WEBVTT - Career Crossroads 0:00:01.920 --> 0:00:05.359 Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast. 0:00:05.920 --> 0:00:09.680 Okay, so last week was interesting. A lot of stuff 0:00:09.720 --> 0:00:14.560 came out in the press. I feel like wide this 0:00:14.600 --> 0:00:17.240 one girl DM me. She's like, can y'all just stop 0:00:17.920 --> 0:00:20.960 talking about things that the press will grab because I'm 0:00:20.960 --> 0:00:24.119 so sick of defending y'all. And I was like, I'm 0:00:24.120 --> 0:00:26.760 so sorry, I know, but I'm just like, our podcast 0:00:26.800 --> 0:00:29.080 is about relationships and I just feel like it's important to, 0:00:29.800 --> 0:00:32.560 you know, talk about things that come up and ways 0:00:32.560 --> 0:00:34.559 that we handle it. And she was just she's like, no, 0:00:34.640 --> 0:00:37.479 I totally get it. She's like, it's just the people 0:00:37.520 --> 0:00:39.760 that I don't know us just kind of read a 0:00:39.760 --> 0:00:42.280 headline and when they hear like oh Mike cheated again, 0:00:42.920 --> 0:00:47.480 they don't actually click on it to read to read 0:00:47.479 --> 0:00:49.839 the article the article. So it's you know, I had 0:00:49.840 --> 0:00:50.880 a few people reach out. 0:00:52.240 --> 0:00:55.319 Did you have any like friends reach out? 0:00:55.880 --> 0:00:58.560 I had an old sister in law reach out, and 0:00:58.600 --> 0:01:01.400 then I had I had two people just check in 0:01:01.440 --> 0:01:03.840 with me and say, is everything okay? I heard the 0:01:03.840 --> 0:01:06.119 news or I saw an article wanted to make sure 0:01:06.120 --> 0:01:09.399 it wasn't true, And I was like, oh, it's like, 0:01:10.560 --> 0:01:12.880 you know, people, are you know also will say, well, 0:01:13.240 --> 0:01:15.240 you know, we're just trying to get attention, or you know, 0:01:15.280 --> 0:01:17.880 they'll say like enough of them already, like this is 0:01:17.959 --> 0:01:19.960 just all for money and all for show, and. 0:01:20.440 --> 0:01:24.319 Where's the money, show me the show me the money. 0:01:24.319 --> 0:01:25.160 If it's all about the. 0:01:25.200 --> 0:01:28.199 Money, I think it's just one of those things where 0:01:29.160 --> 0:01:30.960 you know, we've and it's kind of the same thing 0:01:30.959 --> 0:01:33.199 when people ask us about our book, like why why 0:01:33.240 --> 0:01:36.800 do we talk about all this stuff? And you know, 0:01:36.920 --> 0:01:40.560 it's we know that it's helping people. We know that 0:01:40.600 --> 0:01:44.559 there's certain things that we talk about that it helps people, 0:01:44.640 --> 0:01:48.840 and that group of people we are doing this for 0:01:49.240 --> 0:01:51.160 because the other people aren't going to get us. They're 0:01:51.160 --> 0:01:53.680 not going to like us, they haven't liked us, they'll 0:01:53.720 --> 0:01:57.560 never like us. And I'm kind of just I'm now 0:01:57.640 --> 0:01:59.840 just okay with it. Yeah, And usually I feel like 0:01:59.880 --> 0:02:02.720 I would come to the defense or be like no, no, no, 0:02:02.720 --> 0:02:05.200 no no, but it's like whatever, they're gonna believe what 0:02:05.200 --> 0:02:08.200 they're going to believe. We know our truth, we know 0:02:08.480 --> 0:02:11.440 our story, and it's kind of it is what it is. 0:02:11.880 --> 0:02:14.200 But we are excited to get Shari. She's been on 0:02:14.240 --> 0:02:16.280 our show before. She's kind of like an all in 0:02:16.320 --> 0:02:21.200 one thing from life coach therapist. She's just motivator, motivator, 0:02:21.320 --> 0:02:23.520 So we're gonna get her on the show. I'm really 0:02:23.560 --> 0:02:26.120 excited to talk to her again because it's been a while. 0:02:27.360 --> 0:02:29.720 And yeah, I don't know. I mean, how do you 0:02:29.720 --> 0:02:30.760 feel about everything? Bebe? 0:02:31.240 --> 0:02:32.959 I mean, it's one of those things you kind of 0:02:33.000 --> 0:02:35.800 hit it all on the head. It's at this point 0:02:36.280 --> 0:02:41.680 I am getting better at not paying attention to any 0:02:41.760 --> 0:02:44.960 of that kind of noise. And it's just like, okay, 0:02:45.160 --> 0:02:48.160 because we just know the truth and I'm farther out 0:02:48.200 --> 0:02:52.519 of my shame. We're closer together with our connection and 0:02:53.520 --> 0:02:59.000 trust on things. So just people are clickbait man. People 0:02:59.040 --> 0:03:02.520 are gonna see things, and unfortunately people are drawn to 0:03:02.600 --> 0:03:06.560 negative news rather than positive. I feel like, so, I mean, 0:03:06.680 --> 0:03:08.720 it is what it is. People can think what they want, 0:03:08.800 --> 0:03:11.519 and even before stuff like this comes out, people still say, 0:03:11.720 --> 0:03:12.799 I give them five years. 0:03:12.800 --> 0:03:16.840 She's gonna yeah, pres Hilton goes, I see Chloe, I 0:03:16.880 --> 0:03:20.359 see like this is Chloe and interest in two years. 0:03:20.360 --> 0:03:20.960 I'm calling it. 0:03:21.240 --> 0:03:22.120 Oh geez. 0:03:23.240 --> 0:03:27.360 But I don't know, do you have any regrets because 0:03:27.400 --> 0:03:29.320 of the things that come out and that we do 0:03:29.400 --> 0:03:34.639 talk about about sharing so publicly about everything. 0:03:35.840 --> 0:03:39.720 I mean, yes and no, sure would be great just 0:03:39.760 --> 0:03:43.480 to live our private life, our personal life privately and 0:03:43.520 --> 0:03:49.200 not worry about all these people having opinions, whether positive 0:03:49.280 --> 0:03:53.600 or negative, and you know, people writing articles that aren't 0:03:53.600 --> 0:03:58.560 true or make creating headlines that just for attention or clickbait. 0:03:58.880 --> 0:04:02.280 I mean, yeah, that gets old and it gets frustrating 0:04:02.400 --> 0:04:05.440 when it's about your personal life. But on the other hand, 0:04:06.400 --> 0:04:09.800 the people that we've connected with and the people that 0:04:09.880 --> 0:04:13.160 have reached out to us and the people close to us, 0:04:14.040 --> 0:04:20.599 the benefit that we see firsthand from what we've talked about, 0:04:20.640 --> 0:04:26.599 what we've shared completely outweighs the negative. You know, the 0:04:26.640 --> 0:04:29.200 fact that, like the guy that I had lunch with 0:04:30.080 --> 0:04:32.640 a week or so ago, and just for people being 0:04:32.680 --> 0:04:37.720 willing to open up to me man a man about things, 0:04:38.240 --> 0:04:40.200 I'm like, this is why we did it for me. 0:04:40.600 --> 0:04:46.960 I was like, this is more connectedness than I could 0:04:47.000 --> 0:04:50.760 ever think of from a someone who was a stranger. 0:04:51.400 --> 0:04:53.839 So again, the fact, I mean, you've seen the amount 0:04:53.880 --> 0:04:56.640 of people that have and men that have opened up 0:04:56.680 --> 0:04:59.680 to me or to us, or couples that have opened 0:04:59.720 --> 0:05:01.920 up to us around this stuff. So it's just that 0:05:01.960 --> 0:05:03.760 outweighs all the negative for me. 0:05:04.240 --> 0:05:05.400 Yeah, that's good. 0:05:05.839 --> 0:05:06.400 Yeah. 0:05:06.480 --> 0:05:09.600 Okay, Well, we have Chari in the waiting room right now, 0:05:09.680 --> 0:05:13.280 so let's get her in and chat about all things 0:05:13.320 --> 0:05:27.919 twenty twenty in relationships. Hey, Schari, how are you? 0:05:27.960 --> 0:05:29.039 Oh? 0:05:29.160 --> 0:05:31.479 Wo hey, it's great to see you guys. 0:05:31.560 --> 0:05:34.559 Good to see all too. Okay, Sure, how has twenty 0:05:34.600 --> 0:05:35.320 twenty been for you? 0:05:36.440 --> 0:05:39.040 Oh? Boy? It has been like surfing. 0:05:39.240 --> 0:05:42.599 Yeah, especially with your you know, your background, because your life, coach, therapist, 0:05:42.640 --> 0:05:45.560 kind of all in one everything. So has it just 0:05:45.640 --> 0:05:46.440 been exploding? 0:05:47.360 --> 0:05:50.480 Yeah? Yeah, I think I think we. I have been 0:05:50.520 --> 0:05:52.360 saying to the people who do the work that I do, 0:05:52.480 --> 0:05:54.960 like we were made for these times. We clearly have 0:05:55.040 --> 0:05:59.719 been preparing for this moment because it's been a rocky 0:05:59.800 --> 0:06:01.960 ride for me, and I've got a lot of tools, 0:06:02.120 --> 0:06:06.599 you know, So I feel like I am hopeful that 0:06:07.640 --> 0:06:11.880 these waves are making us do the inner work. 0:06:12.560 --> 0:06:16.120 Everybody, when you say that, you know you've obviously, because 0:06:16.279 --> 0:06:19.080 we've all experienced twenty twenty and had our own challenges 0:06:19.120 --> 0:06:21.839 along the way. For someone who is supposed to be 0:06:21.960 --> 0:06:29.680 so uplifting and encouraging and helpful when you face your 0:06:29.720 --> 0:06:31.919 own kind of inner demons, because I know sometimes with 0:06:31.960 --> 0:06:35.520 Mike and I when we aren't communicating good, but I'm like, 0:06:35.560 --> 0:06:38.000 but we wrote about it and we say to do this, 0:06:38.120 --> 0:06:40.800 but we're not doing it. And but then with you too, 0:06:40.839 --> 0:06:43.039 where it's like, if you feel depressed and you don't 0:06:43.080 --> 0:06:45.320 know how to lift yourself up, do you kind of 0:06:45.640 --> 0:06:47.360 get more harder on yourself? 0:06:48.400 --> 0:06:50.960 Oh? For sure there are times. Well I would say 0:06:50.960 --> 0:06:52.920 more when I was a little younger, because I think 0:06:52.960 --> 0:06:55.000 I've been around the block now long enough to know 0:06:55.120 --> 0:06:59.040 that we have to be working our own wisdom, our 0:06:59.080 --> 0:07:02.920 own tools always. And I'm really clear about that with people. 0:07:03.400 --> 0:07:07.160 I may be, you know, a couple steps ahead sometimes 0:07:07.200 --> 0:07:10.400 than somebody else, or have been through, you know, a 0:07:10.440 --> 0:07:14.240 particular challenge and use the tools more. But anybody who 0:07:14.280 --> 0:07:16.960 says that they've got it all dialed, you know, who 0:07:17.960 --> 0:07:20.640 don't use their own walk, their own talk, you know 0:07:20.680 --> 0:07:24.880 that I'd be a little bit cautious about, you know 0:07:25.240 --> 0:07:28.160 for sure. And so I think what I know I 0:07:28.240 --> 0:07:31.680 need is perspective. I need. I need my people. You 0:07:31.680 --> 0:07:33.720 can have all the tools in the world, but it's 0:07:33.760 --> 0:07:37.200 sometimes very hard to do it alone. And so this 0:07:37.200 --> 0:07:41.920 this time has had me just really nurture relationships and 0:07:41.920 --> 0:07:46.320 spend more time you know, on the lovely screen, right 0:07:46.560 --> 0:07:50.680 Unfortunately with the people that root me, who you know, 0:07:51.040 --> 0:07:54.360 reflect back to me my own humanity and make it easier, 0:07:54.640 --> 0:07:56.640 because yeah, I think we all go a little bit 0:07:56.680 --> 0:07:59.760 crazy for sort of in our own heads trying to 0:07:59.760 --> 0:08:01.160 be perfect at all this. 0:08:01.800 --> 0:08:04.080 I think that's a great point for you know, I 0:08:04.160 --> 0:08:06.600 make up. I know I'm this way is try to 0:08:06.680 --> 0:08:10.120 do so many things on my own right when it's 0:08:10.160 --> 0:08:12.760 like we don't have to, you know, and so many 0:08:12.760 --> 0:08:14.920 people want to just struggle, like no one's gotten to 0:08:14.920 --> 0:08:18.240 where they've gotten without help, you know, and whether it's 0:08:18.360 --> 0:08:21.800 directly or indirectly, So especially in these times, I think 0:08:21.840 --> 0:08:23.680 that's a great point for our listeners to kind of 0:08:24.000 --> 0:08:27.440 hold on to and sure it. You know, you're also 0:08:27.680 --> 0:08:29.800 titled as a let me see if I can say 0:08:29.800 --> 0:08:38.240 it correctly possibilitarian. Yeah yeah, but she said, can you 0:08:38.280 --> 0:08:40.880 can you give myself and our listeners kind of a 0:08:41.360 --> 0:08:44.839 synopsis of what that that you know, what that title means. 0:08:45.520 --> 0:08:48.079 Yeah, I mean I'm technically called like the founder of 0:08:48.120 --> 0:08:51.200 the Luminaries or a board certified coach, all those you know, 0:08:51.679 --> 0:08:57.240 titles that feel more traditional, But I think the possibilitarian 0:08:57.280 --> 0:08:59.560 title came in at a certain point where I just said, 0:08:59.600 --> 0:09:02.280 look at the bottom of the bottom line the end 0:09:02.280 --> 0:09:05.080 of the day. I am here to do what I 0:09:05.120 --> 0:09:08.839 do because I believe that anything is possible. I will 0:09:08.840 --> 0:09:11.040 stop at nothing to get you what you want and 0:09:11.559 --> 0:09:15.440 to answer the big questions that I think people get 0:09:15.640 --> 0:09:17.560 stuck with in life, like who am I and what 0:09:17.640 --> 0:09:20.920 am I here to do? The big questions? And I 0:09:20.960 --> 0:09:25.560 think ultimately we are infinitely free and powerful beyond our understanding, 0:09:25.600 --> 0:09:28.640 and we're not told that by our culture, by our 0:09:28.679 --> 0:09:33.120 parents unless we're really lucky. And my job is to 0:09:33.120 --> 0:09:35.360 come in and hold up like a big mirror and 0:09:35.480 --> 0:09:40.280 just be like, look, you are the universe. You are everything, 0:09:40.640 --> 0:09:44.520 and you are capable of everything. It's just maybe that 0:09:44.600 --> 0:09:47.320 you don't believe that or you don't exactly know how 0:09:47.960 --> 0:09:51.160 to go about it. And that's where I come in. 0:09:51.320 --> 0:09:56.160 I think I have just a weird way of getting 0:09:56.280 --> 0:10:00.439 just creative enough to overcome any obstacle. 0:10:00.760 --> 0:10:04.560 You know on that topic is there, you know, because 0:10:04.600 --> 0:10:08.440 I understand just from talking to people, friends, family, whatever, 0:10:08.679 --> 0:10:10.319 you know. I feel like everyone at some point in 0:10:10.320 --> 0:10:13.280 their life has a crossroads where it's like should I 0:10:13.320 --> 0:10:15.079 stay in the career, the job that I'm in, or 0:10:15.120 --> 0:10:18.520 should I take this unknown leap into something completely different 0:10:18.679 --> 0:10:21.040 or new that you know someone has an opportunity in. 0:10:21.760 --> 0:10:24.480 Is there ever a time that you've worked with somebody 0:10:24.520 --> 0:10:27.040 that you're like, no, don't take that chance. 0:10:28.360 --> 0:10:34.600 Hmm wow, No, probably not what I and I never 0:10:34.679 --> 0:10:37.760 even look at crossroads like that as binary, like there's 0:10:37.800 --> 0:10:40.200 a black or a white, a right or wrong. There's 0:10:40.200 --> 0:10:44.160 always a multitude for sure of ways. Right. So let's say, 0:10:44.200 --> 0:10:46.400 the only thing that I can think about in a 0:10:46.480 --> 0:10:49.880 particular scenario like that where I would advise somebody to 0:10:50.040 --> 0:10:54.200 wait a minute, would be if taking the leap caused 0:10:55.160 --> 0:10:59.120 enormous amounts of stress financially, you know, if it would 0:10:59.160 --> 0:11:02.920 put if it would cause harm anxiety in a way 0:11:02.920 --> 0:11:06.840 that was unbearable, then I would say, let's stay with 0:11:07.000 --> 0:11:09.480 enough certainty at the current job or in the current 0:11:09.559 --> 0:11:12.960 relationship to continue to figure out what the next move is, 0:11:13.800 --> 0:11:17.120 to plot out, you know, and be in kind of 0:11:17.120 --> 0:11:20.360 a hybrid scenario where we use the certainty and the 0:11:20.400 --> 0:11:25.320 safety of the current situation to strategize what next and 0:11:25.400 --> 0:11:28.320 not make it immediately. Because that that's true for some people. 0:11:28.360 --> 0:11:30.320 You know they can't give out like the golden handcuffs 0:11:30.320 --> 0:11:32.480 at the great check, the paycheck whatever to go for 0:11:32.520 --> 0:11:35.920 the dream job. But no, I mean that life is short. 0:11:36.240 --> 0:11:39.640 I will always help people live the dream. 0:11:40.960 --> 0:11:43.920 What if it's one of those things though, where you 0:11:43.920 --> 0:11:46.440 know they want to be a singer but their tone deaf, 0:11:47.200 --> 0:11:49.800 you know where it's like. 0:11:51.400 --> 0:11:53.439 That's where you ain't got it, sister. 0:11:53.280 --> 0:11:58.439 Sorry, like you do you kind of go well, maybe 0:11:58.600 --> 0:12:00.800 you should, you know, it's like, how do you when 0:12:00.880 --> 0:12:03.720 it's like, because there are there has to be those 0:12:03.760 --> 0:12:05.320 because I'm like, I have to think that we're going 0:12:05.400 --> 0:12:09.080 to be those parents that not discourage. But if we're like, hey, honey, 0:12:09.160 --> 0:12:12.080 like you're tone deaf, let's try to get maybe lessons, 0:12:12.200 --> 0:12:15.240 but you know, do you want to try soccer or 0:12:16.120 --> 0:12:18.079 you know, like how do you do that when you're 0:12:18.120 --> 0:12:20.760 just like, ah, that's tough because I don't know how 0:12:20.760 --> 0:12:22.679 many people that can get over being tone deaf. I 0:12:22.720 --> 0:12:23.079 don't know. 0:12:24.320 --> 0:12:26.839 But see that's where maybe the possibilitarian and me kicks 0:12:26.840 --> 0:12:28.640 in because I'm like, all right, well, we just need 0:12:28.679 --> 0:12:30.120 to go to the top, you know, we need to 0:12:30.120 --> 0:12:34.000 find the person who will absolutely crack you open and 0:12:34.200 --> 0:12:36.760 you'll have that experience. Now what if that I mean, 0:12:37.120 --> 0:12:39.640 I don't know, if the person didn't like make it, 0:12:39.760 --> 0:12:42.040 you know at the full time gate go professional, because 0:12:42.040 --> 0:12:44.480 we know that career is a hard one. They should 0:12:44.559 --> 0:12:47.280 still sing all the goddamn time. I would be like, 0:12:47.360 --> 0:12:49.640 you need to go karaoke, you need to have a band, 0:12:49.720 --> 0:12:51.240 you need to have friends over. Really you need to 0:12:51.320 --> 0:12:55.839 do all that because clearly, I believe if we have desires, 0:12:57.040 --> 0:13:00.000 even if they're not matched with talent, the desires are 0:13:00.080 --> 0:13:03.120 and us for a reason, they're they're pointing us in 0:13:03.160 --> 0:13:05.840 the direction of the life we're supposed to have. So 0:13:06.120 --> 0:13:10.840 I would say, you know, follow that joy in whatever way. 0:13:10.880 --> 0:13:13.560 But yeah, there is refinement. So if they were help 0:13:13.600 --> 0:13:16.080 on being a professional, then we would scale up. 0:13:16.840 --> 0:13:19.800 So is there in your experience have you worked with 0:13:19.880 --> 0:13:22.280 someone that maybe it's not as black and white like that, 0:13:22.360 --> 0:13:25.199 like either you can sing, you can't, but maybe someone 0:13:25.240 --> 0:13:27.719 wants to get go into a certain direction in the 0:13:28.640 --> 0:13:31.959 does any realistic part of you come out and be like, hmm, 0:13:32.600 --> 0:13:34.440 just knowing what you know about them, it might not 0:13:34.520 --> 0:13:37.040 be the best and you steer them maybe in a 0:13:37.120 --> 0:13:40.720 similar but different direction. I don't know, you know, how 0:13:40.720 --> 0:13:41.160 you get. 0:13:41.400 --> 0:13:44.000 There's the whole discovery process that I go through where 0:13:44.000 --> 0:13:47.720 I dig deep into someone's soul, you know, really through 0:13:47.760 --> 0:13:50.520 a process of asking great questions and opening up this 0:13:50.640 --> 0:13:55.200 kind of liminal space to just remember what you already know. 0:13:55.559 --> 0:13:57.240 Can we try that right now? Can you do that 0:13:57.280 --> 0:13:57.640 with Mike? 0:13:58.480 --> 0:14:01.600 Yeah, we don't. We can start it. I mean it 0:14:01.720 --> 0:14:03.920 takes some time, you know, let's. 0:14:03.720 --> 0:14:08.920 Dig deep in that soul, baby, but I feel like 0:14:09.000 --> 0:14:11.160 he needs we need to dig deep in this one. 0:14:12.000 --> 0:14:13.319 Let's just try. Can we try? 0:14:14.040 --> 0:14:16.240 Are you at a career crossroads? Is that what we're 0:14:16.240 --> 0:14:16.720 looking at? 0:14:18.920 --> 0:14:19.120 Why? 0:14:19.800 --> 0:14:20.880 I don't know? You tell me. 0:14:22.400 --> 0:14:24.640 I think Janna just wants to keep me busy. 0:14:26.320 --> 0:14:28.720 Do you do you say sometimes that you don't. You 0:14:29.080 --> 0:14:36.560 might question your my what you're go get them? So 0:14:36.640 --> 0:14:38.640 maybe it's not because maybe that means you're not passionate 0:14:38.680 --> 0:14:38.960 in it. 0:14:40.840 --> 0:14:45.960 I think. Okay, So for me, I came from a 0:14:46.080 --> 0:14:49.360 career that was everything was scheduled for me. I was 0:14:49.440 --> 0:14:53.440 regimented every I mean every hour, every minute, every day. 0:14:54.760 --> 0:14:58.040 And then when I transitioned out, I mean that was 0:14:58.080 --> 0:15:01.000 my entire life with athletics and you know, in college 0:15:01.040 --> 0:15:04.760 and professionally and then getting out of that. You know, 0:15:04.800 --> 0:15:07.720 there was a challenge trying to find that. I think 0:15:07.800 --> 0:15:10.880 now it's still I mean, Jane and I do a 0:15:10.880 --> 0:15:12.920 lot of things together. Obviously we do this, We had 0:15:12.920 --> 0:15:15.040 the book. You know, there's other projects we want to 0:15:15.080 --> 0:15:20.640 work on, both together and individually, but there's don't I 0:15:20.640 --> 0:15:22.520 don't know if I have that thing right now that 0:15:22.720 --> 0:15:25.760 I wake up every morning that motivates me to work on, 0:15:27.280 --> 0:15:29.080 you know what I mean. I'm not waking up like Jana. 0:15:29.560 --> 0:15:33.000 She's a creator. It's unbelievable she I think it's like 0:15:33.080 --> 0:15:34.960 every other day she throws an id at me and 0:15:34.960 --> 0:15:36.640 she's like, would this begun on Shark Tank? And then 0:15:36.680 --> 0:15:40.000 just lets it out, you know what I mean, Like yeah, 0:15:40.040 --> 0:15:42.280 and I feel bad because I'm the realist and I 0:15:42.360 --> 0:15:44.480 just have to like shut it down. I'll negate it 0:15:44.520 --> 0:15:46.680 with something well that already exists or this would happen 0:15:46.840 --> 0:15:50.560 or whatever. She's the dreamer and I love her for it. 0:15:50.840 --> 0:15:54.000 And you know, I feel bad sometimes because I don't 0:15:54.000 --> 0:15:57.560 have that imagination or that creativeness as much as she does. 0:15:58.320 --> 0:16:01.720 And I'll say too, because there are things that I 0:16:01.720 --> 0:16:05.640 want to do with him. I don't get that and 0:16:05.840 --> 0:16:08.040 like that energy from him. So in my mind, I'm like, 0:16:08.120 --> 0:16:11.080 all right, he clearly doesn't want to do this because 0:16:11.120 --> 0:16:14.400 he's not following up with it. I've said it ten times, 0:16:14.440 --> 0:16:17.400 and I mean, so I have that. Okay, Well I'm 0:16:17.400 --> 0:16:19.960 gonna then veer a different way and go a different 0:16:19.960 --> 0:16:21.880 way because I don't think he's passionate about that. And 0:16:21.920 --> 0:16:24.440 that's fine, but I just wish he would tell me 0:16:24.600 --> 0:16:28.440 kind of. I guess it's like the drive is like 0:16:28.480 --> 0:16:31.560 you're missing, which makes me I make up that you 0:16:32.200 --> 0:16:35.920 might not be passionate about it, and so it's like 0:16:35.960 --> 0:16:38.360 where where do we Where do we ignite the drive? 0:16:38.440 --> 0:16:40.200 Like how can we find something that does ignite you 0:16:40.240 --> 0:16:43.360 that you do get excited about instead of just like 0:16:43.720 --> 0:16:45.240 we have to go in the office and write, you know, 0:16:46.720 --> 0:16:47.400 or do something. 0:16:47.480 --> 0:16:48.880 Oh the book? 0:16:48.960 --> 0:16:51.000 Oh no, no, I know you were, but again it 0:16:51.040 --> 0:16:54.920 took flight to the fire and that stresses me out. 0:16:54.960 --> 0:16:57.160 So dealing with I'm like, this is our schedule. Let's 0:16:57.160 --> 0:16:58.800 do it, like this week we do this, and this 0:16:58.840 --> 0:17:00.760 week we edit and this new work, this chapter and 0:17:00.800 --> 0:17:03.080 it was like two months left, and I'm like, what 0:17:03.160 --> 0:17:05.520 do you do? Like we gotta go man like and 0:17:05.520 --> 0:17:07.639 then he's like and He's like, now I'll work and 0:17:07.680 --> 0:17:11.400 I'm like, huh. 0:17:09.760 --> 0:17:11.520 Yeah, why did you say, Mike, you worked better on 0:17:11.600 --> 0:17:14.840 what under pressure? Under pressure? Well? Yeah, this is what 0:17:14.880 --> 0:17:16.679 I want to go back to, is when when you 0:17:16.760 --> 0:17:19.000 were highly scheduled did you love that? 0:17:22.640 --> 0:17:25.840 Yeah? Because I knew what my day looked like. There 0:17:25.920 --> 0:17:28.960 wasn't any plan. It was just he got me out 0:17:28.960 --> 0:17:33.200 of my own way of justifying rationalizing. Nah, I do 0:17:33.280 --> 0:17:36.240 it later. Oh, I'll do it you know tomorrow. Oh 0:17:36.280 --> 0:17:38.520 it's not that important and it's my job and I'll 0:17:38.560 --> 0:17:41.200 get fined if I didn't go. So you know that 0:17:41.200 --> 0:17:42.840 that helped motivate me as well. 0:17:42.920 --> 0:17:47.480 But yeah, yeah, yeah, So there are a couple of 0:17:47.520 --> 0:17:49.800 things coming up for me that you know, when I 0:17:49.840 --> 0:17:52.919 when I talk about ultimate career strategy with people like 0:17:52.960 --> 0:17:55.800 what would have you be? I think where you are 0:17:55.920 --> 0:17:59.680 Jenna like lit up passionate about something like fully on fire. 0:17:59.760 --> 0:18:04.160 Being in your creator is you have to know what 0:18:04.160 --> 0:18:07.200 your essence is, like the essence of you, the gift 0:18:07.240 --> 0:18:09.080 of you, like the thing that is just uniquely you, 0:18:09.240 --> 0:18:13.479 and go where you'll be used for that. So I 0:18:13.520 --> 0:18:16.360 don't know that you've found that yet. You know that 0:18:16.480 --> 0:18:19.399 you could and or even when Janna brings you an 0:18:19.440 --> 0:18:22.640 idea and says, let's get really excited about this, and 0:18:22.680 --> 0:18:25.600 you are, but the role that you're supposed to play 0:18:25.640 --> 0:18:28.800 is still not clear, like what you actually have to do? 0:18:28.880 --> 0:18:32.440 Do you know? And there could be I mean, as 0:18:32.440 --> 0:18:34.199 an entrepreneur, I know there's a lot of things that 0:18:34.240 --> 0:18:35.960 I have to do that I don't particularly love, that 0:18:36.000 --> 0:18:38.960 aren't my essence, that just come with the territory. So 0:18:39.040 --> 0:18:42.879 that needs to be sorted out. And you may just 0:18:43.040 --> 0:18:45.080 get on board with an idea and still put up 0:18:45.080 --> 0:18:47.159 with some of that dragging your feet a little bit 0:18:47.200 --> 0:18:51.399 because it's just not it's not your ultimate joy. But 0:18:52.760 --> 0:18:55.119 I think I think it'd be interesting to see, like 0:18:55.200 --> 0:18:58.280 what is the thing that's uniquely you that you want 0:18:58.320 --> 0:19:00.560 to go for, Whether or not that might be a 0:19:00.600 --> 0:19:05.080 shared project with you, Jane, I don't know, because right 0:19:05.119 --> 0:19:07.280 now it just doesn't feel like anything's totally calling you. 0:19:07.320 --> 0:19:09.959 And that's nothing to feel bad about. We lose our mojo, 0:19:10.040 --> 0:19:12.919 our motivation all the time when when we're not on 0:19:12.960 --> 0:19:16.480 a clear path, when we're not aligned with what we're 0:19:16.520 --> 0:19:16.920 here for. 0:19:18.080 --> 0:19:20.560 No, and I've always told him too, like I've always 0:19:20.600 --> 0:19:23.600 been the like I would love to do this with you, 0:19:23.640 --> 0:19:26.000 but if you don't want to do this, like because 0:19:26.000 --> 0:19:27.800 I know he really wanted to go in law enforcement 0:19:27.840 --> 0:19:29.600 and we've talked about it a few times on the show, 0:19:29.880 --> 0:19:33.080 and you know he wanted to. But it's that kind 0:19:33.080 --> 0:19:36.560 of that thing where it's like he was like, nah, 0:19:36.600 --> 0:19:38.399 like this is easier, or you know, like I know 0:19:38.400 --> 0:19:40.200 you've got a real estate license, but you haven't really 0:19:40.560 --> 0:19:42.120 worked on it. So it's just it's one of those 0:19:42.119 --> 0:19:44.199 things where I'm like, and that's okay. If that's not 0:19:44.280 --> 0:19:46.359 your passion, then let's then then don't do it. But 0:19:46.760 --> 0:19:49.400 you put these things out there and then you don't, 0:19:49.560 --> 0:19:51.680 you don't go through it. And so but I want 0:19:51.680 --> 0:19:53.440 to be your supporter, Like I want to be like, Okay, 0:19:53.480 --> 0:19:55.760 what am I going to support you on? Is it 0:19:55.800 --> 0:19:58.840 the real estate? Is it our projects? Is it you know, 0:19:59.840 --> 0:20:02.800 is it's law enforcement? Like what is it that like 0:20:03.200 --> 0:20:06.040 will ignite you and excite you to want to get 0:20:06.040 --> 0:20:06.719 out there and do it? 0:20:09.520 --> 0:20:15.359 Yeah. I think what's coming up for me is because 0:20:16.119 --> 0:20:19.119 of my background of just being so scheduled and it 0:20:19.280 --> 0:20:24.440 was non negotiable, right, Like it wasn't like the time 0:20:24.480 --> 0:20:28.359 may change, it was that's the time you're doing something period. 0:20:28.760 --> 0:20:31.480 I mean, I can schedule you. You know, that's my dream. 0:20:31.720 --> 0:20:34.840 My dream is to schedule anytime we ever lose a bet. 0:20:34.920 --> 0:20:37.200 I'm like my dream and what I would do it's 0:20:37.240 --> 0:20:40.320 not a it's not an hour massage or whatever. Or 0:20:41.280 --> 0:20:43.359 I would love to schedule his week like it would 0:20:43.400 --> 0:20:45.520 just give me and you know what would be. It'd 0:20:45.560 --> 0:20:47.160 be like he gets to work out from this time 0:20:47.200 --> 0:20:49.520 to this time, he gets, you know whatever, go plays 0:20:49.520 --> 0:20:51.640 golf on Tuesdays and then we do a pro It's 0:20:51.640 --> 0:20:54.640 like I would it would give me so much joy. 0:20:54.680 --> 0:20:56.119 And I'm like, and I feel like he would be 0:20:56.119 --> 0:20:58.200 happier because I know you love schedules. 0:20:58.440 --> 0:21:01.800 Yeah, again, what comes up? 0:21:01.920 --> 0:21:02.399 I agree? 0:21:02.640 --> 0:21:07.080