WEBVTT - Disrupt 0:00:01.080 --> 0:00:02.240 Attention Shoppers. 0:00:02.320 --> 0:00:06.920 Attention Shoppers Employees Only is an improvised comedy podcast about 0:00:06.920 --> 0:00:11.000 an official big box store. Any similarity to real stores 0:00:11.119 --> 0:00:13.960 or real people is completely coincidental. 0:00:17.720 --> 0:00:21.720 Okay, love your hair, are you doing those curls? Or 0:00:21.880 --> 0:00:23.120 was that like a curly guys? 0:00:23.160 --> 0:00:25.680 I just need everybody in the break room to please 0:00:25.880 --> 0:00:26.599 pay attention. 0:00:26.680 --> 0:00:27.760 Okay, I just please. 0:00:28.680 --> 0:00:32.919 All right, So we found that missing mannequin. It had 0:00:32.960 --> 0:00:36.000 just been misplaced out on the loading doc and uh, 0:00:36.159 --> 0:00:39.760 I want to personally apologize to Victor for accusing him 0:00:39.800 --> 0:00:40.600 of taking it home. 0:00:40.800 --> 0:00:42.479 I'm glad it wasn't you, Victor. 0:00:42.920 --> 0:00:44.440 In your defense, it could have been me. 0:00:44.920 --> 0:00:47.120 Yeah, yeah, you you were the prime suspect. 0:00:47.240 --> 0:01:00.160 I often look around the store in search of companions. 0:00:57.400 --> 0:00:57.920 Everything. 0:01:02.400 --> 0:01:05.720 Oh, follow up there, Jerry, did you talk to corporate 0:01:05.760 --> 0:01:08.440 about getting me a new mop bucket? The one that 0:01:08.480 --> 0:01:11.200 I've been using still has a hairline fracture on the side. 0:01:11.200 --> 0:01:14.520 No, no, no, not now, Victory, Okay, because I've got a 0:01:14.560 --> 0:01:17.600 really important announcement, and that is that we are not 0:01:17.800 --> 0:01:22.440 getting a new shipment of that energy drink disrupt that 0:01:22.520 --> 0:01:26.280 all the middle schoolers love. It says here in this memo. 0:01:26.360 --> 0:01:30.200 It's it's sale has been suspended pending a legal ruling 0:01:30.240 --> 0:01:31.120 by the FDA. 0:01:33.280 --> 0:01:33.679 I don't know. 0:01:34.280 --> 0:01:36.920 Luckily, we still have plenty of it in the store 0:01:36.959 --> 0:01:39.880 because all those eighth graders they come in here after 0:01:39.920 --> 0:01:42.080 school to buy it, and if they don't get there fixed, 0:01:42.440 --> 0:01:45.880 they are gonna set this place on fire. 0:01:46.160 --> 0:01:48.200 Guys, what is that swarping sound? 0:01:48.400 --> 0:01:50.800 Oh? Yeah, no, we are all drinking Disrupt. You have 0:01:50.840 --> 0:01:54.360 to suck it through this special nozzle. It's patented. Actually 0:01:54.360 --> 0:01:57.640 they call it the squeeze. Disrupt isn't just a drink, though, 0:01:57.680 --> 0:01:58.920 It's more of an experience. 0:01:59.280 --> 0:02:02.160 Yeah, I mean, Jerry, it's the world's only energy drink 0:02:02.240 --> 0:02:04.919 slash game fuel slash meal replacement. 0:02:05.160 --> 0:02:08.120 People spend so much time like eating food when you 0:02:08.160 --> 0:02:11.560 could just disrupt that cycle with Disrupt. 0:02:11.680 --> 0:02:14.840 And it comes in like three flavors money, hustle, and bright. 0:02:14.960 --> 0:02:17.440 Actually it's the same flavor, just different colors. 0:02:17.919 --> 0:02:20.720 Yeah, puzzle and grind taste similar to similar. 0:02:20.760 --> 0:02:23.040 Okay, wait, we're running out of this stuff and y'all 0:02:23.080 --> 0:02:24.240 just drank a case of it. 0:02:24.400 --> 0:02:25.320 How much is left? 0:02:26.320 --> 0:02:29.240 Okay, listen, I want every bottle that is left rocked 0:02:29.280 --> 0:02:32.400 to me. Okay, we need to establish a one bottle 0:02:32.440 --> 0:02:36.359 per customer policy or those twins are gonna riot and 0:02:36.560 --> 0:02:39.040 uh before we open the store? Can I try a 0:02:39.080 --> 0:02:41.600 bottle because it looks it's kind of a fun looking 0:02:41.680 --> 0:02:42.919 I'd like to have a little sip. 0:02:43.680 --> 0:02:48.480 Okay, see the squeeze and then this nozzle. 0:02:50.120 --> 0:02:51.440 Ow, it hurts a little bit. 0:02:52.280 --> 0:02:52.920 You got to bite? 0:02:55.440 --> 0:02:57.519 Yeah, I like it. It does burn. 0:02:57.680 --> 0:03:05.639 By Oh mercy? 0:03:05.680 --> 0:03:09.680 Okay, Victor, go ahead, tell us what's so dang amusing? 0:03:10.200 --> 0:03:10.480 Well? 0:03:11.760 --> 0:03:14.919 Did you see the actor Timothy Shallo May was spotted 0:03:15.000 --> 0:03:18.480 kissing and canoodling with Kylie Jenner at a Beyonce concert? 0:03:19.120 --> 0:03:21.280 Victor, are you trying to make small talk again? 0:03:21.919 --> 0:03:25.240 Yes? I was told to try to initiate conversations about 0:03:25.320 --> 0:03:29.079 fun current events. I'm on a sort of a small 0:03:29.120 --> 0:03:30.200 talk reddit for uhim. 0:03:30.480 --> 0:03:35.240 Oh okay, it's not working, But good try, Victor, good try. 0:03:35.320 --> 0:03:38.360 But is it not interesting that Timothy Shallomet was spotted 0:03:38.440 --> 0:03:41.560 kissing and canoodling with Kylie Jenner at a Beyonce concert? 0:03:41.640 --> 0:03:44.640 Is he really hot or is he not? Because Kylie 0:03:44.640 --> 0:03:46.680 has a makeup line right, because like maybe she can 0:03:46.760 --> 0:03:49.040 draw some muscles on him, because without a shirt, he's 0:03:49.160 --> 0:03:51.800 Charlie Brown's Christmas tree I don't think he could pick 0:03:51.880 --> 0:03:55.000 up the bar that we put weight on to work 0:03:55.040 --> 0:03:58.000 out by some girls forget about it. I mean like 0:03:58.480 --> 0:04:01.360 Tibby Alice raises me put him against the wall and 0:04:01.400 --> 0:04:03.800 say move your toes up and down. I think we're 0:04:03.840 --> 0:04:05.800 maxing out at like three reps. 0:04:06.200 --> 0:04:06.720 Is he hot? 0:04:06.800 --> 0:04:09.400 You have to tell me if you think I don't understand. 0:04:10.040 --> 0:04:12.160 H No, I don't think he is hot. I'm more 0:04:12.200 --> 0:04:14.800 into a guy with like muscles and like facial hair 0:04:15.000 --> 0:04:18.280 and tattoos and the same age as my dad and 0:04:18.320 --> 0:04:22.160 maybe like a scar from where he was dad three. 0:04:21.920 --> 0:04:22.400 Out of five? 0:04:22.880 --> 0:04:23.640 Which three? 0:04:24.120 --> 0:04:24.920 How old is your dad? 0:04:25.200 --> 0:04:25.640 I don't know. 0:04:25.760 --> 0:04:28.200 He left before he could tell you his age. 0:04:28.400 --> 0:04:31.240 Yeah, it's like so tragic. This is good small talk. 0:04:31.279 --> 0:04:32.960 Victure does a second you fall in love with the 0:04:33.000 --> 0:04:36.159 Kardashian Your mind starts to unravel, and I am here 0:04:36.200 --> 0:04:38.440 for it. I can't wait to see what happens. Is 0:04:38.480 --> 0:04:40.520 Timothy going to show up to the like Oscars wearing 0:04:40.520 --> 0:04:42.840 a maga hat? Oh also have a site note. I 0:04:42.839 --> 0:04:45.120 think that's why Pete Davidson made it out fine, because 0:04:45.120 --> 0:04:46.480 he was already unraveled. 0:04:46.600 --> 0:04:48.960 I like his sad eyes. It also sort of makes 0:04:48.960 --> 0:04:52.200 sense when you think about the concept of celebrity. Beyonce 0:04:52.800 --> 0:04:56.039 is the Queen Bee, and she rules over all the 0:04:56.120 --> 0:05:01.000 lesser celebrity drones like Kylie Jenner and Timothay shallow Mate, 0:05:01.320 --> 0:05:03.880 whipping them into a mating frenzy so that they can 0:05:03.920 --> 0:05:06.599 produce a master race of celebrity uber minch to rule 0:05:06.680 --> 0:05:07.119 us all. 0:05:07.279 --> 0:05:08.000 They need one of those. 0:05:08.040 --> 0:05:10.120 You'll have a couple names, but it's like hard because 0:05:10.200 --> 0:05:13.640 Timilli sounds like something rednecks named their daughters, and Kylothe 0:05:13.760 --> 0:05:16.640 sounds like a colon medication. No, trust me, listen, try 0:05:16.720 --> 0:05:19.320 Kylothy to solve all of your colon health issues. Right, 0:05:19.400 --> 0:05:20.400 it's so spooky. 0:05:20.960 --> 0:05:22.119 Wait does it work though? 0:05:22.240 --> 0:05:23.960 What's going on with your colon? Timbo? 0:05:24.279 --> 0:05:26.840 Nothing? It's fine, what's going on with yours? 0:05:27.160 --> 0:05:29.880 Kylie Jenner's a billionaire and she's entitled to the same 0:05:30.120 --> 0:05:34.760 anorrectic movie star arm candy as any male billionaire. That's feminism. 0:05:35.160 --> 0:05:36.640 I wish Liz was here to back me up on 0:05:36.680 --> 0:05:37.120 that one. 0:05:37.279 --> 0:05:40.880 The name is confusing and his brand is confusing. Is 0:05:40.920 --> 0:05:43.719 he like a beta little cockboy or is he like 0:05:43.720 --> 0:05:46.880 an alpha babe player who spits game? Is constantly macin 0:05:46.960 --> 0:05:49.480 on like the most number ten out of ten women 0:05:49.600 --> 0:05:52.760 in the game. It's so confused. What is a man 0:05:52.880 --> 0:05:56.120 supposed to be? Someone tell me now. 0:05:56.240 --> 0:05:58.520 Timba, just schedule push ups. You need to calm down 0:05:59.240 --> 0:06:00.640 and your necker like me. 0:06:01.520 --> 0:06:04.719 There were these pics of Timothy smoking. It's like finding 0:06:04.720 --> 0:06:07.359 out your baby brother is smoking. You're hanging out with 0:06:07.400 --> 0:06:10.279 the wrong crowd, Timothy. This new girl is teaching you 0:06:10.360 --> 0:06:12.960 bad habits. You need to focus on your studies. 0:06:13.120 --> 0:06:15.719 Anyone see that Timothay shallowy movie Bones and All, where 0:06:15.720 --> 0:06:18.960 he's like a cannibal eats human flesh. Well, if I 0:06:19.040 --> 0:06:21.200 were him, I make sure that she didn't see it 0:06:21.240 --> 0:06:25.120 at this meet cute stage in their relationship. I once 0:06:25.200 --> 0:06:28.320 let a perspective girlfriend see me at a competitive eating contest, 0:06:28.360 --> 0:06:30.120 and that was a deal breaker. 0:06:30.640 --> 0:06:31.760 What date was this? 0:06:31.920 --> 0:06:33.640 There was a there was a young woman checking out 0:06:33.680 --> 0:06:36.200 at Home Goods, and while she was waiting in line, 0:06:36.240 --> 0:06:39.640 I started a conversation and showed her a video of 0:06:39.680 --> 0:06:42.960 me at a competitive eating contest on my phone. She 0:06:43.080 --> 0:06:45.880 checked out and I never saw the fair damsel again. 0:06:46.200 --> 0:06:49.320 My worldview almost erupted for a second, but it's better now. 0:06:49.520 --> 0:06:51.440 It was a nice date, though, y'all need to give 0:06:51.520 --> 0:06:54.279 Kylie a break. I would be so happy to have 0:06:54.440 --> 0:06:57.200 those seats at our Beyonce concert. I would have met 0:06:57.200 --> 0:06:58.280 out with Rudy Giuliani. 0:06:58.400 --> 0:07:00.200 Bye. 0:07:01.720 --> 0:07:04.200 Oh, my feet are killing me. 0:07:04.920 --> 0:07:08.240 Oh yeah, my dogs are barking as well, say Marcia. 0:07:08.520 --> 0:07:11.080 If you see this latest news from the Ukraine. 0:07:11.160 --> 0:07:15.880 God damn it, Victor. Quit bringing up Ukraine as small talk. 0:07:16.080 --> 0:07:17.160 It's not good small talk. 0:07:17.280 --> 0:07:20.520 Okay, well, you're so right, you're so right. Yeah. So, apparently, 0:07:20.560 --> 0:07:23.960 according to this new biography, Elon Musk had a satellite 0:07:24.080 --> 0:07:27.920 network deactivated to prevent a Ukrainian drone attack on Russia. 0:07:28.440 --> 0:07:30.840 I mean, this book claims that Musk did it because 0:07:30.840 --> 0:07:33.480 he thought he was preventing a nuclear conflict. 0:07:33.680 --> 0:07:36.120 Oh my god, Russia needs to do something new, like, 0:07:36.160 --> 0:07:39.200 I don't know, invade somebody, maybe one of the Koreas, 0:07:39.240 --> 0:07:40.680 just to stay like fresh and buzzy. 0:07:40.760 --> 0:07:41.000 You know. 0:07:41.360 --> 0:07:44.560 Elon Musk is good at turning things off. That makes 0:07:44.600 --> 0:07:46.600 me drier than an asphalt after street cleaning. 0:07:46.640 --> 0:07:50.640 I'm kinda team Husky Musky on this one. Really, yes, Okay, 0:07:50.640 --> 0:07:52.800 if you're a bagillionaire, you should be allowed to hit 0:07:52.840 --> 0:07:55.120 whatever buttons you want and then like cause a war. 0:07:55.640 --> 0:07:59.240 That's the entire point of being rich. That makes it fun. 0:08:00.480 --> 0:08:03.400 Real human lives like they're an app game on your phone. 0:08:03.960 --> 0:08:05.840 When I play the SIMS, I drowned everybody. 0:08:06.000 --> 0:08:09.280 Okay, Elon is a genius. So he's playing two dimensional 0:08:09.440 --> 0:08:11.600 chess and we don't even know what's going on in 0:08:11.640 --> 0:08:14.440 his head. Okay, he was the first man to come 0:08:14.520 --> 0:08:17.400 up with the idea of trying to own outer space. 0:08:17.920 --> 0:08:20.480 We look up there and we think that's space. That's 0:08:20.480 --> 0:08:23.600 for everyone. He thinks, no, that's for me. 0:08:24.080 --> 0:08:26.520 Okay, did he say that on Joe Rogan or something. 0:08:26.760 --> 0:08:30.440 I can't help but notice that he said two dimensional chess. Yeah, 0:08:30.560 --> 0:08:32.080 that's right, flat chess. 0:08:32.280 --> 0:08:35.040 We're out here trying to play one dimensional chess and 0:08:35.040 --> 0:08:36.920 he's playing two dimensional chess. 0:08:37.040 --> 0:08:39.520 Oh my god, stop talking about dimensions. It's making me 0:08:39.600 --> 0:08:40.520 drier than Mercia. 0:08:40.840 --> 0:08:43.920 I think that the satellite just accidentally exploded or something. 0:08:44.160 --> 0:08:46.520 And now he's just making the story up because he'd 0:08:46.600 --> 0:08:49.400 rather be thought of as a Bond villain than a 0:08:49.559 --> 0:08:50.480 total dumb ass. 0:08:50.760 --> 0:08:54.640 Elon satellite do not explode unless he wants them to explode, 0:08:54.800 --> 0:08:58.400 which maybe sometimes he does. Because he's playing two dimensional 0:08:58.480 --> 0:09:00.800 chess and you can't even see next. 0:09:00.640 --> 0:09:02.360 Movie, right, you'd only be able to see it if 0:09:02.360 --> 0:09:04.000 you were right above it. 0:09:04.200 --> 0:09:06.800 People always say like, oh, one person shouldn't have all 0:09:06.800 --> 0:09:10.319 that power. But let me explain something. There are wolves 0:09:10.640 --> 0:09:14.240 and there are sheep, okay, and Elon is a wolf, 0:09:14.520 --> 0:09:19.440 but he's a good wolf. So Ukraine is a sheep 0:09:19.679 --> 0:09:24.160 and Elon is a wolf and Russia okay, so there's 0:09:24.200 --> 0:09:27.160 two wolves, right. Russia is a wolf and Elon is 0:09:27.160 --> 0:09:30.360 the other wolf, and they're both like, these are my sheep. 0:09:30.559 --> 0:09:33.760 And then Ukraine's like, no, hold on, actually though, we 0:09:33.840 --> 0:09:37.080 bought weapons, so now we're a wolf. So there's three wolves. 0:09:37.120 --> 0:09:38.800 I'm gonna go over by the whiteboard and try to 0:09:38.840 --> 0:09:39.400 work this out. 0:09:39.480 --> 0:09:42.800 Look it up. There's data to support all of this. 0:09:43.360 --> 0:09:46.200 Just google it, oh, think for yourself and find it 0:09:46.240 --> 0:09:46.760 on the internet. 0:09:46.840 --> 0:09:48.800 Yeah, because I mean, we're sheep, right, No. 0:09:49.040 --> 0:09:51.560 Inside of every one of us, it's three wolves that 0:09:51.600 --> 0:09:53.319 have eaten the sheep that was there. 0:09:53.400 --> 0:09:55.920 But how many of the wolves are in sheep's clothing? 0:09:57.679 --> 0:10:02.720 By by w. 0:10:04.880 --> 0:10:08.000 And that's also a great place to hide merchandise that 0:10:08.040 --> 0:10:11.200 you've stolen from your job. Thank you so much for watching. 0:10:11.240 --> 0:10:12.400 Please like and subscribe. 0:10:12.559 --> 0:10:16.000 Okay, shy la, See you are your influencer. Tip, okay, girl, 0:10:16.120 --> 0:10:16.520 get it. 0:10:16.679 --> 0:10:19.520 Yes, obviously with this body, I'm also an influencer. But 0:10:19.640 --> 0:10:21.520 here's the thing. You gotta be careful the way you 0:10:21.559 --> 0:10:25.320 do that, because influencer very quickly becomes something else, like 0:10:25.520 --> 0:10:28.720 that influencer Danielle Miller who just got five years in prison. 0:10:28.920 --> 0:10:31.040 Her rand was like luxury, but she funded the whole 0:10:31.040 --> 0:10:33.800 thing by stealing people's identities and taking out COVID loans 0:10:33.800 --> 0:10:35.920 in their name, and then she used that money on 0:10:36.000 --> 0:10:39.040 private jets and luxury apartments and stuff. And at that point, 0:10:39.120 --> 0:10:42.400 like you're not influencing, you're doing I don't know, I 0:10:42.400 --> 0:10:43.640 guess just straight up crime. 0:10:44.160 --> 0:10:49.160 Dang, oh my god. How could you steal someone's identity? No, like, seriously, 0:10:49.200 --> 0:10:50.840 how could you do it? I really want to try that. 0:10:50.960 --> 0:10:53.480 I mean, she took out special COVID assistance loans for 0:10:53.559 --> 0:10:57.280 businesses and then use them to pay for a luxury apartment. 0:10:57.600 --> 0:10:57.800 Way. 0:10:57.840 --> 0:10:59.959 I say, there were only two flaws in those other 0:11:00.200 --> 0:11:05.440 was perfect plan one highly illegal, two blatantly displayed on 0:11:05.559 --> 0:11:09.360 Instagram for all to see. You must be secretive when 0:11:09.360 --> 0:11:10.840 you work against the machine. 0:11:11.000 --> 0:11:13.240 That is so true. If you're gonna steal stuff. You 0:11:13.240 --> 0:11:15.440 can't put it on Instagram. You have to post it 0:11:15.440 --> 0:11:18.839 where nobody goes, like Facebook, our LinkedIn. I mean this 0:11:19.040 --> 0:11:21.560 fur coat I lifted. I've only ever warned it in 0:11:21.600 --> 0:11:23.640 my profile pick for classmates dot Com. 0:11:23.720 --> 0:11:27.320 To be an influencer is to be the apex of humanity. Okay, 0:11:27.559 --> 0:11:30.640 they're a rare breed. They're alpha humans and the laws 0:11:30.640 --> 0:11:33.240 of regular humans don't apply to them, and they should 0:11:33.240 --> 0:11:36.000 really only be tried in the court of other influencers 0:11:36.120 --> 0:11:39.200 because those are their only peers. So if Addison Ray 0:11:39.559 --> 0:11:43.000 and Logan Paul say you're guilty, then the High Council 0:11:43.080 --> 0:11:45.720 has spoken and your followers must be revoked. 0:11:45.800 --> 0:11:49.000 I just support anything she does. Okay, this, that's just seriously, 0:11:49.120 --> 0:11:50.760 my queen. She had to pretend to be like ten 0:11:50.800 --> 0:11:53.280 different people, create fake ideas for all of them, apply 0:11:53.400 --> 0:11:56.560 for loans in their name, and she still picks like 0:11:56.600 --> 0:12:00.160 the perfect filter that exactly matched her outfit. Okay, if 0:12:00.160 --> 0:12:01.880 she was a man, she would be in the White 0:12:01.880 --> 0:12:03.199 House because she isn't. 0:12:03.040 --> 0:12:05.480 Nailing it truly, so it's quite a bit of talent. 0:12:05.520 --> 0:12:07.959 I mean, she wasted tax payer money on an excessively 0:12:08.040 --> 0:12:11.560 lavish lifestyle, but ultimately the only difference between her and 0:12:11.600 --> 0:12:14.800 a US senator is that she has more sway with voters. 0:12:15.600 --> 0:12:19.160 I'm talking about these clowns in Washington. 0:12:19.520 --> 0:12:21.840 You know, you know we got it. 0:12:22.600 --> 0:12:28.520 These bozos in the capital. Oh, I love, I love 0:12:28.559 --> 0:12:30.560 giving them a little roast every now and then. 0:12:31.000 --> 0:12:34.200 Pair for your luxury lifestyle with money that's been set 0:12:34.240 --> 0:12:36.680 aside to help people during COVID. I mean, not only 0:12:36.720 --> 0:12:39.400 do you deserve five years in prison, girl, you deserve 0:12:39.480 --> 0:12:42.160 five years of COVID, the new kind that they don't 0:12:42.200 --> 0:12:43.960 have a dang vaccine for yet. 0:12:44.160 --> 0:12:45.560 I don't have a vaccine for any of them. 0:12:45.640 --> 0:12:48.760 Yes, sweetie, I work in the pharmacy. I think I know. 0:12:49.040 --> 0:12:52.199 Oh no, they have one. They just don't do what 0:12:52.320 --> 0:12:53.199 you think they did. 0:12:53.280 --> 0:12:54.720 What do you think they do? Timbo? 0:12:55.320 --> 0:12:57.520 What do you think they do? Marsha? 0:12:57.840 --> 0:13:04.040 By damn it, I can't find any more cases of 0:13:04.080 --> 0:13:07.240 disrupt And those eighth graders are savaging our store in 0:13:07.280 --> 0:13:08.760 the online customer survey. 0:13:08.920 --> 0:13:12.320 Look, they're gonna tank our rating of Jerry. 0:13:12.800 --> 0:13:15.200 I gotta have a word with you about that mop bucket. 0:13:16.880 --> 0:13:17.040 Look. 0:13:17.160 --> 0:13:20.600 And then they're also spamming us the negative comments. I 0:13:20.600 --> 0:13:23.840 think they're creating fake accounts. Look, this one's called baby 0:13:23.920 --> 0:13:27.520 Yoda and this one's called pussy Slayer fourteen. That's not 0:13:28.080 --> 0:13:31.360 a normal handle, damn it. Eighth graders are so good 0:13:31.400 --> 0:13:34.840 at using the internet. Come on, Victor, we gotta find 0:13:34.880 --> 0:13:37.679 more disrupt There's there's gotta be a case somewhere in 0:13:37.720 --> 0:13:38.079 the store. 0:13:38.120 --> 0:13:44.400 Come on, man, Okay, hey you got it. 0:13:44.520 --> 0:13:48.720 No, I got it. Forty eight pack of Disrupt Crime Flavor, 0:13:48.880 --> 0:13:50.760 the last one on the loading dot. 0:13:51.000 --> 0:13:52.480 That is so perfect. 0:13:52.640 --> 0:13:53.160 Oh my god. 0:13:53.160 --> 0:13:54.840 With the shortage, I'm gonna be able to charge like 0:13:54.920 --> 0:13:57.720 fifty dollars a pop for this. We're gonna get wrech. 0:13:58.000 --> 0:14:00.880 I just have to make sure that this product is pure. 0:14:01.440 --> 0:14:03.439 Yeah, test it. This is the real stuff. 0:14:05.040 --> 0:14:07.640 Oh my god, Timber, where are your pecks dancing? That's 0:14:07.679 --> 0:14:09.320 super Just like that's upsetting. 0:14:09.360 --> 0:14:11.520 They just do that. I did some electra shock this 0:14:11.640 --> 0:14:13.320 morning and now I can't really control it. 0:14:14.200 --> 0:14:19.440 Oh hi, Marsha, are you guys running a disrupt black 0:14:19.640 --> 0:14:22.920 market out of the break room? Oh my god? 0:14:23.760 --> 0:14:28.800 Maybe yeah? Yeah, Oh my god, y'all, come on, Marsha, 0:14:29.120 --> 0:14:31.160 be cool. It's like totally fine. 0:14:31.280 --> 0:14:34.200 You should be cool for once in your life, marshalling. 0:14:33.960 --> 0:14:36.160 Once in my life. Oh oh, you don't think I'm cool. 0:14:36.320 --> 0:14:37.760 I'm cool. I'm cool. 0:14:37.880 --> 0:14:39.920 If you're real cool, you'd buy a bottle of Disrupt 0:14:40.000 --> 0:14:40.320 right now. 0:14:40.360 --> 0:14:42.040 Let me get one. Then, let me get one. Then 0:14:42.240 --> 0:14:44.280 you don't think I'm cool, I'm cool. I'll take the 0:14:44.280 --> 0:14:46.800 bottle of what is this grind? Grindlap, I'll take a. 0:14:46.800 --> 0:14:50.040 Grind okay, okay for you and I think Marshall, let's 0:14:50.080 --> 0:14:51.720 do like fifty. 0:14:51.400 --> 0:14:56.000 Three fifty three Okay, I see, I see what this is. Okay, 0:14:56.120 --> 0:14:57.360 you know what. I'm gonna go ahead and just tell 0:14:57.440 --> 0:14:59.840 Jerry what y'all are doing here in the break. 0:15:00.520 --> 0:15:02.120 But then you're just gonna go ahead and not drink 0:15:02.160 --> 0:15:03.680 any because he's just gonna sell it to all of 0:15:03.680 --> 0:15:05.200 our stupid customers. 0:15:05.880 --> 0:15:08.000 Okay, you got a point. They are very dumb. I'll 0:15:08.000 --> 0:15:09.840 be back. I'm gonna go to atm. 0:15:09.520 --> 0:15:13.920 Bye Way, Timbo. 0:15:14.560 --> 0:15:16.400 Why are you all wet. 0:15:16.440 --> 0:15:20.080 Because I work on the loading dock and it's raining outside? 0:15:20.200 --> 0:15:22.400 Oh my god, Speaking of rain, did you guys see 0:15:22.400 --> 0:15:25.280 those videos from Burning Matt It like rained a lot, 0:15:25.320 --> 0:15:26.840 and then they had to shut down the festival to 0:15:26.840 --> 0:15:29.480 try and get everybody out. They were like trapped in 0:15:29.520 --> 0:15:34.640 their cars for eight hours trying to get out hilarious. 0:15:34.880 --> 0:15:37.640 Oh damn it. I knew I should have gone this year. 0:15:38.000 --> 0:15:40.280 There were stranded billionaires out there that could have used 0:15:40.320 --> 0:15:43.400 my natural alpha hunter skills. I could have caught desert 0:15:43.400 --> 0:15:45.360 animals to cook for them while they listened to all 0:15:45.360 --> 0:15:47.520 my good business ideas. I have this idea for a 0:15:47.560 --> 0:15:52.720 restaurant called Side Hustle, whereas just Side. 0:15:53.560 --> 0:15:55.840 So it's sort of like Boston Market, but without the 0:15:55.920 --> 0:15:56.760 rotisserie Chicken. 0:15:56.960 --> 0:15:59.640 It's not like Boston Market because it's just Side. 0:15:59.680 --> 0:15:59.960 Okay. 0:16:00.360 --> 0:16:02.440 You know, I've read that Chris Rock was there, and 0:16:02.520 --> 0:16:04.960 imagine you're like in the middle of all this Burning 0:16:05.000 --> 0:16:09.120 Man stuff and you see Chris Rock. You'd be like, oh, yeah, 0:16:09.320 --> 0:16:10.760 the drugs are kicking in. 0:16:11.440 --> 0:16:13.520 People know you can do drugs in the city too, right, 0:16:13.760 --> 0:16:15.760 Everyone at Burning Man is like, I want to do shrooms, 0:16:15.760 --> 0:16:17.239 but I also want it to be complicated. 0:16:17.240 --> 0:16:20.040 For no reason, it's interesting that the Burning Man organizers 0:16:20.080 --> 0:16:26.800 are essentially saying Burning Man is a festival emphasizing self reliance, transgression, spirituality, 0:16:26.960 --> 0:16:30.280 oneness with the earth. That said, if it rains, we 0:16:30.360 --> 0:16:31.160 will have to cancel. 0:16:31.440 --> 0:16:33.400 I don't know why these people were freaking out. It 0:16:33.480 --> 0:16:37.320 is page one of every single entrepreneur book I have ever, 0:16:37.400 --> 0:16:43.200 mostly read Disaster Equals Opportunity. Right, that many disruptors with 0:16:43.280 --> 0:16:46.360 that much hiahuasca out of the box solutions must have 0:16:46.360 --> 0:16:49.680 been flying left and right. They're probably like invented weather 0:16:49.800 --> 0:16:54.120 controlling technology that we will now use to fix climate change. 0:16:54.280 --> 0:16:55.320 Right on burning Man. 0:16:55.720 --> 0:16:58.840 Seriously, though, I have to applaud the naivete that you 0:16:58.880 --> 0:17:03.320 can burn a giant Wickerman on ancient Native American land 0:17:03.560 --> 0:17:07.040 while seventy thousand people open their third eye and not 0:17:07.240 --> 0:17:09.879 incur the wrath of Chaak, the rain god. 0:17:10.480 --> 0:17:12.760 I went two years ago. It was so white I 0:17:12.800 --> 0:17:14.520 started calling it sunburning Man. 0:17:15.000 --> 0:17:15.440 Bye. 0:17:15.680 --> 0:17:21.080 Well, oh my god, Jerry is such an old ball sack. 0:17:21.560 --> 0:17:23.680 He was complaining about the way I was dressed. Again. 0:17:23.800 --> 0:17:26.320 He's like, Sul, you have to talk in your polo 0:17:26.480 --> 0:17:28.280 to your slacks. I should be able to wear my 0:17:28.320 --> 0:17:29.440 clothes the way I want. 0:17:29.560 --> 0:17:34.440 Absolutely. I mean, what is this China? Yeah? What China 0:17:34.600 --> 0:17:37.280 is trying to pass a law where they can fine 0:17:37.480 --> 0:17:40.359 or detain you if you wear clothing with symbols that 0:17:40.520 --> 0:17:44.159 quote undermine the spirit or hurt the feelings of the 0:17:44.280 --> 0:17:45.160 Chinese nation. 0:17:45.560 --> 0:17:47.600 Yeah, I mean, look, half of my clothes hurt my 0:17:47.680 --> 0:17:50.280 own feelings. Now I gotta worry about the countries. 0:17:50.520 --> 0:17:53.480 Come on, some of you might say this new law 0:17:53.560 --> 0:17:56.520 is unfair, but to say that is disrespectful to the 0:17:56.600 --> 0:18:00.199 honest and forthright Chinese leaders who will eventually crush are 0:18:00.240 --> 0:18:05.320 weak and decaying American nation. They listen through our phones. 0:18:05.680 --> 0:18:08.359 I understand not wanting to hurt China steilings. I always 0:18:08.440 --> 0:18:11.160 use the chopsticks in a Chinese restaurant, but I think 0:18:11.520 --> 0:18:14.800 dropping food all over their booth ends up being more 0:18:14.840 --> 0:18:17.280 offensive than just using a fork. You know what I'm saying. 0:18:17.440 --> 0:18:19.720 I don't want them taking over Their government is way 0:18:19.760 --> 0:18:21.960 more oppressive. In the US, you could wear like a 0:18:22.000 --> 0:18:24.680 tube top and pajama bottom support and you might still win. 0:18:25.200 --> 0:18:26.879 I mean, that's what I wore when I got out 0:18:26.880 --> 0:18:27.800 of that traffic ticket. 0:18:28.119 --> 0:18:30.320 I think we need that law at Buywell because I 0:18:30.320 --> 0:18:35.760 find our customer's clothing extremely upsetting. All those tank tops 0:18:35.840 --> 0:18:41.760 and just so much sunburnt skin. I have nightmares about melanoma. 0:18:42.280 --> 0:18:43.920 And that's hard for me to say, because like, that's 0:18:43.960 --> 0:18:46.359 not really a black people thing. That's y'all's culture. And 0:18:46.400 --> 0:18:48.920 I'm sorry for bringing it into the conversation right now. 0:18:49.000 --> 0:18:51.639 No, honestly, thank you. I feel like people aren't talking 0:18:51.720 --> 0:18:54.879 about my culture enough, so thank you for that. I, 0:18:55.000 --> 0:19:00.320 for one, welcome a massive corporate takeover and the earned 0:19:00.400 --> 0:19:04.040 discipline imposed by the Chinese leaders who will finally with 0:19:04.240 --> 0:19:06.639 the decaying husk of America into shape. 0:19:07.359 --> 0:19:09.680 They're always watching, Victor. 0:19:09.760 --> 0:19:11.920