1 00:00:12,920 --> 00:00:14,920 Speaker 1: Welcome back to I Do Part two. 2 00:00:14,960 --> 00:00:18,560 Speaker 2: It's your celebrity mentor Kelly Ben Simone and you hear 3 00:00:18,680 --> 00:00:21,840 Speaker 2: us on every episode. We tell you listeners to call 4 00:00:21,920 --> 00:00:25,239 Speaker 2: us and email us. The podcast is for you. I'm 5 00:00:25,280 --> 00:00:28,600 Speaker 2: so excited today because it's exactly what we're doing, she 6 00:00:28,720 --> 00:00:32,000 Speaker 2: wrote to us. She's a real life gal in her 7 00:00:32,080 --> 00:00:35,159 Speaker 2: I Do Part two chapter and I can't. 8 00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:38,160 Speaker 1: Wait to get to know all about her. Welcome Kate 9 00:00:38,240 --> 00:00:41,120 Speaker 1: to the pod. Hi Kate, how are you? 10 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:44,559 Speaker 3: Bye? Thank you? Thank you so much for having me. 11 00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:47,320 Speaker 4: I love this subject so I actually I can't wait 12 00:00:47,400 --> 00:00:48,920 Speaker 4: to break all this down. 13 00:00:49,120 --> 00:00:49,880 Speaker 3: There's so much. 14 00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:50,800 Speaker 1: Oh my god. 15 00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:54,160 Speaker 2: Well, I'm so excited that you're open to this. So 16 00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:58,160 Speaker 2: first of all, congratulations being on the podcast. We have 17 00:00:58,280 --> 00:01:02,680 Speaker 2: a lot to deep dive deep into. So first of all, 18 00:01:03,800 --> 00:01:06,399 Speaker 2: how long have you been divorced? 19 00:01:06,640 --> 00:01:08,520 Speaker 3: I have been divorced three years. 20 00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:10,600 Speaker 1: And how long were you guys married? 21 00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:13,720 Speaker 3: We were married for seventeen and a half years. 22 00:01:14,520 --> 00:01:18,959 Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, Kate, that is crazy. Wait, how are 23 00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:19,480 Speaker 2: you feeling? 24 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:23,279 Speaker 4: I feel amazing right now. 25 00:01:23,560 --> 00:01:25,200 Speaker 3: I feel lighter. 26 00:01:26,680 --> 00:01:32,920 Speaker 4: It sounds cliche, but I truly smell the roses now, 27 00:01:32,959 --> 00:01:37,400 Speaker 4: even this morning out my window. They're the same roses 28 00:01:37,440 --> 00:01:42,200 Speaker 4: that have been there for sixteen years, and it's really 29 00:01:43,640 --> 00:01:49,600 Speaker 4: just recently, I'm just I take the little things in now. 30 00:01:49,720 --> 00:01:54,000 Speaker 4: I'm just so much more grateful, whether you know it's 31 00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:59,120 Speaker 4: the roses or being with friends. So yeah, I'm feeling great. 32 00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:02,560 Speaker 4: That's not to say there aren't many highs and lows 33 00:02:02,600 --> 00:02:02,760 Speaker 4: of this. 34 00:02:03,080 --> 00:02:05,440 Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, Oh my godness. Wait, so do you 35 00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:06,280 Speaker 1: do you have children? 36 00:02:06,600 --> 00:02:10,680 Speaker 3: I do. I have one sixteen year old, a boy. 37 00:02:11,360 --> 00:02:13,560 Speaker 1: You have a sixteen year old. You look like you 38 00:02:13,639 --> 00:02:15,519 Speaker 1: are sixteen. Oh my god. So you have a sixteen 39 00:02:15,600 --> 00:02:16,079 Speaker 1: year old. 40 00:02:16,040 --> 00:02:17,440 Speaker 3: And I'm forty nine. 41 00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:19,840 Speaker 1: You do not look forty nine. Gorgeous. 42 00:02:20,480 --> 00:02:23,440 Speaker 2: So you have a little boy sixteen. So he's in 43 00:02:23,480 --> 00:02:26,160 Speaker 2: the middle of his own maturation process. 44 00:02:26,520 --> 00:02:29,800 Speaker 1: So walk me through now that. 45 00:02:29,760 --> 00:02:33,080 Speaker 2: You're single after seventeen years, walk me through, like how 46 00:02:33,160 --> 00:02:35,160 Speaker 2: you're dating with a younger son. 47 00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:41,359 Speaker 4: I wouldn't be dating if he didn't give me the okay. 48 00:02:41,919 --> 00:02:46,919 Speaker 4: So it was at the a about two year mark, 49 00:02:47,080 --> 00:02:49,560 Speaker 4: and he had been out of town and I had 50 00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:53,880 Speaker 4: gone on a lunch date on one day and a 51 00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:56,239 Speaker 4: dinner date on on the other. 52 00:02:56,280 --> 00:02:58,880 Speaker 3: And when he asked me what I had. 53 00:02:58,639 --> 00:03:03,600 Speaker 4: Done over the weekend, it happened organically, and I told 54 00:03:03,639 --> 00:03:06,640 Speaker 4: him I had gone out on two dates and he said, 55 00:03:06,760 --> 00:03:09,240 Speaker 4: as long as they aren't weird and make me happy, 56 00:03:09,440 --> 00:03:13,120 Speaker 4: that he doesn't mind. Kind of a typical boy teenager. 57 00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:15,639 Speaker 4: I don't know what it would be like with a daughter. 58 00:03:15,919 --> 00:03:20,160 Speaker 4: I think maybe it would be harder. But my son 59 00:03:20,320 --> 00:03:28,120 Speaker 4: knows about me dating and he yes, he's very supportive. 60 00:03:28,360 --> 00:03:30,440 Speaker 2: So a lot of a lot of our listeners ask 61 00:03:30,560 --> 00:03:33,359 Speaker 2: about how to navigate dating with children. 62 00:03:33,600 --> 00:03:36,640 Speaker 1: And I also had I had very. 63 00:03:36,440 --> 00:03:40,040 Speaker 2: Young girls when I when I got separated and divorced 64 00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:41,240 Speaker 2: from my ex husband. 65 00:03:41,240 --> 00:03:43,800 Speaker 1: We were married for over ten years, and it. 66 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:48,200 Speaker 2: Was really difficult because on the one hand, I wanted, 67 00:03:49,080 --> 00:03:50,760 Speaker 2: you know, I always wanted a family for my family, 68 00:03:50,840 --> 00:03:53,040 Speaker 2: So I was like, oh my gosh, okay, how am I. 69 00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:54,760 Speaker 1: Going to what does this look like? What is this 70 00:03:55,080 --> 00:03:56,080 Speaker 1: you know, going to be like? 71 00:03:56,360 --> 00:03:59,880 Speaker 2: And I just I was so nervous to introduce that 72 00:04:00,160 --> 00:04:04,280 Speaker 2: to anyone for for a very very long time. And 73 00:04:05,320 --> 00:04:07,920 Speaker 2: you know, even when I would be introducing them, it 74 00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:09,640 Speaker 2: would be like a big group of people, so they 75 00:04:09,680 --> 00:04:12,520 Speaker 2: didn't even know like who was who. They're like, oh, yeah, 76 00:04:12,560 --> 00:04:15,600 Speaker 2: that's so one she works with it. They never really knew, 77 00:04:15,680 --> 00:04:18,320 Speaker 2: like what was what? So I love that you guys 78 00:04:18,360 --> 00:04:22,000 Speaker 2: are having this transparent conversation and I love that he's 79 00:04:22,040 --> 00:04:22,720 Speaker 2: supporting you. 80 00:04:22,800 --> 00:04:26,080 Speaker 1: I mean, that's so so sweet. It's so sweet. 81 00:04:26,440 --> 00:04:30,080 Speaker 4: Now having said that, he has not well, he has 82 00:04:30,160 --> 00:04:33,520 Speaker 4: not met anybody I've dated, because I would want to 83 00:04:33,560 --> 00:04:37,520 Speaker 4: be in love before I introduced him to anybody. So 84 00:04:37,640 --> 00:04:42,800 Speaker 4: I haven't even come close of wanting to introduce him 85 00:04:43,160 --> 00:04:47,320 Speaker 4: to anybody, even though I have met some wonderful people. 86 00:04:47,960 --> 00:04:48,680 Speaker 1: I love that. 87 00:04:49,240 --> 00:04:51,920 Speaker 2: And so just like, I mean, that's just a big statement, 88 00:04:52,080 --> 00:04:54,440 Speaker 2: like to being in love. I mean, are you are 89 00:04:54,440 --> 00:04:57,320 Speaker 2: you nervous about doing that at some point? 90 00:04:57,960 --> 00:05:01,719 Speaker 4: I'm not nervous because it hasn't even come close to that. 91 00:05:02,040 --> 00:05:06,880 Speaker 3: You're like, not even close. I've only been dating a year. 92 00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:08,880 Speaker 3: And when I say. 93 00:05:08,560 --> 00:05:10,720 Speaker 4: That, I mean it's not like I'm going on all 94 00:05:10,760 --> 00:05:14,480 Speaker 4: these dates all the time. They're just obviously being a 95 00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:17,160 Speaker 4: mom that that doesn't happen. 96 00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:21,160 Speaker 3: They're woven into your free time. 97 00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:26,320 Speaker 4: Yes, And so I am not scared or it does 98 00:05:26,440 --> 00:05:30,200 Speaker 4: not make me nervous because I know the person I 99 00:05:30,279 --> 00:05:36,000 Speaker 4: introduce him to it will be a long term relationship. 100 00:05:35,320 --> 00:05:39,800 Speaker 3: And I and I want to keep my dating separate 101 00:05:39,920 --> 00:05:41,159 Speaker 3: from him, right. 102 00:05:41,279 --> 00:05:43,880 Speaker 2: I appreciate that, and it's I mean, it's also difficult 103 00:05:43,880 --> 00:05:46,000 Speaker 2: too because he's going, you know, he's in that magituation 104 00:05:46,120 --> 00:05:49,359 Speaker 2: process and he's like, you know, hormonally, I'm sure, like 105 00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:51,560 Speaker 2: all over the place and he's looking at girls. 106 00:05:51,560 --> 00:05:53,520 Speaker 1: And then he's like, wait, my mom is dating. I'm dating. 107 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:54,080 Speaker 1: This is weird. 108 00:05:55,160 --> 00:05:57,840 Speaker 2: Wait I'm pros saying this. I'm like, wait, this is weird. 109 00:05:58,520 --> 00:06:00,320 Speaker 2: But I love how your handle it. 110 00:06:00,720 --> 00:06:03,080 Speaker 1: So how have you been dating? Have you been just 111 00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:03,760 Speaker 1: been meeting people? 112 00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:06,760 Speaker 2: Are you telling your friends, hey, I'm single, Like, what's 113 00:06:06,839 --> 00:06:08,440 Speaker 2: what's what have you been doing? 114 00:06:09,240 --> 00:06:12,159 Speaker 4: So the first two dates I went on, I was 115 00:06:12,200 --> 00:06:14,320 Speaker 4: set up through mutual friends. 116 00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:16,039 Speaker 1: Okay, how is that? 117 00:06:16,560 --> 00:06:20,279 Speaker 4: And I think it was so important for me to 118 00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:22,400 Speaker 4: rip the band aid. 119 00:06:22,720 --> 00:06:25,960 Speaker 3: It is very It is not for the faint of heart. 120 00:06:26,240 --> 00:06:27,600 Speaker 3: It is so difficult. 121 00:06:27,720 --> 00:06:30,359 Speaker 4: Even the getting ready process, something you do all the 122 00:06:30,440 --> 00:06:32,960 Speaker 4: time that you think nothing of it, and even when 123 00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:38,880 Speaker 4: they're not cute you it's just very nerve wracking. It 124 00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:40,159 Speaker 4: is very nerve wracking. 125 00:06:40,240 --> 00:06:44,359 Speaker 3: The going going with a total stranger. 126 00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:47,440 Speaker 2: You have to give yourself a bone. I mean it 127 00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:50,279 Speaker 2: has been two decades. I mean you were dressing for 128 00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:53,680 Speaker 2: your husband and now you're dressing for a day. It's 129 00:06:53,520 --> 00:06:57,560 Speaker 2: a totally kind of getting dressed. Okay, wait, tell me, like, 130 00:06:57,800 --> 00:06:59,440 Speaker 2: so what's your go to off it do you have? 131 00:06:59,520 --> 00:07:00,520 Speaker 2: Like okay, do you have a go. 132 00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:03,120 Speaker 3: To Oh well, it depends. 133 00:07:03,400 --> 00:07:07,960 Speaker 4: I live in the suburbs and I do love to 134 00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:13,120 Speaker 4: go into the city for day and so, and it 135 00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:17,520 Speaker 4: depends on the time of year and the location and 136 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:19,600 Speaker 4: what we're doing. 137 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:21,680 Speaker 2: It look great right now, So this is like, this 138 00:07:21,760 --> 00:07:23,200 Speaker 2: is like a vibe, This is like a thing. 139 00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:28,240 Speaker 4: This is I have my child's sporting event to go 140 00:07:28,280 --> 00:07:31,360 Speaker 4: to this afternoon, and it is going to be hot, 141 00:07:31,520 --> 00:07:32,840 Speaker 4: and I'm wearing the school colors. 142 00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:35,800 Speaker 2: Okay, well you look great. Green looks really good on you. 143 00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:37,920 Speaker 2: You know I always when people ask me, like what 144 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:41,400 Speaker 2: colors to what to wear? I always say, like, something colorful, 145 00:07:42,480 --> 00:07:45,600 Speaker 2: because you know, men really love red, they love color. 146 00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:47,200 Speaker 2: I mean the you know, women are always like I'm 147 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:49,600 Speaker 2: wearing black. Women don't necessarily. You know, one of my 148 00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:51,240 Speaker 2: friends who owned a store, she was like, are you 149 00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:53,560 Speaker 2: dressing for men? Are you dressing for women? And like, well, 150 00:07:53,560 --> 00:07:55,680 Speaker 2: when you're on date, you're dressing for men. So men 151 00:07:55,840 --> 00:07:59,720 Speaker 2: do tend to like more colorful things. You look you 152 00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:01,720 Speaker 2: look rate in color, so you should wear more color 153 00:08:01,800 --> 00:08:02,680 Speaker 2: that looks really good. 154 00:08:03,040 --> 00:08:03,400 Speaker 3: Thank you. 155 00:08:03,480 --> 00:08:06,520 Speaker 2: I'm just curious you're like a blazer girl or are 156 00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:08,200 Speaker 2: you like shirt? 157 00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:08,640 Speaker 3: Yes? 158 00:08:08,840 --> 00:08:16,200 Speaker 4: Uh, Cammi, Cammi blazer jeans. I went on a date 159 00:08:16,720 --> 00:08:21,160 Speaker 4: a couple of weeks ago. I love Stod and in fact, 160 00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:25,080 Speaker 4: this is Stad and I had a Stad skirt. 161 00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:26,800 Speaker 3: With just a tank. 162 00:08:26,920 --> 00:08:31,760 Speaker 4: I I like to keep it simple, classic, true, true 163 00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:36,440 Speaker 4: to my personality and what I what I like to wear, 164 00:08:36,640 --> 00:08:41,800 Speaker 4: you can't beat. For summer, I loved my white Chris 165 00:08:42,120 --> 00:08:45,800 Speaker 4: blouse tied a little bit with white jeans. And it 166 00:08:45,840 --> 00:08:50,880 Speaker 4: was a super casual place, so some sneakers honestly to 167 00:08:51,040 --> 00:08:54,280 Speaker 4: just make it fun because it was. It was a 168 00:08:54,360 --> 00:08:58,160 Speaker 4: meet and greet in the like around for four to 169 00:08:58,240 --> 00:08:59,520 Speaker 4: six hours, so to speak. 170 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:01,800 Speaker 3: So I also don't want to look too dolled up. 171 00:09:01,920 --> 00:09:03,560 Speaker 2: Right, But let's let's talk about that because I mean, 172 00:09:03,559 --> 00:09:06,079 Speaker 2: obviously you're really pretty. And so when you're doing these 173 00:09:06,120 --> 00:09:08,360 Speaker 2: meet and greek do you prefer like do you prefer dinner? 174 00:09:08,760 --> 00:09:11,359 Speaker 2: Do you prefer you know, having a cocktail? 175 00:09:11,520 --> 00:09:13,960 Speaker 1: Like? What is it? What exactly is a meat and greet? 176 00:09:17,080 --> 00:09:20,000 Speaker 1: Let me in on this. I need to know this one. 177 00:09:19,840 --> 00:09:22,480 Speaker 4: I called a meet and greet because he lived out 178 00:09:22,520 --> 00:09:27,480 Speaker 4: of town and he was picking up his daughter from college, 179 00:09:27,679 --> 00:09:30,960 Speaker 4: and so he was in town and he only had 180 00:09:31,360 --> 00:09:34,960 Speaker 4: a two hour window, which fantastic because we did not 181 00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:38,160 Speaker 4: do a FaceTime before, which I do like a FaceTime 182 00:09:38,200 --> 00:09:38,760 Speaker 4: before to. 183 00:09:38,720 --> 00:09:39,760 Speaker 3: Cut down on nerves. 184 00:09:40,120 --> 00:09:44,400 Speaker 4: Okay, so it was I mean obviously at his picture, 185 00:09:44,440 --> 00:09:46,760 Speaker 4: but you never know with the picture. So that's why 186 00:09:46,840 --> 00:09:49,120 Speaker 4: I called it a meet and greek because it was. 187 00:09:49,400 --> 00:09:53,840 Speaker 4: There was a hard stop, which was amazing because check 188 00:09:53,880 --> 00:09:54,320 Speaker 4: the box. 189 00:09:54,400 --> 00:09:55,319 Speaker 3: I got a date. 190 00:09:55,160 --> 00:09:59,440 Speaker 4: In I met somebody new and I was home in 191 00:09:59,480 --> 00:10:02,640 Speaker 4: my JAMMI and all comfy and watching a show. 192 00:10:02,920 --> 00:10:08,320 Speaker 3: You know, it wasn't late because I did. I didn't 193 00:10:08,360 --> 00:10:09,559 Speaker 3: go out with him again. 194 00:10:09,640 --> 00:10:13,360 Speaker 2: It was a My goal is to wait wait before wait, 195 00:10:13,360 --> 00:10:15,040 Speaker 2: wait before you tell me your goal. I just I'm 196 00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:17,640 Speaker 2: obsessed with this. So because I love how you are. 197 00:10:17,679 --> 00:10:20,400 Speaker 2: I love that you're like, Okay, I'm dating, this is 198 00:10:20,440 --> 00:10:22,880 Speaker 2: me dating. This is I'm going to dress the part. 199 00:10:22,960 --> 00:10:25,160 Speaker 2: I'm going to be one hundred percent there for it 200 00:10:25,200 --> 00:10:27,240 Speaker 2: with my meet and greet, and then I have a 201 00:10:27,240 --> 00:10:29,240 Speaker 2: hard stop because I need to go home to my 202 00:10:29,559 --> 00:10:31,840 Speaker 2: jammys and to my favorite show. 203 00:10:32,840 --> 00:10:36,240 Speaker 3: He gave me this out of having the hard stop. 204 00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:37,640 Speaker 1: Oh he did what he's saying. 205 00:10:37,840 --> 00:10:41,200 Speaker 4: He was in town before we set up the date. 206 00:10:41,720 --> 00:10:44,440 Speaker 4: He was in town to pick up his daughter from college, 207 00:10:44,480 --> 00:10:46,800 Speaker 4: so he had to pick her up at a certain 208 00:10:46,840 --> 00:10:50,000 Speaker 4: time at college. So we even take out for her 209 00:10:50,080 --> 00:10:53,000 Speaker 4: because she was going to be hungry, and I'm like, oh, 210 00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:54,680 Speaker 4: she would like this, she would like that. It's like, 211 00:10:57,040 --> 00:11:02,040 Speaker 4: so I didn't have to have that anxietiety of wanting 212 00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:04,080 Speaker 4: to high tail it and get out of there, because 213 00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:05,439 Speaker 4: it was a lovely. 214 00:11:06,720 --> 00:11:10,720 Speaker 3: I have the mentality on I think people. 215 00:11:11,440 --> 00:11:16,240 Speaker 4: I mean, they're great people, And am I like super 216 00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:19,480 Speaker 4: attracted to them or am I feeling sparks? No, But 217 00:11:19,559 --> 00:11:23,120 Speaker 4: I think to sit down to a nice meal and 218 00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:28,800 Speaker 4: get to know somebody that I find interesting, I enjoy, 219 00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:31,640 Speaker 4: I enjoy the time. I just don't want to necessarily 220 00:11:31,679 --> 00:11:38,960 Speaker 4: go again or you know, continue continue, you know, to 221 00:11:39,040 --> 00:11:40,520 Speaker 4: explore it further, so to speak. 222 00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:43,959 Speaker 2: So having said that, what do you think has changed 223 00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:46,240 Speaker 2: with the dating scene, Because obviously it's been two decades 224 00:11:46,240 --> 00:11:47,640 Speaker 2: since you've been on these dates, and all of a 225 00:11:47,679 --> 00:11:50,040 Speaker 2: sudden you're like doing these meet and greets and face times. 226 00:11:50,640 --> 00:11:52,240 Speaker 1: So what do you think has changed? 227 00:11:52,520 --> 00:11:57,000 Speaker 4: We are all checking boxes right, No, when I was young, 228 00:11:57,640 --> 00:12:02,600 Speaker 4: it is so boy me girl, girl thinks boy is 229 00:12:02,760 --> 00:12:06,360 Speaker 4: super hot, and the boys into the girl. And you've 230 00:12:06,679 --> 00:12:10,920 Speaker 4: met because you've gone to the same college and your 231 00:12:10,960 --> 00:12:14,520 Speaker 4: sorority you know does things with his fraternity, or you've 232 00:12:14,559 --> 00:12:20,320 Speaker 4: met during young adulting and you meet you know, you meet, oh, 233 00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:23,240 Speaker 4: you meet at work, and it's based. 234 00:12:22,880 --> 00:12:26,120 Speaker 1: On like Jess, chemical attraction. 235 00:12:28,320 --> 00:12:30,280 Speaker 3: Connecting. You're not. 236 00:12:32,440 --> 00:12:37,800 Speaker 4: Mentally going through your checkboxes because this part too so 237 00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:42,520 Speaker 4: to speak of, which I am super excited for. 238 00:12:43,160 --> 00:12:47,240 Speaker 3: But at the same time, if it doesn't happen, I am. 239 00:12:47,360 --> 00:12:50,120 Speaker 4: I really am at peace for that because I don't 240 00:12:50,160 --> 00:12:51,679 Speaker 4: know if it will. Well. 241 00:12:51,720 --> 00:12:53,560 Speaker 2: Also, that's good though you have to stay I mean, 242 00:12:53,559 --> 00:12:55,880 Speaker 2: I think that one of the most important parts of 243 00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:59,560 Speaker 2: this I do era is that you're staying calm and 244 00:12:59,559 --> 00:13:04,840 Speaker 2: that you're celebrating yourself and all of these new possibilities 245 00:13:04,840 --> 00:13:07,840 Speaker 2: and opportunities. I mean, you never know, Like I mean, 246 00:13:08,040 --> 00:13:11,640 Speaker 2: I think that's one thing for me because I called 247 00:13:11,640 --> 00:13:13,800 Speaker 2: off my wedding last year, four days before I supposed 248 00:13:13,800 --> 00:13:16,760 Speaker 2: to get married, and so you know, for me, I'm 249 00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:17,480 Speaker 2: not thank you. 250 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:21,480 Speaker 3: I mean, it still feels like that could feel like 251 00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:22,280 Speaker 3: a divorce. 252 00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:24,679 Speaker 2: Like yeah, it just was like very It just made 253 00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:27,880 Speaker 2: me feel very really really like very insecure. But I 254 00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:30,319 Speaker 2: think one of the things that I've learned through this 255 00:13:30,360 --> 00:13:33,520 Speaker 2: whole process is that I'm just more relaxed with who 256 00:13:33,600 --> 00:13:37,079 Speaker 2: I am and like I want I obviously want men 257 00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:38,800 Speaker 2: to you know, be. 258 00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:40,839 Speaker 1: Attracted me in all these things, but I also want 259 00:13:40,880 --> 00:13:42,240 Speaker 1: to just feel good myself. 260 00:13:43,559 --> 00:13:46,559 Speaker 2: I'm just very I'm like very happy with that. Okay, 261 00:13:46,559 --> 00:13:47,640 Speaker 2: what kind of guys do you like? 262 00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:49,040 Speaker 1: Let's get into it. 263 00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:52,200 Speaker 2: Come on, cake, give me the teeth, come on, Okay, 264 00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:53,360 Speaker 2: what kind of guys do you like? 265 00:13:54,040 --> 00:13:55,840 Speaker 1: So younger older? 266 00:13:56,000 --> 00:14:01,000 Speaker 3: Brunet Speaking of older, I mentioned that I'm forty nine. 267 00:14:01,280 --> 00:14:04,160 Speaker 2: Well, I mean, you're not old, no one, you're forty nine, 268 00:14:04,240 --> 00:14:05,800 Speaker 2: But I don't like the whole older. 269 00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:09,360 Speaker 1: I mean, have you seen yourself in the mirror? You're gorgeous, Like, okay, ages, 270 00:14:09,440 --> 00:14:12,600 Speaker 1: it's a number. I know, you're gorgeous. You could date anyone. 271 00:14:12,840 --> 00:14:17,280 Speaker 4: The only people that I have been out with are 272 00:14:17,640 --> 00:14:19,800 Speaker 4: fifty eight, fifty fifty nine. 273 00:14:19,840 --> 00:14:21,880 Speaker 3: And there was one guy that on his. 274 00:14:21,880 --> 00:14:24,440 Speaker 4: Profile said he was fifty four. To his credit, he 275 00:14:24,480 --> 00:14:27,080 Speaker 4: looked dang good for sixty. And when I asked him 276 00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:29,360 Speaker 4: on his date, you know, I weave it in like. 277 00:14:29,240 --> 00:14:30,280 Speaker 3: Oh, when's your birthday? 278 00:14:30,680 --> 00:14:31,040 Speaker 1: Oh wow? 279 00:14:31,480 --> 00:14:33,720 Speaker 4: And then I say, oh, I just turned forty nine, 280 00:14:33,800 --> 00:14:34,560 Speaker 4: Like how old are you? 281 00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:36,200 Speaker 3: He absolutely wouldn't answer it. 282 00:14:36,240 --> 00:14:40,160 Speaker 4: Well, it's called Google, Like, I just I'm positive he 283 00:14:40,320 --> 00:14:40,840 Speaker 4: was sixty. 284 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:44,320 Speaker 2: So okay, but hold on, So how do you care 285 00:14:44,520 --> 00:14:46,200 Speaker 2: if he's not his age? 286 00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:46,400 Speaker 3: You? 287 00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:47,760 Speaker 1: I mean, I don't, you know, I don't. 288 00:14:47,920 --> 00:14:49,000 Speaker 3: I really don't. 289 00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:54,440 Speaker 4: I just feel I'm not saying that it couldn't work. 290 00:14:54,720 --> 00:14:56,800 Speaker 2: Do you think these guys are like nervous about their age? 291 00:14:56,960 --> 00:14:59,160 Speaker 2: I mean, do you think the tables have turned are 292 00:14:59,200 --> 00:15:02,200 Speaker 2: like we like, are we now? The ones that are like, 293 00:15:02,280 --> 00:15:04,320 Speaker 2: oh my god, why are you lying at your age? 294 00:15:04,520 --> 00:15:06,960 Speaker 1: Because women were like the men are like, they're lying 295 00:15:06,960 --> 00:15:08,960 Speaker 1: about their age. It's like, and so are you? 296 00:15:09,920 --> 00:15:12,200 Speaker 3: Yeah. This it hasn't happened once. 297 00:15:12,240 --> 00:15:14,520 Speaker 4: It's happened a couple times, and at least one guy 298 00:15:14,560 --> 00:15:16,720 Speaker 4: he totally owned up. 299 00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:17,760 Speaker 3: What app? 300 00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:20,640 Speaker 4: Was it one of the apps? I think if you 301 00:15:20,760 --> 00:15:22,160 Speaker 4: I don't know what it is? He said it was 302 00:15:22,200 --> 00:15:24,400 Speaker 4: the AP's phalt. Okay, let's give him the benefit of 303 00:15:24,440 --> 00:15:28,000 Speaker 4: the doubt. It was the apsphalt, but I think ten 304 00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:33,120 Speaker 4: years older than I am, I would prefer like I would. 305 00:15:32,920 --> 00:15:34,960 Speaker 3: Prefer fifty two, fifty three, fifty. 306 00:15:34,720 --> 00:15:37,800 Speaker 4: Four, fifty five, but I don't know sixty for me 307 00:15:38,040 --> 00:15:41,480 Speaker 4: at forty nine, I'm not saying never. 308 00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:47,360 Speaker 3: But you know, it's just interesting that it has all 309 00:15:47,520 --> 00:15:49,720 Speaker 3: been that age group. 310 00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:53,120 Speaker 4: And then I think a lot about Okay, well, as 311 00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:56,040 Speaker 4: the years go on, does that mean then my dating 312 00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:58,120 Speaker 4: pool is going to be Like if I'm in my 313 00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:00,600 Speaker 4: mid fifties, is it then going to be the sixties? 314 00:16:00,640 --> 00:16:03,000 Speaker 3: And that's kind of overwhelming and scary to think about. 315 00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:05,760 Speaker 2: Okay, but let's so, now that we've talked about the 316 00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:08,680 Speaker 2: guys that are around your age, what about the guys. 317 00:16:08,440 --> 00:16:09,200 Speaker 1: That are younger? 318 00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:11,080 Speaker 3: Never tried it? 319 00:16:13,360 --> 00:16:13,920 Speaker 1: You never know? 320 00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:17,720 Speaker 3: Right on the apps, some of the. 321 00:16:19,240 --> 00:16:21,960 Speaker 4: Some of the younger so forty forty four, some of 322 00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:24,880 Speaker 4: them they haven't had kids yet and they want kids, 323 00:16:24,880 --> 00:16:27,440 Speaker 4: and that for me is right sales. 324 00:16:27,880 --> 00:16:40,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, Okay, what about then if that's the case, Well, 325 00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:42,840 Speaker 2: what about guys that just don't want kids? 326 00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:45,200 Speaker 1: What about if they're like younger than what about their 327 00:16:45,280 --> 00:16:48,400 Speaker 1: late thirties. There's a lot of way when to stay younger. 328 00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:51,440 Speaker 3: I don't if they haven't had kids. 329 00:16:51,600 --> 00:16:54,640 Speaker 1: You a lot of energy to your fun. You're like vivacious. 330 00:16:54,960 --> 00:16:57,360 Speaker 3: I am, yes, so you need someone that. 331 00:16:57,320 --> 00:17:00,320 Speaker 1: Has good energy, positive but. 332 00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:04,280 Speaker 4: I am looking for somebody that's family oriented. Of course, 333 00:17:04,400 --> 00:17:07,560 Speaker 4: the normal characteristics that we want in all the humans 334 00:17:07,600 --> 00:17:16,960 Speaker 4: that we surround ourselves with, kind, loving, consistent values, values. 335 00:17:16,600 --> 00:17:19,280 Speaker 3: Me and lets me be myself. 336 00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:22,800 Speaker 4: One of the people I dated and he was fantastic, 337 00:17:22,880 --> 00:17:28,359 Speaker 4: there just wasn't the physical connection for me. I love 338 00:17:28,640 --> 00:17:35,600 Speaker 4: how I was completely unfiltered. I just he let me 339 00:17:35,760 --> 00:17:39,960 Speaker 4: be me and he made me feel like a million bucks. 340 00:17:41,119 --> 00:17:44,480 Speaker 1: But that sounds amazing. I love that. I know, like 341 00:17:44,520 --> 00:17:47,480 Speaker 1: a million bucks. I know you should feel like that. 342 00:17:47,880 --> 00:17:53,120 Speaker 4: I know. But for the long term, it just there 343 00:17:53,200 --> 00:17:56,040 Speaker 4: wasn't the chemistry even though he So that's a great question. 344 00:17:56,119 --> 00:17:58,800 Speaker 4: Even though he made me feel this way, there just 345 00:17:58,920 --> 00:18:02,040 Speaker 4: wasn't the chemistry where I can show you a picture 346 00:18:03,480 --> 00:18:05,399 Speaker 4: from an event we went to. 347 00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:09,480 Speaker 2: But anyway, yeah, so what about have you been only 348 00:18:09,520 --> 00:18:13,120 Speaker 2: been dating divorce men or single dads or what's been like. 349 00:18:13,200 --> 00:18:18,360 Speaker 4: Your So I actually have been out on two dates 350 00:18:18,440 --> 00:18:26,040 Speaker 4: with two separate widowska rest have been divorce single dads, 351 00:18:26,240 --> 00:18:29,360 Speaker 4: and I do really connect with. 352 00:18:30,960 --> 00:18:35,199 Speaker 3: The single dads because I love kids. 353 00:18:35,240 --> 00:18:38,359 Speaker 4: I love well, particularly because it's the stage of life 354 00:18:38,480 --> 00:18:42,600 Speaker 4: I'm in. I love hearing all about the teens, all 355 00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:45,880 Speaker 4: about the young I call it the adulting stage, which 356 00:18:46,440 --> 00:18:50,000 Speaker 4: is like the second four years, you know, post college. 357 00:18:50,640 --> 00:18:53,080 Speaker 4: These kids who are living in New York, like living 358 00:18:53,119 --> 00:18:53,879 Speaker 4: their best life. 359 00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:55,760 Speaker 3: I'm I'm all about that. 360 00:18:56,119 --> 00:19:01,760 Speaker 4: So I definitely connect with men on on that level. 361 00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:04,320 Speaker 1: What was it like to date a widower? What was 362 00:19:04,359 --> 00:19:04,760 Speaker 1: that like? 363 00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:12,560 Speaker 4: They were both lovely? The first widower was only my 364 00:19:12,680 --> 00:19:17,200 Speaker 4: second date? Whoa he was only my second date. 365 00:19:17,520 --> 00:19:18,960 Speaker 1: Did you know that from the start that he was 366 00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:20,800 Speaker 1: a widower or you found that out? 367 00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:27,240 Speaker 3: Yes, it was a setup and it just felt like 368 00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:28,720 Speaker 3: yet he was. 369 00:19:28,640 --> 00:19:31,720 Speaker 4: A type of guy I definitely, you know, should like 370 00:19:31,720 --> 00:19:34,880 Speaker 4: like just a good a good family man, a good person. 371 00:19:36,040 --> 00:19:37,960 Speaker 3: He actually lived. 372 00:19:39,080 --> 00:19:41,480 Speaker 4: About twenty five minutes away, so I had I had, 373 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:45,280 Speaker 4: I had background, which is nice versus when you're when 374 00:19:45,280 --> 00:19:48,439 Speaker 4: you're on on the apps, and so it was a 375 00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:51,399 Speaker 4: it was a great It was a great date. 376 00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:52,920 Speaker 3: The end of the date, did I. 377 00:19:52,840 --> 00:19:55,080 Speaker 4: Oh so on the way home when they put mints 378 00:19:55,160 --> 00:19:57,080 Speaker 4: in their mouth? Because I was such a newbie on this, 379 00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:01,040 Speaker 4: but I kind of thought it what. 380 00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:04,760 Speaker 3: God, why is he in his mouth? And why is 381 00:20:04,840 --> 00:20:08,800 Speaker 3: he offering me a mint? Even though I enjoyed myself, 382 00:20:08,840 --> 00:20:09,080 Speaker 3: I have. 383 00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:12,639 Speaker 4: No desire, you know, to kiss him, and so I 384 00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:16,560 Speaker 4: just give kind of the halfway hug, you know, goodbye, 385 00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:21,560 Speaker 4: and and he asked if I would want to do 386 00:20:21,640 --> 00:20:26,000 Speaker 4: something again, and because I'm being open minded, you know, 387 00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:27,520 Speaker 4: I say sure. 388 00:20:28,640 --> 00:20:32,920 Speaker 3: And then he. 389 00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:34,720 Speaker 4: Reaches back out just to like ask a question, and 390 00:20:34,760 --> 00:20:37,240 Speaker 4: I answer the question. And then I went through the 391 00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:42,000 Speaker 4: phase of wait, why isn't he texted in a couple 392 00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:44,680 Speaker 4: of days? But what is going on? I wasn't that 393 00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:47,280 Speaker 4: into him, So it was a little bit of a 394 00:20:47,520 --> 00:20:48,880 Speaker 4: wake up call, I have to say. 395 00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:55,520 Speaker 3: And then he continued texting, Wait. 396 00:20:55,359 --> 00:20:58,280 Speaker 2: So hold on, So he didn't text you for a 397 00:20:58,280 --> 00:20:59,960 Speaker 2: couple of days, and then he started up again. 398 00:21:00,320 --> 00:21:08,239 Speaker 4: Correct, correct, And he asked a question. And I'm a 399 00:21:08,320 --> 00:21:11,600 Speaker 4: detailed person and I kind of didn't know the whole 400 00:21:11,760 --> 00:21:15,199 Speaker 4: I'm not calling it a game, but there is. When 401 00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:19,320 Speaker 4: you're used to being with somebody for so long, your 402 00:21:19,359 --> 00:21:23,119 Speaker 4: text can be long. And it's just one thing that 403 00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:26,560 Speaker 4: I taught myself that in the beginning, like keep. 404 00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:27,919 Speaker 3: It short, keep it short. 405 00:21:28,760 --> 00:21:31,480 Speaker 4: And he asked me like what I was doing or 406 00:21:31,760 --> 00:21:36,600 Speaker 4: something like that, and I went pretty detailed and I 407 00:21:36,680 --> 00:21:38,639 Speaker 4: never heard from him again. To be honest, now I 408 00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:42,720 Speaker 4: did find out he had been seeing somebody before he 409 00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:44,719 Speaker 4: took me out, I think is the story. 410 00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:47,560 Speaker 2: Okay, so you were basically goes to by a widower, 411 00:21:47,560 --> 00:21:48,320 Speaker 2: But what shouldn't he. 412 00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:53,640 Speaker 4: Be like I was, Annie has a dad, Bob. 413 00:21:53,640 --> 00:21:55,560 Speaker 2: Hold on, but don't you think don't you think I 414 00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:58,800 Speaker 2: should be like, oh, feel okay to be like you 415 00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:01,359 Speaker 2: know their girlfriends say to them if you're going to 416 00:22:01,440 --> 00:22:03,280 Speaker 2: go on a date, just people like and just say 417 00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:06,680 Speaker 2: thank you so much, like you know, you know, I'm 418 00:22:06,760 --> 00:22:07,640 Speaker 2: just dating right now. 419 00:22:07,680 --> 00:22:09,680 Speaker 1: I love seeing you. I mean, I just think it's 420 00:22:09,680 --> 00:22:10,720 Speaker 1: so I think it's. 421 00:22:10,600 --> 00:22:12,679 Speaker 2: Just I don't know, it hurts my like hurts my 422 00:22:12,720 --> 00:22:15,359 Speaker 2: feelings if someone regard, even in work or anything, if 423 00:22:15,359 --> 00:22:16,119 Speaker 2: someone doesn't respond. 424 00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:17,920 Speaker 1: So I'm always like, thank you so much, like it 425 00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:20,640 Speaker 1: was really nice seeing you. Even if I'm interested. 426 00:22:20,359 --> 00:22:24,280 Speaker 2: Or not interested in anything, I'm always I always respond. 427 00:22:24,560 --> 00:22:26,200 Speaker 2: And I feel like at our age, like we're of 428 00:22:26,280 --> 00:22:30,400 Speaker 2: the generation where we do like do that and but wow, I. 429 00:22:30,320 --> 00:22:32,600 Speaker 3: Can't agree with you more. 430 00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:36,520 Speaker 4: I never got and it is uncomfortable and you do 431 00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:41,000 Speaker 4: feel bad, but it's much better to just say, hey, 432 00:22:41,480 --> 00:22:42,840 Speaker 4: I had a really good time. 433 00:22:43,640 --> 00:22:45,960 Speaker 2: By the way, Like, you never know who you're going 434 00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:48,359 Speaker 2: to meet from somebody, So if I don't necessarily you 435 00:22:48,359 --> 00:22:50,119 Speaker 2: know what I was when I when I'm dating, I'm like, 436 00:22:50,680 --> 00:22:52,000 Speaker 2: I don't know who I'm going to meet. 437 00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:54,120 Speaker 1: And that's part of it too. 438 00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:56,280 Speaker 2: Just because you're going in a date doesn't mean you're 439 00:22:56,320 --> 00:23:01,040 Speaker 2: like locked in for life. Let's talk about quicker or 440 00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:06,720 Speaker 2: slower in terms of the physical aspect. Do you think 441 00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:09,520 Speaker 2: these guys are taking these you know, popping them int, 442 00:23:09,920 --> 00:23:12,919 Speaker 2: going for the kiss and then pull them in tight 443 00:23:13,720 --> 00:23:17,600 Speaker 2: and trying to like have a deeper connection. 444 00:23:18,160 --> 00:23:24,200 Speaker 4: I'm very good with my boundaries, very good with my boundaries. 445 00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:27,359 Speaker 3: Do I feel like they would probably? 446 00:23:27,720 --> 00:23:30,480 Speaker 4: Yes, would they want to take it further right off 447 00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:33,080 Speaker 4: the bat, one hundred and ten percent. 448 00:23:33,680 --> 00:23:34,400 Speaker 3: I just. 449 00:23:36,720 --> 00:23:38,920 Speaker 1: Can I interview you every day because you're amazing. 450 00:23:39,280 --> 00:23:40,240 Speaker 3: And that's why. 451 00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:46,080 Speaker 4: That's why after a couple of dates, it's not necessarily 452 00:23:46,680 --> 00:23:50,120 Speaker 4: that they're putting the pressure the pressure, but. 453 00:23:51,760 --> 00:23:52,200 Speaker 3: I don't. 454 00:23:52,359 --> 00:23:55,520 Speaker 4: I don't want them to continue taking me out if 455 00:23:55,800 --> 00:23:59,240 Speaker 4: I am just enjoying the company and I think they're 456 00:23:59,320 --> 00:24:06,280 Speaker 4: a really great person because ultimately, you know, it should 457 00:24:06,600 --> 00:24:13,080 Speaker 4: lead to a physical, you know, connection, And if I'm 458 00:24:13,080 --> 00:24:16,159 Speaker 4: not going, if I don't see myself going down that path, 459 00:24:16,359 --> 00:24:19,000 Speaker 4: then we shouldn't continue on the dates. 460 00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:21,359 Speaker 3: And another thing I learned is. 461 00:24:22,440 --> 00:24:27,600 Speaker 4: Sometimes when I see if I can't picture myself ever 462 00:24:27,880 --> 00:24:31,439 Speaker 4: staying the night in their space, if I feel like 463 00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:39,960 Speaker 4: I wouldn't, it's happened well a couple of times. If 464 00:24:39,960 --> 00:24:44,400 Speaker 4: I can't say, see myself feeling comfortable staying the night, 465 00:24:44,880 --> 00:24:47,520 Speaker 4: then I shouldn't continue. 466 00:24:48,080 --> 00:24:50,000 Speaker 1: Well, you also have like a really nice aesthetic. 467 00:24:50,080 --> 00:24:54,479 Speaker 2: I mean, your vibe is so great, and so I 468 00:24:54,520 --> 00:24:59,600 Speaker 2: think that's probably part, Like you're clearly visual. But I 469 00:24:59,640 --> 00:25:03,159 Speaker 2: think it interesting because I have I've got I mean 470 00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:05,240 Speaker 2: I've gone on dates and like some guys I'll kiss 471 00:25:05,240 --> 00:25:07,280 Speaker 2: and some guys I won't. And like I one guy 472 00:25:07,359 --> 00:25:09,439 Speaker 2: be like, oh, yeah, we were like we went on 473 00:25:09,480 --> 00:25:11,000 Speaker 2: in a couple of days after I was like, oh yeah, 474 00:25:11,080 --> 00:25:13,240 Speaker 2: you know first day, Yeah, she wouldn't kiss me. And 475 00:25:13,240 --> 00:25:15,399 Speaker 2: I'm like, why is this common knowledge? Why is everyone 476 00:25:15,440 --> 00:25:17,879 Speaker 2: to know this? And it's just it's just something that 477 00:25:18,080 --> 00:25:20,439 Speaker 2: happens or doesn't happen. I don't think it's like a 478 00:25:20,560 --> 00:25:25,399 Speaker 2: rule or there's any kind of like relationship, you know code, 479 00:25:26,080 --> 00:25:28,040 Speaker 2: but like there's some people that you want to and 480 00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:31,600 Speaker 2: some people just don't. Yes, I don't know, but I'm 481 00:25:31,600 --> 00:25:34,439 Speaker 2: not going to bring mints. I'm sorry, right, I'm not 482 00:25:34,440 --> 00:25:35,320 Speaker 2: going to mince in my bag. 483 00:25:36,680 --> 00:25:37,440 Speaker 3: It's happened. 484 00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:40,920 Speaker 4: Like when they take out the gum, the gum or 485 00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:42,119 Speaker 4: the mints and then offer you. 486 00:25:42,200 --> 00:25:43,159 Speaker 3: I'm like, oh gosh. 487 00:25:43,240 --> 00:25:44,960 Speaker 1: First of all, mint makes me sneeze, so that would 488 00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:49,080 Speaker 1: be awful. I'd be like you, you be like Kelly, 489 00:25:49,119 --> 00:25:52,800 Speaker 1: you're sneezing. What's going on over there? Like your friends 490 00:25:52,800 --> 00:25:53,720 Speaker 1: are they setting you up? 491 00:25:53,960 --> 00:25:54,919 Speaker 3: Or so? 492 00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:57,560 Speaker 4: The last time I was set up, I kind of 493 00:25:57,640 --> 00:26:02,760 Speaker 4: kicked off my dating with two setups, and ever since then, 494 00:26:04,920 --> 00:26:07,639 Speaker 4: nobody I haven't been set up. I live in a 495 00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:12,240 Speaker 4: small community where really nobody is divorced, and that is 496 00:26:12,280 --> 00:26:16,960 Speaker 4: not an overstatement. My best friends, my whole friend group, 497 00:26:17,080 --> 00:26:20,399 Speaker 4: which I call my angel team, are all married and 498 00:26:20,480 --> 00:26:22,399 Speaker 4: being with them is my happy place. 499 00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:24,200 Speaker 3: And I'm super lucky. 500 00:26:24,119 --> 00:26:28,199 Speaker 4: That I am still you know, included, even though I 501 00:26:28,280 --> 00:26:32,960 Speaker 4: don't have a significant other. One thing that I've liked 502 00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:37,880 Speaker 4: about dating is it's made me not feel alone by 503 00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:38,919 Speaker 4: being divorced. 504 00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:41,440 Speaker 3: Since there aren't divorced people in my community. 505 00:26:42,160 --> 00:26:46,600 Speaker 4: Yeah, I've learned there there are great people out there 506 00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:47,560 Speaker 4: that are divorced. 507 00:26:48,119 --> 00:26:51,919 Speaker 1: There are there are, let's talk there are. First of all, 508 00:26:51,960 --> 00:26:53,560 Speaker 1: there are a lot of great people out there. 509 00:26:53,960 --> 00:26:57,919 Speaker 2: Just because you went through you know, you had a 510 00:26:57,960 --> 00:27:00,600 Speaker 2: marriage and you are divorced, doesn't mean that you're like, 511 00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:03,720 Speaker 2: you know, there's a new opportunity for you. And I 512 00:27:03,760 --> 00:27:06,159 Speaker 2: love the way you're handling I really like, I'm like, 513 00:27:06,880 --> 00:27:07,800 Speaker 2: you're very cool. 514 00:27:08,680 --> 00:27:11,200 Speaker 1: I am not as cool as you, not at all. 515 00:27:11,320 --> 00:27:12,919 Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my god, just. 516 00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:14,879 Speaker 3: Looking at you, I totally disagree. 517 00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:16,359 Speaker 1: I am so not cool. 518 00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:20,760 Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, persons there there are my feelings or 519 00:27:20,760 --> 00:27:22,600 Speaker 2: they're like I'm like, oh my god, that person just 520 00:27:22,600 --> 00:27:24,359 Speaker 2: thinks I'm a show pony and they don't want to 521 00:27:24,400 --> 00:27:26,440 Speaker 2: get to know me or whatever. You know, all these 522 00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:29,720 Speaker 2: stupid insecurities that I that I have. Let's go through 523 00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:32,280 Speaker 2: your dating profile says the worst. 524 00:27:32,960 --> 00:27:35,359 Speaker 1: I mean, like, hats offt you know, thank you. 525 00:27:35,359 --> 00:27:37,560 Speaker 2: I appreciate that you are too. Let's go into your 526 00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:39,960 Speaker 2: dating profile because I need to hear. Okay, let's talk 527 00:27:40,000 --> 00:27:44,280 Speaker 2: about the photos. You can just describe like, like your photos. 528 00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:48,160 Speaker 4: So nothing professional. Just that was on the way Christmas Eve. 529 00:27:48,560 --> 00:27:50,840 Speaker 4: Do you want me to read my prompt or do. 530 00:27:50,880 --> 00:27:53,119 Speaker 3: You want yes, I want to hear yeah, Or do 531 00:27:53,160 --> 00:27:54,000 Speaker 3: you want to see. 532 00:27:54,080 --> 00:27:56,879 Speaker 1: No, No, I could barely see, but just that your puppy. 533 00:27:57,040 --> 00:27:58,600 Speaker 1: Or yeah, oh. 534 00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:01,440 Speaker 4: That's I'm a baker and the last one I did 535 00:28:01,840 --> 00:28:02,639 Speaker 4: to show up? 536 00:28:04,440 --> 00:28:05,920 Speaker 3: Oh I love Yes, I loved to bake. 537 00:28:06,240 --> 00:28:08,440 Speaker 1: Oh my god, and you're and you're a baker, Oh 538 00:28:08,480 --> 00:28:08,800 Speaker 1: my god. 539 00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:12,240 Speaker 2: That's I can make food for my children, but I 540 00:28:12,280 --> 00:28:13,639 Speaker 2: don't make food for other people. 541 00:28:13,880 --> 00:28:17,040 Speaker 4: It is my way of showing love to friends and family. 542 00:28:17,320 --> 00:28:19,520 Speaker 1: Okay, okay, first of all, I love that. What's the 543 00:28:19,560 --> 00:28:20,480 Speaker 1: app Which one is it? 544 00:28:21,400 --> 00:28:27,480 Speaker 4: This one's hinge, but I'm I'm on Hinge and the league. 545 00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:29,040 Speaker 3: I wish you could see my pictures. 546 00:28:29,240 --> 00:28:31,080 Speaker 1: I would love to see that. Wait we read me? 547 00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:36,560 Speaker 4: Yes, So I have been told. I have been told 548 00:28:36,600 --> 00:28:42,040 Speaker 4: on dates that I match my profile perfectly. 549 00:28:42,280 --> 00:28:44,000 Speaker 3: I have been I have been told that. 550 00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:45,120 Speaker 1: That's so good. 551 00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:48,560 Speaker 4: So it says, uh, the prompt is my greatest strength. 552 00:28:48,640 --> 00:28:52,480 Speaker 4: It says I'm sweet, grounded, nurturing, fit and fun, full 553 00:28:52,520 --> 00:28:54,360 Speaker 4: of life and excited for the next chapter. 554 00:28:54,560 --> 00:28:56,080 Speaker 3: I love showing up for the people. 555 00:28:56,120 --> 00:29:00,400 Speaker 4: I care for sharing, laughter and building meaningful connect actions. 556 00:29:01,400 --> 00:29:07,160 Speaker 4: And then the second prompts is my simple pleasures. It's 557 00:29:07,200 --> 00:29:10,040 Speaker 4: a little repetitive because I say spending time with the 558 00:29:10,080 --> 00:29:13,960 Speaker 4: people I love, sharing connection, laughter and memories, and even 559 00:29:14,000 --> 00:29:18,400 Speaker 4: finding humor in life's challenges. I'm drawn to beautiful surroundings 560 00:29:18,440 --> 00:29:22,960 Speaker 4: and thoughtful details. And then I name a couple of 561 00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:25,320 Speaker 4: my favorite favorite places. 562 00:29:25,520 --> 00:29:26,680 Speaker 3: And then the next. 563 00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:30,120 Speaker 4: Picture is me at one of my favorite places, and 564 00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:32,040 Speaker 4: that's the full body shot. 565 00:29:32,280 --> 00:29:33,800 Speaker 1: Where is it? Where is your favorite place? 566 00:29:35,680 --> 00:29:37,640 Speaker 3: Uh No, it's ConA on Hawaii. 567 00:29:37,880 --> 00:29:39,400 Speaker 1: Oh my god, Hawaii, Oh my god. 568 00:29:39,480 --> 00:29:42,040 Speaker 3: I love that, And it says what if I told 569 00:29:42,120 --> 00:29:42,680 Speaker 3: you that? 570 00:29:44,480 --> 00:29:48,840 Speaker 4: And I respond with my life feels feels full in 571 00:29:48,920 --> 00:29:51,120 Speaker 4: all the best ways, but I can't wait to share 572 00:29:51,240 --> 00:29:56,240 Speaker 4: experiences with someone special alongside my wonderful family and friends, 573 00:29:56,720 --> 00:30:02,040 Speaker 4: which is speaks to I hope that I could meet 574 00:30:02,080 --> 00:30:05,480 Speaker 4: somebody that I fit into their life and they fit 575 00:30:05,560 --> 00:30:09,000 Speaker 4: into my life, which is circles back to when I 576 00:30:09,040 --> 00:30:13,000 Speaker 4: was saying, you asked me what's different now between dating 577 00:30:13,200 --> 00:30:16,240 Speaker 4: so long ago. 578 00:30:15,200 --> 00:30:20,200 Speaker 3: And when you're young. You're not thinking about, oh can 579 00:30:20,640 --> 00:30:23,200 Speaker 3: I fit into his life? And will he fit into 580 00:30:23,280 --> 00:30:25,040 Speaker 3: my life? I don't know about you. I never thought 581 00:30:25,080 --> 00:30:27,480 Speaker 3: of that when I was in my twenties. 582 00:30:28,160 --> 00:30:30,000 Speaker 1: Now, I was just like, who is this person? 583 00:30:31,320 --> 00:30:34,800 Speaker 4: And then another thing that I love to think about 584 00:30:35,320 --> 00:30:39,240 Speaker 4: is when you're young, it is all about the wedding 585 00:30:39,320 --> 00:30:44,320 Speaker 4: and the baby, the baby or baby or babies, and 586 00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:50,400 Speaker 4: I never thought about what life is going to be 587 00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:54,560 Speaker 4: like as an empty nester. And obviously I never thought 588 00:30:54,600 --> 00:31:00,440 Speaker 4: about I'm going to be building a relationship and it's 589 00:31:00,640 --> 00:31:04,640 Speaker 4: not about. 590 00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:05,360 Speaker 3: Making a family. 591 00:31:06,120 --> 00:31:09,880 Speaker 4: And I just think that's very interesting to think about 592 00:31:10,040 --> 00:31:19,280 Speaker 4: because the relationship isn't necessarily going to be around, you know, 593 00:31:19,680 --> 00:31:23,040 Speaker 4: all the schedules and all the stuff that comes comes 594 00:31:23,040 --> 00:31:23,600 Speaker 4: with kids. 595 00:31:24,240 --> 00:31:27,720 Speaker 2: That is so interesting because when I when I was younger, 596 00:31:27,720 --> 00:31:30,040 Speaker 2: I was a model and I married someone that was 597 00:31:30,080 --> 00:31:32,640 Speaker 2: a lot older than I was, and we didn't have 598 00:31:32,720 --> 00:31:35,640 Speaker 2: a traditional wedding. I didn't even go on a honeymoon. 599 00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:39,880 Speaker 2: There was no like I just was pregnant one day. 600 00:31:40,640 --> 00:31:43,360 Speaker 2: There was no planning, there was no like. All those 601 00:31:43,400 --> 00:31:47,719 Speaker 2: things that you're talking about, I just never experienced. And 602 00:31:47,800 --> 00:31:51,760 Speaker 2: I think that's one reason why I'm opposite, like I 603 00:31:51,800 --> 00:31:53,360 Speaker 2: am looking for a family. 604 00:31:53,400 --> 00:31:56,200 Speaker 1: For my family, I'm looking for the whole. 605 00:31:56,360 --> 00:31:59,200 Speaker 2: That's what I'm like, I'm always like, oh, this is 606 00:31:59,240 --> 00:32:03,760 Speaker 2: going to be great because I want that family. I 607 00:32:04,120 --> 00:32:06,320 Speaker 2: just always wanted and I've just you know, raised my 608 00:32:06,400 --> 00:32:09,440 Speaker 2: kids on my own for so long. I've been single 609 00:32:09,520 --> 00:32:11,920 Speaker 2: for so long for the right reasons, not for the 610 00:32:11,920 --> 00:32:15,520 Speaker 2: wrong reasons. And so it's like it's so different, we're 611 00:32:15,560 --> 00:32:18,480 Speaker 2: so different, But okay, what are your We're so different, 612 00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:20,640 Speaker 2: but we're very similar in a lot of ways. What 613 00:32:20,680 --> 00:32:23,160 Speaker 2: are your deal breakers and your non negotiables? 614 00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:30,480 Speaker 4: Deal breakers and non negotiables would be if you're an alcoholic, 615 00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:33,640 Speaker 4: that's that's a that's a deal breaker, right, that's no 616 00:32:34,160 --> 00:32:38,320 Speaker 4: smoking is it is a deal breaker. I mean that's 617 00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:41,640 Speaker 4: just something like on the app that you can kind. 618 00:32:41,360 --> 00:32:43,840 Speaker 3: Of filter filter through. 619 00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:47,760 Speaker 4: Yeah, I know myself and I know so many other 620 00:32:48,080 --> 00:32:51,840 Speaker 4: women out there. We do put a lot of effort 621 00:32:52,320 --> 00:32:56,480 Speaker 4: into how we look and how we present ourselves. 622 00:32:57,120 --> 00:32:59,640 Speaker 3: And so if if I were to show up. 623 00:32:59,520 --> 00:33:05,600 Speaker 4: On a day and you know, he's not presenting. 624 00:33:04,840 --> 00:33:09,360 Speaker 3: Well, it's you know, it could be a deal breaker. 625 00:33:09,360 --> 00:33:10,920 Speaker 3: I'm just saying, if you. 626 00:33:10,880 --> 00:33:13,160 Speaker 1: Know, right you are on department the same effort that 627 00:33:13,160 --> 00:33:13,880 Speaker 1: you're putting forth. 628 00:33:13,960 --> 00:33:15,840 Speaker 3: I it doesn't have to be the same. I mean, 629 00:33:15,880 --> 00:33:18,120 Speaker 3: I might put in a little too much. 630 00:33:18,280 --> 00:33:21,240 Speaker 1: What about like religion, politics. 631 00:33:21,720 --> 00:33:25,360 Speaker 4: I'm very open minded on religion and politics. 632 00:33:25,400 --> 00:33:27,960 Speaker 3: Those aren't deal breakers for me. 633 00:33:28,240 --> 00:33:31,000 Speaker 1: What if he has younger kids, like younger, younger like 634 00:33:31,320 --> 00:33:32,920 Speaker 1: seven six? 635 00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:36,280 Speaker 3: Yes, I don't see it. 636 00:33:37,160 --> 00:33:42,000 Speaker 4: I don't see it, but I would definitely be open minded. 637 00:33:41,800 --> 00:33:44,160 Speaker 3: To a meet and greet. 638 00:33:46,200 --> 00:33:49,280 Speaker 2: With a hard stop and then some fuzzy slippers and 639 00:33:49,280 --> 00:33:50,760 Speaker 2: then a really great TV show. 640 00:34:00,720 --> 00:34:01,680 Speaker 1: Why to get married again? 641 00:34:02,000 --> 00:34:03,959 Speaker 4: I think if I'm in a long term if I'm 642 00:34:04,000 --> 00:34:08,320 Speaker 4: in a long term relationship, I think it would bug 643 00:34:08,400 --> 00:34:13,759 Speaker 4: me for years and years to have the title of girlfriend. 644 00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:17,080 Speaker 3: So I do see myself as a wife again. Someday. 645 00:34:17,160 --> 00:34:20,320 Speaker 4: I would love to have that role. I'm not afraid 646 00:34:20,360 --> 00:34:26,600 Speaker 4: of it. Right, but again, it feels very far away, right. 647 00:34:26,719 --> 00:34:30,320 Speaker 4: Quick question for you. So you mentioned you are looking 648 00:34:30,480 --> 00:34:32,080 Speaker 4: to create a new family. 649 00:34:32,160 --> 00:34:37,920 Speaker 3: Correct. Yes, so I would say it. 650 00:34:37,920 --> 00:34:40,799 Speaker 4: It doesn't feel like it feels like a dream that 651 00:34:40,920 --> 00:34:44,840 Speaker 4: I could find this. But my dream would be to 652 00:34:45,960 --> 00:34:50,759 Speaker 4: find somebody that adds to my son's life as well. 653 00:34:51,000 --> 00:34:54,759 Speaker 2: Oh one, But I mean like a person that's like like, 654 00:34:55,560 --> 00:34:57,719 Speaker 2: for lack of a better word, like a community builder. 655 00:34:57,840 --> 00:35:00,560 Speaker 2: Like I mean, I dated this one guy that was 656 00:35:00,640 --> 00:35:02,080 Speaker 2: just like it was only me. 657 00:35:02,280 --> 00:35:04,759 Speaker 1: I'm like, no, no, no, no, I have two daughters, Like 658 00:35:04,800 --> 00:35:07,840 Speaker 1: it's not just me, it's all of us. Uh. 659 00:35:07,880 --> 00:35:10,200 Speaker 2: And that just I mean I quickly because I just 660 00:35:10,280 --> 00:35:11,880 Speaker 2: was like, I can't do that. But then again, I 661 00:35:12,320 --> 00:35:15,279 Speaker 2: dated someone that was about my same age and he 662 00:35:15,320 --> 00:35:17,680 Speaker 2: had a daughter and he just was so disconnected from 663 00:35:17,680 --> 00:35:18,120 Speaker 2: his daughter. 664 00:35:18,160 --> 00:35:19,080 Speaker 1: I mean, his daughter had. 665 00:35:19,000 --> 00:35:21,080 Speaker 2: Like she was this beautiful little nineteen year old and 666 00:35:21,120 --> 00:35:22,719 Speaker 2: she had like mismatched. 667 00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:25,839 Speaker 1: Socks, and I'm like, what is going on? Like that 668 00:35:26,120 --> 00:35:27,560 Speaker 1: kind of stuff does not work for me. 669 00:35:27,760 --> 00:35:31,719 Speaker 3: So I couldn't. I couldn't connect with anybody like that. 670 00:35:31,840 --> 00:35:34,680 Speaker 4: Any of the dates I've gone on, I've been so 671 00:35:34,760 --> 00:35:37,920 Speaker 4: impressed with the type of dads they are, and some 672 00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:40,040 Speaker 4: of them went on multiple dates. 673 00:35:40,440 --> 00:35:42,560 Speaker 1: Okay, what if they say bad things about their ex wife? 674 00:35:42,840 --> 00:35:43,640 Speaker 1: Does that bother you? 675 00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:44,680 Speaker 3: Yes? 676 00:35:45,600 --> 00:35:46,799 Speaker 1: Yes, thank you? 677 00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:49,799 Speaker 3: Yes, yes I hate that. Yeah. 678 00:35:50,000 --> 00:35:51,920 Speaker 2: It's like that's like that to me as a dale breaker, 679 00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:54,480 Speaker 2: when you talk badly about your ex, because what are 680 00:35:54,480 --> 00:35:55,319 Speaker 2: you going to say about me? 681 00:35:56,040 --> 00:35:57,200 Speaker 1: It's like a friend, do you know what I mean? 682 00:35:57,239 --> 00:35:58,840 Speaker 1: When they say something mean about something, You're like, m. 683 00:36:00,360 --> 00:36:03,280 Speaker 3: I just don't think you need to go there, right. 684 00:36:03,120 --> 00:36:05,960 Speaker 2: It didn't work out. You know, we uncoupled. I love 685 00:36:06,000 --> 00:36:07,719 Speaker 2: the I love the Gwyneth Palott we uncoupled. 686 00:36:08,200 --> 00:36:11,759 Speaker 1: It's very by. I mean just I just love that 687 00:36:11,800 --> 00:36:13,920 Speaker 1: you make cookies. I have to tell your cookies. So 688 00:36:16,239 --> 00:36:18,200 Speaker 1: I'm like, all I'm thinking about is talking to the cookies. 689 00:36:18,239 --> 00:36:21,120 Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my god, So you've made dating for 690 00:36:21,160 --> 00:36:23,320 Speaker 1: a year. What's the biggest thing you've learned about yourself? 691 00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:28,440 Speaker 4: The best version of myself is my true, genuine self 692 00:36:28,600 --> 00:36:34,960 Speaker 4: I am. I really am in my skin, and I 693 00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:37,960 Speaker 4: think I was self conscious going into the dating world 694 00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:44,680 Speaker 4: being a stay at home mom, and I am proud 695 00:36:44,719 --> 00:36:48,720 Speaker 4: of that. I own it. It's so much a part 696 00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:52,759 Speaker 4: of who I am. Not to say that I won't 697 00:36:52,800 --> 00:36:56,840 Speaker 4: have a part two once my son goes to college 698 00:36:57,480 --> 00:37:01,359 Speaker 4: and I could discover new things. And I don't know 699 00:37:01,400 --> 00:37:05,040 Speaker 4: what that part too is, because I'm still focused. 700 00:37:04,520 --> 00:37:09,160 Speaker 3: You know, on the part where he you know, he 701 00:37:09,400 --> 00:37:11,680 Speaker 3: is still living at home. 702 00:37:12,200 --> 00:37:15,880 Speaker 2: It's really important to just like we were talking about before, 703 00:37:16,000 --> 00:37:18,759 Speaker 2: like just about you know, feeling good and you know 704 00:37:18,880 --> 00:37:22,120 Speaker 2: it doesn't matter how long it takes, and you know 705 00:37:22,160 --> 00:37:23,839 Speaker 2: what you have to remember, you know, people people when 706 00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:28,200 Speaker 2: people talk about unraveling a relationship. They're not talking about 707 00:37:28,400 --> 00:37:33,000 Speaker 2: the relationship. They're talking about, you know, emotionally, like talking 708 00:37:33,040 --> 00:37:35,640 Speaker 2: about that person, the memories that you had with that person, 709 00:37:35,840 --> 00:37:37,759 Speaker 2: kind of being able to put those in a in 710 00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:40,000 Speaker 2: a you know, that was a really nice part of 711 00:37:40,040 --> 00:37:42,839 Speaker 2: my life box and not like where you are now. 712 00:37:42,960 --> 00:37:45,000 Speaker 1: Box. It's just it's not easy. 713 00:37:45,280 --> 00:37:47,640 Speaker 2: And you know, people were like, I just want to 714 00:37:47,640 --> 00:37:49,680 Speaker 2: be great and fun and sexy. 715 00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:53,600 Speaker 1: Well it's like, you know, people, there's it's like damage control. Now. 716 00:37:53,600 --> 00:37:54,880 Speaker 2: It's like you got to like, you know, do the 717 00:37:54,920 --> 00:37:58,040 Speaker 2: things that you really really love and focus on your son. 718 00:37:58,239 --> 00:38:00,239 Speaker 1: And I mean, I'm excited for you. 719 00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:03,760 Speaker 2: I'm really excited You're going to be great. 720 00:38:04,600 --> 00:38:09,960 Speaker 4: One thing that my mom pointed out is dating hat. 721 00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:14,840 Speaker 4: Everybody that I have gone out with has has boosted 722 00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:18,560 Speaker 4: my confidence. So what it has it has been. It 723 00:38:18,640 --> 00:38:19,760 Speaker 4: has been healthy. 724 00:38:20,520 --> 00:38:21,040 Speaker 1: I love that. 725 00:38:21,280 --> 00:38:24,560 Speaker 2: I can't so now for anyone listening right now who's 726 00:38:24,600 --> 00:38:27,120 Speaker 2: scared to start dating again, like what advice would you 727 00:38:27,120 --> 00:38:28,960 Speaker 2: give them? 728 00:38:29,000 --> 00:38:34,520 Speaker 4: You kind of need practice and that it's okay to 729 00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:38,200 Speaker 4: go out with that person that isn't going to be 730 00:38:38,480 --> 00:38:39,359 Speaker 4: the man. 731 00:38:39,239 --> 00:38:42,040 Speaker 3: Of your dreams. Just start getting comfortable with. 732 00:38:43,520 --> 00:38:47,920 Speaker 4: Be sharing a meal with with somebody and having conversation 733 00:38:48,200 --> 00:38:56,239 Speaker 4: and learning to talk about yourself and to ask questions 734 00:38:56,520 --> 00:38:59,320 Speaker 4: without it being an interview. 735 00:38:59,360 --> 00:39:01,000 Speaker 3: And that's one I'm saying. 736 00:39:01,200 --> 00:39:06,279 Speaker 4: That I caught on Real Fast. I don't like it 737 00:39:06,320 --> 00:39:09,600 Speaker 4: when I'm being interviewed by by the date. 738 00:39:10,120 --> 00:39:11,120 Speaker 1: I have another question for you. 739 00:39:11,200 --> 00:39:15,120 Speaker 2: I have all these questions for you, like Kate's brand brand, 740 00:39:16,320 --> 00:39:17,919 Speaker 2: I know you'd be great like rapid Fire. 741 00:39:18,640 --> 00:39:21,240 Speaker 1: Have you ever asked a guy out in real life? 742 00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:29,640 Speaker 4: No, because I am traditional in my relationships and I 743 00:39:29,680 --> 00:39:32,719 Speaker 4: do have in my head you know that if if 744 00:39:32,760 --> 00:39:34,600 Speaker 4: he wanted to, he would not. 745 00:39:35,040 --> 00:39:38,120 Speaker 3: Not that I've because I'm that would apply more. 746 00:39:38,160 --> 00:39:40,600 Speaker 4: I feel like if I was out and about in 747 00:39:40,640 --> 00:39:44,279 Speaker 4: the city and maybe I worked, and you know, there 748 00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:48,120 Speaker 4: was somebody that I was eyeing, and I wouldn't I 749 00:39:48,120 --> 00:39:51,400 Speaker 4: wouldn't ask him out. I would I would wait. So No, 750 00:39:51,560 --> 00:39:58,399 Speaker 4: I've never asked. I've never asked. I've never asked anybody out. 751 00:39:59,160 --> 00:40:03,080 Speaker 1: So do you need a new dating challenge? Sure? 752 00:40:03,400 --> 00:40:04,000 Speaker 3: What do you have? 753 00:40:07,400 --> 00:40:13,520 Speaker 1: You never know? You are on id perto we we uh, 754 00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:16,760 Speaker 1: you know we're open to all sorts of fun games. 755 00:40:17,560 --> 00:40:20,800 Speaker 2: So my really good friend Luanne, because I was on Housewives, 756 00:40:20,800 --> 00:40:21,440 Speaker 2: I don't know if you know that. 757 00:40:21,520 --> 00:40:23,800 Speaker 1: But I was on Housewives and my friend Luanne I 758 00:40:23,880 --> 00:40:26,440 Speaker 1: had her on and I asked her what I should do. 759 00:40:26,719 --> 00:40:30,239 Speaker 2: So she said, write a note on a piece on 760 00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:32,640 Speaker 2: a napkin and send it to a guy when you're 761 00:40:32,640 --> 00:40:35,000 Speaker 2: at a bar, because you never asked him went out, 762 00:40:35,680 --> 00:40:37,440 Speaker 2: So maybe you don't have to you don't have to 763 00:40:37,880 --> 00:40:41,880 Speaker 2: verbally ask, but maybe like give all your number to somebody. 764 00:40:42,480 --> 00:40:45,799 Speaker 3: No, that's not going to happen in this way. 765 00:40:46,239 --> 00:40:48,239 Speaker 1: Just in case you're wondering, that's what I said. 766 00:40:48,600 --> 00:40:48,920 Speaker 2: I was like. 767 00:40:49,360 --> 00:40:52,080 Speaker 1: I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, how 768 00:40:52,120 --> 00:40:56,560 Speaker 1: about like just something casual like drink, question work. No, 769 00:40:57,440 --> 00:40:58,960 Speaker 1: that's not that's that's a word. 770 00:40:59,160 --> 00:41:00,920 Speaker 3: That's even more anxiety written. 771 00:41:01,200 --> 00:41:03,839 Speaker 2: But you have to do something fun because actually, listen, 772 00:41:04,080 --> 00:41:06,279 Speaker 2: when I did it, I was with two of my 773 00:41:06,360 --> 00:41:08,399 Speaker 2: really good friends and I'm like, you know what, I'm 774 00:41:08,480 --> 00:41:09,160 Speaker 2: just going to try this. 775 00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:10,680 Speaker 1: There was a guy at the end of the bar. 776 00:41:10,880 --> 00:41:12,480 Speaker 1: I asked for a drink. He came over. 777 00:41:12,719 --> 00:41:15,520 Speaker 2: He happened to be a love hotel with Luan, which 778 00:41:15,640 --> 00:41:18,000 Speaker 2: was very awkward, but I thought it was very very 779 00:41:18,040 --> 00:41:19,719 Speaker 2: funny and I and I and I was like, I 780 00:41:19,840 --> 00:41:20,720 Speaker 2: was very proud of myself. 781 00:41:20,719 --> 00:41:23,360 Speaker 1: I was like, huh, look at me asking people out, and. 782 00:41:23,640 --> 00:41:26,640 Speaker 3: I think I'm feeling plush just thinking about it. First 783 00:41:26,680 --> 00:41:27,440 Speaker 3: of all, when. 784 00:41:27,320 --> 00:41:30,840 Speaker 4: Even it's you have to you have to know that 785 00:41:31,080 --> 00:41:36,680 Speaker 4: they're single, which would be I mean, yeah, I'm not 786 00:41:36,880 --> 00:41:37,720 Speaker 4: up for that challenge. 787 00:41:37,800 --> 00:41:40,080 Speaker 1: What about giving someone a compliment like I really like 788 00:41:40,160 --> 00:41:40,760 Speaker 1: your shoes. 789 00:41:41,440 --> 00:41:43,160 Speaker 3: Possibly, I'm just trying to think. 790 00:41:43,239 --> 00:41:47,719 Speaker 4: I don't think I'm in environments much because the places 791 00:41:47,800 --> 00:41:50,759 Speaker 4: that I frequent single. 792 00:41:50,520 --> 00:41:54,040 Speaker 3: People really aren't there. So here, so my only. 793 00:41:53,920 --> 00:41:57,880 Speaker 4: Access to meeting people really is the apps. I mean, 794 00:41:57,920 --> 00:42:02,000 Speaker 4: I've been on vacation and I always keep my eye open. 795 00:42:02,280 --> 00:42:06,520 Speaker 4: But unfortunately, Okay, I just thought of it, Kelly, Okay, great, 796 00:42:06,719 --> 00:42:10,040 Speaker 4: what is it? So we were we were in Pebble 797 00:42:10,120 --> 00:42:14,479 Speaker 4: Beach and there was dad having dinner with his son, 798 00:42:14,680 --> 00:42:17,880 Speaker 4: and the sun was darling, and the dad looked cute, 799 00:42:18,400 --> 00:42:21,200 Speaker 4: and I looked for a ring and there wasn't a ring. 800 00:42:21,680 --> 00:42:26,080 Speaker 4: And if there was ever a circumstance to do what 801 00:42:26,239 --> 00:42:29,920 Speaker 4: you're talking about, that would be the only circumstance. But 802 00:42:30,040 --> 00:42:32,640 Speaker 4: I would have I would not have had the courage 803 00:42:32,680 --> 00:42:35,800 Speaker 4: to do that because I also do not want to 804 00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:36,600 Speaker 4: be hitting. 805 00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:38,640 Speaker 3: On some they could have a girlfriend. 806 00:42:38,760 --> 00:42:45,480 Speaker 4: So no, not doing your challenges because I'm stepping on 807 00:42:45,640 --> 00:42:46,680 Speaker 4: somebody's toes. 808 00:42:46,960 --> 00:42:48,160 Speaker 1: I feel like I have to walk with you in 809 00:42:48,239 --> 00:42:49,840 Speaker 1: the supermarket. I feel like we had to be like, 810 00:42:50,040 --> 00:42:56,880 Speaker 1: so are you a white flower? Or this is my 811 00:42:57,040 --> 00:42:57,919 Speaker 1: weird friend Kelly. 812 00:42:58,320 --> 00:43:01,960 Speaker 4: I don't think I'm I'm I'm not going to ever. 813 00:43:02,800 --> 00:43:05,880 Speaker 4: I don't hit I just I like the compliments. 814 00:43:06,000 --> 00:43:08,080 Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm a big compliment person, but not not 815 00:43:08,400 --> 00:43:11,320 Speaker 2: in a disingenuous way. But I do look for things 816 00:43:11,400 --> 00:43:12,520 Speaker 2: to say nice things to people. 817 00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:12,759 Speaker 3: I do. 818 00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:13,520 Speaker 1: I always do that. 819 00:43:13,719 --> 00:43:17,000 Speaker 2: But so I compliment is kind of a nice icebreaker 820 00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:19,840 Speaker 2: because guys don't really get compliments. They give compliments, but 821 00:43:19,920 --> 00:43:22,319 Speaker 2: they don't really get them. So maybe like some kind 822 00:43:22,320 --> 00:43:25,600 Speaker 2: of compliment I agree with you, I really think. By 823 00:43:25,640 --> 00:43:27,759 Speaker 2: the way, one of my closest friends, he's like, he 824 00:43:27,840 --> 00:43:30,759 Speaker 2: lives in Miami, and he was like, everybody goes to 825 00:43:30,800 --> 00:43:34,160 Speaker 2: the supermarket on Sunday nights to meet people. I'm like 826 00:43:34,400 --> 00:43:36,080 Speaker 2: what He's like, Yeah, I'm. 827 00:43:36,000 --> 00:43:37,920 Speaker 1: Like which one He's like, obviously Whole Foods. 828 00:43:37,920 --> 00:43:41,800 Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, okay, So maybe change up the routine 829 00:43:41,960 --> 00:43:43,960 Speaker 2: of your shopping hours. Maybe like tell your son to 830 00:43:44,000 --> 00:43:45,960 Speaker 2: be like, I'll wear it bag. Mommy has to go 831 00:43:46,080 --> 00:43:50,879 Speaker 2: buy some chocolate chips at seven pm. He's like, Mom, 832 00:43:50,960 --> 00:43:52,560 Speaker 2: you've got a storage unit full of them. 833 00:43:52,960 --> 00:43:53,680 Speaker 1: Well, I need some more. 834 00:43:53,920 --> 00:43:57,000 Speaker 4: I do switch up my routine. And remember I do 835 00:43:57,280 --> 00:44:00,719 Speaker 4: live in the burbs. We're not talking there. There's a 836 00:44:00,880 --> 00:44:06,840 Speaker 4: ton of you know, single people. And I also, like 837 00:44:06,960 --> 00:44:10,760 Speaker 4: I say, very respectful. I kind of have the mindset 838 00:44:10,840 --> 00:44:13,279 Speaker 4: of everybody around me is married. That's why I would 839 00:44:13,360 --> 00:44:16,960 Speaker 4: never feel comfortable and hitting on somebody. 840 00:44:17,520 --> 00:44:20,640 Speaker 1: Okay, let's let's check the boxes. Let's check the boxes. 841 00:44:20,719 --> 00:44:23,439 Speaker 1: First of all, you're dating at profile fire. That's great. 842 00:44:24,480 --> 00:44:26,880 Speaker 1: You're so beautiful and so real. 843 00:44:26,880 --> 00:44:31,040 Speaker 2: And authentic, So that's good. You are looking for the 844 00:44:31,239 --> 00:44:34,200 Speaker 2: right things, you have the right intentions. 845 00:44:34,360 --> 00:44:36,760 Speaker 1: You're like ready, You're ready today. 846 00:44:38,520 --> 00:44:39,040 Speaker 3: Agree. 847 00:44:39,640 --> 00:44:42,560 Speaker 4: I do go with my gut, and my gut so far, 848 00:44:42,680 --> 00:44:46,800 Speaker 4: knock on Wood hasn't served me wrong because I've met lovely, 849 00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:47,920 Speaker 4: lovely people. 850 00:44:48,000 --> 00:44:50,840 Speaker 3: But I'm afraid the apps are dead now. I don't know, 851 00:44:51,000 --> 00:44:52,399 Speaker 3: so I might be going on a break. 852 00:44:52,440 --> 00:44:52,800 Speaker 4: I don't know. 853 00:44:53,280 --> 00:44:55,640 Speaker 1: I'll go ahead from Kelly, go to the supermarket. Thank 854 00:44:55,680 --> 00:44:58,880 Speaker 1: you so much really for helping me and for inspiring 855 00:44:59,040 --> 00:45:01,800 Speaker 1: our listeners I really really appreciate and they appreciate it, 856 00:45:01,800 --> 00:45:02,600 Speaker 1: and I appreciate it. 857 00:45:02,880 --> 00:45:04,200 Speaker 3: If I can do it, they can do it. 858 00:45:04,280 --> 00:45:08,680 Speaker 4: It's not easy, but honestly, it gives me an extra 859 00:45:09,000 --> 00:45:12,120 Speaker 4: kick in my step, even when I'm not crushing. 860 00:45:12,440 --> 00:45:16,200 Speaker 3: It's fun to get that text. It's fun the unknown. 861 00:45:16,560 --> 00:45:20,160 Speaker 3: Could this be something? Okay, No, it wasn't. Well, you know, 862 00:45:20,440 --> 00:45:22,080 Speaker 3: I have the other things I enjoy in life. 863 00:45:22,560 --> 00:45:24,839 Speaker 2: So, Kate, I want you to keep up with us 864 00:45:25,160 --> 00:45:27,640 Speaker 2: on the podcast about any new developments that have been 865 00:45:27,680 --> 00:45:30,240 Speaker 2: happening in your dating life. The podcast is all about 866 00:45:30,320 --> 00:45:33,200 Speaker 2: people like you and me not giving up on love. 867 00:45:33,280 --> 00:45:35,520 Speaker 2: So thanks so much for sharing your story with us. 868 00:45:36,280 --> 00:45:38,000 Speaker 2: Are you like Kate, I need help when it comes 869 00:45:38,040 --> 00:45:40,800 Speaker 2: to dating? Call us or email us. All the info 870 00:45:41,080 --> 00:45:43,480 Speaker 2: is in the show notes, follow us on socials, and 871 00:45:43,520 --> 00:45:46,279 Speaker 2: make sure to rate and review the podcast. I do 872 00:45:46,640 --> 00:45:50,680 Speaker 2: Part two an iHeartRadio podcast. We're falling in Love is 873 00:45:50,760 --> 00:45:51,480 Speaker 2: the main objective.