WEBVTT - Red Table Talk: The Estefans - Black & Latin: Racism Within 0:00:00.440 --> 0:00:03.680 This is Roxanne Gay, the host of The Roxanne Gay Agenda, 0:00:03.960 --> 0:00:07.520 the bad feminist podcast of Your Dreams. Each week I 0:00:07.640 --> 0:00:12.360 talked to an interesting person about feminism, race, writing in books, 0:00:12.400 --> 0:00:16.720 and art, food, pop culture, and yes, politics, we can't 0:00:16.800 --> 0:00:21.520 escape politics. Listen to the Luminary original podcast The Roxanne 0:00:21.520 --> 0:00:24.800 Gay Agenda every Tuesday on the I Heart Radio app, 0:00:25.079 --> 0:00:31.040 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm 0:00:31.160 --> 0:00:34.240 Robert sex Reese, host of The Doctor Sex re Show. 0:00:34.640 --> 0:00:37.639 And every episode I listened to people talk about their 0:00:37.680 --> 0:00:41.560 sex and intimacy issues, and yes, I despise every minute 0:00:41.560 --> 0:00:46.000 of it. And she she made mistakes too, everyone at 0:00:46.000 --> 0:00:48.919 her wedding. But hell is real. We're all trapped here 0:00:49.240 --> 0:00:51.479 and there's nothing any of us can do about it. 0:00:51.760 --> 0:00:54.600 So join me, won't you? Listen to The Doctors Sex 0:00:54.680 --> 0:00:57.320 re Show every Tuesday on the I Heart Radio app, 0:00:57.360 --> 0:01:01.840 Apple podcast or wherever you get your podcast. The NFL 0:01:01.880 --> 0:01:04.920 Podcast Network is your home for all things football. Do 0:01:04.959 --> 0:01:07.399 you love hearing analysis around the league with a touch 0:01:07.400 --> 0:01:10.920 of mirth, Or maybe you enjoy breaking down, exit and 0:01:11.000 --> 0:01:15.000 nose in the college scouting scene. Do you breathe, sleep, 0:01:15.080 --> 0:01:19.000 and eat fantasy football? Perhaps you love the funny headlines 0:01:19.000 --> 0:01:21.679 that emerge each week. 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Let 0:02:02.960 --> 0:02:05.200 say don't go outside and don't darken at my family. 0:02:06.000 --> 0:02:08.440 And I still get emotional right now because you think 0:02:08.680 --> 0:02:12.560 I'm a kid. After Latinos speak out about the discrimination 0:02:12.639 --> 0:02:20.080 they face within their own community. Because Latino, whatever it is, 0:02:20.320 --> 0:02:24.440 it doesn't look like me. Our culture secret exposed at 0:02:24.440 --> 0:02:26.600 the Red Table. A lot of us are very hypocrite. 0:02:26.880 --> 0:02:32.160 Why why there is racism? They don't pretend to like 0:02:32.440 --> 0:02:45.000 us and really not like us. Latino that is a 0:02:45.120 --> 0:02:49.000 term that unites all Latinos, regardless of nationality or skin color. 0:02:49.320 --> 0:02:52.079 It's about a shared culture and a sense of belonging. 0:02:52.360 --> 0:02:55.600 But let's be clear, being Latino is not a race. 0:02:56.000 --> 0:03:00.480 There are black Latinos, white Latinos in every shade in between. 0:03:01.000 --> 0:03:04.640 One in four US Hispanics identify as Afro Latino, and 0:03:04.680 --> 0:03:08.920 two thirds of Hispanics with darker skin colors report discrimination. 0:03:09.480 --> 0:03:13.880 Common Yet racist phrases such as major lassa or improving 0:03:13.919 --> 0:03:18.720 the race encourage generations of Latinos to value European features 0:03:18.720 --> 0:03:22.760 and skin tone. One survey showed that of dark skinned 0:03:22.760 --> 0:03:30.399 individuals were viewed as less intelligent and therefore less worthy. 0:03:31.120 --> 0:03:39.200 Let go what case is silk hood. This is what 0:03:39.360 --> 0:03:42.480 colorism looks like. It may not be something we want 0:03:42.520 --> 0:03:45.600 to acknowledge, but that's exactly why we wanted to bring 0:03:45.640 --> 0:03:49.560 it to the table. We cannot know what it's like 0:03:50.080 --> 0:03:54.000 to be in the skin of darker Latinos because we 0:03:54.000 --> 0:03:57.240 were born like this. In Latino families, you can have 0:03:57.320 --> 0:03:59.920 someone with very dark skin, you could have someone with 0:04:00.080 --> 0:04:01.880 very light skin, and they can be brother and sister. 0:04:02.360 --> 0:04:05.800 That dynamic within the family can cause your family to 0:04:05.840 --> 0:04:08.200 treat you different. People looking from the outside to treat 0:04:08.200 --> 0:04:10.520 you different, which is why we need to use this 0:04:10.600 --> 0:04:14.480 platform to amplify this issue because I don't know what 0:04:14.520 --> 0:04:17.280 that feels like. It breaks my heart to think that 0:04:17.320 --> 0:04:22.080 after Latinos feel racism in their own family because you 0:04:22.120 --> 0:04:25.279 think of racism as a general thing in society or 0:04:25.279 --> 0:04:28.920 we need happens in your own family. Is very difficult. 0:04:29.360 --> 0:04:33.919 Is that feeling of being the trauma of being oppressed. 0:04:34.279 --> 0:04:37.960 As humans, we tend to get close to what makes 0:04:38.040 --> 0:04:41.560 us comfortable, and sometimes we treat different as less then, 0:04:41.960 --> 0:04:44.760 and that is one of the biggest issues in the world. 0:04:44.920 --> 0:04:46.800 This is something that needs to be gutted from the 0:04:46.800 --> 0:04:49.560 inside out because they're dealing with things in their life 0:04:49.640 --> 0:04:52.839 that we will never know merely as a result of 0:04:52.920 --> 0:04:55.720 the color of their skin. Here we go, girls. Caramel 0:04:56.000 --> 0:04:58.400 is best known as the culture expert on the hit 0:04:58.480 --> 0:05:00.880 show Queer Eye, which I love. But what you may 0:05:00.920 --> 0:05:05.120 not know is that Catamo's grandmother was Cuban. For most 0:05:05.160 --> 0:05:07.680 of his life, he rejected his Latin roots because of 0:05:07.720 --> 0:05:11.279 the racism he felt within his own family. Welcome to 0:05:11.320 --> 0:05:17.800 the table, baby, I am loving this switter. Thank you. 0:05:18.240 --> 0:05:19.880 I appreciate it so much. I was trying to be 0:05:19.880 --> 0:05:23.720 a little sexy and at your grandma's Cuban. Yes, and 0:05:23.880 --> 0:05:29.560 in opening Jamaica, Yes, Ja Jamaica. Yeah, and she uh lighter, Yes, 0:05:29.680 --> 0:05:32.360 she she was, but she was lighter growing up. I 0:05:32.480 --> 0:05:35.520 felt very embarrassed even today, to be honest, talking to 0:05:35.600 --> 0:05:37.640 the producers and talking to people, every time they refer 0:05:37.680 --> 0:05:40.240 to me as Afro Latino or Latino, I get very 0:05:40.320 --> 0:05:42.880 uncomfortable still to this same something new. It's very new. 0:05:43.080 --> 0:05:47.480 Your Latino family did not accept you. Not accept sounds deliberate. 0:05:47.920 --> 0:05:49.800 I don't think they understood what they were doing, but 0:05:49.880 --> 0:05:56.680 it was this subliminal, unconscious, internalized racism that was in them. 0:05:56.880 --> 0:05:59.599 Do you feel like within your family if somebody's lighter, 0:06:00.000 --> 0:06:01.720 you know, they'll joke and be like, oh, you know, 0:06:01.720 --> 0:06:03.720 because you're the darker one and I'm the lighter one. 0:06:03.800 --> 0:06:07.040 And that of course, of course, for me, playing outside 0:06:07.080 --> 0:06:11.920 as a kid was nerve wracking because my grandmother would say, 0:06:12.160 --> 0:06:14.719 don't go outside and don't darken up my family. Don't 0:06:14.800 --> 0:06:16.840 darken up my family. Don't darken up my family. So 0:06:16.960 --> 0:06:19.480 I would not go outside until after five pm because 0:06:19.520 --> 0:06:21.600 then the sun would be less. And I still get 0:06:21.640 --> 0:06:26.040 emotional right now because you think I'm a kid and 0:06:26.160 --> 0:06:29.000 I should not have to be thinking about not going 0:06:29.120 --> 0:06:32.680 outside and playing because I don't want to get darker 0:06:32.960 --> 0:06:35.400 so that my grandmother doesn't say a comment. Maybe she 0:06:35.520 --> 0:06:38.080 even thought she was trying to protect it, and that's 0:06:38.080 --> 0:06:42.920 what it was, and in her mind to think that 0:06:43.000 --> 0:06:45.200 it was going to be better for you to be lighter. 0:06:45.560 --> 0:06:48.520 Her intention was to protect me, to to try to 0:06:48.560 --> 0:06:50.280 say things that she thought was going to help me. 0:06:50.520 --> 0:06:53.520 But the impact is that it destroyed me emotionally. But 0:06:53.640 --> 0:06:55.600 it also made me feel like I wasn't connected to 0:06:55.640 --> 0:07:03.520 my culture intentions. In fact, that is huge my families 0:07:03.560 --> 0:07:06.200 to say, oh, your nose, and my grandmother even my 0:07:06.360 --> 0:07:10.280 mother would squeeze my nose as but it was because 0:07:10.320 --> 0:07:12.840 it's more my nose is more African, my nose is 0:07:12.920 --> 0:07:16.360 more black. And for many years, I kept saying to myself, 0:07:16.480 --> 0:07:18.640 I need to know Jack. I did not know where 0:07:18.760 --> 0:07:22.000 that internalized hatred I had for myself was coming from 0:07:22.600 --> 0:07:25.040 your drama. I mean, we don't realize it, but you 0:07:25.120 --> 0:07:27.280 know it starts with the family that people around you. 0:07:27.440 --> 0:07:30.320 You know, like those experiences are going to mark you 0:07:30.400 --> 0:07:32.280 for the rest of your life. I'm the only boy. 0:07:32.320 --> 0:07:34.960 I have sisters and they range from very light to 0:07:35.240 --> 0:07:37.920 I have one sister who's the darkest and her treatment 0:07:38.240 --> 0:07:40.960 was the worst. The reason that I am the person 0:07:41.080 --> 0:07:44.480 on Queer Eye that has the emotional and mental conversations 0:07:44.880 --> 0:07:48.440 is because I understand the trauma and damage where maybe, 0:07:48.760 --> 0:07:51.440 and not to discount my sisters who are lighter, they 0:07:51.480 --> 0:07:55.960 didn't experience because they were Benita. There were all these 0:07:56.040 --> 0:07:59.080 things that were for me. I didn't hear those things 0:07:59.280 --> 0:08:08.120 as often. But you're gorgeous, appreciated. Have you ever been 0:08:08.200 --> 0:08:11.280 told that you couldn't possibly be Latino because you're blank? Yes, 0:08:11.600 --> 0:08:13.640 it wasn't even a question. It's immediately like no, no, no, 0:08:13.720 --> 0:08:16.560 you're Jamaican, there's no Cuban, And it's an easy way 0:08:16.640 --> 0:08:18.720 just to dismiss me and discriminate me. That's why I 0:08:18.800 --> 0:08:20.840 love what you're doing here, because there's so many people 0:08:20.880 --> 0:08:22.880 who are going to watch you here this for the 0:08:22.920 --> 0:08:26.080 first time and say, oh, this is a problem. Maybe 0:08:26.160 --> 0:08:28.280 I shouldn't be making these comments. And so what I 0:08:28.400 --> 0:08:31.600 love about this conversation is that for those individuals who 0:08:31.640 --> 0:08:35.360 are experiencing their mental health, their emotional health being damaged, 0:08:35.840 --> 0:08:37.920 this is a moment where you can understand that you 0:08:38.000 --> 0:08:40.160 are beautiful as you are because it's a journey that 0:08:40.280 --> 0:08:43.520 I'm going on right now to love myself because of 0:08:43.559 --> 0:08:46.880 the internalized racism that I heard and experienced from my 0:08:47.040 --> 0:08:49.679 Latin side. But I started to say, I have to 0:08:49.720 --> 0:08:52.839 build myself back up. Conversations like this where I look 0:08:52.920 --> 0:08:55.160 at you all and you look like people my family, 0:08:55.559 --> 0:08:58.440 and you're affirming me for the first time, It's like, Okay, 0:08:58.480 --> 0:09:02.160 I'm getting chills, I'm getting emotional. It's like I feel included. 0:09:03.000 --> 0:09:06.280 You have to go through a process after trauma to 0:09:06.480 --> 0:09:09.880 understand it, to turn it into something meaningful, to then 0:09:09.920 --> 0:09:11.880 be able to help somebody else. You don't just live 0:09:12.000 --> 0:09:14.640 like this, go through trauma and then oh, sure, I'm fine, 0:09:14.640 --> 0:09:19.920 I'm unaffective. Build however, you change it with your sons. 0:09:20.080 --> 0:09:23.000 I tell them the skin is gorgeous, the darker it's beautiful. 0:09:23.559 --> 0:09:25.240 I want to make sure they hear it. And I 0:09:25.360 --> 0:09:28.080 realized it's important the language I have in my home. 0:09:28.679 --> 0:09:32.880 I no longer allow other family members, cousins, aunt's, uncle's, 0:09:33.280 --> 0:09:36.120 anyone to make comments to my kids and me to 0:09:36.200 --> 0:09:39.440 walk away. It's important for me now to be respectful 0:09:39.480 --> 0:09:41.559 of my family, especially those who are older, but to 0:09:41.679 --> 0:09:45.120 also say this is why that is hurtful. This is 0:09:45.160 --> 0:09:48.079 why it is damaging, and this is why I'm hoping 0:09:48.160 --> 0:09:50.280 we can talk about why you think that's okay to 0:09:50.360 --> 0:09:53.400 say and how you changing that could actually make us 0:09:53.400 --> 0:09:59.280 a stronger. Fact, because a stronger But they're comparing. There's 0:09:59.320 --> 0:10:01.599 something I say that people all the time. Comparison is 0:10:01.679 --> 0:10:03.480 the thief of joy. If you want to steal the 0:10:03.600 --> 0:10:06.200 joy from your family, whether it's their skin tone, whether 0:10:06.240 --> 0:10:08.400 it's their education, keep comparing your kids and see if 0:10:08.400 --> 0:10:10.360 you don't steal the joy and the love that's in 0:10:10.400 --> 0:10:12.600 your home. And let's try to be better. Let's try 0:10:12.760 --> 0:10:15.280 to really think about what we're saying to each other 0:10:15.360 --> 0:10:18.599 as human beings. I understand that your boyfriend Carlos is 0:10:18.679 --> 0:10:21.800 with you. Yes, we have him join us because it 0:10:21.880 --> 0:10:29.400 would be so relevant to this conversation. How god like 0:10:32.960 --> 0:10:40.640 beautiful couple it is. How did you guys meet on Instagram? Yeah? 0:10:42.360 --> 0:10:47.679 The d M very quickly set. He's a beautiful photographer 0:10:47.720 --> 0:10:49.559 and creative director. And so I saw his work and 0:10:49.600 --> 0:10:51.440 I was like, oh, I like this work. But then 0:10:51.480 --> 0:10:52.599 I saw his face and I was like, oh, I 0:10:52.679 --> 0:10:57.760 like updated black men, Latin men, white men. I was 0:10:57.840 --> 0:10:59.760 with a man who for three and a half years 0:10:59.840 --> 0:11:02.679 he s Puerto Rican and I not once try to 0:11:02.679 --> 0:11:06.360 speak Spanish, try to expose my culture, do anything, and 0:11:07.040 --> 0:11:09.439 with that person, I could not connect because I was 0:11:09.520 --> 0:11:12.400 too afraid. This is the first time I've ever felt 0:11:12.440 --> 0:11:17.679 comfortable and embracing my Latin side being with Carloso. Um 0:11:18.000 --> 0:11:21.199 and it's and I'm getting pretty good at it, thank you. 0:11:21.559 --> 0:11:24.839 And it's only be because Carlos and I practice, you know, 0:11:25.320 --> 0:11:29.840 practical tota and and like the only way, no fear, 0:11:29.920 --> 0:11:32.160 you're jumping. But the fear has went away because he 0:11:32.200 --> 0:11:52.160 doesn't judge me. Cuenta, I'll tell you what I think 0:11:52.400 --> 0:11:57.800 making the race better is understanding and not creating these 0:11:57.920 --> 0:12:00.240 barriers or even having to say they are afraid in 0:12:00.360 --> 0:12:11.000 Mexico contacto as Latinos. We need to make sure we're 0:12:11.000 --> 0:12:12.600 looking at Wow, that's the first time I ever said 0:12:12.600 --> 0:12:16.439 we yeah, there you go. That's crazy. That was really 0:12:16.600 --> 0:12:19.400 just that's great. And so we have to think about 0:12:19.440 --> 0:12:21.920 what internalized within the Latino community. Are we saying to 0:12:22.000 --> 0:12:26.199 ourselves and believing and then passing on that is wrong 0:12:26.480 --> 0:12:29.319 about Latinos or black people period? What do you guys? 0:12:32.559 --> 0:12:45.400 Information for Cuenta, we have to learn just we need 0:12:45.480 --> 0:12:48.480 to do better. We can't change what happened before. We 0:12:48.600 --> 0:12:54.160 can learn from it and try to move forward being open. 0:12:54.880 --> 0:12:58.719 Thank you, Thank you for being the Michael to The 0:12:58.720 --> 0:13:02.040 podcast network is dedicated to celebrating and elevating Latin X voices, 0:13:02.160 --> 0:13:06.480 stories and content creators in English, Spanish and Spanish. Michael 0:13:06.600 --> 0:13:11.240 Buddha to me means familia means lack or me that 0:13:11.480 --> 0:13:15.560 means labor means so many thig friendships, all the beautiful 0:13:15.720 --> 0:13:19.600 music dancing. It's our voice, our voice to be heard 0:13:19.600 --> 0:13:22.160 about so many different topics, not waiting for anyone else 0:13:22.240 --> 0:13:25.280 to tell our stories and to elevate Latin voices and 0:13:25.400 --> 0:13:28.840 think it's very important nowadays. It's the sense of pride 0:13:28.880 --> 0:13:31.560 that I get, feeling like I belong to something. Michael 0:13:32.040 --> 0:13:35.000 is an opportunity to bring our stories to center stage. 0:13:35.280 --> 0:13:37.280 Gonna be hot. I can't wait for you guys to 0:13:37.320 --> 0:13:40.680 listening Michael podcast that work on the I Heart Radio 0:13:40.679 --> 0:13:46.280 app or wherever you get your podcasts. Look at your 0:13:46.360 --> 0:13:49.520 children's eyes to see the true magic of a forest. 0:13:49.920 --> 0:13:53.000 It's a storybook world for them. You look and see 0:13:53.040 --> 0:13:56.000 a tree, They see the wrinkled face of a wizard 0:13:56.200 --> 0:13:59.840 with arms outstretched to the sky. They see treasure and pebble. 0:14:00.520 --> 0:14:03.199 They see a windy path that could lead to adventure, 0:14:03.600 --> 0:14:08.000 and they see you. They're fearless. Guide. Is this fascinating world? 0:14:08.400 --> 0:14:11.200 Find a forest near you and start exploring. I Discover 0:14:11.320 --> 0:14:13.560 the Forest dot org brought to you by the United 0:14:13.600 --> 0:14:17.319 States Forest Service and the AD Council. What grows in 0:14:17.360 --> 0:14:20.760 the forest trees? Sure you know what else grows in 0:14:20.800 --> 0:14:24.600 the forest. Our imagination, our sense of wonder, and our 0:14:24.680 --> 0:14:27.840 family bonds grow too, because when we disconnect from this 0:14:30.400 --> 0:14:35.000 and connect with this, we reconnect with each other. The 0:14:35.160 --> 0:14:38.160 forest is closer than you think. Find a forest near 0:14:38.200 --> 0:14:41.440 you and start exploring. I Discover the Forest dot org 0:14:41.800 --> 0:14:44.280 brought to you by the United States Forest Service and 0:14:44.400 --> 0:14:48.760 the AD Council. When was a child, she felt she 0:14:48.880 --> 0:14:51.840 was discriminated against because of the color of her skin 0:14:52.080 --> 0:14:54.600 and the texture of her hair. Now, as the star 0:14:54.720 --> 0:14:56.960 of love and hip hop Miami, which I also love, 0:14:57.280 --> 0:14:59.880 she's using her voice to speak up for black Latin 0:15:00.880 --> 0:15:12.040 welcome matter, I love you, Yeah, Sharing the love, Sharing 0:15:12.080 --> 0:15:17.200 the love. Born Diana dan Ellis de Losantos got her 0:15:17.280 --> 0:15:19.920 start in show business at four years old, dancing in 0:15:20.000 --> 0:15:24.600 the popular Spanish variety series Sabadogan were both she and 0:15:24.760 --> 0:15:28.480 Lily were regular cast members. People know me or I 0:15:28.600 --> 0:15:31.400 started off as Diana Losantos back when I used to 0:15:31.640 --> 0:15:34.960 you know, work at SI Francisco, which, by the way, 0:15:35.040 --> 0:15:36.880 now that I'm grown, I don't know how you did 0:15:36.960 --> 0:15:40.800 it because that was a lot that why why, why, 0:15:41.360 --> 0:15:43.600 I'll tell you, I'll tell you why. Being on that 0:15:43.760 --> 0:15:46.560 platform it was young, I learned a lot from it. 0:15:46.600 --> 0:15:50.320 I'm grateful for the opportunity. You know, we know that 0:15:50.480 --> 0:15:53.640 he wasn't a you know, the easiest cookie um at 0:15:53.720 --> 0:15:57.520 least not for me, and obviously you don't mean born 0:15:57.560 --> 0:16:01.160 that we grown now, and there were many things that 0:16:01.200 --> 0:16:03.800 he could have done with his platform to help people 0:16:03.880 --> 0:16:06.960 like myself. During choreographies, they never knew where to place 0:16:07.080 --> 0:16:12.320 me is gonna look awkward. He was one of those 0:16:12.400 --> 0:16:21.800 that also made a lot of those umusto Joe, because 0:16:22.240 --> 0:16:28.520 you know who's gonna go against the power racist comments 0:16:28.600 --> 0:16:33.280 with racist Forty years ago, we didn't have this car 0:16:33.480 --> 0:16:35.360 and the people have gotten away with it. Because even 0:16:35.400 --> 0:16:40.440 if you knew it and I love all these great things, yes, 0:16:40.520 --> 0:16:42.920 but if you had the opportunity of going to sleep 0:16:43.000 --> 0:16:45.240 and waking up black, would you want to wake up black? 0:16:45.600 --> 0:16:47.440 Would you want to be treated as a black person? 0:16:47.760 --> 0:16:49.960 And this is where I come in, where I'm like, okay, 0:16:50.680 --> 0:16:53.160 let's have real conversations. Okay, but you were the only 0:16:53.400 --> 0:16:59.360 black little girl and how many years remind me thirty 0:16:59.360 --> 0:17:03.800 five years ago? GETA is a great accomplishment. Come on, Londo, 0:17:03.880 --> 0:17:05.720 We've been here for the longest time. There isn't a 0:17:05.800 --> 0:17:10.000 Latin country that doesn't have black people, perto Rico, Cuba, 0:17:10.080 --> 0:17:11.840 every single place in the world. And that's the part 0:17:11.880 --> 0:17:30.920 that I feel that it is unfair. That's how I 0:17:31.760 --> 0:17:42.119 like belt like everybody was like drama and we just 0:17:42.160 --> 0:17:48.840 try to cover it up. But a lot of us 0:17:48.840 --> 0:17:51.040 are very hypocrite. And that's just the truth. You know 0:17:51.080 --> 0:17:55.159 what I'm saying, There is racism. Do you racista? I 0:17:55.320 --> 0:17:58.159 would never would you want your daughter, your son to 0:17:58.240 --> 0:18:02.359 marry a black person? You know, saying oh yeah, but 0:18:02.440 --> 0:18:05.760 she's right. Not most people are not like most most 0:18:05.840 --> 0:18:08.520 people have the subtext of racism. Whether they tell you 0:18:08.560 --> 0:18:10.800 to your face, I'm not racist, they're feeling it in 0:18:10.840 --> 0:18:12.639 there and and it's the truth. This is not the 0:18:12.680 --> 0:18:15.119 pain point anybody on this table. Specifically, it's for the 0:18:15.160 --> 0:18:19.040 people that are watching they and it's the truth. And 0:18:19.080 --> 0:18:22.200 if you're racist, don't pretend to like us and really 0:18:22.280 --> 0:18:29.399 not like us. Do what we leave the same thing 0:18:29.440 --> 0:18:31.640 with the notes. I've heard it all, and they make 0:18:31.720 --> 0:18:35.080 sure that you know that you are the darkest one. 0:18:35.160 --> 0:18:39.159 It's like, I see, yeah, I gotta tell me. And 0:18:41.160 --> 0:18:43.159 don't get it twisted with this wig that I got 0:18:43.240 --> 0:18:53.720 on right now, the badness, I got my curls. I 0:18:53.840 --> 0:18:56.080 embraced it. I played part of the game. I know 0:18:56.160 --> 0:18:59.560 what it is. I know that African American parents have 0:18:59.800 --> 0:19:04.320 the talk. Yes to Latino Afro Latino parents have that talk. 0:19:04.800 --> 0:19:10.200 Or after Latinos still black, Yes, we still have to 0:19:10.280 --> 0:19:14.359 have that conversation. No, but do the question, MoMA, listen 0:19:14.440 --> 0:19:17.840 to what you just told you. Afro Latinos black. You'll 0:19:18.000 --> 0:19:29.080 never if you walk by a street, you walk by 0:19:29.119 --> 0:19:32.200 a supermarket or whatever, there's always a security walking. Do 0:19:32.240 --> 0:19:34.440 you need anything, man, do you need anything? No? I don't. 0:19:34.480 --> 0:19:37.040 Why don't you ask somebody else? That's way to me. 0:19:37.119 --> 0:19:39.720 I'm so passionate about it, and I don't want to 0:19:39.760 --> 0:19:43.080 sugarcoat it. Being black. It's not being black in America, 0:19:43.119 --> 0:19:44.880 it's not being black in Cuba. It's not being black, 0:19:44.960 --> 0:19:48.679 and it's being black in the world. Just see us 0:19:48.720 --> 0:19:51.400 as people, you know, Just see us as people. Man, 0:19:51.920 --> 0:19:54.280 what you said is so important. Feel the fierce need 0:19:54.359 --> 0:19:58.000 if somebody says something inappropriate to be like that is disturbing, 0:19:58.480 --> 0:20:00.840 severely inappropriate and all. So I want to ask, is 0:20:00.880 --> 0:20:04.040 it okay if I say something? Is it okay if 0:20:04.080 --> 0:20:06.960 I insert myself here? Because I feel like I almost 0:20:07.280 --> 0:20:09.360 have to use my voice. But I also don't want 0:20:09.400 --> 0:20:12.239 to make anybody uncomfortable. Whatever you feel in your heart 0:20:12.280 --> 0:20:15.119 and your spirit, you do it, stand behind it, and 0:20:15.320 --> 0:20:17.200 especially if you know that it's coming from a good place. 0:20:17.480 --> 0:20:19.720 None of us will ever feel some type of way 0:20:19.720 --> 0:20:21.960 because you're defending us. Because you're standing up for us. 0:20:22.720 --> 0:20:25.879 We're grateful because no one doesn't. Growing up, you never 0:20:25.920 --> 0:20:28.600 saw people like us select those. To me was life 0:20:28.720 --> 0:20:31.480 and I had the honor of being able to work 0:20:31.520 --> 0:20:34.040 with her the way she went through a lot of 0:20:34.080 --> 0:20:37.240 discrimination in Cuba and even when she had the opportunity 0:20:37.320 --> 0:20:42.199 having a major role. I've gone to auditions, but novels 0:20:42.520 --> 0:20:50.359 and yes, exactly, we have like two They've told me. 0:20:51.160 --> 0:20:58.960 If we went so, then here comes apart where I'm 0:20:58.960 --> 0:21:06.680 more be Latina with all due respect, Jennifer Lopez COMI 0:21:06.960 --> 0:21:09.800 whatever it is, it doesn't look like me to agree 0:21:09.840 --> 0:21:13.840 with you. We have grown very much, really have we? 0:21:14.160 --> 0:21:17.240 How many black people do you see? How many black 0:21:17.280 --> 0:21:19.760 people do you see lablas? How many black people do 0:21:19.840 --> 0:21:21.520 you see in the covers of magazines? Do you see 0:21:21.560 --> 0:21:30.000 them in movies? No? You don't. So it's like, ma, 0:21:30.880 --> 0:21:35.720 have we really evolved? You for me and I started 0:21:35.760 --> 0:21:38.399 doing an emotional when I hear you're talking. Was super impactful. 0:21:38.600 --> 0:21:40.800 You don't understand how important it was for me to 0:21:40.880 --> 0:21:42.760 see you on love in hip hop. If I would 0:21:42.760 --> 0:21:45.760 have had you as a kid, Jesus, but I'm so 0:21:45.960 --> 0:21:48.879 thankful that I had you as a grown man. I 0:21:49.000 --> 0:21:50.960 know that there's not enough and there you still are 0:21:51.040 --> 0:21:53.960 tokenized in so many ways, But I have to tell you, 0:21:54.280 --> 0:21:57.280 even though you are that one and there should be more, 0:21:57.720 --> 0:21:59.760 I'm so thankful that you are the one than you 0:22:00.000 --> 0:22:03.000 of mine. Seriously, thank you. I have to give you 0:22:03.359 --> 0:22:05.680 all the credit in the world as well. I remember 0:22:05.800 --> 0:22:09.119 one of the most important moments in my career was 0:22:09.240 --> 0:22:13.359 performing with you on stage in The American Wife Lives 0:22:16.560 --> 0:22:18.480 Like you. Always make sure to give that credit to 0:22:18.560 --> 0:22:22.280 everyone because it takes a team to make those performances happen, 0:22:22.680 --> 0:22:25.800 and within that team there were people like us. And 0:22:25.880 --> 0:22:28.560 even though that I was very young, I shall always 0:22:29.119 --> 0:22:31.960 be great. Thank you. But you know what's funny, I 0:22:32.080 --> 0:22:37.480 thought it was us, I know, sharing our African traditions 0:22:37.560 --> 0:22:40.760 and are such a part of who we are, and 0:22:40.880 --> 0:22:46.480 to me, that's celebratory. You don't know. Because how impactful 0:22:46.560 --> 0:22:50.000 certain moments can be for people. Peopoth are gonna be 0:22:50.160 --> 0:22:53.359 amount of the role models for the next generation. What 0:22:53.440 --> 0:22:56.280 do you tell them? You go first, be patient with 0:22:56.359 --> 0:22:58.639 yourself and love every part of who you are. And 0:22:58.760 --> 0:23:00.520 it might take a little bit longer because of the 0:23:00.600 --> 0:23:03.080 negative things you've been hearing your entire life, But know 0:23:03.280 --> 0:23:05.359 that it's up to you to love yourself and to 0:23:05.440 --> 0:23:08.240 see the beauty even if your family, your culture, or 0:23:08.280 --> 0:23:10.399 the world around you does not make you feel like 0:23:10.560 --> 0:23:12.600 it is okay to love who you are and except 0:23:12.640 --> 0:23:14.800 who you are. I would say, I don't get the 0:23:14.840 --> 0:23:23.240 way I see and I would say more, I don't 0:23:23.280 --> 0:23:29.719 get the way I see anything me embrace your negativedude, 0:23:30.080 --> 0:23:33.960 embrace it, understand it, see it as a power. God 0:23:34.200 --> 0:23:37.760 blessed you with melanin melanin is a power. Understand that 0:23:37.880 --> 0:23:40.480 the world shall come against you, and you need to 0:23:40.560 --> 0:23:44.919 be prepared for whatever is to come. Don't let anyone 0:23:45.359 --> 0:23:49.000 anyone makes you feel that you're less than That's the 0:23:49.040 --> 0:23:51.919 most important thing, because when you have education, you have power. 0:23:53.400 --> 0:23:55.520 Make sure to check out Drink Chance, your number one 0:23:55.600 --> 0:23:58.840 music podcast on the Black Effect Podcast Network. Host and 0:23:58.920 --> 0:24:01.000 O r E and dj f N sat down with 0:24:01.160 --> 0:24:05.000 artists and icon Yea, which Vulture called one of most 0:24:05.040 --> 0:24:08.960 significant interviews. I literally had to go like Danos and 0:24:09.040 --> 0:24:10.680 I don't want to have to be the villain. But 0:24:10.800 --> 0:24:14.200 when I went and did the Donda thing, Yea returned 0:24:14.800 --> 0:24:17.800 and Abody had to sit back and watch the real leader. 0:24:18.119 --> 0:24:20.800 Check out Drink Champ's conversation with Yea and many more 0:24:20.920 --> 0:24:23.560 legendary artists each and every Friday on the I Heart 0:24:23.640 --> 0:24:26.359 Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen to your 0:24:26.400 --> 0:24:31.920 favorite shows. I'm Ev Rodsky, author of the New York 0:24:31.960 --> 0:24:35.840 Times bestseller Affair Play and Find Your Unicorn Space, activists 0:24:35.880 --> 0:24:39.080 on the gender division of labor, attorney and family mediator. 0:24:39.320 --> 0:24:42.679 And I'm Dr Addina Rucar, a Harvard physician and medical 0:24:42.760 --> 0:24:46.080 correspondent with an expertise and the science of stress, resilience, 0:24:46.200 --> 0:24:49.320 mental health, and burnout. We're so excited to share our 0:24:49.400 --> 0:24:52.920 podcast Time Out, a production of I Heeart Podcasts and 0:24:53.000 --> 0:24:56.480 Hell of Sunshine. We're uncovering why society makes it so 0:24:56.640 --> 0:24:58.920 hard for women to treat their time with the value 0:24:58.960 --> 0:25:02.520 it deserves. So take this time out with us. Listen 0:25:02.600 --> 0:25:05.320 to Time Out, a fair play podcast on the I 0:25:05.480 --> 0:25:09.760 Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. 0:25:11.640 --> 0:25:14.760 This is Roxande Gay, host of the Roxanne Gay Agenda. 0:25:14.960 --> 0:25:18.359