WEBVTT - Second Cup: Plan it in, do it anyway

0:00:03.279 --> 0:00:09.240
<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning.

0:00:09.600 --> 0:00:14.280
<v Speaker 1>This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's

0:00:14.280 --> 0:00:17.080
<v Speaker 1>tip is a phrase I repeat to myself all the time.

0:00:17.920 --> 0:00:21.800
<v Speaker 1>Plan it in, do it anyway. I find I make

0:00:21.920 --> 0:00:24.040
<v Speaker 1>much better use of my time when I think beyond

0:00:24.079 --> 0:00:28.240
<v Speaker 1>how I feel right now, A better question when I

0:00:28.240 --> 0:00:31.880
<v Speaker 1>think about how I spend my time looking back? Will

0:00:31.880 --> 0:00:34.640
<v Speaker 1>I be happy I did this? Will I be happy

0:00:34.640 --> 0:00:39.240
<v Speaker 1>with this memory? If so, my experiencing self just needs

0:00:39.280 --> 0:00:43.360
<v Speaker 1>to get on board. That phrase experiencing self comes from

0:00:43.360 --> 0:00:48.280
<v Speaker 1>psychologist Daniel Kanneman's work. This Nobel Prize winning researcher noted

0:00:48.280 --> 0:00:51.760
<v Speaker 1>that the self really has multiple identities. There's what we're

0:00:51.760 --> 0:00:54.279
<v Speaker 1>going through right at this instant, the moment when you're

0:00:54.320 --> 0:00:57.160
<v Speaker 1>listening to me tell you about this topic. But much

0:00:57.200 --> 0:01:00.720
<v Speaker 1>of our internal lives actually involve the remembering self, the

0:01:00.800 --> 0:01:04.240
<v Speaker 1>keeper of our memories. You think back to your life

0:01:04.240 --> 0:01:06.440
<v Speaker 1>and the story of what brought you to this moment.

0:01:06.840 --> 0:01:08.640
<v Speaker 1>I actually like to think about this in terms of

0:01:08.680 --> 0:01:12.880
<v Speaker 1>three selves, the experiencing self and the remembering self, but

0:01:12.959 --> 0:01:16.800
<v Speaker 1>also the anticipating self. Another big chunk of our interior

0:01:16.840 --> 0:01:20.720
<v Speaker 1>monologues consists of our plans, hopes, and anxieties about the future.

0:01:21.520 --> 0:01:24.200
<v Speaker 1>You might be commuting on a rainy day, but you're

0:01:24.240 --> 0:01:27.360
<v Speaker 1>thinking about that sunny beach vacation you have planned for August.

0:01:28.120 --> 0:01:32.240
<v Speaker 1>Our brains have an amazing ability to time travel backwards

0:01:32.319 --> 0:01:36.080
<v Speaker 1>and forwards. Here's why this matters as we think about

0:01:36.080 --> 0:01:39.440
<v Speaker 1>how we spend our time. The present is actually an

0:01:39.440 --> 0:01:44.000
<v Speaker 1>incredibly ephemeral moment. In his book The Principles of Psychology,

0:01:44.440 --> 0:01:48.480
<v Speaker 1>William James writes, where is it this present? It has

0:01:48.520 --> 0:01:51.480
<v Speaker 1>melted in our grasp, fled ere, We could touch it,

0:01:52.200 --> 0:01:56.280
<v Speaker 1>gone in the instant of becoming. Back in William James's day,

0:01:56.320 --> 0:01:59.080
<v Speaker 1>there was a lot of strange experimental inquiry into the

0:01:59.160 --> 0:02:03.240
<v Speaker 1>exact length of the present. Our senses can't distinguish between

0:02:03.240 --> 0:02:05.840
<v Speaker 1>things that happen less than about a half second apart,

0:02:06.320 --> 0:02:09.440
<v Speaker 1>and working memory is a maximum of about twelve seconds.

0:02:09.800 --> 0:02:12.239
<v Speaker 1>So the length of the present must be somewhere in there,

0:02:12.760 --> 0:02:14.960
<v Speaker 1>or at least that's what I gather from reading about

0:02:14.960 --> 0:02:19.760
<v Speaker 1>these various experiments. So the present is fleeting. Almost all

0:02:19.800 --> 0:02:23.640
<v Speaker 1>of life is lived by the anticipating and remembering selves.

0:02:24.400 --> 0:02:28.120
<v Speaker 1>We can anticipate for years, we can remember for decades

0:02:28.880 --> 0:02:32.680
<v Speaker 1>The challenge is that the present, the moment occupied by

0:02:32.680 --> 0:02:36.840
<v Speaker 1>the experiencing self, has a disproportionate effect on our actions,

0:02:37.560 --> 0:02:42.600
<v Speaker 1>and frankly, the experiencing self is a little bit lazy.

0:02:42.800 --> 0:02:45.440
<v Speaker 1>The remembering self will be thrilled to have gone on

0:02:45.480 --> 0:02:48.080
<v Speaker 1>that early morning trail run so she can see the

0:02:48.080 --> 0:02:52.880
<v Speaker 1>gorgeous sun rise over that nearby lake. The experiencing self, well,

0:02:53.200 --> 0:02:56.000
<v Speaker 1>she's comfortable in bed, hitting snooze until the sun is

0:02:56.080 --> 0:02:59.519
<v Speaker 1>high in the sky. The anticipating self thought it would

0:02:59.520 --> 0:03:01.120
<v Speaker 1>be fun to go to an art museum on a

0:03:01.120 --> 0:03:04.440
<v Speaker 1>Friday night when admission is free and there's a bar

0:03:04.960 --> 0:03:08.280
<v Speaker 1>and music, and the remembering self will fondly recall the

0:03:08.360 --> 0:03:11.799
<v Speaker 1>masterpieces and chatting with new friends in line for a cocktail.

0:03:12.520 --> 0:03:16.760
<v Speaker 1>But the experiencing self is tired after work. The experiencing

0:03:16.800 --> 0:03:18.639
<v Speaker 1>self is the one who will have to brave the

0:03:18.680 --> 0:03:21.840
<v Speaker 1>cold and the rain and the Friday night traffic. The

0:03:21.880 --> 0:03:24.600
<v Speaker 1>experiencing self is not happy about this split of labor,

0:03:25.360 --> 0:03:29.959
<v Speaker 1>so she rebels. She ignores what the anticipating and remembering

0:03:30.000 --> 0:03:33.280
<v Speaker 1>self want, and justifies this tantrum by pointing out that

0:03:33.280 --> 0:03:36.160
<v Speaker 1>the museum will still be there next Friday, so she's

0:03:36.280 --> 0:03:40.400
<v Speaker 1>just going to watch Netflix instead, immediate pleasure wins out

0:03:40.440 --> 0:03:43.800
<v Speaker 1>over the more effortful sort. One of the best ways

0:03:43.840 --> 0:03:47.560
<v Speaker 1>I've heard this phenomenon described is in philosopher Robert Gruden's

0:03:47.560 --> 0:03:51.560
<v Speaker 1>book Time and the Art of Living. He says, we

0:03:51.640 --> 0:03:56.240
<v Speaker 1>pamper the present like a spoiled child. We indulge its

0:03:56.240 --> 0:03:59.560
<v Speaker 1>whim to scroll through Instagram instead of living a life

0:03:59.720 --> 0:04:03.240
<v Speaker 1>worth taking pictures about. So how do we keep the

0:04:03.280 --> 0:04:08.080
<v Speaker 1>experiencing selfs tyranny in check? It isn't easy. People are

0:04:08.120 --> 0:04:10.520
<v Speaker 1>bad at considering their future selves in general, which is

0:04:10.560 --> 0:04:14.640
<v Speaker 1>why so few people invest properly for retirement. But that's

0:04:14.680 --> 0:04:18.160
<v Speaker 1>where my mantra comes in. Whenever I find myself listening

0:04:18.160 --> 0:04:21.440
<v Speaker 1>too much to the experiencing self, I repeat my phrase,

0:04:22.240 --> 0:04:27.000
<v Speaker 1>plan it in do it anyway. If my anticipating self

0:04:27.040 --> 0:04:30.799
<v Speaker 1>really wanted to do something, my remembering self will probably

0:04:30.920 --> 0:04:33.640
<v Speaker 1>be glad that I did it. I may be tired,

0:04:33.680 --> 0:04:37.919
<v Speaker 1>but guess what, I'll always be tired, and we draw

0:04:38.120 --> 0:04:46.000
<v Speaker 1>energy from meaningful things. Furthermore, all time passes, whether I

0:04:46.080 --> 0:04:50.400
<v Speaker 1>do anything today or not. Eventually today will be gone,

0:04:50.720 --> 0:04:54.640
<v Speaker 1>Tomorrow will be gone too. Time can be filled with

0:04:54.680 --> 0:04:58.080
<v Speaker 1>what amounts to nothing, or it can be filled with

0:04:58.120 --> 0:05:01.760
<v Speaker 1>something more meaningful. So if you'd like to have time

0:05:01.880 --> 0:05:06.960
<v Speaker 1>feel richer and more meaningful, plan in exciting things the

0:05:07.000 --> 0:05:09.880
<v Speaker 1>many adventures we've talked about in previous episodes, and some

0:05:10.080 --> 0:05:13.960
<v Speaker 1>bigger adventures too. And then when you get to the

0:05:14.000 --> 0:05:17.640
<v Speaker 1>moment and you are wavering because your couch seems inviting,

0:05:18.320 --> 0:05:24.279
<v Speaker 1>repeat this phrase. Plan it in. Do it anyway. Your

0:05:24.320 --> 0:05:27.640
<v Speaker 1>remembering self will thank you. In fact, if you want

0:05:27.640 --> 0:05:30.520
<v Speaker 1>to encourage this mindset in the future, take a moment

0:05:30.640 --> 0:05:34.520
<v Speaker 1>right now to thank your past experiencing self for having

0:05:34.560 --> 0:05:39.000
<v Speaker 1>done something difficult that you can now smile upon. I

0:05:39.160 --> 0:05:41.359
<v Speaker 1>just spent some time looking through photos I took a

0:05:41.360 --> 0:05:44.240
<v Speaker 1>few weeks ago of my kids at a botanical garden.

0:05:45.120 --> 0:05:47.120
<v Speaker 1>They did not want to turn off their video games

0:05:47.120 --> 0:05:49.960
<v Speaker 1>and get in the car. My experiencing self did not

0:05:50.080 --> 0:05:53.000
<v Speaker 1>enjoy that battle. But all that is in the past. Now.

0:05:53.839 --> 0:05:57.520
<v Speaker 1>What is left are these images of sunshine and flowers

0:05:58.160 --> 0:06:01.080
<v Speaker 1>and children in a moment of childhood that will be

0:06:01.120 --> 0:06:05.040
<v Speaker 1>gone before I know it. So what will you decide

0:06:05.080 --> 0:06:08.919
<v Speaker 1>to do anyway today? Feel free to let me know

0:06:09.200 --> 0:06:14.320
<v Speaker 1>at Before Breakfast podcast at iHeartMedia dot com. In the meantime,

0:06:14.800 --> 0:06:17.960
<v Speaker 1>this is Laura, thanks for listening and here's to making

0:06:18.000 --> 0:06:26.520
<v Speaker 1>the most of our time. Hey everybody, I'd love to

0:06:26.560 --> 0:06:29.520
<v Speaker 1>hear from you. You can send me your tips, your questions,

0:06:29.640 --> 0:06:33.400
<v Speaker 1>or anything else. Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook

0:06:33.480 --> 0:06:38.280
<v Speaker 1>and Instagram at Before Breakfast Pod. That's b E the

0:06:38.400 --> 0:06:43.000
<v Speaker 1>number four then Breakfast pod. You can also shoot me

0:06:43.040 --> 0:06:47.360
<v Speaker 1>an email at Before Breakfast podcast at iHeartMedia dot com

0:06:47.400 --> 0:06:49.920
<v Speaker 1>that Before Breakfast is spelled out with all the letters.

0:06:50.560 --> 0:06:52.640
<v Speaker 1>Thanks so much. Should I look forward to staying in touch.

0:06:58.480 --> 0:07:02.520
<v Speaker 1>Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts

0:07:02.520 --> 0:07:07.479
<v Speaker 1>from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever

0:07:07.520 --> 0:07:11.280
<v Speaker 1>you listen to your favorite shows.