Speaker 1: Welcome to Decisions Decisions. I don't think you should say
Speaker 1: decisions decisions. It sounded like you was talking to this person.
Speaker 2: You definitely say to welcome, Welcome to the new podcast.
Speaker 2: You want to say together decisions decisions. Hey guys, girl,
Speaker 2: welcome to another episode of Decisions Decisions.
Speaker 3: You know, we got to guess some fine because we
Speaker 3: were doing different ship. Let us have somebody who we
Speaker 3: just don't care about it O.
Speaker 1: Welcome back everybody. Now, this whole got the moment. I'm
Speaker 1: your girl, man, d P, I'm weazy and it's a
Speaker 1: threesome today. That's right.
Speaker 2: We are joined by we could call them a cousin,
Speaker 2: so we're not doing incests. So technically it's not that
Speaker 2: our black fam How far my cousin removed?
Speaker 1: All right, girl, a marriage cousin or.
Speaker 4: Like distant country cousin at the cookout? Did you ain't
Speaker 4: know what you right now?
Speaker 3: When I went to my family union, there was like, oh,
Speaker 3: that's one with the white daddy, y'all.
Speaker 2: We have singer songwriter Broadway song the motherfucker Bauldy.
Speaker 3: It's all required when you're a musician to wear shirts
Speaker 3: like that, Like why do It's always just you gotta
Speaker 3: see it a little bit, a little bumps in arms.
Speaker 5: If you have it, Oh, don't come on here, even
Speaker 5: the little squinty eyes. We just need you to beg
Speaker 5: It's not my fault because it's looking.
Speaker 4: Like no, I'm not like, I'm not trying to smolder.
Speaker 3: That's when people ask you d be like, yeah, I'm
Speaker 3: a tenth Asiana.
Speaker 4: I wake up smoldering. You know what I mean? I
Speaker 4: felt I feel like I am.
Speaker 3: I think the energy though, is beautiful because like we're
Speaker 3: making fun of it, but it is also the allure
Speaker 3: to be a good singer. To me, it's having that
Speaker 3: like sexual energy, having that natural just I don't know,
Speaker 3: I don't even want to call it flirting, but it's
Speaker 3: almost like the attentiveness.
Speaker 1: Oh, I'm not gonna lie. It's what I say.
Speaker 2: Said is wrong with R and B today, Like they'd
Speaker 2: be talking about like some fuck niggas ship but they're ugly,
Speaker 2: like they're not attractive enough to be saying the things
Speaker 2: they're saying. And I'm not saying names. I'm just saying
Speaker 2: that to me is what is a little bit wrong
Speaker 2: with male R and B today? Like where is the
Speaker 2: fine ones at?
Speaker 4: You know? What and to that, I can say it's
Speaker 4: very subjective in terms of what you think is attractive.
Speaker 1: Because back in his day he looked I think he
Speaker 1: was girl.
Speaker 3: Okay, okay, I'll just try to be like he was
Speaker 3: a handsome man, but he wasn't because we're not allowed
Speaker 3: to call people that ain't not.
Speaker 4: But think about this though, it wasn't necessarily like it
Speaker 4: wasn't necessarily like if they were lookers, just like you know,
Speaker 4: just without anything right, but the presentation overall, like when
Speaker 4: you saw what Luther had on you, you saw what Martin,
Speaker 4: what what Marvin had on when you saw the temptations
Speaker 4: had on the way the way they walked it and
Speaker 4: talked it. You know what I'm saying, It was like this,
Speaker 4: Oh there's something there that is attractive. It doesn't necessarily
Speaker 4: have to be that you are physically attractive. But let's
Speaker 4: get into this word aura. Right, are your energy? You're
Speaker 4: you know what I'm saying. There are things that are
Speaker 4: attractive and these things are curated.
Speaker 1: What women do you.
Speaker 3: Think have it that are like we can call it
Speaker 3: out like who has that aura that's a singer and
Speaker 3: entertain a period, Like who do you think has it?
Speaker 3: Because to me, Alicia Wan of Alsha could wear a
Speaker 3: cargo jeans and a stud fit and we like, what
Speaker 3: it's goddess energy.
Speaker 1: It's crazy.
Speaker 4: You know what. I always refrain from from speaking on
Speaker 4: women who have husbands.
Speaker 1: I'm respectful that we don't know, as.
Speaker 4: Alicia's had it since since day one?
Speaker 2: Right, speaking of Alicia, yes, and speaking of Aura, she
Speaker 2: brought up but I got to see you live Hell's
Speaker 2: Kitchen on Broadway loosely based around Alicia Keys's story. And
Speaker 2: before you said a word? Is this a normal reaction
Speaker 2: to before you said a word? Before you did a who?
Speaker 2: The aunties in the crowd was like, whoa, honey?
Speaker 1: Was your shirt on?
Speaker 2: No girl fully clothed. He walked on stage with little
Speaker 2: squinty eyes and just like I did you did?
Speaker 4: I the piano on stage? That did not squid my eyes.
Speaker 1: While he was rolling the piano, he was like, and
Speaker 1: what I say?
Speaker 2: He didn't say a word, and the girls in the
Speaker 2: audience was just like Then he started singing, I do
Speaker 2: want to say, y'all. I know I've been talking about
Speaker 2: going to Broadway shows. I've been gassing for weeks going
Speaker 2: to coe Othello, you told us during the Black Effect
Speaker 2: Fest that you were on Broadway. I had known Health's kitchen, y'all,
Speaker 2: where's my camera? By far, probably be bad. I've never
Speaker 2: cried on Broadway until I saw this show.
Speaker 3: By the way, the girl went to see Othello day before,
Speaker 3: and I still it was gas in Hell's Kitchen.
Speaker 1: No, so I said, I loved it. Let me tell
Speaker 1: you though, real quick.
Speaker 2: So when I see him at the Black Back Fest,
Speaker 2: I said, oh, you're on Broadway, and he's like, I'm
Speaker 2: one of the best Broadway starts.
Speaker 1: I said, you know, Denzel on it.
Speaker 2: And so I went to see Othello, went to see
Speaker 2: Hell's Kitchen, and y'all, I bawled four times. The I
Speaker 2: went with al writer tempest. I went with my good friend,
Speaker 2: uh Britt. I looked up all you here from behind
Speaker 2: us in front of us, the white people stood up.
Speaker 2: Hold on, white people stood up and said that was
Speaker 2: that was magnificent. So it's not like.
Speaker 1: And what did you say? What word did you use?
Speaker 2: I said, that was good as fucking I'm glad we
Speaker 2: was all crying together.
Speaker 1: It was so good. I do want to know how
Speaker 1: is it different?
Speaker 2: Because I'm so glad you're here today, because you've been
Speaker 2: using them vocals.
Speaker 1: How is it different from touring? And and have.
Speaker 2: You acted before, Like, how has Broadway been different for
Speaker 2: you than anything else you've done.
Speaker 4: I've done theater before. Okay, it was traveling theater, and
Speaker 4: thank god I've done that before. It kind of helped
Speaker 4: prepare me for this. But Broadway is the pinnacle, you
Speaker 4: know what I mean? When you get the Broadway, this
Speaker 4: is what theater is, super super theater on forty four.
Speaker 4: This is where you know you you are, you are
Speaker 4: made or broken, and you know, the the critique is
Speaker 4: a lot different, the excellence that is required a lot different.
Speaker 4: The people, the talent on Broadway is different. Actor, you mean,
Speaker 4: all of.
Speaker 2: It's saying all of it the Broadway culture because for
Speaker 2: most of us, we go to New York on a trip,
Speaker 2: we go on to day ticks, We just figuring out
Speaker 2: what we're going to see, right, But the culture of
Speaker 2: the people that actually go, like what's the vibe when
Speaker 2: you walk in the door.
Speaker 4: Well, Broadway is its own its own world, right, and
Speaker 4: so like our we have a og with us Keisha Lewis,
Speaker 4: who's been doing Broadway for forty years, Tony Award winner.
Speaker 2: That's the one that made she made and she was
Speaker 2: the first one to make me cry.
Speaker 4: You can tell that she is Broadway Royalty and that
Speaker 4: it is not a game.
Speaker 1: Who do you tell from?
Speaker 3: Is it the like when people come out? Is it
Speaker 3: your colleagues, like, what is the energy of Broadway Royalty?
Speaker 4: What do you mean? What is it in it? Like?
Speaker 1: Is it?
Speaker 3: Basically when she goes out in the crowd, people know
Speaker 3: exactly who she is.
Speaker 1: Is it the staff? Everybody's just like whatever you want
Speaker 1: to do?
Speaker 4: Well, no, it's it's let me say, it's universal. Right
Speaker 4: for the people who know Broadway, they know her, and
Speaker 4: that's from you know, people who attend Broadway shows as
Speaker 4: well as people who book Broadway shows, who direct Broadway shows,
Speaker 4: who like, she's on the rolodex of if you can
Speaker 4: get her, you get.
Speaker 3: Her when it comes to like one thing I've always
Speaker 3: wondered too, when you're doing Broadway, ain't no cut?
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, hannay video cut?
Speaker 4: Yeah, there's no do over?
Speaker 3: Do you improv? Do you forget? Like what happens? What
Speaker 3: is a real moment that you've had on stage?
Speaker 4: You have to be able to improv because things happen
Speaker 4: in live theater, you know what I mean. And so
Speaker 4: you know, we had a mishap where the piano is
Speaker 4: supposed to turn in a certain way. I don't think
Speaker 4: you remember the same. I don't want to give too
Speaker 4: much away.
Speaker 1: But oh I wasn't going to give the scenes away.
Speaker 4: But everything malfunctioned and we still had to deliver the scene.
Speaker 4: And sometimes you know, it's it's a lot of silly
Speaker 4: people on Broadway time. I'm silly, like I'm a goofball
Speaker 4: and a lot of our crew, a lot of our
Speaker 4: cast is goofballs too, like really talented, but we're goofballs, right,
Speaker 4: And when this thing malfunction and the way I had
Speaker 4: to come out and try to still deliver these lines,
Speaker 4: people were crying, like the cast is crying.
Speaker 1: The audience wasn't laughing. They didn't know. They didn't know
Speaker 1: the audience that's such a funny.
Speaker 4: And the light is on me. I have to stay
Speaker 4: in it. It's like it's a very serious moment, and
Speaker 4: I have twelve cast members dying laughing while I'm trying.
Speaker 4: And then it started out of nowhere and I have
Speaker 4: to get my toes on the turn about to turn
Speaker 4: with it while still like.
Speaker 2: Y'all gotta do it Key and Pill told the actors like.
Speaker 1: You just need to turn around, don't lag. You have
Speaker 1: to turn around until you get your composure back.
Speaker 2: Now, when you read the script of this, because you
Speaker 2: play a deadbeat essentially, okay, what you do, that's he's shit,
Speaker 2: that's what That's what my daddy says too, all these
Speaker 2: years later, he's trying. When you read the script, did
Speaker 2: you realize it would evoke so much emotion, because it's
Speaker 2: it's essentially without giving the whole story away with what
Speaker 2: I love is through music, through just really the character
Speaker 2: development that happens past too. You really get to see
Speaker 2: who the people are. There's a love story between young
Speaker 2: Alicia and her mom, her first crush, then.
Speaker 1: Her cheatten too much.
Speaker 2: Well, no, no, no, it's all these different stories. I'm not
Speaker 2: giving any scenes away. It's it's a seventeen year old
Speaker 2: girl battling it was Alicia's story, yeah, battling all of
Speaker 2: these relationships. And that's why I thought it was so
Speaker 2: phenomenal because the character development between her love of New York,
Speaker 2: her love of the people in her building, and then
Speaker 2: you have all of these other relationships that take place
Speaker 2: while she's learning the piano, and I'm not sure if
Speaker 2: that's like the real part. However, fit in I was
Speaker 2: just like, wow, this is magnificent. When you see the script, though,
Speaker 2: was there anything that you had to look up or
Speaker 2: any movies that inspired how you would show up as
Speaker 2: a fuck nigga on stage?
Speaker 1: Because you did it so well, you did it so well.
Speaker 1: Did you do a different accent? Did you have pieces
Speaker 1: that a little too good?
Speaker 4: The way you said all of those eloquent things have
Speaker 4: been the question that was so good? That was really
Speaker 4: I like that a lot. I got sides first, and
Speaker 4: so when you get sides, what is that it's the
Speaker 4: piece of the script that that you're going to read
Speaker 4: to audition for. Okay, So I got sides first, and
Speaker 4: I was like, okay, sides only give you but so
Speaker 4: much context, you know what I'm saying, instead of having
Speaker 4: the full script. Right, So for me it was like, Okay,
Speaker 4: I got these sides. Not even sure about doing Broadway period,
Speaker 4: but it's the Alicia Keys call. I have to answer that,
Speaker 4: And so I said, I said, how about we just
Speaker 4: go see it first as opposed to shooting in the dark,
Speaker 4: because that's what you can do a lot of times
Speaker 4: when you're auditioning and you just get sides. You're shooting
Speaker 4: in the dark, and you're so far away from the
Speaker 4: actual thing from and what they want, like you're just
Speaker 4: you're just and then your whole audition is about correction
Speaker 4: rather than you know, adjusting good choices. And so I
Speaker 4: went and saw it first the day before my audition.
Speaker 4: I said, oh, that's what that is. Got it, And
Speaker 4: you know, I didn't have to go see anything because
Speaker 4: you know, you know, I unfortunately, I do have a divorce,
Speaker 4: and I do have you know, I do have young
Speaker 4: young ladies to my first two girls who are part
Speaker 4: of that, and unfortunately you know, with them, you know,
Speaker 4: living three thousand miles away and all these things that
Speaker 4: you know, just over time, I have been part of
Speaker 4: things where I have been a disappointment, you know, to
Speaker 4: my daughters, and I've had to feel that I've had
Speaker 4: to own that. So I know what that is, you know,
Speaker 4: I know what that is on missing some birthdays. I
Speaker 4: know what it is on missing big moments, like I
Speaker 4: know what that is. I've been through it and so
Speaker 4: even now still trying to you know, repair that damage
Speaker 4: or do whatever I can do as a father now
Speaker 4: to just be there and when moments when I wasn't,
Speaker 4: that's it drew from me, you know. So it was
Speaker 4: very easy to step into this step. It was I'm.
Speaker 1: Gonna tell you, Nick Cannon could play the ship out.
Speaker 4: If you want to, you.
Speaker 3: Know, outside of the Broadway. Something I've always been curious about.
Speaker 3: It's kind of just the pivot of entertainers as they
Speaker 3: get older. When I saw the R and B money
Speaker 3: was on Black Effect, I was like, wow, can you
Speaker 3: tell me, Like, you start off with this life, you're
Speaker 3: known for this thing, and then maybe it's not your.
Speaker 1: Every day anymore. How what does the pivot look like?
Speaker 3: You Like, when you sign up to do a podcast,
Speaker 3: you're like, oh my god, I must be taking a
Speaker 3: hell Like that's how everybody treats the evolution.
Speaker 4: Of the next job. Like no, no, no, nobody asked
Speaker 4: us to do a podcast. It was it was I
Speaker 4: was like, I'm watching you know, I'm watching the terrain
Speaker 4: and I'm watching Oh I'm I'm watching all of these
Speaker 4: cool conversations ramp up about so many things, you know
Speaker 4: what I mean, so many great personalities, and and I
Speaker 4: was like, man, we need that for R and B.
Speaker 4: Like for me, it was creating something out of Anita
Speaker 4: all I was hot, like in terms of Tank, Yeah,
Speaker 4: I'm still hot. There was no decline to make me
Speaker 4: reach for something different.
Speaker 2: For me, it was adding to because you think you
Speaker 2: were like a part of like Aliah's career genuine and
Speaker 2: I know you ended up having the group later with him,
Speaker 2: like you've been a part of R and B since
Speaker 2: Mayas was in diapers not to age.
Speaker 1: You know, it's like you've had such a long standing
Speaker 1: career and you still do it.
Speaker 4: Yeah. But my conversation, so my point was to even
Speaker 4: starting it was before anybody else gets a hold of
Speaker 4: this conversation that don't know it and haven't lived it, Jay,
Speaker 4: why don't we do it?
Speaker 3: How do you feel then when you watch people talk
Speaker 3: about music, music, podcast culture commentators, do you think it
Speaker 3: is better for someone that's in it?
Speaker 4: Okay, which is why you see NFL Network now high
Speaker 4: players hee ESPN hiring the basketball players and the bait
Speaker 4: like hiring people who actually understand what it takes to
Speaker 4: do it. That's actually easy to take.
Speaker 2: Yeah, my reasoning Sometimes when people say why are show
Speaker 2: over others? I'm like, yeah, y'all understand we're actually ethically
Speaker 2: non monogamous girls.
Speaker 1: We're bisexual women.
Speaker 3: We've done all these things we talk about and saying
Speaker 3: instead of just commenting on other people's sex lives or trends.
Speaker 3: And I really love content direct from the source. Yes, okay,
Speaker 3: there's my RMB question I need to ask out of
Speaker 3: the new school R and B guys. So, like I'm
Speaker 3: someone that listens to Minnie Riverton Luthen and Brent Bias
Speaker 3: and love them all and actually might play.
Speaker 1: Them on rotation.
Speaker 3: So when it comes to new school R and B,
Speaker 3: is it easy to hate on it? Or can you
Speaker 3: appreciate the new art?
Speaker 1: Who do you like? What are your thoughts about the
Speaker 1: new vibe of R and B?
Speaker 4: Like you gotta remember that I help usher that in,
Speaker 4: you know what I mean. Trap So stuff like I
Speaker 4: had I had Ato eight's and Collapse in two thousand
Speaker 4: and seven and Please Don't Go, which was the number
Speaker 4: one record for me for fifteen weeks I Can't and
Speaker 4: the cadences you know, from me to Usher, you know
Speaker 4: all the like we we helped do that, you know
Speaker 4: what I mean. It's not a it's not a new genre,
Speaker 4: it's just more kids are doing it more kids are
Speaker 4: they They respond to it and feel it better because
Speaker 4: trap is so big now and our and our and
Speaker 4: our generation trap wasn't big like that. Yea, yeah, it
Speaker 4: got big and kind of took over everything after that,
Speaker 4: and then people are like, oh, we need more R
Speaker 4: and B to sounds like drap And I'm staying there like, well.
Speaker 3: I've been here, but what about the lyrics? Do you
Speaker 3: like hearing music like me and my visuals bucking?
Speaker 4: You know what? I can't. I don't hate on how
Speaker 4: you communicate it, you know what I'm saying because I
Speaker 4: tell every artist listen, there's a million people that say
Speaker 4: it and feel it the way you do. If that's
Speaker 4: the way you feel it, say it like I can't
Speaker 4: tell nobody how to paint, you know what I mean.
Speaker 4: If that's the case, we'd have a hundred paintings in
Speaker 4: the louver that all look just to like and they don't.
Speaker 4: So for me, it's about appreciating how you want to
Speaker 4: express your art.
Speaker 3: Even then a real R and B era see it again,
Speaker 3: it's with that said, is there even then a.
Speaker 1: Real R and B?
Speaker 4: A yes? Because we can't and which one is it?
Speaker 4: It's still right because everything evolves. It's just like saying,
Speaker 4: there's is there's still a real hip hop area era. Yeah,
Speaker 4: it just evolves it. Sometimes it sounds different, sometimes it
Speaker 4: looks different. Sometimes like before it was androgynous, Prince had
Speaker 4: the ruffles and you have to they had you have
Speaker 4: to look breed in order to really be R and B.
Speaker 4: And now it's now it's the dreads.
Speaker 1: It's almost like the center scene when you're watching of course,
Speaker 1: I'm sure you've seen it, of course three times.
Speaker 2: That scene shows you so much music's evolution that it
Speaker 2: kind of made me appreciate it because as I grown, oh,
Speaker 2: I've grown to love music. I feel like people hate
Speaker 2: on my musical choices a lot, and I'm like, damn,
Speaker 2: but shit just changes, you know, like we can fluctuate.
Speaker 2: And I appreciate hearing you say that because I am
Speaker 2: kind of tired of the new ways being the wrong one.
Speaker 4: There's no there's no wrong anything. My daughter, my daughter,
Speaker 4: my daughter loves oldies. How she and my daughter's seventeen.
Speaker 4: Oh oh, one of my daughters I have three. She
Speaker 4: she loves the oldies, but she will daddy. I need
Speaker 4: a scissor ticket. I need it, period. I have to
Speaker 4: have it. Yeah, I need a Tyler the Creator ticket.
Speaker 4: Imagine Scott the ticket Tolliver And I'm like, cool, I'm
Speaker 4: going with you.
Speaker 1: I know that's right.
Speaker 4: Let's go get it.
Speaker 1: Who's in your mount rushmore than what do you mean?
Speaker 4: In terms of R and B?
Speaker 3: Now we can pick all the time and new I I.
Speaker 1: You have to, like we asked the question, you actually
Speaker 1: have to give us. You can't start this out.
Speaker 4: I can't do four. I can't put four people on
Speaker 4: R and B. Is it fun?
Speaker 1: It's five today?
Speaker 4: You know what way to clean that up?
Speaker 1: It can spand yourself.
Speaker 4: Only say where where I drew from? That's that's all
Speaker 4: I can say.
Speaker 1: That's yours.
Speaker 4: Give me the drew from. It's not a it's not
Speaker 4: the best ever, it's it's just who I drew.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we're cutting all that out.
Speaker 4: You're going to keep all of that. It's a Kelly okay, babyface.
Speaker 1: Okay, I with that one.
Speaker 2: No, I fucked the first one to Marvin Gay, Okay,
Speaker 2: is there a woman that you were throwing there?
Speaker 3: You don't have to do it now that I said
Speaker 3: it in R.
Speaker 1: And B, Damn, he said, y'all, Ain't that good?
Speaker 4: No, no, it's it's it's not. It's not. I come
Speaker 4: from church, Okay, so a lot of a lot of
Speaker 4: my influences are gospelfluences. If I was to put you
Speaker 4: know what, I take that back, Rob Babyface, Marvin Gay,
Speaker 4: this will surprise you.
Speaker 1: Chris Brown, Oh no, that doesn't surprise me.
Speaker 2: Let's just say take believes in separating the art from
Speaker 2: the artists.
Speaker 4: I think I think that well because you gotta you know,
Speaker 4: in our in ours day, he was dependacle. The way
Speaker 4: he is doing it was I mean, he was top
Speaker 4: of the food chain. And even it wasn't just the music,
Speaker 4: it was the presentation, like when you go back to
Speaker 4: Downlaw and and and to separate those two songs from
Speaker 4: the remix to the and then add mister Biggs to
Speaker 4: it in the cinema and like he made it. He
Speaker 4: made it a movie. Nobody like outside of Michael Jackson
Speaker 4: who had done that for R and B. Like in
Speaker 4: the streets. Babyface was an artist that as a as
Speaker 4: a little kid, only singing gospel. When the girls would
Speaker 4: ask me to sing a song instead of singing what
Speaker 4: a friend we have in Jesus, I could sing a
Speaker 4: Babyface song because you know, because these were nice, good songs,
Speaker 4: good R and B songs, and that taught me how
Speaker 4: to write without all the extras.
Speaker 5: But I'll taught me how to write like your extra cut. No no,
Speaker 5: no no, yeah, I mean now the extras are great,
Speaker 5: but I learned from Babyface how how to not even
Speaker 5: need that?
Speaker 3: What if you had to choose out of these, like
Speaker 3: you know, you're Mount Rushmore, what is the perfect R
Speaker 3: and B track or artists for baby making music?
Speaker 1: Because today I'm fucking to.
Speaker 3: Naomi Sharon a little bit of Brent actually Tari's being
Speaker 3: coming in and out of there sometimes too, But for
Speaker 3: a beautiful, intimate, romantic moment, it's really not the Brint
Speaker 3: or the Naomi.
Speaker 1: Who would it be?
Speaker 3: What is who is the artist that guaranteed panties off?
Speaker 3: The fellas need this one because I don't know what
Speaker 3: the fuck the niggas be putting on.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you gotta. It depends on the woman.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that's.
Speaker 4: Because because because women, you know, women are different now,
Speaker 4: you know what I mean? Women? You see you see
Speaker 4: more women under than trap post like, so it's it's
Speaker 4: like it depends on the woman and what she owned,
Speaker 4: if she in that intimate moments, she want to smoke
Speaker 4: some weed and get some Hennessy in her body and
Speaker 4: get tossed around, or or if she you know, or
Speaker 4: if she wants some nice shot a plan and she
Speaker 4: really wants somebody look deep into her eyes. You know
Speaker 4: what I'm saying. Oh my god, Like it really depends
Speaker 4: on like because it's about listening, right, And so you
Speaker 4: have to number one, be curious and and ask questions
Speaker 4: because no one way works for everything, not in this space.
Speaker 4: You know what I mean? Women, every woman is absolutely different.
Speaker 3: You sound like about all of them.
Speaker 1: They're all like something different had the day they do.
Speaker 4: You go, I see, I'm in my day. I had
Speaker 4: nothing I'm having.
Speaker 1: I want to I want to get away from music
Speaker 1: for a little bit.
Speaker 2: But still digging into one of my favorite records from you.
Speaker 2: I made a game from When We which I love
Speaker 2: in the remix.
Speaker 1: The remix is the one. God damn it. When they
Speaker 1: say what remix is better liked? I think you made
Speaker 1: like three. There's a lot of remixes you tried.
Speaker 2: Oh my gone, no, they went bananas. If you have
Speaker 2: not heard that record one of my favorites. So I
Speaker 2: made an ice record to get you to talk a
Speaker 2: little bit, sex, little relationship, a little all the things.
Speaker 1: So this one's gonna be fun.
Speaker 2: When we bring food into the bedroom to spice things up,
Speaker 2: I always suggest you're going to finish the blank So
Speaker 2: it's a bunch of win wei's and I want.
Speaker 4: To see what you be doing when we bring food
Speaker 4: into the bedroom.
Speaker 1: Have you never brought anything into the bedroom?
Speaker 4: I've tried. And when we say food, the same food,
Speaker 4: I'll say ice. That's it.
Speaker 1: Ice, That's what I'm almost.
Speaker 4: That's the furthest we're going with food, really absolute, Wait.
Speaker 1: Why as food failed, you went and play with food?
Speaker 4: You way food like the idea of getting sticky.
Speaker 1: Okay, and I'm not mad.
Speaker 4: You gotta wipe that down, he said ice.
Speaker 1: He said, we're not making a mess. Nowhere would I go.
Speaker 4: Again? It depends. I mean the ice can go on
Speaker 4: to the ice can go in.
Speaker 1: Here. That's all he wanted to hear you saying.
Speaker 2: Now now here the interesting one into relationships.
Speaker 1: When we argue, it's.
Speaker 4: Usually because of miscommunication.
Speaker 2: Okay, period, valid. I don't think we have to go
Speaker 2: deeper into that. Now here's the fun one.
Speaker 1: When we role play, I always request to.
Speaker 4: Be now I'm just making some ship up you've never.
Speaker 2: Played before, or what would you like your partner to
Speaker 2: dress up as? Like, has there ever been a scenario
Speaker 2: where we're like, let's just have fun tonight, let's roll
Speaker 2: play something.
Speaker 1: This outfit could be role play. You want to know
Speaker 1: what it would be? Okay, all you gotta do is
Speaker 1: pull the beanie.
Speaker 4: Down you robbing all them banks and see if you
Speaker 4: can't steal.
Speaker 1: Ship.
Speaker 3: Wait, can't let me tell you if you wasn't going
Speaker 3: to play tonight, I would have invited you. So I'm
Speaker 3: going to quest loft to this game night in New York.
Speaker 4: Right.
Speaker 3: He was like, Oh, I know how much you love
Speaker 3: Sinners Ryan Coolers be there. Please don't say it, because
Speaker 3: I'm saying it every day. I'm like, please, Lord, don't
Speaker 3: let me get one to kill him play.
Speaker 2: You know what?
Speaker 1: This stated?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 1: I know, and I don't care. I don't give a ship.
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna be like, thank you so much.
Speaker 4: But you know what, and the thing about that, like
Speaker 4: with with with the role play and things like that,
Speaker 4: I'm so still aroused and amused by the simple things,
Speaker 4: you know what I mean, Like like, you know, like
Speaker 4: my wife having on a a T shirt that just
Speaker 4: just slightly shows the butchet's just a little bit and
Speaker 4: slightly shows the panty and the print up front like that.
Speaker 4: That's like, that's that's all I need. Like all like
Speaker 4: that easy, my wife, Ladies, you need something absolutely like
Speaker 4: she don't have to do a bunch of a bunch
Speaker 4: of extra anything. Now listen, I welcome it, for sure,
Speaker 4: but I don't require it. I am that much, you know,
Speaker 4: ready and available for just the thought of it. Okay,
Speaker 4: you're gonna walk around but.
Speaker 3: That have like a lot of money or affluent or
Speaker 3: can get any woman say these things that it's simplicity,
Speaker 3: like you ain't even got to do too much.
Speaker 4: No, I don't. I find that people with more access
Speaker 4: get bore quickly, you know what I mean, and they
Speaker 4: have to find other ways, more ways to be stimulated.
Speaker 2: I think right now a lot of us actually do,
Speaker 2: whether you have money or not, because you can literally
Speaker 2: open up your Twitter app or open up the Internet
Speaker 2: and it's all right there, all right there.
Speaker 1: Now, I want to role play with you just a
Speaker 1: little bit. The last question.
Speaker 2: When we're in public, and I whisper in your ear,
Speaker 2: I'm telling you finish and I want you to whisper
Speaker 2: it so the audience can hear you.
Speaker 3: I want to devour oh fe on the bank, train,
Speaker 3: the animus and ship.
Speaker 2: Okay, we love a big word, and so devour is
Speaker 2: not a big word.
Speaker 1: Girl. Somebody could say, eat Mandy, I will take devow.
Speaker 4: What you're doing.
Speaker 3: Devour my flower, Devour my fly.
Speaker 4: There you have there, there you have it.
Speaker 1: Devour my flower. Now I do.
Speaker 2: It wouldn't be us if we had this whole conversation
Speaker 2: with you and didn't bring up some of the things
Speaker 2: you've said out in public. But before we get there,
Speaker 2: we have our book, No Holds Barred, a dual manifesto
Speaker 2: of sexual exploration and power coming out. And I wanted
Speaker 2: to read a little excerpt from my chapter. Can I
Speaker 2: put it back there? This is my chapter around my
Speaker 2: sexual views on the anus, and this is just the
Speaker 2: few first sentences when I first started fucking. I believe
Speaker 2: that if a man wanted to put it in my
Speaker 2: ass that he was gay, period, point blank. You could
Speaker 2: not tell me otherwise. My Rajanelle was that if I
Speaker 2: had this glorious pussy, and I do that there was
Speaker 2: no reason he should want to put it in the
Speaker 2: back door. To me, when it came to heterosexual sex,
Speaker 2: there were only two acceptable orphices, my vagina and my mouth.
Speaker 2: I thought of anal sex is something that only gay
Speaker 2: men did, and looking back, I attribute this blatant misconception
Speaker 2: to many things, including my youth, lack of sexual education,
Speaker 2: and let out ignorance.
Speaker 1: Now, this chapter goes from my views on.
Speaker 2: Me receiving anal sex and then me ben and men
Speaker 2: over with a strap. So I had two views on
Speaker 2: just anal sex is a pleasurable.
Speaker 1: Spot for people.
Speaker 2: Now, this chapter, for me, vividly speaks about just where
Speaker 2: we are taught a lot of ignorance in terms of
Speaker 2: loving ourselves, pleasing ourselves, what it looks like to communicate that,
Speaker 2: and specifically within the black community stemming from homophobia.
Speaker 1: Now, you've said some things across the internet where people
Speaker 1: were like what the fuck.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: One is that you admitted that you like your legs
Speaker 2: being raised during oral sex, which we find to be
Speaker 2: very vanilla, very easy, like you just like to be comfortable,
Speaker 2: you know. The other one is I think if a
Speaker 2: guy suckstick twice, he's not gay. Now I would like
Speaker 2: to know how you became so confident and comfortable and
Speaker 2: not only speaking about sex publicly, but what that looks
Speaker 2: like with your partners and how you're navigating teaching black
Speaker 2: men specifically to not be shamed and unlearned the unhealthy
Speaker 2: things we've learned about sex.
Speaker 4: I think it's more about you know, being open to conversations, okay, right,
Speaker 4: and listening to people of other lifestyles, of other whatever
Speaker 4: that for you may not make sense, but to discredit
Speaker 4: or downgrade their existence, it's not fair within that. And
Speaker 4: so you know, me coming from where I come from,
Speaker 4: you know, I come from heavy homophobia, okay, heavy Like
Speaker 4: it took me a long time to assimulate to the
Speaker 4: quote unquote Hollywood environment because you know, I'm kid from Maryland,
Speaker 4: you know what I mean, and from the church and
Speaker 4: all of these things, and so where a lot of
Speaker 4: these things are are are like frowned upon in a sense.
Speaker 4: Now you come to Hollywood and you know, homosexuality it's prevalent, right,
Speaker 4: And for me, it was very uncomfortable in the beginning.
Speaker 4: My stylist is is a gay man. I study you
Speaker 4: know this, this person here is and I'm like, I'm.
Speaker 1: Like, at least have you got a good stylist.
Speaker 4: I'm like, I don't. I don't like, like, you know
Speaker 4: what I'm saying, I don't. I don't. I don't like
Speaker 4: the way looking at what I'm putting these clothes on.
Speaker 4: I don't like. And it's all in my mind. I'm
Speaker 4: assuming all of these things and it's not until I'll
Speaker 4: tell you what happened. I signed Young Lady. She was like,
Speaker 4: she was an openly gay rapper Messiah.
Speaker 2: Oh, she was on the TV show.
Speaker 4: Yes. I signed her, and I signed her because I
Speaker 4: thought I thought she was well she is. I thought
Speaker 4: she was the most incredibly talented human being from singing, songwriting.
Speaker 4: I thought she was like a drake. I was like,
Speaker 4: you're dope. I don't know what all's going on with you.
Speaker 4: I don't understand anything that's going on with you, but
Speaker 4: you're dope. And I signed her and she needed a
Speaker 4: place to stay, and I was like, you know, you
Speaker 4: can stay with me, and I really I started asking
Speaker 4: her questions.
Speaker 1: About her sexuality. She's a woman, yes, and it's easier
Speaker 1: for you to do that with a woman versus a man.
Speaker 4: That was just the opportunity that presented itself. And I
Speaker 4: just started asking her questions and I'm like, well, how
Speaker 4: and why? And as opposed to just you know, trying
Speaker 4: to make my belief stick, what kind of questions?
Speaker 1: Yeah, would you ask?
Speaker 4: Well? The first was why?
Speaker 1: Why?
Speaker 4: Why are you gay?
Speaker 3: I say I had that reaction because for someone that's
Speaker 3: so open about gayness, I feel like, the why is
Speaker 3: any easy one?
Speaker 1: Like because I like it this way.
Speaker 4: Now it's easy, I understand it. And I'm like, I'm like,
Speaker 4: why are you gay? Like why? How?
Speaker 1: Like?
Speaker 4: Maybe we'll mix them together? And she was like, I
Speaker 4: was ever since I can remember desiring anything, I desired
Speaker 4: a woman. Okay, I said, interesting, I says you you
Speaker 4: you're telling me you were born this way? She said,
Speaker 4: I was absolutely born this way. And I had to
Speaker 4: take that into consideration outside of all the things I
Speaker 4: had been taught into spirit you can pray it out,
Speaker 4: it's nothing but the devil and all of these things
Speaker 4: that I had been taught. And I had to look
Speaker 4: at this woman who was honestly telling me, as long
Speaker 4: as I can remember, I've only wanted a woman, and
Speaker 4: to this day, I've never wanted a man.
Speaker 3: I was like, you know, what's interesting to hear a
Speaker 3: man say? And I I liked hearing you say it.
Speaker 2: This way because I've described this to men, like when
Speaker 2: you're confused, think about innately how you want women.
Speaker 3: That is literally how my gay friends view it. Is
Speaker 3: like I wake up, I feel this, I embody this.
Speaker 3: It's the same thing, yes, And then we're trying to
Speaker 3: convince you. Imagine me trying to tell you loving your
Speaker 3: wife is bad. Now, that could be an extremity in this,
Speaker 3: but when it comes to sexuality, Oh.
Speaker 4: It's not the extreme. It's what it's You're right.
Speaker 1: Okay, you're right, loving your wife would be bad, right.
Speaker 4: For because that's how strongly we believe yep, that how
Speaker 4: we help. That's as strongly we believe against that. Yeah,
Speaker 4: it's the same thing reversed. And so like you know,
Speaker 4: one of my good friends style is Brian Javar, And
Speaker 4: I'm like, oh.
Speaker 1: And then you started asking him the same question.
Speaker 4: Well, just you know, just even us in in in
Speaker 4: being friends, right, you know what I'm saying, Like I
Speaker 4: kindle and that's being friends. And it's like you realize
Speaker 4: that who you are is who you are, right and
Speaker 4: just because that's your friend or just because you know
Speaker 4: y'all hang out on the case, doesn't mean that you're
Speaker 4: that yeah, doesn't mean that this becomes you. And so
Speaker 4: a lot of times with men, you know, especially you know,
Speaker 4: but when we were in that hyper masculine space, we
Speaker 4: don't want nothing around us that's going to chip away
Speaker 4: at that masculinity. We don't want nobody associated with us
Speaker 4: that's gonna chip away at that masculinity. And that, to
Speaker 4: me is an insecurity.
Speaker 3: How did you go from that brain to being a guy?
Speaker 3: I remember the day you said it. I was smiling,
Speaker 3: laugh I'm like.
Speaker 4: This, I just you gotta stop worrying about what everybody
Speaker 4: else thinks.
Speaker 1: Because you still believe that today. What is that dick twice?
Speaker 4: And I well, how comes twice? I know that? And
Speaker 4: when when the number was put on it, that was all.
Speaker 4: But I do know that again, in speaking with with
Speaker 4: people who are gay, they are actually gay. It's not
Speaker 4: it wasn't an experiment once in high school or an
Speaker 4: experiment once in college, and then they actually found them
Speaker 4: their true selves and now they exist in whatever way
Speaker 4: that is. No, it's no, this is what I am
Speaker 4: and this is how I'm living. This is my life.
Speaker 4: I kind of stopped saying lifestyle, right, this is my life.
Speaker 4: I am. I am gay that's what they're saying. And
Speaker 4: so I think that there's a great difference between people
Speaker 4: who have tried things and people who are things. That
Speaker 4: was my point.
Speaker 1: I like to a lifestyle word, just take that.
Speaker 4: Out of context because it's the internet. The internet, and
Speaker 4: then it went from a story about somebody to me,
Speaker 4: and that's the ignorance of social media. But I don't
Speaker 4: you know, again, none of that bothers.
Speaker 1: You know. I never thought it was you.
Speaker 3: But one thing I did think when I saw it
Speaker 3: was something I say often.
Speaker 1: This is a memory that will stick out to me forever.
Speaker 1: Although gay, I grew up in the South, I know
Speaker 1: how we think of men that are gay. I used
Speaker 1: to even sometimes have that language. When I was young.
Speaker 3: I never believed niggas could be by you know, I
Speaker 3: was one of them. Girl, Like, now once you do it.
Speaker 1: You gay.
Speaker 3: Go to Europe with my best friend. He's on a
Speaker 3: date with a dude in Rome. He's like, girl, this
Speaker 3: place is lit, come meet us. I show up to
Speaker 3: the bar and the guy was like, oh my god,
Speaker 3: there's Italian dude. He's like, he didn't tell your friend
Speaker 3: looked like this, mind you They was kissing.
Speaker 1: He's like, I want to fuck to both of you.
Speaker 1: So I'm laughing because I was a movie. Oh it
Speaker 1: felt like a movie. We're in Europe.
Speaker 3: I'm twenty one and we're on this boat in Italy
Speaker 3: and my friend is like, I really don't want to
Speaker 3: fuck you, but he's fine, I want to fuck it too,
Speaker 3: but now you.
Speaker 1: A can like I ain't got a choice.
Speaker 3: And this guy back and forth all night is touching
Speaker 3: both of us, so into us and I went home.
Speaker 1: Called my mom.
Speaker 2: The next day, I was like, Wow, Europe and men
Speaker 2: have the freedom to be gay. I didn't say they're
Speaker 2: really by there are exploring sexuality, but they actually can
Speaker 2: do this.
Speaker 1: I believed it.
Speaker 3: I believed men could be by From that day I
Speaker 3: watched this guy the way he was attracted back and forth,
Speaker 3: and it made me sad because I know black men
Speaker 3: don't have that.
Speaker 1: What black men where I'm gonna pull up and that
Speaker 1: could happen where.
Speaker 4: In La Well, I don't think it's I don't think
Speaker 4: it's dedicated to black men, right, you think it's.
Speaker 2: An American thing, because I do feel like it might be.
Speaker 3: I think white people can play around a little bit.
Speaker 3: I don't think black men can. I think black women
Speaker 3: can play around, but.
Speaker 4: It also like it also has a lot of history
Speaker 4: reconnected to it when it comes to black men, right,
Speaker 4: I don't it's not just reserved for black men, but
Speaker 4: when you think about the history of black men in
Speaker 4: America specifically, and and the methods that were used to
Speaker 4: make to e masculate and make us less than that's
Speaker 4: where it gets kind of triggering for black men. But
Speaker 4: you know, ultimately, I think and just believe that you're
Speaker 4: you're gonna be what you are, and in terms of
Speaker 4: finding people who are like you or or or or
Speaker 4: are into the things that you're into, you just have
Speaker 4: to be patient and in figuring out who and where
Speaker 4: those people are.
Speaker 1: That's a good point. Finding your tribe is all that
Speaker 1: matter is.
Speaker 4: Somebody, and that's really all that matters. You know. I
Speaker 4: was I was sitting on the plane next to a
Speaker 4: young guy football player and he was like, you know,
Speaker 4: how do I manage all of this? He's got the money.
Speaker 4: You know, he's he's on TV. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4: They all own them, you know what I'm saying. He's like,
Speaker 4: I'm a I'm a young you know, I grew up
Speaker 4: in the church. I think I know what's right, and
Speaker 4: I'm just what what do I do? And I said,
Speaker 4: and I said, I said, young fella, good luck, fuck luck,
Speaker 4: young rich fella. Do it how you would like to
Speaker 4: do it, Like honestly and unapologetically do it how you
Speaker 4: would like to do it, and make sure that the
Speaker 4: people within this space, all who are involved, understand what
Speaker 4: that is. I was like, be honest, be honest with yourself,
Speaker 4: and be honest with the person or the people around you,
Speaker 4: and live it exactly how you want to live it
Speaker 4: and judge from there. Decide from there like what works
Speaker 4: and what doesn't work. But while you're young, and while
Speaker 4: you have options, do what you would like to do.
Speaker 4: Don't hurt nobody, you know what I mean, But do
Speaker 4: what you want to do.
Speaker 1: He basically said, put a condom on a fuck them all.
Speaker 2: I cannot wait to put violent strings behind you, saying
Speaker 2: that that was so beautiful.
Speaker 4: You to do, because it's because.
Speaker 1: Not what everyone thinks that you would be feeling.
Speaker 4: You should do, or you know, because there's so many
Speaker 4: influences and so many traditions that can lead you into
Speaker 4: a space that you don't belong in.
Speaker 1: Yeah, how long did it take?
Speaker 2: You to figure that out and to get in a
Speaker 2: space where you're at now.
Speaker 4: I mean, I'm forty nine, so even at forty nine,
Speaker 4: I'm still evolving, learning and growing.
Speaker 3: I only didn't make the shock face because I googled it.
Speaker 4: So so you know, even a lot of the ideas
Speaker 4: that I speak of now are are years old. You
Speaker 4: know what I mean, because you know, still learning, still evolving,
Speaker 4: and and still still growing into a space where everything
Speaker 4: for me is grace.
Speaker 1: I love that now for decisions decisions.
Speaker 2: Yes, we get into relationships though, and I want to
Speaker 2: talk to you and hopefully our audience can take some
Speaker 2: tips from you as well on how to find love again.
Speaker 1: Now.
Speaker 2: I talked about double backing and we kind of made
Speaker 2: the synopsis here that it doesn't work. Once you lose somebody,
Speaker 2: you shouldn't go back and xyz elemental P. However, you
Speaker 2: took a break from your wife and fiance wife, y'all
Speaker 2: have been together for the spand of like twenty years altogether,
Speaker 2: but y'all took about six years of a break you
Speaker 2: co parented. I want to know what it looked like
Speaker 2: for you to take that space and find your way
Speaker 2: back and how you.
Speaker 4: Got back you know what I wish. I wish that
Speaker 4: I had the science on it right, Okay, because we
Speaker 4: didn't actually get together. We hadn't known each other for
Speaker 4: she danced on my first video. We hadn't known each other,
Speaker 4: you know, kind of offing on, messing or whatever, messing around.
Speaker 4: We didn't get together until like two thousand and four,
Speaker 4: broke up in like two thousand and six, then had
Speaker 4: a baby in two thousand and seven. And during all
Speaker 4: this time there was you know, there's a lot of beef,
Speaker 4: you know what I mean. I don't like you. You know,
Speaker 4: maybe you don't like me a little bit, but I
Speaker 4: really don't like you. And she was moving on doing anything.
Speaker 4: I was moving on doing my thing, what have you.
Speaker 4: And in the midst of a breakup, you know, we're
Speaker 4: still cold parenting cool people's. She was always super solid
Speaker 4: as a as a mom, okay, super solid to co
Speaker 4: parent with, like just rolled with roll with all punches,
Speaker 4: and not all the punches were fair, but she rolled
Speaker 4: with them, you know what I mean, super solid. And
Speaker 4: after a breakup, we just started we started talking more,
Speaker 4: you know what I mean. And just because it's like
Speaker 4: the second time around, like those conversations communications are easier. Okay,
Speaker 4: you're not hiding as much anymore, Like you didn't sing
Speaker 4: the worst of it. Now the conversations are really on,
Speaker 4: like well this is how I feel, and well this
Speaker 4: is how I feel, and you're able to have those
Speaker 4: conversations and nobody takes it away, doesn't feel a way,
Speaker 4: And so we were able to communicate what I feel
Speaker 4: like at a higher level on this re entry, which
Speaker 4: just which just felt weird to me because in my mind,
Speaker 4: I was like, I'll never ever in a million years
Speaker 4: be with this woman and the same and and and
Speaker 4: then all of a sudden, we're having these high level
Speaker 4: conversations about friendship and life, and you know, they were like,
Speaker 4: we want to go to the movies.
Speaker 3: Maybe it's because the romance is taken out. Do you
Speaker 3: think there's I know you don't have the science, but
Speaker 3: I have heard people say when the pressure is gone,
Speaker 3: they can have this resurgence of romance.
Speaker 4: I think it was. I think it was. It wasn't
Speaker 4: romance at first, it was like we truly became friendship. Friendship.
Speaker 1: What did it looks like? Like? How did you forgive
Speaker 1: someone that you literally said at one point.
Speaker 4: I like her at all Forgiveness is about accountability on
Speaker 4: whose end listen, okay, listen. Forgiveness is about looking in
Speaker 4: the mirror as a as a person who is not
Speaker 4: trying to forgive, and saying to the person in the mirror,
Speaker 4: he without sin cast the first like you got caught.
Speaker 4: I didn't, but we being real, I was do that.
Speaker 1: M hmm.
Speaker 4: If we being real, I was old that universe had
Speaker 4: to get I got to eat that. Oh for being real.
Speaker 1: And you knew how you showed up and the ship
Speaker 1: that you had done.
Speaker 4: I knew what was in the dark, even if she
Speaker 4: didn't know. And and and and men are really good
Speaker 4: at that. How dare you? How dare you text that? Dude?
Speaker 4: How dare you respond to that? Dam? M hm?
Speaker 1: Do you know? Oh, we can't wait?
Speaker 2: Get my notepas and you just basically are like, I
Speaker 2: know what the hell I'm doing?
Speaker 4: We gotta we gotta, we gotta be real and the
Speaker 4: in me and me looking myself in the mirror and
Speaker 4: tell them and being truthful about who I am and
Speaker 4: what I was was Was's how I was able to
Speaker 4: be like you know what, I'm not perfect, She's not perfect.
Speaker 1: The mean thing that caused a riff.
Speaker 4: Somewhat somewhat Yeah?
Speaker 1: Is it just for women listening?
Speaker 3: I made a joke you know when I was like, oh,
Speaker 3: you know this is hohost shit earlier whatever? Is it
Speaker 3: almost inevitable with someone in entertainment because of the options?
Speaker 3: Is it almost inevitably inevitable because it's like it's being
Speaker 3: thrown at you at your lifestyle the character of tank
Speaker 3: versus who you are at home?
Speaker 1: Like, is it is it hard to avoid?
Speaker 4: It? Is that it is also inevitable in your youth? Right?
Speaker 1: Well? You consider like, so when do they stop? Tell
Speaker 1: you women, for the most.
Speaker 4: Part, when you're young. When you're young, I'm gonna say
Speaker 4: for women and men, women get horny as motherfucker.
Speaker 1: Too, and they don't know. We was host most of
Speaker 1: my friends.
Speaker 4: Cheek listen when you're young and hot and bothered and
Speaker 4: won't it should happens? Should happen?
Speaker 3: What age do you think there's a shift for men though,
Speaker 3: when they like, hey, having it too?
Speaker 4: Not even there now? If they got these pills out.
Speaker 4: You know, I got a new line. Uh uh stiff
Speaker 4: bull bang bang tea. We will get to all of that. Yeah,
Speaker 4: you have a new line.
Speaker 3: I've been trying to dilute my man's mocker root, Like
Speaker 3: I know how horny is.
Speaker 4: Listen you, that's funny. I think that again a lot
Speaker 4: of times I say everything is based on the individual
Speaker 4: and and and the experience it is. It is like,
Speaker 4: no nobody can make you do anything, like like, yep,
Speaker 4: no situation can make you do anything. It has to
Speaker 4: be for you. You know what I'm saying. If you're going
Speaker 4: to be solid and faithful or if you're not, it's
Speaker 4: it's on you.
Speaker 2: I literally say that if there's not gun to head,
Speaker 2: you have the wherewithal to make the decisions. It's to leave,
Speaker 2: to walk away, to stay, to put up with it,
Speaker 2: to tell your friends and not tell your friends.
Speaker 3: But I do think it could be harder with men
Speaker 3: and entertainment not giving men slack. But for example, if
Speaker 3: I'm on a diet, it's easy if I ain't got
Speaker 3: no crazy food in the house. Now when I'm going
Speaker 3: out to restaurants and choosing not to eat, it's like,
Speaker 3: right now we're not drinking. I'm not drinking because I'm
Speaker 3: trying to cut and lean out. Right, Oh why am
Speaker 3: I going to parties like it's.
Speaker 1: The met weekend? Like Monday we got I'm like, bro,
Speaker 1: this is tough.
Speaker 4: And it's tougher in the environment.
Speaker 1: Now if I'm home, I'm going breaking up at a
Speaker 1: certain time.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 3: So I can't imagine pussy and the best pussy, different
Speaker 3: colored pussies, different kinds, flavors and shit.
Speaker 4: It's crazy.
Speaker 2: I know when we talk we lean into like the
Speaker 2: entertainer of it all. But growing up in Orlando, if
Speaker 2: you're in small cities, there's men that have a plethora
Speaker 2: of options in even Middle America, small cities, Like, it's
Speaker 2: not just status, it's not just power.
Speaker 1: A lot of men have a lot of options a
Speaker 1: lot of times in their own listen.
Speaker 4: And it's cast in the hood.
Speaker 1: They got the full.
Speaker 2: There's there's options and they but they don't have they
Speaker 2: have options, they don't have discernment.
Speaker 1: That's the problem.
Speaker 4: Are they just the means are just different.
Speaker 3: I mean we're only as good as our options. That's
Speaker 3: the truth of it all. Like you can have a
Speaker 3: funny looking nigga, tell me he's good to his wife.
Speaker 3: I bet you are, Bet you are. You can have
Speaker 3: a wealthy man tell me that it's hard, and I
Speaker 3: bet it is. Like I really do believe It's our options.
Speaker 3: It's why certain people act certain ways. What we're like,
Speaker 3: we're a product of those options, having a roster, a
Speaker 3: plethoro of people falling at you. It's celebrity status too
Speaker 3: as well. Even if you're not attractive, people just want
Speaker 3: to fucking around you. We've all been around that person
Speaker 3: that's super famous and we're like, damn, you know what,
Speaker 3: I'm like, what the fuck?
Speaker 2: And especially right you're just like, I know I'm mean,
Speaker 2: but what the fuck? How does this person do it?
Speaker 2: I want to ask you before we get out of here.
Speaker 2: We haven't dove into the episode just yet, but being
Speaker 2: that you communicate, you've unlearned some things, you're open to
Speaker 2: learning more things within your relationship.
Speaker 1: What do your boundaries look like?
Speaker 2: We've been talking about boundaries, compromise versus sacrifice and all
Speaker 2: these things. Do you have a boundary that you've set
Speaker 2: forth that you won't cross or what does it look
Speaker 2: like to compromise with your partner?
Speaker 1: What does that kind of entail?
Speaker 4: I mean, we we we really communicate about everything everything.
Speaker 4: Like my wife is one of those women that'll say
Speaker 4: anything okay, Like she'll say it and then that oh yeah,
Speaker 4: I shouldn't said it like that, like she's she's that person. Absolutely,
Speaker 4: it's spice, is it? Because I'm non reactive?
Speaker 1: We see how long you take to answer question?
Speaker 4: You know how you like you have a your Wow,
Speaker 4: I just writing the big dogs and things like this,
Speaker 4: that's you. That's how So you know me. I'm just
Speaker 4: about you know, I'm just about respect and appreciation because
Speaker 4: I'm getting out in the field and I'm going to
Speaker 4: make sure that your feet don't touch the ground. Just
Speaker 4: respect and appreciate that, Okay, And that's it. I'm I'm
Speaker 4: when they say men are simple creatures, they're talking about
Speaker 4: me like food, food, water, power, you got you gotta
Speaker 4: give me the flowers, uh, food, sex, and and and
Speaker 4: and occasionally letting me know that I'm doing a good job.
Speaker 1: Oh affirmation okay? And how many years have you move
Speaker 1: with your wife?
Speaker 4: We have we're going on seven years of marriage this year.
Speaker 3: So when we sat down with Envy DJ Envy and
Speaker 3: his wife, Yeah, I asked, at what point do you
Speaker 3: just stop fighting and or what point does it just
Speaker 3: get easier? Do you feel that you've even reached it
Speaker 3: seven years that it's just seamless, that it's just easy
Speaker 3: that you know each other better, has that hit?
Speaker 4: Yeah, we know each other very well. But you know,
Speaker 4: spice just is what it is. It's just it's just
Speaker 4: organically spicy.
Speaker 1: Do you like a little toxic? Do you?
Speaker 4: And my wife is going to find some spice to
Speaker 4: throw to start the dash.
Speaker 1: Of at front?
Speaker 4: Is this liberal woman will figure out some spice. I'm
Speaker 4: a capricorn, Oh, Jane Janeuay first, damn? Yeah, yeah, I have.
Speaker 3: A holiday birthday too. I'm curious when is your birthday?
Speaker 3: You'd be like, like, is it annoying that everybody's come
Speaker 3: over on your birthday?
Speaker 1: Do you just celebrated? Is it New York?
Speaker 4: It annoyed me as a kid because they would group
Speaker 4: my birthday gifts for my Christmas gift. It's still got.
Speaker 2: You got your birthday gifts on Christmas.
Speaker 4: I don't do that to my son because because his
Speaker 4: birthday January first?
Speaker 1: What the wow?
Speaker 4: Yeah? Yeah, see she she had a she had a
Speaker 4: baby on my birthday. That's how she got the job.
Speaker 1: Was that her due date?
Speaker 4: That was her January first?
Speaker 1: That is so weird.
Speaker 4: And I said, I said, listen, I got you. Don't
Speaker 4: roll with me. Give me a baby as a gift
Speaker 4: you good, that's good for life's special. But yeah, so,
Speaker 4: I mean, but she's spisy. She can't help herself, like
Speaker 4: it's not like she can control it, like she's she's
Speaker 4: just swixy. And then don't let you know you know
Speaker 4: how how you know your hormones get when that time
Speaker 4: when the month comes and things just get thrown off,
Speaker 4: bounced a little bit. Oh when that when the spikes
Speaker 4: really pick up. I know what's going on. And then
Speaker 4: I have to give her so much great, I'm like, great.
Speaker 1: She looked like, let me see, she's gorgeous. Does she looks?
Speaker 1: Does she got the looks gorgeous? You know, when women
Speaker 1: are so fine, you be like, what's remember the guy
Speaker 1: that they were hot and crazy smell.
Speaker 4: From Saint Looisa.
Speaker 1: Fine? Oh I forgot a fun woman right there. Oh yes,
Speaker 1: I see, I could see the crazy. I see it.
Speaker 1: It's the eyes. It's the eyes.
Speaker 4: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: I love this picture of you too.
Speaker 4: That's from the front of my first video.
Speaker 1: Shoot, first video shoot.
Speaker 4: First video shoot.
Speaker 1: And he has on leather pants of course that's what
Speaker 1: we did, dated.
Speaker 4: White and a bandanna. I ain't got no bandanas, but
Speaker 4: I tell you right now I gotta, I gotta. I
Speaker 4: got a tank top and some leather pants in the closet.
Speaker 1: You know you got a tank?
Speaker 4: Stay ready to.
Speaker 1: Be Wait before we get out of here. How'd you
Speaker 1: get your name? Don't tell you the tank top?
Speaker 2: No, I wish I wish it was you said he
Speaker 2: got that tank in the pants.
Speaker 4: I wish.
Speaker 1: The Caribbean mom to fucking do Tank.
Speaker 3: I'm talking about Lord Jesus, are you here in the
Speaker 3: room with us? And she over looked, like kept the
Speaker 3: boris kujo?
Speaker 1: Tank? Yes, he is.
Speaker 4: I say that. My grandmother named me Tank. My cousins
Speaker 4: were making fun of me because I had a big
Speaker 4: hit in the big stomach.
Speaker 3: That is hilarious from Geekko hilarious.
Speaker 4: So my grandma was like, that's my tank. Boy, leaves
Speaker 4: him alone, Come here Tank, and just started calling because.
Speaker 1: Your head, that's hilarious.
Speaker 4: Dog.
Speaker 1: If y'all haven't uh. There are over a hundred episodes.
Speaker 2: Of R and B Money correct hundred in fifty there's
Speaker 2: a ton and guess you and Jay Valentine hosted. One
Speaker 2: of my favorite episodes was when y'all had Tearan He's
Speaker 2: a friend of mine. I love Torn so much, love
Speaker 2: that that episode. I was like, and he always drops
Speaker 2: gems and tells the best stories, which I think I
Speaker 2: love about R and B Money so much.
Speaker 1: You get the people so comfortable they do the stories.
Speaker 4: And they really they're really the drivers, you know what
Speaker 4: I mean, their conversations and their experiences and no, no, no no, they.
Speaker 2: Say with other people, it's not the same. No, no, no, no,
Speaker 2: they're not the drivers.
Speaker 4: Well we know why. You know why. You know why
Speaker 4: because we're of the cloth, right, you know what I mean,
Speaker 4: we we are, we are active, and so our sensibilities
Speaker 4: are just different. Yeah, you know, our conversation is just
Speaker 4: different because we do it. And so they I mean
Speaker 4: when they sit on our couch, you know, they they
Speaker 4: don't just feel comfortable, they feel appreciated. I mean they
Speaker 4: feel thata tell you like, we know what you're doing,
Speaker 4: what it is that you do, and how hard it
Speaker 4: is to do it. We love you and appreciate you.
Speaker 4: This is your space.
Speaker 1: Period, y'all. Check out R and B Money.
Speaker 2: Yeah, if you are coming to New York anytime, you
Speaker 2: must see Hell's.
Speaker 1: Kitchen, please tell us so highly on the stage.
Speaker 4: Yeah, so, y'all have a good.
Speaker 2: Amount of time our listeners New York, y'all, this is
Speaker 2: one of our biggest audiences. If you're traveling to New York,
Speaker 2: you must. I'm telling y'all now you must see Hell's Kitchen.
Speaker 2: And if you're a patron, I because it was so good.
Speaker 2: This isn't because Tank right here. I promise you it's
Speaker 2: not because I would have told them if it was
Speaker 2: mid it wasn't.
Speaker 1: I love it so much.
Speaker 2: I am giving away two pairs of tickets to go
Speaker 2: see Hell's Kitchen to our patrons. So go on over
Speaker 2: to our Patreon community. That's patreon dot com. Backslash horrible Decisions.
Speaker 2: And then also, I was talking to your manager before
Speaker 2: we get out of here. You have a new single
Speaker 2: out with Alisa.
Speaker 4: Yes, all gone shout out to a black Round record,
Speaker 4: shout with the Barry Hankerson. Okay, they called me with
Speaker 4: this idea, Sean Garrett, who actually helped, you know, reproduce
Speaker 4: it together. You just wanted the greatest and you know
Speaker 4: they had the idea to to to make me a
Speaker 4: part of it. Wow, And for me it was it
Speaker 4: was a no brainer. You know what I mean. Any
Speaker 4: opportunity I get to pay homage to a Leah to
Speaker 4: just keep her legacy and her memory.
Speaker 1: I can't wait.
Speaker 2: Well, I do want to tell you because I was
Speaker 2: looking for it today. It is exclusively on bk stream,
Speaker 2: so bokaystreamai dot com if you guys want to hear that.
Speaker 2: But I'm literally I was like, Okay, I guess I gotta.
Speaker 4: Go get on.
Speaker 2: Uh this app. I love any which way that they're adding.
Speaker 4: And what I want to add to that is that
Speaker 4: I think, you know, I think people, you know, when
Speaker 4: judging these things and critiquing these things, want people to
Speaker 4: have a little more grace because the song.
Speaker 1: Is a or no it's not.
Speaker 4: But we're dealing with you know, we're dealing with vocals
Speaker 4: that are decades and decades all. We're going to salvage
Speaker 4: a lot of things and put things together the best
Speaker 4: way we can to sound the best they can to
Speaker 4: honor her. You know, I'm not I'm not making a
Speaker 4: bunch of money to do this, you know what I mean.
Speaker 4: Blackground is not making a bunch of money to do this.
Speaker 4: But what we are doing is we're ensuring that Aliyah,
Speaker 4: who's important to I think all of us, that that
Speaker 4: that her spirit and that her legacy remains continues, it
Speaker 4: continues to live, and it's continued in conversation and we're
Speaker 4: and we're really just doing the best we can.
Speaker 1: People will appreciate that.
Speaker 4: People can it just can be too judgmental when they
Speaker 4: don't understand the process everything. But just know that you
Speaker 4: know we're doing our best.
Speaker 1: We're not going to judge this. You're just gonna judge
Speaker 1: that old clip year bro. Thank you so much, y'all.
Speaker 2: Make sure you go ahead and pre order our book,
Speaker 2: No holds bar to doing Manifesto of Sexual Exploration and Power.
Speaker 2: And again I'm giving out two pairs of the tickets
Speaker 2: two Hell's Kitchen on Broadway in New York City because
Speaker 2: you're gonna spend your money on nhbtour dot com.
Speaker 1: You will, you will NHB tour dot com. Make sure
Speaker 1: you check us out.
Speaker 2: And I think that's it, so y'all, thank you so
Speaker 2: much for tuning in to yet another episode of Decisions,
Speaker 2: Decisions Yane