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Speaker 1: It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if

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Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, on dating, work, sex, parenting,

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Speaker 1: and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to STEVEVARBFM dot

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Speaker 1: com and click submit Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 2: We could be reading your letter live.

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Speaker 1: On the air, just like we're going to read this

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Speaker 1: one right here, right now, and you never know, it

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Speaker 1: could be yours.

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Speaker 3: It could be yours. Buck love on hold on time.

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Speaker 3: We got it for you here it is Strawberry.

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Speaker 1: Let them all right if you thank you subject Being

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Speaker 1: healthy doesn't work for everybody.

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Speaker 2: Stephen Shirley.

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Speaker 1: Late last year, my husband and I decided to get

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Speaker 1: in better physical and spiritual shape. He got baptized and

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Speaker 1: I fully supported him. We became Pescatarians and it helped

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Speaker 1: him lose fourteen pounds so far. Pescatarians you eat only fish.

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Speaker 1: You eat vegetables and all that other stuff, but yeah,

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Speaker 1: your meat is fish. I am petite and I have

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Speaker 1: never had a problem with my weight, but I do

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Speaker 1: love making healthier food choices. I think my husband takes

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Speaker 1: everything too far. Though he has removed things from his

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Speaker 1: life that he needs, like the skincare he used last year.

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Speaker 1: It's a must for him because he has hair bumps.

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Speaker 1: Now he uses a homemade salve that doesn't work at

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Speaker 1: all to exfoliate his skin. He's also been using an

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Speaker 1: all natural deodorant and that doesn't work on his body.

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Speaker 1: He needs all of the aluminum and other sad stuff

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Speaker 1: that was in his old deodorant.

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Speaker 2: Before because it worked.

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Speaker 1: We work out together, so it's hard riding back home

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Speaker 1: in the car with him. Since he switched his deodorants.

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Speaker 1: He does most of the cooking, and he switched to

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Speaker 1: salt free seasonings and he uses a lot of garlic

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Speaker 1: for everything. If I offered a cook he stands over

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Speaker 1: me and tells me how to season the food. Our

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Speaker 1: intimacy has changed too. He doesn't want me on birth

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Speaker 1: control because it's not natural. The method he's chosen to

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Speaker 1: use is not full proof, and I'm always paranoid that

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Speaker 1: I'll get pregnant. We've made it clear that we don't

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Speaker 1: want kids, so he's playing a dangerous game. After six

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Speaker 1: years of marriage, I'm still not comfortable telling him that

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Speaker 1: he smells bad and that his cooking is bland. I

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Speaker 1: need him to get his skin together as well. Don't

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Speaker 1: get me wrong. Being healthy is ideal, But he needs

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Speaker 1: to tweak some things. How do I tell him that, yes,

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Speaker 1: you are right, being healthy is ideal, that's what we

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Speaker 1: all strive for, being in our best health. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: you need to tweak a lot of things. And you

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Speaker 1: just got to tell him. I mean, there's no way

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Speaker 1: around this. You have to tell him that he smells bad.

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Speaker 1: You have to don't crush him with it, though. I mean,

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Speaker 1: you just got to find a kind way, if there

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Speaker 1: is one to tell him. I mean, is there a

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Speaker 1: nice way to tell someone that they stink? Do your research,

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Speaker 1: find some other deodorants for him. I mean, look into

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Speaker 1: some more skin products. You got to do this for him.

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Speaker 1: You got to buy them. You got to ask him

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Speaker 1: to try the new ones, and then get some taste

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Speaker 1: of your seasonings. Gets you know, you got to put

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Speaker 1: some salt on your food. That's what brings the flavor out.

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Speaker 1: And what do you mean he stands over you while

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Speaker 1: you're cooking. Just ask him to have a seat and

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Speaker 1: tell him you got this. And why after six years

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Speaker 1: are you uncomfortable still to tell your husband things? You

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Speaker 1: you know, you you got up the courage to write us,

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Speaker 1: and it's gonna take that same boldness to let him

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Speaker 1: know how you feel. I just say, don't crush and

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Speaker 1: be nice about it. Start and end with some sort

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Speaker 1: of compliment like honey, you look good. I'm proud of you,

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Speaker 1: you know. Then hit them with the I found these products.

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Speaker 1: They may work better for you because the ones you're

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Speaker 1: using aren't doing the job. They are not working. And

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Speaker 1: then I like the other skin products you use because

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Speaker 1: the skin is soft. Your skin is soft and smooth

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Speaker 1: with no hair bumps. But you gotta, you know, mix

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Speaker 1: it in. You know, you got to tell them nicely,

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Speaker 1: all right, don't just blast him out.

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Speaker 2: The key is how you say it.

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Speaker 1: Now, what you say, and I think you can do

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Speaker 1: this this, But why are you scared to talk to

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Speaker 1: your husband after six years? You say he's playing a

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Speaker 1: dangerous game with the with the birth control situation. No,

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Speaker 1: you're playing a dangerous game. It's your body. And if

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Speaker 1: you guys have decided not to have kids, you guys

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Speaker 1: got to work on this. Tommy.

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Speaker 3: In the words of a gentleman in my grandmother's neighborhood

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Speaker 3: when I was growing up, Books and Bibles was his name,

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Speaker 3: and Books and Bibles used to roll up and say, man.

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Speaker 2: It's a low down and fulky deal.

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Speaker 3: Never knew what that meant, but we called him books

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Speaker 3: and bibles, and as soon as he come up on you,

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Speaker 3: he be man. It's a lowdown and fulky deal. This

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Speaker 3: is a low down and fulky deal because you got

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Speaker 3: a situation. Now your man stink. I tell all I

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Speaker 3: can die. I'm smelling this. Do the letter to let

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Speaker 3: us think that y'all don't smell all this. All this

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Speaker 3: stink the and I'm probably while y'all cooking in the kitchen.

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Speaker 3: He's stank. When y'all in the bedroom, he's stank. When

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Speaker 3: y'all at the gym, he's stank. And if y'all bring

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Speaker 3: a baby in as well, the baby gonna stank everything.

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Speaker 3: This just this, ah, this stanks. This just thanks right here,

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Speaker 3: we got to figure out how to get some deodorant

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Speaker 3: up under his arm. And I listen while he's sleep,

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Speaker 3: I'm just saying this while he's sleep. I think you

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Speaker 3: should get that old white jaw with that red top

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Speaker 3: that touts the deodorant and put that just paste it

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Speaker 3: up under his arm so he can start smelling a

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Speaker 3: little bit better. This right here is bad. You gotta

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Speaker 3: have that conversation. It's time to have a conversation when

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Speaker 3: you're with but this show. This is not your this

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Speaker 3: is not your boyfriend, it's not somebody you dating. This

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Speaker 3: is your husband. This is the person you laying next

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Speaker 3: to every night. This is your man. So you got

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Speaker 3: to be able to y'all got to be close enough

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Speaker 3: the baby and say, baby, we got to sit down

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Speaker 3: and have this top. Baby. You stank. You stank in

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Speaker 3: the fact when he started coming in the house, start

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Speaker 3: playing stuff like when the funk hit the fan and

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Speaker 3: the people want to come on play that make my

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Speaker 3: funk the p funk. I wants to get funked up.

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Speaker 3: You got to start playing stuff he can relate to

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Speaker 3: and understand. Brother, you funky. It's a lowdown and funky deal,

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Speaker 3: and that's where you are. Man. It's just it's a dimi.

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Speaker 3: It's a load down and bunker deal. We got to

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Speaker 3: get your husband some deodorant. We got to get I

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Speaker 3: don't know what we got to do with this, he

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Speaker 3: breaking out. I don't know what we're gonna do about

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Speaker 3: this ex man. We gotta figure that part out too.

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Speaker 3: But that's what he got. Sure, that's what it is.

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Speaker 3: That's what that is, I know it when I hear

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Speaker 3: that's ell. Hang up.

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Speaker 1: We'll have part two of our response to today's Strawberry

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Speaker 1: Letter at twenty three minutes after the hour funk.

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Speaker 2: Right after this, people, come on, get with me. You're

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Speaker 2: listening hard morning show. Do you think astronauts fight over

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Speaker 2: elbow room?

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Speaker 3: on several factors.

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Speaker 1: All right, we're going to recap today's Strawberry letter. The

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Speaker 1: subject that is being healthy doesn't work for everybody. A

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Speaker 1: woman wrote in. She and her husband have been married

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Speaker 1: for six years. She says late last year she and

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Speaker 1: her husband decided to get in better physical and spiritual shape.

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Speaker 1: He joined church. She supported him one hundred percent. Then

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Speaker 1: they changed their diet. They became pescatarians. So far, he's

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Speaker 1: lost fourteen pounds. She's fatigue. She's never had a problem

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Speaker 1: with her weight, but she does like make healthier food choices.

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Speaker 1: She says she thinks her husband takes everything too far,

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Speaker 1: though you know, it's just to the extreme.

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Speaker 2: He stopped wearing his same deodorant. Now he smells badly.

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Speaker 1: He stopped, he made some homemade sab for his beard,

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Speaker 1: and now he has hair bumps. He doesn't cook with

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Speaker 1: salt anymore. And all of this, she says, it's just

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Speaker 1: too much and too far. He uses garlic for everything.

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Speaker 1: If she offers to cook, he stands over the stove

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Speaker 1: and checks and watches everything she does. And you know,

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Speaker 1: and then he doesn't want her to use birth control

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Speaker 1: because they've tried to. They don't want to have children.

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Speaker 1: They both said they don't want children. So if she's

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Speaker 1: she stopped, and she says he's playing a dangerous game.

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Speaker 1: But again, they've been married for six years and she's

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Speaker 1: still uncomfortable telling him about how he smells and other

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Speaker 1: bads and other things. So she's saying, don't get her wrong,

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Speaker 1: being healthy is ideal, but she wants to know how

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Speaker 1: should she tell him that he's sticking Junior.

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Speaker 2: You know what Charley call it this Tommy.

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Speaker 5: These the people that get on my nerves, These people

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Speaker 5: who been a Christian eight hours.

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Speaker 6: And try to tell everybody how to live.

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Speaker 5: Because ever since you got baptized, now we all fish.

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Speaker 5: Ever since you on baptized, now we can't wear at

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Speaker 5: the yodery I ever said you that got baptized. I

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Speaker 5: mean everything. I gotta be on birth joy, never looking

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Speaker 5: at your old false nothing just everything wrong with me. See,

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Speaker 5: I can't stand there with this has to stop. You

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Speaker 5: have to go get unbaptized. You was fine, he was fine.

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Speaker 5: Just go unbaptized him. We asked you to follow Jesus,

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Speaker 5: not smell like Jesus. We ain't ask you to do

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Speaker 5: all that. What we asked you to follow Jesus, not

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Speaker 5: try to smell like Jesus.

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Speaker 6: We asked you to do all that follow him.

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Speaker 2: That's different.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, because Lord did half old spies back then, we do.

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Speaker 5: You ain't never heard nobody say, you know we took

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Speaker 5: him out, old spice that killed him right there, that

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Speaker 5: old spies got him.

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Speaker 6: You know, we ain't never heard.

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Speaker 5: We ain't never heard season because now you're cooking all

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Speaker 5: that's playing. Ain't nobody ever said, Ain't nobody ever said

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Speaker 5: lowrys and onions, onion powder got him, That's what that

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Speaker 5: way it went wrong.

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Speaker 6: I ain't never heard nobody say it was that last

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Speaker 6: t ball service.

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Speaker 5: Next said he got here. This is too much you ain't.

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Speaker 5: I've seen these people all the time. They want to

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Speaker 5: tell you everything that's wrong with you. Now you stand

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Speaker 5: over your wife's shoulder as she cooked.

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Speaker 6: The way she wants to cook. Well, see, you think

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Speaker 6: everybody love missus Dash.

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Speaker 5: Don't nobody really want missus Dash? That season ain't got

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Speaker 5: nothing in it, nothing sodium, but it does nothing for fish.

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Speaker 6: Yes, anybody was just eat.

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Speaker 2: Fish, just cook it.

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Speaker 5: Just take a catfish and throw it out the oven.

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Speaker 3: Just eat.

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Speaker 5: You'll be able to tell everything about that catfish. Spend

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Speaker 5: ten years down on the delta, you did, She.

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Speaker 6: Had one hundred and twenty five catfishy birth. Yeah, you

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Speaker 6: can found everything.

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Speaker 5: Plus where I was high because you tasted everything wrong

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Speaker 5: with this fit. You ain't seizing nothing. This don't make

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Speaker 5: no sense. I can't stand these people. You want to

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Speaker 5: tell me how to live and don't work. Don't nobody

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Speaker 5: care nothing about this man? What she should do is

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Speaker 5: take that that deal that he wear and then just

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Speaker 5: get a bottle of old spice to take the top

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Speaker 5: off of that and put on the one that some

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Speaker 5: way you'll know.

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Speaker 6: Ain't nobody said they're illuminum in old spice killed me.

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Speaker 5: Ain't nobody ever died from being fresh. I've not heard one,

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Speaker 5: certain I've not heard one cause of death because somebody bathed.

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Speaker 5: I've never heard that.

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Speaker 6: Why did he die?

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Speaker 5: Taking Nick said he bathed himself to death. I've never

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Speaker 5: heard that. He can't leaning he had hot water and

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Speaker 5: a bubble bath and he took him out. He just

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Speaker 5: don't make no sense to live like this.

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Speaker 2: No, it doesn't, no whatsoever.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but why is she still uncomfortable after six years?

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Speaker 2: Talking to your husband is a problem? Why why is

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Speaker 2: that a problem?

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Speaker 5: He just self because he's been a Christian eight our

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Speaker 5: he's doing brand new.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, he's brand new. We got the same thing on

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Speaker 6: a bishop a war. You were in the same army.

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Speaker 5: You ain't you ain't you sitting out here with us,

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Speaker 5: but you was like you were long up there. You

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Speaker 5: can't you've been a Christian eight out.

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Speaker 6: This don't make no sense. Now you ain't got the

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Speaker 6: homemade piece of meeting from he no pork type of

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Speaker 6: front of him losing.

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Speaker 1: What about the homemade stab he made instead of using

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Speaker 1: his skincare regiment?

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Speaker 2: What about that? Once again, once.

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Speaker 6: Again I'm not heard of.

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Speaker 5: Somebody die and not one I have not heard that

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Speaker 5: I love.

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Speaker 3: Oh my gosh.

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Speaker 6: He was rubbing his face and he fell to the flow.

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Speaker 6: Was next handy? That has not that has not happened you.

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Speaker 2: No, you're coming from today. Strubbery put on This Morning

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Speaker 2: and Steve Harvey.

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Speaker 1: Have them on Instagram and on Facebook, and check out

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Speaker 1: the Strawberry Letter podcast on the free iHeartRadio app.

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Speaker 2: Free Never Sounded So good. You can download it.

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Speaker 1: Today you're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show