1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:03,640 Speaker 1: Listeners. If you're in the market for the ultimate period 2 00:00:03,760 --> 00:00:08,639 Speaker 1: underwear that's also adorable for all sorts of body shapes 3 00:00:08,680 --> 00:00:10,680 Speaker 1: and sizes, then you need to head on over to 4 00:00:10,800 --> 00:00:14,480 Speaker 1: deer Kate's dot com. That's right, Dear Kate might ring 5 00:00:14,520 --> 00:00:16,759 Speaker 1: a bell because Kristen and I talked to their fierce 6 00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:21,120 Speaker 1: lady engineer founder Julie Siegel. She leads up an all 7 00:00:21,320 --> 00:00:25,079 Speaker 1: lady team that creates super cute and comfortable underwear just 8 00:00:25,360 --> 00:00:28,560 Speaker 1: for you. So head on over to deer kates dot 9 00:00:28,560 --> 00:00:31,160 Speaker 1: com and stuff Mom Never Told You listeners, you can 10 00:00:31,200 --> 00:00:35,160 Speaker 1: get off your first time order with the code mom 11 00:00:35,280 --> 00:00:38,760 Speaker 1: Stuff valid through the end of August, so head over 12 00:00:38,840 --> 00:00:45,800 Speaker 1: to dear kates dot com today. Welcome to stuff Mom 13 00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:53,600 Speaker 1: Never Told You from House top Works dot com. Hello, 14 00:00:53,640 --> 00:00:56,120 Speaker 1: and welcome to the podcast. I'm Christen and I'm Caroline 15 00:00:56,320 --> 00:00:59,240 Speaker 1: and Caroline. I don't know if in the history of 16 00:00:59,280 --> 00:01:02,800 Speaker 1: stuff Mom or told you we have gotten so many 17 00:01:02,880 --> 00:01:07,200 Speaker 1: requests for a particular episode at one time as we 18 00:01:07,280 --> 00:01:11,760 Speaker 1: did with dad Bods. Yeah, it's hilarious and I gotta say, like, 19 00:01:11,800 --> 00:01:14,840 Speaker 1: I love you people for turning to us. I like 20 00:01:14,920 --> 00:01:18,040 Speaker 1: picture our listeners, like looking at the internet and being 21 00:01:18,080 --> 00:01:20,560 Speaker 1: like uh, and then looking over at you and me 22 00:01:20,760 --> 00:01:24,280 Speaker 1: like can you can you explain this one? And then 23 00:01:24,319 --> 00:01:27,119 Speaker 1: also thinking why are they in my living room? Yeah? 24 00:01:27,240 --> 00:01:30,600 Speaker 1: And and that's just waving awkwardly eating some of your 25 00:01:30,959 --> 00:01:34,840 Speaker 1: chicken salads chicken salad and chips because we're working on 26 00:01:34,880 --> 00:01:39,320 Speaker 1: our own dad bods. Ps. Yeah, it is Father's Day 27 00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:42,679 Speaker 1: week here and stuff. Mom never told you land and 28 00:01:43,480 --> 00:01:47,920 Speaker 1: we couldn't not talk about the dad Bod because by now, 29 00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:50,640 Speaker 1: by the time this is coming to your ears, dad 30 00:01:50,640 --> 00:01:54,800 Speaker 1: Bod has probably died down. It is probably we we 31 00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:57,720 Speaker 1: probably reached peak dad bod on the internet. The Internet 32 00:01:57,840 --> 00:02:01,160 Speaker 1: wore itself out, like very quickly trying to figure out 33 00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:04,960 Speaker 1: what this dad bod thing is and means, and then it, 34 00:02:05,480 --> 00:02:08,840 Speaker 1: you know, kind of ebbed. So I have a feeling 35 00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:11,919 Speaker 1: that when this episode comes out, because when we're recording this, 36 00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:14,840 Speaker 1: Dad Body Craze is still in full force, but I 37 00:02:14,840 --> 00:02:19,440 Speaker 1: have a feeling that it will be not that will 38 00:02:19,480 --> 00:02:23,839 Speaker 1: be revisiting a topic because when we're recording this podcast, 39 00:02:24,760 --> 00:02:26,840 Speaker 1: just to be honest with you, to be transparent with 40 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:30,840 Speaker 1: the audience, Dad Body Craze is still at fever pitch. 41 00:02:31,480 --> 00:02:35,080 Speaker 1: So I wonder if by the time Father's Day rolls around, 42 00:02:35,240 --> 00:02:39,160 Speaker 1: I r l if it'll be old news. Yeah, I 43 00:02:39,160 --> 00:02:40,560 Speaker 1: mean the Internet is kind of like a dog with 44 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:44,560 Speaker 1: a bone with this dad bod thing, Uh, just shaking 45 00:02:44,560 --> 00:02:47,880 Speaker 1: it around. It's really excited about the dad body, both 46 00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:53,520 Speaker 1: positively excited and negatively excited about dad body. And uh, 47 00:02:53,600 --> 00:02:57,240 Speaker 1: it's so funny. I mean there's so many like amazing 48 00:02:58,160 --> 00:03:02,160 Speaker 1: little pop cultural layers to this one. And not only 49 00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:04,360 Speaker 1: in terms of what is dad body and what is 50 00:03:04,440 --> 00:03:07,680 Speaker 1: liking it mean? But also what does it say about 51 00:03:07,680 --> 00:03:09,720 Speaker 1: the people who like it or who hate it? Or 52 00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:12,640 Speaker 1: what does it say about women? And there's just so 53 00:03:12,919 --> 00:03:17,959 Speaker 1: many things with dad body. Yeah, And that is exemplified 54 00:03:18,040 --> 00:03:21,840 Speaker 1: in a Facebook request that we got from listener Gregory 55 00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:25,760 Speaker 1: asking us to do this podcast because he says, well, 56 00:03:25,800 --> 00:03:28,960 Speaker 1: I recognize the blatant unfairness that women are pressured to 57 00:03:29,040 --> 00:03:31,359 Speaker 1: lose that baby fat and hide their stretch marks after 58 00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:34,760 Speaker 1: a child. I can't help but think isn't any form 59 00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:39,960 Speaker 1: of body positivity a good thing? And so that's another 60 00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:42,200 Speaker 1: that's a question to ask of, Well, is dad bob 61 00:03:42,440 --> 00:03:46,400 Speaker 1: just is it a form of body positivity or is it, 62 00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:51,440 Speaker 1: as some people say, just a different kind of sexism 63 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:56,119 Speaker 1: or privilege or privilege or um, just frat boys having 64 00:03:56,120 --> 00:03:59,720 Speaker 1: a good time. Because that's kind of a hilarious thing 65 00:03:59,760 --> 00:04:05,760 Speaker 1: about dad bot, is that it It started with frat boys. Yeah, 66 00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:10,080 Speaker 1: it's it's Clemson University student Mackenzie Pearson who really sort 67 00:04:10,120 --> 00:04:14,200 Speaker 1: of it all exploded around her and around a column 68 00:04:14,240 --> 00:04:18,280 Speaker 1: she wrote for The Odyssey, Uh talking about why women 69 00:04:18,560 --> 00:04:21,920 Speaker 1: or or girls love the dad bod. But she was 70 00:04:21,960 --> 00:04:24,920 Speaker 1: hardly the first to talk about it. The first two 71 00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:28,680 Speaker 1: people on that college website to talk about it were 72 00:04:29,240 --> 00:04:33,080 Speaker 1: frat guys who were excited that the softer look was 73 00:04:34,120 --> 00:04:38,359 Speaker 1: in Yeah, I mean and and Pearson talks herself about 74 00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:42,360 Speaker 1: how the dad bot is nothing new among kids these days. 75 00:04:42,440 --> 00:04:45,320 Speaker 1: People have been talking about the dad bod for a while, 76 00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:48,960 Speaker 1: and and it wasn't surprising to find out that this 77 00:04:49,320 --> 00:04:52,440 Speaker 1: has roots in fraternity culture because it seems like a 78 00:04:52,520 --> 00:04:57,440 Speaker 1: real world reflection of the rise of stoner bro culture 79 00:04:57,640 --> 00:05:01,719 Speaker 1: with Jason Siegel work a holic, Seth Rogan, all of 80 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:06,360 Speaker 1: those guys who are beloved not only in spite of 81 00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:10,360 Speaker 1: what because of their lovable bodies, but not zac Efron. 82 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:13,720 Speaker 1: In that one movie with Seth Rogan, that's true where 83 00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:16,839 Speaker 1: he does not look like a dad bod. No, he 84 00:05:16,920 --> 00:05:19,520 Speaker 1: looks like a zac Efron body. Yeah, zac Efron does 85 00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:22,960 Speaker 1: not have a dad bod. He has a rad bod. 86 00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:25,880 Speaker 1: Some might say, well, but okay, so we need to 87 00:05:25,960 --> 00:05:29,679 Speaker 1: at least tell the people what dad bought is supposed 88 00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:32,440 Speaker 1: to be, because for those of you who have managed 89 00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:37,680 Speaker 1: to avoid the online tumult of the dad bod craze. 90 00:05:38,320 --> 00:05:42,240 Speaker 1: Pearson defines it as, uh, I go to the gym occasionally, 91 00:05:42,480 --> 00:05:44,799 Speaker 1: but I also drink heavily on the weekends and enjoy 92 00:05:44,880 --> 00:05:47,640 Speaker 1: eating eight slices of pizza at a time. She says, 93 00:05:47,720 --> 00:05:50,599 Speaker 1: it's not an overweight guy, but it isn't one with 94 00:05:50,680 --> 00:05:54,800 Speaker 1: washboard abs either, So it's just it's just a person. Really, 95 00:05:55,120 --> 00:05:58,239 Speaker 1: it's a person. But I think that last part about 96 00:05:58,320 --> 00:06:01,360 Speaker 1: it's not an overweight guy, but it's not one with 97 00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:04,600 Speaker 1: washboard abs is important to keep in mind because, as 98 00:06:04,640 --> 00:06:08,680 Speaker 1: Pierson notes, Dad Bob still works out, he still exercises. 99 00:06:09,520 --> 00:06:12,440 Speaker 1: It's just that when he's not exercising, he's not exactly 100 00:06:13,279 --> 00:06:16,640 Speaker 1: eating super great or like watching he's not drinking Michaelope 101 00:06:16,720 --> 00:06:21,000 Speaker 1: Ultra for crying out loud, he's doing pbr keag stands 102 00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:27,640 Speaker 1: possibly um, so this explodes. Pearson gets all this attention 103 00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:32,360 Speaker 1: and Amanda has over its Slate interviews her to find out. Okay, 104 00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:37,880 Speaker 1: Mackenzie Pierson enlighten us old thirty year olds about dad body, 105 00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:41,320 Speaker 1: and she notes that a friend pointed out to her 106 00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:45,200 Speaker 1: on campus, and I really do enjoy her description of it, 107 00:06:45,360 --> 00:06:48,159 Speaker 1: of how her friend and she would be walking around 108 00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:50,160 Speaker 1: and her friend would whisper, that's a dad bought. That's 109 00:06:50,200 --> 00:06:51,920 Speaker 1: a dad bought. That's a dad body. And I want 110 00:06:51,920 --> 00:06:53,920 Speaker 1: to know, I want to meet this friend, like okay, 111 00:06:53,920 --> 00:06:55,960 Speaker 1: Like I don't need to hear anymore from Mackenzie, Like 112 00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:58,080 Speaker 1: we need to We need to find this friend and 113 00:06:58,120 --> 00:07:00,719 Speaker 1: be like, girl, what is the deal? Okay, you know 114 00:07:00,760 --> 00:07:03,640 Speaker 1: who that friend is, by the way, not you know 115 00:07:03,760 --> 00:07:06,320 Speaker 1: to call myself a thirty year old? Uh did you 116 00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:09,640 Speaker 1: ever watch the o C? Because her friend is definitely 117 00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:12,720 Speaker 1: low And from the three fans of the o C 118 00:07:12,880 --> 00:07:15,320 Speaker 1: who are listening, I hope you know what I'm talking about, 119 00:07:15,600 --> 00:07:18,080 Speaker 1: because her friend strikes me. And I know this is 120 00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:20,720 Speaker 1: a complete tangent, but her friend strikes me as the 121 00:07:20,760 --> 00:07:23,240 Speaker 1: type of girl who knows like everything, and she kind 122 00:07:23,240 --> 00:07:25,440 Speaker 1: of controls all of the social levers. And she already 123 00:07:25,440 --> 00:07:27,720 Speaker 1: has the lingo before everybody else has the lingo, and 124 00:07:27,760 --> 00:07:31,320 Speaker 1: she categorizes people in these certain kinds. Could this since 125 00:07:31,360 --> 00:07:33,040 Speaker 1: I've never seen me a c could this also be 126 00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:36,800 Speaker 1: Shoshanna from Girls or or not? Even she's a little 127 00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:40,320 Speaker 1: more self possessed in Shoshanna. Okay, she's not quite as 128 00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:44,640 Speaker 1: she is as pop culturally aware and invested as Showshanna, 129 00:07:45,120 --> 00:07:50,600 Speaker 1: but is has a little more autonomy and social authority. Okay, 130 00:07:50,640 --> 00:07:53,760 Speaker 1: But McKenzie Pears and I really wish you were listening 131 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:56,480 Speaker 1: to this right now so that you could let us 132 00:07:56,520 --> 00:08:00,640 Speaker 1: know whether or not my very detailed fantasy friend is 133 00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:04,559 Speaker 1: correct at all. Well, yeah, she. Peerson also tells hes 134 00:08:05,080 --> 00:08:09,720 Speaker 1: that she figures that about half of modern day nineteen 135 00:08:09,800 --> 00:08:13,520 Speaker 1: year olds would have already been familiar with the concept 136 00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:17,080 Speaker 1: of the dad body before her column went totally viral. Yeah. 137 00:08:17,120 --> 00:08:19,200 Speaker 1: I mean, this whole dad bod thing has to be 138 00:08:19,400 --> 00:08:24,200 Speaker 1: laughable to anyone under twenty two, because it's an example 139 00:08:24,360 --> 00:08:29,320 Speaker 1: of the olds catching onto something and being like, oh, 140 00:08:29,560 --> 00:08:32,920 Speaker 1: let's say analyza, yeah, and that's what happened. I mean, 141 00:08:33,440 --> 00:08:36,520 Speaker 1: it is people our age and up who like latched 142 00:08:36,559 --> 00:08:38,120 Speaker 1: onto it, and we're like, we're going to pull this 143 00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:41,680 Speaker 1: apart and examine this what does it say about society? 144 00:08:41,880 --> 00:08:46,640 Speaker 1: And she cites Hollywood examples of dad bods like Chris 145 00:08:46,720 --> 00:08:50,840 Speaker 1: Pratt in his Parks and Wreck physique, not in his 146 00:08:51,040 --> 00:08:55,199 Speaker 1: Guardians of the Galaxy super Ripped physique John Mayer, which 147 00:08:55,320 --> 00:08:59,280 Speaker 1: is hilarious just imagining him with a dad bob singing 148 00:08:59,280 --> 00:09:02,400 Speaker 1: your body as a one. And then also John Hammond, 149 00:09:02,400 --> 00:09:04,960 Speaker 1: she said, quote he has a great one. And the 150 00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:10,679 Speaker 1: example of John Hammon was like, well, dog gone dadd Okay, 151 00:09:10,720 --> 00:09:13,640 Speaker 1: I guess, I guess I am attracted to a dad. 152 00:09:14,760 --> 00:09:20,080 Speaker 1: Maybe there's a small spectrum, yeah, a small dad bod spectrum. Um. 153 00:09:20,280 --> 00:09:24,280 Speaker 1: But so has asked her a very important question, and 154 00:09:24,320 --> 00:09:28,599 Speaker 1: that is, so, is there a female equivalent? What is 155 00:09:28,640 --> 00:09:31,920 Speaker 1: the female equivalent to the dad bod? And she's like, well, 156 00:09:31,960 --> 00:09:34,960 Speaker 1: there's not exactly a word for it, um, but I 157 00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:38,920 Speaker 1: would say that it's probably a girl who's thick with 158 00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:43,360 Speaker 1: meat on her bones. But she points out that dad 159 00:09:43,400 --> 00:09:47,960 Speaker 1: body is cool. It's a normal, healthy guy. He's still desirable. 160 00:09:48,040 --> 00:09:50,200 Speaker 1: It doesn't matter that maybe he should work out more, 161 00:09:50,280 --> 00:09:53,320 Speaker 1: or maybe he should eat less pizza. It's still a cool, 162 00:09:53,600 --> 00:09:57,880 Speaker 1: desirable Like top of the social heap dude. And so 163 00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:01,880 Speaker 1: in reading that, my conclusion is that, oh, well, okay, 164 00:10:02,200 --> 00:10:08,560 Speaker 1: there is no pop cultural equivalent, whether it's in media, advertising, whatever, 165 00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:11,760 Speaker 1: to the dad bod for women, because there it's not 166 00:10:11,840 --> 00:10:14,520 Speaker 1: like there's a lady Jason Siegel. Yes, we have like 167 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:18,760 Speaker 1: a Melissa McCarthy or whoever, but she's not a leading 168 00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:21,880 Speaker 1: lady where Jason Siegel still gets to be the desirable 169 00:10:21,960 --> 00:10:26,800 Speaker 1: leading man. Yeah. And it was also notable that her 170 00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:32,800 Speaker 1: description of Thick was a correction of Hess suggesting that 171 00:10:32,880 --> 00:10:36,400 Speaker 1: the female equivalent would be quote unquote curvy, and Pearence 172 00:10:36,480 --> 00:10:40,480 Speaker 1: was like, no, no, no, not curby so much as thick. 173 00:10:40,760 --> 00:10:44,600 Speaker 1: And yeah, I think because they're of that lack of 174 00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:51,079 Speaker 1: readily accessible female equivalence, it ruffle a lot of feathers, 175 00:10:51,080 --> 00:10:54,440 Speaker 1: this very idea of it. And and before I forget Caroline, 176 00:10:54,440 --> 00:10:57,719 Speaker 1: I also want to note something about this interview with 177 00:10:57,760 --> 00:11:01,080 Speaker 1: Amanda Hess, in which I'm just talking about the categorization 178 00:11:01,280 --> 00:11:04,320 Speaker 1: of men's types of bodies which women are familiar with. 179 00:11:04,360 --> 00:11:07,160 Speaker 1: We all know whether we're pear shaped or we're boxy, 180 00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:09,400 Speaker 1: or you know, we have a boyish frame or what. 181 00:11:09,920 --> 00:11:17,640 Speaker 1: Um has notes that this categorization of male physiques before 182 00:11:17,720 --> 00:11:20,200 Speaker 1: up until now has primarily been something that you see 183 00:11:20,240 --> 00:11:23,120 Speaker 1: more in gay culture, where you have bears, otters and 184 00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:27,199 Speaker 1: twinks and perhaps the dad bod is you know, seems 185 00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:30,680 Speaker 1: so revolutionary because oh, this is now, you know, entering 186 00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:36,080 Speaker 1: into very very straight, very white at this point, because 187 00:11:36,160 --> 00:11:38,959 Speaker 1: let's let's be honest, all of the dad bought examples 188 00:11:39,040 --> 00:11:42,840 Speaker 1: that I've seen anywhere all white dudes. Um, now it's 189 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:46,240 Speaker 1: entering into this space. Yeah, because I mean pretty much, 190 00:11:46,760 --> 00:11:50,480 Speaker 1: when talking about men's bodies, you either have like the 191 00:11:50,640 --> 00:11:54,280 Speaker 1: ripped model on the cover of Men's Fitness, or you 192 00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:58,560 Speaker 1: have just like a dude. Yeah, just like a guy body. 193 00:11:58,720 --> 00:12:03,160 Speaker 1: It's a guy bodd that is masculine. Well, as we noted, 194 00:12:03,360 --> 00:12:08,680 Speaker 1: Pearson's column that took the world by storm inadvertently was 195 00:12:08,679 --> 00:12:13,400 Speaker 1: focused on why girls love the dad bods. So what 196 00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:16,199 Speaker 1: does she say are the reasons why why are at 197 00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:20,440 Speaker 1: least college age girls particularly drawn to frat boys with 198 00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:24,880 Speaker 1: a little bit of a paunch. Well, partly, she says 199 00:12:25,080 --> 00:12:28,040 Speaker 1: the squish. A little bit of squish makes for better cuddling, 200 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:31,480 Speaker 1: gives you something to hold onto. It also can signal 201 00:12:31,720 --> 00:12:34,280 Speaker 1: that the guy will be up for eating whatever whenever. 202 00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:37,120 Speaker 1: If you want to go to taco Tuesday or or 203 00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:40,080 Speaker 1: thirsty Thursday, he'll be up for it. He's not busy 204 00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:44,840 Speaker 1: juicing or whatever. Uh. And it also, she says, lets 205 00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:46,959 Speaker 1: us get used to the dad bod will be looking 206 00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:50,680 Speaker 1: at twenty years from now, to which I say, honey, Um, 207 00:12:50,840 --> 00:12:54,000 Speaker 1: nobody looks at forty the way they did at twenty, 208 00:12:54,600 --> 00:12:58,719 Speaker 1: most humans. And so if the human looks one way 209 00:12:58,720 --> 00:13:01,959 Speaker 1: at twenty, like, no, you're not looking at what you're 210 00:13:01,960 --> 00:13:04,520 Speaker 1: going to be looking at when he's forty. Well, I 211 00:13:04,559 --> 00:13:06,800 Speaker 1: think it is also important that we keep in mind that, 212 00:13:06,880 --> 00:13:10,320 Speaker 1: as Pearson herself has said, the article was meant to 213 00:13:10,360 --> 00:13:14,520 Speaker 1: be read in a lighthearted tone. Yeah, and of course, 214 00:13:14,559 --> 00:13:17,360 Speaker 1: I mean that's where I uh, I just have to 215 00:13:17,400 --> 00:13:21,800 Speaker 1: roll my eyes because I feel like every year we 216 00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:25,960 Speaker 1: get some sort of like silly college sex column or 217 00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:30,079 Speaker 1: advice column or whatever the political column, right, that's meant 218 00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:33,400 Speaker 1: to be satire or lighthearted or whatever, and it's just 219 00:13:33,520 --> 00:13:38,760 Speaker 1: so poorly executed. Because it's college. You're still figuring it out, 220 00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:41,920 Speaker 1: you haven't maybe nailed down your your authorly voice yet. 221 00:13:42,080 --> 00:13:45,199 Speaker 1: But it apparently made absolutely no difference to every single 222 00:13:45,240 --> 00:13:48,199 Speaker 1: American media outlet because they have latched on and not 223 00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:50,920 Speaker 1: let go of dad body, like the dog with the 224 00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:54,240 Speaker 1: bone Like you said, yeah, well, but so there were 225 00:13:54,240 --> 00:13:56,720 Speaker 1: only things like oh we get to cuddle and snuggle 226 00:13:56,760 --> 00:14:01,360 Speaker 1: with with his squish. But mostly the reason that girls 227 00:14:01,360 --> 00:14:04,720 Speaker 1: supposedly love the dad body, according to Pearson, is that 228 00:14:04,840 --> 00:14:07,440 Speaker 1: being next to a dad bod makes us feel better 229 00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:10,120 Speaker 1: about ourselves. She says, we don't want a guy that 230 00:14:10,200 --> 00:14:13,440 Speaker 1: makes us feel insecure about our body. We're insecure enough 231 00:14:13,480 --> 00:14:16,160 Speaker 1: as it is. We don't need a perfectly sculpted guy 232 00:14:16,280 --> 00:14:20,360 Speaker 1: standing next to us to make us feel worse. She 233 00:14:20,440 --> 00:14:22,520 Speaker 1: goes on to say, we want to look skinny, and 234 00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:24,640 Speaker 1: the bigger the guy, the smaller we feel, and the 235 00:14:24,680 --> 00:14:30,160 Speaker 1: better we look next to you in a picture um which, 236 00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:33,360 Speaker 1: of course that also ruffled some feathers as well. This 237 00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:38,640 Speaker 1: idea that women are specifically attracted to something that will 238 00:14:38,760 --> 00:14:42,760 Speaker 1: soothe their insecurities, and she directly responds to that saying 239 00:14:42,760 --> 00:14:45,960 Speaker 1: that was totally not the intention of the article. I 240 00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:48,280 Speaker 1: think of myself as a very secure woman. I'm very 241 00:14:48,280 --> 00:14:50,120 Speaker 1: proud of my body and who I am. But it 242 00:14:50,240 --> 00:14:52,240 Speaker 1: is something that my friends have talked about, and like 243 00:14:52,320 --> 00:14:54,920 Speaker 1: any other girl, I do have insecurities. I don't want 244 00:14:54,920 --> 00:14:57,760 Speaker 1: a guy to tell me what I can or can't eat, 245 00:14:58,280 --> 00:15:02,400 Speaker 1: and being with someone who is at a more intensive 246 00:15:02,560 --> 00:15:06,920 Speaker 1: level of fitness and nutrition and body maintenance than you are. 247 00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:11,160 Speaker 1: Just generally speaking, I don't care what your biological sex, gender, 248 00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:14,840 Speaker 1: sexual orientation is like. If there is that mismatch, it 249 00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:22,080 Speaker 1: can be a drag absolutely um so so yeah, so 250 00:15:22,120 --> 00:15:23,640 Speaker 1: there is a kernel of truth in that no one 251 00:15:23,680 --> 00:15:25,600 Speaker 1: wants to be told what they can and can't eat. 252 00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:29,920 Speaker 1: I'm looking at you care I know, I mean flapping 253 00:15:30,040 --> 00:15:32,440 Speaker 1: Sammy's out of my hands to eating that banana. So 254 00:15:32,480 --> 00:15:36,960 Speaker 1: what happens then when Pearson writes this intended to be 255 00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:41,440 Speaker 1: tongue in cheek column about the dad body and makes 256 00:15:41,520 --> 00:15:46,960 Speaker 1: these statements, and then the adult bloggo sphere goes nuts 257 00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:51,280 Speaker 1: and goes absolutely nuts. Yeah, I mean you you basically 258 00:15:51,320 --> 00:15:54,240 Speaker 1: have these cheers. I'm sure if leagues of men could 259 00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:56,560 Speaker 1: lift McKenzie Pearson up on their shoulders and carry her 260 00:15:56,600 --> 00:15:58,720 Speaker 1: through the street, synatick or tape parade, they would have. 261 00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:02,520 Speaker 1: I mean, you've got at MSN reporting on the quote 262 00:16:02,560 --> 00:16:07,520 Speaker 1: latest trend for the male physique plays. They write the 263 00:16:07,560 --> 00:16:10,720 Speaker 1: concept was an immediate hit with nicely squishing men everywhere 264 00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:12,880 Speaker 1: who took to Instagram without delay to show off their 265 00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:17,360 Speaker 1: less than toned torsos and chunky arms. And that did happen. 266 00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:20,000 Speaker 1: There were you know, there was definitely a social media 267 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:24,560 Speaker 1: effect of guys being like, finally someone appreciates my belly. 268 00:16:24,800 --> 00:16:27,920 Speaker 1: Well yeah, I just think it's funny that, like the 269 00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:30,560 Speaker 1: dad bought in Pearson's column, the dad bought is being 270 00:16:30,600 --> 00:16:34,040 Speaker 1: written as written about as a way to prop up 271 00:16:34,640 --> 00:16:38,200 Speaker 1: women who are insecure, but people are still rejoicing as 272 00:16:38,240 --> 00:16:40,520 Speaker 1: if it's permission to be soft. But win. Have men 273 00:16:40,640 --> 00:16:43,200 Speaker 1: not had permission to be soft? No? But it's it's 274 00:16:43,240 --> 00:16:45,680 Speaker 1: also the thing too have. Like the idea is that 275 00:16:45,760 --> 00:16:49,840 Speaker 1: it sues women and women's insecurities, and yet the idea 276 00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:54,000 Speaker 1: of it has only southed been men's insecurities. Yeah. Yeah, 277 00:16:54,080 --> 00:16:56,440 Speaker 1: so it kind of backfires a little bit. Well yeah, 278 00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:58,760 Speaker 1: And then of course you have Peter Holly over at 279 00:16:58,760 --> 00:17:04,199 Speaker 1: the Washington Post in mid May who proudly declares, I 280 00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:06,840 Speaker 1: have a dad bot and here's why women love it. 281 00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:10,400 Speaker 1: Yet again we have an example of quote unquote satire 282 00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:17,159 Speaker 1: being not not perfectly executed. Yeah, so he relays his 283 00:17:17,160 --> 00:17:20,720 Speaker 1: whole experience of not being as successful with women when 284 00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:23,240 Speaker 1: he was exercising all the time and really in shape. 285 00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:25,199 Speaker 1: He was like, yeah, you know, they might grab my 286 00:17:25,240 --> 00:17:28,040 Speaker 1: bice up flirtatiously at the bar, but they weren't going 287 00:17:28,040 --> 00:17:31,480 Speaker 1: to be my lady friend, my permanent lady friend. Um. 288 00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:34,360 Speaker 1: And he says it wasn't until he softened up, basically 289 00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:39,000 Speaker 1: that women were less intimidated by his masculine physique and 290 00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:42,160 Speaker 1: that he actually scored a girlfriend. Well. An important note 291 00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:44,720 Speaker 1: too that he says that when he was working out 292 00:17:44,760 --> 00:17:50,000 Speaker 1: all the time that the muscles were masking attempting to 293 00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:56,000 Speaker 1: mask at least a lack of confidence. And so it's like, well, 294 00:17:56,920 --> 00:17:59,920 Speaker 1: which is really at work here? Um? He then back 295 00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:03,320 Speaker 1: step and says, you know what, just generally speaking, this 296 00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:08,080 Speaker 1: is evolutionary psychology at its best. Because we all work 297 00:18:08,080 --> 00:18:11,560 Speaker 1: in offices now. Women are not in mortal danger from lions, 298 00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:16,400 Speaker 1: so there's no need to be attracted by by big, brutish, 299 00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:20,159 Speaker 1: super strong dudes. And and you could take that a 300 00:18:20,160 --> 00:18:22,480 Speaker 1: few steps further and say that when it comes to 301 00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:26,320 Speaker 1: one night stands hook up situations, women yes, are going 302 00:18:26,359 --> 00:18:28,920 Speaker 1: to opt for the super chiseled zach eron. But when 303 00:18:28,960 --> 00:18:31,080 Speaker 1: it comes to settling down. We want a guy who 304 00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:33,080 Speaker 1: looks like he's not going to be too tempted to stray, 305 00:18:33,160 --> 00:18:38,480 Speaker 1: so we will marry Seth Rogan. Well, you know, he 306 00:18:38,520 --> 00:18:41,000 Speaker 1: does say I'm fully aware of the double standard. Women 307 00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:45,280 Speaker 1: are held too much higher and more unfortunate standard. Um 308 00:18:45,320 --> 00:18:48,960 Speaker 1: and he himself, he experienced his own fallout for sure 309 00:18:49,200 --> 00:18:52,360 Speaker 1: from his article from his column it's not just mckinthy 310 00:18:52,359 --> 00:18:54,440 Speaker 1: Pearson and then the couple of guys that clemps in 311 00:18:54,520 --> 00:18:56,880 Speaker 1: before her who wrote about Dad Bod who are experiencing 312 00:18:56,880 --> 00:19:01,439 Speaker 1: a little bit of blowback. Holly was shocked, shocked, I 313 00:19:01,560 --> 00:19:04,919 Speaker 1: tell you, by the response to the photos of himself 314 00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:08,600 Speaker 1: that accompanied his article. He said, there are people that 315 00:19:08,760 --> 00:19:12,480 Speaker 1: find an average male body offensive. It's a really threatening 316 00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:15,560 Speaker 1: and uncomfortable feeling to which I have nothing to say 317 00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:19,240 Speaker 1: except blank stair, blank stare, blank stare, cricket chirping noise 318 00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:23,760 Speaker 1: because people are oh hello, welcome to the universe where 319 00:19:23,800 --> 00:19:28,320 Speaker 1: people are very uncomfortable with the average female body as well. Yeah, 320 00:19:28,359 --> 00:19:31,520 Speaker 1: I mean he just walked, walked a few feet in 321 00:19:31,680 --> 00:19:35,720 Speaker 1: our heels. God, Hi, Hi, my name's Kristen. I recycled 322 00:19:35,720 --> 00:19:39,439 Speaker 1: gender stereotypes as often as possible, but we do have 323 00:19:39,520 --> 00:19:43,920 Speaker 1: to talk about this bigger issue of body image, and 324 00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:46,560 Speaker 1: we're gonna do that when we come right back from 325 00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:55,000 Speaker 1: a quick break. So in the first half of the show, 326 00:19:55,000 --> 00:20:00,639 Speaker 1: we thoroughly established what dad body is, Mackenzie Pearson's column 327 00:20:00,840 --> 00:20:05,320 Speaker 1: that outlined why girls are supposedly attracted to it, all 328 00:20:05,320 --> 00:20:08,480 Speaker 1: of the fallout, etcetera, etcetera. So let's get a little 329 00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:10,679 Speaker 1: serious for a moment, take it back a few steps 330 00:20:10,720 --> 00:20:14,800 Speaker 1: and talk about male physique and male body image, because 331 00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:17,120 Speaker 1: the fact of the matter is, and what a lot 332 00:20:17,119 --> 00:20:22,480 Speaker 1: of guys have taken comfort in the article acknowledging is 333 00:20:22,520 --> 00:20:28,200 Speaker 1: that men have body images as well. They do. Yeah, 334 00:20:28,320 --> 00:20:31,399 Speaker 1: So that's why it's weird that this whole dad bod 335 00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:34,480 Speaker 1: thing has been written about as a trend because like, 336 00:20:34,480 --> 00:20:37,960 Speaker 1: like plenty of women have said in terms of quote 337 00:20:38,040 --> 00:20:43,720 Speaker 1: unquote trends about female bodies or feminine bodies. Uh, can 338 00:20:43,800 --> 00:20:46,040 Speaker 1: bodies be a trend? I mean, I don't, I don't know. 339 00:20:46,080 --> 00:20:50,560 Speaker 1: But so the CDC says that of men have been 340 00:20:50,600 --> 00:20:54,440 Speaker 1: overweight since the nineteen sixties and a third are now obese. 341 00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:58,160 Speaker 1: In other words, the dad bought or what we're now 342 00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:00,480 Speaker 1: calling the dad body and the people who eight or 343 00:21:00,520 --> 00:21:04,359 Speaker 1: mary or have kids with it are definitely nothing new. 344 00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:08,600 Speaker 1: But like Kristen said, dudes face their own body image 345 00:21:08,640 --> 00:21:13,480 Speaker 1: issues also absolutely and MSN writes the positive reaction to 346 00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:17,200 Speaker 1: this new found appreciation for curvy men has reminded us 347 00:21:17,200 --> 00:21:21,360 Speaker 1: all that guys to face and at times unrealistic social 348 00:21:21,359 --> 00:21:24,879 Speaker 1: pressure to be buff and trim. And this led me 349 00:21:25,040 --> 00:21:28,520 Speaker 1: to a two thousand and twelve CNN trend piece on 350 00:21:28,720 --> 00:21:32,240 Speaker 1: male body image, which was really fascinating to go back 351 00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:34,639 Speaker 1: and read in the context of all this dad body 352 00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:38,880 Speaker 1: male body image talk going on, because it focused on 353 00:21:39,080 --> 00:21:43,320 Speaker 1: how the standards for not only male physique but also 354 00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:48,879 Speaker 1: male grooming had escalated in recent years. But at the 355 00:21:48,920 --> 00:21:53,240 Speaker 1: same time they interviewed uh like a head editor at 356 00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:57,919 Speaker 1: Men's Health magazine who said that the ideal, though, is 357 00:21:57,960 --> 00:22:00,480 Speaker 1: still and she was speaking more to grooming, but I 358 00:22:00,520 --> 00:22:05,000 Speaker 1: think this also relates to dad body. The ideal is 359 00:22:05,040 --> 00:22:09,280 Speaker 1: still to look good but not too good. Do not 360 00:22:09,400 --> 00:22:12,600 Speaker 1: look like you're trying. Like if everything is so like 361 00:22:12,920 --> 00:22:15,760 Speaker 1: crisp and in the right place and you don't have 362 00:22:16,119 --> 00:22:19,359 Speaker 1: you know, an inch of fat on you, then you're 363 00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:25,439 Speaker 1: gonna look vain to a feminine extent is the subtext interesting, 364 00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:28,240 Speaker 1: which does signal I mean even even the fact that 365 00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:31,080 Speaker 1: it is there's this concern of I need to look 366 00:22:31,119 --> 00:22:33,160 Speaker 1: a certain way, but not too much of a certain way. 367 00:22:33,200 --> 00:22:37,760 Speaker 1: There seems to be this fine line perhaps that men 368 00:22:37,960 --> 00:22:42,640 Speaker 1: and boys increasingly are very conscious of what they see 369 00:22:43,160 --> 00:22:45,080 Speaker 1: in the mirror, and I think that that that shouldn't 370 00:22:45,119 --> 00:22:49,800 Speaker 1: be dismissed. Yeah. So, I mean, the the positive reactions 371 00:22:49,840 --> 00:22:53,520 Speaker 1: to the dad bod stuff, it shouldn't be surprising. I mean, 372 00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:55,399 Speaker 1: there was this article in the Atlantic which was not 373 00:22:55,560 --> 00:23:00,159 Speaker 1: dad bod related but instead male body image related. Um. 374 00:23:00,280 --> 00:23:03,200 Speaker 1: But they cited a January study in the Journal of 375 00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:06,960 Speaker 1: the American Medical Association at Pediatrics that found that nearly 376 00:23:07,080 --> 00:23:10,920 Speaker 1: eighteen percent of boys are highly concerned about their weight 377 00:23:10,960 --> 00:23:13,640 Speaker 1: and physique, most of them wanted to be more muscular, 378 00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:16,520 Speaker 1: and that these boys were more likely to be depressed 379 00:23:16,560 --> 00:23:19,280 Speaker 1: and to engage in high risk behaviors like binge, drinking, 380 00:23:19,280 --> 00:23:22,680 Speaker 1: and drug use. They also cited a twelve study that 381 00:23:22,760 --> 00:23:24,880 Speaker 1: found that more than a third of middle and high 382 00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:28,919 Speaker 1: school aged boys drink protein shakes and powders to get bigger. 383 00:23:28,960 --> 00:23:33,560 Speaker 1: So obviously body dissatisfaction is an equal opportunity plague basically yeah. 384 00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:37,000 Speaker 1: And we did an entire podcast a while back on 385 00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:42,640 Speaker 1: men and anorexia and how treatment for that is can 386 00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:44,840 Speaker 1: be really hard to come by because it's just assumed 387 00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:47,639 Speaker 1: that eating disorders are a girl thing, when in fact 388 00:23:48,119 --> 00:23:51,640 Speaker 1: those statistics are on the rise. So the National Eating 389 00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:55,200 Speaker 1: Disorders Association reported in two thousand six, over the past 390 00:23:55,280 --> 00:23:58,520 Speaker 1: thirty years, the rate of men being dissatisfied with their 391 00:23:58,520 --> 00:24:03,919 Speaker 1: bodies jumped from fIF to forty percent, which is comparable 392 00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:07,719 Speaker 1: to rates found among women. And if we look just 393 00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:11,400 Speaker 1: at college guys, which is the prime dad body demographic 394 00:24:11,440 --> 00:24:14,919 Speaker 1: in its original sense of the word, in two thousand eleven, 395 00:24:15,640 --> 00:24:19,320 Speaker 1: NITA reported the rate of eating disorders among college guys 396 00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:23,840 Speaker 1: range from four to yeah. But the thing is, it's 397 00:24:23,840 --> 00:24:28,399 Speaker 1: still more acceptable culturally, I would say, for guys to 398 00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:32,040 Speaker 1: be bigger and flabbier than it is for women. I mean, 399 00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:34,359 Speaker 1: you've got the whole ugly guy hot wife trip that 400 00:24:34,400 --> 00:24:36,040 Speaker 1: you and I have talked about on the podcast before. 401 00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:37,840 Speaker 1: I mean, look at that show King of Queens, which 402 00:24:37,880 --> 00:24:39,920 Speaker 1: I mean has long been canceled by now, but it's 403 00:24:39,920 --> 00:24:42,280 Speaker 1: the same thing. The big guy with the gut in 404 00:24:42,320 --> 00:24:45,160 Speaker 1: his ups uniform, and then the hot wife with all 405 00:24:45,240 --> 00:24:47,280 Speaker 1: of the makeup and the heels and all of that stuff. 406 00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:51,360 Speaker 1: And so while publicizing a love for dad bods might 407 00:24:51,480 --> 00:24:56,880 Speaker 1: make some guys breathe a sigh of relief, this decision 408 00:24:56,960 --> 00:24:59,639 Speaker 1: this like, hooray, we can opt out of this body 409 00:24:59,640 --> 00:25:03,560 Speaker 1: image hamster wheel, It's still one that's open. Two guys. 410 00:25:03,600 --> 00:25:05,880 Speaker 1: It seems like women can't really do the same and 411 00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:09,560 Speaker 1: then be celebrated for it, and then be celebrated well, 412 00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:11,919 Speaker 1: other women will celebrate other women. In terms of all 413 00:25:11,960 --> 00:25:14,720 Speaker 1: the body positivity posts you see all over the place 414 00:25:14,760 --> 00:25:19,080 Speaker 1: on social media. Ladies love supporting ladies appreciating their bodies. 415 00:25:19,200 --> 00:25:21,199 Speaker 1: Most of the time women do it. Be kind to 416 00:25:21,240 --> 00:25:25,040 Speaker 1: other women, please, But it seems like, especially in this 417 00:25:25,680 --> 00:25:29,680 Speaker 1: more heteronormative context, that it's when you get the praise 418 00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:33,680 Speaker 1: from the opposite sex who says you are still desirable 419 00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:37,160 Speaker 1: to a lot of us just the way you are, 420 00:25:37,520 --> 00:25:41,639 Speaker 1: that then it becomes a valid choice. So that is 421 00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:47,199 Speaker 1: probably why Mackenzie Pearson's dad bought article, as opposed to 422 00:25:47,320 --> 00:25:49,840 Speaker 1: the previous dad bought articles that have been written on 423 00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:53,639 Speaker 1: the Odyssey by dudes, went so viral because here is 424 00:25:53,680 --> 00:25:58,520 Speaker 1: a straight girl saying the other straight girls find these 425 00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:04,720 Speaker 1: kinds of straight guys super attractive. Yeah, and then msn 426 00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:10,040 Speaker 1: uh In, in a wistful bit of philosophizing, says, but 427 00:26:10,119 --> 00:26:13,600 Speaker 1: where will this trend take us? Could the mom bod 428 00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:18,560 Speaker 1: be the lusted after shape for time will tell? And 429 00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:21,439 Speaker 1: I've got got my middle fingers in the air for 430 00:26:21,600 --> 00:26:26,440 Speaker 1: msn Because no, no, no, there's no such thing as 431 00:26:26,840 --> 00:26:30,679 Speaker 1: the lusted after mom body in this context, in the 432 00:26:30,760 --> 00:26:32,600 Speaker 1: eat all the pizza, drink all the beer like the 433 00:26:32,640 --> 00:26:36,960 Speaker 1: frat boys context, the mom bod is literally only the 434 00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:40,480 Speaker 1: bod that produces children. In terms of the way we 435 00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:42,120 Speaker 1: talk about it and think about it and the way 436 00:26:42,119 --> 00:26:44,119 Speaker 1: that it's acceptable for a woman to be bigger. Well, 437 00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:48,320 Speaker 1: especially if we're operating from this idea that dad bod 438 00:26:48,359 --> 00:26:56,040 Speaker 1: serves to soothe women's insecurities romantic, physical, sexual, and otherwise, 439 00:26:57,000 --> 00:26:59,480 Speaker 1: then a mom body is not going to operate in 440 00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:03,840 Speaker 1: the same way, because at no point in our cultural 441 00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:10,080 Speaker 1: history has a larger, fleshier woman, a woman with just 442 00:27:10,160 --> 00:27:16,040 Speaker 1: a body that isn't like a super banging body, been 443 00:27:16,600 --> 00:27:22,200 Speaker 1: seen as a way to sooth any kind of male insecurity. Yeah, 444 00:27:22,520 --> 00:27:24,520 Speaker 1: you know, I mean, and I'm just talking like cultural 445 00:27:24,600 --> 00:27:29,000 Speaker 1: values here and Lyndy West, who has spoken openly for 446 00:27:29,040 --> 00:27:33,080 Speaker 1: a long time about being a fat woman, fat acceptance, 447 00:27:33,880 --> 00:27:37,200 Speaker 1: body image in general, had a lot to say about 448 00:27:37,240 --> 00:27:40,760 Speaker 1: this on Twitter, and not surprisingly, yeah, she says that 449 00:27:40,840 --> 00:27:42,760 Speaker 1: you know, it's not that the dad bot isn't cool. 450 00:27:43,080 --> 00:27:46,359 Speaker 1: All bods are cool. But can you imagine the abuse 451 00:27:46,440 --> 00:27:49,680 Speaker 1: women would take if we declared Momba the hot new bod. 452 00:27:50,200 --> 00:27:52,399 Speaker 1: It wouldn't be a bunch of cute listicles, is what 453 00:27:52,440 --> 00:27:57,120 Speaker 1: I'm saying. Honestly, dad bot is pure male privilege. And actually, 454 00:27:57,200 --> 00:28:01,159 Speaker 1: she says, we do have dialogue around Momba. It's called 455 00:28:01,359 --> 00:28:04,960 Speaker 1: fixing your post baby body. And this is where we 456 00:28:05,040 --> 00:28:10,199 Speaker 1: get into the mom shell trend, because of course with 457 00:28:10,280 --> 00:28:13,280 Speaker 1: dad bod, everyone starts asking about, well, what's what's mom bod? 458 00:28:13,320 --> 00:28:15,840 Speaker 1: Where's the mom bod trend? When is that going to happen? Well, 459 00:28:15,840 --> 00:28:18,560 Speaker 1: guess what it did happen, and it's called the mom 460 00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:21,480 Speaker 1: shell And it's what we talked about in our Mother's 461 00:28:21,560 --> 00:28:25,600 Speaker 1: Day episodes on the celebrity Baby Bump Watch and then 462 00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:29,959 Speaker 1: the celebrity focused baby weight Loss Race. This whole idea 463 00:28:30,119 --> 00:28:33,920 Speaker 1: of get your pre pregnancy body back as quickly as possible, 464 00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:38,160 Speaker 1: which psc it doesn't really exist, like your body is 465 00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:41,120 Speaker 1: your body and you're not it never you never lost it. 466 00:28:41,120 --> 00:28:44,000 Speaker 1: It's it's just there and you had a child. It's 467 00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:46,080 Speaker 1: the idea of the milf. But the thing is, the 468 00:28:46,160 --> 00:28:51,440 Speaker 1: dad bod mainly applies to college guys who aren't actually 469 00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:55,280 Speaker 1: literally fathers for the most part. I mean, plenty of 470 00:28:55,280 --> 00:28:58,400 Speaker 1: of guys who are dad's or or dad age have 471 00:28:58,600 --> 00:29:01,160 Speaker 1: definitely appropriated it and been like, yes, this is me 472 00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:05,000 Speaker 1: and I'm gonna revel in my dad body. But anytime 473 00:29:05,040 --> 00:29:07,960 Speaker 1: you're talking about you're trying to equate a momba and 474 00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:11,880 Speaker 1: a dad bod. The mom bad has earned her tiger stripes, 475 00:29:11,920 --> 00:29:14,240 Speaker 1: as Mackenzie Pearson write in a follow up article, But 476 00:29:14,360 --> 00:29:18,280 Speaker 1: having children right and and what Mackenzie is talking about 477 00:29:18,280 --> 00:29:20,360 Speaker 1: in terms of, you know, a woman who has had 478 00:29:20,400 --> 00:29:24,480 Speaker 1: a child having stretch marks or perhaps scars from acessarian section, like, yeah, 479 00:29:24,520 --> 00:29:27,440 Speaker 1: that is in a very real sense of the word 480 00:29:27,640 --> 00:29:31,840 Speaker 1: a mom bad. But culturally, the mom bads that are 481 00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:36,680 Speaker 1: most praised, like the mom shells, are the celebrities who 482 00:29:36,840 --> 00:29:41,440 Speaker 1: look like they never were pregnant. They're fitter than you 483 00:29:41,520 --> 00:29:44,479 Speaker 1: and I will ever be and you brought up such 484 00:29:44,480 --> 00:29:47,400 Speaker 1: an important point about the fact that dad body relates 485 00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:52,840 Speaker 1: nothing whatsoever to having a child at some point, whereas 486 00:29:53,720 --> 00:29:58,400 Speaker 1: the mom bad as being something super sexy and desirable 487 00:29:58,560 --> 00:30:02,920 Speaker 1: among st college dudes. It's never gonna be a thing 488 00:30:03,320 --> 00:30:08,840 Speaker 1: because of how much people really get panicky over the 489 00:30:08,880 --> 00:30:13,520 Speaker 1: idea of sexualizing women once motherhood happens. I mean, we 490 00:30:13,600 --> 00:30:19,680 Speaker 1: talked about this with Demi Moore's Andy Leibowitz pregnancy photo 491 00:30:19,760 --> 00:30:22,280 Speaker 1: where she's naked and she's holding her breasts, and it 492 00:30:22,320 --> 00:30:24,880 Speaker 1: was very shocking to a lot of people because here 493 00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:28,440 Speaker 1: is a woman who is full term pregnant, and yet 494 00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:30,760 Speaker 1: she's posing in a sexy way, and we don't know 495 00:30:30,800 --> 00:30:33,440 Speaker 1: what to do with that. That's very much a conflict. 496 00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:36,960 Speaker 1: And when it comes to Mrs Robinson's and milts, they're 497 00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:41,800 Speaker 1: desirable because they're hot despite being a mom, not because 498 00:30:41,840 --> 00:30:45,120 Speaker 1: their mom, not because they look like moms. And yeah, 499 00:30:45,160 --> 00:30:47,800 Speaker 1: so there's never an equivalent. A dad bod belongs to 500 00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:51,640 Speaker 1: a twenty year old college guy, but a mom bod 501 00:30:51,640 --> 00:30:54,680 Speaker 1: belongs to a thirty five year old woman who has 502 00:30:54,680 --> 00:30:57,840 Speaker 1: had children. You're not gonna say that a twenty year 503 00:30:57,880 --> 00:30:59,800 Speaker 1: old girl at college and a sorority has a mom 504 00:30:59,800 --> 00:31:04,680 Speaker 1: by because likely she would be offended. Honestly, Oh yeah, yeah. 505 00:31:04,760 --> 00:31:08,200 Speaker 1: It's like, listen, I wear mom jeans and I like 506 00:31:08,280 --> 00:31:10,520 Speaker 1: to cut off a mom jeans in the summertime. I 507 00:31:10,520 --> 00:31:12,680 Speaker 1: can wear some mom jeans, and I've gotten made fun 508 00:31:12,720 --> 00:31:16,440 Speaker 1: of for wearing mom jeans by extension like a mom bad. 509 00:31:16,560 --> 00:31:18,800 Speaker 1: Like I can get over people mocking my mom jeans, 510 00:31:19,040 --> 00:31:21,720 Speaker 1: but my mom bad that would be feel like a 511 00:31:21,800 --> 00:31:24,760 Speaker 1: little bit more of a slight in a way. But 512 00:31:24,880 --> 00:31:27,280 Speaker 1: that says so much though. The very fact that would 513 00:31:27,280 --> 00:31:31,239 Speaker 1: be insulting says so much about how women's bodies are 514 00:31:31,280 --> 00:31:36,160 Speaker 1: treated as they age and what we think of when 515 00:31:36,200 --> 00:31:39,800 Speaker 1: we think of a mom bad. But at the same time, though, Caroline, 516 00:31:39,880 --> 00:31:44,040 Speaker 1: what do we think about guys grown men, not just 517 00:31:44,120 --> 00:31:46,400 Speaker 1: college guys, but more so middle aged guys who are 518 00:31:46,440 --> 00:31:52,320 Speaker 1: like legit dads with like actual literal dad bodies, who 519 00:31:52,920 --> 00:31:56,719 Speaker 1: really have found that some validation for their physique with 520 00:31:56,760 --> 00:31:58,840 Speaker 1: this whole dad body thing. The guys who have said, 521 00:31:58,880 --> 00:32:01,880 Speaker 1: you know what, I have in a little embarrassed about 522 00:32:01,880 --> 00:32:05,360 Speaker 1: my spare tire, but this really gave me a boost 523 00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:07,520 Speaker 1: that I need because that was something that we heard 524 00:32:07,560 --> 00:32:11,520 Speaker 1: from for instance from listener Gregory, who posted about this 525 00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:13,360 Speaker 1: on our Facebook page, where he was saying, you know, 526 00:32:13,560 --> 00:32:18,680 Speaker 1: like I I kind of like it in a way. 527 00:32:18,720 --> 00:32:24,080 Speaker 1: I kind of like that this is that this exists now. Well, 528 00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:26,360 Speaker 1: I mean I think, you know, like you pointed out 529 00:32:26,360 --> 00:32:30,920 Speaker 1: earlier with how great lady the lady body positivity is. 530 00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:33,720 Speaker 1: I mean, I think any body positivity is great. Any 531 00:32:33,760 --> 00:32:36,640 Speaker 1: support for anyone about their body is great. You know, 532 00:32:36,920 --> 00:32:40,240 Speaker 1: I love your body, be happy in it. Um. But 533 00:32:40,280 --> 00:32:43,480 Speaker 1: I mean, I think it's kind of always been okay 534 00:32:43,520 --> 00:32:45,800 Speaker 1: for guys to be whatever shape. I mean, if we're 535 00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:48,480 Speaker 1: talking pop culturally, it's always been okay for guys to 536 00:32:48,680 --> 00:32:54,880 Speaker 1: look however, except for morbidly obese in pop culture. Um, 537 00:32:54,920 --> 00:32:57,760 Speaker 1: and that's something that hasn't been true for women. But 538 00:32:57,800 --> 00:33:01,440 Speaker 1: playing Devil's advocate for a moment, though, does that sentiment 539 00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:03,200 Speaker 1: of well, you know what, it's always been fine for 540 00:33:03,200 --> 00:33:05,200 Speaker 1: you to have a body, you know, and you don't 541 00:33:05,200 --> 00:33:08,920 Speaker 1: get it? Does that do a disservice so to men, 542 00:33:09,440 --> 00:33:12,600 Speaker 1: like by turning them into a monolith as we never 543 00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:15,240 Speaker 1: appreciate as women and saying you, guys, this is the 544 00:33:15,240 --> 00:33:17,400 Speaker 1: way it is for you. Just accept the cultural value 545 00:33:17,400 --> 00:33:20,000 Speaker 1: that's given to you. We're not gonna acknowledge that you 546 00:33:20,080 --> 00:33:23,880 Speaker 1: individually have body images on your own, and that when 547 00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:27,040 Speaker 1: you look in the mirror, and that when you, you know, 548 00:33:27,200 --> 00:33:31,000 Speaker 1: want to have sex with someone, that certain feelings process 549 00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:35,120 Speaker 1: through you in individual kinds of ways as well. Oh yeah, 550 00:33:35,160 --> 00:33:38,000 Speaker 1: I mean, I I absolutely I can totally see that, 551 00:33:38,040 --> 00:33:41,080 Speaker 1: And I can totally see how reading a column by 552 00:33:41,200 --> 00:33:44,520 Speaker 1: an attractive nineteen year old girl telling you that you're 553 00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:49,040 Speaker 1: desirable could be a nice morale boost. So it seems 554 00:33:49,080 --> 00:33:54,640 Speaker 1: like the problem isn't dad bod. The frustration, rather is 555 00:33:54,760 --> 00:34:02,080 Speaker 1: that male bodies just generally are consistently validated. They're kind 556 00:34:02,080 --> 00:34:04,720 Speaker 1: of they're kind of always being given given the cookies, 557 00:34:05,160 --> 00:34:08,239 Speaker 1: and women are being told to run that cookie off, 558 00:34:09,160 --> 00:34:12,479 Speaker 1: but not too much, yeah, because otherwise you're vain. Yeah, 559 00:34:12,480 --> 00:34:15,600 Speaker 1: otherwise you're too vain. But you can't, Yeah, you can't 560 00:34:15,640 --> 00:34:19,000 Speaker 1: be too too thin to the point of skinny, but 561 00:34:19,080 --> 00:34:21,480 Speaker 1: to not thin to the point of to the point 562 00:34:21,520 --> 00:34:25,680 Speaker 1: of thick, as as Mackenzie Pearson would put it, So 563 00:34:25,760 --> 00:34:28,359 Speaker 1: interesting too, I want to hear from listeners about the 564 00:34:28,520 --> 00:34:32,759 Speaker 1: curby versus thick distinction. That said a lot to me too, 565 00:34:32,840 --> 00:34:36,200 Speaker 1: That a lot to me also because I feel like 566 00:34:36,920 --> 00:34:43,120 Speaker 1: Curvy is at least endowed um with some positive connotations, 567 00:34:43,280 --> 00:34:46,279 Speaker 1: you know, like Curvy can still be like, oh well, 568 00:34:46,280 --> 00:34:49,640 Speaker 1: she's like a Marilyn Monroe. But Thick almost carries with 569 00:34:49,719 --> 00:34:52,120 Speaker 1: it like and I'm not saying this, I'm not saying 570 00:34:52,120 --> 00:34:55,120 Speaker 1: thick is bad, but I'm saying thick almost carries with 571 00:34:55,160 --> 00:34:58,279 Speaker 1: it more negative connotations. And so there you have the 572 00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:00,759 Speaker 1: writer of the Dad body column not even she can't 573 00:35:00,840 --> 00:35:03,839 Speaker 1: she there is no there is no parallel wh I. 574 00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:06,920 Speaker 1: But when it comes to Thick, though, I will say anecdotally, 575 00:35:07,440 --> 00:35:13,200 Speaker 1: I completely disagree. When I hear thick, I hear a 576 00:35:13,280 --> 00:35:17,640 Speaker 1: big butt and thick thighs. I think of Beyonce and 577 00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:22,520 Speaker 1: Kim Kardashian and the entire like big Butts episode that 578 00:35:22,600 --> 00:35:25,080 Speaker 1: we did a while back. That's what I hear when 579 00:35:25,080 --> 00:35:28,680 Speaker 1: I hear yeah, but I I can't yeah, And I 580 00:35:28,719 --> 00:35:30,719 Speaker 1: don't disagree with you, which is not a mom bod 581 00:35:30,719 --> 00:35:32,640 Speaker 1: though in my mind now, And I mean, I don't 582 00:35:32,640 --> 00:35:34,800 Speaker 1: disagree with you in terms of thinking of like Beyonce, 583 00:35:34,920 --> 00:35:37,600 Speaker 1: who's a great body. But I don't know that that's 584 00:35:37,640 --> 00:35:41,319 Speaker 1: what Mackenzie Pearson meant. Yeah. Yeah, So Mackenzie Pearson. If 585 00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:45,960 Speaker 1: you're listening, just call us up at Hive Dad Bods. 586 00:35:46,760 --> 00:35:48,560 Speaker 1: We'll be on the horn waiting to hear from you. 587 00:35:48,920 --> 00:35:51,560 Speaker 1: But listeners, we really want to hear from you about 588 00:35:51,560 --> 00:35:55,040 Speaker 1: this because we already have heard so many requests, so 589 00:35:55,080 --> 00:35:57,920 Speaker 1: now we want to hear your thoughts and feedback and 590 00:35:58,000 --> 00:36:03,000 Speaker 1: responses to the dad body and owners of dad Bods. 591 00:36:03,120 --> 00:36:06,120 Speaker 1: We also want to hear from you. Mom's Stabbitt House 592 00:36:06,120 --> 00:36:08,600 Speaker 1: Stuffwork dot Com is our email address. You can also 593 00:36:08,640 --> 00:36:11,640 Speaker 1: tweet us at mom Stuff Podcast and messages on Facebook, 594 00:36:12,120 --> 00:36:13,960 Speaker 1: and we've got a couple of messages to share with you. 595 00:36:14,440 --> 00:36:21,359 Speaker 1: All right now, Okay, well, I have a letter here 596 00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:23,720 Speaker 1: from Courtney. It's sort of a two parter. It's half 597 00:36:23,760 --> 00:36:27,960 Speaker 1: carpentry and half women peeing. So let's just dive into this. 598 00:36:28,080 --> 00:36:33,080 Speaker 1: Perfect yeah, perfect, um, all things sminty, She says. First 599 00:36:33,080 --> 00:36:35,240 Speaker 1: of all, i want to thank you for the podcast 600 00:36:35,280 --> 00:36:38,920 Speaker 1: about carpentry. I've recently been looking into new education for 601 00:36:39,040 --> 00:36:42,000 Speaker 1: new career options, as I feel like the education I 602 00:36:42,040 --> 00:36:44,000 Speaker 1: have has not set me up for any careers that 603 00:36:44,080 --> 00:36:47,640 Speaker 1: I'm really interested in. I've never really considered carpentry until 604 00:36:47,640 --> 00:36:50,520 Speaker 1: your podcast, but I enjoy making things and am now 605 00:36:50,640 --> 00:36:53,920 Speaker 1: seriously looking into it. I just ordered hammer Head by 606 00:36:54,000 --> 00:36:56,279 Speaker 1: Nina McLaughlin and it should be on the way to 607 00:36:56,360 --> 00:36:59,200 Speaker 1: my house soon. I can't wait to read more of 608 00:36:59,200 --> 00:37:02,640 Speaker 1: her story. I also looked up college carpentry programs in 609 00:37:02,640 --> 00:37:05,080 Speaker 1: my area and there's an interesting program starting at a 610 00:37:05,120 --> 00:37:09,880 Speaker 1: local college in Waterloo, Ontario for women only. It's government funded, 611 00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:12,959 Speaker 1: so it's free to eligible women those who were either 612 00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:16,880 Speaker 1: unemployed or underemployed. Seems like it could potentially be a 613 00:37:16,920 --> 00:37:20,279 Speaker 1: great way to get more women in the field. I 614 00:37:20,440 --> 00:37:23,520 Speaker 1: also wanted to comment on the letter you read recently 615 00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:26,880 Speaker 1: in response to your hunting episode, where the writer talked 616 00:37:26,880 --> 00:37:30,960 Speaker 1: about female urination devices. I think that you should definitely 617 00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:34,960 Speaker 1: do a podcast, YouTube video, or something on the subject. 618 00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:38,040 Speaker 1: The writer mentioned the cold, but for me, the issue 619 00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:40,680 Speaker 1: was always privacy. I did field work for a few 620 00:37:40,719 --> 00:37:43,560 Speaker 1: seasons and we were often without porta potties and working 621 00:37:43,560 --> 00:37:46,200 Speaker 1: in an open farm field. The guys would just walk 622 00:37:46,239 --> 00:37:48,360 Speaker 1: a few feet to the side and turn their backs, 623 00:37:48,360 --> 00:37:50,200 Speaker 1: but for girls it was a lot harder to find 624 00:37:50,200 --> 00:37:53,080 Speaker 1: the privacy we needed. We would usually find a bathroom 625 00:37:53,080 --> 00:37:55,239 Speaker 1: in town during lunch, but sometimes you need to pee 626 00:37:55,280 --> 00:37:58,759 Speaker 1: more often it was a constant conversation topic among the 627 00:37:58,760 --> 00:38:01,840 Speaker 1: women and almost all ways on our minds, is ordering 628 00:38:01,840 --> 00:38:04,359 Speaker 1: this large coffee going to be worth needing to take 629 00:38:04,400 --> 00:38:07,160 Speaker 1: a twenty minute walk to the closest tree or bush? 630 00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:09,400 Speaker 1: And that's probably a bit of health and safety issue 631 00:38:09,400 --> 00:38:11,800 Speaker 1: on a hot day when we shouldn't be limiting water 632 00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:15,560 Speaker 1: intake to avoid having to pay too Often, female urination 633 00:38:15,600 --> 00:38:19,719 Speaker 1: devices or fuds were occasionally mentioned in jokes as kind 634 00:38:19,760 --> 00:38:22,560 Speaker 1: of a weird, ridiculous thing anyone should be embarrassed to 635 00:38:22,560 --> 00:38:25,719 Speaker 1: even consider using. But if they can solve something that 636 00:38:25,840 --> 00:38:28,439 Speaker 1: is more than a minor inconvenience and often a very 637 00:38:28,480 --> 00:38:31,239 Speaker 1: real problem for women, maybe we should learn to love 638 00:38:31,280 --> 00:38:34,320 Speaker 1: and embrace the fud. And I say, corny, yeah, we 639 00:38:34,360 --> 00:38:37,799 Speaker 1: absolutely should embrace the fud, And we we talked a 640 00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:40,640 Speaker 1: little bit about it in our potty Politics episode a 641 00:38:40,640 --> 00:38:43,239 Speaker 1: while back. We did mention things like the pmate when 642 00:38:43,280 --> 00:38:44,880 Speaker 1: you go to music festivals and you have to go 643 00:38:44,920 --> 00:38:48,080 Speaker 1: into a disgusting porta potty or or like in your case, 644 00:38:48,120 --> 00:38:50,359 Speaker 1: there's just kind of nowhere to go and you don't 645 00:38:50,400 --> 00:38:53,400 Speaker 1: want to pop a squat and expose yourself to the elements, 646 00:38:53,440 --> 00:38:58,040 Speaker 1: slash your coworkers. Uh so, so maybe maybe it's time 647 00:38:58,080 --> 00:39:01,560 Speaker 1: to focus more on it. Listeners, let us know should 648 00:39:01,600 --> 00:39:05,320 Speaker 1: we do a FUD episode, And if you have FUD 649 00:39:05,320 --> 00:39:07,839 Speaker 1: stories to share with us so we can read, uh, 650 00:39:08,040 --> 00:39:11,080 Speaker 1: please send them our way. Mom stuff at house stuffworks 651 00:39:11,080 --> 00:39:15,480 Speaker 1: dot com. I've got a letter here from Evelyn, subject 652 00:39:15,560 --> 00:39:19,080 Speaker 1: line from a first time trimester first timer, and this 653 00:39:19,160 --> 00:39:22,160 Speaker 1: is relevant to our dad body conversation, so she says, 654 00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:24,080 Speaker 1: I wanted to write in with some thoughts on how 655 00:39:24,120 --> 00:39:26,520 Speaker 1: it feels to be pregnant and to think about the 656 00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:29,600 Speaker 1: pregnant body and popular culture. First of all, the first 657 00:39:29,600 --> 00:39:33,440 Speaker 1: trimester is probably the least mediatized trimester, first because it's 658 00:39:33,440 --> 00:39:35,840 Speaker 1: the time when a woman is the least visibly pregnant, 659 00:39:35,880 --> 00:39:38,400 Speaker 1: and second because most women are advised to keep the 660 00:39:38,400 --> 00:39:42,080 Speaker 1: pregnancy secret until the second trimester. This is because the 661 00:39:42,120 --> 00:39:45,080 Speaker 1: incidence of miscarriage is much higher than the first trimester, 662 00:39:45,400 --> 00:39:48,560 Speaker 1: and most people don't want to publicize that. In other words, 663 00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:51,120 Speaker 1: I'm part of the least represented group of pregnant women 664 00:39:51,239 --> 00:39:54,440 Speaker 1: in the media. While women with baby bombs get unwanted 665 00:39:54,440 --> 00:39:57,959 Speaker 1: attention from strangers on the street, I probably only seem 666 00:39:57,960 --> 00:40:01,400 Speaker 1: like a bloated pimpley, really tired looking woman commuting on 667 00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:04,799 Speaker 1: public transportation. Every day, I blend in or maybe even 668 00:40:04,840 --> 00:40:07,359 Speaker 1: become a little more visible as I gained baby weight 669 00:40:07,360 --> 00:40:10,360 Speaker 1: without a visible baby. Logically, I know that I'm gaining 670 00:40:10,360 --> 00:40:12,040 Speaker 1: the right amount of weight, and that a lot of 671 00:40:12,040 --> 00:40:14,680 Speaker 1: it is my body building up stores of liquids and 672 00:40:14,719 --> 00:40:17,560 Speaker 1: fats for the rest of my pregnancy. However, it's hard 673 00:40:17,640 --> 00:40:19,920 Speaker 1: not to just feel like I'm being judged unfairly for 674 00:40:20,040 --> 00:40:23,479 Speaker 1: my extra girth and physical weakness. I can't tell work 675 00:40:23,520 --> 00:40:25,640 Speaker 1: friends the real reason why I'm missing out on certain 676 00:40:25,680 --> 00:40:28,160 Speaker 1: outings that I'm plain exhausted and I don't think I 677 00:40:28,160 --> 00:40:30,000 Speaker 1: can stomach the food, so I have to tell them 678 00:40:30,040 --> 00:40:32,879 Speaker 1: I have some other commitment or illness. I can't very 679 00:40:32,880 --> 00:40:35,360 Speaker 1: well take up a pregnant woman's seat on the bus 680 00:40:35,360 --> 00:40:38,520 Speaker 1: without people thinking I'm rude. And finally, I have the 681 00:40:38,640 --> 00:40:41,759 Speaker 1: uncomfortable suspicion that all of my acquaintances secretly think I'm 682 00:40:41,800 --> 00:40:44,279 Speaker 1: suddenly getting fat for no reason and are judging me 683 00:40:44,360 --> 00:40:46,840 Speaker 1: for it. As a person who's never been the object 684 00:40:46,840 --> 00:40:50,799 Speaker 1: of fat shaming, I'm becoming acutely aware of it. So 685 00:40:50,920 --> 00:40:53,399 Speaker 1: actually I'm looking at the second trimester with a certain 686 00:40:53,440 --> 00:40:56,480 Speaker 1: amount of hope. Because there is a real media presence 687 00:40:56,520 --> 00:40:58,680 Speaker 1: of women with baby bumps, I feel like I'll have 688 00:40:58,760 --> 00:41:01,040 Speaker 1: more of an instant idea nity when I'm walking around 689 00:41:01,080 --> 00:41:03,440 Speaker 1: in public. I might actually get offered a seat on 690 00:41:03,520 --> 00:41:06,200 Speaker 1: a crowded bus. I won't need to spend mental energy 691 00:41:06,200 --> 00:41:08,960 Speaker 1: making up lies to get out of drinking or tiring activities. 692 00:41:09,719 --> 00:41:12,680 Speaker 1: I have a ready made excuse if I don't look 693 00:41:12,680 --> 00:41:16,319 Speaker 1: put together, energetic and fit. In conclusion, I feel like 694 00:41:16,360 --> 00:41:21,960 Speaker 1: the difficulties of the first trimester morning sickness, exhaustion, food aversions, bloating, anxiety, 695 00:41:22,040 --> 00:41:24,759 Speaker 1: and adjusting to a pregnant body are really avoided in 696 00:41:24,800 --> 00:41:28,080 Speaker 1: the media. Morning sickness might get some airplay, but it's 697 00:41:28,120 --> 00:41:31,319 Speaker 1: hardly glamorous, whereas there seems to be a trend of 698 00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:34,520 Speaker 1: aestheticizing the baby bump that I look forward to. Rightly 699 00:41:34,760 --> 00:41:38,480 Speaker 1: or wrongly, I don't know yet. Well, Eveyonen, thanks so 700 00:41:38,600 --> 00:41:41,759 Speaker 1: much for sharing your experiences and good clock with the 701 00:41:41,800 --> 00:41:45,080 Speaker 1: rest of your pregnancy, and we want to hear from 702 00:41:45,360 --> 00:41:48,319 Speaker 1: you as well. Listeners. Mom stuff at house stuffworks dot 703 00:41:48,360 --> 00:41:50,200 Speaker 1: com is our email address and for links to all 704 00:41:50,200 --> 00:41:52,920 Speaker 1: of our social media as well as all of our blogs, videos, 705 00:41:52,960 --> 00:41:55,759 Speaker 1: and podcasts, including this one. So you can read all 706 00:41:55,800 --> 00:41:59,480 Speaker 1: of our Dad Bob sources, head on over to stuff 707 00:41:59,520 --> 00:42:06,000 Speaker 1: Mom Never Told You dot com for more on this 708 00:42:06,160 --> 00:42:08,879 Speaker 1: and thousands of other topics. Isn't how Stuff Works dot 709 00:42:08,880 --> 00:42:17,000 Speaker 1: com