is a King's Hawaiian

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Speaker 2: Must he.

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Speaker 3: Like homemake them, then I'll allow it. I guess m.

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Speaker 3: I don't think they'll taste as good as the King

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Speaker 3: Hawaiian roles. But I'll appreciate the effort and love let

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Speaker 3: you put into it.

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Speaker 4: You gotta put that King Hawaiian role in it, though,

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Speaker 4: I just.

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Speaker 3: Have a little bit of those on the side.

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Speaker 2: So on Easter, I told him dinner would be served

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Speaker 2: at five. Five o'clock came and no Craig. Five point thirty,

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Speaker 2: still no.

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Speaker 1: Craig, but we decide to eat.

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Speaker 2: Six o'clock, no Craig, and we move on to dessert.

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Speaker 2: Six point thirty, we finished eating and decided to relax

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Speaker 2: in the living room. Seven o'clock Craig finally shows up

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Speaker 2: with his girlfriend and I see he brought King Hawaiian

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Speaker 2: but a roll, not the sweet rolls. Get out of here.

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Speaker 1: Come on classic seven o'clock Craig showing up with the

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Speaker 1: wrong bread.

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Speaker 3: You're so close that right brand, wrong type.

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Speaker 4: He's like, I'm late. I went to every store.

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Speaker 2: At this point, I didn't really care since I already

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Speaker 2: ate dinner without a roll. But what really got me

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Speaker 2: was he brought the pie. So Craig goes to wash

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Speaker 2: his hands and can't help but make a comment about

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Speaker 2: the dishes in my sink. He then complains that my

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Speaker 2: food is nowhere as good as his girlfriends. Probably had

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Speaker 2: something to do with the fact that the food was

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Speaker 2: now cold. When he was ready to leave, I told him,

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Speaker 2: don't forget your pie. He mentioned that he didn't like

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Speaker 2: sweets and we could keep it. Now. Thanksgiving is coming

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Speaker 2: again and my husband wants to invite him. I said, fine,

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Speaker 2: but I'm not dealing with his bes this time. The

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Speaker 2: first condescending comment he makes is that he can walk

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Speaker 2: straight out and if I have to slam the pie

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Speaker 2: in his face to get him to take it, then

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Speaker 2: I will you still have that pie. You've got the

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Speaker 2: same Easter pies just been sitting around.

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Speaker 3: It's just all like dried and crusty, and it'll just

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Speaker 3: crumble if you throw the pie.

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Speaker 2: Give him a concussion. Yea solid b that's a rock

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Speaker 2: At that point, Yeah, my husband is telling me that

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Speaker 2: I'm taking everything out of context, but I think showing

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Speaker 2: up two hours late and being rude to the host

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Speaker 2: is pretty clear.

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Speaker 1: Am I the a hole? And there are some comments.

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Speaker 2: I will say it is crazy that he showed up

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Speaker 2: two hours late and then insulted you. Yes, that's a

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Speaker 2: pretty big demerit. On seven o'clock Craig. But uh, you

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Speaker 2: can't really be mad that he brought pie. You know

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Speaker 2: what I'm saying. He brought the pie in the rolls.

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Speaker 2: Just don't eat the pie.

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Speaker 3: That's nice that he brought the pie. I think that's fine.

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Speaker 3: If you wanted to leave it there, you didn't want it,

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Speaker 3: that's okay to give it away or throw it away.

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Speaker 2: Put the pie outside and let somebody you know, smell

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Speaker 2: it and like float over.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, and then they'll eat it.

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Speaker 3: They'll eat it. But yeah, if you just leave it

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Speaker 3: on the window sill, then you'll be good.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Just make sure it's warm, warm enough with the cartoon

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Speaker 2: smoke to fill off of it and take it that

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Speaker 2: that could slow down the street.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but everything else. Seven o'clock, Craig.

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Speaker 1: Come on, seven o'clock, Craig, what are you doing? Don't

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Speaker 1: be insulting.

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Speaker 2: Have we also talked to seven o'clock Craig and been like, hey,

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Speaker 2: when you crack the wise Guy, you know jokes.

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Speaker 1: Not really a huge fan of those, Craig. Yeah, Craig,

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Speaker 1: But we have some comments COMI. One says you're.

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Speaker 3: Kami.

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Speaker 2: One says you're weirdly sensitive about the pie. But justified

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Speaker 2: in being upset about his comments about your dishes and

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Speaker 2: about your food, and the fact that he was so late.

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Speaker 2: Opie said, if it hadn't been for the other stuff,

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Speaker 2: I probably wouldn't have minded as much, especially since he

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Speaker 2: bought it at a restaurant that has the most artificial

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Speaker 2: tasting chocolate pies I've ever had. And Opie's clarifying on

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Speaker 2: if Craig's girlfriend was even invited to Thanksgiving the first

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Speaker 2: time has Craig been with his girlfriend for a while.

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Speaker 2: Opie says, Craig asked if he could bring her, and

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Speaker 2: we said yes. She was perfectly kind to us. They're

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Speaker 2: actually engaged now, and my husband hasn't known him that long.

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Speaker 2: They used to work together, and I know my husband

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Speaker 2: and his work friends are rude and inappropriate with each other,

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Speaker 2: and I told him that if he wants to act

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Speaker 2: like that with his friends, I don't care, but I

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Speaker 2: don't like people treating me like that. Comment two says,

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Speaker 2: why does your husband keep invite and if they're tight

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Speaker 2: enough to spend all the holidays together, why hasn't he

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Speaker 2: addressed this behavior? Not the a hole your husband borders

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Speaker 2: on it though, and Opie says, to be fair, those

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Speaker 2: are only two holidays in the past four years.

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Speaker 1: That's what I was going to immediately point out.

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Speaker 2: This comment is like he's coming to every holiday.

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Speaker 1: It's like, well, we're talking about the third one.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and yeah, I know it had been four years,

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Speaker 2: but not really every single holiday.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, he's coming over on ourbor day, how.

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Speaker 4: He's a tree and talk like a pirate day.

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Speaker 1: On on seven eleven day.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and he didn't bring us free Slushyes, he.

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Speaker 2: Just brought one for himself. Come on, Opie replies. He

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Speaker 2: usually visits his family, but those two he happened to

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Speaker 2: be in town. Commentator three says, and not the a hole.

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Speaker 2: You have a husband problem. Craig is obviously an a hole,

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Speaker 2: But why is your husband okay with his friend being

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Speaker 2: so rude and nasty to his wife? Does your husband

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Speaker 2: also treat you like this or talk bad about you

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Speaker 2: to Craig so that he feels comfortable and to act

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Speaker 2: this way. The first time, I guess was ever rude

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Speaker 2: to me in my own home would be the last

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Speaker 2: time they would incite it. Tell your husband he can

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Speaker 2: go spend Thanksgiving with Craig and his girlfriend while you

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Speaker 2: stay home alone.

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Speaker 1: I don't think that's a win.

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Speaker 2: Commenter. They don't think that's a win, don't. I don't

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Speaker 2: like this.

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Speaker 1: There will be no less and no a hole making

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Speaker 1: rude comments.

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Speaker 2: I hope, he says. I've seen my husband around his

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Speaker 2: friends and they go all out with the mean comments

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Speaker 2: towards each other. So I get that it's their friend dynamic.

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Speaker 2: My husband says that Craig sees me as a friend

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Speaker 2: and that's why he's comfortable being rude to me, but

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Speaker 2: he isn't trying to actually be mean. I told him

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Speaker 2: I'm not mean to my friends, and he said he'd

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Speaker 2: tell Craig to be nicer, but that he just forgets

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Speaker 2: I'm not like his other friends. Comment for says, ask

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Speaker 2: your husband, what about Craig? Does he actually like all

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Speaker 2: these comments saying this stuff? And it's like we didn't

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Speaker 2: even ever talk to Craig.

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Speaker 1: I don't think.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't think Craig has ever been made aware

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Speaker 2: that he even stepped out of line in any way, right.

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Speaker 3: I think this is the kind of situation where it's like,

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Speaker 3: you know, maybe they just have send me thing because

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Speaker 3: it's like the kind of thing where it's like these

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Speaker 3: are big enough to be really annoying, but small enough

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Speaker 3: to like not be like, Hey, what's the freaking deal, Craig,

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Speaker 3: You know what I mean? So how do you bring

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Speaker 3: up those issues with the friends?

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Speaker 2: It feels like this started with like like the comment

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Speaker 2: about the dishes was like a little splinter, yeah, and

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Speaker 2: then op just like let it was like just having

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Speaker 2: it fester.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, just like and it's been a.

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Speaker 2: Whole year now, and they're like, if Craig says one

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Speaker 2: thing out of line, I'm concussing him with the pie

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Speaker 2: he brought for Easter. Yeah, and I am lighting his

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Speaker 2: car on fire. Let's just start with, Hey, Craig, this

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Speaker 2: is I would prefer to you not to speak to

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Speaker 2: me this way.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I think we need to know how we feel about

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Speaker 3: these things, and then when something comes up again, then

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Speaker 3: we just nip it in the butt right away.

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Speaker 4: Oh.

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Speaker 2: He says. They used to work together, and I know

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Speaker 2: Craig did have my husband's back in a situation where

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Speaker 2: a higher up was trying to get my husband fired

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Speaker 2: over a mistake that was the higher up's fault. Craig

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Speaker 2: sounds like he's not that bad. I do appreciate him

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Speaker 2: being there and defending my husband in that situation, but

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Speaker 2: in my personal life he's annoying, and Comment five says,

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Speaker 2: you're definitely not the ale and a saint for being

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Speaker 2: willing to host him again after his nonsense. But I

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Speaker 2: have to ask, what is your husband doing while you're

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Speaker 2: cooking a huge meal? Because mine is doing the dishes.

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Speaker 2: So we end the night with an almost clean kitchen,

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Speaker 2: plates and serving dishes, but the pots and pans are done.

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Speaker 2: I ask because it sounds like your husband doesn't really

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Speaker 2: respect the work that goes into hosting these things, which

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Speaker 2: usually happens because he doesn't contribute to it. Ope, he says,

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Speaker 2: he typically cleans the house for the guests. We can

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Speaker 2: be a little lazy about it when we don't have company,

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Speaker 2: so it gets messy, and we have dogs so everything

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Speaker 2: needs to be vacuumed. And it's a small kitchen, so

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Speaker 2: if he tried to wash dishes, he would end up

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Speaker 2: being in my way and I'd get even more frustrated.

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Speaker 2: So we always agree to handle dishes after everyone leaves.

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Speaker 2: Comment six says, op, did Craig make the complaint towards

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Speaker 2: you specifically, or towards your husband or the both of you?

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Speaker 2: Because if it's towards you in particular, then that man

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Speaker 2: has a lot of gall to complain after having enjoyed

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Speaker 2: the meal you made twice, I might add in your shoes.

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Speaker 2: If Craig comes to dinner and complains again, I'd hand

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Speaker 2: him some dish gloves and a brush and tell him

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Speaker 2: and Ubby to start cleaning it. If it bothers him

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Speaker 2: so much, you cooked, he can clean. He's been a

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Speaker 2: rude guest so far, and you don't have to tolerate it.

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Speaker 2: And he's not even family. OPI said, he said my name,

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Speaker 2: so it was directed at me. And we have an

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Speaker 2: update and it's uh, post Thanksgiving.

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Speaker 3: Okay, so we find out if Craig said any other

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Speaker 3: little comments.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and I see a comment. Toria Bumgardner says, if

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Speaker 2: Craig was a punk like that, I'd tell Craig to

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Speaker 2: cut the crap. He can talk like that, so can I. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I think that, you know, and Op, he's probably not

245
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Speaker 2: built that way. Ohpi says that's not how they interact

246
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Speaker 2: with their friends. But you know, this is a perfect

247
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Speaker 2: opportunity because you don't like Craig and Craig's not your friend,

248
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Speaker 2: but if you talk to him in a mean way,

249
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Speaker 2: Craig will be like, oh, she's.

250
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Speaker 1: My friend, so it's kind of like a get out

251
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Speaker 1: of jail free card.

252
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Speaker 2: Yeah, you can be as rude as you wrought to

253
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Speaker 2: Craig and he'll be like, oh, OPI Opie's so cool.

254
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Speaker 3: Right right? But might not be the case.

255
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Speaker 2: I mean, like, would you say, Craig, I would just

256
00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:14,360
Speaker 2: be like, hey, yo, hey yo buddy. Oh heyo, hey

257
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Speaker 2: yo buddy.

258
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Speaker 1: You don't like that.

259
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Speaker 3: I got god the messy dishes when you are here

260
00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:24,120
Speaker 3: as a guest, when I cleaned or I cooked for you,

261
00:11:24,320 --> 00:11:27,560
Speaker 3: then maybe you could pitch in and clean them for me,

262
00:11:28,000 --> 00:11:31,960
Speaker 3: just like, Hey, really good observation there. I'm so glad

263
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Speaker 3: you volunteered to clean them up. Yeah, it is a problem.

264
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Speaker 2: You're so right, get to it, Craig, you're so observant.

265
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Speaker 1: Why don't you observe where the scrubby brush and the

266
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Speaker 1: soap is?

267
00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:46,959
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yes, And there's an update. So since Thanksgiving was yesterday,

268
00:11:47,280 --> 00:11:49,920
Speaker 2: I decided to update. But first I want to address

269
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:52,880
Speaker 2: a few things. Craig did ask if he could bring

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Speaker 2: his girlfriend, and we said yes because she's a very

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Speaker 2: sweet person. I just forgot to mention that. And why

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Speaker 2: did I or my husband not call out. Well, I

273
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Speaker 2: am very non confrontational, and my husband and his friends

274
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Speaker 2: roast each other. That's just their dynamic. My friends and

275
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Speaker 2: I borderline flirt with each other, so it's the exact opposite.

276
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Speaker 2: I disagree. I think men bullying each other is flirting.

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Speaker 3: So how you flirt with your men?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Okay.

280
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Speaker 2: That's why I always tell Kean's stinky little goose.

281
00:12:20,720 --> 00:12:22,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, because you want to kiss him?

282
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Speaker 1: Because I'm like, oh, I mean, yeah, I like you.

283
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Speaker 3: I think that all. It's kind of hard to say,

284
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Speaker 3: like what other people should be doing or should not

285
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Speaker 3: be doing. In that sense, it's like, well, you flirt,

286
00:12:33,559 --> 00:12:34,200
Speaker 3: how you flirt?

287
00:12:34,480 --> 00:12:39,800
Speaker 2: That's okay, yeah, friend flirt, friend flirt. It's frendatious flirt,

288
00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:44,079
Speaker 2: Yeah flirt, tenderly friendly flirty.

289
00:12:44,040 --> 00:12:48,760
Speaker 3: Friendlacious friendlacious, frendatious friend, friend.

290
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Speaker 1: We've got all the options covered.

291
00:12:51,640 --> 00:12:55,320
Speaker 2: So when Craig insulted me, it's because he likes me

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Speaker 2: and sees me as a friend. A lot of people

293
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Speaker 2: also seem to think my husband is terrible, and that's

294
00:13:00,080 --> 00:13:01,680
Speaker 2: easy to say when this is the only thing you

295
00:13:01,679 --> 00:13:03,320
Speaker 2: know about him. But let me assure you I could

296
00:13:03,360 --> 00:13:05,760
Speaker 2: not have asked for a better husband. He supported me

297
00:13:05,800 --> 00:13:08,280
Speaker 2: for years while I was unemployed and he didn't complain.

298
00:13:08,640 --> 00:13:10,560
Speaker 2: He's taking care of me while I was sick and

299
00:13:10,640 --> 00:13:13,360
Speaker 2: recovering from surgery. He defended me when his mother called

300
00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:16,360
Speaker 2: me lazy. He likes to surprise me with little presents

301
00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:18,920
Speaker 2: and treats for no reason. And he's more excited about

302
00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:21,720
Speaker 2: my little victories than I am, and is always quick

303
00:13:21,720 --> 00:13:24,800
Speaker 2: to remind me how amazing he thinks I am. Whenever

304
00:13:24,840 --> 00:13:27,960
Speaker 2: I try to say something negative about myself, He's silly

305
00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:30,760
Speaker 2: and he makes me laugh. He's so amazing that I'm

306
00:13:30,760 --> 00:13:33,800
Speaker 2: willing to put up with his lukewarm friends. Several people

307
00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:35,920
Speaker 2: have also mentioned that I should go out to eat,

308
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Speaker 2: and as a person who used to serve on Thanksgiving,

309
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Speaker 2: that sounds horrible. You know, we've got a little bit

310
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Speaker 2: more me personally. I'm you know, I'm in the free

311
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Speaker 2: Craig camp. Okay, free Craig dude, Yeah, okay. Op already

312
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Speaker 2: said that they're very non confrontational. So it's like, you

313
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Speaker 2: can't expect somebody to change or like not adopt, But like,

314
00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:03,880
Speaker 2: what's the what am I trying to adapt?

315
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Speaker 1: You can't expect somebody to adapt to.

316
00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:11,080
Speaker 2: Your way of being or communicating if you never say anything.

317
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Speaker 3: I have to agree with that.

318
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Speaker 2: You know, and like, yeah, it's absolutely unhinged for him

319
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Speaker 2: to show up on during that Easter dinner or Easter

320
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Speaker 2: brunch whatever, Yeah, I guess it was dinner and be like,

321
00:14:25,160 --> 00:14:26,360
Speaker 2: oh yeah, the food, like.

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00:14:26,320 --> 00:14:28,920
Speaker 1: You can't you can't insult the food even I mean

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Speaker 1: that's you know.

324
00:14:30,200 --> 00:14:34,040
Speaker 3: I mean everything for you guys. Maybe not the pie,

325
00:14:34,120 --> 00:14:34,880
Speaker 3: but still.

326
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Speaker 1: He even said he's like, my girlfriend makes better for

327
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Speaker 1: If I.

328
00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:39,960
Speaker 2: Was his girlfriend, I'd be like, don't, don't mention, don't

329
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Speaker 2: bring me into this.

330
00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:45,440
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, so I maybe free Craig until OPI, you

331
00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:47,280
Speaker 3: stand up for yourself and you speak your mind.

332
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Speaker 1: You gotta go to Craig.

333
00:14:48,280 --> 00:14:50,480
Speaker 2: You gotta go, hey, Craig, come here. I don't want

334
00:14:50,480 --> 00:14:53,120
Speaker 2: to be weird, but I don't like you ras in me. Yeah,

335
00:14:53,160 --> 00:14:55,040
Speaker 2: you know, can we just can we can we just

336
00:14:55,120 --> 00:14:57,680
Speaker 2: be more you know, polite?

337
00:14:58,040 --> 00:14:58,520
Speaker 3: Yeah?

338
00:14:58,640 --> 00:15:02,440
Speaker 1: And Craig goes, oh, dude, yeah, one hundred percent. Here

339
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Speaker 1: you go, and then it's over.

340
00:15:04,080 --> 00:15:07,080
Speaker 3: Take notes, OPI, word for words, say that exactly.

341
00:15:07,280 --> 00:15:09,240
Speaker 1: And then if he calls you a little stinky doodo baby,

342
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Speaker 1: then he's the a hole.

343
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Speaker 3: Yeah.

344
00:15:11,800 --> 00:15:15,640
Speaker 2: Anyway, As it turns out, my husband didn't invite Craig

345
00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:18,360
Speaker 2: after my initial response, he decided not to stress me

346
00:15:18,360 --> 00:15:21,360
Speaker 2: out anymore than I already was. He did invite some

347
00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:23,240
Speaker 2: guys from work who had nowhere else to go, and

348
00:15:23,280 --> 00:15:26,640
Speaker 2: I invited my uncle and cousin. Everyone was an hour late,

349
00:15:26,680 --> 00:15:29,960
Speaker 2: which is la on time, but since the food was

350
00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:32,080
Speaker 2: still hot and I was vibing to my music, I

351
00:15:32,120 --> 00:15:34,720
Speaker 2: didn't mind much. The food was mostly good and no

352
00:15:34,720 --> 00:15:37,200
Speaker 2: one insulted me, even though the turkey was a little dry.

353
00:15:37,360 --> 00:15:39,440
Speaker 2: Don't worry. I know what I did wrong.

354
00:15:39,760 --> 00:15:41,800
Speaker 1: You didn't put it in a bag. You got to

355
00:15:41,840 --> 00:15:43,040
Speaker 1: put that turkey in a bag.

356
00:15:43,280 --> 00:15:44,880
Speaker 3: Put it in a bag, turkey bag.

357
00:15:45,040 --> 00:15:47,040
Speaker 1: Put that turkey in a turkey bag, turkey bag.

358
00:15:47,520 --> 00:15:50,280
Speaker 2: And I had a good time gossiping with my cousin

359
00:15:50,280 --> 00:15:52,960
Speaker 2: while the guys watched football. And there are some more

360
00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:56,560
Speaker 2: comments here asking what op did wrong with that turkey.

361
00:15:56,760 --> 00:15:59,560
Speaker 2: Opie says, well, typically I use a Reynolds bag to

362
00:15:59,600 --> 00:16:02,160
Speaker 2: cook it. You didn't put it in the bag.

363
00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:05,320
Speaker 3: Well you didn't. It sounds like they did put it

364
00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:05,800
Speaker 3: in the bag.

365
00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:06,440
Speaker 2: Oh they didn't.

366
00:16:06,640 --> 00:16:10,440
Speaker 3: It Runolds back to cooking it typically, Oh Ahi, missed

367
00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:11,720
Speaker 3: that one important word.

368
00:16:12,280 --> 00:16:14,760
Speaker 2: Oh pie continues, I know it sounds crazy to cook

369
00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:18,320
Speaker 2: a turkey in a plastic bag, but trust me, it works.

370
00:16:18,760 --> 00:16:22,320
Speaker 2: It keeps the turkey moist so you don't have to

371
00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:25,480
Speaker 2: keep basting. I used the bag, but I heard you

372
00:16:25,480 --> 00:16:28,120
Speaker 2: should cut ventilation holes so the bag won't pop.

373
00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:31,080
Speaker 1: I think I cut too many holes, or my.

374
00:16:31,040 --> 00:16:34,360
Speaker 2: Holes were too big, which allowed too much moisture to escape.

375
00:16:34,560 --> 00:16:37,520
Speaker 2: So next time I'll just stick with two small holes.

376
00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:39,520
Speaker 2: I hate it when my holes are too big. Man

377
00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:44,800
Speaker 2: No comment Comment one says great outcome, I'm not sticking

378
00:16:44,840 --> 00:16:47,520
Speaker 2: around for the Brian police, and comment too says it's

379
00:16:47,520 --> 00:16:49,400
Speaker 2: still rude to show up an hour late, but I'm

380
00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:51,280
Speaker 2: glad you had a great time and that's the end.

381
00:16:51,400 --> 00:16:54,280
Speaker 3: Well, okay, dude, I mean, yeah.

382
00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:57,960
Speaker 2: Free my dog, Craig. Come on, free my dog Craig.

383
00:16:58,360 --> 00:17:01,960
Speaker 2: Craig who made your husban and not get fired. Yeah,

384
00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:05,240
Speaker 2: Craig who had your husband's back when he was we

385
00:17:05,320 --> 00:17:06,160
Speaker 2: had a target on.

386
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:10,080
Speaker 3: It, right. I mean, that's pretty neat if you ask me.

387
00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:13,160
Speaker 3: But uh, I mean it sounds like you guys, you're

388
00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:16,080
Speaker 3: getting to your solution kind of.

389
00:17:16,200 --> 00:17:17,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know. I don't I don't like any

390
00:17:17,760 --> 00:17:17,960
Speaker 2: of that.

391
00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:19,560
Speaker 1: I don't like any dude.

392
00:17:19,760 --> 00:17:22,280
Speaker 2: Your husband was like, yeah, we'll just like ignore him

393
00:17:22,320 --> 00:17:25,200
Speaker 2: and remove his existence, even though I guess whatever, maybe

394
00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:27,080
Speaker 2: he's not maybe your husband's not that big of a friend

395
00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:29,440
Speaker 2: with him. But come on, we can't just be non

396
00:17:29,440 --> 00:17:32,359
Speaker 2: confrontational forever. We have to be able to just like

397
00:17:32,760 --> 00:17:35,800
Speaker 2: have a conflict that's not even a big conflict, that's

398
00:17:35,840 --> 00:17:39,480
Speaker 2: just like maybe twenty four seconds of uncomfortable conversation.

399
00:17:39,920 --> 00:17:42,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, this is definitely not like friendship ending over.

400
00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:44,520
Speaker 1: No, it shouldn't be.

401
00:17:45,119 --> 00:17:47,960
Speaker 3: Especially, I mean if you're non confrontational too, Like I

402
00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:50,359
Speaker 3: don't know, I mean, I guess if you don't like

403
00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:52,760
Speaker 3: what someone's doing, you don't like how they're acting, then like, sure,

404
00:17:52,800 --> 00:17:54,320
Speaker 3: you just don't have to be friends with them again.

405
00:17:54,359 --> 00:17:56,399
Speaker 3: But if it's not your friend, it's your husband's friend

406
00:17:56,560 --> 00:18:00,160
Speaker 3: or fiance husband or whatever, husband, Yeah, your husband's friend,

407
00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:02,960
Speaker 3: and then like that's for just deal with it or

408
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:06,920
Speaker 3: confront it work. I feel like you shouldn't be like, oh,

409
00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:09,080
Speaker 3: there's a problem happening and I'm complaining and I don't

410
00:18:09,160 --> 00:18:11,240
Speaker 3: like it. By the way, I'm non confrontational and I'm

411
00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:12,120
Speaker 3: not going to fix that.

412
00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:13,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what I mean, It just makes you

413
00:18:13,760 --> 00:18:16,320
Speaker 1: see you see about it.

414
00:18:16,359 --> 00:18:19,800
Speaker 2: So now instead of being uncomfortable for one brief moment

415
00:18:19,800 --> 00:18:25,480
Speaker 2: of conversation, you are constantly making yourself uncomfortable reliving and

416
00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:30,680
Speaker 2: re experiencing this like one moment of like you know, friction,

417
00:18:31,400 --> 00:18:33,400
Speaker 2: and every time you think about it, you just get

418
00:18:33,440 --> 00:18:36,920
Speaker 2: a little more like annoyed by it and exactly kind

419
00:18:36,960 --> 00:18:38,800
Speaker 2: of your fault at that point.

420
00:18:39,040 --> 00:18:41,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, like if you're self aware enough to

421
00:18:41,560 --> 00:18:44,960
Speaker 3: know that you are non confrontational when you're talking about

422
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:48,040
Speaker 3: of conflict, then like I feel like we should be

423
00:18:48,960 --> 00:18:52,359
Speaker 3: aware enough to actively work on it. This is a

424
00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:56,640
Speaker 3: great opportunity to adjust that behavior in ourselves.

425
00:18:56,800 --> 00:18:57,000
Speaker 4: You know.

426
00:18:57,119 --> 00:18:59,800
Speaker 2: It's like being like, yeah, like I have a broken arm,

427
00:18:59,840 --> 00:19:02,360
Speaker 2: but but I'm not gonna do anything about it. It's like, well,

428
00:19:02,359 --> 00:19:05,320
Speaker 2: in your arm's gonna be all wonky and messed up. Yeah,

429
00:19:05,359 --> 00:19:08,399
Speaker 2: you know you're non confrontational. You gotta work on doing

430
00:19:08,520 --> 00:19:11,080
Speaker 2: some level of confrontation. This was like easy mode too.

431
00:19:11,640 --> 00:19:14,399
Speaker 2: This was like stage one, like, hey, I'd prefer if

432
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:15,720
Speaker 2: you didn't speak to me that way.

433
00:19:16,040 --> 00:19:19,000
Speaker 1: Right, Oh, now, I know now the boundary has been set.

434
00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:21,920
Speaker 2: Now if he crosses it all right, Craig, we're having

435
00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:24,919
Speaker 2: problems now. Yeah. Anyway, that's a lot of talk for

436
00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:27,760
Speaker 2: seven o'clock, Craig. Let's let's put him in the past.

437
00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:29,240
Speaker 2: He got another story.

438
00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:32,160
Speaker 3: We sure knew. I told my wife I would lose

439
00:19:32,240 --> 00:19:35,200
Speaker 3: respect for her if she refused to apologize.

440
00:19:35,520 --> 00:19:36,680
Speaker 2: Well, maybe she doesn't care.

441
00:19:37,320 --> 00:19:39,960
Speaker 3: My wife and I have three kids. Thursday, my wife

442
00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:42,800
Speaker 3: was helping our nine year old with her homework. She

443
00:19:42,880 --> 00:19:45,520
Speaker 3: was supposed to fill in and chart with the times tables.

444
00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:47,920
Speaker 3: That was a hectic day.

445
00:19:48,119 --> 00:19:54,240
Speaker 2: Bro the timetable. No, no, we can't call helping nine

446
00:19:54,320 --> 00:19:57,880
Speaker 2: year old homework nine year old timetable math homework.

447
00:19:58,200 --> 00:19:59,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's too.

448
00:19:59,119 --> 00:20:03,640
Speaker 2: Easy, Yes, steeezy man one times two two, get mad

449
00:20:03,720 --> 00:20:05,080
Speaker 2: one times three three.

450
00:20:05,680 --> 00:20:07,760
Speaker 4: No, that sounds like it's coming from someone that never

451
00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:11,200
Speaker 4: sat at the kitchen table with their dad over that rye.

452
00:20:12,560 --> 00:20:15,520
Speaker 2: I did not. I was too smart. But I was

453
00:20:15,560 --> 00:20:16,119
Speaker 2: too smart.

454
00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:18,239
Speaker 4: Bugs get out of here.

455
00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:22,720
Speaker 3: Then our four year old threw up and I was

456
00:20:22,760 --> 00:20:24,840
Speaker 3: trying to clean him up, while my wife was having

457
00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:27,040
Speaker 3: trouble getting our nine year old focus on what she

458
00:20:27,240 --> 00:20:30,040
Speaker 3: was doing because she kept looking at me. Our nine

459
00:20:30,080 --> 00:20:32,040
Speaker 3: year old hates math and it's pretty bad at it,

460
00:20:32,080 --> 00:20:35,160
Speaker 3: which annoys my wife, who is usually fantastic with math.

461
00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:37,959
Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from throwaway five seven four

462
00:20:38,040 --> 00:20:39,720
Speaker 3: or five eight four. And if you want to submit

463
00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:42,080
Speaker 3: your own stories, go to the r slash Okay storytime

464
00:20:42,119 --> 00:20:43,360
Speaker 3: separated it and I'm.

465
00:20:43,119 --> 00:20:44,840
Speaker 1: Angie, I'm Dakota.

466
00:20:44,520 --> 00:20:47,200
Speaker 3: I'm Carly, and we're here to give good advice goofily.

467
00:20:47,359 --> 00:20:49,359
Speaker 3: But we don't have all the answers. We just know

468
00:20:49,359 --> 00:20:51,399
Speaker 3: what we were doing these situations. So let us know

469
00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:55,720
Speaker 3: what you do in the comments. Yeah, and Opie says.

470
00:20:56,400 --> 00:20:59,480
Speaker 3: My wife asked our daughter what seven times seven was quick?

471
00:20:59,560 --> 00:21:01,080
Speaker 1: Dkota forty nine?

472
00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:04,960
Speaker 3: Nice? Is it fregnant? Or forty two? What's forty two?

473
00:21:05,440 --> 00:21:06,800
Speaker 3: Put it in the comments below.

474
00:21:07,119 --> 00:21:09,240
Speaker 1: It's two times.

475
00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:11,760
Speaker 3: It could be a lot of things. Huh, forty two

476
00:21:11,880 --> 00:21:15,760
Speaker 3: is not it's six notes, it's six times seven. It's

477
00:21:15,840 --> 00:21:23,439
Speaker 3: just thirty nine minus seven whoa. Our daughter said she

478
00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:26,240
Speaker 3: didn't know. My wife kept telling her to try to

479
00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:29,959
Speaker 3: think of any answer. She kept saying she didn't know.

480
00:21:30,320 --> 00:21:34,720
Speaker 3: My wife was getting frustrated. Our daughter finally guessed thirty seven.

481
00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:40,359
Speaker 3: My wife said close forty seven. Our thirteen year old

482
00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:44,520
Speaker 3: then said, no, mom, it's forty nine. My wife snapped

483
00:21:44,520 --> 00:21:46,639
Speaker 3: at that point and told him to shut up and

484
00:21:46,680 --> 00:21:50,080
Speaker 3: go upstairs. Okay, mom, can't be doing that.

485
00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:54,800
Speaker 2: All right, dude, Sorry, you were not told out. Sorry,

486
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:56,600
Speaker 2: you are not smarter than a fifth grader.

487
00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:59,320
Speaker 3: You're teaching your child the wrong math. Your other child

488
00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:00,640
Speaker 3: is simply helping out.

489
00:22:00,920 --> 00:22:01,200
Speaker 2: Sorry.

490
00:22:01,240 --> 00:22:01,480
Speaker 1: Girl.

491
00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:04,520
Speaker 3: He went into the backyard instead. She took a deep

492
00:22:04,520 --> 00:22:07,359
Speaker 3: breath and then went into our room. I finished with

493
00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:10,840
Speaker 3: our four year old and then went outside. Wait, this

494
00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:13,760
Speaker 3: is a four year old doing the timestables? Is that right?

495
00:22:13,920 --> 00:22:14,120
Speaker 2: Nine?

496
00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:18,200
Speaker 3: Okayne? Never mind, four year old frew up. Okay, they're

497
00:22:18,240 --> 00:22:21,240
Speaker 3: cleaning up. That's okay. Keeping track of all the kids.

498
00:22:21,359 --> 00:22:23,280
Speaker 1: Oh my god, my mom just did six to seven.

499
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:27,359
Speaker 2: My mom just did a six to seven comment. Oh wow, guys,

500
00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:30,639
Speaker 2: ah wow, it's officially the end of the world.

501
00:22:33,080 --> 00:22:37,720
Speaker 3: I guess, so, I guess it is. Man. I tried

502
00:22:37,760 --> 00:22:39,480
Speaker 3: to talk to him, but he didn't want to listen.

503
00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:43,280
Speaker 3: He kept saying, but dad, seven times seven is forty nine.

504
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:46,240
Speaker 3: I told him his mom just got frustrated and didn't

505
00:22:46,280 --> 00:22:48,720
Speaker 3: mean to yell at him. He kept insisting that seven

506
00:22:48,800 --> 00:22:51,239
Speaker 3: times seven is forty nine, which I'm aware of, So

507
00:22:51,320 --> 00:22:52,040
Speaker 3: I got nowhere.

508
00:22:52,200 --> 00:22:53,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, what do you mean you got nowhere?

509
00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:54,080
Speaker 4: You go?

510
00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:56,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're right, it's forty nine. Your mom was wrong.

511
00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:58,280
Speaker 2: She yelled at you. Yes, she didn't like being wrong,

512
00:22:58,359 --> 00:23:00,520
Speaker 2: but she's a person. It's okay, let it go.

513
00:23:00,960 --> 00:23:03,040
Speaker 3: I went back inside to talk to my wife. She

514
00:23:03,119 --> 00:23:05,679
Speaker 3: said she knew she shouldn't have yelled. She said she

515
00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:08,680
Speaker 3: was frustrated because he was distracting her, and that's why

516
00:23:08,720 --> 00:23:11,280
Speaker 3: she made the mistake. I pointed out that she made

517
00:23:11,280 --> 00:23:15,040
Speaker 3: the mistake before he said anything. Oh, and then she's

518
00:23:15,080 --> 00:23:17,119
Speaker 3: gonna she's gonna say, shut up, go upstairs.

519
00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:21,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, shut up, you stop saying anything.

520
00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:23,560
Speaker 3: It was you, and then it's Opie and the thirteen

521
00:23:23,640 --> 00:23:25,000
Speaker 3: year old just brooding outside.

522
00:23:25,680 --> 00:23:28,520
Speaker 4: That is probably not the time to bring more like.

523
00:23:29,200 --> 00:23:33,440
Speaker 3: Actually, she started crying and asked why I was being

524
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:36,520
Speaker 3: so critical. I apologized and told her I loved her.

525
00:23:36,680 --> 00:23:38,679
Speaker 3: We hugged it out. But then I asked her if

526
00:23:38,720 --> 00:23:40,960
Speaker 3: she was going to go apologize to our thirteen year old.

527
00:23:41,160 --> 00:23:43,880
Speaker 3: She said no, because he shouldn't have interrupted her.

528
00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:47,479
Speaker 2: Girl, he interrupted you with the right answer, Yeah, he

529
00:23:47,520 --> 00:23:49,159
Speaker 2: interrupted you because you were being wrong.

530
00:23:49,359 --> 00:23:52,240
Speaker 3: You're wrong. Like, I feel like this is she's just

531
00:23:52,320 --> 00:23:55,360
Speaker 3: blaming everyone else. She's still not accepting that she's done

532
00:23:55,440 --> 00:23:57,160
Speaker 3: anything wrong except for yelling.

533
00:23:57,160 --> 00:24:00,000
Speaker 2: And she started crying, saying, what are you being so critical?

534
00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:02,919
Speaker 2: It's like, oh, uh, yeah, because you screamed at our

535
00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:05,920
Speaker 2: son for knowing what seven times seven is? Yeah, and

536
00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:09,800
Speaker 2: then like left and went to your room, right.

537
00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:12,200
Speaker 4: Like do you want our nine year old to not

538
00:24:12,440 --> 00:24:13,360
Speaker 4: know math? Right?

539
00:24:13,760 --> 00:24:13,960
Speaker 2: Right?

540
00:24:14,480 --> 00:24:17,200
Speaker 3: Come on? She said he was rude and needed to

541
00:24:17,280 --> 00:24:20,520
Speaker 3: learn not to interrupt. I told her it's not okay

542
00:24:20,560 --> 00:24:23,000
Speaker 3: to tell them to shut up. We went back and forth,

543
00:24:23,040 --> 00:24:24,720
Speaker 3: and I finally said that I won't be able to

544
00:24:24,760 --> 00:24:27,720
Speaker 3: respect her as much if she doesn't apologize. That really

545
00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:30,840
Speaker 3: hurt her. She said she needed space. She hasn't said

546
00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:34,480
Speaker 3: a word to me or him since Thursday. I know

547
00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:38,159
Speaker 3: that what I said is harsh, but I can't respect

548
00:24:38,240 --> 00:24:40,680
Speaker 3: someone who won't apologize when they made a mistake. Am

549
00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:41,440
Speaker 3: I the a hole?

550
00:24:41,920 --> 00:24:46,679
Speaker 2: No, dude, your wife just sounds way too competitive, Like, yeah,

551
00:24:46,840 --> 00:24:49,359
Speaker 2: I don't know is that with that or what is

552
00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:50,560
Speaker 2: the emotion attached to this?

553
00:24:50,600 --> 00:24:54,639
Speaker 1: Because she's given you this silent treatment over being off by.

554
00:24:54,480 --> 00:24:57,600
Speaker 2: Two digits really just because you're like, dude, you yelled

555
00:24:57,640 --> 00:25:00,320
Speaker 2: at our son, right, just go say so already.

556
00:25:00,320 --> 00:25:01,359
Speaker 1: I shouldn't have yelled at you.

557
00:25:01,359 --> 00:25:04,400
Speaker 2: You were right, but you know, I got overwhelmed because

558
00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:06,800
Speaker 2: I was working with your sister. She yeah at it,

559
00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:08,720
Speaker 2: and then I was wrong, and then you were right,

560
00:25:08,760 --> 00:25:10,320
Speaker 2: and I wigged out.

561
00:25:10,840 --> 00:25:13,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, hope, he does say. My sister says that I

562
00:25:13,359 --> 00:25:15,480
Speaker 3: am the a hole because I'm not being supportive and

563
00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:17,800
Speaker 3: our thirteen year old is a lot. We do have

564
00:25:17,800 --> 00:25:20,679
Speaker 3: an update, but yeah, No, I don't think you're the

565
00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:22,440
Speaker 3: a hole. I mean, maybe it was a little far,

566
00:25:22,680 --> 00:25:24,560
Speaker 3: but I kind of get that, Like if you were,

567
00:25:25,040 --> 00:25:27,840
Speaker 3: if she's really not letting up on this, maybe another

568
00:25:27,880 --> 00:25:29,760
Speaker 3: thing that you could have done is just like leave

569
00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:33,200
Speaker 3: it alone and come back to it well when emotions

570
00:25:33,240 --> 00:25:35,719
Speaker 3: aren't so high. Because this is right after everything happened.

571
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:37,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean you the only person who knows your

572
00:25:38,320 --> 00:25:40,520
Speaker 2: wife's emotional temperance is you.

573
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:42,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, but I gotta agree.

574
00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:46,200
Speaker 2: I would also lose respect if it's like I have

575
00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:50,119
Speaker 2: to like do a debate with you about apologizing to

576
00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:55,000
Speaker 2: our son. You yelled at yeah for no good reason. Yeah,

577
00:25:55,080 --> 00:25:57,680
Speaker 2: and you're like being like, well no, he interrupted me.

578
00:25:57,800 --> 00:26:01,720
Speaker 2: It's like, well, okay, he didn't he interjected, because you

579
00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:05,280
Speaker 2: were incorrect. Yeah, and then you yelled at him and

580
00:26:05,280 --> 00:26:07,040
Speaker 2: said to go outside. So if you can't swallow your

581
00:26:07,040 --> 00:26:11,040
Speaker 2: pride to apologize to our own child, I will be like, wow,

582
00:26:11,240 --> 00:26:13,920
Speaker 2: that's I yeah, respect you less.

583
00:26:14,119 --> 00:26:17,240
Speaker 3: Like you can be excused because like it's a stressful day,

584
00:26:17,359 --> 00:26:20,120
Speaker 3: stressful time, A lot of stuff is happening, and it's

585
00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:23,879
Speaker 3: understandable to like snap and be like ah, just ah,

586
00:26:23,960 --> 00:26:26,119
Speaker 3: I don't know how to do a throw up at

587
00:26:26,160 --> 00:26:28,880
Speaker 3: thirty seven and forty seven and forty nine too many

588
00:26:28,960 --> 00:26:32,880
Speaker 3: numbers in my head. That's okay, but but yeah, just

589
00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:33,640
Speaker 3: just admit it.

590
00:26:34,040 --> 00:26:40,359
Speaker 2: Two forty seven, forty nine, Yeah, exactly, it's just.

591
00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:42,040
Speaker 1: Up and go outside. Right.

592
00:26:43,280 --> 00:26:46,720
Speaker 3: But I don't know, I mean, maybe you didn't just

593
00:26:46,760 --> 00:26:49,119
Speaker 3: say that you would respect her less. Maybe that's a

594
00:26:49,119 --> 00:26:49,680
Speaker 3: little much.

595
00:26:50,359 --> 00:26:53,480
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like I'm one hundred percent on the train of like,

596
00:26:53,920 --> 00:26:56,480
Speaker 4: definitely apologize to your kids when you've been mean and

597
00:26:56,520 --> 00:26:59,119
Speaker 4: you're wrong, Like, yeah, you should apologize to them totally.

598
00:26:59,200 --> 00:27:01,520
Speaker 4: But maybe you should have let your wife cool off

599
00:27:01,600 --> 00:27:05,719
Speaker 4: before you were Like, actually you were wrong before he

600
00:27:05,760 --> 00:27:09,280
Speaker 4: called you out, and I respect you so much less.

601
00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:11,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think we maybe could have just worded it

602
00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:14,520
Speaker 3: a little differently, but we do have an update. My

603
00:27:14,600 --> 00:27:17,680
Speaker 3: wife got up before our alarm and started cleaning our bathroom.

604
00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:20,200
Speaker 3: I started the laundry and made breakfast. She didn't say

605
00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:22,320
Speaker 3: a word when she sat down to eat. She ate

606
00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:25,119
Speaker 3: much faster than normal. She stood up, picked up our

607
00:27:25,160 --> 00:27:26,960
Speaker 3: four year old, and told her nine year old to

608
00:27:26,960 --> 00:27:29,320
Speaker 3: get ready because they were going to the library. She

609
00:27:29,359 --> 00:27:33,320
Speaker 3: didn't say anything to our thirteen year old. Mom, Mom,

610
00:27:33,359 --> 00:27:36,479
Speaker 3: what you doing day? Well, you can ignore your thirteen

611
00:27:36,520 --> 00:27:38,000
Speaker 3: year old now come on.

612
00:27:38,480 --> 00:27:41,800
Speaker 2: In the classic power play move, she's shutting down. She's

613
00:27:41,920 --> 00:27:45,120
Speaker 2: doing the silent treatment, and she's trying to build things

614
00:27:45,200 --> 00:27:47,199
Speaker 2: up to the point where OP will go, Okay, no,

615
00:27:47,359 --> 00:27:49,480
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, I was wrong, I'm sorry, You're everything.

616
00:27:49,720 --> 00:27:51,760
Speaker 1: Please please, I'm sorry.

617
00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:53,199
Speaker 2: Right, that's what she's trying to do.

618
00:27:53,840 --> 00:27:58,639
Speaker 1: If you know me, I hate that more than anything.

619
00:27:58,960 --> 00:28:02,199
Speaker 3: Understand up. I told her we need to talk, and

620
00:28:02,280 --> 00:28:05,200
Speaker 3: she shook her head. I followed her upstairs and insisted

621
00:28:05,320 --> 00:28:08,720
Speaker 3: that we needed to talk. She just kept shaking her head.

622
00:28:08,880 --> 00:28:11,119
Speaker 3: She went into our four year old's room and locked

623
00:28:11,160 --> 00:28:14,040
Speaker 3: the door. I went downstairs and told her at thirteen

624
00:28:14,119 --> 00:28:15,960
Speaker 3: and nine year old, that we are going to the

625
00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:18,399
Speaker 3: dog park. They both asked if Mom was okay, and

626
00:28:18,440 --> 00:28:21,159
Speaker 3: I said yes, and that she needed space. I grabbed

627
00:28:21,160 --> 00:28:23,240
Speaker 3: some clothes for our nine year old from the laundry

628
00:28:23,320 --> 00:28:25,960
Speaker 3: room and she changed in the downstairs bathroom. We are

629
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:28,040
Speaker 3: at the dog park and my wife is refusing to

630
00:28:28,040 --> 00:28:31,200
Speaker 3: answer my texts. I'm starting to think that this isn't

631
00:28:31,240 --> 00:28:32,200
Speaker 3: about math.

632
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:36,800
Speaker 2: I mean, it couldn't be right, I hope not.

633
00:28:39,080 --> 00:28:41,080
Speaker 4: Dare you ignore your thirteen year old though?

634
00:28:41,200 --> 00:28:44,600
Speaker 3: That's so upsetting when you need to apologize him for

635
00:28:44,680 --> 00:28:46,520
Speaker 3: yelling at him, Like the least you could do is

636
00:28:46,600 --> 00:28:50,360
Speaker 3: just not make things worse. But here you are doing that.

637
00:28:50,840 --> 00:28:52,720
Speaker 3: And we do have some comments here and a lot

638
00:28:52,760 --> 00:28:56,800
Speaker 3: more to this story. Burrito Bowl g Walk says she

639
00:28:56,920 --> 00:28:59,360
Speaker 3: hasn't spoken to her son in three days, and she

640
00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:03,200
Speaker 3: was in the raw ouch Beautiful Monster says, I just

641
00:29:03,280 --> 00:29:04,560
Speaker 3: realized it's been three days.

642
00:29:04,600 --> 00:29:05,080
Speaker 2: What the heck?

643
00:29:05,160 --> 00:29:09,200
Speaker 3: That's even worse, Optimist Prime says, true, now she has

644
00:29:09,240 --> 00:29:12,800
Speaker 3: way more to apologize for future, Stan says, and way

645
00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:15,760
Speaker 3: more respect has been lost. A grown adult holding a

646
00:29:15,760 --> 00:29:19,920
Speaker 3: grudge against their own child pathetic, embarrassing, cringe. I don't

647
00:29:19,960 --> 00:29:22,920
Speaker 3: even think I could get hard. I don't even think

648
00:29:22,960 --> 00:29:26,120
Speaker 3: I could get all ye, I don't even think I

649
00:29:26,120 --> 00:29:28,000
Speaker 3: could get in the mood for a woman like that.

650
00:29:28,040 --> 00:29:32,440
Speaker 2: I don't think God ever be a track with such templement.

651
00:29:34,840 --> 00:29:36,680
Speaker 3: General judgment is not the a hole. But we do

652
00:29:36,720 --> 00:29:38,440
Speaker 3: have an update from two days later.

653
00:29:38,840 --> 00:29:42,120
Speaker 1: What do we think of you still ain't talking. I'm like, dude,

654
00:29:42,240 --> 00:29:43,760
Speaker 1: you think I'm gonna respect you more?

655
00:29:43,840 --> 00:29:44,120
Speaker 4: Now?

656
00:29:44,480 --> 00:29:46,600
Speaker 2: Is this you earning the respect back?

657
00:29:46,840 --> 00:29:50,920
Speaker 3: Like silent treatment is? Like, dude, you're just making it

658
00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:53,120
Speaker 3: so much worse. There's so many weights.

659
00:29:53,240 --> 00:29:56,040
Speaker 2: That's what the thirteen year old is supposed to be doing.

660
00:29:56,240 --> 00:30:02,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, you come on. Set an example dates two days later.

661
00:30:02,480 --> 00:30:04,560
Speaker 2: Hey, it's Sam, your ogi host here. Read it back

662
00:30:04,560 --> 00:30:05,040
Speaker 2: to the stories.

663
00:30:05,040 --> 00:30:06,360
Speaker 1: But here's three minutes bads from our.

664
00:30:06,320 --> 00:30:10,400
Speaker 3: Sponsored yesterday Sunday, my wife wanted to take the two

665
00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:13,240
Speaker 3: younger children to the library. I tried to talk to her,

666
00:30:13,280 --> 00:30:15,560
Speaker 3: but she locked herself in the four year old's room.

667
00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:18,400
Speaker 3: I took our two older children to the dog park.

668
00:30:18,520 --> 00:30:21,000
Speaker 3: She took our four year old to the library. At

669
00:30:21,000 --> 00:30:22,920
Speaker 3: the dog park, I talked to our thirteen year old.

670
00:30:23,120 --> 00:30:24,760
Speaker 3: I explained to him that a lot was going on

671
00:30:24,840 --> 00:30:27,760
Speaker 3: right now and his mother was just overwhelmed. I said

672
00:30:27,760 --> 00:30:29,920
Speaker 3: that sometimes when a person is overwhelmed the next thing

673
00:30:29,960 --> 00:30:32,440
Speaker 3: that happens good, bad, or neutral is the thing that

674
00:30:32,520 --> 00:30:34,880
Speaker 3: pushes them over, and the source of that thing is

675
00:30:34,920 --> 00:30:37,360
Speaker 3: what they lash out at. I said his mom was

676
00:30:37,360 --> 00:30:39,360
Speaker 3: wrong to lash out at him, but it wasn't his

677
00:30:39,440 --> 00:30:41,960
Speaker 3: fault and she didn't really mean it. I said she

678
00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:44,640
Speaker 3: was embarrassed and that was why she was avoiding him.

679
00:30:44,920 --> 00:30:47,360
Speaker 3: He said that wasn't fair, and we kept going back

680
00:30:47,400 --> 00:30:47,800
Speaker 3: and forth.

681
00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:49,560
Speaker 1: Well, he's right about that as well.

682
00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:50,640
Speaker 2: That is true.

683
00:30:51,040 --> 00:30:52,160
Speaker 3: It's definitely not fair.

684
00:30:52,200 --> 00:30:53,880
Speaker 2: I feel like we just need to be saying that

685
00:30:54,720 --> 00:30:57,360
Speaker 2: a just degree. Yeah, just be like, yeah, it's not fair,

686
00:30:57,720 --> 00:31:01,640
Speaker 2: but you know, it's just what happened. Or little animals, yeah,

687
00:31:01,680 --> 00:31:03,520
Speaker 2: big squishy brains.

688
00:31:04,040 --> 00:31:06,680
Speaker 3: I was trying to help him understand that he didn't

689
00:31:06,680 --> 00:31:08,840
Speaker 3: do anything wrong and shouldn't feel bad, but all he

690
00:31:08,840 --> 00:31:11,480
Speaker 3: could focus on was that he was being treated unfairly.

691
00:31:11,840 --> 00:31:14,480
Speaker 3: I told him that it was unfair, okay, but that

692
00:31:14,560 --> 00:31:17,360
Speaker 3: his mom isn't perfect and everyone makes mistakes. I said,

693
00:31:17,360 --> 00:31:19,840
Speaker 3: sometimes he is unfair, but we forgive him because we

694
00:31:19,880 --> 00:31:22,360
Speaker 3: love him. I said, forgiving his mom even though she

695
00:31:22,480 --> 00:31:24,440
Speaker 3: is wrong, would be a nice way to show his

696
00:31:24,520 --> 00:31:27,160
Speaker 3: love for her, but that he doesn't have to Again,

697
00:31:27,280 --> 00:31:30,360
Speaker 3: he just said that the situation was unfair, which it

698
00:31:30,440 --> 00:31:33,600
Speaker 3: is it really is. After the dog park, I took

699
00:31:33,600 --> 00:31:35,600
Speaker 3: our thirteen year old to a friend's house and a

700
00:31:35,680 --> 00:31:38,320
Speaker 3: nine year old to a friend of mine's house. I

701
00:31:38,360 --> 00:31:41,280
Speaker 3: went home and made dinner. However, my wife went out

702
00:31:41,280 --> 00:31:43,520
Speaker 3: for dinner with our four year old, so she didn't

703
00:31:43,520 --> 00:31:46,040
Speaker 3: get home until after I had put everything away. I

704
00:31:46,080 --> 00:31:47,960
Speaker 3: told her that we had to talk now that the

705
00:31:48,000 --> 00:31:51,120
Speaker 3: older kids weren't here, and that not talking wasn't an

706
00:31:51,120 --> 00:31:55,440
Speaker 3: option anymore. But she still ignored me. So I said

707
00:31:55,480 --> 00:31:57,720
Speaker 3: that if she wouldn't engage with me, I would have

708
00:31:57,760 --> 00:31:59,680
Speaker 3: to call our sisters and get them to come over

709
00:31:59,800 --> 00:32:03,920
Speaker 3: to She got very angry, but she finally engaged. She

710
00:32:04,040 --> 00:32:06,920
Speaker 3: told me that she is drowning. She said work is

711
00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:09,440
Speaker 3: exhausting and every day when she gets home, her patients

712
00:32:09,560 --> 00:32:13,280
Speaker 3: is already below zero. She is scared and upset by

713
00:32:13,320 --> 00:32:16,200
Speaker 3: our four year old stomach issues. She said he threw

714
00:32:16,280 --> 00:32:19,080
Speaker 3: up again at dinner. She really shouldn't have taken him

715
00:32:19,080 --> 00:32:20,720
Speaker 3: out to eat because we were supposed to keep track

716
00:32:20,760 --> 00:32:23,200
Speaker 3: of everything he eats before throwing up or not throwing

717
00:32:23,280 --> 00:32:25,880
Speaker 3: up before the appointment today, which is impossible to do

718
00:32:25,920 --> 00:32:28,440
Speaker 3: at a restaurant, but I didn't mention that. She said

719
00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:30,920
Speaker 3: she can't take our thirteen year old's behavior anymore. I

720
00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:33,880
Speaker 3: said he didn't do anything wrong on Thursday. She said

721
00:32:33,880 --> 00:32:35,920
Speaker 3: that when we were that age, if we interrupted our

722
00:32:35,960 --> 00:32:38,320
Speaker 3: parents to tell them they were wrong, we would have

723
00:32:38,360 --> 00:32:39,480
Speaker 3: been punished severely.

724
00:32:39,880 --> 00:32:42,320
Speaker 2: Yes, and you know what, if we take that all

725
00:32:42,360 --> 00:32:44,920
Speaker 2: the way back, people used to get their hands chopped

726
00:32:44,920 --> 00:32:47,400
Speaker 2: off for stealing bread, Right, why don't we go back

727
00:32:47,440 --> 00:32:49,800
Speaker 2: to that, because it's always better to go back to

728
00:32:49,840 --> 00:32:53,800
Speaker 2: the old in ways totally, I think so, Yes, do

729
00:32:53,960 --> 00:32:56,280
Speaker 2: have a headache, Let's get all the blood out of

730
00:32:56,280 --> 00:32:56,680
Speaker 2: your head.

731
00:32:56,960 --> 00:32:58,520
Speaker 1: Yes. The solution that's.

732
00:32:58,360 --> 00:33:00,760
Speaker 3: The issue is he got too much blood. That's why

733
00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:01,280
Speaker 3: it's hurting.

734
00:33:01,760 --> 00:33:01,960
Speaker 2: Yeah.

735
00:33:02,040 --> 00:33:04,880
Speaker 3: No, I think that could have been the thing where

736
00:33:04,920 --> 00:33:09,120
Speaker 3: it's like she's just defaulting to like what she saw

737
00:33:09,360 --> 00:33:11,840
Speaker 3: when she was a kid from her parents or something.

738
00:33:12,120 --> 00:33:14,960
Speaker 3: But hopefully they have a conversation in the next few

739
00:33:15,000 --> 00:33:19,040
Speaker 3: sentences that you know, convinces her otherwise. She said that

740
00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:22,840
Speaker 3: we raised a spoiled, entitled child. She said she can

741
00:33:22,880 --> 00:33:24,960
Speaker 3: never get any peace and quite in her own home

742
00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:27,000
Speaker 3: that we worked hard to pay for because we have

743
00:33:27,120 --> 00:33:29,800
Speaker 3: a spoiled teen that refuses to ever stop talking or

744
00:33:29,800 --> 00:33:30,400
Speaker 3: making noise.

745
00:33:30,520 --> 00:33:33,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe if you wanted that, you shouldn't add three children.

746
00:33:34,080 --> 00:33:38,360
Speaker 3: Yeah is what they do. I don't know about you

747
00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:41,360
Speaker 3: maybe making noises. I said, we have been working on

748
00:33:41,360 --> 00:33:44,479
Speaker 3: those behaviors and he has been improving. But she lashed

749
00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:46,560
Speaker 3: out when he was trying to be helpful, and that

750
00:33:46,680 --> 00:33:49,600
Speaker 3: sends the wrong message. She told me that I'm not

751
00:33:49,680 --> 00:33:53,360
Speaker 3: supporting her. She said that she needs things to change.

752
00:33:53,440 --> 00:33:55,480
Speaker 3: She said, we need to crack down and stop being

753
00:33:55,480 --> 00:33:58,160
Speaker 3: so lenient. If he plays the recorder after we've told

754
00:33:58,240 --> 00:33:59,960
Speaker 3: him he's done for the night, we need to take it.

755
00:34:00,120 --> 00:34:02,600
Speaker 3: If he interrupts, he needs to go straight to his room.

756
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:05,680
Speaker 3: If he argues about curfew, he needs to lose privileges.

757
00:34:06,120 --> 00:34:08,720
Speaker 3: I told her we need to take a step back.

758
00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:11,719
Speaker 3: I said, if she is overwhelmed, she needs to take

759
00:34:11,760 --> 00:34:14,480
Speaker 3: a break. I told her this heightened emotional state is

760
00:34:14,520 --> 00:34:17,640
Speaker 3: a bad time to make huge household changes. I suggested,

761
00:34:17,800 --> 00:34:19,799
Speaker 3: like many commentaris did, that she get a hotel for

762
00:34:19,800 --> 00:34:23,120
Speaker 3: a few days and decompress. She said she's not the problem,

763
00:34:23,239 --> 00:34:23,880
Speaker 3: and he is.

764
00:34:24,480 --> 00:34:25,040
Speaker 1: Ah.

765
00:34:25,160 --> 00:34:32,680
Speaker 2: Yes, Ahoo, leave the thirteen year old for everything.

766
00:34:33,120 --> 00:34:36,120
Speaker 4: I will say, though, like those seem like valid rules

767
00:34:36,160 --> 00:34:36,800
Speaker 4: to change.

768
00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:37,759
Speaker 3: They kind of do.

769
00:34:38,000 --> 00:34:39,080
Speaker 1: If there is gonna be.

770
00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:42,399
Speaker 4: Annoying and play your recorder after we told you to stop, Yeah,

771
00:34:42,440 --> 00:34:45,279
Speaker 4: there's a consequence if you're gonna keep doing this thing. Yeah,

772
00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:48,480
Speaker 4: it's a consequence. Like I feel like her being like,

773
00:34:48,520 --> 00:34:50,719
Speaker 4: we just need to add some consequences in and him

774
00:34:50,760 --> 00:34:53,960
Speaker 4: being like whoa whoaah weird.

775
00:34:54,520 --> 00:34:57,719
Speaker 3: I mean, I think this is also it feels like

776
00:34:57,800 --> 00:35:00,520
Speaker 3: every single part of this is like so nuanced, you know,

777
00:35:00,719 --> 00:35:03,399
Speaker 3: Like I think it probably would be a good thing

778
00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:05,520
Speaker 3: for her to decompress. But I do agree. I think

779
00:35:05,560 --> 00:35:08,239
Speaker 3: some of those rules are probably fine. And if she's

780
00:35:08,280 --> 00:35:11,520
Speaker 3: saying like that she's not the problem he is, it's like, okay,

781
00:35:11,560 --> 00:35:16,400
Speaker 3: well he is this way because of our parenting in

782
00:35:16,440 --> 00:35:18,880
Speaker 3: a way, so like maybe we can chill out a

783
00:35:18,920 --> 00:35:22,160
Speaker 3: little bit and then hopefully he chills out more or

784
00:35:22,160 --> 00:35:24,680
Speaker 3: something like that. You know. I mean it's obviously not

785
00:35:24,719 --> 00:35:26,799
Speaker 3: that simple, but like, I don't know, I feel like

786
00:35:27,160 --> 00:35:31,120
Speaker 3: everything is they're just so close, they're so close to agreeing. Yeah,

787
00:35:31,360 --> 00:35:35,120
Speaker 3: there's some things that's like yeah, but like not quite.

788
00:35:35,440 --> 00:35:37,160
Speaker 2: You just don't like how she's trying to paint it,

789
00:35:37,200 --> 00:35:40,719
Speaker 2: Like he interrupted me, girl, you just got one thing wrong.

790
00:35:40,840 --> 00:35:43,040
Speaker 2: Your nine year olds just said thirty seven and then

791
00:35:43,080 --> 00:35:45,920
Speaker 2: you said forty seven, but you meant to say forty nine.

792
00:35:45,960 --> 00:35:47,879
Speaker 1: That's all right, let that go.

793
00:35:48,440 --> 00:35:51,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, and also snap the recorder in half, for

794
00:35:51,600 --> 00:35:56,200
Speaker 2: god's say, it's the worst instrument ever. Okay, snap that

795
00:35:56,239 --> 00:35:58,000
Speaker 2: thing and ever, just taken away from him whenever you're

796
00:35:58,040 --> 00:36:01,640
Speaker 2: posed too sure, but like he's not wrong where it's like, yeah,

797
00:36:01,960 --> 00:36:05,280
Speaker 2: you haven't spoken to him in five days. The first

798
00:36:05,280 --> 00:36:08,480
Speaker 2: thing you say to him shouldn't be this is a thing,

799
00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:10,080
Speaker 2: and that's a thing, and this is a thing and

800
00:36:10,120 --> 00:36:10,560
Speaker 2: that's a thing.

801
00:36:10,840 --> 00:36:13,040
Speaker 1: It's like, no, the first thing you should say should be, hey,

802
00:36:13,080 --> 00:36:13,640
Speaker 1: I'm sorry.

803
00:36:13,760 --> 00:36:16,560
Speaker 2: I messed up and I'm having a hard time because

804
00:36:16,680 --> 00:36:19,360
Speaker 2: i'm your mom, but I'm also just human, you know.

805
00:36:19,520 --> 00:36:21,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I should clarify. I didn't mean like jump

806
00:36:21,680 --> 00:36:23,440
Speaker 4: in with all these new rules. I just mean, like

807
00:36:23,600 --> 00:36:26,000
Speaker 4: that's a good thing to consider once our emotions have

808
00:36:26,120 --> 00:36:28,120
Speaker 4: come down and we've taken a step back, and yeah,

809
00:36:28,200 --> 00:36:31,120
Speaker 4: freaking apologize to our child totally.

810
00:36:31,200 --> 00:36:33,240
Speaker 3: And I think too, it's like, well, if that stuff

811
00:36:33,280 --> 00:36:35,799
Speaker 3: is really, what's the issue like of him, you know,

812
00:36:35,840 --> 00:36:37,640
Speaker 3: playing the recorder when they asked him not to like

813
00:36:37,760 --> 00:36:40,360
Speaker 3: doing all this stuff when they specifically asked him not to.

814
00:36:40,840 --> 00:36:44,600
Speaker 3: We have to know that, like, just because he's interrupting

815
00:36:44,680 --> 00:36:47,920
Speaker 3: sometimes doesn't mean that every single time he starts talking

816
00:36:48,280 --> 00:36:50,560
Speaker 3: is a bad interruption, you know. Yeah, Like we can

817
00:36:50,640 --> 00:36:54,600
Speaker 3: acknowledge that this forty nine thing is like a fine example.

818
00:36:54,719 --> 00:36:57,319
Speaker 3: We have to be specific and like the ways that

819
00:36:57,360 --> 00:36:59,239
Speaker 3: he's doing something wrong or else, he's not actually going

820
00:36:59,280 --> 00:37:01,360
Speaker 3: to learn. He's just to learn that he's not allowed

821
00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:03,239
Speaker 3: to talk around the house. And I feel like that's

822
00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:06,040
Speaker 3: the worst thing that you can do for a teenager

823
00:37:06,080 --> 00:37:08,120
Speaker 3: who's about to go through some very hard times in

824
00:37:08,160 --> 00:37:12,200
Speaker 3: his life. Like it's no good. She said that he

825
00:37:12,400 --> 00:37:15,520
Speaker 3: was bad from the beginning. She said, when our daughter

826
00:37:15,560 --> 00:37:18,239
Speaker 3: didn't have all of his issues, she thought that it

827
00:37:18,320 --> 00:37:20,239
Speaker 3: was because she's a girl. But our four year old

828
00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:22,759
Speaker 3: is a boy and it's also better behaved, So he

829
00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:25,640
Speaker 3: is the problem. She also said, I've always seen it

830
00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:28,359
Speaker 3: and used to admit it, but stopped to make her

831
00:37:28,480 --> 00:37:31,400
Speaker 3: look crazy for context. I used to joke that our

832
00:37:31,440 --> 00:37:34,160
Speaker 3: thirteen year old is challenging because he likes to be

833
00:37:34,200 --> 00:37:37,080
Speaker 3: outside so much, loves animals, loves playing on his recorder.

834
00:37:37,480 --> 00:37:39,160
Speaker 1: Uh, changeling Okay.

835
00:37:39,200 --> 00:37:40,720
Speaker 3: I was like, why is that challenging?

836
00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:42,239
Speaker 2: I don't know, it's like a fantasy thing.

837
00:37:42,320 --> 00:37:42,520
Speaker 4: Yeah.

838
00:37:42,600 --> 00:37:46,600
Speaker 2: No, but it's like, yeah, now I'm like eyebrows going up.

839
00:37:46,680 --> 00:37:47,480
Speaker 1: I'm concerned.

840
00:37:47,520 --> 00:37:50,200
Speaker 2: It's like, you sound like you want to like drop

841
00:37:50,280 --> 00:37:53,520
Speaker 2: the kid in the middle of the woods, leave him there.

842
00:37:54,440 --> 00:37:57,000
Speaker 3: He belongs out with the animals. He can make friends

843
00:37:57,000 --> 00:37:58,880
Speaker 3: with the squirrels and live in their homes.

844
00:37:59,120 --> 00:38:02,879
Speaker 2: I think there's some therapy that needs to go on here,

845
00:38:03,800 --> 00:38:06,800
Speaker 2: because you're probably just dealing with a thirteen year old who,

846
00:38:06,920 --> 00:38:11,439
Speaker 2: do I don't know, could have a behavioral disorder. Yeah,

847
00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:15,000
Speaker 2: that's crazy, right, No thirteen year old has ever had that, right,

848
00:38:15,680 --> 00:38:18,319
Speaker 2: But you know, whatever, deal with it.

849
00:38:18,400 --> 00:38:19,120
Speaker 1: You're the problem.

850
00:38:19,280 --> 00:38:21,120
Speaker 2: Even if he is the problem, it's your problem.

851
00:38:21,360 --> 00:38:23,640
Speaker 3: Yeah. You don't fix it by just like punishing him

852
00:38:23,680 --> 00:38:26,359
Speaker 3: so much. You fix it by fixing yourself. I want

853
00:38:26,360 --> 00:38:29,120
Speaker 3: to stress that this was a joke. The reason I

854
00:38:29,160 --> 00:38:31,360
Speaker 3: stopped making this joke is because I noticed that my

855
00:38:31,400 --> 00:38:34,880
Speaker 3: wife didn't find it funny anymore. This was years ago, anyway.

856
00:38:35,400 --> 00:38:38,040
Speaker 3: I said all that, and she said no that I

857
00:38:38,080 --> 00:38:40,800
Speaker 3: saw even then that he is wrong, but stopped acknowledging

858
00:38:40,840 --> 00:38:43,080
Speaker 3: it to make her feel like the problem. She also

859
00:38:43,160 --> 00:38:45,920
Speaker 3: said that she has been seeing an online therapist. I

860
00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:48,680
Speaker 3: had no idea, she said. She didn't tell me because

861
00:38:48,719 --> 00:38:51,319
Speaker 3: she was embarrassed. Her therapist told her that our son

862
00:38:51,400 --> 00:38:55,360
Speaker 3: has dangerous tendencies and shows signs of being contemptuous towards

863
00:38:55,360 --> 00:38:57,040
Speaker 3: women because he doesn't respect his mother.

864
00:38:57,160 --> 00:38:59,480
Speaker 1: She definitely used chat ept for that.

865
00:39:00,040 --> 00:39:01,640
Speaker 3: That's the online therapist.

866
00:39:01,360 --> 00:39:05,480
Speaker 2: Guys, chat ebt's program to agree with you. So if

867
00:39:05,520 --> 00:39:07,600
Speaker 2: you put stuff into it, like my kid is blah

868
00:39:07,600 --> 00:39:10,359
Speaker 2: blah blah blah blah, it's gonna go, oh, yeah, you're

869
00:39:10,560 --> 00:39:14,040
Speaker 2: so right, and he's gonna he's a danger to you.

870
00:39:14,120 --> 00:39:17,799
Speaker 3: Actually, Yeah, I feel like a therapist for a mother

871
00:39:17,960 --> 00:39:20,840
Speaker 3: should be talking about the problems with the mother, not saying,

872
00:39:20,880 --> 00:39:24,480
Speaker 3: oh my gosh, your son hates women. Yeah, he's gonna

873
00:39:24,520 --> 00:39:28,000
Speaker 3: be a terrible person to all of his future partners.

874
00:39:28,360 --> 00:39:28,560
Speaker 4: Yeah.

875
00:39:29,520 --> 00:39:32,600
Speaker 3: I don't like that. I had no idea how to

876
00:39:32,640 --> 00:39:35,040
Speaker 3: respond to that. I said. Any therapist who would say

877
00:39:35,080 --> 00:39:37,760
Speaker 3: something like that about a child they've never met shouldn't

878
00:39:37,760 --> 00:39:40,399
Speaker 3: be licensed, And if it's an online therapist, for all

879
00:39:40,440 --> 00:39:43,120
Speaker 3: she knows, they aren't. There is more to the story.

880
00:39:43,120 --> 00:39:45,600
Speaker 3: But yeah, I like this situation at all.

881
00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:49,239
Speaker 2: I don't like it sounds like maybe you should do

882
00:39:49,440 --> 00:39:52,520
Speaker 2: some therapy with your son instead of lying to your

883
00:39:52,640 --> 00:39:58,319
Speaker 2: husband and clearly using a large language model to reaffirm

884
00:39:58,440 --> 00:40:01,960
Speaker 2: that your son has broken and he is the problem

885
00:40:02,040 --> 00:40:02,840
Speaker 2: and you're fine.

886
00:40:02,800 --> 00:40:05,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, cause do that. She's really doing that with everything here.

887
00:40:05,760 --> 00:40:08,360
Speaker 3: She's like, Oh, well, I'm doing this because you made me.

888
00:40:08,600 --> 00:40:13,560
Speaker 3: I'm overwhelmed and I snapped because you interrupted me. You

889
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:16,640
Speaker 3: shouldn't have done that. You are the one making me

890
00:40:16,680 --> 00:40:20,360
Speaker 3: feel crazy because you used to agree with this and

891
00:40:20,400 --> 00:40:20,919
Speaker 3: now you don't.

892
00:40:21,040 --> 00:40:24,480
Speaker 2: It's like, hold on, it's just everything she's saying is

893
00:40:24,520 --> 00:40:27,120
Speaker 2: She's like, she's just trying to justify her own behavior.

894
00:40:27,239 --> 00:40:29,279
Speaker 2: It's like she explains, like, oh, I like, I just

895
00:40:29,320 --> 00:40:31,359
Speaker 2: feel like I'm drowning at work and everything at home

896
00:40:31,520 --> 00:40:34,759
Speaker 2: is so chaotic and blah blah blah. And then OPI's like, Okay, well,

897
00:40:34,760 --> 00:40:35,279
Speaker 2: why don't we.

898
00:40:35,239 --> 00:40:36,760
Speaker 1: Get you like a hotel room.

899
00:40:37,120 --> 00:40:39,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, stay there for like a long weekend and just

900
00:40:39,520 --> 00:40:43,359
Speaker 2: straight up decompress, right, get back to zero. And she's like, no,

901
00:40:43,440 --> 00:40:45,760
Speaker 2: I don't need to do that, right. She just wants,

902
00:40:45,800 --> 00:40:47,759
Speaker 2: she needs, She wants there to be a problem, and

903
00:40:47,800 --> 00:40:49,200
Speaker 2: she wants to be the one who's right.

904
00:40:49,640 --> 00:40:52,279
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the problem. She wants everyone else to be responsible,

905
00:40:52,440 --> 00:40:55,560
Speaker 3: but that's not how things are fixed. Sorry, girl. At

906
00:40:55,560 --> 00:40:57,640
Speaker 3: the end of our conversation, she agreed to go to

907
00:40:57,640 --> 00:40:59,839
Speaker 3: the hotel only if she took our four year old

908
00:40:59,880 --> 00:41:01,719
Speaker 3: with her, because she wanted to be the one to

909
00:41:01,719 --> 00:41:04,319
Speaker 3: take him to his medical appointment. I didn't think that

910
00:41:04,360 --> 00:41:07,160
Speaker 3: was a good idea at all. However, she ended up

911
00:41:07,200 --> 00:41:09,800
Speaker 3: just taking him and going. I picked up the kids

912
00:41:09,840 --> 00:41:12,760
Speaker 3: and brought them home. They sensed that something is wrong,

913
00:41:12,880 --> 00:41:15,480
Speaker 3: and we're very subdued this morning getting ready for school.

914
00:41:15,719 --> 00:41:17,360
Speaker 3: I talked to my boss when I came in, and

915
00:41:17,400 --> 00:41:19,160
Speaker 3: he's going to let me leave early to go to

916
00:41:19,160 --> 00:41:21,600
Speaker 3: our four year old's medical appointment. I'm not sure what

917
00:41:21,680 --> 00:41:24,280
Speaker 3: will happen there. I'm hoping it will be good news

918
00:41:24,360 --> 00:41:26,720
Speaker 3: and that will make us all feel less on edge.

919
00:41:27,200 --> 00:41:28,719
Speaker 3: And that's the end of that story.

920
00:41:28,800 --> 00:41:29,120
Speaker 2: Dang.

921
00:41:29,239 --> 00:41:32,239
Speaker 1: You know what. Honestly, that's something I didn't really factor in.

922
00:41:32,320 --> 00:41:34,759
Speaker 2: But yeah, if the four year old is also having

923
00:41:34,840 --> 00:41:39,080
Speaker 2: like weird, you know, health complications, like, yeah, dude, I

924
00:41:39,120 --> 00:41:41,120
Speaker 2: can't imagine the level of stress I would be.

925
00:41:41,760 --> 00:41:45,279
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's true, and I mean, yeah, like to give

926
00:41:45,320 --> 00:41:48,480
Speaker 3: her some grace. I guess, like, yeah, that all sounds

927
00:41:48,480 --> 00:41:52,600
Speaker 3: like very overwhelming parent stuff that I have not even

928
00:41:52,680 --> 00:41:57,480
Speaker 3: gotten close to understanding. I know, a parrot, but yeah,

929
00:41:57,760 --> 00:41:59,719
Speaker 3: I think it's just like I don't know, I wish

930
00:41:59,719 --> 00:42:01,960
Speaker 3: that they can lean on each other more and be

931
00:42:02,040 --> 00:42:03,000
Speaker 3: a team more here.

932
00:42:03,440 --> 00:42:06,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I'm sure the stuff it sounds like

933
00:42:06,480 --> 00:42:08,560
Speaker 2: the stuff about the thirteen year old has been sort

934
00:42:08,600 --> 00:42:13,439
Speaker 2: of building for a while. Yeah, you know, but even

935
00:42:13,480 --> 00:42:17,000
Speaker 2: if she is super you know, blown out and overwhelmed,

936
00:42:17,040 --> 00:42:21,399
Speaker 2: it's like it doesn't justify literally like not even what's

937
00:42:21,440 --> 00:42:25,200
Speaker 2: the word, like be like you're in a competition with

938
00:42:25,360 --> 00:42:28,160
Speaker 2: your thirteen year old about like I don't even know.

939
00:42:28,120 --> 00:42:29,879
Speaker 1: I don't it's cause it's not it's not really about

940
00:42:29,920 --> 00:42:30,440
Speaker 1: the math.

941
00:42:30,560 --> 00:42:34,120
Speaker 2: It's about like yeah, at that point, like manners, because

942
00:42:34,160 --> 00:42:36,160
Speaker 2: it's like he interrupted me. But then it's like then

943
00:42:36,200 --> 00:42:38,839
Speaker 2: you told him to shut up and go to his room.

944
00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:42,440
Speaker 2: It's you made the bigger mistake there, right, because he

945
00:42:42,480 --> 00:42:45,480
Speaker 2: didn't interrupt you and go it's forty nine, you big fat,

946
00:42:45,520 --> 00:42:46,440
Speaker 2: stupid idiot.

947
00:42:46,600 --> 00:42:48,399
Speaker 1: He said, no, Mom, it's forty nine.

948
00:42:49,000 --> 00:42:51,319
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's all. And you won't even like go back

949
00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:54,480
Speaker 3: on that one small thing. Yeah, it's just I mean

950
00:42:54,520 --> 00:42:56,440
Speaker 3: we read one story one time, I think it was

951
00:42:56,480 --> 00:42:57,920
Speaker 3: you and me, Carly that we were reading it where

952
00:42:57,960 --> 00:43:01,000
Speaker 3: it was like this woman was like, I just I

953
00:43:01,040 --> 00:43:04,680
Speaker 3: don't like this, but I don't really like my thirteen

954
00:43:04,760 --> 00:43:06,720
Speaker 3: year old, like I just don't like my child.

955
00:43:06,719 --> 00:43:09,279
Speaker 4: Well, I feel like that was one that we read.

956
00:43:09,520 --> 00:43:12,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, but it ended up nice because I mean she

957
00:43:12,320 --> 00:43:13,600
Speaker 3: was just saying, like, we don't have a lot of

958
00:43:13,640 --> 00:43:16,960
Speaker 3: interests this this girl is just very like oh, like

959
00:43:17,360 --> 00:43:20,000
Speaker 3: you know, shaming the sister for wearing more revealing outfits

960
00:43:20,040 --> 00:43:22,279
Speaker 3: and calling her like not a feminist because of that.

961
00:43:22,960 --> 00:43:25,960
Speaker 4: So into her other kids and so against this also

962
00:43:26,000 --> 00:43:27,160
Speaker 4: thirteen year old, I think.

963
00:43:27,000 --> 00:43:28,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, And so they just didn't get along. But what

964
00:43:28,840 --> 00:43:31,399
Speaker 3: ended up happening was that that parent got a lot

965
00:43:31,400 --> 00:43:34,719
Speaker 3: of good advice from the comments and just invested herself

966
00:43:34,800 --> 00:43:38,479
Speaker 3: in this kid's like interests more instead of like because

967
00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:40,440
Speaker 3: they just watch different movies and stuff like that.

968
00:43:40,719 --> 00:43:42,359
Speaker 4: Because she would be like when I love my one

969
00:43:42,440 --> 00:43:45,839
Speaker 4: daughter who likes all of my same interests as me, right,

970
00:43:45,880 --> 00:43:48,359
Speaker 4: and I don't understand.

971
00:43:47,640 --> 00:43:50,840
Speaker 3: The other one. Yeah, So it's like like that seems

972
00:43:50,920 --> 00:43:53,400
Speaker 3: understanding to me because it's like you are growing a

973
00:43:53,520 --> 00:43:56,560
Speaker 3: human who is a is their own human. Like you

974
00:43:56,560 --> 00:43:59,600
Speaker 3: can influence them as as much as you can try,

975
00:43:59,640 --> 00:44:01,920
Speaker 3: but like they're their own person. So I kind of

976
00:44:01,960 --> 00:44:04,520
Speaker 3: get like if you don't totally get along. But as

977
00:44:04,560 --> 00:44:05,319
Speaker 3: a parent.

978
00:44:05,120 --> 00:44:07,839
Speaker 4: One day doing the other child's interests, it was.

979
00:44:07,800 --> 00:44:11,560
Speaker 3: Like, actually she's cool. Yeah, like literally just she solved

980
00:44:11,560 --> 00:44:14,200
Speaker 3: the issue by trying to understand her more and like

981
00:44:14,400 --> 00:44:16,560
Speaker 3: get on her level and finding common ground and stuff

982
00:44:16,600 --> 00:44:18,839
Speaker 3: like that. So it's like I would hope that this

983
00:44:19,440 --> 00:44:23,200
Speaker 3: wife would do the same for her kids, Like it

984
00:44:23,280 --> 00:44:26,120
Speaker 3: sucks that she's so against and it just thinking like,

985
00:44:26,200 --> 00:44:29,160
Speaker 3: oh my gosh, I can't handle this kid. Maybe they're

986
00:44:29,200 --> 00:44:31,440
Speaker 3: just different. Maybe they just need to find some sort

987
00:44:31,480 --> 00:44:35,480
Speaker 3: of common ground. But that's on the mom to do

988
00:44:35,680 --> 00:44:36,560
Speaker 3: and take that step.

989
00:44:36,760 --> 00:44:39,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's gone you to be the parent.

990
00:44:39,480 --> 00:44:41,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, but that's the end of that story. We've got

991
00:44:41,760 --> 00:44:42,920
Speaker 3: another one coming up.

992
00:44:43,200 --> 00:44:44,759
Speaker 1: Hey, it's John here Og, host of the show.

993
00:44:44,760 --> 00:44:46,480
Speaker 2: We're gonna get back to these juicy stories. But here's

994
00:44:46,480 --> 00:44:49,000
Speaker 2: a quick three minutes of ads from our sponsors. I

995
00:44:49,080 --> 00:44:52,880
Speaker 2: gave my husband another chance, but he ruined it once again.

996
00:44:53,360 --> 00:44:55,719
Speaker 3: Ah, come on, man.

997
00:44:56,320 --> 00:44:59,400
Speaker 2: So me and my husband met when I was fresh

998
00:44:59,440 --> 00:45:01,840
Speaker 2: out of college, and a year later we started to

999
00:45:01,920 --> 00:45:07,800
Speaker 2: have this casual relationship of friends with benefit kind of thing. However,

1000
00:45:07,840 --> 00:45:11,320
Speaker 2: eight months into this relationship, I ended up pregnant. That

1001
00:45:11,480 --> 00:45:15,000
Speaker 2: the darnest thing I'd always wanted a baby, and I

1002
00:45:15,080 --> 00:45:17,440
Speaker 2: decided to keep it even if my friend decided he

1003
00:45:17,520 --> 00:45:20,040
Speaker 2: wanted nothing to do with it. And by the way,

1004
00:45:20,080 --> 00:45:24,319
Speaker 2: this comes from user analyst worldly six one four to one,

1005
00:45:24,640 --> 00:45:28,959
Speaker 2: directly from the oar slash okay storytime, separate it what and.

1006
00:45:28,960 --> 00:45:31,920
Speaker 1: You should go there to submit your own stories.

1007
00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:35,560
Speaker 2: I'm Dakota, I'm Angie, I'm Carly, and we're here to

1008
00:45:35,560 --> 00:45:37,880
Speaker 2: give good advice goofully, but we don't know all the answers.

1009
00:45:38,080 --> 00:45:40,160
Speaker 1: We only know what we know. So let us know

1010
00:45:40,239 --> 00:45:43,120
Speaker 1: the things that you know down in the comments and hope,

1011
00:45:43,120 --> 00:45:44,560
Speaker 1: he says. Luckily.

1012
00:45:44,840 --> 00:45:48,080
Speaker 2: He seemed very excited and said I could do whatever

1013
00:45:48,160 --> 00:45:50,440
Speaker 2: I wanted and that he would be there to support me.

1014
00:45:50,960 --> 00:45:54,719
Speaker 2: He even suggested making the relationship real and introducing each

1015
00:45:54,719 --> 00:45:57,120
Speaker 2: other to our families. Since he wanted to be married

1016
00:45:57,160 --> 00:46:00,000
Speaker 2: to me and spend his life with me, we decide

1017
00:46:00,040 --> 00:46:02,799
Speaker 2: I did to do this. At this time, I had

1018
00:46:02,840 --> 00:46:05,640
Speaker 2: already started working and was living in my own apartment

1019
00:46:05,640 --> 00:46:07,160
Speaker 2: in the building that my dad owned.

1020
00:46:07,480 --> 00:46:10,040
Speaker 1: In our culture, we do not really move out when

1021
00:46:10,080 --> 00:46:13,080
Speaker 1: we turn eighteen, and our parents support us financially for

1022
00:46:13,120 --> 00:46:15,720
Speaker 1: as long as they can. My husband at that time

1023
00:46:15,880 --> 00:46:18,680
Speaker 1: had no job and ran a bar that had literally

1024
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:22,160
Speaker 1: zero income because it was just an empty place for

1025
00:46:22,239 --> 00:46:23,600
Speaker 1: all of our friends to gather.

1026
00:46:24,600 --> 00:46:26,359
Speaker 3: Sounds like a grand old time though.

1027
00:46:26,600 --> 00:46:30,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm a bar owner, still looking for the bar.

1028
00:46:31,480 --> 00:46:33,880
Speaker 1: But we do have an empty square.

1029
00:46:34,239 --> 00:46:37,239
Speaker 3: We have the empty square. We've got the vibes that

1030
00:46:37,280 --> 00:46:40,280
Speaker 3: go along with it, which arguably most important part.

1031
00:46:40,160 --> 00:46:42,640
Speaker 1: Of a bar. We do have the bar patrons.

1032
00:46:42,920 --> 00:46:46,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, no bar though, No, it's still working on that.

1033
00:46:46,560 --> 00:46:50,200
Speaker 2: There's a building. Yeah, it says bar on the outside. Yeah,

1034
00:46:50,320 --> 00:46:53,000
Speaker 2: so like no, no bar on the inside though.

1035
00:46:53,200 --> 00:46:54,920
Speaker 4: No, this is bar in the So you walk up,

1036
00:46:54,960 --> 00:46:56,160
Speaker 4: you go, which bar are you going to?

1037
00:46:56,480 --> 00:46:57,160
Speaker 3: Bar? The bar?

1038
00:46:57,560 --> 00:46:57,799
Speaker 2: Bar?

1039
00:46:58,000 --> 00:46:58,359
Speaker 3: The bar?

1040
00:46:58,560 --> 00:47:01,240
Speaker 1: You know, bar, barbar bar barbar.

1041
00:47:01,880 --> 00:47:04,160
Speaker 2: Oh, dude, that would do numbers in La.

1042
00:47:04,200 --> 00:47:06,600
Speaker 4: Or bar bar would do so well.

1043
00:47:07,600 --> 00:47:08,960
Speaker 2: The dumbest thing I've ever heard.

1044
00:47:09,080 --> 00:47:13,799
Speaker 4: I'm picturing bar bar in Culver somewhere downtown bar bar.

1045
00:47:13,960 --> 00:47:19,279
Speaker 2: Everyone's buying thirty dollars. Cocktails cost five cents to make.

1046
00:47:20,360 --> 00:47:22,840
Speaker 3: Tall drink cold drink, drink.

1047
00:47:24,239 --> 00:47:29,759
Speaker 4: Small drink, quick drink, to drink, red drink, blue drinks.

1048
00:47:30,200 --> 00:47:32,320
Speaker 3: The many looks like it's just been written in pencil.

1049
00:47:32,760 --> 00:47:35,520
Speaker 2: Guys, we can't give everyone barbar three.

1050
00:47:35,600 --> 00:47:38,680
Speaker 1: Okay, we'll be behind closed door.

1051
00:47:39,160 --> 00:47:40,120
Speaker 3: You take the czars.

1052
00:47:42,000 --> 00:47:44,680
Speaker 2: He stayed with me most of the time whenever he

1053
00:47:44,760 --> 00:47:47,840
Speaker 2: came to my city and moved in permanently. After the pregnancy,

1054
00:47:48,280 --> 00:47:50,640
Speaker 2: our families were cool with it and decided to give

1055
00:47:50,719 --> 00:47:54,600
Speaker 2: us their blessing. During this whole pregnancy, I was working,

1056
00:47:54,800 --> 00:47:57,520
Speaker 2: I paid the bills, and I paid for everything. I

1057
00:47:57,600 --> 00:48:00,520
Speaker 2: was okay with this, and I always said, if I'm

1058
00:48:00,560 --> 00:48:02,839
Speaker 2: being treated the right way and the way I want

1059
00:48:02,880 --> 00:48:05,400
Speaker 2: to be treated, I don't mind being the breadwinner.

1060
00:48:05,880 --> 00:48:07,400
Speaker 1: And my husband was very good to me.

1061
00:48:07,760 --> 00:48:10,440
Speaker 2: My brother suggested opening up a restaurant to help my

1062
00:48:10,600 --> 00:48:13,359
Speaker 2: husband stand on his feet. You can call that one

1063
00:48:13,400 --> 00:48:14,800
Speaker 2: restaurant restaurant.

1064
00:48:15,880 --> 00:48:17,080
Speaker 4: Now right next to bar.

1065
00:48:17,239 --> 00:48:19,440
Speaker 3: I think we have to like really call out the

1066
00:48:19,640 --> 00:48:22,160
Speaker 3: great joke that Carli just made, because can find just

1067
00:48:22,160 --> 00:48:25,759
Speaker 3: said rebar and Carl said, that's what we'll rebrand to

1068
00:48:25,840 --> 00:48:31,239
Speaker 3: if we ever get shut down. Perfect.

1069
00:48:31,560 --> 00:48:33,480
Speaker 4: I saw Angie chuckle at that across the room.

1070
00:48:33,520 --> 00:48:36,319
Speaker 3: And I was like, we stuck cannot go unnoticed.

1071
00:48:37,160 --> 00:48:38,680
Speaker 2: Yes, yes that was a good call out.

1072
00:48:39,160 --> 00:48:42,799
Speaker 4: That was great and ming ming barbar with the Barbarian bartenders.

1073
00:48:42,920 --> 00:48:45,680
Speaker 3: Dude, stellar idea right here.

1074
00:48:46,120 --> 00:48:49,640
Speaker 2: Keep on it just keeps getting better. We would not

1075
00:48:49,840 --> 00:48:52,839
Speaker 2: have to pay any investment money for the setup, and

1076
00:48:53,000 --> 00:48:56,279
Speaker 2: if we had profit, it would be divided equally for

1077
00:48:56,360 --> 00:48:58,800
Speaker 2: at least a year. If it was running at a loss,

1078
00:48:58,920 --> 00:49:01,840
Speaker 2: we would not have to be The key condition was

1079
00:49:01,880 --> 00:49:05,080
Speaker 2: that my husband had to be the manager. Everything was

1080
00:49:05,120 --> 00:49:07,600
Speaker 2: going so good, and I was so happy that I

1081
00:49:07,680 --> 00:49:10,560
Speaker 2: was already lucky with a generous family who treated me

1082
00:49:10,680 --> 00:49:13,680
Speaker 2: like their princess, and even luckier with a husband who

1083
00:49:13,719 --> 00:49:14,919
Speaker 2: treated me the same way.

1084
00:49:15,480 --> 00:49:17,719
Speaker 1: However, after giving birth.

1085
00:49:17,760 --> 00:49:22,160
Speaker 2: Everything changed. My husband started to get moody and withdrawn

1086
00:49:22,360 --> 00:49:25,480
Speaker 2: all the time. It started the night my daughter was born.

1087
00:49:25,840 --> 00:49:27,800
Speaker 2: It was just the two of us in the hospital

1088
00:49:27,920 --> 00:49:31,600
Speaker 2: due to the lockdown. His mood shifted and he stopped

1089
00:49:31,680 --> 00:49:35,000
Speaker 2: talking to me just because I shouted.

1090
00:49:34,680 --> 00:49:37,200
Speaker 1: Come fast, I need to go to the toilet.

1091
00:49:37,880 --> 00:49:41,440
Speaker 2: This was right after I gave birth to this big

1092
00:49:41,480 --> 00:49:46,080
Speaker 2: old baby and had multiple tears in my virginia that

1093
00:49:46,320 --> 00:49:50,359
Speaker 2: nearly reached my booty. So everything now I'm gonna say

1094
00:49:50,400 --> 00:49:57,120
Speaker 2: anus that nearly reached my anus. Okay, so everything downstairs

1095
00:49:57,320 --> 00:49:58,800
Speaker 2: was completely messed up.

1096
00:49:59,040 --> 00:49:59,399
Speaker 1: He said.

1097
00:49:59,440 --> 00:50:02,240
Speaker 2: I disresp specked him all the time and stopped talking

1098
00:50:02,239 --> 00:50:04,480
Speaker 2: to me right after you gave birth.

1099
00:50:04,920 --> 00:50:06,120
Speaker 3: That's insane.

1100
00:50:06,520 --> 00:50:08,200
Speaker 4: You yelled that you had to go pee.

1101
00:50:08,800 --> 00:50:11,000
Speaker 3: I literally have to go to the bathroom because the

1102
00:50:11,120 --> 00:50:14,880
Speaker 3: typical things that hold things in not holding things in anymore.

1103
00:50:15,360 --> 00:50:17,480
Speaker 3: I gotta go unless you want me peeing all over

1104
00:50:17,520 --> 00:50:21,200
Speaker 3: the place like bands.

1105
00:50:21,239 --> 00:50:24,240
Speaker 1: Babe, I'm yelling at you because my anus is torn.

1106
00:50:24,800 --> 00:50:28,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, well that's not torn, but your.

1107
00:50:30,400 --> 00:50:32,200
Speaker 2: Torn down to my anus.

1108
00:50:32,320 --> 00:50:36,200
Speaker 3: How would you feel if I if you yelling?

1109
00:50:36,800 --> 00:50:37,040
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1110
00:50:38,000 --> 00:50:39,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, come on?

1111
00:50:39,280 --> 00:50:46,800
Speaker 4: As John says that baby was John Fry.

1112
00:50:44,960 --> 00:50:47,200
Speaker 2: I did not think this would be the start of

1113
00:50:47,320 --> 00:50:52,080
Speaker 2: my crying journey. Postpartum was hard. I breastfed my daughter

1114
00:50:52,920 --> 00:50:56,160
Speaker 2: and that was incredibly hard, with cracked nippoles and no sleep.

1115
00:50:56,600 --> 00:50:58,840
Speaker 2: My husband would sleep so peacefully right next to me,

1116
00:50:58,960 --> 00:51:00,920
Speaker 2: and every night I would make him up, asking him

1117
00:51:00,920 --> 00:51:03,359
Speaker 2: to stay up with me sometimes because it would help

1118
00:51:03,400 --> 00:51:06,359
Speaker 2: me emotionally so much. I would understand if he had

1119
00:51:06,360 --> 00:51:09,040
Speaker 2: worked the next day, but he did not. He also

1120
00:51:09,120 --> 00:51:11,440
Speaker 2: did not have to do any housework because my cousins

1121
00:51:11,480 --> 00:51:14,120
Speaker 2: came to help with all of that. Still, every night

1122
00:51:14,160 --> 00:51:17,040
Speaker 2: he slept peacefully. During the day, he was mostly on

1123
00:51:17,080 --> 00:51:20,399
Speaker 2: his phone playing games. When we were friends, we used

1124
00:51:20,440 --> 00:51:22,600
Speaker 2: to gather with a lot of our friends to play

1125
00:51:22,680 --> 00:51:26,160
Speaker 2: poker for fun, and our friends continued that I stopped

1126
00:51:26,160 --> 00:51:29,360
Speaker 2: going to those gatherings after I gave birth. My husband

1127
00:51:29,480 --> 00:51:33,040
Speaker 2: kept going. When I asked him to not attend and

1128
00:51:33,120 --> 00:51:35,560
Speaker 2: to help me around the house with the baby, he

1129
00:51:35,600 --> 00:51:39,120
Speaker 2: would get mad and completely shut down. Two months postpartum,

1130
00:51:39,239 --> 00:51:41,759
Speaker 2: when I was not even completely healed, I was home

1131
00:51:41,800 --> 00:51:44,839
Speaker 2: with my baby. My husband said his friend asked him

1132
00:51:44,880 --> 00:51:48,040
Speaker 2: to help them move houses. I said, okay, I'll see

1133
00:51:48,040 --> 00:51:50,680
Speaker 2: you when you get back. I stayed home after getting

1134
00:51:50,719 --> 00:51:52,960
Speaker 2: my daughter ready for a bath. One of our friends

1135
00:51:53,000 --> 00:51:55,319
Speaker 2: dropped by, and I guess he felt really sad when

1136
00:51:55,320 --> 00:51:58,640
Speaker 2: he saw me. He blurted out, your husband isn't helping

1137
00:51:58,680 --> 00:52:01,640
Speaker 2: move the house. He's playing poker at so and so's house.

1138
00:52:02,120 --> 00:52:04,720
Speaker 1: He's been doing that a lot recently. The whole friend

1139
00:52:04,719 --> 00:52:06,600
Speaker 1: group has been telling him not to come, but.

1140
00:52:06,600 --> 00:52:09,400
Speaker 2: He refuses to listen. And that was when it clicked.

1141
00:52:09,920 --> 00:52:12,000
Speaker 2: All the time he said he was going somewhere he

1142
00:52:12,040 --> 00:52:14,080
Speaker 2: had lied to me. This friend was a high school

1143
00:52:14,120 --> 00:52:16,279
Speaker 2: classmate of mine, but it had been friends with my

1144
00:52:16,360 --> 00:52:20,120
Speaker 2: husband longer. My heart was broken. We had our fights,

1145
00:52:20,160 --> 00:52:22,400
Speaker 2: but I trusted him, and now that trust was gone.

1146
00:52:22,800 --> 00:52:25,200
Speaker 2: I forgot to mention that he left the business with

1147
00:52:25,280 --> 00:52:28,080
Speaker 2: my brother because he said it was suppressing his goals

1148
00:52:28,120 --> 00:52:31,560
Speaker 2: and dreams, and I supported that too. I confronted him

1149
00:52:31,640 --> 00:52:34,399
Speaker 2: and he was not apologetic. He said, I.

1150
00:52:34,480 --> 00:52:37,640
Speaker 1: Lied because you get angry when I'm honest with you.

1151
00:52:37,960 --> 00:52:40,200
Speaker 3: I'm sure you get angry when I tell you about

1152
00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:43,160
Speaker 3: all the terrible things I'm doing. That's why you get

1153
00:52:43,200 --> 00:52:46,799
Speaker 3: angry when I go to leave you and in your

1154
00:52:46,960 --> 00:52:50,759
Speaker 3: healing bodied and wounds and our new child so I

1155
00:52:50,760 --> 00:52:52,719
Speaker 3: could play poker. What else you want me to do?

1156
00:52:52,840 --> 00:52:54,520
Speaker 2: How am I supposed to be honest with you when

1157
00:52:54,520 --> 00:52:56,520
Speaker 2: the thing I'm doing is wrong, you get mad at me?

1158
00:52:57,520 --> 00:52:59,719
Speaker 2: I mean, honestly, So far, it sounds like this guy,

1159
00:52:59,840 --> 00:53:01,960
Speaker 2: it sounds like you got pregnant, and it sounds like

1160
00:53:02,080 --> 00:53:04,120
Speaker 2: he said all of those things because it was the

1161
00:53:04,200 --> 00:53:07,400
Speaker 2: right thing to say, and like not necessarily what he

1162
00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:09,960
Speaker 2: really felt. And then the baby showed up and everything

1163
00:53:10,000 --> 00:53:13,160
Speaker 2: became you know, went from like a delusion and said

1164
00:53:13,160 --> 00:53:15,279
Speaker 2: to like, Oh, I'm this is real and that is

1165
00:53:15,320 --> 00:53:18,160
Speaker 2: my child, and I'll be and I am his father

1166
00:53:18,360 --> 00:53:20,960
Speaker 2: and I'm married. And it feels like one of those

1167
00:53:20,960 --> 00:53:24,359
Speaker 2: things where what is it the avoidant or whatever, where

1168
00:53:24,400 --> 00:53:27,120
Speaker 2: it's like, yeah, he just avoided like really thinking or

1169
00:53:27,160 --> 00:53:29,080
Speaker 2: dealing with any of it, and then the baby came

1170
00:53:29,120 --> 00:53:30,520
Speaker 2: and he's like, oh wait, no, I'm stuck.

1171
00:53:30,760 --> 00:53:32,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like, oh shoot, this is like real.

1172
00:53:32,960 --> 00:53:35,080
Speaker 2: And now he's like taking it out on you emotionally

1173
00:53:35,560 --> 00:53:37,560
Speaker 2: and lashing out and being a bad husband, being a

1174
00:53:37,600 --> 00:53:41,040
Speaker 2: bad partner. I told him to get out of the

1175
00:53:41,120 --> 00:53:43,880
Speaker 2: room because I could not sleep next to him anymore.

1176
00:53:44,320 --> 00:53:47,560
Speaker 2: I was getting palpitations and anxiety just being near him,

1177
00:53:47,880 --> 00:53:50,879
Speaker 2: and I was barely sleeping anyway. He left the room

1178
00:53:50,960 --> 00:53:53,640
Speaker 2: and went into the next one. He ignored me for

1179
00:53:53,680 --> 00:53:57,799
Speaker 2: the next seven days. I gave him multiple chances and

1180
00:53:57,880 --> 00:53:59,920
Speaker 2: asked if he really had nothing to say to me,

1181
00:54:00,280 --> 00:54:03,480
Speaker 2: but he completely ignored me. He just went around to

1182
00:54:03,520 --> 00:54:06,240
Speaker 2: his friend's houses and slept in the room next door.

1183
00:54:06,640 --> 00:54:09,879
Speaker 2: What are his friends telling him? If this was my friend,

1184
00:54:09,880 --> 00:54:13,640
Speaker 2: I'd be like, stop being a scumbag, Yeah, knuckle down,

1185
00:54:14,080 --> 00:54:15,000
Speaker 2: what are you doing?

1186
00:54:15,160 --> 00:54:17,440
Speaker 3: I mean, not one friend was saying that, like everyone

1187
00:54:17,520 --> 00:54:19,480
Speaker 3: was telling him not to go to the poker Knights

1188
00:54:19,480 --> 00:54:21,960
Speaker 3: and stuff, but I guess they're not doing much about it.

1189
00:54:22,200 --> 00:54:24,400
Speaker 3: If everyone knew that this was happening and then he

1190
00:54:24,480 --> 00:54:28,440
Speaker 3: was lying to ope and like they weren't okay with it,

1191
00:54:28,440 --> 00:54:30,160
Speaker 3: but they also weren't doing anything about it.

1192
00:54:30,239 --> 00:54:31,799
Speaker 2: I mean, what do you do At some point if

1193
00:54:31,800 --> 00:54:33,160
Speaker 2: he just like shows up, He's like, well, we got

1194
00:54:33,160 --> 00:54:34,600
Speaker 2: to just make it a place he doesn't know where

1195
00:54:34,600 --> 00:54:36,759
Speaker 2: we're at anymore. I guess so because it's like what

1196
00:54:36,880 --> 00:54:39,120
Speaker 2: you're gonna just if he just shits down and won't leave,

1197
00:54:39,200 --> 00:54:41,520
Speaker 2: It's like, okay, we can either ruin the entire night,

1198
00:54:41,760 --> 00:54:44,200
Speaker 2: or we can just all try to pretend that mister

1199
00:54:44,239 --> 00:54:46,799
Speaker 2: scumbag over here isn't being a total scumbag and try

1200
00:54:46,800 --> 00:54:47,640
Speaker 2: to enjoy ourselves.

1201
00:54:47,800 --> 00:54:50,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, not invite him if he comes and be like, yo,

1202
00:54:50,719 --> 00:54:53,560
Speaker 3: no one wants you, hear, go go somewhere else.

1203
00:54:53,640 --> 00:54:57,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, if he shows up, it's like group wwe SmackDown

1204
00:54:57,160 --> 00:55:00,840
Speaker 2: like interventions all the time of like buddy, we all

1205
00:55:00,960 --> 00:55:03,680
Speaker 2: disapprove of europe behavior here about.

1206
00:55:04,000 --> 00:55:04,920
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1207
00:55:04,960 --> 00:55:08,360
Speaker 2: So that was my last straw. I decided I didn't

1208
00:55:08,360 --> 00:55:10,040
Speaker 2: want to be with him. I told him to get

1209
00:55:10,040 --> 00:55:12,000
Speaker 2: out of the house and that I would be serving

1210
00:55:12,080 --> 00:55:15,560
Speaker 2: him divorce papers soon. But he left, and three days

1211
00:55:15,600 --> 00:55:18,560
Speaker 2: later he came back at night begging me to forgive him.

1212
00:55:18,880 --> 00:55:21,680
Speaker 2: I said no. He came back again the next night

1213
00:55:21,960 --> 00:55:25,120
Speaker 2: and I said no again. All this time my head

1214
00:55:25,320 --> 00:55:28,399
Speaker 2: was full of him, day and night, thinking about what

1215
00:55:28,560 --> 00:55:30,680
Speaker 2: was going to happen next. Since we had the same

1216
00:55:30,680 --> 00:55:33,480
Speaker 2: circle of friends, I called around asking what he was

1217
00:55:33,520 --> 00:55:36,960
Speaker 2: doing during the day. I found out he was just

1218
00:55:37,200 --> 00:55:40,920
Speaker 2: hanging out with friends and sometimes playing snooker. Do we

1219
00:55:40,960 --> 00:55:43,880
Speaker 2: all know what snooker is? No, It's like a funny

1220
00:55:43,920 --> 00:55:51,960
Speaker 2: little version of billiards popular in Europe. Naha, I see,

1221
00:55:52,600 --> 00:55:54,600
Speaker 2: It's like bumper pool, I think, is what they call

1222
00:55:54,640 --> 00:55:57,680
Speaker 2: it in the States. That made my blood boil, But

1223
00:55:57,760 --> 00:56:00,919
Speaker 2: my heart is not that hard, and I forgave him.

1224
00:56:01,200 --> 00:56:03,520
Speaker 2: We went like this for another few months. He would

1225
00:56:03,560 --> 00:56:05,719
Speaker 2: change for a few days, then go back to the

1226
00:56:05,719 --> 00:56:08,879
Speaker 2: same behavior until I started bawling my eyes out. Then

1227
00:56:08,920 --> 00:56:11,680
Speaker 2: he would become good husband again for a few days.

1228
00:56:12,239 --> 00:56:15,520
Speaker 2: I felt stuck in a vicious cycle. After thinking hard,

1229
00:56:15,520 --> 00:56:18,239
Speaker 2: I decided to stop this because it was destroying my

1230
00:56:18,360 --> 00:56:21,719
Speaker 2: mental health. We went our separate ways. He came to

1231
00:56:21,719 --> 00:56:25,080
Speaker 2: see his daughter as much as he could, sometimes when

1232
00:56:25,160 --> 00:56:27,400
Speaker 2: I was at work and sometimes when I was home.

1233
00:56:27,840 --> 00:56:31,200
Speaker 2: He loved his daughter. I decided I wanted to study

1234
00:56:31,239 --> 00:56:33,880
Speaker 2: more and do my masters in Australia, and my father

1235
00:56:34,000 --> 00:56:38,440
Speaker 2: said he could help me financially. My husband came running back,

1236
00:56:38,760 --> 00:56:41,240
Speaker 2: asking if he could go with me, since our divorce

1237
00:56:41,280 --> 00:56:43,719
Speaker 2: had not gone through yet. He said he couldn't live

1238
00:56:43,760 --> 00:56:47,200
Speaker 2: without seeing his daughter. I refused. He then went to

1239
00:56:47,239 --> 00:56:50,759
Speaker 2: my brother, almost crying, asking him to please send him

1240
00:56:50,760 --> 00:56:53,840
Speaker 2: along as well. He promised to help pay seventy percent

1241
00:56:53,840 --> 00:56:56,600
Speaker 2: of my tuition fees. In our country, many people do this.

1242
00:56:57,040 --> 00:57:00,520
Speaker 2: Strangers get a marriage certificate to go to Australia together,

1243
00:57:00,600 --> 00:57:03,400
Speaker 2: and the dependent pays a percentage of the tuition fees,

1244
00:57:03,960 --> 00:57:08,080
Speaker 2: usually seventy thirty. My brother loves my daughter and encourage

1245
00:57:08,160 --> 00:57:11,080
Speaker 2: me to give him another chance, not to stay together,

1246
00:57:11,200 --> 00:57:13,680
Speaker 2: but just so my daughter could see her father whenever

1247
00:57:13,719 --> 00:57:16,680
Speaker 2: she wanted. He promised to pay seventy percent of the

1248
00:57:16,720 --> 00:57:19,120
Speaker 2: first semester, but at the very end he said he

1249
00:57:19,160 --> 00:57:21,720
Speaker 2: cannot get the money. What a shocker. I would have said,

1250
00:57:21,920 --> 00:57:24,600
Speaker 2: Oh boy, the guy who doesn't do anything and just

1251
00:57:24,680 --> 00:57:28,040
Speaker 2: hangs out at his buddy's places all day. Can't afford

1252
00:57:28,120 --> 00:57:30,520
Speaker 2: to actually pay. I didn't see that coming.

1253
00:57:30,680 --> 00:57:32,800
Speaker 3: Ah, no way, no way, Jose.

1254
00:57:33,120 --> 00:57:35,520
Speaker 2: This is just another case of OH, saying the thing

1255
00:57:35,640 --> 00:57:37,720
Speaker 2: that I need to say to get the thing that

1256
00:57:37,800 --> 00:57:41,840
Speaker 2: I want right now, without any consideration or care for

1257
00:57:42,280 --> 00:57:46,280
Speaker 2: the reality of the situation or how I actually feel

1258
00:57:46,400 --> 00:57:47,800
Speaker 2: or what will actually happen.

1259
00:57:47,960 --> 00:57:50,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean mean says get it in writing. I agree,

1260
00:57:50,760 --> 00:57:53,520
Speaker 3: get it in writing. Use this all against him in court.

1261
00:57:53,840 --> 00:57:56,880
Speaker 2: My father ended up paying one hundred percent of the

1262
00:57:56,920 --> 00:58:00,400
Speaker 2: first semester. We made an agreement my husband sorrow the

1263
00:58:00,400 --> 00:58:03,320
Speaker 2: amount he was supposed to pay from my father. Whenever

1264
00:58:03,360 --> 00:58:05,800
Speaker 2: he paid each semester, I would give him a receipt.

1265
00:58:06,200 --> 00:58:09,080
Speaker 2: If he did not pay the seventy percent, his property,

1266
00:58:09,200 --> 00:58:11,400
Speaker 2: a piece of land in the countryside would go to

1267
00:58:11,440 --> 00:58:15,160
Speaker 2: my father. With this agreement, we came to Australia. After

1268
00:58:15,320 --> 00:58:19,200
Speaker 2: reaching Australia, my husband paid the fees diligently. He tried

1269
00:58:19,280 --> 00:58:22,000
Speaker 2: multiple times to get back with me, and my stupid

1270
00:58:22,000 --> 00:58:25,920
Speaker 2: weak heart accepted him. We moved in together. He suggested

1271
00:58:26,080 --> 00:58:28,440
Speaker 2: he would pay one hundred percent of the fees. Since

1272
00:58:28,480 --> 00:58:30,959
Speaker 2: I had working restrictions as a student and I would

1273
00:58:30,960 --> 00:58:34,560
Speaker 2: pay the rent bills and home expenses. What he's just

1274
00:58:34,600 --> 00:58:37,680
Speaker 2: paying fees, So he's what he's paying, like the fifty

1275
00:58:37,720 --> 00:58:39,000
Speaker 2: dollars on top of all.

1276
00:58:38,920 --> 00:58:41,840
Speaker 3: Of that the least he could be paying.

1277
00:58:42,280 --> 00:58:45,000
Speaker 1: What are we talking about? Is that just Australian for

1278
00:58:45,040 --> 00:58:48,600
Speaker 1: something else? Or am I what don't know?

1279
00:58:48,920 --> 00:58:52,560
Speaker 2: That cannot be a sizable amount of money that he's

1280
00:58:52,600 --> 00:58:57,480
Speaker 2: saying when you're paying rent bills and home expenses, what

1281
00:58:57,560 --> 00:59:00,840
Speaker 2: are we talking about? So now we're the current situation.

1282
00:59:01,320 --> 00:59:04,200
Speaker 2: My husband does full time uber and drives for twelve

1283
00:59:04,240 --> 00:59:07,440
Speaker 2: hours a day. I work twenty four hours a week,

1284
00:59:07,760 --> 00:59:10,760
Speaker 2: which is the maximum I am allowed to. I also

1285
00:59:10,920 --> 00:59:12,919
Speaker 2: need to be home with my daughter in the morning

1286
00:59:13,000 --> 00:59:15,520
Speaker 2: and afternoon. I drop her at my cousin's house when

1287
00:59:15,560 --> 00:59:18,960
Speaker 2: I go to work. My husband comes home, sleeps, immediately,

1288
00:59:19,400 --> 00:59:22,800
Speaker 2: wakes up early, and goes driving again. When he's home

1289
00:59:22,840 --> 00:59:24,760
Speaker 2: and I try to talk about how things are going,

1290
00:59:24,880 --> 00:59:27,920
Speaker 2: he is always half hearted and mostly in a bad mood.

1291
00:59:28,400 --> 00:59:31,320
Speaker 2: I understand he must be tired, but I feel like

1292
00:59:31,440 --> 00:59:34,880
Speaker 2: I am walking on eggshells all the time. And we

1293
00:59:34,920 --> 00:59:38,200
Speaker 2: have a little bit left of this story time right

1294
00:59:38,240 --> 00:59:40,440
Speaker 2: now again from one of our own.

1295
00:59:40,640 --> 00:59:42,560
Speaker 3: And oh my gosh, I forgot about that.

1296
00:59:43,240 --> 00:59:47,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think I think I'm pegging this guy. As

1297
00:59:48,160 --> 00:59:57,320
Speaker 2: Susie talks a lot, pass pause, I said it, Susie

1298
00:59:57,320 --> 00:59:59,560
Speaker 2: talks a lot, yeah, which I thought that was gonna

1299
00:59:59,560 --> 01:00:00,120
Speaker 2: be the funny.

1300
01:00:02,680 --> 01:00:04,040
Speaker 4: And Angie made I got.

1301
01:00:07,560 --> 01:00:08,280
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1302
01:00:08,560 --> 01:00:11,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, but yeah, he just says whatever he says. He's

1303
01:00:11,400 --> 01:00:15,439
Speaker 2: got pre programmed responses, and then you never you don't

1304
01:00:15,520 --> 01:00:18,040
Speaker 2: know what's actually going on underneath that.

1305
01:00:18,640 --> 01:00:21,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, no thoughts in his brains.

1306
01:00:21,400 --> 01:00:22,680
Speaker 1: At least he loves his daughter.

1307
01:00:23,240 --> 01:00:27,320
Speaker 2: But if every other thing on the list is just

1308
01:00:27,600 --> 01:00:31,440
Speaker 2: negative negative, negative, negative, negative negative, Yeah, we can't be

1309
01:00:31,560 --> 01:00:36,880
Speaker 2: supporting him financially. We can't be supporting him emotionally or

1310
01:00:36,920 --> 01:00:39,880
Speaker 2: like having him be back with us. Yeah, if he

1311
01:00:39,960 --> 01:00:42,600
Speaker 2: wants to be in his daughter's life, then let that

1312
01:00:42,640 --> 01:00:45,080
Speaker 2: be the motivation that allows him to, I don't know,

1313
01:00:45,200 --> 01:00:46,400
Speaker 2: build one for himself.

1314
01:00:46,600 --> 01:00:50,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, just because he feels the emotion of love for

1315
01:00:50,120 --> 01:00:53,160
Speaker 3: his daughter doesn't really mean much in this situation. Like

1316
01:00:53,200 --> 01:00:56,120
Speaker 3: it's cool, that's great, but like if you did, then

1317
01:00:56,160 --> 01:00:59,760
Speaker 3: wouldn't you want to support that with your actions? Maybe?

1318
01:01:00,080 --> 01:01:04,240
Speaker 2: Hu, I am constantly worried about pissing him off and

1319
01:01:04,320 --> 01:01:07,600
Speaker 2: always doing things to make him happy. The only time

1320
01:01:07,640 --> 01:01:10,600
Speaker 2: he is jolly happy and talkative is when he wants

1321
01:01:10,680 --> 01:01:13,720
Speaker 2: the spose to sleep. When I communicate how I'm feeling,

1322
01:01:13,760 --> 01:01:17,200
Speaker 2: he either dismisses me or says I create everything in

1323
01:01:17,240 --> 01:01:21,280
Speaker 2: my head. We're like housemates. We don't even talk when

1324
01:01:21,320 --> 01:01:23,680
Speaker 2: sitting right next to each other. My cousins tell me

1325
01:01:23,760 --> 01:01:25,400
Speaker 2: to give him a break and that he's a good

1326
01:01:25,440 --> 01:01:28,800
Speaker 2: man because at least he's working hard to pay my fees. Yeah,

1327
01:01:28,960 --> 01:01:31,840
Speaker 2: because there's a threat of consequence behind it.

1328
01:01:32,400 --> 01:01:34,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, he's not doing it just out of the goodness

1329
01:01:34,640 --> 01:01:35,120
Speaker 3: of his heart.

1330
01:01:35,320 --> 01:01:37,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's doing it because he's like, I want to

1331
01:01:37,120 --> 01:01:37,960
Speaker 2: keep my land.

1332
01:01:38,520 --> 01:01:39,280
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1333
01:01:39,360 --> 01:01:42,800
Speaker 2: But when I calculated it, him paying one hundred percent

1334
01:01:42,840 --> 01:01:46,200
Speaker 2: of my fees is the same as him paying seventy

1335
01:01:46,240 --> 01:01:50,320
Speaker 2: percent because before he had to pay rent and other expenses.

1336
01:01:50,600 --> 01:01:53,040
Speaker 2: Now that he lives with me, he does not have

1337
01:01:53,120 --> 01:01:58,240
Speaker 2: those costs anymore. Am I the ale for feeling this way? No,

1338
01:01:58,840 --> 01:01:59,120
Speaker 2: I'm not.

1339
01:01:59,200 --> 01:01:59,480
Speaker 4: Why not?

1340
01:02:00,000 --> 01:02:03,440
Speaker 3: The whole fee paying thing is like one out of

1341
01:02:03,560 --> 01:02:07,320
Speaker 3: so many issues with this guy. He needs to deal

1342
01:02:07,360 --> 01:02:10,680
Speaker 3: with things on his own. He needs absolutely no help

1343
01:02:10,720 --> 01:02:12,920
Speaker 3: from you. Not the a hole, definitely not.

1344
01:02:13,320 --> 01:02:15,800
Speaker 2: You're not And if you don't want to stay in

1345
01:02:15,800 --> 01:02:16,680
Speaker 2: a relationship.

1346
01:02:16,840 --> 01:02:19,120
Speaker 1: You know, he'll probably try to be like you try

1347
01:02:19,200 --> 01:02:21,400
Speaker 1: to keep my daughter away. You're trying to take my

1348
01:02:21,600 --> 01:02:22,200
Speaker 1: daughter away.

1349
01:02:22,280 --> 01:02:24,440
Speaker 2: It's like, no, it's actually one hundred percent on you.

1350
01:02:24,520 --> 01:02:28,720
Speaker 2: Now how that process unfolds and how much time you'll

1351
01:02:28,720 --> 01:02:31,000
Speaker 2: be able to spend with her. But that is the

1352
01:02:31,160 --> 01:02:34,640
Speaker 2: end of that story, and we have some comments to read.

1353
01:02:35,120 --> 01:02:39,120
Speaker 2: These comments are from the video my fiance gets paid

1354
01:02:39,400 --> 01:02:40,280
Speaker 2: to cheat on me.

1355
01:02:41,560 --> 01:02:44,560
Speaker 3: This title sounds so familiar, but I do not remember

1356
01:02:44,680 --> 01:02:45,320
Speaker 3: this story.

1357
01:02:45,520 --> 01:02:48,080
Speaker 2: I feel like I remember it and it was posted

1358
01:02:48,160 --> 01:02:50,000
Speaker 2: July thirtieth, twenty twenty five.

1359
01:02:50,400 --> 01:02:51,280
Speaker 3: Wow, a long time ago.

1360
01:02:51,400 --> 01:02:55,800
Speaker 2: Here's the TLDR. O P notices her boyfriend acting distant

1361
01:02:55,840 --> 01:02:58,240
Speaker 2: and assumes he might be cheating, so she snoops through

1362
01:02:58,240 --> 01:03:01,840
Speaker 2: his phone and messages. Panicked by small clues, she confronts

1363
01:03:01,920 --> 01:03:06,640
Speaker 2: him and confesses everything. Instead of cheating, he reveals hidden money,

1364
01:03:06,800 --> 01:03:11,440
Speaker 2: stress from quitting smoking, and innocent explanations for every suspicious

1365
01:03:11,440 --> 01:03:15,360
Speaker 2: little detail. Shocked by his claim honesty and forgiveness, oh

1366
01:03:15,440 --> 01:03:19,360
Speaker 2: P realizes she misread everything and feels deep shame for

1367
01:03:19,480 --> 01:03:22,440
Speaker 2: doubting someone who handled it with grace. And if you're curious,

1368
01:03:22,480 --> 01:03:25,560
Speaker 2: to know the full story, you can go watch the

1369
01:03:25,640 --> 01:03:28,120
Speaker 2: full video. Wow, now I'm kind of curious.

1370
01:03:28,120 --> 01:03:29,720
Speaker 3: Now, Yeah, sounds mysterious.

1371
01:03:30,000 --> 01:03:31,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like, well, how did that end up?

1372
01:03:31,600 --> 01:03:33,720
Speaker 2: Positive A what a twist?

1373
01:03:33,920 --> 01:03:35,960
Speaker 4: And that does look like it's story two from that

1374
01:03:36,080 --> 01:03:37,480
Speaker 4: video if you're gonna go looking for it.

1375
01:03:37,560 --> 01:03:40,400
Speaker 1: Yes, Story two July thirtieth.

1376
01:03:40,200 --> 01:03:42,919
Speaker 4: And our first comments by k Dog sixty six' Ten

1377
01:03:43,640 --> 01:03:47,160
Speaker 4: in a committed, RELATIONSHIP i am a proponent of financial

1378
01:03:47,200 --> 01:03:51,160
Speaker 4: transparency and it is not okay to withhold information because

1379
01:03:51,200 --> 01:03:54,360
Speaker 4: of worry that your partner will feel. Stressed your partner

1380
01:03:54,440 --> 01:03:58,160
Speaker 4: is an adult and doesn't need parental. Protection and in this,

1381
01:03:58,240 --> 01:04:01,320
Speaker 4: story he was already becoming, grumpy so his financial situation

1382
01:04:01,760 --> 01:04:04,920
Speaker 4: was impacting her and their. RELATIONSHIP i don't remember this

1383
01:04:05,040 --> 01:04:08,280
Speaker 4: story at, all but THAT'S.

1384
01:04:07,920 --> 01:04:12,240
Speaker 3: I, mean it sounds like a pretty uh like succinct

1385
01:04:12,520 --> 01:04:15,880
Speaker 3: comment on that. Story, AGAIN i do not, remember but

1386
01:04:16,520 --> 01:04:18,440
Speaker 3: sounds like it was well worried.

1387
01:04:18,800 --> 01:04:21,880
Speaker 1: A little grumpler with. It AND i will, say as someone.

1388
01:04:21,680 --> 01:04:25,320
Speaker 2: Who's quit smoking multiple, times boyle, boy do you get

1389
01:04:25,360 --> 01:04:27,200
Speaker 2: a little? Grumpler oyle?

1390
01:04:27,280 --> 01:04:28,240
Speaker 1: Boy do you become a little?

1391
01:04:28,280 --> 01:04:28,720
Speaker 2: Grumpler?

1392
01:04:28,760 --> 01:04:29,760
Speaker 3: There it's part of.

1393
01:04:29,800 --> 01:04:35,080
Speaker 4: It commenter to Uh Lisa severn sixty seven eighty. Five last,

1394
01:04:35,080 --> 01:04:37,720
Speaker 4: story the guy was desperate enough to make a fake

1395
01:04:37,840 --> 01:04:40,920
Speaker 4: person and email to do surveys for extra. CASH i

1396
01:04:40,960 --> 01:04:42,200
Speaker 4: think it might be pretty.

1397
01:04:42,240 --> 01:04:46,600
Speaker 2: Bad. Yeah, yeah sometimes sometimes you got a hustle by

1398
01:04:46,600 --> 01:04:49,080
Speaker 2: pretending a cheat on your girlfriend for.

1399
01:04:49,320 --> 01:04:52,800
Speaker 3: Money, hmmm you're doing it for the, family don't you?

1400
01:04:52,880 --> 01:04:57,600
Speaker 4: Know comment three By Barrell williams for Y'all.

1401
01:04:57,600 --> 01:05:03,400
Speaker 3: Williams oh that's, great, sorry, y'all Will Little, known.

1402
01:05:03,200 --> 01:05:07,520
Speaker 4: But that threw me off sixty seven at thirty four.

1403
01:05:07,520 --> 01:05:11,560
Speaker 4: Minutes so this op needs hardcore therapy because she did

1404
01:05:11,600 --> 01:05:15,080
Speaker 4: all that without finding, anything yet labeled her boyfriend cheater

1405
01:05:15,280 --> 01:05:15,560
Speaker 4: in her.

1406
01:05:15,600 --> 01:05:17,479
Speaker 2: Title so, okay so.

1407
01:05:17,440 --> 01:05:19,560
Speaker 1: Maybe he didn't Even maybe he didn't even.

1408
01:05:19,600 --> 01:05:21,400
Speaker 4: CHEAT i don't think he. DID i think she just

1409
01:05:21,400 --> 01:05:21,760
Speaker 4: thought he.

1410
01:05:21,800 --> 01:05:23,520
Speaker 1: Did we'll have to all go watch.

1411
01:05:23,560 --> 01:05:24,920
Speaker 3: This, yeah this is like.

1412
01:05:25,520 --> 01:05:27,600
Speaker 1: Interesting we'll all watch this.

1413
01:05:27,800 --> 01:05:28,880
Speaker 2: Together, oh do it.

1414
01:05:28,960 --> 01:05:31,360
Speaker 4: Tonight and we got one more comment from cow about

1415
01:05:31,480 --> 01:05:31,840
Speaker 4: is god?

1416
01:05:32,200 --> 01:05:34,360
Speaker 2: WHAT i tried one.

1417
01:05:34,240 --> 01:05:36,280
Speaker 4: Of those survey websites to see if it was a,

1418
01:05:36,280 --> 01:05:38,960
Speaker 4: scam and it took about eight hours to earn a

1419
01:05:39,240 --> 01:05:43,640
Speaker 4: ten Dollars walmart gift. Card the card, worked, though so.

1420
01:05:43,680 --> 01:05:45,360
Speaker 3: You did it did?

1421
01:05:45,480 --> 01:05:46,280
Speaker 4: Work that's good.

1422
01:05:46,320 --> 01:05:49,560
Speaker 3: WORD i was thinking you like gave up halfway through

1423
01:05:49,640 --> 01:05:50,240
Speaker 3: or something like.

1424
01:05:50,280 --> 01:05:50,800
Speaker 1: That but that's.

1425
01:05:50,840 --> 01:05:54,280
Speaker 3: Awesome so he's putting in hours to get these gift,

1426
01:05:54,280 --> 01:05:59,600
Speaker 3: cards filling these, surveys in the, work hustling in that hard.

1427
01:05:59,680 --> 01:06:02,480
Speaker 3: Work he's working, harder not, smarter.

1428
01:06:02,760 --> 01:06:04,600
Speaker 1: Not smarter at, all not smarter at.

1429
01:06:04,640 --> 01:06:09,520
Speaker 3: All but that is the end of the, episode it. Seems,

1430
01:06:09,840 --> 01:06:12,760
Speaker 3: Yeah so if you love, us make sure to. Subscribe

1431
01:06:12,880 --> 01:06:14,880
Speaker 3: we love you and see you.

1432
01:06:14,960 --> 01:06:15,440
Speaker 2: Tomorrow