1
00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:07,960
Speaker 1: It doesn't matter what island will rock, what continent you from.

2
00:00:06,720 --> 00:00:09,639
Speaker 2: Black is black. And I'm fitting approof right now.

3
00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:15,520
Speaker 3: That is absolutely right Because everything that my grandmother and

4
00:00:15,640 --> 00:00:17,400
Speaker 3: my mother and my aunts used to get on me

5
00:00:17,440 --> 00:00:21,360
Speaker 3: about as a kid, I'm doing to my kids in

6
00:00:21,400 --> 00:00:22,720
Speaker 3: the name of cleanliness.

7
00:00:23,480 --> 00:00:24,120
Speaker 2: Dead Ass.

8
00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:29,600
Speaker 1: It all started with real talk, unfiltered, honest and straight

9
00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:31,640
Speaker 1: from the heart. Since then, we've gone on to become

10
00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:35,080
Speaker 1: Webby award winning podcasters in New York Times bestselling authors.

11
00:00:35,159 --> 00:00:37,680
Speaker 3: Dead Ass was more than a podcast for us. It

12
00:00:37,760 --> 00:00:41,080
Speaker 3: was about our growth, a place where we could be vulnerable.

13
00:00:40,760 --> 00:00:43,960
Speaker 2: Be raw, orse, but most apportly be us.

14
00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:46,959
Speaker 3: But as we know, life keeps evolving and so do we,

15
00:00:47,040 --> 00:00:50,519
Speaker 3: and through it all, one thing has never changed. This

16
00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:55,080
Speaker 3: is after because we got a lot to talk about.

17
00:00:56,120 --> 00:01:00,000
Speaker 1: All right, storytime, Story time, So I'm gonna tell y'all

18
00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:04,840
Speaker 1: funny story. Me and my cousin Devonne and my brother Brian.

19
00:01:05,120 --> 00:01:09,640
Speaker 1: I'm eight, Davon's nine, Brian is six. We with Auntie.

20
00:01:09,880 --> 00:01:12,520
Speaker 1: Auntie comes back from college. She takes us to play

21
00:01:12,520 --> 00:01:15,080
Speaker 1: basketball and stuff. So we out with Auntie. We go

22
00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:17,880
Speaker 1: play basketball at Nazareth Gym. Right, we come back home

23
00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:19,759
Speaker 1: and say Hey, y'all go get a shower, come back,

24
00:01:19,880 --> 00:01:23,040
Speaker 1: but dinner right. So us being boys, like we typically,

25
00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:25,920
Speaker 1: we all get all towel, we run into the bathroom right,

26
00:01:26,240 --> 00:01:28,120
Speaker 1: put on the shower, and we stand there and we

27
00:01:28,200 --> 00:01:31,200
Speaker 1: bullshit and we laugh because we think it's funny that

28
00:01:31,280 --> 00:01:33,120
Speaker 1: they think we take a showers and we not. I

29
00:01:33,120 --> 00:01:35,039
Speaker 1: don't know why we thought that was funny, but it's not.

30
00:01:35,440 --> 00:01:36,440
Speaker 2: So we're sitting there.

31
00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:37,720
Speaker 3: Who's idea was that? First of all?

32
00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:40,520
Speaker 1: First of all, it was it was me collective, no, no, no.

33
00:01:40,920 --> 00:01:42,960
Speaker 1: DeVaughn first of all was just like, yo, let me

34
00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:44,520
Speaker 1: show you something. And I was like, I just turned

35
00:01:44,520 --> 00:01:46,320
Speaker 1: the water on and I turned it off. They think

36
00:01:46,319 --> 00:01:47,080
Speaker 1: I took a shower.

37
00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:50,760
Speaker 2: Would leader? And then I was bro But but I'm

38
00:01:51,040 --> 00:01:51,600
Speaker 2: honest with you.

39
00:01:52,000 --> 00:01:54,600
Speaker 1: I was like, Yo, let's do it. Why I don't know,

40
00:01:54,680 --> 00:01:56,320
Speaker 1: but it was just to be due down, you know

41
00:01:56,360 --> 00:01:58,160
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. So we stayed in it with the

42
00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:02,200
Speaker 1: water running, just waste lord. We turned the water off.

43
00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:06,040
Speaker 1: Right the minute we turned the water off, boom bust.

44
00:02:06,040 --> 00:02:09,840
Speaker 1: In the bathroom. We're like, yo, Auntie were naked. She's like, oh, y'all,

45
00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:12,520
Speaker 1: wasn't getting in the shower. I said, we was just

46
00:02:12,560 --> 00:02:15,120
Speaker 1: in the shower. First of all, we're done, we ate right, we.

47
00:02:15,160 --> 00:02:18,359
Speaker 4: All bone dry, but claim we just got out in

48
00:02:18,360 --> 00:02:24,919
Speaker 4: the shower, right, and this is her salty behind the ear.

49
00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:29,800
Speaker 4: Get your ass in the shower, turn the shower back on,

50
00:02:29,919 --> 00:02:31,360
Speaker 4: and said, if I come back in here and y'all

51
00:02:31,360 --> 00:02:33,160
Speaker 4: not wet, it's gonna be consequenceous.

52
00:02:33,600 --> 00:02:35,520
Speaker 1: So we was like, I don't want to get beat

53
00:02:35,520 --> 00:02:37,880
Speaker 1: with a belt. But so we all ended up getting

54
00:02:37,880 --> 00:02:41,560
Speaker 1: in the shower. But it was like, why is that

55
00:02:41,639 --> 00:02:45,880
Speaker 1: a thing for all kids to avoid? And why is

56
00:02:45,919 --> 00:02:49,200
Speaker 1: it the thing for all black moms, aunts and sisters

57
00:02:49,320 --> 00:02:51,400
Speaker 1: to inspect you after?

58
00:02:51,720 --> 00:02:52,440
Speaker 3: Absolutely?

59
00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:55,600
Speaker 1: Because we know you went through that too as Caribbean,

60
00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:56,280
Speaker 1: as a Caribbean.

61
00:02:56,360 --> 00:02:58,359
Speaker 2: Absolutely, so that's what we're gonna do now.

62
00:02:58,440 --> 00:02:59,959
Speaker 3: So was it just boys and girls?

63
00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:03,560
Speaker 1: It was everybody getting inspected that we're gonna go take

64
00:03:03,560 --> 00:03:05,519
Speaker 1: a break, come back, and I'm gonna ask some of

65
00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:07,960
Speaker 1: the Caribbean people and hear my Jamaican masthew.

66
00:03:08,440 --> 00:03:10,320
Speaker 2: Have y'all been through the same blackisms?

67
00:03:10,600 --> 00:03:13,520
Speaker 3: I can get back and bet my last dollar absolute

68
00:03:13,720 --> 00:03:18,040
Speaker 3: gonna find all right karaoke time? Oh wait, I had

69
00:03:18,040 --> 00:03:18,920
Speaker 3: a heroky song?

70
00:03:19,080 --> 00:03:21,560
Speaker 2: You got one? Let me hear it, Let me hear it,

71
00:03:21,600 --> 00:03:22,880
Speaker 2: let me karaoke.

72
00:03:24,440 --> 00:03:26,000
Speaker 3: I lost it. It was I feel like it was

73
00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:27,919
Speaker 3: a reggae song about about bathing.

74
00:03:28,120 --> 00:03:30,880
Speaker 2: Yes, oh my gosh, oh.

75
00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:36,400
Speaker 3: Oh, you're brush your teeth from morning? You know, from morning?

76
00:03:37,200 --> 00:03:37,920
Speaker 5: Was that Red Rad?

77
00:03:38,680 --> 00:03:38,960
Speaker 3: Was it?

78
00:03:39,320 --> 00:03:42,120
Speaker 2: Or was that what's his name from flat Bush?

79
00:03:42,160 --> 00:03:45,120
Speaker 3: I forget who? It was a little vicious AnyWho. Well,

80
00:03:45,240 --> 00:03:46,960
Speaker 3: you think of what you were thinking of, Josh, But

81
00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:49,080
Speaker 3: the song I was thinking of is pretty much he says,

82
00:03:49,120 --> 00:03:51,920
Speaker 3: you're brush your teeth from morning. Mmm, you watch your

83
00:03:51,920 --> 00:03:55,480
Speaker 3: fears from morning? And then the something something something. I

84
00:03:55,480 --> 00:03:57,000
Speaker 3: think I hear toothbrush calling.

85
00:03:57,640 --> 00:04:00,120
Speaker 2: I think I hear a toolbrush. Colin, I know what

86
00:04:00,160 --> 00:04:00,880
Speaker 2: song you're talking about.

87
00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:02,560
Speaker 3: Because the reason I love this song was because my

88
00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:04,600
Speaker 3: uncle used to tease my eye all the time. Emil

89
00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:05,840
Speaker 3: used to sing it, so you used to look at

90
00:04:05,840 --> 00:04:07,440
Speaker 3: her sometimes when she wake up in the morning. She'd

91
00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:10,200
Speaker 3: be like, you brush your teeth from money? So is he?

92
00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:12,240
Speaker 3: And you will put her name in it, and I'd

93
00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:14,960
Speaker 3: be like, bro. She used to just laugh. They were

94
00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:16,240
Speaker 3: they were super cute when they were young.

95
00:04:16,360 --> 00:04:18,520
Speaker 2: Josh will figure it out. Let's take a break, and

96
00:04:18,560 --> 00:04:20,240
Speaker 2: when we get back. Yeah, we'll come.

97
00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:22,200
Speaker 3: Back with op no op, right, and Josh'll find figure

98
00:04:22,200 --> 00:04:23,479
Speaker 3: out the song that we were talking about.

99
00:04:23,520 --> 00:04:24,960
Speaker 2: Have you bushed your teeth from morning?

100
00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:27,320
Speaker 3: Absolutely?

101
00:04:28,880 --> 00:04:29,520
Speaker 2: Absolutely?

102
00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:33,200
Speaker 3: Let me see your nostrils? All right, and we're back.

103
00:04:34,720 --> 00:04:38,440
Speaker 3: Let's jump into op or no op. Where's my pedal here?

104
00:04:38,440 --> 00:04:40,799
Speaker 3: It is all right? What we got today? Going on trips?

105
00:04:41,080 --> 00:04:45,000
Speaker 6: Okay, I saw something on the internet recently, and I

106
00:04:45,120 --> 00:04:47,400
Speaker 6: want to know if y'all have an opinion.

107
00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:51,200
Speaker 7: Or not op or no op? Is a BBL A

108
00:04:51,400 --> 00:04:56,000
Speaker 7: deal breaker? He got real quiet?

109
00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:57,799
Speaker 3: Is a b BE able to deal break.

110
00:05:00,080 --> 00:05:05,599
Speaker 2: One? Definitely is? I don't want it. I got this, okay,

111
00:05:06,120 --> 00:05:10,960
Speaker 2: the same as Matthew, Josh. I don't want it. If

112
00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:14,000
Speaker 2: you're gonna bebl from the Bronx fact, I don't.

113
00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:17,960
Speaker 8: I don't really have a problem with BBA. First off,

114
00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:21,200
Speaker 8: I prefer natural. I'll be fine with completely. My wife

115
00:05:21,240 --> 00:05:23,960
Speaker 8: is natural. I'm completely fine with that. However, if there

116
00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:25,840
Speaker 8: was a situation where she wanted to be b A, I'll

117
00:05:25,839 --> 00:05:28,200
Speaker 8: be fine with it. I just know that I will

118
00:05:28,200 --> 00:05:31,719
Speaker 8: give my opinion on the appearance of the DBL because

119
00:05:32,320 --> 00:05:34,520
Speaker 8: I gotta look at it. I gotta walk with you

120
00:05:34,720 --> 00:05:36,640
Speaker 8: with other people looking at it, and I don't want

121
00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:37,480
Speaker 8: you to be a distraction.

122
00:05:37,680 --> 00:05:38,520
Speaker 3: You got to be in it.

123
00:05:39,080 --> 00:05:41,320
Speaker 8: I gotta be in it, right. I ain't mad at

124
00:05:41,360 --> 00:05:43,440
Speaker 8: being in it. Not in it right, you know what

125
00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:46,960
Speaker 8: I'm saying. But yeah, I got real strong opinions about

126
00:05:46,960 --> 00:05:47,839
Speaker 8: how the BBL looks.

127
00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:49,479
Speaker 2: I just want the legs to match. Like.

128
00:05:49,520 --> 00:05:52,760
Speaker 1: You can't look like ant life proportion, Like, you can't

129
00:05:52,760 --> 00:05:55,680
Speaker 1: walk around looking like a bumblebee cheer legs. Yeah, you

130
00:05:55,680 --> 00:05:59,799
Speaker 1: can't have cheers, Yeah, the wisdom, wisdom, truth, ant life,

131
00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:01,920
Speaker 1: humble bee, you can't look like that. But if it's

132
00:06:01,920 --> 00:06:04,479
Speaker 1: a good BBO and yet your legs are proportion and

133
00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:07,040
Speaker 1: you're working out in the midsection matches, I don't see

134
00:06:07,080 --> 00:06:07,640
Speaker 1: nothing wrong with that.

135
00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:10,880
Speaker 8: And our purpose is by saying I don't really care

136
00:06:10,920 --> 00:06:13,080
Speaker 8: about what anybody does. You can do whatever you want

137
00:06:13,120 --> 00:06:15,719
Speaker 8: for your own self and your self esteem and your parents.

138
00:06:16,720 --> 00:06:19,479
Speaker 8: If I have an opinion, I will give my opinion

139
00:06:19,520 --> 00:06:20,960
Speaker 8: to that BBL and.

140
00:06:20,920 --> 00:06:21,479
Speaker 2: How it looks.

141
00:06:21,600 --> 00:06:24,760
Speaker 3: If asked, gotcha, gotcha? I kind of feel the same way.

142
00:06:24,839 --> 00:06:27,480
Speaker 3: My ap is that I'm all for a woman a man,

143
00:06:27,480 --> 00:06:29,560
Speaker 3: whoever the person is. Like Josh said, if that makes

144
00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:31,599
Speaker 3: you feel better about yourself or if you have certain

145
00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:33,880
Speaker 3: insecurities that you feel like you can fix with a

146
00:06:33,920 --> 00:06:36,800
Speaker 3: little nip, a little tuck, a little suction, and I say,

147
00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:37,200
Speaker 3: go for it.

148
00:06:37,279 --> 00:06:39,640
Speaker 2: You welcome in all BBO allegations this summer.

149
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:42,640
Speaker 3: Oh I'm welcoming the allegations, honey, but I'd be in

150
00:06:42,680 --> 00:06:44,680
Speaker 3: the gym squatting My butt is all natural?

151
00:06:44,760 --> 00:06:45,039
Speaker 2: Yes?

152
00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:46,480
Speaker 3: Can you can you confirm that?

153
00:06:46,680 --> 00:06:49,520
Speaker 2: Confirm that all the jiggle there's.

154
00:06:51,279 --> 00:06:54,760
Speaker 3: You know, it's varied in sizes over time, that it's

155
00:06:54,839 --> 00:06:57,920
Speaker 3: varied in proportion, you know, small it is getting a

156
00:06:57,920 --> 00:07:00,279
Speaker 3: little smaller and tighter since I've been you know, on

157
00:07:00,360 --> 00:07:03,960
Speaker 3: my health every now and again.

158
00:07:04,360 --> 00:07:16,040
Speaker 9: That's like my little treat.

159
00:07:16,200 --> 00:07:18,360
Speaker 3: But I did hear that bbls have some women have

160
00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:27,600
Speaker 3: a stench? Is that true?

161
00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:28,800
Speaker 5: More bbs than I had.

162
00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:32,160
Speaker 3: But I have heard, I've heard that there's a thing

163
00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:34,040
Speaker 3: now where you can tell some women who have had

164
00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:36,040
Speaker 3: baby there's like a smell that some men have said

165
00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:38,120
Speaker 3: that they've experienced that, but only with women who have

166
00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:40,800
Speaker 3: had bb Again, not everybody would a b BL, but

167
00:07:40,840 --> 00:07:43,960
Speaker 3: I have heard that's the thing.

168
00:07:42,320 --> 00:07:45,760
Speaker 1: I think, Yeah, if you have a c BL, I

169
00:07:45,760 --> 00:07:48,880
Speaker 1: think you need it. But theay, honestly, yeah, if you're

170
00:07:48,880 --> 00:07:52,520
Speaker 1: not used to wiping and you don't know. Yeah, I

171
00:07:52,560 --> 00:07:54,040
Speaker 1: do have an that.

172
00:07:54,160 --> 00:07:56,560
Speaker 6: I want to preface this by saying the views of

173
00:07:56,600 --> 00:08:00,640
Speaker 6: Triple Art do not reflect of everybody on this podcast.

174
00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:04,800
Speaker 6: I would say, you can't be transphobic if you have

175
00:08:04,840 --> 00:08:08,120
Speaker 6: a BBL. Now that is the deal breaker. Transphobia if

176
00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:10,400
Speaker 6: you have a BBL is a dear deal breaker because

177
00:08:10,480 --> 00:08:14,960
Speaker 6: a BBL is gender affirming care and the first women

178
00:08:14,960 --> 00:08:17,800
Speaker 6: to get them, damn bbl's was the trans girls. So

179
00:08:17,920 --> 00:08:21,560
Speaker 6: you out here trying to look like a doll being transphobic.

180
00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:24,760
Speaker 7: That don't make no sense. Babe. Mm that's my op.

181
00:08:24,840 --> 00:08:27,080
Speaker 1: So you can't be transphobic if you get a BBL,

182
00:08:27,400 --> 00:08:29,680
Speaker 1: you cannot. You heard it from Triple guys.

183
00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:31,760
Speaker 2: What's the last we got next?

184
00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:32,360
Speaker 3: For our second?

185
00:08:33,280 --> 00:08:36,320
Speaker 6: Well, I didn't officially have an O no op, but

186
00:08:36,360 --> 00:08:38,960
Speaker 6: since we're talking about blackisms and we started out talking

187
00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:43,800
Speaker 6: about bathing, I used to date uh Caribbean girl and

188
00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:46,040
Speaker 6: she always watched her underwear in the shower.

189
00:08:46,280 --> 00:08:48,000
Speaker 7: Yes, y'all do that? Everybody?

190
00:08:48,280 --> 00:08:48,480
Speaker 2: Yeah?

191
00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:52,000
Speaker 3: That is to do?

192
00:08:52,440 --> 00:08:52,560
Speaker 2: So?

193
00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:54,719
Speaker 7: Is it is it a he the no ap?

194
00:08:54,840 --> 00:08:56,880
Speaker 6: Do you think that a girl who does not watch

195
00:08:56,880 --> 00:08:59,000
Speaker 6: her draws in a shower is filthy.

196
00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:02,959
Speaker 8: No, I don't think she's filthy, but I do think

197
00:09:03,040 --> 00:09:07,280
Speaker 8: that I do see where Caribbean women prioritize that sort

198
00:09:07,320 --> 00:09:10,280
Speaker 8: of claiming that it's like, you can't be washing your

199
00:09:10,360 --> 00:09:13,400
Speaker 8: underwear with the rest of the clothes, so that's why

200
00:09:13,480 --> 00:09:16,040
Speaker 8: it's washed separately, and it's washed as soon as I

201
00:09:16,080 --> 00:09:16,640
Speaker 8: take it off.

202
00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:20,840
Speaker 3: It's like a thing with like having dirty drawers laying

203
00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:24,080
Speaker 3: around co mingling with other clothing and then also just

204
00:09:24,120 --> 00:09:27,840
Speaker 3: having whatever remnants from your underwear sitting. Yeah, it's like

205
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:30,080
Speaker 3: maybe you take it off.

206
00:09:30,400 --> 00:09:32,400
Speaker 2: Wash and that's not a curby thing. My mom will wash.

207
00:09:32,440 --> 00:09:34,480
Speaker 1: Like sometimes you go in the bathroom and you see draws.

208
00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:37,080
Speaker 1: I'm like, well, my mom, god draws. But now I

209
00:09:37,200 --> 00:09:40,680
Speaker 1: understand it because yeah, because now I have a wife,

210
00:09:40,720 --> 00:09:43,000
Speaker 1: I understand. Like Kay will get underwear and.

211
00:09:42,920 --> 00:09:44,240
Speaker 2: She was like, I have to wash these before I

212
00:09:44,280 --> 00:09:47,600
Speaker 2: try them on. Well, yeah, I just well I get it.

213
00:09:47,640 --> 00:09:50,680
Speaker 1: Now your badge is open for men. We don't even

214
00:09:50,679 --> 00:09:53,280
Speaker 1: be thinking about that. So that is like a black

215
00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:55,400
Speaker 1: mom thing too, because my mom used to do that too.

216
00:09:55,400 --> 00:09:56,640
Speaker 1: She used to watch it in the bathroom.

217
00:09:56,640 --> 00:09:58,040
Speaker 3: I will say now that I have my own washing

218
00:09:58,120 --> 00:10:00,120
Speaker 3: machine though, and we wash our own clothes together for

219
00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:01,880
Speaker 3: the you know, I will wash my club my under

220
00:10:01,920 --> 00:10:05,040
Speaker 3: her in the washing machine. Now maybe that's the Americanized

221
00:10:05,080 --> 00:10:07,160
Speaker 3: version of me, but I definitely was talked by my

222
00:10:07,160 --> 00:10:10,000
Speaker 3: grandmother and my mother to wash my underwear inside. My

223
00:10:10,040 --> 00:10:12,120
Speaker 3: aunts still do it to this day. It's just like

224
00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:13,839
Speaker 3: part of you know, second nature.

225
00:10:13,920 --> 00:10:15,720
Speaker 7: So you wash them in the shower and then you

226
00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:16,760
Speaker 7: wash them in the washer.

227
00:10:16,640 --> 00:10:18,319
Speaker 3: Or you just wash them, just watch them in the shower.

228
00:10:18,640 --> 00:10:21,719
Speaker 1: They hang them to try, because most most underweard the

229
00:10:21,760 --> 00:10:24,480
Speaker 1: garments are delicated. You can't put in and dry. I

230
00:10:24,559 --> 00:10:27,959
Speaker 1: learned this living with so and when I used to

231
00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:31,400
Speaker 1: do my parents clothes, like they would be very clear

232
00:10:31,400 --> 00:10:34,360
Speaker 1: with you, like, do not dry these things, hang these up,

233
00:10:34,360 --> 00:10:34,720
Speaker 1: And I'm like, I.

234
00:10:34,720 --> 00:10:36,040
Speaker 2: Don't want to hang up no underwear.

235
00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:39,360
Speaker 3: Man. My grandmother, bless her heart, she washed her underwear

236
00:10:39,400 --> 00:10:40,920
Speaker 3: till the very end, honey. And they were about this

237
00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:43,640
Speaker 3: big amen. It was I was like, is this a pillowcase?

238
00:10:44,760 --> 00:10:49,520
Speaker 3: His grandma's draws? Okay? And she would say, man, baggy them.

239
00:10:49,920 --> 00:10:52,240
Speaker 3: She would put those and hang them to try.

240
00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:55,199
Speaker 2: So I didn't mind hanging yours. Your drawers was like this,

241
00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:01,959
Speaker 2: like all right, babe, I just I'll just hang this up.

242
00:11:02,440 --> 00:11:06,080
Speaker 2: Put this right over here, y'all draw.

243
00:11:07,920 --> 00:11:10,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, they've definitely gotten to be very minimal.

244
00:11:10,559 --> 00:11:12,360
Speaker 1: Only let me ask you a question to all my

245
00:11:12,400 --> 00:11:17,839
Speaker 1: Caribbean massive. Did the women in y'all life inspect y'all

246
00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:18,640
Speaker 1: where y'all came out the.

247
00:11:18,640 --> 00:11:22,960
Speaker 8: Shower my sister did. She didn't do it regularly, probably

248
00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:25,160
Speaker 8: once or twice. I did the same thing as you.

249
00:11:25,240 --> 00:11:27,560
Speaker 8: I went to the back after coming from out side alackism.

250
00:11:27,679 --> 00:11:29,520
Speaker 8: She sends me to the bathroom to go bathe because

251
00:11:29,520 --> 00:11:31,320
Speaker 8: I'm dirty. I go in the bathroo. I'm like, man,

252
00:11:31,360 --> 00:11:33,360
Speaker 8: I want to I want to shower, and I just

253
00:11:33,400 --> 00:11:35,240
Speaker 8: go in there. I turn the water on. I stand

254
00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:37,200
Speaker 8: there and I think I'm slick, and I stand there

255
00:11:37,200 --> 00:11:39,160
Speaker 8: for a good time. I'm thinking it's a good amount

256
00:11:39,120 --> 00:11:41,600
Speaker 8: of it's probably like really like five minutes, but I'm

257
00:11:41,640 --> 00:11:43,680
Speaker 8: thinking it's like ten because I ain't really doing nothing

258
00:11:43,720 --> 00:11:44,520
Speaker 8: on my cell phone.

259
00:11:44,559 --> 00:11:45,360
Speaker 2: I got an iPad.

260
00:11:45,520 --> 00:11:46,559
Speaker 5: I'm just standing there.

261
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:49,680
Speaker 1: Like just being dumb dirty.

262
00:11:51,720 --> 00:11:54,439
Speaker 8: Honestly, think I went as far as like throwing water

263
00:11:54,559 --> 00:11:55,200
Speaker 8: all myself.

264
00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:58,680
Speaker 2: I've done that, like like you get the water. You're like,

265
00:11:59,080 --> 00:12:02,040
Speaker 2: he did everything but wash up. Right, you waste all

266
00:12:02,040 --> 00:12:02,400
Speaker 2: that time.

267
00:12:02,440 --> 00:12:05,080
Speaker 8: And I remember this thing me coming out the shower

268
00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:08,480
Speaker 8: and we got to walk past. We walk from the

269
00:12:08,480 --> 00:12:12,440
Speaker 8: bathroom through the living room to the bedroom and my

270
00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:14,600
Speaker 8: sister's on the couch and she's watching TV. She looks

271
00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:17,280
Speaker 8: at me and she gets up. I'm like, what the heck, man,

272
00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:21,400
Speaker 8: and she like, you'll be it? And I'm like, yes,

273
00:12:21,520 --> 00:12:24,280
Speaker 8: I made What's what's the problem. She's like, no, you didn't.

274
00:12:24,440 --> 00:12:26,880
Speaker 8: You did not be it. And then she like took

275
00:12:27,280 --> 00:12:30,360
Speaker 8: my my my child that was wrapped around my waist

276
00:12:30,840 --> 00:12:34,040
Speaker 8: and she took it and she dragged it on my skin.

277
00:12:34,440 --> 00:12:43,439
Speaker 5: And nothing but charcoal. First off, I didn't know that.

278
00:12:43,720 --> 00:12:44,560
Speaker 5: I didn't know you could do that.

279
00:12:45,160 --> 00:12:49,439
Speaker 2: I didn't know it was like dirt. I was gonna say.

280
00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:51,319
Speaker 10: When I stopped doing that is when I realized, after

281
00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:53,360
Speaker 10: one day of doing that nonsense, I'm taking I actually

282
00:12:53,360 --> 00:12:55,040
Speaker 10: did take a full shot and I looked down at

283
00:12:55,080 --> 00:12:55,760
Speaker 10: the water was like.

284
00:12:56,440 --> 00:12:58,600
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yes.

285
00:12:58,679 --> 00:13:01,040
Speaker 8: And that's the thing we realized as like I didn't

286
00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:03,360
Speaker 8: like you. See as a killer, it doesn't happen anymore.

287
00:13:03,400 --> 00:13:07,840
Speaker 8: But as a kid when was outside all day, get

288
00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:09,280
Speaker 8: and you take a shower in.

289
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:10,200
Speaker 5: The tub.

290
00:13:12,160 --> 00:13:14,200
Speaker 2: And washed the showers.

291
00:13:14,400 --> 00:13:16,760
Speaker 3: Oh my god, Devove, do you remember when we went

292
00:13:16,800 --> 00:13:19,240
Speaker 3: on a couple trips. This is when we were back

293
00:13:19,280 --> 00:13:24,160
Speaker 3: in college, right, so we were staying at like then.

294
00:13:24,679 --> 00:13:28,800
Speaker 3: But the line, the light, the light that lit up

295
00:13:29,160 --> 00:13:32,760
Speaker 3: Ramatta in just it was going so it was the

296
00:13:32,880 --> 00:13:35,840
Speaker 3: ram So that's that's how far back it was.

297
00:13:35,920 --> 00:13:36,040
Speaker 2: Right.

298
00:13:36,080 --> 00:13:38,280
Speaker 3: We scraped together our low coins to go on this

299
00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:43,480
Speaker 3: trip with another couple and we yep, exactly and we

300
00:13:43,600 --> 00:13:47,800
Speaker 3: had one room right, double beds.

301
00:13:47,920 --> 00:13:48,319
Speaker 2: Okay.

302
00:13:49,720 --> 00:13:51,880
Speaker 3: They went to take a shower before us, and it

303
00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:53,520
Speaker 3: was like, yo, yeah, go ahead, go ahead, because this

304
00:13:53,559 --> 00:13:56,600
Speaker 3: was like an intransit stop. We were staying there long.

305
00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:58,720
Speaker 2: You never tell somebody to go to this yo before

306
00:13:58,760 --> 00:13:59,360
Speaker 2: you grow.

307
00:14:00,280 --> 00:14:02,559
Speaker 3: Do you remember what that tub looked like when the

308
00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:03,719
Speaker 3: two of them came out of it.

309
00:14:03,920 --> 00:14:07,280
Speaker 1: I remember seeing the wash class afterwards because it was

310
00:14:07,320 --> 00:14:08,240
Speaker 1: white wash cloths.

311
00:14:08,240 --> 00:14:09,640
Speaker 2: We in the whole town.

312
00:14:09,440 --> 00:14:11,360
Speaker 5: In the washing was great.

313
00:14:11,480 --> 00:14:12,760
Speaker 3: They were grey, y'all.

314
00:14:13,040 --> 00:14:14,000
Speaker 2: And me and Kate walked in.

315
00:14:13,960 --> 00:14:18,360
Speaker 3: It and I was like, I looked down and it

316
00:14:18,520 --> 00:14:21,240
Speaker 3: was like the film and the ring. I said, what

317
00:14:21,280 --> 00:14:24,360
Speaker 3: the fuck did they have one? Did they peel off

318
00:14:25,040 --> 00:14:28,320
Speaker 3: a couple of layers of skin? It was so.

319
00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:29,160
Speaker 5: Bad I'll tell you what though.

320
00:14:29,200 --> 00:14:32,760
Speaker 2: You know they was clean now right now.

321
00:14:32,880 --> 00:14:35,080
Speaker 7: After y'all had drove hours.

322
00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:38,040
Speaker 5: In a car in a car and was outside doing that, it.

323
00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:40,240
Speaker 3: Looked like they stopped dropping rolled from New York.

324
00:14:40,040 --> 00:14:42,760
Speaker 2: To Virginia outside all day.

325
00:14:44,480 --> 00:14:46,880
Speaker 3: It's just like a quick little trip we traveled. It

326
00:14:46,960 --> 00:14:48,560
Speaker 3: was a travel and a quick pitstop.

327
00:14:48,680 --> 00:14:51,200
Speaker 1: This couple in particular, we we all grew up together,

328
00:14:51,440 --> 00:14:55,120
Speaker 1: and he, for example, like he would stay at my house,

329
00:14:55,160 --> 00:14:57,360
Speaker 1: me and my brother and we'd be playing video games

330
00:14:57,440 --> 00:14:59,840
Speaker 1: until like three four in the morning, and then the

331
00:15:00,040 --> 00:15:02,200
Speaker 1: son to be coming up and it's like seven, he's like, yo,

332
00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:03,480
Speaker 1: I got to get to work. And he would just

333
00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:07,680
Speaker 1: leave and just go to work. And we'd be like, yo,

334
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:11,600
Speaker 1: he ain't brush the TV. He just got up and

335
00:15:11,640 --> 00:15:13,680
Speaker 1: went to work. So I think what we saw was

336
00:15:13,680 --> 00:15:16,080
Speaker 1: the remnants of a couple of days, because I'm pretty

337
00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:17,800
Speaker 1: sure if he did that with us, that was like

338
00:15:17,840 --> 00:15:19,520
Speaker 1: a normal thing for him.

339
00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:22,760
Speaker 3: And I was just like you at that point, and

340
00:15:22,840 --> 00:15:25,520
Speaker 3: I were like, yeah, we might have to have to

341
00:15:25,560 --> 00:15:28,880
Speaker 3: overdraft this account and get another room because.

342
00:15:28,640 --> 00:15:33,480
Speaker 2: We didn't go in that shower. I called my pops, like, yo,

343
00:15:34,080 --> 00:15:35,840
Speaker 2: that's that's the good thing. About having father. I would say,

344
00:15:36,120 --> 00:15:38,240
Speaker 2: school man, I'm away. We got to get our room.

345
00:15:38,920 --> 00:15:39,600
Speaker 2: How much is a room?

346
00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:42,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was like gotta put in your account and

347
00:15:42,840 --> 00:15:45,760
Speaker 1: we just got a separate room.

348
00:15:46,080 --> 00:15:47,880
Speaker 3: Real quick, Starry Tripper, before you go. I just want

349
00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:50,480
Speaker 3: to after Josh told his story, when y'all be in

350
00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:53,000
Speaker 3: the shower or in the bathroom and the shower is

351
00:15:53,080 --> 00:15:56,120
Speaker 3: running for that five minutes, what I typically hear is

352
00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:58,360
Speaker 3: that boys don't want to stop what they're doing to shower.

353
00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:00,400
Speaker 3: You're already standing in the bathroom.

354
00:16:00,440 --> 00:16:02,960
Speaker 5: Don't make why not just logic.

355
00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:05,840
Speaker 2: There's no logic. We don't know, we don't know. Show

356
00:16:06,440 --> 00:16:07,240
Speaker 2: you were doing.

357
00:16:07,280 --> 00:16:11,120
Speaker 8: It ain't work after work to do all this dry

358
00:16:11,280 --> 00:16:12,880
Speaker 8: off and I ain't trying do all that.

359
00:16:12,920 --> 00:16:13,120
Speaker 4: Man.

360
00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:15,600
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you what it was for me. This

361
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:18,520
Speaker 1: was the only control I had on my life. When

362
00:16:18,520 --> 00:16:20,280
Speaker 1: you were a kid, they tell you to do something

363
00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:21,280
Speaker 1: every minute of the day.

364
00:16:21,320 --> 00:16:21,560
Speaker 2: Fuck it.

365
00:16:21,600 --> 00:16:24,080
Speaker 1: I'm in the bathroom not doing nothing untill they come

366
00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:25,640
Speaker 1: in there and they tell you got to do that too.

367
00:16:25,720 --> 00:16:26,560
Speaker 2: Now, you were there.

368
00:16:28,280 --> 00:16:32,320
Speaker 1: Because I got from early. I always always, man. I

369
00:16:32,320 --> 00:16:34,200
Speaker 1: got my ass with for not washing up one time,

370
00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:36,560
Speaker 1: my auntie for lying.

371
00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:39,760
Speaker 2: I took a shower. Swear I took a shower.

372
00:16:40,280 --> 00:16:42,160
Speaker 1: And this is the only reason why I started going

373
00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:44,680
Speaker 1: in to turn the water on was because I went

374
00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:46,800
Speaker 1: in there one time by myself, and I didn't even

375
00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:47,520
Speaker 1: turn the water on.

376
00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:50,280
Speaker 2: I just went I was young, I was little.

377
00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:50,960
Speaker 5: You didn't care.

378
00:16:51,200 --> 00:16:51,280
Speaker 2: No.

379
00:16:51,360 --> 00:16:53,280
Speaker 1: I just went in the bathroom, went in there, closed

380
00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:56,760
Speaker 1: the door, walk right back out, and you thought you

381
00:16:56,800 --> 00:16:59,080
Speaker 1: were the smartest. I did, I swear I did. She

382
00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:02,800
Speaker 1: was just like you washed up. Yes, don't lie to me.

383
00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:05,040
Speaker 2: It's just like that too, Yes I did. I didn't.

384
00:17:05,119 --> 00:17:07,439
Speaker 2: I did, Auntie, I did. Why you don't believe me?

385
00:17:07,840 --> 00:17:09,639
Speaker 1: And she goes into the bathroom and she goes too

386
00:17:09,640 --> 00:17:13,080
Speaker 1: the thing and it's and I'm just looking at it

387
00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:14,120
Speaker 1: like I.

388
00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:16,879
Speaker 2: Swell washed up. I don't know what happened. And because

389
00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:20,479
Speaker 2: I kept lying, I got wood. You deserved it, brod.

390
00:17:24,320 --> 00:17:27,080
Speaker 3: Jack And it's like it's like generation to generation. Jackson

391
00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:28,880
Speaker 3: did the same thing to my mom, and my mom

392
00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:31,119
Speaker 3: just laughed it off. Kas will go in there and

393
00:17:31,160 --> 00:17:33,320
Speaker 3: shower and not wash his face, like wash every other

394
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:35,560
Speaker 3: part of his body, but his face. Face came out

395
00:17:35,560 --> 00:17:38,439
Speaker 3: one time looking super dry. Catch your remnants on the

396
00:17:38,480 --> 00:17:42,360
Speaker 3: side of his cheek as you wash your face? Yes, Caz,

397
00:17:42,400 --> 00:17:43,240
Speaker 3: did you wash your face?

398
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:43,600
Speaker 2: Uh?

399
00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:44,680
Speaker 7: Huh what?

400
00:17:44,840 --> 00:17:48,200
Speaker 3: It licked his forehead. He was like, say you salty,

401
00:17:48,680 --> 00:17:51,920
Speaker 3: go wash your face. That's the telltale sign. And only

402
00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:56,880
Speaker 3: mother could do some ship like that is lick your forehead. Yes,

403
00:17:58,600 --> 00:18:00,679
Speaker 3: And every morning before they leave for school, I have

404
00:18:00,720 --> 00:18:02,879
Speaker 3: a tub of A and D ointment. I got Q

405
00:18:03,080 --> 00:18:05,920
Speaker 3: tips for buggers. I got to make sure the hair

406
00:18:06,080 --> 00:18:10,879
Speaker 3: is good. We're always cleaning airs, clipping fingernails like all that.

407
00:18:12,359 --> 00:18:13,880
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm, any of yours?

408
00:18:14,400 --> 00:18:16,359
Speaker 7: Yeah, absolutely, my aunt.

409
00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:18,400
Speaker 2: I'm like, come.

410
00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:21,200
Speaker 5: On, I do that now, bro you do yes?

411
00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:23,840
Speaker 8: If we If we at the school door and I'm

412
00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:25,480
Speaker 8: doing my last checks and I look at you and

413
00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:26,200
Speaker 8: you ain't got nothing.

414
00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:28,240
Speaker 2: I ain't got nothing on me? What was it do

415
00:18:28,320 --> 00:18:30,360
Speaker 2: make you go in to asho get this?

416
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:35,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's another thing. I'm all up in these kids' mouths.

417
00:18:36,480 --> 00:18:37,960
Speaker 3: I want to see your tongue, I want to smell

418
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:39,240
Speaker 3: your broath. I'm gonna do the same thing.

419
00:18:41,560 --> 00:18:42,360
Speaker 7: My whole day.

420
00:18:42,480 --> 00:18:44,320
Speaker 6: We used to be waiting in the line to get

421
00:18:44,359 --> 00:18:47,040
Speaker 6: dropped off at school and my mom out of nowhere,

422
00:18:47,240 --> 00:18:49,159
Speaker 6: like your breaths, thinks.

423
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:56,879
Speaker 3: Like absolutely, but think about it. You know in your mind,

424
00:18:57,880 --> 00:19:01,560
Speaker 3: everybody that you've probably encountered, whether it true childhood or adulthood,

425
00:19:01,560 --> 00:19:04,760
Speaker 3: who breaths. Think you know them people by first and

426
00:19:04,880 --> 00:19:08,119
Speaker 3: last name. They breathsteak. So you don't want to be

427
00:19:08,160 --> 00:19:10,320
Speaker 3: that person who in the mind like people.

428
00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:12,760
Speaker 7: That's what my mom used to say.

429
00:19:13,320 --> 00:19:15,480
Speaker 6: I used to be like like I said, well better

430
00:19:15,520 --> 00:19:18,360
Speaker 6: than I said it than somebody that they're gonna.

431
00:19:18,119 --> 00:19:21,240
Speaker 5: Talk about it till this day that's gonna happen.

432
00:19:21,800 --> 00:19:24,919
Speaker 1: Okay, I got another blackism for y'all. Well, you always

433
00:19:24,920 --> 00:19:27,640
Speaker 1: had got good reports in school. I'm not asking you trouble.

434
00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:30,320
Speaker 1: I know you got bad reports in school. I did too.

435
00:19:31,119 --> 00:19:34,679
Speaker 2: What do you don't? Please don't put my trauma night

436
00:19:34,760 --> 00:19:37,240
Speaker 2: is the worst night in my life from first grade

437
00:19:37,240 --> 00:19:39,680
Speaker 2: to school graduate. So let me ask a question.

438
00:19:39,840 --> 00:19:42,600
Speaker 1: Is it a blackism that report card of open school

439
00:19:42,720 --> 00:19:45,520
Speaker 1: night is like like traumatic for me?

440
00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:49,040
Speaker 2: For us because it depends a counterparts.

441
00:19:49,359 --> 00:19:52,000
Speaker 1: Well, I won't say just a black black thing, because

442
00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:55,840
Speaker 1: my Asian friends had it like me like they Pan.

443
00:19:59,280 --> 00:20:00,000
Speaker 7: Indian family.

444
00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:02,080
Speaker 1: Least my Indian friends, Oh god, they be in there

445
00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:08,200
Speaker 1: my white friends just like I swear my boy, my boy,

446
00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:12,119
Speaker 1: my boy mark He's the first person I seen cursing

447
00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:15,280
Speaker 1: his mom. White boy Mark. He was fat, He's on

448
00:20:15,359 --> 00:20:18,040
Speaker 1: his bike and he's always out in kanasis doing whatever

449
00:20:18,080 --> 00:20:21,080
Speaker 1: he wants, and she'd be screaming, I'm Marked coming for dinner.

450
00:20:21,160 --> 00:20:22,400
Speaker 3: I'm not fucking great.

451
00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:24,720
Speaker 5: He was like, what what do?

452
00:20:24,760 --> 00:20:28,159
Speaker 7: He said, fuck you mom, bitch, you bit you ho

453
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:31,040
Speaker 7: you bitch? You the bitch you say?

454
00:20:31,119 --> 00:20:31,320
Speaker 3: Oh.

455
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:34,800
Speaker 1: He never called his mama bitch, but he did say

456
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:38,000
Speaker 1: fuck you, mam, and she she the fuck you Mark.

457
00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:42,600
Speaker 2: Going back, I thought, I thought about it.

458
00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:47,120
Speaker 1: I thought about crazy.

459
00:20:47,800 --> 00:20:48,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, I did.

460
00:20:48,440 --> 00:20:48,840
Speaker 7: I'm gonna.

461
00:20:48,920 --> 00:20:51,240
Speaker 1: I thought about disobeying my mom one time, but I

462
00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:53,440
Speaker 1: never in my life thought about cursing at my mom.

463
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:56,080
Speaker 2: But she told me one time to clean up my

464
00:20:56,200 --> 00:20:57,720
Speaker 2: room Saturday. Saturday.

465
00:20:57,760 --> 00:21:00,400
Speaker 1: I went outside to me being defied. This our first

466
00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:02,919
Speaker 1: time were living in Come. See, I'm outside with my

467
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:06,320
Speaker 1: friends half and I'm black but I'm white. What I'm saying, Wow,

468
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:08,040
Speaker 1: this is me?

469
00:21:09,520 --> 00:21:14,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, excuse me? Yes? Did you clean this room? Like

470
00:21:14,119 --> 00:21:18,760
Speaker 2: I said, looked at my friends, it's my room. What

471
00:21:18,920 --> 00:21:22,000
Speaker 2: I'm coming. That's exactly how it happened.

472
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:24,359
Speaker 1: Bro, I swear I thought about it, and in a

473
00:21:24,400 --> 00:21:27,320
Speaker 1: minute I said this my room, and she said, I

474
00:21:27,400 --> 00:21:31,320
Speaker 1: knew I friend cleaned all that ship.

475
00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:33,679
Speaker 8: If you got a second guest, asking your mom's like

476
00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:34,840
Speaker 8: talking back to your moms.

477
00:21:34,840 --> 00:21:36,240
Speaker 2: You you shouldn't have done it the first place.

478
00:21:36,720 --> 00:21:37,680
Speaker 5: That part, I don't.

479
00:21:37,760 --> 00:21:40,200
Speaker 2: I don't play with Karen Karen. I don't play with Karen,

480
00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:42,800
Speaker 2: but I'd rather play with Troy before I play with

481
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:47,919
Speaker 2: Karen Troy. Would you know? Like what my mother not

482
00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:48,720
Speaker 2: saying nothing?

483
00:21:49,280 --> 00:21:51,600
Speaker 1: The minute she looks she's looking at you and she going,

484
00:21:51,720 --> 00:21:55,320
Speaker 1: this is the tight face, and then it's ye.

485
00:22:02,359 --> 00:22:05,440
Speaker 2: My mother will slap you. And he's five to one.

486
00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:08,600
Speaker 1: So the other thing to say was to come to

487
00:22:08,680 --> 00:22:10,439
Speaker 1: us and then be like, don't look down at me.

488
00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:14,800
Speaker 2: What am I supposed to do? Box your teeth on

489
00:22:14,840 --> 00:22:16,600
Speaker 2: your cheek? Did stand at the stairs?

490
00:22:16,880 --> 00:22:20,040
Speaker 3: Your throat? I got that so many times? Is that

491
00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:23,080
Speaker 3: a Jamaican is a absolutely don't suck?

492
00:22:24,200 --> 00:22:30,880
Speaker 5: Absolutely what what? What? What you're gonna? I'm not I'm

493
00:22:30,880 --> 00:22:33,639
Speaker 5: not even flexing on you right right flexing. I'm just

494
00:22:35,119 --> 00:22:36,320
Speaker 5: watch you think.

495
00:22:36,160 --> 00:22:42,600
Speaker 6: About Yeah, that's the black mom is because my mom

496
00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:45,240
Speaker 6: used to say that ship, bro, don't hit me, you

497
00:22:45,280 --> 00:22:47,240
Speaker 6: want to hit me, I'm like I.

498
00:22:47,320 --> 00:22:53,480
Speaker 5: Am don't no, don't block that block disrespectful is.

499
00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:53,919
Speaker 2: Coming at you.

500
00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:54,520
Speaker 7: You're just like.

501
00:22:57,359 --> 00:22:59,160
Speaker 10: That happened to me one time I blocked my mother.

502
00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:01,399
Speaker 10: She tried to hit me high school and she swung

503
00:23:01,560 --> 00:23:04,199
Speaker 10: and she hit the cheer. Came home from school, my

504
00:23:04,240 --> 00:23:06,919
Speaker 10: mother had a brace on her finger. To you, you

505
00:23:07,040 --> 00:23:08,280
Speaker 10: caused me to break my finger.

506
00:23:09,160 --> 00:23:13,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, I knowed hit that. You trying to hit me.

507
00:23:13,920 --> 00:23:14,800
Speaker 2: You did cause it though.

508
00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:21,080
Speaker 1: You probably watch my grandmother, my grandmother Nana love her.

509
00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:24,040
Speaker 1: If you ever tried to block a movie was disrespectful

510
00:23:24,560 --> 00:23:26,439
Speaker 1: and if you ever tried to move or block her.

511
00:23:26,480 --> 00:23:30,639
Speaker 2: First thing to say, what you you're trying to hit me? No,

512
00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:33,440
Speaker 2: I'm trying not to get it. He trying to hit me, trying.

513
00:23:34,520 --> 00:23:38,560
Speaker 5: I'm now here comes my big army ground.

514
00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:42,040
Speaker 2: He's trying to hit your grandpa. I'm not gonna hear it.

515
00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:45,280
Speaker 2: And he don't even want to hit you.

516
00:23:46,040 --> 00:23:49,760
Speaker 8: He just know he better do it or he gonna

517
00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:50,240
Speaker 8: get hit too.

518
00:23:50,720 --> 00:23:52,920
Speaker 1: My grandfathers didn't want to hit us so bad. What

519
00:23:53,080 --> 00:23:54,640
Speaker 1: she would call us, just how he would hit us.

520
00:23:55,640 --> 00:23:57,280
Speaker 1: He'd be holding us and this would be the belt.

521
00:23:57,320 --> 00:24:00,919
Speaker 1: He'd be going like this. Did not tell you, and

522
00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:02,560
Speaker 1: we started to get hit to it. So the minute

523
00:24:02,560 --> 00:24:06,960
Speaker 1: we got like he don't want to do this, and then.

524
00:24:06,880 --> 00:24:08,160
Speaker 2: Be able to leave the room, he's like.

525
00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:17,280
Speaker 11: Okay, my grandfather used to look out for here's another

526
00:24:17,320 --> 00:24:20,440
Speaker 11: blacks with corporal punishment.

527
00:24:21,119 --> 00:24:22,960
Speaker 5: Uh, go grab the belt.

528
00:24:24,960 --> 00:24:28,120
Speaker 7: Don't pick a switch to make us go pick our

529
00:24:28,160 --> 00:24:28,800
Speaker 7: own switch.

530
00:24:29,560 --> 00:24:32,440
Speaker 3: That was really a thing, the belt thing I got.

531
00:24:32,760 --> 00:24:34,600
Speaker 3: I never got beat as a kid because I was good.

532
00:24:35,080 --> 00:24:36,719
Speaker 8: My wife tells me she used to go pick her

533
00:24:36,760 --> 00:24:39,280
Speaker 8: switch from outside and her mom used to call a lollipop,

534
00:24:39,880 --> 00:24:40,280
Speaker 8: so she was.

535
00:24:40,280 --> 00:24:44,680
Speaker 5: Playing psychological game, get lollipop, you know what I mean.

536
00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:47,160
Speaker 8: Pap used to tell me to go get the belt,

537
00:24:47,160 --> 00:24:49,680
Speaker 8: and we had like a place where we had all

538
00:24:49,680 --> 00:24:52,760
Speaker 8: the belts were my father And then you go get

539
00:24:53,040 --> 00:24:54,080
Speaker 8: the smaller belt.

540
00:24:54,440 --> 00:24:57,400
Speaker 2: Try again, try again, my friend, that is the blackest

541
00:24:57,400 --> 00:24:58,159
Speaker 2: thing about.

542
00:24:57,920 --> 00:25:01,160
Speaker 10: The one he wanted in his back pocket, the belt.

543
00:25:01,359 --> 00:25:06,680
Speaker 8: Yeah, you go pick the wrong one.

544
00:25:06,760 --> 00:25:07,919
Speaker 2: So I'm gonna show you a lesson.

545
00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:12,080
Speaker 8: Yeah that's fund did your dad's had the belt with

546
00:25:12,359 --> 00:25:16,880
Speaker 8: the thick belt that got has the belt holes all

547
00:25:16,920 --> 00:25:20,600
Speaker 8: through it.

548
00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:19,399
Speaker 7: To the end.

549
00:25:19,480 --> 00:25:21,840
Speaker 5: Yes, it gets more dynamic.

550
00:25:22,040 --> 00:25:24,200
Speaker 1: My father needed that because my father was about four

551
00:25:24,280 --> 00:25:27,040
Speaker 1: hundred pounds at one point and that only belt he had.

552
00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:29,320
Speaker 2: Was the belts always the end.

553
00:25:28,400 --> 00:25:31,320
Speaker 5: The worst dads get quality belt.

554
00:25:31,359 --> 00:25:32,240
Speaker 2: Sleep my belt.

555
00:25:32,520 --> 00:25:33,480
Speaker 5: My belts like they.

556
00:25:33,440 --> 00:25:34,359
Speaker 2: Bend and shape.

557
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:37,720
Speaker 3: Dad got the quality feather, the real leather.

558
00:25:40,119 --> 00:25:42,679
Speaker 6: These flip flops they was they had a white strap

559
00:25:42,760 --> 00:25:45,480
Speaker 6: over the top and they had like a tan soule

560
00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:49,280
Speaker 6: and it was leather. And that motherfucker had that good

561
00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:53,680
Speaker 6: bounce BACKO.

562
00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:54,920
Speaker 7: Got a heavy, heavy, thin song and.

563
00:25:55,080 --> 00:25:59,679
Speaker 3: Perfect and the wrist to Yeah, I'm saying, that's.

564
00:25:58,840 --> 00:26:01,879
Speaker 7: Take that motherfucker you.

565
00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:04,439
Speaker 3: Chocolate right, I'm like, damn American, did you guys have

566
00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:07,040
Speaker 3: this is? It's just saying that my mother would say

567
00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:07,720
Speaker 3: all the time.

568
00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:11,000
Speaker 2: If you lie, you will cheat.

569
00:26:11,680 --> 00:26:13,960
Speaker 3: If you cheat, you will steal.

570
00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:14,760
Speaker 9: If you.

571
00:26:16,720 --> 00:26:18,520
Speaker 2: Jail and don't call me.

572
00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:22,080
Speaker 1: I never got that, you know that I never got

573
00:26:22,080 --> 00:26:26,119
Speaker 1: my mother like sheat you still you still you go

574
00:26:26,160 --> 00:26:26,440
Speaker 1: to jail.

575
00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:28,840
Speaker 2: If you go to jail, don't call me nobody.

576
00:26:29,040 --> 00:26:30,600
Speaker 3: As simple as did you brus your teeth game before

577
00:26:30,600 --> 00:26:33,680
Speaker 3: we left the house and be like, yeah, I.

578
00:26:33,840 --> 00:26:35,760
Speaker 2: Kind of text me that, man, I I gotta use that.

579
00:26:35,960 --> 00:26:38,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, man, I was just jail before.

580
00:26:38,640 --> 00:26:40,679
Speaker 1: I've just never got I don't think I sived this.

581
00:26:40,920 --> 00:26:42,159
Speaker 1: I used to hear that, And I used to hear

582
00:26:42,160 --> 00:26:43,320
Speaker 1: this one all the time. I know, I used to

583
00:26:43,359 --> 00:26:46,359
Speaker 1: hear this one. You know, well, you're gonna call somebody

584
00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:49,320
Speaker 1: for me, fine, calling for me. I go to jail

585
00:26:49,359 --> 00:26:50,280
Speaker 1: and get some rest.

586
00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:56,919
Speaker 3: I'm like, what listen, Sharon and Karen, my mother used

587
00:26:56,920 --> 00:26:59,160
Speaker 3: to say that. Yeah, she was just like, call them,

588
00:26:59,200 --> 00:27:01,320
Speaker 3: call the police for me. Go ahead, go to jail.

589
00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:08,080
Speaker 2: I don't do this no more. I give up. Do

590
00:27:08,080 --> 00:27:09,680
Speaker 2: whatever you want to do. Y'all want to run the streets,

591
00:27:09,920 --> 00:27:12,520
Speaker 2: run the streets. But if you lie, you still, if

592
00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:15,199
Speaker 2: you're still, you go to jail. Don't call me. Okay,

593
00:27:15,320 --> 00:27:16,080
Speaker 2: if you think.

594
00:27:15,920 --> 00:27:17,639
Speaker 1: Someone else, your little friends do this, you think you

595
00:27:18,119 --> 00:27:20,440
Speaker 1: call them me, call the jail on me. I get

596
00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:23,639
Speaker 1: some rest, Okay, Troy, I'm done. Then she go upstairs

597
00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:25,960
Speaker 1: for five minutes, come back down and start screaming all

598
00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:28,680
Speaker 1: over me and my brothers be sitting.

599
00:27:28,520 --> 00:27:30,000
Speaker 3: There like that's the worst thing. They used to spend

600
00:27:30,040 --> 00:27:31,480
Speaker 3: the block. You feel like you heard what they had

601
00:27:31,520 --> 00:27:33,000
Speaker 3: to say, and then they go upstairs or they go

602
00:27:33,040 --> 00:27:36,479
Speaker 3: downstairs and you think, god damn, they shut up. They

603
00:27:36,520 --> 00:27:38,120
Speaker 3: come back up and they spend the block.

604
00:27:38,240 --> 00:27:41,000
Speaker 7: And another thing.

605
00:27:42,640 --> 00:27:46,040
Speaker 8: I used to avoid conversations. I used to avoid conversations

606
00:27:46,080 --> 00:27:47,440
Speaker 8: knowing I got in trouble. If I got in trouble

607
00:27:47,440 --> 00:27:50,000
Speaker 8: at school, and I know they called my parents do

608
00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:54,080
Speaker 8: that week like that that day, I go to bed

609
00:27:54,600 --> 00:27:57,480
Speaker 8: as soon as I come home from school. It's not

610
00:27:57,520 --> 00:28:00,000
Speaker 8: gonna work. But I just couldn't deal with I feel

611
00:28:00,119 --> 00:28:03,000
Speaker 8: trauma and anxiety that I have for the three hours

612
00:28:03,040 --> 00:28:04,280
Speaker 8: before my mom comes home.

613
00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:06,520
Speaker 6: Or if you were out and your mom promised you

614
00:28:06,560 --> 00:28:09,600
Speaker 6: ass whooping when you got home. I never took a

615
00:28:09,640 --> 00:28:12,920
Speaker 6: bath so fast in my pajamas, like good night. She

616
00:28:13,080 --> 00:28:17,959
Speaker 6: was like, hell, nine, get your ass that guy give

617
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:21,080
Speaker 6: you a whooping. No, only the boys got whipped, Like.

618
00:28:23,560 --> 00:28:25,360
Speaker 2: You want to give you something to cry for.

619
00:28:32,480 --> 00:28:33,240
Speaker 7: And that's the cry.

620
00:28:33,320 --> 00:28:37,680
Speaker 6: You can't even because I can't even fucking breathe right now.

621
00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:41,280
Speaker 2: Stream in this house tonight.

622
00:28:41,920 --> 00:28:42,920
Speaker 7: I don't know what.

623
00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:50,600
Speaker 2: Traumatic right now traumatic.

624
00:28:50,400 --> 00:28:51,200
Speaker 7: Just describing this.

625
00:28:51,320 --> 00:28:53,400
Speaker 6: I always think about how traumatic this is, and I

626
00:28:53,400 --> 00:28:56,880
Speaker 6: can't imagine myself hitting a kid. But I do think

627
00:28:57,240 --> 00:29:00,480
Speaker 6: some kids need the ass. Agree if they need a

628
00:29:00,480 --> 00:29:01,840
Speaker 6: whooping every day, I agree.

629
00:29:02,000 --> 00:29:03,800
Speaker 10: Going back to the school thing, I understood. I got

630
00:29:03,800 --> 00:29:05,720
Speaker 10: some of the beings they called from school one time.

631
00:29:05,720 --> 00:29:07,640
Speaker 10: I got in first and I turned off the answer machine,

632
00:29:07,680 --> 00:29:10,040
Speaker 10: thinking to lead the message. My father gets home late

633
00:29:10,120 --> 00:29:12,160
Speaker 10: round six, seven o'clock at night, but he's the first

634
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:14,320
Speaker 10: one to leave at six in the morning. There's answer

635
00:29:14,360 --> 00:29:17,240
Speaker 10: machine on. Before he leaves, there's a message blinking rest plate,

636
00:29:19,080 --> 00:29:21,880
Speaker 10: Matthew didn't have homework, and Matthew's talking in closet.

637
00:29:25,320 --> 00:29:28,680
Speaker 2: You this message from school yesterday? Why nobody here? That's

638
00:29:28,760 --> 00:29:36,040
Speaker 2: from oh that Joe was waiting for him in the morning.

639
00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:38,120
Speaker 2: So I got woken up in the morning with a nice.

640
00:29:39,520 --> 00:29:41,920
Speaker 5: You got a well rest your dad?

641
00:29:42,240 --> 00:29:43,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, man, he got.

642
00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:45,040
Speaker 3: All his exact way to start the day.

643
00:29:45,120 --> 00:29:46,360
Speaker 5: He's like ready to start the day.

644
00:29:46,640 --> 00:29:48,960
Speaker 2: But in hindsight, I deserve that. Of course you did.

645
00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:50,640
Speaker 2: You did that wrong.

646
00:29:50,680 --> 00:29:51,840
Speaker 5: And then trying to cover it up.

647
00:29:52,080 --> 00:29:53,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, the cover up the crime.

648
00:29:54,720 --> 00:29:57,960
Speaker 3: How do you guys cover up not taking out the

649
00:29:58,040 --> 00:29:59,800
Speaker 3: meat to the frost.

650
00:29:59,640 --> 00:30:01,680
Speaker 5: I just to take the meeting.

651
00:30:01,960 --> 00:30:04,680
Speaker 3: You can't cover that, and you forget to take the

652
00:30:04,720 --> 00:30:06,600
Speaker 3: meat out, and then she's all her way home and

653
00:30:06,600 --> 00:30:07,800
Speaker 3: the ship is not defrosted.

654
00:30:07,960 --> 00:30:09,720
Speaker 1: I got a running under the hot water as fast

655
00:30:09,720 --> 00:30:10,880
Speaker 1: as you can. But that's not gonna work.

656
00:30:11,200 --> 00:30:13,160
Speaker 10: It's not gonna work. We gonna work either. But shout

657
00:30:13,200 --> 00:30:16,360
Speaker 10: out to the girl I just saw post this online. Parents,

658
00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:18,040
Speaker 10: Why you ain't take it out before you went to work.

659
00:30:18,480 --> 00:30:20,800
Speaker 2: That's a good defraud.

660
00:30:21,000 --> 00:30:22,960
Speaker 7: You can't even defrost meet that fan?

661
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:23,320
Speaker 2: You can?

662
00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:23,960
Speaker 3: You can't.

663
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:28,080
Speaker 5: You you were relying your sustenance on a freaking ten

664
00:30:28,160 --> 00:30:28,480
Speaker 5: year old.

665
00:30:28,760 --> 00:30:29,480
Speaker 7: That's crazy.

666
00:30:29,800 --> 00:30:32,680
Speaker 2: You got bigger. Yes, Yes, that's what it is.

667
00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:35,080
Speaker 3: Yes, taking out the meat to defrost things.

668
00:30:35,080 --> 00:30:38,200
Speaker 1: I got one who had went to church, who had

669
00:30:38,240 --> 00:30:40,080
Speaker 1: to go to bed at different time on Saturday nights

670
00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:40,440
Speaker 1: because you.

671
00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:41,520
Speaker 2: Weren't allowed to sleep in church.

672
00:30:41,680 --> 00:30:46,800
Speaker 1: It was Friday night, Friday nights, Saturday nights in my grandparents' house,

673
00:30:47,120 --> 00:30:49,000
Speaker 1: you had to be in bed, right, and if they

674
00:30:49,040 --> 00:30:52,320
Speaker 1: hear you making any noise in your ass, work right.

675
00:30:52,600 --> 00:30:54,600
Speaker 2: So it's like nine thirty in the summertime.

676
00:30:54,880 --> 00:30:58,640
Speaker 1: It's me and my cousins, we all laughing, joking, my

677
00:30:58,760 --> 00:31:02,800
Speaker 1: grandfather coming there and Charles Ellen, yeah, boy.

678
00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:05,440
Speaker 2: Stopped that laughing like a piece of rock. I don't listen,

679
00:31:08,320 --> 00:31:12,400
Speaker 2: like as strong as I can be.

680
00:31:12,600 --> 00:31:12,680
Speaker 3: You.

681
00:31:12,800 --> 00:31:14,920
Speaker 2: My grandfather came in with the belt so fast.

682
00:31:16,320 --> 00:31:20,960
Speaker 1: What I was like, Yo, we got beat for being

683
00:31:21,080 --> 00:31:24,360
Speaker 1: kids that having fun and loving beat.

684
00:31:24,200 --> 00:31:26,400
Speaker 3: All of us the night before like a piece of rock.

685
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:32,000
Speaker 1: Like, yeah, we went through a lot of kids. Milendia

686
00:31:32,080 --> 00:31:35,240
Speaker 1: has been through a lot though. Man and Matt too,

687
00:31:35,400 --> 00:31:36,000
Speaker 1: even though he's.

688
00:31:35,920 --> 00:31:39,360
Speaker 2: Not clearly by my beating, so you could tell him

689
00:31:40,240 --> 00:31:44,400
Speaker 2: you got beat. Fact, we don't be beating. Yeah, because

690
00:31:44,440 --> 00:31:45,320
Speaker 2: it's the biggest one.

691
00:31:45,560 --> 00:31:47,840
Speaker 5: What's that You got McDonald's money.

692
00:31:48,200 --> 00:31:51,400
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that's the blackest thing. I said that to

693
00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:54,360
Speaker 2: my mom. I couldn't wait to say that.

694
00:31:54,760 --> 00:31:57,040
Speaker 7: And then you gotta go home and eat meat loaf

695
00:31:57,040 --> 00:31:57,640
Speaker 7: and green beer.

696
00:31:58,360 --> 00:32:00,720
Speaker 1: Oh my god, how about your all time you he

697
00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:05,880
Speaker 1: can make a burger just like McDonald's and.

698
00:32:02,520 --> 00:32:08,000
Speaker 2: The George Foreman girl and the white wonder bread.

699
00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:13,680
Speaker 6: Oh my, goat this mole or just that that sentence.

700
00:32:13,720 --> 00:32:15,360
Speaker 6: I can I can make you that you ain't getting

701
00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:15,720
Speaker 6: that ship.

702
00:32:15,720 --> 00:32:19,680
Speaker 5: I make that you never seen Its like a needle,

703
00:32:20,320 --> 00:32:20,640
Speaker 5: is right?

704
00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:26,040
Speaker 2: Do it right now? I do it right now. I

705
00:32:26,040 --> 00:32:27,720
Speaker 2: don't care. I don't care.

706
00:32:27,760 --> 00:32:29,800
Speaker 3: There was nothing like craving McDonald's and then your parents

707
00:32:29,880 --> 00:32:31,840
Speaker 3: driving past it. You was gonna get it and you

708
00:32:31,880 --> 00:32:33,280
Speaker 3: had to go home and eat what was cooked.

709
00:32:33,520 --> 00:32:35,240
Speaker 8: But it's the best thing because when you get it,

710
00:32:35,240 --> 00:32:37,560
Speaker 8: you appreciate it. Man, we was getting McDonald's ever day.

711
00:32:37,560 --> 00:32:38,400
Speaker 8: It wouldn't be the same.

712
00:32:38,280 --> 00:32:39,960
Speaker 3: Wouldn't be the same. It was a delicacy for us.

713
00:32:40,040 --> 00:32:41,600
Speaker 3: We used to get it like every now and again.

714
00:32:42,080 --> 00:32:43,480
Speaker 3: It was really not It was like an event.

715
00:32:44,000 --> 00:32:46,280
Speaker 1: Fast food was a delicacy back then. Now it's becoming

716
00:32:46,280 --> 00:32:49,440
Speaker 1: the norm. It's just a different generation. Like our kids

717
00:32:49,440 --> 00:32:51,720
Speaker 1: don't eat fast food as much as other kids do

718
00:32:52,640 --> 00:32:54,880
Speaker 1: it on Fridays. We only had it on Wednesday. Yes,

719
00:32:54,920 --> 00:32:57,400
Speaker 1: And we could get a burger from Dairy Queen one

720
00:32:57,480 --> 00:32:58,640
Speaker 1: day a week in the summer time.

721
00:32:58,680 --> 00:33:00,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, you might get pizza, you might.

722
00:33:00,720 --> 00:33:04,440
Speaker 10: Get we get a cheeseburger special from Kennedy Fried Chicken.

723
00:33:05,240 --> 00:33:07,640
Speaker 3: Did you guys have spaghetti at least one time a week,

724
00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:08,840
Speaker 3: one night a week.

725
00:33:09,120 --> 00:33:09,720
Speaker 2: Every other week.

726
00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:13,800
Speaker 1: It was dedicated every Tuesday, And I totally understand.

727
00:33:14,440 --> 00:33:21,920
Speaker 6: I still have spaghetti one night a week. Ch we

728
00:33:21,920 --> 00:33:24,800
Speaker 6: weren't allowed to eat because made.

729
00:33:24,000 --> 00:33:26,760
Speaker 5: We made macaccinogie.

730
00:33:27,040 --> 00:33:29,280
Speaker 2: But we didn't do it every month. Though we didn't

731
00:33:29,320 --> 00:33:29,520
Speaker 2: do it.

732
00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:32,960
Speaker 1: We had we had oh grandparents was Wednesdays there we

733
00:33:32,960 --> 00:33:34,120
Speaker 1: had spaghetti Wednesdays.

734
00:33:34,560 --> 00:33:38,400
Speaker 2: Every Wednesday. Friday was either Chinese food or pizza.

735
00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:42,400
Speaker 1: Monday, my father made pork chops Tuesday with smothered chicken.

736
00:33:42,760 --> 00:33:45,080
Speaker 1: Thursday would be the leftover from whatever we had those

737
00:33:45,080 --> 00:33:46,880
Speaker 1: three days. That was like in my house, it was

738
00:33:47,320 --> 00:33:51,680
Speaker 1: smothered chicken, pork chop uh, spaghetti leftover, and then fast

739
00:33:51,720 --> 00:33:55,080
Speaker 1: food was a rotation, rotation yea, and my father. My

740
00:33:55,120 --> 00:33:57,600
Speaker 1: father did most of the cooking except for Wednesday. Wednesdays

741
00:33:57,640 --> 00:33:58,640
Speaker 1: my mother cooked on Wednesday.

742
00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:01,200
Speaker 7: Wow, something my dad didn't cook.

743
00:34:01,240 --> 00:34:02,720
Speaker 6: So I ate a lot of fast food, or I

744
00:34:02,840 --> 00:34:05,680
Speaker 6: ate at my grandma's house before my dad got married.

745
00:34:05,840 --> 00:34:09,160
Speaker 6: If I wasn't at my mom's house. So I've had

746
00:34:09,239 --> 00:34:15,960
Speaker 6: every or it was either burging Wendy's McDonald's or red lobster, red.

747
00:34:16,600 --> 00:34:20,680
Speaker 2: Man, blackism. Where did you'll go? Graduation? Where you go

748
00:34:20,760 --> 00:34:21,200
Speaker 2: for birthday?

749
00:34:21,480 --> 00:34:27,920
Speaker 1: Red with the graduation and we knew it was new

750
00:34:27,960 --> 00:34:31,799
Speaker 1: to allerg Oh, red lobster, We're still going.

751
00:34:34,160 --> 00:34:36,279
Speaker 2: Parents wanted my dad had the same meal every time

752
00:34:36,360 --> 00:34:40,200
Speaker 2: we went again. I'm getting ultimate feast that was mine.

753
00:34:41,480 --> 00:34:44,520
Speaker 3: Another blackism is putting on the end of everything red lobsters.

754
00:34:46,800 --> 00:34:51,799
Speaker 2: Every us, one of us did. I just red because

755
00:34:51,800 --> 00:34:52,920
Speaker 2: you wanted over here. I was like.

756
00:34:55,640 --> 00:34:57,640
Speaker 3: Speaking of all the things that we had to day

757
00:34:57,719 --> 00:34:58,800
Speaker 3: this magic.

758
00:34:59,360 --> 00:35:03,120
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, my dad still goes to real Lobster for

759
00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:04,319
Speaker 6: his birthday every year.

760
00:35:04,440 --> 00:35:07,959
Speaker 7: All this day day, Preacher's Day.

761
00:35:08,800 --> 00:35:11,480
Speaker 6: You know what I'm saying, Whatever President's Day, he'd be

762
00:35:11,560 --> 00:35:12,520
Speaker 6: up in real Lobster.

763
00:35:13,880 --> 00:35:16,479
Speaker 1: You know what's funny, man, I don't I think about

764
00:35:17,120 --> 00:35:19,960
Speaker 1: blackisms and even the ones that were traumatic for us,

765
00:35:19,960 --> 00:35:21,000
Speaker 1: getting beat up and.

766
00:35:22,520 --> 00:35:23,120
Speaker 2: All that stuff.

767
00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:26,840
Speaker 1: I wouldn't change anything, Like I am exactly who I

768
00:35:26,840 --> 00:35:29,479
Speaker 1: am because my parents was being exactly who they needed

769
00:35:29,480 --> 00:35:32,480
Speaker 1: to be in that moment we coming off the eighties

770
00:35:32,520 --> 00:35:34,920
Speaker 1: crack epidemic. Think about what our parents were fighting against

771
00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:38,560
Speaker 1: during that time, right, they all had kids around middle

772
00:35:38,600 --> 00:35:41,400
Speaker 1: of the eighties, late eighties, early nineties that was coming

773
00:35:41,440 --> 00:35:43,840
Speaker 1: off the crack epidemic, So they was trying to hold

774
00:35:43,840 --> 00:35:45,960
Speaker 1: their kids. So sometimes you got to do that a

775
00:35:45,960 --> 00:35:48,799
Speaker 1: little bit more aggressively, like no, you're not doing that well.

776
00:35:48,800 --> 00:35:51,080
Speaker 3: The blackisms too. When I think about it, ultimately, it

777
00:35:51,080 --> 00:35:54,640
Speaker 3: boils down to the care that we were taking in ourselves,

778
00:35:54,640 --> 00:35:57,000
Speaker 3: the pride in ourselves. You know, you think about our

779
00:35:57,000 --> 00:35:59,520
Speaker 3: parents and our grandparents generation. All they wanted to do

780
00:35:59,560 --> 00:36:02,200
Speaker 3: was be seen as human beings who were put together,

781
00:36:02,280 --> 00:36:05,440
Speaker 3: who were civilized, you know, who were clean, who you know,

782
00:36:05,520 --> 00:36:08,560
Speaker 3: ey hearn their clothes and even going out to restaurants,

783
00:36:08,840 --> 00:36:11,240
Speaker 3: it was like a production. You had to dress nicely

784
00:36:11,719 --> 00:36:13,439
Speaker 3: and you had to go out and do graduating. Dress

785
00:36:13,520 --> 00:36:15,200
Speaker 3: up for church was the same thing. It was like

786
00:36:15,239 --> 00:36:19,480
Speaker 3: a taking pride in oneself that we've.

787
00:36:18,840 --> 00:36:19,920
Speaker 2: Taught absolutely right.

788
00:36:20,320 --> 00:36:22,680
Speaker 1: A huge blackism was pride in how you dressed, like

789
00:36:22,680 --> 00:36:24,360
Speaker 1: we were going to show these and we would be

790
00:36:24,360 --> 00:36:26,400
Speaker 1: the only people in there with hard bottomed shoes on

791
00:36:26,480 --> 00:36:27,000
Speaker 1: their slacks.

792
00:36:27,280 --> 00:36:30,440
Speaker 6: Man, I used to be pissed every Metrio day, every

793
00:36:30,480 --> 00:36:33,600
Speaker 6: picture day they taking a picture from hero I wouldn't

794
00:36:33,600 --> 00:36:36,280
Speaker 6: have on a shirt with a big ass lace bib

795
00:36:36,360 --> 00:36:40,160
Speaker 6: on it, a skirt some opaque stuck and the opaque joints,

796
00:36:40,239 --> 00:36:41,720
Speaker 6: some damn pat leather shoes.

797
00:36:41,760 --> 00:36:44,759
Speaker 7: I would be so fucking mad. Can't you just put

798
00:36:44,840 --> 00:36:45,719
Speaker 7: a shirt on?

799
00:36:45,880 --> 00:36:46,000
Speaker 1: Yo?

800
00:36:46,239 --> 00:36:47,160
Speaker 7: Like this is crazy?

801
00:36:47,360 --> 00:36:49,440
Speaker 1: So funny you say that because when I started, we

802
00:36:49,520 --> 00:36:51,239
Speaker 1: went to an all black school when we was growing up.

803
00:36:51,680 --> 00:36:54,080
Speaker 1: Then when I transitioned to public school in New York,

804
00:36:54,120 --> 00:36:56,239
Speaker 1: I went to school with a whole bunch of other kids,

805
00:36:56,600 --> 00:36:59,719
Speaker 1: and I did notice that the black kids dressed one

806
00:36:59,719 --> 00:37:01,960
Speaker 1: way during the regular school day, but then picture day

807
00:37:02,600 --> 00:37:06,239
Speaker 1: we dressed up other cultures treated picture day like this

808
00:37:06,280 --> 00:37:08,800
Speaker 1: is how they dressed any other day. But I noticed

809
00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:12,200
Speaker 1: the black ism, like we get dressed the fuck like

810
00:37:12,239 --> 00:37:13,440
Speaker 1: it looked like Easter.

811
00:37:13,280 --> 00:37:15,920
Speaker 2: For all of the black kids. Yes, we do. And

812
00:37:15,960 --> 00:37:18,759
Speaker 2: that's why if you.

813
00:37:18,840 --> 00:37:22,640
Speaker 8: Get like an engagement session from like right now, like

814
00:37:22,840 --> 00:37:26,920
Speaker 8: Black Americans or black in general proms, Yes, it's supposed to.

815
00:37:27,280 --> 00:37:29,120
Speaker 8: I got to get decked out. But then you might

816
00:37:29,160 --> 00:37:31,600
Speaker 8: look at somebody in the Midwest, it might be a

817
00:37:31,640 --> 00:37:35,879
Speaker 8: button down and some jeans.

818
00:37:34,080 --> 00:37:39,440
Speaker 7: A black person he shot fired.

819
00:37:40,960 --> 00:37:45,800
Speaker 1: I'm just saying I've seen proms all over the country, Chicago, Florida,

820
00:37:46,040 --> 00:37:48,359
Speaker 1: New York, because it just happened these past couple of weeks.

821
00:37:48,680 --> 00:37:51,080
Speaker 1: All these kids is pulling up with Lamborghinis, full tuxy,

822
00:37:51,360 --> 00:37:53,720
Speaker 1: some of them not even going to college, but they dressed.

823
00:37:54,800 --> 00:37:57,080
Speaker 7: There was a girl with his address that was made

824
00:37:57,080 --> 00:37:57,680
Speaker 7: of money.

825
00:37:58,000 --> 00:38:01,760
Speaker 2: I seen that all one hundred dollar bills. You are broke.

826
00:38:02,480 --> 00:38:06,920
Speaker 6: Yes, yes, the black Mega productions.

827
00:38:07,200 --> 00:38:09,800
Speaker 2: But the truth is, though it comes from that scarcity mindset.

828
00:38:10,160 --> 00:38:12,600
Speaker 1: Our parents and our parents' parents grew up at a

829
00:38:12,600 --> 00:38:15,040
Speaker 1: time where black people didn't have much, and the things

830
00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:17,239
Speaker 1: that they did have people often tried to take from

831
00:38:17,239 --> 00:38:20,920
Speaker 1: them right, So I understand that mentali especially with my grandmother.

832
00:38:21,320 --> 00:38:24,399
Speaker 1: My grandmother it was Meta von Brian and my sister Tory,

833
00:38:24,960 --> 00:38:28,200
Speaker 1: Tory her hair is like mine. It's coarse, but when

834
00:38:28,239 --> 00:38:32,440
Speaker 1: you brush it out, it's healthy. She brushed my sister's

835
00:38:32,440 --> 00:38:35,839
Speaker 1: hair every morning, parted it, and manicured it every morning.

836
00:38:35,960 --> 00:38:38,520
Speaker 1: Told my sister, when you go outside this house, you

837
00:38:38,719 --> 00:38:40,920
Speaker 1: better look respectable because if you don't, it is a

838
00:38:40,960 --> 00:38:44,080
Speaker 1: reflection of us, and I'm not having it, and.

839
00:38:44,239 --> 00:38:45,840
Speaker 2: I look like, why you always be on us?

840
00:38:45,880 --> 00:38:47,879
Speaker 1: And she told me, like, Yo, when I was growing up,

841
00:38:48,440 --> 00:38:51,040
Speaker 1: black people didn't have much, so what we had we

842
00:38:51,080 --> 00:38:53,200
Speaker 1: took care of it, and we taught our kids to

843
00:38:53,239 --> 00:38:55,360
Speaker 1: take care of it. And they raised us with an

844
00:38:55,400 --> 00:38:58,560
Speaker 1: iron fist. Because same thing my grandmother said when I

845
00:38:58,600 --> 00:39:00,799
Speaker 1: was growing up, if you looked at in the wrong way,

846
00:39:01,120 --> 00:39:02,879
Speaker 1: your little ass would be hanging up from a tree

847
00:39:02,960 --> 00:39:05,400
Speaker 1: and nobody would care. So what kind of made me

848
00:39:05,480 --> 00:39:12,400
Speaker 1: understand why they came with with such heavy discipline, because

849
00:39:12,440 --> 00:39:14,800
Speaker 1: it was life or death for them always, you know

850
00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:16,239
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, Even in how you dress.

851
00:39:16,400 --> 00:39:18,080
Speaker 7: Yeah, we had a.

852
00:39:20,040 --> 00:39:25,040
Speaker 6: Shelf full of toys that had never been opened and

853
00:39:25,120 --> 00:39:28,919
Speaker 6: would never be opened because my mama was like, y'all

854
00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:31,719
Speaker 6: so damn destructive, y'all gonna tear these damn toys up.

855
00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:37,719
Speaker 7: We never got to play with those.

856
00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:39,279
Speaker 2: At them.

857
00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:41,520
Speaker 6: Yeah, probably we probably got off her Christmas or my

858
00:39:41,560 --> 00:39:42,439
Speaker 6: dad bought them or something.

859
00:39:42,480 --> 00:39:42,880
Speaker 2: Then she was.

860
00:39:46,200 --> 00:39:48,920
Speaker 6: No board games and ship. We'd be just looking at

861
00:39:48,960 --> 00:39:54,000
Speaker 6: them like I wish I could play candy Land. I

862
00:39:54,040 --> 00:39:59,239
Speaker 6: don't know what it's like.

863
00:40:00,120 --> 00:40:06,520
Speaker 1: Trying to cabinet all limits until yeah, cabin yes we did. Okay,

864
00:40:06,760 --> 00:40:09,719
Speaker 1: yes we didn't, and we still don't. Can't playing around it.

865
00:40:09,840 --> 00:40:10,480
Speaker 2: You can't.

866
00:40:10,920 --> 00:40:14,759
Speaker 8: Don't even open My mother till this day we'll be like,

867
00:40:14,800 --> 00:40:15,439
Speaker 8: don't mess around.

868
00:40:16,000 --> 00:40:17,760
Speaker 2: She called a breakfront. Do mess around?

869
00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:25,359
Speaker 8: Breakfront that's gonna break was terrorized my entire childhood. I

870
00:40:25,400 --> 00:40:28,720
Speaker 8: am forty two years ago right now. I still can't

871
00:40:28,960 --> 00:40:33,000
Speaker 8: mess around like my little cousins, my daughter, whoever is

872
00:40:33,040 --> 00:40:34,040
Speaker 8: at her house.

873
00:40:34,280 --> 00:40:35,879
Speaker 2: You mess around with her break front?

874
00:40:36,520 --> 00:40:39,399
Speaker 8: Is she using anything in there? No, that she going

875
00:40:39,440 --> 00:40:42,320
Speaker 8: in and dust it out, nover that she does? She

876
00:40:42,440 --> 00:40:46,000
Speaker 8: care about every single thing in there. Absolutely, that's crazy.

877
00:40:46,040 --> 00:40:47,879
Speaker 8: I remember as a kid. I remember as a kid

878
00:40:47,920 --> 00:40:50,200
Speaker 8: there was a family on our block. There's a Haitian family.

879
00:40:50,960 --> 00:40:54,840
Speaker 8: And we saw the we saw one of the guys.

880
00:40:54,840 --> 00:40:56,640
Speaker 8: There was a bunch of them that lived in this apartment,

881
00:40:56,719 --> 00:41:00,400
Speaker 8: and we saw like the eldest brother like out of

882
00:41:00,400 --> 00:41:03,000
Speaker 8: the house and like run down the block and always

883
00:41:03,040 --> 00:41:05,000
Speaker 8: like younger siblings and sister like.

884
00:41:05,920 --> 00:41:10,360
Speaker 5: Ran down was like where you're going, know my young mind.

885
00:41:10,920 --> 00:41:12,840
Speaker 8: In my mind, the only thing that I can imagine

886
00:41:12,840 --> 00:41:14,840
Speaker 8: that he did that was bad enough that would warned

887
00:41:14,880 --> 00:41:16,480
Speaker 8: him to run down a block.

888
00:41:16,400 --> 00:41:19,200
Speaker 2: And everyone screaming for him to come home.

889
00:41:19,280 --> 00:41:24,320
Speaker 5: Is that he broke that Lady Bakro.

890
00:41:24,440 --> 00:41:26,680
Speaker 8: I thought he broke that breakfront, and he was good

891
00:41:26,680 --> 00:41:28,719
Speaker 8: because that's how I would have been if I had

892
00:41:28,840 --> 00:41:30,719
Speaker 8: done anything in that house to break that thing.

893
00:41:31,239 --> 00:41:32,799
Speaker 2: It's the biggest thing in the house.

894
00:41:32,600 --> 00:41:37,400
Speaker 3: Man, and they value it so much. My grandmother again,

895
00:41:37,480 --> 00:41:40,360
Speaker 3: bless her heart, she passed last year, and that was

896
00:41:40,400 --> 00:41:42,520
Speaker 3: like one thing. As she was declining, she was like, KK,

897
00:41:42,680 --> 00:41:45,239
Speaker 3: you know, I'm leaving the breakfront and the table and

898
00:41:45,360 --> 00:41:47,720
Speaker 3: chair set for you. You know, I said, leaving.

899
00:41:47,640 --> 00:41:49,680
Speaker 7: It for what where?

900
00:41:50,040 --> 00:41:51,680
Speaker 5: I think you could sell the stuff in there.

901
00:41:51,719 --> 00:41:53,359
Speaker 8: I think if you ever needed money, I think that's

902
00:41:53,360 --> 00:41:56,080
Speaker 8: what the That's what I think because I was hoping.

903
00:41:56,640 --> 00:41:59,839
Speaker 3: I was all that ship to my house. It's china

904
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:02,960
Speaker 3: with the function, right, but also girl like, nobody wants

905
00:42:03,360 --> 00:42:06,360
Speaker 3: break friends anymore, and china cabinets and china.

906
00:42:06,640 --> 00:42:08,480
Speaker 2: That was value valuable to me.

907
00:42:08,719 --> 00:42:11,359
Speaker 3: Being able to attain something like that was huge.

908
00:42:11,480 --> 00:42:13,920
Speaker 1: Let me ask the question, were y'all able to walk by?

909
00:42:14,160 --> 00:42:15,960
Speaker 1: Were you able to walk by the breakfronts?

910
00:42:16,160 --> 00:42:17,320
Speaker 2: Yeah? We had no choice.

911
00:42:17,480 --> 00:42:19,760
Speaker 1: My grandmother, you could not walk in her living room.

912
00:42:20,360 --> 00:42:23,360
Speaker 1: She had a kitchen and a den, and the living

913
00:42:23,400 --> 00:42:28,000
Speaker 1: room was through the middle, and then it was the bedrooms, right, Yes,

914
00:42:28,400 --> 00:42:31,839
Speaker 1: and she'd better see you passing through if she ever

915
00:42:31,880 --> 00:42:34,080
Speaker 1: came in that living room and you had stopped for

916
00:42:34,160 --> 00:42:35,560
Speaker 1: longer than a second and a half.

917
00:42:37,320 --> 00:42:41,240
Speaker 2: What you're doing in there? Thank you for breaking my stuff.

918
00:42:43,480 --> 00:42:45,960
Speaker 2: I stopped to look at the fucking china, lady.

919
00:42:46,800 --> 00:42:51,120
Speaker 1: Fine, that's how crazy my grandmother was about that day.

920
00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:53,560
Speaker 8: I think if my mom had the space, she would

921
00:42:53,600 --> 00:42:55,480
Speaker 8: be just like that. I think she had an extra

922
00:42:55,600 --> 00:42:56,960
Speaker 8: room to just put her valuables in it.

923
00:42:57,040 --> 00:43:00,600
Speaker 2: You better not be in there, my grandmother didn't. No games.

924
00:43:01,200 --> 00:43:03,959
Speaker 3: I love to let our kids run in this house.

925
00:43:04,040 --> 00:43:05,080
Speaker 2: Yes you do, Yes, we do.

926
00:43:05,200 --> 00:43:07,319
Speaker 3: Our kids do what they bounce the ball, they be

927
00:43:07,360 --> 00:43:07,800
Speaker 3: on the school.

928
00:43:08,160 --> 00:43:11,480
Speaker 2: They different type of black man, these kids in here. No,

929
00:43:11,600 --> 00:43:14,080
Speaker 2: it's frustrated, frustrating.

930
00:43:14,080 --> 00:43:15,759
Speaker 6: He a't able to sit in the house and hear

931
00:43:15,960 --> 00:43:19,360
Speaker 6: the ball bouncing inside number one on the Yeah, that

932
00:43:19,440 --> 00:43:20,240
Speaker 6: can't help regulate.

933
00:43:21,040 --> 00:43:23,919
Speaker 1: Kids want to beat the biggest man.

934
00:43:23,960 --> 00:43:25,040
Speaker 2: They be bouncing that ball.

935
00:43:25,120 --> 00:43:27,600
Speaker 1: I'd be like, how about this, you say, my house,

936
00:43:27,800 --> 00:43:31,880
Speaker 1: how about this? They can ride the scooter through the house.

937
00:43:31,960 --> 00:43:35,919
Speaker 1: I'll be yeah, watch our dad. I'll be like, yo, Well, yeah,

938
00:43:35,920 --> 00:43:36,840
Speaker 1: I got TV kids.

939
00:43:36,880 --> 00:43:38,880
Speaker 2: Good, that's what that is. TV.

940
00:43:39,560 --> 00:43:41,120
Speaker 8: That's how I got the kids that I used to

941
00:43:41,200 --> 00:43:44,799
Speaker 8: watch on TV. Like man, never get Yes.

942
00:43:45,080 --> 00:43:46,200
Speaker 5: I got White Mark kids.

943
00:43:46,560 --> 00:43:47,920
Speaker 2: White Markets is my kids. Now.

944
00:43:47,960 --> 00:43:49,560
Speaker 1: I wish my kids would try to curse me and

945
00:43:49,640 --> 00:43:52,759
Speaker 1: k I'd have four kids are like white Man imber, He.

946
00:43:52,760 --> 00:43:55,040
Speaker 2: Said, White Markets, those are the kids. When I was

947
00:43:55,080 --> 00:43:56,640
Speaker 2: a kid, I saw White Mark and.

948
00:43:56,719 --> 00:43:59,600
Speaker 1: Was like, I said, I wish them kids would try

949
00:43:59,600 --> 00:43:59,839
Speaker 1: to curse.

950
00:44:00,760 --> 00:44:10,279
Speaker 2: Y'all have to be three boys. One tried. He but

951
00:44:10,360 --> 00:44:11,880
Speaker 2: I do love that for them. No, I told my

952
00:44:11,920 --> 00:44:13,719
Speaker 2: boys to be free, be free.

953
00:44:13,760 --> 00:44:16,240
Speaker 1: They be back there jumping off the thing and jumping

954
00:44:16,239 --> 00:44:18,160
Speaker 1: in the pool and screaming because you know what, I

955
00:44:18,239 --> 00:44:21,040
Speaker 1: used to hate to go into the pool with my grandparents,

956
00:44:21,320 --> 00:44:21,560
Speaker 1: and she.

957
00:44:21,600 --> 00:44:24,680
Speaker 2: Said, don't run, don't smile, be quiet. I'm like, we're

958
00:44:24,719 --> 00:44:25,280
Speaker 2: at the pool.

959
00:44:25,840 --> 00:44:28,120
Speaker 1: Everybody else is running around screaming, and if we run

960
00:44:28,160 --> 00:44:29,640
Speaker 1: by and screaming, she look at us, You're.

961
00:44:29,520 --> 00:44:34,040
Speaker 2: Like a jumps. Oh. She would call my grandfather hit me,

962
00:44:34,880 --> 00:44:37,040
Speaker 2: hit me. Ain't trying to drown his brother in the pool. No,

963
00:44:37,120 --> 00:44:39,440
Speaker 2: I'm not. We're just playing.

964
00:44:38,840 --> 00:44:42,160
Speaker 8: It is probably it is probably liberating for them. I mean,

965
00:44:42,200 --> 00:44:44,359
Speaker 8: they probably don't know what the liberation that they have,

966
00:44:44,560 --> 00:44:46,959
Speaker 8: but it is. It is good scene and be able

967
00:44:46,960 --> 00:44:49,319
Speaker 8: to be freeing operating that space because you don't know

968
00:44:49,360 --> 00:44:50,440
Speaker 8: what that like unlocks.

969
00:44:50,960 --> 00:44:54,280
Speaker 5: You know, for me, it's like trauma, Like it probably

970
00:44:54,360 --> 00:44:55,200
Speaker 5: is trauma.

971
00:44:55,239 --> 00:44:59,400
Speaker 8: That's probably like enabled me to like navigate in spaces

972
00:44:59,400 --> 00:45:01,120
Speaker 8: and under staying with my parents has been through.

973
00:45:01,120 --> 00:45:03,680
Speaker 2: But your kids, man them niggas. They live.

974
00:45:03,920 --> 00:45:05,680
Speaker 5: They live in a good life, I think.

975
00:45:05,560 --> 00:45:07,080
Speaker 3: Because they have the freedom to do it at home.

976
00:45:07,080 --> 00:45:08,759
Speaker 3: When they are in public, they know how to do

977
00:45:09,320 --> 00:45:12,200
Speaker 3: and they just chilling. See kids cut loose.

978
00:45:12,280 --> 00:45:14,319
Speaker 5: Yes, that duality they have is great.

979
00:45:14,440 --> 00:45:16,440
Speaker 3: Yes, because whenever we go out, people are like, how

980
00:45:16,440 --> 00:45:18,000
Speaker 3: can you get your voice to just fall in line

981
00:45:18,000 --> 00:45:20,560
Speaker 3: and they're so cheap. I remember they want at home

982
00:45:21,320 --> 00:45:21,760
Speaker 3: the house.

983
00:45:21,960 --> 00:45:25,320
Speaker 6: Yeah, we went to like Dave and Busters for Jackson's

984
00:45:25,320 --> 00:45:28,959
Speaker 6: Basketball Awards ceremony, like somewhere that's like the most fun

985
00:45:28,960 --> 00:45:31,399
Speaker 6: place for kids to be. And when it was time

986
00:45:31,440 --> 00:45:34,479
Speaker 6: to go, somebody said kiro cast that was right there.

987
00:45:35,640 --> 00:45:38,080
Speaker 5: Ellis Yeah.

988
00:45:38,280 --> 00:45:42,680
Speaker 12: I was like wow, all them Wow, And third time

989
00:45:42,760 --> 00:45:45,200
Speaker 12: calling them there might be a situation where like with us,

990
00:45:45,239 --> 00:45:47,680
Speaker 12: we were just we had to be such a way

991
00:45:47,719 --> 00:45:49,920
Speaker 12: when we were at home that you know, when you

992
00:45:49,960 --> 00:45:52,799
Speaker 12: get outside, you just bug out absolutely, whereas they don't.

993
00:45:52,880 --> 00:45:54,960
Speaker 8: They don't need to bug out because they can bug

994
00:45:54,960 --> 00:45:55,880
Speaker 8: out all they want.

995
00:45:55,800 --> 00:45:57,120
Speaker 2: Absolutely when they go outside.

996
00:45:57,480 --> 00:46:00,239
Speaker 1: Like let me just that was the mindset that It

997
00:46:00,360 --> 00:46:02,560
Speaker 1: was the mindset when me and Ka talked about it

998
00:46:02,640 --> 00:46:04,480
Speaker 1: and we first got this house and they were dribbling

999
00:46:04,520 --> 00:46:06,440
Speaker 1: the ball and stuff like that, and at first we

1000
00:46:06,440 --> 00:46:08,560
Speaker 1: were like yo, chill stop and then we were like, yo,

1001
00:46:08,600 --> 00:46:10,440
Speaker 1: this this is their house as much as it is

1002
00:46:10,480 --> 00:46:10,919
Speaker 1: our house.

1003
00:46:11,000 --> 00:46:11,280
Speaker 7: Yeah.

1004
00:46:11,320 --> 00:46:13,680
Speaker 1: And if you can't enjoy the space that you live

1005
00:46:13,760 --> 00:46:16,279
Speaker 1: in and spend most of your time, where else can

1006
00:46:16,320 --> 00:46:17,120
Speaker 1: you enjoy it?

1007
00:46:17,320 --> 00:46:18,799
Speaker 2: So I was like, yo, let them do what they want.

1008
00:46:18,880 --> 00:46:21,440
Speaker 1: They'd be spilling stuff the coder right on the wall sometimes,

1009
00:46:21,440 --> 00:46:23,840
Speaker 1: and I'm like, I ain't tripping because when we go

1010
00:46:23,880 --> 00:46:25,879
Speaker 1: out and I say, yo, do not write on that wall,

1011
00:46:26,120 --> 00:46:28,200
Speaker 1: do not jump on that couch, They like, all right.

1012
00:46:28,080 --> 00:46:30,359
Speaker 2: Well I do it when I get home, so they

1013
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:34,359
Speaker 2: get the duality. Does it makes sense talking about all

1014
00:46:34,400 --> 00:46:34,800
Speaker 2: right stuff?

1015
00:46:34,800 --> 00:46:38,560
Speaker 3: He part of my left. All right, y'all, let's go

1016
00:46:38,600 --> 00:46:40,239
Speaker 3: ahead and take a quick break and we'll get back

1017
00:46:40,280 --> 00:46:43,800
Speaker 3: into our listener letter portion of the day. Be right back.

1018
00:46:56,000 --> 00:46:57,919
Speaker 3: All right, we're back. What you got for us today?

1019
00:46:57,920 --> 00:47:03,200
Speaker 2: Baby, I got this listener letter. It's not a long one, okay. Hey,

1020
00:47:03,280 --> 00:47:04,000
Speaker 2: Kadeen and Duvala.

1021
00:47:04,000 --> 00:47:05,960
Speaker 1: I just want to say that I appreciate your vulnerability

1022
00:47:05,960 --> 00:47:08,360
Speaker 1: and truth and allowing us listeners to have a perspective

1023
00:47:08,400 --> 00:47:10,839
Speaker 1: into your lives. Well, thank you so much. I am

1024
00:47:10,880 --> 00:47:12,759
Speaker 1: new to your podcast and have been watching from the

1025
00:47:12,760 --> 00:47:15,400
Speaker 1: beginning and have gained so many valuable tips already with

1026
00:47:15,520 --> 00:47:18,520
Speaker 1: just finishing season one. Hopefully I catch up at some

1027
00:47:18,560 --> 00:47:21,160
Speaker 1: point lol. But I'm a twenty four year old female

1028
00:47:21,200 --> 00:47:24,120
Speaker 1: from South Carolina. I graduated with the BS in biology

1029
00:47:24,160 --> 00:47:26,720
Speaker 1: and I aspire to be a nurse practitioner slash midwife.

1030
00:47:26,760 --> 00:47:27,799
Speaker 2: Okay, that's what's up.

1031
00:47:27,960 --> 00:47:29,920
Speaker 1: I often get overwhelmed with life because I feel like

1032
00:47:29,960 --> 00:47:31,239
Speaker 1: I could be doing so much more.

1033
00:47:31,520 --> 00:47:33,360
Speaker 2: What advice do you have for this time period of

1034
00:47:33,360 --> 00:47:35,840
Speaker 2: my life? My advice is to stop looking at social media.

1035
00:47:37,440 --> 00:47:39,760
Speaker 1: So many twenty four and twenty five year olds saying

1036
00:47:39,760 --> 00:47:41,919
Speaker 1: that they feel like they should be doing so much

1037
00:47:41,960 --> 00:47:45,680
Speaker 1: more simply because they're spending time watching other people lie

1038
00:47:45,719 --> 00:47:49,200
Speaker 1: about doing them the most most twenty four year olds

1039
00:47:49,280 --> 00:47:50,920
Speaker 1: aren't doing anything.

1040
00:47:51,120 --> 00:47:54,120
Speaker 2: Why. That's the part of life where you build, you're.

1041
00:47:54,000 --> 00:47:56,880
Speaker 1: Doing yo, you graduated, you got your BS, you focus

1042
00:47:56,960 --> 00:48:00,200
Speaker 1: on being a nurse practition and where you're doing everything

1043
00:48:00,280 --> 00:48:01,000
Speaker 1: that's amazing.

1044
00:48:01,120 --> 00:48:02,799
Speaker 2: Joy embrace it, love it.

1045
00:48:03,160 --> 00:48:06,040
Speaker 3: Enjoy the journey. My sister just graduated with her nurse

1046
00:48:06,080 --> 00:48:08,919
Speaker 3: practitioner license in women's health and men betree and all that. Well,

1047
00:48:08,960 --> 00:48:11,000
Speaker 3: she's not doing midle free, but you are. I mean,

1048
00:48:11,040 --> 00:48:13,319
Speaker 3: that's a great plan. The thing I envy about some

1049
00:48:13,360 --> 00:48:16,319
Speaker 3: of y'all twenty something year olds, well A is that

1050
00:48:16,360 --> 00:48:19,360
Speaker 3: the fact that you guys are so ambitious, and I

1051
00:48:19,400 --> 00:48:22,000
Speaker 3: think just seeing other people who you feel like maybe

1052
00:48:22,040 --> 00:48:24,719
Speaker 3: are having the lifestyle that you want, You're like, man,

1053
00:48:24,760 --> 00:48:27,120
Speaker 3: I should be doing that so keep that fire under

1054
00:48:27,160 --> 00:48:30,280
Speaker 3: your tip, keep that ambition, keep that drive, but also

1055
00:48:30,400 --> 00:48:33,440
Speaker 3: know to pace yourself like this is something that you

1056
00:48:33,520 --> 00:48:35,640
Speaker 3: slowly work towards. And I envy the fact that there's

1057
00:48:35,640 --> 00:48:37,759
Speaker 3: some twenty something year roles that know exactly what they

1058
00:48:37,800 --> 00:48:39,799
Speaker 3: want to do with their life and they're working towards it,

1059
00:48:39,840 --> 00:48:42,120
Speaker 3: because some people are well into their thirties and forties

1060
00:48:42,160 --> 00:48:44,319
Speaker 3: and still trying to figure that shit out. So just

1061
00:48:44,360 --> 00:48:46,359
Speaker 3: stay step fast. If you know that this is your

1062
00:48:46,400 --> 00:48:48,400
Speaker 3: passion and this is what you want to do, just

1063
00:48:48,520 --> 00:48:50,640
Speaker 3: keep doing it. You're doing fine, You're doing fine.

1064
00:48:50,719 --> 00:48:52,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, she says she feels stuck. You're not stuck. She

1065
00:48:52,680 --> 00:48:53,279
Speaker 2: just takes time.

1066
00:48:53,400 --> 00:48:55,319
Speaker 3: And that's one because we felt stuck in our twenties too,

1067
00:48:55,719 --> 00:48:56,440
Speaker 3: And trust.

1068
00:48:56,200 --> 00:48:58,239
Speaker 2: Me, we're not saying it like in our twenties we

1069
00:48:58,280 --> 00:48:59,000
Speaker 2: had it figured out.

1070
00:48:59,000 --> 00:48:59,719
Speaker 3: He did it.

1071
00:49:00,000 --> 00:49:00,359
Speaker 2: Twenty four.

1072
00:49:00,400 --> 00:49:02,840
Speaker 1: I felt stuck. Forty one, I feel stuck. And you

1073
00:49:02,880 --> 00:49:04,640
Speaker 1: know what people say to me at forty one, bro,

1074
00:49:04,760 --> 00:49:06,600
Speaker 1: take time. You're still at this part of your career.

1075
00:49:06,719 --> 00:49:09,480
Speaker 3: So right, so even with all we've attained and things

1076
00:49:09,520 --> 00:49:11,560
Speaker 3: that we've done, there's still more to do. You're never

1077
00:49:11,600 --> 00:49:13,799
Speaker 3: gonna stop feeling like that in life. Especially when you

1078
00:49:13,840 --> 00:49:18,439
Speaker 3: are somebody who is gold driven and ambitious. Any two

1079
00:49:18,480 --> 00:49:20,400
Speaker 3: cents over there, Josh Matt Tripple.

1080
00:49:20,239 --> 00:49:23,960
Speaker 6: Yeah, having goals and ambition ruined my life, so I

1081
00:49:24,000 --> 00:49:26,759
Speaker 6: would not recommend that shit very tooll.

1082
00:49:26,920 --> 00:49:27,759
Speaker 3: You just go off for bus.

1083
00:49:27,800 --> 00:49:29,160
Speaker 2: It wasn't real health the fuck out?

1084
00:49:29,200 --> 00:49:29,399
Speaker 3: Man.

1085
00:49:30,880 --> 00:49:32,239
Speaker 2: No, No, I think you said everything.

1086
00:49:33,239 --> 00:49:35,399
Speaker 3: That's good. That's good, all right, y'all. If you want

1087
00:49:35,400 --> 00:49:37,120
Speaker 3: to be featured as a listener letter, be sure to

1088
00:49:37,280 --> 00:49:42,160
Speaker 3: email us at the Ellis Advice at gmail dot com.

1089
00:49:42,360 --> 00:49:44,880
Speaker 2: That's t h e E l l I s A

1090
00:49:44,960 --> 00:49:46,680
Speaker 2: d v I s E e A Gmail.

1091
00:49:47,920 --> 00:49:51,120
Speaker 3: Your teeth look really good. I inspect him to listen.

1092
00:49:51,200 --> 00:49:53,720
Speaker 3: You don't just inspect your children, You got to inspect

1093
00:49:53,719 --> 00:49:54,560
Speaker 3: your spouses too.

1094
00:49:54,760 --> 00:49:56,719
Speaker 1: You can't let you can't leave a house, crazy wife.

1095
00:49:56,760 --> 00:49:58,360
Speaker 1: You always beet, come in, come in, let me see.

1096
00:49:58,160 --> 00:50:00,600
Speaker 3: Baby, because it's a reflection. Does anybody else agree that

1097
00:50:00,680 --> 00:50:02,719
Speaker 3: if you or your child leaves the house and your

1098
00:50:02,719 --> 00:50:06,359
Speaker 3: spouse leaves the house, typically they'd be like, damn, your

1099
00:50:06,400 --> 00:50:08,239
Speaker 3: mother didn't check for this, so your wife didn't check

1100
00:50:08,280 --> 00:50:10,080
Speaker 3: for that. Or someone comes to your house and the

1101
00:50:10,120 --> 00:50:11,799
Speaker 3: house is a mess, it's like, well she ain't you know?

1102
00:50:11,840 --> 00:50:16,600
Speaker 3: It always typically cleanliness, right, or you look homeless, it

1103
00:50:16,640 --> 00:50:18,600
Speaker 3: look like nobody loved you. Yeah, we don't want to

1104
00:50:18,640 --> 00:50:21,160
Speaker 3: have that. All right, Thank y'all so much for joining

1105
00:50:21,200 --> 00:50:23,839
Speaker 3: us today. Oh wait, moment of truth forgot that moment

1106
00:50:23,840 --> 00:50:30,920
Speaker 3: of truth on black? Is my truth be from minding

1107
00:50:32,200 --> 00:50:34,120
Speaker 3: my moment of truth is? I love being black? Man?

1108
00:50:34,640 --> 00:50:36,760
Speaker 3: I just love being black and all of the isms

1109
00:50:37,160 --> 00:50:39,360
Speaker 3: I love black and all of the joy, all of

1110
00:50:39,400 --> 00:50:42,839
Speaker 3: our inside jokes that like nobody else will get like.

1111
00:50:42,960 --> 00:50:46,080
Speaker 3: I just love being black. That's my moment of truth.

1112
00:50:46,160 --> 00:50:49,480
Speaker 1: That's my truth and every everything that comes with being black,

1113
00:50:49,960 --> 00:50:52,640
Speaker 1: everything that we've been through. It may sound crazy, but

1114
00:50:52,800 --> 00:50:56,640
Speaker 1: from slavery all the way through mass incarcerations and everything,

1115
00:50:56,640 --> 00:50:58,560
Speaker 1: I embrace all of it. It's part of who we are.

1116
00:50:58,640 --> 00:51:00,279
Speaker 1: It's part of what we've been through, is part of

1117
00:51:00,320 --> 00:51:03,360
Speaker 1: our story. I'm not gonna let the whitewashing of American

1118
00:51:03,440 --> 00:51:05,800
Speaker 1: history make me feel like that part of my blackness

1119
00:51:05,800 --> 00:51:08,000
Speaker 1: needs to be hidden. We' donet been through everything, and

1120
00:51:08,040 --> 00:51:10,520
Speaker 1: we conquered it. So I love it, baby, I love us,

1121
00:51:10,760 --> 00:51:13,759
Speaker 1: I love you, I love it, y'all, and I love

1122
00:51:13,840 --> 00:51:16,239
Speaker 1: myself y'all.

1123
00:51:17,040 --> 00:51:19,880
Speaker 2: No, please don't my grandfather.

1124
00:51:21,120 --> 00:51:23,319
Speaker 3: Rect of bees Cop. He was the sweetest guy. I

1125
00:51:23,360 --> 00:51:24,880
Speaker 3: love him. I'm missing so much.

1126
00:51:25,160 --> 00:51:25,799
Speaker 2: All right, y'all.

1127
00:51:25,800 --> 00:51:28,239
Speaker 3: If you're not following us yet on Patreon, be sure

1128
00:51:28,280 --> 00:51:31,200
Speaker 3: to subscribe so you can get more Ellis After Ellis

1129
00:51:31,200 --> 00:51:34,120
Speaker 3: ever After content, as well as the After Show and

1130
00:51:34,239 --> 00:51:38,160
Speaker 3: exclusive Ellis Family content. You can find us on Instagram

1131
00:51:38,200 --> 00:51:41,640
Speaker 3: at Ellis ever After and I am Kadeen, I am.

1132
00:51:41,840 --> 00:51:43,279
Speaker 2: And I am devale A.

1133
00:51:43,320 --> 00:51:45,200
Speaker 3: Y'all watching Divorced Sisters too. I don't know when this

1134
00:51:45,280 --> 00:51:48,320
Speaker 3: is watching my show. I should have been dropping it

1135
00:51:48,360 --> 00:51:51,160
Speaker 3: in all episodes. But you know, take this ride with

1136
00:51:51,239 --> 00:51:54,920
Speaker 3: Geneva real quick and see where she gotta go with Geneva.

1137
00:51:54,960 --> 00:51:56,719
Speaker 2: I get all the rods with Geneva. Don't listen to

1138
00:51:56,760 --> 00:51:57,600
Speaker 2: what she's saying.

1139
00:51:58,640 --> 00:52:00,240
Speaker 3: Sorry, man, tell him where to find you.

1140
00:52:00,239 --> 00:52:01,839
Speaker 10: You can find me at Matt letsp Photo dot com.

1141
00:52:01,880 --> 00:52:04,200
Speaker 10: You can check out that prince shop buy some Princeville all.

1142
00:52:05,360 --> 00:52:09,760
Speaker 8: You can find me at airing envy dot com.

1143
00:52:09,920 --> 00:52:11,000
Speaker 2: What's up? Copy?

1144
00:52:10,600 --> 00:52:13,720
Speaker 8: And I wasn't copy? She mentioned Geneva and Geneva's wearing

1145
00:52:13,800 --> 00:52:15,279
Speaker 8: airing out.

1146
00:52:15,400 --> 00:52:15,960
Speaker 2: Pick it up?

1147
00:52:16,120 --> 00:52:16,720
Speaker 3: All the guys.

1148
00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:19,160
Speaker 2: Uh that uh that showed divorce systerm.

1149
00:52:19,200 --> 00:52:22,560
Speaker 3: So please check out that show Divorces, the show Respect.

1150
00:52:24,560 --> 00:52:29,160
Speaker 5: She's wearing Airring Envy all throughout the show Divorces, so

1151
00:52:29,280 --> 00:52:32,279
Speaker 5: check out airing Envy and on Instagram airing Underscore Envy.

1152
00:52:32,560 --> 00:52:36,239
Speaker 6: I'm also wearing earring m V talk about it. Congratulations, man,

1153
00:52:36,239 --> 00:52:39,080
Speaker 6: you got some photos up on the Prince Shop. Amen,

1154
00:52:39,160 --> 00:52:41,680
Speaker 6: because we just brushed over that. Like Matt didn't say

1155
00:52:43,000 --> 00:52:44,480
Speaker 6: he was gonna do it.

1156
00:52:44,880 --> 00:52:48,640
Speaker 12: Talk about it coming, be talking about that bad because

1157
00:52:48,640 --> 00:52:50,960
Speaker 12: it's y'all's damn fault that I'm miserable.

1158
00:52:51,520 --> 00:52:53,560
Speaker 2: I'm not you. They're not gonna text me, You're gonna

1159
00:52:53,560 --> 00:52:54,120
Speaker 2: get fired.

1160
00:52:59,480 --> 00:53:03,160
Speaker 6: You can find me at tribs the Cool on Everything,

1161
00:53:03,360 --> 00:53:06,800
Speaker 6: And if you don't care about my health and mental health,

1162
00:53:06,960 --> 00:53:10,280
Speaker 6: you can book with me at tribscool dot com.

1163
00:53:10,600 --> 00:53:14,680
Speaker 7: I gotta pay this rent somehow, b b L.

1164
00:53:14,880 --> 00:53:15,560
Speaker 5: It's in the name.

1165
00:53:16,560 --> 00:53:19,319
Speaker 4: And if you're listening to Apple Podcast, be sure to rate,

1166
00:53:19,600 --> 00:53:21,200
Speaker 4: review and subscribe.

1167
00:53:21,400 --> 00:53:22,080
Speaker 2: Three to one.

1168
00:53:25,480 --> 00:53:30,520
Speaker 6: Got Ellis ever After is an iHeartMedia podcast. It's hosted

1169
00:53:30,560 --> 00:53:35,160
Speaker 6: by Kadeen and Deval Ellis. It's produced by Triple Video,

1170
00:53:35,280 --> 00:53:39,799
Speaker 6: Production by Joshua Duwaye and Matthew Ellis. Video editing by

1171
00:53:39,880 --> 00:53:40,680
Speaker 6: Lashan Rothe

1172
00:55:00,320 --> 00:55:21,800
Speaker 1: Sagonagona, Togona,