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Speaker 1: That's not one day.

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Speaker 2: Welcome back to the mom's bad Choices.

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Speaker 3: I'm Neela and I'm Erica and take her out.

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Speaker 2: What's up at Happy Wednesday? How about your week so far?

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Speaker 1: Good?

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Speaker 2: Busy, usual? What did you do? Work parent, hang out

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Speaker 2: with fellow podcasters, drink with fellow podcasters, learn a lot

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Speaker 2: of things from fellow podcasters. Oh, we really did. We

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Speaker 2: had a really good A lot of times we do well.

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Speaker 3: Not to shade anybody, but we do podcasts with other

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Speaker 3: podcasters and sometimes they're not as like lit as.

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Speaker 2: Us and this podcasts are also not as like don't

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Speaker 2: want to share their there's there's secret podcast secrets, you know.

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Speaker 2: And they were really awesome. Yeah, so we did that,

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Speaker 2: and uh, I don't know. I had funeralizations this week

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Speaker 2: this week that I've already known, but they were just

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Speaker 2: confirmed again for me. Uh yeah, that's it pretty much,

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Speaker 2: you know, I'm sure different mindesday. I agree. I don't know.

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Speaker 3: It's feeling rather like hazy this week. I think I

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Speaker 3: called you like, I just feel like I'm in a cloud.

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Speaker 3: I don't know what's happening.

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Speaker 2: What's today?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I think there's realizations and just shifting happening of energy,

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Speaker 3: and I'm feeling it and I'm just trying to sit

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Speaker 3: in it and figure out where I'm supposed to be,

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Speaker 3: what I'm supposed to be doing, and not feel rushed

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Speaker 3: or guilt about not doing, and just be and not

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Speaker 3: doing and honor that and then say what.

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Speaker 2: Are you gonna move? What's the next time? Anyway?

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Speaker 3: We have a guest here, very very very special guests

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Speaker 3: that we've been stalking for six to twelve months.

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Speaker 2: Me and ericuld do so much talking.

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Speaker 3: You're crazy Midwife, the Black Midwife, Russia, Tahini, Oh Jesus Christ.

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Speaker 1: The first time you were like and I was like yeah,

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Speaker 1: and then maybe record and just totally.

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Speaker 2: Well, there is what happens when you discuss things over

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Speaker 2: email and text.

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Speaker 1: And there's not like real words.

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Speaker 2: What's happening?

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Speaker 1: When does people? When do you have time for actually

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Speaker 1: phone conversations? I don't know, but I believe in the.

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Speaker 2: Phone conversations as I don't know, I believe I believe

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Speaker 2: in face to face. Yes, go go go please, Okay, Okay,

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Speaker 2: you don't have to go. The kids are outside, they're

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Speaker 2: already driving me. I'm like, the reason your friend is

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Speaker 2: here is will that you are distracted, Go be distracted.

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Speaker 2: I love that name Russia. What does it mean?

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Speaker 1: Okay, great story. My parents were hippies, musicians, artists. Well

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Speaker 1: my dad was my mom was just cool with all

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Speaker 1: of it. And I was there first born. And when

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Speaker 1: they were pregnant with me, they actually went to a gypsy,

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Speaker 1: a legit gypsy, to seek out what my story was

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Speaker 1: going to be in the womb. And so part of

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Speaker 1: it was my name Rasha Tahani, which means royal deer

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Speaker 1: one but like a deer by itself, not like endearment,

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Speaker 1: but like an actual like someone with antlers out somewhere.

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Speaker 1: It's Arabic and it's actually very common in Thailand. It's

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Speaker 1: a man's name or that was loads of no fun

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Speaker 1: in island and in Malaysia. And so yeah, the gypsy

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Speaker 1: told them what my name should be and that I

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Speaker 1: was a girl baby.

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Speaker 2: And they were like ooh, and then they went with that.

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Speaker 1: It sounds like something sounds like not Nichee Jamila's ally.

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Speaker 1: People always ask me, they're like, oh, so, what's your

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Speaker 1: real name? Like I changed used it to that to

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Speaker 1: this and I'm first name is My first name is Rashaw.

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Speaker 1: My middle name is to honey and go somewhere around

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Speaker 1: like college. I decided I liked all of it together,

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Speaker 1: and that's apparently how it was supposed to be, and

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Speaker 1: so I just was like, oh, yeah, that's my that's

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Speaker 1: my get.

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Speaker 2: Down, it's my jammie.

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Speaker 1: But yes, people oftentimes it will be like, so, what's

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Speaker 1: your real name? And I'm like, that is my name

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Speaker 1: on your birth certificate.

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Speaker 3: I was like, I don't even know why they're asked.

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Speaker 3: That sounds like a real name name, not like blue leaf.

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Speaker 1: Noice to the blue leaves about not blue leaf, possibly

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Speaker 1: in my in my line of work, possibly there's blue IV.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, well that's what are not far off?

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Speaker 4: That was?

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Speaker 2: So how did you get into birth work? Like what

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Speaker 2: is your story in your line of work? How did

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Speaker 2: you discover that was your passion?

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Speaker 1: You know, that's a really great question.

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Speaker 2: I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: I'm always distracted by little especially beautiful littles, beautiful chocolate littles.

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Speaker 2: So my sorry, we're just doing a lot of miming

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Speaker 2: because we literally just have this car. I feel like

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Speaker 2: we don't do this every week. I should have brought go,

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Speaker 2: get the snaps, do whatever you want. This is all

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Speaker 2: it's your world, just go, go, go crazy, do whatever

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Speaker 2: you want. Oh god, that's scary. It's a scary thought. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: but there were only four. So if you told us,

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Speaker 2: like me at fifteen, do whatever I want.

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Speaker 1: To, I would have the car, heat a phone book.

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Speaker 1: I'd be like, let's got my mom's credit card.

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Speaker 2: We're going to day it right.

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Speaker 1: Well now fifteen now would be like, let's get in

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Speaker 1: and buy all the apps. Oh hang about that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I wouldn't even have to move. Let's just get

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Speaker 2: all the apps.

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Speaker 1: Exactly, you sit here and buy all the apps.

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Speaker 2: Oh so hm.

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Speaker 1: Childhood. I I came to Midwiffrey late, and I say

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Speaker 1: that with air quotes late in the sense that my

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Speaker 1: entire childhood was spent around my grandmother, my paternal grandmother,

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Speaker 1: who was a labor and delivery nurse for many, many

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Speaker 1: years in Los Angeles, was a nurse during the time

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Speaker 1: of segregation, so meaning working on a unit and it

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Speaker 1: being only black and brown people, and if there was

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Speaker 1: a blacker round doctor, then that's who they did the

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Speaker 1: births with. But if there wasn't, it was like when

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Speaker 1: the white doctors got around to it, And so she

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Speaker 1: caught a lot of babies and her grandmother was a midwife.

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Speaker 1: She helped her grandmother with one of her siblings deliveries.

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Speaker 1: She was one of eleven, and so I grew up

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Speaker 1: a round birth. I don't know why I wasn't like

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Speaker 1: twelve talking about, oh I want to be a midwife

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Speaker 1: when I get older. But it just wasn't. It was

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Speaker 1: just so normalized. It wasn't even like a career thought.

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Speaker 1: I was working for Kaiser Permanente in environmental health and safeties.

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Speaker 1: I was an emergency preparedness department administrator. I like schedule

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Speaker 1: everybody's trips and yeah, classes and whatever else they did.

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Speaker 1: I guess train me for conflict resolution and cultural competency.

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Speaker 2: So that was like a class I used.

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Speaker 1: To teach, which is hilarious to me.

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Speaker 2: In the hospital, No, in the corporate Okay, so I'm like,

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Speaker 2: you know.

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Speaker 1: Talking to people about racism, which is like talking to

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Speaker 1: a wall as a black person to white.

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Speaker 3: People, talk talking to the employees, talking to employees about racism.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. So while I was working that job, this is amazing, right, Sorry,

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Speaker 1: this is what happens. We haven't this is this is mothering. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we haven't had an actressot with them here in a

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Speaker 1: long time. I mean, I think we got forgot you

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Speaker 1: forgot this is this is parenting.

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Speaker 2: It usually it comes around like the twenty minute Market's

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Speaker 2: just been from one minute on but it's fine. I

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Speaker 2: love them, but but then maybe they'll.

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Speaker 1: Be fine and later on we read the end. Who knows,

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Speaker 1: I don't know. But AnyWho, how I ended up at

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Speaker 1: Midwifferies where I was like, oh, why haven't I been

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Speaker 1: doing this for the last fifty eleven years. I was

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Speaker 1: at Kaiser and my cousin by marriage she calls and

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Speaker 1: she's like, well, if you want to be at this birth,

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Speaker 1: you know, you better come on, and she'd already give

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Speaker 1: me a head if she was having first one. This

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Speaker 1: would be the first birth that I would go to

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Speaker 1: with the intention of I'm going to go see a berth.

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Speaker 1: But I had been to berths before, like in hospitals,

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Speaker 1: and but never went at home, never went at home.

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Speaker 1: And me at this point, like I was wearing braids

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Speaker 1: more often, I was wearing my fro. But I think

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Speaker 1: like literally two weeks earlier, I had like a ridiculous

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Speaker 1: now we can'bell weaves my butt, Like I was a

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Speaker 1: completely different person, and so I remember asking her like,

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Speaker 1: what is one way to a birth, like that's the

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Speaker 1: la girl in me, so her what do I work?

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Speaker 5: Like?

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Speaker 1: Should like should I not have my nails done?

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Speaker 2: Like I was really that hippie outfit because it's going

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Speaker 2: to be exactly should I wear.

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Speaker 1: Like a moon moves?

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Speaker 2: I have some I have some kaftans, Like are we

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Speaker 2: gonna drum? Like I didn't. I really had no clue,

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Speaker 2: hear me, And then I roll up to the house

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Speaker 2: and I have to say it.

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Speaker 1: Because it's relevant. She at the time was a recording

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Speaker 1: artist and a writer, and so was her husband and producer.

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Speaker 1: And in between the contractions, this is her third baby.

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Speaker 1: She's in her sound booth laying down vocals in between contractions,

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Speaker 1: and the two little white maiwives are in the corner knitting,

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Speaker 1: and I'm just like, what is this life?

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Speaker 6: What is it?

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Speaker 5: Like?

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Speaker 1: I was like, Oh, this must be something that wealthy

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Speaker 1: po will do.

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Speaker 2: Anyway, is this before or after you've had your children?

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Speaker 1: I've had no children's this time. I was super, super young.

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Speaker 5: I think.

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Speaker 1: Maybe I was legal to drink. Maybe I don't know.

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Speaker 1: But I'm there and it's fifty eleven family members. There's grandparents,

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Speaker 1: great grandparents, there the littles, her older children and her

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Speaker 1: and her husband's older children are running around, and then

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Speaker 1: after she can't record any more vocals than she's just

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Speaker 1: like in her room and when her I think she

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Speaker 1: I think Canie was four, maybe four when she got

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Speaker 1: up on the bed when her sister's head was crowning

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Speaker 1: and was touching her sister's head and then looks at

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Speaker 1: all of.

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Speaker 2: Us and it's like, it's my sister, My sister's coming.

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Speaker 2: I was in the corner like this, all the tears

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Speaker 2: and just being like, how do I do this.

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Speaker 1: For a living? This is amazing? And she helped catch

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Speaker 1: her baby sister. Her dad caught, but she helped, and

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Speaker 1: then she's my cousin just started nursing right away, and

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Speaker 1: then everyone was just acting like it was no big deal.

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Speaker 1: I went in the kitchen and was just called to

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Speaker 1: make soup, like literally, the ancestors were like, you gotta

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Speaker 1: get in there and mix.

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Speaker 2: I was like, I gotta make some soup.

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Speaker 1: Like my duder was already like I think fried chicken

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Speaker 1: and lasagnya because it's black people, and a pound cake

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Speaker 1: and some monkey bread. And I was like, I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: make a soup. Yeah, and we just we hung out

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Speaker 1: for hours and the midwives did all their little checks

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Speaker 1: and whatever and measure the baby and wave the baby,

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Speaker 1: and they were like, okay, I have a good night.

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Speaker 1: We'll see you in a couple of days. And I

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Speaker 1: followed them out to the car and I was like, okay,

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Speaker 1: so how do I do this? Where's your office?

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Speaker 2: Can I sign up?

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Speaker 6: Like?

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Speaker 1: Where do I go to school? And they're just like, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's everybody, so sweet bye, and I was like no, no, no,

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Speaker 1: really no. They gave Sarah and I proceeded to stock

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Speaker 1: that poor woman for like three months. And she was

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Speaker 1: just like, look, everyone goes to a homebirth and thinks

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Speaker 1: they want to be a midwife. And I was like no,

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Speaker 1: Like I felt like I was supposed to already been

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Speaker 1: doing this when I was sitting there. And she was like, oh, well,

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Speaker 1: unfortunately I don't. I don't need an apprentice right now.

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Speaker 1: I'm really sorry. At that point in time in LA,

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Speaker 1: there were no black licensed home birth midwives.

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Speaker 4: This is the.

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Speaker 1: Very late nineties. Yeah, And there was one home birth

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Speaker 1: midwife that was unlicensed, so practicing illegally, but was very skilled,

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Speaker 1: had had her children at home with her husband, she

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Speaker 1: was vegan. I think she even was like n you know,

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Speaker 1: on some other situation where she was like drinking only

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Speaker 1: herbs at one point, like she was on a whole

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Speaker 1: other level. She had gone to nursing school. She was

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Speaker 1: from the South, but she was just like our people

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Speaker 1: meet us. And so I started prenticing with her and

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Speaker 1: doing the Kaiser things still, and like slowly at Kaiser

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Speaker 1: they're like, wow, your hair's just getting nappier and nappier.

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Speaker 1: You know, we noticed that you really not come into

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Speaker 1: the office sek like you used to. And I was like,

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Speaker 1: you know what, this is not my love, Let me

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Speaker 1: go get in nursing school. And I did nursing school

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Speaker 1: for a little bit and came head on with the

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Speaker 1: realities of the medical system, which was if I was

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Speaker 1: going to work in it, I was then being complicit

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Speaker 1: in the way they treated black people in their birthing,

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Speaker 1: and that I really didn't have a voice to try

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Speaker 1: and fix it or help them, at least in my

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Speaker 1: in my mind, and I will say, being a scorpio,

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Speaker 1: I don't like people.

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Speaker 6: Telling me what to do.

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Speaker 2: Joined the club.

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Speaker 1: It's a thing. It's a thing. I don't like people

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Speaker 1: telling me what to do. And so the straw that

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Speaker 1: broke the Campbell's back was during the week, during a

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Speaker 1: specific week, I had gone to like three home births,

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Speaker 1: these beautiful black families pushing out their babies. And it

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Speaker 1: wasn't two of them. It was they had done lots

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Speaker 1: of research and they were like, we're having a home

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Speaker 1: birth because this is the best thing for our family.

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Speaker 1: Another it was because the husband wasn't sure if his

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Speaker 1: felony had been expunged, and he was worried that if

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Speaker 1: they had a hospital birth that he might be arrested

263
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Speaker 1: or that there might be some mess. But he had

264
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Speaker 1: documents saying that it had been expunged, but he was

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Speaker 1: still fearful, still fearful.

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Speaker 2: I actually have a friend.

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Speaker 3: We have a friend who got arrested at the at

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Speaker 3: the hospital at the birth of his child before he

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Speaker 3: picked that child up.

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Speaker 2: Yep.

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Speaker 1: And that's what this father was afraid of. And this

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Speaker 1: is like the gentlest giant. He was probably like six

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Speaker 1: or eleven and three hundred pounds, but like so sweet

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Speaker 1: and his wife was like, yeah, I know that we

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Speaker 1: can't that's that can't be the way we welcome our

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Speaker 1: baby in. So those have been the three experiences I had.

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Speaker 1: I went to the hospital for my shift as a

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Speaker 1: nursing student, and this group of women came in who

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Speaker 1: now I believe were East African, like somewhere like around

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Speaker 1: like a Bedouin tribe type situation, because they were shrouded

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Speaker 1: in all these beautiful fabrics. No one could find a

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Speaker 1: translator for them, but it was very clear that there

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Speaker 1: was one person in labor and that all the other

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Speaker 1: women with her were supporting that labor. And I just

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Speaker 1: saw black people and I was like, Okay, I'm going

286
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Speaker 1: to try and help. Everyone else was kind of like,

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Speaker 1: I don't.

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Speaker 2: Know what's wrong with them. We're trying to get a translator.

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Speaker 1: Can you just get them in the room. And I

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Speaker 1: was like okay, And one of the nurses was like

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Speaker 1: get her. IVY started get her on the monitor, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, no, first off, that's not the job

293
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Speaker 1: of a nursing assistant.

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Speaker 2: That's a nurse's job.

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Speaker 1: But you know, I was over zealous, and they were like, well, chy,

296
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Speaker 1: I'll do it. I get them in the room, but

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Speaker 1: this is all like hand gestures and you know, making sounds,

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Speaker 1: and I don't I don't even I don't even know

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Speaker 1: to this day with language they spoke and it was

300
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Speaker 1: clear maybe one person kind of spoke English. Well, they

301
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Speaker 1: pull out all these gorgeous pillows and she is pulling,

302
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Speaker 1: hiking up her dress to squat and birth the baby

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Speaker 1: in the room with these pillows, and I'm like, oh, yeah,

304
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Speaker 1: we're doing this. It's amazing. And me being me, I'm like, well,

305
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Speaker 1: let's they cover those pillows with something because those are

306
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Speaker 1: really nice. And they were like throwing them away, like no, no, no,

307
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Speaker 1: the baby has to be born on these pillows. And

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh, well, I'm about this, And right

309
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Speaker 1: as the baby is literally crowning coming, I'm opening the

310
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Speaker 1: door and being like someone needs to get in here.

311
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Speaker 1: The baby's coming. And what happened next was just horrifying.

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Speaker 1: They're screaming at them, they're telling the women to get

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Speaker 1: in the corner. They're trying to lift this person up

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Speaker 1: off the floor with a baby's head basically coming out

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Speaker 1: and screaming at her don't push, don't push, And I'm like,

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Speaker 1: she doesn't understand you, but because like everything is fine

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Speaker 1: and you are messing it up. And she ended up

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Speaker 1: like some kind of way pushing her way, and the

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Speaker 1: baby was born on the pillow, and then they all

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Speaker 1: freaked out and it was like bla, which means born

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Speaker 1: out of sepsis, So like the baby wasn't born in

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Speaker 1: a sterile field, and so the pillows were the pillows

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Speaker 1: were upstairs, and so then it was like them taking

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Speaker 1: the baby from her and trying to do all the

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Speaker 1: stuff to do the baby examine her, screaming like what

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Speaker 1: are you women trying to fight? And I was just

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Speaker 1: standing there like oh my god, because I'm a kid

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Speaker 1: and I'm just like oh. And then I got reprimanded

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Speaker 1: and it was like, you know, you are losing your

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Speaker 1: clinical privileges. You can only observe now and this is

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Speaker 1: not how we do things.

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Speaker 2: And that was it.

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Speaker 3: You set me in a room with eight people I

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Speaker 3: don't speak the same language, as you told me to

335
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Speaker 3: put them on an IVY monitor. The baby is crowning,

336
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Speaker 3: no one is present, and I'm.

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Speaker 1: Even though I did the part where I opened the

338
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Speaker 1: door and I said, you know, we need helping here,

339
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Speaker 1: and I was like this is I was like, I

340
00:16:25,320 --> 00:16:27,480
Speaker 1: can't be complicit in this, like how they truated this

341
00:16:27,640 --> 00:16:31,320
Speaker 1: person and you know, they don't know their rights, they

342
00:16:31,360 --> 00:16:33,240
Speaker 1: don't know anything they just thought, oh, we have to

343
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Speaker 1: come to the hospital to have this baby. And I

344
00:16:35,760 --> 00:16:38,120
Speaker 1: felt horrible, and I was like, how am I going

345
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Speaker 1: to work in this? How am I gonna every day

346
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Speaker 1: come in and be okay with this or be fighting

347
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Speaker 1: constantly with the people that I work with and the

348
00:16:44,840 --> 00:16:46,800
Speaker 1: system that's in place that is not going to change.

349
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Speaker 1: And so that's when I was like, all right, I'm

350
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Speaker 1: gonna become a home birth midwife. And I thought I

351
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Speaker 1: just had to kind of go the illegal route because

352
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Speaker 1: I couldn't get an apprenticeship.

353
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Speaker 2: None of the white midwives.

354
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Speaker 1: Would even take my call. Wow, they wouldn't see me,

355
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Speaker 1: they wouldn't schedule me. This one woman scheduled me. She

356
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Speaker 1: was all the way in Orange County and she basically

357
00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:08,080
Speaker 1: she had seen like you know, when you're young, you

358
00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:10,360
Speaker 1: put everything on your resume, even things that are not relevant.

359
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:14,040
Speaker 1: In this radio station, long time ago, you used to

360
00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:15,560
Speaker 1: be called the beat. I think it's the beat now,

361
00:17:15,640 --> 00:17:17,760
Speaker 1: but it's something new. But a long time ago, they

362
00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:19,240
Speaker 1: had a street team and I was on the street team.

363
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Speaker 1: And I was one of the kids that would like

364
00:17:20,280 --> 00:17:24,080
Speaker 1: run around with the flyers and this club, this club,

365
00:17:24,160 --> 00:17:25,840
Speaker 1: this club, this club. I would do that and you

366
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Speaker 1: don't get paid. It's just like then you can go

367
00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:31,520
Speaker 1: to the club enough to go to the club exactly.

368
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Speaker 1: And she heard about that and wanted me to be

369
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Speaker 1: her student to get her on radio stations. She saw

370
00:17:38,680 --> 00:17:40,680
Speaker 1: ninety Birth of the Street Team and she said this,

371
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Speaker 1: So she was like, so do you think you could

372
00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:44,440
Speaker 1: schedule me some interviews on some of the local radio

373
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Speaker 1: station shows and like.

374
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Speaker 2: Not trying to teach me how to be a midwife.

375
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Speaker 2: And I was just saying, how you'd be thinking.

376
00:17:50,359 --> 00:17:52,919
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, yeah, no, bye, and I left.

377
00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:55,680
Speaker 1: And then I found out about this school and it

378
00:17:55,760 --> 00:17:57,960
Speaker 1: was all the way in Texas at the time. My

379
00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:00,800
Speaker 1: then husband didn't have a job at the time. I

380
00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:02,760
Speaker 1: had like fifty eleven. I was braiding hair, I was

381
00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:04,840
Speaker 1: starting people's locks, I was watching people's babies. I was

382
00:18:04,880 --> 00:18:07,520
Speaker 1: working in the hospital. I was being a midwifree student apprentice,

383
00:18:07,840 --> 00:18:10,200
Speaker 1: all kinds of things. And this school was like, we

384
00:18:10,320 --> 00:18:12,120
Speaker 1: have a Woman of Color scholarship and if you write

385
00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:13,680
Speaker 1: us an essaying we love it, you can come here

386
00:18:13,720 --> 00:18:16,040
Speaker 1: for free. So I like give them all of the

387
00:18:16,119 --> 00:18:18,040
Speaker 1: story that I just gave you, and they were like,

388
00:18:18,320 --> 00:18:21,680
Speaker 1: you can come here for free. And I proceeded to

389
00:18:22,080 --> 00:18:25,920
Speaker 1: work my ass off for another eight months, saving every

390
00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:29,240
Speaker 1: single paycheck and paying just rent and whatever little bills

391
00:18:29,280 --> 00:18:31,560
Speaker 1: we had. We sold our stuff and we moved to

392
00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:36,040
Speaker 1: Texas and I went to school and graduated. Pregnant, and

393
00:18:37,880 --> 00:18:41,520
Speaker 1: I graduated, and then had my son like six months

394
00:18:41,600 --> 00:18:45,400
Speaker 1: later at home, and I never at like as soon

395
00:18:45,440 --> 00:18:50,000
Speaker 1: as he was I think it was maybe six months old,

396
00:18:50,040 --> 00:18:51,160
Speaker 1: we went to our first home birth.

397
00:18:52,240 --> 00:18:53,000
Speaker 2: You had a home birth.

398
00:18:53,240 --> 00:18:54,240
Speaker 1: I had a home birth with him.

399
00:18:54,440 --> 00:18:55,359
Speaker 2: Who was your maidbye?

400
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:58,720
Speaker 1: So it was teachers from the school and one of

401
00:18:59,320 --> 00:19:01,720
Speaker 1: my she's now one of my best friends, but she

402
00:19:01,840 --> 00:19:04,720
Speaker 1: was one of the teacher's best friends, and she was

403
00:19:04,760 --> 00:19:09,159
Speaker 1: a midwife who had graduated. All white women, but an

404
00:19:09,240 --> 00:19:14,240
Speaker 1: interesting team. So the most experienced was actually the clinical

405
00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:16,680
Speaker 1: director of the school, who was still in Texas and

406
00:19:16,760 --> 00:19:19,600
Speaker 1: runs a birth center. She was a white lesbian and

407
00:19:19,720 --> 00:19:21,760
Speaker 1: she was political, and she was the first white woman

408
00:19:21,800 --> 00:19:23,879
Speaker 1: I ever saw in a midwif free conference stand up

409
00:19:23,920 --> 00:19:25,600
Speaker 1: and be like, where are the black women?

410
00:19:25,640 --> 00:19:27,600
Speaker 2: Where are the black people? Where are black people? In

411
00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:28,640
Speaker 2: the history of midwif free.

412
00:19:28,920 --> 00:19:31,680
Speaker 1: Y'all are all wrong, y'all are all like foul, and

413
00:19:32,359 --> 00:19:34,320
Speaker 1: none of you have black students, like, what are you doing?

414
00:19:34,359 --> 00:19:35,639
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, I like her.

415
00:19:36,040 --> 00:19:36,800
Speaker 2: We can be friends.

416
00:19:37,520 --> 00:19:40,480
Speaker 1: And then someone who had kind of studied under her,

417
00:19:40,560 --> 00:19:42,680
Speaker 1: who was from Cali. She was a Cali girl, she

418
00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:45,280
Speaker 1: knew La. She was white, but she was cool and

419
00:19:45,400 --> 00:19:47,920
Speaker 1: I was like, okay you. And then she had this

420
00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:49,800
Speaker 1: friend that was from Jersey and I was just like,

421
00:19:49,920 --> 00:19:50,800
Speaker 1: I don't like her.

422
00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:56,679
Speaker 2: What is with her attitude? And then we ended up

423
00:19:56,720 --> 00:19:57,520
Speaker 2: being best friends.

424
00:19:57,640 --> 00:20:01,040
Speaker 1: Like she was a writer. Like when my then husband

425
00:20:01,080 --> 00:20:03,280
Speaker 1: tapped out when I was on my fifth hour of

426
00:20:03,720 --> 00:20:06,399
Speaker 1: back labor, she like got in there, rollers leeves up

427
00:20:06,440 --> 00:20:08,200
Speaker 1: and was like giving me this counter pressure for like

428
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:09,520
Speaker 1: four hours straight.

429
00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:11,159
Speaker 6: And I was like, I love you.

430
00:20:11,880 --> 00:20:12,320
Speaker 2: He can go.

431
00:20:12,560 --> 00:20:17,560
Speaker 1: You can say he was so luckily replaced. And then

432
00:20:17,600 --> 00:20:19,520
Speaker 1: she ended I She and I ended up working together

433
00:20:19,840 --> 00:20:23,480
Speaker 1: as midwives in Texas, and you know, then when I

434
00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:25,840
Speaker 1: moved back to California, I moved to the Bay first,

435
00:20:25,920 --> 00:20:29,680
Speaker 1: and she and I worked together, and uh, yeah, that's

436
00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:30,520
Speaker 1: how it all started.

437
00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:34,320
Speaker 2: That's how it all started. That's an amazing story.

438
00:20:34,520 --> 00:20:38,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, I it's funny because I didn't When you think

439
00:20:38,840 --> 00:20:42,920
Speaker 3: of midwives and the history of midwiffree like the fact

440
00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:45,720
Speaker 3: that you had a hard time finding other black midwives,

441
00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:50,200
Speaker 3: and that they're so not inclusive. It's like black women

442
00:20:50,280 --> 00:20:55,680
Speaker 3: have been birthing babies since forever, like black women assisted

443
00:20:55,840 --> 00:20:58,840
Speaker 3: other women like birthing babies.

444
00:20:59,440 --> 00:21:02,320
Speaker 1: And when like when OBG.

445
00:21:02,480 --> 00:21:06,760
Speaker 3: Mayans started really like the boosting the recruit system or whatever,

446
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:11,760
Speaker 3: they started making these like these how do you say,

447
00:21:11,920 --> 00:21:16,199
Speaker 3: like propagandas clients campaigns, and they had them portrayed as

448
00:21:16,240 --> 00:21:20,400
Speaker 3: like these big big mamas, dirty, dirty like ancient mama

449
00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:23,440
Speaker 3: looking women, like uneducated, dumb black women.

450
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:25,399
Speaker 2: You don't want these people birthing your babies. Come to

451
00:21:25,520 --> 00:21:25,919
Speaker 2: the doctor.

452
00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:28,760
Speaker 3: And that's really how the influx and how it shifted

453
00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:31,160
Speaker 3: for us and how we now a lot of people

454
00:21:31,240 --> 00:21:33,159
Speaker 3: now think socially we have to go to the doctor.

455
00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:37,199
Speaker 3: But initially it was black women as midwives. I mean,

456
00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:39,280
Speaker 3: I don't know if that was the name then or whatever. Yeah,

457
00:21:39,320 --> 00:21:40,760
Speaker 3: we've always been midwives.

458
00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:43,280
Speaker 2: And you know, and wet nurses and all those things.

459
00:21:43,320 --> 00:21:45,879
Speaker 3: So it's so interesting to me that like this, this

460
00:21:45,960 --> 00:21:48,400
Speaker 3: white woman had to stand up and say, hey, where

461
00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:54,440
Speaker 3: are the black people here? Yeah, and even like even

462
00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:56,320
Speaker 3: so now would you say there's a lot of other

463
00:21:56,359 --> 00:21:58,480
Speaker 3: black midwives that you know of in this area, like

464
00:21:58,560 --> 00:22:14,680
Speaker 3: in Ellen so in the state of California. In southern California,

465
00:22:15,600 --> 00:22:21,440
Speaker 3: I believe there are six of us, maybe maybe six,

466
00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:24,000
Speaker 3: but one of them is my cousin and she doesn't

467
00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:25,440
Speaker 3: practice because.

468
00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:29,640
Speaker 1: She got burnt out. Okay, So, and in northern California,

469
00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:32,760
Speaker 1: I believe there's three.

470
00:22:32,960 --> 00:22:35,360
Speaker 2: How many How I know you have so many clients.

471
00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:36,760
Speaker 1: But in the state of California there are over four

472
00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:37,840
Speaker 1: hundred white head wives.

473
00:22:38,800 --> 00:22:43,520
Speaker 2: How many of your clients would you say you're black women? Oh? So, I.

474
00:22:45,160 --> 00:22:48,720
Speaker 1: I would say I have one white family, two white

475
00:22:48,760 --> 00:22:51,000
Speaker 1: families a year. Oh and I do four to six

476
00:22:51,080 --> 00:22:51,760
Speaker 1: births a month.

477
00:22:51,760 --> 00:22:54,320
Speaker 2: Just because she's the black wave. But she does tend

478
00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:56,480
Speaker 2: to other people, you guys, I do. Our friend we

479
00:22:56,600 --> 00:22:59,879
Speaker 2: got her from is not black. But that's how we know.

480
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:00,639
Speaker 2: I don't know now.

481
00:23:00,720 --> 00:23:02,399
Speaker 1: I'm very much equal opportunity.

482
00:23:02,560 --> 00:23:02,720
Speaker 4: You know.

483
00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:05,920
Speaker 1: It was actually my my web mistress when I moved

484
00:23:05,960 --> 00:23:08,680
Speaker 1: back to LA specifically, I had a really ugly, nasty,

485
00:23:08,760 --> 00:23:11,840
Speaker 1: horrific divorce and moved back to LA and then eventually

486
00:23:11,960 --> 00:23:14,600
Speaker 1: opened my own birth center and my web mistress, I

487
00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:17,560
Speaker 1: was her midwife. So she was like, I got you. Yeah,

488
00:23:18,040 --> 00:23:23,240
Speaker 1: so you know you have webmasters. I was web mistress.

489
00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:26,040
Speaker 1: So she built my website. She's a graphic designer. She

490
00:23:26,119 --> 00:23:28,000
Speaker 1: did all the amazing good stuff. And I was like,

491
00:23:28,040 --> 00:23:29,639
Speaker 1: I'm not calling you a webmaster. I'm gonn call you

492
00:23:29,680 --> 00:23:31,760
Speaker 1: a web mistress. And she was like, I'm here for that.

493
00:23:33,960 --> 00:23:37,040
Speaker 1: But like you know, she was like, you have to

494
00:23:37,080 --> 00:23:39,480
Speaker 1: put certain words on your website for people to be

495
00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:41,119
Speaker 1: able to find you when they google you. And this

496
00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:44,359
Speaker 1: was two thousand and eleven, and so she was like,

497
00:23:44,440 --> 00:23:47,119
Speaker 1: you got to put black midwife, you gotta put African midwife,

498
00:23:47,119 --> 00:23:49,400
Speaker 1: you gotta put African American midwife, because that's what people

499
00:23:49,400 --> 00:23:51,560
Speaker 1: are googling. And I was like, whatever, do whatever. You

500
00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:53,800
Speaker 1: I don't know technology, you do it. And so from

501
00:23:53,880 --> 00:23:56,960
Speaker 1: there it just became the black middlewife. Not because I

502
00:23:57,080 --> 00:23:59,240
Speaker 1: was like I am the black mid life. It was

503
00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:01,320
Speaker 1: just like, if you can't find a midwife, I know

504
00:24:01,359 --> 00:24:03,600
Speaker 1: if you type in black midwife, you'll find me, right.

505
00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:07,119
Speaker 1: So that's how that started. The majority of white clients

506
00:24:07,119 --> 00:24:09,440
Speaker 1: that I've had over the years were mostly people that

507
00:24:09,560 --> 00:24:12,520
Speaker 1: were like, I see that there's a problem, and I

508
00:24:12,640 --> 00:24:14,440
Speaker 1: want to support what it is that you're doing because

509
00:24:14,480 --> 00:24:16,320
Speaker 1: my money is going to maybe help you.

510
00:24:16,320 --> 00:24:18,240
Speaker 2: Support some other family that's not white.

511
00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:20,800
Speaker 3: And I was like, you could say, but that's why

512
00:24:20,920 --> 00:24:23,960
Speaker 3: I said that, because I feel like to all my

513
00:24:24,080 --> 00:24:28,679
Speaker 3: non black people listening, I feel like sometimes people who

514
00:24:28,760 --> 00:24:32,440
Speaker 3: are not of color, not black, see black, and I

515
00:24:32,520 --> 00:24:35,359
Speaker 3: say I'm for my people, and suddenly they get all

516
00:24:35,440 --> 00:24:38,680
Speaker 3: weird and antsy and awkward too, and it's like, oh,

517
00:24:38,800 --> 00:24:41,680
Speaker 3: so I'm not included here. Let me be the one

518
00:24:41,800 --> 00:24:48,760
Speaker 3: to tell you you, although you're used to it, may

519
00:24:48,840 --> 00:24:53,119
Speaker 3: not be the target and you may not be just

520
00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:56,320
Speaker 3: because you're not who we're aiming for and we're including

521
00:24:56,440 --> 00:25:00,080
Speaker 3: others and we're propping others and we're highlighting us, does

522
00:25:00,119 --> 00:25:04,520
Speaker 3: it mean you're not included in? It's not to belittle

523
00:25:04,600 --> 00:25:10,680
Speaker 3: you or bring you down, but stop thinking, even subconsciously,

524
00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:12,919
Speaker 3: even if you didn't realize it, and Susie.

525
00:25:13,440 --> 00:25:16,200
Speaker 1: That you are at the center of all things. That

526
00:25:16,359 --> 00:25:21,199
Speaker 1: part we have not been forever, forever and so well,

527
00:25:21,240 --> 00:25:23,560
Speaker 1: actually we've always been the center of all their things.

528
00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:27,040
Speaker 1: We're just not allowed to be acknowledged exactly exactly. We

529
00:25:27,119 --> 00:25:29,000
Speaker 1: are allowed to bear all of the burden and do

530
00:25:29,119 --> 00:25:31,359
Speaker 1: all of the heavy lifting and all the labor, but

531
00:25:31,480 --> 00:25:32,440
Speaker 1: with zero acknowledgement.

532
00:25:33,160 --> 00:25:36,359
Speaker 3: And if that makes you uncomfortable, now is the time

533
00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:38,560
Speaker 3: to sit back wherever you are, in your car, your

534
00:25:38,640 --> 00:25:43,240
Speaker 3: bedroom with a friend and think, wow, damn, this is true.

535
00:25:44,400 --> 00:25:47,919
Speaker 3: I shouldn't be offended, in fact, because I like people

536
00:25:48,160 --> 00:25:51,600
Speaker 3: and I realized there's a huge disparity. I should stand up.

537
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:53,440
Speaker 3: I should be that woman who stood up and said

538
00:25:53,520 --> 00:25:54,720
Speaker 3: where are all the black people?

539
00:25:54,920 --> 00:25:55,760
Speaker 2: Yes? Okay?

540
00:25:56,119 --> 00:25:58,720
Speaker 3: And when someone else sayes it black, white or other,

541
00:25:59,080 --> 00:26:02,080
Speaker 3: you should support that and acknowledge it because it's a

542
00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:02,919
Speaker 3: huge problem.

543
00:26:03,640 --> 00:26:05,520
Speaker 2: So that's my announcement.

544
00:26:06,400 --> 00:26:12,240
Speaker 1: It is an absolute problem. I mean I remember, I

545
00:26:12,359 --> 00:26:15,920
Speaker 1: remember when I was running my birth center and black

546
00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:17,920
Speaker 1: people would come up to me and say, oh my god,

547
00:26:17,960 --> 00:26:19,240
Speaker 1: I didn't know you had a birth center. And I

548
00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:20,639
Speaker 1: was like, what are you talking about. I just had

549
00:26:20,640 --> 00:26:22,320
Speaker 1: my baby at this other birth center and I didn't

550
00:26:22,320 --> 00:26:23,960
Speaker 1: even know that there was a black midwife or that

551
00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:25,760
Speaker 1: there was a black birth center. And I said, did

552
00:26:25,800 --> 00:26:27,800
Speaker 1: you ask them if they knew of any black midwives?

553
00:26:27,800 --> 00:26:29,200
Speaker 1: And they were like yes, they told me they didn't

554
00:26:29,240 --> 00:26:30,840
Speaker 1: know of any. And I said, did you ask them

555
00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:32,880
Speaker 1: if they knew of a black birth center, black owned

556
00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:34,400
Speaker 1: per center? And they were like yeah, and they told

557
00:26:34,440 --> 00:26:36,040
Speaker 1: me they didn't have any but that they would do

558
00:26:36,080 --> 00:26:37,440
Speaker 1: their best to take great care of me. And I

559
00:26:37,520 --> 00:26:38,639
Speaker 1: was like, I want to tell you right now, I

560
00:26:38,760 --> 00:26:39,440
Speaker 1: trained that person.

561
00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:41,240
Speaker 2: That's crazy.

562
00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:45,840
Speaker 3: That part. Well, I think the crazy thing about it

563
00:26:46,080 --> 00:26:48,600
Speaker 3: is like, okay, and I just I knew this, but

564
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:51,960
Speaker 3: I was watching, Oh, Sean King posted something and it

565
00:26:52,119 --> 00:26:57,560
Speaker 3: was his physician's assistant being interviewed and basically he's readily.

566
00:26:57,160 --> 00:26:59,719
Speaker 2: Admitting on camera he's white.

567
00:27:01,280 --> 00:27:02,960
Speaker 3: And you know, it dawned on me, like we think

568
00:27:02,960 --> 00:27:05,360
Speaker 3: about it with police, we think about it with judges,

569
00:27:06,000 --> 00:27:07,119
Speaker 3: but when.

570
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:09,520
Speaker 2: You're black, you have to think about it in general.

571
00:27:09,720 --> 00:27:13,800
Speaker 3: Yes, the person at the store, the person who whatever wherever,

572
00:27:13,960 --> 00:27:16,480
Speaker 3: the teacher that you're fucking you're dropping your kids off

573
00:27:16,480 --> 00:27:19,320
Speaker 3: to every day, when you're in a position of power

574
00:27:19,400 --> 00:27:22,959
Speaker 3: in any place, especially in the medical industry, Like these

575
00:27:22,960 --> 00:27:26,280
Speaker 3: are people's lives at hands. People have died because of

576
00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:29,639
Speaker 3: negligence just because people don't give a fuck because they're racist.

577
00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:31,240
Speaker 2: Well, I think a lot of people think, oh, it's

578
00:27:31,280 --> 00:27:33,960
Speaker 2: the hot Well, this is the one space where we're

579
00:27:34,040 --> 00:27:37,000
Speaker 2: gonna be okay, Like they don't even like think about

580
00:27:37,240 --> 00:27:39,399
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna be mistreated here. Because you're panicking.

581
00:27:39,400 --> 00:27:41,280
Speaker 3: It's usually if you're at the hospital, it's probably because

582
00:27:41,320 --> 00:27:43,719
Speaker 3: there's an emergency. And also if you're sick, you're desperate

583
00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:46,600
Speaker 3: and you're just hoping that and you rely and trust

584
00:27:46,720 --> 00:27:49,560
Speaker 3: on these medical professionals to know all this shit when

585
00:27:49,560 --> 00:27:51,200
Speaker 3: they're just like you and me and they're just wearing.

586
00:27:51,040 --> 00:27:53,320
Speaker 2: White coats and paid five hundred thousand dollars you go

587
00:27:53,359 --> 00:27:54,240
Speaker 2: to school, you know.

588
00:27:54,359 --> 00:27:57,480
Speaker 3: I mean, I'm not saying they're to discredit any medical doctors,

589
00:27:57,600 --> 00:28:00,800
Speaker 3: but I think it's important for us to knowledge.

590
00:28:00,520 --> 00:28:02,119
Speaker 2: That people are still people.

591
00:28:02,520 --> 00:28:05,600
Speaker 3: They're only limited to their scope of understanding and their

592
00:28:05,640 --> 00:28:08,879
Speaker 3: scope of knowledge, and sometimes they don't be knowing, you know,

593
00:28:09,119 --> 00:28:11,240
Speaker 3: and like you have to really be aware, especially when

594
00:28:11,240 --> 00:28:13,800
Speaker 3: you're bringing children into the world and how you're being treated.

595
00:28:13,920 --> 00:28:15,040
Speaker 2: Like the story is crazy.

596
00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:19,720
Speaker 1: Well, you have to remember also with with midwiffery and

597
00:28:19,800 --> 00:28:23,560
Speaker 1: with midwives, it was an honorable possession per position. It

598
00:28:23,640 --> 00:28:26,720
Speaker 1: was a revered position. Like it wasn't just anybody could

599
00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:29,280
Speaker 1: be a midwife. It was you were chosen either by

600
00:28:29,359 --> 00:28:31,960
Speaker 1: your community or you were chosen by whoever was the

601
00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:34,680
Speaker 1: reigning elder midwives at the time. It was the capassing

602
00:28:34,720 --> 00:28:35,639
Speaker 1: of the baton.

603
00:28:35,920 --> 00:28:36,000
Speaker 3: And.

604
00:28:37,840 --> 00:28:41,160
Speaker 1: Even under slavery, it was still a revered position, so

605
00:28:41,280 --> 00:28:43,600
Speaker 1: you probably weren't gonna get whooped as much, you probably

606
00:28:43,680 --> 00:28:47,080
Speaker 1: weren't gonna be as mistreated, but it was still considered

607
00:28:47,080 --> 00:28:49,560
Speaker 1: a gross job to tend to people in their laboring

608
00:28:49,600 --> 00:28:53,200
Speaker 1: and their birthing, And if you were not lactating yourself,

609
00:28:53,440 --> 00:28:55,720
Speaker 1: it was your responsibility to find the slave that was

610
00:28:55,800 --> 00:28:58,560
Speaker 1: going to nurse the mass's baby. So it was a

611
00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:02,640
Speaker 1: lot of responsibility, and you weren't just the midwife and

612
00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:06,840
Speaker 1: a recitaking care of people in their birthing most oftentimes

613
00:29:07,480 --> 00:29:11,000
Speaker 1: still in many parts of Africa, but also in the South,

614
00:29:11,760 --> 00:29:14,280
Speaker 1: your midwife was also your community healer. So if you

615
00:29:14,480 --> 00:29:16,920
Speaker 1: busted your head open, the midwife, if they could suit

616
00:29:16,960 --> 00:29:18,360
Speaker 1: your up a vagina, they could suot your up your

617
00:29:18,400 --> 00:29:20,360
Speaker 1: forehead like. It was the person that you went to

618
00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:22,640
Speaker 1: for everything. If you got shot or if you was

619
00:29:22,720 --> 00:29:26,600
Speaker 1: trying to escape and got hurt, it was sometimes oftentimes

620
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:28,360
Speaker 1: a midwife that took care of you, even if it

621
00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:32,800
Speaker 1: had nothing to do with birth. And we now live

622
00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:36,680
Speaker 1: in a time where everything is at the push of

623
00:29:36,720 --> 00:29:41,960
Speaker 1: a button without actual direct communication, and the hospital is

624
00:29:42,120 --> 00:29:45,560
Speaker 1: a machine. It is a business and it's a very

625
00:29:45,680 --> 00:29:49,360
Speaker 1: efficient business, which means there are timelines, there are expectations,

626
00:29:49,680 --> 00:29:51,160
Speaker 1: and if you don't meet them, they're going to help

627
00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:55,240
Speaker 1: you meet them. There's a turnover. And it's also under

628
00:29:55,280 --> 00:29:57,479
Speaker 1: the guise of well, this has been your best interest,

629
00:29:57,520 --> 00:29:59,160
Speaker 1: this is for your well being. This is how we're

630
00:29:59,160 --> 00:30:00,560
Speaker 1: going to keep you safe. This is how we're going

631
00:30:00,600 --> 00:30:04,120
Speaker 1: to guarantee you a perfect healthy baby. Well number one,

632
00:30:04,280 --> 00:30:04,960
Speaker 1: no one can make.

633
00:30:04,920 --> 00:30:06,440
Speaker 2: That guarantee, no one.

634
00:30:07,080 --> 00:30:10,200
Speaker 1: I've had clients that we're seeing a doctor, a perinatologist,

635
00:30:10,240 --> 00:30:13,880
Speaker 1: a cardiologist, like everybody and me, and we still ended

636
00:30:13,960 --> 00:30:16,600
Speaker 1: up with a baby that died or a baby that

637
00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:19,320
Speaker 1: had genetic anomalies. How do you have genetic anomalies? If

638
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:21,520
Speaker 1: you have been tested for genetic anomalies and have ultra

639
00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:23,360
Speaker 1: sounds that you have no genetic anomalies, and then the

640
00:30:23,400 --> 00:30:26,760
Speaker 1: baby's born like two weeks early, and it's like, maybe

641
00:30:26,800 --> 00:30:29,840
Speaker 1: has genetic anomalies. Like these things get missed and so

642
00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:33,560
Speaker 1: no one can promise anything. What midwives what we try

643
00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:37,000
Speaker 1: to do is fully inform you the entire process of

644
00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:39,640
Speaker 1: like all the ways that this could go and help

645
00:30:39,680 --> 00:30:43,520
Speaker 1: you remain in your power, meaning these are all your options,

646
00:30:43,600 --> 00:30:45,360
Speaker 1: how do you want to move forward, and then supporting

647
00:30:45,400 --> 00:30:47,360
Speaker 1: you in them as opposed to this is what you

648
00:30:47,440 --> 00:30:48,520
Speaker 1: have to do, and if you don't do it, your

649
00:30:48,520 --> 00:30:50,200
Speaker 1: baby could die. This is what you have to do,

650
00:30:50,240 --> 00:30:51,560
Speaker 1: and if you don't do it, then we're calling child

651
00:30:51,560 --> 00:30:53,720
Speaker 1: Protective Services. This is what you have to do, because

652
00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:56,280
Speaker 1: I'm the doctor and I'm smart, and you don't know anything.

653
00:30:56,480 --> 00:30:59,080
Speaker 2: You know near your own body that part, and so

654
00:31:00,000 --> 00:31:00,680
Speaker 2: I'm not listening to you.

655
00:31:01,040 --> 00:31:04,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, and so where Oftentimes people will hire midwives now

656
00:31:05,160 --> 00:31:07,320
Speaker 1: maybe not even intending on having a home birth, but

657
00:31:07,480 --> 00:31:10,280
Speaker 1: just wanting to be heard and seen during their pregnancy

658
00:31:10,880 --> 00:31:15,000
Speaker 1: and not be ignored and not be dismissed. And if

659
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:17,240
Speaker 1: they end up with a home birth, they're like great, amazing.

660
00:31:17,280 --> 00:31:19,600
Speaker 1: If they end up in the hospital, but their midwife

661
00:31:19,600 --> 00:31:22,120
Speaker 1: has fully informed them and prepared them and stays with

662
00:31:22,320 --> 00:31:25,480
Speaker 1: them during their care in the hospital, you will find

663
00:31:25,520 --> 00:31:27,680
Speaker 1: someone who had a sea section that is completely okay

664
00:31:27,720 --> 00:31:30,120
Speaker 1: with their sea section because they had say so over

665
00:31:30,320 --> 00:31:32,360
Speaker 1: every step of it, and they were the ones that

666
00:31:32,440 --> 00:31:33,960
Speaker 1: were like, yeah, you know what, this needs to happen.

667
00:31:34,040 --> 00:31:35,560
Speaker 1: This little baby is just not gonna come like this,

668
00:31:35,760 --> 00:31:37,520
Speaker 1: or this baby is now in a place where I'm

669
00:31:37,520 --> 00:31:39,280
Speaker 1: worried about the well being of this baby, so I'm

670
00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:41,840
Speaker 1: calling it. Or people who push out their babies at

671
00:31:41,840 --> 00:31:44,320
Speaker 1: the hospital with an epidural because they were in labor

672
00:31:44,360 --> 00:31:46,440
Speaker 1: for sixty somewhat hours at home and they were like, yo,

673
00:31:46,640 --> 00:31:49,120
Speaker 1: I tried that, Now give me the drugs, and I go, yeah,

674
00:31:49,160 --> 00:31:51,800
Speaker 1: let's go, and I support them in that and they

675
00:31:51,840 --> 00:31:53,640
Speaker 1: don't get judged and it's not like, oh, you gave

676
00:31:53,800 --> 00:31:55,960
Speaker 1: up or oh you didn't do it. It was like, girl,

677
00:31:56,160 --> 00:31:57,480
Speaker 1: do you feel like you did it the way that

678
00:31:57,560 --> 00:32:00,440
Speaker 1: you wanted to do it? Does your family feel like

679
00:32:00,480 --> 00:32:02,840
Speaker 1: they had a good experience the mission accomplished? That means

680
00:32:02,920 --> 00:32:06,040
Speaker 1: the trauma is significantly less than if you had just

681
00:32:06,080 --> 00:32:07,920
Speaker 1: been like, well, let me just do this doctor hospital

682
00:32:08,000 --> 00:32:11,240
Speaker 1: route and see what happens. A lot of my clients

683
00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:14,160
Speaker 1: are people that have had bad experiences in the hospital

684
00:32:14,200 --> 00:32:16,800
Speaker 1: and now they're trying something different, or they've seen someone

685
00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:18,959
Speaker 1: else close to them have a bad experience and they're like, yo,

686
00:32:19,560 --> 00:32:20,880
Speaker 1: I don't need to have a bad experience to be

687
00:32:20,920 --> 00:32:22,120
Speaker 1: like I want to try better next time.

688
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:22,720
Speaker 2: I'm wanted to have.

689
00:32:23,040 --> 00:32:25,560
Speaker 1: Hopefully the good experience the first time and never have

690
00:32:25,680 --> 00:32:27,720
Speaker 1: to have the traumatic experience. I think that's what happened

691
00:32:27,760 --> 00:32:30,040
Speaker 1: to me. I saw my friend at high school have

692
00:32:30,120 --> 00:32:32,840
Speaker 1: a baby, and like it scared the shit out of me.

693
00:32:33,640 --> 00:32:35,840
Speaker 1: Nobody spoke to her. There's all these beeping noises, people

694
00:32:35,920 --> 00:32:38,400
Speaker 1: moving around quickly. No one's saying anything to her. Teenager.

695
00:32:38,600 --> 00:32:40,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I was, and I had like not even

696
00:32:40,440 --> 00:32:43,960
Speaker 3: thought about where or how or any of those things.

697
00:32:44,080 --> 00:32:44,960
Speaker 1: My mom went.

698
00:32:45,320 --> 00:32:48,080
Speaker 3: I was born in alp My parents went a Tuskegee Sorry,

699
00:32:48,440 --> 00:32:50,800
Speaker 3: and I was so you know, my parents went to Tuskegee,

700
00:32:50,840 --> 00:32:53,040
Speaker 3: m just because they were in school there, and I

701
00:32:53,480 --> 00:32:55,640
Speaker 3: was conceived and born there, and they went to the

702
00:32:55,720 --> 00:32:58,600
Speaker 3: hospital closest to school, and they refused to take them.

703
00:32:58,680 --> 00:33:01,080
Speaker 3: My mom was in labor because it was right, and

704
00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:03,959
Speaker 3: they refused to her. We had to drive to Montgomery,

705
00:33:04,520 --> 00:33:07,000
Speaker 3: and then it sit is crazy when I think about it.

706
00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:10,400
Speaker 3: And then they finally reluctantly took my mom in Montgomery,

707
00:33:10,680 --> 00:33:12,239
Speaker 3: which is like not, I mean, I guess they had

708
00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:15,200
Speaker 3: to drive somewhere. In labor, they wouldn't allow my dad

709
00:33:15,240 --> 00:33:17,120
Speaker 3: to be in the room with her because they weren't married,

710
00:33:17,480 --> 00:33:19,680
Speaker 3: and she had to give birth by herself in the room.

711
00:33:20,840 --> 00:33:22,520
Speaker 2: And now when I think about that, I'm like, I

712
00:33:22,640 --> 00:33:23,920
Speaker 2: can't imagine.

713
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:26,040
Speaker 3: Like, first of all, I was so well informed because

714
00:33:26,040 --> 00:33:30,120
Speaker 3: I'm a psycho and I researched crazy and I feel

715
00:33:30,240 --> 00:33:34,000
Speaker 3: super empowered. I was empowered in my body because I

716
00:33:34,080 --> 00:33:36,080
Speaker 3: at that point new friends who had given birth at home,

717
00:33:36,160 --> 00:33:39,520
Speaker 3: and like, I'd done my research, but I still couldn't

718
00:33:39,520 --> 00:33:41,680
Speaker 3: have imagined being by myself in a hospital.

719
00:33:41,760 --> 00:33:42,600
Speaker 2: It's already scary.

720
00:33:42,760 --> 00:33:47,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, absolutely, So you know rams A g Yeah, you know,

721
00:33:47,560 --> 00:33:49,320
Speaker 3: she's like twenty two years old, Like you're young, you

722
00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:52,240
Speaker 3: don't know shit. But it's just and I feel badly

723
00:33:52,320 --> 00:33:56,120
Speaker 3: because I feel like, particularly in our community, were not informed,

724
00:33:56,280 --> 00:34:00,800
Speaker 3: like about birth, about breastfeeding, and these are things that

725
00:34:00,880 --> 00:34:03,719
Speaker 3: are but we've done for one hundred years. Like everybody,

726
00:34:03,760 --> 00:34:05,760
Speaker 3: every time someone gets all their painties and a bunch

727
00:34:05,800 --> 00:34:08,120
Speaker 3: about home birth, I'm like, how the fuck do you

728
00:34:08,200 --> 00:34:11,879
Speaker 3: think we populated the earth before hospitals?

729
00:34:12,440 --> 00:34:12,680
Speaker 1: Yeah?

730
00:34:12,719 --> 00:34:15,880
Speaker 2: I mean even my my daughter's father, like when I

731
00:34:15,960 --> 00:34:17,719
Speaker 2: told him that I wanted to have a home birth,

732
00:34:17,840 --> 00:34:21,879
Speaker 2: he was like why what? Why?

733
00:34:22,200 --> 00:34:22,359
Speaker 3: Why?

734
00:34:22,440 --> 00:34:25,840
Speaker 2: And that's why I even interviewed a few midwives, I

735
00:34:25,880 --> 00:34:26,879
Speaker 2: couldn't find a black one.

736
00:34:28,440 --> 00:34:29,360
Speaker 1: You didn't know you existed.

737
00:34:30,680 --> 00:34:32,480
Speaker 2: Maybe and I feel like that could have made the

738
00:34:32,520 --> 00:34:35,840
Speaker 2: difference for him, and then he might have supported me

739
00:34:35,880 --> 00:34:38,920
Speaker 2: because he's very pro black. But so I had this

740
00:34:39,400 --> 00:34:41,200
Speaker 2: white woman come to my house. I'll never forget. We're

741
00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:44,560
Speaker 2: sitting right there, and she was she was like talking

742
00:34:44,600 --> 00:34:47,440
Speaker 2: about you know, she was asking her so like if

743
00:34:47,480 --> 00:34:50,160
Speaker 2: there's an emergency, what happens. She said, well, we go

744
00:34:50,200 --> 00:34:51,800
Speaker 2: to the hospital. He said, then let's just go to

745
00:34:51,840 --> 00:34:54,239
Speaker 2: the hospital. Like, why are we here? What are we doing?

746
00:34:54,400 --> 00:34:56,480
Speaker 2: Erica like, I don't feel comfortable with this. I'm not

747
00:34:56,560 --> 00:34:59,160
Speaker 2: willing to risk my first baby. And then you know,

748
00:34:59,239 --> 00:35:02,359
Speaker 2: and I already started to go She's to my ob

749
00:35:02,480 --> 00:35:05,480
Speaker 2: gyn and she had already kind of like planted the

750
00:35:05,560 --> 00:35:09,600
Speaker 2: seed of you know how many dead babies I've seen

751
00:35:09,719 --> 00:35:12,640
Speaker 2: from it from home births, like in his mind and

752
00:35:12,719 --> 00:35:14,760
Speaker 2: in my mind too, And I was a little bit scared,

753
00:35:14,760 --> 00:35:16,640
Speaker 2: but I was still holding onto the business of being born.

754
00:35:16,680 --> 00:35:17,880
Speaker 2: And I was like, I can't believe she said that

755
00:35:17,960 --> 00:35:22,120
Speaker 2: to you. I can absolutely, And I mean, this is

756
00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:23,920
Speaker 2: the same woman who said after because I had a

757
00:35:23,960 --> 00:35:25,960
Speaker 2: sea section, I ended up having a sea section, not

758
00:35:26,160 --> 00:35:29,120
Speaker 2: part of anything that I wanted. That They had a

759
00:35:29,160 --> 00:35:32,320
Speaker 2: dinner at seven that she surely didn't that. After I

760
00:35:32,360 --> 00:35:34,160
Speaker 2: had the sea section, I went for my business. She's like, okay, well,

761
00:35:34,239 --> 00:35:36,040
Speaker 2: it was so excited, like, you know, for your next baby,

762
00:35:36,080 --> 00:35:38,040
Speaker 2: we'll just you know, we'll just just cut that right

763
00:35:38,080 --> 00:35:40,239
Speaker 2: back open and do it again. And I was like,

764
00:35:40,280 --> 00:35:42,960
Speaker 2: what the fuck? Because my seat section I didn't even heal,

765
00:35:43,239 --> 00:35:45,080
Speaker 2: I hadn't barely healed. And also I was like, I'm

766
00:35:45,120 --> 00:35:47,400
Speaker 2: never having another kid again, second of all, and that

767
00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:49,919
Speaker 2: was just obviously change now. But I also like, see,

768
00:35:49,960 --> 00:35:52,520
Speaker 2: the sea section was like the worst recovery of my life.

769
00:35:52,600 --> 00:35:54,520
Speaker 2: I know some woman recover from it great.

770
00:35:54,719 --> 00:35:55,440
Speaker 4: I was.

771
00:35:55,600 --> 00:35:56,320
Speaker 2: It was terrible.

772
00:35:56,480 --> 00:35:58,960
Speaker 1: But did you also labor and like trying to have No,

773
00:35:59,440 --> 00:36:00,160
Speaker 1: I didn't know.

774
00:36:00,480 --> 00:36:03,960
Speaker 2: She told me that I'm late. I needed to be

775
00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:06,560
Speaker 2: induced and that if I didn't start, if my water

776
00:36:06,600 --> 00:36:08,480
Speaker 2: hadn't broken by this amount of time, I need to

777
00:36:08,480 --> 00:36:10,239
Speaker 2: be induced. My baby was getting too big. It was

778
00:36:10,360 --> 00:36:13,080
Speaker 2: the chance of me having a vaginal birth work was decreasing,

779
00:36:13,680 --> 00:36:18,960
Speaker 2: and so I scheduled my Like the hospital immediately started

780
00:36:19,000 --> 00:36:22,399
Speaker 2: crying out of fear. I didn't even know why you're going,

781
00:36:22,440 --> 00:36:25,040
Speaker 2: Like why was no? Like my whole family was so excited,

782
00:36:25,160 --> 00:36:27,560
Speaker 2: like we knew it was coming today and I got

783
00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:29,800
Speaker 2: into the room and I just started crying because I

784
00:36:29,840 --> 00:36:33,120
Speaker 2: had never been in a hospital. I had related hospitals

785
00:36:33,200 --> 00:36:36,560
Speaker 2: to like death, like something going wrong, and like I'm

786
00:36:36,600 --> 00:36:38,279
Speaker 2: looking at this bed, I'm going to lay in, and

787
00:36:38,320 --> 00:36:42,440
Speaker 2: I just started having anxiety attack and they induced me

788
00:36:42,440 --> 00:36:44,719
Speaker 2: and immediately my contractions were like level ten and I

789
00:36:44,719 --> 00:36:47,040
Speaker 2: couldn't take it, and so then epidural and then I

790
00:36:47,160 --> 00:36:50,360
Speaker 2: was just chilling for thirty hours in labor. Never progressed.

791
00:36:51,280 --> 00:36:54,680
Speaker 2: They popped my they popped the problem. Yeah, and I

792
00:36:54,800 --> 00:36:57,040
Speaker 2: never progressed. And then I started getting sick and I

793
00:36:57,120 --> 00:37:00,320
Speaker 2: started shaking and having fevers, and then my baby was

794
00:37:00,320 --> 00:37:03,600
Speaker 2: at risk and then see section. So it was all

795
00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:06,239
Speaker 2: just like really scary. And so now I'm just like

796
00:37:06,320 --> 00:37:08,640
Speaker 2: I'll never do that again. I know, I know I'm

797
00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:12,640
Speaker 2: capable of having a regular birth. I should have never listened.

798
00:37:12,640 --> 00:37:14,640
Speaker 2: I should have never like I was the first of

799
00:37:14,719 --> 00:37:16,840
Speaker 2: my friends to have kids. I had no point of reference.

800
00:37:17,280 --> 00:37:19,560
Speaker 2: And my family has always been over medical. Everything is

801
00:37:19,600 --> 00:37:21,839
Speaker 2: at me. Like my my daughter had like a little

802
00:37:21,920 --> 00:37:23,640
Speaker 2: rational frace to my mom's like you just sake her

803
00:37:23,719 --> 00:37:25,879
Speaker 2: the doctor. I'm like, let's just see how it plays out,

804
00:37:26,560 --> 00:37:28,759
Speaker 2: we need to go to the doctor immediately, Like that's

805
00:37:28,840 --> 00:37:33,279
Speaker 2: always this the solution. And I think even for black

806
00:37:33,320 --> 00:37:35,439
Speaker 2: people too, even though like a lot of times black

807
00:37:35,440 --> 00:37:39,279
Speaker 2: people don't even realize that they're being discriminated against and

808
00:37:39,360 --> 00:37:41,960
Speaker 2: that they're not getting the answers that they deserve or

809
00:37:42,160 --> 00:37:46,279
Speaker 2: you know, but we're just so used to receiving less. Yeah,

810
00:37:46,280 --> 00:37:47,839
Speaker 2: we don't even realize we are receiving less.

811
00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:49,960
Speaker 1: We're just like, oh, this is just what I'm supposed

812
00:37:50,000 --> 00:37:52,440
Speaker 1: to experience, this is just what I'm supposed to to

813
00:37:52,880 --> 00:37:53,200
Speaker 1: deal with.

814
00:37:53,640 --> 00:37:57,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, And so it's just I'm sure that. I mean,

815
00:37:57,160 --> 00:38:01,440
Speaker 2: I'm curious to know how fathers, like, what the meetings

816
00:38:01,480 --> 00:38:03,000
Speaker 2: are like with fathers, Black fathers.

817
00:38:03,160 --> 00:38:05,000
Speaker 1: Oh, I love I love the fathers.

818
00:38:05,120 --> 00:38:07,200
Speaker 2: I love the days because like we had a midwife

819
00:38:07,239 --> 00:38:09,799
Speaker 2: five a few weeks ago, and she was saying, how

820
00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:12,760
Speaker 2: that a lot of times she has to or she's

821
00:38:12,800 --> 00:38:15,280
Speaker 2: not midwife, she's a dulah that she has to dulah

822
00:38:15,320 --> 00:38:18,200
Speaker 2: the dads, but they are freaking out half the time,

823
00:38:18,280 --> 00:38:19,920
Speaker 2: don't know what to do, and I don't know how

824
00:38:19,920 --> 00:38:20,200
Speaker 2: to like.

825
00:38:20,880 --> 00:38:23,279
Speaker 1: Well, I mean if she if that particular person is

826
00:38:23,320 --> 00:38:26,839
Speaker 1: dealing with hospital families, then yes, absolutely, but midwiff Free.

827
00:38:26,920 --> 00:38:29,480
Speaker 1: The reason why, so, the reason why Midwiffrey care works

828
00:38:30,200 --> 00:38:33,040
Speaker 1: is because a lot of people think of home birth

829
00:38:33,160 --> 00:38:36,839
Speaker 1: as like a doctor, but you do it at home,

830
00:38:36,960 --> 00:38:41,120
Speaker 1: so they're still medicalizing the experience of pregnancy, labor, birth,

831
00:38:41,200 --> 00:38:45,200
Speaker 1: and postpartum and Midwiffree is not that Midwiffrey is Midwiffrey.

832
00:38:45,239 --> 00:38:48,560
Speaker 1: It's a completely different type of healthcare. And so what

833
00:38:48,719 --> 00:38:52,320
Speaker 1: that means is most midwives spend minimum thirty minutes with you.

834
00:38:52,760 --> 00:38:54,920
Speaker 1: Your visits are minimum thirty minutes. I spend an hour

835
00:38:55,000 --> 00:38:56,400
Speaker 1: with my clients. I give them an hour. They have

836
00:38:56,480 --> 00:38:59,120
Speaker 1: forty five minutes on an hour for us to work

837
00:38:59,160 --> 00:39:01,920
Speaker 1: it all out reappointment from the beginning all the way

838
00:39:01,920 --> 00:39:04,319
Speaker 1: to the end. If their partners come, that means they're

839
00:39:04,360 --> 00:39:06,800
Speaker 1: getting in that hour too. So by the time you

840
00:39:07,239 --> 00:39:09,880
Speaker 1: have your baby, by the time you're in labor, you

841
00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:11,799
Speaker 1: don't care about walker and around your house and naked

842
00:39:11,920 --> 00:39:14,359
Speaker 1: having contractions. Your partner doesn't care about me sitting there

843
00:39:14,400 --> 00:39:16,560
Speaker 1: in the living room while you're walking around having contractions.

844
00:39:16,600 --> 00:39:19,920
Speaker 1: Your partner is confiding in me, being like she's doing good.

845
00:39:19,960 --> 00:39:21,759
Speaker 1: You know, this is what's been happening. Blah blahah blah,

846
00:39:21,800 --> 00:39:23,319
Speaker 1: and I'm like, okay, cool, how are you doing?

847
00:39:23,760 --> 00:39:24,759
Speaker 2: I'm all right, I'm all right.

848
00:39:24,840 --> 00:39:28,560
Speaker 1: Like everyone has so much information, it's no longer scary.

849
00:39:28,760 --> 00:39:29,839
Speaker 2: It's normalized.

850
00:39:30,600 --> 00:39:35,160
Speaker 1: And and that is that is a that is the

851
00:39:35,239 --> 00:39:36,920
Speaker 1: crux of min We're free. When people talk about like,

852
00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:38,480
Speaker 1: aren't you scared to have a home birth? Aren't you

853
00:39:38,560 --> 00:39:41,320
Speaker 1: scared to have your baby outside the hospital? No, because

854
00:39:41,360 --> 00:39:43,520
Speaker 1: you have so much information in regards to the pros

855
00:39:43,520 --> 00:39:45,719
Speaker 1: and the cons and all your different options. And it's

856
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:48,680
Speaker 1: not like homebirth when my grandmother was helping her grandmother.

857
00:39:49,120 --> 00:39:50,520
Speaker 1: No one is on a stick and just.

858
00:39:50,600 --> 00:39:53,120
Speaker 2: Biting it and getting through knowing there's no other option.

859
00:39:53,760 --> 00:39:55,600
Speaker 1: At any point, we could just be like, you know what,

860
00:39:56,000 --> 00:39:57,719
Speaker 1: let's just roll over the closest hospital. I don't want

861
00:39:57,719 --> 00:40:00,680
Speaker 1: to do this anymore. Or you know what, you look

862
00:40:00,760 --> 00:40:02,480
Speaker 1: really tired. You've been doing this for a long time.

863
00:40:02,760 --> 00:40:04,480
Speaker 1: I can offer you an IV here at the house

864
00:40:04,520 --> 00:40:06,120
Speaker 1: if you want, we can go to the house, like

865
00:40:06,160 --> 00:40:06,759
Speaker 1: what do you want to do?

866
00:40:07,719 --> 00:40:10,360
Speaker 2: Just in asking someone what do you want to do?

867
00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:13,920
Speaker 1: That can be the complete and total shift between I

868
00:40:13,960 --> 00:40:16,320
Speaker 1: can't do it anymore and being like okay, you know what, No, no, no,

869
00:40:16,440 --> 00:40:19,439
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna pull it together and keep going.

870
00:40:20,600 --> 00:40:22,319
Speaker 2: That's just you saying that gives me chill.

871
00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:25,439
Speaker 3: Literally never asks that question, just the option to say,

872
00:40:26,239 --> 00:40:30,080
Speaker 3: I'm I trust that I've given you the information, Now

873
00:40:30,400 --> 00:40:32,960
Speaker 3: what is it that you want to do exactly versus

874
00:40:33,080 --> 00:40:35,480
Speaker 3: your baby's going to die exactly, because literally get to

875
00:40:35,480 --> 00:40:37,520
Speaker 3: the hospital and it's like the third sentence and yeah,

876
00:40:37,680 --> 00:40:38,160
Speaker 3: no matter what.

877
00:40:38,600 --> 00:40:39,440
Speaker 2: And that's like low key.

878
00:40:39,600 --> 00:40:42,240
Speaker 1: That's how they keep themselves from being sued is because

879
00:40:42,480 --> 00:40:45,799
Speaker 1: the first thing an interrogator, a lawyer, you know, an

880
00:40:45,840 --> 00:40:47,680
Speaker 1: investigator is going to ask is, well, did they tell

881
00:40:47,719 --> 00:40:49,839
Speaker 1: you that your baby could die if you know right?

882
00:40:50,320 --> 00:40:51,959
Speaker 1: And so it's like, well, yeah, the doctor did.

883
00:40:51,920 --> 00:40:52,439
Speaker 2: A lot of times.

884
00:40:52,480 --> 00:40:53,719
Speaker 1: And it's like, oh my god.

885
00:40:54,000 --> 00:40:56,080
Speaker 3: Doctors have to tell you the worst case scenario because

886
00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:57,480
Speaker 3: they're afraid of being sued.

887
00:40:57,640 --> 00:41:00,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, they know they're going to be sued. They're

888
00:41:00,200 --> 00:41:01,080
Speaker 1: going to some holes.

889
00:41:01,080 --> 00:41:03,040
Speaker 3: Won't even less you record your births anymore because they're

890
00:41:03,080 --> 00:41:05,200
Speaker 3: afraid that you'll catch something that well they don't want

891
00:41:05,239 --> 00:41:06,520
Speaker 3: it to go viral.

892
00:41:07,920 --> 00:41:08,160
Speaker 6: Mess.

893
00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:10,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, if they, if they so decide to.

894
00:41:11,360 --> 00:41:12,640
Speaker 3: You know, what's the other thing you said your other

895
00:41:12,680 --> 00:41:18,000
Speaker 3: story that was funny about the pillows being unsanitary. But

896
00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:22,640
Speaker 3: that's like people are so uninformed and believe whatever the

897
00:41:22,680 --> 00:41:24,919
Speaker 3: fun people tell them that. Like sometimes it's like, who's

898
00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:27,120
Speaker 3: your fucking common sense? I hate people say, I'm like,

899
00:41:27,160 --> 00:41:29,000
Speaker 3: are you thinking, are you just regurgitating?

900
00:41:30,000 --> 00:41:30,720
Speaker 1: You're not allowed?

901
00:41:31,040 --> 00:41:34,800
Speaker 3: Like the hospital is so high in germs and bacteria

902
00:41:35,040 --> 00:41:38,759
Speaker 3: because there's a bunch of sick people. Your house is

903
00:41:38,840 --> 00:41:42,360
Speaker 3: literally the most standed like sterile place for you to

904
00:41:42,440 --> 00:41:44,480
Speaker 3: have baby because it's your germs and it's your ship.

905
00:41:45,080 --> 00:41:48,279
Speaker 2: So it actually makes more sense in terms of like sterility.

906
00:41:48,360 --> 00:41:52,800
Speaker 2: I don't know if that's okay, good to do it

907
00:41:52,880 --> 00:41:55,759
Speaker 2: at home, you know, like you're It's just it's so ridiculous,

908
00:41:56,120 --> 00:41:56,600
Speaker 2: and like.

909
00:41:56,760 --> 00:42:00,239
Speaker 3: For black women because while we keep saying black women,

910
00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:02,279
Speaker 3: black women, black women, and the hospital, you know is

911
00:42:02,320 --> 00:42:05,680
Speaker 3: that we're are infant mortality rates are like two and

912
00:42:05,719 --> 00:42:08,120
Speaker 3: a half, like almost two and a half times the

913
00:42:08,280 --> 00:42:11,320
Speaker 3: rates of other races, like white people. We are babies,

914
00:42:11,400 --> 00:42:14,240
Speaker 3: and our babies and mothers die at the highest rates.

915
00:42:14,480 --> 00:42:17,799
Speaker 1: Still you're still in the hot decades forever, and it's

916
00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:20,960
Speaker 1: and the people giving birth sae yeah, have the highest

917
00:42:21,400 --> 00:42:24,319
Speaker 1: maternal death rate regardless of whether you identify as a woman.

918
00:42:24,520 --> 00:42:26,959
Speaker 1: We have black folks have the highest death rate.

919
00:42:27,400 --> 00:42:30,200
Speaker 3: And you know, some people say it's because of like

920
00:42:31,280 --> 00:42:36,480
Speaker 3: I've read that it's because there's uh less money, like

921
00:42:36,640 --> 00:42:39,920
Speaker 3: low income. Another run was like, we wait to go

922
00:42:40,000 --> 00:42:42,400
Speaker 3: to the hospital late to get checked.

923
00:42:43,440 --> 00:42:46,600
Speaker 2: But it's like you're just not informed. I mean maybe

924
00:42:46,600 --> 00:42:48,680
Speaker 2: you don't. I don't, I don't. It's obviously there's racism.

925
00:42:48,840 --> 00:42:50,640
Speaker 2: Let's just be really supposed to be clear.

926
00:42:50,800 --> 00:42:54,880
Speaker 3: People are being brushed off and shit's happening, and I

927
00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:56,440
Speaker 3: think that's fucking scary.

928
00:42:56,800 --> 00:43:01,000
Speaker 2: That statistic alone is like, eh, I'm good. You're obviously

929
00:43:01,120 --> 00:43:03,120
Speaker 2: not trying that hard as you are with this bitch

930
00:43:03,160 --> 00:43:03,480
Speaker 2: over here.

931
00:43:03,600 --> 00:43:05,160
Speaker 1: Nor have you been nor have you been?

932
00:43:05,239 --> 00:43:07,680
Speaker 2: And you obviously and no one feels like there's an

933
00:43:07,719 --> 00:43:08,320
Speaker 2: issue with it.

934
00:43:08,680 --> 00:43:10,759
Speaker 1: So this is the thing you have to remember, is

935
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:14,160
Speaker 1: the system that everyone talks about or the man it

936
00:43:14,320 --> 00:43:17,920
Speaker 1: was built for them, so it works for them. It

937
00:43:18,080 --> 00:43:21,640
Speaker 1: was we were never included in the equation. We were chattel,

938
00:43:22,280 --> 00:43:23,720
Speaker 1: We were the labor.

939
00:43:24,320 --> 00:43:24,719
Speaker 4: And so.

940
00:43:26,400 --> 00:43:28,840
Speaker 1: What lots and lots of people have finally agreed on

941
00:43:29,160 --> 00:43:33,000
Speaker 1: is that the maternal and the infant mortality morbidity rates

942
00:43:33,080 --> 00:43:36,520
Speaker 1: are directly linked to racism at the beginning of it all.

943
00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:40,279
Speaker 1: It's all about racism because you know, for many years

944
00:43:40,320 --> 00:43:43,279
Speaker 1: in medical school, they taught doctors that black people didn't

945
00:43:43,320 --> 00:43:46,359
Speaker 1: feel pain the way white people did, and so black

946
00:43:46,400 --> 00:43:49,880
Speaker 1: people didn't get epidurals. When epidural started happening, it was like, oh,

947
00:43:49,960 --> 00:43:53,920
Speaker 1: you're fine, or well the epidural person isn't available right now,

948
00:43:54,160 --> 00:43:55,799
Speaker 1: or we're looking for them now.

949
00:43:55,880 --> 00:43:56,000
Speaker 6: Now.

950
00:43:56,120 --> 00:43:59,279
Speaker 1: Granted, you literally can just like breathe the wrong way

951
00:43:59,320 --> 00:44:02,520
Speaker 1: and they're like, do you want to? But for many,

952
00:44:02,600 --> 00:44:04,919
Speaker 1: many years, we just weren't allowed access to the things

953
00:44:04,920 --> 00:44:07,480
Speaker 1: that other people were given access to. My grandmother, the

954
00:44:07,520 --> 00:44:10,560
Speaker 1: one who's a midwife, she never had twilight birth when

955
00:44:10,800 --> 00:44:13,279
Speaker 1: all the other white nurses that were her counterparts were

956
00:44:13,320 --> 00:44:14,960
Speaker 1: having twilight birth. And that was where they gave them

957
00:44:14,960 --> 00:44:17,160
Speaker 1: that good juice through the ivy and they fell asleep

958
00:44:17,160 --> 00:44:18,719
Speaker 1: and they woke up and oh, look, there's a baby here.

959
00:44:19,040 --> 00:44:21,440
Speaker 1: But what they didn't talk about until years later was

960
00:44:21,840 --> 00:44:24,359
Speaker 1: you know, them waking up and being like not knowing

961
00:44:24,480 --> 00:44:26,080
Speaker 1: that they had had a baby, not knowing that they

962
00:44:26,160 --> 00:44:27,719
Speaker 1: had either vastually pushed out a baby or had a

963
00:44:27,760 --> 00:44:32,600
Speaker 1: sea section, not knowing like anything, and being terrified or

964
00:44:32,760 --> 00:44:35,520
Speaker 1: being awake the entire procedure but couldn't open their eyes,

965
00:44:35,760 --> 00:44:38,919
Speaker 1: so they felt everything or they heard all the really misogynists,

966
00:44:39,560 --> 00:44:42,400
Speaker 1: horrible racist things that were happening black folks. A lot

967
00:44:42,440 --> 00:44:44,840
Speaker 1: of black folks didn't have twilight sleep because it was like, oh, no,

968
00:44:44,960 --> 00:44:48,120
Speaker 1: you don't need that. Y'all don't feel pain like that.

969
00:44:48,719 --> 00:44:51,360
Speaker 1: And that's still, unfortunately, part of the reason why a

970
00:44:51,440 --> 00:44:54,920
Speaker 1: lot of medical negligence happens is like, oh, she just

971
00:44:55,360 --> 00:44:58,759
Speaker 1: she just complains a lot, oh whatever, And really you

972
00:44:58,880 --> 00:45:01,120
Speaker 1: are like in the corner dying. You're like literally like

973
00:45:01,239 --> 00:45:04,720
Speaker 1: I'm actually dying right now, and you can't be bothered

974
00:45:04,719 --> 00:45:08,800
Speaker 1: because you think that I'm just dating, I'm dramatic, I'm needy.

975
00:45:09,160 --> 00:45:11,600
Speaker 1: And you know when they talk about oh, well it's

976
00:45:11,719 --> 00:45:13,799
Speaker 1: because black folks don't have money or black folks don't

977
00:45:13,800 --> 00:45:16,960
Speaker 1: have access, well, we know that that's bs because we

978
00:45:17,160 --> 00:45:22,799
Speaker 1: have doctors, nurses, lawyers, we have educators, scholars that are

979
00:45:22,920 --> 00:45:24,800
Speaker 1: dying in childbirth that are black. We have people with

980
00:45:24,880 --> 00:45:27,239
Speaker 1: six figures and a partner and a house on the

981
00:45:27,320 --> 00:45:30,200
Speaker 1: hill and four cars and dying in childbirth.

982
00:45:30,280 --> 00:45:31,120
Speaker 2: They're not exempt.

983
00:45:31,239 --> 00:45:34,280
Speaker 1: It's no one's exempt. It is across the board racism.

984
00:45:34,440 --> 00:45:37,080
Speaker 1: And so what we have found, what we know as midwives,

985
00:45:37,120 --> 00:45:41,560
Speaker 1: as Black midwives specifically, is that we cannot guarantee you

986
00:45:41,719 --> 00:45:44,440
Speaker 1: a vaginal birth. But what we can guarantee you is

987
00:45:44,520 --> 00:45:47,719
Speaker 1: that some of us, not all of us, are going

988
00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:49,640
Speaker 1: to ride for you in such a way that you

989
00:45:50,000 --> 00:45:53,600
Speaker 1: never are worried about how it's gonna go because you

990
00:45:53,760 --> 00:45:56,080
Speaker 1: are running the ship and I'm literally just your hype man.

991
00:45:56,280 --> 00:45:58,600
Speaker 1: I'm just making sure that you have all the information

992
00:45:58,920 --> 00:46:00,480
Speaker 1: that you know. You know, you could go left, you

993
00:46:00,560 --> 00:46:02,719
Speaker 1: don't have to go right. Oh okay, okay, well what's left?

994
00:46:02,840 --> 00:46:04,839
Speaker 1: These are all the things that are left. Okay, okay, okay,

995
00:46:05,000 --> 00:46:06,640
Speaker 1: you know what. Now I'm gonna go down the middle. Great,

996
00:46:06,719 --> 00:46:07,920
Speaker 1: let me give you the pros and cons of that.

997
00:46:08,120 --> 00:46:10,319
Speaker 1: I didn't even see that as an option. And then,

998
00:46:10,520 --> 00:46:12,560
Speaker 1: you know, if it doesn't work out at home, going

999
00:46:12,600 --> 00:46:15,000
Speaker 1: to the hospital and continue to be an advocate. But also,

1000
00:46:15,960 --> 00:46:17,640
Speaker 1: and this is a role that I feel like only

1001
00:46:17,680 --> 00:46:19,640
Speaker 1: black midwives have to take on, Brown midwives have to

1002
00:46:19,680 --> 00:46:21,680
Speaker 1: take on, and that is we then have to turn

1003
00:46:21,760 --> 00:46:27,239
Speaker 1: into basically you know, your own personal security slash liaison

1004
00:46:27,360 --> 00:46:31,239
Speaker 1: committee for community, committee for all things healthcare meaning coming

1005
00:46:31,280 --> 00:46:34,360
Speaker 1: into the hospital and being able to figure out very

1006
00:46:34,440 --> 00:46:36,560
Speaker 1: quickly who is about you and who isn't, who is

1007
00:46:36,760 --> 00:46:39,560
Speaker 1: trying to literally sabotage your birth, who really doesn't care

1008
00:46:39,600 --> 00:46:42,080
Speaker 1: about you, who is dangerous, and who isn't, and then

1009
00:46:42,160 --> 00:46:43,520
Speaker 1: calling them out on it in such a.

1010
00:46:43,520 --> 00:46:44,480
Speaker 2: Way that they understand.

1011
00:46:44,640 --> 00:46:47,959
Speaker 1: So you can't. You can't go into the hospital space

1012
00:46:48,000 --> 00:46:51,520
Speaker 1: and not speak their language. And I will always give

1013
00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:53,439
Speaker 1: thanks for the fact that I went to nursing school

1014
00:46:53,480 --> 00:46:55,719
Speaker 1: and that I came from nurses so that I knew

1015
00:46:55,719 --> 00:46:57,560
Speaker 1: how to get into those spaces and keep black and

1016
00:46:57,600 --> 00:46:59,680
Speaker 1: brown people safe, because that's the other thing is they'll

1017
00:46:59,680 --> 00:47:01,480
Speaker 1: try and over your head and be like.

1018
00:47:01,560 --> 00:47:04,480
Speaker 2: Use these terms, and then they say Davy dead.

1019
00:47:04,600 --> 00:47:07,240
Speaker 1: And you're like okay, and you're like whoa, okay, whatever

1020
00:47:07,320 --> 00:47:10,759
Speaker 1: you said. And in reality it's like, well, you have

1021
00:47:10,880 --> 00:47:12,600
Speaker 1: the option of staying here or you can get up

1022
00:47:12,640 --> 00:47:12,800
Speaker 1: and go.

1023
00:47:13,719 --> 00:47:16,279
Speaker 2: And they didn't tell you that, right right, They don't

1024
00:47:16,320 --> 00:47:18,040
Speaker 2: play man.

1025
00:47:18,239 --> 00:47:21,759
Speaker 3: It's so crazy because I think even being like an

1026
00:47:22,400 --> 00:47:25,799
Speaker 3: informed black woman, or like a woman and black woman who.

1027
00:47:25,760 --> 00:47:26,799
Speaker 2: Knows what she wants like.

1028
00:47:29,320 --> 00:47:32,440
Speaker 3: Me and my my Obi became really cool. But I

1029
00:47:32,520 --> 00:47:34,359
Speaker 3: can I know initially she's felt like, oh, this bit

1030
00:47:34,480 --> 00:47:36,719
Speaker 3: is really annoying. And in my mind I was like,

1031
00:47:36,719 --> 00:47:38,000
Speaker 3: I'm gonna go to the hospital the whole way through

1032
00:47:38,040 --> 00:47:39,440
Speaker 3: and then at the end, I'm going to stay home.

1033
00:47:39,840 --> 00:47:41,200
Speaker 3: And I even said, can't you just be in my

1034
00:47:41,239 --> 00:47:44,400
Speaker 3: apartment building when I get labor? I like, She's like,

1035
00:47:44,560 --> 00:47:46,080
Speaker 3: maybe if you hadn't been here this whole time, and

1036
00:47:46,080 --> 00:47:48,800
Speaker 3: I wouldn't, I wouldn't, Like, maybe I couldn't lose my license.

1037
00:47:48,840 --> 00:47:54,480
Speaker 3: But no, But it's people don't women don't understand, like,

1038
00:47:54,600 --> 00:47:57,719
Speaker 3: when you're pregnant, when you give birth, you're in such

1039
00:47:57,719 --> 00:48:02,359
Speaker 3: a vulnerable place and your most runabook place. But if

1040
00:48:02,440 --> 00:48:04,440
Speaker 3: you really hone in on that power, it could be

1041
00:48:04,520 --> 00:48:08,360
Speaker 3: the most amazing experience. It could be the most empowering

1042
00:48:08,840 --> 00:48:11,000
Speaker 3: experience of your life. It's like, literally, it could be

1043
00:48:11,600 --> 00:48:14,360
Speaker 3: like a rite of passage, I always say, but it

1044
00:48:14,400 --> 00:48:16,839
Speaker 3: could also be something completely different if you don't if

1045
00:48:16,880 --> 00:48:19,080
Speaker 3: you don't look at all types of births. I'm an

1046
00:48:19,200 --> 00:48:23,359
Speaker 3: obsessed home birth YouTuber me and my child. Some people

1047
00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:24,719
Speaker 3: think it's very air. I think it's weird, and my

1048
00:48:24,800 --> 00:48:28,160
Speaker 3: children have lots of home births online. We watch your

1049
00:48:28,239 --> 00:48:32,120
Speaker 3: animal births, mother's birth bursts in the river, like all

1050
00:48:32,160 --> 00:48:35,560
Speaker 3: types of births online, and because I got obsessed with

1051
00:48:35,640 --> 00:48:38,600
Speaker 3: it way before I got pregnant, I recognized that, oh,

1052
00:48:38,640 --> 00:48:40,879
Speaker 3: birth doesn't have to be this big scary thing.

1053
00:48:41,480 --> 00:48:42,839
Speaker 2: I've seen quiet births.

1054
00:48:42,880 --> 00:48:46,600
Speaker 3: I've seen people like laugh, orgasm, cry of tears birth

1055
00:48:46,800 --> 00:48:48,120
Speaker 3: and I'm like, oh, so I have there's.

1056
00:48:47,960 --> 00:48:49,759
Speaker 2: There's an option if I'm in tune with it.

1057
00:48:50,160 --> 00:48:51,600
Speaker 3: But when I when I ended up, I end up

1058
00:48:51,600 --> 00:48:53,400
Speaker 3: having to go to the hospital, end up getting induced

1059
00:48:53,440 --> 00:48:58,200
Speaker 3: because you know, there's shit. I remember there was one

1060
00:48:58,280 --> 00:49:01,040
Speaker 3: nurse she was one way, and I remember the shift happening,

1061
00:49:01,360 --> 00:49:04,320
Speaker 3: the shift switch, and it was like a completely different vibe,

1062
00:49:04,760 --> 00:49:06,759
Speaker 3: and I was like, what the fuck just happened? And

1063
00:49:06,840 --> 00:49:08,719
Speaker 3: I was probably on some kind of twilight drug because

1064
00:49:08,719 --> 00:49:09,960
Speaker 3: I remember like going in and out a little bit.

1065
00:49:09,960 --> 00:49:11,560
Speaker 3: But I just remember, like, I don't have time for

1066
00:49:11,680 --> 00:49:15,560
Speaker 3: this type of different people like who shift is it now?

1067
00:49:15,640 --> 00:49:15,839
Speaker 2: Bitch?

1068
00:49:15,960 --> 00:49:18,800
Speaker 3: I like the last late you come in here, delegating

1069
00:49:18,800 --> 00:49:21,239
Speaker 3: shit that's been delegated, trying to kick people out.

1070
00:49:21,280 --> 00:49:23,239
Speaker 2: You need to calm the fuck down. Okay, you know what.

1071
00:49:23,239 --> 00:49:25,759
Speaker 3: I'm saying, But you don't have enough power strength to

1072
00:49:25,800 --> 00:49:27,879
Speaker 3: be cussing people out while you're in labor.

1073
00:49:27,920 --> 00:49:29,239
Speaker 1: Well, it just shouldn't even be what you have to

1074
00:49:29,280 --> 00:49:33,399
Speaker 1: do while you're trying to get it right. But why

1075
00:49:33,400 --> 00:49:36,040
Speaker 1: I have to check nurse Becky, right, but I still

1076
00:49:36,120 --> 00:49:38,560
Speaker 1: have to be this black right now at this moment.

1077
00:49:38,840 --> 00:49:40,839
Speaker 3: Yeah, and even I had like wrote out a really

1078
00:49:40,920 --> 00:49:46,520
Speaker 3: extensive birth plan, and the first person acknowledged, the second

1079
00:49:46,560 --> 00:49:48,279
Speaker 3: one didn't. And then I realized at some point somebody

1080
00:49:48,360 --> 00:49:50,279
Speaker 3: was smart enough to be like, bitch, make copies of this,

1081
00:49:50,480 --> 00:49:51,600
Speaker 3: because if you.

1082
00:49:51,680 --> 00:49:53,320
Speaker 1: Don't, this is disappears.

1083
00:49:53,680 --> 00:49:56,600
Speaker 2: It's documented. Yes, absolutely, I mean even like I want

1084
00:49:56,640 --> 00:49:57,640
Speaker 2: my colcenta after this.

1085
00:49:58,239 --> 00:50:00,279
Speaker 3: Don't cut that cord until this, which I don't know

1086
00:50:00,280 --> 00:50:04,080
Speaker 3: if that happened, but like, but you don't want to

1087
00:50:04,320 --> 00:50:06,279
Speaker 3: think about it, like it's common sense. Do you want

1088
00:50:06,320 --> 00:50:08,800
Speaker 3: to be in a hospital, in this sterile environment, uncomfortable

1089
00:50:08,840 --> 00:50:10,200
Speaker 3: in this little ass bed, or.

1090
00:50:10,160 --> 00:50:12,640
Speaker 2: Do you want to be at home, listen to your playlist,

1091
00:50:13,640 --> 00:50:16,000
Speaker 2: going in the backyard, lighting some candles. They wouldn't let

1092
00:50:16,000 --> 00:50:17,320
Speaker 2: me l like candles in the fucking hospital.

1093
00:50:17,520 --> 00:50:19,279
Speaker 3: You want to go outside. I'm not saying you endorse

1094
00:50:19,360 --> 00:50:22,640
Speaker 3: this and smoke weed, you know, it's just whatever you

1095
00:50:23,040 --> 00:50:25,640
Speaker 3: makes you comfortable. You're in your space to do it

1096
00:50:25,800 --> 00:50:28,600
Speaker 3: and like that to me alone, I'm like, yeah, let's

1097
00:50:28,640 --> 00:50:30,719
Speaker 3: be at home and have the party, Like I don't

1098
00:50:30,719 --> 00:50:32,359
Speaker 3: want to have the transport back and forth.

1099
00:50:32,400 --> 00:50:35,040
Speaker 2: It's just like common sense, you know that. You know,

1100
00:50:35,080 --> 00:50:35,840
Speaker 2: everybody's different.

1101
00:50:35,960 --> 00:50:39,319
Speaker 1: It's definitely getting harder and harder for family. So all

1102
00:50:39,400 --> 00:50:42,279
Speaker 1: of my children were born at forty two weeks. Every

1103
00:50:42,320 --> 00:50:45,040
Speaker 1: single one of them tardy to the party. Just gave zero.

1104
00:50:45,200 --> 00:50:47,440
Speaker 1: They were like what do they Unfortunately they had a

1105
00:50:47,520 --> 00:50:50,359
Speaker 1: mom that was a midwife that literally felt the same way.

1106
00:50:50,360 --> 00:50:52,799
Speaker 1: I was like, whatever, like they don't show up. When

1107
00:50:52,800 --> 00:50:54,600
Speaker 1: they show up. It was never gonna be like, oh,

1108
00:50:54,600 --> 00:50:56,880
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do so, I'm gonna force this little person out.

1109
00:50:56,880 --> 00:50:58,680
Speaker 1: I was like, they will show up when they are ready.

1110
00:50:58,719 --> 00:51:01,680
Speaker 2: It's getting too big, So that is a lie.

1111
00:51:02,239 --> 00:51:02,359
Speaker 3: Uh.

1112
00:51:02,560 --> 00:51:05,240
Speaker 1: Oftentimes what happens is they start to lose weight because

1113
00:51:05,239 --> 00:51:07,719
Speaker 1: the placenta is like, so how much longer are we

1114
00:51:07,760 --> 00:51:08,160
Speaker 1: gonna do this?

1115
00:51:08,360 --> 00:51:09,399
Speaker 2: Right? Are you hungry? Yeah?

1116
00:51:09,600 --> 00:51:12,520
Speaker 1: And so the a lot of times babies that are born,

1117
00:51:12,680 --> 00:51:15,440
Speaker 1: you know, beyond forty two weeks, they will lose weight

1118
00:51:15,480 --> 00:51:19,240
Speaker 1: and you can tell they're like their skin looks really leathery,

1119
00:51:19,320 --> 00:51:21,120
Speaker 1: like maybe a little bit deflated, like maybe it was

1120
00:51:21,160 --> 00:51:23,200
Speaker 1: puffy full chunky and then kind of.

1121
00:51:23,200 --> 00:51:26,160
Speaker 2: Deflated a little. That happened to my oldest. Uh.

1122
00:51:26,320 --> 00:51:28,880
Speaker 1: He was born at forty two weeks, and at no

1123
00:51:29,000 --> 00:51:30,799
Speaker 1: point where my midwife's like, so, what are we gonna

1124
00:51:30,840 --> 00:51:33,440
Speaker 1: start talking about making a baby come out? Like he

1125
00:51:33,600 --> 00:51:35,640
Speaker 1: just that's how long he took. And when he came out,

1126
00:51:35,680 --> 00:51:38,279
Speaker 1: he looked like a little leathery l little lizard. His

1127
00:51:38,440 --> 00:51:40,800
Speaker 1: nickname was Turtle, and I was like, oh, ho'me turtle.

1128
00:51:41,680 --> 00:51:44,760
Speaker 1: And he got chunky eventually, and he filled out eventually,

1129
00:51:44,840 --> 00:51:47,399
Speaker 1: but he was very dry and crackly. My second one,

1130
00:51:47,640 --> 00:51:50,480
Speaker 1: he was eight pounds two ounces forty two weeks and

1131
00:51:50,600 --> 00:51:52,400
Speaker 1: literally just like cussed me out from the moment he

1132
00:51:52,480 --> 00:51:56,560
Speaker 1: came out the water, his true scorpio self. That's just

1133
00:51:56,600 --> 00:51:58,640
Speaker 1: who he is. But what I will say is that

1134
00:52:00,120 --> 00:52:02,520
Speaker 1: you know, the hospitals they used to quote unquote allow

1135
00:52:02,680 --> 00:52:04,799
Speaker 1: people to go to forty two weeks, and now they

1136
00:52:04,880 --> 00:52:06,640
Speaker 1: barely let people go to forty weeks.

1137
00:52:06,719 --> 00:52:08,719
Speaker 2: Now I know, and I yeah, I think I was

1138
00:52:08,760 --> 00:52:09,319
Speaker 2: at forty one.

1139
00:52:09,600 --> 00:52:12,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, And that just is laughable to me because I

1140
00:52:13,040 --> 00:52:15,279
Speaker 1: don't know if you experiences when you're at your doctors

1141
00:52:15,440 --> 00:52:17,120
Speaker 1: is they have this little wheel that they spend to

1142
00:52:17,239 --> 00:52:18,719
Speaker 1: kind of see like how far along you are in

1143
00:52:18,719 --> 00:52:21,520
Speaker 1: your pregnancy. And it's a wheel. It's called a gestational wheel.

1144
00:52:21,719 --> 00:52:25,920
Speaker 1: It's called a guestimation, yeah, that part, and the wheel

1145
00:52:26,239 --> 00:52:28,279
Speaker 1: is got all of the days of the year on it,

1146
00:52:28,360 --> 00:52:31,320
Speaker 1: all the months, and then in the middle it's forty

1147
00:52:31,400 --> 00:52:34,399
Speaker 1: weeks gestation. Sometimes they'll go to forty two forty three.

1148
00:52:34,920 --> 00:52:39,560
Speaker 1: And the reason why I hate that wheel is because

1149
00:52:39,560 --> 00:52:41,839
Speaker 1: it's based on a twenty eight day cycle, and when

1150
00:52:41,880 --> 00:52:44,080
Speaker 1: I was having babies, it would be like every thirty

1151
00:52:44,120 --> 00:52:46,080
Speaker 1: eight days more or less. So I knew I was like, oh,

1152
00:52:46,080 --> 00:52:48,160
Speaker 1: when I have babies, these babies pots maybe about to

1153
00:52:48,160 --> 00:52:49,840
Speaker 1: be posted up for a while because my cycle is

1154
00:52:49,960 --> 00:52:54,439
Speaker 1: heck along, right, Doctors and hospital institutions are not allowed

1155
00:52:54,440 --> 00:52:57,160
Speaker 1: to take those things into consideration. And now it's just

1156
00:52:57,280 --> 00:53:00,640
Speaker 1: such that the law and the regulation, the regulating of

1157
00:53:00,719 --> 00:53:02,759
Speaker 1: midwives is that we can't take care of people be

1158
00:53:02,840 --> 00:53:05,040
Speaker 1: on forty two weeks anymore. So if I was to

1159
00:53:05,080 --> 00:53:06,960
Speaker 1: be pregnant right now, I would be breaking the law

1160
00:53:07,000 --> 00:53:08,640
Speaker 1: when I gave birth, because I know for a fact

1161
00:53:08,680 --> 00:53:11,080
Speaker 1: this this person wouldn't show up til after forty two weeks.

1162
00:53:11,400 --> 00:53:13,080
Speaker 1: So even families that are like I want to have

1163
00:53:13,120 --> 00:53:15,040
Speaker 1: a home birth, I'm gonna have a home birth. In

1164
00:53:15,160 --> 00:53:17,839
Speaker 1: this day and age, there are now laws.

1165
00:53:17,560 --> 00:53:20,880
Speaker 2: That because your license, I was your patient and I

1166
00:53:21,000 --> 00:53:22,560
Speaker 2: was forty three weeks, you cannot.

1167
00:53:24,200 --> 00:53:27,200
Speaker 1: You cannot can't attend the home birth. We also can

1168
00:53:27,320 --> 00:53:31,760
Speaker 1: no longer attend twins, multiples. We can't. We can't attend

1169
00:53:31,800 --> 00:53:32,440
Speaker 1: breech babies.

1170
00:53:32,440 --> 00:53:35,960
Speaker 2: Baby that's first and it's pass the time or just

1171
00:53:36,040 --> 00:53:37,520
Speaker 2: in general, in here general anymore.

1172
00:53:38,239 --> 00:53:39,799
Speaker 1: It ended in twenty fourteen.

1173
00:53:39,640 --> 00:53:42,040
Speaker 2: So you so any so a client comes to you,

1174
00:53:42,280 --> 00:53:44,640
Speaker 2: I'm having twins. Yes, she has to go to the hospital,

1175
00:53:44,719 --> 00:53:45,960
Speaker 2: she has to go to the host. You know what's

1176
00:53:45,960 --> 00:53:47,680
Speaker 2: gonna happen though, because a bitch like me. I just

1177
00:53:47,719 --> 00:53:50,000
Speaker 2: had a dream last night that I had triplets. I

1178
00:53:50,000 --> 00:53:51,920
Speaker 2: don't want, I want. I used to want multiple dad.

1179
00:53:52,360 --> 00:53:54,200
Speaker 2: Maybe I knew because she was coming that's what I

1180
00:53:54,239 --> 00:53:56,600
Speaker 2: was thinking, and it was a home birth. I'm on

1181
00:53:56,640 --> 00:54:00,640
Speaker 2: my period right now. It was like like I was like,

1182
00:54:00,960 --> 00:54:02,520
Speaker 2: what I woke up this morning and I was like,

1183
00:54:02,600 --> 00:54:06,040
Speaker 2: and there was a stillborn baby in my dream? Wow,

1184
00:54:07,880 --> 00:54:09,120
Speaker 2: I don't know. And then I couldn't. I was like

1185
00:54:09,160 --> 00:54:11,120
Speaker 2: trying to figure out how to breastfeed all of them,

1186
00:54:11,360 --> 00:54:13,600
Speaker 2: and I'm it was just very strange. It was got

1187
00:54:13,600 --> 00:54:15,440
Speaker 2: a little dark. That's another thing in hospitals.

1188
00:54:15,440 --> 00:54:18,040
Speaker 3: They always trying to give you some fucking formula, like immediately,

1189
00:54:18,160 --> 00:54:19,160
Speaker 3: well that's that's so yeah.

1190
00:54:19,280 --> 00:54:22,279
Speaker 2: Like my daughter, God, I'm trying to remember, cause I

1191
00:54:22,280 --> 00:54:24,800
Speaker 2: was in so many drugs, but for some reason she was.

1192
00:54:25,280 --> 00:54:27,440
Speaker 2: I had a c section obviously, and then sh I

1193
00:54:27,520 --> 00:54:30,480
Speaker 2: w sh when I she wasn't with me at first,

1194
00:54:31,680 --> 00:54:34,800
Speaker 2: and then they'd do some tests or something, and so

1195
00:54:35,160 --> 00:54:39,600
Speaker 2: I was breastfeeding, but I wasn't, like my milk hadn't

1196
00:54:39,600 --> 00:54:44,920
Speaker 2: come all the way in and did they give her No,

1197
00:54:45,040 --> 00:54:47,480
Speaker 2: they didn't give her formula. But eventually, because I had

1198
00:54:47,560 --> 00:54:51,839
Speaker 2: such trouble breastfeeding and I'd been trying for a few

1199
00:54:52,320 --> 00:54:53,759
Speaker 2: like I've been doing it for two months, and they

1200
00:54:53,800 --> 00:54:55,440
Speaker 2: were saying that she was losing weight, they suggested that

1201
00:54:55,480 --> 00:55:00,279
Speaker 2: I supplement with formula, which I really didn't want. But

1202
00:55:00,360 --> 00:55:02,200
Speaker 2: I felt like, again like I didn't us to do.

1203
00:55:02,680 --> 00:55:06,160
Speaker 2: I was like, my baby, she is losing weight. And

1204
00:55:06,280 --> 00:55:08,320
Speaker 2: I find that I find that a lot of black

1205
00:55:08,360 --> 00:55:11,800
Speaker 2: people don't even try to breastfeed. They just go straight

1206
00:55:11,840 --> 00:55:13,839
Speaker 2: into the formula. I don't know. I think a lot

1207
00:55:13,880 --> 00:55:15,520
Speaker 2: of it is. I think a lot of it is

1208
00:55:15,640 --> 00:55:18,080
Speaker 2: like I think a lot of it are because our

1209
00:55:18,120 --> 00:55:20,120
Speaker 2: bodies have alway always been sexualized. They don't look at

1210
00:55:20,160 --> 00:55:25,680
Speaker 2: our breaths so as like nature and fucking these incredible

1211
00:55:25,880 --> 00:55:28,960
Speaker 2: I've heard I've heard lack my mom to I mean,

1212
00:55:29,000 --> 00:55:31,719
Speaker 2: that's nasty. Yeah that I've heard that too, or their

1213
00:55:31,800 --> 00:55:35,400
Speaker 2: partner shaming them. I almost passed out. I heard that too.

1214
00:55:35,560 --> 00:55:39,520
Speaker 2: That ship pisses me off on a whole different level.

1215
00:55:40,480 --> 00:55:43,360
Speaker 1: But the reason their mom says it is because probably

1216
00:55:43,719 --> 00:55:47,000
Speaker 1: their mother was forced to possibly breastfeed some white person's baby,

1217
00:55:47,280 --> 00:55:50,399
Speaker 1: or their grandmother was forced to breastfeed some white person's baby.

1218
00:55:50,480 --> 00:55:52,839
Speaker 2: That is, that's where the shame comes from.

1219
00:55:52,920 --> 00:55:55,560
Speaker 1: We have the trauma and the shame because it was

1220
00:55:56,040 --> 00:55:59,480
Speaker 1: that was our responsibility, was to not breastfeed our own babies,

1221
00:55:59,520 --> 00:56:00,319
Speaker 1: to breastfeed.

1222
00:56:00,080 --> 00:56:00,840
Speaker 2: These white babies.

1223
00:56:01,239 --> 00:56:05,040
Speaker 1: And if you look, if you google a wet nurse,

1224
00:56:05,320 --> 00:56:08,600
Speaker 1: you will always see a black woman not smiling with

1225
00:56:08,760 --> 00:56:11,680
Speaker 1: either a white baby on her breast or a white

1226
00:56:11,719 --> 00:56:14,799
Speaker 1: baby sitting on her lap, and then maybe maybe her

1227
00:56:14,840 --> 00:56:17,319
Speaker 1: own black baby in the picture somewhere nearby, but most

1228
00:56:17,360 --> 00:56:20,239
Speaker 1: often not. And so we have that trauma that I

1229
00:56:20,320 --> 00:56:23,320
Speaker 1: call it. For years, I've called it cellular ancestral trauma,

1230
00:56:23,480 --> 00:56:25,200
Speaker 1: where you just have a feeling come over you that says,

1231
00:56:25,239 --> 00:56:27,359
Speaker 1: oh no, don't do that, and you don't know why,

1232
00:56:27,920 --> 00:56:30,239
Speaker 1: and I feel like that's that's that. And so for

1233
00:56:31,160 --> 00:56:32,840
Speaker 1: you know, a lot of black people, it was the

1234
00:56:33,000 --> 00:56:37,279
Speaker 1: shame of having had to experience that. And then, you know,

1235
00:56:37,680 --> 00:56:39,600
Speaker 1: if everyone in the community is like, no, we don't

1236
00:56:39,600 --> 00:56:45,279
Speaker 1: do that, that's nasty, are they okay? Yeah, okay. If

1237
00:56:45,320 --> 00:56:46,600
Speaker 1: it was my own I probably would say the same,

1238
00:56:47,120 --> 00:56:51,080
Speaker 1: don't have to ask. But it was the shame around.

1239
00:56:51,360 --> 00:56:54,320
Speaker 1: You know, you had to do something against your wishes

1240
00:56:54,880 --> 00:56:58,520
Speaker 1: and allow someone to be on your body and take

1241
00:56:58,560 --> 00:57:01,239
Speaker 1: from your body, and you're to suffer because of it.

1242
00:57:01,880 --> 00:57:04,920
Speaker 1: That is gonna leave an imprint. It's gonna leave a

1243
00:57:05,040 --> 00:57:08,560
Speaker 1: genetic imprint. And what happens then is if you've never

1244
00:57:08,600 --> 00:57:11,759
Speaker 1: seen your mother breastfeed, then how is breastfeeding going to

1245
00:57:11,800 --> 00:57:13,239
Speaker 1: be normal for you? How is it gonna be something

1246
00:57:13,280 --> 00:57:15,520
Speaker 1: that you just lean into instinctively and say, oh, yeah,

1247
00:57:15,520 --> 00:57:18,440
Speaker 1: I'm gonna breastfeed. Whenever I ask people, whenever people tell me, oh,

1248
00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:20,080
Speaker 1: we plan on breastfeeding. I want to breastfeed as long

1249
00:57:20,120 --> 00:57:22,080
Speaker 1: as this baby will let me. I always ask who

1250
00:57:22,160 --> 00:57:23,000
Speaker 1: did you see breastfeed?

1251
00:57:23,040 --> 00:57:23,400
Speaker 2: Growing up?

1252
00:57:23,400 --> 00:57:26,160
Speaker 1: Who have you seen breastfeed? And sometimes people are like, oh,

1253
00:57:26,280 --> 00:57:28,919
Speaker 1: my grandma, my mom, my auntie, Oh my cousin wants

1254
00:57:28,960 --> 00:57:31,440
Speaker 1: breastfeed me because my mom was somewhere and couldn't breastfeed me.

1255
00:57:31,600 --> 00:57:34,120
Speaker 1: Like I'll get those stories, or I will get no

1256
00:57:34,200 --> 00:57:35,360
Speaker 1: one of my family's ever breastfit.

1257
00:57:35,400 --> 00:57:39,720
Speaker 2: Ever. That's crazy. And in thinking about too, like you said,

1258
00:57:39,720 --> 00:57:41,480
Speaker 2: a lot of times partners are the ones, oh yeah,

1259
00:57:41,480 --> 00:57:43,760
Speaker 2: you know, shame I think. I mean, that wasn't my case,

1260
00:57:44,640 --> 00:57:47,680
Speaker 2: but I would say that, Yeah, I think a lot

1261
00:57:47,720 --> 00:57:49,600
Speaker 2: of it is probably because they're like when do I

1262
00:57:49,680 --> 00:57:51,360
Speaker 2: get access back to this body?

1263
00:57:51,520 --> 00:57:51,920
Speaker 1: Exactly?

1264
00:57:52,120 --> 00:57:54,880
Speaker 2: Like you need to hurt it up the baby, my duty.

1265
00:57:55,000 --> 00:57:57,960
Speaker 2: The baby's out, Like okay, let me, I'll let you

1266
00:57:58,040 --> 00:57:59,760
Speaker 2: heal for a little while, but like when do I

1267
00:57:59,800 --> 00:58:01,320
Speaker 2: get my fun bags back?

1268
00:58:01,480 --> 00:58:01,640
Speaker 6: Yes?

1269
00:58:02,000 --> 00:58:04,320
Speaker 2: You know, and it's it's crazy and you know it

1270
00:58:04,680 --> 00:58:08,160
Speaker 2: like talking about Black Breastfeeding Week and the fact that

1271
00:58:09,000 --> 00:58:10,600
Speaker 2: like I had someone be like, well, why is our

1272
00:58:10,640 --> 00:58:14,040
Speaker 2: black breastfeeding? Like why does it need to be sounds

1273
00:58:14,080 --> 00:58:16,120
Speaker 2: like why does it why, Like I don't understand, we

1274
00:58:16,320 --> 00:58:20,520
Speaker 2: know why, and yeah, it's like because the mortality rate,

1275
00:58:20,560 --> 00:58:21,880
Speaker 2: the infant mortalitary would.

1276
00:58:21,640 --> 00:58:23,680
Speaker 3: Be much lower if black women are more educated in

1277
00:58:24,640 --> 00:58:26,680
Speaker 3: breastfeeding or it was more familiar and we saw it more.

1278
00:58:27,520 --> 00:58:27,920
Speaker 1: We need to.

1279
00:58:28,000 --> 00:58:32,680
Speaker 2: Normalize it normal not Unfortunately, it's not normal in our community. Unfortunately,

1280
00:58:32,800 --> 00:58:35,480
Speaker 2: there isn't enough information around it. Unfortunately, most Black women

1281
00:58:35,520 --> 00:58:37,720
Speaker 2: are gonna go and get formula because that's what they

1282
00:58:37,760 --> 00:58:39,920
Speaker 2: think that they're supposed to do and that's better for

1283
00:58:40,040 --> 00:58:42,760
Speaker 2: their kids. They're gonna put on weight faster, they're gonna

1284
00:58:42,840 --> 00:58:45,520
Speaker 2: you know, they get their bodies back faster, they.

1285
00:58:45,440 --> 00:58:48,400
Speaker 1: Get their autonomy and what we also don't speak to

1286
00:58:49,560 --> 00:58:51,840
Speaker 1: and this is just this is from many many years

1287
00:58:51,880 --> 00:58:54,560
Speaker 1: of being a midwife. I'm this is either your seventeen

1288
00:58:54,640 --> 00:58:57,520
Speaker 1: or eighteen. I'm sorry, it's theulation. The anniversary is this

1289
00:58:57,600 --> 00:58:58,280
Speaker 1: month that I'm.

1290
00:58:59,640 --> 00:59:01,800
Speaker 2: Remind me you tell lu No what you did.

1291
00:59:02,000 --> 00:59:10,760
Speaker 1: Oh okay, okay, I'm so excited. But something that it's

1292
00:59:10,880 --> 00:59:14,240
Speaker 1: just really painful to even acknowledge. But the majority of

1293
00:59:14,400 --> 00:59:19,720
Speaker 1: black people with vaginas, if you ask them in an intimate,

1294
00:59:20,720 --> 00:59:24,880
Speaker 1: private space setting where they feel safest they will tell

1295
00:59:24,920 --> 00:59:27,760
Speaker 1: you at some point their body was touched without their consent,

1296
00:59:27,920 --> 00:59:30,680
Speaker 1: that their body was harmed without their consent. And so

1297
00:59:30,880 --> 00:59:34,240
Speaker 1: sometimes the breastfeeding can happen because it is someone touching

1298
00:59:34,320 --> 00:59:37,360
Speaker 1: your body without your consent, Like even though you're okay,

1299
00:59:37,400 --> 00:59:40,640
Speaker 1: I'm gonna breastfeed you, but then the demand of when

1300
00:59:40,720 --> 00:59:43,080
Speaker 1: and how and where is this other person not you?

1301
00:59:43,360 --> 00:59:47,400
Speaker 1: And so I came upon that early in Midwiffrey where

1302
00:59:47,640 --> 00:59:50,320
Speaker 1: this black woman was just like, no, I'm not doing that,

1303
00:59:51,040 --> 00:59:54,680
Speaker 1: and we just sat and we were just like really

1304
00:59:54,920 --> 00:59:57,240
Speaker 1: worked it out. And then finally she realized the reason

1305
00:59:57,280 --> 01:00:00,040
Speaker 1: why was because she had been raped in college and

1306
01:00:00,160 --> 01:00:00,600
Speaker 1: there was a.

1307
01:00:00,680 --> 01:00:01,240
Speaker 2: Lot of.

1308
01:00:03,560 --> 01:00:06,280
Speaker 1: There was a lot of trauma to her breast during

1309
01:00:06,360 --> 01:00:10,560
Speaker 1: that experience. And so when she came to me saying

1310
01:00:10,560 --> 01:00:12,160
Speaker 1: she wanted a homework for all these different reasons, but

1311
01:00:12,240 --> 01:00:15,280
Speaker 1: said she did not want to breastfeed, I was just like, okay,

1312
01:00:15,400 --> 01:00:18,280
Speaker 1: let's sit with that, like that's a big thing. What's

1313
01:00:18,360 --> 01:00:21,760
Speaker 1: that about? And it was literally just like the thought

1314
01:00:21,840 --> 01:00:23,840
Speaker 1: of someone being able to have access to her body

1315
01:00:24,280 --> 01:00:25,880
Speaker 1: and her not be able to control the wind and

1316
01:00:25,920 --> 01:00:29,360
Speaker 1: the wear and the how made her visibly sick, like

1317
01:00:29,520 --> 01:00:32,360
Speaker 1: she looked like she was gonna vomit, like she she

1318
01:00:32,520 --> 01:00:34,720
Speaker 1: was getting the shakes, and then she started crying and

1319
01:00:34,760 --> 01:00:36,400
Speaker 1: she was like, I just can't do it. And she's like,

1320
01:00:36,440 --> 01:00:38,480
Speaker 1: and I don't. I know, I'm a terrible person. I

1321
01:00:38,480 --> 01:00:40,280
Speaker 1: should totally want to breastfeed this baby. And I just

1322
01:00:40,360 --> 01:00:43,200
Speaker 1: had to be like, no, you are a human being,

1323
01:00:43,480 --> 01:00:46,760
Speaker 1: you are an individual, and you have experienced horrific trauma,

1324
01:00:47,640 --> 01:00:50,400
Speaker 1: and this tiny person doesn't need to be held through that,

1325
01:00:50,680 --> 01:00:53,000
Speaker 1: Like they will be all right. I was like, how

1326
01:00:53,080 --> 01:00:54,480
Speaker 1: do you want to feed this baby? I was like,

1327
01:00:54,520 --> 01:00:56,840
Speaker 1: because that's also a big wiffree is what is the

1328
01:00:57,040 --> 01:01:01,880
Speaker 1: best way for it to happen for you? And sometimes

1329
01:01:01,920 --> 01:01:04,720
Speaker 1: that is a schedulete section and sometimes that is not breastfeeding.

1330
01:01:05,280 --> 01:01:10,560
Speaker 1: What happened was she had mentally prepared for dunder milk.

1331
01:01:11,040 --> 01:01:13,240
Speaker 1: She had a cousin that was had tons of milk,

1332
01:01:13,320 --> 01:01:15,120
Speaker 1: had a freezer full, and was a stay at home mom,

1333
01:01:15,200 --> 01:01:17,400
Speaker 1: so she wasn't about to be, you know, back at

1334
01:01:17,440 --> 01:01:19,080
Speaker 1: work with milk, and so she was like, oh, donate,

1335
01:01:19,200 --> 01:01:20,560
Speaker 1: I got you girl, at least for the first month.

1336
01:01:20,640 --> 01:01:22,400
Speaker 1: Let's do donor milk. If you change your mind, you

1337
01:01:22,400 --> 01:01:23,760
Speaker 1: decided to want to do formia will do formula, but

1338
01:01:23,760 --> 01:01:24,640
Speaker 1: your baby will get brest milk.

1339
01:01:24,640 --> 01:01:26,040
Speaker 6: At first, she was like, Okay, that's what I'm gonna do.

1340
01:01:26,840 --> 01:01:29,840
Speaker 1: Baby comes, the baby's on her chest, and you know,

1341
01:01:29,960 --> 01:01:32,360
Speaker 1: she worked hard for this baby, and the baby does

1342
01:01:32,480 --> 01:01:35,000
Speaker 1: this thing that's called the breast crawl, and this little

1343
01:01:35,040 --> 01:01:37,760
Speaker 1: munchkins just made her way and all I ever wanted.

1344
01:01:38,560 --> 01:01:39,520
Speaker 2: It's it's a thing.

1345
01:01:40,080 --> 01:01:40,280
Speaker 4: I know.

1346
01:01:40,400 --> 01:01:41,280
Speaker 1: It makes me want to cry.

1347
01:01:41,360 --> 01:01:43,520
Speaker 2: Honestly, Jamil always laughs at me because I like, I

1348
01:01:43,560 --> 01:01:45,640
Speaker 2: always wanted her to crawl to my bro I did.

1349
01:01:45,760 --> 01:01:46,440
Speaker 1: I feel like I was.

1350
01:01:46,480 --> 01:01:50,120
Speaker 2: Really robbed of that, I know, and I really wanted that,

1351
01:01:50,360 --> 01:01:51,960
Speaker 2: and I feel like it could have made the difference.

1352
01:01:52,240 --> 01:01:55,160
Speaker 2: And like it like it makes me cry but thinking

1353
01:01:55,200 --> 01:01:57,880
Speaker 2: about it, and I feel like it's almost like I

1354
01:01:57,920 --> 01:01:59,040
Speaker 2: want to have a second one just so I can

1355
01:01:59,080 --> 01:01:59,800
Speaker 2: EXPERI It's.

1356
01:01:59,720 --> 01:02:04,200
Speaker 1: That, I'm serious.

1357
01:02:04,400 --> 01:02:07,240
Speaker 2: I'm just like, I feel like I really wanted that,

1358
01:02:07,360 --> 01:02:08,000
Speaker 2: and that's I mean.

1359
01:02:08,240 --> 01:02:11,280
Speaker 1: And that was healing for her. Was so this baby

1360
01:02:11,360 --> 01:02:13,560
Speaker 1: crawled over to her breast and she was like, what

1361
01:02:13,840 --> 01:02:16,080
Speaker 1: what's happening? What's happening? And I was like, it's a

1362
01:02:16,200 --> 01:02:18,920
Speaker 1: mammal instinct. That's why your nipples got so black. That's

1363
01:02:18,920 --> 01:02:22,080
Speaker 1: why your nipples are so large, right because they little,

1364
01:02:22,640 --> 01:02:24,959
Speaker 1: you know, weak neckt They just got to get close

1365
01:02:25,040 --> 01:02:26,760
Speaker 1: enough to find the button, and they're like, that's where

1366
01:02:26,800 --> 01:02:28,360
Speaker 1: I'm supposed to get on. I was like, and they

1367
01:02:28,400 --> 01:02:29,960
Speaker 1: can smell you. They can smell it.

1368
01:02:30,120 --> 01:02:30,600
Speaker 2: It's crazy.

1369
01:02:30,640 --> 01:02:33,680
Speaker 1: And she was just like, and I said, your baby

1370
01:02:33,720 --> 01:02:35,400
Speaker 1: doesn't have to do it, we can I can move her.

1371
01:02:35,400 --> 01:02:37,880
Speaker 1: And she was like, oh, it's okay, it's okay, and

1372
01:02:38,000 --> 01:02:41,760
Speaker 1: she just kind of let it happen, and she later

1373
01:02:41,840 --> 01:02:43,080
Speaker 1: on said they breastfed for three years.

1374
01:02:43,080 --> 01:02:48,440
Speaker 2: By the way, three years all probably it probably was

1375
01:02:48,480 --> 01:02:48,840
Speaker 2: a healing.

1376
01:02:49,240 --> 01:02:51,960
Speaker 1: She said that when the baby latched on that she

1377
01:02:52,160 --> 01:02:54,720
Speaker 1: was immediately triggered taken back to that place. But then

1378
01:02:54,760 --> 01:02:56,560
Speaker 1: she also was still like she was still in the

1379
01:02:56,600 --> 01:02:59,600
Speaker 1: berth tub, so she was also like grounded back to no,

1380
01:02:59,720 --> 01:03:02,080
Speaker 1: you're you just got this baby in your body, like

1381
01:03:02,160 --> 01:03:05,600
Speaker 1: you're safe, she's safe, you're safe. And then she started

1382
01:03:05,640 --> 01:03:09,160
Speaker 1: crying and she was like, we're doing it, We're doing it.

1383
01:03:09,240 --> 01:03:11,960
Speaker 1: And so of course everyone's crying because we all knew

1384
01:03:11,960 --> 01:03:14,880
Speaker 1: that she wasn't gonna breastfeed, and you know, she was like,

1385
01:03:14,920 --> 01:03:16,600
Speaker 1: I'm not saying I want to do it forever, but like,

1386
01:03:16,760 --> 01:03:19,640
Speaker 1: this is okay, She's okay, And I was like, you're okay,

1387
01:03:19,720 --> 01:03:22,680
Speaker 1: She's okay, okay, And so at first it was well,

1388
01:03:22,680 --> 01:03:24,320
Speaker 1: I'm going to breastfeed, but I'm only going to breakfeed

1389
01:03:24,360 --> 01:03:27,320
Speaker 1: at home because I can't do this in public, like

1390
01:03:27,600 --> 01:03:28,920
Speaker 1: like it takes. It took a lot for her to

1391
01:03:29,000 --> 01:03:30,840
Speaker 1: be like, okay, I'm okay with this, and then she

1392
01:03:30,840 --> 01:03:32,480
Speaker 1: started breastfeeding public. But it was like she had the

1393
01:03:32,480 --> 01:03:35,880
Speaker 1: whole tent over her because that's what made her feel

1394
01:03:35,920 --> 01:03:39,000
Speaker 1: safe and protect and she became protective of the two

1395
01:03:39,080 --> 01:03:41,760
Speaker 1: of them and this experience and not wanting I think

1396
01:03:41,760 --> 01:03:43,960
Speaker 1: it was because also she had a girl, but it

1397
01:03:44,080 --> 01:03:47,120
Speaker 1: was like not wanting her daughter to be sexualized in

1398
01:03:47,240 --> 01:03:49,200
Speaker 1: her nursing, Like she just had a lot of things

1399
01:03:49,240 --> 01:03:52,160
Speaker 1: that she was working out. And then eventually she was like,

1400
01:03:52,240 --> 01:03:54,400
Speaker 1: you know, I'm just gonna pump, and pumping works for me,

1401
01:03:54,520 --> 01:03:57,560
Speaker 1: and so they would nurse at home and then whenever

1402
01:03:57,640 --> 01:04:01,160
Speaker 1: they were public, she had ever for her and that

1403
01:04:01,440 --> 01:04:03,640
Speaker 1: healed her and every baby that she had after that

1404
01:04:03,720 --> 01:04:05,880
Speaker 1: she breastfed until they didn't want a breastfeed anymore. But

1405
01:04:06,400 --> 01:04:08,880
Speaker 1: it was that experience of having the birth that she

1406
01:04:09,160 --> 01:04:12,280
Speaker 1: had and that baby doing it on their own. That

1407
01:04:12,520 --> 01:04:14,880
Speaker 1: it wasn't something that I was like, oh, let's just try,

1408
01:04:15,120 --> 01:04:15,880
Speaker 1: It was just it.

1409
01:04:15,960 --> 01:04:16,720
Speaker 6: That's how it happened.

1410
01:04:16,800 --> 01:04:20,120
Speaker 1: She was and she was in control. And you know

1411
01:04:20,320 --> 01:04:23,160
Speaker 1: every appointment. You know, midwives also we do way more

1412
01:04:23,240 --> 01:04:26,960
Speaker 1: follow up, so we have higher rates of breastfeeding because

1413
01:04:27,040 --> 01:04:29,400
Speaker 1: if people want a breastfeed, we're seeing you twenty four

1414
01:04:29,440 --> 01:04:31,480
Speaker 1: to forty eight hours after the birth. We're seeing you

1415
01:04:31,600 --> 01:04:33,640
Speaker 1: at like one week after the birth. We're seeing you

1416
01:04:33,720 --> 01:04:36,520
Speaker 1: at two four and six weeks. In the state of California,

1417
01:04:36,560 --> 01:04:39,000
Speaker 1: we're legally allowed to support you for the six weeks

1418
01:04:39,040 --> 01:04:41,520
Speaker 1: after you give birth. So really, depending on when you

1419
01:04:41,600 --> 01:04:44,000
Speaker 1: hire your midwife, you're hiring her for a year, just

1420
01:04:44,120 --> 01:04:47,360
Speaker 1: rough and dirty. So what we see then is less

1421
01:04:47,400 --> 01:04:50,040
Speaker 1: mental health issues because someone's constantly checking on you that

1422
01:04:50,240 --> 01:04:52,720
Speaker 1: actually cares about you, and you have a relationship with

1423
01:04:53,360 --> 01:04:56,080
Speaker 1: there's someone available to you. If your breastfeeding is not

1424
01:04:56,200 --> 01:04:58,520
Speaker 1: going well, or if you're stressed out, or if things

1425
01:04:58,560 --> 01:05:00,320
Speaker 1: are just I don't know what's happening. I need to

1426
01:05:00,320 --> 01:05:02,440
Speaker 1: talk it out, like that's what midwives do. It's not

1427
01:05:02,600 --> 01:05:04,760
Speaker 1: just your blood pressure is great, have a great day.

1428
01:05:04,920 --> 01:05:05,439
Speaker 1: See soon.

1429
01:05:05,920 --> 01:05:06,640
Speaker 2: It's all of it.

1430
01:05:07,280 --> 01:05:12,680
Speaker 1: And so when someone is having a lot of intrepidation

1431
01:05:12,760 --> 01:05:15,560
Speaker 1: about breastfeeding or about their breasts, or about what they're

1432
01:05:15,600 --> 01:05:17,360
Speaker 1: gonna do with this baby and feeding this baby, when

1433
01:05:17,440 --> 01:05:20,120
Speaker 1: everything around them is formula, formula, or you know, we'll

1434
01:05:20,200 --> 01:05:21,640
Speaker 1: just pump or you know, you know, if you want

1435
01:05:21,640 --> 01:05:23,200
Speaker 1: to have a good time, you have to pump and dump, which,

1436
01:05:23,240 --> 01:05:24,640
Speaker 1: by the way, we don't do that anymore. We don't

1437
01:05:24,640 --> 01:05:25,120
Speaker 1: pump and dump.

1438
01:05:25,160 --> 01:05:25,520
Speaker 3: We don't.

1439
01:05:25,800 --> 01:05:27,520
Speaker 2: No, you just keep just give it to them. You

1440
01:05:27,800 --> 01:05:30,360
Speaker 2: just basically a body filters it, filters it.

1441
01:05:30,640 --> 01:05:33,240
Speaker 1: And you know, the only time we the only time

1442
01:05:33,320 --> 01:05:36,480
Speaker 1: we say you absolutely should not breastfeed is if you

1443
01:05:36,600 --> 01:05:40,000
Speaker 1: are raging alcoholic, because the toxicity level of your breast

1444
01:05:40,000 --> 01:05:41,520
Speaker 1: milk is just not worth the risk to the baby.

1445
01:05:41,840 --> 01:05:43,760
Speaker 1: But if you're just going out and you're having Sunday

1446
01:05:43,760 --> 01:05:45,720
Speaker 1: brunch with your girls and you're staying on top of

1447
01:05:45,760 --> 01:05:48,360
Speaker 1: your two liters of water a day, you're filtering it through,

1448
01:05:48,440 --> 01:05:50,720
Speaker 1: you're pushing it through, and so the risk versus the

1449
01:05:50,800 --> 01:05:54,680
Speaker 1: benefit the benefits so much higher. They still encourage people

1450
01:05:54,760 --> 01:05:57,520
Speaker 1: that are going through drug treatment programs to breastfeed if

1451
01:05:57,600 --> 01:06:00,280
Speaker 1: they're not, you know, really doing a horrible.

1452
01:06:01,920 --> 01:06:02,200
Speaker 3: Wow.

1453
01:06:03,720 --> 01:06:11,040
Speaker 2: Cool, Wow, I'm like so scared to see what that

1454
01:06:11,120 --> 01:06:13,840
Speaker 2: room looks like that it's very quiet. I know something's

1455
01:06:13,880 --> 01:06:14,560
Speaker 2: going on back there.

1456
01:06:16,760 --> 01:06:18,440
Speaker 1: Okay, well then you don't.

1457
01:06:19,280 --> 01:06:21,880
Speaker 2: It's funny. We had a we were just we were

1458
01:06:22,160 --> 01:06:26,640
Speaker 2: working and we to Beila was eavedropping on these ladies

1459
01:06:26,720 --> 01:06:29,920
Speaker 2: talking and one of them was talking about she's pregnant,

1460
01:06:30,000 --> 01:06:32,720
Speaker 2: and she was, I guess feeling like she was like

1461
01:06:32,840 --> 01:06:34,840
Speaker 2: I don't really care about not drinking, but she's like

1462
01:06:34,920 --> 01:06:37,640
Speaker 2: the smoking. I want to smoke and my nose, yes,

1463
01:06:37,760 --> 01:06:39,160
Speaker 2: it's like you can? I did?

1464
01:06:39,880 --> 01:06:40,200
Speaker 1: I want?

1465
01:06:40,320 --> 01:06:42,120
Speaker 2: Like what is your like when if you if you

1466
01:06:42,160 --> 01:06:45,000
Speaker 2: have a client that is a Mara cannabis user, like,

1467
01:06:46,120 --> 01:06:47,600
Speaker 2: do you what is it?

1468
01:06:47,840 --> 01:06:47,960
Speaker 4: Can?

1469
01:06:48,120 --> 01:06:48,280
Speaker 5: Do you?

1470
01:06:48,320 --> 01:06:50,200
Speaker 2: Can they smoke during pregnancy? Under you know?

1471
01:06:50,280 --> 01:06:51,920
Speaker 1: What are your what are yours?

1472
01:06:52,000 --> 01:06:52,200
Speaker 5: On that?

1473
01:06:52,440 --> 01:06:54,959
Speaker 1: It's different for us as black people as in all things.

1474
01:06:55,520 --> 01:06:59,920
Speaker 1: So the first home birth that I went to as

1475
01:07:00,360 --> 01:07:03,080
Speaker 1: like a student midwife, an apprentice studying to become a midwife,

1476
01:07:03,680 --> 01:07:06,920
Speaker 1: Like the dad was smoking a blunt and like she

1477
01:07:07,080 --> 01:07:10,320
Speaker 1: was hitting it every three or four contractions and pushed

1478
01:07:10,360 --> 01:07:12,840
Speaker 1: the baby out that was fully alert, screaming and hollering,

1479
01:07:13,440 --> 01:07:15,520
Speaker 1: and she was like, yeah, I couldn't have gotten through

1480
01:07:15,520 --> 01:07:18,280
Speaker 1: that labor without it. When I went to Midwiffrey School,

1481
01:07:18,320 --> 01:07:21,200
Speaker 1: which was predominantly white, I was the only black person.

1482
01:07:21,360 --> 01:07:23,920
Speaker 1: There was a brown person in the class ahead of me,

1483
01:07:24,280 --> 01:07:26,120
Speaker 1: but prior to BEI there hadn't been a black student

1484
01:07:26,200 --> 01:07:30,400
Speaker 1: in I think five years or ten years all the

1485
01:07:30,440 --> 01:07:34,160
Speaker 1: white midwives. It was in the protocols like if someone

1486
01:07:34,240 --> 01:07:36,640
Speaker 1: is having a hard early pregnancy and can't keep food

1487
01:07:36,720 --> 01:07:38,680
Speaker 1: down and is suffering from nauja obomiting to the point

1488
01:07:38,720 --> 01:07:41,280
Speaker 1: of losing weight, suggests cannabis. Like that was a part

1489
01:07:41,280 --> 01:07:42,160
Speaker 1: of Midwiffrees School.

1490
01:07:42,520 --> 01:07:44,960
Speaker 2: Like Old in Texas, old.

1491
01:07:44,800 --> 01:07:48,400
Speaker 1: White women in the seventies was smoking weight during their pregnancies,

1492
01:07:48,480 --> 01:07:50,320
Speaker 1: during their birthday and so we're black people. Its just said,

1493
01:07:50,320 --> 01:07:52,240
Speaker 1: black people, we were gonna go to the town for it.

1494
01:07:52,720 --> 01:07:55,000
Speaker 1: And it's the same thing now, Like I have clients

1495
01:07:55,560 --> 01:07:58,560
Speaker 1: that I have white clients that had the full on

1496
01:07:58,720 --> 01:08:02,120
Speaker 1: like the volcano, like looks like a giant, oh, the

1497
01:08:02,400 --> 01:08:04,720
Speaker 1: puffy bag and you know it's super fancy. I think

1498
01:08:04,720 --> 01:08:06,959
Speaker 1: it's like a thousand dollars and you burn the weed

1499
01:08:07,080 --> 01:08:09,080
Speaker 1: and it turns it into vaine. But it turns into

1500
01:08:09,120 --> 01:08:12,000
Speaker 1: like a giant air balloon and then they're like huffing

1501
01:08:12,080 --> 01:08:13,440
Speaker 1: on it and then they put a cap on it

1502
01:08:13,480 --> 01:08:15,560
Speaker 1: and it keeps it safe in this little baggy. And

1503
01:08:15,640 --> 01:08:21,240
Speaker 1: I've had it's super fancy, classic shit, super classy. It's

1504
01:08:21,320 --> 01:08:24,080
Speaker 1: non bong, it's vape. It's like the original vape.

1505
01:08:24,080 --> 01:08:24,320
Speaker 2: Okay.

1506
01:08:24,680 --> 01:08:27,679
Speaker 1: And I had clients, you know, in labor, white clients

1507
01:08:27,720 --> 01:08:30,639
Speaker 1: in labor totally just gone to the wind having these

1508
01:08:30,760 --> 01:08:33,680
Speaker 1: you know, super trippy quote unquote births, and I was

1509
01:08:33,760 --> 01:08:35,120
Speaker 1: just like whatever, And I knew if we went to

1510
01:08:35,160 --> 01:08:37,160
Speaker 1: the hospital, and they knew if they went to the hospital,

1511
01:08:37,160 --> 01:08:39,600
Speaker 1: because I of course give true informed consent, that it

1512
01:08:39,840 --> 01:08:43,439
Speaker 1: might be problematic. And I've had white clients faded to

1513
01:08:43,479 --> 01:08:45,880
Speaker 1: the skies roll into the hospital because for whatever reason,

1514
01:08:45,920 --> 01:08:47,519
Speaker 1: we rolled in and never got a.

1515
01:08:47,560 --> 01:08:51,479
Speaker 3: Drug to us, never gotta So you've seen that it's

1516
01:08:51,520 --> 01:08:54,519
Speaker 3: not equal and it's not just like standard, because I

1517
01:08:54,600 --> 01:08:56,080
Speaker 3: think I was afraid of that. That was one thing.

1518
01:08:56,080 --> 01:08:57,639
Speaker 2: I was like, I'm not gonna doctor stuffing smoking.

1519
01:08:57,640 --> 01:08:59,240
Speaker 3: And I smelled a lot of my pregnant scene that

1520
01:08:59,360 --> 01:09:01,880
Speaker 3: I remember friend of mine in Atlanta who had had

1521
01:09:01,920 --> 01:09:04,800
Speaker 3: a lot of kids, had given birth and when they

1522
01:09:05,160 --> 01:09:07,639
Speaker 3: tested her or the baby there was whatever.

1523
01:09:07,880 --> 01:09:10,160
Speaker 2: PhD came, yeah, like, I don't.

1524
01:09:10,040 --> 01:09:12,000
Speaker 3: Even if all her kids were fine, but I think

1525
01:09:12,080 --> 01:09:14,400
Speaker 3: she they didn't take her kid, but she had to

1526
01:09:14,479 --> 01:09:17,640
Speaker 3: go to some program and like it was there was

1527
01:09:17,680 --> 01:09:20,120
Speaker 3: a threat to or something. And I remember thinking, Oh,

1528
01:09:20,320 --> 01:09:23,280
Speaker 3: if this happens to me, I'm leaving taking my kid

1529
01:09:23,320 --> 01:09:23,840
Speaker 3: and we're out.

1530
01:09:24,400 --> 01:09:25,920
Speaker 2: I thought about that for a lot of reasons. What

1531
01:09:26,000 --> 01:09:28,720
Speaker 2: about breastfeeding, because I think that's when I encounter a

1532
01:09:28,760 --> 01:09:33,479
Speaker 2: lot of women ask even us too, because because we

1533
01:09:33,600 --> 01:09:34,840
Speaker 2: I mean, I know you have, but like I'm just

1534
01:09:34,920 --> 01:09:37,479
Speaker 2: curious to like what what you tell other women too.

1535
01:09:37,520 --> 01:09:40,840
Speaker 1: I mean, so it's tricky because licensed midwives in the

1536
01:09:40,920 --> 01:09:43,320
Speaker 1: state of California, we're licensed on the same board as

1537
01:09:43,360 --> 01:09:46,759
Speaker 1: the obgui NS, the medical board, so we're mandated reporters.

1538
01:09:47,320 --> 01:09:49,479
Speaker 1: Mandated we're supposed to report on anything where a child

1539
01:09:49,600 --> 01:09:52,240
Speaker 1: is being endangered or a person is being endangered. And

1540
01:09:52,760 --> 01:09:55,920
Speaker 1: I can say with pride, I've only ever had to

1541
01:09:55,960 --> 01:09:59,040
Speaker 1: call child Protective Services or a services agency twice in

1542
01:09:59,120 --> 01:10:01,080
Speaker 1: all of my years of Midwe free and it was

1543
01:10:01,200 --> 01:10:04,719
Speaker 1: where like literally the person they did not have heat,

1544
01:10:04,920 --> 01:10:07,479
Speaker 1: they did not have running water, they were basically squatting

1545
01:10:07,520 --> 01:10:10,000
Speaker 1: in a house and I went there for the home

1546
01:10:10,080 --> 01:10:13,280
Speaker 1: visit prior to birthing and was like, yo, y'all can't

1547
01:10:13,280 --> 01:10:16,080
Speaker 1: have a baby here, like this isn't safe for you, right,

1548
01:10:16,320 --> 01:10:18,120
Speaker 1: and they were just like, this is what we can afford.

1549
01:10:18,160 --> 01:10:19,960
Speaker 1: This is what we're gonna do. And I was like, okay, well,

1550
01:10:20,040 --> 01:10:22,240
Speaker 1: you got to figure out hot water and electricity before

1551
01:10:22,280 --> 01:10:24,479
Speaker 1: we have a baby here. I don't know what they did,

1552
01:10:24,520 --> 01:10:26,519
Speaker 1: if they jerry rigged it, but they had it. But then,

1553
01:10:26,640 --> 01:10:29,679
Speaker 1: like four days postpartum, I smelled gas in the house

1554
01:10:30,720 --> 01:10:34,000
Speaker 1: and I'm like, you're getting poisoned right now, you and

1555
01:10:34,080 --> 01:10:36,599
Speaker 1: the baby are getting poisoned. And they were and they

1556
01:10:36,640 --> 01:10:38,600
Speaker 1: were just like, yeah, there's nothing we could do about that.

1557
01:10:39,000 --> 01:10:40,720
Speaker 1: And I was like yeah, all for real. It's like, hey, God,

1558
01:10:40,880 --> 01:10:42,559
Speaker 1: like you could die, Like you got to get out

1559
01:10:42,600 --> 01:10:44,080
Speaker 1: of here. They couldn't get out and I was like,

1560
01:10:44,240 --> 01:10:46,439
Speaker 1: I'm not calling cho protype services on you, but I'm

1561
01:10:46,439 --> 01:10:48,120
Speaker 1: telling you right now, if you don't get this baby

1562
01:10:48,120 --> 01:10:49,880
Speaker 1: out here, even at your mama's house, your cousin's house,

1563
01:10:49,920 --> 01:10:53,360
Speaker 1: your auntie's house, and well the the snooty fox on

1564
01:10:53,439 --> 01:10:57,599
Speaker 1: Western like wherever you got too, because this is not okay,

1565
01:10:57,840 --> 01:10:59,880
Speaker 1: and so they did. They figured it out and got out.

1566
01:11:00,000 --> 01:11:04,360
Speaker 1: But with that being said, I cannot legally say, oh,

1567
01:11:04,439 --> 01:11:05,800
Speaker 1: it's perfectly fine if you smoke weed.

1568
01:11:06,120 --> 01:11:06,800
Speaker 2: I can't say that.

1569
01:11:07,200 --> 01:11:09,080
Speaker 1: But what I can do is point you to the

1570
01:11:09,160 --> 01:11:11,839
Speaker 1: realities of being a black person that smokes weed while pregnant,

1571
01:11:12,160 --> 01:11:14,800
Speaker 1: while lactating, while trying to get pregnant. And that is,

1572
01:11:15,560 --> 01:11:18,720
Speaker 1: if at any point you come in contact with medical professionals,

1573
01:11:18,760 --> 01:11:21,080
Speaker 1: they're absolutely gonna drug test you, regardless of what your

1574
01:11:21,160 --> 01:11:23,439
Speaker 1: name is, who you are, what your HMO is, how

1575
01:11:23,520 --> 01:11:25,680
Speaker 1: big your diamond is, how tall your person is, that's

1576
01:11:25,760 --> 01:11:27,960
Speaker 1: with you. They don't care. They just automatically do it

1577
01:11:28,000 --> 01:11:31,160
Speaker 1: to all black people. And so you have to take

1578
01:11:31,200 --> 01:11:33,600
Speaker 1: those things into consideration. We know that THHD stays in

1579
01:11:33,640 --> 01:11:35,840
Speaker 1: the system for thirty days, So if you go on

1580
01:11:35,880 --> 01:11:38,120
Speaker 1: your little thirty day fast right before your baby comes.

1581
01:11:37,960 --> 01:11:39,679
Speaker 2: I'm just more worried that I'm not worried.

1582
01:11:39,960 --> 01:11:41,640
Speaker 1: I'm not not worried that it's like gonna affect it

1583
01:11:41,960 --> 01:11:43,040
Speaker 1: does affect the baby, because that.

1584
01:11:43,040 --> 01:11:49,920
Speaker 2: There's so many because they're not but you just touch

1585
01:11:50,000 --> 01:11:53,280
Speaker 2: your test. I just want there's some article that I

1586
01:11:53,360 --> 01:11:55,720
Speaker 2: have not seen because I feel there's not there's like

1587
01:11:55,920 --> 01:11:56,320
Speaker 2: really no.

1588
01:11:56,600 --> 01:12:00,760
Speaker 1: Proven saying that it's bad. But if you find article now,

1589
01:12:00,920 --> 01:12:03,920
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say it's probably written by a white person

1590
01:12:04,280 --> 01:12:07,439
Speaker 1: who is in the medical field who does not support

1591
01:12:07,600 --> 01:12:11,679
Speaker 1: a PC being in a person's body, like they see

1592
01:12:11,920 --> 01:12:14,519
Speaker 1: weed as a gateway drug, even though now we have

1593
01:12:14,720 --> 01:12:16,520
Speaker 1: like basically apple stores.

1594
01:12:16,200 --> 01:12:19,439
Speaker 6: That are for weed right in that part. So this

1595
01:12:19,600 --> 01:12:21,680
Speaker 6: is what I can say, in all my years.

1596
01:12:21,439 --> 01:12:25,720
Speaker 7: Of supporting families that smoked or fate or consumed take

1597
01:12:25,760 --> 01:12:28,280
Speaker 7: sure whatever way of getting THHD canvas in their.

1598
01:12:28,200 --> 01:12:31,920
Speaker 1: Body, the babies have been fine. I've never had a

1599
01:12:32,000 --> 01:12:35,280
Speaker 1: baby with like depressed breathing. I've never seen a baby

1600
01:12:35,360 --> 01:12:37,600
Speaker 1: that like you know, struggles her focused or.

1601
01:12:37,600 --> 01:12:40,160
Speaker 7: Didn't learn how to walk because their person that was

1602
01:12:40,200 --> 01:12:41,000
Speaker 7: smoking weed.

1603
01:12:40,880 --> 01:12:42,439
Speaker 6: Or vaping or whatever was breastfeeding them.

1604
01:12:43,160 --> 01:12:45,360
Speaker 1: The only thing I've ever seen, and it was actually

1605
01:12:45,360 --> 01:12:47,639
Speaker 1: a white client many many years ago, and I think

1606
01:12:48,400 --> 01:12:50,040
Speaker 1: I think I have the theory around this.

1607
01:12:50,479 --> 01:12:53,080
Speaker 7: She smoked every day of her pregnancy, she grew in

1608
01:12:53,160 --> 01:12:55,160
Speaker 7: her backyard, and then after she had a raby, she

1609
01:12:55,240 --> 01:12:57,639
Speaker 7: smoked every day that she was breastfeeding from the weed

1610
01:12:57,760 --> 01:13:01,840
Speaker 7: in her backyard. But she also love dairy, so her

1611
01:13:01,960 --> 01:13:04,760
Speaker 7: kids were snotty, nanty boogery all the.

1612
01:13:04,800 --> 01:13:06,280
Speaker 4: Time, and she's like, I don't know why my kids

1613
01:13:06,320 --> 01:13:09,840
Speaker 4: are so Luca, see it's the weed. And I'm like, well,

1614
01:13:09,880 --> 01:13:13,280
Speaker 4: I think maybe it's the dairy twitter. So that's the

1615
01:13:13,400 --> 01:13:15,120
Speaker 4: only Like I've never had.

1616
01:13:15,000 --> 01:13:18,280
Speaker 8: Someone who had a child with eating issues, sleeping issues,

1617
01:13:18,479 --> 01:13:23,720
Speaker 8: or emotional issues while their parents consuming cannabis and you know, breastfeeding,

1618
01:13:23,960 --> 01:13:25,040
Speaker 8: chest feeding, humping bill.

1619
01:13:25,160 --> 01:13:26,720
Speaker 2: I just feel like it's important for our listeners to

1620
01:13:26,720 --> 01:13:28,000
Speaker 2: know because they don't know Luna.

1621
01:13:27,920 --> 01:13:29,639
Speaker 6: You know what I mean, and like they want to perfect.

1622
01:13:29,840 --> 01:13:31,840
Speaker 6: I'm just but they was like, you know, and they just.

1623
01:13:31,880 --> 01:13:32,240
Speaker 2: Want to know.

1624
01:13:32,520 --> 01:13:35,479
Speaker 6: Like obviously obviously you can't say like this is this

1625
01:13:35,640 --> 01:13:36,719
Speaker 6: is it, but like in your.

1626
01:13:36,640 --> 01:13:38,479
Speaker 2: Experience, like you can have encountered anything.

1627
01:13:38,479 --> 01:13:40,240
Speaker 6: I think a lot of women are always so I

1628
01:13:40,360 --> 01:13:42,639
Speaker 6: we have messages all the time about it and they're

1629
01:13:42,680 --> 01:13:44,120
Speaker 6: like scared, Oh, that's okay.

1630
01:13:44,560 --> 01:13:46,360
Speaker 2: We also say, like we even ever.

1631
01:13:46,320 --> 01:13:48,960
Speaker 6: Told the girl that we were eavesdropping on like the

1632
01:13:49,040 --> 01:13:49,840
Speaker 6: futures of smoke.

1633
01:13:50,000 --> 01:13:51,960
Speaker 2: Just don't share it with you with everyone because everyone's

1634
01:13:51,960 --> 01:13:53,599
Speaker 2: gonna have a tiny tak it. But that's what that's

1635
01:13:53,600 --> 01:13:54,960
Speaker 2: the kind of person you are I'm the type of

1636
01:13:55,000 --> 01:13:56,479
Speaker 2: person you can tell what the.

1637
01:13:56,560 --> 01:13:59,960
Speaker 3: Sky is red if I said it's purple, bitch, it's purple.

1638
01:14:00,880 --> 01:14:01,400
Speaker 1: So I don't.

1639
01:14:01,400 --> 01:14:02,960
Speaker 3: I don't argue with other people, and I didn't tell

1640
01:14:03,040 --> 01:14:04,840
Speaker 3: some people like I'll tell my mom right now.

1641
01:14:05,160 --> 01:14:08,559
Speaker 2: Vaccinations came up yesterday and Child, I said, I don't.

1642
01:14:08,360 --> 01:14:10,680
Speaker 6: Want to talk about it. She immediately I'm met.

1643
01:14:10,680 --> 01:14:12,760
Speaker 2: I said, I'm not getting defensive. I'm just not told that.

1644
01:14:12,800 --> 01:14:14,320
Speaker 6: It's a whole other thing. I mean even like that's

1645
01:14:14,320 --> 01:14:15,240
Speaker 6: a whole of the podcast.

1646
01:14:15,439 --> 01:14:19,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, I have something yesterday because I took my daughter to.

1647
01:14:19,200 --> 01:14:21,759
Speaker 2: The doctor and I said, you know what, if I asked,

1648
01:14:21,800 --> 01:14:24,320
Speaker 2: are following, like what is their views a vaccination?

1649
01:14:24,439 --> 01:14:27,760
Speaker 6: Let's be nice? And this is my CVD for my

1650
01:14:27,840 --> 01:14:30,720
Speaker 6: cramps that I'm raging right now, so gonna just like

1651
01:14:30,800 --> 01:14:34,799
Speaker 6: let's be nice. Yeah, that is a whole other episode.

1652
01:14:34,920 --> 01:14:37,200
Speaker 6: But it's a very sensi subjection everything.

1653
01:14:38,479 --> 01:14:41,360
Speaker 5: Oh lord, child, you don't have to don't. I don't,

1654
01:14:41,479 --> 01:14:48,320
Speaker 5: So I don't want to, that's right. I mean I'm

1655
01:14:48,439 --> 01:14:49,320
Speaker 5: more than happy to share.

1656
01:14:50,960 --> 01:14:51,280
Speaker 6: Uhh.

1657
01:14:54,080 --> 01:14:57,960
Speaker 1: I mean no, we're just running like, yeah, I don't

1658
01:14:57,960 --> 01:14:59,960
Speaker 1: wrap it upisode just because I could remember running ass

1659
01:15:00,000 --> 01:15:00,920
Speaker 1: based on my computer again.

1660
01:15:01,000 --> 01:15:04,519
Speaker 6: Oops, okay, so really quickly vaccines. I feel like.

1661
01:15:06,439 --> 01:15:08,840
Speaker 1: No one should be told what to put in their

1662
01:15:08,920 --> 01:15:16,960
Speaker 1: child's body if if the repercussions are oh oops, too bad.

1663
01:15:18,320 --> 01:15:21,760
Speaker 7: So this is goes for vaccinations, This goes for we,

1664
01:15:22,080 --> 01:15:24,360
Speaker 7: this goes for title and all this goes for benadraux.

1665
01:15:24,760 --> 01:15:28,120
Speaker 6: If I put something in my child's body because you

1666
01:15:28,200 --> 01:15:31,280
Speaker 6: tell me I have to and my child gets sick,

1667
01:15:31,360 --> 01:15:34,040
Speaker 6: gets injured, gets harmed by it, and your response to

1668
01:15:34,160 --> 01:15:37,479
Speaker 6: it is too bad, but you're gonna say I absolutely

1669
01:15:37,520 --> 01:15:38,080
Speaker 6: have to do it.

1670
01:15:39,560 --> 01:15:41,800
Speaker 1: No, here's an account of that's a that's a note

1671
01:15:42,040 --> 01:15:44,040
Speaker 1: because if I do something because you tell me I

1672
01:15:44,160 --> 01:15:46,880
Speaker 1: have to do it and something terrible happens to my child,

1673
01:15:47,560 --> 01:15:50,280
Speaker 1: and in very very tiny, small fine print it says, but.

1674
01:15:50,320 --> 01:15:52,240
Speaker 6: You can't see us if something goes bad, that's a

1675
01:15:52,400 --> 01:15:54,240
Speaker 6: that's going to be a no. That's going to be

1676
01:15:54,280 --> 01:15:54,439
Speaker 6: a no.

1677
01:15:54,720 --> 01:15:57,880
Speaker 1: I need to be able to have the ability to

1678
01:15:58,000 --> 01:16:00,920
Speaker 1: be financially compensated to now to take care of constantly

1679
01:16:00,960 --> 01:16:05,160
Speaker 1: a compromise or or sick or child because of following

1680
01:16:05,240 --> 01:16:07,519
Speaker 1: your directions where you said I don't have a say so,

1681
01:16:07,680 --> 01:16:10,160
Speaker 1: like I have to do this thing. That's my biggest thing.

1682
01:16:10,360 --> 01:16:12,559
Speaker 1: That's it. At the end of the day, I need

1683
01:16:12,720 --> 01:16:14,800
Speaker 1: someone to be able to say, well, if this doesn't

1684
01:16:14,840 --> 01:16:16,720
Speaker 1: work out, these are our other options, and this is

1685
01:16:16,760 --> 01:16:18,320
Speaker 1: how we'll support you, and this is what will do

1686
01:16:18,400 --> 01:16:18,920
Speaker 1: for your baby.

1687
01:16:19,160 --> 01:16:20,280
Speaker 2: But that is not the case.

1688
01:16:21,080 --> 01:16:28,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, I have one more question, how what is your

1689
01:16:28,880 --> 01:16:31,320
Speaker 3: take we were talking about before you came, Like, so

1690
01:16:31,520 --> 01:16:34,320
Speaker 3: one of my best friends who had multiple home births,

1691
01:16:34,560 --> 01:16:37,280
Speaker 3: twins and another daughter, and then most recently she was

1692
01:16:37,320 --> 01:16:39,160
Speaker 3: pregnant I think two years ago and she went all

1693
01:16:39,200 --> 01:16:41,800
Speaker 3: the way full term and the baby, she gave birth

1694
01:16:41,840 --> 01:16:44,400
Speaker 3: to the baby and he had no heartbeat, so shep.

1695
01:16:44,240 --> 01:16:44,920
Speaker 2: Up by the hospital.

1696
01:16:45,960 --> 01:16:49,240
Speaker 3: What's your which like just in general, like how many

1697
01:16:49,320 --> 01:16:52,000
Speaker 3: have you ever had any still births in your experience?

1698
01:16:52,479 --> 01:16:54,920
Speaker 2: Yea, And how how did those people cope through it?

1699
01:16:55,040 --> 01:16:57,840
Speaker 2: Or what is your like If people say, like it's

1700
01:16:57,880 --> 01:16:58,760
Speaker 2: because you had a home.

1701
01:16:58,680 --> 01:17:01,560
Speaker 1: Birth, you've had a still birth, It's horrific. It's the

1702
01:17:01,640 --> 01:17:05,639
Speaker 1: hardest thing that any person that has to be pregnant

1703
01:17:05,680 --> 01:17:07,479
Speaker 1: and go through that could ever go through. No one

1704
01:17:07,520 --> 01:17:11,640
Speaker 1: can tell them anything. It is the most difficult thing

1705
01:17:11,760 --> 01:17:14,960
Speaker 1: for a midwife to go through in there in our

1706
01:17:15,040 --> 01:17:18,519
Speaker 1: work because even though we're licensed health care providers, were

1707
01:17:18,600 --> 01:17:22,000
Speaker 1: not seen as healthcare providers in the medical system, and so.

1708
01:17:22,840 --> 01:17:23,519
Speaker 3: There is no.

1709
01:17:25,080 --> 01:17:27,920
Speaker 1: Paid time off for therapy and for wellness and for

1710
01:17:28,080 --> 01:17:31,720
Speaker 1: recovering from your own trauma of experiencing it. So midwives,

1711
01:17:32,040 --> 01:17:34,920
Speaker 1: homework midwives specifically you, if you go through that, you

1712
01:17:35,680 --> 01:17:37,519
Speaker 1: it's all on you to heal from that, to be

1713
01:17:37,560 --> 01:17:39,800
Speaker 1: able to show up for other people and not operate

1714
01:17:39,840 --> 01:17:42,640
Speaker 1: from a place of fear and thinking that everyone's you

1715
01:17:42,680 --> 01:17:45,160
Speaker 1: already have other clients, not like, Okay, sorry, we have death.

1716
01:17:45,280 --> 01:17:46,160
Speaker 2: I need to take a break.

1717
01:17:47,320 --> 01:17:50,000
Speaker 1: And I will tell you that it was with the

1718
01:17:50,280 --> 01:17:53,160
Speaker 1: wonderful training of that original white midwife and some other

1719
01:17:53,200 --> 01:17:57,360
Speaker 1: white midwives that I learned that early on is that

1720
01:17:57,520 --> 01:17:59,160
Speaker 1: you have to be able to step away and get

1721
01:17:59,200 --> 01:18:01,840
Speaker 1: yourself together because you can't bring that into somebody else's birth.

1722
01:18:02,360 --> 01:18:05,439
Speaker 1: But back to your actual question, Yes, I have supportive

1723
01:18:05,479 --> 01:18:08,160
Speaker 1: families that had babies that died before they were even

1724
01:18:08,240 --> 01:18:10,400
Speaker 1: went into labor. I've been with families that were in

1725
01:18:10,520 --> 01:18:11,080
Speaker 1: labor and their.

1726
01:18:11,000 --> 01:18:12,080
Speaker 2: Baby died, and.

1727
01:18:13,720 --> 01:18:17,519
Speaker 1: In some of those instances, well, actually no, in all

1728
01:18:17,560 --> 01:18:20,400
Speaker 1: of those instances, if they had been at the hospital,

1729
01:18:21,120 --> 01:18:24,680
Speaker 1: it was a very slim likelihood that we would have

1730
01:18:24,760 --> 01:18:27,519
Speaker 1: still had a live baby. If we had we might

1731
01:18:27,560 --> 01:18:30,559
Speaker 1: have had a live baby that was compromised, meaning brain damage,

1732
01:18:31,120 --> 01:18:34,320
Speaker 1: or you know, just have just not be the baby

1733
01:18:34,360 --> 01:18:36,560
Speaker 1: that they would be if they had been born, you know,

1734
01:18:36,640 --> 01:18:37,880
Speaker 1: maybe a week early.

1735
01:18:38,200 --> 01:18:38,479
Speaker 3: So like.

1736
01:18:40,800 --> 01:18:43,440
Speaker 1: The whole entire time you're pregnant, there is the possibility

1737
01:18:43,479 --> 01:18:45,880
Speaker 1: of your baby not meeting you at the end with

1738
01:18:45,960 --> 01:18:48,639
Speaker 1: their beautiful little face and lungs full of oxygen. That's

1739
01:18:48,680 --> 01:18:50,519
Speaker 1: always the case. I tell people, from the moment you

1740
01:18:50,600 --> 01:18:53,559
Speaker 1: decide to be pregnant, all bets are off, and nobody

1741
01:18:53,560 --> 01:18:55,280
Speaker 1: wants to hear that, but that is the reality of

1742
01:18:55,280 --> 01:18:57,479
Speaker 1: the situation. And so we have people that they never

1743
01:18:57,520 --> 01:18:59,600
Speaker 1: even get to thirty weeks and then their baby just

1744
01:18:59,640 --> 01:19:02,439
Speaker 1: doesn't have a heartbeat, and then they have to decide

1745
01:19:02,479 --> 01:19:03,840
Speaker 1: how they want to go forward with that. Do they

1746
01:19:03,880 --> 01:19:05,120
Speaker 1: want to push that baby out at home, in the

1747
01:19:05,160 --> 01:19:09,360
Speaker 1: safety of their own place and experience that intimate experience

1748
01:19:09,479 --> 01:19:11,200
Speaker 1: in a place that feels safe to them. Are they

1749
01:19:11,520 --> 01:19:13,560
Speaker 1: going to go to the hospital and be induced or

1750
01:19:13,880 --> 01:19:16,960
Speaker 1: some people's insurance is really fucked up and will be like, Okay,

1751
01:19:17,080 --> 01:19:18,559
Speaker 1: well you just have to wait till you go into

1752
01:19:18,600 --> 01:19:20,240
Speaker 1: labor because we're not going to pay for anything else.

1753
01:19:21,600 --> 01:19:25,560
Speaker 1: So there's that for the families where it was just

1754
01:19:25,680 --> 01:19:31,880
Speaker 1: something that just happened, you know, in the hospital, maybe

1755
01:19:31,920 --> 01:19:35,320
Speaker 1: it would be a crash sea section. Maybe because what

1756
01:19:35,400 --> 01:19:38,439
Speaker 1: people also forget is that the time from oh shit,

1757
01:19:38,600 --> 01:19:41,280
Speaker 1: something's wrong in the hospital to we're gonna get you

1758
01:19:41,320 --> 01:19:43,599
Speaker 1: in the r and do a crash sea section, that's

1759
01:19:43,720 --> 01:19:47,519
Speaker 1: still anywhere from ten to thirty minutes. They'll tell you

1760
01:19:47,800 --> 01:19:49,880
Speaker 1: in the private prenatal appointments of your doctor, oh, if

1761
01:19:49,880 --> 01:19:50,920
Speaker 1: we need to get your baby out, we can get

1762
01:19:50,920 --> 01:19:53,120
Speaker 1: your baby out like this. But the reality is is

1763
01:19:53,240 --> 01:19:56,000
Speaker 1: like if you haven't had enough IV fluids, if you

1764
01:19:56,080 --> 01:19:58,200
Speaker 1: know you're in a certain position, or if you don't

1765
01:19:58,240 --> 01:20:00,599
Speaker 1: have an IV or you've been laboring with that an epidural,

1766
01:20:00,920 --> 01:20:02,600
Speaker 1: you know, there's a lot of other steps that have

1767
01:20:02,680 --> 01:20:05,160
Speaker 1: to happen. If there's nor open, you have to wait

1768
01:20:05,240 --> 01:20:07,479
Speaker 1: until there's an or open, and they don't take those

1769
01:20:07,520 --> 01:20:10,559
Speaker 1: things into consideration. Doctors have babies die all the time,

1770
01:20:10,760 --> 01:20:14,320
Speaker 1: but they're protected by the hospital, they're protected by their malpractice.

1771
01:20:14,720 --> 01:20:18,720
Speaker 1: They get time off and therapy and paid vacation to heal.

1772
01:20:19,120 --> 01:20:21,120
Speaker 1: If they feel like they need it if they feel

1773
01:20:21,160 --> 01:20:22,920
Speaker 1: like they experienced trauma. But for the most part, it

1774
01:20:23,080 --> 01:20:25,000
Speaker 1: was like, oh, that was gonna happen. There was nothing

1775
01:20:25,040 --> 01:20:28,479
Speaker 1: we could do about that. And in home birth, that

1776
01:20:28,720 --> 01:20:31,200
Speaker 1: is never allowed. It was it was because you were

1777
01:20:31,200 --> 01:20:34,720
Speaker 1: at home. It's because you had a midwife. It's never oh, well,

1778
01:20:34,760 --> 01:20:36,760
Speaker 1: you know, this would have happened at the hospital as well,

1779
01:20:36,880 --> 01:20:39,040
Speaker 1: and it would have been probably the same outcome. It's

1780
01:20:39,280 --> 01:20:42,200
Speaker 1: because you were at home. I had a client who

1781
01:20:43,920 --> 01:20:48,080
Speaker 1: had pushed out a baby after a c section, basically

1782
01:20:48,160 --> 01:20:50,280
Speaker 1: on a gurry, and her own doctor was like, Oh,

1783
01:20:50,400 --> 01:20:52,040
Speaker 1: you should just have your next one at the house

1784
01:20:52,040 --> 01:20:54,680
Speaker 1: because clearly like the babies want to come out of

1785
01:20:54,720 --> 01:20:58,840
Speaker 1: your vagina. And so they were scientists, not spiritual people,

1786
01:20:58,880 --> 01:21:00,880
Speaker 1: and so they've done all their research and the statistics,

1787
01:21:00,960 --> 01:21:03,880
Speaker 1: and the statistics are if you've pushed out a baby before,

1788
01:21:04,160 --> 01:21:06,759
Speaker 1: after you've had a c section, the likelihood that everything's

1789
01:21:06,800 --> 01:21:08,840
Speaker 1: gonna go right the next time after that is that

1790
01:21:08,920 --> 01:21:11,240
Speaker 1: it's gonna go right. The statistic, I think at the

1791
01:21:11,280 --> 01:21:15,320
Speaker 1: time was like zero point zero zero one, like super

1792
01:21:15,400 --> 01:21:16,760
Speaker 1: low that things will go wrong.

1793
01:21:17,200 --> 01:21:18,320
Speaker 2: And they were that statistic.

1794
01:21:19,080 --> 01:21:22,800
Speaker 1: And they lived approximately seven minutes from a hospital and

1795
01:21:23,360 --> 01:21:25,040
Speaker 1: I can't tell you the fuck shit we went through

1796
01:21:25,240 --> 01:21:26,200
Speaker 1: getting to the hospital.

1797
01:21:26,479 --> 01:21:27,439
Speaker 3: We had the.

1798
01:21:27,560 --> 01:21:30,120
Speaker 1: EMTs that we're trying to get iv in on the

1799
01:21:30,200 --> 01:21:32,800
Speaker 1: street while I'm screaming at them that you know, we

1800
01:21:32,880 --> 01:21:35,080
Speaker 1: gotta go, like this baby's heart rate, I still have it,

1801
01:21:35,400 --> 01:21:37,960
Speaker 1: So let's go. And knowing that we're seven minutes in

1802
01:21:38,040 --> 01:21:40,280
Speaker 1: your everyday average car, but an ambulance that's probably like

1803
01:21:40,320 --> 01:21:43,320
Speaker 1: maybe three, right, right, maybe let's go. Then they finally

1804
01:21:43,400 --> 01:21:45,720
Speaker 1: get to the hospital and they take her to the

1805
01:21:45,800 --> 01:21:48,800
Speaker 1: emergency room. Nobody down there is doing births right, like,

1806
01:21:49,120 --> 01:21:52,200
Speaker 1: they're not managing. You're supposed to go directly the neighborom delivery.

1807
01:21:52,240 --> 01:21:53,880
Speaker 1: So then by the time they get to labor and delivery,

1808
01:21:54,040 --> 01:21:56,840
Speaker 1: the ultrasimographers like, yeah, I don't see a heart rate.

1809
01:22:00,000 --> 01:22:06,400
Speaker 1: So and truthfully, the ultrasnographer couldn't truthfully diagnose the position

1810
01:22:06,520 --> 01:22:09,080
Speaker 1: of the baby because they were not skilled enough and

1811
01:22:09,320 --> 01:22:11,760
Speaker 1: hadn't realized that the baby was no longer even in

1812
01:22:11,880 --> 01:22:16,200
Speaker 1: the uterus, because what happens is when the uterine scar opens,

1813
01:22:16,320 --> 01:22:19,479
Speaker 1: it's like kicking open the door of a plane mid flight.

1814
01:22:19,880 --> 01:22:22,439
Speaker 1: Shit's getting sucked out. And so this little person got

1815
01:22:22,479 --> 01:22:26,280
Speaker 1: sucked out and was inside of their parents like abdomen.

1816
01:22:27,680 --> 01:22:31,479
Speaker 1: That baby saved their parents' life though, because this very

1817
01:22:31,560 --> 01:22:33,640
Speaker 1: large vein. The reason why they're afraid of Vback's in

1818
01:22:33,680 --> 01:22:38,200
Speaker 1: the hospital is that if that scar opens, all of

1819
01:22:38,240 --> 01:22:39,720
Speaker 1: your blood flow is just gonna come out of there,

1820
01:22:39,760 --> 01:22:42,000
Speaker 1: and you're you're the parent that is pregnant is going

1821
01:22:42,080 --> 01:22:45,599
Speaker 1: to hemorrhag and die in a very short period of time. Well,

1822
01:22:45,640 --> 01:22:48,519
Speaker 1: this little tiny human came out of their their parents' womb,

1823
01:22:48,720 --> 01:22:50,960
Speaker 1: came out of their scar, and the way that their

1824
01:22:51,000 --> 01:22:55,400
Speaker 1: little head basically got forced into their ribs, it acted

1825
01:22:55,479 --> 01:22:58,760
Speaker 1: as basically a stopper. And so when they opened that

1826
01:22:58,840 --> 01:23:00,479
Speaker 1: person up for that sea section and to get the

1827
01:23:00,520 --> 01:23:02,599
Speaker 1: baby out, there was no blood. That baby had saved

1828
01:23:02,640 --> 01:23:06,799
Speaker 1: their parents' life. Wow, but this baby wasn't like ten pounds.

1829
01:23:06,880 --> 01:23:09,560
Speaker 1: This baby wasn't exponentially bigger than their previous sibling. And

1830
01:23:09,680 --> 01:23:14,200
Speaker 1: it had been many years and it just happened. I

1831
01:23:14,360 --> 01:23:18,679
Speaker 1: have I have never seen so many doctors shimmy around,

1832
01:23:19,160 --> 01:23:21,000
Speaker 1: uh w, wh what do we do?

1833
01:23:21,120 --> 01:23:21,640
Speaker 4: And what is this?

1834
01:23:21,760 --> 01:23:23,400
Speaker 1: And what well why was she having a homebird? Well,

1835
01:23:23,400 --> 01:23:26,000
Speaker 1: who's gonna do the C section? Like d No one

1836
01:23:26,040 --> 01:23:29,200
Speaker 1: at any point was like, we are so sorry, mm m,

1837
01:23:29,680 --> 01:23:32,400
Speaker 1: what can we do to make this as as healing

1838
01:23:32,439 --> 01:23:33,080
Speaker 1: as possible for you?

1839
01:23:33,240 --> 01:23:33,840
Speaker 3: Like, what can we Like?

1840
01:23:34,000 --> 01:23:37,080
Speaker 1: They were literally assholes until the day they left the hospital.

1841
01:23:37,120 --> 01:23:37,360
Speaker 2: Wow.

1842
01:23:38,800 --> 01:23:42,320
Speaker 1: So it does happen, and it's horrible and it's hard,

1843
01:23:42,479 --> 01:23:44,479
Speaker 1: and midwives talk about it, but we don't talk about

1844
01:23:44,479 --> 01:23:46,000
Speaker 1: it in a way that's like your baby's gonna die.

1845
01:23:46,360 --> 01:23:48,320
Speaker 1: It's when you first come into care. These are all

1846
01:23:48,320 --> 01:23:50,599
Speaker 1: the different things that could happen, but they could also

1847
01:23:50,600 --> 01:23:54,600
Speaker 1: happen in the hospital, and so you're choosing. You're choosing autonomy.

1848
01:23:54,680 --> 01:23:57,840
Speaker 1: And that's another piece is Midwiffrey. You have to have

1849
01:23:57,960 --> 01:24:00,559
Speaker 1: your own mind. You have to have like a clear

1850
01:24:00,600 --> 01:24:02,040
Speaker 1: idea of what it is that you want, and your

1851
01:24:02,080 --> 01:24:05,360
Speaker 1: midwife supports it. It is not midwives convincing people to

1852
01:24:05,439 --> 01:24:07,560
Speaker 1: have homebirth that really don't want to have home r

1853
01:24:08,200 --> 01:24:09,840
Speaker 1: it's showing up for people that are like I would

1854
01:24:09,880 --> 01:24:11,519
Speaker 1: do this even if you're not coming, but I would

1855
01:24:11,520 --> 01:24:12,240
Speaker 1: prefer if you were here.

1856
01:24:12,360 --> 01:24:14,200
Speaker 2: They're coming to you because they want that You're not

1857
01:24:14,280 --> 01:24:15,439
Speaker 2: seeking them out exactly.

1858
01:24:15,840 --> 01:24:17,920
Speaker 1: But sometimes people you know, oh, I saw the business

1859
01:24:17,960 --> 01:24:19,320
Speaker 1: of being born. I want to have a home birth,

1860
01:24:19,560 --> 01:24:21,479
Speaker 1: but don't want to take any liability. They want it

1861
01:24:21,520 --> 01:24:23,240
Speaker 1: to still be like the doctor, Well, tell me what

1862
01:24:23,360 --> 01:24:26,200
Speaker 1: to do with shaw, What would you do? What would

1863
01:24:26,240 --> 01:24:27,600
Speaker 1: you do? And I'm like, baby, this is not my

1864
01:24:27,720 --> 01:24:31,040
Speaker 1: pregnant yeah, like only you know. And I've had people

1865
01:24:31,240 --> 01:24:35,040
Speaker 1: sit across from me in labor and be like, I

1866
01:24:35,160 --> 01:24:37,320
Speaker 1: don't I don't know why this is, but I just

1867
01:24:37,400 --> 01:24:39,320
Speaker 1: think we should go. Like I just have a bad feeling,

1868
01:24:39,720 --> 01:24:41,880
Speaker 1: and a midwife, a good midwife is gonna listen to that.

1869
01:24:42,120 --> 01:24:44,120
Speaker 1: It doesn't matter if the bloodressre's great, the pulse is great,

1870
01:24:44,160 --> 01:24:46,840
Speaker 1: baby sounds great, Water's not broken, there's no temperature, there's

1871
01:24:46,840 --> 01:24:49,120
Speaker 1: no fever, there's nothing you've been eating drinking, everything's fine.

1872
01:24:49,280 --> 01:24:51,920
Speaker 1: When someone looks me in the face and goes, I

1873
01:24:52,080 --> 01:24:54,599
Speaker 1: just I think we should go. Every single time it's

1874
01:24:54,640 --> 01:24:57,439
Speaker 1: been absolutely appropriate. It was a baby that absolutely needs

1875
01:24:57,439 --> 01:24:58,800
Speaker 1: to be born in the hospital and we wouldn't have

1876
01:24:58,840 --> 01:25:00,639
Speaker 1: known it until it was like time.

1877
01:25:01,479 --> 01:25:04,639
Speaker 2: And so that's another piece being heard from that other

1878
01:25:04,720 --> 01:25:07,840
Speaker 2: place of well, taking off your like midwife hot or

1879
01:25:07,880 --> 01:25:09,080
Speaker 2: not taking it off. You don't ever take it off.

1880
01:25:09,160 --> 01:25:10,760
Speaker 2: It's a part of it, but taking off of like

1881
01:25:10,920 --> 01:25:13,680
Speaker 2: making it about you and your personally. This journey that

1882
01:25:13,720 --> 01:25:15,679
Speaker 2: you've taken with this person, and you want to complete

1883
01:25:15,720 --> 01:25:18,280
Speaker 2: the journey this way and listening to.

1884
01:25:18,400 --> 01:25:20,880
Speaker 3: What at all times, yeah, at all times, and also

1885
01:25:21,040 --> 01:25:25,320
Speaker 3: being comfortable enough to be instinctual about what it is

1886
01:25:25,720 --> 01:25:29,599
Speaker 3: that's nothing else. Your people underestimate their motherly instinct, your

1887
01:25:29,680 --> 01:25:30,320
Speaker 3: instinct as.

1888
01:25:30,200 --> 01:25:32,040
Speaker 2: A human, like sometimes things are gonna tell you no,

1889
01:25:32,240 --> 01:25:33,600
Speaker 2: somethings just don't feel right, and you need to be

1890
01:25:33,640 --> 01:25:34,880
Speaker 2: able to go with your gut and feel that and

1891
01:25:35,000 --> 01:25:36,519
Speaker 2: not and be in tune with yourself in.

1892
01:25:36,600 --> 01:25:37,479
Speaker 1: Order to figure that out.

1893
01:25:37,840 --> 01:25:38,040
Speaker 2: Well.

1894
01:25:38,600 --> 01:25:41,760
Speaker 1: So that's where racism keeps coming back into the conversation

1895
01:25:41,960 --> 01:25:47,080
Speaker 1: because Black people are basically taught from the beginning of time,

1896
01:25:47,160 --> 01:25:49,800
Speaker 1: from the moment we can get words and you know,

1897
01:25:49,960 --> 01:25:53,840
Speaker 1: communicate with others in the past, not now, not so

1898
01:25:53,960 --> 01:25:56,800
Speaker 1: much now. Hopefully black people are made to feel like

1899
01:25:56,880 --> 01:25:59,479
Speaker 1: we don't know as much we have. We So many

1900
01:25:59,640 --> 01:26:02,160
Speaker 1: of my peers, so many of people, black women, black

1901
01:26:02,680 --> 01:26:05,120
Speaker 1: folks that I look up to, they talk about in

1902
01:26:05,280 --> 01:26:09,760
Speaker 1: private struggling with imposter syndrome. And it literally is just

1903
01:26:09,920 --> 01:26:11,840
Speaker 1: that thing of black is not as good as white.

1904
01:26:12,360 --> 01:26:16,759
Speaker 1: And so midwives, black midwives specifically, we're wearing so many hats,

1905
01:26:16,800 --> 01:26:19,640
Speaker 1: but most of them are literally just combating years of

1906
01:26:19,800 --> 01:26:25,120
Speaker 1: racism and trauma. It's reminding you, you know your body,

1907
01:26:25,320 --> 01:26:27,760
Speaker 1: you are smart, you are not You don't have to

1908
01:26:27,800 --> 01:26:30,680
Speaker 1: be a doctor or a midwife to know something's not right,

1909
01:26:31,080 --> 01:26:34,640
Speaker 1: and that is good enough. And it's a shame for

1910
01:26:34,800 --> 01:26:36,799
Speaker 1: so many people that that's the only time that happens

1911
01:26:36,840 --> 01:26:39,280
Speaker 1: for them, And so I love it. There's this thing

1912
01:26:39,320 --> 01:26:42,200
Speaker 1: that happens sometimes in Midwiffrey where who comes to me

1913
01:26:42,280 --> 01:26:43,960
Speaker 1: in the beginning, The couple that shows up at the

1914
01:26:44,000 --> 01:26:46,040
Speaker 1: beginning is not the couple at the end, and sometimes

1915
01:26:46,080 --> 01:26:49,200
Speaker 1: the partner that was not pregnant is not really prepared

1916
01:26:49,240 --> 01:26:51,479
Speaker 1: for that new person that's shown up, which is this

1917
01:26:51,600 --> 01:26:54,400
Speaker 1: person that knows who they are, knows their power, knows

1918
01:26:54,439 --> 01:26:57,320
Speaker 1: what they're capable of, and is then on this like yeah,

1919
01:26:57,320 --> 01:27:00,880
Speaker 1: and I got this baby out of my vagina, and

1920
01:27:01,240 --> 01:27:04,000
Speaker 1: like before maybe was this person that was like, oh,

1921
01:27:04,120 --> 01:27:07,360
Speaker 1: sure you are, and now it's like get your own

1922
01:27:07,400 --> 01:27:12,439
Speaker 1: fucking donut here. It was like, oh, then I watch

1923
01:27:12,520 --> 01:27:14,280
Speaker 1: it happen and I love it. I live for that.

1924
01:27:14,520 --> 01:27:16,479
Speaker 1: I live for that, the moment where I watch them

1925
01:27:16,560 --> 01:27:20,639
Speaker 1: be like, oh, bitch, I got all the power. Yeah,

1926
01:27:21,479 --> 01:27:24,960
Speaker 1: I love it. But it is stressful and hard for

1927
01:27:25,000 --> 01:27:27,080
Speaker 1: the partners. And that's another part of my job as

1928
01:27:27,120 --> 01:27:29,640
Speaker 1: a midwife is to remind them like, you're still this

1929
01:27:29,760 --> 01:27:32,800
Speaker 1: person's person, but you now have to adjust how you

1930
01:27:32,920 --> 01:27:33,320
Speaker 1: see them.

1931
01:27:33,680 --> 01:27:36,360
Speaker 2: You saw what they went through. Now you need to

1932
01:27:36,960 --> 01:27:38,439
Speaker 2: you need to rise the case, you need to get

1933
01:27:38,479 --> 01:27:39,000
Speaker 2: to their level.

1934
01:27:39,080 --> 01:27:44,479
Speaker 1: And it's unfortunate. Sometimes home birth makes relationships not stronger.

1935
01:27:44,640 --> 01:27:47,280
Speaker 1: It challenges them in ways that the person that wasn't

1936
01:27:47,320 --> 01:27:50,000
Speaker 1: pregnant is not prepared for because you got a whole

1937
01:27:50,080 --> 01:27:53,639
Speaker 1: new boo now and and you know, there's that moment

1938
01:27:53,960 --> 01:27:55,880
Speaker 1: and sometimes it happens right away at the birthday, and

1939
01:27:55,960 --> 01:27:58,599
Speaker 1: sometimes it happens later because it's delayed because it's taken

1940
01:27:58,680 --> 01:28:01,120
Speaker 1: from us. But that moment where you were like, I

1941
01:28:01,200 --> 01:28:05,360
Speaker 1: won't murder everyone person right, I will kill you, And

1942
01:28:06,040 --> 01:28:08,960
Speaker 1: sometimes our partners they are just like, WHOA for you?

1943
01:28:09,120 --> 01:28:09,479
Speaker 2: I don't.

1944
01:28:10,040 --> 01:28:10,560
Speaker 1: I don't like that.

1945
01:28:10,720 --> 01:28:11,560
Speaker 2: That doesn't work for me.

1946
01:28:12,520 --> 01:28:16,000
Speaker 1: So I love that part. I love I love watching

1947
01:28:16,120 --> 01:28:18,559
Speaker 1: people come into their power and realize how strong they

1948
01:28:18,600 --> 01:28:21,160
Speaker 1: are and how much say so they have and what

1949
01:28:21,280 --> 01:28:23,439
Speaker 1: they're really truly capable of. And it has nothing to

1950
01:28:23,520 --> 01:28:23,840
Speaker 1: do with me.

1951
01:28:24,200 --> 01:28:25,960
Speaker 2: I'm so happy that you do the work you do.

1952
01:28:26,040 --> 01:28:27,400
Speaker 2: I think I want to be in birth work. I

1953
01:28:27,479 --> 01:28:28,519
Speaker 2: said this like two weeks ago.

1954
01:28:29,120 --> 01:28:31,439
Speaker 1: You have to be prepared to literally have zero schedule

1955
01:28:31,560 --> 01:28:33,840
Speaker 1: and always be on call and never have no fun.

1956
01:28:34,040 --> 01:28:34,720
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, there's that.

1957
01:28:36,280 --> 01:28:39,640
Speaker 1: I mean, it's not never no fun, but it's like

1958
01:28:39,840 --> 01:28:42,439
Speaker 1: there are very small windows where I get to quote

1959
01:28:42,520 --> 01:28:45,240
Speaker 1: unquote turn up because there's always the possibility be present

1960
01:28:45,360 --> 01:28:47,599
Speaker 1: of someone calling me and being like, my water just broken,

1961
01:28:47,640 --> 01:28:49,880
Speaker 1: I'm twenty eight weeks Okay, well, well.

1962
01:28:50,560 --> 01:28:52,639
Speaker 2: This was fun. Hey let me put this shot down.

1963
01:28:52,800 --> 01:28:54,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, and now I got to go be at a

1964
01:28:54,479 --> 01:28:56,960
Speaker 1: hospital and advocate for this person to have as good

1965
01:28:56,960 --> 01:28:59,160
Speaker 1: a hospital birth as possible and for their baby to

1966
01:28:59,200 --> 01:29:01,320
Speaker 1: be respected to the of our abilities. Because now we're

1967
01:29:01,360 --> 01:29:02,880
Speaker 1: not having a home birth, we're going to be fighting

1968
01:29:02,960 --> 01:29:06,080
Speaker 1: for you know, maybe still a vaginal birth, maybe breastfeeding,

1969
01:29:06,120 --> 01:29:06,439
Speaker 1: still like.

1970
01:29:06,439 --> 01:29:09,679
Speaker 2: All these other things. The role of a black midwife

1971
01:29:09,720 --> 01:29:13,679
Speaker 2: is so very different than a white midwife. Well, thank

1972
01:29:13,760 --> 01:29:17,320
Speaker 2: you for what you do, and thank you for coming

1973
01:29:17,479 --> 01:29:21,040
Speaker 2: and sharing all of your knowledge and experience with our audience.

1974
01:29:21,439 --> 01:29:23,439
Speaker 2: And I get pregnant, you will be my midwife and

1975
01:29:23,920 --> 01:29:32,400
Speaker 2: she's available because you're going to get pregnant. I have

1976
01:29:32,479 --> 01:29:34,600
Speaker 2: that baby close to my baby because he's coming to me.

1977
01:29:35,000 --> 01:29:36,240
Speaker 2: I like, hi, Tamila's phone.

1978
01:29:39,040 --> 01:29:42,719
Speaker 1: I have had sisters like literally email me within months

1979
01:29:42,720 --> 01:29:45,800
Speaker 1: of each other about their pregnancies and they did hire me.

1980
01:29:45,840 --> 01:29:48,040
Speaker 1: And that was so much fun, so much fun.

1981
01:29:48,280 --> 01:29:50,960
Speaker 2: That's cool, that's awesome. Everybody where they can find you.

1982
01:29:51,360 --> 01:29:54,599
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, okay, that part. I'm terrible with this. Okay.

1983
01:29:55,840 --> 01:29:59,040
Speaker 1: Allegedly there's a Facebook, but I don't run it. My

1984
01:29:59,439 --> 01:30:02,360
Speaker 1: web mistress because they were like, you have to have

1985
01:30:02,360 --> 01:30:04,000
Speaker 1: a Facebook account, but I was like, I hate Facebook.

1986
01:30:04,000 --> 01:30:05,400
Speaker 1: I left years ago and they were like, just do

1987
01:30:05,439 --> 01:30:07,559
Speaker 1: it for the business. So there's a Facebook. I wouldn't

1988
01:30:07,560 --> 01:30:14,160
Speaker 1: recommend reaching out there. Mostly my website www dot crimsonfig

1989
01:30:14,439 --> 01:30:18,280
Speaker 1: dot com. I'm local to Los Angeles. You can google

1990
01:30:18,360 --> 01:30:22,280
Speaker 1: me Rashata Honey Lawler or the Black Midwife or Crimson

1991
01:30:22,360 --> 01:30:26,720
Speaker 1: Fig or Crimson Fig Midwife on Instagram, which I love

1992
01:30:26,760 --> 01:30:28,479
Speaker 1: because it's just pictures and a little bit of talking

1993
01:30:28,520 --> 01:30:32,599
Speaker 1: and then leaving. No, I don't argue about Instagram Instagram.

1994
01:30:32,680 --> 01:30:36,439
Speaker 1: It's Crimson Fig, just Crimson Fig. I believe there's an

1995
01:30:36,520 --> 01:30:39,479
Speaker 1: underscore in between the Crimson and the Fig. Or you

1996
01:30:39,560 --> 01:30:45,120
Speaker 1: can just put in black midwife. Yeah, cool, that's it.

1997
01:30:45,479 --> 01:30:45,760
Speaker 1: Thank you.

1998
01:30:46,080 --> 01:30:46,960
Speaker 2: I'm so happy you can.

1999
01:30:47,280 --> 01:30:50,040
Speaker 1: Thank you for having me, and thank you for you know,

2000
01:30:50,800 --> 01:30:52,920
Speaker 1: talking about all the things that are hard to talk

2001
01:30:52,960 --> 01:30:57,360
Speaker 1: about like surgical birth see sections and trauma and smoking

2002
01:30:57,400 --> 01:31:00,200
Speaker 1: weed and trying to breastfeed a baby and you know,

2003
01:31:00,280 --> 01:31:02,280
Speaker 1: all the things in between that we have to navigate

2004
01:31:02,360 --> 01:31:04,360
Speaker 1: in black bodies when birthing, Like we don't get to

2005
01:31:04,520 --> 01:31:06,679
Speaker 1: just go in the backyard and have an orgasmic birth.

2006
01:31:07,000 --> 01:31:07,200
Speaker 2: Yeah.

2007
01:31:07,680 --> 01:31:08,439
Speaker 1: There's levels to.

2008
01:31:08,479 --> 01:31:11,760
Speaker 2: This, there is, And really I just want all black

2009
01:31:11,840 --> 01:31:14,840
Speaker 2: women to at least know they have the option and know,

2010
01:31:15,320 --> 01:31:20,640
Speaker 2: like you know, you could do this too. Yeah, I

2011
01:31:20,680 --> 01:31:22,160
Speaker 2: think it's time to go. I don't know what's happening

2012
01:31:22,200 --> 01:31:24,960
Speaker 2: out there, but anyway, you guys know where to find us.

2013
01:31:25,040 --> 01:31:27,760
Speaker 2: But if you don't, it's good mom's bad choice, good

2014
01:31:27,800 --> 01:31:31,080
Speaker 2: Mom's Wow, good mom your score, Bad Choices. I'm not

2015
01:31:31,160 --> 01:31:33,000
Speaker 2: even tired. I don't know.

2016
01:31:35,600 --> 01:31:39,400
Speaker 3: Good Mom's underscore bad on Instagram and it's good Moms

2017
01:31:39,520 --> 01:31:40,920
Speaker 3: Bad Choices dot com.

2018
01:31:41,240 --> 01:31:45,920
Speaker 2: Yeah. Subscribe to our newsletter, buy some merch submit some

2019
01:31:46,040 --> 01:31:47,559
Speaker 2: advice questions, and some horries.

2020
01:31:47,600 --> 01:31:52,200
Speaker 3: If you have any some what horries, horror stories, stories,

2021
01:31:53,160 --> 01:31:56,600
Speaker 3: rash tales of highly horriorsh tale, that's maybe funny, or

2022
01:31:56,840 --> 01:31:57,200
Speaker 3: you mean.

2023
01:31:57,200 --> 01:31:58,479
Speaker 1: Like the time I went to that birth with no

2024
01:31:58,600 --> 01:32:00,400
Speaker 1: draws on because I got called in the middle or something.

2025
01:32:00,760 --> 01:32:11,200
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, it was very discreet squatting. Well they brought me.

2026
01:32:11,240 --> 01:32:13,320
Speaker 2: Thought, oh, she's very natural. She's a natural woman.

2027
01:32:14,640 --> 01:32:16,280
Speaker 1: Like you're so dressed up for our birth.

2028
01:32:16,360 --> 01:32:21,200
Speaker 2: And I was like this is my like read you

2029
01:32:21,320 --> 01:32:24,840
Speaker 2: interrupted me? Thank you?

2030
01:32:25,240 --> 01:32:25,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you guys.

2031
01:32:25,960 --> 01:32:28,960
Speaker 2: We'll catch you guys next week. Happy black breastrating away,

2032
01:32:29,080 --> 01:32:33,080
Speaker 2: happy black feeding. We we need more of chocolate milk. Yeah,

2033
01:32:35,160 --> 01:32:38,679
Speaker 2: one time a lot, I mean one time at Luna.

2034
01:32:39,520 --> 01:32:41,760
Speaker 2: What kind of milk is that? My mom has chocolate milk?

2035
01:32:43,600 --> 01:32:45,240
Speaker 1: Brilliant, The babies are brilliant.

2036
01:32:45,439 --> 01:32:51,000
Speaker 2: So I was like vanilla Russian, Russian, Russian Russian milk.

2037
01:32:52,560 --> 01:32:53,360
Speaker 2: It's a white Russian.

2038
01:32:53,479 --> 01:32:54,679
Speaker 1: I was like, a white Russian.

2039
01:32:56,680 --> 01:33:07,920
Speaker 2: All right, y'all, we'll catch you guys next week. Byett

2040
01:33:08,240 --> 01:33:08,599
Speaker 2: Toge