Speaker 1: On the Bell Cast, the questions asked if movies have
Speaker 1: women in them, Are all their discussions just boyfriends and husbands,
Speaker 1: or do they have in individualism the patriarchy? Zef invest
Speaker 1: start changing it with the beck Del cast. Oh man, yeah,
Speaker 1: let's find it. Let's find a good line. There's so
Speaker 1: many good lines. Wait, what about the one that Abigail
Speaker 1: Breslin says to Sarah Jessica Parker when she's like, you're
Speaker 1: just so moody and like possessive because you don't have
Speaker 1: a man and you're me the man in your life.
Speaker 1: I like the one where you're just so want to
Speaker 1: be a hipster who had is a heartbroken by the prompt?
Speaker 1: Oh wait, no, I know what My favorite line in
Speaker 1: my line, favorite line, and the exchange in the movie
Speaker 1: is okay, hopefully you remember the line store of talking
Speaker 1: about um So Caitlin, you're like a comic book artist?
Speaker 1: Do you like draw illustrate? Oh my god, I'm that
Speaker 1: was so aggressive. Welcome to the Bechel Cast. Well wait, wait, wait,
Speaker 1: which one was yours? Oh? My favorite line from the
Speaker 1: film The Prestige film from two thousand eleven, directed by
Speaker 1: Gary Marshall, New Year's Eve. My favorite line is let
Speaker 1: the best the JJ win And then everyone was like
Speaker 1: ha ha ha oh this what a what a happy
Speaker 1: almost new year everyone. Uh, this is the Bexel Cast.
Speaker 1: I'm Jamie Loftus, I'm Caitlin Darante, and this is our
Speaker 1: podcast about how movies fair when we look at them
Speaker 1: through an intersectional feminist lens, and folks, We're gonna have
Speaker 1: fun this week. I feel like we, uh, as as
Speaker 1: as an extended podcast family, have earned it. You know,
Speaker 1: it's been the biggest ship pile of a year on record,
Speaker 1: and it was that was a pretty competitive mark truly,
Speaker 1: So there's been some pretty shitty years in the history
Speaker 1: of the world. But you know what people were having
Speaker 1: a lot of optimism for was two thousand and twelve.
Speaker 1: Apparently there they made a whole movie about how excited
Speaker 1: we were for two thousand and twelve. Yeah, why wouldn't
Speaker 1: this movie have come out in like the end of nine,
Speaker 1: when like we were actually talking about like this new millennium.
Speaker 1: Why two k was a big thing? There was like
Speaker 1: so much maybe like two thousand, two thousand twelve was
Speaker 1: the year that some people thought the world would end
Speaker 1: because of the like oh, I forgot about the mine
Speaker 1: calendar thing. My theory was it was the entire movie
Speaker 1: was funded by Obama's re election campaign. They're just like right,
Speaker 1: I think they would have made a far better movie
Speaker 1: if that were true. I don't know. That's up for
Speaker 1: debate there. Uh, this movie has got off. Okay, so
Speaker 1: we're this is the Bechtel cast um. If this is
Speaker 1: your first episode, you know, maybe reconsiderate or or just
Speaker 1: hang out and see it's we're loose. We're loose today.
Speaker 1: But we're going to use the Bechtel test, I guess
Speaker 1: theoretically as a jumping off point for discussion, that being
Speaker 1: a media metric test invented by queer cartoonist Alison Bechdel,
Speaker 1: sometimes called the Bechtel Wallace test. There requires that, for
Speaker 1: our purposes, two people of a marginalized gender with names
Speaker 1: talk to each other about something other than a man
Speaker 1: for more than two lines of dialogue. Doesn't seem like
Speaker 1: it would be that hard. This movie really takes a
Speaker 1: long time to get there, really long. It does get there,
Speaker 1: and so it does, but it barely does anything. There's
Speaker 1: a whole scene in this movie where Sophia Vergara and
Speaker 1: Katherine Aigel, are just throwing eggs across a room. A
Speaker 1: feminist feminis n eggs symbolism. Okay, think about it. It's
Speaker 1: who we're talking about New Year's Eve, the movie that
Speaker 1: was supposed to get us all excited for two thousand
Speaker 1: and twelve. Do you do you have a history with
Speaker 1: this movie? Have you seen it before? I know I
Speaker 1: hadn't seen this before. Okay, I know I had seen
Speaker 1: the previous uh person cast Gary Marshall movie. I have
Speaker 1: seen Valentine's Day. Valentine's Day, sure, Okay, I have not
Speaker 1: seen that one either, Nor have I seen Mother's Day,
Speaker 1: which came out five years after this one, which is
Speaker 1: the like it's like an unofficial trilogy, because they're all
Speaker 1: Gary Marshall ensemble movies that are all bad. There's no
Speaker 1: way we were just talking about this off, Mike. There's
Speaker 1: no way Gary Marshall actually directed this entire movie. I
Speaker 1: feel like he hired ten assistant directors and paid them
Speaker 1: enough to not credit them appropriately, and then showed up
Speaker 1: for one. The true story of this movie for me
Speaker 1: is in the forty five minute blooper reel at the end. Uh,
Speaker 1: It's is pretty It's the most compelling part of the movie.
Speaker 1: I think Jessica Bielle gives a birth to two copies
Speaker 1: of Valentine Stand DVD in the blue on Blu ray Hello,
Speaker 1: because she's rich, which is which is why like her
Speaker 1: whole storyline makes no sense. Oh my gosh, no, now
Speaker 1: these storylines makes sense. I can't wait. This is like
Speaker 1: if uh, and we we you know, early in the
Speaker 1: cast we covered four years ago. At this point we
Speaker 1: covered Love Actually, And this is if I Love Actually,
Speaker 1: Like I don't even know, Like, if Love Actually got
Speaker 1: hit in the head really hard with the basketball, uh,
Speaker 1: the movie would maybe be something like this. It's trying
Speaker 1: to do the same vignette thing, but yes, instead of
Speaker 1: like would love Actually the vignettes makes sense, they're just
Speaker 1: generally pretty sexist and racist and dated. For this, these
Speaker 1: don't even make sense. That don't make sense at least,
Speaker 1: I mean, go back and listen to our Love Actually episode.
Speaker 1: We had plenty to say about it and like, it's
Speaker 1: very problematic in many ways, were not. At least Love Actually, though,
Speaker 1: has the ability to elicit like real emotion in audiences,
Speaker 1: Like people responded to that movie for a reason. I
Speaker 1: understand why people really liked it, like in a dated way,
Speaker 1: but like you're like, Okay, I I see, I see
Speaker 1: why people were into this at the time. No one
Speaker 1: was into this at the time. I think we're the
Speaker 1: first people that have watched it since it came out.
Speaker 1: It made Okay, it made a hundred and forty two
Speaker 1: million dollars at the box office. It was one I
Speaker 1: can't what else came out around that time that no
Speaker 1: one everyone had to go see New Year's Eve. Because
Speaker 1: that's actually a good question. My favorite fun fact about
Speaker 1: this movie is then it was nominated for five Razzie
Speaker 1: Awards and lost all of them to Jack and Jill
Speaker 1: uh Adam Sandler. Yes, um, so you know it wasn't
Speaker 1: even the worst movie to come out in that year. Um.
Speaker 1: It also has a seven percent on Rotten Tomatoes. And
Speaker 1: if you just like, if you look at the critical
Speaker 1: reception chunk on Wikipedia about this movie, it's very funny
Speaker 1: because like the quotes that get pulled about this movie
Speaker 1: are and like there's I mean, I'm just gonna read
Speaker 1: a couple. Okay. Roger Ebert, our favorite person, actually has
Speaker 1: something that we would agree with, says New Year's Eve
Speaker 1: is a dreary plod through the stands of time until
Speaker 1: finally the last grain has trickled through the glass of
Speaker 1: cinematic sludge. Shout up to sludge. How how is it
Speaker 1: possible to assemble more than two dozen stars in a
Speaker 1: movie and find nothing interesting for any of them to do?
Speaker 1: End quote Um Claudia Winkleman, not Claudia of BBC one.
Speaker 1: I have found the worst film of all time and
Speaker 1: it is called New Year's Eve period And then there's
Speaker 1: a couple more, but you get the idea. This is
Speaker 1: I mean, this is This is one of those things
Speaker 1: that it reminds me of the Lindsay Ellis did a
Speaker 1: video on Cats and like the sorts of movies that
Speaker 1: critics come together to just really take a gigantic dump
Speaker 1: on as as a as a professional exercise. However, this
Speaker 1: movie does deserve it. It's way more than Cats did
Speaker 1: because Cats was good. Uh, this movie is is really bad. Um.
Speaker 1: Oh another There's just so many This movie is just
Speaker 1: a list of moments. There's also scenes that seem like
Speaker 1: they're interrupted by another scene and then the previous scene
Speaker 1: just starts against Yes, I have I made a note
Speaker 1: of a few of those. They keep cutting too A
Speaker 1: montage that they just they should just let the montage
Speaker 1: play out, but Zecca Fron is taking Michelle Peiffer around
Speaker 1: New York City ever heard of it to like check
Speaker 1: off her New Year's resolutions from the previous year, and
Speaker 1: instead of again, instead of letting the whole montage play out,
Speaker 1: they just keep like dispersing little little bits of it
Speaker 1: throughout the movie, and it's like, this is so jarring
Speaker 1: and weird. And then they cut back to a scene
Speaker 1: that they had already, like the Katherine Heigel storyline, and
Speaker 1: it's like, just let one of these moments breathe for
Speaker 1: five seconds cut away. It's that's yeah, that that was
Speaker 1: the I thought the most agreed just went to where
Speaker 1: they cut out of the middle of a scene of
Speaker 1: Katherine Heigel and it's not John, it's not John bon Jovi.
Speaker 1: It's John bon Jensen, Jensen, Bun Jensen Jensen. Uh, but
Speaker 1: they cut out of the middle of it. And then
Speaker 1: it's like the weirdest part of most of that like
Speaker 1: thing that whole montage is that it's clear that it's
Speaker 1: just zach Efron doing a d R over b roll
Speaker 1: that they're not even there for there's like they cut
Speaker 1: to like just be roll of a water taxi and
Speaker 1: then you hear Zack got Frond saying and go in
Speaker 1: a taxi in New York with no traffic check, and
Speaker 1: you're like, so much of these scenes are a d
Speaker 1: r um. It's I had I had fun. I will
Speaker 1: say I was so frustrated because I like, I feel
Speaker 1: like I had to, like for a horrible movie, you
Speaker 1: have to really pay close attention to what's like. It
Speaker 1: took me a really long time because I had to
Speaker 1: keep pausing and because things keep happening, and you're like,
Speaker 1: wait a second, there, wait a second, why did they
Speaker 1: just take Hillary Swaying to the maternity ward was why
Speaker 1: is that happening there? Why is she in a room
Speaker 1: full of babies? And then it's over so fast and
Speaker 1: then you forget right away? How are you so normally?
Speaker 1: I watched the movie twice. I think normally you watch
Speaker 1: whatever movie we'recovering once. We both had to watch it
Speaker 1: an extra time, so I watched it three times. You
Speaker 1: watched it twice just because I also knew I wasn't
Speaker 1: going to retain it from the night to the morning,
Speaker 1: which is sad, and that is the mark of a
Speaker 1: really bad and really poorly written movie. Its like none
Speaker 1: of it sticks with you, and it's so jarring, and
Speaker 1: it like just gives you so much whiplash that you
Speaker 1: cannot piece together any part of the narrative, Like it
Speaker 1: just washes over you. It's so oh. Another one of
Speaker 1: my favorite bad lines is at the end the Hilary
Speaker 1: Swank ludicrous storyline, I'm like, what is gosh so weird?
Speaker 1: And then at the end ludicrous is fake family shows
Speaker 1: up And I've never seen an actor make it more
Speaker 1: clear that this is not his actual family because he
Speaker 1: because he like he walks towards these like these board children,
Speaker 1: right and he's like, hello, my little rugrats, Well you're
Speaker 1: not their dad. Also, why is Ludacris a cop, like
Speaker 1: an NYPD cop and not just like a he's like
Speaker 1: a lieutenant or something. He's like really high up in
Speaker 1: the ranks. Well this is this is Through researching for
Speaker 1: this very important episode, I did find out that Ludacris
Speaker 1: and Richard Pryor were cousins. Did you know WHOA? I
Speaker 1: didn't know that he's cousins with Richard Pryor and Monica
Speaker 1: the singer. Oh what a talented family. You know it
Speaker 1: turns out it's a dynasty. Um, but I'd rather see
Speaker 1: that ensemble cast movie like about a comedian and two
Speaker 1: musicians all in like all sharing a bloodline that's more
Speaker 1: interesting than whatever drivel we get with New Year's Eve.
Speaker 1: Richard Pryor is not available, Yeah, but Ludacris was available
Speaker 1: for this movie. He was so available. But even though
Speaker 1: he could be removed from every scene and it would
Speaker 1: be no different, there was at one point truly like
Speaker 1: there and and we'll get to the treatment of black
Speaker 1: and brown characters in this movie because it is real
Speaker 1: bad but just like the most poorly written you can imagine.
Speaker 1: But there was a full like ten minutes that I
Speaker 1: was convinced. I was like, is Ludicrous actually a ghost
Speaker 1: because he's just sort of like in these scenes with
Speaker 1: Hilary Swank being like it's gonna be okay, and she
Speaker 1: never asks him really anything about himself, And I'm like,
Speaker 1: is he like a ghost of New Year's past telling
Speaker 1: her to go to Robert? Also Robert de Niro is
Speaker 1: in this Oh, I will say, for a full disclosure,
Speaker 1: I went into this movie being like, there's gonna be
Speaker 1: one storyline that I'm just not going to pay attention
Speaker 1: to at all because there are too many, and so
Speaker 1: I was like, one's gotta go, and I chose as
Speaker 1: a character to pay attention during zero of their scenes.
Speaker 1: I chose Josh de Mel. Oh I didn't pay attention
Speaker 1: to a single scene that Josh Deml was in. I
Speaker 1: know he ends up with Sarah Jessica Parker, but I
Speaker 1: wasn't paying attention to Josh de Mel. I don't want
Speaker 1: to learn. I feel like I've gotten this far in
Speaker 1: life without learning who Josh Deml is, and I like,
Speaker 1: I just don't really want to know who he is
Speaker 1: Fergie's husband question mark. I think that's the main thing
Speaker 1: you need to know about it. That's not to see that.
Speaker 1: Wouldn't have expected that, Um, I didn't. I just was like, oh,
Speaker 1: I recognized this guy, but I don't want to look
Speaker 1: at him. Um. And so I ignored his storyline, but
Speaker 1: every all the other ones I paid very close attention.
Speaker 1: I'll fill in the gaps the Josh Jamal what's his name? Josh,
Speaker 1: I have no idea, I have no don't take my
Speaker 1: word for it. I literally fast forward it through his scenes.
Speaker 1: You not having paid attention to it, will not like
Speaker 1: someone who did pay attention to it will have no
Speaker 1: better understanding of what happens in his story than someone
Speaker 1: who did not pay attention at all. So you missed
Speaker 1: truly nothing. He's Tad Hamilton's and when a date with
Speaker 1: Tad Hamilton's. Oh yeah, he's in at least one of
Speaker 1: the Transformers movies and some other stuff. Who is this man?
Speaker 1: I'm just not interested? Um, I guess yeah, let's let's see.
Speaker 1: Let's see. Yeah. I don't know how to recap this
Speaker 1: exact in the year on the most difficult recap of
Speaker 1: all time. Okay, I mean it's not unlike Cats in
Speaker 1: that a bunch of characters just keep getting introduced and
Speaker 1: introduced and introduced, and then there's no story, and then
Speaker 1: there's a climax sort of and then it's the end.
Speaker 1: So it's really similar structurally to Cats if you think
Speaker 1: about it anyway. You gotta hand it to New Year's Eve.
Speaker 1: So again, this is like an ensemblement movie in the
Speaker 1: vein of love. Actually, it's trying very hard to be
Speaker 1: love actually and not succeeding, and that is embarrassing. But um,
Speaker 1: we're in New York City. It is New Year's Eve. Day.
Speaker 1: I think there are like seven main storylines, but then
Speaker 1: a couple of them kind of morphed together by the end,
Speaker 1: so it's sort of hard in a way that goes
Speaker 1: to be like wow, but it's this, This is like
Speaker 1: they're really reaching for love actually, because some of the
Speaker 1: stories intersect there. But it's like, and it doesn't work
Speaker 1: for me in that movie either, but this one is like, huh,
Speaker 1: why would you do that? It fails, We don't care,
Speaker 1: So it's worth mentioning New York City in a way
Speaker 1: is the main character is really the protagonist of the film.
Speaker 1: It's just kind of a love letter to New York.
Speaker 1: I love the part where Robert de Niro is like, ah,
Speaker 1: that New York Air. You're like, yeah, that's disgusting, that
Speaker 1: New York Air as it smells like trash all the time.
Speaker 1: It smells like something really wet that you can identify,
Speaker 1: like awesome. Yeah. They named all the segments, uh, really
Speaker 1: boring and that did you see in the credits where
Speaker 1: they're like resolution tour, hospital Story, Maternity, Ward Jensen and
Speaker 1: Laura's story, Ellen the Mother Daughter, a Hearn party, Times Square.
Speaker 1: This is so the pinnacle of creativity if you ask me, okay,
Speaker 1: so um. The other note about this is that I'm
Speaker 1: going to use actors names instead of characters names, just
Speaker 1: for the sake of clarity, because there are truly dozens
Speaker 1: and dozens of characters, um, and most of them are
Speaker 1: played by famous people, so that'll just make everything more clear.
Speaker 1: I'm also probably gonna, like accidentally or on purpose, leave
Speaker 1: some stuff out of this recap because there's just like
Speaker 1: far too much to even talk about. But here's the gist. So.
Speaker 1: One story revolves around Hilary Swank. She is the VP
Speaker 1: of the Times Square Alliance and she is in charge
Speaker 1: of the famous ball drop at midnight, she flips a
Speaker 1: gigantic light switch and that's her whole thing. But she
Speaker 1: has vertigo, so Chris has a cop right sure. Another
Speaker 1: story revolves around Zac Efron, who is a bike courier
Speaker 1: and he really wants to do some like big epic
Speaker 1: party for New Year's Eve that night with Ashton Kutcher,
Speaker 1: his roommate. With Ashton Kutcher his roommate, Um, he drops
Speaker 1: something off a package for Michelle Peffer at her office
Speaker 1: at a record company, and that turns out to be
Speaker 1: four tickets to this very exclusive party that Zach would
Speaker 1: love to go to, but she's like, get away from me,
Speaker 1: and then she quits her shitty job with her shitty boss,
Speaker 1: John Lisco. John Litco is the only person who knows
Speaker 1: what movie he's in, and he has such a fun performance.
Speaker 1: He goes like because she works at like a record
Speaker 1: that ahearn record company, and he's like, yes, you know,
Speaker 1: it's very not bad year for music, music piracy, blah
Speaker 1: blah blah. It's like, did you just skip over some
Speaker 1: of the script. And then when she says I quit,
Speaker 1: he goes, you can't quit. It's Grammy season. I was like,
Speaker 1: this is so vague. Michelle Phifer's wig is so distracting. Really,
Speaker 1: I'm like she we were texting about this last night.
Speaker 1: But it's like everyone in this movie is playing themselves
Speaker 1: except for Michelle Pfeiffer, who is like doing this character. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and okay, here's what's really did you get this sense
Speaker 1: to when you first watched the movie and you're first
Speaker 1: introduced to her character she has seen getting off of
Speaker 1: a bus. She's holding a piece of paper. It makes
Speaker 1: it seem like this is her like first time in
Speaker 1: New York because immediately after that she almost she like
Speaker 1: goes to cross the street and then almost gets hit
Speaker 1: by a cab and then has to like twirl around
Speaker 1: and then Pratt falls into a pile of trash. But
Speaker 1: then you find out she's lived here for years, right,
Speaker 1: So I'm like, why would you set up this character
Speaker 1: that way? Like that so much reads as like she
Speaker 1: just got off the bus in New York City where
Speaker 1: she's never been before, and she doesn't know how to
Speaker 1: cross the street or she doesn't know how to like
Speaker 1: navigate through the city. That's like a trope. Like you
Speaker 1: you see that shot and you're like, oh, I know
Speaker 1: what's happening, But then they make it they twisted for
Speaker 1: no reason. It's so weird. Like the way that this
Speaker 1: character is written is just like I don't even know
Speaker 1: if it's sexisty, I know, it makes no sense. I know,
Speaker 1: like I I guess it is sexist, but it's so
Speaker 1: nonsensical that you're just like, what were they trying to do?
Speaker 1: Even like she doesn't seem to know what her job is,
Speaker 1: or like she she doesn't I don't know what her
Speaker 1: job is, but she also doesn't know what her job is.
Speaker 1: Zach Efron comes to deliver her the mail every day,
Speaker 1: but he says he's a bike courier, not a male man.
Speaker 1: And then he says, I've seen you every I've brought
Speaker 1: you a package every day this year, and you've never
Speaker 1: looked at me, which is like, uh, if Zach Effron
Speaker 1: delivered me a package every day, I would like no,
Speaker 1: you know, and not look at anything else. I would
Speaker 1: be thinking about him constantly. And then she's invited to
Speaker 1: like this cool party, this like big record label party,
Speaker 1: the record label she is currently working at. And then
Speaker 1: he's like, oh wow, that's a really cool party and
Speaker 1: she's like, really, what is it. I'm like, you work here,
Speaker 1: what are you talking about? If it truly? I like that?
Speaker 1: And finally I like that Zach Efron's character's name is Paul. Paul.
Speaker 1: Here's a whole there's that whole thing where he sings
Speaker 1: that little song he goes, give all the chance to
Speaker 1: show you what I can do. It's like, what if
Speaker 1: his character's name isn't Paul? And he was just kind
Speaker 1: of guessing, Oh, funny, Sorry, this is a disaster. I know. Well,
Speaker 1: the record company that Michelle Peiffer works at is the
Speaker 1: same card company that is owned by Josh Dummel's character's
Speaker 1: mother and his storyline. His storyline is that he is
Speaker 1: trying to make his way to New York from Connecticut,
Speaker 1: where he like was just the witness of its friend's
Speaker 1: wedding or something on the morning of New Year's Eve. Sure, yeah,
Speaker 1: people have weddings then not absolutely made no assent, Like
Speaker 1: I just like, who are these people? Okay, we just
Speaker 1: need to get him. We haven't even gotten to Jessica
Speaker 1: Beale's unvaccinated fetus unbelievable. She an anti vaxer, big time
Speaker 1: anti vaxer. Very weird seeing her play a pregnant lady
Speaker 1: because you're like, this kid is in for a world
Speaker 1: of heart horrifying. She's bad. Well, Josh Jamel is trying
Speaker 1: to get to New York because he is giving a
Speaker 1: speech at an event which turns out to be the
Speaker 1: party that Zeke Efron is trying to go to, and
Speaker 1: he's also considering meeting up with a woman who he
Speaker 1: met last New Year's Eve, so that's his setup. Um
Speaker 1: onto zac Efron's roommate, Ashton Kutcher. He hates New Year's Eve.
Speaker 1: He's a grinch about New Year's here re arranges the
Speaker 1: sign this is happy New Year's even makes it say
Speaker 1: crappy New Year's Eve? Where did those letters come from?
Speaker 1: Where did the scene in the art come from? How
Speaker 1: did you get that? This is the worst written movie
Speaker 1: of all time? More like crappy New Year's Eve? Ashton
Speaker 1: Kutcher is so bad. I mean he's so bad and
Speaker 1: really honestly most movies. Um, but have you ever seen jobs,
Speaker 1: Steve Jobs? You've seen jobs there? Well? There there are
Speaker 1: a few moments in the elevator where he's channeling jobs.
Speaker 1: When he goes an illustrator, You're like, oh, that's like
Speaker 1: he's prepping for jobs anyway. Sorry, he doesn't want to
Speaker 1: do anything to celebrate New Year's Eve, and he's on
Speaker 1: his way to like throw out a bunch of New
Speaker 1: Year's decorations, but oh no, he gets stuck in his
Speaker 1: apartment buildings elevator with Leah Michelle. Is that how you
Speaker 1: say her name? William Michelle? Yeah, so we have in
Speaker 1: this storyline, we have, um, Leah Michelle, a confirmed racist,
Speaker 1: and Ashton Kutcher, an early investor in Uber and the
Speaker 1: worst actor of all time. And we're supposed to be
Speaker 1: like you should kiss and I'm like I need to
Speaker 1: get out of these scenes as quickly as possible. Uh So,
Speaker 1: Lea Michelle is on her way to be a backup
Speaker 1: singer for Jon bon Jovi a k A. Jensen bon Jensen,
Speaker 1: and he is playing the like televised Times Square Ball
Speaker 1: Drop Concert like Ryan Seacrest hosted, Blah blah blah that
Speaker 1: whole thing. He has a romantic history with Katherine Heigel,
Speaker 1: who is catering the Big A Hearn Records after party.
Speaker 1: That's with her co workers Russell Peters and Sophia Vergara. Yes,
Speaker 1: then we meet Sarah Michelle Geller. She wants to spend
Speaker 1: the evening with her daughter, Abigail Treslin. Sorry, you mean
Speaker 1: Sarah Jessica Parker. What did I say, Sarah Michelle Geller.
Speaker 1: I keep doing that and I literally named Sarah. It
Speaker 1: makes sense, that makes it. Meanwhile, Sarah Jessica Parker. I
Speaker 1: even have that written down and I still said the
Speaker 1: wrong thing. Okay. It took me a second to be like, wait,
Speaker 1: who is it? Then I couldn't remember Sarah Michelle Geller's
Speaker 1: Sarah Jessica Parker. Okay, we have to leave this in
Speaker 1: Sarah Jessica Parker wants to spend the evening with her daughter,
Speaker 1: Abigail Breslin, but Abigail is trying to go to Times
Speaker 1: Square with her friends and she wants to kiss her
Speaker 1: crush at midnight. Yeah. She also lifts her shirt in
Speaker 1: the middle of a train station in their first seen
Speaker 1: because reasons. I was horrified to see that. It is
Speaker 1: so weird. She's fifteen in this movie, and um, why
Speaker 1: do that it? It doesn't make sense for a character
Speaker 1: to do. It doesn't make sense for Gary Marshall to
Speaker 1: tell a child to do it doesn't even make sense
Speaker 1: for her character. She's not kind of like her character
Speaker 1: isn't like wooho, look at me, Like she's not an exhibitionist.
Speaker 1: He nothing about it. It makes any sense tracks And
Speaker 1: on top of that, it's like, yeah, why is a
Speaker 1: child lifting up her shirt and exposing her bra in public?
Speaker 1: And why is her mom not reacting to that? She
Speaker 1: her mom, well, her mom does say this isn't girls
Speaker 1: gone wild? And she like runs over to like she
Speaker 1: runs over to like cover her up, and I've seen
Speaker 1: that does tragically pass the Bechtel test. I'm just realizing
Speaker 1: that Leah Michelle's character was named Elise. Yeah, it's so weird.
Speaker 1: It's like some characters get full names in this movie,
Speaker 1: other characters don't. Like zac Efron is only known as
Speaker 1: Paul Um, but Michelle Peiffer is constantly referred to as
Speaker 1: Ingrid Withers, like her full name all the time, like
Speaker 1: why why, which I feel like it is, like, hey, audience,
Speaker 1: in case you didn't know, this is a character who
Speaker 1: is far far older than zac Efron. See she has
Speaker 1: an old person name Ingrid Withers, whereas he is young
Speaker 1: and cool, and therefore he is Paul. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm not sure rooting for them. So that's Sarah Jessica Parker,
Speaker 1: not Sarah Michelle Geller. So that's her storyline with Abigail Breslin.
Speaker 1: Then we cut to a hospital where Robert de Niro
Speaker 1: is dying. Halle Berry is a nurse who tends to
Speaker 1: him his nurse, his nurse who he thinks is his
Speaker 1: wife sometimes um. Yes. His dying wish is to see
Speaker 1: the ball drop in Times Square one last time with
Speaker 1: his own eyes. He wants to go up on the roof,
Speaker 1: but his doctor Carrie and then I'm going to have
Speaker 1: like a you and McGregor moment here because I don't
Speaker 1: know how to say his last name. He's the guy
Speaker 1: from what could be Princess Bride, Princess Bride guy. This okay,
Speaker 1: This whole thing with Robert de Niro is so vague.
Speaker 1: On the second watch, I was like, maybe I will
Speaker 1: figure out what is going on here. It seems like
Speaker 1: he is in the late stages of cancer. He has
Speaker 1: stopped refusing or he has started to refuse treatment, which
Speaker 1: does happen. But then he's like, I didn't. Do you
Speaker 1: think I came here because the hospital is good. No,
Speaker 1: I came here because I want to get on the
Speaker 1: roof of this hospital. And you're like huh, And then
Speaker 1: he keeps saying. It was like, on my second watch,
Speaker 1: I was racking up because his whole thing is he's like,
Speaker 1: just take me up on the roof so I can die,
Speaker 1: and it's this whole thing. And then when everyone's like
Speaker 1: why why do you want to why why? And he's
Speaker 1: like I'm an asshole or he's like I've been I've
Speaker 1: made so many bad choices. But he never says what
Speaker 1: any of those choices are. No one ever do we
Speaker 1: even did I miss something? Does he say what he
Speaker 1: did that was bad because he keeps being like, I'm
Speaker 1: an ass, I made so many mistakes and you're like,
Speaker 1: were you like fracking? Like what are you doing that
Speaker 1: is so bad that you want to die today? Like
Speaker 1: it's just so weird. Um. I don't think they specify.
Speaker 1: My impression was that he was just sort of like
Speaker 1: an absentee father and husband kind of person. It's the
Speaker 1: way he was talking made it sound like he had
Speaker 1: done something really or some like because if because like
Speaker 1: most maybe as a generalization, but like most parents who
Speaker 1: worked a lot aren't like I need to die right
Speaker 1: now because I feel bad that I had to work.
Speaker 1: Like it sounds like he did something bad. It sounds
Speaker 1: like he really fucked you. And I kind of him
Speaker 1: curious as to like what he did, because he's clearly
Speaker 1: racked with gilt over something. Right, But don't worry, he'll
Speaker 1: get a redemption arc because it's a holiday season movie.
Speaker 1: Maybe he was like Henry Kissinger's assistant or something like
Speaker 1: like something this man did something really bad. Otherwise he
Speaker 1: would not be telling anyone who will listen that he
Speaker 1: was a bad person and needs to die right now.
Speaker 1: I don't know, Well, something's going on meanwhile at the
Speaker 1: same hospital question mark Sarah Paulson, Oh yeah, I didn't
Speaker 1: even think of that. I think it's the same one,
Speaker 1: but I'm not totally sure. Um, Sarah Paulson and Jessica
Speaker 1: Biel are both extremely gregnant. And the thing with this
Speaker 1: hospital is that if you are the first person to
Speaker 1: give birth on New Year's Day, that family wins dollars
Speaker 1: from that hospital. And like, huh, is that is that
Speaker 1: a thing that happened? Maybe I don't know, um, but
Speaker 1: they are both vying for this grand and Jessica Biale
Speaker 1: is married to Seth Meyers. Sure right. There's also it's
Speaker 1: like a good like there's not one Like I would say,
Speaker 1: I would argue that if I had to choose a
Speaker 1: pairing and none of the pairing seth chemistry. But I
Speaker 1: had to be like, who has the most chemistry, I
Speaker 1: would honestly probably say Zach Effron and Michelle Pfeiffer. And
Speaker 1: that's not a compliment, like they don't have a lot
Speaker 1: of chemistry, but everyone else is just like they're just
Speaker 1: saying lines near each other, like I feel like everyone's
Speaker 1: missing each other's eyeline, And I mean and I feel like, yeah,
Speaker 1: that my my two bottom couples are definitely Seth Meyers
Speaker 1: and Jessica Beale horrible and who wait, keep losing track
Speaker 1: of who is even where? Oh? Aston Catcher and Lea
Speaker 1: Michelle those are my bottom right. I truly could not
Speaker 1: track the logic of that relationship. And then Sarah Paulson
Speaker 1: is married to I know is married to Till Schweiger,
Speaker 1: who I wrote down in my notes brilliantly. But he
Speaker 1: looks like he should be the villain of a National
Speaker 1: Treasure movie. So oh, he definitely does. Wow. I did
Speaker 1: not know who this man is. He is that bad.
Speaker 1: I have no idea who is. He's a German actor
Speaker 1: who's in some American cinema, but he's also in a
Speaker 1: lot of German films. Um, yeah, I recognize him, but
Speaker 1: I don't. I couldn't. I like had to look up
Speaker 1: his name. He I didn't like his character. His character
Speaker 1: was really aggressive. He also like runs a charm school. Randomly, like,
Speaker 1: why do we learn what his job is? It has
Speaker 1: nothing to do with anything. I did not. I didn't
Speaker 1: catch on the first one, and then the second one.
Speaker 1: I was like, why would you add this detail? The Yeah,
Speaker 1: he runs a charm school, which is like, um, I guess,
Speaker 1: but also he's not very charming, so I don't know,
Speaker 1: like what my my, I think one of my top
Speaker 1: worst moments of the movie is when so like it
Speaker 1: becomes this weird masculine race to who can get their
Speaker 1: wives water to break the fastest, which is first of all,
Speaker 1: a really gross premise for a vignyet and so it's
Speaker 1: it's like Till Schweiger and Seth Meyers being like, my
Speaker 1: wife's gonna water break any minute, and I'm making her
Speaker 1: eat an chovies and You're like, this is so gross.
Speaker 1: And then Sarah Paulson goes up to tell Schweiger and
Speaker 1: like apologizes to him because her water hasn't broken yet.
Speaker 1: I'm like, that's so bleak. She's like, I'm sorry, honey.
Speaker 1: I don't think we're going to get the money because
Speaker 1: I couldn't induce labor on command. Like, also, Sarah Paulson,
Speaker 1: did you feel I felt that Sarah Paulson's pregnancy looked
Speaker 1: extra fake, like way faker than Jessica Bale's. I don't
Speaker 1: know what, like, but Sarah pauls it couldn't have been
Speaker 1: clear to me that they just like velcrode something on
Speaker 1: it just like stuffed with lumpy pillow up into her shirt,
Speaker 1: Like why did she get a worse did they only
Speaker 1: have two? And then Jessica bials like I get the
Speaker 1: good one. I don't know. Sarah Paulson's looked super fake.
Speaker 1: Well I'm guessing like fifty of the budget went to
Speaker 1: paying bon Jovi, so I don't know shot budgensons. I
Speaker 1: can't get over it. Yeah, so yeah, she plays this
Speaker 1: is like early. I was trying to figure out is
Speaker 1: this um oh oh this wait, okay, I just learned
Speaker 1: something interesting. Oh please tell me. Sarah Paulson and Cherry
Speaker 1: Jones were together from two thousand four to two thousand nine,
Speaker 1: meaning that they were recent x's at the time of
Speaker 1: this movie. I don't know. That has nothing to do
Speaker 1: with anything. I just didn't know that. I was trying
Speaker 1: to figure out if this if this movie came out
Speaker 1: when Sarah Paulson was famous, or if this was a
Speaker 1: movie that she did, like right before she got famous,
Speaker 1: because she got famous doing like American Horror Story and stuff.
Speaker 1: But I don't know when that was. I feel like
Speaker 1: this was either right around then the cusp of them,
Speaker 1: or just like right before that, right it had to,
Speaker 1: because it's like there's some people it's it's really hard
Speaker 1: to because like these movies are so in the moment
Speaker 1: that it's kind of some people are bigger stars than
Speaker 1: they used to be, and then other people are presented
Speaker 1: as huge stars and now they're kind of not and
Speaker 1: so it's just very jarring, Like it's very much a
Speaker 1: time capsule of this is like peek Lea Michelle when now,
Speaker 1: like everyone this was like, so, I think we were
Speaker 1: supposed to be excited about that Katherine Heigel. It's always
Speaker 1: weird to be like and now it's Katherine Heigel and
Speaker 1: everyone was like, so what you know, but an other
Speaker 1: person who is who has ended up, you know, being
Speaker 1: exposed as as a villainous person. Oh no, what did
Speaker 1: she do? She was accused of a bunch of similar
Speaker 1: to Lea Michelle, a bunch of racist micro aggressions on
Speaker 1: the set of Gray's Anatomy, much like Lea Michelle did
Speaker 1: on Glee. So, um, yeah, I guess my apologist those people. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: so that is the setup for all of these storylines.
Speaker 1: Let's take a quick break and then we'll come back
Speaker 1: and see what happens next and we're back, all right,
Speaker 1: So here are the stories that unfold. I guess um,
Speaker 1: the pregnant women start to try to induce labor. I
Speaker 1: hate this scene with Jessica Bielle and the anchovy I'm
Speaker 1: all right, I just can't get over it, so nastysty
Speaker 1: bon Jovi, meanwhile, is trying to win back Katherine Heigel
Speaker 1: after bailing on their engagement last year, which we learn
Speaker 1: in very expository dialogue. It's so okay. That made me
Speaker 1: laugh so much because there he John bon Jensen is
Speaker 1: such a disaster in this Like he keeps wandering around
Speaker 1: being like I don't understand. Why won't you give me
Speaker 1: another chance? And then Sophia for Car is like, well
Speaker 1: what did you do? He's like, well, I proposed to
Speaker 1: her and then I immediately disappeared last year. And I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: of course she hates you. What are you talking? Rights like,
Speaker 1: I don't understand. He's like, she also two years old.
Speaker 1: I'm like, how could you not understand? She? Katherine Heigel
Speaker 1: is like I didn't even get to cook you one
Speaker 1: meal in our apartment together, and it's like women cooking,
Speaker 1: Like why would that be the thing? She says a chef,
Speaker 1: but yeah, she's she's like a fancy chef. But even
Speaker 1: so like that whole like, I mean, talk about two
Speaker 1: people that have no chemistry. Chemistry. Jon bon Jensen is
Speaker 1: struggling just to like seem like he is acting like
Speaker 1: he cannot act and he's trying so hard, and he's
Speaker 1: just something about the way he enters scenes I found
Speaker 1: very jarring and clear that he wasn't an actor, because
Speaker 1: he just seems like he's wandering into like a kitchen
Speaker 1: and you're like, get out, what are you doing in here?
Speaker 1: Growth There's a similar phenomenon happening with Ludicros, where like
Speaker 1: suddenly he just like swivels around in a chair and
Speaker 1: he's like Hi, That's why I thought there, Yeah, the
Speaker 1: musicians in this movie are really clearly musicians and not
Speaker 1: not actors. I mean, Ludicrous is being done a disservice.
Speaker 1: Everyone's being done a disservice, but Ludacris is being done
Speaker 1: an extra disservice. But he is like just kind of
Speaker 1: all of a sudden there he's just all He's just
Speaker 1: like Hilary Swank is my best friend, and she's afraid
Speaker 1: of heights, and as we know, I'm gonna I just
Speaker 1: the fact that he has a cop pick Hillary Swank up,
Speaker 1: and it's like, I love my friend and this is
Speaker 1: how I help her. I have my coworker pick her up.
Speaker 1: And you're just like, I hate this friends. Stop makes
Speaker 1: no sense. Um okay. Meanwhile, Abigail Breslin sneaks out of
Speaker 1: her apartment, and that makes it sound like she has
Speaker 1: her own apartment. She sneaks out of the apartment that
Speaker 1: she lives in with her mom, whose name is either
Speaker 1: Sarah Michelle Gallery or Sarah Jessica Parker. We don't know
Speaker 1: our character name, and we're not going to look it up.
Speaker 1: We simply don't care. She sneaks out and goes to
Speaker 1: Times Square and then her mom like tries to chase
Speaker 1: after her and figure out where she's gone. Meanwhile, Josh
Speaker 1: Dummel crashes his car and then has to hit your
Speaker 1: ride in an RV with a pastor and either the
Speaker 1: pastor or the pastor's his wife, horny dad making very
Speaker 1: gross comments the whole way. Um. Like, then, back in
Speaker 1: New York City, Robert de Niro is like expressing all
Speaker 1: of his regrets about not being a better person. It's
Speaker 1: all very vague. We're like, what did you do? I
Speaker 1: think he like he has to be like working high
Speaker 1: up in the government, and like I was gonna say,
Speaker 1: like he was he like the president of some like
Speaker 1: um could be Wall Street. Maybe they're in New York.
Speaker 1: I just feel like Robert de niro characters don't feel
Speaker 1: guilty over like nothing, you know, like he plays very
Speaker 1: hardened characters. Right, his character did something really bad. Maybe
Speaker 1: maybe he's playing the same character that he did in
Speaker 1: Taxi Driver and his character and Taxi Driver does some
Speaker 1: very fucked up stuff. That's the Canada. He's on his
Speaker 1: death bed being like I just want to see the
Speaker 1: ball drop with my daughter. Hilary Swank. So weird. The twist.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, by the way, spoiler alert the twist, Hilary
Speaker 1: Swank is his daughter. Yeah, what does he die? At
Speaker 1: the end? He does, I'm pretty sure because she's like
Speaker 1: holding his like personal items, as if he passed away.
Speaker 1: That is so confusing because on the first I realized
Speaker 1: at the end of my first viewing, I'm like, I
Speaker 1: don't even know if he lived. At the end, no,
Speaker 1: I think he dies and then it's like the stroke
Speaker 1: of midnight or something like did he die on the roof,
Speaker 1: because that was the other thing. I'm like, Hallie Berry
Speaker 1: is about to lose her job. She lets Hilary Swank
Speaker 1: like abduct her dying father to bring him to the roof.
Speaker 1: And then Hallie Berry is like, I know, it's all good.
Speaker 1: She's like, I'm too busy. I skyping with common who's
Speaker 1: overseas in the military, who was nominated for an award
Speaker 1: for that yet I saw that, um, But so Hallie
Speaker 1: Berry is like whatever, but then yeah, it seems like
Speaker 1: maybe he possibly died on the roof. And then she
Speaker 1: had to like, what bring her father's right, and then
Speaker 1: just be like verd of all, Hillary's might be accused
Speaker 1: of murder if there is not if there is not
Speaker 1: good video surveillance of like what exactly happened, She's in
Speaker 1: a lot of trouble, true. But instead she's just pulled
Speaker 1: into a room full of infants and they're like, look
Speaker 1: at these Do you feel better? And she's like, yes, right,
Speaker 1: it's like her dad died, but now she's looking at newborn's.
Speaker 1: It's the circle of life. Some people die, some people
Speaker 1: are born. Wow. I yeah. And also I felt like
Speaker 1: there was just a weird element of and maybe I'm
Speaker 1: like overthinking a little bit, but I'm like, oh, nothing
Speaker 1: cheers up a woman like a room full of babies,
Speaker 1: because women be wanting babies really bad. There's so many
Speaker 1: like stereotypes, and we'll talk about them, but like women
Speaker 1: stereotyped in a particular way happens countless times in this movie. Yeah, um, okay,
Speaker 1: so what happens nex um zac Efron. He is taking
Speaker 1: Michelle Cifer all around the city to check off her
Speaker 1: New Year's resolutions. And then Ryan Seacrest as himself. Funny,
Speaker 1: He's one of the few celebrities in the movie who
Speaker 1: is actually playing himself. It's so funny. So like half
Speaker 1: of this cast has been canceled since this movie came out,
Speaker 1: Like it's like astounding. And then on top of that,
Speaker 1: Michael Bloomberg comes out and you're like shocking. Um. So
Speaker 1: Ryan Seacrest is like, all right, everyone, it's six pm
Speaker 1: in Times Square. Let's raise the ball so that we
Speaker 1: can drop it at midnight. So they go to raise it,
Speaker 1: but oh no, it's broken and it won't go up.
Speaker 1: So then Hilary Swain has to call someone named Kaminski,
Speaker 1: who turns out to be Eldo died and you're like, oh,
Speaker 1: I want so much better for him than this caricature
Speaker 1: of a of a character. Yeah, so Hector Elisondo shows
Speaker 1: up to fix the ball, and then Hilary Swank gives
Speaker 1: this like what is meant to be a moving speech
Speaker 1: that is televised across the entire nation. For some reason,
Speaker 1: everyone sees it in Times Square. At Times Square is
Speaker 1: silent captivated by Hillary Swank's speech. I also let there's
Speaker 1: so many like details of this movie, like in in
Speaker 1: Times Square specifically where there's like a huge poster for
Speaker 1: Sherlock Holmes Trunk of Secrets or whatever. The fun The
Speaker 1: second movie was starring Robert Downey. Oh, sorry, Sherlock Holmes
Speaker 1: A Game of Shadow. I was gonna call a Book
Speaker 1: of Shadows, but I think that might be the National Treasures.
Speaker 1: It is a Game of Shadows, Trunk of Secrets. It
Speaker 1: was all it's all the same, but they're they're like
Speaker 1: heavily advertising an extremely Sherlock Holmes A movie is actually
Speaker 1: what it's called disaster. Okay, so everyone sees this speech. Meanwhile,
Speaker 1: Leah Michelle and Ashton Kutcher have started to bond. They're
Speaker 1: about to kiss, but then the elevator starts back up
Speaker 1: again and she has to leave to go sting for
Speaker 1: Jensen bon Jensen. Also he's so rude to her. She
Speaker 1: she like, he's like, what are you a groupie? And like, uh,
Speaker 1: have some respects, sir. She's John Bond, Jensen's backup singer,
Speaker 1: like this is the worst of me. And he's like,
Speaker 1: I'm an illustrator, Like I did not want them to kiss.
Speaker 1: I was thrilled they didn't get to kiss, but they
Speaker 1: do later I know. Well. And there's also like it
Speaker 1: goes without like you can tell by looking at the
Speaker 1: poster and the year this movie came out that there's
Speaker 1: just like no consent in the entire people just like
Speaker 1: launching each other at each other's heads. It's gross to
Speaker 1: look at. I have a list of all the like
Speaker 1: the sexual harassment and sexual misconduct that happens in the movie.
Speaker 1: It's horror genuinely nasty. Yeah, okay. So meanwhile, zac Efron
Speaker 1: is really close to getting his tickets to this exclusive party,
Speaker 1: but then Michelle Phiffer overhears him calling her pathetic because
Speaker 1: he's screaming in an open room with three feet away
Speaker 1: from her. He's like, hello, I'm with this lady. She's
Speaker 1: fucking pathetic. And then she's like I She's like, I'm
Speaker 1: right here. I heard that. And he's like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. What are you doing? What do you
Speaker 1: think was going to happen? So she's like, I don't
Speaker 1: want to do this anymore, and he thinks that he
Speaker 1: blew it. But then he's like, I'm so sorry. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna make this up to you and I'm going to
Speaker 1: amaze you and and all of your resolutions are gonna
Speaker 1: come true and blah blah blah, all this stuff. Okay,
Speaker 1: the scene where he you know, the one I'm talking about.
Speaker 1: The scene where all of a sudden Michelle Phifer is
Speaker 1: in like Spider Man turn off the dark, like like
Speaker 1: they're just flinging her around the stage. It was so
Speaker 1: scary and it like made my eyes hurt to look at. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was so like However, that was edited. I don't
Speaker 1: know if Michelle Peiffer was like, um, I'm not actually
Speaker 1: going to do that. You have to like green screening.
Speaker 1: But it like hurt my eyes to look at, and
Speaker 1: it hurt my head to think about, like why are
Speaker 1: they doing this? Why why, But it was also like
Speaker 1: it just felt so because her thing was like I
Speaker 1: need to be amazed. That was like her resolution. Her
Speaker 1: list is fucking ridiculous. It's so basic. It's like such
Speaker 1: basic white woman ship, and I'm just like, are you
Speaker 1: It makes just that character is so and also I
Speaker 1: feel like there is like some ages of met play
Speaker 1: and the way that character is written, because they're like
Speaker 1: like I feel like there is this whole element of like,
Speaker 1: look at this, like you are supposed to think that
Speaker 1: she's pathetic a little bit, oh yeah, but then we're like,
Speaker 1: oh wait, Paul thinks she's cool, so I guess she's cool.
Speaker 1: Like you're just like he validates her, and that whole
Speaker 1: I mean, none of these stories makes sense. But she's
Speaker 1: just like call she rents Paul for a day, which
Speaker 1: is not how bike couriers work. Uh, you can't just
Speaker 1: rent a bike courier for a day. But also he
Speaker 1: is already doing the work of a mailman, so we
Speaker 1: don't even know what's going on. He also has two bikes.
Speaker 1: He has a regular bicycle and then he also has
Speaker 1: like a moped scooter thing. This is why I'm very
Speaker 1: glad I watched this movie twice because I'm like, Wow,
Speaker 1: he seems to have a lot of money for someone
Speaker 1: who says that he does not have any money, because
Speaker 1: he has a gigantic apartment that he shares with Ashton Kutcher.
Speaker 1: They live in like a loft or something, multiple bikes.
Speaker 1: Like he's just like he's kind of like living. He's
Speaker 1: he must be from money or something. Well, did you
Speaker 1: notice this Whenever he goes into like the record company
Speaker 1: to deliver the initial package to Michelle Peiffer, He's just
Speaker 1: like seen going into their like kitchen and like other
Speaker 1: spaces like rifling through stuff and stealing it. He steals
Speaker 1: a bunch of CDs, and he like steals a bunch
Speaker 1: of like coffee creamer and stuff. I don't know what
Speaker 1: this guy's deal is at. I think we're supposed to
Speaker 1: think he's like scrappy in his twenties and like doesn't
Speaker 1: have a lot of money, but like that doesn't make sense.
Speaker 1: And also it's like that's sort of like I don't know.
Speaker 1: It seems like Gary Marshall wants you to believe like, oh,
Speaker 1: New York gets magical and like, you know, Zachary, but
Speaker 1: I don't understand how Paul has all these connections. They're like,
Speaker 1: he's like, I'm a bike career, therefore I can rig
Speaker 1: you up in the theater whenever I want. You're just like, no,
Speaker 1: you can't. Or like when he goes he opened that
Speaker 1: really jarring shot where he opens up a storage container
Speaker 1: and there's a luxury spaw inside, and it was like
Speaker 1: here here we are in Bali and you're like Meanwhile,
Speaker 1: Michelle Pifer is like, she's like, ah, we're in Brooklyn,
Speaker 1: the scariest neighborhood. I hate it here. It's so dangerous Brooklyn.
Speaker 1: And it's just like shut that whole her list. It
Speaker 1: was really funny too. I was like, wow, should we
Speaker 1: try to pull that list off next year? One like
Speaker 1: Save a Life? Like ridiculous, it's ludicrous, it's officer ludicrous,
Speaker 1: it's Lieutenant Ludacris. Do you okay? So then we find
Speaker 1: out that Hillary Swank is like planning to go meet
Speaker 1: up with someone that night, and it's set up for
Speaker 1: us to think that Hillary Swank and Josh Jumel are
Speaker 1: like meeting up with each other, but then it's not,
Speaker 1: because Hillary goes and meets up with her dad, Robert
Speaker 1: de Niro and She takes him up to the roof
Speaker 1: where he immediately dies. Where he dies, then the ball drops. Wow,
Speaker 1: Happy New Year. Jessica Bale's in labor. Yes, the Gragnant
Speaker 1: women are giving birth. Leah Michelle is singing old lang sign.
Speaker 1: Zac Efron shows up and hisses Michelle's life for surprise
Speaker 1: kisses her mind you launches himself at her. The god
Speaker 1: some of the grossest no consent like surprise kisses in
Speaker 1: the whole film canon here. I also think it's worth mentioning.
Speaker 1: Ashton Kutcher shows up to be like good luckily and Michelle,
Speaker 1: I'm your like loser boyfriend now the prize and she's
Speaker 1: like okay, but he brings this thing that I only
Speaker 1: recently learned about from a YouTube channel I watched. But like,
Speaker 1: he brings her this really weird dated item that's like
Speaker 1: a balanced bracelet that are like do you remember those
Speaker 1: They They were a thing ten years ago. I didn't
Speaker 1: know they existed. But he it looks like a live
Speaker 1: strong band, but there's like a little piece of stone
Speaker 1: in it and it's some It was some bullshit scam
Speaker 1: that they did in the early two tents where they're like,
Speaker 1: oh you balance better when you wear this thirty dollar
Speaker 1: bracelet that's just plastic. I know he references that, but
Speaker 1: I thought he was just making a joke where it's
Speaker 1: like ha ha, if you don't have this cheap rubber bracelet,
Speaker 1: it might offset your balance. I didn't realize that was
Speaker 1: a real thing, like a balance brace. Tragically, that was
Speaker 1: a real thing. Yeah, paging officer ludicrous, give what's going on? God?
Speaker 1: And I mean they're obviously like funck the myp D.
Speaker 1: But then at the end where the New York cops
Speaker 1: just started kissing people, you're like, what the fuck is
Speaker 1: going on? And it's happening. Well, here comes another surprise kiss.
Speaker 1: Abigail Breslin goes and like finally finds her crush in
Speaker 1: Times Square t Austin a Disney star or an Glodeon star. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I have I have no idea who that was. He
Speaker 1: was on Wizards of Waverley Place, okay um, But this
Speaker 1: other girl grabs him in surprise, kisses him. And then
Speaker 1: Abigail Breslin sees this and she gets sad. But then
Speaker 1: the boys like, wait a minute, no, I got surprised
Speaker 1: kiss you have it all wrong. I want to kiss you,
Speaker 1: and then he surprised kisses Abigail Preslin. Just she's wearing
Speaker 1: fingerless gloves for all of this. Oh I didn't even
Speaker 1: notice that two thousand eleven she is wearing fingerless clubs.
Speaker 1: Oh there's another just quick, this is uh. Seth Meyers
Speaker 1: and Jessica Biel comment. But one of one of my
Speaker 1: one of the most baffling line exchanges in the movie
Speaker 1: for me was she's doing yoga to induce labor. She
Speaker 1: just wants dollars even though they seem to have a
Speaker 1: ton of money right to pay off. Seth Meyer's student
Speaker 1: loaned it. Oh my gosh. So yes. So this is
Speaker 1: the scene where you find out that he's a horse doctor.
Speaker 1: He's he like walks and he's like, where are you
Speaker 1: doing yoga? Like stop? And then she goes okay, and
Speaker 1: then she she says, you are going to be a
Speaker 1: great vet someday, Griff, and then he says thanks, and
Speaker 1: then he makes a long joke about like, well, what
Speaker 1: if I married a horse, that I would be married
Speaker 1: to a horse, but I'm not. I'm married to you anyways,
Speaker 1: why aren't you in labor? And I was like, what
Speaker 1: the funk is going on? Here this is he's a
Speaker 1: horse doctor. He used to pay off his horse doctor.
Speaker 1: So in that storyline of the two gregnant women, we
Speaker 1: learn what both of their husbands do for a living,
Speaker 1: but we don't want anything about the two women and
Speaker 1: the husband's jobs are ridiculous. It's a horse doctor and
Speaker 1: charms school owner. Like there we we I'm trying to think.
Speaker 1: I'm like, we know what Hillary Swank does, we know
Speaker 1: what Katherine Heigel does. I would argue, we don't know
Speaker 1: what Michelle Phiffer does. Michelle Phiffer doesn't even know what
Speaker 1: she does. That's why she's full. I think she's the
Speaker 1: assistant to John Lethgo. But it's so vague that it
Speaker 1: really could be anything. We sort of know what Sarah
Speaker 1: jess I almost said it again, Sarah Jessica Parker does,
Speaker 1: because she's like a costume signer the Rockets Nic only
Speaker 1: in New York. I guess we know what some of
Speaker 1: the characters. It's just so like. But but yeah, it
Speaker 1: seems pointed that you don't know what the two of
Speaker 1: very pregnant people do for a living. It's almost as
Speaker 1: if to say, like, well, they are mothers, so they
Speaker 1: wouldn't have a career. Pregnancy is a full time job,
Speaker 1: so weird, but yeah, he needs to pay off his
Speaker 1: Also there's that Matthew Broderick cameo or first of all,
Speaker 1: is that just like a deal that him and Sarah
Speaker 1: Jessica Parker have, like you get both of us and
Speaker 1: they're like, well, we don't want Matthew Broderick and he's like, well,
Speaker 1: write me a scene anyways. Also his name is Mr Buellerton. Oh,
Speaker 1: Ferris Buellerton's day off? Maybe what a what a mess?
Speaker 1: What a mess? Um? Also pretty cool that Sarah Jessica
Speaker 1: Parker is like, yeah, my husband needs to be in
Speaker 1: the movie, but I'm not going to kiss him. I'm
Speaker 1: going to kiss Josh. Yeah, okay, So that brings us
Speaker 1: to Josh Dummel dumal whatever. Goes to the spot where
Speaker 1: he was supposed to meet this like mystery woman who
Speaker 1: he met last year. It seems like she's not going
Speaker 1: to show up, but then she does and surprise it's
Speaker 1: Sarah Jessica Parker and we're like, we're we supposed to
Speaker 1: care about this at all? No hard to know um,
Speaker 1: And then they kiss and we're like, whoa, I guess
Speaker 1: that's the end of the movie. It's Josh Is it
Speaker 1: joshd Mall's voice over at the end of the movie,
Speaker 1: because at the end it was like I believe, So
Speaker 1: that was confusing to me. I did not catch that
Speaker 1: the first time. I was like, And then at the end,
Speaker 1: someone just starts talking, I have no idea. I wasn't
Speaker 1: sure if it was him or maybe de Niro's ghost. So,
Speaker 1: oh my god. When when they literally I mean the
Speaker 1: way that all these storylines and are so sloppy, but
Speaker 1: when Hilary Swank leaves to go see if she's like,
Speaker 1: by Ludacris, has been fun being in this movie with you,
Speaker 1: and then he's like my little rugrats and You're like, stunt,
Speaker 1: don't weird? Weird? Maybe they are. Then I was like,
Speaker 1: what if those are his actual kids and they did
Speaker 1: one of those things. It's it wasn't yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: who knows um, But I think that's the end of
Speaker 1: the movie. Then there's like this credit montage of mostly
Speaker 1: Zach Effron dancing, and then there's also bloopers, but then
Speaker 1: that's it. Did you find it really jarring in the
Speaker 1: credits where okay, it looked like the credits were like
Speaker 1: they put all the names of all the main actors,
Speaker 1: but they didn't put any of the names over the
Speaker 1: actor that they were talking. So it was I was
Speaker 1: like dying. It kept cutting like they credit like it
Speaker 1: was shots of zac Effron when they for ludicrous, it
Speaker 1: was shots of zac Efron. When they were crediting Liam Michelle.
Speaker 1: It was a shot of zac Efron. When they were
Speaker 1: crediting Jon bon Jovi, Like they put Michelle Peiffer over
Speaker 1: Sarah Jessica Parker. It was like it made that's like
Speaker 1: editing one oh one, and they fucked up cotting back
Speaker 1: to Zach Effron for everyone except for zac Efron, and
Speaker 1: that was John bon Jovi, Like this is so weird.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. Well that's the story. Let's take a
Speaker 1: quick break and we'll come back to discuss, and we're
Speaker 1: back back. I just wanted to shout out the blooper
Speaker 1: real one more time. Did you have a favorite blooper um?
Speaker 1: I mean, just because I love zach Efron so much,
Speaker 1: I was like very endeared by I think he has
Speaker 1: one or two little bloopers that gets snuck in there.
Speaker 1: He seems like he was really hamming it up. He
Speaker 1: really was oh he has, Yeah, he has one where
Speaker 1: he calls Michelle Schifer the wrong character name. Uh, and
Speaker 1: then he likes. And then there's another one where he likes.
Speaker 1: He's like talking into the phone to Ashton Kutcher and
Speaker 1: then he like does his line wrong and then he
Speaker 1: has to like kind of swivels around. He's like, oh shoot,
Speaker 1: So I liked those just because I love zac Efron.
Speaker 1: My favorite one was when Hallie Berry the Hallie Berry
Speaker 1: carry they're they're McGregor, so they're like they're walking down
Speaker 1: the hallway and Hallie Berry is saying he needs to
Speaker 1: be taken to hospice care, but she can't stop laughing. Uh,
Speaker 1: maybe made sense if you were. It seems like you
Speaker 1: had to be there, because it doesn't make sense to
Speaker 1: me why she's like, he has to go to hospice
Speaker 1: Like he's like, halle Berry read the room, Yeah you almost,
Speaker 1: and he's dying right. They should have included the context
Speaker 1: store for why she was laughing, but they don't, and
Speaker 1: then it just seems really insensitive, makes her seem really mean,
Speaker 1: like very strange. And and then of course Jessica Biel
Speaker 1: gives birth to a deep a widescreen DVD and a
Speaker 1: blue ray of Valentine's Day because this all takes place
Speaker 1: in the same expanded universe. Hilarious. I also wanted to
Speaker 1: shout out some of the cameo performances that we haven't
Speaker 1: already shouted out, such as Milana. I never ended up
Speaker 1: finding her. I was confused by the two, and I
Speaker 1: think it's partly because I don't really know what Alssa
Speaker 1: Milana looks like and I liked the same I'm suffering
Speaker 1: from the same thing. But she was one of the
Speaker 1: nurses in Robert de Niro almost called him Robert Downey Jr.
Speaker 1: God Trunk of Shadows. She's a nurse in Robert DeNiro's story.
Speaker 1: There's also um is it Yard Lee Smith? Rd Lee Smith? Oh?
Speaker 1: Wait Bart Simpson? Yes? Where is where is Bart? Or?
Speaker 1: Sorry Lisa Simpson. She's in the r V that Josh
Speaker 1: Dummel is in. Uh see why I fast forward at
Speaker 1: the Josh Dumel scenes for self care, so I don't know.
Speaker 1: She plays a very kind of trophy character where she's
Speaker 1: just like in love with the idea of love and
Speaker 1: she's just like, oh my gosh, tell me about this
Speaker 1: love story between you and this woman. I love love
Speaker 1: it sounds like season two of you. Um. There's also
Speaker 1: Nat Wolf from The Naked Brothers Band is credit it
Speaker 1: as waiter, which makes no sense to me because he
Speaker 1: would have been like sixteen, so that he plays I
Speaker 1: guess he plays a waiter. I don't know who that is,
Speaker 1: so I can't say that's okay. Carlage God, I don't
Speaker 1: think I have ever tried to say her last name
Speaker 1: out loud since the Spy Kids episode. But Carla Gugino, Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: a mom from Spy Kids, iconically, amongst other roles, is
Speaker 1: in it briefly. Briefly, she plays like a hippie doctor
Speaker 1: almost she's like an m D. But she also like
Speaker 1: does all this kind of holistic medicine approach. She's the
Speaker 1: one who pulls the DVDs out of Jessica Bale's vagina.
Speaker 1: Hilarious joke. We all love it. Um. There's also Penny
Speaker 1: Marshall is at the like record company party, and we
Speaker 1: see her being very mean to a service industry person.
Speaker 1: So that's cool. Um, let's see. Oh, Jim Belushi plays
Speaker 1: the superintendent of the building with the broken l e Vader. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and you can just tell like that whole thing that
Speaker 1: had to be just a whole day of Ashton Kutcher
Speaker 1: kissing Jim Belushi's ass in a really like in a
Speaker 1: way that must have been really embarrassing to watch, where
Speaker 1: he's like, oh my god, I love your work so much,
Speaker 1: so influential to me, and you're just like Ashton Kutcher,
Speaker 1: shut the funk up, challenge, calm down. Yeah, there's probably
Speaker 1: some other people I'm forgetting about, but those those are
Speaker 1: all the famous people, and of course Mayor Michael Bloomer
Speaker 1: and Mike Bloomberg as himself. Disaster. You hate to see it?
Speaker 1: You do? Okay, where should we start? Well? I feel
Speaker 1: like the one of the more egregious elements of this
Speaker 1: movie and movies of this genre, are how they treat
Speaker 1: non white characters. Only white characters get meaningful love arcs
Speaker 1: in this movie. I would say meaningful storylines at all.
Speaker 1: I mean, I guess so, but it's like, are any
Speaker 1: of these stories meaningful? I don't know, Like I guess
Speaker 1: complete storyline. It's like, um, because we have a few
Speaker 1: people of color in this movie, but they're all in
Speaker 1: supporting roles, mostly to support a rich white lady in
Speaker 1: dating someone or uh, well, I guess so. So Russell
Speaker 1: Peters and Sophia Rigara work with Katherine Heigel and they
Speaker 1: only exist to see what's going on with her and
Speaker 1: John bon Jensen. They don't get any meaningful storyline out
Speaker 1: of that. And then there's also Luda, Officer Luda, who
Speaker 1: is a friend of Hilary Swank and then is like, okay,
Speaker 1: like he doesn't need to be there. It's just weird
Speaker 1: that he's there at all, Like he I think we
Speaker 1: said this earlier, Like he could be written out of
Speaker 1: every scene and the movie would be kind of no different.
Speaker 1: He could also be a ghost in the movie would
Speaker 1: be no different. So that's not good writing for one
Speaker 1: of your only black actors in the movie. And then
Speaker 1: there's halle Berry in Common where halle Berry's story compared
Speaker 1: to all of like the white couples, is so depressing,
Speaker 1: like she doesn't get to go anywhere, she doesn't get
Speaker 1: to do anything. She has to just like listen to
Speaker 1: Robert de Niro'll be like, I've made so many vague mistakes.
Speaker 1: And then well, that's the thing. I wouldn't classify her
Speaker 1: storyline as being about her. She isn't in another supporting
Speaker 1: role supporting a white character, and then they do try
Speaker 1: to characterize her a little bit more, right, but that
Speaker 1: scene is like a minute, maybe it's an after I
Speaker 1: think it's like fully an afterthought, totally an afterthought. And
Speaker 1: the thing that they do to like try to characterize
Speaker 1: her further is just like introduce her in the context
Speaker 1: of like the romantic hetero relationship that she's in. So
Speaker 1: it's like, Okay, this isn't interesting or I mean, it
Speaker 1: could be interesting, but like nothing about it had been
Speaker 1: set up or really developed, and it just feels like
Speaker 1: very random and tacked on. Like I think what's what
Speaker 1: is more interesting about halle Berry's character is that she
Speaker 1: is like does not care about medical misconduct. That's pretty interesting.
Speaker 1: She's like kill Robert de Niro, cef I care, Like
Speaker 1: that's a better movie, that's a better plot. Like but yeah,
Speaker 1: it's like even they give her a partner at the
Speaker 1: last second for no ostensible reason. But even so, it's
Speaker 1: like you just see like a white couple mashing their
Speaker 1: face together in Times Square, white couple mashing their face
Speaker 1: together in Times Square, and then halle Berry has to
Speaker 1: hang out with Robert de Niro calling himself an asshole
Speaker 1: for two hours and then at the end they're like
Speaker 1: and halle Berry has a husband who's serving overseas and
Speaker 1: she's sad and you're like, fuck you, Like come on.
Speaker 1: They also make her like get changed in like a
Speaker 1: fucking broom closet, and then she has to like to
Speaker 1: zoom to zoom in another room in the hospital, like
Speaker 1: why doesn't she go home, like when we see where
Speaker 1: she lives. Like so it's it's like just everything you
Speaker 1: think it would be in terms of how this movie
Speaker 1: writes and treats their non white characters. It's aggressively says
Speaker 1: head or oh yeah. There's also with the two characters
Speaker 1: who are like in the Employe of Katherine Heigel, we
Speaker 1: have Sophia Regara who plays a character that she often plays,
Speaker 1: which is a non native speaker of English. Therefore she
Speaker 1: gets some like words and phrases wrong, and that's always
Speaker 1: played as a joke. I mean, that's like the story
Speaker 1: of modern family, isn't it. I don't know, that is
Speaker 1: very In fact, I was like she just playing that
Speaker 1: same character because it's the exact same thing. A lot
Speaker 1: of jokes are made at the expense of her not
Speaker 1: having the most fluent grasp of ish kind of thing.
Speaker 1: And she's also like oversexualized in a way that she
Speaker 1: very often is so well, which happens very frequently, Like
Speaker 1: it's just it's it's really frustrating, Like she a lot
Speaker 1: is made of her body, which is the same deal
Speaker 1: and modern family, and she's just very like dit see
Speaker 1: and oversexualized in a way that isn't just sexist. Is
Speaker 1: also like I mean, we've talked about this in past
Speaker 1: episodes before our our conversation in a Laddin kind of
Speaker 1: comes to mind of how black and brown women are
Speaker 1: so often oversexualized because tropes, and that is like kind
Speaker 1: of no exception in in this movie for Sophia Vergara. Yes,
Speaker 1: and then the other character who works for Katherine Hugel
Speaker 1: is Russell Peters is character, and he is made to
Speaker 1: do an accent which he does not have in real life. Nope,
Speaker 1: he is Canadian, He's Canadian. He has a Canadian accent. Um.
Speaker 1: This is something that a lot of South Asian actors
Speaker 1: in particular have to deal with Asian actors in general,
Speaker 1: where they are made to do an accent that they
Speaker 1: do not actually have. Usually for like comedic effect, and
Speaker 1: it's almost always racist. We just we we had our
Speaker 1: conversation about this on the Matren recently with the character
Speaker 1: I don't remember the name of the character heal from
Speaker 1: Princess Christmas Prince too, and this has been written about extensively.
Speaker 1: It's like a I don't know how much that conversation
Speaker 1: was being had in a public way in late eleven,
Speaker 1: but at this point, I mean, it's so so so
Speaker 1: agreed to us and absolutely not on the actor at all,
Speaker 1: because so many parts are written to these very racist stereotypes,
Speaker 1: and then the actor only gets so many offers for
Speaker 1: so many types of parts. Like it's just such an
Speaker 1: infuriateing cycle. Yes, Kalpen had a really insightful and frustrating
Speaker 1: Twitter threat about that that we will link in the
Speaker 1: description about the types of characters that he's been sent.
Speaker 1: And this seems like this character, Wait, what is Russell
Speaker 1: Peter's character even called in this movie, Sue neil Um,
Speaker 1: This character seems very in the South Asian stereotypes that
Speaker 1: like actors of South Asian descent who do not have
Speaker 1: accedence are constantly asked to play. Yeah. I would also
Speaker 1: recommend the documentary The problem with a Pooh. The hot
Speaker 1: comedian Hari Condobolu made which dives into this quite a bit.
Speaker 1: So it's on HBO Max for anyone who wants to
Speaker 1: watch it. Very insightful. Um. Yeah, So in general, like
Speaker 1: we can just basically sum up this movie as being
Speaker 1: like obscenely white. The only main storylines are given to
Speaker 1: white people. The only people of color are there to
Speaker 1: support the white characters who have more significant narrative arcs.
Speaker 1: Just like a very a lot of negative stereotypes right
Speaker 1: play with Um. I feel like Sophia Rigara and Russell
Speaker 1: Peters in particular, although it doesn't help that Officer Luda
Speaker 1: is with the ny p D, I don't love that.
Speaker 1: I also the shot I truly shocking at the end
Speaker 1: where New York cops are just making out with random people.
Speaker 1: I hated to see it. Well, let's talk about the
Speaker 1: sexual misconduct that takes place with any storylines. So there
Speaker 1: are many examples across many different storylines of characters harassing
Speaker 1: other characters. Or for example, Zac Efron, the moment he
Speaker 1: is introduced on screen street harasses like six different women. Yeah,
Speaker 1: within the first ten seconds of seeing his character Russell
Speaker 1: Peters to Sofia Regara, which plays into the over sexualization
Speaker 1: of her character. Um, he's like taking photos of her.
Speaker 1: She's kind of very excitedly jumping up and down, and
Speaker 1: he says, keep jumping. You're very sexy. Bouncy, bouncy, bouncy.
Speaker 1: Katherine Heigel also later sexualizes her again. Katherine Heigel is
Speaker 1: Sophia regards boss in this movie, so like to her subordinate.
Speaker 1: She's like commenting on the size of her breasts in
Speaker 1: a really inappropriate way. Russell Peters also proceeds to make
Speaker 1: several inappropriate comments to various women throughout the movie about
Speaker 1: like who they're going to kiss at midnight and other
Speaker 1: sexually suggestive things. We already talked about the whatever choice
Speaker 1: if I don't if this was in the script, or
Speaker 1: if this is something Gary Marshall decided should happen, or
Speaker 1: what exactly, But a choice was made for Abigail Breslin,
Speaker 1: who was a teenager she's fifteen child for her to
Speaker 1: lift up her shirt and flash her bra in a
Speaker 1: crowded public space for some reason. That's in the movie
Speaker 1: not just gross but also nonsense, as absolutely nonsense. Um,
Speaker 1: Jim Belushi is like, hey, Ashton Kutcher, you totally fucked
Speaker 1: Lea Michelle and the elevator right right, right right, Like
Speaker 1: that scene goes on for so long of Jim Belushi
Speaker 1: being like, you had sex with that hot lady wink
Speaker 1: wink right and you're like please, and it's like, is
Speaker 1: this I'm sorry screenwriter, Catherine, what's her day? Few game,
Speaker 1: few games? Something? Is this your idea of comedy? Which
Speaker 1: goes to show that even women can be terrible sexist screenwriters.
Speaker 1: She also wrote Valentine's Days, so the End of Yours
Speaker 1: Eve is the last like major movie that she has written,
Speaker 1: so you know, yipe swell, good riddance. And then there's
Speaker 1: also and we touched on some of these already, but
Speaker 1: there's also a number of surprise kisses where Ashton there's
Speaker 1: constantly They're constantly happening, Uh, Ashton Kutcher, surprise kisses Leah, Michelle,
Speaker 1: zach Efron's surprise kisses Michelle Pfeiffer. There's the several surprise
Speaker 1: kisses in the Abigail Breslin storyline. There's extras, surprise kissing,
Speaker 1: other extras. It's just constantly happening. It's so and it
Speaker 1: is also in addition, to this movie being horrendously racist.
Speaker 1: It is also the most hetero movie I've ever seen,
Speaker 1: just frustrating because they have I mean, it's like there,
Speaker 1: I don't know, I'm like why. It's like, you have,
Speaker 1: first of all, two queer icons in this movie, and
Speaker 1: it's like, come on, Sarah Paulson, why do I have
Speaker 1: to like anyways? But who's the other one, Cherry Jones?
Speaker 1: Oh wait, who's Jerry I don't know who Jerry Jones is.
Speaker 1: Sherry Jones is the owner of the record label, and
Speaker 1: she and Sarah Paulson used to date, but by the
Speaker 1: movie time this movie is shot, they're not dating. So
Speaker 1: you're like famining drama. They're not. They don't appear in
Speaker 1: a scene together, much like Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew
Speaker 1: Broderick even though they are married. I don't know, shrug um,
Speaker 1: but yeah, there are there are several Several of the
Speaker 1: stories revolve around a romance of some kind between Katherine
Speaker 1: Heigel and bon Jovi, Ashton Kutcher and Liam Michelle, Abigail
Speaker 1: Breslin and her crush Seth, Sarah Jessica Parker and Josh Jumal.
Speaker 1: They're all only Hilary Swank, who doesn't have a romantic storyline. Yeah,
Speaker 1: kind of, it's like Hilary Swank and then Ludacris is
Speaker 1: already married. Yeah, you find out Halle Berry has been
Speaker 1: married the whole time at the end, common the two
Speaker 1: pregnant women in hetero relationships. As everyone is, this is
Speaker 1: a New York City where only straight people live and
Speaker 1: mostly white people live, and we all love cops and
Speaker 1: we need to have a baby yesterday. Like it's messy. Um. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think that they're we we've sort of touched on this,
Speaker 1: but I think that there's definitely some ages them at
Speaker 1: play with how Michelle Peiffer's characters treated. I didn't like that.
Speaker 1: I'm all for like, you know, like I I always
Speaker 1: think it's like a cool representation when there's an age
Speaker 1: relationship and the woman is the older party that I
Speaker 1: feel like a lot of them. But this is not
Speaker 1: the storyline that you're like, cool there it is, Uh,
Speaker 1: that's not this is not it because these two characters
Speaker 1: make no sense together. It doesn't like the huh what
Speaker 1: are they going to do? Like it doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 1: But I guess they're in love and so that's amazing
Speaker 1: Seth Meyers as a horse doctor. Um what else? What
Speaker 1: else is going on here? Yeah? It is kind of
Speaker 1: like it is. It was jarring to go down the
Speaker 1: list of main actors and and realize how many have
Speaker 1: been canceled rightfully so since since this movie was released. Um. Oh.
Speaker 1: And then there's just like the good old fashioned sexism
Speaker 1: in the movie. There's, for example, um, when Sophia Frigara
Speaker 1: tells John bond Jensen, Uh, that's what women like. We
Speaker 1: like to talk. Um some some classic, some classics out there.
Speaker 1: There's John bon Jensen's being baffled that Katherine Heigel wouldn't
Speaker 1: just give up her career to go on the road
Speaker 1: with him, and he's like, why won't you do? What's
Speaker 1: the big deal? Like women's careers are less valuable? Yea,
Speaker 1: at the very least she challenged. I was like, wow,
Speaker 1: I'm surprised this movie even had her challenge that, because
Speaker 1: she says something akin to like, I have my own life,
Speaker 1: I have my own career. I'm not going to drop
Speaker 1: it for you again. I'm going to focus on my
Speaker 1: own stuff and I love my career. And then because
Speaker 1: of that, he decides to cancel his tour, so I'm like, okay,
Speaker 1: I didn't expect for any of that to happen. That's like,
Speaker 1: which leads to one of the worst setups of the
Speaker 1: entire movie. Oh God, like where they're kissing, they're kiss
Speaker 1: kiss kissing in Times Square. Well, apparently John bon Jensen
Speaker 1: is supposed to be performing at midnight in Times Square
Speaker 1: and then she can Higgels like, wait, if you're not performing,
Speaker 1: then who is? And he's like, oh yeah, I forgot
Speaker 1: to perform at midnight in Times Square on New Year's Eve.
Speaker 1: And then Lea Michelle asked to come in and do
Speaker 1: do her a little thing Stan Lea Michelle so annoying.
Speaker 1: There's another really troubling thing about the Katherine Heigel Jensen
Speaker 1: bon Jovi storyline to me, and it is that you
Speaker 1: find out towards the end bon Jovie basically demanded that
Speaker 1: she get hired to cater this party. Yeah, which first
Speaker 1: of all, talk about like giving a woman imposter syndrome
Speaker 1: because she's she thought she got hired based on her
Speaker 1: merit and instead she got hired because bon Jovi threatened
Speaker 1: to not do the performance unless she catered the after party.
Speaker 1: That's so fucked up. He tries to save it by
Speaker 1: being like, I know you would have had a lot
Speaker 1: of offers, but I just you're like. And then the
Speaker 1: other very troubling thing about this is that she was
Speaker 1: actively trying to avoid him after he betrayed her, Yes,
Speaker 1: and he puts her in a situation where she is
Speaker 1: forced to be near him and come in contact with him,
Speaker 1: which is not dissimilar from stalking. And I totally agree
Speaker 1: he's treated as so cute for doing all of this too,
Speaker 1: like we're supposed we as an audiensor trained to be like,
Speaker 1: oh my god. I love how he keeps showing up.
Speaker 1: I love how he keeps, you know, like putting her
Speaker 1: like finances to revolve around this person that she doesn't
Speaker 1: want to be around for a very good reason. Uh.
Speaker 1: The and then that scene we're sitting on the hood
Speaker 1: of the car and he talks to Hillary Swank and
Speaker 1: he's like, oh, I'm so he's acting like he's twenty
Speaker 1: years old. He's girl, boy, screws it up. It's like, sir,
Speaker 1: you are fifty years old. You need to grow up,
Speaker 1: like and then Hillary Swank says you rock yeah, And
Speaker 1: then you got oh but yeah, sure, yeah, like you said,
Speaker 1: audiences have been trained to think that what he did
Speaker 1: was romantic and not very troubling. And that's also how
Speaker 1: Catherine Heigel reacts. She's like, Wow, you did that for me.
Speaker 1: You stalked me and gave me imposter syndrome. That's so romantic.
Speaker 1: I can't believe a famous guy made time should harass
Speaker 1: me all year, And that's exactly what he does. He
Speaker 1: basically just wears her down throughout the whole movie. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he keeps just walking into a kitchen. It made me
Speaker 1: really stress out. I was like, put on a mask,
Speaker 1: put on some gloves, like what are you doing? Get
Speaker 1: away from the food. You're dirty. Um. As much as
Speaker 1: I detest Ashton Kutcher, Leah Michelle, that whole thing that
Speaker 1: there's a lot of sexism at played there is well,
Speaker 1: he is like Mr. Nagging over and over like he
Speaker 1: for a groupie, and then only to reveal that he
Speaker 1: like is like a freelance like graphic designer who sucks
Speaker 1: at drawing that fucking thing they laser jetted off and
Speaker 1: Kucher is like, look at my art. You're like yeah, yeah, right,
Speaker 1: and then she says it's bad. But his whole thing
Speaker 1: is like he is just nagging her and then she
Speaker 1: starts to fall in love with him. I don't, It's
Speaker 1: just like garbage nonsense. They're like, we only have seven
Speaker 1: minutes to do this entire arc, and it's just and
Speaker 1: like two minutes of it are bent nagging Leah Michelle's character. Um,
Speaker 1: I mean she negs him back. So I guess there's
Speaker 1: that also not how not a good basis for a relationship.
Speaker 1: I didn't know for that that like the Boushemy test,
Speaker 1: if you apply the Bush test to that, that relationship
Speaker 1: in particular of just like if Steve bouch if you're
Speaker 1: sitting in an elevator with Steve Bushey being like, what
Speaker 1: are you some kind of groupie? Oh so do you
Speaker 1: want to kiss me? Or what? Like? It just does
Speaker 1: not It does not play, It does not work, and
Speaker 1: it's bad. Um, how about how about this? Abigail Breslin
Speaker 1: says to her mom, Sarah Jessica Parker, quote, you're clingy
Speaker 1: and mean, and it's because you don't have a man
Speaker 1: in your life. And then Sarah Jessica Parker, rather than
Speaker 1: responding meaningfully to this or challenging this at all, she
Speaker 1: nods in agree meant She's like, it is that she
Speaker 1: got me. That's why I'm trying to prevent you from
Speaker 1: going to Times Square of really dangerous area on a
Speaker 1: really dangerous day as a minor, because I need to
Speaker 1: date Josh d mel really bad. Um. Also, we didn't
Speaker 1: mention this. Her brother, Sarah Jessica Parker's brother is Zach Efron.
Speaker 1: That does that ever become relevant? No? It does not.
Speaker 1: Do they ever even appear in the same shot. I
Speaker 1: don't think that they do. Know they talk on the phone,
Speaker 1: They've never met. And Okay, I know that age gaps
Speaker 1: between siblings is a thing. I know that it happens.
Speaker 1: I didn't even thought about that. Sarah Jessica Parker is
Speaker 1: twenty two years older than Zac Efron. It's not impossible
Speaker 1: that they would be siblings. Maybe they're steps of I
Speaker 1: did find it to be sort of a weird choice though.
Speaker 1: Maybe there're steps of I don't know, could be half siblings.
Speaker 1: Maybe maybe they didn't even know who was going to
Speaker 1: end up, Like it's so much of this movie must
Speaker 1: have come together in in editing, Like who God, I
Speaker 1: didn't even think of that. Also, what a meaningless thing
Speaker 1: to do like that never comes back because he's like,
Speaker 1: He's like, well, maybe like if my niece calls me
Speaker 1: and says like her cool uncle, like, but then that
Speaker 1: never happens, so well he does. I think what happened
Speaker 1: there is that Abigail Breslin did call him off screen
Speaker 1: and for some reason told him where she would be,
Speaker 1: and that then he relays that information to Sarah Jessica Parker.
Speaker 1: But like she could have just like she found out
Speaker 1: another way where her daughter was, you know, she couldn't.
Speaker 1: She could have texted Piper's mom, who is another very
Speaker 1: trophy like woman character of the overbearing Muther. She could
Speaker 1: have just texted Piper's mom and been like where are
Speaker 1: our kids, and Pipers along to be like they're right
Speaker 1: here because I'm stalking them. Also, the just how that
Speaker 1: um Abigail Breslin and her crushed Seth, how that plays
Speaker 1: out towards the end like we already went over like
Speaker 1: the surprise kissiness of it all, but the way that
Speaker 1: they have that, even the way that Seth question talks
Speaker 1: to her is really weird. Where she is mad at
Speaker 1: him because he got surprise kissed, which is not his fault,
Speaker 1: but this movie says it is his fault, and he says,
Speaker 1: she grabbed me and she totally stole it from me,
Speaker 1: and then she's like, I don't believe you, and then
Speaker 1: he surprised kisses her. I just wanted to go through
Speaker 1: that dialogue because I'm like, the dialogue does somehow make
Speaker 1: a bad situation worse because it's just But the line
Speaker 1: I did like from him that was so clear, I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: I a grown person wrote this, A grown person who
Speaker 1: has never met a teenager before I wrote this line.
Speaker 1: Was when Abigail Breslin's like, I'm sorry, Seth, I can't
Speaker 1: calm to hang out, and he's like, but Haley, half
Speaker 1: of the history classes going and You're like, yeah, teenagers
Speaker 1: do be saying that all the time, just like music
Speaker 1: executives are always saying you can't quit it's Grammy season.
Speaker 1: I have another really fun example of a person who
Speaker 1: hasn't been a teenager in many decades and who has
Speaker 1: never talked to a teenager since. So toward the beginning
Speaker 1: of the movie, Abigail Breslin is like with her group
Speaker 1: of like girlfriends and they're like, oh my god, are
Speaker 1: you going to kiss Seth tonight? Do you even know
Speaker 1: how to kiss, and then one teenager says they have
Speaker 1: a video on the internet that shows you how to kiss,
Speaker 1: and then another teenager chimes in and says they have two,
Speaker 1: one for regular kissing and one for passionate kissing. I'm like,
Speaker 1: are you trying to talk about YouTube? Are we like
Speaker 1: doing like a helicopter around the word YouTube and we
Speaker 1: can't get there? You know, the two YouTube videos about
Speaker 1: how to kiss us about kissing? Giant that down as well.
Speaker 1: I was like, teenagers, they're always watching those two YouTube
Speaker 1: videos about kissing. Oh, here's another example of the the
Speaker 1: writer not knowing anything about comedy writing. Josh Dummel, whose
Speaker 1: character's name is apparently Sam. We guess is that the
Speaker 1: like the exclusive after party and he gets surrounded by
Speaker 1: a couple of women who are like throwing themselves at him,
Speaker 1: and he almost looks to camera in like giggles, and
Speaker 1: he says, I'm a Sam witch because his name is
Speaker 1: Sam and he's sandwitched by a couple of women. And
Speaker 1: that's a joke there, That is what is meant to
Speaker 1: be a joke. The only good comedy in this movie
Speaker 1: is when they put Michelle Pifer in the Spider Man
Speaker 1: turn off the dark. Um like acrobat thing. I did
Speaker 1: laugh when Jessica Bielle says my water broke and Seth
Speaker 1: Meyer says all of it. I did laugh at that.
Speaker 1: So that whole scene is just baff like he's like,
Speaker 1: I'm a horse doctor, your water broke. What's happening? Like?
Speaker 1: I like the scene where Sophia Rigara and Katherine Heigl
Speaker 1: throw eggs again, the most feminist scene in the movie.
Speaker 1: And um, you know, we have to respect the symbolism.
Speaker 1: It's an allegory. It's a bad scene, but they are
Speaker 1: throwing eggs for the whole thing. Yeah, Hilary Swang saying
Speaker 1: you rock. That's exciting. That's great. Well, to jump back
Speaker 1: to the pregnancy storyline really quickly, a couple of things
Speaker 1: on that when they when they bumped, the when they
Speaker 1: push their pregnancies against each other. Yes, that's that's that
Speaker 1: definitely happened. And so basically the women and this is
Speaker 1: more Jessica beal antagonizing Sarah Paulson. But Sara Paulson seems
Speaker 1: very chill, like, she seems like she's being kind of
Speaker 1: like bullied by her charm school husband to participate in
Speaker 1: all this because she keeps being like, I don't really care,
Speaker 1: Like I just want to give birth to a healthy child,
Speaker 1: which like fair. There's that whole scene where her husband,
Speaker 1: Sarah Paulson's husband, she's like, Wow, we're gonna win grand
Speaker 1: and he's like, no, it's much less than that. That's
Speaker 1: not the amount. You're wrong. You're wrong, you're wrong, And
Speaker 1: we understand that it's because like he doesn't want to
Speaker 1: like reveal to this other pregnant couple that he's nagging
Speaker 1: his nine months pregnant wife. Ever we've seen they appear
Speaker 1: in to the point where she feels like she needs
Speaker 1: to apologize to him for her water not breaking when
Speaker 1: he wanted it to. Yes, and that is awful. Um.
Speaker 1: But basically, because these two husbands are very competitive about
Speaker 1: winning this money, which they don't seem to need because
Speaker 1: they seem to be doing fine financially, there's always going
Speaker 1: to be sick horses, that's right, um, But they're kind
Speaker 1: the competitive rubs off on to their wives, and then
Speaker 1: the women get pitted against each other in this pregnancy storyline.
Speaker 1: And one thing that I was like, okay, again, here's
Speaker 1: the movie doing the bare minimum. The two women do
Speaker 1: apologize to each other towards the end, but it just
Speaker 1: it was such a flimsy story to begin with that
Speaker 1: I I just hated like seeing the women pitted against
Speaker 1: each other and then like having to apologize for it
Speaker 1: because their husbands are like being just toxic and overly
Speaker 1: competitive and like almost having like a dick measuring contest
Speaker 1: about whose wife can go and labor first kind of thing. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it just fucking sun like. And then at the end
Speaker 1: where like Seth Meyers and Jessica Biel are like, oh,
Speaker 1: wait a second, we're rich, we don't need dollars. I
Speaker 1: guess we'll just give it to Sarah Paulson and the
Speaker 1: charms School guy because they already have children, which was
Speaker 1: another thing that they reveal that You're like, oh, I
Speaker 1: guess that would have It would have and helpful to
Speaker 1: know that earlier. Would it would have made the thing
Speaker 1: with the money make more. I don't I don't know,
Speaker 1: but I'm like, you own a charm school? Is the
Speaker 1: charm school failing? Like? What is that? What's happening? I
Speaker 1: don't know, I don't know. This last movie is so bad.
Speaker 1: It's so corrible. There's another really poorly done joke where
Speaker 1: the spy kids, mom, doctor, get her name. Um, she
Speaker 1: says to Seth Meyers because Seth Meyers is like trying
Speaker 1: to negotiate like a split of the winnings with her. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and she's not having it. And she says, you're dangerously
Speaker 1: close to a rectal exam and he's like, no, don't
Speaker 1: give me a rectal exam, because what's more humiliating than
Speaker 1: someone doing something to a man's like anus? It's exhaust day.
Speaker 1: I hate this movie so much. It's bad. It makes
Speaker 1: to be said to watch. I hate how carefully I
Speaker 1: had to pay attention to it in order to know
Speaker 1: what was happening. I don't know. I mean, maybe it
Speaker 1: was worth it to see Michelle Phifer flowing around a stage.
Speaker 1: Maybe it wasn't. Who am I to say? It's definitely
Speaker 1: one of the worst movies I've ever seen that it's
Speaker 1: just so expensive it maybe want to watch um. Every
Speaker 1: time Sherlock Holmes Um Trunk of Shadows popped up, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I would rather be watching this. And I know that
Speaker 1: movie is bad. I've seen it. It's simply a disaster.
Speaker 1: It's so here. I made a short list of the
Speaker 1: people whose talents were wasted in this movie because I
Speaker 1: think some of the casting was like, yeah, I don't
Speaker 1: really respect you as an actor, and I think you
Speaker 1: were well cast for this movie. But there are some
Speaker 1: people who are, like you just feel so bad that
Speaker 1: they're in this movie. For me, alle Berry is at
Speaker 1: the top of the list, Sarah Paulson, Hilary Swink, Hector
Speaker 1: Elizondo and I'll throw Zac Efron in there, I don't care,
Speaker 1: and Michelle Piper and I guess I mean Robert de Niro.
Speaker 1: Robert DeNiro. He's in a lot of shitty movies, but
Speaker 1: he's a talented actor. You do get the feeling that
Speaker 1: Gary Marshall bullied him into doing this, like someone owed
Speaker 1: someone a favor there maybe, like I don't know, because
Speaker 1: Gary Marshall, like he directed Princess Diaries, which is probably
Speaker 1: why actor Alixanda is there. He directed Pretty Woman, he
Speaker 1: directed Beaches, he directed Runaway Bride, like, he directed a
Speaker 1: lot of you know, iconic rom coms and then just
Speaker 1: like started making really bad rom coms. But r I P. Gary,
Speaker 1: Um we yeah you started strong and then there was
Speaker 1: a few weird ones at the end, but uh, yeah,
Speaker 1: what the fund is going on? Apparently. Jessica Biale, Aston Kutcher,
Speaker 1: and Hector Alexando are also in Valentine's Day, a movie
Speaker 1: I have seen but remember zero percent of the Only
Speaker 1: thing I remember about Valentine's Day is that Taylor Swift
Speaker 1: kisses Taylor a loatner because Taylor a lot nor only
Speaker 1: day it's other people Taylor. I love that for him.
Speaker 1: I think that I've gotten. I mean, I feel like
Speaker 1: we're leaving out or like just forgetting so much, but
Speaker 1: there's only we. I mean, it's so difficult to process
Speaker 1: everything that happens in this movie, so truly is Yeah,
Speaker 1: I I guess I just wanted to touch one more time,
Speaker 1: particularly on because Sophia Regara has been the center of
Speaker 1: a large discussion about the over sexualization of latin X
Speaker 1: women in particular for so long. There's a lot of
Speaker 1: different opinions on it. We are obviously not the two
Speaker 1: people to make any sort of judgment call on it,
Speaker 1: and it's something that I want to talk about with
Speaker 1: latin X guests in the near future view. UM, but
Speaker 1: I just wanted to shout out a couple of articles
Speaker 1: and UM we can link this in the description as well. UM.
Speaker 1: For some of them. I wouldn't even say it's like
Speaker 1: necessarily criticism, just several Latin X writers that have written
Speaker 1: about her career and the sorts of parts that she's
Speaker 1: played in the past. So the first one is from
Speaker 1: this year from in Pop Sugar by Jennifer Paula Varella Rodriguez.
Speaker 1: It's called say what you Want, but Sophia Vergara has
Speaker 1: broken barriers for Latin X people on primetime TV and beyond.
Speaker 1: Then there's also interviews with Sofia Vergara on this topic.
Speaker 1: One is in Vanity Fair back in seventeen with Johanna Desta.
Speaker 1: The headline is, and I would recommend reading the whole
Speaker 1: thing Sofia regarda to critics, what's wrong with being a stereotype.
Speaker 1: So it's a very large discussion that we'll be having
Speaker 1: with guests, but I just wanted to sort of shout
Speaker 1: out that there's a certain the notes of that in
Speaker 1: the part she's playing in this movie. Yes, yeah, I
Speaker 1: will have to check those articles out. Thank you for
Speaker 1: doing that research, Jamie and um. I look forward to
Speaker 1: having this discussion and greater detail and more depths in
Speaker 1: coming episodes. We're hinting at an upcoming episode. But it's
Speaker 1: a surprise, it's a secret, but it does pass the
Speaker 1: Battel test. It does past effectively, it does does it, oopsie,
Speaker 1: it does. Between a few different um Sarah, Jessica Parker
Speaker 1: and Abigail Breslin, we mentioned that scene that passes where
Speaker 1: Abigail Breslin exposes her bra, but the context of most
Speaker 1: of their conversations is, Mom, why can't I hang out
Speaker 1: with the boy that I like? Similar to the exchanges
Speaker 1: betwe between Katherine Heigel and Sofia Regara, where they have
Speaker 1: a few exchanges that are just like two line back
Speaker 1: and forth the technically passed, but like the context of
Speaker 1: most of their conversations are about Jensen. Jessica Biale and
Speaker 1: Sarah Paulson talk about their pregnancy competition. But they're Greg's,
Speaker 1: They're they're little Gregg's and but then also like their
Speaker 1: husbands are always like right there. So none of these passes.
Speaker 1: And I mean, I'd almost be mad if there was
Speaker 1: like a really like good exchange of dialogue that does
Speaker 1: pass the Bechdel tests in an otherwise terrible, terrible movie,
Speaker 1: because it feels like it wouldn't. This movie, this movie
Speaker 1: doesn't deserve. It mostly passes by accident, by accidents, by
Speaker 1: sure coincidence or mistakes, so spiritually it doesn't pass. Spiritually
Speaker 1: it doesn't pass. I'm getting this movie no nipples. I'm
Speaker 1: giving this like nothing, nothing for this movie. Yeah, the
Speaker 1: few again, the few, like bare minimum moments where I'm like, okay,
Speaker 1: at least Katherine Heigel stands up for herself and it
Speaker 1: doesn't want to go on tour because she has her
Speaker 1: own career, or like when the regnant women apologize to
Speaker 1: each other again, like it's canceled out by every other
Speaker 1: obscene thing that happens in the movie. So zero nipples,
Speaker 1: zero nipples, which is also what I give. The year
Speaker 1: gets zero nipples, zero nipples. I think that we actually
Speaker 1: kind of jinx stuff last year, because do you remember
Speaker 1: when someone sent us a clip of us being like,
Speaker 1: twenty two might be really fine. So I'm just gonna
Speaker 1: go in neutro. I'm gonna I find it best to
Speaker 1: have very low expectations because even if something not terrible happens,
Speaker 1: they exceed your very low expectations. So I'm going to
Speaker 1: go on record as saying will be the worst year
Speaker 1: in recorded history. I'm gonna have no take because thank you,
Speaker 1: it gives me stream anxiety. Um. Well that well, there's
Speaker 1: another year and that's New Year's Eve. So this New
Speaker 1: Year's Eve, please stay inside and don't want this movie.
Speaker 1: Here's the best way to ring. Please don't watch this movie. Yes,
Speaker 1: So we'll be back next year with lots of fun episodes,
Speaker 1: lots of surprises. Maybe we'll leave our houses this year,
Speaker 1: maybe we won't. Kind of just like a fun rolling
Speaker 1: of the dice. Um, but we'll be back with you.
Speaker 1: Thank you to everyone who's listened. Thanks for common hang
Speaker 1: for a fun end of your episode. And you can
Speaker 1: find us online by at Bechtel Cast, on Instagram, on
Speaker 1: Twitter we gave up on faith Bug. You can contribute
Speaker 1: to our Patreon ak Matreon, patreon dot com slash Becketel Cast.
Speaker 1: Five dollars a month gets you to bonus episodes plus
Speaker 1: access to I think like eighty other bonus episodes. Holy moly,
Speaker 1: that's right. Yes, And then you can also check out
Speaker 1: our merch store at t public dot com slash the
Speaker 1: Bechtel Cast. And here's something that I just want to
Speaker 1: shout out because people always ask us who designs our
Speaker 1: merch and because we never mentioned this, but it's all Jamie.
Speaker 1: It's me. Jamie does all the merch, it's me. So
Speaker 1: all those block letters, guess what is my little my
Speaker 1: little pause? What am I saying? It is me? Thank you? Uh?
Speaker 1: Do you wait, Jamie? Do you draw? Or do you ill?
Speaker 1: The the hubers of his saying that and then showing
Speaker 1: me the worship I've ever seen in my life, I
Speaker 1: swear to God. All right, that's twenty twenty. We love you,
Speaker 1: Happy New Year, and let the best the JJ win.
Speaker 1: Bye bye bye