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Speaker 1: Tanya Ready, Ready, Baca ready, I'm ready Easton Ready Ready,

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Speaker 1: Hanah Ready. Here we go.

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Speaker 2: Scrubbing In with Becca Tilly and Tanya rad An iHeartRadio podcast.

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Speaker 2: Hello everybody, we are scrubbing in, scrubbing in.

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Speaker 3: Can you hear me?

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Speaker 4: Yes, I've been having some issues with my sounds, but

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Speaker 4: I'm back to normal.

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Speaker 3: Good.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, happy to hear it. How you doing, I'm doing okay.

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Speaker 4: How are you doing?

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Speaker 3: I'm doing okay as well.

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Why are we both just okay? Should we get into that?

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Speaker 4: I'd like to get into why you're just okay?

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Speaker 2: Well, I am just okay because I don't know. I've

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Speaker 2: just had I've been having a couple of hard weeks.

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Speaker 2: I think that I I mean, I I had a

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Speaker 2: hard I have a.

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Speaker 3: Hard time when Haley's gone.

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Speaker 2: But I think that there's deeper rooted stuff that I'm

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Speaker 2: like navigating, and her being.

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Speaker 3: Gone just like.

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Speaker 2: Exacerbates it makes it. I don't think exactly is.

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Speaker 3: That right to create?

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Speaker 2: Thank you?

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Speaker 5: Thank you?

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Speaker 2: It magnifies that those feelings of like what I'm navigating,

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Speaker 2: and it's like deeper stuff that I'm like navigating with

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Speaker 2: my therapist. But I think the main part is that

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Speaker 2: there's a part of me and I don't know. Maybe

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Speaker 2: you guys can help me if y'all have experienced this,

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Speaker 2: since you're both married and in long term relationships. I

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Speaker 2: feel like there's a part of me that started that.

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Speaker 2: My whole life, I have been so independent, like I

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Speaker 2: have been so okay on my own. I loved being

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Speaker 2: home alone. I longed for a long distance relationship because

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Speaker 2: I liked my space.

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Speaker 4: Right, that was the most shocking of everything.

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Speaker 2: Right, So I think somewhere along the way being a

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Speaker 2: relationship and falling in love for the first time, I

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Speaker 2: feel like I've lost a little bit of like myself

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Speaker 2: and my independence and like and so then when Haley's here,

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Speaker 2: it's great because I have that comfort of my person

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Speaker 2: being here. But when she leaves what she with her

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Speaker 2: job that's common, I feel very almost.

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Speaker 3: Like what do I do without her? Or like what

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Speaker 3: do I do with my time?

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Speaker 2: Or like what do I you know, Like I almost

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Speaker 2: am like, wait, what do I love to do by myself?

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Speaker 2: And like why why did I lose that sense of

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Speaker 2: like independence? And as it's nothing that she did or

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Speaker 2: anything to do with her, it's more like me, like

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Speaker 2: where or why did that happen. So I was curious,

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Speaker 2: as y'all have, if you ever felt that feeling of

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Speaker 2: like dependence or codependency or what or no.

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Speaker 1: Yes, I have, And I do fight that, and I

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Speaker 1: do find that when my wife is out of town

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Speaker 1: with the kids, so I'm home alone, and that's happened

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Speaker 1: more lately because of dance and colleges and all kinds

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Speaker 1: of crazy stuff. So when I'm home alone for a weekend,

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Speaker 1: I feel like I'm house sitting. Like I don't feel

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Speaker 1: like I'm in my own home. I feel like I'm

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Speaker 1: I'm just you know, I got to keep things in order,

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Speaker 1: keep things clean. I'm like, oh, there's nobody here and

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Speaker 1: it's just me, and it feels like I'm in somebody

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Speaker 1: else's house. Yeah, And when they're there, it feels like home,

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Speaker 1: you know, And so they're gone and so it feels weird.

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Speaker 1: But I do fight that, and I do get into

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Speaker 1: the stuff that I enjoy, uh huh, like watching baseball

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Speaker 1: or you know, I go on long hikes and stuff like.

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Speaker 3: That, like things that you want to do when they're

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Speaker 3: normally there.

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Speaker 4: But I think becca yours is unique in the fact that, like, yes,

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Speaker 4: people leave for like a few days or a week, right,

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Speaker 4: it's not You're not having to fill months of your time, right, yeah,

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Speaker 4: weeks and weeks, you know, Like I think in normal relationship,

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Speaker 4: well I would say normal in typical relationships, somebody leaves

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Speaker 4: for maybe a few days, even a.

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Speaker 3: Week, even a week.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, but you're what you're going through I think is

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Speaker 4: unique to you because of the circumstance.

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Speaker 2: It's a very unique situation. But yeah, do you have

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Speaker 2: do you feel that when you're not with Alison?

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Speaker 5: Like I am without Alison very infrequently. She comes with

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Speaker 5: me on work trips.

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Speaker 3: It's true.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, it's great. Yeah, and I love it so, but

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Speaker 5: I also I like being alone and I get and

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Speaker 5: I get a lot of that time.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 5: Still, you know, like so, I don't know, I'm just

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Speaker 5: thinking in your situation, it seems like you just swung

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Speaker 5: the other the pendulum just went the other way, right.

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Speaker 2: Right, Yeah, I don't know.

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Speaker 5: Is it like a defense mechanism thing, like you're you know,

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Speaker 5: now that you have this thing, you're afraid of losing it,

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Speaker 5: even though you were fine without it before.

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Speaker 3: That's what That's what.

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Speaker 2: That's also what I've been thinking about, is like so

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Speaker 2: before we before I met Hayley, and then when we met,

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Speaker 2: she was on tour, so like that was all we

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Speaker 2: knew for a little bit. And then I feel like

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Speaker 2: with the pandemic and like all these things happening in between,

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Speaker 2: like the time we met and now there was time

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Speaker 2: where we were like always together and we got used

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Speaker 2: to being together. And then I also think there is

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Speaker 2: something to the fear of like, Okay, I see my future,

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Speaker 2: Like I officially feel like I'm I finally let myself

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Speaker 2: feel like Okay, I see my future with this person,

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Speaker 2: and the fear of losing that almost feels heavier.

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Speaker 3: So it feels like, oh, I need to like protect myself,

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Speaker 3: you know.

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Speaker 2: But anyways, it feels like there's a sense of like

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Speaker 2: independence lost and like me needing to find because obviously

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna miss her. Like I don't think that there's

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Speaker 2: anything I could do. I don't think there's any growth

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Speaker 2: or self help I could do that would eliminate the

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Speaker 2: feeling of missing her while she's gone. But I do

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Speaker 2: think there's a sense of being able to find and

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Speaker 2: do those things that I loved doing alone, like why

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Speaker 2: with my friends.

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Speaker 1: Because now it seems like whatever you come up with

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Speaker 1: doing you're like, oh, I'd rather do that.

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Speaker 3: Right, No, that's the thing. But like, I but is

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Speaker 3: that what it's supposed to be.

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Speaker 4: Like but not necessarily like don't you like you like

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Speaker 4: to like binge TV shows?

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Speaker 3: Not really? I kind of amount of that phase in

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Speaker 3: my life.

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Speaker 2: Oh really, Yeah, I get bored, but you know I

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Speaker 2: have a thing for like weekly airing shows.

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Speaker 3: You know, I prefer that anyways.

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Speaker 2: Even that I'm like, I'd rather be doing it with Haley,

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Speaker 2: Like I think I.

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Speaker 4: Like you like sitting home and enjoying TV.

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Speaker 3: No, I'm out of that really.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but I think that I blame TikTok for that

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Speaker 2: because I think that I'm more short term entertainment on

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Speaker 2: TikTok is just gone.

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Speaker 3: It's gone forever.

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Speaker 2: Well not forever, but as long as I have TikTok,

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Speaker 2: it's gonna be preferred to like sticking around for like

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Speaker 2: a love island. But my whole point is that I

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Speaker 2: feel like it's such a conflicting thing to open your

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Speaker 2: heart to love and give yourself to a relationship and

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Speaker 2: be so content with someone and then also be able

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Speaker 2: to have that independence of being like I know, like

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Speaker 2: in my head, I know I'm okay, I was okay

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Speaker 2: before I met Haley. I can be okay while she's

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Speaker 2: gone and miss her and support her and also take

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Speaker 2: care of myself. But instead I'm like crippled with anxiety

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Speaker 2: and like am not sleeping and mentally unwell.

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Speaker 4: But it's not I don't think you fear you're gonna

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Speaker 4: lose her. I just you just miss her.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, but I think subconscious there's something in

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Speaker 2: my head that's like you could lose her, which you could.

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Speaker 2: I mean you could lose everyone, yeah, right, but I

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Speaker 2: think there's been loss in other areas in my life

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Speaker 2: where I feel like it's like I didn't think I

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Speaker 2: would lose certain things from people, So in my mind

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Speaker 2: I feel like, well, she could do the same to me.

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Speaker 3: So I almost am like on this like defensive.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I go to on that dark path too.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean how do you feel?

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Speaker 2: I mean, do you feel like if if Robbie went

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Speaker 2: out of town for like months at a time, that

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Speaker 2: you would feel like yourself?

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Speaker 4: I would hate it. I don't. I prefer him being everywhere.

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Speaker 4: I really do.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, me too, it's so frustrating, it's not.

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Speaker 4: But I would not like break up with him because

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Speaker 4: he needed to. Like what I'm saying, I would.

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Speaker 2: Not like this is not really even about Hailey. This

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Speaker 2: is more about me, like self introspection, being like.

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Speaker 3: Becca, what do you love? What do you want to do?

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Speaker 2: What do you want to accomplish? Like what do you

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Speaker 2: want to do without needing Haley to be there with you?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: You know because in my mind, I'm like, oh, like

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Speaker 2: go travel places, and I'm like, but I don't want

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Speaker 2: to travel somewhere that I've never been without her.

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Speaker 4: It is interesting because I think the only time I

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Speaker 4: experienced this was a week Robbie took the Robbie went

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Speaker 4: skiing with the kids, and I stayed home. I can't

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Speaker 4: remember why exactly I stayed.

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Speaker 3: Back, but you were working on your book.

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Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I chose not to go on the trip.

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Speaker 4: And that was the longest I haven't been with him

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Speaker 4: in a while. And I just filled my time like

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Speaker 4: I filled that time like it was wake up, work out,

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Speaker 4: come home, shower, Uh, do book stuff, do more book stuff,

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Speaker 4: do more book stuff, clean the house, organized closets, Like

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Speaker 4: there's all these things I feel like that I always

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Speaker 4: I have on my to do list, and I just

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Speaker 4: started doing them. Yeah, that's kind of what I did

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Speaker 4: for that week. I just so I should write a book. Well,

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Speaker 4: not necessarily that, but like, if there's something you want

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Speaker 4: to do around your house, organize lause it, or if

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Speaker 4: there's something you want to do in your backyard, or

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Speaker 4: if there's something like anything, get to the to do list. Now.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's good advice, But I also.

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Speaker 4: Don't think what I did was necessarily healthy. I like

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Speaker 4: filled every every hour of my day with stuff.

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Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, my ideal situation would be to have

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Speaker 2: most of it filled, but then be at a place

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Speaker 2: where I'm okay, at home alone with my thoughts. That

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Speaker 2: hasn't been the safe space for me lately, so I

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Speaker 2: would like to get back to that because I was

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Speaker 2: so comfortable alone.

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Speaker 3: I was too comfortable alone.

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Speaker 4: But I feel like you can't reverse it.

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Speaker 2: That's what I'm saying. You can't. Once you experience that,

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Speaker 2: you can't. So to those who haven't fallen in love yet,

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Speaker 2: I don't enjoy yet.

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Speaker 1: Well, what works for me is a routine, and that

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Speaker 1: works for me every day. You know, I'm a creature

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Speaker 1: of routine. Yeah, when my family's gone for the weekend,

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Speaker 1: I have every minute of every day planned.

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Speaker 4: Out right, but I do the same not alone with

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Speaker 4: my healthy either.

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Speaker 2: Okay, well maybe, but that's another thing is that with

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Speaker 2: my job, my job is not like a routine type job,

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Speaker 2: like my days are always different.

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Speaker 3: I get to choose a lot like how I spend

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Speaker 3: my time.

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Speaker 2: And I think, even though my job is amazing and

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Speaker 2: I'm so grateful for the freedom to do whatever i want,

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Speaker 2: sometimes it's almost like overwhelming to me because I'm like,

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Speaker 2: I don't have something distracting.

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Speaker 3: Me at all time.

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Speaker 2: Times of like, yeah, it's a distractions.

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Speaker 3: I don't think that's a negative thing, be distracted.

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Speaker 4: You know what, Well, clearly I don't either. Could I

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Speaker 4: do it, but I do think there's a part of

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Speaker 4: it that's not healthy. Maybe you could do all your

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Speaker 4: doctor's appointments.

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Speaker 3: I did do my checkup because there's I do need

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Speaker 3: to do a dentist's siest, your.

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Speaker 4: Regular doctor to get your blood work.

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Speaker 3: To do all that. Thank you so much.

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Speaker 2: Actually, I was looking into maybe getting my blood work

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Speaker 2: checked out because I can't. Maybe there's like a hormonal

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Speaker 2: balance happening without me noticing that.

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Speaker 1: Is I think that is good advice, just to get

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Speaker 1: stuff downe that you need to get an oil change.

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Speaker 1: You know, there's just stuff that you.

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Speaker 4: Got to do, and all the stuff that you put

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Speaker 4: in the back burner of like your to do list,

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Speaker 4: because they're not like, yeah, what's the word I'm looking for? Timely? Yeah, sure,

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Speaker 4: time sensitive? Just get those done, all right?

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Speaker 2: So I'll do those next week. What about the next

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Speaker 2: three weeks?

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Speaker 5: Is there anything you like to do that Hayley doesn't No, because,

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Speaker 5: like I just realized, I've never been in my home

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Speaker 5: that I live in now we live there for almost

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Speaker 5: six years. I've never been there alone. Wow, Like Allison's

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Speaker 5: been with Every single night I've spent that house has

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Speaker 5: been with Allison. She hasn't been out of town with Like,

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Speaker 5: she hasn't gone somewhere overnight without me in years. I

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Speaker 5: go out of time for work all the time. But

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Speaker 5: when she's gone, I eat garbage, Baby, I just eat

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Speaker 5: straight up garbage. And that's what I look forward to.

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Speaker 5: And she knows about this. I look forward to it.

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Speaker 5: Like if she's having like dinner with a friend, I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 5: rand table pizza, here we go. That's literally the only

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Speaker 5: thing that is the only thing, yeah, that I look

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Speaker 5: forward to doing. You can't do You can't just eat

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Speaker 5: garbage all the time.

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Speaker 1: I don't know what I.

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Speaker 2: Would I do eat garbage all the time?

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Speaker 4: You want what you want to start learning how to cook?

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Speaker 4: You could start cooking more.

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Speaker 2: Y Yeah, hmm, yeah, there's there's a lot of things.

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Speaker 2: Oh So my therapist told me, she was like, I

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Speaker 2: want you to write down a list of a hundred

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Speaker 2: things you want.

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Speaker 3: And my mind felt like overwhelmed.

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Speaker 2: But I've been thinking about it and she's like, it

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Speaker 2: can be any like, it can be even if it

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Speaker 2: feels unatateed like crazy, I want to mansion with a

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Speaker 2: big yard.

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Speaker 3: Like she's like, just write it down.

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Speaker 1: Well, do mansion one big yard too, because you've got

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Speaker 1: a hundred to fill out, separate.

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Speaker 2: Fresh grab But I think, like the more I'm like

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Speaker 2: realizing those things where I think, like, oh, what do

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Speaker 2: I want? Because at first I felt I was like

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Speaker 2: a hundred things that I want, But I think I'm

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Speaker 2: gonna be able to do it.

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Speaker 4: And also a thing too. You can create structure in

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Speaker 4: your day depending on all these things that you want

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Speaker 4: to get done. So let's say you have doctor's appointments.

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Speaker 4: Let's write down all the doctors appointments and let's start

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Speaker 4: sprinkling those in, right, then you can create your day

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Speaker 4: around each of those. Cooking you want to start cooking,

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Speaker 4: let's find recipes and start plotting out your weeks with

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Speaker 4: what you're gonna do. You have to grocery shop, so

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Speaker 4: that also takes time mm hmm. Then perhaps you want

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Speaker 4: to start working out a little bit more. You can

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Speaker 4: plan your workouts according to like that structure of your

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Speaker 4: doctor's appointments and your meal preps.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so just just getting some things on a schedule.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I do think schedule a schedule would do you well?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, do me right.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, that's a little bit about me and uh

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Speaker 2: why I've just been okay, I think that there's a

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Speaker 2: little element of like wanting to get my mojo back.

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Speaker 4: I get it, you know, I understand what you're saying

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Speaker 4: because I also too, I find myself getting in that place.

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Speaker 3: Of complacency, not.

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Speaker 4: Complacency, dependency, yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, dependency. And

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Speaker 4: it's like because I feel the same way I love

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Speaker 4: I love Robbie being everywhere like I love him doing

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Speaker 4: everything with me, And there is there's that little like

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Speaker 4: thing in the back of the ear of my head

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Speaker 4: that's like fearful of that for some reason, like why,

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Speaker 4: like why can't I just do I can do stuff

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Speaker 4: alone And it doesn't mean like I can, but I

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Speaker 4: don't want to. Yes, And I find myself getting freaked

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Speaker 4: out about that too. But I'm not dependent on him,

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Speaker 4: but there is some sort of something there.

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Speaker 3: That's what I'm saying.

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Speaker 2: I don't necessarily, I do feel like I've become more

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Speaker 2: dependent on Hailey than I ever thought I would be

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Speaker 2: in a relationship. But I think it's more that there's

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Speaker 2: other stuff going on and coming up for me that

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Speaker 2: I'm navigating outside of my relationship with Haley, and she's

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Speaker 2: my comfort person, so she's not here to just sit

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Speaker 2: with me on the couch even if we're not doing

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Speaker 2: anything important, you know. So I think it's a little

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Speaker 2: bit of that as well. But it's fine, We're gonna

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Speaker 2: we'll be fine. I'll be fine. I just am like,

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Speaker 2: I don't want this month to be Like, do you have.

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Speaker 5: Plans to go see her on tour? You're like, yeah, I.

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Speaker 3: Think i'll probably.

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Speaker 2: I mean, we try not to go longer than two

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Speaker 2: weeks without seeing each other. So I think the Denver

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Speaker 2: show where my little sister lives in Denver, so I

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Speaker 2: was gonna try to go that one. I think that's

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Speaker 2: like right at two weeks from when she leaves, so

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Speaker 2: that'll be good, and then.

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Speaker 3: Maybe like another one.

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Speaker 5: That's okay, it's good to have something to look forward to.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 2: So anyways, teas and peas, not some prayers.

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Speaker 3: And or you telling me to take a break. I

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Speaker 3: know what that man.

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Speaker 2: Okay, we'll be right back with my Tanya's just okay,

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Speaker 2: all right, Well, we spent the whole first half of

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Speaker 2: the episode talking about my mental health issues.

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Speaker 3: So what's going on with you?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I had some mental health issues myself this week.

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Speaker 4: I'd like to preface it by saying that I am

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Speaker 4: my liutial end of my liudial phase pre menstrual phase,

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Speaker 4: so that I'm really low energy, like I could I

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Speaker 4: could literally fall asleep right now, okay, and I'm emotional,

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Speaker 4: like really emotional.

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Speaker 3: Okay.

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Speaker 4: So last week there was this thread in the Facebook

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Speaker 4: group that was like going on and on and on

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Speaker 4: about the premise of it was wanting to hear more

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Speaker 4: from Becca. But as I continue to read through the thread,

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Speaker 4: there was all this like really triggering words about me

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Speaker 4: and how my personality is too much and I'm too

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Speaker 4: overbearing and I'm to this and that like takes me

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Speaker 4: back to the days of my work. I don't maybe

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Speaker 4: you should believe his name.

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Speaker 6: We can believe his name just because you know, yeah,

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Speaker 6: but this triggering feeling of when I started out in

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Speaker 6: my career of this important person at the company who

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Speaker 6: would say these things about me and my personality.

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Speaker 4: And it was like really really damaging to me when

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Speaker 4: I started, because it was just so hurtful, you know,

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Speaker 4: because it's like about you and it's about me, and

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Speaker 4: so it really kind of like brought me back to

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Speaker 4: that place and I went so dark. Whatever day, I

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Speaker 4: can't remember what day it was that I was reading

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Speaker 4: it all, and I was like, I don't want to

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Speaker 4: do the podcast on Monday. I like, just because I

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Speaker 4: don't really care about internet trolls, but like this Facebook

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Speaker 4: group is like those are my people, you know what

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Speaker 4: I mean? Like that, so that I think that's why

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Speaker 4: I took it so hard anyway, So I was like,

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Speaker 4: I text me back. I was like, I don't do

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Speaker 4: the podcast on Monday, and like all this stuff, and

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Speaker 4: like Robbie sat down and gave me this speech and

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Speaker 4: it was like so sweet, and he was like he

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Speaker 4: could use like a Kobe Bryant analogy, not familiar with

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Speaker 4: like his work, but the analogy made sense because he

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Speaker 4: was like he was like trying to explain to me

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Speaker 4: the overarching theme of it, which was wanting Becka to

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Speaker 4: share more and open up more. And he was like

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Speaker 4: Kobe Bryant and used to get a lot of heat

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Speaker 4: in his day because the people would criticize him that

396
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Speaker 4: he was always shooting the ball, like he was always

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Speaker 4: shooting the ball and he wasn't passing. Are you familiar

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Speaker 4: with this?

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Speaker 2: Okay?

400
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Speaker 4: And so because he was getting so much heat for it,

401
00:19:16,440 --> 00:19:18,879
Speaker 4: he did not shoot any balls for like a long

402
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Speaker 4: period of time. He would just pass past, constantly passed

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Speaker 4: to his teammates. And he was doing this interview, which

404
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Speaker 4: I guess is what Robbie was talking about, and he

405
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Speaker 4: says he regrets so much that portion of his career

406
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Speaker 4: that he listened to what other people thought and just

407
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Speaker 4: passed the ball and he didn't do what was instinctually

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Speaker 4: like right for him or whatever. And he was saying

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Speaker 4: how he really regretted that, and he was like, don't

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Speaker 4: he's like show up, do the podcast, like don't do

411
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Speaker 4: don't be different, don't dim anything, just be you. And

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Speaker 4: it made me so it was like such a sweet

413
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Speaker 4: analogy because like, hey, I don't it really like actually

414
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Speaker 4: resonated with me. I never thought i'd resonate with like

415
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Speaker 4: a sports analogy. You are your sports, yeah, sortinly, yeah,

416
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Speaker 4: but more hockey than anything.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, basketball for me.

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Speaker 4: Yeah it was for a minute, but girls basketball, right right,

419
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Speaker 4: But yeah, I don't know. So it was like that

420
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Speaker 4: pep talk, and I guess that's what I can relate

421
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Speaker 4: Twitter saying that Hayley is like your comfort because I

422
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Speaker 4: really was like really really sad that day, Like I

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Speaker 4: was having like an emotional rollercoaster, and at the end

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Speaker 4: of the day, he like gives me this pep talk

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Speaker 4: and like it didn't necessarily make me, you know, I

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Speaker 4: wasn't like yeah, but it really did make me, like

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Speaker 4: comforted me in such a way. And I was like,

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Speaker 4: he's right, I just need to like take the note

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Speaker 4: and just like move forward and keep doing keep doing me.

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Speaker 4: So anyways, that was that, and then I just kind

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Speaker 4: of chilled, like I kind of just wanted to just

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Speaker 4: like chill and I was like not, Yeah, I was

433
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Speaker 4: just kind of bummed over the weekend.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that sometimes, like especially before I shared

435
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Speaker 2: my relationship. Well, first of all, I'm sorry that you

436
00:20:55,960 --> 00:20:58,680
Speaker 2: had to read those things, because like, regardless.

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Speaker 3: Of who you are or what.

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Speaker 2: Where it's coming from, words hurt, especially when it's from

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Speaker 2: such a special place. Like I said, it's not like

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Speaker 2: these are like random internet trolls.

441
00:21:13,280 --> 00:21:15,119
Speaker 4: But I do understand because I feel like there was

442
00:21:15,160 --> 00:21:18,000
Speaker 4: a point where and I don't remember when, but I

443
00:21:18,040 --> 00:21:20,560
Speaker 4: remember when you first started, when you were dating Haley,

444
00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:22,680
Speaker 4: and you were really kind of coming into a shell

445
00:21:23,280 --> 00:21:25,679
Speaker 4: and you didn't want to share anything, and I remember

446
00:21:25,760 --> 00:21:28,280
Speaker 4: I tried to overcompensate, so I was just like blabbing,

447
00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:30,480
Speaker 4: like I was just like because I was trying to

448
00:21:30,640 --> 00:21:32,960
Speaker 4: like I knew what you were going through, yes, And

449
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:35,320
Speaker 4: so I think I just stuck in that mentality of

450
00:21:35,400 --> 00:21:36,760
Speaker 4: just like blah blah, you know what I mean, And

451
00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:38,639
Speaker 4: I did. I did notice it a while ago. I

452
00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:40,439
Speaker 4: was like, I do need to like chill a little bit.

453
00:21:40,480 --> 00:21:43,199
Speaker 4: I get overexcited, and like, I do get it. So

454
00:21:43,240 --> 00:21:44,640
Speaker 4: I did get that point a while ago.

455
00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:49,000
Speaker 2: But this was just like I think, also, our personalities

456
00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:52,120
Speaker 2: are very different in the sense that I am an

457
00:21:52,160 --> 00:21:55,479
Speaker 2: overthinker with everything I share. So when I'm telling a story,

458
00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:58,280
Speaker 2: if I feel like there's no interest or like there's

459
00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:01,000
Speaker 2: not really any follow up, I just will stop talking,

460
00:22:01,080 --> 00:22:02,879
Speaker 2: like I don't even think about twice about it.

461
00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:04,840
Speaker 4: And that's and I think I know too much, and

462
00:22:04,880 --> 00:22:07,159
Speaker 4: so I get debilitated because I don't want to like,

463
00:22:08,080 --> 00:22:09,760
Speaker 4: I know what you're saying, but I know the listeners

464
00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:11,240
Speaker 4: don't know what you're saying. So then I don't want

465
00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:12,399
Speaker 4: to ask it because I don't want to put you

466
00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:14,200
Speaker 4: in that position because I feel like you're not sharing

467
00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:14,879
Speaker 4: it for a reason.

468
00:22:15,240 --> 00:22:18,640
Speaker 2: And then sometimes, you know, sometimes there's conversations where I'm like, oh,

469
00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:20,199
Speaker 2: I want to talk about this, and if there's no

470
00:22:20,280 --> 00:22:23,240
Speaker 2: interest from it, it is, you know, the conversation kind

471
00:22:23,240 --> 00:22:26,679
Speaker 2: of dies. But I also think there's a personality just

472
00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:28,240
Speaker 2: like we're opposites.

473
00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:30,160
Speaker 3: And there was a long time where I didn't share

474
00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:30,480
Speaker 3: a lot.

475
00:22:30,560 --> 00:22:33,240
Speaker 2: There was a lot of that I didn't feel safe

476
00:22:33,320 --> 00:22:36,120
Speaker 2: or like I wasn't ready to share. So I think

477
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:38,400
Speaker 2: you did have to take the lead on a lot

478
00:22:38,400 --> 00:22:42,919
Speaker 2: of the conversations because I wasn't talking, you know, So

479
00:22:43,520 --> 00:22:48,560
Speaker 2: I think I I I know where I can also

480
00:22:49,320 --> 00:22:51,679
Speaker 2: speak up more and stand up and even if like

481
00:22:51,840 --> 00:22:54,200
Speaker 2: it comes down to me having a conversation something that

482
00:22:54,240 --> 00:22:56,320
Speaker 2: I do want to talk about further than what I say,

483
00:22:56,720 --> 00:22:58,120
Speaker 2: be able to be like wait, wait, wait, I want

484
00:22:58,119 --> 00:22:59,840
Speaker 2: to go back to that you know yeah, and just

485
00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:01,719
Speaker 2: be able to speak up more because sometimes, I mean,

486
00:23:01,760 --> 00:23:03,000
Speaker 2: I come from a big family.

487
00:23:03,119 --> 00:23:05,359
Speaker 3: I was always kind of the more quiet, reserved one.

488
00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:07,840
Speaker 2: I've always been that way, so I think sometimes it's

489
00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:10,720
Speaker 2: natural for me to just like go inward and you

490
00:23:10,760 --> 00:23:13,720
Speaker 2: know yeah, And I think that you're able to pick

491
00:23:13,800 --> 00:23:15,920
Speaker 2: up the slack a lot of the times when I'm

492
00:23:15,920 --> 00:23:21,880
Speaker 2: in that position. So listen, you're amazing. The reason why

493
00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:24,639
Speaker 2: our podcast is amazing is because of our dynamic. And

494
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:27,040
Speaker 2: I don't ever want you to feel shut down because

495
00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:32,000
Speaker 2: there's a hard time or no, I'm way too fragile

496
00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:33,160
Speaker 2: for it too.

497
00:23:33,880 --> 00:23:37,399
Speaker 4: I too, I'm so preperiod it's like coming any second now.

498
00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:38,560
Speaker 3: But it's true.

499
00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:41,200
Speaker 2: I mean, I think what we have is so special

500
00:23:41,240 --> 00:23:44,560
Speaker 2: and I think that if it's a place where we

501
00:23:44,680 --> 00:23:47,000
Speaker 2: find more of a balance and that that also comes

502
00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:49,119
Speaker 2: for me too. So I never want you to feel

503
00:23:49,119 --> 00:23:52,040
Speaker 2: shut down or feel like you're too much because people

504
00:23:52,240 --> 00:23:55,800
Speaker 2: love you for your personality and your excitement and your passion.

505
00:23:55,960 --> 00:23:58,880
Speaker 2: So don't ever like feel like you have to dim

506
00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:02,840
Speaker 2: who you are, shut down or you, or like I

507
00:24:02,880 --> 00:24:05,679
Speaker 2: don't want to do the podcast because this podcast is

508
00:24:05,720 --> 00:24:06,880
Speaker 2: what it is because of you.

509
00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:10,240
Speaker 3: It wasn't like I don't want to do it today.

510
00:24:10,520 --> 00:24:12,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I get it.

511
00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:13,800
Speaker 3: I probably wouldn't have.

512
00:24:14,280 --> 00:24:18,399
Speaker 2: I probably would have been like I'm out week three. Ye.

513
00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:24,920
Speaker 2: So but I think it's important we address it because

514
00:24:24,960 --> 00:24:29,000
Speaker 2: I think, you know, sometimes I do think sometimes, And

515
00:24:29,080 --> 00:24:32,080
Speaker 2: I didn't read a lot of the comments because I

516
00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:36,960
Speaker 2: got I honestly felt upset for you and knew that

517
00:24:37,040 --> 00:24:39,000
Speaker 2: it was hard for you. But I think the original

518
00:24:39,080 --> 00:24:42,000
Speaker 2: post I didn't feel like it was like hateful or anything.

519
00:24:42,040 --> 00:24:43,400
Speaker 2: I think it was more just like, hey, we want

520
00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:46,840
Speaker 2: to Becca, you know from Becca. But that's also on

521
00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:51,760
Speaker 2: me again, So I'll start talking more and if y'all

522
00:24:51,760 --> 00:24:53,959
Speaker 2: don't like my stories, then you can tell tell me

523
00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:54,240
Speaker 2: on the.

524
00:24:54,200 --> 00:24:55,280
Speaker 4: Facebook group.

525
00:24:58,840 --> 00:25:01,320
Speaker 2: Did you that the day that this happened, I actually

526
00:25:01,359 --> 00:25:06,159
Speaker 2: posted this meme It's like a double toilet, and I

527
00:25:06,280 --> 00:25:09,480
Speaker 2: tagged you and Robbie and said, like, this feels like

528
00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:10,959
Speaker 2: Tanya's dream or something.

529
00:25:11,560 --> 00:25:13,920
Speaker 3: I have the idea for Tanya and Robbie.

530
00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,680
Speaker 4: I would love this, not because of the pooping stuff,

531
00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:20,000
Speaker 4: but like just in general, I feel like having two

532
00:25:20,480 --> 00:25:23,800
Speaker 4: toilets is so beneficial, Like we only have two toilets

533
00:25:23,800 --> 00:25:25,199
Speaker 4: in the whole house, and there's four of us, and

534
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:27,520
Speaker 4: sometimes we come home, like we all have to go

535
00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:28,119
Speaker 4: to the bathroom, but.

536
00:25:28,240 --> 00:25:31,320
Speaker 1: You don't want to connected toilets like to fine, have

537
00:25:31,400 --> 00:25:32,440
Speaker 1: separate toilets the.

538
00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:35,439
Speaker 2: Way that those are a positioned to so fuck, like

539
00:25:35,640 --> 00:25:36,920
Speaker 2: you're just doing your own thing.

540
00:25:38,920 --> 00:25:41,000
Speaker 4: I would use this, I would, I would use this.

541
00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:41,879
Speaker 4: I'd buy this tomorrow.

542
00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:44,160
Speaker 3: No, because I don't.

543
00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:49,359
Speaker 4: This is your yearine smell after which is how often

544
00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:49,719
Speaker 4: I mean.

545
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:55,320
Speaker 2: Well, then we did discuss Robbie can't smell, so he's yeah.

546
00:25:55,800 --> 00:25:58,440
Speaker 4: It's really such a blessing from the Lord.

547
00:25:58,640 --> 00:25:59,560
Speaker 3: I didn't talk.

548
00:25:59,400 --> 00:26:01,640
Speaker 2: About this, and this was a big thing that happened

549
00:26:01,680 --> 00:26:04,280
Speaker 2: while I was gone. But this is mostly a story

550
00:26:04,320 --> 00:26:08,800
Speaker 2: for Mark just to get his reaction. So I rented

551
00:26:08,800 --> 00:26:12,199
Speaker 2: a car while I was in I was like in

552
00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:16,520
Speaker 2: Dallas and then Shreveport, Louisiana, which is my hometown, and

553
00:26:16,560 --> 00:26:20,200
Speaker 2: I was on my way home to Dallas and not home.

554
00:26:20,240 --> 00:26:21,679
Speaker 2: I was on my way back to Dallas and I

555
00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:24,640
Speaker 2: was staying with a friend and I had to return

556
00:26:24,920 --> 00:26:29,439
Speaker 2: my rental car to the airport and then uber to

557
00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:31,280
Speaker 2: my friend's house. It was just like I did a

558
00:26:31,320 --> 00:26:34,120
Speaker 2: lot to do and I I was on the phone

559
00:26:34,160 --> 00:26:36,399
Speaker 2: with Haley and we were having kind of like a

560
00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:39,000
Speaker 2: serious conversation, and she was in Europe, so like the

561
00:26:39,040 --> 00:26:39,600
Speaker 2: time difference.

562
00:26:39,640 --> 00:26:42,040
Speaker 3: It was like, I if I pull.

563
00:26:41,920 --> 00:26:44,080
Speaker 2: Over and get gas when my gas like came on,

564
00:26:45,119 --> 00:26:46,679
Speaker 2: I'm gonna have to hang up. And we're kind of

565
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:49,399
Speaker 2: like in this serious conversation and I'm like, I know

566
00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:51,359
Speaker 2: how long I have and I'll wait till I see

567
00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:57,399
Speaker 2: like a safe gas station exit. You know. Well, I'm

568
00:26:57,880 --> 00:27:01,960
Speaker 2: I swear this happened faster than my car goes.

569
00:27:01,960 --> 00:27:03,760
Speaker 3: Because it's incredible.

570
00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:07,000
Speaker 2: So my car starts to just shut down and I'm

571
00:27:07,040 --> 00:27:08,919
Speaker 2: like oh no, no, no, no, no, no no, And

572
00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:11,600
Speaker 2: Haley's like what And I'm like I'm running out of

573
00:27:11,680 --> 00:27:15,200
Speaker 2: gas and she's like, well, just like pull over, wait

574
00:27:15,280 --> 00:27:17,240
Speaker 2: till you get to nextit, like get in the right

575
00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:19,040
Speaker 2: lane and just pull off when you see an nextit.

576
00:27:19,119 --> 00:27:23,040
Speaker 2: I'm like no, Like, my the car is stopping and

577
00:27:23,080 --> 00:27:24,359
Speaker 2: she's like, are you kidding?

578
00:27:24,400 --> 00:27:25,119
Speaker 3: She's like where are you.

579
00:27:25,160 --> 00:27:28,720
Speaker 2: And I'm like, I'm on the Interstate and she's like, well,

580
00:27:28,880 --> 00:27:31,080
Speaker 2: what are you gonna do? So I like veered off

581
00:27:31,119 --> 00:27:33,919
Speaker 2: and there was like there was this weird road in

582
00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:36,840
Speaker 2: between the interstate and then the service road and it

583
00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:39,439
Speaker 2: just happened to be right where I needed it to be,

584
00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:41,840
Speaker 2: and so I pull off and so I'm not in

585
00:27:41,960 --> 00:27:45,520
Speaker 2: like the crazy busy part, but I'm for sure out

586
00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:50,280
Speaker 2: of gas. Like the car just stops and so I'm like, Haley,

587
00:27:50,320 --> 00:27:53,000
Speaker 2: I'm gonna have to I'll talk to you tomorrow go

588
00:27:53,119 --> 00:27:56,040
Speaker 2: to sleep. And she's like I'm not what are you

589
00:27:56,080 --> 00:27:58,080
Speaker 2: gonna do? And I'm like She goes call Triple A

590
00:27:58,119 --> 00:28:00,199
Speaker 2: and I'm like, I don't have Triple A. So at

591
00:28:00,240 --> 00:28:03,240
Speaker 2: that time, my friend Laura, who's been my best friend

592
00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:05,760
Speaker 2: since high school. She lives in Louisiana, in my hometown.

593
00:28:06,359 --> 00:28:08,679
Speaker 2: She texted me and asked how my sister's baby shower

594
00:28:08,840 --> 00:28:11,600
Speaker 2: was and I was like it was great. Do you

595
00:28:11,640 --> 00:28:16,480
Speaker 2: have Triple A. She's like why, and I go, well,

596
00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:18,560
Speaker 2: I might have run out of gas.

597
00:28:20,119 --> 00:28:22,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, and she goes where are you.

598
00:28:22,320 --> 00:28:23,800
Speaker 2: And I was like, I'm in the middle of nowhere,

599
00:28:23,840 --> 00:28:29,040
Speaker 2: Texas And she goes, I'm in Tyler, Texas. Will you

600
00:28:29,240 --> 00:28:31,360
Speaker 2: send me your location and let me see how far

601
00:28:31,440 --> 00:28:33,959
Speaker 2: you are from me? So I send her my location.

602
00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:35,600
Speaker 2: She's like, I'm thirty minutes for me. I'm coming to

603
00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:39,560
Speaker 2: get you. Wow, And that is crazy. What are the chances?

604
00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:42,680
Speaker 2: She was there for her nephew's soccer tournament. And so

605
00:28:43,520 --> 00:28:46,360
Speaker 2: I'm just like sitting in my car waiting for her

606
00:28:46,360 --> 00:28:49,760
Speaker 2: to show up. She comes, I get in the car

607
00:28:49,800 --> 00:28:51,920
Speaker 2: with her and we're like lat you know. She like, no,

608
00:28:52,080 --> 00:28:53,680
Speaker 2: She's known me for a long time, Like this is

609
00:28:53,800 --> 00:28:56,760
Speaker 2: very own brand for me. And we go and we

610
00:28:56,960 --> 00:29:01,120
Speaker 2: get by like a five gallon gas can, fill it

611
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:04,240
Speaker 2: up and I go to put it in the car

612
00:29:04,360 --> 00:29:08,280
Speaker 2: and it's spilling everywhere, Like I have gas on my arm,

613
00:29:08,480 --> 00:29:09,000
Speaker 2: my leg.

614
00:29:09,120 --> 00:29:11,760
Speaker 3: I'm like, flammable and.

615
00:29:12,280 --> 00:29:15,040
Speaker 4: Flammable is that the word flammable?

616
00:29:15,720 --> 00:29:16,720
Speaker 3: Flammable, isn't it?

617
00:29:16,720 --> 00:29:21,920
Speaker 4: Flammable is correct? So flammable on it today? You really are.

618
00:29:23,440 --> 00:29:26,600
Speaker 1: A few minutes ago you said exacerbated, but since then

619
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:29,400
Speaker 1: you said debilitated, which is also strong.

620
00:29:29,640 --> 00:29:32,960
Speaker 2: So I can't get the gas into the car and

621
00:29:33,280 --> 00:29:35,520
Speaker 2: Laura can't. I'm reading the instructions on the gas and

622
00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:37,520
Speaker 2: we're doing everything. It says, and I can't get it

623
00:29:37,560 --> 00:29:40,040
Speaker 2: to go. So I'm just like spilling gas everywhere. I'm

624
00:29:40,080 --> 00:29:43,560
Speaker 2: panicked it it's pitch black now, and I happen to

625
00:29:43,600 --> 00:29:46,120
Speaker 2: be parked right outside of a neighborhood.

626
00:29:46,680 --> 00:29:49,560
Speaker 3: So I'm like, I see a house. We should go

627
00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:51,600
Speaker 3: knock on their door. We need to, we need to.

628
00:29:51,680 --> 00:29:53,080
Speaker 1: Like the gas isn't getting in.

629
00:29:53,040 --> 00:29:55,720
Speaker 2: The table won't go, It's just spilling out everywhere, and

630
00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:58,160
Speaker 2: I'm like, we can't run out, like I need this

631
00:29:58,280 --> 00:30:00,280
Speaker 2: gas because I just got to get into the car,

632
00:30:01,280 --> 00:30:04,640
Speaker 2: like I'm gonna find a good old Texas countryman in

633
00:30:04,640 --> 00:30:06,600
Speaker 2: one of those neighborhoods.

634
00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:07,840
Speaker 1: You know, everyone is going to the wrong house is

635
00:30:07,840 --> 00:30:08,600
Speaker 1: getting shot.

636
00:30:08,680 --> 00:30:12,080
Speaker 3: Well this happened after my this decision.

637
00:30:12,680 --> 00:30:15,760
Speaker 2: So we go up and these like spotlights come on

638
00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:17,400
Speaker 2: in the house and I'm like, Laura, I don't think

639
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:19,240
Speaker 2: we should do this one, and she's like, yeah, it's fine,

640
00:30:19,240 --> 00:30:21,120
Speaker 2: it's fine. So we walk up and she's like I

641
00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:24,000
Speaker 2: think I see someone, and she's like, I don't know

642
00:30:24,000 --> 00:30:25,400
Speaker 2: why they're not coming to the door. And then this

643
00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:27,760
Speaker 2: like big dog starts barking, so I'm like, we gotta go,

644
00:30:27,800 --> 00:30:31,479
Speaker 2: we gotta go. So we walk out and we're walking.

645
00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:33,959
Speaker 2: These houses are space like, this is not la like.

646
00:30:34,320 --> 00:30:37,440
Speaker 2: These houses have a lot of acreage. So we're walking

647
00:30:37,480 --> 00:30:38,200
Speaker 2: to the next one.

648
00:30:38,840 --> 00:30:40,000
Speaker 3: Knock. No one answers.

649
00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:43,120
Speaker 2: I'm like, I genuinely don't know what we're gonna do

650
00:30:43,160 --> 00:30:46,560
Speaker 2: at this point. So we're walking down this pitch black road.

651
00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:51,800
Speaker 4: I'm guessing Laura did not does not have trouble a you.

652
00:30:51,880 --> 00:30:53,200
Speaker 5: Know, did you?

653
00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:55,680
Speaker 4: Guys ever circle back to the original question.

654
00:30:55,600 --> 00:31:00,440
Speaker 2: That didn't get circled back to. Yeah, No, I didn't

655
00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:01,400
Speaker 2: go back to that thought.

656
00:31:01,440 --> 00:31:03,040
Speaker 1: I could have circled back to where you bought the

657
00:31:03,080 --> 00:31:05,760
Speaker 1: gas tank maybe and said, hey, how come this isn't working?

658
00:31:05,800 --> 00:31:07,200
Speaker 1: What do I need to do? Because they could probably

659
00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:09,080
Speaker 1: sell you a spout or something that would get the job.

660
00:31:09,080 --> 00:31:12,960
Speaker 2: Oh, that also could have been something. The guy that

661
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:14,840
Speaker 2: was helping is at the gas station though, could not

662
00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:17,520
Speaker 2: even get the thing open like the gas cank go.

663
00:31:17,680 --> 00:31:20,920
Speaker 2: So I didn't feel trust like he didn't come across

664
00:31:20,920 --> 00:31:23,720
Speaker 2: trustworthy to me. So all of a sudden, we see

665
00:31:23,800 --> 00:31:26,320
Speaker 2: lights coming up, like headlights coming up the road, and

666
00:31:26,360 --> 00:31:28,520
Speaker 2: I'm like turning, I'm like waving them down.

667
00:31:28,680 --> 00:31:29,280
Speaker 1: Oh my god.

668
00:31:29,560 --> 00:31:32,280
Speaker 3: This guy falls over and he has his daughter in

669
00:31:32,320 --> 00:31:32,640
Speaker 3: the car.

670
00:31:32,800 --> 00:31:35,080
Speaker 2: So I was like, Okay, I feel safe, and I'm like,

671
00:31:35,240 --> 00:31:37,240
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry I ran out of gas. I'm like,

672
00:31:37,280 --> 00:31:39,280
Speaker 2: right at the end of the road, we got a

673
00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:41,200
Speaker 2: gas can, but we can't get the gas into the car.

674
00:31:41,280 --> 00:31:43,720
Speaker 2: So he's like, okay, I'll come back down and help y'all.

675
00:31:43,880 --> 00:31:46,600
Speaker 2: So we like walk back down. He goes to put

676
00:31:46,600 --> 00:31:49,080
Speaker 2: it in. It's spilling everywhere. So I'm like, hey, Gray,

677
00:31:49,160 --> 00:31:49,480
Speaker 2: I'm not.

678
00:31:49,440 --> 00:31:50,800
Speaker 4: An adot gas can.

679
00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:53,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, or we're both dumb, but I wasn't the only

680
00:31:53,320 --> 00:31:54,320
Speaker 2: one dumb in this situation.

681
00:31:54,440 --> 00:31:58,360
Speaker 3: So he's like, I have another gas can. Let me go.

682
00:31:59,280 --> 00:32:01,560
Speaker 2: Just follow me up and then I'll just pour this

683
00:32:01,600 --> 00:32:06,200
Speaker 2: one into that and we'll come back down. So he

684
00:32:06,360 --> 00:32:09,040
Speaker 2: ends up going by himself, and he comes back down

685
00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:10,720
Speaker 2: and brings his wife and she was like, well he

686
00:32:10,760 --> 00:32:12,880
Speaker 2: didn't and she like hugs us, and she's like, he

687
00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:14,280
Speaker 2: wanted me to come. He didn't want you all to

688
00:32:14,320 --> 00:32:16,400
Speaker 2: think he was creepy. And I'm like, where are the

689
00:32:16,400 --> 00:32:23,320
Speaker 2: ones waiting? Yeah, And so he brought another gas can

690
00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:24,880
Speaker 2: and was able to like fill it up, and then

691
00:32:24,920 --> 00:32:27,160
Speaker 2: his daughters come down there having like a sleepover, and

692
00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:30,640
Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, girls like this is what you don't do.

693
00:32:30,640 --> 00:32:34,360
Speaker 3: Don't do this, and he saved the day.

694
00:32:34,920 --> 00:32:36,240
Speaker 1: It's the way he had a gas take and that

695
00:32:36,280 --> 00:32:36,760
Speaker 1: works fine.

696
00:32:36,840 --> 00:32:38,640
Speaker 2: He had another he had like one with a spouse,

697
00:32:38,720 --> 00:32:41,400
Speaker 2: so he was able to like get it whatever. I

698
00:32:41,400 --> 00:32:46,640
Speaker 2: had a jeep, come yeah, get it in and uh yeah.

699
00:32:46,720 --> 00:32:48,240
Speaker 5: So he was just a gas can with like just

700
00:32:48,280 --> 00:32:48,920
Speaker 5: a cap on it.

701
00:32:48,920 --> 00:32:50,960
Speaker 2: It didn't have the had a spout, but the way

702
00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:56,960
Speaker 2: it worked it didn't go deep. Yeah.

703
00:32:57,040 --> 00:32:58,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, so.

704
00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:02,920
Speaker 4: Gas stations they have like a long spell.

705
00:33:03,040 --> 00:33:04,360
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, it's long.

706
00:33:04,600 --> 00:33:07,160
Speaker 4: It is long and goes deep. It is long. It's

707
00:33:07,160 --> 00:33:09,720
Speaker 4: like probably like over a foot two feet.

708
00:33:10,120 --> 00:33:11,280
Speaker 3: I don't think it's two feet.

709
00:33:11,320 --> 00:33:15,360
Speaker 2: But whatever they're putting the new like way that they're

710
00:33:15,400 --> 00:33:20,040
Speaker 2: doing gas Kansas, isn't it. So that was my story,

711
00:33:20,120 --> 00:33:22,480
Speaker 2: and that means I've run out of gas like twice

712
00:33:22,520 --> 00:33:24,960
Speaker 2: in the past six months, right.

713
00:33:24,880 --> 00:33:26,960
Speaker 1: Which I think should be caused for a certain amount

714
00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:29,840
Speaker 1: of introspection. But you're just like, that's me. That's what happens.

715
00:33:30,320 --> 00:33:33,160
Speaker 2: I have a lot of introspection navigating right now. Mark,

716
00:33:33,440 --> 00:33:35,600
Speaker 2: So because that's crazy to me.

717
00:33:36,120 --> 00:33:38,360
Speaker 4: When that light comes on, like I don't even let

718
00:33:38,360 --> 00:33:39,520
Speaker 4: my car light go on.

719
00:33:39,720 --> 00:33:40,320
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh.

720
00:33:40,360 --> 00:33:42,320
Speaker 4: I usually feel it before the light goes on, because

721
00:33:42,360 --> 00:33:45,200
Speaker 4: when your light goes on, it means it's time to

722
00:33:45,200 --> 00:33:45,680
Speaker 4: get gassed.

723
00:33:45,800 --> 00:33:48,880
Speaker 3: So i'd rather you even let the light come on.

724
00:33:48,960 --> 00:33:50,640
Speaker 4: I usually do a quarter of a tank. When I'm

725
00:33:50,640 --> 00:33:52,000
Speaker 4: at quarter, I fill her back up.

726
00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:54,960
Speaker 1: I have dashes on mine, and I got three dashes.

727
00:33:55,040 --> 00:33:56,760
Speaker 1: I'm getting that filled up, three dashes.

728
00:33:56,880 --> 00:33:58,880
Speaker 5: I let the light come on. When light comes on,

729
00:33:58,920 --> 00:34:00,680
Speaker 5: it's it's let the good times. But I go to

730
00:34:00,680 --> 00:34:02,200
Speaker 5: the gas station. I've run, I guess once in my

731
00:34:02,280 --> 00:34:03,200
Speaker 5: entire life, and it sucked.

732
00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:03,840
Speaker 1: I hated it.

733
00:34:03,960 --> 00:34:05,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, well no I'm not.

734
00:34:05,160 --> 00:34:07,400
Speaker 2: I'm not having fun when everyone now like, I'm not,

735
00:34:07,520 --> 00:34:08,600
Speaker 2: like this is great.

736
00:34:08,800 --> 00:34:12,680
Speaker 3: It's just I thought I had longer and I didn't.

737
00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:14,560
Speaker 1: And none of the one in the family's like, hey

738
00:34:14,600 --> 00:34:17,000
Speaker 1: aren't you Becca Tilly from TV's The Bachelor and the

739
00:34:17,040 --> 00:34:19,799
Speaker 1: popular podcast and People Choice Aword winning shows scrubbing in.

740
00:34:20,239 --> 00:34:26,759
Speaker 2: No, they didn't say that. No, it'd be nice the podcast.

741
00:34:27,440 --> 00:34:29,680
Speaker 1: What I respect what that guy did with bringing his wife,

742
00:34:29,680 --> 00:34:31,640
Speaker 1: because that's the thing we By the way, I'm not

743
00:34:31,680 --> 00:34:35,560
Speaker 1: saying we poor dudes, because I'm not saying that, but

744
00:34:35,600 --> 00:34:37,879
Speaker 1: that's a real issue that we needed to come off

745
00:34:37,880 --> 00:34:40,480
Speaker 1: as not creepy. And we want to be helpful and

746
00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:42,480
Speaker 1: we want to support people, and we want to be

747
00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:45,399
Speaker 1: nice to strangers. But it's it's weird because it can

748
00:34:45,440 --> 00:34:47,480
Speaker 1: come off as creepy and you gotta be careful about that.

749
00:34:47,719 --> 00:34:47,919
Speaker 2: Yeah.

750
00:34:47,960 --> 00:34:51,640
Speaker 5: I admired this guy for yes, but mostly because if

751
00:34:51,640 --> 00:34:53,640
Speaker 5: I if I were in his shoes, if I saw it,

752
00:34:53,719 --> 00:34:55,400
Speaker 5: if I pulled over and I saw you, You're like,

753
00:34:55,480 --> 00:34:57,080
Speaker 5: I ran into gas I can't get I have a

754
00:34:57,120 --> 00:34:58,879
Speaker 5: gas can, but I can't get in. I'm like, there's

755
00:34:58,920 --> 00:35:02,479
Speaker 5: a guy with a gun waiting for that objective idea.

756
00:35:02,520 --> 00:35:04,520
Speaker 5: It's like, oh good luck, sweetheart.

757
00:35:04,800 --> 00:35:06,160
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, I wouldn't.

758
00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:06,120
Speaker 5: Have done it.

759
00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:08,719
Speaker 2: I wouldn't have done it for myself, So yeah, I

760
00:35:08,719 --> 00:35:09,719
Speaker 2: wouldn't have done it either.

761
00:35:10,000 --> 00:35:13,040
Speaker 1: I went to take a pick up my youngest at

762
00:35:13,080 --> 00:35:15,040
Speaker 1: the elementary school. She was older. She was going back

763
00:35:15,040 --> 00:35:17,360
Speaker 1: to tutor and there's a little boy on the corner

764
00:35:17,400 --> 00:35:19,560
Speaker 1: outside the school and school's been over for a while now,

765
00:35:19,760 --> 00:35:22,400
Speaker 1: and he looks stressed out. He has tears in his eyes,

766
00:35:22,560 --> 00:35:26,080
Speaker 1: he looks a little panicky. But I cannot pull over

767
00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:29,480
Speaker 1: and start talking to that kid, because now I'm making

768
00:35:29,480 --> 00:35:32,640
Speaker 1: the situation worse. You know what I'm saying, I can't

769
00:35:32,640 --> 00:35:35,240
Speaker 1: be Hey, buddy's everything, okay, I can't do that. You could,

770
00:35:35,360 --> 00:35:37,880
Speaker 1: I can't. He's like an eight year old boy and

771
00:35:37,920 --> 00:35:40,839
Speaker 1: now now a guy, a strange man is pulling up

772
00:35:40,840 --> 00:35:42,200
Speaker 1: in a car and trying to talk to him. And

773
00:35:42,200 --> 00:35:43,680
Speaker 1: he's been told his whole life not to talk to

774
00:35:44,000 --> 00:35:47,440
Speaker 1: that person. So I waited till my daughter came out.

775
00:35:47,480 --> 00:35:49,360
Speaker 1: Once she was out, I had hair go up to

776
00:35:49,440 --> 00:35:50,960
Speaker 1: him and ask him if he was okay, because that

777
00:35:51,120 --> 00:35:53,239
Speaker 1: makes me safe for having my daughter with me and

778
00:35:53,280 --> 00:35:56,240
Speaker 1: her doing the talking. You just got to be sensitive

779
00:35:56,280 --> 00:35:57,960
Speaker 1: to that stuff because then his mom's going to pick

780
00:35:58,040 --> 00:36:00,080
Speaker 1: him up and he's like, some guy come and you

781
00:36:00,120 --> 00:36:02,200
Speaker 1: forgot to pick me up or whatever it was. And

782
00:36:02,200 --> 00:36:04,399
Speaker 1: some guy came and tried to talk to me, she'd

783
00:36:04,440 --> 00:36:06,399
Speaker 1: be in a panic. Next thing, you know, the whole

784
00:36:06,440 --> 00:36:10,120
Speaker 1: school is sending out letters warning people that there's a

785
00:36:10,120 --> 00:36:11,720
Speaker 1: guy pulling up and trying and talk to kids.

786
00:36:12,440 --> 00:36:15,359
Speaker 3: Yeah, but he had his daughter in the car, so

787
00:36:15,400 --> 00:36:16,319
Speaker 3: I was that's good.

788
00:36:16,400 --> 00:36:19,760
Speaker 2: Nothing about him came across creepy, And to be honest,

789
00:36:19,800 --> 00:36:22,759
Speaker 2: I was in a desperate state. We were like, we

790
00:36:22,880 --> 00:36:26,560
Speaker 2: just need your help, sir. Creepy or not so, but.

791
00:36:26,600 --> 00:36:28,839
Speaker 1: That's a sad thing, like what you were saying, we're

792
00:36:28,840 --> 00:36:30,879
Speaker 1: all a little suspicious of each other. Everyone's a little

793
00:36:30,920 --> 00:36:32,799
Speaker 1: bit creepy, like it's twenty twenty three and like we

794
00:36:32,840 --> 00:36:34,200
Speaker 1: can't help each other anymore. That's that.

795
00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:36,719
Speaker 5: When I go on a walk at nighttime and I

796
00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:39,200
Speaker 5: see like a woman jogging or something, I always crossed

797
00:36:39,200 --> 00:36:41,520
Speaker 5: the other side. Don't want to think I'm fall too. Yes,

798
00:36:42,239 --> 00:36:44,319
Speaker 5: last year there before, I was in Austin, Texas for

799
00:36:44,400 --> 00:36:46,160
Speaker 5: American Idol and I was on I was just walking.

800
00:36:46,160 --> 00:36:47,399
Speaker 5: It was really late and now I was just walking

801
00:36:47,440 --> 00:36:49,440
Speaker 5: downtown Austin and this woman's jogging and I like get

802
00:36:49,440 --> 00:36:51,080
Speaker 5: out of her way, so she doesn't, and she runs by.

803
00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:52,160
Speaker 5: She's like scrubbing in.

804
00:36:54,560 --> 00:36:57,240
Speaker 1: Okay, I will.

805
00:36:57,080 --> 00:36:59,120
Speaker 2: Say every time I'm on to walk, I and I'm

806
00:36:59,160 --> 00:37:02,880
Speaker 2: pass it. I mean sorry, it's men. But when a

807
00:37:02,960 --> 00:37:05,319
Speaker 2: man passes, I turn around to just make sure they don't.

808
00:37:05,680 --> 00:37:08,600
Speaker 2: They didn't turn around. It's it's unfortunate, but.

809
00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:10,640
Speaker 4: This man go at night anymore?

810
00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:13,960
Speaker 2: Like no even during the day though, Oh really, yeah, paranoid.

811
00:37:14,040 --> 00:37:16,360
Speaker 1: I walk my dog a lot. But when we're in Wisconsin,

812
00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:18,680
Speaker 1: we don't have our dogs with us, and so we'll

813
00:37:19,120 --> 00:37:21,120
Speaker 1: still need to get some exercise. So I'll have my

814
00:37:21,160 --> 00:37:22,919
Speaker 1: wife or daughters go for a walk with me around

815
00:37:22,920 --> 00:37:25,040
Speaker 1: the neighborhood. But if they're not available, like you just

816
00:37:25,040 --> 00:37:27,440
Speaker 1: go like I really can't. It's a little weird to

817
00:37:27,480 --> 00:37:30,040
Speaker 1: just be a weird old dude walking around the neighborhood,

818
00:37:30,920 --> 00:37:31,880
Speaker 1: especially after.

819
00:37:31,719 --> 00:37:32,560
Speaker 2: That the.

820
00:37:35,000 --> 00:37:38,759
Speaker 1: Dog, no dog, no dog. I think it's not fine,

821
00:37:38,840 --> 00:37:40,080
Speaker 1: especially after dark.

822
00:37:40,239 --> 00:37:44,560
Speaker 4: But I think you have really Yeah, if I saw

823
00:37:44,719 --> 00:37:47,920
Speaker 4: a man walking in the neighborhood by himself, i'd be

824
00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:48,760
Speaker 4: I'd call coughs.

825
00:37:50,840 --> 00:37:51,399
Speaker 1: I don't know.

826
00:37:51,480 --> 00:37:54,040
Speaker 3: I don't find it weird. Like if you're a good person,

827
00:37:54,160 --> 00:37:55,040
Speaker 3: then I don't.

828
00:37:54,920 --> 00:37:57,359
Speaker 4: Know, no Mark would be so sad.

829
00:37:57,520 --> 00:37:59,319
Speaker 1: I look good in people's windows for all they know.

830
00:37:59,400 --> 00:38:02,200
Speaker 2: People don't so that I don't have like a weapon

831
00:38:02,280 --> 00:38:03,000
Speaker 2: up mess.

832
00:38:02,840 --> 00:38:03,920
Speaker 3: Leave walking around.

833
00:38:04,000 --> 00:38:04,799
Speaker 1: It's different for you.

834
00:38:07,200 --> 00:38:10,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, I'm just saying I don't think that like y'all.

835
00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:11,720
Speaker 3: Have to be locked up in the house.

836
00:38:13,600 --> 00:38:15,120
Speaker 1: That's why I make them go with me if I

837
00:38:15,160 --> 00:38:17,080
Speaker 1: have something with you anymore.

838
00:38:17,320 --> 00:38:20,680
Speaker 2: Well. Shout out to Scott and his an amazing family

839
00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:24,239
Speaker 2: for helping us that lonely night in Texas.

840
00:38:25,480 --> 00:38:26,000
Speaker 3: Lynn Dale.

841
00:38:27,640 --> 00:38:32,239
Speaker 2: I think that's where we were, so yeah, I think

842
00:38:32,280 --> 00:38:34,839
Speaker 2: we have emails, So we'll take a break and we'll

843
00:38:34,840 --> 00:38:35,279
Speaker 2: be right back.

844
00:38:35,320 --> 00:39:00,719
Speaker 5: We got more gas in this tank, baby.

845
00:38:55,920 --> 00:38:58,239
Speaker 3: All right, we are back and we have emails. This

846
00:38:58,280 --> 00:38:58,759
Speaker 3: first one.

847
00:38:59,040 --> 00:39:01,520
Speaker 2: The disclaimer may be a laugh at while, but I

848
00:39:01,600 --> 00:39:03,080
Speaker 2: appreciate it anyway.

849
00:39:02,920 --> 00:39:05,239
Speaker 1: Abby says, please help Before I dive in, I want

850
00:39:05,239 --> 00:39:07,360
Speaker 1: to preface this email by saying that I'm fully aware

851
00:39:07,440 --> 00:39:11,000
Speaker 1: neither of you are medical professionals or merited adult medical advice,

852
00:39:11,160 --> 00:39:12,600
Speaker 1: which is nice because we would have had to say

853
00:39:12,640 --> 00:39:15,640
Speaker 1: that anyway. Now we don't have to. With that disclaimer

854
00:39:15,680 --> 00:39:19,600
Speaker 1: in mind, I was recently diagnosed with hashimotos. Prior to

855
00:39:19,640 --> 00:39:22,280
Speaker 1: my diagnosis, I had never heard of hashimotos. Hearing Tanya

856
00:39:22,320 --> 00:39:24,440
Speaker 1: talk about her health journey has made me feel a

857
00:39:24,480 --> 00:39:27,359
Speaker 1: lot less alone. However, I have eating habits more kin

858
00:39:27,440 --> 00:39:30,759
Speaker 1: to Becca's. Up until now, I've never struggled with my weight,

859
00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:33,879
Speaker 1: but now I've gained fifteen pounds seemingly overnight, and I'm

860
00:39:33,880 --> 00:39:35,640
Speaker 1: getting married at the end of this year. I am

861
00:39:35,680 --> 00:39:38,480
Speaker 1: stressed that I won't feel my best on my big day.

862
00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:40,520
Speaker 1: To time you have any tips on how to start

863
00:39:40,520 --> 00:39:43,799
Speaker 1: eating healthier and incorporating more health conscious life choices. I

864
00:39:43,800 --> 00:39:46,600
Speaker 1: am struggling with transitioning from my previous lifestyle to the

865
00:39:46,680 --> 00:39:49,920
Speaker 1: quote granola life, and I'd love any tips on how

866
00:39:49,920 --> 00:39:51,319
Speaker 1: to make the transition easier for me.

867
00:39:52,520 --> 00:39:55,640
Speaker 4: Yes, I am not a medical professional. Yes, However, I

868
00:39:55,680 --> 00:39:57,480
Speaker 4: do feel like I've done a lot of research for

869
00:39:57,560 --> 00:40:01,960
Speaker 4: myself in this and there are two paths. So I

870
00:40:02,200 --> 00:40:04,920
Speaker 4: chose the path of no. I'm trying to avoid taking

871
00:40:04,960 --> 00:40:07,520
Speaker 4: the medication, but there is a path in which you

872
00:40:07,560 --> 00:40:10,520
Speaker 4: could take the medication for your hashemotives, because I read

873
00:40:10,560 --> 00:40:12,880
Speaker 4: that you're getting married with congratulations at the end of

874
00:40:12,880 --> 00:40:16,239
Speaker 4: the year, and I feel like maybe the medication might

875
00:40:16,280 --> 00:40:20,280
Speaker 4: help you speed up the process if that's really important

876
00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:23,000
Speaker 4: to you. So that is an option. The other option

877
00:40:23,200 --> 00:40:27,080
Speaker 4: is the eating habits. I do think they're like, I

878
00:40:27,160 --> 00:40:29,920
Speaker 4: do think there's a way to be gluten Gluten free

879
00:40:30,280 --> 00:40:33,160
Speaker 4: is the biggest thing. It's anti inflammatory, and I think

880
00:40:33,200 --> 00:40:37,600
Speaker 4: anti inflammatory is so good for just general health overall.

881
00:40:38,120 --> 00:40:40,880
Speaker 4: It's good for everything. And so if you could go

882
00:40:40,920 --> 00:40:43,840
Speaker 4: gluten free, I think that would tremendously help with your hashimotos.

883
00:40:44,080 --> 00:40:45,759
Speaker 4: And I do think there's ways to eat gluten free,

884
00:40:45,800 --> 00:40:50,040
Speaker 4: but also still eat a quote unquote like Becca, Like

885
00:40:50,080 --> 00:40:52,279
Speaker 4: you could make gluten free macaroni and cheese. You could

886
00:40:52,320 --> 00:40:56,279
Speaker 4: make gluten free grilled cheese, you could make gluten free tacos.

887
00:40:57,719 --> 00:40:59,040
Speaker 4: I don't know what else. You burger, you can make

888
00:40:59,040 --> 00:41:02,760
Speaker 4: gluten free burger. So you can still make the choices,

889
00:41:02,800 --> 00:41:04,520
Speaker 4: like you still eat what you want to eat, but

890
00:41:04,600 --> 00:41:05,800
Speaker 4: just make them gluten free.

891
00:41:06,440 --> 00:41:08,359
Speaker 2: But I think I think the big thing is because

892
00:41:08,400 --> 00:41:10,840
Speaker 2: like everything you eat, I'm like, that looks delicious, Like

893
00:41:10,960 --> 00:41:14,160
Speaker 2: I would have no problem eating your you're food if

894
00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:17,279
Speaker 2: but it's the commitment of cooking it and like making it.

895
00:41:17,320 --> 00:41:19,080
Speaker 2: So I think, well, how did you get in your

896
00:41:19,080 --> 00:41:21,640
Speaker 2: head of like I can do this on my own,

897
00:41:21,680 --> 00:41:23,359
Speaker 2: because like going out to eat, and like if you're

898
00:41:23,440 --> 00:41:25,840
Speaker 2: used to eating out or like getting fast food, the

899
00:41:25,960 --> 00:41:28,520
Speaker 2: switch to just like cooking at home and making your

900
00:41:28,520 --> 00:41:30,600
Speaker 2: food at home is like drastic.

901
00:41:30,640 --> 00:41:31,920
Speaker 3: I feel like you did that already.

902
00:41:31,960 --> 00:41:34,759
Speaker 4: So yeah, the thing is when you eat out, a

903
00:41:34,800 --> 00:41:37,080
Speaker 4: lot of the time, your food's cooked with canola oil,

904
00:41:37,080 --> 00:41:39,440
Speaker 4: which is like another really big no note. It's like

905
00:41:39,520 --> 00:41:42,719
Speaker 4: very inflammatory. You should be eating with either avocado or

906
00:41:42,800 --> 00:41:46,279
Speaker 4: olive oil. And so if I do got to eat,

907
00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:47,920
Speaker 4: I do ask if they cook the eggs and like

908
00:41:47,960 --> 00:41:51,440
Speaker 4: canola oil, and I'm that girl, I know, but so

909
00:41:51,480 --> 00:41:53,280
Speaker 4: I try to avoid things, So I try to avoid

910
00:41:53,320 --> 00:41:55,239
Speaker 4: things like that. So like, I know, poach eggs, you

911
00:41:55,239 --> 00:41:57,279
Speaker 4: don't need oil, so I'll usually order poached eggs if

912
00:41:57,280 --> 00:42:00,920
Speaker 4: I don't. Yeah, so I try to just like now

913
00:42:00,920 --> 00:42:03,040
Speaker 4: I've kind of outsmarted the system because I hate being

914
00:42:03,080 --> 00:42:05,279
Speaker 4: that customer that's like, do you know if they use

915
00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:08,120
Speaker 4: olive oil in their salad dressing? And like I already

916
00:42:08,160 --> 00:42:10,160
Speaker 4: have to do the whole gluten free thing. I just

917
00:42:10,200 --> 00:42:13,680
Speaker 4: feel like such a pain. But yeah, I do think

918
00:42:13,760 --> 00:42:16,560
Speaker 4: trying to cook more at home it's easier than you think.

919
00:42:17,920 --> 00:42:21,080
Speaker 4: Upping your protein is like a huge thing. And then

920
00:42:21,160 --> 00:42:23,080
Speaker 4: like the seed oils are like a really big I

921
00:42:23,120 --> 00:42:25,800
Speaker 4: feel like starting it feels like I say, starting small,

922
00:42:26,160 --> 00:42:27,440
Speaker 4: but that's actually a lot of stuff.

923
00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:29,360
Speaker 3: Do you know what?

924
00:42:29,480 --> 00:42:32,440
Speaker 2: Though, you shouldn't feel like a pain just trying to

925
00:42:32,440 --> 00:42:35,160
Speaker 2: put good things in your body. Because when we were

926
00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:39,000
Speaker 2: in Europe, it was shocking the difference of like when

927
00:42:39,040 --> 00:42:41,680
Speaker 2: we had questions, they were so like no one acted

928
00:42:41,760 --> 00:42:44,279
Speaker 2: put out by Hayley's food allergies or anything. They're just like,

929
00:42:44,280 --> 00:42:46,359
Speaker 2: oh yeah, okay, this is what we use, and here's

930
00:42:46,400 --> 00:42:48,200
Speaker 2: what you can have, and this is what we can make.

931
00:42:48,480 --> 00:42:53,239
Speaker 2: But like, you shouldn't be annoying by making sure that

932
00:42:53,280 --> 00:42:55,800
Speaker 2: you're not putting something in your body that is harmful

933
00:42:55,800 --> 00:42:57,840
Speaker 2: to your body. We shouldn't be consuming a lot of

934
00:42:57,880 --> 00:42:58,680
Speaker 2: the stuff that we are.

935
00:42:58,800 --> 00:43:01,200
Speaker 4: That's true, that's true. But I do feel like sometimes

936
00:43:01,239 --> 00:43:03,480
Speaker 4: I'm so high maintenance that that's like just eat at home.

937
00:43:03,520 --> 00:43:06,120
Speaker 4: I'm like, I know you, I know, I do.

938
00:43:06,320 --> 00:43:07,279
Speaker 3: I do, Yeah, and you.

939
00:43:07,239 --> 00:43:07,880
Speaker 1: Do I do.

940
00:43:08,000 --> 00:43:10,320
Speaker 2: So I think it's like maybe maybe it's like starting

941
00:43:10,360 --> 00:43:13,960
Speaker 2: out with trying to make at least one meal at

942
00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:16,839
Speaker 2: home and like doing a copycat of something that you

943
00:43:16,880 --> 00:43:19,200
Speaker 2: love that's like gluten free or anti emplanmatory.

944
00:43:19,360 --> 00:43:21,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, and I would just look into you can google

945
00:43:21,440 --> 00:43:24,800
Speaker 4: like hashimotos, different things to do, because like infrared saunas

946
00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:29,680
Speaker 4: are really really good for hashimotos. I just think, again,

947
00:43:29,760 --> 00:43:32,200
Speaker 4: medication is an option, so I think just kind of.

948
00:43:32,280 --> 00:43:33,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, but isn't the whole thing that once you're on

949
00:43:33,920 --> 00:43:35,680
Speaker 3: the medication forever.

950
00:43:35,800 --> 00:43:38,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, That's why I'm hesitant to But she says she's

951
00:43:38,640 --> 00:43:39,840
Speaker 4: getting married at the end of the year, so I

952
00:43:39,840 --> 00:43:41,400
Speaker 4: feel like there might be more of a deadline.

953
00:43:41,800 --> 00:43:44,359
Speaker 2: Well, it sounds like she's stressed about her weight more

954
00:43:44,400 --> 00:43:48,920
Speaker 2: than anything, and you've actually lost weight just by cutting

955
00:43:48,960 --> 00:43:49,560
Speaker 2: out gluten.

956
00:43:49,600 --> 00:43:50,880
Speaker 3: And it is true.

957
00:43:51,000 --> 00:43:54,880
Speaker 4: I lost I really did lose weight, and I wasn't trying.

958
00:43:55,120 --> 00:43:58,120
Speaker 4: It was total just shift in my diet. But it is,

959
00:43:58,239 --> 00:44:01,680
Speaker 4: it's it's I think it's gluten's to the anti inflammatory because

960
00:44:01,719 --> 00:44:03,359
Speaker 4: it really just kind of shrinks you.

961
00:44:04,640 --> 00:44:05,200
Speaker 3: Makes sense.

962
00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:08,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, good luck, Abby, Yeah, good luck.

963
00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:11,320
Speaker 3: And congratulations on your wedding.

964
00:44:12,480 --> 00:44:17,040
Speaker 1: Anonymous says, my boyfriend of six years just told me

965
00:44:17,080 --> 00:44:19,600
Speaker 1: that he cheated on me a few days ago. He

966
00:44:19,719 --> 00:44:22,359
Speaker 1: wanted to take a break to explore and then make

967
00:44:22,360 --> 00:44:24,560
Speaker 1: a decision if you wanted to stay with me, but

968
00:44:24,600 --> 00:44:27,840
Speaker 1: I told him no, we are done. I'm devastated and

969
00:44:27,960 --> 00:44:30,680
Speaker 1: was completely shocked. We had our entire future planned out

970
00:44:30,719 --> 00:44:34,120
Speaker 1: and it feels completely shattered into a million pieces. How

971
00:44:34,160 --> 00:44:36,520
Speaker 1: do I come back from this? Where do I even

972
00:44:36,600 --> 00:44:40,799
Speaker 1: start to meet new guys? Any advice is greatly appreciated.

973
00:44:41,480 --> 00:44:43,839
Speaker 3: Oh that is so.

974
00:44:45,800 --> 00:44:49,880
Speaker 2: Rude. Take a break, to Lauren, then make a decision

975
00:44:49,920 --> 00:44:54,759
Speaker 2: if you're worth it, right, I would say, because I

976
00:44:54,880 --> 00:44:57,960
Speaker 2: feel like, especially when you're in a relationship for a

977
00:44:57,960 --> 00:45:01,239
Speaker 2: long time, there's that feeling of like the thought of

978
00:45:01,320 --> 00:45:03,320
Speaker 2: like where do I begin dating again?

979
00:45:03,680 --> 00:45:05,560
Speaker 3: And I think I think it.

980
00:45:07,080 --> 00:45:09,759
Speaker 2: Just to stay on theme with the podcast, is like

981
00:45:10,200 --> 00:45:13,239
Speaker 2: you should be able to find where can you find

982
00:45:13,280 --> 00:45:16,319
Speaker 2: comfort in yourself, Like getting out of this relationship with

983
00:45:16,360 --> 00:45:20,000
Speaker 2: someone who now has made you trusted for six years

984
00:45:20,040 --> 00:45:22,280
Speaker 2: and now has made you feel like you weren't worthy

985
00:45:22,320 --> 00:45:28,400
Speaker 2: of his loyalty and his trust. You're going to probably

986
00:45:28,440 --> 00:45:31,480
Speaker 2: go through a grieving process of this, really like with

987
00:45:31,560 --> 00:45:34,359
Speaker 2: this relationship, and I think that it's important for you

988
00:45:34,480 --> 00:45:38,360
Speaker 2: to kind of get in touch with yourself again, being

989
00:45:38,400 --> 00:45:44,400
Speaker 2: by yourself, figuring out what you love and what you want,

990
00:45:44,600 --> 00:45:47,719
Speaker 2: and then get into a place where you feel ready

991
00:45:47,760 --> 00:45:49,160
Speaker 2: to give your heart to someone because I think it's

992
00:45:49,200 --> 00:45:50,560
Speaker 2: going to be really scary for.

993
00:45:50,440 --> 00:45:53,719
Speaker 3: You because he betrayed you. Yeah, and you trusted him.

994
00:45:53,760 --> 00:45:55,280
Speaker 2: You thought you were going to be with him forever,

995
00:45:55,960 --> 00:46:01,000
Speaker 2: and now you're in a place where he betrayed that.

996
00:46:01,239 --> 00:46:03,879
Speaker 2: So I think it's I think you give yourself time

997
00:46:03,920 --> 00:46:07,000
Speaker 2: to heal. And I'm so sorry that you're in this position.

998
00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:11,760
Speaker 2: You you were in a long term relationship for before,

999
00:46:12,120 --> 00:46:13,600
Speaker 2: like your long relationship.

1000
00:46:13,640 --> 00:46:14,680
Speaker 4: Yeah he didn't cheat on me.

1001
00:46:14,760 --> 00:46:17,440
Speaker 2: No, No, no, but like getting just in general, like breaking

1002
00:46:17,560 --> 00:46:19,680
Speaker 2: up and like getting out, it's like that feel that

1003
00:46:19,760 --> 00:46:20,520
Speaker 2: fear of Like.

1004
00:46:20,760 --> 00:46:22,759
Speaker 4: Yeah, and I think I remember when I got out

1005
00:46:22,760 --> 00:46:24,880
Speaker 4: of that. I'd never gone to a wedding by myself,

1006
00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:28,239
Speaker 4: I'd never done anything alone. And so but my pendulum

1007
00:46:28,280 --> 00:46:30,560
Speaker 4: swung so far to the side that it was like

1008
00:46:31,120 --> 00:46:33,400
Speaker 4: I preferred doing stuff alone, Like I liked going to

1009
00:46:33,440 --> 00:46:35,759
Speaker 4: events alone. I liked doing stuff alone. Like I think

1010
00:46:35,760 --> 00:46:39,880
Speaker 4: I got a little too comfortable in the aloness.

1011
00:46:39,880 --> 00:46:40,560
Speaker 3: I always wanted.

1012
00:46:40,880 --> 00:46:43,160
Speaker 2: That's not true, Like maybe you got comfortable with it,

1013
00:46:43,200 --> 00:46:46,000
Speaker 2: but you were always hopeful for it to find a yah.

1014
00:46:46,040 --> 00:46:48,160
Speaker 4: But I always I knew there's a thing, the desire,

1015
00:46:48,200 --> 00:46:49,759
Speaker 4: a desire. It was always a desire of my heart

1016
00:46:49,840 --> 00:46:53,719
Speaker 4: to like be married, have a lifelong partner, have kids,

1017
00:46:53,760 --> 00:46:55,719
Speaker 4: Like that's always been a desire of my heart. So

1018
00:46:56,360 --> 00:46:59,080
Speaker 4: I actively pursued that. Does that make sense? So, like

1019
00:46:59,120 --> 00:47:00,960
Speaker 4: I kept dating even though it sucked, and like I

1020
00:47:01,040 --> 00:47:08,239
Speaker 4: kept getting just lots of failed attempts. I knew that

1021
00:47:08,239 --> 00:47:11,720
Speaker 4: that was something that was going to come to me eventually. Uh,

1022
00:47:11,760 --> 00:47:14,759
Speaker 4: And I wanted that so much. But maybe if you've

1023
00:47:14,760 --> 00:47:19,560
Speaker 4: been maybe that's not what you want. Anonymous what's not

1024
00:47:19,600 --> 00:47:21,400
Speaker 4: what she wants. Maybe she doesn't want to be married,

1025
00:47:21,800 --> 00:47:24,920
Speaker 4: maybe that's not what she wants. Maybe, oh, maybe she

1026
00:47:25,000 --> 00:47:28,759
Speaker 4: just wants to be like flung around a little, you

1027
00:47:28,760 --> 00:47:29,239
Speaker 4: know what I mean.

1028
00:47:29,239 --> 00:47:30,520
Speaker 3: I'm note wants to be.

1029
00:47:31,520 --> 00:47:33,680
Speaker 2: I think she feels flung around right now, And I

1030
00:47:33,719 --> 00:47:36,200
Speaker 2: don't know if that's what she's gonna want, right I

1031
00:47:36,239 --> 00:47:39,040
Speaker 2: think that she's probably gonna want to feel safe and

1032
00:47:39,080 --> 00:47:43,200
Speaker 2: stable and protect and cared for. So I think that

1033
00:47:43,320 --> 00:47:46,200
Speaker 2: you do that for yourself, lean into your friendships, lean

1034
00:47:46,239 --> 00:47:49,640
Speaker 2: into the things that do make you feel safe and

1035
00:47:49,680 --> 00:47:52,200
Speaker 2: loved and cared for. And I think when your heart

1036
00:47:52,239 --> 00:47:54,719
Speaker 2: feels ready to put yourself out there to date again,

1037
00:47:55,239 --> 00:47:58,279
Speaker 2: you go out do things that you enjoy where there's

1038
00:47:58,400 --> 00:48:01,040
Speaker 2: other people there. You get involved where there's community.

1039
00:48:01,200 --> 00:48:02,799
Speaker 4: Yeah, because she said, where do I even start to

1040
00:48:02,840 --> 00:48:05,400
Speaker 4: meet new guys? And I feel like the world is

1041
00:48:05,400 --> 00:48:07,920
Speaker 4: our oyster these days. Like you can meet people on Instagram,

1042
00:48:07,960 --> 00:48:09,719
Speaker 4: you can meet people on dating apps, you can bet people.

1043
00:48:09,840 --> 00:48:12,879
Speaker 1: True, but I think she needs time more than anything else.

1044
00:48:12,880 --> 00:48:15,319
Speaker 4: I agree, But but where you meet them is like

1045
00:48:16,000 --> 00:48:17,120
Speaker 4: anywhere anyway.

1046
00:48:17,200 --> 00:48:19,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, I wouldn't sign up for an app at this point.

1047
00:48:19,200 --> 00:48:21,480
Speaker 1: I would just let let yourself heal for a while

1048
00:48:21,600 --> 00:48:23,920
Speaker 1: and get to know who you are without him, because

1049
00:48:23,920 --> 00:48:25,760
Speaker 1: you don't know that person it's been six years.

1050
00:48:26,000 --> 00:48:28,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, Yeah, so I agree with that.

1051
00:48:29,040 --> 00:48:31,560
Speaker 2: And if you if you're like I am just in

1052
00:48:31,600 --> 00:48:33,279
Speaker 2: the mood for a rebound and I don't want to

1053
00:48:33,280 --> 00:48:35,520
Speaker 2: do anything safe and that feels like what you need to.

1054
00:48:35,440 --> 00:48:38,960
Speaker 4: Do, do it, do it, but.

1055
00:48:38,239 --> 00:48:39,360
Speaker 3: But don't take care of yourself.

1056
00:48:40,440 --> 00:48:42,879
Speaker 1: The decision you made with him, You made the right call. Yeah,

1057
00:48:42,880 --> 00:48:43,160
Speaker 1: And she.

1058
00:48:44,840 --> 00:48:46,720
Speaker 3: Is not a reflection of your value.

1059
00:48:47,880 --> 00:48:50,319
Speaker 4: And also, I know this is going to be hard,

1060
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:53,319
Speaker 4: but try not to take that experience into your next

1061
00:48:53,360 --> 00:48:56,520
Speaker 4: relationship and be very like, don't have your guard up

1062
00:48:56,640 --> 00:48:59,120
Speaker 4: and don't like, don't put those trust issues from your

1063
00:48:59,120 --> 00:49:01,680
Speaker 4: ex onto your future partner.

1064
00:49:02,560 --> 00:49:07,319
Speaker 2: That's true, because that will happen, Yeah, unless you let

1065
00:49:07,400 --> 00:49:08,400
Speaker 2: yourself heal from this.

1066
00:49:08,640 --> 00:49:10,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, And that might look ugly.

1067
00:49:10,280 --> 00:49:12,480
Speaker 2: It might be like anger, it might be rage, it

1068
00:49:12,560 --> 00:49:16,839
Speaker 2: might be like sadness and grief. But let yourself feel

1069
00:49:16,840 --> 00:49:22,400
Speaker 2: those things because it's important to get it out now. Yeah,

1070
00:49:22,640 --> 00:49:25,000
Speaker 2: we have a fun episode coming up on Thursday.

1071
00:49:25,040 --> 00:49:27,160
Speaker 3: We're doing something we've never done before.

1072
00:49:27,440 --> 00:49:29,200
Speaker 4: It's gonna be more of like a mini episode. If

1073
00:49:29,239 --> 00:49:29,839
Speaker 4: you will And.

1074
00:49:29,760 --> 00:49:31,960
Speaker 1: By the way, if people have ideas for what the

1075
00:49:32,000 --> 00:49:34,719
Speaker 1: Thursday episode should be, they should contribute them because we

1076
00:49:34,719 --> 00:49:37,319
Speaker 1: want to do different stuff. Yeah, we did games for

1077
00:49:37,360 --> 00:49:39,160
Speaker 1: a while, we did guests for a while, and we'll

1078
00:49:39,160 --> 00:49:41,600
Speaker 1: still do some guests. But we're open to ideas.

1079
00:49:41,800 --> 00:49:46,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, we're open to suggestions, So if you have any,

1080
00:49:46,960 --> 00:49:47,440
Speaker 2: let us know.

1081
00:49:48,239 --> 00:49:49,439
Speaker 4: But I'm in the Facebook group.

1082
00:49:49,640 --> 00:49:54,240
Speaker 2: But this Thursday, we are going back to two thousand

1083
00:49:54,360 --> 00:49:58,800
Speaker 2: and seventeen. The year is twenty seventeen. It is episode

1084
00:49:58,840 --> 00:50:03,160
Speaker 2: seven of Scrubbing In with Bechetillian on Your AD and

1085
00:50:04,080 --> 00:50:08,520
Speaker 2: it is a wild change that has happened to us

1086
00:50:08,520 --> 00:50:11,759
Speaker 2: as people since this episode. So we're going to be

1087
00:50:12,320 --> 00:50:15,040
Speaker 2: recapping it. If you want to listen, it's episode seven

1088
00:50:15,120 --> 00:50:18,280
Speaker 2: Scrubbing In with Bectillians on your AD and it's.

1089
00:50:18,120 --> 00:50:20,480
Speaker 4: Called Annual check Up is the title of.

1090
00:50:20,440 --> 00:50:23,759
Speaker 2: The episode, and it has some gems in there. So

1091
00:50:23,800 --> 00:50:26,239
Speaker 2: we're going to be kind of just recapping it and

1092
00:50:26,280 --> 00:50:29,480
Speaker 2: like rehashing who we were as people during that time.

1093
00:50:29,560 --> 00:50:31,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, and I remember you referenced somebody you called him

1094
00:50:32,040 --> 00:50:34,719
Speaker 4: Arnold Swartz, and yeah, I don't even remember who that was,

1095
00:50:35,520 --> 00:50:35,759
Speaker 4: do you?

1096
00:50:36,000 --> 00:50:36,359
Speaker 3: I think?

1097
00:50:36,440 --> 00:50:38,160
Speaker 4: So all right, we'll get into it.

1098
00:50:38,239 --> 00:50:41,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, So we'll be back Thursday with that and we

1099
00:50:41,680 --> 00:50:45,040
Speaker 2: hope you have a wonderful week and we love you

1100
00:50:45,080 --> 00:50:45,439
Speaker 2: so much.

1101
00:50:45,840 --> 00:50:55,640
Speaker 3: Bye bye,