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Speaker 1: All right, I'll get you coming to you live from Philly.

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Speaker 1: It's the number one rated Tolly and Tony Fools Go

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Speaker 1: show Yo as always, Paulie Fools go here with Tony

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Speaker 1: Fools Going and Tony a huge and very important show today.

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Speaker 1: You know, as you all know, if you're following the

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Speaker 1: NBA closely, which is almost always a total waste of time,

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Speaker 1: it is and you know this year has been no exception.

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Speaker 1: That's the truth is right now, there is straight up

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Speaker 1: fear running through the entire NBA as the entire sports

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Speaker 1: world looks at what could be a thunder Facers NBA

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Speaker 1: Finals horrible. You know, there's real fear out there that

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Speaker 1: the ratings will not just be bad for an NBA Finals,

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Speaker 1: but any telecast in the history of television, Isn't that right, Tony.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, the experts is saying this is gonna be the

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Speaker 2: worst televised matchup, not since Spurs versus Nets, but since

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Speaker 2: Joni Loves Chachi.

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Speaker 3: Wow. Truly dire.

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Speaker 1: And that's why today we are doing a very special

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Speaker 1: report Fatal Finals, the thunder Paces disaster. Fatal Finals, the

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Speaker 1: thunder Paces Disaster. Now We're not just gonna bitch and

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Speaker 1: moan like all the others. You know, we're gonna give

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Speaker 1: you actual solutions, absolutely, as we always do to save

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Speaker 1: this terrible series. But before we get into that day,

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Speaker 1: remember you hit like you hit subscribe your comment and

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Speaker 1: your rate and review too on Apple Podcasts.

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Speaker 2: Right, don all of it, you know, because if you

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Speaker 2: don't do that, then the algorithm might force you to

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Speaker 2: watch much worse content like highlights of the Paces Thunder

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Speaker 2: NBA Finals, and you certainly don't want that.

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Speaker 1: Nobody wants that anyways, so go ahead and avoid that.

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Speaker 1: And anyway, on the subject of great content, let's get

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Speaker 1: right into our special report.

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Speaker 3: Fatal Finals, the Thunder Paces disaster.

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Speaker 1: Okay, we begin our special report the concern about these

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Speaker 1: TV ratings. You know, as we said, there's a general

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Speaker 1: acceptance out there that this series is going to be

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Speaker 1: even more boring and unwatchable than both Spurs Nets Finals.

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Speaker 1: In fact, that Spurs Nets Finals Doning was so unwatchable

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Speaker 1: people don't even still know what happened in the series,

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Speaker 1: isn't that right?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, a lot of.

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Speaker 2: People say the Spurs won, but since nobody actually watched

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Speaker 2: it and no one can actually verify it, there's a

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Speaker 2: faction of Nets truthers out there who claimed the New

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Speaker 2: Jersey Nets actually won. You know, we've attempted to go

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Speaker 2: back and watch the video, but the cameraman at the

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Speaker 2: game fell asleep, so there's no footage of anything from

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Speaker 2: that series.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, we tried to find it.

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Speaker 1: And you know, in fact, people don't know this, but

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Speaker 1: the Nielsen ratings for that series were so low because

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Speaker 1: many TVs actually automatically turned themselves off and went into

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Speaker 1: sleep mode when on the TV they were actually just

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Speaker 1: showing Tim Duncan in the sleepy Spurs offense, but the

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Speaker 1: TV just thought nothing was happening, so you know, shut

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Speaker 1: down exactly.

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Speaker 2: You know, I still personally believe that the Nets one.

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Speaker 2: I mean, think about it. Do you know anyone who

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Speaker 2: saw the Spurs win those two titles? It's very suspicious,

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Speaker 2: don't you think?

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Speaker 1: Very suspicious. You know, we'll never know, you never know

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Speaker 1: the truth things exactly. But you know it's not all

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Speaker 1: da for people out there, you know, worried about this

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Speaker 1: thunder Paces series, and you know, Spurs Nets Part three,

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Speaker 1: there are still ways to save this series coming up

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Speaker 1: and make it somewhat watchable. And Tony, you add some

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Speaker 1: great ideas. Why do you tell the people one of them.

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Speaker 2: You know, I think the Thunder Paces series can only

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Speaker 2: work if each team is allowed to bring back one

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Speaker 2: player from its team history. I think the Thunder should

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Speaker 2: bring back Russell Westbrook and the Paces should bring back

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Speaker 2: rona Test. But instead of playing against each other, they're

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Speaker 2: pitted against all the fans in the stands to see

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Speaker 2: who can make it out of the arena alive. You know,

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Speaker 2: we could even rename the thunder Stadium the thunder Dome

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Speaker 2: and do it mad Max style where almost everyone dies.

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Speaker 2: Now that's a Thunder Paces series I would watch.

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Speaker 3: That is a series I would watch.

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Speaker 1: And Tody on that note, I just saw something come

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Speaker 1: through hit that sound that we got breaking those in

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Speaker 1: all right? This just didn't from the ESPN website. You

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Speaker 1: know the Thunder used to be the Sonics. Well, former

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Speaker 1: Sonics player Sean Kemp has just pled guilty to assault

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Speaker 1: with a deadly weapon after shooting at two men.

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Speaker 3: In a mall parking lot. Wow, Tony, your instant reaction.

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Speaker 2: Wow, this is just perfect timing, because what is the

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Speaker 2: NBA built on nowadays outside shooters exactly. Sean Kemp is

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Speaker 2: clearly also a perfect fit for the Sonic slash Thunder

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Speaker 2: to bring back. He's the kind of long range and

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Speaker 2: also point blank range shooter people want to see but

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Speaker 2: then also want to run from.

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Speaker 1: Well, that dope, but it's not terrific instance analysis that

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Speaker 1: Tony and Dank. Well, you know, Tony, you're not the

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Speaker 1: only one coming up with some very bold ideas to

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Speaker 1: fix this series. You know, you've heard from your sources

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Speaker 1: that Adam Silver himself is also considering some very bold ideas,

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Speaker 1: isn't it.

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Speaker 2: Absolutely My sources inside the league tell me that Adam

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Speaker 2: Silver is considering secretly replacing the Paces with the Lakers

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Speaker 2: and hoping nobody notices or even cares. Well, first off,

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Speaker 2: they both wear yellow jerseys, and their names already have

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Speaker 2: four of the same letters, so you could just SHOPI

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Speaker 2: in Lakers to look like Paces. So if you're watching

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Speaker 2: on your phone and it's all small, you're not even

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Speaker 2: gonna be able to tell. And also, most people haven't

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Speaker 2: watched any Paces games at all, so nobody's gonna know

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Speaker 2: who's on the team.

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Speaker 3: Anyways.

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Speaker 1: That is an interesting point that, Donny, but a little

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Speaker 1: too far fetched from Adam Silver. You know, you had

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Speaker 1: other ideas that I think were much more reasonable. Tell

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Speaker 1: the people that other one.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, of course, you know what I think is most

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Speaker 2: reasonable to help a thunder Paces series become watchable is

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Speaker 2: to just have Caitlin Clark join the Paces. She's already

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Speaker 2: on an Indiana basketball team, and since she's injured, you know,

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Speaker 2: she can't play in the WNBA anyway, so it would

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Speaker 2: be so historic to see the first woman win the

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Speaker 2: NBA finals. That's, of course, if you're not counting Dennis Rodman.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, if you don't count Probman. But a great point that, Dony,

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Speaker 1: and thank you. All right, Well, you know what I'm

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Speaker 1: about to say next very controversial, I know, gonna make

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Speaker 1: out lines, you know, be around the internet whatever, But

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Speaker 1: I for one and many people, we're not exactly thrilled

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Speaker 1: with this Shay Gilligan Alexander winning MVP. You know, that's

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Speaker 1: seven years in a row now that a foreign born

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Speaker 1: player has won MVP.

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Speaker 3: Terror.

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Speaker 1: You know, we gotta we gotta fix this foreign a problem, Tony,

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Speaker 1: and you had an idea on how to fix it.

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Speaker 3: Tell the people one word, tariffs.

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Speaker 2: You know, we need to start charging the team's extra

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Speaker 2: for signing foreign born players. You know, we need to

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Speaker 2: get back to American born players. You know, people out

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Speaker 2: there may say, well, what about Joe l Embiid, But

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Speaker 2: Joel Embiid is just further proof of what happens when

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Speaker 2: you and port foreign made products.

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Speaker 3: They're all flimsy and they break easily.

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Speaker 2: You know, Joel Embiid, hum days anything on Team Move.

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Speaker 1: Take your pick, yeah, exactly. If Thunder may be happy now,

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Speaker 1: but check back in four years when this Shay Gilligan

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Speaker 1: is a shipwrecked exact anyway, let's say in the Western

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Speaker 1: Conference finals and just talk about what went wrong there

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Speaker 1: for the Timberwolves. You know, they had so much momentum

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Speaker 1: coming into the series. You know, as we all know,

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Speaker 1: they had so much length. And by that we're talking

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Speaker 1: about Anthony Edwards, of course, allegedly giant phoenix that they

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Speaker 1: get bragging about. But Tony, it's very easy to see

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Speaker 1: where everything went wrong for him specifically, isn't it totally?

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Speaker 2: Anthony Edwards played so much better on the road than

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Speaker 2: he did at home, and there's one clear reason for

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Speaker 2: that shrinkage. You know, inside the cold weather climate of Minnesota,

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Speaker 2: his allegedly massive penis clearly shriveled up.

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Speaker 4: You know.

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Speaker 2: Meanwhile, he and it his giant penis both thrived in

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Speaker 2: the warmer climates of Los Angeles, Oakland and even Oklahoma City.

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Speaker 2: You know, if I'm Anthonny Edwards, I'm asking for a

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Speaker 2: trade to the warm climate of Miami that will almost

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Speaker 2: certainly extend his career and also his penis.

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Speaker 1: There's great points all around, Donny. And of course what

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Speaker 1: we bring this up.

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Speaker 3: We got to talk.

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Speaker 1: About the player who had the most allegedly massive penis

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Speaker 1: in the history of NBA possibly time.

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Speaker 3: Of course, I'm talking about Shaqui exactly.

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Speaker 1: You know, he had success in Orlando, Los Angeles, Miami,

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Speaker 1: but what happened when he went to Cleveland, Boston, cold weather.

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Speaker 3: Shrinkage.

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Speaker 2: I mean, it was Shack's penis, so it was still

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Speaker 2: absolutely massive relative to any normal human, but still shrinkage

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Speaker 2: brought it down.

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Speaker 3: Exactly, shrinkage.

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Speaker 1: You know, on the subject of shrinkage, we have to

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Speaker 1: talk about the shrinking quality of the ESPN basketball broadcast.

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Speaker 3: What a sege was exactly?

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Speaker 1: I say, people, your journalist students out, they see that's

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Speaker 1: how you do a segue. You take the one thing shrinkage,

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Speaker 1: which was formally about penis size, right, but I made

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Speaker 1: it about ESPN broadcast squad write that down exactly. So

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Speaker 1: that's that's how you make it, and that's how you

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Speaker 1: do So watching first take the other day, which I

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Speaker 1: never do, and of course I instantly regret it because

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Speaker 1: it was the after game two of the Thunderworld series.

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Speaker 1: All right, and this and this, the graphic comes across

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Speaker 1: the screen and it says, is this series over after

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Speaker 1: game two?

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Speaker 3: How ridiculous is that?

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Speaker 1: Donny?

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Speaker 3: Absolutely ridiculous.

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Speaker 2: You know, isn't ESPN supposed to be a sports news network.

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Speaker 3: They don't even know how long this series is yep.

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Speaker 3: Everybody knows that it's a best of seven series, yep.

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Speaker 2: So that means the series isn't over until a team

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Speaker 2: wins four games, then the series is over.

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Speaker 3: I can't believe I even have to explain it. I

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Speaker 3: can't believe you have to explain it either, Tony. Just blickball.

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Speaker 1: You know, another thing just we got to talk about

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Speaker 1: while with talking basketball, we got to talk about this

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Speaker 1: situation in the WNBA. You know, there's this outrage after

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Speaker 1: the league announced that it ended its probe into.

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Speaker 3: The racial slurs hurled that Angel race.

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Speaker 1: You know, when a team, the Chicago Sky played in Indiana. Yeah, well,

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Speaker 1: the league came out and said, well, they couldn't find

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Speaker 1: the person who said the racial slurs. And it's Tony

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Speaker 1: very easy to see why this investigation went nowhere, is it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, My sources tell me that the WNBA couldn't identify

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Speaker 2: the one person who is hurling those racial slurs at

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Speaker 2: Angel Reese because Indiana just has too many racists. You know,

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Speaker 2: it would take way too much time to interview all

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Speaker 2: of them. I mean you'd have to interview about fourteen,

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Speaker 2: three hundred and fifty seven racists just.

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Speaker 3: In the arena alone.

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Speaker 2: That's why the WNBA can't expand to Mississippi.

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Speaker 3: I mean they'd have to interview the whole state. Great

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Speaker 3: point that, Doni and the.

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Speaker 1: Maes.

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Speaker 3: That sound and you know what that means.

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Speaker 1: It's time to get out your Fusco bet app because

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Speaker 1: Dony is about to make his NBA Finals prediction. Don'ty

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Speaker 1: take it away.

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Speaker 2: This is my prediction for the NBA Finals, which unfortunately

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Speaker 2: is gonna be Thunder paces Game one, Thunder win, Game two,

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Speaker 2: Thunder win again.

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Speaker 3: Game three.

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Speaker 2: ABC pre empts the Finals to show something that will

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Speaker 2: get better ratings, celebrity Wheel of Fortune, which will be

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Speaker 2: one in Alan Slide by Wayne Brady and Game four.

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Speaker 2: In order to recoup lost funds from the crappy finals,

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Speaker 2: ABC will show five straight hours of the My Pillow

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Speaker 2: Info Mershall.

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Speaker 3: Wow, just terrific analysis. That's sound again another lines.

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Speaker 1: It's time for what of Dony's bonus bets? Don'ty give

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Speaker 1: him your bonus bet for the week.

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Speaker 2: Here's my bonus bet of the week in the thunder

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Speaker 2: Paces series. I'm taking the over one and a half

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Speaker 2: national anthems being sung by John Cougar Mellencamp. This series

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Speaker 2: has Mellencamp anthem written all over it, and if you

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Speaker 2: want to parlay, I'm taking Mellencamp to sing small Town

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Speaker 2: during halftime.

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Speaker 1: All right, well, now it's time for our favorite part

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Speaker 1: of the show. The ads when we make all our money.

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Speaker 1: So here we go. Let's line one up. You know

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Speaker 1: we got sponsors is knocking down the doors. Well, here's

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Speaker 1: one our latest sponsor, Fresh Clean Threads, take it away.

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Speaker 1: You know, obviously the best thing to wear is a

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Speaker 1: beautiful green football jersey. Yeah, but what do you do

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Speaker 1: on that one day every two weeks when your football

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Speaker 1: jersey's in the wash? The answer is simple, Fresh Clean

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Speaker 1: Threads and Tony. You've got one of their shirts on

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Speaker 1: right now, don't you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's beneath my beautiful green football jersey. But let

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Speaker 2: me show you. This shirt is so fresh and so

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Speaker 2: clean and so soft that I'm even actually considering wearing

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Speaker 2: it on days when my beautiful green football jersey isn't

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Speaker 2: in the wash.

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Speaker 1: You know, I got mine on now, Tony and looking good,

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Speaker 1: very comfortable, very soft uff. But I gotta say, you know,

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Speaker 1: it kind of wish it had you know, a big

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Speaker 1: number five right here, and you know, maybe the team

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Speaker 1: logos right here right there.

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Speaker 3: we'll talk to them tomorrow.

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Speaker 1: percent off. Go there now, Yeah, okay, we're back from

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Speaker 1: commercial now ten times riche thank you very much, and

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Speaker 1: all right, boy, you know what, Tony, let's just go

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Speaker 1: ahead wrap it right there.

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Speaker 3: We get the takes and we got our ads and

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Speaker 3: then oh you kidding me?

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Speaker 1: Oh?

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Speaker 3: What the heck is going on? He's not even in

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Speaker 3: the studio. Where are you? Where are you? Right now?

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Speaker 4: Here's where I am.

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Speaker 3: I'm doing my job exactly. Nobody cares where you are.

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Speaker 3: He's still learning. But seriously, where are you, comedian? Where

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Speaker 3: are you?

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Speaker 4: I'm in Florida?

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Speaker 3: Okay, what are you doing there? Dying like most people?

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Speaker 4: Hopefully I'm not a conference. I flew down here today

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Speaker 4: from Newark.

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Speaker 3: Oh, from Newark.

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Speaker 1: See the people at Newark again, Tony failing to do

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Speaker 1: their jobs. Of all the planes they could have made disappear,

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Speaker 1: they failed to.

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Speaker 3: Make the only one that the one did. But unfortunately

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Speaker 3: he's here, Tony, what do you want anyway? Why are

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Speaker 3: you even talking?

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Speaker 4: Wow?

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Speaker 3: Direct?

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Speaker 4: Well you said a kill on Neil was successful in

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Speaker 4: warm weather climates.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, bro, yeah, learn basketball?

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Speaker 4: Bro. Okay, well shock plate in Phoenix, which is a

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Speaker 4: warm weather climate, and he kind of sucked there. So

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Speaker 4: how do you explain that?

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Speaker 1: Well, I'm going to drop you in a warm weather

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Speaker 1: climate a volcano.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you remind me of a Phoenix River of Phoenix dead.

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Speaker 3: Oh great one, Doty.

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Speaker 4: And what you called the singer John Cougar Mellencamp.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, Bro, respect the legend.

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Speaker 5: Bro.

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Speaker 4: You stopped using Cougar thirty years ago. It just goes

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Speaker 4: by John Mellencamp. Now, time to update your references.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, well, uh, you're gonna need to update your

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Speaker 1: references on your resume after we fire you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know what, Cougar, I keep using your mom

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Speaker 2: Oh great one.

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Speaker 3: Do what what.

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Speaker 4: You said? Hondai's are unreliable for made products that break easily.

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Speaker 3: Totally bro, buy American, Bro.

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Speaker 4: Hondays are literally the most dependable cars on the market today.

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Speaker 4: They wouldn't safety awards every single you.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, well I can't wait until you Handai.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and I want to congratulate you on the award

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Speaker 2: you win every year, smallest Penis.

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Speaker 1: And you want to talk about award winners. Tony just

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Speaker 1: booked next week on the show super Bowl MVP winner,

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Speaker 1: Eagles legend Nick Foles, forget you like.

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Speaker 5: Your subscribe, your rate and review on Apple five stars.

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Speaker 5: All leave all comments, full comments, but leave them all

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Speaker 5: the reels and everything exactly a Tony, great job as always,

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Speaker 5: same to you, poorly, another floorless show.

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Speaker 3: There you go, see people next week. See your