1 00:00:07,080 --> 00:00:10,680 Speaker 1: Welcome back everybody to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thanks 2 00:00:10,760 --> 00:00:13,440 Speaker 1: so much for joining us again. Kathy and I are 3 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:15,000 Speaker 1: always excited to be back. 4 00:00:15,440 --> 00:00:19,200 Speaker 2: We are so excited today our latest episode. You have 5 00:00:19,280 --> 00:00:21,680 Speaker 2: to check it out. We have been having so much 6 00:00:21,800 --> 00:00:26,880 Speaker 2: fun answering all your questions, chatting with Bachelor Nation favorites. 7 00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:28,120 Speaker 2: We're just having a blast. 8 00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:29,520 Speaker 3: How are you doing, Susan? 9 00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:33,520 Speaker 1: I'm doing great? How about you? Actually, it's like chili here. 10 00:00:33,760 --> 00:00:34,640 Speaker 1: I can't even believe it. 11 00:00:34,640 --> 00:00:36,080 Speaker 3: It's June, you know what. 12 00:00:36,320 --> 00:00:39,440 Speaker 2: This is why you don't chilly in the mid Atlantic 13 00:00:39,560 --> 00:00:42,559 Speaker 2: or the Northeast, because summer doesn't exist. 14 00:00:42,600 --> 00:00:44,440 Speaker 3: It just happens a day or two and that's it. 15 00:00:44,840 --> 00:00:49,760 Speaker 1: I'm really excited about today's guest though. Finally, right, finally, 16 00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:52,239 Speaker 1: we have two very special guests. One is with us 17 00:00:52,320 --> 00:00:54,120 Speaker 1: right now and we're waiting on the other one to 18 00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:59,360 Speaker 1: join us shortly. And it is let's welcome our Golden couple, 19 00:00:59,520 --> 00:01:03,280 Speaker 1: our dear friend Joan and Chuck will be here shortly. 20 00:01:04,240 --> 00:01:05,240 Speaker 3: Are you, Joan? 21 00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:10,240 Speaker 4: Can't believe we finally do this, this what like ten months? 22 00:01:10,240 --> 00:01:13,160 Speaker 3: I think I'm telling you. We have so much we 23 00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:15,000 Speaker 3: want to talk about with you. 24 00:01:15,560 --> 00:01:19,440 Speaker 2: But first of all, let's well, we're going to ask, 25 00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:21,520 Speaker 2: even though Chalk's not here, how you two doing tell 26 00:01:21,560 --> 00:01:23,119 Speaker 2: us the scoop because Chalk can't hear. 27 00:01:23,040 --> 00:01:29,320 Speaker 4: Us, He'll never hear what I'm saying. We are great. 28 00:01:29,720 --> 00:01:33,720 Speaker 4: We were just in New York City together on next week, 29 00:01:33,720 --> 00:01:35,319 Speaker 4: we're going to the beach for two weeks together with 30 00:01:35,400 --> 00:01:38,000 Speaker 4: my entire family, and then his kids are joining us 31 00:01:38,280 --> 00:01:41,440 Speaker 4: about halfway through the vacation. Things are great. It's just 32 00:01:41,959 --> 00:01:43,280 Speaker 4: kind of everything beach. 33 00:01:43,280 --> 00:01:43,920 Speaker 1: Do you go to? 34 00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:45,040 Speaker 4: What's out? 35 00:01:45,200 --> 00:01:47,080 Speaker 1: What beach do you go to? Where are you taking them? 36 00:01:47,319 --> 00:01:50,520 Speaker 4: Ocean Citney, Maryland. Yeah, it's only. 37 00:01:51,680 --> 00:01:54,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, So wait, are you guys still talking about moving 38 00:01:54,160 --> 00:01:56,160 Speaker 2: to New York or not or not moving? 39 00:01:56,240 --> 00:01:56,920 Speaker 3: But have you a place? 40 00:01:57,400 --> 00:01:59,880 Speaker 4: But yeah, In fact, we got re energized when we 41 00:01:59,880 --> 00:02:02,000 Speaker 4: were there. We were there last week with my mom 42 00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:05,120 Speaker 4: and my aunt who are in ninety three and eighty three. 43 00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:07,920 Speaker 3: Saw that Oh my god, oh my gosh. 44 00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:09,720 Speaker 4: We had a great time. But we both got like 45 00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:13,520 Speaker 4: really re energized. We kind of stopped looking a little 46 00:02:13,520 --> 00:02:16,200 Speaker 4: bit just because life got really busy and we didn't 47 00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:17,480 Speaker 4: really want to get a place up there that we 48 00:02:17,480 --> 00:02:19,560 Speaker 4: weren't going to spend much time in because you know, 49 00:02:19,600 --> 00:02:21,360 Speaker 4: obviously it's expensive and it's a bit of a trip 50 00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:22,799 Speaker 4: for him. It's easy for me, I can take a 51 00:02:22,840 --> 00:02:24,359 Speaker 4: train up there, but he has hop on a plane 52 00:02:24,560 --> 00:02:26,600 Speaker 4: to get there. And so we really wanted to make 53 00:02:26,639 --> 00:02:28,880 Speaker 4: sure we would like had the time to really spend 54 00:02:28,919 --> 00:02:32,440 Speaker 4: and you know, be there, and that seemed to not 55 00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:34,519 Speaker 4: really be happening. Like we came off the show, and 56 00:02:34,560 --> 00:02:36,040 Speaker 4: we thought we would have all this time like we 57 00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:38,720 Speaker 4: would come with the show, we would just go to 58 00:02:38,760 --> 00:02:40,760 Speaker 4: do we wouldn't anything else to do. And we were 59 00:02:40,840 --> 00:02:43,160 Speaker 4: so lucky. We got so many other opportunities. We've been 60 00:02:43,200 --> 00:02:46,639 Speaker 4: a lot of things with you guys obviously, so we 61 00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:49,839 Speaker 4: got really lucky. And but it did, first of all, 62 00:02:49,960 --> 00:02:51,520 Speaker 4: make it hard for us to even look for a 63 00:02:51,560 --> 00:02:54,000 Speaker 4: place because if you're not in New York City, when 64 00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:55,960 Speaker 4: you're looking for a place in New York City, you 65 00:02:55,960 --> 00:02:58,840 Speaker 4: miss out on them. They're available for a day or 66 00:02:58,840 --> 00:03:02,280 Speaker 4: two and then they're gone. And we just never were 67 00:03:02,320 --> 00:03:04,320 Speaker 4: able to invest like a chunk of time just to 68 00:03:04,360 --> 00:03:06,840 Speaker 4: go up and hang out and be there if things 69 00:03:06,880 --> 00:03:10,680 Speaker 4: became available. So we think after like the summer, things 70 00:03:10,680 --> 00:03:12,760 Speaker 4: will get easier and we'll when we'll have that time. 71 00:03:12,840 --> 00:03:15,720 Speaker 1: So yeah, but their hearts still there. You still want 72 00:03:15,720 --> 00:03:16,280 Speaker 1: to get a place. 73 00:03:16,680 --> 00:03:19,880 Speaker 4: In fact, even more after we now spend more time there, 74 00:03:19,919 --> 00:03:21,640 Speaker 4: we get more and more comfortable. 75 00:03:21,720 --> 00:03:21,880 Speaker 5: You know. 76 00:03:21,880 --> 00:03:24,680 Speaker 4: It's a little bit of an intimidating city, and now 77 00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:28,240 Speaker 4: both of us feel pretty comfortable there and we're less 78 00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:32,760 Speaker 4: focused on one particular area which we were in the beginning. 79 00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:34,800 Speaker 1: Open, yeah, and we're liking. 80 00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:36,920 Speaker 4: Other places a little more. We feel more comfortable in 81 00:03:36,920 --> 00:03:39,720 Speaker 4: other places, so it's going to be easier and we're 82 00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:41,560 Speaker 4: going to have more time, like in September ish. 83 00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:45,920 Speaker 2: Yeah, so wait, no, no, no, wait, it's September because 84 00:03:46,280 --> 00:03:47,960 Speaker 2: you are coming to visit me. 85 00:03:48,200 --> 00:03:48,680 Speaker 3: Finally. 86 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:52,320 Speaker 2: We've got that on the schedule too. Joe and Nancy 87 00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:55,400 Speaker 2: and Susan, we're all gonna we're going to descend on 88 00:03:55,520 --> 00:03:58,800 Speaker 2: Austin and we're going to I'm gonna, I'm Susan. 89 00:03:58,800 --> 00:04:00,160 Speaker 3: It's going to clock I. 90 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:04,600 Speaker 2: Once, but I'm serious. It's so excited you guys are coming. 91 00:04:04,680 --> 00:04:05,800 Speaker 2: It's gonna be so fun. 92 00:04:05,880 --> 00:04:08,640 Speaker 4: I so appreciate the invitation. I've never been to Austin. 93 00:04:08,680 --> 00:04:11,480 Speaker 4: Plus I would go to like Albert Quirkie year, I 94 00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:14,040 Speaker 4: would go to some Iowa or whatever with you guys, 95 00:04:14,080 --> 00:04:15,640 Speaker 4: just to be with you all because we have fun 96 00:04:15,640 --> 00:04:17,880 Speaker 4: wherever we go. But I excited about going. 97 00:04:18,120 --> 00:04:21,240 Speaker 1: You're gonna love. Have you been to Texas anyway? 98 00:04:21,760 --> 00:04:23,680 Speaker 4: My son played in a football game there, so I went. 99 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:27,200 Speaker 1: To because I lived in Dallas, right outside of Dallas 100 00:04:27,240 --> 00:04:30,760 Speaker 1: in Arlington for nine years. I know Texas. Never went 101 00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:33,880 Speaker 1: to Austin. When I went to Kathy's house, I was like, 102 00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:38,560 Speaker 1: this is Texas, Joan. It's like here, windy roads, trees, 103 00:04:38,839 --> 00:04:40,680 Speaker 1: a lake, like really it. 104 00:04:40,920 --> 00:04:42,400 Speaker 3: Well because I live in the hills. 105 00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:45,680 Speaker 4: Yeah, but he talks about Austin like it's a really 106 00:04:45,760 --> 00:04:49,479 Speaker 4: young community now and it's beautiful. It's like the place 107 00:04:49,520 --> 00:04:49,680 Speaker 4: to be. 108 00:04:50,880 --> 00:04:51,240 Speaker 3: It is. 109 00:04:51,320 --> 00:04:54,480 Speaker 2: And I have a good friend who has a fancy 110 00:04:54,520 --> 00:04:56,479 Speaker 2: boat that's gonna take us all out on the lake. 111 00:04:56,520 --> 00:04:58,640 Speaker 2: I'm going to show you millionaires row out of the 112 00:04:58,680 --> 00:04:59,680 Speaker 2: like we're gonna have a blast. 113 00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:02,200 Speaker 1: Gen will be looking for a place at Austin now. 114 00:05:03,760 --> 00:05:06,200 Speaker 4: I'm going to be looking for men for Kathy and Nancy. 115 00:05:06,880 --> 00:05:08,520 Speaker 1: Yes, that's right, you know. 116 00:05:09,720 --> 00:05:13,960 Speaker 3: Excuse me, you're making an assumption here, John, I am. 117 00:05:13,880 --> 00:05:16,440 Speaker 1: Do you have somebody you can't tell us? 118 00:05:18,240 --> 00:05:18,440 Speaker 5: Joan. 119 00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:20,880 Speaker 1: It's so weird because you look and you see all 120 00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:23,320 Speaker 1: the girls, you know, like from the show. You're like, 121 00:05:23,360 --> 00:05:29,000 Speaker 1: oh my god, oh my god, I saw April Tasha. 122 00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:33,520 Speaker 4: Like such a like a like a full circle kind 123 00:05:33,520 --> 00:05:37,039 Speaker 4: of you know, that got to now be part of 124 00:05:37,200 --> 00:05:38,840 Speaker 4: like another bachelor franchise. 125 00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:42,359 Speaker 1: I'm seeing your men from your show, like just looking 126 00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:45,760 Speaker 1: at it was really cool and might be like everybody there, Yeah, 127 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:46,320 Speaker 1: there are. 128 00:05:46,279 --> 00:05:49,000 Speaker 2: Some I'm just gonna say there might have been some 129 00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:51,360 Speaker 2: fun going on with some of those guys from your show. 130 00:05:53,240 --> 00:05:58,160 Speaker 2: My lips are sailed. I'm zipping it. I'm speaking of 131 00:05:58,279 --> 00:06:01,000 Speaker 2: speaking of relationships. You know, I'm going to ask you John, 132 00:06:01,480 --> 00:06:08,120 Speaker 2: any wedding updates on you guys. 133 00:06:05,640 --> 00:06:09,719 Speaker 4: Getting married this summer, so like I'm focusing on that, 134 00:06:10,040 --> 00:06:13,400 Speaker 4: and honestly, like you know, I just don't feel like 135 00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:15,679 Speaker 4: planning a wedding right now. We are in a good place. 136 00:06:15,680 --> 00:06:17,680 Speaker 4: We don't need to have like a wedding certificate to 137 00:06:17,720 --> 00:06:18,320 Speaker 4: say that we are in. 138 00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:19,400 Speaker 1: A good place right right. 139 00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:21,960 Speaker 4: And you know, there's also like a little part of 140 00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:26,760 Speaker 4: my brain that says, if we get married, then we 141 00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:28,839 Speaker 4: have to make more of an effort to live in 142 00:06:28,880 --> 00:06:31,240 Speaker 4: the same place, and we're not ready to do that yet. 143 00:06:31,279 --> 00:06:35,040 Speaker 4: He has a business that is like his attention and 144 00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:36,760 Speaker 4: or he can sell it, and like the end goal 145 00:06:36,839 --> 00:06:39,159 Speaker 4: is to sell it. But right now it needs his attention. 146 00:06:39,279 --> 00:06:42,160 Speaker 1: So you have time. You have plenty of time. 147 00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:44,200 Speaker 4: I don't have the biological clock. I'm not having any babies. 148 00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:47,240 Speaker 1: Yes, right, exactly. This is the best part. 149 00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:50,799 Speaker 4: Wedding. I mean, one day I'll have a wedding. 150 00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:54,440 Speaker 1: If when you do, you want it to be big 151 00:06:54,760 --> 00:06:56,160 Speaker 1: or an intimate small? 152 00:06:56,560 --> 00:06:58,799 Speaker 4: Yeah, I think intimate small. I've done a big wedding. 153 00:06:58,920 --> 00:07:01,440 Speaker 4: I've done my kid's big weddings. Like I have big 154 00:07:01,440 --> 00:07:03,719 Speaker 4: weddings in my life right now that like I could have, 155 00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:06,320 Speaker 4: you know, I could elope at this point, Yeah, I was. 156 00:07:06,320 --> 00:07:09,880 Speaker 2: Going to say at our age, I honestly, I'm not 157 00:07:09,920 --> 00:07:12,640 Speaker 2: even sure that wedding. 158 00:07:12,680 --> 00:07:14,240 Speaker 3: Is a is a thing. 159 00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:15,680 Speaker 1: You don't even have to know. 160 00:07:16,240 --> 00:07:18,360 Speaker 4: I really don't have to you know. 161 00:07:18,400 --> 00:07:20,119 Speaker 3: What can I tell you? Joan? 162 00:07:20,240 --> 00:07:22,000 Speaker 2: I want to tell you, and you need to be honest. 163 00:07:22,120 --> 00:07:26,560 Speaker 2: Now it's truth. No one's listening but us. Let's be honest. 164 00:07:26,840 --> 00:07:27,400 Speaker 4: That's not true. 165 00:07:27,680 --> 00:07:30,760 Speaker 2: Let's be honest. Why you don't have time to plan 166 00:07:30,840 --> 00:07:32,280 Speaker 2: a wedding? Do you want me to tell you why? 167 00:07:32,520 --> 00:07:34,120 Speaker 1: Because she's planning her son's too. 168 00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:35,240 Speaker 3: No, that's not it. 169 00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:42,280 Speaker 2: Joan knows because Joan spends every spare minute cooking recipes 170 00:07:42,760 --> 00:07:46,360 Speaker 2: and putting them on Instagram and TikTok, And I can 171 00:07:46,400 --> 00:07:49,320 Speaker 2: I just tell you if I cooked Joan, it was 172 00:07:49,520 --> 00:07:53,000 Speaker 2: just a big stretch. But if I did your recipes, like, 173 00:07:53,080 --> 00:07:55,080 Speaker 2: I want to bookmark them and save them because they 174 00:07:55,120 --> 00:07:58,440 Speaker 2: are they're easy, Like, they're not hard to make and 175 00:07:58,480 --> 00:07:59,520 Speaker 2: they look delicious. 176 00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:02,400 Speaker 4: Would you do hard stuff? I would. If I had 177 00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:03,920 Speaker 4: to cook hard stuff, I just wouldn't cook either. 178 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:07,800 Speaker 2: So right, So, so you like the compliment right about 179 00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:08,640 Speaker 2: all the cooking you do. 180 00:08:08,880 --> 00:08:10,080 Speaker 4: Thank you very much for sgrecting. 181 00:08:10,320 --> 00:08:12,280 Speaker 3: When you come in October, bring those. 182 00:08:13,800 --> 00:08:15,600 Speaker 1: Or you just have to give her a list of 183 00:08:15,640 --> 00:08:17,200 Speaker 1: the ingredients that we'll need. 184 00:08:17,520 --> 00:08:19,600 Speaker 2: Joe, when I talked, I'm gonna I am going to 185 00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:21,480 Speaker 2: do I just haven't had a chance yet. I am 186 00:08:21,520 --> 00:08:24,440 Speaker 2: going to be doing a spoof, something everyone can. 187 00:08:24,360 --> 00:08:24,800 Speaker 3: Look forward to. 188 00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:26,440 Speaker 4: I'm going to be so funny. 189 00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:28,480 Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm going to do a spoof. We have an 190 00:08:28,480 --> 00:08:28,920 Speaker 3: all planned. 191 00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:30,360 Speaker 2: I just haven't had the time to do it yet 192 00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:32,920 Speaker 2: because I've been taking care of grandchildren and sick friends. 193 00:08:33,240 --> 00:08:35,320 Speaker 1: And you and I'll get together and talk and decide 194 00:08:35,360 --> 00:08:36,280 Speaker 1: what it is we're making. 195 00:08:36,440 --> 00:08:38,000 Speaker 4: I know because you know what. I just I've been 196 00:08:38,160 --> 00:08:40,480 Speaker 4: watching the I've been watching Got to Get Out. Finally, 197 00:08:41,320 --> 00:08:45,320 Speaker 4: i've been watching you so funny. But I saw you 198 00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:49,040 Speaker 4: cooking chicken pecatta. I'm like, oh, I chicken pecana right now? 199 00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:51,040 Speaker 4: Can we make that? At least? Oh? 200 00:08:51,040 --> 00:08:53,760 Speaker 2: No? Susan said she'll cook one meal when you guys 201 00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:56,120 Speaker 2: are here, and I said, just send me the grocery 202 00:08:56,160 --> 00:08:58,079 Speaker 2: list because I can accept. 203 00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:01,240 Speaker 3: Like, what is that broccol you were just talking about, Susan? 204 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:03,240 Speaker 1: Broccoli rob Do you know what that is? 205 00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:03,640 Speaker 2: Joan? 206 00:09:04,120 --> 00:09:06,200 Speaker 4: I do, And I don't love broccoli robb. 207 00:09:06,120 --> 00:09:10,880 Speaker 1: Unless it's made perfectly. Yes, but I've never heard of it. 208 00:09:10,960 --> 00:09:13,080 Speaker 2: She just said she had broccoli robbed. I thought you 209 00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:16,520 Speaker 2: robbed what? I've never heard of it? 210 00:09:16,880 --> 00:09:18,280 Speaker 4: But you know how she's a criminal. 211 00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:20,559 Speaker 2: She had a veil and broccoli robbed for lunch, and 212 00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:21,679 Speaker 2: I had peanut butter crackers. 213 00:09:21,679 --> 00:09:33,080 Speaker 3: That's about right. So all right, so tell us we 214 00:09:33,160 --> 00:09:35,840 Speaker 3: want to know what. Tell us how you're different. 215 00:09:35,920 --> 00:09:40,280 Speaker 2: Seriously, you your experience is so different than than what 216 00:09:40,360 --> 00:09:44,319 Speaker 2: we've experienced. Right obvious on the show. You are the lead, 217 00:09:45,440 --> 00:09:47,480 Speaker 2: you know all of it. How are you different? 218 00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:50,559 Speaker 1: Tell us what's it like navigating after the show? 219 00:09:50,720 --> 00:09:53,400 Speaker 2: Yeah, how it's got to be different. Your life has 220 00:09:53,440 --> 00:09:55,240 Speaker 2: to be different and getting from A to B. 221 00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:57,720 Speaker 4: Yeah, So I think like the big of it, Well, 222 00:09:57,720 --> 00:09:59,400 Speaker 4: first of all, I was only on the other show 223 00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:02,040 Speaker 4: for three episod so I didn't get as rich of 224 00:10:02,040 --> 00:10:04,160 Speaker 4: an experience as you guys really did because you were 225 00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:09,480 Speaker 4: there both lasted pretty long, so like I almost started 226 00:10:09,559 --> 00:10:11,640 Speaker 4: a little on the Like it was a little newer 227 00:10:11,679 --> 00:10:14,840 Speaker 4: to me to be in that environment for a long time, 228 00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:17,480 Speaker 4: you know, And I mean one thing that we probably 229 00:10:17,480 --> 00:10:20,559 Speaker 4: all know as you are there. The longer you're there, 230 00:10:20,600 --> 00:10:24,040 Speaker 4: the more comfortable you get and the more animated you get, 231 00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:26,600 Speaker 4: and the more your personality comes out. And I think 232 00:10:26,679 --> 00:10:29,000 Speaker 4: that like that was probably the biggest change for me, 233 00:10:29,080 --> 00:10:31,280 Speaker 4: Like I've kind of got to be myself. After a 234 00:10:31,320 --> 00:10:33,840 Speaker 4: little while, I got like became very comfortable like with 235 00:10:33,880 --> 00:10:36,440 Speaker 4: all the cameras and with all the people and navigating it. 236 00:10:36,480 --> 00:10:38,839 Speaker 4: But I have to tell you, it's a whole lot 237 00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:43,079 Speaker 4: more work the hours you work. I remember thinking Gary 238 00:10:43,080 --> 00:10:45,360 Speaker 4: gets to go home at night and like hang out 239 00:10:45,360 --> 00:10:47,760 Speaker 4: in his hotel room and doesn't have cameras around him 240 00:10:47,760 --> 00:10:50,800 Speaker 4: when we're on. True you are working. You are working 241 00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:53,439 Speaker 4: the entire time. You're doing b roll all the time, 242 00:10:53,559 --> 00:10:56,439 Speaker 4: you're doing these things called pickups. We think I used 243 00:10:56,440 --> 00:10:59,360 Speaker 4: to think he was at his hotel in that interview 244 00:10:59,480 --> 00:11:02,640 Speaker 4: room all time. While everybody is doing their stuff in 245 00:11:02,679 --> 00:11:04,600 Speaker 4: the house. You're in that little interview room and nobody 246 00:11:04,600 --> 00:11:08,640 Speaker 4: knows you're there, so you are. It's work, it's more 247 00:11:09,360 --> 00:11:13,400 Speaker 4: and it's also emotionally more draining because you don't have 248 00:11:13,520 --> 00:11:15,760 Speaker 4: anybody to talk to. You don't have your family to 249 00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:18,240 Speaker 4: talk to, which obviously, when you're a contestant, you also 250 00:11:18,240 --> 00:11:19,920 Speaker 4: don't have your family to talk to you, but you 251 00:11:19,920 --> 00:11:22,480 Speaker 4: have each other, and you have other people around you, 252 00:11:22,679 --> 00:11:25,600 Speaker 4: maybe some camera person that you've become you know, friendly with, 253 00:11:25,880 --> 00:11:29,640 Speaker 4: or you have other producers. I had only my producer 254 00:11:29,720 --> 00:11:33,160 Speaker 4: and my handler, and there's. 255 00:11:32,400 --> 00:11:39,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, I would Carrie, Yeah, and Gina. 256 00:11:39,480 --> 00:11:43,440 Speaker 2: So listen Carrie and Gina, who for those of you 257 00:11:43,480 --> 00:11:46,800 Speaker 2: who don't know, Carrie is the stylist for and he 258 00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:48,160 Speaker 2: is a miracle man. 259 00:11:48,240 --> 00:11:52,640 Speaker 3: He's fabulous and yes, yeah's. 260 00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:56,440 Speaker 4: But even more than like great, how great he does 261 00:11:56,480 --> 00:11:59,720 Speaker 4: his job. He was like my psychiatrist. And that's what 262 00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:02,760 Speaker 4: I yes, because you know, he's like one of the 263 00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:04,880 Speaker 4: few people. So you know, we know we have producers 264 00:12:04,880 --> 00:12:06,439 Speaker 4: and producers they're making a show and we don't have 265 00:12:06,480 --> 00:12:08,599 Speaker 4: to acknowledge it. You know, this is it's like a 266 00:12:08,679 --> 00:12:10,679 Speaker 4: kind of a parallel thing. They're making a show while 267 00:12:10,679 --> 00:12:12,440 Speaker 4: you're trying to find love and you hope it all 268 00:12:12,520 --> 00:12:15,480 Speaker 4: ends up at the same time, right, But you do 269 00:12:15,640 --> 00:12:18,079 Speaker 4: have to know that the producers are producing you a 270 00:12:18,120 --> 00:12:19,840 Speaker 4: little bit. You know, they're not doing it in a 271 00:12:20,640 --> 00:12:21,920 Speaker 4: They're doing it in a way that they are trying 272 00:12:21,920 --> 00:12:24,839 Speaker 4: to make a good show as well as you, and 273 00:12:24,880 --> 00:12:26,680 Speaker 4: they do it very well, and they did it perfectly 274 00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:30,000 Speaker 4: for me. I can't complain about anything my season. I 275 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:33,320 Speaker 4: felt like they had my best interest in mind. But 276 00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:38,920 Speaker 4: like a unbiased person listen to how you're feeling. That 277 00:12:39,040 --> 00:12:40,199 Speaker 4: isn't trying to produce you. 278 00:12:41,200 --> 00:12:44,000 Speaker 1: It was not like calling us on the phone and saying, guys, 279 00:12:44,440 --> 00:12:46,560 Speaker 1: I'm feeling this, this and this. What do you think? 280 00:12:47,040 --> 00:12:48,640 Speaker 3: So yeah, but here's the thing, Joan. 281 00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:54,680 Speaker 2: You you were working full time prior to going to 282 00:12:54,720 --> 00:12:57,520 Speaker 2: being the Golden Bacherette, and then you did that and 283 00:12:57,600 --> 00:13:00,520 Speaker 2: now your life that's kind of what I was hat 284 00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:03,920 Speaker 2: is how different I mean, not only you engaged and 285 00:13:04,080 --> 00:13:07,240 Speaker 2: you know, found your guy, but your life and how 286 00:13:07,280 --> 00:13:09,440 Speaker 2: do you navigate that. I know you're planning your son's 287 00:13:09,480 --> 00:13:10,960 Speaker 2: wedding and you have children. 288 00:13:11,120 --> 00:13:15,120 Speaker 4: Like yeah, So so I came off the show and 289 00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:18,640 Speaker 4: I left Tahiti on a Friday, and I went to 290 00:13:18,640 --> 00:13:20,680 Speaker 4: work Monday morning, like I was ready to just go 291 00:13:20,760 --> 00:13:23,760 Speaker 4: back into my regular life. Yeah, I found out how 292 00:13:23,840 --> 00:13:25,760 Speaker 4: much press I needed to do. Normally you do about 293 00:13:25,760 --> 00:13:27,040 Speaker 4: two weeks of press. You do a week in New 294 00:13:27,120 --> 00:13:29,600 Speaker 4: York and a week in La. I had like five 295 00:13:29,640 --> 00:13:32,560 Speaker 4: weeks of press. So I went and told my boss, 296 00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:34,200 Speaker 4: like what my press schedule was going to be, and 297 00:13:34,240 --> 00:13:37,040 Speaker 4: he said, you can't work here anymore. He's like, you 298 00:13:37,679 --> 00:13:39,600 Speaker 4: have to be gone too much. We need somebody here 299 00:13:39,679 --> 00:13:41,920 Speaker 4: working and you're like doing your job, especially since I 300 00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:44,520 Speaker 4: worked at a school and it was fall was hitting 301 00:13:44,840 --> 00:13:47,200 Speaker 4: and it was September, and he's like, you know, like 302 00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:50,480 Speaker 4: I need you here. And so I lost my job. 303 00:13:51,120 --> 00:13:53,840 Speaker 4: So I kind of had to replace like all of 304 00:13:53,840 --> 00:13:56,240 Speaker 4: those hours that I spent doing a job because I 305 00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:58,160 Speaker 4: like to work. I don't want to be I'm not 306 00:13:58,240 --> 00:13:59,439 Speaker 4: like a person that's going to go play pick a 307 00:13:59,440 --> 00:14:00,559 Speaker 4: ball for eight hour or. 308 00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:01,800 Speaker 3: Do you still want to work. 309 00:14:02,520 --> 00:14:04,000 Speaker 1: I like, what still is working? 310 00:14:04,320 --> 00:14:04,520 Speaker 3: No? 311 00:14:04,520 --> 00:14:06,920 Speaker 2: No, no, I'm saying, but not you're not doing the full 312 00:14:06,960 --> 00:14:10,880 Speaker 2: time you know, nine to five job. No. 313 00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:14,320 Speaker 4: I think I'd like to do something different now, Like 314 00:14:14,320 --> 00:14:16,560 Speaker 4: we're sitting at a desk at a school, you know, 315 00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:20,320 Speaker 4: talking to alumni or whatever, or planning events. Was fun 316 00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:22,160 Speaker 4: at the time, but I feel like I've gotten a 317 00:14:22,200 --> 00:14:25,640 Speaker 4: taste of a different world now. Yeah, I am intrigued 318 00:14:25,680 --> 00:14:28,080 Speaker 4: by and you know, I would love it if something 319 00:14:28,600 --> 00:14:33,400 Speaker 4: unfolded in you know, this bachelor arena or maybe as 320 00:14:33,880 --> 00:14:36,160 Speaker 4: a podcast or something different, But you know. 321 00:14:36,120 --> 00:14:38,320 Speaker 3: I would you want to do it with chalk or 322 00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:39,000 Speaker 3: by yourself. 323 00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:43,360 Speaker 4: I would do it with chalk, certainly. But I do 324 00:14:43,560 --> 00:14:45,640 Speaker 4: like us to have kind of our separate things still 325 00:14:45,680 --> 00:14:48,600 Speaker 4: also to be honest, like, you know, one day we're 326 00:14:48,600 --> 00:14:50,400 Speaker 4: going to be spending twenty four day, seven days away 327 00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:53,040 Speaker 4: together and I still like having like my things, and 328 00:14:53,080 --> 00:14:54,680 Speaker 4: I like him having his things. 329 00:14:54,720 --> 00:14:56,840 Speaker 1: And you missed some when he's not there. Isn't that 330 00:14:57,040 --> 00:15:01,120 Speaker 1: a good thing you you get excited about. 331 00:15:01,360 --> 00:15:07,000 Speaker 3: I mean both of you have, and you don't. 332 00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:09,520 Speaker 2: You're not with your guys twenty four to seven, right, 333 00:15:10,040 --> 00:15:12,200 Speaker 2: And I mean, how do you feel about that. 334 00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:15,760 Speaker 3: I know Susan likes it. How do you feel, John, I. 335 00:15:15,680 --> 00:15:17,640 Speaker 4: Feel the same way as Susan. I don't think I 336 00:15:17,680 --> 00:15:20,520 Speaker 4: need to be with somebody twenty four hours. So let's 337 00:15:20,600 --> 00:15:22,680 Speaker 4: like say, when we're younger, you're raising kids. 338 00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:24,360 Speaker 1: You're starting out, it's a whole different world. 339 00:15:24,680 --> 00:15:26,480 Speaker 4: You want to have dinner with your family together, So 340 00:15:26,520 --> 00:15:29,960 Speaker 4: everybody needs to be together, right, a very different life. 341 00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:34,400 Speaker 4: You know that we're leading now, and it's surprisingly nice. 342 00:15:34,440 --> 00:15:36,680 Speaker 4: Like when I want to go and spend an evening 343 00:15:36,720 --> 00:15:40,120 Speaker 4: with my grandkids, or with my kids, or with some friends, 344 00:15:40,160 --> 00:15:43,200 Speaker 4: I don't feel guilty leaving my own home and going 345 00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:45,600 Speaker 4: with my kids or doing whatever, doing the things that 346 00:15:45,640 --> 00:15:48,040 Speaker 4: are making me happy. I don't feel like leaving them 347 00:15:48,080 --> 00:15:49,880 Speaker 4: home alone like I used to fill with my husband. 348 00:15:50,960 --> 00:15:54,000 Speaker 4: So this is nice, the freedom. We kind of get 349 00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:55,600 Speaker 4: the best of both worlds. You see each other, you're 350 00:15:55,640 --> 00:15:58,560 Speaker 4: really excited when you see each other, miss them, and 351 00:15:58,600 --> 00:16:00,880 Speaker 4: then when you go home, you have a freedom to 352 00:16:01,240 --> 00:16:02,640 Speaker 4: do what you want to do without guilt. 353 00:16:03,120 --> 00:16:03,560 Speaker 5: Yeah. 354 00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:05,720 Speaker 1: I agree. 355 00:16:06,160 --> 00:16:08,920 Speaker 3: So we're so glad Chock you're able to join us. 356 00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:13,640 Speaker 2: Let's move into our advice portion of the episode. We're 357 00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:16,000 Speaker 2: gonna kick things off of the question of the day, 358 00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:19,240 Speaker 2: and we'd love your thoughts, So go ahead, says give 359 00:16:19,320 --> 00:16:20,520 Speaker 2: us this question of the day. 360 00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:25,400 Speaker 1: Okay, what is something that you loved about being in 361 00:16:25,440 --> 00:16:31,200 Speaker 1: your golden error? What's something you think young people can 362 00:16:31,280 --> 00:16:34,040 Speaker 1: look forward to when it comes to aging. 363 00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:37,080 Speaker 5: Not letting the little stuff bother you. 364 00:16:37,240 --> 00:16:40,320 Speaker 6: Amen, You've had experience, you know, it's just so much 365 00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:42,760 Speaker 6: of its little stuff. You just gotta go with the 366 00:16:42,760 --> 00:16:44,080 Speaker 6: flow and just keep smiling. 367 00:16:44,320 --> 00:16:45,440 Speaker 1: That's right, that's right. 368 00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:48,680 Speaker 3: What about you, Joan? I love that, Jock. What about you, Johan? 369 00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:51,760 Speaker 4: I think feeling comfortable in your own skin, And that 370 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:54,720 Speaker 4: took me a really long time. It took me so 371 00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,200 Speaker 4: probably I was in my golden years, probably till I 372 00:16:57,240 --> 00:17:01,160 Speaker 4: was sixty to really feel just comfortable with who I am, 373 00:17:01,280 --> 00:17:02,960 Speaker 4: and you know where my life. 374 00:17:02,800 --> 00:17:05,200 Speaker 1: Is being okay with you? 375 00:17:05,320 --> 00:17:05,480 Speaker 6: Right? 376 00:17:06,560 --> 00:17:06,920 Speaker 3: I think? 377 00:17:07,040 --> 00:17:09,240 Speaker 2: Do you think young people don't feel that way? Is 378 00:17:09,240 --> 00:17:10,600 Speaker 2: that something they can look forward to? 379 00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:13,880 Speaker 4: I think so. I think it's hard. Like I think. 380 00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:17,320 Speaker 4: I think when you're younger, you you accept all the 381 00:17:17,400 --> 00:17:21,240 Speaker 4: judgment from people, and when you get older, you stopped 382 00:17:21,320 --> 00:17:23,840 Speaker 4: accepting what they think about you. You just have to 383 00:17:23,880 --> 00:17:25,960 Speaker 4: be good with yourself. So it was hard for me. 384 00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:28,920 Speaker 4: I don't know. Maybe you guys had more self confidence, or. 385 00:17:29,080 --> 00:17:31,399 Speaker 1: It wasn't a way later in life that I felt 386 00:17:31,400 --> 00:17:31,720 Speaker 1: that way. 387 00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:33,800 Speaker 4: You're right, Yeah, it took me a long time. 388 00:17:34,600 --> 00:17:36,320 Speaker 2: I would just add I agree with what both of 389 00:17:36,320 --> 00:17:38,840 Speaker 2: you said, But I also would say that as you 390 00:17:39,280 --> 00:17:44,040 Speaker 2: get into your golden years that you realize without sounding 391 00:17:44,119 --> 00:17:46,760 Speaker 2: you know, macabre, time is of the essence, like we 392 00:17:46,840 --> 00:17:49,320 Speaker 2: don't have You can't say I'll do that twenty years 393 00:17:49,320 --> 00:17:52,840 Speaker 2: from now. You know, we're looking at the clock saying 394 00:17:53,080 --> 00:17:56,720 Speaker 2: now's the time, so take you know, seize the moment. 395 00:17:56,720 --> 00:17:57,600 Speaker 3: I hate that expression. 396 00:17:57,640 --> 00:18:02,720 Speaker 1: Be right, it's true, that's true. Sweat the small stuff anymore. Yeah, 397 00:18:02,840 --> 00:18:04,240 Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like. 398 00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:05,960 Speaker 4: You have your health right now and you don't know 399 00:18:06,040 --> 00:18:08,159 Speaker 4: what's coming down the pike. You may live for a 400 00:18:08,160 --> 00:18:10,280 Speaker 4: bunch of years, but you may not be healthy enough 401 00:18:10,280 --> 00:18:13,879 Speaker 4: to do things so in the moment. 402 00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:16,399 Speaker 2: But I just think when kids, like we both we 403 00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:19,640 Speaker 2: all have young kids, you know, in their twenties and thirties, 404 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:22,840 Speaker 2: and our kids say things, oh, you know we'll do 405 00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:24,760 Speaker 2: it that. You know, we don't have time now, we'll 406 00:18:24,760 --> 00:18:27,520 Speaker 2: do it in the future. Where I think at our age, uh, huh, 407 00:18:27,560 --> 00:18:30,639 Speaker 2: we do it now because we don't know. There's nothing guaranteed. 408 00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:42,119 Speaker 1: Right now, we have one from our fans, Okay, we 409 00:18:42,359 --> 00:18:46,040 Speaker 1: like to share some advice with them. Whatever you think 410 00:18:46,280 --> 00:18:47,919 Speaker 1: you want to say, are you willing? 411 00:18:48,680 --> 00:18:49,280 Speaker 5: Let's do it? 412 00:18:49,440 --> 00:18:55,200 Speaker 1: Okay? Hi, Kathy Susan. My dad's wife passed away unexpectedly 413 00:18:55,359 --> 00:18:59,040 Speaker 1: about two months ago. They were married for thirteen years. 414 00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:04,600 Speaker 1: He is, as you can imagine, just broken. Kathy. I 415 00:19:04,640 --> 00:19:07,639 Speaker 1: know you have mentioned that you lost your husband. Do 416 00:19:07,720 --> 00:19:10,480 Speaker 1: you have any advice I can give to him to 417 00:19:10,680 --> 00:19:15,040 Speaker 1: help him get through this difficult time? When will it 418 00:19:15,080 --> 00:19:18,959 Speaker 1: get easier? And when did it get easier for you? Kathy? 419 00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:20,600 Speaker 5: Oh? 420 00:19:20,640 --> 00:19:23,640 Speaker 2: Okay, Well, first of all, I don't know who sent 421 00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:27,760 Speaker 2: this question in, But first and foremost, let me just 422 00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:33,040 Speaker 2: say I'm so sorry that your dad's wife passed away. 423 00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:37,080 Speaker 2: I'm sorry for him and I'm sorry for you. Unexpected 424 00:19:37,160 --> 00:19:42,639 Speaker 2: death is never easy, so I can imagine how broken 425 00:19:42,680 --> 00:19:47,040 Speaker 2: your dad is. I would say the biggest piece of 426 00:19:47,119 --> 00:19:52,679 Speaker 2: advice I could give to your dad is take time. 427 00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:57,679 Speaker 2: There's no timeline here. Grief will come and go in 428 00:19:57,800 --> 00:20:01,640 Speaker 2: his life. It'll rear its ugly head when you least 429 00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:05,919 Speaker 2: expect it. Don't listen to other people when they say, 430 00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:08,439 Speaker 2: you know it's been six months or two months or 431 00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:14,600 Speaker 2: a year, live day to day, get through each day. 432 00:20:14,640 --> 00:20:17,679 Speaker 2: That's enough. Let him have Tell him to have grace 433 00:20:18,119 --> 00:20:24,159 Speaker 2: for himself. Give him self grace because you it's going 434 00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:25,760 Speaker 2: to be a struggle for a while. I would like 435 00:20:25,840 --> 00:20:30,360 Speaker 2: to say it's easy, but it isn't. And so give 436 00:20:30,440 --> 00:20:34,959 Speaker 2: himself the gift of time and grace. And he doesn't 437 00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:38,680 Speaker 2: have to meet a timeline. When will it get easier? 438 00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:42,960 Speaker 2: It'll get easier. When it gets easier, they'll be They'll 439 00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:46,640 Speaker 2: be tough days, they'll be easier days. I remember when 440 00:20:46,640 --> 00:20:51,040 Speaker 2: my husband first died. I ask the therapist, my grief therapist, 441 00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:55,080 Speaker 2: will there ever be a day when I don't cry? 442 00:20:55,359 --> 00:20:59,120 Speaker 2: And she said yes, but not today. And so that's 443 00:20:59,240 --> 00:21:00,720 Speaker 2: you know, that's what I would say to your dad. 444 00:21:00,840 --> 00:21:05,679 Speaker 2: It gets easier over time. Never heals, uh, it just 445 00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:08,480 Speaker 2: you learn to live with the group grief and walk 446 00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:11,480 Speaker 2: through it and open your heart again to other opportunities. 447 00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:15,160 Speaker 2: I still miss him every day I think about him, 448 00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:19,640 Speaker 2: but I'm also grateful for my life and the opportunities. 449 00:21:19,680 --> 00:21:20,919 Speaker 3: And John, I want to throw. 450 00:21:20,760 --> 00:21:23,240 Speaker 2: It to you because it's just going to husband died, 451 00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:26,479 Speaker 2: So what what would you add to that? 452 00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:29,679 Speaker 4: Yeah, I think the smartest thing you said there was 453 00:21:29,920 --> 00:21:33,480 Speaker 4: give yourself grace. And I think that, like asking people 454 00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:37,520 Speaker 4: for advice, is actually kind of difficult because everybody does 455 00:21:37,520 --> 00:21:40,119 Speaker 4: it differently. Anybody I've never talked to you and I 456 00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:43,720 Speaker 4: have talked about it happy and anybody I've talked to like, 457 00:21:43,760 --> 00:21:45,320 Speaker 4: I say, how did you do it? What did you 458 00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:47,720 Speaker 4: do and or how did you feel? And we all 459 00:21:47,840 --> 00:21:51,199 Speaker 4: feel it differently. And so I would have, you know, 460 00:21:51,840 --> 00:21:53,760 Speaker 4: really really bad days where I just couldn't get out 461 00:21:53,760 --> 00:21:56,040 Speaker 4: of bed, and I would just be everybody's leave me alone. 462 00:21:56,080 --> 00:21:59,080 Speaker 4: I just need this day to feel the feels. And 463 00:21:59,119 --> 00:22:01,119 Speaker 4: then some I'd be like, I can't do all the 464 00:22:01,119 --> 00:22:04,080 Speaker 4: fields today. It's too hard, and I put it on 465 00:22:04,119 --> 00:22:07,840 Speaker 4: a back burner. But you have to give yourself grace 466 00:22:07,920 --> 00:22:10,680 Speaker 4: to feel the feels or to have a good day. 467 00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:13,160 Speaker 3: And there's no right or wrong. 468 00:22:13,560 --> 00:22:16,040 Speaker 4: There's no right or wrong, and that it's it's not 469 00:22:16,119 --> 00:22:17,919 Speaker 4: a quick journey. It's probably a journey that you're going 470 00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:20,439 Speaker 4: to have to go through your entire life. Have I 471 00:22:20,480 --> 00:22:22,919 Speaker 4: still have bad days sometimes Father's Day I went and 472 00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:25,520 Speaker 4: visited my late husband and my dad who died in 473 00:22:25,560 --> 00:22:28,680 Speaker 4: the same year like those both those grief feel differently, 474 00:22:28,720 --> 00:22:31,440 Speaker 4: but they still like take my breath away a little 475 00:22:31,440 --> 00:22:33,400 Speaker 4: bit when I feel about it, like when I think 476 00:22:33,400 --> 00:22:35,800 Speaker 4: about him. Sometimes sometimes I think about him and I 477 00:22:35,840 --> 00:22:39,159 Speaker 4: have total joy, like I had the greatest husband, I 478 00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:41,040 Speaker 4: had the greatest dad, and you know, the people I've 479 00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:43,040 Speaker 4: lost in my life, I feel lucky that they were 480 00:22:43,040 --> 00:22:45,239 Speaker 4: in my life. But sometimes I think, like, boy, this 481 00:22:45,280 --> 00:22:47,440 Speaker 4: really sucks not having him here. And I still have 482 00:22:47,640 --> 00:22:50,600 Speaker 4: that and it's been you know, a bunch of years. 483 00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:53,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, Kathy, you made a statement that time does not heal, 484 00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:58,920 Speaker 1: and I've always thought that time helps. I mean, more 485 00:22:58,960 --> 00:23:01,960 Speaker 1: time goes by than like Joan just said, you start 486 00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:06,239 Speaker 1: remembering the positive instead of dwelling on the sadness. And 487 00:23:06,280 --> 00:23:09,000 Speaker 1: I think that's what time would do for you. You 488 00:23:09,160 --> 00:23:10,320 Speaker 1: don't feel that way. 489 00:23:10,400 --> 00:23:11,600 Speaker 3: Oh, time. 490 00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:16,520 Speaker 2: I don't equate the passage of time with healing. I 491 00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:21,959 Speaker 2: equate time with with other with my heart, you know, 492 00:23:22,040 --> 00:23:26,399 Speaker 2: opening up new for new opportunities. But as Joan just said, 493 00:23:26,440 --> 00:23:30,800 Speaker 2: there are still days where you know, it's just really hard. 494 00:23:30,920 --> 00:23:31,760 Speaker 3: So I don't think. 495 00:23:31,960 --> 00:23:34,400 Speaker 2: I don't know Joan, you maybe you agree and Chalk 496 00:23:34,480 --> 00:23:38,840 Speaker 2: you also lost You lost Kathy, and so you know 497 00:23:39,080 --> 00:23:42,000 Speaker 2: what it's like too, and and what can you add 498 00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:44,040 Speaker 2: to this conversation, because it's tough. 499 00:23:44,400 --> 00:23:45,719 Speaker 5: You have pre and post. 500 00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:47,879 Speaker 6: The post is what we all talk about and what 501 00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:51,000 Speaker 6: we deal with, and it's as you as you have said, 502 00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:53,919 Speaker 6: it's just each individually. Like coming up on the one 503 00:23:54,000 --> 00:23:56,639 Speaker 6: year of my mother July third, I miss her every day. 504 00:23:56,960 --> 00:23:59,840 Speaker 6: But the pre I would tell you is we all 505 00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:02,200 Speaker 6: know that we're on this earth for a limited amount 506 00:24:02,240 --> 00:24:06,159 Speaker 6: of time. Enjoy the moment you have with loved ones absolutely, 507 00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:09,200 Speaker 6: whether they're healthy or not, they're directly in your life 508 00:24:09,320 --> 00:24:11,720 Speaker 6: or it's a phone call, Just spend that time and 509 00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:13,960 Speaker 6: enjoy it. Because when you lose somebody like that, you 510 00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:16,399 Speaker 6: look back and you go, we had some great times. 511 00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:18,040 Speaker 6: Should I have spend a little bit more time? You 512 00:24:18,119 --> 00:24:19,919 Speaker 6: never know which we deal with that individually. 513 00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:24,639 Speaker 2: Yeah, well, and I always it's never a contest. I mean, Joan, 514 00:24:24,720 --> 00:24:28,760 Speaker 2: you lost your husband to pancreatic cancer. Kathy died of 515 00:24:28,960 --> 00:24:30,800 Speaker 2: cancer as well, Chuck. 516 00:24:30,960 --> 00:24:33,120 Speaker 5: Yes, yeah, gille blastoma, that's. 517 00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:35,720 Speaker 3: Right, brain cancer. Yeah. And I lost my husband to suicide. 518 00:24:35,720 --> 00:24:39,879 Speaker 2: And I don't think there's ever a situation where you 519 00:24:39,920 --> 00:24:43,200 Speaker 2: know this one's better than that one. But I have 520 00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:47,119 Speaker 2: said this to Susan many times. Susan's divorced, and the 521 00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:52,320 Speaker 2: only advantage, if that's even the correct word to a divorce, 522 00:24:52,920 --> 00:24:56,320 Speaker 2: is Susan and her ex husband can talk. They can 523 00:24:56,600 --> 00:24:59,959 Speaker 2: say remember the time when, or I'm really sorry this happened, 524 00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:04,080 Speaker 2: because while they're divorced, they still are in each other's lives. 525 00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:07,280 Speaker 1: But I lost siblings and that was their way way 526 00:25:07,320 --> 00:25:10,520 Speaker 1: younger than me. And you just think about why did 527 00:25:10,560 --> 00:25:13,359 Speaker 1: they take him before me? You know those questions. But 528 00:25:13,920 --> 00:25:18,000 Speaker 1: the pain is always there. But I try to think 529 00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:20,360 Speaker 1: of all the things that made me laugh about them. 530 00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:22,919 Speaker 1: That happens in time. 531 00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:28,000 Speaker 4: Yea, So the time does change things. So yes, you're 532 00:25:28,160 --> 00:25:30,800 Speaker 4: you're the person that wrote this message. Like I want 533 00:25:30,840 --> 00:25:34,119 Speaker 4: them to have hope from this conversation, and there really 534 00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:38,280 Speaker 4: is hope. The same does make it different. It doesn't 535 00:25:38,280 --> 00:25:39,800 Speaker 4: take your breath away when you feel it when you 536 00:25:39,840 --> 00:25:44,600 Speaker 4: think about your loved one after some time, as emotional 537 00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:47,240 Speaker 4: when you see a picture of them after some time. 538 00:25:47,520 --> 00:25:51,080 Speaker 4: But it does take time. But there it's only two months, 539 00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:54,280 Speaker 4: quite at the end of this tunnel. But like, just 540 00:25:54,280 --> 00:25:55,360 Speaker 4: give him grace and just be. 541 00:25:57,080 --> 00:25:58,120 Speaker 3: Yeah, just you know what. 542 00:25:58,359 --> 00:26:00,919 Speaker 2: I also I don't know if you guys agree, but 543 00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:04,600 Speaker 2: I would also say be a good listener, because he's 544 00:26:04,640 --> 00:26:09,040 Speaker 2: going to want to talk about or at least I did, 545 00:26:09,480 --> 00:26:12,639 Speaker 2: some of the good times. Sometimes reliving those times with 546 00:26:12,760 --> 00:26:15,959 Speaker 2: your loved one that's gone, I don't know, makes them 547 00:26:16,000 --> 00:26:18,760 Speaker 2: feel closer. And my kids and I would get together 548 00:26:18,840 --> 00:26:21,200 Speaker 2: and they would tell funny stories about their dad, and 549 00:26:21,720 --> 00:26:23,560 Speaker 2: you know, it makes me cry just thinking about them, 550 00:26:23,600 --> 00:26:27,760 Speaker 2: because those those are the memories that you keep in 551 00:26:27,800 --> 00:26:30,600 Speaker 2: your heart and you always have with you. So it 552 00:26:30,640 --> 00:26:33,600 Speaker 2: will get easier for your dad. It's just going to 553 00:26:33,680 --> 00:26:37,000 Speaker 2: take time. It's just going to take some time. It's 554 00:26:37,040 --> 00:26:38,080 Speaker 2: just going to take time. 555 00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:41,200 Speaker 1: And just be there for him. If he wants to cry, 556 00:26:41,200 --> 00:26:44,520 Speaker 1: and let him cry, you know. And if he wants 557 00:26:44,560 --> 00:26:47,520 Speaker 1: to celebrate life, then do that as well, but just 558 00:26:47,520 --> 00:26:51,200 Speaker 1: give him time. Like they said, But thank you for Well, we. 559 00:26:51,200 --> 00:26:52,600 Speaker 3: Can't end on these sad notes. 560 00:26:55,720 --> 00:26:57,720 Speaker 1: You have What do you looking forward to? 561 00:26:57,920 --> 00:26:58,120 Speaker 4: Yeah? 562 00:26:58,160 --> 00:26:59,800 Speaker 3: What do you guys have going for this year? The 563 00:27:00,200 --> 00:27:01,560 Speaker 3: thing that's going to happen for you too? 564 00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:05,119 Speaker 6: Well, we're both doing we're doing some independent trips. And 565 00:27:05,280 --> 00:27:07,480 Speaker 6: there's there's an old saying that you should do a 566 00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:10,199 Speaker 6: big trip together, the big trip with the family, and 567 00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:11,720 Speaker 6: then independent trips. 568 00:27:12,640 --> 00:27:14,399 Speaker 5: Joan, you want to tell everybody what you're doing. 569 00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:18,440 Speaker 4: So I am going on a cruise at ten days 570 00:27:18,480 --> 00:27:22,919 Speaker 4: cruise medi Training Cruise Europe with Nancy from the Goldens. 571 00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:26,840 Speaker 4: Yesday talk was unavailable. He already had made a vacation 572 00:27:26,920 --> 00:27:31,520 Speaker 4: plan with his son. So I had this opportunity. I said, 573 00:27:31,520 --> 00:27:34,440 Speaker 4: bring somebody. So I thought, boy, I'd love to be 574 00:27:34,520 --> 00:27:36,399 Speaker 4: able to spend like, do this trip with Nancy. So 575 00:27:36,440 --> 00:27:37,280 Speaker 4: we're doing this together. 576 00:27:38,040 --> 00:27:40,160 Speaker 1: Don't you wish it was all the same one, both 577 00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:41,560 Speaker 1: of us. Yeah, I. 578 00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:45,480 Speaker 4: I I saw the cruise line that you guys are going. 579 00:27:45,720 --> 00:27:45,920 Speaker 6: Yeah. 580 00:27:46,400 --> 00:27:47,960 Speaker 4: The other day for I was, oh, I. 581 00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:49,959 Speaker 3: Know, I would have been fine the four of us 582 00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:53,960 Speaker 3: on a ship. That would be what about what about 583 00:27:53,960 --> 00:27:55,000 Speaker 3: you chalk? What do you do? 584 00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:58,520 Speaker 6: So my son and I when he graduated, Uh, I 585 00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:00,320 Speaker 6: promise to see hm a trip anywhere you want to go. 586 00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:04,160 Speaker 6: So we're going to go do Africa. So we're doing 587 00:28:04,200 --> 00:28:06,479 Speaker 6: that almost the exact same mirror in the time that 588 00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:09,159 Speaker 6: Jon's going to be gone. So we're going to be 589 00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:11,520 Speaker 6: going and then he uh, when we're done with that, 590 00:28:11,600 --> 00:28:13,480 Speaker 6: he's going to take another ten days and go to 591 00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:14,480 Speaker 6: Asia with my brother. 592 00:28:14,920 --> 00:28:20,080 Speaker 5: Oh wow, your son and my daughter. They've got great lives. 593 00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:24,040 Speaker 1: So they they both love they're both lovely people too. 594 00:28:24,119 --> 00:28:27,200 Speaker 2: Yeah, they're so Wait and then the big trip together. 595 00:28:27,240 --> 00:28:28,600 Speaker 2: You guys are going to Ocean City. 596 00:28:28,800 --> 00:28:32,040 Speaker 1: Joan was said, that's the family trip that's coming up 597 00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:35,280 Speaker 1: and we together, we just got we just have one 598 00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:36,359 Speaker 1: or two people showing up. 599 00:28:36,400 --> 00:28:37,000 Speaker 5: It's amazing. 600 00:28:39,080 --> 00:28:40,720 Speaker 3: Is that the big trip though that you guys have 601 00:28:40,800 --> 00:28:42,000 Speaker 3: this year? Do you have another trip? 602 00:28:42,920 --> 00:28:44,960 Speaker 4: We just kind of played by year. That's our that's 603 00:28:45,000 --> 00:28:45,760 Speaker 4: really not our bag trip. 604 00:28:45,800 --> 00:28:47,760 Speaker 1: I mean, we've had a family trip that's. 605 00:28:47,600 --> 00:28:51,160 Speaker 4: A family trip. So we did Caribbean kind of trips. 606 00:28:51,200 --> 00:28:54,440 Speaker 4: We did in Mexico and we did a Punchakana Dominican 607 00:28:54,440 --> 00:28:58,200 Speaker 4: Republic already this year. So but we don't have like 608 00:28:58,520 --> 00:29:00,280 Speaker 4: we might be to your up. 609 00:29:00,600 --> 00:29:02,680 Speaker 6: Well, honey, we do. We do have a big trip. Yeah, 610 00:29:02,680 --> 00:29:05,640 Speaker 6: we potentially have Europe. But we have a very very 611 00:29:05,640 --> 00:29:06,680 Speaker 6: big trip coming up. 612 00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:12,760 Speaker 4: You remember this, Oh we're going to Disney World. You know, 613 00:29:12,800 --> 00:29:14,880 Speaker 4: we got to always give us a couple of trip 614 00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:16,960 Speaker 4: and they, you know, I thought maybe they would send 615 00:29:17,040 --> 00:29:19,720 Speaker 4: us back to like Tahiti and bor like Cuomo. 616 00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:21,600 Speaker 3: How about like Cuomo, I don't know. 617 00:29:21,600 --> 00:29:24,000 Speaker 2: Wait, let's think about this Lake Cuomo or breakfast when 618 00:29:24,080 --> 00:29:24,840 Speaker 2: Mickey mask you. 619 00:29:27,040 --> 00:29:29,920 Speaker 4: We're taking all of our like all of my kids, 620 00:29:29,960 --> 00:29:32,560 Speaker 4: my grandkids, his kids, all to Disney World. 621 00:29:32,880 --> 00:29:34,240 Speaker 1: Oh, that's gonna be great. 622 00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:37,320 Speaker 2: Wait wait are they closing the park for you guys? 623 00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:44,800 Speaker 1: Yeah? Oh, fun and something that they'll remember. 624 00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:47,080 Speaker 6: It's a great trip. We're going to be on for 625 00:29:47,080 --> 00:29:48,800 Speaker 6: five days and it's going to be perfect. 626 00:29:49,040 --> 00:29:51,320 Speaker 4: Yes, honestly, I am so grateful that we got that 627 00:29:51,320 --> 00:29:53,560 Speaker 4: trip because I love to be able to I always 628 00:29:53,600 --> 00:29:55,600 Speaker 4: wanted to do like Disney World. It's like one of 629 00:29:55,640 --> 00:29:57,440 Speaker 4: those things I've had planned in my mind that you 630 00:29:57,440 --> 00:29:59,280 Speaker 4: take your kids to Disney World. It's just something you do. 631 00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:02,080 Speaker 4: And so you know, we get to do this together 632 00:30:02,240 --> 00:30:03,040 Speaker 4: with you know what. 633 00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:06,240 Speaker 2: It may not be the glamorous, uh you know, romantic 634 00:30:06,240 --> 00:30:08,360 Speaker 2: trip to Italy or the South of France, but your 635 00:30:08,440 --> 00:30:12,280 Speaker 2: family will never forget it. And you know, Bachelor is 636 00:30:12,280 --> 00:30:15,680 Speaker 2: all about love and and and that Golden Bachelor is 637 00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:17,760 Speaker 2: all about family and love. So you know what, it's 638 00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:20,600 Speaker 2: gonna be a great trip and Disney it's gonna be great. 639 00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:25,440 Speaker 1: It's gonna be it wasn't that kiss for me? Wasn't 640 00:30:25,480 --> 00:30:27,240 Speaker 1: that the first thing? Yes? 641 00:30:27,280 --> 00:30:27,640 Speaker 2: It was. 642 00:30:29,200 --> 00:30:31,880 Speaker 3: It was I remember the little princess. 643 00:30:32,080 --> 00:30:33,480 Speaker 4: Good guys to Disneyland. 644 00:30:35,080 --> 00:30:37,520 Speaker 3: But are you going to disney World or disney World 645 00:30:38,120 --> 00:30:38,600 Speaker 3: the World? 646 00:30:39,040 --> 00:30:44,200 Speaker 4: Yeah, and it's closer for this' so much. 647 00:30:44,280 --> 00:30:46,560 Speaker 3: Okay, I wish I could. Could I join? That would 648 00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:47,520 Speaker 3: just make it thirty six. 649 00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:55,960 Speaker 1: No, thank you. I've taken my children multiple times. Oh 650 00:30:56,000 --> 00:30:58,880 Speaker 1: that when they were going, and now it's time to 651 00:30:59,160 --> 00:31:00,280 Speaker 1: take my grand is. 652 00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:00,840 Speaker 5: Wait. 653 00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:01,959 Speaker 3: I just have to admit. 654 00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:06,200 Speaker 2: I have to admit when my kids loved his world, 655 00:31:06,280 --> 00:31:08,400 Speaker 2: we did the thing you know that they show where 656 00:31:08,400 --> 00:31:11,240 Speaker 2: you at Christmas surprise the kids with the tickets and. 657 00:31:11,120 --> 00:31:12,400 Speaker 3: My kids went bananas. 658 00:31:12,760 --> 00:31:15,080 Speaker 2: And we did that once as a family. And then 659 00:31:15,120 --> 00:31:17,000 Speaker 2: when I had my daughter and she got old enough, 660 00:31:17,160 --> 00:31:18,960 Speaker 2: my husband wanted to take them back and I looked 661 00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:21,760 Speaker 2: a him. I said, you know what, mommy needs a vacation. 662 00:31:22,320 --> 00:31:28,440 Speaker 2: And he took all three kids by himself. What Yeah, 663 00:31:28,520 --> 00:31:30,640 Speaker 2: he I told you I was married to a great 664 00:31:30,680 --> 00:31:32,240 Speaker 2: guy and he had a blast. 665 00:31:32,480 --> 00:31:34,560 Speaker 3: He had a blast. He loved it. I was like, 666 00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:35,600 Speaker 3: so did I. 667 00:31:35,600 --> 00:31:39,720 Speaker 2: I you know, had a bottle of wine and uh 668 00:31:39,760 --> 00:31:41,600 Speaker 2: and a massage hilarious. 669 00:31:41,680 --> 00:31:44,600 Speaker 4: I can't imagine a father there with three kids and 670 00:31:44,640 --> 00:31:45,520 Speaker 4: being able to handle that. 671 00:31:45,840 --> 00:31:50,240 Speaker 1: Yep, he was great. You so much for joining us today. 672 00:31:50,480 --> 00:31:52,840 Speaker 2: We all have to get together again. We all need 673 00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:56,360 Speaker 2: to get together in some city. The guys Joan from 674 00:31:56,400 --> 00:31:58,520 Speaker 2: your season and some of us can get together and 675 00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:00,840 Speaker 2: have dinner. That would be so fun fun, wouldn't it. 676 00:32:00,920 --> 00:32:01,520 Speaker 1: Definitely? 677 00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:03,880 Speaker 4: Yeah, we need to plan that. That sounds like a 678 00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:05,520 Speaker 4: really hard thing to plan, but maybe we could just 679 00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:07,160 Speaker 4: set it up and just see if you want to come. 680 00:32:07,200 --> 00:32:07,400 Speaker 5: Come. 681 00:32:07,600 --> 00:32:10,720 Speaker 1: Well, actually, we're still to planned Girls Week next year. 682 00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:11,360 Speaker 3: Wait. 683 00:32:11,520 --> 00:32:15,680 Speaker 2: I know someone actually who used to do event planning 684 00:32:16,240 --> 00:32:18,640 Speaker 2: until she became a star of a TV show. 685 00:32:19,240 --> 00:32:24,200 Speaker 3: That would be you Jones. So I just volunteered. 686 00:32:24,240 --> 00:32:27,880 Speaker 6: You get planning and then I'll let you ladies know too, 687 00:32:27,960 --> 00:32:33,200 Speaker 6: because we're we're in the midst of putting together a Golden. 688 00:32:32,880 --> 00:32:36,280 Speaker 5: Bachelor at a guide trip to work. 689 00:32:36,480 --> 00:32:39,560 Speaker 6: We're going to crash and we got to think nineteen 690 00:32:39,600 --> 00:32:41,440 Speaker 6: to twenty guys that have committed to do it. We 691 00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:43,440 Speaker 6: can't give you any details because we're still working on that. 692 00:32:43,480 --> 00:32:46,760 Speaker 6: We'll know more on Wednesday. Also on our dates that 693 00:32:46,920 --> 00:32:47,920 Speaker 6: is right around the corner. 694 00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:58,040 Speaker 2: You're invited Jones bringing us the star girls. All right, well, listen, 695 00:32:58,280 --> 00:33:00,640 Speaker 2: we love getting to chat with you guys. Thanks for 696 00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:03,840 Speaker 2: joining us. Be sure to follow Bachelor Happy Hour. We 697 00:33:03,920 --> 00:33:06,280 Speaker 2: have new episodes coming out. If you like this one 698 00:33:06,320 --> 00:33:09,280 Speaker 2: with Joan and Chalk, We're going to do it again sometimes. 699 00:33:09,320 --> 00:33:12,479 Speaker 1: Make sure you keep submitting your questions to us, because 700 00:33:12,520 --> 00:33:15,560 Speaker 1: without you, there wouldn't be us. And I'm so happy 701 00:33:15,600 --> 00:33:17,880 Speaker 1: that you join us every week and you remember what 702 00:33:18,000 --> 00:33:21,920 Speaker 1: to do. Go to bachelornation dot com slash Golden Hour, 703 00:33:22,160 --> 00:33:25,680 Speaker 1: or you can dm us on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour. 704 00:33:26,520 --> 00:33:27,360 Speaker 5: Thank you, ladies. 705 00:33:27,640 --> 00:33:31,480 Speaker 2: Listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour on the iHeartRadio 706 00:33:31,520 --> 00:33:33,600 Speaker 2: app or wherever you listen to podcasts. 707 00:33:33,680 --> 00:33:35,480 Speaker 3: Until next time, have a great week. 708 00:33:35,640 --> 00:33:41,440 Speaker 1: See you say we love you.