WEBVTT - No Bullies In Space 0:00:00.280 --> 0:00:04.800 It's too easy, I think, to not be accountable for 0:00:04.880 --> 0:00:06.320 the things that we share and the things that we 0:00:06.360 --> 0:00:08.560 say to each other online. It's a new bullying. 0:00:09.119 --> 0:00:13.520 LGBTQ plus adults are nearly three times more likely to 0:00:13.640 --> 0:00:15.200 experience online harassment. 0:00:15.600 --> 0:00:18.239 Don't seek external validation. If you like what you see 0:00:18.239 --> 0:00:20.200 in the mirror, that's literally all that matters. 0:00:20.600 --> 0:00:24.000 Look, I was bullied in school, I know, and to 0:00:24.040 --> 0:00:26.400 this day, you know, my parents have both said to me, 0:00:26.600 --> 0:00:29.000 you know, why didn't you feel comfortable to share? It's 0:00:29.000 --> 0:00:29.880 like I was ashamed. 0:00:30.360 --> 0:00:33.640 It's strange to me that people will stop and take 0:00:33.760 --> 0:00:37.559 even a second of their day to comment on somebody's appearance. 0:00:37.760 --> 0:00:39.960 I don't. I don't. That one for me is like 0:00:40.000 --> 0:00:41.760 goes right over my head. Like that one, I don't 0:00:41.800 --> 0:00:42.680 understand completely. 0:00:43.000 --> 0:00:46.000 I have somebody actively in my life who I have 0:00:46.040 --> 0:00:47.879 a lot of love and care for, and who I 0:00:48.360 --> 0:00:50.000 know has a lot of love and care for me, 0:00:50.320 --> 0:00:52.800 but has told me to my face with a smile, 0:00:52.920 --> 0:00:57.560 that I'm possessed by a demon and that's why I'm gay. 0:00:57.880 --> 0:01:12.120 Oh yeah, and no, we are the hard of health ladies, earthlings, 0:01:12.160 --> 0:01:15.720 space beings, and those hiding in the comment section welcome 0:01:15.760 --> 0:01:18.920 back to in our own world. Today, we're diving deep 0:01:18.920 --> 0:01:21.839 into the digital abyss to discuss something that's become all 0:01:21.920 --> 0:01:26.640 too common in our connected lives, cyberbullying. It's raw and 0:01:26.680 --> 0:01:29.200 real and yep, we're even pulling out some of the 0:01:29.200 --> 0:01:33.760 more ruthless, hilarious and bizarre comments that we've received. We're 0:01:33.760 --> 0:01:36.000 so happy to be back here with you and ready 0:01:36.040 --> 0:01:36.720 to get started. 0:01:37.560 --> 0:01:41.760 Yeah. Wow. Comment section is definitely a dangerous place. 0:01:41.520 --> 0:01:44.840 To be, you know, it could be a great place 0:01:44.880 --> 0:01:49.840 to be. It can be a place where conversations are had, 0:01:51.000 --> 0:01:55.480 where misinformation is debunked, where we can find similarities in 0:01:56.120 --> 0:02:01.720 comedy and find answers to our questions. Think what's actually 0:02:01.720 --> 0:02:06.520 going on in a video that you can't really properly interpret? Yeah, 0:02:06.560 --> 0:02:08.839 like what was that? What was I supposed to catch there? 0:02:09.600 --> 0:02:11.360 Or what was she wearing? Or does anybody know the 0:02:11.400 --> 0:02:12.120 name of this song? 0:02:12.480 --> 0:02:12.560 No? 0:02:12.720 --> 0:02:14.800 Yeah, for that, it's useful. I meant more like the 0:02:14.880 --> 0:02:17.800 more negative comments, which is a lot of what people 0:02:17.840 --> 0:02:21.639 associate when you talking about cyberbullying, because especially because you're 0:02:21.720 --> 0:02:27.400 hiding behind essentially the Internet or you know, whatever interface 0:02:27.440 --> 0:02:30.400 you're using to communicate, and honestly, like you know, I've 0:02:30.480 --> 0:02:33.639 told both you and my mom and certain other people. 0:02:33.760 --> 0:02:37.840 You know, because the people that are commenting, they want 0:02:37.919 --> 0:02:40.919 you negative things a lot of the time. They want 0:02:40.960 --> 0:02:43.560 you to respond, they want to get a rise out 0:02:43.560 --> 0:02:45.840 of you. And you have to be really careful about 0:02:45.880 --> 0:02:48.160 what you give your energy to. But it's hard. You 0:02:48.240 --> 0:02:51.680 have to develop a thick skin and try not to 0:02:51.720 --> 0:02:56.120 take certain things personally. Not only you know. Obviously, if 0:02:56.160 --> 0:02:58.560 you're in the public eye or if you have a podcast, 0:02:58.680 --> 0:03:00.200 you're kind of you know, people would say, oh, you're 0:03:00.200 --> 0:03:00.919 asking for it. 0:03:01.320 --> 0:03:02.760 You're never asking for no. 0:03:02.880 --> 0:03:04.760 But I do think that in this day and age, 0:03:04.760 --> 0:03:07.200 it should be expected. So it's important to talk about 0:03:07.240 --> 0:03:08.519 it for sure, so. 0:03:08.400 --> 0:03:12.160 That we are what's happening. I mean people, Maybe we 0:03:12.160 --> 0:03:14.640 should define cyber but yeah, looks through it. So it's 0:03:14.639 --> 0:03:17.360 defined as the use of technology to harass, threat, and 0:03:17.440 --> 0:03:21.600 embarrass or target another person. Online threats and mean, aggressive 0:03:21.680 --> 0:03:24.840 or rude text, tweets, posts, or messages all count. So 0:03:24.919 --> 0:03:28.120 it is posting personal information, pictures or videos designed to 0:03:28.200 --> 0:03:29.519 hurt or embarrass someone else. 0:03:30.200 --> 0:03:31.960 Yeah, like posting videos. 0:03:32.919 --> 0:03:36.640 I think that social media has become like a battleground 0:03:36.840 --> 0:03:40.360 in a way for a lot of things. And sometimes 0:03:40.440 --> 0:03:43.680 in a positive In a positive light, social media can 0:03:44.000 --> 0:03:47.280 illuminate certain issues that maybe we should be talking about. 0:03:47.760 --> 0:03:50.800 But I also find that people use social media as 0:03:51.080 --> 0:03:56.200 like a tool that with when used with malicious intent, 0:03:56.360 --> 0:04:00.160 can destroy lives. Oh yeah, that's a war with no regulation. 0:04:00.200 --> 0:04:01.480 But I want to talk a little bit about the 0:04:01.480 --> 0:04:06.080 statistics of cyberbullying because I think sometimes older generations are 0:04:06.800 --> 0:04:12.320 used to tolerating certain things because they were taught that 0:04:12.440 --> 0:04:17.720 tolerating those things equal strength. And thanks to psychology and 0:04:17.800 --> 0:04:20.680 the advancements in mental health, we know that that is 0:04:20.720 --> 0:04:25.240 actually a traumatic way of thinking, because there are real 0:04:25.560 --> 0:04:29.440 life consequences for these things, whether we believe they should 0:04:29.480 --> 0:04:32.960 exist or not. So twenty six point five percent of 0:04:33.000 --> 0:04:36.880 American teenagers have experienced cyber bullying within the last thirty days. 0:04:37.680 --> 0:04:40.400 Seventy three percent of girls and young women have received 0:04:40.480 --> 0:04:43.960 unwanted sexual content online. Twenty eight point six of US 0:04:43.960 --> 0:04:46.880 females aged thirteen through seventeen have been cyberbullied in the 0:04:46.920 --> 0:04:50.400 past month. Over their lifetime, fifty nine point two percent 0:04:50.440 --> 0:04:52.839 of girls and forty nine point five percent of boys 0:04:52.880 --> 0:04:56.359 age thirteen to seventeen have experienced cyber bullying. Black middle 0:04:56.360 --> 0:04:59.159 school age cyber bullying victims are one hundred and thirty 0:04:59.200 --> 0:05:02.800 five percent more likely to consider and plan suicide. Bullied 0:05:03.000 --> 0:05:06.080 LGBTQ middle and high school students are three times more 0:05:06.200 --> 0:05:08.320 likely to attempt suicide in the past year compared to 0:05:08.360 --> 0:05:11.240 non bullied peers. Seventy seven point five percent of cyber 0:05:11.279 --> 0:05:13.960 bullied students report that someone posted mean or hurtful things 0:05:13.960 --> 0:05:16.360 about them online, making it the most prevalent form of 0:05:16.400 --> 0:05:19.920 cyber bullying. Thirty percent of teens surveyed over multiple studies 0:05:19.920 --> 0:05:22.760 have reported being siluberbullied at some point in their lifetimes, 0:05:23.240 --> 0:05:25.800 and in twenty twenty three, sixteen percent of students reported 0:05:25.839 --> 0:05:28.839 being bullied electronically, according to the CDC's Youth Risk Behavior 0:05:28.880 --> 0:05:32.400 Surveillance System. So it's the new bullying. It's too easy, 0:05:32.560 --> 0:05:36.440 i think, to not be accountable for the things that 0:05:36.480 --> 0:05:38.080 we share and the things that we say to each 0:05:38.080 --> 0:05:41.360 other online. For one, you're a perfect stranger talking to 0:05:41.400 --> 0:05:44.000 a perfect stranger. You have no personal connection to that person, 0:05:44.480 --> 0:05:47.640 you have no responsibility to them whatsoever, so you think, 0:05:48.160 --> 0:05:52.240 and so it's almost like it's easier to loosen the 0:05:52.279 --> 0:05:54.599 tongue and say the thing that you would never say 0:05:54.680 --> 0:05:57.080 in person, because I think in person we have a 0:05:57.080 --> 0:06:00.600 little bit more of our politeness intact. But it's also 0:06:01.960 --> 0:06:05.640 I mean true, true, but still but still. And I 0:06:05.680 --> 0:06:11.440 think also you have the element of alternate profiles. I've 0:06:11.440 --> 0:06:16.200 seen so many people who are are ruthless in what 0:06:16.240 --> 0:06:18.560 they say and what they share, and you click on 0:06:18.600 --> 0:06:22.240 their profile and they have you know, a stock photo, 0:06:22.880 --> 0:06:27.279 zero posts, zero followers, private you know there, and and 0:06:27.360 --> 0:06:29.280 it makes you think, you're like, all right, is this 0:06:29.800 --> 0:06:32.599 a real person who maybe just doesn't use social media 0:06:32.680 --> 0:06:36.640 or are there really people out there who delight in 0:06:36.800 --> 0:06:40.440 creating a disguise and creating an account online where they 0:06:40.440 --> 0:06:44.160 can spew these hurtful things at other people, whether they 0:06:44.200 --> 0:06:47.440 know them, whether they don't, and get away with it, 0:06:47.800 --> 0:06:52.920 you know, like they almost enjoy how unchecked it is. 0:06:53.320 --> 0:06:57.760 Yeah, we are specifically talking about, you know, cyberbullying and 0:06:57.800 --> 0:07:02.920 how exacerbated bullying can be by the tool that is 0:07:03.000 --> 0:07:06.640 the internet or online, which you just touched upon. Essentially, 0:07:06.720 --> 0:07:11.040 the fact that you can hide behind something because think 0:07:11.080 --> 0:07:14.880 about it, for the longest time, you know, gossiping and 0:07:15.720 --> 0:07:18.600 all of that has been happening. 0:07:19.400 --> 0:07:23.560 I mean there are a whole multiple decade television shows. 0:07:24.000 --> 0:07:29.440 Where Shakespearean plays, It's back even more, and a lot 0:07:29.440 --> 0:07:33.440 of the time it results in people being hurt and 0:07:33.560 --> 0:07:35.720 upset at a specific person. 0:07:36.720 --> 0:07:39.160 But when you don't know where to direct the anger, 0:07:39.320 --> 0:07:42.520 why it's happening, or where it's coming from, which ultimately 0:07:42.560 --> 0:07:43.840 a lot of the time it has to do with 0:07:43.880 --> 0:07:47.200 the person that is viewing that hate, you know, whether 0:07:47.240 --> 0:07:52.000 it be online or otherwise. But I think it's also 0:07:52.640 --> 0:07:55.600 when it's online, there's an element of shame because there's 0:07:55.640 --> 0:07:57.960 a lot of you touched on the statistics. But so 0:07:58.080 --> 0:08:01.760 much of this happens to young kids and young kids 0:08:01.840 --> 0:08:04.040 doing it to each other. Let's be real. And not 0:08:04.120 --> 0:08:07.720 only that, I think that even if it's not the 0:08:07.760 --> 0:08:09.800 parent's fault at all, and I'm not a parent and 0:08:09.840 --> 0:08:12.200 I can't speak to it, I don't know. 0:08:12.200 --> 0:08:14.080 If I agree there, but please continue. 0:08:15.160 --> 0:08:18.080 I mean, I mean that it's difficult for a lot 0:08:18.120 --> 0:08:22.360 of these children to share or they don't share with 0:08:22.440 --> 0:08:25.280 their parents. This person is got it sending me in 0:08:25.360 --> 0:08:31.920 inappropriate photo. Oh, I made a friend online that seems 0:08:31.960 --> 0:08:34.240 really sweet, and all of a sudden starts speaking weird 0:08:34.400 --> 0:08:38.120 and starts scaring me and saying things that are you 0:08:38.160 --> 0:08:39.840 know what I'm saying a lot of the times that 0:08:39.920 --> 0:08:43.400 it's a difficult situation for a child to admit to 0:08:43.480 --> 0:08:47.520 the parent that they are recognizing danger because they also 0:08:47.559 --> 0:08:49.800 don't want to get in trouble and that can lead 0:08:49.840 --> 0:08:52.280 to very dangerous things happening. 0:08:52.559 --> 0:08:56.400 Yeah, I mean, and I think that as we get older, 0:08:56.520 --> 0:09:00.760 I think it comes easier to let always like to say, 0:09:01.160 --> 0:09:03.080 drink a glass of asaline in the morning, so the 0:09:03.120 --> 0:09:05.600 things just slide off of you, even though God, I 0:09:05.640 --> 0:09:09.360 need to take that advice more because things definitely penetrate. 0:09:09.400 --> 0:09:12.040 Okay, I tell you that all the time. I'm telling 0:09:12.080 --> 0:09:14.120 you this for real. You spend a lot of time, 0:09:14.160 --> 0:09:19.480 which equals energy in my heart. I controls to people. 0:09:19.200 --> 0:09:22.200 Online, they are be so for real right now. I 0:09:22.240 --> 0:09:25.680 do not spend Okay, it is such a misrepresentation of 0:09:25.720 --> 0:09:27.920 the truth. I do not spend a lot of time. 0:09:27.960 --> 0:09:30.360 I think that a lot of the time is worth 0:09:30.400 --> 0:09:32.160 it because ultimately. 0:09:31.800 --> 0:09:34.120 Yes, but I would like for you to consider what 0:09:34.120 --> 0:09:36.760 you've just said. I do not spend a lot of 0:09:36.760 --> 0:09:38.000 time focusing on trolls. 0:09:38.840 --> 0:09:43.800 No, not focusing trying to let's say, somebody wants everything 0:09:44.080 --> 0:09:44.560 about me. 0:09:45.000 --> 0:09:46.720 Yeah, I guess so, Okay, So this is what I 0:09:46.720 --> 0:09:48.880 want you to say. Okay, So since you're talking about me, 0:09:48.960 --> 0:09:50.320 I just want to make sure you speak clearly. 0:09:50.360 --> 0:09:52.760 I got it, and I apologize. I guess for me 0:09:52.880 --> 0:09:54.760 on every six months is not a lot of time 0:09:56.240 --> 0:09:59.000 because this is hey, this is we're keeping it real. 0:09:59.040 --> 0:10:01.040 We're keeping it real, working been, You're real, and that's fine, 0:10:01.040 --> 0:10:01.800 I hope everybody. 0:10:01.880 --> 0:10:04.120 Okay, See, so I don't spend a lot of time 0:10:04.160 --> 0:10:06.160 on trolls, but I will once in a blue. 0:10:06.000 --> 0:10:10.160 Moon, okay, and I will rephrase because for me, some apologies, 0:10:10.320 --> 0:10:16.520 thank you, jeezy, my apologies for me. Also, one second 0:10:16.800 --> 0:10:18.920 of my life and time is too much to spend. 0:10:18.960 --> 0:10:21.920 So what I mean is, oftentimes and most of the time, 0:10:21.920 --> 0:10:25.280 it's to defend me or you know, somebody you love, 0:10:25.840 --> 0:10:28.840 or a cause that you really really care about. You know, 0:10:29.000 --> 0:10:31.439 like when you were helping Cuba. 0:10:31.120 --> 0:10:35.720 And all that. Listen when that creator who has a 0:10:36.120 --> 0:10:39.000 large platform, I mean, this is not cyberbullying at all, 0:10:39.000 --> 0:10:42.040 but who has a super large platform, was educating. He's 0:10:42.040 --> 0:10:45.280 a coffee creator, and he was educating on how to 0:10:45.280 --> 0:10:49.760 make Cuban coffee and he misrepresented the whole thing. Yeah. Absolutely, 0:10:49.800 --> 0:10:52.559 I'm gonna say something and guess what happened. He did 0:10:52.559 --> 0:10:54.920 another video. I took the time, and I'm like, not 0:10:54.960 --> 0:10:56.920 only is this problematic because of this and this and 0:10:56.920 --> 0:10:59.480 this reason. You're speaking on another culture that you don't 0:10:59.480 --> 0:11:02.719 identify with, that you don't understand, that you haven't experienced. 0:11:03.080 --> 0:11:06.679 And this is a culture that if anything needs a platform. 0:11:06.760 --> 0:11:08.360 So if you're gonna do it, do it properly. And 0:11:08.440 --> 0:11:14.840 I broke down the right and at all at all. 0:11:14.800 --> 0:11:16.160 No, but there are you know, I'm talking about the 0:11:16.160 --> 0:11:19.360 people that call stupid lesbians and hope that we stop living. 0:11:31.840 --> 0:11:35.360 I think that for some people, their parents. There's there 0:11:35.400 --> 0:11:37.760 are a lot of parents that in our comments section 0:11:38.480 --> 0:11:42.120 who talk about how a shame they would be if 0:11:42.160 --> 0:11:47.240 we were their children, right, And I immediately think about 0:11:47.280 --> 0:11:49.720 their children when they say those things to me, or 0:11:49.720 --> 0:11:53.240 their grandchildren if they're older, and I almost feel like 0:11:53.520 --> 0:11:56.240 and and of course, like every situation is unique, and 0:11:56.360 --> 0:11:58.320 I and I don't contrary to what you said, I 0:11:58.320 --> 0:12:00.240 don't spend a lot of time doing this, but there 0:12:00.240 --> 0:12:07.800 have been moments where where I've intuitively sensed that perhaps 0:12:07.840 --> 0:12:12.240 a conversation where I can spin their perspective a little 0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:15.960 bit or introduce them to a new set of ideas 0:12:15.960 --> 0:12:19.079 that clearly they haven't been introduced to, and they see 0:12:19.320 --> 0:12:23.800 that this person that you're judging because of their sexuality. 0:12:24.160 --> 0:12:28.040 That uses an example, right, is a human is a 0:12:28.160 --> 0:12:32.480 human with thoughts and feelings who can level with you. 0:12:33.200 --> 0:12:35.400 Nine times out of ten, I've experienced that that person 0:12:35.480 --> 0:12:39.080 pulls back because I dive into the perspective of their 0:12:39.160 --> 0:12:42.800 child and what it would feel like for their child 0:12:42.920 --> 0:12:46.360 or their grandchild to be rejected by them, and what 0:12:46.520 --> 0:12:49.000 we're actually doing here. At the end of the day, 0:12:50.880 --> 0:12:55.280 I think every human being on earth understands love as 0:12:55.280 --> 0:12:59.439 a feeling, even that as a baseline thing. So if 0:12:59.480 --> 0:13:04.720 you can draw on those experiences and understand, oh, okay, 0:13:04.840 --> 0:13:08.120 maybe I can see it this way, but I've felt 0:13:08.160 --> 0:13:10.760 this way and I know what that was like. And 0:13:10.800 --> 0:13:13.640 so if I can, if I can attach that feeling 0:13:13.760 --> 0:13:15.959 to this thing that I've not experienced that I'm seeing 0:13:15.960 --> 0:13:19.640 in these strangers, now I can empathize with that experience. Right, 0:13:19.880 --> 0:13:22.959 And perhaps it's easier for me not to cast judgment 0:13:23.000 --> 0:13:27.600 because I understand it a little bit better. But ninety 0:13:27.640 --> 0:13:30.439 nine percent of the time I do follow my own advice, 0:13:30.720 --> 0:13:33.000 and I drink a glass of Vasoline, because we have 0:13:33.040 --> 0:13:35.840 this conversation all the time because you know, we read 0:13:35.840 --> 0:13:38.240 you and I always read comments. I think it's a 0:13:38.280 --> 0:13:42.800 habit that anybody who posts content online has developed, and 0:13:42.880 --> 0:13:45.520 maybe we should do some soul searching as to why 0:13:45.520 --> 0:13:49.079 we're even looking at them all the validation. 0:13:49.800 --> 0:13:52.040 I don't read them all the time, and if I do, 0:13:53.400 --> 0:13:56.760 I really like to which you can attest to. Like, 0:13:56.800 --> 0:13:59.600 there's a lot of value in not only people giving 0:13:59.640 --> 0:14:04.920 feed back, positive feedback, but also just feedback. That's good 0:14:04.960 --> 0:14:07.120 because we talk about it with so many in our 0:14:07.160 --> 0:14:11.120 line of work and in our life creators, entertainers. So 0:14:11.240 --> 0:14:13.559 much of what we do now is online or expected 0:14:13.640 --> 0:14:16.600 to be online, right, And it's kind of like your 0:14:16.679 --> 0:14:19.800 decision how private you want to be, how much you 0:14:19.840 --> 0:14:24.920 want to share. But fortunately and unfortunately, it's a way 0:14:25.040 --> 0:14:29.440 in which to have more people reach our reach, our work, 0:14:29.760 --> 0:14:33.960 reach what we do, you know, and that also exposes 0:14:34.000 --> 0:14:35.200 you a lot. 0:14:35.400 --> 0:14:38.160 I think social media for me is a mountaintop. It's 0:14:38.200 --> 0:14:42.720 like a place to shout your deepest desires and feelings 0:14:42.760 --> 0:14:46.960 and interest from. It's like I sometimes it's like a 0:14:47.000 --> 0:14:51.080 scream and to avoid Yeah, whether or not anyone is listening. 0:14:51.160 --> 0:14:54.680 I think, and honestly I want to hear from our 0:14:54.920 --> 0:14:58.360 listeners because I think an amazing episode which stems from this. 0:14:58.440 --> 0:15:00.680 But it's very different for you and media. The conversation 0:15:00.800 --> 0:15:04.520 to have is like the responsibility of how to use 0:15:04.560 --> 0:15:07.760 the internet, like for example, you know, like I know 0:15:07.840 --> 0:15:10.240 that in some places you and I disagree on, like, oh, 0:15:10.320 --> 0:15:12.080 what what do you think we should post? What do 0:15:12.080 --> 0:15:14.600 you think we should not post? You know, what do 0:15:14.640 --> 0:15:17.160 you think we should open up for people to comment about? 0:15:17.200 --> 0:15:18.760 You know? Do you post your kids? Do you not 0:15:18.840 --> 0:15:19.600 post your kids? 0:15:19.640 --> 0:15:22.040 Which is anything kids is a whole other. 0:15:23.280 --> 0:15:27.120 But anyway, back to my point, I think that opening 0:15:27.200 --> 0:15:30.800 up yourself online and reading comments is something that you 0:15:30.920 --> 0:15:35.120 need to be prepared for. And like you said, having 0:15:35.200 --> 0:15:39.960 the conversation of like do you do you read comments online? 0:15:40.640 --> 0:15:42.880 Are you able to read them and have them not 0:15:42.960 --> 0:15:46.280 affect you? So that's what I was getting, noticing that 0:15:46.360 --> 0:15:49.160 they're affecting you in a negative way. 0:15:49.240 --> 0:15:52.880 Right, So the the glass of Asolene thing is like 0:15:54.320 --> 0:15:59.560 me personally, I don't think I've ever left a comment 0:15:59.600 --> 0:16:05.760 on any one's social media post or anything to degrade 0:16:05.840 --> 0:16:10.200 their physical image. No, of course not, or even if 0:16:10.240 --> 0:16:13.640 it's like a fashion thing. Like if I see somebody 0:16:13.680 --> 0:16:17.080 and i'm you know me, am, I'm critical. I'm very critical, 0:16:17.120 --> 0:16:18.040 and I could be very mean. 0:16:18.240 --> 0:16:19.080 I understand. 0:16:19.280 --> 0:16:22.040 I was born to be on a roast panel like 0:16:22.080 --> 0:16:26.680 the things that the creativity behind my meanness is is grost. 0:16:26.880 --> 0:16:29.320 I'm so down, but I think I could be very 0:16:29.360 --> 0:16:32.640 creatively mean and I don't hold back. But I would 0:16:32.720 --> 0:16:35.400 never find myself even if I truly believed while that 0:16:35.440 --> 0:16:38.440 girl looks like shit, I would never say that. I 0:16:38.440 --> 0:16:40.600 would never, ever, ever ever say that. I would never 0:16:40.640 --> 0:16:44.000 ever It's not worth it to share that feeling, that emotion, 0:16:44.200 --> 0:16:48.160 to risk harming that person in that way. It's strange 0:16:48.200 --> 0:16:51.240 to me that people will stop and take even a 0:16:51.320 --> 0:16:55.160 second of their day to comment on somebody's appearance. I don't. 0:16:55.280 --> 0:16:57.600 I don't. That one for me is like goes right 0:16:57.640 --> 0:16:59.720 over my head. Like that one I don't understand completely. 0:17:00.080 --> 0:17:02.520 I think that's a really valuable point to dive a 0:17:02.600 --> 0:17:06.400 tiny bit deeper into, because I think the majority of 0:17:06.480 --> 0:17:09.760 the population or people that were around every day are 0:17:09.800 --> 0:17:12.600 not going to be those people that are putting a 0:17:12.640 --> 0:17:18.879 hateful comment boom out there. However, like for example, your sister, 0:17:19.400 --> 0:17:23.920 you know, my anybody in my family janew Like, I 0:17:23.960 --> 0:17:26.480 really don't think that there are very few people in 0:17:26.520 --> 0:17:29.120 your life that would actively be like, oh you look 0:17:29.200 --> 0:17:29.720 like shit. 0:17:29.600 --> 0:17:31.640 Girl, or like maybe they saw it, but they share. 0:17:32.600 --> 0:17:34.680 That's that's my follow up. I think that. 0:17:34.960 --> 0:17:37.440 I mean, my sister would definitely say it, Amber would 0:17:37.480 --> 0:17:38.359 definitely say it. 0:17:38.400 --> 0:17:42.840 No, But I'm saying, like, to really hurt somebody somebody's page, Like, 0:17:42.920 --> 0:17:45.960 sometimes I'll open up somebody's page that I admire and 0:17:46.040 --> 0:17:48.760 for no reason, there's people having a whole discourse under 0:17:48.760 --> 0:17:51.840 the page. And I think that also sometimes people, depending 0:17:51.840 --> 0:17:53.840 on who it is that they're commenting on, they're thinking 0:17:53.880 --> 0:17:55.320 this person isn't going to see it. 0:17:55.560 --> 0:17:56.600 Or maybe they want them to. 0:17:57.040 --> 0:17:58.960 Well, my point is that I don't think that there's 0:17:59.000 --> 0:18:02.280 a lot of people out there that are making it 0:18:02.480 --> 0:18:06.879 normal to be cyber bullying or just commenting hate online 0:18:07.000 --> 0:18:09.920 or sending hate. But the ones that do do it, 0:18:10.640 --> 0:18:13.680 they stick out a lot. Number one, And you think 0:18:13.680 --> 0:18:16.159 about it a lot, because if you took the time to, 0:18:16.400 --> 0:18:19.280 like you said, post it, think about it, type it, 0:18:20.280 --> 0:18:24.320 you know, go through with putting it online, then you 0:18:24.400 --> 0:18:27.880 really you have That's a very complex thing. 0:18:27.920 --> 0:18:30.000 Right, So I think it's I think those are easy. 0:18:30.040 --> 0:18:33.320 It's very complex thing, and some people, unfortunately are just 0:18:33.359 --> 0:18:38.920 not are just not well, And it's easy to take 0:18:38.960 --> 0:18:42.919 out your frustrations or your angers, or your issues on 0:18:43.160 --> 0:18:47.680 something completely intangible that you don't associate with being a real, living, 0:18:47.800 --> 0:18:52.200 breathing other person, even in cases of children, because now 0:18:52.400 --> 0:18:55.399 just cyber I think about the children so so much 0:18:56.119 --> 0:19:00.000 in schools. How much have we been hearing about cyber bullying, 0:19:00.000 --> 0:19:03.920 about how many children's lives are lost because instead of 0:19:04.040 --> 0:19:08.720 just look, I was bullied in school. I know, and 0:19:08.800 --> 0:19:11.960 to this day, you know, my parents have both both 0:19:12.000 --> 0:19:14.200 said to me, you know, why didn't you feel comfortable 0:19:14.240 --> 0:19:17.480 to share? It's like I was ashamed, you know, you don't. 0:19:17.560 --> 0:19:19.919 You don't want to seem like that kid that's weak 0:19:19.960 --> 0:19:22.480 and gets picked on. And then the people that you 0:19:22.520 --> 0:19:26.240 love worry about your experience in school and it was 0:19:26.359 --> 0:19:28.760 very different. You know, one time I was glued to 0:19:28.800 --> 0:19:32.359 a chair, you know, and you think about it, it's like, 0:19:32.400 --> 0:19:37.040 oh haha, but it feels terrible. I can't imagine. Now 0:19:37.840 --> 0:19:40.520 I think about the young people in our lives that 0:19:40.560 --> 0:19:45.159 I love, you know, and I think about them potentially 0:19:45.200 --> 0:19:51.760 receiving graphic information, graphic visuals that can really impact you, 0:19:51.960 --> 0:19:56.000 oh for sure, and stay with you give people PTSD 0:19:56.560 --> 0:20:00.160 you know, and gosh, even which this has happened to me, 0:20:00.080 --> 0:20:05.639 even unwanted photos from excess. In a way, your phone, 0:20:05.720 --> 0:20:09.480 your email, Instagram, that's in a way access to you. 0:20:09.520 --> 0:20:12.560 It's an extension. It is absolutely And you have the 0:20:12.720 --> 0:20:16.240 choice with some things whether to open a message or 0:20:16.560 --> 0:20:21.480 go into the DM or whatnot. But sometimes you don't 0:20:21.480 --> 0:20:25.560 have a choice, or you don't realize what the content 0:20:25.680 --> 0:20:28.560 or the material is and you open it. I'll give 0:20:28.560 --> 0:20:30.840 you an example so it's clear. One time on my 0:20:30.960 --> 0:20:35.560 Facebook there was a guy who started off just sending 0:20:36.119 --> 0:20:38.080 you know, oh you love your music, love your this. 0:20:38.440 --> 0:20:42.119 Then it turned into pictures of him. Then really quickly 0:20:42.200 --> 0:20:45.240 it turned into him pleasing himself, like videos of him 0:20:45.240 --> 0:20:47.200 pleasing himself, very graphic. 0:20:47.680 --> 0:20:49.040 And he would send them to you. 0:20:49.359 --> 0:20:52.080 Yeah, but I didn't know any of that was there. Actually, 0:20:52.119 --> 0:20:54.280 it wasn't me that found them. It was my mom 0:20:54.320 --> 0:20:59.320 and Heather and they're like, oh my god, and listen, 0:20:59.440 --> 0:21:02.159 that's that's jarring, that's horrible. You don't want to be 0:21:02.280 --> 0:21:05.520 faced with pornographic content. You don't want to see from 0:21:05.560 --> 0:21:07.920 somebody who's actively purposefully sending it. 0:21:07.960 --> 0:21:10.119 I think I've ever heard a single person say m 0:21:10.480 --> 0:21:13.840 yay dick pic no ever no. 0:21:13.920 --> 0:21:17.359 But also I'm saying, somebody that purposefully sends it to you, 0:21:17.400 --> 0:21:19.760 then you can imagine what the is with the intention 0:21:19.960 --> 0:21:21.440 of you or some weird. 0:21:22.040 --> 0:21:24.600 I'm sure they don't send it hoping that you'd be disgusted, 0:21:24.680 --> 0:21:27.200 but that's not I don't think that's so much the point. 0:21:28.200 --> 0:21:30.600 I think that I think some people say really mean 0:21:30.680 --> 0:21:34.800 things with the complete opposite intention, not even to actually 0:21:34.840 --> 0:21:38.920 harm you, but desperate for you to notice them. And 0:21:39.240 --> 0:21:40.720 we were talking about it the other day, and I 0:21:40.720 --> 0:21:43.600 think that probably sparked this idea that we've had people 0:21:43.640 --> 0:21:47.760 in our in our comments or in our dms say nasty, 0:21:47.960 --> 0:21:51.520 nasty shit, and then you go to respond and they're like, 0:21:51.560 --> 0:21:53.399 oh my god, I can't you know, I can't believe 0:21:53.400 --> 0:21:55.800 you responded. I love your music. I didn't think that 0:21:55.840 --> 0:22:00.160 you would see this. You know, It's which one is it? 0:22:00.200 --> 0:22:02.480 Did you? Did you do it because you wanted my 0:22:02.600 --> 0:22:05.400 attention or you did it because and now you're you're 0:22:05.440 --> 0:22:08.080 back pedaling because you realize that you know there's actually 0:22:08.080 --> 0:22:10.480 a human being on the other side of your nasty words. 0:22:10.520 --> 0:22:14.920 But that's actually happened to me in person before. What Yeah, 0:22:14.960 --> 0:22:17.879 I told you that lady that saw my ID and 0:22:17.920 --> 0:22:20.280 she's like, oh, what a shame, like you look so 0:22:20.359 --> 0:22:22.960