1 00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:07,000 Speaker 1: Manifestation is not magic. Manifestation is not wishing and waiting. 2 00:00:07,920 --> 00:00:11,440 Speaker 1: Manifestation is not writing it once in a journal and 3 00:00:11,480 --> 00:00:16,600 Speaker 1: closing the book. Manifestation is not saying affirmations while avoiding action. 4 00:00:17,680 --> 00:00:24,080 Speaker 1: Manifestation is not the universe delivering without your participation. Manifestation 5 00:00:24,320 --> 00:00:29,400 Speaker 1: is not a shortcut around hard work. It's clarity, belief, 6 00:00:29,920 --> 00:00:34,360 Speaker 1: and consistent action. In Alignment, the number one health and 7 00:00:34,400 --> 00:00:42,959 Speaker 1: wellness podcast, Jay Sety Jay Chatty, Hey everyone, welcome back 8 00:00:42,960 --> 00:00:45,919 Speaker 1: to On Purpose. I'm Jay Chatty, author of New York 9 00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:48,920 Speaker 1: Times bestsellers Think Like a Monk and Eight Rules of Love, 10 00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:51,159 Speaker 1: and today I want to talk to you about a 11 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:56,000 Speaker 1: topic that I feel we're all completely fascinated by, but 12 00:00:56,080 --> 00:01:01,640 Speaker 1: I think we really don't understand station. There is so 13 00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:05,200 Speaker 1: much about this word out there. There's so many interpretations, 14 00:01:05,240 --> 00:01:08,000 Speaker 1: there's so much about how to do it and what 15 00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:11,400 Speaker 1: it is, and I feel like often we set ourselves 16 00:01:11,440 --> 00:01:14,840 Speaker 1: up for failure by subscribing to a word that we 17 00:01:14,880 --> 00:01:18,560 Speaker 1: don't fully understand, by subscribing to an idea that sounds good, 18 00:01:18,560 --> 00:01:21,520 Speaker 1: it makes us feel good, but it doesn't really transfer 19 00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:24,760 Speaker 1: into reality. How many of you have ever tried to 20 00:01:24,880 --> 00:01:28,000 Speaker 1: manifest a vision board and not seen it come to life. 21 00:01:28,319 --> 00:01:30,720 Speaker 1: How many of you have tried to repeat something constantly 22 00:01:30,720 --> 00:01:33,840 Speaker 1: in affirmations and not seen it come to life. How 23 00:01:33,880 --> 00:01:37,120 Speaker 1: many of you have tried to manifest something big and 24 00:01:37,200 --> 00:01:40,160 Speaker 1: beautiful in your life and actually felt like you went 25 00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:42,920 Speaker 1: down the wrong path. If that applies to any of you, 26 00:01:43,080 --> 00:01:45,800 Speaker 1: this episode is for you, because I'm going to talk 27 00:01:45,800 --> 00:01:50,600 Speaker 1: about the myths of manifestation and how to actually build 28 00:01:50,600 --> 00:01:55,560 Speaker 1: the life that you truly want. Myth number one, manifestation 29 00:01:56,080 --> 00:01:59,840 Speaker 1: is magic. We think if I think about it hard, 30 00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:05,480 Speaker 1: it will appear. Here's the reality. Your brain isn't a genie, 31 00:02:05,920 --> 00:02:09,359 Speaker 1: it's a GPS. If you don't type in the address, 32 00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:12,800 Speaker 1: it can't take you anywhere. Do you ever get in 33 00:02:12,840 --> 00:02:16,440 Speaker 1: the car and just start driving without a destination. You'd 34 00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:21,000 Speaker 1: waste gas, You'd waste time and energy. That's what wishing 35 00:02:21,280 --> 00:02:26,200 Speaker 1: without clarity does to your life. Research from Locke and 36 00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:29,840 Speaker 1: Latham's goal setting theory of two thousand and two show 37 00:02:29,960 --> 00:02:36,760 Speaker 1: specific goals lead to higher motivation and success than vague intentions. 38 00:02:37,320 --> 00:02:39,480 Speaker 1: So here's what I want you to do. I want 39 00:02:39,480 --> 00:02:43,000 Speaker 1: you to swap I want to be successful for I 40 00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:47,360 Speaker 1: want to grow my business revenue by twenty percent this year. 41 00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:53,200 Speaker 1: Vague wishes drift, clear goals direct. So anyone who's saying 42 00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:56,639 Speaker 1: manifestation is just I want abundance, I want to be free, 43 00:02:57,160 --> 00:03:00,959 Speaker 1: I want to create greatness. These are beautiful inspirations, there's 44 00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:05,639 Speaker 1: nothing wrong with them, but without clarity, we don't know 45 00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:09,480 Speaker 1: what action to take. Your goal has to be clear, 46 00:03:10,280 --> 00:03:13,240 Speaker 1: Your vision of what you're building has to be clear. Now, 47 00:03:13,320 --> 00:03:15,120 Speaker 1: I'm not saying that it's going to work out just 48 00:03:15,160 --> 00:03:17,359 Speaker 1: as you think it is. I'm not even saying you're 49 00:03:17,360 --> 00:03:21,120 Speaker 1: going to get exactly what you envision. But the truth 50 00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:27,200 Speaker 1: is to start any journey, you need clarity. Manifestation is 51 00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:34,120 Speaker 1: not magic. Manifestation is not wishing and waiting. Manifestation is 52 00:03:34,160 --> 00:03:37,480 Speaker 1: not writing it once in a journal and closing the book. 53 00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:43,880 Speaker 1: Manifestation is not saying affirmations while avoiding action. Manifestation is 54 00:03:43,920 --> 00:03:49,680 Speaker 1: not the universe delivering without your participation. Manifestation is not 55 00:03:49,760 --> 00:03:55,560 Speaker 1: a shortcut around hard work. Manifestation is not about getting 56 00:03:55,680 --> 00:04:03,400 Speaker 1: everything you want instantly. Manifestation isn't magic. It's clarity, belief, 57 00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:09,480 Speaker 1: and consistent action in alignment. For so many people, they 58 00:04:09,480 --> 00:04:12,440 Speaker 1: may tell an amazing story about how they manifested something. 59 00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:15,920 Speaker 1: It's not that they didn't vision it. It's not that 60 00:04:15,960 --> 00:04:20,640 Speaker 1: they didn't have clarity. They also aligned their action, their time, 61 00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:27,400 Speaker 1: their energy, their resources in that direction. Manifestation truly is 62 00:04:27,440 --> 00:04:31,760 Speaker 1: the alignment of what you think, what you say, and 63 00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:36,360 Speaker 1: what you do. When those three things are aligned, that's 64 00:04:36,440 --> 00:04:39,240 Speaker 1: what creates impact in the world and in your life. 65 00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:41,800 Speaker 1: Whereas when you think in your head, I want abundance, 66 00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:46,520 Speaker 1: you say it out loud, but your actions are completely 67 00:04:46,560 --> 00:04:51,360 Speaker 1: the opposite. Nothing changes. The problem is we think manifestation 68 00:04:51,480 --> 00:04:54,159 Speaker 1: means if I think abundantly, then I'll be abundant in 69 00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:57,320 Speaker 1: my business. No, you might actually have a beautiful habit 70 00:04:57,360 --> 00:05:00,919 Speaker 1: for happiness, But the strategy for sex is watching the 71 00:05:00,960 --> 00:05:05,080 Speaker 1: patterns of success. It's analyzing the journeys of success. It's 72 00:05:05,080 --> 00:05:09,440 Speaker 1: being locked into a different mind. Myth number two is 73 00:05:09,480 --> 00:05:15,200 Speaker 1: that positive thoughts alone attract success. People think if I 74 00:05:15,240 --> 00:05:21,120 Speaker 1: stay positive, the universe will deliver. This sets us up 75 00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:25,120 Speaker 1: for a lot of disappointment because I know so many people, 76 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:30,320 Speaker 1: good people who think positively, but then difficult things happen 77 00:05:30,360 --> 00:05:33,520 Speaker 1: in their life. Hard things happen in their life. The 78 00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:37,640 Speaker 1: reality is positivity is fuel, but it's not the vehicle. 79 00:05:38,400 --> 00:05:42,760 Speaker 1: It gets you moving, but you still have to drive. 80 00:05:43,040 --> 00:05:46,960 Speaker 1: Imagine this. Think of going to the gym telling yourself, 81 00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:51,000 Speaker 1: I believe in myself. That won't build muscle unless you 82 00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:53,360 Speaker 1: pick up the weights. But it's great that it made 83 00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:57,760 Speaker 1: you show up, So it's important. It's just incomplete. Barbara 84 00:05:57,920 --> 00:06:04,120 Speaker 1: Fredrickson's Broaden and Build the shows positivity expands our creativity 85 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:09,159 Speaker 1: and problem solving, but without action, it just fades. Here's 86 00:06:09,200 --> 00:06:14,960 Speaker 1: your step. Pair every affirmation with one action. If you 87 00:06:15,040 --> 00:06:18,200 Speaker 1: say I'm building wealth, then at the same time, set 88 00:06:18,279 --> 00:06:21,719 Speaker 1: up an automatic transfer to savings as soon as you 89 00:06:21,720 --> 00:06:25,839 Speaker 1: get your paycheck. The moment you take action, your life 90 00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:32,040 Speaker 1: will change. The moment you take action, clarity replaces confusion 91 00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:37,080 Speaker 1: the moment you take action, momentum begins. The moment you 92 00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:42,440 Speaker 1: take action, the right time finally arrives. The moment you 93 00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:48,040 Speaker 1: take action, you stop waiting for permission. Notice how affirmation 94 00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:52,800 Speaker 1: and action together creates alignment. Affirmation on its own is 95 00:06:52,839 --> 00:06:57,400 Speaker 1: wishful thinking. Action on its own doesn't feel like it's 96 00:06:57,560 --> 00:07:01,560 Speaker 1: fueled with a higher way of living. Affirmation and action 97 00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:07,160 Speaker 1: together are an unbeatable formula. And so I want you 98 00:07:07,279 --> 00:07:09,280 Speaker 1: to really think about in your life about the things 99 00:07:09,279 --> 00:07:11,520 Speaker 1: you've been struggling with, the things you're always trying to 100 00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:14,440 Speaker 1: pump yourself up about, and ask yourself, what habits have 101 00:07:14,520 --> 00:07:16,960 Speaker 1: I not built? What actions have I not built? What 102 00:07:17,080 --> 00:07:20,400 Speaker 1: systems have I not built? We're not failed by our 103 00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:24,840 Speaker 1: desires or our expectations. We're failed by the systems we 104 00:07:24,880 --> 00:07:28,720 Speaker 1: don't build. We're failed by the processes we don't create. 105 00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:33,160 Speaker 1: We're failed by the criteria we don't have. We're failed 106 00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:37,000 Speaker 1: by the boundaries we don't make. That's what fails us. 107 00:07:37,480 --> 00:07:42,000 Speaker 1: Myth number three, Writing it down is not enough. We 108 00:07:42,040 --> 00:07:44,760 Speaker 1: think I wrote in my journal, so it's on its way. 109 00:07:45,400 --> 00:07:49,400 Speaker 1: Here's the reality. Writing helps focus the brain, but it's 110 00:07:49,440 --> 00:07:52,800 Speaker 1: step one, not the finish line. Think of it like 111 00:07:52,880 --> 00:07:55,520 Speaker 1: making a grocery list. Everyone needs one of those. You 112 00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:57,400 Speaker 1: need to know what you're missing, what you need to 113 00:07:57,400 --> 00:08:00,200 Speaker 1: fill your fridge with what you need this week. But 114 00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:03,040 Speaker 1: if you never go to the store, the list doesn't 115 00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:07,520 Speaker 1: feed you. Research known as the generation effect shows writing 116 00:08:07,600 --> 00:08:13,680 Speaker 1: improves memory and focus, but memory isn't momentum. Here's the 117 00:08:13,720 --> 00:08:18,800 Speaker 1: step after journaling, ad what's one step I can take 118 00:08:18,880 --> 00:08:24,160 Speaker 1: today toward this? If you write, start a podcast, your 119 00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:28,400 Speaker 1: next step could be outline an episode, learn how to 120 00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:32,559 Speaker 1: record a podcast, research a podcast. For so many of us, 121 00:08:32,559 --> 00:08:35,679 Speaker 1: we write down what we want. We don't write down 122 00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:38,440 Speaker 1: how we're going to get there. It's the how we're 123 00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:41,320 Speaker 1: going to get there that makes things seem manageable. What 124 00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:43,439 Speaker 1: our mind does is when we say I want to 125 00:08:43,440 --> 00:08:47,240 Speaker 1: start a podcast that feels so big, we feel overwhelmed. 126 00:08:47,720 --> 00:08:52,080 Speaker 1: We feel overburdened by doing this huge thing. When you 127 00:08:52,120 --> 00:08:54,640 Speaker 1: break it down into all the multiple steps of how 128 00:08:54,679 --> 00:08:57,960 Speaker 1: to get there, the key is to figure out the 129 00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:00,920 Speaker 1: next step you can take right now. The next step 130 00:09:00,960 --> 00:09:02,559 Speaker 1: you can take right now, which is calling up a 131 00:09:02,559 --> 00:09:05,679 Speaker 1: friend who has a podcast, watching podcasts to find out 132 00:09:05,720 --> 00:09:08,920 Speaker 1: a format that works for you, looking up a YouTube 133 00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:11,600 Speaker 1: video from a creator telling you how to start one. 134 00:09:12,320 --> 00:09:15,160 Speaker 1: Without those steps, you can think about starting a podcast 135 00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:19,680 Speaker 1: for months and years, and nothing will ever happen. Manifestation 136 00:09:20,320 --> 00:09:24,240 Speaker 1: is clarity about what you want and what it takes. 137 00:09:25,040 --> 00:09:29,640 Speaker 1: Manifestation is writing it down and then building it step 138 00:09:29,679 --> 00:09:36,360 Speaker 1: by step. Manifestation is persistence when motivation fades. Manifestation is 139 00:09:36,360 --> 00:09:40,679 Speaker 1: aligning your choices with your values, not just your wishes. 140 00:09:41,320 --> 00:09:43,880 Speaker 1: If you just make it about your wishes, if you 141 00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:46,480 Speaker 1: just make it about what you're writing. If you don't 142 00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:49,679 Speaker 1: ever make it about the how, right people say, start 143 00:09:49,679 --> 00:09:52,640 Speaker 1: with why really important. You should know why you're doing 144 00:09:52,720 --> 00:09:55,320 Speaker 1: what you're doing. You should know what you want to build. 145 00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:57,680 Speaker 1: But if you don't know how you're going to get there, 146 00:09:58,559 --> 00:10:01,440 Speaker 1: it's almost the hardest thing. If you don't know how 147 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:03,680 Speaker 1: you're going to get to the party on a Saturday night, 148 00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:06,280 Speaker 1: if you don't know how you're going to get to 149 00:10:06,360 --> 00:10:09,320 Speaker 1: your vacation destination, if you don't know how you're going 150 00:10:09,360 --> 00:10:13,119 Speaker 1: to build that company, it becomes a lot harder. Spend 151 00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:17,560 Speaker 1: more time figuring out the how, and you'll know that 152 00:10:17,640 --> 00:10:20,560 Speaker 1: you're making momentum. You'll know you're making progress, you'll know 153 00:10:20,679 --> 00:10:23,319 Speaker 1: you're moving in the right direction. So the thing is, 154 00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:25,840 Speaker 1: I really want you to get there. I really want 155 00:10:25,880 --> 00:10:28,640 Speaker 1: you to experience the joy of building something you love. 156 00:10:29,480 --> 00:10:31,160 Speaker 1: I don't just want it to remain a dream in 157 00:10:31,200 --> 00:10:35,120 Speaker 1: your mind and your heart space that never gets to 158 00:10:35,120 --> 00:10:38,880 Speaker 1: see the light of day. Myth number four, The universe 159 00:10:38,960 --> 00:10:44,200 Speaker 1: rewards wanting. If I want it badly enough, I'll get it. 160 00:10:44,200 --> 00:10:48,560 Speaker 1: It does not work that way. Desire its fuel, But 161 00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:53,160 Speaker 1: direction is the map. Without it, you spin in circles 162 00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:57,480 Speaker 1: have you ever desperately wanted a job, relationship, or whatever 163 00:10:57,520 --> 00:11:01,440 Speaker 1: it may be, but you had no strategy. Desire without 164 00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:05,960 Speaker 1: direction is like stepping on the gas with no steering wheel. 165 00:11:06,320 --> 00:11:11,080 Speaker 1: The reticular activating system, also known as RAS, filters what 166 00:11:11,240 --> 00:11:15,240 Speaker 1: you notice, define a goal, and your brain literally starts 167 00:11:15,280 --> 00:11:19,200 Speaker 1: spotting opportunities. For example, once you think of buying a 168 00:11:19,240 --> 00:11:23,120 Speaker 1: red car, you see them everywhere. So here's the step. 169 00:11:23,640 --> 00:11:27,200 Speaker 1: Each morning, write down three things you want to notice 170 00:11:27,440 --> 00:11:33,240 Speaker 1: that day, maybe new clients, learning opportunities, or ways to connect. 171 00:11:33,840 --> 00:11:39,400 Speaker 1: Your RAS will tune in. This is so important if 172 00:11:39,440 --> 00:11:42,280 Speaker 1: you have a goal to write a book, start a podcast, 173 00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:45,559 Speaker 1: build a company, ask yourself what is it that you need. 174 00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:47,720 Speaker 1: I was talking to a friend the other day and 175 00:11:47,760 --> 00:11:49,600 Speaker 1: I'd said to him how important it was for him 176 00:11:49,640 --> 00:11:52,240 Speaker 1: to show up to networking events. I said, if you're 177 00:11:52,280 --> 00:11:54,000 Speaker 1: out of those events, you're going to meet people. People 178 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:56,040 Speaker 1: are gonna see you, You're gonna get to connect with them. 179 00:11:56,440 --> 00:11:58,520 Speaker 1: He was avoiding it for months and months and months. 180 00:11:59,040 --> 00:12:02,840 Speaker 1: He finally went to one, and he was shocked at 181 00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:05,920 Speaker 1: what it felt like to be front of mind. When 182 00:12:05,920 --> 00:12:08,760 Speaker 1: you're present, you get to have the conversations you would 183 00:12:08,800 --> 00:12:11,800 Speaker 1: never get to if you weren't there. So many of 184 00:12:11,840 --> 00:12:15,000 Speaker 1: us avoid the actual action, even though in our mind 185 00:12:15,040 --> 00:12:18,160 Speaker 1: we're wondering, why is this business not taking off? Why 186 00:12:18,240 --> 00:12:21,680 Speaker 1: is it not starting off? Because we're not positioning ourselves 187 00:12:21,720 --> 00:12:25,000 Speaker 1: in the places that we need to be. Remember, you 188 00:12:25,040 --> 00:12:28,280 Speaker 1: don't see things as they are. You see them through 189 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:32,280 Speaker 1: your own fears and hopes. You don't see yourself as 190 00:12:32,280 --> 00:12:36,880 Speaker 1: you are. You see the story you keep repeating about 191 00:12:36,920 --> 00:12:40,000 Speaker 1: who you are. You don't see the future as it is. 192 00:12:40,720 --> 00:12:44,520 Speaker 1: You see the version you believe is possible. So many 193 00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:46,360 Speaker 1: of us have the wish, we have the one, we 194 00:12:46,480 --> 00:12:50,080 Speaker 1: have the desire. We don't have the direction. We don't 195 00:12:50,080 --> 00:12:54,000 Speaker 1: have the drive. And where does that drive come from? 196 00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:56,760 Speaker 1: Comes from picking something that you really value. I mean, 197 00:12:56,800 --> 00:13:01,080 Speaker 1: everyone would want to be financially free, everyone would want abundance. 198 00:13:01,200 --> 00:13:03,680 Speaker 1: Those are things we all want. What does that look 199 00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:07,319 Speaker 1: like for you? How does that manifest for you? When 200 00:13:07,360 --> 00:13:09,640 Speaker 1: I say that, what I mean is how do you 201 00:13:09,720 --> 00:13:12,360 Speaker 1: envision that? How's it unique to you? And how are 202 00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:31,360 Speaker 1: you going to get there that's unique to you? Myth 203 00:13:31,480 --> 00:13:35,839 Speaker 1: number five, The path will be smooth if it's meant 204 00:13:35,880 --> 00:13:40,120 Speaker 1: to be. We think, if I face obstacle, maybe it's 205 00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:44,839 Speaker 1: not my destiny. The reality is, struggle doesn't mean you're 206 00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:48,520 Speaker 1: on the wrong path. It usually means you're on a 207 00:13:48,640 --> 00:13:52,600 Speaker 1: real one right. Struggle doesn't mean you're making a mistake. 208 00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:56,439 Speaker 1: Struggle could mean that you have a lot to learn 209 00:13:56,559 --> 00:13:58,880 Speaker 1: to get to this goal. If you have something you 210 00:13:58,960 --> 00:14:01,920 Speaker 1: really value, don't change what you value, change the path 211 00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:05,640 Speaker 1: to get there. Ask any athlete, artist, or entrepreneur. I've 212 00:14:05,679 --> 00:14:09,560 Speaker 1: interviewed so many of them on the podcast. The dream 213 00:14:09,720 --> 00:14:13,400 Speaker 1: always comes with resistance. You'll get to where you want 214 00:14:13,400 --> 00:14:16,360 Speaker 1: in life, just not in the way you imagined it. 215 00:14:17,320 --> 00:14:23,000 Speaker 1: Pain isn't proof of misalignment. It's proof you're growing. It's 216 00:14:23,040 --> 00:14:26,120 Speaker 1: proof it matters, and ultimately it reveals to you whether 217 00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:28,880 Speaker 1: it matters enough. If you give up because something's hard, 218 00:14:29,680 --> 00:14:32,040 Speaker 1: it means you didn't care enough about the thing. We 219 00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:34,600 Speaker 1: do the most difficult things as humans for things we 220 00:14:34,680 --> 00:14:37,960 Speaker 1: care about. Parenting is one of the most thankless jobs. 221 00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:40,600 Speaker 1: It's one of the hardest jobs, but people do it 222 00:14:40,640 --> 00:14:45,040 Speaker 1: because they love their child. Their love outweighs the pain. 223 00:14:45,640 --> 00:14:49,320 Speaker 1: That's what purposes, That's what manifesting really is. Is where 224 00:14:49,320 --> 00:14:53,000 Speaker 1: your love for something, your dedication, your devotion to something 225 00:14:53,840 --> 00:14:58,840 Speaker 1: is more than your pain, stress, and difficulty that you 226 00:14:58,920 --> 00:15:03,240 Speaker 1: go through to get there. Angela Duckworth's grit research shows 227 00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:09,400 Speaker 1: sustained effort through challenges predicts achievement more than talent. Here's 228 00:15:09,440 --> 00:15:14,040 Speaker 1: a step. When you hit resistance, reframe it. This is 229 00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:18,400 Speaker 1: the workout, not the wall. Write down what this obstacle 230 00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:22,360 Speaker 1: is teaching you. Just because something is right for you 231 00:15:23,280 --> 00:15:27,240 Speaker 1: doesn't mean it will be easy. Just because something is 232 00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:32,040 Speaker 1: meant for you doesn't mean it will come quickly. Just 233 00:15:32,080 --> 00:15:36,640 Speaker 1: because it's your purpose doesn't mean it won't test your patience. 234 00:15:37,640 --> 00:15:41,360 Speaker 1: Just because you found your calling doesn't mean you won't 235 00:15:41,400 --> 00:15:45,280 Speaker 1: doubt yourself along the way. And just because you're ready 236 00:15:46,120 --> 00:15:50,360 Speaker 1: doesn't mean life won't make you wait. If number six 237 00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:54,800 Speaker 1: manifesting is passive, I just have to wait and trust. 238 00:15:55,920 --> 00:15:57,840 Speaker 1: I was at an event the other day and someone 239 00:15:57,880 --> 00:16:00,880 Speaker 1: asked me about how do you surrender? How do you 240 00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:04,120 Speaker 1: create detachment? How do you do something but then leave 241 00:16:04,160 --> 00:16:07,120 Speaker 1: the result up to what's going on? And here's what 242 00:16:07,160 --> 00:16:11,960 Speaker 1: I said. I said, surrender only starts when you've already 243 00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:16,720 Speaker 1: done everything under your control, if you have given one 244 00:16:16,760 --> 00:16:20,360 Speaker 1: hundred percent of your energy, if you have left no 245 00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:24,960 Speaker 1: stone unturned, and if you have given it all you've got. 246 00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:27,800 Speaker 1: That's when surrender starts. Sometimes we only do fifty percent 247 00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:30,320 Speaker 1: of that, and then we're thinking, there's fifty percent of surrender. 248 00:16:30,360 --> 00:16:34,560 Speaker 1: That's not surrender, that's just hoping, wishing, and waiting. Surrender 249 00:16:34,680 --> 00:16:39,320 Speaker 1: says I've done everything I possibly could. I've put in 250 00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:42,200 Speaker 1: all the energy, knowledge and wisdom I have. At this 251 00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:46,240 Speaker 1: point in my life, I'm now detached from the result 252 00:16:47,040 --> 00:16:50,920 Speaker 1: because I realized whatever comes is what's truly meant for me, 253 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:56,080 Speaker 1: and I have no idea of what I'm being prepared for. 254 00:16:56,920 --> 00:17:00,800 Speaker 1: I'll give you an example. Eight years ago, when one 255 00:17:00,800 --> 00:17:04,679 Speaker 1: of my videos went crazy viral on social media, a 256 00:17:04,680 --> 00:17:06,720 Speaker 1: TV company in LA reached out to me and said 257 00:17:06,760 --> 00:17:09,359 Speaker 1: they wanted to make a TV show. I had no 258 00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:12,439 Speaker 1: idea what that meant. So I spoke to a friend 259 00:17:12,720 --> 00:17:15,199 Speaker 1: who I thought made a TV show, someone who I 260 00:17:15,240 --> 00:17:18,000 Speaker 1: was producing with. We created a sizzle rule, we made 261 00:17:18,040 --> 00:17:20,560 Speaker 1: a deck, We flew out to La on our own money. 262 00:17:20,560 --> 00:17:22,200 Speaker 1: I used to live in New York at that time. 263 00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:25,600 Speaker 1: I went and built this and went back and forth. 264 00:17:25,840 --> 00:17:28,320 Speaker 1: We went around and pitched it to every major's TV 265 00:17:28,440 --> 00:17:31,800 Speaker 1: network and streamer at the time. Everyone rejected it. No 266 00:17:31,840 --> 00:17:35,560 Speaker 1: one wanted it. Now I had done everything I possibly could. 267 00:17:35,760 --> 00:17:39,560 Speaker 1: Was I upset? Yes? Was I disappointed, of course, But 268 00:17:39,640 --> 00:17:42,679 Speaker 1: I'd done everything I possibly could to make that the 269 00:17:42,720 --> 00:17:46,520 Speaker 1: best pitch I could have. I was detached. I was surrendered. 270 00:17:47,840 --> 00:17:50,960 Speaker 1: It's only because I got rejected that I started on purpose, 271 00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:54,560 Speaker 1: something that was built by me, something that I started 272 00:17:54,600 --> 00:17:57,320 Speaker 1: from scratch, something that I get to define who I 273 00:17:57,359 --> 00:17:59,480 Speaker 1: speak to when I speak to them, what we talk about, 274 00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:03,119 Speaker 1: where we go. So I would never have this if 275 00:18:03,160 --> 00:18:05,040 Speaker 1: I got given a TV show that could have lasted 276 00:18:05,080 --> 00:18:07,640 Speaker 1: two to three seasons and got canceled, I will never 277 00:18:07,680 --> 00:18:13,920 Speaker 1: have this opportunity. Surrender begins when endeavor is complete. If 278 00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:19,479 Speaker 1: your endeavor is incomplete, there's no surrender. It's just wishing, hoping, 279 00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:24,000 Speaker 1: and wanting. Put in all the energy that you possibly have, 280 00:18:24,760 --> 00:18:28,240 Speaker 1: all the wisdom and knowledge you possibly have, and then 281 00:18:28,320 --> 00:18:32,399 Speaker 1: surrender to the fact that what you receive may save 282 00:18:32,520 --> 00:18:36,680 Speaker 1: you for what's to come. I was given something better 283 00:18:36,720 --> 00:18:39,960 Speaker 1: than I imagined in on purpose, than I could have 284 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:44,720 Speaker 1: ever imagined from any show I could have created. Waiting 285 00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:51,760 Speaker 1: isn't manifesting, it's stalling. Action is what flips vision into reality. 286 00:18:52,440 --> 00:18:56,280 Speaker 1: Imagine planting seeds and then sitting indoors hoping they grow 287 00:18:56,560 --> 00:19:00,439 Speaker 1: without watering, sunlight, or care. That's what waiting does to 288 00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:06,200 Speaker 1: your dreams. Research by Bandura's self efficacy theory shows confidence 289 00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:11,240 Speaker 1: comes from doing small things successfully, not from waiting for 290 00:19:11,280 --> 00:19:15,280 Speaker 1: a big break. Here's a step. Break one big dream 291 00:19:15,800 --> 00:19:19,080 Speaker 1: into a seven day goal. You want to change careers, 292 00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:24,960 Speaker 1: update your resume this week. Momentum builds confidence. Myth number seven, 293 00:19:25,560 --> 00:19:30,200 Speaker 1: manifestation is about stuff. We think if I manifested money, 294 00:19:30,240 --> 00:19:34,040 Speaker 1: a car, a house, I'll be happy. And here's the reality. 295 00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:39,119 Speaker 1: Stuff is a byproduct of meaning and value that you create. 296 00:19:39,440 --> 00:19:42,120 Speaker 1: It's not bad, it's great to have, it's wonderful to have, 297 00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:45,280 Speaker 1: but it can't be the goal in and of itself. 298 00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:48,080 Speaker 1: Here's the context. How many times have you gotten what 299 00:19:48,160 --> 00:19:51,639 Speaker 1: you wanted, the promotion, the gadget, the trip, and still 300 00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:55,440 Speaker 1: felt empty after a week. That's because fulfillment is about 301 00:19:55,480 --> 00:20:00,280 Speaker 1: alignment with values, not just getting the thing I SAIDs 302 00:20:00,280 --> 00:20:03,240 Speaker 1: From the Harvard Study of Adult Development. This is the 303 00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:08,480 Speaker 1: Grant study that lasted over eighty five years shows quality relationships, 304 00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:12,080 Speaker 1: not wealth or fame, are the strongest predictors of long 305 00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:14,480 Speaker 1: term happiness. Now I'm not saying and I always want 306 00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:17,680 Speaker 1: to clarify this. Wealth is important. Success is important. That's 307 00:20:17,680 --> 00:20:20,320 Speaker 1: why we have so many amazing money experts on on 308 00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:23,320 Speaker 1: Purpose to help you figure that out. When you write 309 00:20:23,320 --> 00:20:27,000 Speaker 1: a goal, add your why. So don't just write I 310 00:20:27,040 --> 00:20:30,760 Speaker 1: want one hundred thousand dollars salary or whatever it may be. Right, 311 00:20:31,640 --> 00:20:33,680 Speaker 1: I want one hundred thousand dollars salary so I can 312 00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:37,159 Speaker 1: have freedom to travel, take care of my parents, and 313 00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:40,919 Speaker 1: live without stress. When you make the end goal about 314 00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:44,800 Speaker 1: a thing or stuff, it ends up letting you down 315 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:48,159 Speaker 1: versus when that is just a byproduct of creating value 316 00:20:48,160 --> 00:20:53,280 Speaker 1: in success. If you analyze patterns, you'll become successful. If 317 00:20:53,320 --> 00:20:56,240 Speaker 1: you learn how to market your product, you'll become successful. 318 00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:59,560 Speaker 1: If you learn how to solve someone's problem, you'll become successful. 319 00:20:59,560 --> 00:21:02,800 Speaker 1: If you do all those things, the car, the house, 320 00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:06,040 Speaker 1: the travel, that will all come from that. So that's 321 00:21:06,040 --> 00:21:08,320 Speaker 1: what you want to put your energy into, not the 322 00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:10,840 Speaker 1: vision of what that thing is that you want. That 323 00:21:10,880 --> 00:21:13,119 Speaker 1: doesn't drive. That doesn't make you a better salesperson, It 324 00:21:13,119 --> 00:21:15,280 Speaker 1: doesn't make you a better marketer. It doesn't make you 325 00:21:15,320 --> 00:21:18,320 Speaker 1: a better coder. It doesn't make you a better user 326 00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:21,080 Speaker 1: of AI. It doesn't make you a better videographer photographer, 327 00:21:21,160 --> 00:21:22,639 Speaker 1: but looking at a picture of the car or the 328 00:21:22,640 --> 00:21:25,320 Speaker 1: house you want every day. That will come by becoming 329 00:21:25,600 --> 00:21:28,800 Speaker 1: better at your art, better at your skill. That's what 330 00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:32,760 Speaker 1: you want to focus on. Don't overvalue the goal and 331 00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:40,439 Speaker 1: undervalue the growth. Don't overvalue speed and undervalue direction. Don't 332 00:21:40,520 --> 00:21:49,440 Speaker 1: overvalue success and undervalue sanity. Don't overvalue approval and undervalue authenticity. 333 00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:56,920 Speaker 1: Don't overvalue being right and undervalue being kind. Don't overvalue 334 00:21:56,960 --> 00:22:02,840 Speaker 1: recognition and undervalue can and see. Don't overvalue the outcome 335 00:22:03,640 --> 00:22:09,159 Speaker 1: and undervalue the process. Don't overvalue what you gain and 336 00:22:09,320 --> 00:22:13,199 Speaker 1: undervalue who you become. It's not about wanting for the 337 00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:17,120 Speaker 1: universe to deliver. It's about getting clear, rewiring your brain 338 00:22:17,160 --> 00:22:21,639 Speaker 1: to see opportunities, and taking consistent steps until your vision 339 00:22:21,960 --> 00:22:24,960 Speaker 1: becomes a reality. Thank you so much for listening to me. 340 00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:27,680 Speaker 1: I hope you enjoyed this episode. Pass it on to 341 00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:29,639 Speaker 1: a friend, Tag me on social media and let me 342 00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:32,600 Speaker 1: know what resonated with you, and I'll see you on 343 00:22:32,640 --> 00:22:35,760 Speaker 1: the next episode. Remember I'm forever in your corner and 344 00:22:35,800 --> 00:22:38,639 Speaker 1: I'm always rooting for you. If you love this podcast, 345 00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:42,520 Speaker 1: you love my episode with Lewis Hamilton Lewis and I 346 00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:46,960 Speaker 1: talk about why you should stop chasing society's definition of 347 00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:50,840 Speaker 1: success and how to be more intentional with your goals. 348 00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:52,920 Speaker 1: You don't want to miss it like it's not about 349 00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:55,280 Speaker 1: being perfect. It's about just every day, one step at 350 00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:57,120 Speaker 1: the time, trying to be better, trying to do more. 351 00:22:57,200 --> 00:22:59,480 Speaker 1: I'm learning a lot about myself. I have to break 352 00:22:59,520 --> 00:23:02,160 Speaker 1: myself down in order to be out to be better.