WEBVTT - Capítulo 232: Crash Out or Crisis? 

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<v Speaker 1>Look like God alreadyo.

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<v Speaker 2>O lao la look more is I'm Viosa.

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<v Speaker 1>And I'm Mala And I have noticed recently that the

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<v Speaker 1>TikTok crash out is like the newest most popular genre

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<v Speaker 1>of reality television.

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<v Speaker 2>What have you been seeing?

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<v Speaker 1>I've just been seeing so much content from creators on

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<v Speaker 1>TikTok who post themselves in states of like clear crisis.

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<v Speaker 1>But the number of people that tune in like post

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<v Speaker 1>after post, as if it's like an episode of TV unfolding.

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<v Speaker 2>Right, there's a certain voyeurism to it.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and like garnering millions of views, comments are always

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<v Speaker 1>like a mixed bag. Are they supportive, are they hating?

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<v Speaker 1>Are they making fun? It's a little bit of everything,

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<v Speaker 1>and I've just been seeing so much of it, especially

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<v Speaker 1>on TikTok, in particular with with the young people.

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<v Speaker 2>M the young people. Well, more on that in a

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<v Speaker 2>little bit, but let's talk about how we climax and cried?

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<v Speaker 1>I sweet, But first, how did we climax and how

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<v Speaker 1>did we cry? Do you want to get us started?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, I just want to note that that Heen is

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<v Speaker 2>in the studio with us today. He is, so he's

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<v Speaker 2>kind of walking around. If I hold him, you'll hear

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<v Speaker 2>his panting, so you might hear him walking around, but

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<v Speaker 2>just that's just the vibe today.

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<v Speaker 1>We have a little furry guess.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, he's the star.

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<v Speaker 1>We have a little furry friend. He's been in look

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<v Speaker 1>at though out projects before on camera.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, he has been. He has been. So I decided

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<v Speaker 2>to bring him today to get him out of the

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<v Speaker 2>house for a little bit. If anyone has a Pomeranian,

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<v Speaker 2>you know that they are not good with children. And

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<v Speaker 2>my mom is babysitting and so he's just so I'm like,

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<v Speaker 2>let's get him out and let's bring him to the studio.

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<v Speaker 2>He's never been.

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<v Speaker 1>Do they get territorial with the kids or like he

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<v Speaker 1>wants the attention that the kids are getting.

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<v Speaker 2>My theory is that Pomeranians have Napoleon syndrome and so

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<v Speaker 2>the little children are like close.

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<v Speaker 1>To his size.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, so he's like a little threat and buy them.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not sure, but he is just not good with them.

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<v Speaker 1>They're like other little creatures invading his territory.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, so that's why he's joining us today. But

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<v Speaker 2>in terms of climax and cry, well, let me start

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<v Speaker 2>with my climax, Like, well, yes, let me start with

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<v Speaker 2>my climax. I was one of eight hundred runners that

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<v Speaker 2>ran from Altadina to the Palisades. Now, before you get

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<v Speaker 2>too impressed, it was a relay, so I did six

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<v Speaker 2>miles and I was in a team of five, so

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<v Speaker 2>each of us did about six miles. So the organizer

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<v Speaker 2>of this event, Silver Lake Track Club, shared with us

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<v Speaker 2>on Saturday morning that they raise fifty thousand dollars collectively

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<v Speaker 2>and that money is going to various wildfire relief organizations,

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<v Speaker 2>like our friends over at Endelon, the National Day Labors

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<v Speaker 2>Organization Network, and so that was really cool. And so

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<v Speaker 2>it was just a really beautiful experience being out in

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<v Speaker 2>the community running with a bunch of runners with this

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<v Speaker 2>one cause in mind. And obviously races tend to have

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<v Speaker 2>this philanthropic component to it, but this just felt so

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<v Speaker 2>different because it was going to the wildfire relief. So

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<v Speaker 2>that was I think my climax for the week.

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<v Speaker 1>That's fabulous. And it was a relay. Did you guys

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<v Speaker 1>have batons?

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<v Speaker 2>We didn't have batons, but I did see other groups

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<v Speaker 2>have batons and they were really fun ones, Like I

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<v Speaker 2>saw like one of those plastic fake chickens ha ha.

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<v Speaker 2>I saw like a little critter. They're called like Smiski's

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<v Speaker 2>I think that's how you pronounce it. And they're just

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<v Speaker 2>like little little like men, like little figurine like little

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<v Speaker 2>bodies that have a little face and they're green. Oh

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<v Speaker 2>and they're just tiny. And so I saw one one

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<v Speaker 2>team have that. So that was cute.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, very fun. That sounds like a great time running

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<v Speaker 1>for a cause.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Absolutely. How about your cry?

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<v Speaker 2>My cry? What is my cry for the week? Oh,

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<v Speaker 2>there's so many things to cry about. Oh no, so

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<v Speaker 2>just generally speaking, just state of the world, Elon musk

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<v Speaker 2>Ai all of it, rfk Junior. I'm just like I'm

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<v Speaker 2>sad about it all the time. So I mean that's

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<v Speaker 2>near my general answer for the week.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it is dire. It is dire, but I feel like,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, we lived through nine to eleven.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, We've lived through lots of things. I think just

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<v Speaker 2>my sadness comes from so much being dismantled at a

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<v Speaker 2>policy level, and so I'm like, yes, we will survive

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<v Speaker 2>this historic event, these quote unpreceded times that like we've

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<v Speaker 2>been living through. It's all unprecedented, like for whatever group

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<v Speaker 2>is living at the moment. But yeah, I think more

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<v Speaker 2>so that's what I've been sad about PBS NPR, like

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<v Speaker 2>all that funding. I saw a couple of bookstores arts

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<v Speaker 2>organizations that had their funding cut because they were receiving

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<v Speaker 2>grants from the National Endowment of the Arts. So like midyear,

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<v Speaker 2>they're like funding is being cut and so or their

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<v Speaker 2>grants are being withheld, like just kidding, we're taking this back.

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<v Speaker 2>So it's just a very dire time for the arts

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<v Speaker 2>right now and just for this country for funding, and

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<v Speaker 2>so that's definitely been on my mind this week.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, the arts and education. I saw also that Donald

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<v Speaker 1>Trump wants to cut the federal grad plus loans in

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<v Speaker 1>twenty twenty six. So if you want to go to

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<v Speaker 1>graduate school and you're thinking about taking out educational loans,

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<v Speaker 1>do it this year because they might not be available

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<v Speaker 1>come twenty twenty six.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah. I mean, I still have my student loans from

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<v Speaker 2>undergrad and I have been a little on edge about them.

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<v Speaker 2>They're small enough that I can pay them off. But

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<v Speaker 2>at the same time, I was kind of hopeful that

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<v Speaker 2>student loans were going to get canceled during the Biden administration,

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<v Speaker 2>so I was like, I'm going to just pay the

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<v Speaker 2>minimum because what if they get canceled. I'm just going

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<v Speaker 2>to keep it, pushing pay the minimum. And now we

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<v Speaker 2>know that that's not happening. And so I logged into

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<v Speaker 2>my student loan portal and they were no longer there.

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<v Speaker 2>They were sold to another company. They're quote in forbearans,

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<v Speaker 2>and I'm like, what does that mean? And so apparently

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<v Speaker 2>that just that's what they call it when they're sold

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<v Speaker 2>to another company, and so they're not delinquent, but just

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<v Speaker 2>the whole thing is just unnecessarily stressful.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Yeah, you and I both with the student loans.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm sure lots of our listeners are.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah, we never really talked about that. God, but

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<v Speaker 2>because it's one of those things where you stuff it

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<v Speaker 2>down under, you do not. I do not want to

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<v Speaker 2>talk about this.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but we have loans. We have plenty of loans,

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<v Speaker 1>and I'm accumulating more and that's fine. We'll see what happens.

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<v Speaker 1>Those are really good climaxes and christs.

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<v Speaker 2>It's all in the name of education. Something I think

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<v Speaker 2>both of our parents instilled in us was like pursuing

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<v Speaker 2>higher ed and my dad growing up San Medico, he

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<v Speaker 2>always told me like and so that was like something

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<v Speaker 2>that was really important to him that we like pursued

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<v Speaker 2>higher education. I don't think you should like go into

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<v Speaker 2>debt like by any means necessary. But I also don't

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<v Speaker 2>think like funding should be a reason you don't go

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<v Speaker 2>to school.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh of course. Yeah, it's this unfortunate reality in the

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<v Speaker 1>United States in particular, that tuition money is a barrier. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>and access to funding to pay that tuition is a

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<v Speaker 1>barrier to entry for a lot of fields. I mean, like,

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<v Speaker 1>I was just learning about this board exam that my

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<v Speaker 1>friend Liliah has to take, and just to schedule the exam,

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<v Speaker 1>it costs nine hundred dollars.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh wow.

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<v Speaker 1>You know that's just to like get a date on calendar.

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<v Speaker 2>Wow.

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<v Speaker 1>And there's other fees and then if you don't take it,

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<v Speaker 1>or if you fail, you have to take it again.

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<v Speaker 1>It's just like and that's one one test in the

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<v Speaker 1>in the grand scheme of the whole like med school journey.

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<v Speaker 2>But AnyWho, how did you climax? How did you.

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<v Speaker 1>Cry onto me? Mike? Climax is my climax. I feel

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<v Speaker 1>is on its way, okay, because I'm going to EADC

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<v Speaker 1>this weekend, which is my first rave. I've never been

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<v Speaker 1>to a rave. And I'm going to DC for the

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<v Speaker 1>first time with my partner. We're very excited. We've been

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<v Speaker 1>getting ready basically since November, and the prep and all

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<v Speaker 1>that has just been really fun and we're really looking

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<v Speaker 1>forward to it. He also he went to EDC when

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<v Speaker 1>he was like a senior in high school, when it

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<v Speaker 1>was at the.

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<v Speaker 2>College the coliseum when people died.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, when people died, because then it got.

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<v Speaker 2>Osted because the following year wasn't the first time they

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<v Speaker 2>did it in Vegas, And I went.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, did you really? What was that? So it was

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<v Speaker 1>the first year in Vegas? What was that?

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<v Speaker 2>Like? Well, I was not even eighteen. I like, use actually,

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<v Speaker 2>let me not incriminate myself. I was not eighteen, but

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<v Speaker 2>I went. And I think because I wasn't a raver,

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<v Speaker 2>it was just like it was fun. It was fun

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<v Speaker 2>for that age, you know, and like being up all night,

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<v Speaker 2>but you know, I wasn't like partaking in the things

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<v Speaker 2>that people do at rave.

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<v Speaker 1>Sure.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh I think that also, you know, made it like, Okay,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm tired, let's two three am, let's go.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. It's what I've been told is it's a marathon

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<v Speaker 1>of an experience. It's three days and you basically are

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<v Speaker 1>sleeping all afternoon and all morning and then like heading

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<v Speaker 1>out to the rave. That's Vegas, like at six pm.

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<v Speaker 2>That's Vegas for you.

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<v Speaker 1>And I don't really do Vegas. I've never been to Vegas. Girl.

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<v Speaker 1>I know it's like it's like the thing to do

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<v Speaker 1>for a lot of people, like.

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<v Speaker 2>A write a passage for some people.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. I went to Vegas a couple of times, maybe

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<v Speaker 1>in my early twenties with my friend and my sister,

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<v Speaker 1>but it never really appealed to me.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, there are some people, like I have family members

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<v Speaker 2>who love to go to Vegas. They have their annual trips.

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<v Speaker 2>That's like never been my style either.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I'm excited for you, thank you, thank you. I

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<v Speaker 1>will report back. Yes, I have my looks, I have

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<v Speaker 1>my outfits.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, are you going to tease any of the outfits

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<v Speaker 2>like on socials? Are you gonna wait or are you

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<v Speaker 2>going to show anything? You know what?

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<v Speaker 1>I kind of did tease an outfit already because when

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<v Speaker 1>I went to Cowboy Carter, I wore pieces that.

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<v Speaker 2>Was a fabulous look, thank you so much.

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<v Speaker 1>I wore pieces of my like Saturday edc look with

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<v Speaker 1>like this denim jumpsuit cue so that was kind of

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<v Speaker 1>a tease of its own. And then I'll wear the

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<v Speaker 1>full thing and post it.

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<v Speaker 2>What is your cry for the week?

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, my cry for the week? You know, Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>let's be frank. We've been talking like podcasting stuff. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>and like we you know, I think we try and

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<v Speaker 1>share here and there, like growing pains and being like

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<v Speaker 1>entrepreneurs and self employed and working in the podcasting industry

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<v Speaker 1>and doing all the things that we do is fabulous

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<v Speaker 1>and so fun. But there also are these like obstacles,

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<v Speaker 1>and these moments were like, Okay, we have to like

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<v Speaker 1>make an assessment, yeah, and make a pivot and game

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<v Speaker 1>plan and take action. And so the podcast is in

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<v Speaker 1>this like moment of pivotal like like nothing but opportunity

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<v Speaker 1>for growth first of all, Yes, but it's a in

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<v Speaker 1>a moment where like we're pivoting.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah. I don't want to put too much pressure on us,

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<v Speaker 2>but it does feel like a pretty big year in

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<v Speaker 2>like both the positive and like in a challenging way,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, And so I.

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<v Speaker 1>Feel that, Yeah, so you know, just there's work to do,

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<v Speaker 1>that's all.

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<v Speaker 2>There's always work to be done.

0:11:30.040 --> 0:11:32.480
<v Speaker 1>There's always work to be done. But I mean it's good.

0:11:32.840 --> 0:11:36.040
<v Speaker 1>You know, it's good. It's like a living thing is

0:11:36.080 --> 0:11:40.040
<v Speaker 1>gonna grow and you go through its ups and downs.

0:11:40.200 --> 0:11:44.760
<v Speaker 1>That means it's live. Yeah, there's blood pumping. So yeah,

0:11:44.920 --> 0:11:47.600
<v Speaker 1>more from us, more from us, we're teasing news.

0:11:48.040 --> 0:11:50.880
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Also on social oh yeah, more to come. This

0:11:51.120 --> 0:11:56.040
<v Speaker 2>is I think the most not growth, but I guess

0:11:56.160 --> 0:11:59.520
<v Speaker 2>newness that we're bringing to not just look at thought

0:11:59.520 --> 0:12:02.280
<v Speaker 2>a radio, but just as a production company. And so

0:12:02.440 --> 0:12:06.920
<v Speaker 2>with that, it's I think we've in some ways wanted

0:12:07.000 --> 0:12:09.599
<v Speaker 2>things to look a certain way or like be perfect,

0:12:09.880 --> 0:12:12.480
<v Speaker 2>or just you know, wait for the right opportunity. But

0:12:12.520 --> 0:12:14.360
<v Speaker 2>I think what we've learned in the last couple of

0:12:14.440 --> 0:12:16.679
<v Speaker 2>weeks especially, is like you just have to do it.

0:12:16.880 --> 0:12:17.120
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:12:17.160 --> 0:12:18.760
<v Speaker 2>There are actually a lot of people that have been

0:12:18.840 --> 0:12:22.840
<v Speaker 2>in the industry for less years that are putting out projects,

0:12:22.880 --> 0:12:26.880
<v Speaker 2>that are putting out opportunities, and I don't know what

0:12:26.920 --> 0:12:29.040
<v Speaker 2>we've been waiting for. I mean, I know why. Internally,

0:12:29.080 --> 0:12:30.880
<v Speaker 2>we know why. But it does kind of give you

0:12:30.920 --> 0:12:32.600
<v Speaker 2>that point of reflection of is like, all right, let's

0:12:32.640 --> 0:12:35.080
<v Speaker 2>just do it. Then everyone else is doing something, let's

0:12:35.080 --> 0:12:35.520
<v Speaker 2>do it too.

0:12:35.760 --> 0:12:37.840
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. We've had a lot of ideas in the works

0:12:38.480 --> 0:12:40.720
<v Speaker 1>over the years. Like we've been ideating for a long

0:12:40.760 --> 0:12:44.040
<v Speaker 1>time and we've put out a lot of work. I mean,

0:12:44.200 --> 0:12:46.720
<v Speaker 1>I'm still really proud of Senora sex Ed and having

0:12:46.800 --> 0:12:50.199
<v Speaker 1>two shows. Oh yeah, you know at iHeart is no

0:12:50.400 --> 0:12:54.319
<v Speaker 1>small feat. But there's more, more, more to do, more

0:12:54.320 --> 0:12:54.680
<v Speaker 1>to come.

0:12:55.880 --> 0:12:58.760
<v Speaker 2>Don't go anywhere, lokomotives. We'll be right back.

0:13:03.640 --> 0:13:05.839
<v Speaker 1>And we're back with more of our episode.

0:13:06.960 --> 0:13:10.319
<v Speaker 2>All right, well, thank you for listening to Climax and Cry.

0:13:10.400 --> 0:13:11.720
<v Speaker 2>Let's get into o Ye.

0:13:11.679 --> 0:13:16.959
<v Speaker 1>Lookas you are now listening to oh ya now.

0:13:17.000 --> 0:13:20.440
<v Speaker 2>This question was submitted to us on our social media

0:13:20.600 --> 0:13:23.920
<v Speaker 2>channel on Instagram called look Amos. You can join for

0:13:24.160 --> 0:13:27.319
<v Speaker 2>more bts and also submit questions to Oya Lookas. This

0:13:27.520 --> 0:13:30.360
<v Speaker 2>question is how do you keep up with self maintenance

0:13:30.720 --> 0:13:34.240
<v Speaker 2>like nails, hair, skin, makeup? All of my life, I've

0:13:34.280 --> 0:13:36.320
<v Speaker 2>been a low maintenance girl, but I'm changing.

0:13:37.240 --> 0:13:39.760
<v Speaker 1>I love that I am changing. You have always been

0:13:39.800 --> 0:13:42.439
<v Speaker 1>really good with that is like always going in for

0:13:42.520 --> 0:13:46.080
<v Speaker 1>your lash fills and getting your nails filled and doing

0:13:46.120 --> 0:13:48.160
<v Speaker 1>it on a regular basis.

0:13:48.559 --> 0:13:52.480
<v Speaker 2>Yes, yeah, I am a high maintenance person. I don't

0:13:52.480 --> 0:13:54.520
<v Speaker 2>consider it high maintenance because it just feels like this

0:13:54.679 --> 0:13:56.360
<v Speaker 2>is just who I am and this is just a

0:13:56.440 --> 0:14:01.480
<v Speaker 2>part of me. Something I've been kind of not laughing.

0:14:01.640 --> 0:14:04.760
<v Speaker 2>Something I've been kind of sitting with and I say

0:14:04.800 --> 0:14:07.920
<v Speaker 2>this kind of playfully but also seriously, is like I

0:14:08.200 --> 0:14:12.559
<v Speaker 2>have to keep my nails forever because with kind of

0:14:12.640 --> 0:14:17.520
<v Speaker 2>this puritan conservative culture, you know, coming back in terms

0:14:17.559 --> 0:14:19.640
<v Speaker 2>of fashion, I'm like, oh, I have to keep my

0:14:19.760 --> 0:14:23.520
<v Speaker 2>nails long, Like I can't have short nails. As it's

0:14:23.560 --> 0:14:25.720
<v Speaker 2>a political statement now. I mean it's always been, but

0:14:25.880 --> 0:14:29.120
<v Speaker 2>especially now because I have been feeling like I'm lifting more,

0:14:29.160 --> 0:14:31.880
<v Speaker 2>I'm playing tennis, Like maybe I should shorten my nails.

0:14:31.920 --> 0:14:33.800
<v Speaker 2>Maybe I should do something a little more low key.

0:14:34.320 --> 0:14:36.640
<v Speaker 2>That is not who I am, and it is a

0:14:36.720 --> 0:14:41.080
<v Speaker 2>political statement for me. It's an extension of my politics. Right,

0:14:41.120 --> 0:14:43.320
<v Speaker 2>We've talked about Femi's politics for a long time. So

0:14:43.440 --> 0:14:45.200
<v Speaker 2>I think for that reason, it doesn't feel like, oh,

0:14:45.240 --> 0:14:46.920
<v Speaker 2>I gotta go do this. It feels like, Okay, I

0:14:47.000 --> 0:14:49.560
<v Speaker 2>get to do this, Like to have the luxury to

0:14:49.640 --> 0:14:52.520
<v Speaker 2>do my hair. I've been a redhead for three years.

0:14:52.680 --> 0:14:55.840
<v Speaker 2>That's not inexpensive, that's not a cheap thing to do,

0:14:56.600 --> 0:14:59.040
<v Speaker 2>and I've made it work. And yeah, that's how it

0:14:59.080 --> 0:14:59.560
<v Speaker 2>feels for me.

0:15:00.360 --> 0:15:06.520
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I am a really appreciate your consistency. It's because

0:15:06.560 --> 0:15:08.720
<v Speaker 1>I know that it's like it's scheduling and its work

0:15:08.800 --> 0:15:12.960
<v Speaker 1>and it's time and it's money. Me personally, like I

0:15:13.880 --> 0:15:17.080
<v Speaker 1>am getting back into my nails and lashes, which I've

0:15:17.120 --> 0:15:19.960
<v Speaker 1>always dabbled in here and there, but I feel like

0:15:20.040 --> 0:15:23.240
<v Speaker 1>I've been more of like I'll do the nails and

0:15:23.240 --> 0:15:26.080
<v Speaker 1>the lashes if there's like an occasion, if there's an

0:15:26.120 --> 0:15:30.560
<v Speaker 1>event maybe, But I've always always also been a fan

0:15:30.640 --> 0:15:32.640
<v Speaker 1>of the strip lash. You know, it's there when you

0:15:32.760 --> 0:15:34.720
<v Speaker 1>need it and at the length that you want it

0:15:34.880 --> 0:15:38.280
<v Speaker 1>and just for the for the night, you know. I

0:15:38.440 --> 0:15:43.160
<v Speaker 1>also have like such anxiety about like personally, like I've

0:15:43.320 --> 0:15:46.720
<v Speaker 1>I've always had a lot of anxiety about like the

0:15:47.040 --> 0:15:50.560
<v Speaker 1>false lashes, pulling out my natural lashes and then being

0:15:50.680 --> 0:15:52.760
<v Speaker 1>stuck in a cycle of feeling like I need to

0:15:52.840 --> 0:15:55.840
<v Speaker 1>constantly get lashes put on because I'm losing my natural

0:15:55.960 --> 0:15:59.280
<v Speaker 1>lash right, and like that's a cycle that terrifies me

0:15:59.440 --> 0:16:01.800
<v Speaker 1>that I know want to be a part of. Yes,

0:16:02.240 --> 0:16:04.400
<v Speaker 1>you know, and I know, and my mom has been

0:16:04.440 --> 0:16:09.120
<v Speaker 1>wearing false lashes every week for decades because she performs

0:16:09.160 --> 0:16:13.080
<v Speaker 1>on stage. And so I've also always like learned from

0:16:13.120 --> 0:16:16.240
<v Speaker 1>her and watched her as far as giving her lashes

0:16:16.280 --> 0:16:19.200
<v Speaker 1>like a chance to recover totally, you know, and like

0:16:19.440 --> 0:16:22.040
<v Speaker 1>letting them go back and like doing the latis and

0:16:22.160 --> 0:16:26.160
<v Speaker 1>all that stuff, because like all that is so delicate,

0:16:26.240 --> 0:16:27.880
<v Speaker 1>you know, And then we hear stories about like, oh,

0:16:28.040 --> 0:16:30.400
<v Speaker 1>like women who overpluck their brows and they never go back.

0:16:30.720 --> 0:16:32.680
<v Speaker 1>These things just have always maybe nervous, but.

0:16:32.960 --> 0:16:35.640
<v Speaker 2>Yes, that's that was the thing. Well, yeah, I also

0:16:35.720 --> 0:16:37.480
<v Speaker 2>feel like lashes are the one thing I'm okay with

0:16:37.600 --> 0:16:40.440
<v Speaker 2>letting go where I'm like, I kind of I go

0:16:40.520 --> 0:16:43.760
<v Speaker 2>through that cycle as well. And it's actually it's been

0:16:43.800 --> 0:16:46.320
<v Speaker 2>harder for me to wear contacts because of the lashes.

0:16:47.120 --> 0:16:49.360
<v Speaker 2>That's why I wear glasses a lot. Yeah, and I

0:16:49.440 --> 0:16:52.640
<v Speaker 2>think it's because I'm blinking less. This is my my

0:16:52.880 --> 0:16:55.360
<v Speaker 2>non medical professional opinion.

0:16:55.720 --> 0:16:57.360
<v Speaker 1>You blink less when you have the lashes.

0:16:57.560 --> 0:16:59.400
<v Speaker 2>This is what I'm thinking, Like, my eyes are getting

0:16:59.480 --> 0:17:03.120
<v Speaker 2>dryer because of the lashes. Interesting, so that's why contacts

0:17:03.160 --> 0:17:06.760
<v Speaker 2>bother me. Now, Oh is my thought process.

0:17:06.880 --> 0:17:09.440
<v Speaker 1>It's just a lot going on, yes on one little

0:17:09.480 --> 0:17:13.720
<v Speaker 1>eye or little eyeballs. Yeah, but they're beautiful, but like

0:17:13.840 --> 0:17:15.960
<v Speaker 1>they're beautiful and you always look like done.

0:17:16.320 --> 0:17:18.440
<v Speaker 2>Yes, that is That's what keeps me going.

0:17:18.680 --> 0:17:20.600
<v Speaker 1>You always look done and you don't have to do

0:17:20.760 --> 0:17:22.000
<v Speaker 1>like a full face of hair.

0:17:22.119 --> 0:17:25.359
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. You know, my mom used to dye her eyebrows

0:17:26.160 --> 0:17:29.520
<v Speaker 2>back in the nineties, and my mom has lost a

0:17:29.680 --> 0:17:32.320
<v Speaker 2>lot of like almost all of her eyebrow hair, right,

0:17:32.640 --> 0:17:35.399
<v Speaker 2>and it is something that she's self conscious of. So whenever,

0:17:35.560 --> 0:17:37.000
<v Speaker 2>like I go to the salon and they're like, do

0:17:37.040 --> 0:17:39.080
<v Speaker 2>you want to dye your eyebrows to match your hair,

0:17:39.119 --> 0:17:40.879
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, no, I will color them in.

0:17:41.520 --> 0:17:41.639
<v Speaker 1>Now.

0:17:41.720 --> 0:17:44.560
<v Speaker 2>There's so many reasons, like she could have lost her

0:17:44.640 --> 0:17:47.480
<v Speaker 2>eyebrow hair. Yeah, but that is one of the things

0:17:47.520 --> 0:17:49.200
<v Speaker 2>she feels like, Wow, I wonder if it was the

0:17:49.280 --> 0:17:51.840
<v Speaker 2>hair dye because it was meant for her scalp not

0:17:51.960 --> 0:17:52.399
<v Speaker 2>for face.

0:17:52.760 --> 0:17:56.879
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, absolutely absolutely, And all those little hairs everything is

0:17:56.960 --> 0:18:00.320
<v Speaker 1>just so delicate and all little follicles are delicate. So

0:18:00.520 --> 0:18:03.440
<v Speaker 1>I don't know, I feel like, obviously do you, yes,

0:18:03.600 --> 0:18:08.320
<v Speaker 1>always do you? And whatever fits your lifestyle. Yeah, like

0:18:08.480 --> 0:18:12.520
<v Speaker 1>with school and like handling equipment. The nails were not realistic, yeah,

0:18:13.000 --> 0:18:17.480
<v Speaker 1>and yeah, but I love them, you know, And I

0:18:17.600 --> 0:18:20.760
<v Speaker 1>just feel so polished when I have everything done, so

0:18:21.240 --> 0:18:23.399
<v Speaker 1>I think enjoy it and like have fun with it.

0:18:23.920 --> 0:18:27.280
<v Speaker 2>There's also I think, I mean, in addition to the economy,

0:18:27.359 --> 0:18:29.920
<v Speaker 2>there's been a rise of press on nails, and that

0:18:30.080 --> 0:18:33.440
<v Speaker 2>just feels like a low maintenance trick, similar to the

0:18:33.520 --> 0:18:36.280
<v Speaker 2>strip lashes. You have them when you want them. You

0:18:36.320 --> 0:18:38.240
<v Speaker 2>don't have to be committed to them for like a

0:18:38.320 --> 0:18:41.399
<v Speaker 2>full cycle of a set. You can just pop on

0:18:41.480 --> 0:18:42.120
<v Speaker 2>the press ons.

0:18:42.600 --> 0:18:44.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. And I've been seeing a lot of beautiful brands,

0:18:44.840 --> 0:18:49.040
<v Speaker 1>oh yeah, with gorgeous options and like long ones. You know,

0:18:49.160 --> 0:18:51.280
<v Speaker 1>it's not your like your CBS brand.

0:18:51.400 --> 0:18:55.080
<v Speaker 2>No, there's like designer press on nails now.

0:18:55.440 --> 0:18:57.080
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and I feel like they're getting pretty good with

0:18:57.160 --> 0:18:58.040
<v Speaker 1>the adhesive they.

0:18:57.960 --> 0:18:59.960
<v Speaker 2>Are, They're getting better. Yeah, that's what I would worry.

0:19:00.840 --> 0:19:03.399
<v Speaker 2>During twenty twenty, I was wearing press ons because I

0:19:03.480 --> 0:19:05.880
<v Speaker 2>wanted to feel like a little semblance of myself.

0:19:06.080 --> 0:19:07.320
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so it would pudemic.

0:19:07.520 --> 0:19:09.400
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I would put press ons on because I wasn't

0:19:09.400 --> 0:19:11.200
<v Speaker 2>going to the nailsal on like many of us, and

0:19:11.280 --> 0:19:13.479
<v Speaker 2>that did make me feel like a little put together.

0:19:13.760 --> 0:19:17.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, absolutely, So thank you for that question. I think

0:19:17.640 --> 0:19:19.960
<v Speaker 1>it's it's on the minds of a lot of a

0:19:20.040 --> 0:19:23.280
<v Speaker 1>lot of batties. Yes, we love it. It's okay to

0:19:23.320 --> 0:19:25.119
<v Speaker 1>take a break. It's always going to be there. The

0:19:25.119 --> 0:19:27.040
<v Speaker 1>beauty industry is not going anywhere.

0:19:26.800 --> 0:19:29.480
<v Speaker 2>No, no, if anything, if you're going to splurt on anything,

0:19:29.520 --> 0:19:32.080
<v Speaker 2>in my opinion, get a facial. That's the one thing

0:19:32.160 --> 0:19:34.200
<v Speaker 2>I think, like, if you're going to give yourself only

0:19:34.280 --> 0:19:38.360
<v Speaker 2>one luxury, is like, get the facial. Because depending where

0:19:38.400 --> 0:19:40.600
<v Speaker 2>you live, I mean anywhere you live, there's pollution, if

0:19:40.640 --> 0:19:44.000
<v Speaker 2>you're working out, there's just our skin barrier gets damaged.

0:19:44.040 --> 0:19:46.399
<v Speaker 2>And I think that that's one good splurge if you

0:19:46.440 --> 0:19:47.919
<v Speaker 2>want to call it a splurge, Like if you can

0:19:48.000 --> 0:19:51.480
<v Speaker 2>only spend on one, I think it should be the facials.

0:19:51.880 --> 0:19:55.399
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, like good skin, glowing skin is going to like

0:19:55.640 --> 0:19:58.000
<v Speaker 1>take you farther than most everything else.

0:19:58.640 --> 0:20:01.400
<v Speaker 2>Agreed, I agree with that. Don't go anywhere, lokomotives.

0:20:01.560 --> 0:20:07.960
<v Speaker 1>We'll be right back, and we're back with more of

0:20:08.040 --> 0:20:08.800
<v Speaker 1>our episode.

0:20:10.040 --> 0:20:11.600
<v Speaker 2>Well, let's get into today's topic.

0:20:11.840 --> 0:20:16.080
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, So today we're talking about the millennial

0:20:16.240 --> 0:20:21.600
<v Speaker 1>breakdown and the gen Z crash out. We're seeing similarities,

0:20:21.840 --> 0:20:25.160
<v Speaker 1>we're seeing there's like a trajectory, there's like a timeline

0:20:25.240 --> 0:20:28.760
<v Speaker 1>here from millennial breakdown to gen Z crash out. And

0:20:28.920 --> 0:20:31.239
<v Speaker 1>we're just gonna like talk through it because we've been

0:20:31.320 --> 0:20:32.520
<v Speaker 1>noticing some things.

0:20:32.960 --> 0:20:37.119
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I mean, and let's define crash out. What is

0:20:37.160 --> 0:20:37.880
<v Speaker 2>a crash out?

0:20:38.640 --> 0:20:42.199
<v Speaker 1>So from what I've seen on TikTok, it can mean

0:20:42.240 --> 0:20:43.120
<v Speaker 1>a couple different things.

0:20:43.200 --> 0:20:45.520
<v Speaker 2>Okay, it can be used as a noun, all right.

0:20:45.800 --> 0:20:50.040
<v Speaker 1>Sometimes the girlies post oh, like in reference to themselves,

0:20:50.560 --> 0:20:53.200
<v Speaker 1>when you're a retired crash out and blah blah blah

0:20:53.200 --> 0:20:53.720
<v Speaker 1>blah blah.

0:20:53.920 --> 0:20:58.600
<v Speaker 2>Okay, this meaning I used to lose it, all right.

0:20:58.640 --> 0:21:03.480
<v Speaker 1>And freak out on people or myself back in the day,

0:21:03.680 --> 0:21:06.760
<v Speaker 1>but now I don't. Okay, that's my understanding. So that's

0:21:06.800 --> 0:21:11.560
<v Speaker 1>a noun. It's self referential. I've also seen it as like, oh,

0:21:11.680 --> 0:21:15.160
<v Speaker 1>this is an experience someone is having. Someone is crashing out.

0:21:15.320 --> 0:21:16.280
<v Speaker 2>Okay, they're like.

0:21:16.520 --> 0:21:20.200
<v Speaker 1>Unwinding, they're unraveling, they're having some type of a meltdown.

0:21:20.760 --> 0:21:24.440
<v Speaker 1>And at this point people are posting their own crash

0:21:24.480 --> 0:21:28.240
<v Speaker 1>outs and putting them right online. So that's my understanding.

0:21:28.400 --> 0:21:31.080
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, so definitely rooted in like a mental health crisis

0:21:31.359 --> 0:21:33.600
<v Speaker 2>is how I've understood it. There's a lot of different

0:21:33.640 --> 0:21:36.720
<v Speaker 2>ways folks online talk about mental health crises, like the

0:21:36.840 --> 0:21:38.680
<v Speaker 2>crash out, the mentib.

0:21:38.840 --> 0:21:39.920
<v Speaker 1>The mentib r.

0:21:40.320 --> 0:21:43.040
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, yeah, and so but like calling it what

0:21:43.200 --> 0:21:46.200
<v Speaker 2>it is in simple terms, it is a mental breakdown.

0:21:46.400 --> 0:21:47.720
<v Speaker 2>It's a mental health crisis.

0:21:48.200 --> 0:21:50.879
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, And I think that's what's what's interesting is the

0:21:52.280 --> 0:21:56.000
<v Speaker 1>the content and oh, this is a crashout. It's entertaining.

0:21:56.320 --> 0:21:59.960
<v Speaker 1>Sometimes people find it funny. A lot of these video

0:22:00.160 --> 0:22:02.959
<v Speaker 1>will garner lots of views. I remember when Gaby Hannah,

0:22:03.560 --> 0:22:08.639
<v Speaker 1>who is like a musician slash like influencer, Gabby Hannah,

0:22:08.720 --> 0:22:11.399
<v Speaker 1>had a very public what would be described as a

0:22:11.440 --> 0:22:15.520
<v Speaker 1>crash out, and like many many videos, many posts, many episodes,

0:22:16.080 --> 0:22:19.440
<v Speaker 1>and after a while, you see in the comment and

0:22:19.560 --> 0:22:23.080
<v Speaker 1>the comments folks starting to sort of the tone shifts

0:22:23.600 --> 0:22:26.520
<v Speaker 1>and it goes from like, oh, like, you know, we're

0:22:26.560 --> 0:22:31.040
<v Speaker 1>hating on Gaby Hannah. We think she's like I don't know,

0:22:31.560 --> 0:22:35.960
<v Speaker 1>we think she's ridiculous too. We think that she's not okay,

0:22:36.640 --> 0:22:38.960
<v Speaker 1>and she's like clearly in the middle of a mental

0:22:39.000 --> 0:22:39.560
<v Speaker 1>health crisis.

0:22:39.600 --> 0:22:40.200
<v Speaker 2>Okay, got it.

0:22:40.520 --> 0:22:43.359
<v Speaker 1>And then at some point, for those who were following,

0:22:43.400 --> 0:22:46.760
<v Speaker 1>because I was following, I was watching, at some point

0:22:46.960 --> 0:22:49.359
<v Speaker 1>somebody who was watching all this happen and all her

0:22:49.400 --> 0:22:53.320
<v Speaker 1>posts online showed up at her house and got into

0:22:53.400 --> 0:22:56.600
<v Speaker 1>her home and then there's a video of her realizing like,

0:22:56.760 --> 0:22:59.600
<v Speaker 1>oh my god, this is a random person, get out

0:22:59.640 --> 0:23:02.440
<v Speaker 1>of my house. Okay, So it was like it was

0:23:02.480 --> 0:23:05.159
<v Speaker 1>a really wild time. She's not the only one. I

0:23:05.280 --> 0:23:08.760
<v Speaker 1>think that there's like just more private people who end

0:23:08.840 --> 0:23:12.280
<v Speaker 1>up opening TikTok accounts and posting like their unraveling. But

0:23:12.359 --> 0:23:17.240
<v Speaker 1>then we have like these other celeb and like creator types,

0:23:17.880 --> 0:23:20.040
<v Speaker 1>like a Nikita Dragon for example.

0:23:20.800 --> 0:23:25.600
<v Speaker 2>Right, And I haven't really followed these like celeb quote

0:23:25.680 --> 0:23:29.800
<v Speaker 2>crash outs on TikTok or Instagram. They just don't really

0:23:30.840 --> 0:23:33.680
<v Speaker 2>reach my algorithm. But sometimes I learn about them after

0:23:33.760 --> 0:23:36.639
<v Speaker 2>the fact. And I was reading about or I was

0:23:36.680 --> 0:23:40.680
<v Speaker 2>watching a video about Justin Bieber allegedly having a crash

0:23:40.720 --> 0:23:46.200
<v Speaker 2>out after Selena Gomez's engagement announcement in her album all

0:23:46.280 --> 0:23:49.399
<v Speaker 2>of that, and that was when I kind of started

0:23:49.440 --> 0:23:52.040
<v Speaker 2>seeing like, oh, he's having like a mental health crisis.

0:23:52.280 --> 0:23:55.480
<v Speaker 2>But I couldn't actually track down like the original videos,

0:23:55.520 --> 0:23:57.639
<v Speaker 2>and I like wasn't really going to deep dive into it.

0:23:57.800 --> 0:24:00.720
<v Speaker 2>But that was when I started kind of picking up like, Okay,

0:24:00.760 --> 0:24:04.119
<v Speaker 2>wait a second, we're talking about it in different ways now.

0:24:04.560 --> 0:24:08.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, absolutely, when we were younger, it was not a

0:24:08.119 --> 0:24:09.240
<v Speaker 1>crash out. The term was.

0:24:09.440 --> 0:24:13.080
<v Speaker 2>Breakdown, breakdown. This celeb had a breakdown and it was

0:24:13.160 --> 0:24:15.080
<v Speaker 2>captured by paparazzi usually.

0:24:15.119 --> 0:24:18.879
<v Speaker 1>Usually Yeah, I think Justin Bieber was also like a

0:24:19.000 --> 0:24:23.080
<v Speaker 1>paparazzi situation more recently. But I do feel like I

0:24:23.119 --> 0:24:25.040
<v Speaker 1>don't know if he was posting himself per se.

0:24:25.240 --> 0:24:28.040
<v Speaker 2>Okay, okay, but but yes, I.

0:24:28.080 --> 0:24:30.959
<v Speaker 1>Feel like if you're an A lister, the paparazzi are

0:24:31.000 --> 0:24:35.600
<v Speaker 1>still out there. Oh yeah, and now people who are

0:24:35.640 --> 0:24:39.080
<v Speaker 1>not a list celebrities are almost their own paparazzi.

0:24:39.359 --> 0:24:44.280
<v Speaker 2>Yes. It it's a part of the surveillance state, right

0:24:44.400 --> 0:24:48.159
<v Speaker 2>where we're just so happy to like film ourselves us included, right,

0:24:48.280 --> 0:24:50.840
<v Speaker 2>we include ourselves in that we're so happy to put

0:24:50.920 --> 0:24:54.119
<v Speaker 2>our lives on display in these ways, and for some

0:24:54.200 --> 0:24:57.679
<v Speaker 2>people that even include like these mental health breakdowns, these

0:24:57.760 --> 0:24:58.639
<v Speaker 2>quote crashouts.

0:24:59.160 --> 0:25:03.000
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, it's it's fascinating and like we were talking

0:25:03.000 --> 0:25:05.679
<v Speaker 1>about this when we were prepping for this episode about

0:25:05.800 --> 0:25:11.200
<v Speaker 1>like Britney Spears just being straight up stocked, followed, harassed,

0:25:11.480 --> 0:25:17.560
<v Speaker 1>like she couldn't go anywhere without paparazzi following her, taking

0:25:17.600 --> 0:25:21.320
<v Speaker 1>photos of her, taking videos of her in her lowest

0:25:21.359 --> 0:25:25.200
<v Speaker 1>moments right right, And I think that that still happens,

0:25:25.320 --> 0:25:27.560
<v Speaker 1>But I don't think there's ever been a time where

0:25:27.680 --> 0:25:33.680
<v Speaker 1>like otherwise anonymous people, yeah, would have their mental health

0:25:33.720 --> 0:25:36.720
<v Speaker 1>crisis projected for millions of people to see.

0:25:37.000 --> 0:25:40.320
<v Speaker 2>That's a really good point because even someone like Britney Spears, right,

0:25:40.400 --> 0:25:43.240
<v Speaker 2>there was the free Britney movement to remove her from

0:25:43.280 --> 0:25:47.960
<v Speaker 2>her conservatorship, and then she was removed from her conservatorship

0:25:48.200 --> 0:25:52.720
<v Speaker 2>started posting online and people could not handle I think

0:25:52.920 --> 0:25:55.679
<v Speaker 2>for her mental state no where. It's like we wanted

0:25:56.240 --> 0:25:58.399
<v Speaker 2>I think in their minds, not we Mala and I,

0:25:58.560 --> 0:26:00.640
<v Speaker 2>but it's like in their minds they wanted a quote

0:26:00.680 --> 0:26:02.800
<v Speaker 2>free Brittany, but they wanted still wanted her to be

0:26:03.000 --> 0:26:06.320
<v Speaker 2>like the polished pop Brittany, pop Brittany when actually, like

0:26:06.400 --> 0:26:09.760
<v Speaker 2>this woman has so much healing to do. And so

0:26:09.920 --> 0:26:12.680
<v Speaker 2>we're then because she has a celebrity status, we're like

0:26:12.880 --> 0:26:17.159
<v Speaker 2>uncomfortable by the quote crash out or this like mental

0:26:17.240 --> 0:26:20.600
<v Speaker 2>health breakdown online. Yeah, And I think that we also

0:26:20.680 --> 0:26:23.840
<v Speaker 2>see that with like these influencers or just online folks

0:26:24.040 --> 0:26:26.160
<v Speaker 2>that have like big followings or not, like sometimes things

0:26:26.280 --> 0:26:26.840
<v Speaker 2>just go viral.

0:26:27.240 --> 0:26:31.359
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Also, what's been interesting for me to observe. Okay,

0:26:31.480 --> 0:26:35.840
<v Speaker 1>so there's somebody that I know who also has had

0:26:35.920 --> 0:26:40.879
<v Speaker 1>their own social media platform of sorts, who is recently

0:26:41.080 --> 0:26:45.879
<v Speaker 1>posting a lot of very concerning videos of themselves in

0:26:46.000 --> 0:26:51.159
<v Speaker 1>a clear like state of like crisis. But because of

0:26:51.240 --> 0:26:54.040
<v Speaker 1>this person's sort of branding and the type of following

0:26:54.119 --> 0:26:57.960
<v Speaker 1>that they've cultivated over the years, it's very interesting to

0:26:58.080 --> 0:27:01.560
<v Speaker 1>see in the comments some follow like no matter what

0:27:01.880 --> 0:27:05.600
<v Speaker 1>this person says or does, or the accusations they make

0:27:05.640 --> 0:27:08.920
<v Speaker 1>about other people, or like the comments they make about

0:27:08.960 --> 0:27:14.439
<v Speaker 1>themselves that are just clearly like histrionic and like delusional,

0:27:15.240 --> 0:27:17.840
<v Speaker 1>because of the type of following that they've cultivated, there

0:27:17.960 --> 0:27:21.960
<v Speaker 1>are there are are commenters followers who are still extremely

0:27:22.000 --> 0:27:27.120
<v Speaker 1>supportive and like validating through the things being said.

0:27:27.320 --> 0:27:31.520
<v Speaker 2>You know, they're maybe not seeing it for what it is, yes, right,

0:27:31.600 --> 0:27:35.840
<v Speaker 2>with that kind of objective lens of like wait, maybe

0:27:35.920 --> 0:27:38.040
<v Speaker 2>this person is not doing okay, Like this.

0:27:38.080 --> 0:27:40.440
<v Speaker 1>Person needs to go to the hospital, right, this person

0:27:40.520 --> 0:27:44.440
<v Speaker 1>is unwell. That was fascinating for me to observe that

0:27:46.520 --> 0:27:49.320
<v Speaker 1>you can almost have people who are are such big

0:27:49.440 --> 0:27:52.600
<v Speaker 1>fans of what you're doing that they're not seeing when

0:27:52.960 --> 0:27:56.680
<v Speaker 1>actually you're deeply unwell, and it's like the blind support yea,

0:27:57.080 --> 0:27:59.639
<v Speaker 1>you know, which I think feeds into this sort of

0:27:59.800 --> 0:28:02.360
<v Speaker 1>like cycle of then you're in a state of crisis,

0:28:02.560 --> 0:28:06.280
<v Speaker 1>you're posting, getting a lot of feedback and attention and views,

0:28:06.640 --> 0:28:10.040
<v Speaker 1>We're going to post more. It like feeds. Yes, the

0:28:10.119 --> 0:28:11.480
<v Speaker 1>mainia the delusion.

0:28:11.160 --> 0:28:14.040
<v Speaker 2>Because social media does have that dopamine effect, right like

0:28:14.280 --> 0:28:17.280
<v Speaker 2>you do. Your brain does get something out of being online,

0:28:17.880 --> 0:28:20.320
<v Speaker 2>the out of posting, out of the validation. I even

0:28:20.400 --> 0:28:25.120
<v Speaker 2>catch myself sometimes like I'm feeling really insecure today, I'm

0:28:25.160 --> 0:28:28.920
<v Speaker 2>feeling like I want affirmations, and instead of texting my

0:28:29.000 --> 0:28:31.920
<v Speaker 2>friend group, I'm like, let me post to strangers. Yeah,

0:28:32.000 --> 0:28:33.600
<v Speaker 2>And then I have to be like, wait a second,

0:28:33.960 --> 0:28:36.600
<v Speaker 2>hold on, girl, Yeah, maybe that's not the move. Post

0:28:36.600 --> 0:28:39.320
<v Speaker 2>because you want to post, but posting because you maybe

0:28:39.360 --> 0:28:42.280
<v Speaker 2>want an external validation because you're feeling sad today, you know,

0:28:42.440 --> 0:28:44.360
<v Speaker 2>is maybe not the best thing for you right now.

0:28:44.920 --> 0:28:47.400
<v Speaker 2>And so I think there's all these different levels to it.

0:28:47.520 --> 0:28:49.480
<v Speaker 2>Right There's like maybe something more extreme of like a

0:28:49.560 --> 0:28:52.800
<v Speaker 2>quote crash out having a mental health crisis online, and

0:28:52.920 --> 0:28:56.320
<v Speaker 2>then there's the maybe a quote lesser where you're seeking

0:28:56.360 --> 0:28:59.320
<v Speaker 2>external validation because of that dopamine effect, which is still

0:28:59.360 --> 0:29:01.960
<v Speaker 2>tied to like our mental health and our brain and

0:29:02.040 --> 0:29:02.640
<v Speaker 2>how we function.

0:29:02.960 --> 0:29:08.080
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and in both instances, whether it's seeking support or

0:29:08.120 --> 0:29:13.520
<v Speaker 1>attention for a crisis or seeking validation, it's going to

0:29:13.640 --> 0:29:16.480
<v Speaker 1>the same place where you are not going to find

0:29:16.520 --> 0:29:20.400
<v Speaker 1>what you actually need. Oh yeah, right, it's just it's

0:29:20.480 --> 0:29:23.960
<v Speaker 1>something else. It's a third thing. It's not help and

0:29:24.080 --> 0:29:28.880
<v Speaker 1>it's not true like love and support. It's engagement. Yes,

0:29:29.600 --> 0:29:32.320
<v Speaker 1>it's engagement, and so people are like engaging with the

0:29:33.360 --> 0:29:36.640
<v Speaker 1>need or the call or the post what have you,

0:29:37.840 --> 0:29:39.640
<v Speaker 1>but the issue is not being addressed.

0:29:40.400 --> 0:29:44.480
<v Speaker 2>And on the flip side, like, for folks watching this

0:29:44.680 --> 0:29:48.160
<v Speaker 2>type of content, why do you think we as we

0:29:48.640 --> 0:29:52.360
<v Speaker 2>like the royal we as a society because we're all

0:29:52.480 --> 0:29:54.960
<v Speaker 2>in this, we're all on social media. Maybe we don't

0:29:54.960 --> 0:29:57.960
<v Speaker 2>consume it ourselves, but why do we What is the

0:29:58.000 --> 0:30:02.720
<v Speaker 2>attraction to this type of content? We talked about voyeurism

0:30:02.760 --> 0:30:04.880
<v Speaker 2>at the top of the episode, right, is it like

0:30:05.720 --> 0:30:08.120
<v Speaker 2>does it make us feel better about ourselves? Like, oh,

0:30:08.240 --> 0:30:10.120
<v Speaker 2>we're not look at how sad they look?

0:30:10.720 --> 0:30:14.360
<v Speaker 1>Can't lie? Sometimes it does make it feel better about myself. Yes, actually,

0:30:14.480 --> 0:30:18.000
<v Speaker 1>like okay, things might be tough, but they're not here,

0:30:18.160 --> 0:30:21.400
<v Speaker 1>So they're not here. That's horrible. But I think I'm

0:30:21.480 --> 0:30:24.400
<v Speaker 1>just being honest, can't help it. That's that's sometimes an

0:30:24.440 --> 0:30:27.479
<v Speaker 1>immediate like who I hope they get everything they need,

0:30:27.840 --> 0:30:29.800
<v Speaker 1>and I hope that if I was in this type

0:30:29.840 --> 0:30:32.360
<v Speaker 1>of a state that my loved ones would like say

0:30:32.400 --> 0:30:34.600
<v Speaker 1>something and intervene and step in. But I also think

0:30:34.640 --> 0:30:39.240
<v Speaker 1>it's the same phenomenon watching a crash out on TikTok

0:30:39.480 --> 0:30:42.640
<v Speaker 1>and like tuning in is not that different from watching

0:30:42.720 --> 0:30:45.480
<v Speaker 1>a crash on the freeway, and how traffic.

0:30:45.400 --> 0:30:48.320
<v Speaker 2>Always slows, always stops the looky loose.

0:30:48.400 --> 0:30:50.760
<v Speaker 1>No matter what. Yeah, no matter like the size of

0:30:50.800 --> 0:30:54.760
<v Speaker 1>the crash, the traffic always slows down because people want

0:30:54.760 --> 0:30:58.200
<v Speaker 1>to get a look at the crash. It's the same thing.

0:30:58.680 --> 0:31:01.440
<v Speaker 2>I think that is like a right of Like it's

0:31:01.480 --> 0:31:04.040
<v Speaker 2>like a train crash. I can't look away. Yes, I

0:31:04.080 --> 0:31:05.280
<v Speaker 2>want to look away, but I can't.

0:31:05.560 --> 0:31:07.880
<v Speaker 1>I can't. Why do we watch horror films and people

0:31:07.960 --> 0:31:11.800
<v Speaker 1>get mutilated? I mean, it's this very strange thing that

0:31:12.120 --> 0:31:15.600
<v Speaker 1>that clicks in the human mind when we see chaos

0:31:15.720 --> 0:31:16.360
<v Speaker 1>and carnage.

0:31:16.520 --> 0:31:20.320
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's very dark, very dark. I mean I think

0:31:20.360 --> 0:31:22.840
<v Speaker 2>that that raises a question like, does it give us

0:31:22.920 --> 0:31:25.800
<v Speaker 2>control or does it give us the illusion of control,

0:31:26.280 --> 0:31:30.120
<v Speaker 2>either by making this type of content or just filming ourselves,

0:31:30.160 --> 0:31:32.680
<v Speaker 2>and then it becomes content because maybe it's not with

0:31:32.760 --> 0:31:35.440
<v Speaker 2>the intention of it being content, but like you said, oh,

0:31:35.480 --> 0:31:37.360
<v Speaker 2>I'm posting it and people are engaging, so I'm going

0:31:37.400 --> 0:31:39.560
<v Speaker 2>to keep posting it, and so then it does become content.

0:31:40.320 --> 0:31:43.320
<v Speaker 2>So does it give us an illusion of control or

0:31:43.360 --> 0:31:45.120
<v Speaker 2>does it actually give us control?

0:31:45.240 --> 0:31:45.320
<v Speaker 1>Right?

0:31:45.360 --> 0:31:46.240
<v Speaker 2>I think is the question.

0:31:48.120 --> 0:31:52.360
<v Speaker 1>Yes, And control of what? Maybe control of the way

0:31:52.400 --> 0:31:52.840
<v Speaker 1>that you're.

0:31:52.760 --> 0:31:55.840
<v Speaker 2>Viewed, control of self. Maybe it feels like the only

0:31:55.920 --> 0:31:58.720
<v Speaker 2>thing you can control. I can post this online, I

0:31:58.800 --> 0:32:00.640
<v Speaker 2>can take it down if I want to, not really

0:32:00.760 --> 0:32:03.600
<v Speaker 2>write on social media anymore. You can like screen record anything.

0:32:03.880 --> 0:32:09.280
<v Speaker 2>But there is I think maybe this sense of control, Yeah, a.

0:32:09.320 --> 0:32:12.560
<v Speaker 1>Sense of control and maybe hoping maybe someone out there

0:32:12.880 --> 0:32:16.520
<v Speaker 1>will see this and will have the answer. Yeah, maybe's

0:32:16.640 --> 0:32:18.920
<v Speaker 1>one of these millions of people. Yeah, will give me

0:32:18.960 --> 0:32:20.520
<v Speaker 1>the help that I need, I will say.

0:32:20.560 --> 0:32:23.600
<v Speaker 2>I mean, I'm obviously, I think a little older than

0:32:24.520 --> 0:32:26.600
<v Speaker 2>the gen zs and the folks that we've seen do this.

0:32:26.720 --> 0:32:29.360
<v Speaker 2>But when I had my own mental health breakdown not

0:32:29.520 --> 0:32:31.280
<v Speaker 2>that long ago, the first thing I did was call

0:32:31.360 --> 0:32:34.280
<v Speaker 2>a hotline because I didn't even call my friends because

0:32:34.280 --> 0:32:35.720
<v Speaker 2>I was like, this is too heavy. I know my

0:32:35.800 --> 0:32:37.440
<v Speaker 2>friends are there for me and they will pick up

0:32:37.440 --> 0:32:39.560
<v Speaker 2>the phone if I need it, but I need to

0:32:39.600 --> 0:32:41.880
<v Speaker 2>talk to a professional. And actually didn't go that far

0:32:42.040 --> 0:32:44.800
<v Speaker 2>because as I was texting the hotline, I was like,

0:32:45.440 --> 0:32:47.600
<v Speaker 2>I think just doing it kind of like calmed my

0:32:47.720 --> 0:32:50.560
<v Speaker 2>nervous system. And I was like, Okay, I'm fine. I

0:32:50.640 --> 0:32:52.280
<v Speaker 2>need to work through this and I need to make

0:32:52.320 --> 0:32:55.120
<v Speaker 2>a game plan for the situation that I'm in right now,

0:32:55.840 --> 0:32:58.440
<v Speaker 2>but I have a handle on myself. And then I

0:32:58.520 --> 0:33:00.760
<v Speaker 2>texted my friends after I was like, in a commerce

0:33:00.840 --> 0:33:04.800
<v Speaker 2>sense state of mind, but that's me. I'm also they're

0:33:04.840 --> 0:33:07.520
<v Speaker 2>very therapized. My immediate thought was not like let me

0:33:07.640 --> 0:33:11.600
<v Speaker 2>film myself crying, right, you know, but there is it's

0:33:11.640 --> 0:33:15.280
<v Speaker 2>so normalized that I do see why people do it.

0:33:16.120 --> 0:33:18.800
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's very normalized. And I think that's a reminder.

0:33:19.400 --> 0:33:24.080
<v Speaker 1>Call a hotline. Yeah, get into therapy, go to the hospital, like,

0:33:24.240 --> 0:33:27.560
<v Speaker 1>go see a doctor, Go speak to a mental health professional,

0:33:27.680 --> 0:33:31.440
<v Speaker 1>look up an organization like NAMI. You know, there are

0:33:31.520 --> 0:33:34.440
<v Speaker 1>resources out there. TikTok itself is not a resource. It

0:33:34.520 --> 0:33:38.280
<v Speaker 1>might lead you to resources, but in and of itself,

0:33:38.760 --> 0:33:42.160
<v Speaker 1>it's not therapy. It's not a therapist. It's not a psychiatrist.

0:33:42.440 --> 0:33:43.920
<v Speaker 2>Chat GPT is not a therapist.

0:33:44.040 --> 0:33:46.120
<v Speaker 1>No, it's not. That's something else people are doing, is

0:33:46.160 --> 0:33:49.800
<v Speaker 1>like talking to their chat GPT as if it's their therapist.

0:33:50.080 --> 0:33:52.480
<v Speaker 2>That is not a replacement for therapy. All of these

0:33:52.520 --> 0:33:54.960
<v Speaker 2>things are tools, and I like AI is a tool,

0:33:55.040 --> 0:33:58.040
<v Speaker 2>whether you agree with it or not, it's obviously out

0:33:58.080 --> 0:34:01.160
<v Speaker 2>there as a tool for us, but it's not a

0:34:01.200 --> 0:34:04.240
<v Speaker 2>search engine. It's people are using it as a search engine,

0:34:05.160 --> 0:34:11.839
<v Speaker 2>but it's not a replacement for real like care, like therapy. No, right,

0:34:12.000 --> 0:34:14.840
<v Speaker 2>same with TikTok. TikTok is a tool. Social media is

0:34:14.880 --> 0:34:20.279
<v Speaker 2>a tool for us to find information, to even find misinformation, right.

0:34:21.160 --> 0:34:25.799
<v Speaker 2>And then there's therapists that become like therapy influencers. Right,

0:34:26.000 --> 0:34:29.360
<v Speaker 2>But that is just like one thing. It's not the

0:34:29.520 --> 0:34:30.080
<v Speaker 2>only thing.

0:34:30.680 --> 0:34:34.400
<v Speaker 1>Absolutely, And I think it's important also to remember, like

0:34:34.840 --> 0:34:38.600
<v Speaker 1>I think about people like Whitney Houston and Amy Winehouse

0:34:38.680 --> 0:34:42.040
<v Speaker 1>and yes Britney Spears, and like these women were so

0:34:42.239 --> 0:34:47.560
<v Speaker 1>talented global superstars had these adoring fan bases, but on

0:34:47.719 --> 0:34:50.799
<v Speaker 1>some level the fan base is also turned on them, Yeah,

0:34:50.920 --> 0:34:51.839
<v Speaker 1>and mistreated them.

0:34:52.920 --> 0:34:53.719
<v Speaker 2>Sorry say that again.

0:34:54.000 --> 0:34:56.359
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but at some point and on some level, their

0:34:56.400 --> 0:34:59.120
<v Speaker 1>fan bases turned on them and mistreated them. And we're

0:34:59.200 --> 0:35:03.799
<v Speaker 1>very unkind to them in their most vulnerable moments. Right.

0:35:04.600 --> 0:35:08.920
<v Speaker 1>And so with an audience like a TikTok audience or

0:35:08.960 --> 0:35:12.400
<v Speaker 1>an Instagram audience what have you, the audience is not

0:35:12.640 --> 0:35:15.520
<v Speaker 1>They're not really your friends and they're not really going

0:35:15.600 --> 0:35:19.040
<v Speaker 1>to take care of you, right, And it's important to

0:35:19.120 --> 0:35:21.799
<v Speaker 1>remember that too. I think when we're going to our audiences,

0:35:21.920 --> 0:35:25.600
<v Speaker 1>like asking for these types of help and support, like

0:35:25.880 --> 0:35:27.600
<v Speaker 1>you know, you got to go to like your family,

0:35:28.200 --> 0:35:31.360
<v Speaker 1>your friends, your actual in person community who knows you

0:35:31.480 --> 0:35:33.880
<v Speaker 1>and they're invested in you and they love you. And

0:35:34.239 --> 0:35:37.320
<v Speaker 1>again to like your medical team. No one's going to

0:35:37.360 --> 0:35:40.360
<v Speaker 1>be more invested in your well being than those people.

0:35:40.840 --> 0:35:43.560
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. I think you can use your social media account,

0:35:43.680 --> 0:35:46.959
<v Speaker 2>your following as a like I've said already, like a tool,

0:35:47.040 --> 0:35:50.160
<v Speaker 2>a resource in the sense that you're like, hey, where

0:35:50.239 --> 0:35:54.040
<v Speaker 2>can I find this? You know I shared you know

0:35:54.200 --> 0:35:56.120
<v Speaker 2>many years ago I used to talk about how I

0:35:56.200 --> 0:35:59.120
<v Speaker 2>found Open Path Collective to find my therapist, and that

0:35:59.280 --> 0:36:01.759
<v Speaker 2>was something that people would then ask me, like will

0:36:01.760 --> 0:36:03.719
<v Speaker 2>you posted about this one time. I still get like

0:36:03.840 --> 0:36:07.600
<v Speaker 2>dms about it, like recently and it's been years.

0:36:07.400 --> 0:36:10.040
<v Speaker 1>Now, I saw a therapists through them because you mentioned them.

0:36:10.280 --> 0:36:13.480
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, And I feel like that like using social media

0:36:13.520 --> 0:36:16.320
<v Speaker 2>in that way, right, especially if you're not a therapist,

0:36:16.400 --> 0:36:18.560
<v Speaker 2>like not giving advice, right, if you're not licensed to

0:36:18.680 --> 0:36:22.440
<v Speaker 2>like give therapy. Clearly obviously that's its own conversation. But

0:36:22.520 --> 0:36:25.040
<v Speaker 2>I think like if you're sharing resources, like that's a

0:36:25.160 --> 0:36:29.239
<v Speaker 2>good way to use social media totally, but using it

0:36:29.520 --> 0:36:32.440
<v Speaker 2>like it's a therapy, like it's therapy itself.

0:36:33.080 --> 0:36:36.360
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, And following this is another thing of there's influencers

0:36:36.400 --> 0:36:40.920
<v Speaker 1>who will post like therapy tips yeah and insights because

0:36:40.960 --> 0:36:44.960
<v Speaker 1>they themselves are in therapy. Yes, but that also is

0:36:45.080 --> 0:36:48.040
<v Speaker 1>not a replacement for actual therapy. Yeah.

0:36:48.120 --> 0:36:50.960
<v Speaker 2>I've found I've seen a couple of videos like this

0:36:51.160 --> 0:36:53.160
<v Speaker 2>and they're more so in like just and they're funny,

0:36:53.239 --> 0:36:56.200
<v Speaker 2>but there there's truth to it. It's like ways my

0:36:56.280 --> 0:36:58.800
<v Speaker 2>therapist drive me today? Yes, you know you want to

0:36:58.840 --> 0:37:00.480
<v Speaker 2>know what my therapist said to me today? Can you

0:37:00.560 --> 0:37:03.440
<v Speaker 2>believe this? Like that kind of content, And I've like

0:37:03.560 --> 0:37:05.759
<v Speaker 2>there have been times where my therapist that has said

0:37:05.800 --> 0:37:08.440
<v Speaker 2>something like really powerful and like that really made me

0:37:08.880 --> 0:37:11.319
<v Speaker 2>shift perspective on something or change my mind. And I've

0:37:11.360 --> 0:37:13.200
<v Speaker 2>thought about sharing it, like this was helpful for me.

0:37:13.440 --> 0:37:16.200
<v Speaker 2>Take it if you need it, but there's just always

0:37:16.280 --> 0:37:19.919
<v Speaker 2>something in me that like stops, not because I don't

0:37:19.920 --> 0:37:22.320
<v Speaker 2>think it's helpful, but just like who am I? Like

0:37:22.520 --> 0:37:26.760
<v Speaker 2>I'm in my own process. Everyone's experience is so unique,

0:37:27.600 --> 0:37:30.640
<v Speaker 2>shaped by everything they've lived through that it might not

0:37:30.719 --> 0:37:32.920
<v Speaker 2>actually apply to you totally. You know, it might be

0:37:33.000 --> 0:37:35.120
<v Speaker 2>helpful in some ways, but there's just always that part

0:37:35.200 --> 0:37:38.200
<v Speaker 2>of me that's like, hmm, no, that's just not my thing.

0:37:38.360 --> 0:37:40.359
<v Speaker 2>I think there was a while where I was very

0:37:40.440 --> 0:37:42.880
<v Speaker 2>much like everyone needs to be in therapy. Let's normalize

0:37:43.280 --> 0:37:45.399
<v Speaker 2>talking about therapy and going to therapy. And I still

0:37:45.480 --> 0:37:47.520
<v Speaker 2>feel that way, but it's not so much a part

0:37:47.560 --> 0:37:50.800
<v Speaker 2>of like my social media presence, if you will. But

0:37:50.880 --> 0:37:52.920
<v Speaker 2>I think for like a hot minute, it.

0:37:53.160 --> 0:37:57.520
<v Speaker 1>Was, Yeah, I think the content changes as like we

0:37:57.680 --> 0:38:02.719
<v Speaker 1>move through life. You know, uh, yeah, I love that

0:38:02.880 --> 0:38:07.080
<v Speaker 1>show Couples Therapy. It's so good. But then it's like

0:38:07.440 --> 0:38:10.640
<v Speaker 1>watching them does not mean that I'm in my own

0:38:10.719 --> 0:38:13.680
<v Speaker 1>therapy session. It doesn't mean that I've gone through a session,

0:38:14.040 --> 0:38:18.120
<v Speaker 1>you know, I'm just I'm watching somebody else do their work,

0:38:18.719 --> 0:38:20.960
<v Speaker 1>you know, but that doesn't replace doing your own work.

0:38:21.600 --> 0:38:24.839
<v Speaker 1>And yeah, I don't know. I wonder what you guys

0:38:24.880 --> 0:38:27.920
<v Speaker 1>out there think about this, if you've noticed this, the

0:38:28.080 --> 0:38:31.480
<v Speaker 1>gen Z crash out, the TikTok crash out, if it

0:38:31.600 --> 0:38:35.279
<v Speaker 1>reminds you at all of like breakdowns that we would

0:38:35.320 --> 0:38:39.480
<v Speaker 1>see of celebrities in the two thousands. For example, we

0:38:39.560 --> 0:38:41.960
<v Speaker 1>talked about Britney Spears, And I don't know, what do

0:38:41.960 --> 0:38:43.400
<v Speaker 1>you guys think about it? Like, is it just a

0:38:43.480 --> 0:38:48.120
<v Speaker 1>way for people to express themselves, is it building community?

0:38:48.239 --> 0:38:50.960
<v Speaker 1>Is it looking for support? Like is that even possible

0:38:51.040 --> 0:38:53.279
<v Speaker 1>on TikTok? I'm curious about what the listeners think.

0:38:53.760 --> 0:38:56.840
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I think at its core, there is maybe a

0:38:56.960 --> 0:38:58.799
<v Speaker 2>part of it's like I want help and I want

0:38:58.840 --> 0:39:02.440
<v Speaker 2>to be seeing people want to be seen. Especially I

0:39:02.520 --> 0:39:07.560
<v Speaker 2>think this generation that really did not experience like the

0:39:07.920 --> 0:39:11.640
<v Speaker 2>coming of age milestones because of the pandemic, right, And

0:39:11.760 --> 0:39:14.440
<v Speaker 2>I feel like that like the long term effects on

0:39:14.719 --> 0:39:18.400
<v Speaker 2>mental health and younger generations like is still to be

0:39:18.480 --> 0:39:21.759
<v Speaker 2>seen totally. And so I just wonder if there's that's

0:39:21.840 --> 0:39:22.840
<v Speaker 2>part of the piece of it.

0:39:22.960 --> 0:39:27.000
<v Speaker 1>Also, Yeah, I think what we also see online is

0:39:27.000 --> 0:39:30.960
<v Speaker 1>a lot of conversations about our attention spans, and we've

0:39:31.000 --> 0:39:34.600
<v Speaker 1>talked about this. Trends move so quickly, so I feel

0:39:34.680 --> 0:39:38.279
<v Speaker 1>like that our timing with everything is so fast, and

0:39:38.400 --> 0:39:41.960
<v Speaker 1>we move on from things and the pandemic ended, so

0:39:42.120 --> 0:39:43.719
<v Speaker 1>that's over and we're moving on now.

0:39:44.440 --> 0:39:47.000
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I feel like there's also some type of like

0:39:47.160 --> 0:39:50.360
<v Speaker 2>our brain is maybe, well, we're all traumatized, right, I

0:39:50.400 --> 0:39:52.960
<v Speaker 2>think there's a collective trauma. Millions of people died. It's

0:39:53.080 --> 0:39:56.080
<v Speaker 2>how can we not be traumatized as a society, And

0:39:56.200 --> 0:39:58.439
<v Speaker 2>so I do think there's like something in our brain

0:39:58.520 --> 0:40:03.680
<v Speaker 2>that's like defense that is behind us when it's really not.

0:40:04.000 --> 0:40:06.040
<v Speaker 2>It hasn't been that long, and the effects I think,

0:40:06.160 --> 0:40:07.799
<v Speaker 2>like I said, I think are still to be seen.

0:40:08.400 --> 0:40:11.600
<v Speaker 2>Like there's a reason we're in a loneliness epidemic. There's

0:40:11.640 --> 0:40:13.960
<v Speaker 2>a reason there's like a rise in like the Man

0:40:14.080 --> 0:40:17.719
<v Speaker 2>of Sphere, like all everything that happened in isolation. I

0:40:17.880 --> 0:40:19.719
<v Speaker 2>just think we're seeing the effects of it now. We're

0:40:19.719 --> 0:40:21.800
<v Speaker 2>seeing a trickle out into like then the public.

0:40:22.440 --> 0:40:25.239
<v Speaker 1>Oh yeah, the reverberations will last for a long time.

0:40:25.400 --> 0:40:29.440
<v Speaker 1>I think, yes to your point, this example of the

0:40:29.800 --> 0:40:34.920
<v Speaker 1>crash out and self documenting your mental health crisis for

0:40:35.480 --> 0:40:39.960
<v Speaker 1>views essentially is like a trickle, a trickle down of.

0:40:40.000 --> 0:40:43.400
<v Speaker 2>That because remember at the start of the pandemic. Obviously

0:40:43.480 --> 0:40:46.600
<v Speaker 2>this is very very subjective depending on where you lived,

0:40:46.719 --> 0:40:48.120
<v Speaker 2>the type of work that you did, but there was

0:40:48.120 --> 0:40:50.480
<v Speaker 2>a moment where like everybody was making sour dough yea,

0:40:50.480 --> 0:40:54.040
<v Speaker 2>and everyone's everyone's content on either platform was like about

0:40:54.080 --> 0:40:55.480
<v Speaker 2>making their sourdough.

0:40:55.040 --> 0:40:56.560
<v Speaker 1>Bread and delgo in a coffee.

0:40:56.800 --> 0:40:59.680
<v Speaker 2>Yes, I did that. And then it became I mean,

0:40:59.719 --> 0:41:02.799
<v Speaker 2>it's so much deeper, rite, so much more. The platforms

0:41:02.840 --> 0:41:06.799
<v Speaker 2>evolved for like us being in isolation and so yeah,

0:41:06.840 --> 0:41:08.480
<v Speaker 2>it's all it's all connected.

0:41:08.560 --> 0:41:11.359
<v Speaker 1>In my opinion, it's all connected. I also this maybe

0:41:11.480 --> 0:41:15.239
<v Speaker 1>is tangentially related. But there's also a good number of

0:41:15.280 --> 0:41:18.000
<v Speaker 1>accounts of people who like suffer from deep, deep, deep

0:41:18.080 --> 0:41:21.359
<v Speaker 1>depression and it's like, oh, come with me to clean

0:41:21.400 --> 0:41:24.279
<v Speaker 1>my depression room, yes, you know, and it's like, Okay,

0:41:24.360 --> 0:41:26.920
<v Speaker 1>this room has not been cleaned in like six months.

0:41:27.600 --> 0:41:30.000
<v Speaker 1>It's like looks like a hoarding room at this point,

0:41:30.600 --> 0:41:34.840
<v Speaker 1>and folks feeling, you know, maybe it is a motivation

0:41:35.280 --> 0:41:37.320
<v Speaker 1>to get the room clean and to move on it.

0:41:37.880 --> 0:41:40.759
<v Speaker 1>And if that helps you know, to like improve day

0:41:40.760 --> 0:41:43.000
<v Speaker 1>to day life. Then I think there's value in that.

0:41:43.200 --> 0:41:48.239
<v Speaker 1>But it is interesting how many I think, basically have

0:41:48.440 --> 0:41:52.280
<v Speaker 1>channels where this person clearly goes through a depression cycle

0:41:52.360 --> 0:41:53.960
<v Speaker 1>and now we're cleaning the room, and now they're in

0:41:54.000 --> 0:41:56.279
<v Speaker 1>their cycle again, and now we're cleaning the room. It's

0:41:56.320 --> 0:42:01.120
<v Speaker 1>a very I don't know, there's something. Uh, I don't

0:42:01.120 --> 0:42:02.120
<v Speaker 1>even have the words to do.

0:42:02.480 --> 0:42:04.720
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I see what you're saying. There's like a level

0:42:04.760 --> 0:42:07.160
<v Speaker 2>of maybe accountability. Oh, if I put it online, I

0:42:07.280 --> 0:42:08.960
<v Speaker 2>have to do it. I have to do People do

0:42:09.000 --> 0:42:11.520
<v Speaker 2>that for anything projects like oh, I'm going to I

0:42:11.560 --> 0:42:12.920
<v Speaker 2>said I was going to go run tomorrow. I'm going

0:42:12.960 --> 0:42:14.680
<v Speaker 2>to go run tomorrow. Ye. Right, But then there's like

0:42:14.760 --> 0:42:17.840
<v Speaker 2>this deeper like, oh, I need to be held accountable

0:42:18.160 --> 0:42:19.960
<v Speaker 2>for this six month pile up, so I'm going to

0:42:20.040 --> 0:42:22.160
<v Speaker 2>put it online. Yeah, and then I have to do.

0:42:22.200 --> 0:42:24.440
<v Speaker 1>It with you, right. And I feel like there's a

0:42:24.480 --> 0:42:28.840
<v Speaker 1>possibility that those people probably don't let people closest to

0:42:28.960 --> 0:42:32.080
<v Speaker 1>them see that space when it's like that, but there's

0:42:32.200 --> 0:42:35.880
<v Speaker 1>a distance between them and their TikTok following that feels

0:42:36.280 --> 0:42:38.120
<v Speaker 1>more comfortable sharing.

0:42:38.600 --> 0:42:40.440
<v Speaker 2>I feel like this season we've been talking about our

0:42:40.480 --> 0:42:43.080
<v Speaker 2>mothers a little bit more. It's because we're getting older.

0:42:43.040 --> 0:42:44.200
<v Speaker 1>We're obsessed with our mothers.

0:42:44.320 --> 0:42:46.799
<v Speaker 2>But I just think, like sometimes I'm like, imagine if

0:42:46.840 --> 0:42:51.040
<v Speaker 2>our moms knew we were posting our depression build up,

0:42:51.560 --> 0:42:53.200
<v Speaker 2>not in like I mean, our moms would shame us.

0:42:53.320 --> 0:42:55.799
<v Speaker 2>I'm not shaming you, but our moms would. And that's

0:42:55.840 --> 0:42:57.160
<v Speaker 2>what would stop me from doing that.

0:42:57.400 --> 0:42:59.880
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's like just clean your room. Yes, it's not

0:43:00.160 --> 0:43:01.439
<v Speaker 1>that simple all the time.

0:43:01.680 --> 0:43:05.160
<v Speaker 2>It's really not. If you have executive dysfunction, right, Like,

0:43:05.280 --> 0:43:09.680
<v Speaker 2>there's reasons depression is really hard. Our moms don't care.

0:43:09.800 --> 0:43:10.799
<v Speaker 2>They want you to clean your room.

0:43:10.880 --> 0:43:12.759
<v Speaker 1>They want the room clean. But you know what I

0:43:12.880 --> 0:43:17.360
<v Speaker 1>think about that too, And like, if you have someone

0:43:18.160 --> 0:43:21.759
<v Speaker 1>who is in such a funk because of mental health

0:43:22.120 --> 0:43:26.120
<v Speaker 1>that it is creating an obstruction in their daily life.

0:43:26.719 --> 0:43:29.120
<v Speaker 1>And you're not a mental health professional, your mom, and

0:43:29.200 --> 0:43:31.160
<v Speaker 1>you're just trying to keep things running. What else do

0:43:31.360 --> 0:43:34.400
<v Speaker 1>you do? Yeah, you know, And so I think sometimes

0:43:34.960 --> 0:43:39.160
<v Speaker 1>it's that that tough love that I don't think always works,

0:43:39.480 --> 0:43:41.719
<v Speaker 1>but I think it's one of the things that they

0:43:41.800 --> 0:43:42.800
<v Speaker 1>have in their arsenal.

0:43:43.280 --> 0:43:46.160
<v Speaker 2>Yes, you know, yeah, I would love a more gentle love,

0:43:47.360 --> 0:43:49.600
<v Speaker 2>but I see why they do it. I don't agree

0:43:49.640 --> 0:43:51.800
<v Speaker 2>with it all the time, but I get it again.

0:43:51.840 --> 0:43:53.360
<v Speaker 2>I think it's like when you're a mom, like the

0:43:53.480 --> 0:43:55.680
<v Speaker 2>mental load of running a house. You're like, you can't

0:43:55.680 --> 0:43:56.640
<v Speaker 2>even clean your room.

0:43:57.000 --> 0:43:57.160
<v Speaker 1>You know.

0:43:57.320 --> 0:43:59.759
<v Speaker 2>It's how they see it, right, and probably what they've

0:43:59.760 --> 0:44:02.040
<v Speaker 2>been through that whole day just to get to that

0:44:02.120 --> 0:44:04.839
<v Speaker 2>one point, right. I think about that now as I'm

0:44:04.880 --> 0:44:07.239
<v Speaker 2>older too, is like I used to think like, Wow,

0:44:07.239 --> 0:44:09.160
<v Speaker 2>how does my mom remember to do everything? And now

0:44:09.200 --> 0:44:11.839
<v Speaker 2>I'm like the fuck? What is like? What is wrong

0:44:11.920 --> 0:44:14.480
<v Speaker 2>with us? Like as not as children, but it's like

0:44:15.400 --> 0:44:18.200
<v Speaker 2>the expectation that the mom is just gonna do everything

0:44:18.640 --> 0:44:21.759
<v Speaker 2>without anyone asking like hey, wait, how how are you

0:44:21.880 --> 0:44:22.440
<v Speaker 2>handling that?

0:44:22.600 --> 0:44:23.200
<v Speaker 1>Like do you need?

0:44:23.320 --> 0:44:24.880
<v Speaker 2>Do I need to? What do I do? What does

0:44:24.960 --> 0:44:25.160
<v Speaker 2>he do?

0:44:25.400 --> 0:44:25.600
<v Speaker 1>Yes?

0:44:26.920 --> 0:44:27.320
<v Speaker 2>Exactly.

0:44:27.600 --> 0:44:30.080
<v Speaker 1>Of course we used to talk about invisible labor all

0:44:30.120 --> 0:44:30.439
<v Speaker 1>the time.

0:44:30.560 --> 0:44:31.960
<v Speaker 2>There's so much invisible labor.

0:44:32.080 --> 0:44:36.520
<v Speaker 1>So much, Oh, there's so much, there's so so much. Yeah,

0:44:36.840 --> 0:44:40.240
<v Speaker 1>it's like in a family, a mom. In a family,

0:44:40.360 --> 0:44:42.759
<v Speaker 1>every person is their own planet, and the mom is

0:44:42.800 --> 0:44:44.680
<v Speaker 1>trying to manage the whole solar system.

0:44:44.920 --> 0:44:46.759
<v Speaker 2>Yes, that's a good analogy, you know, but.

0:44:46.800 --> 0:44:49.200
<v Speaker 1>It's like but I have my whole world. Yes, I

0:44:49.280 --> 0:44:51.399
<v Speaker 1>have my own world. Okay, but yeah, there's like ten

0:44:51.520 --> 0:44:55.560
<v Speaker 1>worlds you're gonna collide, yes, you know. And so that's

0:44:55.719 --> 0:44:56.600
<v Speaker 1>like the levels.

0:44:56.800 --> 0:44:59.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, like the mom just keeps them spinning, basically.

0:44:59.400 --> 0:45:01.360
<v Speaker 1>Keeps every on their orbit.

0:45:01.560 --> 0:45:01.759
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:45:02.080 --> 0:45:05.120
<v Speaker 1>Yes, by by hook or by crook, shout out to mom.

0:45:05.320 --> 0:45:09.360
<v Speaker 2>Moms are amazing. We love moms, We love mom's. Happy

0:45:09.440 --> 0:45:12.600
<v Speaker 2>Mother's Day, Happy belated Mother's Day to all our listeners

0:45:12.640 --> 0:45:14.839
<v Speaker 2>who are moms, y'all are amazing.

0:45:14.560 --> 0:45:18.359
<v Speaker 1>Amazing, amazing, So thank your mom and clean your room.

0:45:20.520 --> 0:45:22.480
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and maybe I mean would love to hear folks

0:45:22.680 --> 0:45:27.239
<v Speaker 2>what they think about quote crash out, mental health breakdowns,

0:45:27.480 --> 0:45:30.799
<v Speaker 2>the voyeurism of it all, and questioning when you see

0:45:31.040 --> 0:45:35.239
<v Speaker 2>like a viral quote crash out and maybe actually seeing

0:45:35.320 --> 0:45:37.280
<v Speaker 2>it for what it is. It's a mental health crisis.

0:45:37.480 --> 0:45:39.120
<v Speaker 2>Maybe this person needs more support.

0:45:39.640 --> 0:45:43.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, absolutely, ask for help when you need it, seek

0:45:43.080 --> 0:45:46.320
<v Speaker 1>out resources offline, offline.

0:45:46.880 --> 0:45:50.000
<v Speaker 2>Yes, getting community. I feel like that's how I want

0:45:50.000 --> 0:45:53.400
<v Speaker 2>to end every episode. Step outside. You have to be

0:45:53.480 --> 0:45:55.839
<v Speaker 2>in community. That's the only way we're going to make

0:45:55.880 --> 0:45:56.960
<v Speaker 2>it through anything.

0:45:57.400 --> 0:46:01.280
<v Speaker 1>Join a club, take a class, get a hobby, something

0:46:01.440 --> 0:46:03.920
<v Speaker 1>something you know go visit with your cousins.

0:46:05.400 --> 0:46:08.440
<v Speaker 2>I don't know, listen to this episode with your friends.

0:46:08.719 --> 0:46:10.480
<v Speaker 2>I have a listening party. Please.

0:46:10.600 --> 0:46:11.279
<v Speaker 1>That's a great idea.

0:46:11.280 --> 0:46:11.839
<v Speaker 2>Bring it back.

0:46:12.120 --> 0:46:14.640
<v Speaker 1>That's a great idea. I would love for somebody to

0:46:14.760 --> 0:46:19.120
<v Speaker 1>host like a knitting circle and where they're like knitting

0:46:19.440 --> 0:46:22.600
<v Speaker 1>and drinking champagne and listening to this podcast.

0:46:22.840 --> 0:46:24.640
<v Speaker 2>I think you need to host. That is what it

0:46:24.719 --> 0:46:25.120
<v Speaker 2>sounds like.

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<v Speaker 1>But yes, that sounds like a fun event.

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<v Speaker 2>So that does sound like a fun event.

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<v Speaker 1>Let's do it. Let's do it all right.

0:46:30.760 --> 0:46:33.000
<v Speaker 2>Look, I'm honest. Thank you for listening to another episode

0:46:33.080 --> 0:46:36.160
<v Speaker 2>of look at Radio. We'll catch you next time. See

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<v Speaker 2>look At Radio is executive produced by viosa Fem and

0:46:41.040 --> 0:46:41.880
<v Speaker 2>Mala Munios.

0:46:42.200 --> 0:46:44.080
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie Franco is our producer.

0:46:44.520 --> 0:46:47.120
<v Speaker 2>Story editing by Me viosa.

0:46:46.920 --> 0:46:48.600
<v Speaker 1>Creative direction by Me Mala.

0:46:48.840 --> 0:46:51.759
<v Speaker 2>Look At Radio is a part of iHeartRadio's Michael Dura

0:46:51.840 --> 0:46:52.720
<v Speaker 2>podcast Network.

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<v Speaker 1>You can listen to look at Radio on the iHeartRadio

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<v Speaker 2>share with your homegirl.

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<v Speaker 1>And thank you to our local moorees, to our listeners

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<v Speaker 1>for tuning in each and every week besitos h Loca

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<v Speaker 1>Lumia