1 00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:03,840 Speaker 1: Wilmer has that I've been up for a couple of days. 2 00:00:03,880 --> 00:00:05,800 Speaker 2: Look, yeah, set about. 3 00:00:05,800 --> 00:00:06,600 Speaker 1: Why do you look like that? 4 00:00:07,080 --> 00:00:07,280 Speaker 2: You know? 5 00:00:09,160 --> 00:00:12,720 Speaker 3: I decided, uh yeah, that in order for me to 6 00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:15,280 Speaker 3: lose as much sleep as I possibly can. 7 00:00:15,440 --> 00:00:18,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, as you have a second child. Ah yeah, that'll 8 00:00:18,239 --> 00:00:18,520 Speaker 1: do it. 9 00:00:18,480 --> 00:00:20,640 Speaker 2: I thought, I tell her, we'll do it. I said, 10 00:00:20,720 --> 00:00:21,479 Speaker 2: let me try it. 11 00:00:21,640 --> 00:00:23,520 Speaker 3: A lot of my friends have tried this, like, I 12 00:00:23,520 --> 00:00:25,080 Speaker 3: don't want to sleep anymore. 13 00:00:24,680 --> 00:00:26,200 Speaker 1: Because you don't have enough going on. 14 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:28,840 Speaker 3: No, And I just talked to myself like, besides all 15 00:00:28,840 --> 00:00:32,120 Speaker 3: the things that are happening and going on, like, how 16 00:00:32,120 --> 00:00:33,960 Speaker 3: can I put the icing on my sanity? 17 00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:42,040 Speaker 2: Right? Welcome everyone, This is Warmer Valderama. 18 00:00:42,200 --> 00:00:43,160 Speaker 1: This is Freddie Rodrick. 19 00:00:43,560 --> 00:00:45,320 Speaker 2: This is Do Amigos podcast. 20 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:48,040 Speaker 3: Thank you all for listening, and thank you all for 21 00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:50,760 Speaker 3: tuning in and downloading and watching it on YouTube and 22 00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:54,200 Speaker 3: all that. Thank you also to all of our guests. 23 00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:56,840 Speaker 3: We've had some really great guests and we have a 24 00:00:56,840 --> 00:00:59,720 Speaker 3: couple of episodes. I hope people enjoyed the wisdom some 25 00:00:59,800 --> 00:01:03,440 Speaker 3: of them have brought to this space of serenity. And 26 00:01:04,959 --> 00:01:07,640 Speaker 3: we are smoking a cigar and I know what's up. 27 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:10,640 Speaker 1: You have to be can well see that back there. 28 00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:12,520 Speaker 1: Wimer has this great humid door. 29 00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:17,000 Speaker 2: We gotta just finish, you know, we'll have the cigar episode. 30 00:01:17,360 --> 00:01:19,200 Speaker 1: I remember a couple of months ago you brought out 31 00:01:19,240 --> 00:01:22,240 Speaker 1: a cigar and you were like you were talking the 32 00:01:22,319 --> 00:01:26,720 Speaker 1: cigar up and you were you were telling me how fancy. 33 00:01:26,319 --> 00:01:26,920 Speaker 2: It was made. 34 00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:28,760 Speaker 1: But then you put it back in the in the humidor. 35 00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:31,640 Speaker 3: I want to because I just felt like, Okay, you know, 36 00:01:31,680 --> 00:01:32,960 Speaker 3: I just came back from occasion. 37 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:35,959 Speaker 2: I had a couple of cigars. I didn't have to 38 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:36,480 Speaker 2: have that there. 39 00:01:36,520 --> 00:01:37,960 Speaker 3: But we have to figure out because we got to 40 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:43,640 Speaker 3: have the cigar my wife had, My lady had our 41 00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:44,880 Speaker 3: second time, Yes. 42 00:01:45,160 --> 00:01:45,440 Speaker 2: You know. 43 00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:50,600 Speaker 1: Me, congratulations, Thank you very much. 44 00:01:50,760 --> 00:01:54,480 Speaker 3: She is an absolute hero. She did incredible and I 45 00:01:54,560 --> 00:01:58,600 Speaker 3: mean odd of what women do. Were you there, Yes, 46 00:01:58,720 --> 00:02:03,520 Speaker 3: this is my second time. I'm witnessing my lady bring 47 00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:04,560 Speaker 3: miracles to that. 48 00:02:04,640 --> 00:02:05,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's pretty amazing. 49 00:02:06,240 --> 00:02:09,160 Speaker 2: Just yes, I mean were you there when? 50 00:02:09,320 --> 00:02:12,480 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's unbelievable. You know, like it's impossible to not 51 00:02:13,360 --> 00:02:14,560 Speaker 3: be like, can I rub. 52 00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:18,720 Speaker 2: Your feet today? You know, because you don't have to 53 00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:20,440 Speaker 2: push a baby out. It's like we need to do 54 00:02:20,520 --> 00:02:23,960 Speaker 2: more for them, right, But it was really beautiful shout 55 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:24,680 Speaker 2: out to everybody. 56 00:02:24,680 --> 00:02:27,680 Speaker 3: A theater Sinaide, joining a great house friend over there 57 00:02:27,880 --> 00:02:31,280 Speaker 3: who really helped us with everything. But you know, Cedars 58 00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:34,160 Speaker 3: are really taking care of us two children now there, 59 00:02:34,360 --> 00:02:35,639 Speaker 3: They're just unbelievable. 60 00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:36,720 Speaker 1: She was born there too. 61 00:02:37,040 --> 00:02:41,000 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, yeah, and he was born on seven eleven, 62 00:02:41,400 --> 00:02:44,359 Speaker 3: which a lot of people call me immediately like wow, 63 00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:46,880 Speaker 3: how cool, free slur piece. 64 00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:49,560 Speaker 1: As if you planned it that way. 65 00:02:50,040 --> 00:02:53,160 Speaker 2: Yeah, and we know that he was supposed to be 66 00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:54,200 Speaker 2: born on the twenty fifth. 67 00:02:54,360 --> 00:02:56,560 Speaker 3: It was a do date, and he came on the eleventh, 68 00:02:56,600 --> 00:02:58,399 Speaker 3: which was great because I was going back to work 69 00:02:58,400 --> 00:03:00,840 Speaker 3: on the sixteen, so he gave me a couple of 70 00:03:00,919 --> 00:03:02,720 Speaker 3: days just to be home before I had to get 71 00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:04,560 Speaker 3: clocked back into t n c I S. 72 00:03:04,600 --> 00:03:06,919 Speaker 1: But where the name? Where'd the name come from? 73 00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:07,120 Speaker 2: So? 74 00:03:08,280 --> 00:03:11,119 Speaker 3: Well, so, for like so many years, the wolf has 75 00:03:11,160 --> 00:03:14,600 Speaker 3: been my spirit animal. I just love the wolf mentality, 76 00:03:14,720 --> 00:03:18,440 Speaker 3: the pac mentality, examily mentality. I love the way they 77 00:03:18,560 --> 00:03:21,720 Speaker 3: organize for survival and all that stuff, and and and 78 00:03:21,760 --> 00:03:24,720 Speaker 3: how they ride for each other, you know, and and 79 00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:26,800 Speaker 3: so I always kept with that my friends, and you know, 80 00:03:26,919 --> 00:03:28,960 Speaker 3: like we're all kind of been subliminately the wolf pack, 81 00:03:29,040 --> 00:03:32,119 Speaker 3: you know. So Amanda surprised me with that. She's like, hey, 82 00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:35,240 Speaker 3: I really like Wolf, and I was like, yeah, I 83 00:03:35,240 --> 00:03:37,120 Speaker 3: didn't want to say like, I love it too, so 84 00:03:37,160 --> 00:03:42,280 Speaker 3: it'd be like it's your idea, Yes, it's your idea. 85 00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:44,120 Speaker 2: And I was like, yeah, that sounds so great. 86 00:03:44,160 --> 00:03:47,040 Speaker 3: Well you named this one, you know, because I obviously 87 00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:49,320 Speaker 3: got away with mine with Nicando, you know. 88 00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:54,240 Speaker 2: But but we both agreed Wolf was a cool spirit, 89 00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:54,640 Speaker 2: you know. 90 00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:57,360 Speaker 3: And then his name, his middle name is Monte, and 91 00:03:57,520 --> 00:04:01,760 Speaker 3: Monte and kind of an Italian means mountains. So we thought, 92 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:04,520 Speaker 3: you know, she's the ocean. Her middle name is Oshiana, 93 00:04:05,560 --> 00:04:07,960 Speaker 3: so we thought she's the tranquility in the balance of 94 00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:10,200 Speaker 3: the ocean, and he's the you. 95 00:04:10,160 --> 00:04:15,800 Speaker 2: Know, the she's the ocean too, you know, to his mountain. 96 00:04:16,279 --> 00:04:17,080 Speaker 1: That's pretty cool. 97 00:04:17,520 --> 00:04:19,359 Speaker 3: Yeah, so it's been it's been kind of cool to 98 00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:23,080 Speaker 3: see if we're no longer here with them, Yeah, that 99 00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:26,080 Speaker 3: they know they can have each other and coexistence. So 100 00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:28,240 Speaker 3: they became a little bit more profound than than just 101 00:04:28,279 --> 00:04:30,600 Speaker 3: to name. But so he's the Wolf and she's the 102 00:04:31,120 --> 00:04:32,920 Speaker 3: honorable Geisha, the female warrior. 103 00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:37,320 Speaker 1: How do you feel about getting ready to wipe butt again? 104 00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:38,960 Speaker 1: That's three in the morning. 105 00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:43,359 Speaker 2: I'm glad you asked and I'm glad you asked it. 106 00:04:43,400 --> 00:04:45,440 Speaker 3: And this is gonna also turn into an advice to 107 00:04:45,520 --> 00:04:48,720 Speaker 3: every dad out there, whether it's your first, or your 108 00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:49,840 Speaker 3: second or your third. 109 00:04:50,760 --> 00:04:52,480 Speaker 2: I cannot stress this enough. 110 00:04:53,760 --> 00:04:57,040 Speaker 3: Change the first diaper, and change as many diapers as 111 00:04:57,040 --> 00:04:59,960 Speaker 3: you possibly can could it is it is a privilege, 112 00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:04,440 Speaker 3: an honor to change your sons or. 113 00:05:04,480 --> 00:05:07,200 Speaker 1: Daughter's kulito to wipe that. 114 00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:12,320 Speaker 3: But yeah, like that, that is the most a beautiful 115 00:05:12,880 --> 00:05:16,440 Speaker 3: offering of care and nurturing you and your kid. And 116 00:05:16,760 --> 00:05:20,560 Speaker 3: I'm gonna tell all dads also that change as many 117 00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:24,840 Speaker 3: diapers as you can until they turned one, so then 118 00:05:25,080 --> 00:05:27,520 Speaker 3: your wife will never be able to say that they 119 00:05:27,600 --> 00:05:28,560 Speaker 3: never change diapers. 120 00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:30,160 Speaker 1: Are you guys on shifts? 121 00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:30,560 Speaker 2: Are you? 122 00:05:30,680 --> 00:05:32,880 Speaker 1: Are you the are you the three o'clock in the 123 00:05:32,880 --> 00:05:35,600 Speaker 1: morning guy? To wipe the diaper, to wipe the butter? 124 00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:38,560 Speaker 3: Well, we have to change his diaper every time he feeds, 125 00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:41,200 Speaker 3: because every time he feeds, it gets very festive. 126 00:05:41,680 --> 00:05:44,000 Speaker 1: It gets festive. Yeah, yes, yeah. 127 00:05:43,839 --> 00:05:48,120 Speaker 3: It's like confetti, Like there's just a confetti little popper 128 00:05:48,600 --> 00:05:52,360 Speaker 3: that happens as soon as he tastes that delicious dairy, right. 129 00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:55,240 Speaker 1: And he's not on sid wait wait, wait till he 130 00:05:55,279 --> 00:05:56,640 Speaker 1: gets on You remember that, right. 131 00:05:56,600 --> 00:06:00,960 Speaker 3: Yea, yeah, and that's what I said, potato, So they 132 00:06:01,120 --> 00:06:03,640 Speaker 3: have solids, right to be like, hey, change to eat 133 00:06:03,640 --> 00:06:06,440 Speaker 3: that print, take it a break. 134 00:06:06,880 --> 00:06:08,840 Speaker 1: And then when it's three in the morning and he 135 00:06:08,880 --> 00:06:11,200 Speaker 1: starts to have solids and she's elbowing you together. 136 00:06:11,279 --> 00:06:13,919 Speaker 2: Yeah, and I gotta take one for the team, you know. 137 00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:16,120 Speaker 2: But you know, I actually don't don't really mind it 138 00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:16,520 Speaker 2: very much. 139 00:06:17,800 --> 00:06:20,200 Speaker 3: It's it's it's part of it, right, It's like part 140 00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:21,920 Speaker 3: of the whole thing. And you just think about this. 141 00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:26,640 Speaker 3: One day you're not going to change a diaper and 142 00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:30,159 Speaker 3: you'll realize, wow, I kind of that was a moment, right, 143 00:06:30,240 --> 00:06:33,440 Speaker 3: and it went and it no longer here. But Nakano 144 00:06:33,640 --> 00:06:36,160 Speaker 3: like she's you know, she goes and takes care of 145 00:06:36,160 --> 00:06:39,120 Speaker 3: her own business and and like, yeah, and that feels 146 00:06:39,120 --> 00:06:41,240 Speaker 3: funny because she's like, I did all by myself, daddy, 147 00:06:41,279 --> 00:06:43,280 Speaker 3: and I'm like, but I want to help now. 148 00:06:43,880 --> 00:06:44,760 Speaker 2: It's very funny. 149 00:06:44,960 --> 00:06:48,560 Speaker 1: But but yeah, anyways, is there anything that you learned 150 00:06:48,600 --> 00:06:52,600 Speaker 1: from your experience with Ncano that that you're like, I 151 00:06:52,640 --> 00:06:55,560 Speaker 1: wish I would have known that with Nacano, But now 152 00:06:55,600 --> 00:06:57,800 Speaker 1: that I do know that I'm going to apply it 153 00:06:58,200 --> 00:06:58,679 Speaker 1: with Wolf. 154 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:04,279 Speaker 3: I think, like we practice a certain level of frequency 155 00:07:04,320 --> 00:07:09,320 Speaker 3: at the house, you know, like there's no like high tensions. 156 00:07:09,440 --> 00:07:12,200 Speaker 3: You know, we don't you know, we don't have discussions 157 00:07:12,320 --> 00:07:14,200 Speaker 3: or arguments in front of the kids. 158 00:07:14,240 --> 00:07:15,800 Speaker 2: You know, like there's a level. 159 00:07:15,840 --> 00:07:18,240 Speaker 3: We also have to show a certain level of balance 160 00:07:18,280 --> 00:07:20,480 Speaker 3: when we deal with adversity in front of our kids, 161 00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:23,880 Speaker 3: you know, so they understand that's also a choice for them. 162 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:25,840 Speaker 3: I think that's the biggest one for me. It's just 163 00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:29,560 Speaker 3: to say, hey, you know, take a deep breath first. Yeah, 164 00:07:29,720 --> 00:07:32,240 Speaker 3: you know, And that's what we've tried to teaching account 165 00:07:32,280 --> 00:07:35,520 Speaker 3: As soon as she's feeling her emotions are hard to control. 166 00:07:35,200 --> 00:07:39,520 Speaker 2: Hold on, let's low down, take a deep breath all 167 00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:40,000 Speaker 2: the time. 168 00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:43,120 Speaker 3: And now when you have your attention, okay, tell me 169 00:07:43,120 --> 00:07:45,440 Speaker 3: what's going on, this and this and this, Okay, cool, 170 00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:48,240 Speaker 3: then let's go. You know, let's change your socks and 171 00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:50,760 Speaker 3: it doesn't hurt anymore when you wear your little jellies, 172 00:07:50,760 --> 00:07:52,960 Speaker 3: you know. Like so it's like stuff like that, that, 173 00:07:53,120 --> 00:07:56,360 Speaker 3: like there's simple equations that if you I don't know, 174 00:07:56,360 --> 00:07:58,960 Speaker 3: if you offer that, they have the choice to slow 175 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:00,880 Speaker 3: things down a little bit. So they can see the 176 00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:04,800 Speaker 3: clear path, maybe it turns into some type of like 177 00:08:04,880 --> 00:08:06,280 Speaker 3: how do I see down the road? So I think 178 00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:07,840 Speaker 3: that's the one thing I think I really want to 179 00:08:07,880 --> 00:08:08,360 Speaker 3: pass down to. 180 00:08:08,600 --> 00:08:11,920 Speaker 1: Why did you make that conscious choice with her? You know? 181 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:15,120 Speaker 3: I think I saw when I was really young, I 182 00:08:15,160 --> 00:08:18,880 Speaker 3: saw something with my family, my mom and my dad 183 00:08:20,040 --> 00:08:23,880 Speaker 3: that should have been a more frantic reaction. There was 184 00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:28,240 Speaker 3: something that happened, you know, and it was like really 185 00:08:28,280 --> 00:08:29,080 Speaker 3: really impactful. 186 00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:31,600 Speaker 1: Right. It's like we were at some you know, we 187 00:08:31,600 --> 00:08:33,840 Speaker 1: were at you know, at a soccer. 188 00:08:33,559 --> 00:08:36,640 Speaker 3: Field, you know, and you know, some guys came up 189 00:08:36,679 --> 00:08:40,560 Speaker 3: and confronted a guy and it like escalated very quickly, 190 00:08:41,679 --> 00:08:45,000 Speaker 3: and my dad, without missing it, beat, he's like, your soccer, 191 00:08:45,320 --> 00:08:47,440 Speaker 3: grab your things, whatever we're getting in the car, gets 192 00:08:47,480 --> 00:08:51,360 Speaker 3: in the car, and then we left. But other people 193 00:08:51,360 --> 00:08:54,400 Speaker 3: were like running and this and whatever, you know. And 194 00:08:54,840 --> 00:08:56,640 Speaker 3: it was the way that my dad and my mom 195 00:08:56,679 --> 00:08:59,839 Speaker 3: reacted to this high moment of intensity that told me, oh, 196 00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:01,800 Speaker 3: had a choice to kind of slow things down a 197 00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:06,240 Speaker 3: little bit. Take it the breath one two through what 198 00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:06,960 Speaker 3: are the steps? 199 00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:07,679 Speaker 2: Pace one? 200 00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:10,200 Speaker 3: Face two, phase three And and I've carried us since 201 00:09:10,200 --> 00:09:12,360 Speaker 3: I was a little since a little boy, you know, 202 00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:16,719 Speaker 3: I haven't reacted with emotions first, you know, I kind 203 00:09:16,720 --> 00:09:18,960 Speaker 3: of just like listen first, and I think that's what. 204 00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:21,560 Speaker 3: Then he listened to his environment, he did what he 205 00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:23,560 Speaker 3: had to do to get us out of there, and 206 00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:25,880 Speaker 3: then it made me feel like, oh, that's how you 207 00:09:25,960 --> 00:09:26,520 Speaker 3: react to. 208 00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:28,319 Speaker 2: High tense situations. 209 00:09:29,880 --> 00:09:31,800 Speaker 3: Then, you know, then I had to teach myself, which 210 00:09:31,840 --> 00:09:34,360 Speaker 3: they didn't teach me this part because they themselves, as 211 00:09:34,400 --> 00:09:37,280 Speaker 3: you know, our parents swallow the trauma, right, they don't 212 00:09:37,280 --> 00:09:38,640 Speaker 3: deal with it, they don't talk about it whatever. 213 00:09:38,640 --> 00:09:41,120 Speaker 2: Then I had to teach myself later to like how 214 00:09:41,160 --> 00:09:43,160 Speaker 2: do I let it go? You know? How do I 215 00:09:43,280 --> 00:09:43,839 Speaker 2: process it? 216 00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:44,200 Speaker 1: Yea? 217 00:09:44,600 --> 00:09:46,520 Speaker 3: How do you how do you grab that energy that 218 00:09:46,600 --> 00:09:49,480 Speaker 3: you not suppressed but you process differently? 219 00:09:49,600 --> 00:09:51,840 Speaker 1: And like what did it turn into for you later? 220 00:09:52,559 --> 00:09:56,040 Speaker 3: And you know, and it's not a very weird mathematical 221 00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:58,880 Speaker 3: scientific equestion and it's just more of like, am I 222 00:09:58,920 --> 00:09:59,959 Speaker 3: okay with what happened? 223 00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:00,480 Speaker 1: M hm? 224 00:10:01,120 --> 00:10:03,760 Speaker 2: Check with yourself? You feel good? Okay? Cool? 225 00:10:03,840 --> 00:10:06,320 Speaker 3: Onto original programming, you know, but I think that's kind 226 00:10:06,360 --> 00:10:07,080 Speaker 3: of where it came from. 227 00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:10,120 Speaker 1: And there's also you know, that saying I don't remember 228 00:10:10,160 --> 00:10:12,920 Speaker 1: what the person said, I ali remember how they made 229 00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:16,400 Speaker 1: me feel. You've heard that saying. I always feel like 230 00:10:16,440 --> 00:10:20,319 Speaker 1: with kids, you know, at that age, they only they 231 00:10:20,360 --> 00:10:23,480 Speaker 1: only absorb how you make them feel, right, And so 232 00:10:23,720 --> 00:10:26,120 Speaker 1: like to your point, like, if there is tension in 233 00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:28,720 Speaker 1: the house, if there is arguing, is there you know, 234 00:10:28,760 --> 00:10:32,080 Speaker 1: they don't know what the argument is about, right, They're 235 00:10:32,120 --> 00:10:34,720 Speaker 1: only aware of how you're making them feel in that moment. 236 00:10:35,280 --> 00:10:37,800 Speaker 1: And so by you approaching it and being calm and 237 00:10:38,360 --> 00:10:41,679 Speaker 1: you know everything you just said, it's controlling how you're 238 00:10:41,720 --> 00:10:43,360 Speaker 1: making her feel at the stage because. 239 00:10:43,200 --> 00:10:44,920 Speaker 3: There are a moment for you that when you were 240 00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:47,760 Speaker 3: growing up that also made you oh, this is how 241 00:10:47,800 --> 00:10:49,800 Speaker 3: I handle this is how I deal with this, or 242 00:10:49,920 --> 00:10:52,640 Speaker 3: like this is something you have to relearn to do 243 00:10:52,760 --> 00:10:54,400 Speaker 3: later when you realize maybe it wasn't. 244 00:10:55,040 --> 00:10:59,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I made a conscious decision. You know, I 245 00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:02,240 Speaker 1: grew up around gangs and drugs and all that stuff 246 00:11:02,280 --> 00:11:03,840 Speaker 1: my whole life, and I sort of I made a 247 00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:06,480 Speaker 1: real conscious decision that when the kids were coming up, 248 00:11:06,520 --> 00:11:08,440 Speaker 1: I wasn't gonna put them in that environment, you know. 249 00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:13,000 Speaker 1: I you know, as much as people made fun of 250 00:11:13,040 --> 00:11:14,600 Speaker 1: me at the time, they're like, oh, you're moving to 251 00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:17,440 Speaker 1: the suburbs. I'm like, I don't care. I don't want 252 00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:21,480 Speaker 1: to surround them around that. And sometimes what happens when 253 00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:23,719 Speaker 1: you grow up in that environment, and especially when you 254 00:11:23,760 --> 00:11:25,960 Speaker 1: have kids when you're younger, people are like, oh, you know, 255 00:11:26,080 --> 00:11:28,920 Speaker 1: you're you're not raising your kids with any street smarts. 256 00:11:29,559 --> 00:11:33,360 Speaker 1: But I didn't care about that. I just cared about 257 00:11:33,480 --> 00:11:38,840 Speaker 1: not surrounding them with the trauma that I underwent that 258 00:11:38,960 --> 00:11:43,440 Speaker 1: I saw, and how gangs and drugs and all that 259 00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:45,680 Speaker 1: stuff that I was surrounded with, how it made me feel. 260 00:11:45,760 --> 00:11:50,200 Speaker 1: Right as we talk about feel, you know, and you 261 00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:53,160 Speaker 1: talk about suppressing trauma, it was a lot of trauma 262 00:11:53,200 --> 00:11:56,800 Speaker 1: that myself and my brothers underwent growing up in that 263 00:11:56,880 --> 00:11:59,640 Speaker 1: type of environment that we found that we had to 264 00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:02,040 Speaker 1: kind of suppress and deal with it when we got older, 265 00:12:02,320 --> 00:12:04,280 Speaker 1: you know, because when you grow up in that kind 266 00:12:04,280 --> 00:12:07,280 Speaker 1: of environment, you're just trying to survive, so you're suppressing that, 267 00:12:07,559 --> 00:12:10,959 Speaker 1: you know. So anyway, I just think that that that 268 00:12:11,240 --> 00:12:14,160 Speaker 1: applies to everything, you know, whether it's whether it's Nakano 269 00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:16,280 Speaker 1: at home and you're choosing not to argue in front 270 00:12:16,280 --> 00:12:18,240 Speaker 1: of her and stuff. You know, like at the end 271 00:12:18,240 --> 00:12:20,720 Speaker 1: of the day, when you're young, you're only absorbing how 272 00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:23,600 Speaker 1: people and environments are making you feel you know. 273 00:12:23,800 --> 00:12:25,600 Speaker 2: Also, the biggest one I think to me is how 274 00:12:25,640 --> 00:12:27,959 Speaker 2: you treat others. Right, it's you know. 275 00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:30,920 Speaker 3: You you you could be flowing how you used to 276 00:12:31,040 --> 00:12:34,240 Speaker 3: flow with everyone in the but somebody else is now watching, 277 00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:38,600 Speaker 3: and you don't teach them how to handle their feelings 278 00:12:38,760 --> 00:12:41,920 Speaker 3: or you don't teach them how to communicate with the world. 279 00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:45,240 Speaker 3: They watch you do it and then they repeat it 280 00:12:45,400 --> 00:12:48,200 Speaker 3: a right and so, and you said that to me, 281 00:12:48,600 --> 00:12:51,199 Speaker 3: you know, you said, they're always watching. That's always watching, man, 282 00:12:51,200 --> 00:12:53,840 Speaker 3: They're always watching. They're always paying attention to everything you're doing. 283 00:12:54,679 --> 00:12:56,760 Speaker 3: And I've noticed that with the kind of since you 284 00:12:56,840 --> 00:13:00,480 Speaker 3: and I talked about that, she noticed her. And see 285 00:13:00,520 --> 00:13:03,640 Speaker 3: the way she walks into a room. She comes to 286 00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:06,000 Speaker 3: visit me on set, and she's saying hi to everyone, 287 00:13:06,080 --> 00:13:09,000 Speaker 3: shaking anyone's hands. She gives hugs when they when they're due, 288 00:13:09,080 --> 00:13:11,960 Speaker 3: and you know, and like she shows up and she's 289 00:13:12,040 --> 00:13:15,440 Speaker 3: not She doesn't fear strangers, right, but she you know, 290 00:13:15,520 --> 00:13:18,600 Speaker 3: she knows that when Daddy and Mommy moved, she has 291 00:13:18,640 --> 00:13:21,640 Speaker 3: to go too. She doesn't stay with anyone, but she 292 00:13:21,880 --> 00:13:24,800 Speaker 3: also understands the importance of like, hi, how are you, 293 00:13:24,880 --> 00:13:28,520 Speaker 3: I'm the condo, and it's like, and you. 294 00:13:28,440 --> 00:13:31,120 Speaker 1: Think that that's from watching you do that, because I 295 00:13:31,200 --> 00:13:32,000 Speaker 1: come in, I'm. 296 00:13:31,840 --> 00:13:37,880 Speaker 3: Like hello, And like the thing about that is that 297 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:40,360 Speaker 3: is that, you know, you set a tone for how 298 00:13:40,400 --> 00:13:43,000 Speaker 3: you want that moment to be for you. Yeah, and 299 00:13:43,040 --> 00:13:45,160 Speaker 3: she has control over that. And I noticed that, you know, 300 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:48,400 Speaker 3: and I love you know, we both like, we both 301 00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:49,040 Speaker 3: love people. 302 00:13:49,080 --> 00:13:50,240 Speaker 2: We walk into a room, we. 303 00:13:50,400 --> 00:13:52,600 Speaker 3: Like, well, we're going to have a conversation with anyone 304 00:13:52,679 --> 00:13:54,520 Speaker 3: who wants to have a conversation, right, yeah. 305 00:13:54,679 --> 00:13:56,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, And she's kind of developing that. 306 00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:58,720 Speaker 3: She comes to work, she goes to a restaurant, the 307 00:13:58,760 --> 00:14:00,280 Speaker 3: way she talks to waiters and whatever. 308 00:14:00,320 --> 00:14:01,199 Speaker 2: She's like very open. 309 00:14:01,280 --> 00:14:04,559 Speaker 3: She's like enjoying this and bringing people into her own experience, 310 00:14:04,559 --> 00:14:06,480 Speaker 3: which I think is really healthy. 311 00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:07,440 Speaker 2: Yeah. 312 00:14:07,520 --> 00:14:10,560 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's really interesting. You know, even even to this day, 313 00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:13,160 Speaker 1: you know, my kids are older and they still like, 314 00:14:13,240 --> 00:14:15,600 Speaker 1: every once in a while we'll say something and I'm like, 315 00:14:16,360 --> 00:14:17,840 Speaker 1: how do you know that. They're like, oh, because I 316 00:14:17,880 --> 00:14:19,920 Speaker 1: was watching you, Dad. I saw you did this, or 317 00:14:19,920 --> 00:14:21,960 Speaker 1: I saw you say this, or I saw them. I'm like, 318 00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:22,400 Speaker 1: damn it. 319 00:14:22,400 --> 00:14:23,920 Speaker 2: Even when you get older, you were watching. 320 00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:36,800 Speaker 1: They were always always watching always watching. Yeah, you were 321 00:14:36,840 --> 00:14:39,440 Speaker 1: talking about wiping butt and diapers and all that. And 322 00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:42,320 Speaker 1: I text this to you when the day you had 323 00:14:42,320 --> 00:14:44,720 Speaker 1: your child, and you and I were texting back and forth, 324 00:14:45,280 --> 00:14:49,640 Speaker 1: and I said to you, wait until your kids turn 325 00:14:50,080 --> 00:14:52,880 Speaker 1: twenty one, for example, and you get to have a 326 00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:55,320 Speaker 1: beer with them. Oh, and you get to look them 327 00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:57,560 Speaker 1: in the eye and you get to say, I used 328 00:14:57,600 --> 00:14:58,520 Speaker 1: to wipe your butt. 329 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:01,240 Speaker 2: I used to wipe your butt. 330 00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:03,680 Speaker 1: I say that to my kids all the time. I 331 00:15:03,760 --> 00:15:06,600 Speaker 1: used to wipe your but all right, dad, Yeah, it's crazy, 332 00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:08,680 Speaker 1: but it's wild when you look at your kids at 333 00:15:08,680 --> 00:15:11,080 Speaker 1: that age and they're older and you're like, wow, like 334 00:15:11,120 --> 00:15:13,160 Speaker 1: you're a grown man. But I used to wipe here. 335 00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:14,920 Speaker 3: I can't even I mean, my my daughter is four 336 00:15:14,960 --> 00:15:17,800 Speaker 3: years old, and I you know, I look forward to, 337 00:15:18,080 --> 00:15:21,320 Speaker 3: uh you know, to yeah, to like having a you know, 338 00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:23,200 Speaker 3: have a little glass of champagne with my daughter a 339 00:15:23,280 --> 00:15:26,280 Speaker 3: New Year's Eve, yeah know, or like going on vacation, 340 00:15:26,440 --> 00:15:29,040 Speaker 3: having pinacolidas together, like you know, like that kind of 341 00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:31,240 Speaker 3: silly stuff, like you're celebrating life with your kids. 342 00:15:31,320 --> 00:15:33,200 Speaker 2: It's a it's a different feeling, you know. 343 00:15:33,320 --> 00:15:35,600 Speaker 1: And how do you think she's going to handle it 344 00:15:36,440 --> 00:15:38,680 Speaker 1: was she receptive to love them. 345 00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:41,200 Speaker 3: Yeah, oh, my baby, my baby is I want to 346 00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:42,480 Speaker 3: meet I want you to meet my baby. 347 00:15:42,480 --> 00:15:43,720 Speaker 2: I want you to meet my baby. 348 00:15:43,720 --> 00:15:44,960 Speaker 1: She calls him my baby. 349 00:15:45,120 --> 00:15:47,000 Speaker 3: Not Somebody gave me a word of advice that I 350 00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:50,400 Speaker 3: thought was super important and said, someone said, make sure 351 00:15:50,440 --> 00:15:53,800 Speaker 3: that she knows that this is also happening to her. 352 00:15:55,440 --> 00:15:56,160 Speaker 1: Huh. 353 00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:57,880 Speaker 3: So when you have an only child and then you 354 00:15:57,920 --> 00:16:00,400 Speaker 3: have a second child come in, Yeah, you know, they 355 00:16:00,440 --> 00:16:04,680 Speaker 3: could be that first impression. How you prep your first 356 00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:08,720 Speaker 3: child for the arrival of the second is absolutely everything. 357 00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:10,920 Speaker 3: And I realized that the more and more I thought 358 00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:13,840 Speaker 3: about it while he was in the belly, the more 359 00:16:13,840 --> 00:16:17,520 Speaker 3: it was reinforsing to Nakano that this is happening for 360 00:16:17,600 --> 00:16:19,920 Speaker 3: all of us, for the family, This is for you. 361 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:22,320 Speaker 3: This is going to be your baby too, you know. 362 00:16:22,520 --> 00:16:24,920 Speaker 3: So she took a level of ownership. So she was 363 00:16:24,960 --> 00:16:27,240 Speaker 3: asking when is the baby coming? When is the baby coming? 364 00:16:27,680 --> 00:16:30,800 Speaker 3: So when the baby came, she already wanted to hold them. 365 00:16:30,840 --> 00:16:33,600 Speaker 3: She wanted to put a different outfit on. She's like, 366 00:16:33,640 --> 00:16:36,840 Speaker 3: I want to hold them, you know, And it's so it's. 367 00:16:36,720 --> 00:16:39,600 Speaker 2: A really cool thing. And it really did. 368 00:16:39,560 --> 00:16:41,360 Speaker 3: Make a difference in her because right now she has 369 00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:43,840 Speaker 3: a level of ownership. When she comes home from her 370 00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:48,600 Speaker 3: little school or camp, her daily camp over here, she 371 00:16:48,760 --> 00:16:51,000 Speaker 3: runs saying, she's like, I gotta go, I gotta go 372 00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:54,280 Speaker 3: kiss my baby. And then she like rolls into his room, 373 00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:57,160 Speaker 3: cases him, says Hi, tells him one or two things 374 00:16:57,160 --> 00:17:00,560 Speaker 3: about school, and then gets out about her day or 375 00:17:00,640 --> 00:17:02,560 Speaker 3: like she's going to go to bed, she's like she 376 00:17:02,600 --> 00:17:04,600 Speaker 3: has to kiss him good night because that's her baby, 377 00:17:05,160 --> 00:17:05,359 Speaker 3: you know. 378 00:17:05,440 --> 00:17:06,800 Speaker 2: So that's been really cool. 379 00:17:06,840 --> 00:17:09,320 Speaker 1: Do you think there's like a maternal instinct that's kicking in. 380 00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:11,639 Speaker 2: At this because it was the other way around? 381 00:17:11,960 --> 00:17:17,560 Speaker 3: Yeah, a pillow in somebody's face, No, no, no, but yeah, 382 00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:21,359 Speaker 3: so I think Nikano has really taken ownership of that 383 00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:25,480 Speaker 3: and really has appreciated, you know, what he means. Like 384 00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:28,200 Speaker 3: to her, she's like wanted to share her toys until 385 00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:29,119 Speaker 3: he reaches out for it. 386 00:17:29,240 --> 00:17:30,840 Speaker 2: Right Like, we'll see why when. 387 00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:34,000 Speaker 3: That happens, you know, But for now, she's taken ownership 388 00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:34,560 Speaker 3: and she loves it. 389 00:17:35,160 --> 00:17:39,040 Speaker 1: Did your parents ever tell you how it was? Because 390 00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:42,040 Speaker 1: you're the oldest, right, did your parents ever like tell 391 00:17:42,080 --> 00:17:44,480 Speaker 1: you stories about how it was when your sisters came 392 00:17:44,520 --> 00:17:46,520 Speaker 1: home and then you know what you're reaction. 393 00:17:49,600 --> 00:17:53,200 Speaker 3: I mean I was like, you know, this is a transformer, 394 00:17:53,359 --> 00:17:56,639 Speaker 3: you know. Yeah, like especially Stephanie. So I was a 395 00:17:56,640 --> 00:17:59,160 Speaker 3: little older with Stephanie, but but with Maryland, we were 396 00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:01,639 Speaker 3: one year apart, so it was kind of like, you know, 397 00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:02,879 Speaker 3: it wasn't as. 398 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:06,840 Speaker 1: Bad, right, yeah, you're apart, but I just was like it. 399 00:18:07,400 --> 00:18:10,280 Speaker 2: You know, I was a tiny earthquake, you know. 400 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:15,120 Speaker 3: So my mom has been very open about saying that 401 00:18:15,200 --> 00:18:17,080 Speaker 3: she really wanted to send me back but. 402 00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:18,840 Speaker 2: I really couldn't. 403 00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:20,000 Speaker 1: But uh yeah. 404 00:18:20,040 --> 00:18:22,520 Speaker 3: But but then as time went along, you know, I 405 00:18:22,560 --> 00:18:25,320 Speaker 3: put my efforts into soccer, you know, the things or whatever, 406 00:18:25,359 --> 00:18:27,000 Speaker 3: and I had all the outlets, you know, so I 407 00:18:27,200 --> 00:18:30,080 Speaker 3: became a lot more manageable. But my mom was like, man, 408 00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:31,919 Speaker 3: I hated on a restaurant with you. 409 00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:34,400 Speaker 2: It's like really really bad. 410 00:18:34,760 --> 00:18:37,680 Speaker 3: Oh we would you act up at on the table, 411 00:18:38,880 --> 00:18:41,040 Speaker 3: the table underneath the table. 412 00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:43,080 Speaker 2: You know, It's like you were that guy. I was 413 00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:43,600 Speaker 2: that dude. 414 00:18:43,880 --> 00:18:47,879 Speaker 1: Yeah, screaming at a restaurant. Yeah, screaming on an airplane 415 00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:49,160 Speaker 1: like that, I think. 416 00:18:49,359 --> 00:18:51,760 Speaker 3: Yeah, she did say in an airplane, I couldn't just 417 00:18:51,840 --> 00:18:54,960 Speaker 3: sit still, Yeah, I didn't jumping. 418 00:18:55,040 --> 00:18:56,680 Speaker 2: I had to be running around or whatever. So shout 419 00:18:56,680 --> 00:18:57,560 Speaker 2: out to all the parents. 420 00:18:57,920 --> 00:19:00,440 Speaker 3: Yeah who put you know, who put up with all 421 00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:03,200 Speaker 3: of that stuff early in your years. And and don't 422 00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:06,720 Speaker 3: feel shy to tell your sons and daughters. You know, 423 00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:08,879 Speaker 3: this is how you used to be, right, you. 424 00:19:09,119 --> 00:19:12,080 Speaker 1: Know, I do it, I do it. We we we 425 00:19:12,080 --> 00:19:14,159 Speaker 1: we we shared that with them. How they were My 426 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:16,960 Speaker 1: boys were so but they were they were cool man, 427 00:19:17,200 --> 00:19:20,320 Speaker 1: you know, and thank god they were. They were pretty 428 00:19:20,320 --> 00:19:22,639 Speaker 1: well behaved for the most part. I was such a 429 00:19:22,680 --> 00:19:24,720 Speaker 1: young dad. I'm like, I don't know how I would 430 00:19:24,760 --> 00:19:28,440 Speaker 1: have taken having sort of a hurricane in the house. 431 00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,840 Speaker 1: My youngest was a little more of like a hurricane. 432 00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:33,080 Speaker 1: But for the most part, it was good. And they 433 00:19:33,080 --> 00:19:35,240 Speaker 1: were partners in crime, you know, so they had each other. 434 00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:37,320 Speaker 1: So now you've given the kind of a partner in 435 00:19:37,359 --> 00:19:38,680 Speaker 1: crime and they're only what. 436 00:19:38,640 --> 00:19:40,720 Speaker 2: Four years apart? Yeah that's what changed. 437 00:19:40,760 --> 00:19:43,800 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's not bad. How far are you 438 00:19:43,880 --> 00:19:48,840 Speaker 1: and your youngest sister, younger think eight years? Eight years? 439 00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:51,720 Speaker 1: Oh wow, are you really eight years older? I didn't 440 00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:54,679 Speaker 1: realize that. Yeah, and you and you and Stephanie are 441 00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:55,520 Speaker 1: only a year apart. 442 00:19:56,280 --> 00:19:59,360 Speaker 3: I mean, Maryland, when you're a party eight years apart, 443 00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:00,880 Speaker 3: and so she was the ay always right. 444 00:20:00,960 --> 00:20:03,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, she came so late in the game. 445 00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:06,520 Speaker 1: I never realized that that she was that much younger 446 00:20:06,560 --> 00:20:06,800 Speaker 1: than you. 447 00:20:08,119 --> 00:20:10,199 Speaker 2: But she's phenomenal. She's like, it's such a grade. 448 00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:15,440 Speaker 3: Yeah, she's hilarious's dry, sarcastic, a little grumpy, but she's awesome. 449 00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:20,520 Speaker 1: And how are your parents reacting to the new addition 450 00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:21,159 Speaker 1: to the family. 451 00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:24,200 Speaker 3: I mean, it's true, but they say, like, your parents 452 00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:28,960 Speaker 3: are gonna love your children more than they love you, right, I. 453 00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:30,120 Speaker 1: Mean you see that already. 454 00:20:30,200 --> 00:20:34,720 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, it's like whatever they want, they get, you know, 455 00:20:35,960 --> 00:20:38,000 Speaker 3: but you know, we all know that we are going 456 00:20:38,080 --> 00:20:40,680 Speaker 3: to eventually inherit the job, you know, a good cup 457 00:20:40,720 --> 00:20:43,560 Speaker 3: back cup, Like, who's that good back up in your house? 458 00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:48,359 Speaker 1: I'm the good cop, yeah, Elsie. Elsie's the bad cop. 459 00:20:48,720 --> 00:20:51,840 Speaker 1: She was, you know, like I said, you know, it's 460 00:20:51,880 --> 00:20:55,480 Speaker 1: one of the downfalls of having kids. You're so young, 461 00:20:55,600 --> 00:20:57,680 Speaker 1: you know, Like I was like a teenager, so I 462 00:20:57,720 --> 00:21:00,920 Speaker 1: was still a kid myself, you know, uh, but but 463 00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:03,040 Speaker 1: but I was I was firm. I was firm, but 464 00:21:03,080 --> 00:21:05,760 Speaker 1: she was she was definitely a little more firm than 465 00:21:05,800 --> 00:21:06,040 Speaker 1: than I. 466 00:21:06,440 --> 00:21:15,240 Speaker 3: Feel like you were subliminately defaulting into what your parents did. 467 00:21:15,640 --> 00:21:16,439 Speaker 2: For you and with you. 468 00:21:16,800 --> 00:21:18,399 Speaker 1: I think so, right, because. 469 00:21:18,160 --> 00:21:20,840 Speaker 3: I'm like, I'm using the same terminologies and I look 470 00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:21,600 Speaker 3: myself in the middle. 471 00:21:24,359 --> 00:21:27,359 Speaker 1: Yeah, because what other example do you have, right, unless 472 00:21:27,359 --> 00:21:31,000 Speaker 1: you're like reading parenting books. You know, I didn't read 473 00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:34,119 Speaker 1: any parenting books. I was just like, you know, my 474 00:21:34,160 --> 00:21:35,840 Speaker 1: parents were old school, and I think they did a 475 00:21:35,840 --> 00:21:38,640 Speaker 1: pretty good job. So I just reverted to like what 476 00:21:38,840 --> 00:21:42,960 Speaker 1: they did, you know. Minus you know, and both of 477 00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:45,000 Speaker 1: our parents are from different well you know, my'm from 478 00:21:45,040 --> 00:21:47,520 Speaker 1: Puerto Rico, but different sort of countries per se, right, 479 00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:51,200 Speaker 1: And I think that's sometimes the parenting style or it's 480 00:21:51,240 --> 00:21:52,640 Speaker 1: a little different from over there. 481 00:21:52,720 --> 00:21:52,960 Speaker 2: Right. 482 00:21:53,119 --> 00:21:55,640 Speaker 1: You know, you got the chunk lit that right? 483 00:21:55,800 --> 00:21:58,760 Speaker 2: You can literally did you see it? In my eyes? 484 00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:03,440 Speaker 3: I believe in that because the image of the chuklit alone, yeah, 485 00:22:03,600 --> 00:22:08,760 Speaker 3: inspires discipline. You don't even have to use chunk unlikely 486 00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:13,080 Speaker 3: way from your foot to from your feet to your hands, right, Like, 487 00:22:13,160 --> 00:22:15,520 Speaker 3: you don't have to engage that just the symbol of 488 00:22:15,520 --> 00:22:16,040 Speaker 3: the chunk clit. 489 00:22:16,119 --> 00:22:18,280 Speaker 2: That's like, I don't know what that feels like. 490 00:22:19,080 --> 00:22:20,840 Speaker 1: And that's what I don't want to know what it feels. 491 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:22,639 Speaker 2: And I don't want to find out that's what my 492 00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:24,879 Speaker 2: dad did to me. Oh yeah, my dad. 493 00:22:25,960 --> 00:22:29,879 Speaker 3: My dad used like right, he used the belt, and 494 00:22:29,960 --> 00:22:31,320 Speaker 3: I didn't know what I was going to feel like, 495 00:22:31,480 --> 00:22:34,480 Speaker 3: and because I didn't know what it felt like, I 496 00:22:34,560 --> 00:22:37,760 Speaker 3: would just drop it whatever I was doing. 497 00:22:38,160 --> 00:22:40,440 Speaker 1: So so it never it never got there, and that never. 498 00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:44,800 Speaker 1: There was one time that my dad used. 499 00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:50,080 Speaker 2: Shoelace. The shoelace, yeah, he dunked it in water. 500 00:22:50,680 --> 00:22:50,960 Speaker 1: Huh. 501 00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:52,639 Speaker 3: He told me to put my hand on the front 502 00:22:53,160 --> 00:22:57,320 Speaker 3: and hit the top of my hand, not the palm, 503 00:22:57,800 --> 00:22:59,960 Speaker 3: just over the head, you know, like over the hand, 504 00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:02,919 Speaker 3: and he just like whipped it one time. 505 00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:05,080 Speaker 1: Why are your hand? Were you stealing? 506 00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:06,680 Speaker 2: No, my hand? 507 00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:10,000 Speaker 3: Because my mom was trying to reprimand me, and I 508 00:23:10,080 --> 00:23:12,040 Speaker 3: kind of stood up with my mom and it looked 509 00:23:12,080 --> 00:23:15,439 Speaker 3: like I was gonna, you know, raise my hand. Yeah 510 00:23:15,560 --> 00:23:18,960 Speaker 3: I didn't technically raise my hand, but like it looked 511 00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:21,440 Speaker 3: like I was standing up to my mom, and my Mom's. 512 00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:25,320 Speaker 2: Like, oh, okay, that's what we're gonna do now. She 513 00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:27,440 Speaker 2: called my dad. My dad drove home from work. 514 00:23:27,880 --> 00:23:31,560 Speaker 3: He drove home from work, and he my mom intersected 515 00:23:31,640 --> 00:23:35,119 Speaker 3: him at the front yard, and all I'm hearing's like 516 00:23:36,320 --> 00:23:38,040 Speaker 3: she's like, I'm just seeing their mouths move. 517 00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:39,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, I can't hear it. 518 00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:42,560 Speaker 3: But there was a clear shot from my bedroom across 519 00:23:42,640 --> 00:23:44,879 Speaker 3: the living room and into the front and out the 520 00:23:44,920 --> 00:23:47,120 Speaker 3: front door into the front yard where I could see 521 00:23:47,119 --> 00:23:49,520 Speaker 3: my parents from my room talking outside. 522 00:23:49,880 --> 00:23:51,520 Speaker 2: And then just like a movie. 523 00:23:51,880 --> 00:23:57,240 Speaker 3: My dad turns beams his eyes across the entire interior 524 00:23:57,280 --> 00:24:00,840 Speaker 3: of the house and into my bedroom run yard. 525 00:24:00,680 --> 00:24:04,640 Speaker 1: Like the clin Eastwoods, slow mo, like yeah. 526 00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:08,200 Speaker 3: And then he makes that content he goes, oh okay, yeah, 527 00:24:08,359 --> 00:24:12,119 Speaker 3: he walks in airthing snow motion, earthing's terrifying, and all 528 00:24:12,160 --> 00:24:13,760 Speaker 3: of a sudden, it's like me, me in the backyard, 529 00:24:13,800 --> 00:24:16,520 Speaker 3: and I go, this is how I die. I go 530 00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:19,080 Speaker 3: to the backyard. And the reason why I wanted to 531 00:24:19,119 --> 00:24:20,960 Speaker 3: go in the backyard because we used to have those 532 00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:24,639 Speaker 3: old the old tankers and the washing boards. You know, 533 00:24:24,760 --> 00:24:27,760 Speaker 3: my wife used to wash everything by hand. Oh right, 534 00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:30,240 Speaker 3: we didn't have washing and dryers, right, so my mom, 535 00:24:30,320 --> 00:24:32,840 Speaker 3: my mom would grab the clothes and wash it. You know, 536 00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:36,760 Speaker 3: she would board with the thing. But back then she 537 00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:40,040 Speaker 3: would just use the same clothes to to wear because 538 00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:42,920 Speaker 3: we didn't have the That was the fancy version I had, 539 00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:48,159 Speaker 3: like the ri. It was just like simple tank withdrained 540 00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:51,120 Speaker 3: and then the tank on the side with all the water, 541 00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:55,720 Speaker 3: so she you know, half a coconut boom water water 542 00:24:55,880 --> 00:24:59,240 Speaker 3: and then rains brains and then hang. My dad took 543 00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:02,400 Speaker 3: me over there to that place, grab this key chain 544 00:25:02,440 --> 00:25:04,399 Speaker 3: that had like one of those shoelaces that went like 545 00:25:04,520 --> 00:25:07,320 Speaker 3: spira spir spirer spiral and they had like a little slack. 546 00:25:07,080 --> 00:25:11,160 Speaker 2: At the end. He dipped it in the tank, put 547 00:25:11,160 --> 00:25:12,680 Speaker 2: me to hand my hand out and then. 548 00:25:13,600 --> 00:25:17,280 Speaker 3: One time and you know that like scream that it's 549 00:25:17,320 --> 00:25:21,320 Speaker 3: like a dog whistle, you know, somebody hits you at 550 00:25:21,320 --> 00:25:23,160 Speaker 3: the top of your head and you're just your your 551 00:25:23,280 --> 00:25:25,080 Speaker 3: know and your body is screaming. 552 00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:28,960 Speaker 2: But now the sound is not coming out. Oh oh 553 00:25:29,440 --> 00:25:30,600 Speaker 2: that's what I was experiencing. 554 00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:31,760 Speaker 1: Ah what. 555 00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:37,600 Speaker 4: Yeah, like your face is making the face the voice 556 00:25:37,680 --> 00:25:40,440 Speaker 4: is coming out, but voices not coming out. And they slowly, 557 00:25:40,840 --> 00:25:45,159 Speaker 4: a tiny little voice starts like bleeding through your vocals, you. 558 00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:50,119 Speaker 2: Know, all of a sudden it's like a full un scream. 559 00:25:50,560 --> 00:25:51,560 Speaker 2: That's how painful that was. 560 00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:54,320 Speaker 1: Oh, I never I never heard of that. I've never 561 00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:58,600 Speaker 1: heard of the shoelace, A wet wet shoelace on the knuckles. 562 00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:00,040 Speaker 2: You've never heard the heavier. 563 00:26:00,400 --> 00:26:03,120 Speaker 1: No, I get why, but I've just never heard that's 564 00:26:03,119 --> 00:26:05,280 Speaker 1: that's very creative. I wonder if that. 565 00:26:05,280 --> 00:26:07,480 Speaker 2: Was passed down like this, well, I mean it's. 566 00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:15,160 Speaker 3: Either that or like you know, power cable or or 567 00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:17,720 Speaker 3: like they just rip down one of the wires that 568 00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:20,640 Speaker 3: you hang your clothes on or yeah. 569 00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:22,200 Speaker 2: Or like one of those two. 570 00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:23,880 Speaker 3: But but you know, I will say, like it only 571 00:26:23,880 --> 00:26:26,760 Speaker 3: took that one time and I never again. 572 00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:27,679 Speaker 2: Yeah, you know. 573 00:26:28,000 --> 00:26:30,359 Speaker 3: And the idea is that, like they just have to 574 00:26:30,440 --> 00:26:32,600 Speaker 3: understand there's consequences to their actions. 575 00:26:32,600 --> 00:26:33,560 Speaker 2: And I think that's important. 576 00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:35,840 Speaker 3: And that's one thing I feel like the Latino community has, 577 00:26:36,160 --> 00:26:38,400 Speaker 3: you know, they all explained to you three times what's 578 00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:39,000 Speaker 3: kind of happened? 579 00:26:39,080 --> 00:26:42,199 Speaker 2: Yeah, right, Like it doesn't just come out of nowhere. 580 00:26:42,280 --> 00:26:44,520 Speaker 3: You know, you get strike one, strike two, strike three, 581 00:26:44,600 --> 00:26:47,199 Speaker 3: and then and then when the chant. 582 00:26:46,880 --> 00:26:49,000 Speaker 2: Gets right right or the belt? 583 00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:53,760 Speaker 1: Was that was that a conscious like decision in terms 584 00:26:53,800 --> 00:26:56,000 Speaker 1: of the parenting style or Amanda, when you know, I 585 00:26:56,040 --> 00:26:56,640 Speaker 1: think it was. 586 00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:58,080 Speaker 3: Like what you and I were talking about, all of 587 00:26:58,080 --> 00:27:00,320 Speaker 3: a sudden, it just woke up in you like sign 588 00:27:00,400 --> 00:27:02,520 Speaker 3: it uploaded from the parents. 589 00:27:03,160 --> 00:27:05,120 Speaker 1: It was and she was with it like that same. 590 00:27:05,240 --> 00:27:08,000 Speaker 3: Well, you know, look we yeah, so we've had the 591 00:27:08,000 --> 00:27:09,720 Speaker 3: conversation like where are we at with this? 592 00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:10,919 Speaker 2: What happens when this happens? 593 00:27:12,119 --> 00:27:14,159 Speaker 3: And you know, we're both like, I guess we're going 594 00:27:14,200 --> 00:27:16,959 Speaker 3: to find out when it does, you know. So we 595 00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:19,679 Speaker 3: didn't really have a plan for it, but we had 596 00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:23,560 Speaker 3: a philosophy that you know, you have to reason first. 597 00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:29,000 Speaker 3: Somebody has to understand that, you know, and just taking 598 00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:33,199 Speaker 3: the TV away it's not enough, like they have to 599 00:27:33,240 --> 00:27:36,520 Speaker 3: truly understand what would just happened, you know, and you know, 600 00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:40,520 Speaker 3: at this early age it's very primitive, it's very small, 601 00:27:40,720 --> 00:27:41,880 Speaker 3: very emotional for them. 602 00:27:41,920 --> 00:27:43,560 Speaker 2: It's just they can't control the emotions. 603 00:27:43,600 --> 00:27:45,720 Speaker 3: They don't know the measurements. And you got to meet 604 00:27:45,760 --> 00:27:48,040 Speaker 3: them where they're at so you can really communicate. That's 605 00:27:48,040 --> 00:27:59,479 Speaker 3: what I think. But how did it happen for you? 606 00:27:59,880 --> 00:27:59,920 Speaker 2: We? 607 00:28:00,520 --> 00:28:04,760 Speaker 1: You know, Elsie and I we come from very very 608 00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:07,600 Speaker 1: similar backgrounds. You know, we grew up a couple of 609 00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:12,240 Speaker 1: blocks from each other. So the parenting style just fit 610 00:28:12,400 --> 00:28:15,560 Speaker 1: right in because it was basically the same. Our parents 611 00:28:15,600 --> 00:28:18,639 Speaker 1: disciplined us the same and so we you know, we 612 00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:21,919 Speaker 1: had discussions about what we liked about it, what we didn't, 613 00:28:22,440 --> 00:28:25,040 Speaker 1: and you just kind of learn as you go along. Man. 614 00:28:25,080 --> 00:28:26,800 Speaker 1: You know, it's going to be trial and error. There's 615 00:28:26,800 --> 00:28:28,840 Speaker 1: gonna be mistakes, there's going to be stuff that works, 616 00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:30,960 Speaker 1: stuff that doesn't, and then eventually you just sort of 617 00:28:31,000 --> 00:28:31,520 Speaker 1: figured out. 618 00:28:31,880 --> 00:28:32,080 Speaker 2: You know. 619 00:28:32,960 --> 00:28:36,520 Speaker 1: I think that sometimes growing up old school, I think 620 00:28:36,560 --> 00:28:42,640 Speaker 1: that the disciplinary aspect of it is sometimes the scale 621 00:28:42,760 --> 00:28:45,040 Speaker 1: is unbalanced, right, it's tipped a little more to the 622 00:28:45,080 --> 00:28:48,400 Speaker 1: disciplinary aspect, you know, and I feel like that's no 623 00:28:48,520 --> 00:28:52,200 Speaker 1: good because then I feel like the kids rebel against you. 624 00:28:52,520 --> 00:28:56,000 Speaker 1: Right then there's a form of resentment that settles in. 625 00:28:56,720 --> 00:28:58,640 Speaker 1: But then if the scale is tipped the other way, 626 00:28:58,680 --> 00:29:01,800 Speaker 1: and it's like just just too much love and no discipline, 627 00:29:01,880 --> 00:29:04,640 Speaker 1: and then sometimes kids tend to walk all over you. 628 00:29:04,760 --> 00:29:04,960 Speaker 2: Yeah. 629 00:29:05,160 --> 00:29:08,000 Speaker 1: So, so I think that there's we decided really early 630 00:29:08,080 --> 00:29:10,200 Speaker 1: on that there was going to be a healthy balance 631 00:29:10,240 --> 00:29:12,400 Speaker 1: between the two and you never needed to, you said, 632 00:29:12,440 --> 00:29:14,600 Speaker 1: because obviously your kids felt like they were kind of 633 00:29:14,640 --> 00:29:17,880 Speaker 1: in line with the energy. You're, yeah, yeah, the energy. 634 00:29:17,920 --> 00:29:19,760 Speaker 1: That's a really good description of it. You know, we 635 00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:22,840 Speaker 1: set a tone, we set an energy, and you know, 636 00:29:23,560 --> 00:29:26,160 Speaker 1: kids aren't perfect, right, but but but for the most part, 637 00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:28,840 Speaker 1: they got it, you know, and I felt like we 638 00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:32,920 Speaker 1: implemented enough of that healthy balance that that it motivated 639 00:29:32,960 --> 00:29:35,320 Speaker 1: them to fall in line. 640 00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:38,280 Speaker 3: No, No, we we feel the I feel like we 641 00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:42,640 Speaker 3: have a very similar situation that kind of has really 642 00:29:42,760 --> 00:29:45,440 Speaker 3: taken to that frequency. You know, there's no fire drills 643 00:29:45,480 --> 00:29:48,640 Speaker 3: in this house, you know. So yeah, that's one thing. 644 00:29:48,680 --> 00:29:51,120 Speaker 3: I really will say that. It's like, it's beautiful to 645 00:29:51,160 --> 00:29:53,920 Speaker 3: see that n I kinda has just really comprehended. And 646 00:29:53,960 --> 00:29:56,680 Speaker 3: I will say it's probably the gift of being a girl. 647 00:29:57,440 --> 00:30:01,000 Speaker 3: She has developed so quickly. She's so smart. Yeah, she's 648 00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:04,640 Speaker 3: so intuitive, and she like, for example, like I'll tell 649 00:30:04,640 --> 00:30:05,840 Speaker 3: you this, tells you everything. 650 00:30:05,840 --> 00:30:07,720 Speaker 2: She's four years old. She comes up to me, she goes. 651 00:30:07,600 --> 00:30:09,520 Speaker 3: Daddy can have some of this candy, but after I 652 00:30:09,560 --> 00:30:11,840 Speaker 3: have my food, because otherwise I'm gonna have a Tommy ache. 653 00:30:13,600 --> 00:30:16,720 Speaker 1: She she knew you were going to say. 654 00:30:16,880 --> 00:30:19,320 Speaker 3: What your response was, That's okay, honey, that's a really 655 00:30:19,360 --> 00:30:20,000 Speaker 3: good idea. 656 00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:22,760 Speaker 2: OK, just do that. Absolutely you can have that. Yeah. 657 00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:25,240 Speaker 3: I mean so like the fact that she has the 658 00:30:25,280 --> 00:30:27,920 Speaker 3: sophistication to be like, I'm gonna predict what you're gonna say. 659 00:30:28,000 --> 00:30:29,600 Speaker 3: I'm gonna tell you I'm gonna do it anyways, but 660 00:30:29,640 --> 00:30:31,120 Speaker 3: I'm gonna but I want to have this. 661 00:30:31,360 --> 00:30:31,719 Speaker 4: Wow. 662 00:30:31,840 --> 00:30:35,600 Speaker 1: It's like where does she get that for three years old? Yeah? Right, 663 00:30:35,760 --> 00:30:38,280 Speaker 1: Like where do you get that foresight? Like you're so 664 00:30:38,440 --> 00:30:39,120 Speaker 1: aware of. 665 00:30:39,320 --> 00:30:40,160 Speaker 2: I think reputation? 666 00:30:40,400 --> 00:30:43,840 Speaker 3: Right's like you say it a few times and you're like, you, honey, 667 00:30:43,840 --> 00:30:45,560 Speaker 3: you can have that, but you have to have some 668 00:30:45,600 --> 00:30:47,760 Speaker 3: food because if you have that on an empty stomach, 669 00:30:47,800 --> 00:30:50,320 Speaker 3: your your tommy can get upset. Yeah, and you said 670 00:30:50,360 --> 00:30:52,400 Speaker 3: that in a few times that she's immediately like, I 671 00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:54,120 Speaker 3: don't want to get a tummy ache. And you know, 672 00:30:54,280 --> 00:30:57,200 Speaker 3: she doesn't have a sweet tooth, but she wants candy, 673 00:30:57,440 --> 00:30:59,200 Speaker 3: but she'll have like the one bite and then she 674 00:30:59,240 --> 00:31:01,360 Speaker 3: doesn't finish it. She wants ice cream, but she'll have 675 00:31:01,400 --> 00:31:04,560 Speaker 3: like the one two scoops. So I think like for her, 676 00:31:04,600 --> 00:31:06,880 Speaker 3: it's that kind of the ceremonial thing or having something 677 00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:09,480 Speaker 3: that kind of like makes her happy, you know. And 678 00:31:09,520 --> 00:31:11,520 Speaker 3: I think it's very cool that she like practice up 679 00:31:11,520 --> 00:31:12,840 Speaker 3: and she doesn't excessively do it. 680 00:31:12,880 --> 00:31:15,479 Speaker 1: So how do you how do you feel about And 681 00:31:15,520 --> 00:31:18,000 Speaker 1: this is where we differ. You know, my kids are older, right, 682 00:31:18,080 --> 00:31:21,200 Speaker 1: so like I was bringing them up before the sort 683 00:31:21,240 --> 00:31:25,600 Speaker 1: of the social media and the invention of social media, right, Like, 684 00:31:26,120 --> 00:31:28,000 Speaker 1: how do you feel now having a four year old 685 00:31:28,040 --> 00:31:31,160 Speaker 1: and a newborn. It's just so different, Like people ask me, 686 00:31:31,800 --> 00:31:34,520 Speaker 1: how would you have been raising your kids? I don't know. 687 00:31:34,560 --> 00:31:36,360 Speaker 1: I don't know how I would have been, right, because 688 00:31:36,400 --> 00:31:39,200 Speaker 1: it's like social media is such an integral part of 689 00:31:40,920 --> 00:31:44,360 Speaker 1: even their social circles, right, and and them being young 690 00:31:44,440 --> 00:31:47,720 Speaker 1: and being kids and being teenagers, and so how do 691 00:31:47,800 --> 00:31:51,040 Speaker 1: you how do you how do you strike a balance 692 00:31:51,080 --> 00:31:52,840 Speaker 1: with that or how do you I mean, obviously you 693 00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:55,120 Speaker 1: must not be dealing with that yet, not yet, but. 694 00:31:55,120 --> 00:31:58,680 Speaker 3: We are constantly talking about it because you know, she 695 00:31:58,800 --> 00:32:00,520 Speaker 3: has other friends already have like. 696 00:32:00,560 --> 00:32:05,240 Speaker 2: Little reass wow at that a tablet. 697 00:32:04,920 --> 00:32:08,920 Speaker 1: In their hands, right, you know, but where they're watching 698 00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:09,719 Speaker 1: like cartoons. 699 00:32:09,720 --> 00:32:11,440 Speaker 2: And still like there's people. 700 00:32:11,200 --> 00:32:13,720 Speaker 3: In her life right now that are like, you know, 701 00:32:14,160 --> 00:32:17,240 Speaker 3: i'd like, you know, they come in to hang out 702 00:32:17,240 --> 00:32:20,320 Speaker 3: with her and they go to a corner and they're 703 00:32:20,360 --> 00:32:23,120 Speaker 3: just watching, watching the table the entire time for like 704 00:32:23,160 --> 00:32:27,840 Speaker 3: eight hours, so you know, and I get the preference, right, 705 00:32:27,880 --> 00:32:31,280 Speaker 3: Like some parents are okay with that, parents are monitoring 706 00:32:31,320 --> 00:32:34,680 Speaker 3: w they're watching, and that's fine too, but I'm gonna 707 00:32:34,720 --> 00:32:38,600 Speaker 3: delay that as much as possible. She watching a movie 708 00:32:39,320 --> 00:32:44,560 Speaker 3: is a decompression reward, not like not like you ate 709 00:32:44,600 --> 00:32:46,080 Speaker 3: your food, now you get to watch a movie. 710 00:32:46,280 --> 00:32:47,080 Speaker 2: But we don't do that. 711 00:32:47,600 --> 00:32:50,240 Speaker 3: So it's kind of like, you know, we're gonna eat 712 00:32:50,240 --> 00:32:52,920 Speaker 3: our food, get ready for bed, and then we'll see 713 00:32:52,920 --> 00:32:56,000 Speaker 3: how if it's late or early, and then if it's 714 00:32:56,360 --> 00:32:58,240 Speaker 3: if it's too late, we're gonna go to sleepy time. 715 00:32:58,440 --> 00:33:00,520 Speaker 3: And if it's early enough, then we can watch a 716 00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:05,080 Speaker 3: few minutes and more. Oftentimes it's too late, right, it's 717 00:33:05,080 --> 00:33:06,960 Speaker 3: like closer to eight, and you're like, well, we got 718 00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:07,400 Speaker 3: to go down. 719 00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:08,600 Speaker 2: And so she understands that. 720 00:33:09,440 --> 00:33:12,200 Speaker 3: She understands that, you know, maybe she got distracted and 721 00:33:12,280 --> 00:33:14,800 Speaker 3: kind of burned some of the time before she got 722 00:33:14,840 --> 00:33:18,479 Speaker 3: ready to go to sleep, and so I remind her, so, honey, 723 00:33:18,480 --> 00:33:20,000 Speaker 3: you were running around a lot, you were playing a 724 00:33:20,040 --> 00:33:22,920 Speaker 3: lot with your other toys, and therefore, now we don't 725 00:33:22,920 --> 00:33:24,680 Speaker 3: have enough time to watch the you know, a little 726 00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:26,880 Speaker 3: bit of the movie. She's like, okay, Daddy, you're right, 727 00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:29,000 Speaker 3: and then, you know, so she's a very conscience of that. 728 00:33:30,120 --> 00:33:32,120 Speaker 3: But it is a struggle because I know that it's 729 00:33:32,120 --> 00:33:34,440 Speaker 3: coming right. I know if there is a tidal wave 730 00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:38,200 Speaker 3: of not wanting to miss out on what's happening in 731 00:33:38,240 --> 00:33:41,720 Speaker 3: the world, especially when your friends are talking about it 732 00:33:41,760 --> 00:33:42,200 Speaker 3: all the time. 733 00:33:42,240 --> 00:33:44,120 Speaker 1: You don't want to be the odd but becomes part 734 00:33:44,160 --> 00:33:45,640 Speaker 1: of the social fabric of her. 735 00:33:45,880 --> 00:33:48,400 Speaker 3: So I think to me, I'm going to try my 736 00:33:48,440 --> 00:33:50,920 Speaker 3: best to delay the arrival of that as possible and 737 00:33:51,160 --> 00:33:55,840 Speaker 3: as late as possible. And you know, she still likes 738 00:33:55,960 --> 00:33:58,120 Speaker 3: she still loves reading books. She's four and a half. 739 00:33:58,160 --> 00:34:00,000 Speaker 2: She likes reading a book before you goes to sleep. 740 00:34:01,400 --> 00:34:04,840 Speaker 3: I like telling her stories about this young princess named 741 00:34:04,880 --> 00:34:06,880 Speaker 3: Na Kinda that lived in a mountain and how to 742 00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:10,160 Speaker 3: you know, had a friend unicorn who could fly, and 743 00:34:10,280 --> 00:34:12,880 Speaker 3: she went down to the village and save the town. 744 00:34:13,040 --> 00:34:16,719 Speaker 3: And she was the smartest and brightest and you know, 745 00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:20,719 Speaker 3: most powerful, you know, young princess of the land, and like, 746 00:34:21,600 --> 00:34:23,080 Speaker 3: you know, and like, so I would tell these stories 747 00:34:23,080 --> 00:34:24,839 Speaker 3: and she's like thinking about it and like and then 748 00:34:24,880 --> 00:34:27,480 Speaker 3: she fought a dragon and she overcame that and saved 749 00:34:27,480 --> 00:34:27,920 Speaker 3: the people. 750 00:34:28,080 --> 00:34:30,560 Speaker 2: I call. So I can tell all these fantastic stories 751 00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:31,200 Speaker 2: and she loves. 752 00:34:31,480 --> 00:34:35,120 Speaker 1: So you're regulating sort of the TV time, movie time 753 00:34:35,200 --> 00:34:36,000 Speaker 1: with books. 754 00:34:35,840 --> 00:34:38,520 Speaker 3: Like it's okay to listen to a story and it's 755 00:34:38,560 --> 00:34:42,000 Speaker 3: okay to read a book. So I think she does 756 00:34:42,040 --> 00:34:43,520 Speaker 3: it right now. She's not like I want to watch 757 00:34:43,520 --> 00:34:44,239 Speaker 3: the TV I wanted to be. 758 00:34:44,280 --> 00:34:44,799 Speaker 2: I want to be. 759 00:34:45,239 --> 00:34:47,520 Speaker 3: She wants to play. She wants to connect with people. 760 00:34:47,560 --> 00:34:48,960 Speaker 3: Like if I'm in the office, she wants to go 761 00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:51,400 Speaker 3: play with, you know, with Leo, you know, our producer. 762 00:34:51,520 --> 00:34:54,799 Speaker 3: She wants to play with Lauren, our executive assistant. Like 763 00:34:54,840 --> 00:34:57,120 Speaker 3: she you know, she wants to connect with people right now, 764 00:34:57,160 --> 00:34:58,440 Speaker 3: and so we're trying to really. 765 00:34:58,280 --> 00:35:00,480 Speaker 2: Expose her to as much all that's possible. But but 766 00:35:00,560 --> 00:35:01,040 Speaker 2: to your. 767 00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:05,200 Speaker 3: Point, like who knows when when all her friends are 768 00:35:05,239 --> 00:35:07,080 Speaker 3: like did you see this and she's like, you know. 769 00:35:08,640 --> 00:35:12,440 Speaker 1: Yeah, or the or the images of when she gets older, right, 770 00:35:12,560 --> 00:35:15,920 Speaker 1: the images of of what her peer group is saying 771 00:35:16,080 --> 00:35:17,720 Speaker 1: she should and even when he gets. 772 00:35:17,560 --> 00:35:20,680 Speaker 3: When she gets her cell phone, freddie, Yeah, I'm going 773 00:35:20,719 --> 00:35:24,960 Speaker 3: to tell her always rather talk on the phone then 774 00:35:25,120 --> 00:35:25,960 Speaker 3: text somebody. 775 00:35:26,719 --> 00:35:28,440 Speaker 1: Yeah, Like you. 776 00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:32,080 Speaker 3: Got to keep that alive, your ability to communicate with 777 00:35:32,120 --> 00:35:35,920 Speaker 3: another human, receiving the energy, feeling each other's moods, Like, 778 00:35:36,280 --> 00:35:39,600 Speaker 3: you know, if you want to use the phone, call somebody, 779 00:35:40,520 --> 00:35:43,040 Speaker 3: don't just text them. I'm going to try to see 780 00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:45,759 Speaker 3: how long she can go with continue to communicate with people, 781 00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:48,640 Speaker 3: because that's how you develop your ability to conversate and 782 00:35:48,680 --> 00:35:51,840 Speaker 3: have real life conversations with people that are not hidden 783 00:35:51,880 --> 00:35:52,960 Speaker 3: behind a text chain. 784 00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:53,200 Speaker 2: You know. 785 00:35:53,560 --> 00:35:55,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's funny you say that. I was talking to 786 00:35:57,400 --> 00:36:00,120 Speaker 1: a kid, will Say and he was like, yeah, I'm 787 00:36:00,120 --> 00:36:02,359 Speaker 1: hanging out with my friends this weekend. And I was like, oh, 788 00:36:02,480 --> 00:36:04,920 Speaker 1: that's cool. Are they coming over your house or are 789 00:36:04,960 --> 00:36:07,359 Speaker 1: you going there? He goes, no, we don't go over 790 00:36:07,400 --> 00:36:10,799 Speaker 1: each other's houses. We're going to hang out online. And 791 00:36:10,840 --> 00:36:11,720 Speaker 1: it blew my mind. 792 00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:12,800 Speaker 2: I was like, that's how. 793 00:36:12,640 --> 00:36:13,279 Speaker 1: You hang out. 794 00:36:13,440 --> 00:36:14,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, what's fun in that? 795 00:36:14,719 --> 00:36:16,880 Speaker 1: You know, Yeah, that's how And he was looking at 796 00:36:16,920 --> 00:36:19,160 Speaker 1: me like I was crazy, you know, like yeah, that's 797 00:36:19,200 --> 00:36:21,920 Speaker 1: how we do it now, you know. It blew my 798 00:36:21,960 --> 00:36:25,239 Speaker 1: mind that that that the kids, you know, I'm sure 799 00:36:25,320 --> 00:36:27,239 Speaker 1: not all kids in this generation, but a lot of 800 00:36:27,280 --> 00:36:30,320 Speaker 1: them sort of lock that sort of like social interaction 801 00:36:30,800 --> 00:36:33,080 Speaker 1: and then much rather do it in like chat rooms, 802 00:36:33,200 --> 00:36:35,400 Speaker 1: and you know it's crazy. 803 00:36:35,560 --> 00:36:36,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, it is crazy. 804 00:36:37,560 --> 00:36:39,600 Speaker 3: Well, I mean, we wish all the parents at home, 805 00:36:39,840 --> 00:36:43,719 Speaker 3: you know, all the serenity or the peace, all the happiness, 806 00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:46,800 Speaker 3: you know, and we're definitely trying to call through it it. 807 00:36:46,840 --> 00:36:48,799 Speaker 3: We don't have all the answers here, but we're trying 808 00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:49,719 Speaker 3: to figure it out as we go. 809 00:36:49,880 --> 00:36:53,399 Speaker 2: And thank you to everyone who related to the chunk 810 00:36:53,840 --> 00:36:55,839 Speaker 2: and look it up. 811 00:36:56,080 --> 00:36:57,560 Speaker 1: And for those of you who don't know what it is, 812 00:36:57,600 --> 00:36:58,720 Speaker 1: look up chunk lit. 813 00:36:58,920 --> 00:37:03,400 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a mystical artifact from our ancient years, mystic 814 00:37:03,640 --> 00:37:05,200 Speaker 3: rtifest you know, I think it was. 815 00:37:05,280 --> 00:37:08,279 Speaker 2: It dates back to the Aztecs. Actually, yeah, that's where 816 00:37:08,280 --> 00:37:09,359 Speaker 2: the Chacolta was born. 817 00:37:10,040 --> 00:37:13,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, but they where they perfected the throwing style. 818 00:37:14,640 --> 00:37:17,120 Speaker 3: If you like those amigos, share with a friend, tell 819 00:37:17,160 --> 00:37:19,360 Speaker 3: him where to watch film, tell him where to listen 820 00:37:19,400 --> 00:37:21,520 Speaker 3: to And this episode was helpful. 821 00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:24,200 Speaker 2: I love you guys, Thank you. This is Wilmer. 822 00:37:24,000 --> 00:37:27,800 Speaker 3: Valdorama, Freddie Rodriguez, and you watched and listened to those Amigos. 823 00:37:27,880 --> 00:37:28,560 Speaker 3: See you next time. 824 00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:35,960 Speaker 1: Those Amigos is a production from w V Sound and 825 00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:40,160 Speaker 1: iHeartMedia's Michael through That Podcast Network, hosted by Me, Freddie 826 00:37:40,200 --> 00:37:42,200 Speaker 1: Rodriguez and Wilmer of Aaldorama. 827 00:37:42,360 --> 00:37:46,560 Speaker 3: Those Amigos is produced by Aaron Burleson and Sophie Spencers Abos. 828 00:37:46,560 --> 00:37:51,239 Speaker 1: Our executive producers are Wilmer Valdorama, Freddie Rodriguez, Aaron Burlson, 829 00:37:51,440 --> 00:37:53,560 Speaker 1: and Leo Klem at w V sound. 830 00:37:53,840 --> 00:37:56,120 Speaker 3: This episode was shot and ended it by Ryan Posts 831 00:37:56,200 --> 00:37:59,239 Speaker 3: and mixed by Sean Tracy and features original music by 832 00:37:59,239 --> 00:38:00,919 Speaker 3: Madison Devin and Halo boy. 833 00:38:01,080 --> 00:38:04,520 Speaker 1: Our cover art photography is by David Avalos and designed 834 00:38:04,600 --> 00:38:05,480 Speaker 1: by Deny. 835 00:38:05,320 --> 00:38:08,439 Speaker 3: Holtzklau and thank you for being here third Amigo today. 836 00:38:08,440 --> 00:38:10,719 Speaker 3: I appreciate you guys always listening to those amos. 837 00:38:10,920 --> 00:38:13,080 Speaker 1: For more podcasts from My Heart, visit the ir Heart 838 00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:16,359 Speaker 1: Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your 839 00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:17,120 Speaker 1: favorite shows. 840 00:38:17,360 --> 00:38:18,200 Speaker 2: See you next week.