1 00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:12,239 Speaker 1: Mm from grandmothers who whispered in their baby girl in 2 00:00:13,400 --> 00:00:16,920 Speaker 1: two fathers on dimly lit street corners, instructing young soldiers 3 00:00:16,920 --> 00:00:20,959 Speaker 1: to always keep their eyes open. You be queen, you 4 00:00:21,040 --> 00:00:24,279 Speaker 1: were fired. You will pass through centuries on the hands 5 00:00:24,320 --> 00:00:28,720 Speaker 1: of your daughters. They called you wisdom. Proverbs on the 6 00:00:28,800 --> 00:00:32,320 Speaker 1: backs of diamond eyed school children who growing into hymnals 7 00:00:32,360 --> 00:00:37,200 Speaker 1: recited by amethyst holding urban philosophers who recited neighborhood commandments 8 00:00:37,240 --> 00:00:40,680 Speaker 1: out of the windows of restored Alchemedo chariots to keep 9 00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:46,080 Speaker 1: the warmth of their blood. Be wise, be smart, being black, 10 00:00:46,120 --> 00:00:52,320 Speaker 1: Opal Brown courts, bloodstone and prayer. Be every form of jim. 11 00:00:52,320 --> 00:00:57,080 Speaker 1: See king, told, scribe, scribe, told son, son, told wife, 12 00:00:57,480 --> 00:01:00,360 Speaker 1: wife told her daughter, and daughter told the ass is. 13 00:01:00,640 --> 00:01:04,120 Speaker 1: And the ancestors told me that you would come to 14 00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:09,520 Speaker 1: give wisdom thousands. They said you would come dropping dropping 15 00:01:09,560 --> 00:01:13,160 Speaker 1: the jim that got it. Hey, Welcome to another episode 16 00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:17,040 Speaker 1: of The Dropping Gym's podcast. I am your host, Debbie Brown, 17 00:01:17,600 --> 00:01:20,880 Speaker 1: and this is a show where we explore higher consciousness 18 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:24,720 Speaker 1: for real life. So wherever you happen to find yourself 19 00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:29,160 Speaker 1: on the path, whether you're just beginning your beautiful spiritual journey, 20 00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:33,039 Speaker 1: whether you are deepening, whether you are an integration and 21 00:01:33,080 --> 00:01:37,839 Speaker 1: embodiment or whether you are in your beautiful mastery. Um. 22 00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:42,200 Speaker 1: This show has something for everyone and is filled with 23 00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:49,120 Speaker 1: opportunities to observe and explore ourselves with tenderness, with joy, 24 00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:53,520 Speaker 1: uh and with urgency. So today's show, we are really 25 00:01:53,520 --> 00:01:57,280 Speaker 1: going to be leaning into some of the house if 26 00:01:57,280 --> 00:01:59,480 Speaker 1: you happen to be catching the show. In May, it's 27 00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:03,400 Speaker 1: Mental Health Month and a lot of expansive conversations are 28 00:02:03,400 --> 00:02:07,800 Speaker 1: happening around mental health that has become gratefully a big 29 00:02:07,840 --> 00:02:11,040 Speaker 1: center piece of the ways in which we are looking 30 00:02:11,040 --> 00:02:13,880 Speaker 1: at ourselves and looking at society right now. And when 31 00:02:13,919 --> 00:02:17,320 Speaker 1: we think of mental health, I think sometimes it's considered 32 00:02:17,360 --> 00:02:21,520 Speaker 1: that it exists in a completely different category than our 33 00:02:21,680 --> 00:02:24,840 Speaker 1: spiritual well being. But the way that I see things 34 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:28,320 Speaker 1: is always through a holistic lens and holistic approach, and 35 00:02:28,360 --> 00:02:31,600 Speaker 1: it's really about the integration of all of the things 36 00:02:31,680 --> 00:02:35,000 Speaker 1: for our highest good. So what are all the pillars 37 00:02:35,040 --> 00:02:38,480 Speaker 1: that we we can lean into as we remember our wholeness? 38 00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:41,480 Speaker 1: So when I think of mental health, I think of 39 00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:46,520 Speaker 1: it as encompassing our spiritual journey, our journey potentially in 40 00:02:46,840 --> 00:02:52,200 Speaker 1: therapy or with psychologists um our experiences with how we're 41 00:02:52,200 --> 00:02:55,799 Speaker 1: treating ourselves and our bodies and our ability to kind 42 00:02:55,800 --> 00:02:59,040 Speaker 1: of stand in our self awareness and to be with ourselves, 43 00:02:59,080 --> 00:03:01,800 Speaker 1: and some then I speak to on this show, but 44 00:03:01,919 --> 00:03:06,400 Speaker 1: I definitely am in conversation so often with many different friends, 45 00:03:06,880 --> 00:03:10,560 Speaker 1: especially in this wellness space, is around how there is 46 00:03:10,600 --> 00:03:15,280 Speaker 1: such a false narrative and belief in what wellness is 47 00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:18,240 Speaker 1: supposed to look like, that it is this you know, 48 00:03:18,360 --> 00:03:21,280 Speaker 1: destination you've arrived at and all of a sudden everything 49 00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:24,840 Speaker 1: is all good. But I think most teachers UM that 50 00:03:24,919 --> 00:03:27,720 Speaker 1: stand in their authenticity will be the first to tell you, 51 00:03:27,760 --> 00:03:34,600 Speaker 1: including myself, that it's less about being in positivity and 52 00:03:34,800 --> 00:03:42,240 Speaker 1: less about this perfection as it is about an acceptance 53 00:03:42,360 --> 00:03:46,120 Speaker 1: and an allowance of the natural ebbs and flows of 54 00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:53,240 Speaker 1: life and the natural weaving of our spiritual curriculum and 55 00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:56,120 Speaker 1: the lens of perception that we choose in each moment 56 00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:58,880 Speaker 1: to view it with, and how we allow it to 57 00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:03,440 Speaker 1: relate to our sense of self and our sense of worth. 58 00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:08,760 Speaker 1: So on today's show, I really want to kind of 59 00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:14,560 Speaker 1: sit inside the pieces about our self awareness and using 60 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:19,120 Speaker 1: it as a tool of resistance, using our wholeness as 61 00:04:19,160 --> 00:04:23,560 Speaker 1: a tool of resistance in the world, and really using 62 00:04:23,720 --> 00:04:27,920 Speaker 1: our ability to check in with our bodies and our 63 00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:32,360 Speaker 1: ability to question our feelings and kind of stay steeped 64 00:04:32,920 --> 00:04:37,280 Speaker 1: and a joyful curiosity of self study as the way 65 00:04:37,279 --> 00:04:41,159 Speaker 1: in which we can begin to experience ourselves um for 66 00:04:41,320 --> 00:04:47,360 Speaker 1: long term lasting effects of peace, ease, and grace in 67 00:04:47,560 --> 00:04:54,400 Speaker 1: this uh constantly winding journey that we call life on 68 00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:58,400 Speaker 1: earth as human beings, as our beautiful spiritual souls exist 69 00:04:59,040 --> 00:05:03,320 Speaker 1: in this human technology, our bodies, and how to make 70 00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:07,760 Speaker 1: this experience of being alive on earth for our highest 71 00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:13,039 Speaker 1: good and for maximum connection to the divine and to 72 00:05:13,120 --> 00:05:16,200 Speaker 1: our ascension. So today's show is going to be kind 73 00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:18,280 Speaker 1: of stepping into all those things that I have a 74 00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:21,800 Speaker 1: really special guest, And what I really love about this guest, 75 00:05:21,839 --> 00:05:24,200 Speaker 1: who I'm gonna kind of deepen in my explanation of 76 00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:26,800 Speaker 1: in just a moment. What I really love about this 77 00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:31,039 Speaker 1: guest is not only is he deeply um within his 78 00:05:31,080 --> 00:05:35,120 Speaker 1: spiritual process and practice. He's a masterful teacher of his 79 00:05:35,200 --> 00:05:40,800 Speaker 1: work and of Buddhist teachings, but he's also a man 80 00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:45,200 Speaker 1: who is committed to feeling all the fields, which is 81 00:05:45,279 --> 00:05:50,760 Speaker 1: so radical in and of itself, especially um in society 82 00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:53,839 Speaker 1: up until this point, Uh, and especially in this country, 83 00:05:53,839 --> 00:05:56,360 Speaker 1: and especially when it comes to men of color. So 84 00:05:56,480 --> 00:06:01,400 Speaker 1: today's episode, I'll be introducing UH wonder full person who 85 00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:05,320 Speaker 1: I consider a great friend, a beautiful leader in this space, 86 00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:10,000 Speaker 1: and someone who deeply, deeply works this process and shows 87 00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:13,440 Speaker 1: up with the work. My special guest today's name is 88 00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:17,839 Speaker 1: Minoj Dias. So since first being introduced to the magic 89 00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:22,279 Speaker 1: meditation decades ago and embarking on his own journey, MINOJH 90 00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:25,760 Speaker 1: Dias has helped thousands of people to embrace stillness of 91 00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:29,960 Speaker 1: mind and body, enabling them to live fearlessly on the 92 00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:33,760 Speaker 1: path to a happier and more meaningful life. His teaching 93 00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:38,799 Speaker 1: and practice is informed by Buddhist philosophy, psychology, and social 94 00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:43,599 Speaker 1: justice principles, with an emphasis on promoting diversity and inclusion 95 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:47,960 Speaker 1: in the wellness space. After training under renowned teachers, Minoja 96 00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:51,680 Speaker 1: has based himself between the US and Australia for the 97 00:06:51,720 --> 00:06:56,240 Speaker 1: past five years, teaching meditation and mindfulness across both continents. 98 00:06:56,839 --> 00:07:00,520 Speaker 1: In two thousand and fifteen, he founded a Space, Australia's 99 00:07:00,560 --> 00:07:04,640 Speaker 1: first drop in meditation studio, and he became the co 100 00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:08,960 Speaker 1: founder of Open California based wellness platform. He is also 101 00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:11,800 Speaker 1: the co founder of the Australian New Zealand arm of 102 00:07:11,880 --> 00:07:17,320 Speaker 1: every Man, a men's emotional intelligent movement. So welcome to 103 00:07:17,360 --> 00:07:22,520 Speaker 1: the show, my friend, minoj Dis Hello, Hello, my beautiful friend. 104 00:07:22,640 --> 00:07:24,960 Speaker 1: Nice to see your face, So good to see you. 105 00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:27,040 Speaker 1: It is so good to spend time with you. A 106 00:07:27,200 --> 00:07:29,600 Speaker 1: little background on me and Minose, we kind of met 107 00:07:29,600 --> 00:07:32,640 Speaker 1: through the Choper universe, UM, through a very wonderful mutual 108 00:07:32,680 --> 00:07:36,160 Speaker 1: friend of ours, and then we found ourselves one evening 109 00:07:36,240 --> 00:07:42,680 Speaker 1: in Venice having UM, a delicious chicken meal, also people 110 00:07:42,720 --> 00:07:47,040 Speaker 1: watching UM, but having really beautiful, beautiful conversation. And I know, 111 00:07:47,240 --> 00:07:49,360 Speaker 1: I felt like when we were sitting there breaking bread 112 00:07:49,400 --> 00:07:52,200 Speaker 1: and talking about the world and talking about our souls 113 00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:54,920 Speaker 1: and talking about God, I just felt, um, I just 114 00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:58,000 Speaker 1: felt deeply connected. And I've I've loved your work from Afar, 115 00:07:58,240 --> 00:08:00,960 Speaker 1: I love following you on social I've had the chance 116 00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:03,680 Speaker 1: to peek into some of your gorgeous meditations, and so 117 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:06,800 Speaker 1: I'm really excited to have you on the show today. Uh, Debbie, 118 00:08:06,840 --> 00:08:09,560 Speaker 1: thank you. And I felt exactly the same way. And 119 00:08:09,640 --> 00:08:12,360 Speaker 1: I think I left because I just moved from from 120 00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:15,440 Speaker 1: Australia to l A and then you were like you 121 00:08:15,560 --> 00:08:18,040 Speaker 1: and Daline or actually like the first one of the 122 00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:20,840 Speaker 1: first people that I had had to know with in 123 00:08:20,880 --> 00:08:23,280 Speaker 1: the middle of COVID. Right. It was a bit weird 124 00:08:23,320 --> 00:08:25,440 Speaker 1: at that time because no one was really eating out 125 00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:27,800 Speaker 1: and we just kind of had that little little meal 126 00:08:27,880 --> 00:08:30,400 Speaker 1: and it was a really beautiful moment. So yes, I 127 00:08:30,680 --> 00:08:33,600 Speaker 1: definitely feel the same way. Yeah, So how's your heart 128 00:08:33,679 --> 00:08:35,480 Speaker 1: right now? How are you feeling as we're coming on 129 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:39,200 Speaker 1: the other side of what has been um for those 130 00:08:39,280 --> 00:08:43,280 Speaker 1: living in this moment in time, probably the most challenging 131 00:08:43,320 --> 00:08:46,320 Speaker 1: moment in human history for us, How are you feeling 132 00:08:46,480 --> 00:08:51,520 Speaker 1: coming into your new normal in this new country. Um. Yeah, 133 00:08:51,559 --> 00:08:54,600 Speaker 1: in the midst of this, I think it's it's holding 134 00:08:54,600 --> 00:08:59,000 Speaker 1: a lot, really, you know, like it's it's it's holding grief, 135 00:08:59,040 --> 00:09:05,120 Speaker 1: it's holding excitement, it's holding space. Um. But I you know, 136 00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:07,679 Speaker 1: it's hard to get so excited where so many things 137 00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:10,240 Speaker 1: are still happening all around the world, and you know, 138 00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:13,760 Speaker 1: we're now seeing things happening in India and Colombia, We're 139 00:09:13,800 --> 00:09:18,520 Speaker 1: seeing you know, ongoing police brutality, and it just sometimes 140 00:09:18,520 --> 00:09:21,000 Speaker 1: feels like it's so much, you know, it's so much. 141 00:09:21,400 --> 00:09:23,520 Speaker 1: And then I just realized, like this is just life, 142 00:09:23,679 --> 00:09:28,040 Speaker 1: Like life has always being inherently unstable, and it's always 143 00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:31,400 Speaker 1: being full of ups and downs and pain and sorrow. 144 00:09:31,520 --> 00:09:35,160 Speaker 1: And we have this saying in Buddhism that life contains 145 00:09:35,640 --> 00:09:38,800 Speaker 1: ten thou joys and ten thous sorrows, and the very 146 00:09:38,840 --> 00:09:41,400 Speaker 1: much feels like that, you know, like I am also 147 00:09:41,440 --> 00:09:44,320 Speaker 1: holding space for new things and for love and for 148 00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:48,280 Speaker 1: um compassion and for friendship, which is all really beautiful 149 00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:50,320 Speaker 1: and and I also know on the other side of 150 00:09:50,320 --> 00:09:56,240 Speaker 1: that is the opposite. I really love that you anchor 151 00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:58,400 Speaker 1: the conversation and that to start, because I would really 152 00:09:58,400 --> 00:10:02,200 Speaker 1: love to speak to that I've been observing even within myself. UM, 153 00:10:02,240 --> 00:10:04,600 Speaker 1: and this is I mean, this is actually something I've 154 00:10:04,640 --> 00:10:06,760 Speaker 1: observed my whole life about me that I think I 155 00:10:06,880 --> 00:10:09,880 Speaker 1: used to think was just something I experience, but now 156 00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:13,360 Speaker 1: I'm knowing and learning that it's actually by design for 157 00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:18,800 Speaker 1: the human experience. UM. But that I exist in a 158 00:10:18,880 --> 00:10:23,439 Speaker 1: space where seven things are beautiful and terrifying all at once, 159 00:10:24,679 --> 00:10:26,959 Speaker 1: you know, and sitting even with that grief and I've 160 00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:29,880 Speaker 1: shared on the show before, UM, I think I get 161 00:10:29,920 --> 00:10:32,160 Speaker 1: paid a picture for how grief exists inside of me 162 00:10:32,200 --> 00:10:36,040 Speaker 1: because I'm I'm equal parts kind of exuberance, radiance, peace, 163 00:10:36,320 --> 00:10:39,400 Speaker 1: and grief all the time. And a lot of that 164 00:10:39,520 --> 00:10:42,040 Speaker 1: is from losing a lot of people to violence in 165 00:10:42,080 --> 00:10:44,880 Speaker 1: my life, and um, you know, all the things, all 166 00:10:44,920 --> 00:10:48,120 Speaker 1: the things, but it's kind of I experienced it like this, 167 00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:50,680 Speaker 1: like with my son right he um, he turns three 168 00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:57,480 Speaker 1: actually tomorrow he I grieve him every day because he 169 00:10:57,520 --> 00:11:01,640 Speaker 1: becomes a new person. But every single day I'm also 170 00:11:01,760 --> 00:11:06,000 Speaker 1: like enthralled and inspired with all the facets of police 171 00:11:06,040 --> 00:11:10,160 Speaker 1: becoming And both happened at the exact same time for me. Yeah, 172 00:11:10,280 --> 00:11:13,640 Speaker 1: And you set it right there in that last paragraph 173 00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:17,880 Speaker 1: where we're grieving and we're grieving moments that we didn't 174 00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:21,360 Speaker 1: know grief, right Like it was a year in which 175 00:11:21,440 --> 00:11:26,840 Speaker 1: we were grieving possibilities. Like we're grieving relationships, we're grieving 176 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:31,560 Speaker 1: um friendships, we're grieving the ability to go to the gym, 177 00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:35,840 Speaker 1: We're grieving what what might have been. And this has 178 00:11:35,840 --> 00:11:39,880 Speaker 1: obviously been more profound for for many of us, but 179 00:11:39,920 --> 00:11:42,280 Speaker 1: I think we're still living with the remnants of that 180 00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:45,560 Speaker 1: in our bodies. And just because we've got the vaccine 181 00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:49,080 Speaker 1: and life seems to go back to normal. It doesn't 182 00:11:49,080 --> 00:11:52,280 Speaker 1: mean the trauma of the grief has left us, So 183 00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:54,800 Speaker 1: now is the work. It's like, you know, my daughter's 184 00:11:55,720 --> 00:11:59,000 Speaker 1: in Australia and I spoke to her recently and she's 185 00:11:59,040 --> 00:12:01,240 Speaker 1: having a lot of social anxiety. It's like, I don't 186 00:12:01,280 --> 00:12:04,280 Speaker 1: know how to return to the world, especially if you're 187 00:12:04,320 --> 00:12:08,120 Speaker 1: locked up indoors for twenty three hours a day for 188 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:11,120 Speaker 1: seven months, Like, how do you then go from that 189 00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:14,599 Speaker 1: to just life is normal and you know, everything is 190 00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:17,120 Speaker 1: back to normal where it's not for many of us. 191 00:12:17,160 --> 00:12:19,960 Speaker 1: And I think we'll start to understand that over the 192 00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:23,440 Speaker 1: next few months and years and maybe even lifetimes what 193 00:12:23,480 --> 00:12:29,320 Speaker 1: we have just experienced. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I think for me, 194 00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:32,560 Speaker 1: my intention is really to keep my life closer to 195 00:12:32,640 --> 00:12:35,600 Speaker 1: what my pandemic life look like than actually trying to 196 00:12:35,600 --> 00:12:38,840 Speaker 1: get back to what it was before, right, right, And 197 00:12:38,880 --> 00:12:42,400 Speaker 1: it's it's it's so profound to we even say that 198 00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:45,040 Speaker 1: my view on the world, which is what you're saying, 199 00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:48,080 Speaker 1: has changed. And I kind of like this and that's 200 00:12:48,120 --> 00:12:51,560 Speaker 1: okay too, right, because it gave us, like I said, 201 00:12:51,600 --> 00:12:55,240 Speaker 1: ten thousand joys, ten thousand sorrows and lessons and also 202 00:12:55,360 --> 00:12:58,640 Speaker 1: trauma and I think part of our work as meditators 203 00:12:59,040 --> 00:13:01,800 Speaker 1: is the whole space for all of these things, not 204 00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:05,960 Speaker 1: just positivity and not just happiness, but also everything else 205 00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:09,840 Speaker 1: that surrounds that, because I believe that's how wisdom grows, 206 00:13:10,440 --> 00:13:14,120 Speaker 1: and as wisdom grows, compassion grows. And I want to 207 00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:16,840 Speaker 1: move through my life through with those two things, like 208 00:13:16,920 --> 00:13:19,640 Speaker 1: wisdom and compassion, and I know if I can, then 209 00:13:19,720 --> 00:13:23,720 Speaker 1: I can face anything that comes my way. Mmmm, that's 210 00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:28,480 Speaker 1: so beautiful. Can you share with me some of your 211 00:13:28,559 --> 00:13:32,320 Speaker 1: Buddhist lineage? How did you find that particular path and 212 00:13:32,360 --> 00:13:35,440 Speaker 1: why did it speak to you? Well, first of all, 213 00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:39,240 Speaker 1: I don't think I necessarily picked it, but I was 214 00:13:39,280 --> 00:13:43,439 Speaker 1: born into it. My family was. I was raised in 215 00:13:43,520 --> 00:13:46,960 Speaker 1: Sho Lunka, and from a very young age, monks were 216 00:13:46,960 --> 00:13:50,320 Speaker 1: in our house. We were doing ceremonies, and Shi Lunka 217 00:13:50,360 --> 00:13:54,560 Speaker 1: itself is a very deeply Buddhist and spiritual place, and 218 00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:57,960 Speaker 1: I wasn't necessarily drawn to their teachings from a young age, 219 00:13:57,960 --> 00:14:01,080 Speaker 1: but there was just a fascination around their aura and 220 00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:04,680 Speaker 1: their energy. They were always laughing, they were always calm. 221 00:14:05,120 --> 00:14:09,559 Speaker 1: They had funny faces with bald heads, and my dad 222 00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:12,320 Speaker 1: told me the story, you know, when I was in 223 00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:15,840 Speaker 1: my late teens that he from a very young age, 224 00:14:15,880 --> 00:14:17,960 Speaker 1: I was drawn to them and drawn to the practice 225 00:14:18,040 --> 00:14:20,000 Speaker 1: because I would see them walking on the sides of 226 00:14:20,040 --> 00:14:22,800 Speaker 1: the roads, and whenever I would see them, I would 227 00:14:22,800 --> 00:14:25,240 Speaker 1: get up from the car, like when I was seated, 228 00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:27,680 Speaker 1: I put my hands together like in a prayer position, 229 00:14:27,680 --> 00:14:30,360 Speaker 1: and I would bow. And he used to get really scared, 230 00:14:30,440 --> 00:14:33,320 Speaker 1: because usually what that means if a child does that 231 00:14:33,360 --> 00:14:36,200 Speaker 1: from a young age, is that he wants to become 232 00:14:36,720 --> 00:14:38,760 Speaker 1: a monk. He wants to take robes, and he wants 233 00:14:38,800 --> 00:14:40,960 Speaker 1: to go down that path. So he used to joke 234 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:43,040 Speaker 1: around saying he used to get my mom to hide him. 235 00:14:43,080 --> 00:14:44,840 Speaker 1: He's like, make sure he doesn't see, like you know, 236 00:14:44,920 --> 00:14:48,400 Speaker 1: these months and it's ironic, you know, Like thirty odd 237 00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:51,560 Speaker 1: years later, here I am being in a meditation teacher. 238 00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:56,720 Speaker 1: But there was always a fascination with what existed beyond me. 239 00:14:57,760 --> 00:15:00,280 Speaker 1: And I didn't know if that was God, I didn't 240 00:15:00,320 --> 00:15:03,240 Speaker 1: know if that was consciousness. I didn't know what it 241 00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:06,160 Speaker 1: really meant. But I knew that there was something bigger 242 00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:09,240 Speaker 1: than me that existed in the world. At least I 243 00:15:09,280 --> 00:15:12,160 Speaker 1: believe that, even if I didn't know it. But you know, 244 00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:15,520 Speaker 1: when we migrated to Australia, I really lost a lot 245 00:15:15,520 --> 00:15:19,480 Speaker 1: of that because the culture was very different. Um. And then, 246 00:15:19,560 --> 00:15:22,320 Speaker 1: you know, I had a pretty normal upbringing. I mean 247 00:15:22,360 --> 00:15:24,760 Speaker 1: I would say normal upbringing, but I had an upbringing. 248 00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:28,160 Speaker 1: And I started working and one day I was in 249 00:15:28,440 --> 00:15:32,640 Speaker 1: marketing and advertising. One day I had a pretty serious 250 00:15:32,720 --> 00:15:38,080 Speaker 1: and big panic attack. And that was like the catalyst 251 00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:41,080 Speaker 1: for everything in my life. I went to different doctors 252 00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:46,920 Speaker 1: and psychologists and healers and just tried to get well 253 00:15:46,960 --> 00:15:49,280 Speaker 1: and tried to get better because at that point I 254 00:15:49,400 --> 00:15:54,440 Speaker 1: developed an eating disorder. It was really anxious. I had depression. UM, 255 00:15:54,480 --> 00:15:58,920 Speaker 1: I was misdiagnosed with a d h D and eventually 256 00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:03,560 Speaker 1: ended up developed developing an addiction to prescription medication. And 257 00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:06,160 Speaker 1: so I was in a really bad place. And every 258 00:16:06,240 --> 00:16:09,520 Speaker 1: doctor I was seeing, a psychologist I was seeing, we're 259 00:16:09,600 --> 00:16:12,560 Speaker 1: just giving me different opinions. You know. One it said 260 00:16:12,600 --> 00:16:15,960 Speaker 1: it's just anxiety or it's just stress. One said it's 261 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:18,160 Speaker 1: a d h D. And another one it's like, no, 262 00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:22,200 Speaker 1: it's depression, and take this medication and take this medication. Eventually, 263 00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:25,240 Speaker 1: I was just like, intuitively, I had a feeling that 264 00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:28,520 Speaker 1: I don't think it is like there's something else that 265 00:16:28,600 --> 00:16:30,680 Speaker 1: was going on for me. And I'm sure all of 266 00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:33,240 Speaker 1: that was part of my my suffering at the time, 267 00:16:33,440 --> 00:16:36,479 Speaker 1: no doubt, But I just wasn't drawn to the medication. 268 00:16:36,680 --> 00:16:39,760 Speaker 1: And I don't have anything against medication. I think it's 269 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:43,120 Speaker 1: really impotent and powerful and needed from time to time. 270 00:16:43,440 --> 00:16:45,080 Speaker 1: But for me, I had a feeling that I just 271 00:16:45,160 --> 00:16:50,520 Speaker 1: needed to just go somewhere. And I didn't go anywhere, 272 00:16:50,560 --> 00:16:53,880 Speaker 1: but randomly I found myself one day in a yoga 273 00:16:53,960 --> 00:16:57,320 Speaker 1: studio and this yoga teacher turned out to be a 274 00:16:57,320 --> 00:17:02,360 Speaker 1: Buddhist meditation teacher, and and that very first class, he 275 00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:06,320 Speaker 1: said that you are not your suffering, and you are 276 00:17:06,720 --> 00:17:09,840 Speaker 1: you are not your thoughts. And that was a very 277 00:17:09,880 --> 00:17:13,879 Speaker 1: profound moment for me, because, um, first of all, I 278 00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:17,439 Speaker 1: started to notice my thoughts in that moment. I started 279 00:17:17,480 --> 00:17:21,760 Speaker 1: to notice all the negative thoughts like you're you're useless, 280 00:17:21,760 --> 00:17:25,280 Speaker 1: You're never going to get better again, Um, you're worthless, 281 00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:27,520 Speaker 1: like your how are you going to look after your daughter? 282 00:17:27,920 --> 00:17:29,399 Speaker 1: What are you going to have for lunch? And I 283 00:17:29,520 --> 00:17:32,520 Speaker 1: always weird thoughts running through my mind. And then I 284 00:17:32,600 --> 00:17:36,320 Speaker 1: noticed myself observing those thoughts. And then when he said 285 00:17:36,440 --> 00:17:38,919 Speaker 1: that you're not you're suffering. I'm like, well, maybe I 286 00:17:38,920 --> 00:17:41,680 Speaker 1: can observe my suffering the same way I can observe 287 00:17:41,720 --> 00:17:47,080 Speaker 1: my thoughts. And you know that very first class, something 288 00:17:47,119 --> 00:17:49,280 Speaker 1: began to click and I slept better than I ever 289 00:17:49,359 --> 00:17:52,480 Speaker 1: had before. And I came back the next day, the 290 00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:54,879 Speaker 1: next day, and the next day, and I ended up 291 00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:58,400 Speaker 1: studying with him every day for five years. And I 292 00:17:58,560 --> 00:18:01,040 Speaker 1: legitimately thought at one point, you know, was going to 293 00:18:01,119 --> 00:18:03,160 Speaker 1: take rooms in and was going to be a monk, 294 00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:07,840 Speaker 1: but decided against it. And I started teaching only because 295 00:18:07,880 --> 00:18:12,320 Speaker 1: he asked me to teach one day, and the rest 296 00:18:12,440 --> 00:18:18,160 Speaker 1: is kind of history. I guess, wow, wow, So there's 297 00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:22,000 Speaker 1: a lot I want to dive into their um. First 298 00:18:22,040 --> 00:18:24,600 Speaker 1: things first, because you took me on an epic journey. 299 00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:31,160 Speaker 1: Just now, First things first, I think, you know, it's 300 00:18:31,200 --> 00:18:34,720 Speaker 1: so interesting. So you were raised, you were raised Buddhist, 301 00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:38,040 Speaker 1: and so that was your foundation. And I hope I'm 302 00:18:38,040 --> 00:18:40,640 Speaker 1: going to be able to unravel this in the way 303 00:18:40,680 --> 00:18:43,600 Speaker 1: that it's coming together in my mind. But I'm not 304 00:18:43,680 --> 00:18:47,000 Speaker 1: someone that was ever raised with any religions or beliefs, right, um, 305 00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:50,480 Speaker 1: not at all. I was aware of Christianity, I was 306 00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:53,879 Speaker 1: aware of Catholicism. Um. I was born and raised in 307 00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:56,159 Speaker 1: l A and so even though there wasn't like a 308 00:18:57,160 --> 00:19:00,440 Speaker 1: back in the eighties, a robust meditation community, I was 309 00:19:00,520 --> 00:19:03,359 Speaker 1: always seeing Buddhas everywhere, and I was always seeing different 310 00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:06,720 Speaker 1: beliefs that play in different cultures. Um. So I was 311 00:19:06,760 --> 00:19:14,280 Speaker 1: always profoundly, deeply intrigued by these cultural systems and by beliefs. UM. 312 00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:17,600 Speaker 1: But my journey, I really found it because I was 313 00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:20,960 Speaker 1: just in such deep longing for God um. And that's 314 00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:24,159 Speaker 1: the resounding feeling I remember always feeling. It was this 315 00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:29,520 Speaker 1: nine desire to know God more deeply um, and trying 316 00:19:29,560 --> 00:19:33,440 Speaker 1: to find the pathways there. But you know, it's interesting 317 00:19:33,520 --> 00:19:38,560 Speaker 1: because even though you Buddhism is such a gorgeous, such 318 00:19:38,600 --> 00:19:41,560 Speaker 1: a gorgeous path, and you were raised with it, and 319 00:19:41,600 --> 00:19:45,000 Speaker 1: you were raised with the knowledge of how to utilize it. 320 00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:48,280 Speaker 1: Yet isn't it so interesting how even when we strive 321 00:19:48,359 --> 00:19:50,800 Speaker 1: to raise our children in certain ways with these structures 322 00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:54,120 Speaker 1: and beliefs kind of as humanity, we still find ourselves 323 00:19:54,119 --> 00:19:57,240 Speaker 1: at the crossroad where we have to choose something for ourselves. 324 00:19:57,320 --> 00:20:01,200 Speaker 1: And you ended up choosing the lineage that you actually 325 00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:03,280 Speaker 1: was already so deep in your heart but it was 326 00:20:03,320 --> 00:20:07,160 Speaker 1: still a very specific choice you made, and so even 327 00:20:07,200 --> 00:20:11,280 Speaker 1: the system of belief that you were raised with, there 328 00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:15,959 Speaker 1: was a moment where you received it more deeply, applied 329 00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:19,840 Speaker 1: it potentially in new ways, and then cured yourself of 330 00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:22,760 Speaker 1: your suffering. Um. So I would just love any thoughts 331 00:20:22,800 --> 00:20:26,640 Speaker 1: or observations on that. Yeah, And so maybe I'll start 332 00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:29,440 Speaker 1: at the end where I don't think I've cured myself 333 00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:32,480 Speaker 1: from my suffering. I've learned how to relate to my 334 00:20:32,600 --> 00:20:36,280 Speaker 1: suffering differently. And I think that's an important distinction, because 335 00:20:36,320 --> 00:20:40,240 Speaker 1: we can think that meditation and spirituality can cure us 336 00:20:40,400 --> 00:20:44,160 Speaker 1: of our ailments, and that's actually a way of bypassing 337 00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:47,120 Speaker 1: the experience of itself. Right. You know, I still get 338 00:20:47,160 --> 00:20:50,359 Speaker 1: anxious from time to time. I'm still neurotic from time 339 00:20:50,359 --> 00:20:53,760 Speaker 1: to time. I get very angry often, you know, I'll 340 00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:56,639 Speaker 1: binge ee, you know, I'll crave cigarettes. Like. All of 341 00:20:56,680 --> 00:20:59,240 Speaker 1: that is is still very much in my experience, but 342 00:20:59,760 --> 00:21:03,520 Speaker 1: now related to I've learned how to relate to my 343 00:21:03,680 --> 00:21:07,000 Speaker 1: suffering and my thoughts around the suffering a lot a 344 00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:10,400 Speaker 1: lot more differently. But I think also what's really interesting 345 00:21:10,480 --> 00:21:14,600 Speaker 1: is I was although I was raised around Buddhism. Buddhism 346 00:21:14,600 --> 00:21:18,000 Speaker 1: and Sri Lanka is more focused on the practice of it, 347 00:21:18,080 --> 00:21:23,280 Speaker 1: so more around the worship, more around generosity and cultivation 348 00:21:23,320 --> 00:21:27,879 Speaker 1: of generosity. There was no impetus to practice meditation like 349 00:21:27,920 --> 00:21:29,960 Speaker 1: that just isn't part of the culture in a lot 350 00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:33,920 Speaker 1: of Asian countries. Actually, But I think what you said 351 00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:37,200 Speaker 1: is really true is that there's a crossroads in our 352 00:21:37,240 --> 00:21:41,119 Speaker 1: life and we were each presented with with moments you 353 00:21:41,160 --> 00:21:44,080 Speaker 1: know that they're defining moments in our life, and for 354 00:21:44,160 --> 00:21:47,640 Speaker 1: me it was a divine or defining I'm not sure 355 00:21:47,680 --> 00:21:50,359 Speaker 1: how to separate the two. It was a moment when 356 00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:53,639 Speaker 1: someone was saying something very practical to me and it 357 00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:57,080 Speaker 1: wasn't shrouded in Buddhism at all. Actually, he was like, hey, 358 00:21:58,440 --> 00:22:02,400 Speaker 1: life contains suffering and I was like, sh yeah, it does. 359 00:22:02,680 --> 00:22:05,200 Speaker 1: Like no one's ever said that to me like that before. 360 00:22:05,800 --> 00:22:08,840 Speaker 1: And then it was like, you're suffering isn't personal, And 361 00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:12,800 Speaker 1: I'm like wow, because you know, when we're going through something, 362 00:22:12,840 --> 00:22:16,959 Speaker 1: it's like I am anxious, I am suffering, I am lonely, 363 00:22:17,040 --> 00:22:19,560 Speaker 1: I am the victim. And that might be true, but 364 00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:22,520 Speaker 1: then you realize so all of us, right, we're all 365 00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:27,240 Speaker 1: traumatized to some extent. We're all going to experience this 366 00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:30,600 Speaker 1: at some point in our life and that creates a separation. 367 00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:34,119 Speaker 1: And that for me was just someone saying something very practical. 368 00:22:34,560 --> 00:22:36,960 Speaker 1: I didn't decide at that moment I'm going to reconnect 369 00:22:36,960 --> 00:22:40,280 Speaker 1: to Buddhism. It was much later on where I just 370 00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:43,280 Speaker 1: studied with various teachers and it made so much sense 371 00:22:43,280 --> 00:22:46,280 Speaker 1: to me. And that's really what I take from these 372 00:22:46,280 --> 00:22:48,760 Speaker 1: teachings that it just makes a lot of sense, and 373 00:22:49,200 --> 00:22:53,800 Speaker 1: it's it doesn't require me to give up any other belief. 374 00:22:54,240 --> 00:22:57,840 Speaker 1: It doesn't require me to take on this as being 375 00:22:57,960 --> 00:23:00,919 Speaker 1: true and everything is being false. It's like this is 376 00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:04,879 Speaker 1: just a recipe for how to navigate my mind and 377 00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:10,000 Speaker 1: my life. And that just felt very, very serendipitous to me. 378 00:23:12,359 --> 00:23:15,720 Speaker 1: I love that so much. UM. I still relate to that, 379 00:23:15,880 --> 00:23:19,960 Speaker 1: and it changes the perspective of how we approach any 380 00:23:20,000 --> 00:23:22,840 Speaker 1: and everything, you know, it puts us more instead of 381 00:23:22,840 --> 00:23:28,800 Speaker 1: these like passive participants, we become active participants in our lives, 382 00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:33,119 Speaker 1: are co creators, you know. I think UM meditation for 383 00:23:33,280 --> 00:23:38,040 Speaker 1: me really expanded my knowingness of the choice, the power 384 00:23:38,080 --> 00:23:41,320 Speaker 1: of choice that I hold UM and my ability to 385 00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:44,239 Speaker 1: pivot whenever the hell I want to, you know, like 386 00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:47,280 Speaker 1: your ability to just pick and choose what is for 387 00:23:47,359 --> 00:23:50,359 Speaker 1: me and not take things I don't even take my 388 00:23:50,359 --> 00:23:54,800 Speaker 1: own criticisms of myself personally, you know. And really it's 389 00:23:54,800 --> 00:23:58,680 Speaker 1: the beauty of mindfulness, right, It gives us, It gives us, uh, 390 00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:02,600 Speaker 1: that gap, that space between a stimulus and a response. 391 00:24:03,280 --> 00:24:05,760 Speaker 1: And I think what you're talking about is just your 392 00:24:05,800 --> 00:24:09,840 Speaker 1: wisdom in knowing that, over the years of your own practice, 393 00:24:09,880 --> 00:24:13,680 Speaker 1: you've created these moments of gaps between stimulus and response, 394 00:24:14,280 --> 00:24:17,439 Speaker 1: and you get to choose wisely at that moment. You know, 395 00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:21,360 Speaker 1: you get to choose something that leads towards happiness and 396 00:24:21,480 --> 00:24:26,240 Speaker 1: away from suffering. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. You have a book 397 00:24:27,040 --> 00:24:32,040 Speaker 1: that is coming. Um may to be exact, your book 398 00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:35,720 Speaker 1: Still Together will be hitting shelves. It's available for preorder now. 399 00:24:35,800 --> 00:24:39,080 Speaker 1: Everybody listening, so please go on this page, going Amazon, 400 00:24:39,160 --> 00:24:42,639 Speaker 1: go to wherever you connect with your books. Um. Still 401 00:24:42,680 --> 00:24:44,760 Speaker 1: Together is a title, and I know you know the 402 00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:47,399 Speaker 1: background on the book. It takes an active approach to 403 00:24:47,440 --> 00:24:50,560 Speaker 1: reclaiming true and deep connection in our day to day lives, 404 00:24:50,800 --> 00:24:55,280 Speaker 1: looking at the feelings associated with disconnection. This guide presents 405 00:24:55,320 --> 00:24:59,680 Speaker 1: steps through meditation and mindfulness practices to address these feelings. 406 00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:06,240 Speaker 1: Oh the world needs this. Yeah, I mean the irony 407 00:25:06,359 --> 00:25:09,919 Speaker 1: of writing a book about connection when I'm disconnected just 408 00:25:10,119 --> 00:25:13,840 Speaker 1: wasn't It wasn't lost on me, you know, and speak 409 00:25:13,920 --> 00:25:17,720 Speaker 1: to that. Yeah. I mean. So, I don't know if 410 00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:20,240 Speaker 1: I've said this to you personally before, but I signed 411 00:25:20,240 --> 00:25:24,960 Speaker 1: the book deal in and as you probably know, I'm 412 00:25:25,119 --> 00:25:28,400 Speaker 1: very unorganized. So I signed it and I'm like, Okay, 413 00:25:28,440 --> 00:25:30,959 Speaker 1: I'll have some time to write it. And literally seven 414 00:25:30,960 --> 00:25:34,240 Speaker 1: months I didn't touch it. I'm just living my best life. 415 00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:36,359 Speaker 1: I was in New York City. I was like, just 416 00:25:36,600 --> 00:25:40,920 Speaker 1: life is great. And then around January and of January 417 00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:43,879 Speaker 1: my publishers like, hey, like, can you what's happening with 418 00:25:43,920 --> 00:25:45,600 Speaker 1: the manuscript that you're going to get it through to us? 419 00:25:45,640 --> 00:25:47,880 Speaker 1: And I'm like, I'm going to start it as soon 420 00:25:47,920 --> 00:25:50,320 Speaker 1: as I get back to Australia, which was the next week. 421 00:25:50,800 --> 00:25:54,159 Speaker 1: And I just got back to Australia and that's when 422 00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:58,960 Speaker 1: COVID like really spread into Australia and the US and 423 00:25:59,400 --> 00:26:03,000 Speaker 1: we went into lockdown and so we were only allowed 424 00:26:03,040 --> 00:26:06,119 Speaker 1: out for one hour a day. Uh And for seven 425 00:26:06,160 --> 00:26:09,399 Speaker 1: months I was living by myself and then all of 426 00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:11,760 Speaker 1: a sudden, I was like, I've got to write a 427 00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:17,120 Speaker 1: book about connection when I'm disconnected with one, and it 428 00:26:17,240 --> 00:26:22,760 Speaker 1: really helped me. But it also it also really inspired 429 00:26:22,800 --> 00:26:26,840 Speaker 1: me to practice what I was writing, you know, because 430 00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:29,440 Speaker 1: it wasn't just I was writing it to sell a book. 431 00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:33,119 Speaker 1: It was like, I'm writing this to actually kill myself, 432 00:26:33,960 --> 00:26:36,720 Speaker 1: and you know, it just took on a life of 433 00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:39,320 Speaker 1: its own, to be really honest with you, and a 434 00:26:39,359 --> 00:26:41,600 Speaker 1: lot of the book explores the way that, you know, 435 00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:44,960 Speaker 1: in modern life, we disconnect, you know, we disconnect from 436 00:26:45,000 --> 00:26:48,359 Speaker 1: each other, We disconnect from our bodies, and when our 437 00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:51,960 Speaker 1: bodies are feeling and we disconnect from the present moment, 438 00:26:52,160 --> 00:26:57,240 Speaker 1: and that has consequences and ramifications. And then it's it's 439 00:26:57,240 --> 00:27:01,120 Speaker 1: a call to arms too to reconnect, especially to reconnect 440 00:27:01,160 --> 00:27:03,720 Speaker 1: with people that we don't agree with or we don't 441 00:27:03,760 --> 00:27:06,200 Speaker 1: think that we have anything in common with. And it's 442 00:27:06,240 --> 00:27:08,800 Speaker 1: also a call to arms to reconnect with our bodies, 443 00:27:08,840 --> 00:27:12,640 Speaker 1: because we tend to as a culture, focus a lot 444 00:27:12,680 --> 00:27:14,920 Speaker 1: on the mind, you know, our mind, like where it 445 00:27:15,040 --> 00:27:20,920 Speaker 1: was so obsessed with happiness and productivity and focus and achieving. 446 00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:25,400 Speaker 1: We completely disconnect from the neck down and from the feeling, 447 00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:30,600 Speaker 1: from the intuition, from the sense of coming home. And 448 00:27:30,680 --> 00:27:35,720 Speaker 1: we realize in a year like one matraumatized, the healing 449 00:27:35,760 --> 00:27:37,800 Speaker 1: begins in the body. It doesn't begin in the mind, 450 00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:40,919 Speaker 1: because we can tell ourselves, yes, life is going back 451 00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:44,000 Speaker 1: to normal, but really the body hasn't caught up yet. 452 00:27:44,119 --> 00:27:46,080 Speaker 1: And for me, that's where I've had to do a 453 00:27:46,119 --> 00:27:49,639 Speaker 1: lot of the work with my trauma is to create 454 00:27:49,680 --> 00:27:54,400 Speaker 1: space for compassion to to exist for for the pain. 455 00:27:55,320 --> 00:28:03,320 Speaker 1: M Yeah, yeah, I think so many people listening to 456 00:28:03,359 --> 00:28:06,360 Speaker 1: this show especially can really relate to that. A conversation 457 00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:09,480 Speaker 1: that we have quite a bit here is reconnecting to 458 00:28:09,560 --> 00:28:15,719 Speaker 1: your body and also um understanding what has kept us 459 00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:18,920 Speaker 1: separate because you know, I think, especially here, like sometimes 460 00:28:19,240 --> 00:28:22,440 Speaker 1: our disconnection from our body is one million percent rooted 461 00:28:22,440 --> 00:28:24,960 Speaker 1: in trauma. But then also you know, for a lot 462 00:28:24,960 --> 00:28:26,720 Speaker 1: of us here in America, when you live in this 463 00:28:26,880 --> 00:28:33,480 Speaker 1: system of structural, systemic oppression since the dawn of society here, 464 00:28:33,680 --> 00:28:36,520 Speaker 1: you know, when you are anything other than white, you 465 00:28:36,640 --> 00:28:39,600 Speaker 1: have never felt safe in your body. Potentially, you know, 466 00:28:40,440 --> 00:28:43,120 Speaker 1: and you take on this against us of always imagining 467 00:28:43,120 --> 00:28:45,200 Speaker 1: that it's you or something wrong with you, And I 468 00:28:45,200 --> 00:28:48,200 Speaker 1: think it hits every facet like um, there's so many 469 00:28:48,200 --> 00:28:52,360 Speaker 1: conversations happening around this of even being performative with our 470 00:28:52,360 --> 00:28:57,360 Speaker 1: bodies in so many different ways, from athleticism to even 471 00:28:57,360 --> 00:29:00,840 Speaker 1: the way we experience sex, like it just being performance, 472 00:29:00,920 --> 00:29:05,280 Speaker 1: or even noticing that you're not presently in yourself even 473 00:29:05,360 --> 00:29:09,800 Speaker 1: when you are in movement and flow with your body. Um. 474 00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:12,000 Speaker 1: And it's such as someone who has come back into 475 00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:16,240 Speaker 1: their body, and that's been a huge, huge challenging part 476 00:29:16,280 --> 00:29:20,480 Speaker 1: of my work with my own journey. Can you speak 477 00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:23,320 Speaker 1: to what it feels like to be in your body 478 00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:27,080 Speaker 1: the way that I've been experiencing it. It's just like 479 00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:31,880 Speaker 1: it is just it's a safety I never knew I 480 00:29:31,960 --> 00:29:35,200 Speaker 1: had access to. It is a stability and a piece 481 00:29:35,320 --> 00:29:38,640 Speaker 1: I never even knew was an option until I felt it. 482 00:29:39,880 --> 00:29:42,000 Speaker 1: You know, I felt the essence of what you just said. 483 00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:44,560 Speaker 1: I felt that in my body and just how you 484 00:29:44,640 --> 00:29:47,680 Speaker 1: said it, And that really speaks to it. You know, 485 00:29:47,760 --> 00:29:50,880 Speaker 1: like when you are in your body, you're communicating on 486 00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:53,640 Speaker 1: a whole different level and you're receiving on a whole 487 00:29:53,680 --> 00:29:58,160 Speaker 1: different level, but you're also safe to be yourself. And 488 00:29:58,200 --> 00:30:01,440 Speaker 1: I think for black and brown for here, but also 489 00:30:01,480 --> 00:30:05,280 Speaker 1: probably throughout the world. It doesn't feel safe to be ourselves. 490 00:30:05,760 --> 00:30:10,920 Speaker 1: You know, we are constantly comparing ourselves to culture and 491 00:30:11,000 --> 00:30:13,520 Speaker 1: what culture tells us we have to look like, and 492 00:30:13,520 --> 00:30:17,680 Speaker 1: how culture tells us we have to present ourselves, and 493 00:30:17,720 --> 00:30:23,400 Speaker 1: how culture tones our emotions and our feelings, and so 494 00:30:23,800 --> 00:30:27,320 Speaker 1: being in our body is a strength and it's a courage, 495 00:30:27,920 --> 00:30:31,240 Speaker 1: but it's also a deep love we have for ourselves 496 00:30:31,280 --> 00:30:35,560 Speaker 1: because we can respect ourselves and us to stay in it, 497 00:30:35,840 --> 00:30:39,080 Speaker 1: you know, and we'll never abandon ourselves. I think that 498 00:30:39,200 --> 00:30:42,840 Speaker 1: is the most profound lesson I've learned that when I 499 00:30:42,880 --> 00:30:46,000 Speaker 1: am not in my body, my body, I am abandoning 500 00:30:46,040 --> 00:30:50,480 Speaker 1: myself in thought, in my deed, or in my action, 501 00:30:50,680 --> 00:30:54,400 Speaker 1: I am abandoning myself. And I think about what it 502 00:30:54,440 --> 00:30:57,320 Speaker 1: would be like to abandon my daughter, and it just 503 00:30:57,400 --> 00:31:00,600 Speaker 1: breaks my heart and it just breaks my and I'm like, 504 00:31:01,080 --> 00:31:04,600 Speaker 1: I do that to myself so much. I do that 505 00:31:04,680 --> 00:31:07,520 Speaker 1: to myself so much. And if there is someone with 506 00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:10,200 Speaker 1: a big personality and a big energy and then I 507 00:31:10,280 --> 00:31:13,360 Speaker 1: shrink and I change how I speak or change how 508 00:31:13,360 --> 00:31:17,000 Speaker 1: I show up, I'm abandoning myself if someone makes me 509 00:31:17,080 --> 00:31:20,800 Speaker 1: angry and I don't express that in a healthy way. 510 00:31:21,120 --> 00:31:25,560 Speaker 1: I abandoned myself when I'm presented with love and I 511 00:31:25,600 --> 00:31:30,840 Speaker 1: can't receive that love, I'm abandoning myself. And we all, 512 00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:35,040 Speaker 1: I think we'll have different variations of this, But the 513 00:31:35,120 --> 00:31:39,000 Speaker 1: greatest work of our time, I think, is to remember 514 00:31:39,280 --> 00:31:43,720 Speaker 1: that we are whole and we are complete, and despite 515 00:31:43,760 --> 00:31:47,880 Speaker 1: what the world tells us, hold that thought. We are 516 00:31:47,920 --> 00:31:58,280 Speaker 1: coming right back. You know that is the work, right 517 00:31:58,400 --> 00:32:02,160 Speaker 1: because I find you know, and I probably say this 518 00:32:02,320 --> 00:32:05,520 Speaker 1: every episode, So apologies listeners if you're tired of hearing this, 519 00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:11,240 Speaker 1: but um, you know it, there's so many conversations happening 520 00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:15,160 Speaker 1: about mental health, so many conversations happening about mindfulness. Um, 521 00:32:15,200 --> 00:32:17,360 Speaker 1: and they're expansive, and there's so many facets, Like it's 522 00:32:17,360 --> 00:32:20,240 Speaker 1: such a it's such a vast umbrella with so many 523 00:32:20,240 --> 00:32:23,360 Speaker 1: different lanes underneath it and and so many different pathways. 524 00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:32,760 Speaker 1: But the work is really rooted in that experience of oneself, 525 00:32:34,160 --> 00:32:37,200 Speaker 1: in the fullness of that, So really understanding that like 526 00:32:38,080 --> 00:32:41,000 Speaker 1: on Earth as souls, right, I think we've all kind 527 00:32:41,000 --> 00:32:43,520 Speaker 1: of established that baseline of were spiritual beings having a 528 00:32:43,600 --> 00:32:47,240 Speaker 1: human experience. So shout out to our humanity here on earth, 529 00:32:47,400 --> 00:32:50,360 Speaker 1: you know, as as we're kind of steeped in that 530 00:32:51,320 --> 00:32:55,960 Speaker 1: it's utilizing the gifts and the best assets. Like our 531 00:32:56,120 --> 00:32:59,760 Speaker 1: body is actually our technology, right, like just the way 532 00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:03,360 Speaker 1: you know, a computer we view as a technology and 533 00:33:03,360 --> 00:33:06,160 Speaker 1: and the piece to get the things done that we need, 534 00:33:06,200 --> 00:33:09,640 Speaker 1: whether that's connection or work. As a human being, our 535 00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:13,400 Speaker 1: body is our technology, and so really understanding how to 536 00:33:13,560 --> 00:33:17,120 Speaker 1: be with it and utilize it for your highest good 537 00:33:17,200 --> 00:33:19,400 Speaker 1: as part of what this experience is meant to be. 538 00:33:20,160 --> 00:33:24,320 Speaker 1: I'm curious, you know, as we kind of talk about that, um, 539 00:33:24,360 --> 00:33:26,160 Speaker 1: just to reflect back to how we started this piece 540 00:33:26,200 --> 00:33:28,320 Speaker 1: of the conversation, Like in this leg of my journey, 541 00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:32,880 Speaker 1: I'm even noticing, you know, this is my soul's house. 542 00:33:33,480 --> 00:33:36,640 Speaker 1: This this this bag of bones that I'm in, this 543 00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:39,640 Speaker 1: is my soul's house. And so part of my healing 544 00:33:39,720 --> 00:33:43,320 Speaker 1: now has really just been and honoring that, and so 545 00:33:43,600 --> 00:33:46,320 Speaker 1: you know, really creating ritual around that, really knowing how 546 00:33:46,320 --> 00:33:49,880 Speaker 1: to be with myself and you know, as as as 547 00:33:49,960 --> 00:33:53,240 Speaker 1: a man, I'm curious of what that feels like for you, 548 00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:56,360 Speaker 1: because I think for women were encouraged right to be 549 00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:58,960 Speaker 1: with our bodies, or we're encouraged to be sometimes very 550 00:33:59,000 --> 00:34:01,800 Speaker 1: hyper aware of our body these whether that is, you know, 551 00:34:01,840 --> 00:34:05,240 Speaker 1: from an aesthetic standpoint sexually, but our bodies are always 552 00:34:05,280 --> 00:34:07,800 Speaker 1: at the forefront of our mind um and the forefront 553 00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:11,399 Speaker 1: of everyone else's mind all the time, right, And so 554 00:34:11,640 --> 00:34:14,880 Speaker 1: even in reclaiming that, that's been so powerful because so 555 00:34:14,960 --> 00:34:17,120 Speaker 1: many women and girls are trained to look at their 556 00:34:17,160 --> 00:34:20,880 Speaker 1: bodies um, just in the way it's received by the 557 00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:26,040 Speaker 1: people viewing them outside of ourselves. So that reclamation um, 558 00:34:26,120 --> 00:34:31,120 Speaker 1: sometimes that really looks like even relearning how you want 559 00:34:31,120 --> 00:34:36,680 Speaker 1: to move or what is maybe perceived performative femininity versus 560 00:34:36,719 --> 00:34:40,760 Speaker 1: the deepest part of how you internally want to express 561 00:34:40,800 --> 00:34:44,279 Speaker 1: with your essences. So I'm curious how that feels for 562 00:34:44,360 --> 00:34:46,920 Speaker 1: you or or how you have observed that, either in 563 00:34:46,960 --> 00:34:49,640 Speaker 1: yourself or with all of the men that you really 564 00:34:49,719 --> 00:34:53,719 Speaker 1: help heal. I want to take a moment to see 565 00:34:53,719 --> 00:34:59,280 Speaker 1: how that land, because you just dropped some gems right there, um, 566 00:34:59,320 --> 00:35:02,799 Speaker 1: you know with Really it's so wonderful to speak to 567 00:35:02,880 --> 00:35:06,320 Speaker 1: anyone that's fully embodied. And I think whenever we speak, 568 00:35:06,440 --> 00:35:09,040 Speaker 1: I feel that you know from you like you you 569 00:35:09,120 --> 00:35:11,560 Speaker 1: feel this in your bones, and it's not performative and 570 00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:14,280 Speaker 1: it doesn't come from the head. It comes from the body. 571 00:35:15,320 --> 00:35:17,279 Speaker 1: I think as men were not trained how to be 572 00:35:17,360 --> 00:35:21,160 Speaker 1: in our body. We're so trained to think our way 573 00:35:21,200 --> 00:35:25,319 Speaker 1: through things, you know, and that's why we cause the 574 00:35:25,360 --> 00:35:28,680 Speaker 1: majority of the harm in this world. It's because we're 575 00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:33,279 Speaker 1: so cognized. We think from the head. We don't think 576 00:35:33,320 --> 00:35:36,960 Speaker 1: from the body, and we're not We're not allowed to 577 00:35:37,120 --> 00:35:41,960 Speaker 1: feel anger, We're not allowed to feel softness, we're not 578 00:35:42,040 --> 00:35:45,640 Speaker 1: allowed to feel compassion. We don't know this because many 579 00:35:45,680 --> 00:35:49,920 Speaker 1: of us aren't given that opportunity in our childhood. You know, 580 00:35:50,000 --> 00:35:54,479 Speaker 1: we don't have the best role models. And I think 581 00:35:54,480 --> 00:35:58,560 Speaker 1: our work is as men is not to throw out 582 00:35:58,640 --> 00:36:04,239 Speaker 1: this idea of masculine because yes, there's toxic masculinity and 583 00:36:04,880 --> 00:36:07,400 Speaker 1: all of that, and I don't disagree with that, but 584 00:36:07,520 --> 00:36:10,719 Speaker 1: I think it's to evolve, and it's to also recognize 585 00:36:10,800 --> 00:36:13,759 Speaker 1: the harm that we cause to ourselves and when we 586 00:36:13,840 --> 00:36:17,919 Speaker 1: do that, we cause to everyone else around us. Right, 587 00:36:18,560 --> 00:36:20,759 Speaker 1: And a lot of the work I've done with men 588 00:36:20,880 --> 00:36:23,759 Speaker 1: around the world is to invite them to stay in 589 00:36:23,760 --> 00:36:27,080 Speaker 1: the body when things get uncomfortable, you know, and and 590 00:36:27,120 --> 00:36:30,280 Speaker 1: to be able to acknowledge that and to be able 591 00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:33,200 Speaker 1: to use the rage that's coming up, because you know, 592 00:36:33,320 --> 00:36:35,879 Speaker 1: rage isn't bad. Like I grew up with a very 593 00:36:36,040 --> 00:36:39,960 Speaker 1: very angry father and he yelled and he you know, 594 00:36:40,160 --> 00:36:42,759 Speaker 1: he used to spank me and my my bro and 595 00:36:43,239 --> 00:36:44,680 Speaker 1: you know, I love him to death. He's like an 596 00:36:44,680 --> 00:36:48,520 Speaker 1: amazing father, but you know I experienced that, and now 597 00:36:48,840 --> 00:36:53,080 Speaker 1: in my relationship, any time my anger comes up, I'm like, well, bad, 598 00:36:53,360 --> 00:36:57,279 Speaker 1: get that. Get make sure that's under control. Don't be 599 00:36:57,560 --> 00:37:02,359 Speaker 1: your dad. And even of the intention is pure, the 600 00:37:02,360 --> 00:37:05,400 Speaker 1: the output can be quite harmful to ourselves. Because anger 601 00:37:05,560 --> 00:37:09,239 Speaker 1: isn't bad. Anger is a message, right, Anger is it 602 00:37:09,360 --> 00:37:13,080 Speaker 1: telling you something. But the work is to create space 603 00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:15,279 Speaker 1: for that and then to use that anger in a 604 00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:19,520 Speaker 1: way that doesn't harm others. Right. And that's where men 605 00:37:19,640 --> 00:37:23,640 Speaker 1: have to really begin to re learn our relationship to 606 00:37:23,719 --> 00:37:27,560 Speaker 1: emotion and to feeling and to hold space for each other. 607 00:37:27,960 --> 00:37:30,920 Speaker 1: You know, I think that's something that's been really profound 608 00:37:30,960 --> 00:37:33,920 Speaker 1: for me. I joined a men's group, started a men's 609 00:37:33,920 --> 00:37:38,600 Speaker 1: group in two seventeen um, and we just spoke about 610 00:37:38,600 --> 00:37:41,319 Speaker 1: our feelings. And the first, the first few times we 611 00:37:41,400 --> 00:37:45,320 Speaker 1: did that, it was like weird. And but then he realized, like, Okay, 612 00:37:45,360 --> 00:37:51,160 Speaker 1: here is another man watching this other guy completely breakdown 613 00:37:51,200 --> 00:37:53,719 Speaker 1: in tears, and he's not going over to him. He's 614 00:37:53,719 --> 00:37:56,120 Speaker 1: not saying it's okay, it's all right, just cheer up. 615 00:37:56,719 --> 00:38:00,480 Speaker 1: He's just silent, and he's just holding space for another 616 00:38:00,520 --> 00:38:04,840 Speaker 1: man to feel these feelings. And UM, I have personally 617 00:38:05,040 --> 00:38:07,879 Speaker 1: very very grateful for experiences like that, And I think 618 00:38:07,920 --> 00:38:09,880 Speaker 1: there's a lot of deep work we need to do 619 00:38:09,960 --> 00:38:13,799 Speaker 1: as men, for sure, to to reclaim ourselves and to 620 00:38:13,880 --> 00:38:16,320 Speaker 1: reclaim our bodies and to honor the women in our life. 621 00:38:16,880 --> 00:38:20,960 Speaker 1: Mm hmm, thank you for saying that. Yeah, sometimes it 622 00:38:21,000 --> 00:38:24,280 Speaker 1: feels like, you know, and this might be really rooted 623 00:38:24,280 --> 00:38:27,920 Speaker 1: in my human experience, but sometimes it does feel like 624 00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:31,279 Speaker 1: as we're all diligently doing the work, we can still 625 00:38:31,400 --> 00:38:36,400 Speaker 1: UM only raise our collective consciousness as high as men's 626 00:38:36,440 --> 00:38:40,560 Speaker 1: healing will allow, you know. And I think women were 627 00:38:40,760 --> 00:38:43,520 Speaker 1: naturally for many of us. Even if even if we 628 00:38:43,600 --> 00:38:47,200 Speaker 1: don't you know, UM in this incarnation are not able 629 00:38:47,239 --> 00:38:51,080 Speaker 1: to become fully embodied and expressed. Our training is and 630 00:38:51,200 --> 00:38:56,440 Speaker 1: NURTURANCEUM our training is in at least some level of 631 00:38:56,480 --> 00:39:01,440 Speaker 1: transparency and openness. We are. We're even UM pretty enthusiastically 632 00:39:01,520 --> 00:39:05,160 Speaker 1: guided to start gossiping really young, constantly talking about shared 633 00:39:05,200 --> 00:39:09,600 Speaker 1: experience or opinions or thoughts or how we're experiencing ourselves. Um, 634 00:39:09,680 --> 00:39:11,520 Speaker 1: and that that is an extended to men there on 635 00:39:11,520 --> 00:39:14,440 Speaker 1: the complete other end of the spectrum, where it's like suppress, 636 00:39:15,160 --> 00:39:18,880 Speaker 1: suppress all the feelings all the time. Don't even be 637 00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:23,200 Speaker 1: extra happy when you feel happy, and definitely don't um, 638 00:39:23,480 --> 00:39:27,960 Speaker 1: don't express when you're feeling sad, discomfort, excuse me, disappointed 639 00:39:28,040 --> 00:39:31,879 Speaker 1: or shamed. How how does a man begin his relationship 640 00:39:31,960 --> 00:39:34,480 Speaker 1: of settling into his body like in a moment where 641 00:39:35,000 --> 00:39:39,560 Speaker 1: that sacred rage or that anger is coming up? How 642 00:39:39,560 --> 00:39:43,200 Speaker 1: how can someone begin to shift into that role of 643 00:39:43,239 --> 00:39:47,879 Speaker 1: observer and just being with themselves and that being enough 644 00:39:50,200 --> 00:39:54,759 Speaker 1: with tenderness. I don't know if there's any other way 645 00:39:54,920 --> 00:40:01,040 Speaker 1: like it's it's with tenderness. It's like that recognizing that 646 00:40:01,080 --> 00:40:04,280 Speaker 1: this is hard for all of us. We're all traumatized, 647 00:40:04,400 --> 00:40:08,160 Speaker 1: like we're all we're all in pain to some degree, 648 00:40:08,200 --> 00:40:09,919 Speaker 1: even if we don't know it, and if we don't 649 00:40:09,920 --> 00:40:11,520 Speaker 1: know what it means, we're in more pain that we 650 00:40:12,000 --> 00:40:15,520 Speaker 1: then we actually you are aware of and we have 651 00:40:15,600 --> 00:40:18,760 Speaker 1: to be gentle with ourselves. We have to be curious 652 00:40:18,760 --> 00:40:22,400 Speaker 1: with ourselves. We have to reach our for help. You know, 653 00:40:22,520 --> 00:40:26,719 Speaker 1: I think the combination of meditation and therapy for me 654 00:40:26,880 --> 00:40:30,440 Speaker 1: is being a game changer. It's genuinely changed my life 655 00:40:30,800 --> 00:40:34,400 Speaker 1: and in terms changed my relationships, you know. And I 656 00:40:34,440 --> 00:40:37,120 Speaker 1: couldn't have done that alone with meditation, and I couldn't 657 00:40:37,120 --> 00:40:40,640 Speaker 1: have done that alone just with with therapy. I think 658 00:40:40,880 --> 00:40:44,680 Speaker 1: friendship is also a mirror as well, you know, having 659 00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:47,720 Speaker 1: men around me that can speak about what they're feeling 660 00:40:48,239 --> 00:40:52,000 Speaker 1: and they aren't afraid to hold me accountable to a 661 00:40:52,080 --> 00:40:55,360 Speaker 1: higher standard or a higher version of myself, that is 662 00:40:55,400 --> 00:41:03,520 Speaker 1: being tremendously helpful. And then also like recognizing that women 663 00:41:03,640 --> 00:41:07,840 Speaker 1: are such a what women are such wonderful teachers, like 664 00:41:07,920 --> 00:41:11,560 Speaker 1: they genuinely they genuinely are. And I look at my 665 00:41:11,640 --> 00:41:14,560 Speaker 1: mom and you know, I've got to love relationship with 666 00:41:14,560 --> 00:41:18,440 Speaker 1: my mom. Wonderful woman and the amazing woman that Over 667 00:41:18,680 --> 00:41:21,160 Speaker 1: the years, you realize how your parents have traumatized you 668 00:41:21,200 --> 00:41:26,479 Speaker 1: in different ways. But then you you remember how much 669 00:41:26,520 --> 00:41:31,359 Speaker 1: they had to hold right, they had to hold They 670 00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:35,080 Speaker 1: had to hold their sons, they had to hold their husbands, 671 00:41:35,160 --> 00:41:39,960 Speaker 1: they had to hold culture, they had to hold the patriarchy, 672 00:41:40,040 --> 00:41:41,960 Speaker 1: and on top of that, they had to you know, 673 00:41:42,800 --> 00:41:45,239 Speaker 1: look good and be skinny and you know, put on 674 00:41:45,360 --> 00:41:48,279 Speaker 1: makeup and do all of this, and if you can 675 00:41:48,320 --> 00:41:52,000 Speaker 1: reflect on that, you realize that there's just a natural 676 00:41:52,080 --> 00:41:55,920 Speaker 1: empathy that just grows, like genuinely, Like when I look 677 00:41:55,920 --> 00:41:59,120 Speaker 1: at my mom now, I'm just like, wow, Mom, Like 678 00:41:59,800 --> 00:42:02,680 Speaker 1: you just did the best that you could. That holy 679 00:42:02,760 --> 00:42:07,759 Speaker 1: Holy Moly held so much right. And I think just 680 00:42:07,840 --> 00:42:13,280 Speaker 1: remembering our humanity and moments like that and remembering um 681 00:42:13,480 --> 00:42:18,440 Speaker 1: suffering of another naturally softens you. It naturally softens you. 682 00:42:20,320 --> 00:42:23,879 Speaker 1: That was beautiful. Yeah, I think all of us needed 683 00:42:23,920 --> 00:42:27,400 Speaker 1: to hear that as that reminder, you know, especially especially 684 00:42:27,400 --> 00:42:30,399 Speaker 1: those of us that connected to the lifelong path of 685 00:42:30,440 --> 00:42:33,759 Speaker 1: doing the work, because I do think that sometimes we 686 00:42:33,840 --> 00:42:39,359 Speaker 1: get a little bit, uh, we're really feeling ourselves right 687 00:42:39,400 --> 00:42:41,600 Speaker 1: as we're healing, and we get that, we get this 688 00:42:41,680 --> 00:42:43,839 Speaker 1: kind of momentum going and it's just like, yeah, look 689 00:42:43,880 --> 00:42:47,279 Speaker 1: at me, like slaying these dragons, meeting these monsters. I'm 690 00:42:47,320 --> 00:42:51,560 Speaker 1: so strong, I'm healing my lineage, breaking through ancestral trauma. 691 00:42:51,640 --> 00:42:53,879 Speaker 1: And you know, it's like we're giving ourselves these pat 692 00:42:53,920 --> 00:42:56,640 Speaker 1: on the backs, which we're deserving of because the work 693 00:42:57,000 --> 00:42:59,920 Speaker 1: is work, um, and it takes, it takes it a man. 694 00:43:00,000 --> 00:43:05,040 Speaker 1: It's amount of courage to face yourself. But our collective 695 00:43:05,040 --> 00:43:08,400 Speaker 1: consciousness has risen to a point where it's also allowed 696 00:43:08,640 --> 00:43:11,160 Speaker 1: us space to do that in a way that other 697 00:43:11,200 --> 00:43:15,640 Speaker 1: generations didn't have. And so extending that grace that you 698 00:43:15,760 --> 00:43:20,439 Speaker 1: just really beautifully shared to your mother, and and specifically 699 00:43:20,440 --> 00:43:23,919 Speaker 1: in recognizing the fact that there were so many facets 700 00:43:24,880 --> 00:43:29,279 Speaker 1: of things that she had to hold, and there were 701 00:43:29,400 --> 00:43:35,680 Speaker 1: so many, um potentially layers of against us that she 702 00:43:35,840 --> 00:43:38,960 Speaker 1: held for herself from all the views of society on 703 00:43:39,120 --> 00:43:42,279 Speaker 1: top of her own spiritual curriculum. And so to acknowledge 704 00:43:42,320 --> 00:43:44,799 Speaker 1: that it is so powerful, and I think so many 705 00:43:44,840 --> 00:43:48,560 Speaker 1: of us, you know, it's it's a constant ebiflow of 706 00:43:48,640 --> 00:43:53,080 Speaker 1: making peace with that, you know, because yeah, so beautifully 707 00:43:53,120 --> 00:43:55,560 Speaker 1: said Debby, And you know this is you talked about 708 00:43:55,560 --> 00:43:58,719 Speaker 1: collective consciousness. And I think the way it is going 709 00:43:58,800 --> 00:44:02,560 Speaker 1: to continue to rise is to recognize that each of 710 00:44:02,680 --> 00:44:07,879 Speaker 1: us is a byproduct of causes and conditions like we 711 00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:11,279 Speaker 1: we really are. Like if if you know, if I 712 00:44:11,320 --> 00:44:15,640 Speaker 1: was born in in in l A, I would have 713 00:44:15,680 --> 00:44:18,440 Speaker 1: had a very different experience by the nature of how 714 00:44:18,520 --> 00:44:22,320 Speaker 1: I look compared to if I was born in Sri Lanka. 715 00:44:23,360 --> 00:44:26,279 Speaker 1: My parents if they weren't immigrants, would have a very 716 00:44:26,400 --> 00:44:31,120 Speaker 1: different effect on me if they stayed in Sri Lanka, right, 717 00:44:31,160 --> 00:44:34,560 Speaker 1: and each of us we can't we can't always choose 718 00:44:34,880 --> 00:44:38,400 Speaker 1: the conditions that were raised in or that we experience. 719 00:44:38,520 --> 00:44:40,960 Speaker 1: And if we can see that this is my work. 720 00:44:41,000 --> 00:44:43,520 Speaker 1: I know with the people that I disagree with, the 721 00:44:43,520 --> 00:44:47,840 Speaker 1: people that have the complete opposite opinion about me on 722 00:44:48,080 --> 00:44:51,200 Speaker 1: any level, if I can understand, like they are not 723 00:44:51,239 --> 00:44:54,799 Speaker 1: a bad person, they are just a byproduct of the 724 00:44:54,920 --> 00:44:59,320 Speaker 1: causes and conditions that they experienced, there's healing in that moment. 725 00:44:59,400 --> 00:45:04,240 Speaker 1: There's the space for understanding. And I genuinely think only 726 00:45:04,360 --> 00:45:09,759 Speaker 1: understanding will heal our society. It's understanding and empathy. And 727 00:45:09,800 --> 00:45:12,840 Speaker 1: if I can sit in front of someone and feel 728 00:45:12,880 --> 00:45:17,600 Speaker 1: their pain and here they're suffering and they have the 729 00:45:17,640 --> 00:45:20,560 Speaker 1: complete different opinion to me, like there is a moment 730 00:45:20,600 --> 00:45:23,920 Speaker 1: there of connection because at that moment, me and this 731 00:45:24,000 --> 00:45:27,680 Speaker 1: person are bondering, bonding under the fact that we both suffer, 732 00:45:28,120 --> 00:45:31,239 Speaker 1: and there is common ground right at that moment and 733 00:45:31,280 --> 00:45:36,120 Speaker 1: with common ground like we heal mm hmm mm hmm. 734 00:45:36,960 --> 00:45:42,240 Speaker 1: That's so good. There was so much there that was Yeah, 735 00:45:42,640 --> 00:45:44,640 Speaker 1: let's play this back a few times, everyone and take 736 00:45:44,640 --> 00:45:47,440 Speaker 1: a few notes. Um, specifically, when you said each of 737 00:45:47,560 --> 00:45:54,239 Speaker 1: us is a product of causes and conditions. Wow, yeah, 738 00:45:54,280 --> 00:45:57,680 Speaker 1: I'm a I'm a journal to that. Later, Um, could 739 00:45:57,719 --> 00:46:01,240 Speaker 1: you tell me a little bit more about your book 740 00:46:01,480 --> 00:46:05,399 Speaker 1: Still Together that is in stores available for preorder. Now, 741 00:46:05,960 --> 00:46:09,840 Speaker 1: you know, speaking to this connection specifically, you're exploring ways 742 00:46:09,880 --> 00:46:13,080 Speaker 1: in this book that we feel detachment from our lives, 743 00:46:13,920 --> 00:46:16,480 Speaker 1: our goals, and our friendships and how to begin to 744 00:46:16,520 --> 00:46:20,800 Speaker 1: reclaim ourselves through human connection. Why is the human connection 745 00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:23,799 Speaker 1: such a necessary tool and how do you explore that 746 00:46:23,840 --> 00:46:27,080 Speaker 1: in this book? Well, in my in my research, I 747 00:46:27,160 --> 00:46:30,920 Speaker 1: really explored Maslin's hierarchy of needs, right. I looked at 748 00:46:30,960 --> 00:46:36,080 Speaker 1: that and you know, friendships and social circles, it's it's 749 00:46:36,160 --> 00:46:39,160 Speaker 1: up near the top of the pyramid. And I make 750 00:46:39,200 --> 00:46:42,399 Speaker 1: a case that I think this is as important as 751 00:46:42,440 --> 00:46:47,160 Speaker 1: food and water. And the reason I say that is because, Okay, 752 00:46:47,239 --> 00:46:50,640 Speaker 1: we might not die if we don't see a friend 753 00:46:50,800 --> 00:46:54,320 Speaker 1: for a month's time, you know, but I think we 754 00:46:54,040 --> 00:46:57,839 Speaker 1: have we suffer psychologically in that in that moment the 755 00:46:57,880 --> 00:47:03,000 Speaker 1: ability to as as as infants, to have a parent 756 00:47:03,120 --> 00:47:07,799 Speaker 1: that mirrors your emotions and your needs really changes the 757 00:47:07,840 --> 00:47:11,279 Speaker 1: course of your life. Right, that's connection right there. And 758 00:47:11,760 --> 00:47:14,640 Speaker 1: as adults, the ability to have friends that do the 759 00:47:14,680 --> 00:47:17,520 Speaker 1: exact same thing, or a support system and do the 760 00:47:17,560 --> 00:47:21,040 Speaker 1: exact same thing can heal you. And I'm not talking 761 00:47:21,080 --> 00:47:23,080 Speaker 1: about the kind of friendship where everyone is giving you 762 00:47:23,120 --> 00:47:25,239 Speaker 1: their opinion of how you should do this and how 763 00:47:25,239 --> 00:47:28,040 Speaker 1: you should do that. We need those friends too, But 764 00:47:28,160 --> 00:47:31,800 Speaker 1: I think human connection is the foundation to our happiness. 765 00:47:32,560 --> 00:47:37,560 Speaker 1: I don't think it's possible to be truly happy without that, right, 766 00:47:37,680 --> 00:47:44,719 Speaker 1: And so many connections, I'll speak for myself, um, aren't authentic. 767 00:47:45,360 --> 00:47:50,560 Speaker 1: You know that they're sometimes relationships or connections of convenience. Um, 768 00:47:50,600 --> 00:47:52,319 Speaker 1: And that's okay too. Like a lot of my high 769 00:47:52,360 --> 00:47:54,960 Speaker 1: school friends, we catch up every now and again, and 770 00:47:55,200 --> 00:47:57,920 Speaker 1: it's fun and it's easy and it's simple. But I 771 00:47:57,920 --> 00:48:01,080 Speaker 1: don't have those heart to heart moments with them, right, 772 00:48:01,400 --> 00:48:05,439 Speaker 1: I don't have those experiences where I am genuinely getting 773 00:48:05,480 --> 00:48:09,640 Speaker 1: a sense of this person's heart at that moment. And 774 00:48:09,680 --> 00:48:12,560 Speaker 1: I think that's a as a byproduct of social conditioning, 775 00:48:12,719 --> 00:48:17,000 Speaker 1: Like we we aren't trained to do that. We don't 776 00:48:17,040 --> 00:48:20,759 Speaker 1: slow our mind enough to be present with someone and 777 00:48:20,840 --> 00:48:25,440 Speaker 1: so um, yeah, I mean this. This book leverages mindfulness philosophy, 778 00:48:25,480 --> 00:48:31,399 Speaker 1: Buddhist psychology. It looks at some research around connection and 779 00:48:32,000 --> 00:48:35,160 Speaker 1: you know, our attachments to things like money, and our 780 00:48:35,200 --> 00:48:39,880 Speaker 1: attachments to our mobile phone and technology at large. And 781 00:48:39,960 --> 00:48:43,359 Speaker 1: it doesn't actually tell you don't do this, because I 782 00:48:43,400 --> 00:48:47,239 Speaker 1: don't believe in binaries like that. It's more an invitation 783 00:48:47,320 --> 00:48:49,800 Speaker 1: to consider the impact this is having in your life. 784 00:48:49,800 --> 00:48:52,319 Speaker 1: And if it's having it's having no impact at all, 785 00:48:52,360 --> 00:48:55,600 Speaker 1: then that's great, then life is good for you. Um, 786 00:48:56,480 --> 00:48:58,920 Speaker 1: keep doing what you're doing. But it's also an invitation 787 00:48:59,040 --> 00:49:02,239 Speaker 1: to big curious if they if you ever feel like 788 00:49:02,239 --> 00:49:05,799 Speaker 1: there's something missing in your life, and that's an invitation 789 00:49:05,880 --> 00:49:11,200 Speaker 1: to explore what connection means to you. So something just 790 00:49:11,320 --> 00:49:14,040 Speaker 1: came up for me, actually, and what you said that 791 00:49:14,040 --> 00:49:18,280 Speaker 1: that is really beautiful to savor. Um, what I'm hearing 792 00:49:18,360 --> 00:49:21,279 Speaker 1: and what you're saying about connection is also it's so 793 00:49:21,480 --> 00:49:25,799 Speaker 1: necessary for us because that is how we also experience ourselves. 794 00:49:25,880 --> 00:49:30,440 Speaker 1: We can learn who we are and make the pivots 795 00:49:30,600 --> 00:49:34,279 Speaker 1: or make the refinements really based on that mirroring and 796 00:49:34,320 --> 00:49:38,280 Speaker 1: that reflection from another person. And what's what's really beautiful 797 00:49:38,320 --> 00:49:41,719 Speaker 1: about that to me is there's a book called Conversations 798 00:49:41,719 --> 00:49:44,560 Speaker 1: with God of referenced on the show I Love Love 799 00:49:44,600 --> 00:49:47,520 Speaker 1: that book. But something that really struck me that I 800 00:49:48,160 --> 00:49:50,360 Speaker 1: had always thought my whole life but I didn't have 801 00:49:50,440 --> 00:49:54,080 Speaker 1: language for was in the book. Um. The author is 802 00:49:54,160 --> 00:49:56,800 Speaker 1: channeling with God and asks, you know, why why do 803 00:49:56,920 --> 00:49:59,800 Speaker 1: we exist? Why did why did you even create human beings? 804 00:50:00,360 --> 00:50:03,440 Speaker 1: And in the book, God responds by saying, Um, I 805 00:50:03,600 --> 00:50:09,400 Speaker 1: longed to experience myself and what I'm hearing in even 806 00:50:09,480 --> 00:50:13,000 Speaker 1: the beauty, and I don't even think I had. You know, 807 00:50:13,040 --> 00:50:16,800 Speaker 1: I've always been aware of the beautiful, reflective, mirrored nature 808 00:50:17,080 --> 00:50:22,239 Speaker 1: of relationship. But I think this really just anchored for 809 00:50:22,400 --> 00:50:28,440 Speaker 1: me the deeper understanding of how necessary connection and community 810 00:50:28,600 --> 00:50:31,640 Speaker 1: is because it is also what allows us to experience 811 00:50:31,680 --> 00:50:36,640 Speaker 1: our own selves. Yeah. You know, the Buddha has um 812 00:50:37,560 --> 00:50:40,400 Speaker 1: three jewels that he talks about that we take refuge in, 813 00:50:41,080 --> 00:50:43,960 Speaker 1: and you know this is sometimes in in Asian countries 814 00:50:44,040 --> 00:50:47,440 Speaker 1: represented by an umbrella, because we take refuge under an 815 00:50:47,480 --> 00:50:49,880 Speaker 1: umbrella when it's raining. I've got a tattoo of my 816 00:50:49,960 --> 00:50:53,040 Speaker 1: arm which has it like an umbrella, and we take 817 00:50:53,200 --> 00:50:57,279 Speaker 1: refuge in three things. The Buddha Damasanga and that that 818 00:50:57,480 --> 00:51:03,440 Speaker 1: essentially represents the is someone's ability to awaken, just like 819 00:51:03,480 --> 00:51:08,320 Speaker 1: the Buddha did, someone's ability to overcome suffering. The Dama 820 00:51:08,520 --> 00:51:12,120 Speaker 1: represents the way things are like so a set of 821 00:51:12,160 --> 00:51:15,239 Speaker 1: teachings that guide us throughout our life. And the sun 822 00:51:15,280 --> 00:51:22,239 Speaker 1: girl represents the community and just this teaching on a refuge, 823 00:51:22,400 --> 00:51:25,160 Speaker 1: like we can take refuge in our friends and our 824 00:51:25,200 --> 00:51:28,480 Speaker 1: community when times are hard. We can take refuge in 825 00:51:28,719 --> 00:51:33,640 Speaker 1: God or spirituality or consciousness or any belief system when 826 00:51:33,640 --> 00:51:36,640 Speaker 1: times are hard, and we can take refuge in the 827 00:51:36,800 --> 00:51:40,319 Speaker 1: understanding that we will one day overcome. That has just 828 00:51:40,360 --> 00:51:43,959 Speaker 1: been so profound and I have, for the longest time 829 00:51:44,080 --> 00:51:48,240 Speaker 1: have been teaching that meditation isn't going to save your life. 830 00:51:49,080 --> 00:51:53,160 Speaker 1: Meditation won't fix all of your problems. It's a combination 831 00:51:53,200 --> 00:51:57,200 Speaker 1: of things. And a good diet is one. Having friends 832 00:51:57,200 --> 00:52:00,279 Speaker 1: in the community is another one, you know, and having 833 00:52:00,320 --> 00:52:02,880 Speaker 1: a therapist is also another one. Like all of these 834 00:52:03,320 --> 00:52:06,560 Speaker 1: these things are so vital, but we don't live in 835 00:52:06,600 --> 00:52:09,640 Speaker 1: a vacuum and we have to constantly interact with people, 836 00:52:10,120 --> 00:52:13,960 Speaker 1: and so having a community and having a suner or 837 00:52:14,080 --> 00:52:18,680 Speaker 1: friends that you trust um is vital for our spiritual 838 00:52:18,719 --> 00:52:25,200 Speaker 1: well being. Mm hmm. I received. Yeah, yes, well, so 839 00:52:25,239 --> 00:52:26,640 Speaker 1: I take back what I said at the top of 840 00:52:26,680 --> 00:52:29,799 Speaker 1: this interview about wanting to now be isolated all the time, 841 00:52:29,880 --> 00:52:33,200 Speaker 1: even in the new normal. I think, really, it's it's 842 00:52:33,239 --> 00:52:38,360 Speaker 1: the shift of I'm only available for the deepest relationships, 843 00:52:39,840 --> 00:52:44,320 Speaker 1: that's all I'm available for. Actually, yeah, no, it's it's 844 00:52:44,760 --> 00:52:47,640 Speaker 1: it's profound and you know, I consider you like we have. 845 00:52:47,719 --> 00:52:51,080 Speaker 1: This saying in Buddhism is called kalian a kalian amita 846 00:52:51,160 --> 00:52:55,200 Speaker 1: mean spiritual friend. Um. A spiritual friend is someone that 847 00:52:55,239 --> 00:52:58,239 Speaker 1: you can have conversations like we always tend to have 848 00:52:58,320 --> 00:53:00,640 Speaker 1: when way together. And I can see to you that 849 00:53:00,800 --> 00:53:03,480 Speaker 1: and there's something really healing from me and knowing that 850 00:53:03,920 --> 00:53:06,120 Speaker 1: I have a friend like you that can explore these 851 00:53:06,120 --> 00:53:09,520 Speaker 1: topics with you, know that we can we can geek 852 00:53:09,560 --> 00:53:12,680 Speaker 1: out on this house and ours and ours and not 853 00:53:12,800 --> 00:53:16,600 Speaker 1: have an answer, but just debate them, debate them, and 854 00:53:16,600 --> 00:53:21,920 Speaker 1: and there's something really wonderful about that because we we 855 00:53:22,080 --> 00:53:26,080 Speaker 1: sacrifice our spiritual well being in one life. And spirituality 856 00:53:26,120 --> 00:53:28,360 Speaker 1: can mean anything to you, like it doesn't really, I 857 00:53:28,360 --> 00:53:30,880 Speaker 1: don't really care what it means to you, But we 858 00:53:31,000 --> 00:53:34,359 Speaker 1: sacrifice that because we disconnect from the bodies and our 859 00:53:34,360 --> 00:53:36,600 Speaker 1: spirit is in the body, that spirit isn't in the mind. 860 00:53:38,120 --> 00:53:40,040 Speaker 1: Thank you, Thank you so much for that, and I 861 00:53:40,080 --> 00:53:43,240 Speaker 1: reflect that right back to you. We definitely our sole family. 862 00:53:43,920 --> 00:53:46,400 Speaker 1: And you know, you know what's so amazing Minos in 863 00:53:46,440 --> 00:53:49,680 Speaker 1: hearing you say that, I'll just this is the craving 864 00:53:49,719 --> 00:53:51,520 Speaker 1: I have in my life right now for the people 865 00:53:51,520 --> 00:53:57,440 Speaker 1: in my life is I just want to be like 866 00:53:57,560 --> 00:54:01,800 Speaker 1: with people like you someplace and we're just quiet together 867 00:54:02,280 --> 00:54:06,400 Speaker 1: to write like, I just I want to experience the 868 00:54:06,480 --> 00:54:10,000 Speaker 1: people that I feel connected to in ways that are 869 00:54:10,239 --> 00:54:14,160 Speaker 1: so far removed from the societal constructs of how we 870 00:54:14,239 --> 00:54:18,000 Speaker 1: are meant to look at friendship or relationship, you know, like, 871 00:54:18,200 --> 00:54:23,640 Speaker 1: can we just go sit somewhere and be quiet at 872 00:54:23,680 --> 00:54:26,600 Speaker 1: the same time and that be enough and and find 873 00:54:26,680 --> 00:54:29,560 Speaker 1: other ways to communicate with one another? You know what, 874 00:54:29,560 --> 00:54:32,320 Speaker 1: what are you sensing in your body? What are you feeling? 875 00:54:32,360 --> 00:54:37,360 Speaker 1: Can we just appreciate the what is in the moment 876 00:54:37,440 --> 00:54:41,399 Speaker 1: and allow nature and all the outside influences to kind 877 00:54:41,400 --> 00:54:44,680 Speaker 1: of inform the experience, Like I am craving that, I'm 878 00:54:44,719 --> 00:54:51,440 Speaker 1: craving silence with people I care for. I'm craving, Um, 879 00:54:51,520 --> 00:54:54,279 Speaker 1: I'm just craving relating to people in a way that 880 00:54:54,280 --> 00:54:59,120 Speaker 1: are so fully deprogrammed from the lens that was thrust 881 00:54:59,239 --> 00:55:02,319 Speaker 1: upon each of us being on earth and being in 882 00:55:02,360 --> 00:55:05,480 Speaker 1: a society. Watch out, your DEVI and I are going 883 00:55:05,520 --> 00:55:07,640 Speaker 1: to be running in a retreat very soon. The sounds 884 00:55:07,680 --> 00:55:13,239 Speaker 1: like a retreat idea, you know. I think for me, 885 00:55:13,400 --> 00:55:15,719 Speaker 1: it's not even that they have d programmed. It's that 886 00:55:15,800 --> 00:55:20,719 Speaker 1: they have a desire to explore, you know, because I 887 00:55:20,760 --> 00:55:25,840 Speaker 1: definitely don't think I've awakened or I've enlightened. I definitely 888 00:55:25,840 --> 00:55:28,160 Speaker 1: have the desire to do that, you know for sure. 889 00:55:28,239 --> 00:55:31,799 Speaker 1: And I think that desire is a healthy desire and 890 00:55:32,400 --> 00:55:35,919 Speaker 1: having friends along the path makes it joyful, right because 891 00:55:35,920 --> 00:55:39,040 Speaker 1: otherwise it's like real morbid sometimes sitting with your mind 892 00:55:39,239 --> 00:55:42,239 Speaker 1: and noticing up all your trauma. I'm like, this is 893 00:55:42,280 --> 00:55:46,920 Speaker 1: like boring, like but then you have a group of 894 00:55:46,960 --> 00:55:49,680 Speaker 1: friends around you that that you can joke about it 895 00:55:49,680 --> 00:55:51,760 Speaker 1: with and you can you can support you on the path. 896 00:55:52,400 --> 00:55:55,440 Speaker 1: And you know, a yoga studio can act like this, 897 00:55:55,560 --> 00:55:57,840 Speaker 1: and meditation studio can be that, an act can be 898 00:55:57,920 --> 00:56:01,600 Speaker 1: like that, whatever it is. For whoever's listening to this, UM, 899 00:56:01,640 --> 00:56:04,200 Speaker 1: I invite you to find your people. Yeah, just find 900 00:56:04,200 --> 00:56:08,000 Speaker 1: your people and then hold them tight. M I love that. 901 00:56:08,200 --> 00:56:11,759 Speaker 1: Find your tribe and also don't have any attachment to 902 00:56:11,840 --> 00:56:14,840 Speaker 1: what that's supposed to look like, you know, like, really 903 00:56:14,880 --> 00:56:17,480 Speaker 1: be open to the possibilities of who could show up 904 00:56:17,520 --> 00:56:21,120 Speaker 1: in your life and whatever shape or form, and finding 905 00:56:21,120 --> 00:56:23,920 Speaker 1: the ways that they can be. Um, you know, the 906 00:56:24,360 --> 00:56:27,680 Speaker 1: synchronousities within which you guys were connected, and finding the 907 00:56:27,719 --> 00:56:30,680 Speaker 1: beauty in it. But Nose, thank you for coming on 908 00:56:30,719 --> 00:56:34,640 Speaker 1: the show. I am so grateful for your time always. 909 00:56:34,760 --> 00:56:36,600 Speaker 1: I love I love chatting to you. We need to 910 00:56:36,600 --> 00:56:39,080 Speaker 1: do this a lot more way more. Let's go be 911 00:56:39,200 --> 00:56:42,560 Speaker 1: quiet together. Your books still together, everyone, make sure you 912 00:56:42,600 --> 00:56:45,320 Speaker 1: grab that copy. And of course, um, how can everyone 913 00:56:45,360 --> 00:56:48,720 Speaker 1: find you? How can they connect? Yeah? They can find 914 00:56:48,719 --> 00:56:51,480 Speaker 1: me on open like I teach on their teach life classes, 915 00:56:51,520 --> 00:56:54,480 Speaker 1: meditation classes. They can find me on the Instagram. They 916 00:56:54,520 --> 00:56:57,200 Speaker 1: can find me on my website. I'm really bad at 917 00:56:57,200 --> 00:57:03,839 Speaker 1: selling myself if you haven't picked that up. But if 918 00:57:04,040 --> 00:57:06,200 Speaker 1: if whatever else said speaks to you, then I'm sure 919 00:57:06,239 --> 00:57:09,520 Speaker 1: you'll find a way to to find me. Oh I 920 00:57:09,640 --> 00:57:12,640 Speaker 1: love that. I love that. Yeah, follow him on Instagram. 921 00:57:12,680 --> 00:57:16,400 Speaker 1: He also just did this really beautiful piece for Vogue magazine, 922 00:57:16,440 --> 00:57:20,120 Speaker 1: So I really highly suggest everyone go check that out. 923 00:57:24,240 --> 00:57:26,480 Speaker 1: At the end of every show, I love to ask 924 00:57:26,680 --> 00:57:29,680 Speaker 1: the guests to provide a little soul work for the listeners, 925 00:57:29,800 --> 00:57:35,160 Speaker 1: and so that can be either savored, thought journalinge, prompt, 926 00:57:35,680 --> 00:57:39,560 Speaker 1: a quote that you love, but something that for those 927 00:57:39,600 --> 00:57:42,720 Speaker 1: that feel called um, something that they can take away 928 00:57:42,800 --> 00:57:48,320 Speaker 1: and spend some time with after this show ends. Being 929 00:57:48,440 --> 00:57:56,160 Speaker 1: present doesn't mean feeling good mm hmm. And so that 930 00:57:56,320 --> 00:57:59,240 Speaker 1: is more an invitation to consider when you are deeply 931 00:57:59,320 --> 00:58:02,600 Speaker 1: present and it doesn't start to feel good, can you 932 00:58:02,680 --> 00:58:12,280 Speaker 1: be okay with that? Wow? Mic drop wow that oh wow, Yeah, 933 00:58:12,360 --> 00:58:16,360 Speaker 1: the way you phrase that love it. I will be 934 00:58:16,400 --> 00:58:19,800 Speaker 1: spending time with that as well. Minos. I hope to 935 00:58:19,840 --> 00:58:21,680 Speaker 1: see you soon. Thank you for coming to the show. 936 00:58:22,240 --> 00:58:25,360 Speaker 1: Thank yeah. I love all the things that you do. 937 00:58:26,600 --> 00:58:30,800 Speaker 1: Thank you, sister. I'll see you very very soon. Hey. 938 00:58:30,800 --> 00:58:34,560 Speaker 1: Find me on social Let's connect at Debbie Brown. That's 939 00:58:34,640 --> 00:58:37,800 Speaker 1: Twitter and Instagram, or go to my website Debbie Brown 940 00:58:38,200 --> 00:58:40,720 Speaker 1: dot com. And if you're listening to the show on 941 00:58:40,760 --> 00:58:46,480 Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts, please please please don't forget to rate, review, 942 00:58:47,080 --> 00:58:51,600 Speaker 1: and subscribe and send this episode to a friend. Dropping 943 00:58:51,680 --> 00:58:53,840 Speaker 1: Jims is the production of I Heart Radio and the 944 00:58:53,920 --> 00:58:58,080 Speaker 1: Black Effect Network. It's produced by Triple and Me Debbie Brown. 945 00:58:58,600 --> 00:59:01,080 Speaker 1: For more podcasts from My Heart Radio, visit the I 946 00:59:01,200 --> 00:59:04,880 Speaker 1: heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to 947 00:59:04,920 --> 00:59:05,760 Speaker 1: your favorite shows.