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Speaker 1: Two teas in a pod which Teddy Mellencamp and camera judge.

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Speaker 2: Hi, guys, welcome to another episode of The twat Seat,

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Speaker 2: and I am very excited to have a very special

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Speaker 2: guest today, Katie Thurston. Katie was originally on the Bachelor

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Speaker 2: and then she became the Bachelorette. The reason that I

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Speaker 2: wanted to have her aunt today not only did I

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Speaker 2: love watching her on both of those shows, is she

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Speaker 2: also is struggling with cancer. She has breast cancer I

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Speaker 2: think stage four, and so I just wanted to talk

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Speaker 2: to her about all the things. I mean, I know

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Speaker 2: at some point she wanted to start a family. I

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Speaker 2: know she recently got engaged and married since being diagnosed.

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Speaker 2: So let's dig into it. Oh yeah, that's the name

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Speaker 2: of the pod that you're on right now.

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Speaker 3: So what did you just call me?

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Speaker 2: Can you guess who's on? If you watch something other

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Speaker 2: than the Real Housewives, then you've probably already recognized this voice.

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Speaker 2: But it's I'm having somebody on because they've really touched

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Speaker 2: my heart and it's taught me a lot, and she's

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Speaker 2: taught me a lot, and so I wanted to come

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Speaker 2: on and have this conversation and there's no better person

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Speaker 2: than I would want to have on to have this

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Speaker 2: conversation than Katie Thurston.

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Speaker 3: Hi, I'm from The Bachelor, the Bachelorette, and we have cancer.

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Speaker 3: That's my intro. That's how you become a TWI. I

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Speaker 3: already teared.

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Speaker 2: Up when I never saw you.

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Speaker 3: I like, can't make eye contact with you for too long,

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Speaker 3: I will just start crying.

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Speaker 2: Oh my gosh. So I'm going to go into this

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Speaker 2: interview like we know nothing.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's fine.

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Speaker 2: And then any questions you have back for me, feel

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Speaker 2: free to ask. I'm sure I'll chime in whether I

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Speaker 2: should have known. It's fine. And as I told her,

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Speaker 2: I was like, listen there sometimes during the interview that

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Speaker 2: I may pause or get a little confused. And when

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Speaker 2: you said same, I just wanted.

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Speaker 3: To cry the most. I was like, I feel like

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Speaker 3: I'm talking to myself right now. Like it's unfortunately very relatable,

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Speaker 3: so like I will like stutter or like forget complete things,

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Speaker 3: and it's scary sometimes and given anext text is good

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Speaker 3: so far. I do a lot of voice memos to

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Speaker 3: like because that's the easiest thing. Yeah, thank you.

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Speaker 2: For saying that, because everyone's like Teddy, you and the

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Speaker 2: voice memos, and I'm like, I don't email anymore, just

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Speaker 2: text or voice memo. Yeah, so I'm like I can't

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Speaker 2: add that additional So first and foremost, congratulations, you're you're

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Speaker 2: a wife.

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Speaker 3: Now I'm a wife. I like the word husband, my husband, Yes,

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Speaker 3: the room or you trying to watch house?

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Speaker 2: Wow?

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Speaker 3: You know I'm busy nowadays.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, we wanted to have Katie on because there's

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Speaker 2: just so much that there is to learn, and I

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Speaker 2: think that you are Like everything that I've seen that

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Speaker 2: you've talked about has just been so inspiring for me.

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Speaker 2: I know we have different types of cancers, but do

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Speaker 2: you mind telling me a little bit about how you

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Speaker 2: came to find out where you are now?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it was obviously very unexpected. I think anyone who

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Speaker 3: has cancer is not expecting it. It was beginning of

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Speaker 3: the year and I was like, I should do like

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Speaker 3: my health checks. You know, I'm at the time engaged.

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Speaker 3: I want to maybe start a family, so let's just

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Speaker 3: you know, check on some things, including this lump that

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Speaker 3: I had. And I'd had a lump before and it

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Speaker 3: was a be nine sist and I kind of was

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Speaker 3: holding onto that thought and it was like oh, there's

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Speaker 3: no urgency. However, when I went in, they you know,

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Speaker 3: referred me to the specialist, which is normal. I don't

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Speaker 3: wait for like a few weeks for that. And then

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Speaker 3: it was that appointment. I was like, Oh, things are

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Speaker 3: more serious than I thought. You know, they're doing the

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Speaker 3: breast ultrasound and they're not saying anything, and you can

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Speaker 3: just hear her like take photo after photo after photo.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, she sees something, you know. I remember

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Speaker 3: with my first breast ultrasound in my twenties early twenties,

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Speaker 3: they told me right away, oh, it's nothing, you know.

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Speaker 3: I was kind of holding my breath for that, and

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Speaker 3: then when they didn't say anything, I just started like

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Speaker 3: crying because I just knew my gut. And they're like, well,

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Speaker 3: can you do a mammogram today. I'm like, I've never

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Speaker 3: even had a mammogram yet.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you're so young.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. And then I was like yeah, and so, you know,

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Speaker 3: I get the mammogram, and you know, the girl who

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Speaker 3: was helping me, she didn't know anything at the time.

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Speaker 3: I was like already panicing. She's like, oh, it's fine,

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Speaker 3: just a mamogram, and I was like, okay, but we're

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Speaker 3: looking for breast cancer. And then same thing when she

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Speaker 3: did the mammogram, she was kind of like her tone change.

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Speaker 3: She was more like soft and nurturing and kind of

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Speaker 3: like it's okay, you know, and I was like, shoot,

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Speaker 3: something's going.

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Speaker 2: I know. It's almost harder when you can start to

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Speaker 2: read how the other person's feeling.

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Speaker 4: You feel it.

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Speaker 2: You can feel it.

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Speaker 3: Oh, I'm a big energy person, which is also I

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Speaker 3: like cried almost like when I saw it, like oh

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Speaker 3: I can feel this energy. But yeah, so then then

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Speaker 3: they're like, okay, well we got to do a biopsy.

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Speaker 3: And so I was in is like really tough place

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Speaker 3: in terms of like I was about to turn into

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Speaker 3: my keys in La, Like my lease was up. I

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Speaker 3: was supposed to be traveling for two months like basically homeless,

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Speaker 3: you know, on the road with my now husband, and

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Speaker 3: then that's when I was like, what do we do?

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Speaker 3: My husband, who was supposed to be traveling, postponed two

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Speaker 3: months of his world tour to be with me, which

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Speaker 3: I didn't know at the time. That was like the

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Speaker 3: saving grace for me because I had no idea like

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Speaker 3: what I was about to get into. As you probably know,

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Speaker 3: the beginning is the hardest part of getting a diagnosis.

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Speaker 2: There's so much so how did they initially diagnose you?

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Speaker 2: And what exactly did they say?

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Speaker 3: Well, that's the even crazier part. When I was first

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Speaker 3: diagnosed as stage three triple positive, and that was in.

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Speaker 4: LA, and then.

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Speaker 3: So hormone positive, like it feeds off hormones, that's the

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Speaker 3: first like plus plus. And then there's something called her

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Speaker 3: too negative or her too positive, which is like a

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Speaker 3: her too protein. It's I had I thought breast cancer

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Speaker 3: was breast cancer. There's there's triple negative, triple positive, and

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Speaker 3: then hormone positive, her too negative. It's very complex, but

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Speaker 3: in the in the beginning, I was stage three triple positive.

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Speaker 3: And then I transferred care from LA to New York

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Speaker 3: where my husband lives, and now I live too, and

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Speaker 3: you kind of have to get rediagnosed, which was also

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Speaker 3: a weird, like saving grace because they're like, oh, you're

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Speaker 3: not stay straight, you're stage four, which shitty. But then

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Speaker 3: they're like, but also, you're not her too positive, you're

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Speaker 3: her too negative, which meant I didn't have to do chemotherapy,

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Speaker 3: but we didn't. I literally had my port installed. I

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Speaker 3: was one day away from starting chemo, and I remember

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Speaker 3: calling my own colleges because you get so many like

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Speaker 3: medications right before you start chemo, and I was like,

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Speaker 3: I don't understand these instructions, like what do I do?

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Speaker 3: And she's like, well, hold on, we're waiting. We're still

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Speaker 3: waiting to get confirmation on your her two status. And

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Speaker 3: she'd never told me. I think she didn't want to

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Speaker 3: give me like this like false hope of like, oh,

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Speaker 3: maybe I don't have to do it. I'm like, what, Like,

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Speaker 3: I literally just have my port installed, I have my

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Speaker 3: chemo bag packed, and you're telling me like tomorrow I

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Speaker 3: might not do chemo. And then that's ultimately when it

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Speaker 3: was happening, is they confirmed that I was misdiagnosed in LA.

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Speaker 3: It changed my whole treatment plan. Stage four is the

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Speaker 3: unfortunate part, but I mean at least they caught it.

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Speaker 3: Because you are treated differently when you're like stage three

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Speaker 3: versus stage four.

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Speaker 2: And what is the Because I'm stage four, but mine's

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Speaker 2: melanoma that metastaized to my brain and lungs, So what

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Speaker 2: is the difference in treatment when you are stage four?

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Speaker 3: So I think when you're stage three they want to

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Speaker 3: be really aggressive because it hasn't spread yet, so they

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Speaker 3: like throw everything at it. And it's very tough on

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Speaker 3: your body. For the type of cancer I have. It

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Speaker 3: was in my liver. But this treatment that just came

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Speaker 3: out maybe four years ago, it's an oral medication and

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Speaker 3: that's what I do as I take a pill every day,

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Speaker 3: three weeks on, one week off. I don't know like

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Speaker 3: the science behind it, but it's it is tough on

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Speaker 3: my body, but it's working. Like the tumor in my

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Speaker 3: liver has already shrunk. That's huge, thank you, thank you.

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Speaker 3: The breast has shrunk in size. My next scan is October,

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Speaker 3: and so my I mean, maybe I'm being a little

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Speaker 3: too optimistic, but I'm like, maybe I'll be no evidence

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Speaker 3: of disease, which is like the term they use for

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Speaker 3: people like us, you know, like technically with breast cancer,

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Speaker 3: I'll never be you know, cured at this time. It's

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Speaker 3: always I try to explain it, like there's always a

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Speaker 3: breast cancer cell circulating somewhere. It's how I like simplify

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Speaker 3: it and why I'm not, you know, ever going to

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Speaker 3: be like breast cancer free as of now. But I'm

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Speaker 3: very optimistic in like medical advancements and and hope, you know,

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Speaker 3: for a great future for people like you and me

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Speaker 3: in terms of what the future holds and what treatments

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Speaker 3: are available, and how does the pill make you feel?

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Speaker 3: Oh girl, well, the memory thing is like the one

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Speaker 3: thing I noticed right away. My vision's decreasing, my thinning.

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Speaker 3: I'm tired all the time, which is tough because they're like, oh, well,

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Speaker 3: to help with the you know, side effects work out.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, but I'm too tired to do anything super forgetful.

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Speaker 3: So when you said that, I was like, I felt

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Speaker 3: a little more calm in this interview because like God,

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Speaker 3: sometimes mid.

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Speaker 2: Sentence fumble around forget It's fine, I don't understand.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And like my like management is great because I'll

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Speaker 3: forget things and they they know, like now especially like

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Speaker 3: to hold my hand through things. And I think that's

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Speaker 3: the one thing we have in our space that we're

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Speaker 3: in is we have this like freedom to like move

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Speaker 3: at our pace, you know. And if I was like

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Speaker 3: at the bank, which is where I used to do

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Speaker 3: before Reality TV, I would have to go on disability

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Speaker 3: because there's no way I could work a normal job

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Speaker 3: working people's money and in private information and at a

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Speaker 3: pace that made sense.

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Speaker 2: That's something that just honestly made me feel so much gratitude,

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Speaker 2: because You're right, there is absolutely no even me trying

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Speaker 2: to like manage my kids' schedules the way that I

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Speaker 2: used to. I can't do it. Like I don't have

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Speaker 2: the like the cognitive ability to like be that set. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: it's like a schedule really stresses me out.

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Speaker 3: And it sucks because you don't have control the way

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Speaker 3: like we used to, you know. And I was just

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Speaker 3: in Washington, where I'm from, and I didn't even have

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Speaker 3: all my hotels planned. I was like booking hotels like

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Speaker 3: the day before because that's all I'm capable of doing.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, I can't believe this is exactly Or

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Speaker 2: like committing to things yeah yeah, And then I'm like,

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Speaker 2: once I commit to it, then I'm like, well I

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Speaker 2: have to do it.

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Speaker 3: No, No, you don't. You you use that cancer card

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Speaker 3: all the time you earned it. And that's the thing

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Speaker 3: I'm learning is like, like you have to be so

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Speaker 3: guilt free and taking care of yourself and putting yourself first,

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Speaker 3: and like I have like one hundred unread text messages

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Speaker 3: right now that I'm like, I don't know if I'll

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Speaker 3: ever so many of our friends and family listening. It's

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Speaker 3: not personal, it's just the cancer.

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Speaker 2: That's a cancer. We didn't mean it. We did mean it,

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Speaker 2: and so this pill, I feel like I've heard There's

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Speaker 2: been a couple of other people that I think I've

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Speaker 2: talked about it. So I'm on immune therapy. I did

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Speaker 2: radiation and then I did immune therapy. But nobody's told

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Speaker 2: me anything about this pill. I want. Is it solely

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Speaker 2: for breast cancer.

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Speaker 3: I believe it is just for breast cancer. Yeah, And

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Speaker 3: I think they're slowly like opening it up to more

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Speaker 3: people because that's what we want. We call it targeted therapy,

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Speaker 3: so like with chemo therapy, and why stage three typically

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Speaker 3: gets chemo therapy is they're just attacking it all as

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Speaker 3: fast and as hard as they can. But that also

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Speaker 3: attacks like your healthy cells. You know, with targeted therapy,

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Speaker 3: it's like I overall, for the most part, can feel normal.

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Speaker 3: My like white blood cell cancer messed up from time

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Speaker 3: to time, but it's it's just attacking the tumor. And

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Speaker 3: I think that's what we want going forward for all cancers.

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Speaker 3: Is like chemo is so tough on people, but if

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Speaker 3: we can you have a focus, targeted therapy on our

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Speaker 3: type of cancer and had it worked like that's like

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Speaker 3: the end game for us.

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Speaker 2: What was the moment that it actually really hit you, like.

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Speaker 3: Ough, oh cry ooh.

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Speaker 4: I think.

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Speaker 3: I was still like in the middle, like being diagnosed,

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Speaker 3: and I just had my mammogram and the medical system

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Speaker 3: is so messed up because sometimes you get access to

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Speaker 3: your chart before your doctor calls you. And so I'd

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Speaker 3: never had a mammogram and I I'm sending the screenshot

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Speaker 3: to my mom and there's what's called the Byrad's score,

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Speaker 3: and I didn't even know to like look that up

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Speaker 3: or know what that meant, and so I sent to

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Speaker 3: my mom, who then happened to send me like the

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Speaker 3: chart of like what a buy Rad score four meant

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Speaker 3: in five and I forget I think it was like

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Speaker 3: a four whatever. It was basically like ninety five percent.

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Speaker 3: Sure this is cancer. That's when it like hit me,

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Speaker 3: was like that like by Rad score and a doctor

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Speaker 3: hadn't talked to me about it yet. I think for

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Speaker 3: the longest time, I was like whoing on to like, Oh,

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Speaker 3: it's nothing, it's nothing, it's nothing. But then when I

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Speaker 3: saw like, oh, it's ninety five percent shirt, it's cancer.

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Speaker 3: I remember like packing up my LA apartment and just

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Speaker 3: being like I don't even know like where I'm going anymore,

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Speaker 3: you know, like I I my lease is up, I'm

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Speaker 3: supposed to be traveling. I'm supposed to be moved to

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Speaker 3: New York. My insurance Like, what the fuck am I

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Speaker 3: going to do right now?

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Speaker 2: Did you have life insurance?

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Speaker 3: I had life insurance?

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Speaker 2: Oh wow, now I definitely don't.

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Speaker 3: Yeah that guy sign us up. Guys. Yeah, I worked

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Speaker 3: at a bank, so I've done all these like things

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Speaker 3: like in my early twenties, thank god. But yeah, it

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Speaker 3: was just it didn't run in my family. I was

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Speaker 3: thirty four, and it just like came so unexpectedly.

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Speaker 2: When you were waiting for different results from scans or

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Speaker 2: things like that, like and you were feeling pretty did

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Speaker 2: what were some of the things that you did to

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Speaker 2: help make yourself feel better? Because like, there's some people

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Speaker 2: I talked to and they're like, I just laid I

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Speaker 2: laid I rest And some people are like, oh, I

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Speaker 2: felt totally fine. I was like, you know, I didn't

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Speaker 2: buy my friends over for the next day, and I'm like,

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Speaker 2: I feel like I'm on a roller coaster.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, at a van first of all van whatever you need.

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Speaker 3: But I think the thing that made me feel maybe

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Speaker 3: distracted was finding other people's stories, Like I before I

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Speaker 3: shared it publicly the eye breast cancer, I was on

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Speaker 3: TikTok like looking at hashes like breast cancer and finding

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Speaker 3: so many young women also with breast cancer and like

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Speaker 3: scrolling through their journeys and seeing what's going on. And

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Speaker 3: that was when I first realized like, oh, there's actually

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Speaker 3: a lot of young women with breast cancer, you know.

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Speaker 3: And so because these women were like my support unknowing

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Speaker 3: lead to them, I was like, I know, when the

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Speaker 3: time comes for me to go public, like that's gonna

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Speaker 3: be my next like chapter. Purpose is like sharing my

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Speaker 3: story in hopes of like helping other people as they

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Speaker 3: navigate like a really shitty time.

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Speaker 2: And what made you decide to go Because a lot

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Speaker 2: of people will ask me the same thing. They're like

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Speaker 2: why you know a lot of people don't say anything

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Speaker 2: because they don't want feedback from other people. Yeah, but

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Speaker 2: what made you decide to open up and share?

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Speaker 3: Well, I think for starters, I mean we're public people,

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Speaker 3: like we're public figures, I guess is what people would

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Speaker 3: say and it would be so disingenuine to like pretend

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Speaker 3: like I'm okay when I'm not. You know, when I

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Speaker 3: was diagnosed as valid, Like around Valentine's Day, all these

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Speaker 3: couples are posting like my Valentine, my husband, my boyfriend,

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Speaker 3: all these cute things they're doing, all this hearts and chocolate,

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Speaker 3: and I'm just sitting here like knowing I'm about to

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Speaker 3: get the call, which I got the call February thirteenth,

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Speaker 3: the official call, and I was like, I can't sit

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Speaker 3: here and post like, oh, I'm so happy on Valentine's Day. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I just had to be like so like raw and

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Speaker 3: true to like my life of what's going on and

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Speaker 3: share that. And it's been more healing than I expected

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Speaker 3: because it's the community. I mean, like even talking to you,

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Speaker 3: Like when you meet someone who genuinely understands what you're

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Speaker 3: going through, it's so validating, it's so healing, so nurturing

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Speaker 3: and protective. And that's like what I think keeps me

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Speaker 3: going is the community.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I would I would say the same, the community

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Speaker 2: knowing that you're not alone. And then also when you

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Speaker 2: talk to somebody that's also going through it, like you

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Speaker 2: just taught me something like I have been avoiding looking

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Speaker 2: at other people that have melanoma, and I've been avoiding

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Speaker 2: that because I don't want to start like self diagnosing.

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Speaker 2: But but there is a there is a comfort in

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Speaker 2: that as well, and so that's huge. And then but

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Speaker 2: the goodness is your tumors are shrinking to shrinking.

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Speaker 3: Medicine is working. So that's all we can hope for

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Speaker 3: with stage four is you know, as long as it

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Speaker 3: keeps working, we're good. If it doesn't, there's plan B

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Speaker 3: and C and D all lined up. And you know,

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Speaker 3: I've met women in my situation who are even ten

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Speaker 3: years into their metasatic breast cancer. And that's what I

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Speaker 3: hold on to and why I would encourage you to

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Speaker 3: like look for other people in your situation, because yes,

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Speaker 3: there are unfortunate stories that really have you spiraling, but

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Speaker 3: also there's so many good stories that like give you

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Speaker 3: hope and keep you motivated. Like that's going to be

349
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Speaker 3: mean ten years, I'm going to be celebrating ten years

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Speaker 3: of life from now.

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Speaker 2: And how has it been with your husband, because I

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00:17:27,720 --> 00:17:31,000
Speaker 2: mean you got married after you found out, And how

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Speaker 2: how have you guys been communicating? Because I know that

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Speaker 2: when I was hospitalized or when I've been going through

355
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Speaker 2: things like my friends, people I've dated, my ex husband.

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Speaker 2: He's not my ex husband, but my my what do

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Speaker 2: I call him? Guys?

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Speaker 3: He's a life partner, he's.

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Speaker 2: My my, my baby dad too that we're not together,

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Speaker 2: but you know, it is what it is. I would

361
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Speaker 2: I wasn't on my best behavior, like I'd be like snarky.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, no, it's very valid. I'm also in medically induced menopause,

363
00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:14,400
Speaker 3: and so with that comes a lot of emotional swings,

364
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Speaker 3: and I think in the beginning Jeff wasn't familiar with

365
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Speaker 3: that obviously, and we had to have very just like

366
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Speaker 3: transparent conversations of like, I might be a bit right now.

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Speaker 3: It's my emotions, it's my hormones, it's not you. And

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Speaker 3: we've had to figure out how to like navigate that

369
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Speaker 3: because there's moments where you're so angry, you're so angry

370
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Speaker 3: with your situation and you're so sad, you're so mad,

371
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Speaker 3: and then you know, it's easy to take it out

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Speaker 3: on the person closest to you, you know, And I

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Speaker 3: think we had to just really have honest conversations of

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Speaker 3: like how to handle that, and also from my perspective

375
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Speaker 3: of like letting go of the ego and apologizing because

376
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Speaker 3: I also can recognize, like, sure, I have cancer, it's

377
00:18:56,040 --> 00:18:58,080
Speaker 3: not an excuse to be mean to the people in

378
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Speaker 3: my life. Maybe the heat it I was feeling some

379
00:19:01,280 --> 00:19:03,600
Speaker 3: kind of way. But now that I'm calm and I

380
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:06,720
Speaker 3: have my hot Flash watch on and I'm feeling cool.

381
00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:09,040
Speaker 2: Hold on, what do.

382
00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:12,879
Speaker 3: You get hot flashes? Yes, girl, this is a life changer.

383
00:19:13,040 --> 00:19:13,920
Speaker 3: This is not sponsored.

384
00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:16,200
Speaker 2: I was like, this is this is not an ad,

385
00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:17,000
Speaker 2: but it should be.

386
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Speaker 3: Okay, Yeah, so it's a cooling watch because what a

387
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Speaker 3: hot flash is and I didn't realize it's it's a

388
00:19:23,160 --> 00:19:26,360
Speaker 3: brain thing, not like a body. It's not your body.

389
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Speaker 4: Yeah.

390
00:19:26,880 --> 00:19:28,640
Speaker 3: So originally they're like, well you can you can take

391
00:19:28,720 --> 00:19:31,919
Speaker 3: like an antidepressant, and I tried, but it's it's so

392
00:19:32,080 --> 00:19:35,440
Speaker 3: intense on your brain. And so what the watch does

393
00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:38,040
Speaker 3: is it sends a cooling flash to your wrist, which

394
00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:40,080
Speaker 3: then makes your brain go, oh, you're not hot, You're

395
00:19:40,080 --> 00:19:43,159
Speaker 3: actually cold, and therefore like kind of cancels out that

396
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Speaker 3: hot flash.

397
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Speaker 2: I need this.

398
00:19:46,160 --> 00:19:47,439
Speaker 3: I need this all of a sudden, do the link

399
00:19:47,440 --> 00:19:49,919
Speaker 3: because I swear by it, and like I said, they

400
00:19:49,920 --> 00:19:52,359
Speaker 3: won't sponsor me. I don't care. I will still promote

401
00:19:52,400 --> 00:19:54,880
Speaker 3: them for the rest of my life because it works

402
00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:55,200
Speaker 3: so well.

403
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Speaker 2: I'm on antidepressants right now, but sometimes I feel like

404
00:19:58,720 --> 00:20:02,520
Speaker 2: they just kind of like like I become a little

405
00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:05,840
Speaker 2: bit numb. Sure, yeah, and so I'm always looking for

406
00:20:05,920 --> 00:20:09,600
Speaker 2: ways to expand feeling better.

407
00:20:09,840 --> 00:20:10,159
Speaker 4: Yeah.

408
00:20:10,640 --> 00:20:13,359
Speaker 3: I get that because we take so many pills, and

409
00:20:13,400 --> 00:20:15,880
Speaker 3: so if you can find like a natural option out

410
00:20:15,920 --> 00:20:18,440
Speaker 3: of the twenty other pills you're taking, you're like, yeah,

411
00:20:18,440 --> 00:20:19,120
Speaker 3: that's a win.

412
00:20:19,520 --> 00:20:23,520
Speaker 2: The pills and finding things like did you change your

413
00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:26,040
Speaker 2: whole Like I mean, some people are so incredible, Like

414
00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:29,520
Speaker 2: they change their whole diet, they change everything. Meanwhile, like

415
00:20:29,560 --> 00:20:32,560
Speaker 2: I'm having a diet coke because like I need the energy.

416
00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:35,840
Speaker 2: So like, did you do like a full yes? And no.

417
00:20:36,200 --> 00:20:38,359
Speaker 3: I mean you definitely like reflect on your life choices

418
00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:40,320
Speaker 3: and you're like, where could I be better? Like I

419
00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:42,439
Speaker 3: knew I wasn't. And this is so dumb because they

420
00:20:42,440 --> 00:20:44,320
Speaker 3: teach you all the time. I definitely wasn't drinking my

421
00:20:44,359 --> 00:20:46,199
Speaker 3: eight glasses of water a day, you know, so now

422
00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:50,560
Speaker 3: I'm like, drink my water. You know. I was drinking

423
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Speaker 3: maybe more than I should as a little party girl,

424
00:20:54,119 --> 00:20:56,760
Speaker 3: but I still I still will have my glass of wine.

425
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Speaker 3: Like people will message me all the time be like

426
00:20:58,640 --> 00:21:00,959
Speaker 3: sugar this and wine, and you know it's like I

427
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:03,560
Speaker 3: get it, but like I also, I just want to

428
00:21:03,600 --> 00:21:06,439
Speaker 3: live my life, you know, don't critique me on my

429
00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:09,280
Speaker 3: life choices. Like I'm choosing the way I want to

430
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Speaker 3: live and feel good about it and do.

431
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Speaker 2: The best that you can.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, are you did?

433
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:30,840
Speaker 2: I read somewhere that you guys are maybe trying to

434
00:21:31,520 --> 00:21:35,119
Speaker 2: do some IVF or get pregnant. Oh yes, so I

435
00:21:35,160 --> 00:21:38,960
Speaker 2: went through IVF two, So I fully brutal, brutal, brutal.

436
00:21:39,359 --> 00:21:41,240
Speaker 3: Did you do one round or I had.

437
00:21:41,119 --> 00:21:41,880
Speaker 4: To do multiple?

438
00:21:41,960 --> 00:21:44,679
Speaker 2: I mean my kids are all older now, but I

439
00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:47,280
Speaker 2: had to do multiple rounds for my son Cruise.

440
00:21:47,520 --> 00:21:47,960
Speaker 4: Yeah.

441
00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:50,920
Speaker 2: And finally the last time, they're like, if this time

442
00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:55,080
Speaker 2: doesn't work, Oh and that was cruise Cruise.

443
00:21:55,400 --> 00:21:59,280
Speaker 3: That like makes me happy for so many reasons. Yeah.

444
00:21:59,280 --> 00:22:01,280
Speaker 3: So when I was when we thought we were gonna

445
00:22:01,280 --> 00:22:04,000
Speaker 3: have to go through chemo, I say, we like, everything's

446
00:22:04,000 --> 00:22:07,160
Speaker 3: like a partner with him. The one thing they're like, okay,

447
00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:09,320
Speaker 3: well you should probably freeze some eggs because it could

448
00:22:09,400 --> 00:22:14,199
Speaker 3: impact your your embryos and or your eggs and so

449
00:22:14,240 --> 00:22:17,680
Speaker 3: we did IVF one time. It was so hard, as

450
00:22:17,760 --> 00:22:20,800
Speaker 3: you know, I don't like needles, and then they're just

451
00:22:21,200 --> 00:22:23,840
Speaker 3: I had to have him do it if he wasn't there, Yeah,

452
00:22:23,840 --> 00:22:26,119
Speaker 3: I have to lay down. I would put like a

453
00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:28,480
Speaker 3: can of coke like on my stomach to like numb

454
00:22:28,480 --> 00:22:31,080
Speaker 3: it and close my eyes. I literally have a scarf

455
00:22:31,080 --> 00:22:33,560
Speaker 3: from like digging my nail into like my skin. I

456
00:22:34,359 --> 00:22:37,360
Speaker 3: cannot do needles, and like Harry, I'm now getting needles

457
00:22:37,359 --> 00:22:40,680
Speaker 3: in me every month. But yeah, so we did IVF.

458
00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:41,520
Speaker 4: Uh.

459
00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:44,080
Speaker 3: We we have two embryos, and so that's when your

460
00:22:44,119 --> 00:22:48,879
Speaker 3: like story like gives me hope because two things, I

461
00:22:48,920 --> 00:22:51,120
Speaker 3: will not be able to carry my own baby because

462
00:22:51,160 --> 00:22:53,520
Speaker 3: of the type of cans right half, which means I

463
00:22:53,520 --> 00:22:58,120
Speaker 3: have to do surrogacy. And when you only have two embryos,

464
00:22:58,600 --> 00:23:03,200
Speaker 3: you're not guaranteed a success. And so we're really hopeful

465
00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:06,639
Speaker 3: that when the time comes that we find like a

466
00:23:06,680 --> 00:23:10,040
Speaker 3: good match for us be a surrogacy, and that that

467
00:23:10,119 --> 00:23:13,359
Speaker 3: baby takes because right now we only have two and

468
00:23:13,440 --> 00:23:14,840
Speaker 3: I don't know that I will be allowed to do

469
00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:19,240
Speaker 3: IVF again because my cancer feeds off hormones and that's

470
00:23:19,280 --> 00:23:22,280
Speaker 3: all you're doing is giving your pumping yourself with hormones,

471
00:23:22,480 --> 00:23:24,440
Speaker 3: and so you know, with my treatment working, it's like

472
00:23:24,480 --> 00:23:25,679
Speaker 3: the last thing you want to do is be like, well,

473
00:23:25,720 --> 00:23:27,520
Speaker 3: let's reverse that now, you know.

474
00:23:28,480 --> 00:23:31,879
Speaker 2: So two embryos is good to embryos, that's that's positive.

475
00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:33,119
Speaker 3: All it takes us one.

476
00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:37,560
Speaker 2: And I know a couple of my best friends went

477
00:23:37,600 --> 00:23:40,800
Speaker 2: through surrogacy as well, and they were all successful.

478
00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:44,760
Speaker 3: So yeah, I'm very I'm very optimistic. I'm hopeful. It's

479
00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:47,919
Speaker 3: two girls. I just shared them republicly, but I just

480
00:23:47,960 --> 00:23:49,399
Speaker 3: feel compelled to share that with you.

481
00:23:49,480 --> 00:23:53,040
Speaker 2: So two girls, do you think you would put one in?

482
00:23:53,200 --> 00:23:53,520
Speaker 2: Or two?

483
00:23:53,920 --> 00:23:56,000
Speaker 3: I don't know, Like that's the way to the doctor.

484
00:23:56,119 --> 00:23:57,200
Speaker 3: Ye see what the doctor says.

485
00:23:57,240 --> 00:23:57,560
Speaker 2: See what?

486
00:23:57,720 --> 00:24:00,000
Speaker 3: Like I don't know the health is of our surgus.

487
00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:02,760
Speaker 3: Like there's so many that's a whole nother like journey

488
00:24:02,760 --> 00:24:05,280
Speaker 3: that I'm going to be sharing in the future because

489
00:24:05,320 --> 00:24:07,399
Speaker 3: it's I don't know, there's so much. And I've been

490
00:24:07,440 --> 00:24:09,959
Speaker 3: following again other people went through surrogacy, and it's like,

491
00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:12,800
Speaker 3: you got to find someone under this age, under this BMI,

492
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:15,119
Speaker 3: who's never had a C section, all these like weird

493
00:24:15,680 --> 00:24:19,000
Speaker 3: things that I just don't know about yet. They got

494
00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:21,399
Speaker 3: to be like you know within like I don't know

495
00:24:21,520 --> 00:24:26,280
Speaker 3: the New York area. Some states don't even allow surrogacy,

496
00:24:25,960 --> 00:24:29,480
Speaker 3: which which is insane, especially coming from someone like me.

497
00:24:29,640 --> 00:24:31,639
Speaker 3: Like I'm not doing it because I don't want to

498
00:24:31,680 --> 00:24:33,160
Speaker 3: have my own baby.

499
00:24:33,280 --> 00:24:36,560
Speaker 2: But even if you didn't want to have your own baby, yeah,

500
00:24:36,640 --> 00:24:40,600
Speaker 2: Like it's not somebody else's decision.

501
00:24:40,320 --> 00:24:42,200
Speaker 3: Right, and no one's forcing it, you know.

502
00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:46,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like it's I can't understand when people have a

503
00:24:46,359 --> 00:24:51,399
Speaker 2: problem with that, because it's like, you want a child

504
00:24:53,119 --> 00:24:57,200
Speaker 2: and we shouldn't be judged on how that happens. Yeah,

505
00:24:57,320 --> 00:24:59,320
Speaker 2: I mean I was even judged for doing IVF.

506
00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:04,440
Speaker 3: People do not understand.

507
00:25:01,480 --> 00:25:07,320
Speaker 2: It, Are you serious? Like it is the most is brutal,

508
00:25:07,400 --> 00:25:09,480
Speaker 2: It is hard, and I have friends who have done

509
00:25:10,240 --> 00:25:15,360
Speaker 2: multiple rounds five VF and never even gotten a numbry.

510
00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:17,640
Speaker 3: I'm not a doctor, no, No, I mean it's it's

511
00:25:17,680 --> 00:25:19,000
Speaker 3: all the same essentially.

512
00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:25,679
Speaker 2: Yeah, what's something you wish people better understood about supporting

513
00:25:25,680 --> 00:25:27,240
Speaker 2: you through this journey?

514
00:25:29,280 --> 00:25:32,160
Speaker 3: I mean, I think because I've been so public about

515
00:25:32,160 --> 00:25:34,240
Speaker 3: my feelings, people are doing a really good job at

516
00:25:34,560 --> 00:25:38,320
Speaker 3: figuring it out. I do think people look at me

517
00:25:38,560 --> 00:25:41,520
Speaker 3: and just assume I'm okay. You know, they're they're like, oh,

518
00:25:41,520 --> 00:25:43,919
Speaker 3: you don't look sick. You don't look like a stage

519
00:25:43,960 --> 00:25:47,240
Speaker 3: four cancer patient, you know. Or they see me going

520
00:25:47,280 --> 00:25:50,119
Speaker 3: out and they're like, you're fine, you know. And I

521
00:25:50,119 --> 00:25:53,120
Speaker 3: think what people need to really remember is like cancer

522
00:25:53,240 --> 00:25:56,560
Speaker 3: isn't a competition. It's not who has the worst you know,

523
00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:59,560
Speaker 3: treatment or the worst type of cancer. Like the cancer

524
00:25:59,600 --> 00:26:02,480
Speaker 3: club just sucks, regardless of like stage zero, stage four,

525
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:06,440
Speaker 3: It all sucks. And so just really trying to continue

526
00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:10,280
Speaker 3: to stay supportive and not like minimize someone's experience.

527
00:26:10,440 --> 00:26:13,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think minimizing someone's experience. And then but how

528
00:26:13,800 --> 00:26:15,600
Speaker 2: do you feel when someone comes up to you that

529
00:26:15,640 --> 00:26:18,200
Speaker 2: you don't know and wants to talk to you about it?

530
00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:21,080
Speaker 3: I'm I'm happy. I'm always happy to talk about it.

531
00:26:21,119 --> 00:26:23,840
Speaker 3: I will typically like cry. They'll be like I'm following

532
00:26:23,880 --> 00:26:26,040
Speaker 3: your journey, and I already like know where this conversation

533
00:26:26,160 --> 00:26:28,959
Speaker 3: is going, and I'll just get emotional with them. But

534
00:26:29,160 --> 00:26:33,200
Speaker 3: I love it. I want to share. I know people

535
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:34,760
Speaker 3: like you and I, as we continue to share our

536
00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:38,360
Speaker 3: own experiences is making a difference. And I always say,

537
00:26:38,359 --> 00:26:41,080
Speaker 3: like turning pain into purpose and you may never know

538
00:26:41,160 --> 00:26:43,800
Speaker 3: the impact you might have on someone. But I can

539
00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:47,719
Speaker 3: say very confidently you have saved somebody's life, you know,

540
00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:50,439
Speaker 3: And I think that makes I don't want to say

541
00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:52,080
Speaker 3: it makes this worth it. But if there's someone to

542
00:26:52,119 --> 00:26:55,760
Speaker 3: have cancer, I feel glad that it's me. I know

543
00:26:55,800 --> 00:26:57,159
Speaker 3: that sounds like such a weird thing to say, but

544
00:26:57,240 --> 00:26:59,040
Speaker 3: like I have a platform of women that I can

545
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:02,520
Speaker 3: like educate, I have a career that allows me to

546
00:27:02,640 --> 00:27:05,400
Speaker 3: like continue, you know, at the pace that I can

547
00:27:05,440 --> 00:27:08,040
Speaker 3: do so, and I have a supportive husband and lifestyle

548
00:27:08,080 --> 00:27:10,359
Speaker 3: and it, you know, it's cancer sucks, but like I'm

549
00:27:10,560 --> 00:27:13,040
Speaker 3: I'm happy it's me and not someone else who like

550
00:27:13,560 --> 00:27:17,160
Speaker 3: you know, can't leave their job or like doesn't have support.

551
00:27:17,600 --> 00:27:19,520
Speaker 2: How did your did your sex life change?

552
00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:24,480
Speaker 3: Yeah? Girl all ran to be honest, it's sorry, Jeff,

553
00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:26,240
Speaker 3: I don't know the last time we had sex right now.

554
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:28,600
Speaker 2: You're like, I don't know. It's no longer two times

555
00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:29,760
Speaker 2: a week, three times a week.

556
00:27:30,040 --> 00:27:33,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's it's like there's just so much changes with

557
00:27:33,119 --> 00:27:35,919
Speaker 3: my body, especially with menopause, Like things are not the

558
00:27:35,920 --> 00:27:37,800
Speaker 3: same down there, and that's something I'm still trying to

559
00:27:37,840 --> 00:27:40,400
Speaker 3: figure out what to do. And then of course he's

560
00:27:40,440 --> 00:27:42,600
Speaker 3: like very sensitive to like I don't want to hurt you,

561
00:27:42,800 --> 00:27:44,280
Speaker 3: you know, and then like even like the breast and

562
00:27:44,280 --> 00:27:45,280
Speaker 3: I'm like, they'll touch the breast.

563
00:27:45,440 --> 00:27:46,560
Speaker 2: You watch Dying for Sex?

564
00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:48,840
Speaker 3: I made it maybe twenty minutes into it and I

565
00:27:48,880 --> 00:27:51,560
Speaker 3: could not watch it. I did you watch the whole thing?

566
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:55,919
Speaker 2: I watched almost the whole thing. Oh, how did.

567
00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:56,600
Speaker 3: You feel about that?

568
00:27:56,760 --> 00:27:57,040
Speaker 5: Well?

569
00:27:57,200 --> 00:27:59,879
Speaker 2: I mean there are parts that I could totally see myself,

570
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:03,080
Speaker 2: like the part where like she's like, all right, I'm

571
00:28:03,080 --> 00:28:05,520
Speaker 2: going to try to watch a porn and then she

572
00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:08,520
Speaker 2: doesn't realize she's videoing herself and she ends up selling

573
00:28:08,560 --> 00:28:12,800
Speaker 2: the porn. Yeah, Like she thinks she's just going online

574
00:28:12,800 --> 00:28:16,000
Speaker 2: to look. But so she goes online, finds like a

575
00:28:16,040 --> 00:28:18,280
Speaker 2: porn or someone to chat with or something like that,

576
00:28:18,720 --> 00:28:24,679
Speaker 2: and as she's watching it, she's pleasuring herself and but

577
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:26,879
Speaker 2: really it's recording her. And then all of a sudden

578
00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:29,720
Speaker 2: it sends out like this is going to be sent

579
00:28:29,800 --> 00:28:31,640
Speaker 2: out to the world Wide Web, and so she has

580
00:28:31,680 --> 00:28:33,840
Speaker 2: to call her ex husband and be like.

581
00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:36,480
Speaker 3: Oh, oh my gosh. And this is based on a

582
00:28:36,520 --> 00:28:40,040
Speaker 3: true story. Yes, wow, Because think about.

583
00:28:39,800 --> 00:28:41,760
Speaker 2: The amount of times like we click on the wrong

584
00:28:41,840 --> 00:28:43,880
Speaker 2: stuff now and we talk about how we are with

585
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:45,560
Speaker 2: our phone but I'm like, oh my gosh, but it

586
00:28:45,600 --> 00:28:48,760
Speaker 2: was I mean, it's heartbreaking, but it also there are

587
00:28:48,840 --> 00:28:50,600
Speaker 2: things that I was as I was watching it, I

588
00:28:50,680 --> 00:28:54,400
Speaker 2: was like, oh, I could see this because for me,

589
00:28:54,560 --> 00:28:57,760
Speaker 2: there's times where I feel like very sexual and there

590
00:28:57,800 --> 00:29:02,640
Speaker 2: are times where I'm like I can't even imagine going

591
00:29:02,680 --> 00:29:06,440
Speaker 2: on a date right now. Yeah, I can't even imagine

592
00:29:06,880 --> 00:29:08,160
Speaker 2: having that type of conversation.

593
00:29:09,680 --> 00:29:13,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's like I like hate that for you, because

594
00:29:14,960 --> 00:29:18,040
Speaker 3: I wouldn't know how to date in this situation anymore.

595
00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:22,480
Speaker 3: Like I feel very like fortunate to have Jeff. But yeah,

596
00:29:22,600 --> 00:29:24,880
Speaker 3: I know a few friends who are stage four and

597
00:29:25,040 --> 00:29:28,080
Speaker 3: they're you know, in the dating scene and they just

598
00:29:28,120 --> 00:29:30,360
Speaker 3: have to like lead with it up front, and then

599
00:29:30,560 --> 00:29:33,360
Speaker 3: they come across people who kind of like almost like

600
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:34,880
Speaker 3: turn it into like a fetish of like all be

601
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:38,400
Speaker 3: your savior or like the hero dating the cancer girl,

602
00:29:38,560 --> 00:29:40,800
Speaker 3: you know, and so you really have to like pick

603
00:29:40,880 --> 00:29:44,120
Speaker 3: through like weirdos to find like the genuine guy who

604
00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:49,560
Speaker 3: also can see like, hey, like I'm still me, you know, overall.

605
00:29:49,760 --> 00:29:55,080
Speaker 2: Very true, very true, And how has your perspective on

606
00:29:55,240 --> 00:29:58,240
Speaker 2: life changed? And like even if we go back to

607
00:29:58,280 --> 00:30:01,320
Speaker 2: like the bachelor days, yeah, or like are there things

608
00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:03,240
Speaker 2: you look back on it and you're like, wow, I

609
00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:04,760
Speaker 2: wish I would have done this differently.

610
00:30:05,520 --> 00:30:07,880
Speaker 3: I think the first thing that I noticed right away

611
00:30:08,240 --> 00:30:13,000
Speaker 3: was like my view on like beauty, because like it's

612
00:30:13,040 --> 00:30:16,920
Speaker 3: so like beautiful to be alive versus just like to

613
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:20,200
Speaker 3: be skinny or like to be pretty. You know, like

614
00:30:20,600 --> 00:30:23,640
Speaker 3: it's hard to understand or to put into words eloquently,

615
00:30:23,680 --> 00:30:26,720
Speaker 3: but it's like I find like what's beautiful is like

616
00:30:26,840 --> 00:30:30,240
Speaker 3: life now, you know, and like I like care less

617
00:30:30,280 --> 00:30:33,160
Speaker 3: about like a cell you'll light or gate weight gain

618
00:30:33,280 --> 00:30:36,880
Speaker 3: or whatever, because I'm just like every day I'm just

619
00:30:36,960 --> 00:30:38,080
Speaker 3: like happy to be here now.

620
00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:38,680
Speaker 2: You know.

621
00:30:39,960 --> 00:30:44,080
Speaker 3: I view like elderly people like with such like respect

622
00:30:44,160 --> 00:30:47,320
Speaker 3: because I'm like you made it this far, you know,

623
00:30:47,360 --> 00:30:50,000
Speaker 3: like you view them and you're like damn, like good

624
00:30:50,080 --> 00:30:52,640
Speaker 3: for you. You know, like every wrinkle is like a blessing,

625
00:30:52,720 --> 00:30:55,560
Speaker 3: and every child now is a blessing. Like you just

626
00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:58,480
Speaker 3: view like life almost like you're on like drugs, like

627
00:30:58,560 --> 00:31:00,840
Speaker 3: or you're a molly. You're like everything it's beautiful now.

628
00:31:01,600 --> 00:31:05,160
Speaker 3: You just appreciate things like so much more and like

629
00:31:05,200 --> 00:31:07,440
Speaker 3: the petty shit that you like fought about or like

630
00:31:07,520 --> 00:31:10,080
Speaker 3: grudges you're like none of that matters.

631
00:31:10,320 --> 00:31:13,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like I don't have I don't have the capacity

632
00:31:13,240 --> 00:31:16,160
Speaker 2: for it. But when you're just talking about like the

633
00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:19,880
Speaker 2: appearance thing, I was talking to somebody the other day

634
00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:22,080
Speaker 2: and I want I want to say I feel the

635
00:31:22,120 --> 00:31:24,960
Speaker 2: same way, like I really want to believe it because

636
00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:27,360
Speaker 2: I do. But I notice that the thing that I'm

637
00:31:27,440 --> 00:31:32,240
Speaker 2: hardest on myself about right now is the appearance stuff.

638
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:34,160
Speaker 2: Like They'll send me a clip from this pod and

639
00:31:34,160 --> 00:31:36,840
Speaker 2: I'll be like, oh my gosh, put a filter on that,

640
00:31:37,360 --> 00:31:41,800
Speaker 2: Like I can't even with myself right now, and I

641
00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:44,320
Speaker 2: find myself being hard on myself, and then I have

642
00:31:44,400 --> 00:31:48,520
Speaker 2: to have that conversation like yeah, Petty, you're there, you're working,

643
00:31:48,960 --> 00:31:52,440
Speaker 2: you're doing the best that you can. You're beautiful, like

644
00:31:52,440 --> 00:31:58,360
Speaker 2: like giving myself self like positivity versus tearing myself down

645
00:31:58,360 --> 00:32:01,560
Speaker 2: because it's easy when you're feeling really low to tear

646
00:32:01,600 --> 00:32:03,800
Speaker 2: yourself down. Yeah, but you're such I.

647
00:32:03,760 --> 00:32:07,760
Speaker 3: Mean, but your feelings are so valid and real and relatable.

648
00:32:07,800 --> 00:32:11,080
Speaker 3: Like that's like what you're saying. We all we as

649
00:32:11,120 --> 00:32:15,240
Speaker 3: cancer and girls, we all go through you know, And

650
00:32:15,560 --> 00:32:17,480
Speaker 3: it's I think especially people like us who are like

651
00:32:17,920 --> 00:32:21,160
Speaker 3: on this like elevated platform of like constantly having to

652
00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:24,360
Speaker 3: see ourselves on a camera, on a photo. It makes

653
00:32:24,400 --> 00:32:27,120
Speaker 3: it extra hard for sure. And I think I always

654
00:32:27,120 --> 00:32:31,120
Speaker 3: tell people like cancer is like a practice lifestyle, like

655
00:32:31,240 --> 00:32:35,520
Speaker 3: practice mindset, because we are going through these like highs

656
00:32:35,560 --> 00:32:36,920
Speaker 3: and lows, like as much as you could be like,

657
00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:39,880
Speaker 3: oh my god, you're so positive. See me last night,

658
00:32:39,920 --> 00:32:41,320
Speaker 3: I was bawling my eyes out here, you.

659
00:32:41,240 --> 00:32:43,239
Speaker 2: Know, because that's the thing people will say to me too.

660
00:32:43,320 --> 00:32:45,560
Speaker 2: They'll be like, well, you're up and you're walking and

661
00:32:45,560 --> 00:32:48,239
Speaker 2: you're doing things. I'm like, you have no idea of

662
00:32:48,240 --> 00:32:50,720
Speaker 2: what it was like to get there. Yeah, And I

663
00:32:51,040 --> 00:32:53,959
Speaker 2: my goal is to go one mile. Yeah, Like I before,

664
00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:56,440
Speaker 2: I would honestly wake up on a Saturday morning and

665
00:32:56,440 --> 00:32:58,920
Speaker 2: be like, I'm gonna run ten miles today. Now I'm like,

666
00:32:59,360 --> 00:33:01,360
Speaker 2: if you can get that one mile, and I'm really

667
00:33:01,400 --> 00:33:02,200
Speaker 2: proud of you, Teddy.

668
00:33:02,320 --> 00:33:04,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that's great. What one bite at a

669
00:33:04,640 --> 00:33:09,400
Speaker 3: time is my motto because same, Oh yeah.

670
00:33:08,680 --> 00:33:13,320
Speaker 2: What's something you wish people better understood about this entire process?

671
00:33:14,840 --> 00:33:18,920
Speaker 3: Hm better understood? I think the biggest thing I pushed

672
00:33:19,040 --> 00:33:23,360
Speaker 3: now is that cancer doesn't discriminate. I think people always

673
00:33:23,400 --> 00:33:26,360
Speaker 3: thought like young people don't get cancer, or like cancers

674
00:33:26,360 --> 00:33:28,640
Speaker 3: are my family, so I'm safe. And it's like you

675
00:33:28,720 --> 00:33:31,400
Speaker 3: gotta do all your checks, not just your breast but

676
00:33:31,440 --> 00:33:34,520
Speaker 3: your skin, and talk to your doctor. And I think

677
00:33:34,560 --> 00:33:37,080
Speaker 3: women are really good about that, or typically are men.

678
00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:37,560
Speaker 2: Men.

679
00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:39,520
Speaker 3: If you're listening, go to the doctor.

680
00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:40,600
Speaker 4: Go to the doctor.

681
00:33:40,720 --> 00:33:44,520
Speaker 2: Go and get your colonoscopy. Yes, yes, And it takes

682
00:33:44,560 --> 00:33:47,160
Speaker 2: a while to book an appointment. Yes, it's frustrating, but

683
00:33:47,280 --> 00:34:00,959
Speaker 2: like it's worth it. You had that you had felt

684
00:34:01,560 --> 00:34:04,840
Speaker 2: your pain for for a little while in your breast,

685
00:34:05,360 --> 00:34:09,040
Speaker 2: how long before you actually went in? Because I still

686
00:34:09,239 --> 00:34:11,600
Speaker 2: to this day can't believe I waited with the headaches

687
00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:12,200
Speaker 2: for so long.

688
00:34:12,480 --> 00:34:17,360
Speaker 3: I sympathize because I had the lump maybe seven months

689
00:34:17,400 --> 00:34:19,440
Speaker 3: before I got it checked out. Not only did I

690
00:34:19,480 --> 00:34:22,120
Speaker 3: have the lump, I had a scan, you know those

691
00:34:22,120 --> 00:34:23,080
Speaker 3: full body scans.

692
00:34:23,400 --> 00:34:24,240
Speaker 2: I got a preneval.

693
00:34:24,360 --> 00:34:26,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, I did too, Yes, And when I got I

694
00:34:26,520 --> 00:34:29,560
Speaker 3: remember getting the results. And because I had a benign

695
00:34:30,120 --> 00:34:32,680
Speaker 3: cyst in the past, the I remember the nurse. I'll

696
00:34:32,680 --> 00:34:35,040
Speaker 3: never forget this conversation because like there's always gonna be

697
00:34:35,080 --> 00:34:37,920
Speaker 3: a little bit of resent towards her and myself for

698
00:34:38,040 --> 00:34:40,799
Speaker 3: like you said, for waiting so long, and the way

699
00:34:40,800 --> 00:34:43,000
Speaker 3: she worded it. I didn't know the word malignancy, Like

700
00:34:43,040 --> 00:34:44,920
Speaker 3: that's not a word I use. I don't know what

701
00:34:44,960 --> 00:34:46,880
Speaker 3: that means. I didn't look it up, you know, but

702
00:34:46,920 --> 00:34:50,560
Speaker 3: I remember her saying like, oh, it's probably old scar

703
00:34:50,719 --> 00:34:54,800
Speaker 3: tissue from your lumpectomy when you're in your early twenties

704
00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:57,960
Speaker 3: and you're of course looking for like confirmation bias, and

705
00:34:57,960 --> 00:35:01,080
Speaker 3: you're like, yeah, totally of course not cancer. That's crazy.

706
00:35:01,640 --> 00:35:03,200
Speaker 3: And then like the longer this lump stay and the

707
00:35:03,239 --> 00:35:05,520
Speaker 3: bigger it gotten, the more painful about I remember looking

708
00:35:05,560 --> 00:35:07,840
Speaker 3: back at that report and like kind of like copying

709
00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:11,080
Speaker 3: and pasting it and then learning to sounds so stupid,

710
00:35:11,080 --> 00:35:14,040
Speaker 3: but learning what the word malignancy meant. And in that

711
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:17,760
Speaker 3: report it basically said like, it could be it could cancer.

712
00:35:18,120 --> 00:35:21,319
Speaker 3: You should get further exploration. Didn't do that. I was

713
00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:23,160
Speaker 3: not pushed by this, you know. I don't know what

714
00:35:23,239 --> 00:35:27,839
Speaker 3: her title was, but this person on the phone, And yeah,

715
00:35:27,920 --> 00:35:31,160
Speaker 3: there's moments where I like really regret not going in

716
00:35:31,239 --> 00:35:34,080
Speaker 3: sooner because maybe I wouldn't have been stage four, but

717
00:35:34,239 --> 00:35:35,880
Speaker 3: also yeah.

718
00:35:35,719 --> 00:35:38,600
Speaker 2: It's like I'm the same. I'm like I had the

719
00:35:38,640 --> 00:35:42,640
Speaker 2: headaches for like over six months and I had self

720
00:35:42,680 --> 00:35:45,600
Speaker 2: diagnosed myself with I'd be like, oh, you have migraines,

721
00:35:45,640 --> 00:35:48,279
Speaker 2: now right, you're going to menopause. And then it took

722
00:35:48,360 --> 00:35:51,479
Speaker 2: me being like on the floor crying, not being able

723
00:35:51,520 --> 00:35:53,919
Speaker 2: to move, and somebody taking me to the emergency room

724
00:35:54,280 --> 00:35:55,080
Speaker 2: to go to the doctor.

725
00:35:55,400 --> 00:35:58,239
Speaker 3: And it's crazy because I would also wonder like, had

726
00:35:58,280 --> 00:36:00,160
Speaker 3: you gone in like that first month if you like,

727
00:36:00,200 --> 00:36:03,759
Speaker 3: women's health is so downplayed by doctors often like they

728
00:36:04,440 --> 00:36:06,480
Speaker 3: very well might have said it is a migraine, you know.

729
00:36:06,600 --> 00:36:08,920
Speaker 3: So I agree, like, we can't go back and be

730
00:36:08,960 --> 00:36:11,640
Speaker 3: like what if, what if? What if? Because who knows

731
00:36:11,680 --> 00:36:13,759
Speaker 3: even then what would have happened. But that's the thing

732
00:36:13,760 --> 00:36:16,359
Speaker 3: I try to push women especially, is like push for

733
00:36:16,440 --> 00:36:19,439
Speaker 3: your health, push back on your doctor, because they're still

734
00:36:19,480 --> 00:36:21,960
Speaker 3: doctors telling women today like, oh, you're too young for

735
00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:25,000
Speaker 3: breast cancer, and that pisses me off. And so I

736
00:36:25,040 --> 00:36:27,040
Speaker 3: tell them, oh, tell your doctor put that in your chart.

737
00:36:27,080 --> 00:36:29,080
Speaker 3: Then see how quickly their tune changes.

738
00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:31,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, And something else that I've mentioned, which I don't

739
00:36:31,440 --> 00:36:34,440
Speaker 2: know if you've found the same thing is make sure

740
00:36:34,719 --> 00:36:37,160
Speaker 2: that even if your doctor doesn't tell you to get

741
00:36:37,239 --> 00:36:40,120
Speaker 2: the other types of appointments, go get them mm hmm,

742
00:36:40,719 --> 00:36:43,040
Speaker 2: Like you should go get your skin checked.

743
00:36:43,120 --> 00:36:44,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, oh I did. I got my skin checked, my

744
00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:47,399
Speaker 3: colonosk piece next month, and mammogram.

745
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:49,279
Speaker 2: We gotta do all. I had to go get a

746
00:36:49,320 --> 00:36:51,520
Speaker 2: mamma grant, Like, we got to do all of those things.

747
00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:54,839
Speaker 2: It's not just and your doctor isn't going to hold

748
00:36:54,880 --> 00:36:58,080
Speaker 2: your hand and tell you yeah, book all the other appointments.

749
00:36:58,120 --> 00:37:00,960
Speaker 2: They're going to manage what they're managing totally.

750
00:37:01,000 --> 00:37:03,080
Speaker 3: And I wish that. I'm so glad you said that,

751
00:37:03,120 --> 00:37:05,799
Speaker 3: because it's also like one of those things you like

752
00:37:06,080 --> 00:37:08,359
Speaker 3: learn as you go, and I wish like in high

753
00:37:08,360 --> 00:37:10,600
Speaker 3: school they're like, by the way, as an adult, here's

754
00:37:10,640 --> 00:37:12,319
Speaker 3: some things to look out for, you know, and you

755
00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:14,920
Speaker 3: don't you don't know. And thank god there's the Internet

756
00:37:14,960 --> 00:37:18,600
Speaker 3: and social media for like education, because otherwise, how like

757
00:37:18,719 --> 00:37:20,680
Speaker 3: how are people supposed to know to like?

758
00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:24,279
Speaker 2: And everybody thinks like, oh, well, I don't I don't

759
00:37:24,320 --> 00:37:27,399
Speaker 2: need I don't need this because you know, in my mind,

760
00:37:27,480 --> 00:37:29,440
Speaker 2: I go, why do I need to get a mammogram?

761
00:37:29,480 --> 00:37:31,120
Speaker 2: I got one seven years ago when I got my

762
00:37:31,160 --> 00:37:35,520
Speaker 2: boobs done. Yeah, like no, you still have to go

763
00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:38,200
Speaker 2: back and get it checked. Yeah, Like now that this

764
00:37:38,280 --> 00:37:38,920
Speaker 2: has happened.

765
00:37:39,040 --> 00:37:42,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, so actually curious about that. Can you with I

766
00:37:42,400 --> 00:37:43,319
Speaker 3: assume Breston plants.

767
00:37:43,680 --> 00:37:46,160
Speaker 2: Can you do a mammogram or you can still do

768
00:37:46,200 --> 00:37:46,680
Speaker 2: the mammogram?

769
00:37:46,760 --> 00:37:48,160
Speaker 3: You ask me, I'm like, I don't know yet because

770
00:37:48,160 --> 00:37:51,040
Speaker 3: I have my double mistectomy planned in November.

771
00:37:51,160 --> 00:37:52,680
Speaker 2: Oh you do? Are you doing it here?

772
00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:54,000
Speaker 3: I'm going to go to San Francisco?

773
00:37:54,080 --> 00:37:54,360
Speaker 4: Okay?

774
00:37:54,480 --> 00:37:56,319
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I found a surgeon I really like. But

775
00:37:56,400 --> 00:37:58,200
Speaker 3: I was like, people, can you still do marragrams? Like,

776
00:37:58,280 --> 00:38:00,359
Speaker 3: I don't know, I'm learning. I was like, yo, because

777
00:38:00,440 --> 00:38:01,640
Speaker 3: so that's something you didn't.

778
00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:04,759
Speaker 2: Tell me before. You're getting a double misctomy. Yes, okay, yep,

779
00:38:05,239 --> 00:38:09,520
Speaker 2: And so is that two different surgeons? So you have

780
00:38:09,560 --> 00:38:11,959
Speaker 2: one surgeon that removes and then one surgeon that puts

781
00:38:11,960 --> 00:38:14,279
Speaker 2: in an implant? Or are you going to get one

782
00:38:14,360 --> 00:38:17,120
Speaker 2: of my friends has like kind of like a a

783
00:38:17,160 --> 00:38:19,160
Speaker 2: bar right, oh expander expander?

784
00:38:19,320 --> 00:38:19,560
Speaker 4: Yes?

785
00:38:19,680 --> 00:38:22,600
Speaker 3: Yes, so it all it's all varies, like there's that's

786
00:38:22,640 --> 00:38:26,520
Speaker 3: a whole complex thing. I am going direct to implant

787
00:38:26,560 --> 00:38:28,960
Speaker 3: because I'm going to try to stay like my same size.

788
00:38:29,120 --> 00:38:32,040
Speaker 3: An expander comes into play when there's radiation which will

789
00:38:32,080 --> 00:38:34,600
Speaker 3: shrink the skin or maybe the person wants to maybe

790
00:38:34,719 --> 00:38:37,560
Speaker 3: have a better, you know, size than what they had,

791
00:38:37,640 --> 00:38:40,600
Speaker 3: and so you have to expand the skin. So I

792
00:38:40,680 --> 00:38:43,640
Speaker 3: found someone who is certified as I guess both. I

793
00:38:43,680 --> 00:38:46,520
Speaker 3: don't know a surgeon. I don't I don't know the terminology,

794
00:38:46,719 --> 00:38:49,200
Speaker 3: but she can do the removal of my breast and

795
00:38:49,320 --> 00:38:50,560
Speaker 3: give me my new breasts.

796
00:38:50,880 --> 00:38:54,319
Speaker 2: Did they say that there's Is it the same type

797
00:38:54,320 --> 00:38:57,920
Speaker 2: of healing as just getting a regular boob job or

798
00:38:58,000 --> 00:39:00,000
Speaker 2: is it more intensive? Have they told?

799
00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:02,799
Speaker 3: I feel like it's more intense based on people I've

800
00:39:02,800 --> 00:39:06,280
Speaker 3: talked to who have had just implants versus the double mestectomy.

801
00:39:07,480 --> 00:39:09,080
Speaker 3: But I've also heard a lot of people saying like

802
00:39:09,120 --> 00:39:14,160
Speaker 3: their recovery was better than they anticipated. Even my surgeon

803
00:39:14,280 --> 00:39:16,400
Speaker 3: in San Francisco, she's like, yeah, some of my patients

804
00:39:16,400 --> 00:39:18,799
Speaker 3: will just you know, go wine tasting like a day

805
00:39:18,880 --> 00:39:22,480
Speaker 3: or two later. So I'm not like banking on them,

806
00:39:22,560 --> 00:39:26,680
Speaker 3: but I could. Yeah, people, overall, I feel like it'll

807
00:39:26,680 --> 00:39:29,839
Speaker 3: be better than I thought. But I'm if I plan

808
00:39:29,960 --> 00:39:32,480
Speaker 3: for the worst and it's better, then like that's a window.

809
00:39:33,080 --> 00:39:34,760
Speaker 2: And did they say you had to have the double

810
00:39:34,800 --> 00:39:36,520
Speaker 2: mistectomy or is that a choice?

811
00:39:36,680 --> 00:39:39,800
Speaker 3: That was my choice. It's very interesting especially a stage four.

812
00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:41,680
Speaker 3: I feel like a lot of us are kind of

813
00:39:41,680 --> 00:39:43,719
Speaker 3: like pushed to the side of like, well you have

814
00:39:43,800 --> 00:39:46,719
Speaker 3: it forever, what's the point, you know? And for me,

815
00:39:46,840 --> 00:39:49,759
Speaker 3: I had genetic testing done and I also have what's

816
00:39:49,760 --> 00:39:53,719
Speaker 3: called like an ATM genetic mutation, which slightly increases your

817
00:39:53,760 --> 00:39:56,560
Speaker 3: chance for breast cancer. And so I was just like,

818
00:39:57,000 --> 00:39:59,680
Speaker 3: I want these off. I want like the peace of mind.

819
00:39:59,719 --> 00:40:01,239
Speaker 3: I don't want any like, I want to do anything

820
00:40:01,280 --> 00:40:05,360
Speaker 3: I can to like support and so smart. Yeah, and

821
00:40:05,360 --> 00:40:07,440
Speaker 3: it's like why wouldn't you, you know, And so a

822
00:40:07,480 --> 00:40:10,520
Speaker 3: lot of people it's like fifty to fifty. Some people

823
00:40:10,520 --> 00:40:12,480
Speaker 3: are like, my surgeon won't let me. I'm like, maybe

824
00:40:12,480 --> 00:40:14,719
Speaker 3: that surgeon won't because my my immediate one in New

825
00:40:14,760 --> 00:40:16,120
Speaker 3: York didn't want to do that. She wanted to do

826
00:40:16,160 --> 00:40:17,920
Speaker 3: a lumpecto me. And it's like I'll find someone else.

827
00:40:17,960 --> 00:40:20,080
Speaker 3: And I did. And so that's what I tell other people.

828
00:40:20,120 --> 00:40:23,080
Speaker 3: I'm like, maybe your immediate surgeon doesn't want to that

829
00:40:23,160 --> 00:40:25,680
Speaker 3: doesn't mean you aren't entitled to have one and find

830
00:40:25,719 --> 00:40:27,239
Speaker 3: someone who will do it for you.

831
00:40:27,239 --> 00:40:28,560
Speaker 2: You have to be an advocate for yourself.

832
00:40:28,640 --> 00:40:28,879
Speaker 4: Yep.

833
00:40:29,320 --> 00:40:34,080
Speaker 2: What advice would you give to somebody else that's going

834
00:40:34,120 --> 00:40:34,640
Speaker 2: through this.

835
00:40:35,520 --> 00:40:40,160
Speaker 3: I would tell them, oh, cry again. I'll tell them

836
00:40:40,160 --> 00:40:43,360
Speaker 3: that the beginning is the hardest and that it gets better.

837
00:40:43,640 --> 00:40:47,600
Speaker 3: I think people will experience the lowest low that they've

838
00:40:47,640 --> 00:40:51,400
Speaker 3: ever ever gone through. Like the pain and sadness is

839
00:40:52,280 --> 00:40:54,400
Speaker 3: the noise of the cry. The way you cried is like,

840
00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:56,480
Speaker 3: I don't know I could cry like that. It is

841
00:40:56,560 --> 00:40:59,080
Speaker 3: so hard, And I will not downplay that in the beginning,

842
00:40:59,640 --> 00:41:01,799
Speaker 3: but I I want to tell people like there there

843
00:41:01,880 --> 00:41:04,040
Speaker 3: is like the other side of it. You know. In

844
00:41:04,040 --> 00:41:05,920
Speaker 3: the beginning, it's very scary, and there's a lot of

845
00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:07,839
Speaker 3: unknowns and you don't know what the hell is going on.

846
00:41:08,320 --> 00:41:10,799
Speaker 3: And then once once you have your plan and and

847
00:41:10,840 --> 00:41:13,280
Speaker 3: once you get through all those unknowns and you have answers,

848
00:41:13,640 --> 00:41:16,200
Speaker 3: like you start to like figure out what your new

849
00:41:16,280 --> 00:41:18,759
Speaker 3: life is like. It will you'll will never be the same,

850
00:41:18,920 --> 00:41:22,520
Speaker 3: that's the truth. And but it gets better and you

851
00:41:22,600 --> 00:41:25,160
Speaker 3: just got to like do do like you said, like

852
00:41:25,239 --> 00:41:27,920
Speaker 3: one one little step at a time, and and you

853
00:41:27,960 --> 00:41:29,879
Speaker 3: get through it, and once you're on the other side

854
00:41:29,920 --> 00:41:33,360
Speaker 3: of all of this chaos, you're like, holy shit, what

855
00:41:33,480 --> 00:41:34,479
Speaker 3: a year?

856
00:41:35,680 --> 00:41:38,520
Speaker 2: Wow, we really gonna Yeah, do you have like a

857
00:41:38,560 --> 00:41:39,239
Speaker 2: bucket list.

858
00:41:40,040 --> 00:41:42,400
Speaker 3: Oh okay, I let me tell you I have a

859
00:41:43,840 --> 00:41:46,719
Speaker 3: some kind of feel with the phrase bucket list, because

860
00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:49,160
Speaker 3: the term comes from like before you kick the bucket

861
00:41:49,160 --> 00:41:51,479
Speaker 3: and people want to go, you know, and I and

862
00:41:51,480 --> 00:41:52,840
Speaker 3: and now that I'm like stage four, I'm like, I

863
00:41:52,880 --> 00:41:55,160
Speaker 3: don't want to think like that. And people put this

864
00:41:55,200 --> 00:41:58,440
Speaker 3: one big item that they want to it's yeah, and

865
00:41:58,520 --> 00:42:00,480
Speaker 3: and and look if you have one, I don't like.

866
00:42:00,560 --> 00:42:02,879
Speaker 3: This is my own opinion, my own experience and thought.

867
00:42:02,920 --> 00:42:05,160
Speaker 3: It helps me live life. But I don't want to

868
00:42:05,160 --> 00:42:07,680
Speaker 3: have one big item that I do before I die.

869
00:42:08,080 --> 00:42:11,840
Speaker 3: I like to have like these little little life moments

870
00:42:11,880 --> 00:42:13,799
Speaker 3: of like, what are one hundred things I want to

871
00:42:13,800 --> 00:42:15,600
Speaker 3: do this year? I want to learn to dance with

872
00:42:15,640 --> 00:42:18,279
Speaker 3: my husband. I want to go rollerblading in Santa Marka.

873
00:42:18,440 --> 00:42:20,920
Speaker 3: Like I want to like remember to like enjoy the

874
00:42:21,000 --> 00:42:23,480
Speaker 3: little things, you know. And so for me, that's like

875
00:42:23,560 --> 00:42:25,759
Speaker 3: my version of like not I don't know what to

876
00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:27,200
Speaker 3: call it a bucket list, but like, I don't want

877
00:42:27,200 --> 00:42:28,440
Speaker 3: to have one big thing. I want to have a

878
00:42:28,520 --> 00:42:31,040
Speaker 3: hundred little things that remind me to like enjoy like

879
00:42:31,200 --> 00:42:34,560
Speaker 3: life because again, happiness, yeah, every day we are here,

880
00:42:34,640 --> 00:42:36,680
Speaker 3: I'm like, holy shit, I made it another day.

881
00:42:37,560 --> 00:42:40,640
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I know, is there anything else that

882
00:42:40,719 --> 00:42:41,480
Speaker 2: you want to share?

883
00:42:41,960 --> 00:42:44,560
Speaker 3: No, I mean no, I just love having like a

884
00:42:44,600 --> 00:42:47,400
Speaker 3: genuine conversation with you. It's been great.

885
00:42:47,680 --> 00:42:51,520
Speaker 2: I feel the same way. And for anybody listening, like

886
00:42:51,640 --> 00:42:55,280
Speaker 2: this is just honestly a reminder go get your checks.

887
00:42:56,200 --> 00:42:58,640
Speaker 2: It's not. I mean we're the fact that we're both

888
00:42:58,680 --> 00:43:02,600
Speaker 2: able to sit here and have this conversation at iHeartRadio

889
00:43:02,920 --> 00:43:07,880
Speaker 2: and like be in a studio and do this speaks

890
00:43:07,960 --> 00:43:12,240
Speaker 2: volumes to why it's important to go get checked because

891
00:43:12,320 --> 00:43:24,640
Speaker 2: if we didn't. Yeah, so I think that's that's pretty huge. Well,

892
00:43:24,880 --> 00:43:31,600
Speaker 2: this is this a moment for me. Last question in

893
00:43:31,640 --> 00:43:34,440
Speaker 2: regards to cancer, when you found out that your tumors

894
00:43:34,440 --> 00:43:36,920
Speaker 2: are streak or when you get good news, Yeah, do

895
00:43:36,960 --> 00:43:39,440
Speaker 2: you do any sort of like celebration.

896
00:43:39,280 --> 00:43:43,080
Speaker 3: Or I didn't even have a chance to. Like when

897
00:43:43,120 --> 00:43:44,600
Speaker 3: I got my it was a I think it was

898
00:43:44,640 --> 00:43:48,239
Speaker 3: a PET scan, maybe CT scan, I don't know. It

899
00:43:48,280 --> 00:43:51,719
Speaker 3: was a bunch of scans. The results came again through

900
00:43:51,800 --> 00:43:54,000
Speaker 3: my chart before I like, I'm in my uber on

901
00:43:54,080 --> 00:43:55,799
Speaker 3: my way home and the results already in and I

902
00:43:55,880 --> 00:43:57,360
Speaker 3: just like read it like I didn't care. I was

903
00:43:57,360 --> 00:44:02,200
Speaker 3: like I have to know. And then obviously my husband

904
00:44:02,320 --> 00:44:06,440
Speaker 3: were celebrating and crying, and yeah, I don't think I've

905
00:44:06,440 --> 00:44:10,680
Speaker 3: done anything to celebrate. The hope for us both is February.

906
00:44:10,680 --> 00:44:12,640
Speaker 3: We were in Hawaii. We were supposed to be having

907
00:44:12,680 --> 00:44:16,279
Speaker 3: like a little vacation together. We hope to kind of

908
00:44:16,320 --> 00:44:19,400
Speaker 3: get to redo that vacation as our celebration that like

909
00:44:19,440 --> 00:44:23,600
Speaker 3: things are going well. He's also recording his Netflix special

910
00:44:23,640 --> 00:44:24,320
Speaker 3: in December.

911
00:44:25,480 --> 00:44:29,880
Speaker 5: Nice so to release the name or he just announced

912
00:44:29,880 --> 00:44:33,160
Speaker 5: it today actually yeah, yeah, yeah, So the title of

913
00:44:33,200 --> 00:44:36,680
Speaker 5: his comedy special is called Unscripted because he's.

914
00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:38,440
Speaker 3: Like he does crowd work, but he also is a

915
00:44:38,480 --> 00:44:41,600
Speaker 3: comedian and he has written material. But he just announced

916
00:44:41,600 --> 00:44:44,520
Speaker 3: his tour dates and then I'm sorry, I just have

917
00:44:44,600 --> 00:44:47,239
Speaker 3: to brag about him. He also announced today that he's

918
00:44:47,280 --> 00:44:51,440
Speaker 3: donating one dollar for every ticket sale to BCRF, which

919
00:44:51,520 --> 00:44:53,759
Speaker 3: is a breast cancer nonprofit.

920
00:44:54,280 --> 00:44:59,120
Speaker 2: So like, this seems like a really good guy.

921
00:44:59,400 --> 00:45:01,960
Speaker 3: I had a date thirty men on TV only to

922
00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:05,040
Speaker 3: find my husband through my dms. But you know, whatever

923
00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:09,400
Speaker 3: gets me there. Yeah, I thought I was going to

924
00:45:09,440 --> 00:45:11,840
Speaker 3: be a comedian, and so I started following other comics

925
00:45:11,840 --> 00:45:14,239
Speaker 3: and he was one of them. And then one day,

926
00:45:14,239 --> 00:45:14,560
Speaker 3: hold on.

927
00:45:14,560 --> 00:45:15,560
Speaker 2: You're not being a comedian.

928
00:45:15,680 --> 00:45:18,239
Speaker 3: Well, I mean, come on, can you imagine now, Like

929
00:45:18,280 --> 00:45:20,480
Speaker 3: I'm on stage ready to like say, like the punchline,

930
00:45:20,480 --> 00:45:23,400
Speaker 3: and I'm like, hold on, my cancer is kicking in.

931
00:45:23,480 --> 00:45:26,440
Speaker 3: I just lost the momentum. But there's a lot of

932
00:45:26,640 --> 00:45:28,719
Speaker 3: new materials obviously to think about when it comes to

933
00:45:28,800 --> 00:45:32,160
Speaker 3: like this next chapter. But he is the comic, and

934
00:45:32,200 --> 00:45:35,960
Speaker 3: I'm happy to be the supportive wife and hear the

935
00:45:36,040 --> 00:45:37,320
Speaker 3: jokes in the works.

936
00:45:37,440 --> 00:45:39,120
Speaker 2: This makes me so happy.

937
00:45:39,239 --> 00:45:39,799
Speaker 4: I love that.

938
00:45:41,200 --> 00:45:42,759
Speaker 2: Okay, now we got to talk about a little bit

939
00:45:42,800 --> 00:45:44,040
Speaker 2: of reality television.

940
00:45:44,040 --> 00:45:47,960
Speaker 3: Oh I know, okay, I know, I know.

941
00:45:48,320 --> 00:45:50,920
Speaker 2: I wanted to get the the hard part out at

942
00:45:50,960 --> 00:45:54,200
Speaker 2: the beginning. But always, for anybody that's on reality television,

943
00:45:54,320 --> 00:45:58,920
Speaker 2: talking about reality TV that you've been on, if you

944
00:45:58,960 --> 00:46:02,760
Speaker 2: could change one thing about how you were portrayed.

945
00:46:03,440 --> 00:46:12,000
Speaker 3: Oh gosh, I don't know. There was this big there

946
00:46:12,040 --> 00:46:14,440
Speaker 3: was a big fight that happened with me and his

947
00:46:14,520 --> 00:46:16,440
Speaker 3: name was Greg. Anyone who watches the show, they know

948
00:46:16,520 --> 00:46:20,920
Speaker 3: exactly what I'm talking about. And honestly, knowing, my manager's

949
00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:24,760
Speaker 3: laughing in the background, knowing obviously, like how things happened.

950
00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:27,239
Speaker 3: I just wish I didn't take it so seriously. I mean,

951
00:46:27,239 --> 00:46:30,200
Speaker 3: I think producers would hate to hear that, because you're

952
00:46:30,200 --> 00:46:32,280
Speaker 3: supposed to fall in love and get engaged and stuff,

953
00:46:32,480 --> 00:46:34,759
Speaker 3: and when you're in this little bubble of reality TV

954
00:46:34,880 --> 00:46:37,840
Speaker 3: and it was COVID at the time. I was just

955
00:46:37,960 --> 00:46:41,440
Speaker 3: so devastated about this guy who I met three weeks

956
00:46:41,440 --> 00:46:44,640
Speaker 3: ago leaving, you know, and this fight, Like I just

957
00:46:44,640 --> 00:46:47,400
Speaker 3: wish I was just like more chill, just more like. Again,

958
00:46:47,520 --> 00:46:50,960
Speaker 3: producers would have hated that, but I regret like taking

959
00:46:51,000 --> 00:46:53,879
Speaker 3: it so seriously. Again, maybe it's the cancer knowing everything

960
00:46:53,920 --> 00:46:56,120
Speaker 3: I know down like that was just a fun little

961
00:46:56,120 --> 00:46:56,799
Speaker 3: moment of time.

962
00:46:56,880 --> 00:46:58,759
Speaker 2: None of it, None of it mattered, you know, none

963
00:46:58,760 --> 00:47:01,960
Speaker 2: of it really mattered. Yeah, do you watch any other

964
00:47:02,080 --> 00:47:03,000
Speaker 2: reality television?

965
00:47:03,640 --> 00:47:05,600
Speaker 3: Okay, I'd be curious to know if you do, because

966
00:47:05,640 --> 00:47:09,000
Speaker 3: once you're in it, it's like it spoils the magic

967
00:47:09,040 --> 00:47:11,200
Speaker 3: a little bit. I know too much now, and so

968
00:47:11,239 --> 00:47:14,920
Speaker 3: anytime I watch something, I'm like, I know what's going on.

969
00:47:15,280 --> 00:47:17,440
Speaker 3: Minus Traders. I do enjoy watching Traders.

970
00:47:18,320 --> 00:47:22,480
Speaker 2: Okay. So if you could be on Traders with one housewife,

971
00:47:22,600 --> 00:47:26,680
Speaker 2: oh my god, and you can't pick me, God, I

972
00:47:26,719 --> 00:47:27,640
Speaker 2: know you're dying too.

973
00:47:29,760 --> 00:47:32,000
Speaker 3: Oh my god. Okay, do you know the ones who've

974
00:47:32,000 --> 00:47:32,680
Speaker 3: already been on it?

975
00:47:33,400 --> 00:47:34,480
Speaker 2: Yes, I can correct you.

976
00:47:34,840 --> 00:47:36,800
Speaker 3: Well, can you tell me their names and I'll know

977
00:47:36,880 --> 00:47:39,160
Speaker 3: when you say it? Derenda?

978
00:47:40,719 --> 00:47:43,680
Speaker 2: Oh, I think she's coming back on it this season, right,

979
00:47:43,800 --> 00:47:46,480
Speaker 2: that makes sense? Yeah, she was amazing, she's coming back

980
00:47:46,520 --> 00:47:48,520
Speaker 2: on Yeah, dang, you missed it. So now you got

981
00:47:48,680 --> 00:47:50,480
Speaker 2: you got to pick somebody that hasn't been on it.

982
00:47:50,600 --> 00:47:52,359
Speaker 3: Maybe just keep bringing her back. I don't know. They

983
00:47:52,360 --> 00:47:54,399
Speaker 3: always choose a housewife though, So.

984
00:47:54,640 --> 00:47:59,480
Speaker 2: So you don't watch housewives? I don't any Bravo shows.

985
00:48:00,280 --> 00:48:03,399
Speaker 3: No, No, I don't. I to be honest, I actually

986
00:48:03,440 --> 00:48:05,400
Speaker 3: don't watch a lot of like TV or movies. And

987
00:48:05,440 --> 00:48:07,759
Speaker 3: my husband hates it because I can't even hold my

988
00:48:07,760 --> 00:48:10,240
Speaker 3: attention for like forty minutes into a movie.

989
00:48:10,520 --> 00:48:11,839
Speaker 2: So what do you do if you have a full

990
00:48:11,960 --> 00:48:12,520
Speaker 2: down day?

991
00:48:13,480 --> 00:48:16,440
Speaker 3: A doom scroll? Like, be honest, I'm just on social

992
00:48:16,480 --> 00:48:20,400
Speaker 3: media looking at cats, dougs. What is shopping? My phone

993
00:48:20,640 --> 00:48:24,359
Speaker 3: is my like lifeline to entertainment, and maybe that's what's

994
00:48:24,440 --> 00:48:26,480
Speaker 3: ruined me. Maybe that's why I can't watch TV because

995
00:48:26,880 --> 00:48:29,440
Speaker 3: even when I'm watching like reality TV, like I try

996
00:48:29,480 --> 00:48:31,520
Speaker 3: to watch Love Island for a bit, I'll still be

997
00:48:31,600 --> 00:48:33,400
Speaker 3: like half watching half on my phone.

998
00:48:33,800 --> 00:48:35,720
Speaker 2: Oh, I watch Love Island.

999
00:48:36,080 --> 00:48:39,520
Speaker 3: Okay. I do appreciate a one hour episode. And if

1000
00:48:39,560 --> 00:48:41,439
Speaker 3: you're if you're staying on top of it, it's it's

1001
00:48:41,440 --> 00:48:42,320
Speaker 3: pretty manageable.

1002
00:48:42,400 --> 00:48:46,160
Speaker 2: It's pretty manageable, except for then you miss a couple

1003
00:48:46,360 --> 00:48:48,839
Speaker 2: and then you're like, that's what happened. I couldn't do it.

1004
00:48:48,880 --> 00:48:50,359
Speaker 3: I was in Greece and I missed like a week,

1005
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:52,719
Speaker 3: which meant like five to six hours of show, like

1006
00:48:52,760 --> 00:48:54,880
Speaker 3: the show, and I was like, I can't do that anymore.

1007
00:48:54,920 --> 00:48:57,040
Speaker 2: No I have. Now I'm just going to watching like

1008
00:48:57,160 --> 00:48:59,960
Speaker 2: old shows. Well, I always you know, I watch Housewive

1009
00:49:00,160 --> 00:49:02,440
Speaker 2: because I recap it. Yeah, so I watch all the

1010
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:04,839
Speaker 2: different franchises there. But when it comes to other shows,

1011
00:49:04,880 --> 00:49:06,560
Speaker 2: I'm like, I gotta watch old shows. So I know

1012
00:49:06,640 --> 00:49:10,600
Speaker 2: I have like seven seasons. There's no rush. Yeah, but

1013
00:49:10,760 --> 00:49:12,279
Speaker 2: I'm trying to get into Yellowstone.

1014
00:49:12,760 --> 00:49:15,719
Speaker 3: I've heard great things. I just finished Handmaid's Tale, which

1015
00:49:15,719 --> 00:49:19,120
Speaker 3: is a little morbid, but I binged that that. I

1016
00:49:19,120 --> 00:49:20,520
Speaker 3: did enjoy that that series.

1017
00:49:20,600 --> 00:49:23,320
Speaker 2: Okay, so that'll be my next one. Did you watch Onreal?

1018
00:49:23,480 --> 00:49:26,920
Speaker 3: Okay? I watched a few episodes when I was fresh

1019
00:49:27,080 --> 00:49:31,600
Speaker 3: off the Bachelor, and it was actually so similar to

1020
00:49:31,880 --> 00:49:34,440
Speaker 3: what I experienced, minus like I don't know the murder

1021
00:49:34,520 --> 00:49:38,239
Speaker 3: or whatever that part. But I was like, oh, I

1022
00:49:38,440 --> 00:49:40,359
Speaker 3: couldn't watch it. And at that point I was new

1023
00:49:40,400 --> 00:49:42,200
Speaker 3: to reality TV and I was I was just a

1024
00:49:42,200 --> 00:49:44,839
Speaker 3: contestant on The Bachelor, so I didn't even fully experienced it.

1025
00:49:45,040 --> 00:49:47,680
Speaker 3: But I was like, I can't. I can't relive my

1026
00:49:47,760 --> 00:49:52,279
Speaker 3: trauma via scripted television. But it did pretty I think

1027
00:49:52,320 --> 00:49:54,759
Speaker 3: it was written by a producer that you used to

1028
00:49:54,800 --> 00:49:58,440
Speaker 3: be on the like, yeah, be on the show. So

1029
00:49:58,480 --> 00:49:58,759
Speaker 3: she did.

1030
00:49:58,719 --> 00:49:59,239
Speaker 4: A great job.

1031
00:49:59,680 --> 00:50:01,920
Speaker 2: And you never did Bachelor in Paradise. No.

1032
00:50:02,080 --> 00:50:05,320
Speaker 3: I showed up once as like a guest, a comedic guest,

1033
00:50:05,360 --> 00:50:10,759
Speaker 3: which was such a flop. But my ex fiance was

1034
00:50:10,840 --> 00:50:13,120
Speaker 3: on Bachelor in Paradise and that's of course why they

1035
00:50:13,120 --> 00:50:16,160
Speaker 3: then bring me in. And but I think I did

1036
00:50:16,200 --> 00:50:18,319
Speaker 3: it great because I I showed up and then I

1037
00:50:18,320 --> 00:50:19,879
Speaker 3: did my little part that I was supposed to, which

1038
00:50:19,880 --> 00:50:22,960
Speaker 3: was like a roast, plus the like you know, hey, Blake,

1039
00:50:23,000 --> 00:50:25,080
Speaker 3: how you've been? And then I was like, I.

1040
00:50:25,160 --> 00:50:26,520
Speaker 2: Hold on, I remember.

1041
00:50:28,480 --> 00:50:33,239
Speaker 3: The Canadian guy, the Canadian wildlife guy. Yeah, it's a

1042
00:50:33,280 --> 00:50:36,000
Speaker 3: great guy, but you know it didn't work out. Yeah,

1043
00:50:36,840 --> 00:50:39,840
Speaker 3: but he's still he's very supportive. Still, we both speak

1044
00:50:39,840 --> 00:50:42,040
Speaker 3: so highly of each other. And even seeing him on

1045
00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:45,600
Speaker 3: the beach in Paradise was fine. I think people was

1046
00:50:45,640 --> 00:50:47,560
Speaker 3: that weird. I'm like, this is how we met.

1047
00:50:47,600 --> 00:50:50,239
Speaker 2: I felt, it felt yeah. And also when it's done,

1048
00:50:50,239 --> 00:50:50,960
Speaker 2: it's done. Yeah.

1049
00:50:51,080 --> 00:50:52,720
Speaker 3: And then the produce so I was in my hotel

1050
00:50:52,719 --> 00:50:55,399
Speaker 3: and the preachure like what if you like came back

1051
00:50:55,440 --> 00:50:57,400
Speaker 3: and maybe because I was single at the time, like

1052
00:50:57,440 --> 00:50:58,960
Speaker 3: I don't know, what if you guys came back and

1053
00:50:59,000 --> 00:51:00,839
Speaker 3: I was like, nope, I didn't part. I showed up,

1054
00:51:00,880 --> 00:51:03,080
Speaker 3: I clocked in, I clocked out, clicked my paycheck, and

1055
00:51:03,120 --> 00:51:03,520
Speaker 3: I'm gone.

1056
00:51:03,719 --> 00:51:04,800
Speaker 2: You're like, I'm out. I'm not.

1057
00:51:04,840 --> 00:51:07,040
Speaker 3: I'm not playing into whatever storyline in this in this

1058
00:51:07,160 --> 00:51:10,640
Speaker 3: series anymore. So I did f Boy Island, though I

1059
00:51:10,640 --> 00:51:11,440
Speaker 3: don't know if you know that.

1060
00:51:11,680 --> 00:51:12,600
Speaker 2: Do I need to watch it?

1061
00:51:13,200 --> 00:51:13,279
Speaker 1: No?

1062
00:51:14,920 --> 00:51:17,200
Speaker 3: Sorry if any of my prettish are listening. But what

1063
00:51:17,239 --> 00:51:19,840
Speaker 3: I loved about it is there's a money element, like

1064
00:51:19,880 --> 00:51:22,520
Speaker 3: a prize element to it. And so in reality TV

1065
00:51:22,960 --> 00:51:26,799
Speaker 3: with American laws, if there's prize money, you can't produce

1066
00:51:28,320 --> 00:51:31,080
Speaker 3: like people because it impacts the outcome of like who wins,

1067
00:51:31,120 --> 00:51:33,719
Speaker 3: Like it's like cheating the system. And so it was

1068
00:51:33,960 --> 00:51:36,480
Speaker 3: way more fun to do f Boy Island because there

1069
00:51:36,520 --> 00:51:38,879
Speaker 3: was money, and so a producer like, go have fun,

1070
00:51:38,920 --> 00:51:41,359
Speaker 3: go play you know where it's like The Bachelor, it's

1071
00:51:41,360 --> 00:51:42,200
Speaker 3: a little more, you know.

1072
00:51:42,360 --> 00:51:44,480
Speaker 2: And how long does the f Boy Island film for?

1073
00:51:44,760 --> 00:51:47,200
Speaker 3: I think it was also like maybe three weeks?

1074
00:51:47,480 --> 00:51:50,360
Speaker 2: Three weeks, yeah, And then how long is the Bachelor

1075
00:51:50,400 --> 00:51:51,480
Speaker 2: and the Bachelor Atte film for?

1076
00:51:51,719 --> 00:51:54,080
Speaker 3: I think it was like six weeks, but we were

1077
00:51:54,280 --> 00:51:56,160
Speaker 3: it was COVID season, so I feel like I think

1078
00:51:56,239 --> 00:51:58,160
Speaker 3: it might normally be like eight weeks, but because it

1079
00:51:58,160 --> 00:52:01,000
Speaker 3: was COVID and there was no trap fast when you

1080
00:52:01,080 --> 00:52:04,080
Speaker 3: really think about it, and might I add you, actually

1081
00:52:04,200 --> 00:52:06,319
Speaker 3: it's six weeks total, But that doesn't mean I spent

1082
00:52:06,400 --> 00:52:08,440
Speaker 3: six weeks with the guy I got engaged to. I

1083
00:52:08,520 --> 00:52:12,680
Speaker 3: probably spent combined over that six weeks twenty four hours.

1084
00:52:12,680 --> 00:52:14,640
Speaker 3: And that's just me rounding up with the guy I

1085
00:52:14,640 --> 00:52:16,640
Speaker 3: got engaged to. It was a cool u of like

1086
00:52:16,760 --> 00:52:17,560
Speaker 3: one to two dates.

1087
00:52:17,560 --> 00:52:20,080
Speaker 2: Maybe how many people did you bring into the what

1088
00:52:20,520 --> 00:52:22,240
Speaker 2: fantasy suite? The fantasy suite?

1089
00:52:22,680 --> 00:52:29,480
Speaker 3: Mine was a weird season because like two guys basically left,

1090
00:52:29,520 --> 00:52:32,799
Speaker 3: which is how embarrassing for me as the lead? Like,

1091
00:52:32,800 --> 00:52:36,040
Speaker 3: oh shit? And then the two guys I had left

1092
00:52:36,080 --> 00:52:39,600
Speaker 3: one love you justin, but like he was never going

1093
00:52:39,640 --> 00:52:42,520
Speaker 3: to be in that overnight situation, and so I like

1094
00:52:42,600 --> 00:52:46,400
Speaker 3: let him go before the overnight situation. The fantasy suite,

1095
00:52:46,400 --> 00:52:48,400
Speaker 3: I should call it, And so I had one and

1096
00:52:48,440 --> 00:52:53,120
Speaker 3: it was it was Blake. It was Blake. Yeah.

1097
00:52:53,320 --> 00:52:56,799
Speaker 2: Yeah. So after you finished The Bachelor, how did it

1098
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:59,759
Speaker 2: come about that you want to become the bachelorette or

1099
00:52:59,800 --> 00:53:02,000
Speaker 2: did you just kind of fell in your lap and

1100
00:53:02,000 --> 00:53:03,080
Speaker 2: then you were like I gotta do this.

1101
00:53:03,280 --> 00:53:05,200
Speaker 3: Well I don't know if you're like familiar with it,

1102
00:53:05,239 --> 00:53:08,719
Speaker 3: but typically like the top four are the girls considered,

1103
00:53:08,800 --> 00:53:11,480
Speaker 3: and I, if we're talking like a ranking, was eleventh place.

1104
00:53:11,719 --> 00:53:14,279
Speaker 3: So I thought, at best I would get invited to

1105
00:53:14,320 --> 00:53:16,319
Speaker 3: Paradise and I probably wasn't gonna go. I was gonna

1106
00:53:16,320 --> 00:53:18,520
Speaker 3: go back to my bank job. I was like, nah, whatever,

1107
00:53:18,520 --> 00:53:20,000
Speaker 3: I did it. I did my thing. It was fun.

1108
00:53:20,080 --> 00:53:23,040
Speaker 3: I'm out. But when I got off the show, the

1109
00:53:23,200 --> 00:53:26,840
Speaker 3: producers were like, hey, just like stay single. You know,

1110
00:53:27,000 --> 00:53:29,239
Speaker 3: they don't because it's not a guarantee, you know, but

1111
00:53:29,400 --> 00:53:32,239
Speaker 3: you know you're up against some other women with like

1112
00:53:32,320 --> 00:53:36,480
Speaker 3: interviews and I think audience reactions too, and so to

1113
00:53:36,560 --> 00:53:39,800
Speaker 3: be honest, I was I was not expecting to become

1114
00:53:39,800 --> 00:53:43,760
Speaker 3: the Bachelorette, given like the ten other women quote ahead

1115
00:53:43,800 --> 00:53:46,400
Speaker 3: of me who were just like so beautiful and so

1116
00:53:46,520 --> 00:53:49,400
Speaker 3: worthy of being the bachelorette. And also my season with

1117
00:53:49,440 --> 00:53:51,840
Speaker 3: Matt James, he was the first black bachelor, So it

1118
00:53:51,880 --> 00:53:55,400
Speaker 3: was such a conversation about like people of color, and

1119
00:53:55,440 --> 00:53:58,440
Speaker 3: so to pick like eleventh place White Girl, and then

1120
00:53:58,560 --> 00:54:00,440
Speaker 3: Chris Harrison had just been fired, it was like it

1121
00:54:00,480 --> 00:54:03,239
Speaker 3: was a whole thing. It was a whole mess. And

1122
00:54:03,280 --> 00:54:06,279
Speaker 3: so when I was asked, it was like, like how

1123
00:54:06,320 --> 00:54:09,319
Speaker 3: could I say no? Like it's such a great opportunity,

1124
00:54:09,520 --> 00:54:12,640
Speaker 3: but it was not like welcomed fully because it was

1125
00:54:12,719 --> 00:54:16,560
Speaker 3: such a shocking pick as like eleventh place White Girl.

1126
00:54:17,200 --> 00:54:20,640
Speaker 3: So but of course I like, selfishly, I'm like you,

1127
00:54:20,840 --> 00:54:22,560
Speaker 3: I'm gonna say yes. I'm not going to turn it

1128
00:54:22,600 --> 00:54:25,000
Speaker 3: down because the franchise had thirty years of missteps that

1129
00:54:25,040 --> 00:54:27,120
Speaker 3: I have to like help them look good, you know,

1130
00:54:27,200 --> 00:54:29,040
Speaker 3: like I'm going to say yes to my opportunity. It's

1131
00:54:29,080 --> 00:54:31,279
Speaker 3: not my fault the show took this whole time to

1132
00:54:31,280 --> 00:54:35,120
Speaker 3: have their first black Bachelor, you know. So, yeah, I

1133
00:54:35,160 --> 00:54:38,319
Speaker 3: was surprised I was picked. I think they were hoping for, like,

1134
00:54:38,960 --> 00:54:42,280
Speaker 3: I don't know, some like progressive audience to come through,

1135
00:54:42,600 --> 00:54:44,960
Speaker 3: because the Bachelor really is like the Bible Belt. It's

1136
00:54:45,040 --> 00:54:48,239
Speaker 3: very like crazy enough conservative audience. But then it's like,

1137
00:54:48,600 --> 00:54:50,880
Speaker 3: but the girl has three overnight dates and gets marri

1138
00:54:51,000 --> 00:54:53,520
Speaker 3: like engaged in like three days, you know, yeah, like you,

1139
00:54:53,760 --> 00:54:57,839
Speaker 3: we'll pick your lane. So when I did it, it

1140
00:54:57,880 --> 00:55:00,360
Speaker 3: was like you either like loved me or you hate me.

1141
00:55:00,480 --> 00:55:02,840
Speaker 3: And so I still experienced that to this day.

1142
00:55:03,200 --> 00:55:03,560
Speaker 2: Me too.

1143
00:55:03,800 --> 00:55:06,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, you got to be polarized to be remembered, so

1144
00:55:07,120 --> 00:55:07,680
Speaker 3: love me or.

1145
00:55:07,560 --> 00:55:09,440
Speaker 2: You hate me. Well, thank you so much for joining us.

1146
00:55:09,520 --> 00:55:12,720
Speaker 2: We really appreciate it. And if people want to follow

1147
00:55:12,719 --> 00:55:14,560
Speaker 2: you so they can continue on with your story, where

1148
00:55:14,560 --> 00:55:15,040
Speaker 2: do they do? So?

1149
00:55:15,280 --> 00:55:18,319
Speaker 3: Instagram is probably my go to and it's at the

1150
00:55:18,480 --> 00:55:19,640
Speaker 3: Katie Thurston.

1151
00:55:19,600 --> 00:55:21,279
Speaker 2: At the Katie Thurston follow her.

1152
00:55:21,680 --> 00:55:22,080
Speaker 4: Thanks