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Speaker 1: Edge Martinez in Real Life podcast. I mean it's a

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Speaker 1: leader kid.

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Speaker 2: What is this space?

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Speaker 1: Welcome to my space today, Welcome to the podcast. Thank you,

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Speaker 1: thank you my Little I r L Podcast. I love it.

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Speaker 2: I love talking to you. I love your energy everything,

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Speaker 2: your energy, that's the that's something that's so special. So yes,

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Speaker 2: I do love it and congratulate.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, baby, congratulations to you. First of all, we're

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Speaker 1: gonna start with you. I am excited about my podcast.

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Speaker 1: But first and foremost, last night, m I wish there

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Speaker 1: was somebody in the room who could just testify to

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Speaker 1: what I saw last night, Which is your new Well?

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Speaker 1: What are you the executive producer play? What is it?

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Speaker 2: What is the First of all, it's a musical.

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Speaker 1: That's a musical.

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Speaker 2: I would be the lead producer for the musical that

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Speaker 2: also be the composer, and I'd also be the conceptualizer

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Speaker 2: of this and subject correct it is it is? It

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Speaker 2: is loosely based on my experiences growing up in New York.

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Speaker 1: The whole thing is so good. I can't I want

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Speaker 1: to talk about it more and more like specific, but

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Speaker 1: it took me immediately to little Baby, Young Alicia. A

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Speaker 1: diary is on twenty years on twenty year anniversary. My

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Speaker 1: son is twenty. This is nuts. So it's like, Diary

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Speaker 1: is in college right now, Diary is going to college.

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Speaker 1: Oh it's been in college thirty year in college. Diary

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Speaker 1: is graduating college next year. Whoa I know? Are you

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Speaker 1: like a whole different person from them?

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Speaker 2: Definitely, I'm a new person, of course. Of course I've

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Speaker 2: grown so much. I know so much. I was for

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Speaker 2: sure a baby. I was so I was definitely entering

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Speaker 2: my beginnings of my womanhood. But I was still so insecure,

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Speaker 2: so vulnerable were you?

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Speaker 1: You never gave that.

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Speaker 2: You always showed up like that was my trick. Yeah

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Speaker 2: that was wasn't it yours?

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Speaker 1: It still is what I mean, I still show up

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Speaker 1: when I mean, I am more centered and I do

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Speaker 1: have more sense of purpose. So that gives you confidence,

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Speaker 1: and that gives you you know, and so I can

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Speaker 1: block out noise better. But I still have moments of like,

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Speaker 1: you know, totally thousand, you got to still show We

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Speaker 1: know how to show up, but we need to show up.

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Speaker 1: We still have moments. Yes, you all the way got

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Speaker 1: it together.

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Speaker 2: No, nobody all the way has it together. And every

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Speaker 2: day is different, you know what I mean? But I

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Speaker 2: definitely have it together more than I had it together. Yes,

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Speaker 2: so thank god, please we need to grow somehow.

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Speaker 1: What do you think the biggest difference is, though?

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Speaker 2: What do you think the biggest difference is that at

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Speaker 2: that time, I really felt like I had to be

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Speaker 2: validated by people. I felt like I had to be accepted,

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Speaker 2: you know, people had to agree with me or I

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Speaker 2: had to people had to accept what I thought for

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Speaker 2: it to be good. And now I don't, you know, you.

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Speaker 1: Look for opinions from everybody.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, yeah, I was the union seekert.

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Speaker 1: What do you think?

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Speaker 2: Do you like it? Do you like it? Do you

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Speaker 2: like it? Do you like it? Do you like it?

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Speaker 2: Do you like it? And if they didn't, if enough

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Speaker 2: people liked it, I liked it. If enough people didn't

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Speaker 2: like it, I also didn't like it, you know. And

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Speaker 2: it's like at some point you got to like, think

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Speaker 2: what you think and feel how you feel, and you

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Speaker 2: got to stand behind it and stand for it. And

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Speaker 2: you know, so that's well, that's what I think is

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Speaker 2: the biggest difference for me now.

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Speaker 1: Was there's ever some amazing song that everybody didn't like

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Speaker 1: and you knew it was great and you never put

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Speaker 1: it out and left us in the it's still sitting

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Speaker 1: in a vault somewhere.

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Speaker 2: I would no, I don't know. I mean maybe, but

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Speaker 2: people did feel that way about falling, believe it or not.

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Speaker 2: What do you mean people didn't understand falling at first?

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Speaker 2: These people which people I'm just saying, where I'm telling.

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Speaker 1: These people, these people, where are they? Can we call

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Speaker 1: them now? Put them on the screen and see, didn't

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Speaker 1: you like label people are like friends or what?

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Speaker 2: I think that. I think probably I would if I

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Speaker 2: would bring it back to it, I would definitely say

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Speaker 2: it was more on the label side or on the

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Speaker 2: business side. You know, it was a it was a

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Speaker 2: risk if you think, if you think about it, falling

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Speaker 2: was actually a risk. It didn't fit into the style

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Speaker 2: of music that was happening at the time, and it

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Speaker 2: was it was different. I mean most of my music

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Speaker 2: is always different. With Diary Realisia Keys, it was you

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Speaker 2: don't know my name. That was a risk. You don't

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Speaker 2: know my name wasn't like the sound at the time.

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Speaker 1: It was was the sound at the time. I don't

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Speaker 1: remember the like a I don't know, I don't even.

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Speaker 2: Know what was that. But the point is is you know,

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Speaker 2: I think that a lot of times, you know, people

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Speaker 2: like to do and encourage you to do what's already

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Speaker 2: been done. M It's like rare that people will tell you, hey,

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Speaker 2: take a take a chance, try something new, try something different.

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Speaker 2: It's very rare that people get behind that mentality. But

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Speaker 2: but I'm glad that I was never you know, I

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Speaker 2: always went with what felt good in my heart, and

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Speaker 2: that's always been my guiding.

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Speaker 1: Like, yeah, thank god. Some opinions are everywhere.

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Speaker 2: Wow, especially now I'm more than ever. I don't even

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Speaker 2: know how kids function today.

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Speaker 1: I wondered that for you, cause you still are very

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Speaker 1: active and you very like even in socials and stuff,

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Speaker 1: you engage. You share, right, share a lot. Yes, your

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Speaker 1: family is Swiss. Swiss is always sharing something.

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Speaker 2: The sharer of all sharers.

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Speaker 1: I feel like he probably pushes you to share more

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Speaker 1: than you would have had you, guys not been a couple.

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Speaker 2: I think he's he's actually really good at it, you know.

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Speaker 2: I think that the way that he does it and

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Speaker 2: the way that he shares is so genuine, and he

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Speaker 2: shares like what feels right, and it really does feel right,

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Speaker 2: and it feels unique and it feels like special. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: so he's really good at it. Yeah. I hit him

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Speaker 2: a lot, like, d what do you think about this?

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Speaker 2: He'd like, nah, not that. I was like, Okay, he

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Speaker 2: was there last night at the Hell's Kitchen.

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Speaker 1: He was so proud of you, and Genesis was there.

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Speaker 1: He loves the git, just the musical.

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Speaker 2: This was the first time Genesis saw the show, and

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Speaker 2: you know, he's so upset that I have to go,

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Speaker 2: and you know it's in New York and to make

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Speaker 2: to travel and to always be there to make sure

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Speaker 2: it's perfect. And so one day he was like, you

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Speaker 2: don't even want to spend time with your kids. All

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Speaker 2: you want to do is go to your stupid play.

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Speaker 2: And I was like, hey, that's not nice, man. I

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Speaker 2: don't call any of your things stupid. And so he

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Speaker 2: was like, well, that's all you want to do, And

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Speaker 2: I said, I know that you just miss me. I

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Speaker 2: know that's what that means. You want me to stay

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Speaker 2: and I want to stay too, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 2: But I'm really proud of what I'm working on and

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Speaker 2: you'll see, you'll see how much you're gonna like it.

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Speaker 2: So when he came yesterday, it was the first time

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Speaker 2: that he saw it after feeling, you know that the

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Speaker 2: normal feelings that a kid feels when you have to

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Speaker 2: let your parents go. You know, it's hard. And when

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Speaker 2: he was there and just rivet in and just looking

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Speaker 2: at every question, mam, when's the mother coming back? Ma,

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Speaker 2: when's the He had thousands of questions. Swiss was like,

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Speaker 2: if he don't be quiet, came to him to be

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Speaker 2: quiet because he's loud.

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Speaker 1: He's so in to you though, like I saw a

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Speaker 1: little video of him protecting you at the concert, your security.

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Speaker 1: And then there was another one. Well, he didn't want

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Speaker 1: you to show too much boob, and that's pretty good

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Speaker 1: that Your favorite was, I do this? Mom?

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Speaker 2: What's what's wrong? The heart? It's cool? So everybody can

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Speaker 2: see your boots? Can't your heart? I've never seen somebody

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Speaker 2: do that. Well, you're only eight. The worst is gonna

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Speaker 2: be a tiss.

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Speaker 1: Okay, how about we do this? How well we do this?

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Speaker 2: You do the time? It's boos everyone has.

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Speaker 1: Pretty so much because I'm pasty and You're like, it's

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Speaker 1: just a boob.

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Speaker 2: I was like, it's okay. He's like, ma, are we.

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Speaker 1: Really gonna do this?

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Speaker 2: Mom? Are we doing this?

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Speaker 1: What is that? Who is that? That's what who is history.

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Speaker 2: He's not protecting. Dad always says you protect the mom, right.

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Speaker 2: He takes it serious clearly.

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Speaker 1: So cute.

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Speaker 2: It's such a cute kid.

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Speaker 1: It sounds like you're like a great mom. So how

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Speaker 1: is that like we should talk about the parenting? Part

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Speaker 1: of that is that I know we've talked since you've

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Speaker 1: been a mom, but now you're like a seasoned mom.

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Speaker 2: I feel like, you know, you have two ever a

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Speaker 2: you know, I think are you ever a seasoned mom?

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Speaker 2: You definitely have more experience, for sure, But I feel

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Speaker 2: like it's constantly a conundrum, don't you. It's like constantly

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Speaker 2: something that you're bumping up against, something you haven't quite

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Speaker 2: been with before. And even if I've been through it

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Speaker 2: with Egypt, I haven't like Genesis way of expressing. It's

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Speaker 2: so different. And even all the kids, like I've always

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Speaker 2: felt blessed because together we have five kids, and so

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Speaker 2: I have like older kids that I've experienced what it's

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Speaker 2: gonna be like, Okay, this is how sixteen's gonna be

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Speaker 2: or this is what thirteen is gonna be like Now

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Speaker 2: Egypt's thirteen, and it's a little different. So I don't

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Speaker 2: know if you're ever a seasoned, but I do feel

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Speaker 2: a lot more. I just feel a lot more like

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Speaker 2: aware of how I want to talk with them and

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Speaker 2: express with them and things like that.

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Speaker 1: No, and then also, they're not the same person who

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Speaker 1: they are two years from now. So you think you

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Speaker 1: got them down, you know how to manage them, and

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Speaker 1: then they become somebody else in a couple of years

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Speaker 1: and you have to kind of.

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Speaker 2: Read learn and then so are you like I'm also

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Speaker 2: another person.

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Speaker 1: Because mothers are actually pain so human. We are also

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Speaker 1: people evolving. This is absolutely true.

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Speaker 2: So to kind of put that all together is it's amazing.

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Speaker 2: And I mean sometimes there's so much going on and

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Speaker 2: I need bed at a certain time and I need

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Speaker 2: to make sure the homework is at this time, and

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Speaker 2: then we're there. They're sitting there doing something and they're

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Speaker 2: cracking up laughing, and I'm like, I need you, And

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Speaker 2: I look back on it and I'm like, why didn't

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Speaker 2: I just laugh too? Could I just have laughed too?

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Speaker 2: And then we'd have just got on with it like

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Speaker 2: I made it. They almost took take longer to just

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Speaker 2: so it's like, y, yeah, I think you kind of

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Speaker 2: look at yourself too, and you realize how you can

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Speaker 2: kind of let certain things go or whatever you need

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Speaker 2: to do.

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Speaker 1: Do you let your kids see you vulnerable? Like I

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Speaker 1: had this who was it?

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Speaker 2: Uh? Oh?

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Speaker 1: We had Kelly uh Clarkson on the show and she

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Speaker 1: went through a divorce and she was talking about, you know,

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Speaker 1: she went through a really hard time and she let

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Speaker 1: her kids, she let sh not too much, but just

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Speaker 1: enough so that she would explain, mommy sad. And yeah,

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Speaker 1: she operates on the some some parents don't. Some parents

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Speaker 1: believe in like shielding shielding. Yeah, and there's like a

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Speaker 1: fine line, I guess, but are you, like, how are

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Speaker 1: you with these seems like you would be leaning towards vulnerable.

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Speaker 2: Feel like it's really important to be able to learn

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Speaker 2: how to have relationships with your emotions, you know. And

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Speaker 2: I think especially as boys, we a lot of times

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Speaker 2: we make boys have to be so like teflon and

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Speaker 2: and we think that that's what how a man expresses

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Speaker 2: or how a boy expresses. And I do think that

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Speaker 2: for all of us, cause I think as women as well,

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Speaker 2: we also feel like we have to be tough. Alon,

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Speaker 2: we gotta put on the armor and no, let's not

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Speaker 2: get penetrated. And I think that that develops a unhealthy

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Speaker 2: relationship with our emotions. We can't access them. And I

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Speaker 2: personally went through that. I experience that way. I just

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Speaker 2: could not access my emotions. I did not know how

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Speaker 2: to share what I actually felt truly. I knew how

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Speaker 2: to share the like version of it, that was the words,

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Speaker 2: you know, but I couldn't properly truly express it in

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Speaker 2: a way that felt as raw as I felt it

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Speaker 2: on the inside. And I thought that that I had

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Speaker 2: to learn how to practice to put to words my

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Speaker 2: real feelings as opposed to holding the men. And so

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Speaker 2: I really feel like getting having a relationship with your

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Speaker 2: emotions is important. Yeah, I'm not overly emotional, so you know,

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Speaker 2: I think that's just natural balance that I have. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: but the other day I did I boohooed in the

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Speaker 2: Carbon Genesis. He looked at me like you had to

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Speaker 2: see his face. He was like, I'm sorry that I

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Speaker 2: didn't do another and I should have been more. And

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Speaker 2: I really apologized for and he instantly. And I was

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Speaker 2: not doing that for him to feel bad or to

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Speaker 2: have to apologize to me, But it just was how

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Speaker 2: I felt, and it just was like I was overwhelmed

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Speaker 2: at the moment he was like, I never saw you

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Speaker 2: cry like that before, man, And next ten days after

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Speaker 2: my remer, when you just started crying, like I never

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Speaker 2: saw you cry like that before. It and it and

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Speaker 2: it touched him, and I think that, you know, that's

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Speaker 2: a part of that's a part of just irl my

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Speaker 2: real life and it happens.

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Speaker 1: What could trigger something like that, is that a bad day?

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Speaker 1: Is that some is that I.

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Speaker 2: Was personally overwhelmed. Actually for him, I felt like there

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Speaker 2: was a lot of things going on that I was

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Speaker 2: just needing to come to terms with, like with school

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Speaker 2: and some different things, and I just felt like I

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Speaker 2: was uncomfortable with where it was circling and I felt

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Speaker 2: out of control. I felt like I was not able

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Speaker 2: to have a handle on it to the way that

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Speaker 2: I wanted to. And to see him feel uncomfortable about

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Speaker 2: certain things made me uncomfortable. And when I couldn't kind

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Speaker 2: of get it under control, it just like I was like,

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Speaker 2: I don't have control of this. Yeah, And it just

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Speaker 2: kind of like felt, you know, overwhelming in that way,

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Speaker 2: and I just I don't know, it just came out,

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Speaker 2: oh you know what I mean, It just came out.

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Speaker 1: And he just adores you too. So he was probably like,

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Speaker 1: what it's happening.

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Speaker 2: He was like, whoa hoo, whoa whoa, whoa whoa whoa.

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Speaker 2: But and then man, it's crazy how the emotions that

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Speaker 2: we feel for them. Wow, like you never know, it's

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Speaker 2: super wild.

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Speaker 1: I was just talking about that, and I was telling

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Speaker 1: you this before. You're not ready for when they have

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Speaker 1: to go.

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Speaker 2: Mmm, I'm not ready.

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Speaker 1: Have you prepared at all?

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Speaker 2: I'm not ready. It's okay, Sorry, I'm not ready. Tell

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Speaker 2: me how it goes.

293
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Speaker 1: I'm to tell you how it goes.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, how does it go?

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Speaker 1: I was fully depressed for six months before he left

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Speaker 1: for college because I was preparing mentally, preparing myself to

297
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Speaker 1: be like I just was so sad, you know, it

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Speaker 1: was just him and I for a while. Then I

299
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Speaker 1: my bonus baby came in and we have I have

300
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Speaker 1: two there, but the idea of like my first born,

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Speaker 1: my baby, like leaving was traumatic for me. So for

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Speaker 1: six months I was super depressed before he left. And

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Speaker 1: then I was telling my girlfriend. I think it was

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Speaker 1: you know, Shaka pill Girl. I was telling Shaka I

305
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Speaker 1: was like, oh god, he's I got to take him

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Speaker 1: to school. I'm going to be a mess. I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: cry when I drop him off. She was like, no,

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Speaker 1: you're not. I was like, what do you mean, No,

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Speaker 1: I'm not, Yes, i am. I'm very emotional about this.

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Speaker 1: She was like, imagine how for him, like going into

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Speaker 1: a new space, new school, all this about how challenging

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Speaker 1: that is for him. Why do you want to make

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Speaker 1: that more dramatic? And I was like, oh, you're right.

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Speaker 1: He was not a good friend. And so then I

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Speaker 1: just kind of held myself together. I went there, we

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Speaker 1: set him up, we set the room, and I left

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Speaker 1: and I realized though, so after that, I realized, they

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Speaker 1: don't leave you. They're still there.

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Speaker 2: All the time.

320
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Speaker 1: Yeah, like he's still.

321
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Speaker 2: Asking you for a thousand things all the time.

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Speaker 1: It's cool, it's fine, No, they don't. There's still your children.

323
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Speaker 1: But so maybe you won't be sad for six months,

324
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Speaker 1: maybe yours will be three months now, two months, knowing

325
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Speaker 1: that it'll be okay. On the other side, I.

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Speaker 2: Do know it'll be okay. But it's a big change. Man.

327
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Speaker 2: It's like you literally hold them. They can't do anything

328
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Speaker 2: without you. You have to. You plan your entire existence,

329
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Speaker 2: every move you make around them being good. And then

330
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Speaker 2: they don't need you, and it's kind of kind of crazy,

331
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Speaker 2: it's kind of fucked, it's kind of crazy. But they

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Speaker 2: do need you know.

333
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Speaker 1: They always do know, they always do it, and I.

334
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Speaker 2: Think whatever, they need to call you and make sure

335
00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:30,200
Speaker 2: you know and just like, yeah, the mama, there's only

336
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Speaker 2: one mama.

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Speaker 1: People don't talking up about too, Like the partner you

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Speaker 1: choose and how you parent together. Did you have any

339
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Speaker 1: challenges with that or are you just kind of in

340
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Speaker 1: line with that or how do you guys manage that?

341
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Speaker 2: I feel like we do really well. We're really we're

342
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Speaker 2: really in a beautiful sink just naturally, like our flow

343
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Speaker 2: has a good sink. And I think that on the

344
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Speaker 2: parenting side, he's really good at you know, he definitely

345
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Speaker 2: knows when it's time to step in because he's like, mm,

346
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Speaker 2: you know what, they need some dad energy. Sometimes you

347
00:16:04,040 --> 00:16:06,680
Speaker 2: need dad energy. Yes, But he's really good at, like

348
00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:10,760
Speaker 2: at being we are really good at being kind of

349
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Speaker 2: a a good flow, like what's gonna work best for

350
00:16:13,760 --> 00:16:17,720
Speaker 2: this particular inner, this child, cause each one's so different,

351
00:16:17,720 --> 00:16:19,520
Speaker 2: so you can't just like do the same thing all

352
00:16:19,560 --> 00:16:21,720
Speaker 2: the time for sure. So I think we're good at

353
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Speaker 2: kind of that flow. And I think he's he knows

354
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Speaker 2: that I have great instincts there too, and so he's like, well,

355
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Speaker 2: what do you what do you think? And if I

356
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Speaker 2: say listen, I re I know your your normal instinct

357
00:16:30,600 --> 00:16:34,000
Speaker 2: would be this, the less approach like this, yeah, and

358
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Speaker 2: he'll be open for it.

359
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Speaker 1: Do you ever bump pets? Do you ever disagree I'm parenting?

360
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Speaker 1: And how do you manage that?

361
00:16:39,280 --> 00:16:39,920
Speaker 2: Everybody does?

362
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Speaker 1: So you can't tell me you don't we we?

363
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Speaker 2: I was trying to think of, like, how ah ah

364
00:16:43,800 --> 00:16:47,080
Speaker 2: a time? Yeah, I think we definitely. I think it's

365
00:16:47,120 --> 00:16:51,640
Speaker 2: more about communicating about our own needs, cause I think

366
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Speaker 2: sometimes you spend so much time making sure the kids

367
00:16:55,680 --> 00:16:58,360
Speaker 2: needs are met that you do have to make sure

368
00:16:58,400 --> 00:17:03,800
Speaker 2: that the relationship between the kids and the parents don't

369
00:17:03,960 --> 00:17:07,680
Speaker 2: eliminate the parents' needs, you know what I mean? And

370
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Speaker 2: so I think in those ways are the ways that

371
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Speaker 2: we're communicative. And it's like, I'm noticing this pattern and

372
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Speaker 2: it's starting to feel uncomfortable. Mm, what should we what

373
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Speaker 2: should we do?

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Speaker 1: How did you learn to do that? You grew up

375
00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:23,960
Speaker 1: in it w with just your mom? Yeah, so who

376
00:17:24,040 --> 00:17:24,600
Speaker 1: taught you that?

377
00:17:25,040 --> 00:17:29,840
Speaker 2: Right? What did your therapy? I honestly haven't really. Uh

378
00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:33,560
Speaker 2: I did like a life coach thing that was helpful, helpful.

379
00:17:33,240 --> 00:17:38,159
Speaker 1: Okay, what's the biggest yes, whatever, It's.

380
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Speaker 2: Like I might be a life I feel like I

381
00:17:40,640 --> 00:17:45,000
Speaker 2: could be a life function in some way. But but yeah, no,

382
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Speaker 2: I think that I think that. Uh, I don't know.

383
00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:53,760
Speaker 2: I think maybe just just recognizing how when you can

384
00:17:54,040 --> 00:17:57,160
Speaker 2: express Again, I think it comes back to me not

385
00:17:57,240 --> 00:18:00,359
Speaker 2: having a great connection with my own emotions. And so

386
00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:03,160
Speaker 2: when I started to realize how toxic that could be.

387
00:18:03,640 --> 00:18:04,240
Speaker 1: What does that mean?

388
00:18:04,280 --> 00:18:04,440
Speaker 2: Though?

389
00:18:04,480 --> 00:18:05,960
Speaker 1: Exactly? Like what is it?

390
00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:09,280
Speaker 2: So what I was saying was thank you. Remember I

391
00:18:09,320 --> 00:18:11,159
Speaker 2: was talking before, and I was saying like I was

392
00:18:11,200 --> 00:18:14,640
Speaker 2: such a pleaser that I was disconnected to how I

393
00:18:14,720 --> 00:18:17,520
Speaker 2: actually felt. And so I would be so like, well,

394
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Speaker 2: what do they like? What do they think? Is this

395
00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:22,959
Speaker 2: good for you know, whatever choice I'm making in my career.

396
00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:24,560
Speaker 2: Oh they approve of that.

397
00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:25,919
Speaker 1: Oh they like.

398
00:18:26,080 --> 00:18:28,640
Speaker 2: The thing I did, the thing I wore, the thing

399
00:18:28,720 --> 00:18:32,040
Speaker 2: I said, or whatever. And I would be so outwardly

400
00:18:32,440 --> 00:18:35,720
Speaker 2: that I noticed that that became toxic because I didn't

401
00:18:35,760 --> 00:18:38,560
Speaker 2: have a relationship with myself to be able to say, no,

402
00:18:38,720 --> 00:18:42,520
Speaker 2: here's what I feel, here's what I actually feel. Just

403
00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:44,199
Speaker 2: this is what I feel. I don't know. You might

404
00:18:44,240 --> 00:18:46,479
Speaker 2: hate what I feel, but I feel this and to

405
00:18:46,520 --> 00:18:49,399
Speaker 2: actually be able to verbalize and say that wasn't so

406
00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:51,560
Speaker 2: easy for me. So I started to practice that more.

407
00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:54,240
Speaker 2: And because of that practice, that's what starts to make

408
00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:57,359
Speaker 2: I think Swiss and I even more able to communicate

409
00:18:57,400 --> 00:18:59,560
Speaker 2: better because I was able to say, no, this is

410
00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:01,919
Speaker 2: how I feel, and I know it's important. If I

411
00:19:01,920 --> 00:19:03,720
Speaker 2: don't tell you how I feel, and if you don't

412
00:19:03,720 --> 00:19:06,359
Speaker 2: tell me how you feel, that's when it doesn't It

413
00:19:06,480 --> 00:19:08,800
Speaker 2: just goes wrong. So that part, I think God has

414
00:19:08,840 --> 00:19:09,680
Speaker 2: to be able to communicate.

415
00:19:09,720 --> 00:19:11,240
Speaker 1: That's dope because a lot of people do that. I

416
00:19:11,240 --> 00:19:14,199
Speaker 1: think that's a pretty common thing to do, is like

417
00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:16,639
Speaker 1: bury how you feel and have confidence in it and

418
00:19:16,680 --> 00:19:19,680
Speaker 1: also feeling like you trust somebody to give them all

419
00:19:19,720 --> 00:19:21,719
Speaker 1: of that. But what is the practice of that? How

420
00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:22,639
Speaker 1: do you snap out of that?

421
00:19:23,119 --> 00:19:25,359
Speaker 2: For me? I think the practice because this is what

422
00:19:25,440 --> 00:19:27,080
Speaker 2: I think. For me, that's what happened. I don't know

423
00:19:27,160 --> 00:19:29,000
Speaker 2: it happens. I don't know how it goes for you,

424
00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:32,840
Speaker 2: but like I might find myself in a conversation. Yeah,

425
00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:37,320
Speaker 2: and everyone's different. Some people react right away, some people

426
00:19:37,359 --> 00:19:40,640
Speaker 2: need to digest things. You know, everybody's different, right, Yeah,

427
00:19:40,720 --> 00:19:42,800
Speaker 2: I find myself whatever the case, I find myself in

428
00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:46,440
Speaker 2: a conversation, someone says something to me and my stomach goes.

429
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Speaker 1: M oh, I don't like that.

430
00:19:48,240 --> 00:19:51,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, and something I'm like, ooh, whatever the way they

431
00:19:51,359 --> 00:19:53,399
Speaker 2: said that like that? That didn't feel right for me?

432
00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:55,480
Speaker 2: What did that mean? But why would they have said

433
00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:57,760
Speaker 2: it like that? Why did it feel like they referenced

434
00:19:57,840 --> 00:20:00,520
Speaker 2: back something old that we already said, but it came

435
00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:04,200
Speaker 2: back whatever it might be now in that moment, maybe

436
00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:06,920
Speaker 2: I don't bring it up. Maybe I'm just like listening

437
00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:08,639
Speaker 2: or I felt it, but I didn't wanna make it

438
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:11,960
Speaker 2: a big deal. We're at a thing whatever. But if

439
00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:15,320
Speaker 2: I have felt that that that zing, then I make

440
00:20:15,359 --> 00:20:17,679
Speaker 2: it a point to come back to that m and

441
00:20:17,760 --> 00:20:19,560
Speaker 2: I will say, hey can I can I talk with

442
00:20:19,640 --> 00:20:21,720
Speaker 2: you? You know, we were talking the other day and you

443
00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:24,720
Speaker 2: you said and it just felt like you were like

444
00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:27,800
Speaker 2: coming at me and it didn't feel right, And I

445
00:20:27,880 --> 00:20:29,600
Speaker 2: just wanted to ask you, like, what did you mean?

446
00:20:29,680 --> 00:20:33,080
Speaker 2: Because maybe I read it wrong. I don't wanna take

447
00:20:33,080 --> 00:20:35,560
Speaker 2: it out of context. How what did what made you

448
00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:37,960
Speaker 2: say that? And then they can have a place to

449
00:20:37,960 --> 00:20:39,879
Speaker 2: speak to me about it, and I give a place

450
00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:41,919
Speaker 2: to But I found in the past I would just

451
00:20:42,720 --> 00:20:46,040
Speaker 2: hold it, feel it, and then you know, create potential

452
00:20:46,040 --> 00:20:49,080
Speaker 2: resentment or whatever. Yeah, over something that I don't even

453
00:20:49,080 --> 00:20:50,280
Speaker 2: know if that's exactly what they meant.

454
00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:53,000
Speaker 1: That's so good, I think sometimes I I think I

455
00:20:53,040 --> 00:20:55,800
Speaker 1: do that sometimes. But I think sometimes what happens is I,

456
00:20:55,840 --> 00:20:57,320
Speaker 1: like you say, I hold I might not do it

457
00:20:57,400 --> 00:20:59,439
Speaker 1: right there, but then I'm over it, and so then

458
00:20:59,440 --> 00:21:01,800
Speaker 1: I don't say anything, which is not always good either.

459
00:21:01,840 --> 00:21:03,879
Speaker 1: Sometimes I just kind of blow past things. And I

460
00:21:03,880 --> 00:21:06,040
Speaker 1: think you're right. I think you have to get to it.

461
00:21:06,119 --> 00:21:08,520
Speaker 2: And obviously it depends on who is that, like joh

462
00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:11,240
Speaker 2: okay whatever, who cares exactly have to pay attention to

463
00:21:11,280 --> 00:21:13,440
Speaker 2: that we can move on. But if it's somebody who

464
00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:17,320
Speaker 2: like really plays an important part in your life, yeah,

465
00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:20,000
Speaker 2: you know, I think it's that. So that's the type

466
00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:21,960
Speaker 2: of practice I started to do. That started to get

467
00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:24,040
Speaker 2: me more comfortable with being able to share.

468
00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:27,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's good. That's that's a good practice, right, Yeah,

469
00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:28,639
Speaker 1: And it's healthy.

470
00:21:28,800 --> 00:21:31,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I free the same thing because I kind

471
00:21:31,119 --> 00:21:33,440
Speaker 2: of I can let things roll off my back. I'm

472
00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:35,520
Speaker 2: not very like I don't hold on this stuff and

473
00:21:35,560 --> 00:21:39,600
Speaker 2: hard and stuff. So I think, but then time's coming.

474
00:21:39,680 --> 00:21:41,800
Speaker 2: You realize stuff is coming up for you and you're like, ooh,

475
00:21:41,840 --> 00:21:44,679
Speaker 2: I'm mad. But I didn't think I was like mad.

476
00:21:45,119 --> 00:21:47,200
Speaker 2: I thought it was fine, but it wasn't.

477
00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:51,600
Speaker 1: I'm mad because I left that thing irritated. I'm pestering.

478
00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:52,879
Speaker 2: You know what?

479
00:21:52,880 --> 00:21:54,840
Speaker 1: What's super inspiring to me as we're talking about this

480
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:57,120
Speaker 1: and I'm thinking about the musical last night, I had

481
00:21:57,160 --> 00:21:59,920
Speaker 1: heard that it took you like ten years, well Swiss,

482
00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:02,000
Speaker 1: but that to me last night Sos was like, she's

483
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:04,520
Speaker 1: been working on this for like fifteen years? Is that true?

484
00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:07,520
Speaker 2: It's exaggerated somewhere between ten and thirteen.

485
00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:09,400
Speaker 1: Okay, well that's good. That's a long time.

486
00:22:09,480 --> 00:22:10,960
Speaker 2: It's a long time.

487
00:22:11,320 --> 00:22:13,359
Speaker 1: That was inspiring to me because sometimes I start a

488
00:22:13,359 --> 00:22:16,159
Speaker 1: project or I have an idea and it'll sit or

489
00:22:16,200 --> 00:22:18,320
Speaker 1: it'll I don't know, I just can't get it across

490
00:22:18,320 --> 00:22:20,919
Speaker 1: the finish line. And then I always wondered did I

491
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:23,760
Speaker 1: miss did I miss the moment on it, or did

492
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:25,840
Speaker 1: I miss the you know, because I heard one time

493
00:22:25,840 --> 00:22:28,720
Speaker 1: too Oprah so id always finished what you start. But

494
00:22:28,760 --> 00:22:31,280
Speaker 1: then also sometimes I feel like you start something if

495
00:22:31,280 --> 00:22:34,440
Speaker 1: it's not working for you. Yeah you had yeah, yeah,

496
00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:36,400
Speaker 1: I mean I had to be here, but you believed

497
00:22:36,400 --> 00:22:38,200
Speaker 1: in it. You took it all the way. You came

498
00:22:38,240 --> 00:22:40,160
Speaker 1: back to it. I'm sure left it came back.

499
00:22:40,840 --> 00:22:45,879
Speaker 2: I think the thing about the this world, this theater world.

500
00:22:45,960 --> 00:22:51,760
Speaker 2: You know, my mother left Toledo, Ohio to come to

501
00:22:51,840 --> 00:22:57,440
Speaker 2: study at NYU, and she she is that that New

502
00:22:57,520 --> 00:23:01,440
Speaker 2: York story, you know, she is that one that came

503
00:23:01,520 --> 00:23:03,720
Speaker 2: from somewhere else with a dream to do a thing.

504
00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:06,240
Speaker 2: And in a lot of ways, I always felt like

505
00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:09,320
Speaker 2: she s had to sacrifice that part of her life

506
00:23:09,520 --> 00:23:09,840
Speaker 2: for me.

507
00:23:10,119 --> 00:23:10,760
Speaker 1: Mm.

508
00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:13,879
Speaker 2: You know. So when I am able to kind of

509
00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:18,360
Speaker 2: create these creative endeavors and and do them, I think

510
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:21,120
Speaker 2: about the fact that sh it's her dream too.

511
00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:21,840
Speaker 1: Mm.

512
00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:25,840
Speaker 2: You know I I her dream and my dream are intertwined,

513
00:23:26,480 --> 00:23:29,480
Speaker 2: you know. And so when I think about particularly in

514
00:23:29,480 --> 00:23:32,560
Speaker 2: the theater, because she took me as a kid to tktks,

515
00:23:32,680 --> 00:23:35,359
Speaker 2: the super cheap tickets so we could buy tickets or

516
00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:38,080
Speaker 2: whatever show and watch it together. Mm. You know what

517
00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:42,000
Speaker 2: I mean, I think about this, and now when we've

518
00:23:42,040 --> 00:23:45,040
Speaker 2: been able to create Health's Kitchen, you know, this is

519
00:23:45,160 --> 00:23:48,119
Speaker 2: in a way the accumulation of this dream that she

520
00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:51,359
Speaker 2: had at nineteen. So it really makes me very emotional

521
00:23:51,359 --> 00:23:54,359
Speaker 2: and it makes me really like a you know, it

522
00:23:54,400 --> 00:23:58,960
Speaker 2: makes this so much worth it. You really see through

523
00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:01,920
Speaker 2: Hell's Kitchen that it ultimately as a love storageing a

524
00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:05,320
Speaker 2: mother and a daughter. And you know, I.

525
00:24:05,440 --> 00:24:07,920
Speaker 1: Your mother must have been emotional wreck the first time

526
00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:08,560
Speaker 1: she saw it.

527
00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:10,600
Speaker 2: I know, I me too too.

528
00:24:10,760 --> 00:24:13,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, what did you learn? Like, what what did you

529
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:13,720
Speaker 1: heal from that?

530
00:24:13,800 --> 00:24:16,040
Speaker 2: I think one of the things that I really have

531
00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:19,520
Speaker 2: seen my personal growth, it was it came up yesterday,

532
00:24:21,240 --> 00:24:25,479
Speaker 2: is that I, you know, my father and I, although

533
00:24:25,520 --> 00:24:27,879
Speaker 2: my mother raised me, you know, my father and I

534
00:24:27,920 --> 00:24:31,159
Speaker 2: had a a journey to get through to really find

535
00:24:31,200 --> 00:24:33,840
Speaker 2: our way to our own relationship that had to happen

536
00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:37,880
Speaker 2: in its own time. And I'm very proud of seeing

537
00:24:37,920 --> 00:24:40,800
Speaker 2: the way that we have been able to m meet

538
00:24:40,840 --> 00:24:44,080
Speaker 2: each other where we are. And so you do get

539
00:24:44,119 --> 00:24:47,760
Speaker 2: a glimpse of in the in Hell's Kitchen, of the

540
00:24:47,800 --> 00:24:51,280
Speaker 2: relationship between Ali and her mother and and her mother

541
00:24:51,680 --> 00:24:54,640
Speaker 2: and Ali and her father, And for me, you can

542
00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:59,000
Speaker 2: see the growth of that relationship personally. Yeah, And I

543
00:24:59,000 --> 00:25:01,560
Speaker 2: feel really really I'm proud of that, and I feel

544
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:04,000
Speaker 2: like that's something that's important for people to know that

545
00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:06,879
Speaker 2: there is ways to grow through things that may have

546
00:25:06,960 --> 00:25:07,600
Speaker 2: been challenging.

547
00:25:07,720 --> 00:25:09,400
Speaker 1: How did you get how did what is the key

548
00:25:09,400 --> 00:25:12,119
Speaker 1: to that? To mending a relationship like that? Or is

549
00:25:12,160 --> 00:25:14,480
Speaker 1: it mending even or is just you said meeting each.

550
00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:16,960
Speaker 2: Other where we are? Yeah, I think that. I think

551
00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:19,600
Speaker 2: that's part of it kind of. I think the first

552
00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:24,040
Speaker 2: part for me was like really being able to. We

553
00:25:24,200 --> 00:25:26,679
Speaker 2: think relationships are supposed to be a certain way. You

554
00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:28,840
Speaker 2: think of a father and daughter relationship, and you think

555
00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:31,240
Speaker 2: of a certain relationship. That person's supposed to have raised you,

556
00:25:31,280 --> 00:25:33,600
Speaker 2: they're supposed to have lived with you, maybe they married

557
00:25:33,640 --> 00:25:36,879
Speaker 2: they they married the parent, the other parent, there was

558
00:25:36,920 --> 00:25:39,399
Speaker 2: some type of long standing thing and that This is

559
00:25:39,440 --> 00:25:42,119
Speaker 2: how we see it. But every relationship is not the same.

560
00:25:42,760 --> 00:25:45,640
Speaker 2: So I think at a certain point we have I

561
00:25:45,680 --> 00:25:52,080
Speaker 2: we have in our head the way a s relationship

562
00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:54,920
Speaker 2: is supposed to play out, and if it doesn't look

563
00:25:55,040 --> 00:25:58,600
Speaker 2: like that in our lives, we somehow feel bad about it.

564
00:25:58,640 --> 00:26:01,600
Speaker 2: We feel like that it s something has been something

565
00:26:01,640 --> 00:26:04,199
Speaker 2: has gone wrong. Now, there are plenty of things that

566
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:06,840
Speaker 2: maybe could have been better, for sure, m but just

567
00:26:06,880 --> 00:26:10,359
Speaker 2: because he didn't raise me doesn't mean that we can't

568
00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:13,560
Speaker 2: have our own relationship. I wasn't ready for that at

569
00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:15,560
Speaker 2: a certain point, you know what I mean. But and

570
00:26:15,600 --> 00:26:20,159
Speaker 2: he was either. But then when you realize, okay, so

571
00:26:20,240 --> 00:26:23,960
Speaker 2: maybe he's not daddy, Okay, I c I could, I

572
00:26:23,960 --> 00:26:28,080
Speaker 2: could admit, but we could be We can be friends,

573
00:26:28,480 --> 00:26:30,080
Speaker 2: like we can get to know each other. We can

574
00:26:30,119 --> 00:26:33,280
Speaker 2: actually have a relationship, our own relationship that we define

575
00:26:33,560 --> 00:26:36,639
Speaker 2: in our own way. He is my father, It's the truth,

576
00:26:36,720 --> 00:26:40,000
Speaker 2: and I would like to have a a good relationship

577
00:26:40,000 --> 00:26:43,639
Speaker 2: with him. So I think taking out the expectations of

578
00:26:43,720 --> 00:26:46,239
Speaker 2: what it supposed to be and meaning it where it

579
00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:50,200
Speaker 2: actually is. If you can. If you can't, then don't

580
00:26:50,760 --> 00:26:52,719
Speaker 2: you shouldn't. And I did that too, I said, noy,

581
00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:54,240
Speaker 2: know what, I'm not ready to me to hear. I don't.

582
00:26:54,359 --> 00:26:57,840
Speaker 2: I'm not able to do that. That happened too. But when

583
00:26:57,840 --> 00:27:01,320
Speaker 2: I was, and it was able to be natural and genuine,

584
00:27:01,480 --> 00:27:03,720
Speaker 2: and I was able to be open hearted enough, and

585
00:27:03,760 --> 00:27:07,399
Speaker 2: so is he. And then we communicate, you know, then

586
00:27:07,440 --> 00:27:09,600
Speaker 2: you then you find wow, I do understand that. Oh,

587
00:27:09,640 --> 00:27:10,239
Speaker 2: I can see that.

588
00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:12,320
Speaker 1: It's probably so freeing too, right, Wow?

589
00:27:12,440 --> 00:27:14,639
Speaker 2: It l it takes a load off mm takes a

590
00:27:14,680 --> 00:27:16,120
Speaker 2: big load off, cause I think a lot of times

591
00:27:16,200 --> 00:27:18,959
Speaker 2: we hold all this anger and expectation for things and people.

592
00:27:20,280 --> 00:27:25,080
Speaker 2: But who's who's feeling that anger? You? Who's being affected

593
00:27:25,080 --> 00:27:29,320
Speaker 2: by that anger? You? Who's who's crumbling under that anger? You?

594
00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:32,000
Speaker 2: The other person don't even have a damn clue what

595
00:27:32,160 --> 00:27:34,480
Speaker 2: you feel. They go off living their life great as ever,

596
00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:38,639
Speaker 2: but you are crushed under this anger and pain that

597
00:27:38,680 --> 00:27:41,080
Speaker 2: you're holding on too. So I think when we can

598
00:27:41,160 --> 00:27:44,280
Speaker 2: let that go and kind of say again, we don't,

599
00:27:44,359 --> 00:27:47,280
Speaker 2: that doesn't mean that we have to. It's valid. These

600
00:27:47,320 --> 00:27:50,680
Speaker 2: things come from a place. They deserve to be rectified,

601
00:27:51,280 --> 00:27:56,320
Speaker 2: you know. But if you could let it go, then

602
00:27:56,320 --> 00:28:00,200
Speaker 2: maybe you can start from a new place. So that's

603
00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:01,360
Speaker 2: why I think, because.

604
00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:02,440
Speaker 1: We always hear that you gotta let it go, you

605
00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:04,399
Speaker 1: can't hold on to anger. We hear terms like that,

606
00:28:04,440 --> 00:28:07,360
Speaker 1: but literally how to do that is where people get

607
00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:10,760
Speaker 1: tripped up. Tripped up, yes, because it's emotional. I don't

608
00:28:10,760 --> 00:28:12,439
Speaker 1: know how to do that. But I love what you

609
00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:14,600
Speaker 1: said about just meeting people where they are like, Okay,

610
00:28:14,720 --> 00:28:16,520
Speaker 1: this is our story, so here we are.

611
00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:18,160
Speaker 2: It's you know, right.

612
00:28:19,359 --> 00:28:20,840
Speaker 1: I think that's a good tool and just a good

613
00:28:20,920 --> 00:28:23,760
Speaker 1: kind of understanding of getting there. It's so good for you.

614
00:28:24,080 --> 00:28:27,159
Speaker 1: By the way, the actors are unbelievable. Yes, now that

615
00:28:27,200 --> 00:28:30,560
Speaker 1: you've done this like you have done it, You've done it. Bag.

616
00:28:31,240 --> 00:28:33,920
Speaker 1: You are a household name, my friend, you really are.

617
00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:36,040
Speaker 1: You never think of like you're a household name. There's

618
00:28:36,040 --> 00:28:37,880
Speaker 1: nobody that I could say at Lasia Keys is on

619
00:28:37,880 --> 00:28:40,640
Speaker 1: my podcast and they go, who is she? Nobody that

620
00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:44,480
Speaker 1: does that like you've done. It's wow, it's crazy. And

621
00:28:44,520 --> 00:28:47,520
Speaker 1: you're still regular to me. I don't know, maybe just

622
00:28:47,520 --> 00:28:50,440
Speaker 1: because we have a relationship, but I don't you.

623
00:28:50,400 --> 00:28:53,240
Speaker 2: Don't seem to you know me.

624
00:28:53,920 --> 00:28:58,080
Speaker 1: I know you seem to manage that level of fame

625
00:28:59,360 --> 00:29:02,240
Speaker 1: at least from the outside really well, like you seem

626
00:29:02,320 --> 00:29:04,680
Speaker 1: to have a good core group. I guess family probably

627
00:29:04,680 --> 00:29:05,640
Speaker 1: helps with that, right.

628
00:29:05,560 --> 00:29:09,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, I do. I think family, you know. I think

629
00:29:09,320 --> 00:29:13,000
Speaker 2: it's also like where I came from that also instilled

630
00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:15,720
Speaker 2: that in me. And by you know, not to mention

631
00:29:15,800 --> 00:29:18,520
Speaker 2: the fact that if you know my mother, you know she.

632
00:29:18,640 --> 00:29:21,240
Speaker 1: Will has she ever done that? Has she ever said

633
00:29:21,240 --> 00:29:23,440
Speaker 1: to you like you are feeling yourself?

634
00:29:24,480 --> 00:29:26,720
Speaker 2: She will like you need you know, just good feel

635
00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:30,320
Speaker 2: just keep you humble, like how to keep you.

636
00:29:30,400 --> 00:29:33,320
Speaker 1: Humble, And she's right, you want to be humble, you do?

637
00:29:33,520 --> 00:29:36,280
Speaker 2: You do have to kind of like keep things into perspective.

638
00:29:36,400 --> 00:29:37,560
Speaker 1: And do you ever be in your bag?

639
00:29:37,680 --> 00:29:42,720
Speaker 2: Sometimes that doesn't mean that I can't be on my ship.

640
00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:45,760
Speaker 2: I can still be on my ship.

641
00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:48,760
Speaker 1: And what what lifts you up? What do you most

642
00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:53,200
Speaker 1: feel like you're in your bag? What is the circumstances

643
00:29:53,240 --> 00:29:54,880
Speaker 1: that would you know?

644
00:29:54,960 --> 00:29:58,800
Speaker 2: I feel like what I'm recognizing is I can I

645
00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:03,000
Speaker 2: can really be in my bag when I have a

646
00:30:03,040 --> 00:30:06,160
Speaker 2: really strong team. M I feel like I feel the

647
00:30:06,160 --> 00:30:09,920
Speaker 2: most in my bag, Like you know, just recently this summer,

648
00:30:09,960 --> 00:30:12,000
Speaker 2: I did the Keys to the Summer tour and I

649
00:30:12,040 --> 00:30:15,320
Speaker 2: felt like I reunited with one of my favorite directors

650
00:30:15,360 --> 00:30:18,640
Speaker 2: named Diane Martel. She did the thing got You video,

651
00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:21,800
Speaker 2: she did the like You'll never see me again video,

652
00:30:22,440 --> 00:30:25,959
Speaker 2: and we connected, you know, to to create the stage

653
00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:28,840
Speaker 2: show for Keys to the Summer and I just felt

654
00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:31,880
Speaker 2: like she's so understood a side of me, and she

655
00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:35,800
Speaker 2: has such a strength in herself that it allowed me

656
00:30:35,840 --> 00:30:39,000
Speaker 2: to be in my bag because the team that I

657
00:30:39,160 --> 00:30:42,440
Speaker 2: was assembling just felt like strong. That's the same way

658
00:30:42,480 --> 00:30:44,400
Speaker 2: I feel with Hell's Kitchen. I feel that same way.

659
00:30:44,440 --> 00:30:47,719
Speaker 2: It's a strong team. Everyone holds their weight, and so

660
00:30:47,800 --> 00:30:49,560
Speaker 2: I can be in my bag. We can all be

661
00:30:49,640 --> 00:30:54,240
Speaker 2: in our bag because there's like equal sharing of the responsibility.

662
00:30:54,840 --> 00:30:56,640
Speaker 2: That's what I can That's when I feel the most

663
00:30:56,680 --> 00:30:58,640
Speaker 2: in my bag. Sometimes when you have to carry all

664
00:30:58,720 --> 00:31:01,160
Speaker 2: the weight and do all the on that you're like

665
00:31:01,400 --> 00:31:03,280
Speaker 2: you can't quite get in your bag because you got

666
00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:03,520
Speaker 2: to do.

667
00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:06,880
Speaker 1: Or speaking to my soul right now. Just clear, she's

668
00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:10,800
Speaker 1: not speaking to our soul. We've been trying to. Sometimes

669
00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:12,520
Speaker 1: I just have all these ideas and things I want

670
00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:14,000
Speaker 1: to do and I don't have the resources, so I

671
00:31:14,120 --> 00:31:16,680
Speaker 1: pile it on myself or you know, I have like

672
00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:20,760
Speaker 1: a small team, very small team, and so sometimes you

673
00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:24,720
Speaker 1: over extend yourself and there's no way to deliver or

674
00:31:24,800 --> 00:31:26,640
Speaker 1: to be, like you say, in your bag when you're

675
00:31:26,640 --> 00:31:28,239
Speaker 1: like spread them like that is hard at all.

676
00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:30,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, and I've been there many times. I mean,

677
00:31:30,960 --> 00:31:33,920
Speaker 2: my team will understand too, where we're pretty small as well. Yeah,

678
00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:35,520
Speaker 2: there was came a time where we were like, Okay,

679
00:31:36,360 --> 00:31:38,920
Speaker 2: we have to say no. We have to say more no.

680
00:31:39,120 --> 00:31:41,360
Speaker 1: Talk to me about no. Okay, when do you say no?

681
00:31:42,120 --> 00:31:45,320
Speaker 2: You know, well, first of all, I've realized because you're ambitious,

682
00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:46,160
Speaker 2: you know.

683
00:31:46,440 --> 00:31:49,280
Speaker 1: To balance. I try to balance though I am ambitious.

684
00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:51,280
Speaker 2: And that's a blessing because you have ideas, you have things,

685
00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:55,480
Speaker 2: You're motivated, you're inspired, you have on so many levels,

686
00:31:55,520 --> 00:31:58,760
Speaker 2: which is such a blessing. But then you have to realize,

687
00:31:58,760 --> 00:32:02,680
Speaker 2: if I can't execute this in the manner that I

688
00:32:02,680 --> 00:32:06,360
Speaker 2: would expect of myself, you know, then I have to

689
00:32:06,360 --> 00:32:09,280
Speaker 2: say no. And if I'm putting too much on my team,

690
00:32:09,320 --> 00:32:12,920
Speaker 2: because now we're we've already said yes to far too

691
00:32:12,920 --> 00:32:16,040
Speaker 2: many things, you know, we have to say no. So

692
00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:19,640
Speaker 2: we have started a practice where we were like, okay,

693
00:32:19,720 --> 00:32:21,400
Speaker 2: this is this has to be a no because it

694
00:32:21,600 --> 00:32:22,720
Speaker 2: just it's gonna takes it.

695
00:32:22,720 --> 00:32:24,479
Speaker 1: Ever break your heart. Have you ever made a mistake?

696
00:32:24,520 --> 00:32:26,959
Speaker 1: And no, have you ever ever something you're like, ah,

697
00:32:26,960 --> 00:32:28,000
Speaker 1: I should have did it?

698
00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:31,360
Speaker 2: No, But I felt many times when I was like, oh,

699
00:32:31,480 --> 00:32:32,560
Speaker 2: I shouldn't have did it.

700
00:32:33,760 --> 00:32:34,520
Speaker 1: More more regret.

701
00:32:34,560 --> 00:32:36,400
Speaker 2: When you do regret, I'm like I knew, I sh

702
00:32:36,440 --> 00:32:39,520
Speaker 2: I knew this wasn't it and my spirit said don't

703
00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:42,600
Speaker 2: do it. And now here I am doing it and

704
00:32:42,680 --> 00:32:45,600
Speaker 2: I'm mad. I'm not feel I'm not in my joy

705
00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:48,800
Speaker 2: like I feel frustrated, you know, so I do feel

706
00:32:48,800 --> 00:32:53,920
Speaker 2: like the nose are y. As part of the relationship

707
00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:58,840
Speaker 2: of practicing to speak my truth, I have learned to

708
00:32:58,880 --> 00:33:03,240
Speaker 2: also trust my gut. And I know what yes feels like.

709
00:33:04,120 --> 00:33:06,120
Speaker 2: I know what yes feels like mm. I'm very clear

710
00:33:06,120 --> 00:33:08,200
Speaker 2: about what yes feels like. And I know how it

711
00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:10,360
Speaker 2: feels when it's a maybe mm. And I know what

712
00:33:10,440 --> 00:33:12,440
Speaker 2: it feels like when it's like it's not really a no,

713
00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:14,560
Speaker 2: but I think that it's gonna make a few people happy,

714
00:33:14,600 --> 00:33:16,480
Speaker 2: so I make it turn into a yes because I

715
00:33:16,520 --> 00:33:20,840
Speaker 2: think that it's gonna be nice for those people. But

716
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:24,720
Speaker 2: it's not a yes, it's no. It wasn't a yes,

717
00:33:24,760 --> 00:33:27,680
Speaker 2: it was a maybe. And so if it's not a yes,

718
00:33:28,080 --> 00:33:28,680
Speaker 2: then it's a no.

719
00:33:30,320 --> 00:33:32,440
Speaker 1: I don't know, w I I whatever you just said,

720
00:33:32,440 --> 00:33:34,120
Speaker 1: I'm gonna put in a little clipper and put it

721
00:33:34,200 --> 00:33:36,520
Speaker 1: for remind myself like this when I'm saying yes to

722
00:33:36,520 --> 00:33:38,600
Speaker 1: too many things and gonna that's gonna be like remind

723
00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:42,000
Speaker 1: my reminder. I can't repeat it exactly what you said,

724
00:33:42,040 --> 00:33:43,720
Speaker 1: but I know it was important. I know I need

725
00:33:43,760 --> 00:33:46,560
Speaker 1: to hear that again. I know I need to rewind

726
00:33:46,600 --> 00:33:49,080
Speaker 1: that and press play on that mm, but the nose

727
00:33:49,120 --> 00:33:50,240
Speaker 1: and the maybes and the yes.

728
00:33:50,120 --> 00:33:53,720
Speaker 2: It's right. So but I feel you, man, Let's talk

729
00:33:53,720 --> 00:33:54,959
Speaker 2: about it's a holiday season.

730
00:33:55,280 --> 00:33:58,800
Speaker 1: People are dealing with all types of family holiday season

731
00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:02,200
Speaker 1: vibes and they're home. Some people get very excited and

732
00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:06,320
Speaker 1: very holiday ish. Yes, some people stresses them out. I

733
00:34:06,400 --> 00:34:09,360
Speaker 1: just wonder what your family dying because you from the gram,

734
00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:11,480
Speaker 1: I mean I know you personally, but like from the gram,

735
00:34:11,840 --> 00:34:14,279
Speaker 1: your family looks like they have the greatest time ever

736
00:34:14,400 --> 00:34:15,360
Speaker 1: at every occasion.

737
00:34:15,960 --> 00:34:18,320
Speaker 2: What else? Right, It's just just tricky, right, it's the

738
00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:21,480
Speaker 2: highlight tricky thing about you know, any social media?

739
00:34:21,680 --> 00:34:25,720
Speaker 1: What is the family dynamic of the Alicia Keys holiday season?

740
00:34:25,840 --> 00:34:28,319
Speaker 1: And well, first of allah, break it down, list let.

741
00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:32,160
Speaker 2: Me family situation. What you need to do is get

742
00:34:32,160 --> 00:34:36,000
Speaker 2: this diary Alicia Keys twenty vinyl. Oh yes, per playing

743
00:34:36,080 --> 00:34:40,319
Speaker 2: in the back at your function. It will fix whatever's wrong,

744
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:43,520
Speaker 2: whatever's going on, whatever stress you might be feeling, whatever

745
00:34:43,680 --> 00:34:48,120
Speaker 2: like uncertainty. It's just going wide it away. You're gonna

746
00:34:48,120 --> 00:34:50,040
Speaker 2: be good. And if you don't know what to get

747
00:34:50,080 --> 00:34:54,160
Speaker 2: somebody as a gift, oh look at that, so look

748
00:34:54,200 --> 00:34:58,760
Speaker 2: at that. Just saying that the house that's at our house.

749
00:35:01,080 --> 00:35:02,960
Speaker 2: It's awesome. I think it's I think it's really cool.

750
00:35:03,000 --> 00:35:04,640
Speaker 2: We we have a really big family, m as.

751
00:35:04,680 --> 00:35:06,880
Speaker 1: You know, I know you have a blended family.

752
00:35:07,120 --> 00:35:11,160
Speaker 2: You have a big, blended, awesome family. Yeah, and I

753
00:35:11,239 --> 00:35:13,120
Speaker 2: and I gotta say all of us. It's kind of

754
00:35:13,160 --> 00:35:15,759
Speaker 2: like a all of us kind of pass through. We

755
00:35:15,800 --> 00:35:20,839
Speaker 2: have different moments that we're together. I love we do

756
00:35:20,880 --> 00:35:23,440
Speaker 2: this pre I'm big into rituals.

757
00:35:23,640 --> 00:35:25,600
Speaker 1: Tell me about your rituals. Give us one or two.

758
00:35:25,840 --> 00:35:30,280
Speaker 2: We do this pre Christmas ritual, mkay. And it happens

759
00:35:30,320 --> 00:35:34,640
Speaker 2: the it happens on Christmas Eve, and we make each

760
00:35:34,680 --> 00:35:39,200
Speaker 2: other handmade gifts. Now everybody wants to kill me cause

761
00:35:39,200 --> 00:35:41,520
Speaker 2: they're like, honestly, we gotta do this again this year.

762
00:35:41,520 --> 00:35:44,760
Speaker 2: And I say, yes, we have to do it because

763
00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:47,680
Speaker 2: it's special. And every time we do it, it does

764
00:35:47,920 --> 00:35:52,359
Speaker 2: bring up something unique, and we gather together and we

765
00:35:52,440 --> 00:35:56,319
Speaker 2: all have to kind of present what we made. And

766
00:35:56,560 --> 00:35:58,480
Speaker 2: you know, you pull the name and sometimes you know

767
00:35:58,560 --> 00:36:00,920
Speaker 2: that person really well. Sometimes you don't, h and that's

768
00:36:01,000 --> 00:36:02,560
Speaker 2: kind of cool cause you're like, Okay, well what would

769
00:36:02,560 --> 00:36:04,799
Speaker 2: this person like and how could I get to know

770
00:36:05,120 --> 00:36:06,760
Speaker 2: them a little bit better? And what can I damn

771
00:36:06,800 --> 00:36:10,640
Speaker 2: make with my own hands that will not be stupid.

772
00:36:11,320 --> 00:36:13,640
Speaker 1: And then the person might enjoy. Give me an example,

773
00:36:13,680 --> 00:36:15,560
Speaker 1: what is something you made, like when did you kill it?

774
00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:17,799
Speaker 2: Alright, I'll tell you when I kill ki.

775
00:36:17,920 --> 00:36:18,640
Speaker 1: Okay, good telling.

776
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:21,920
Speaker 2: But maybe it's something as simple as like you have

777
00:36:21,960 --> 00:36:25,319
Speaker 2: a beautiful printed picture and you put it into a

778
00:36:25,360 --> 00:36:28,359
Speaker 2: frame that you kind of decorated with something. Yeah, right,

779
00:36:28,440 --> 00:36:29,480
Speaker 2: So maybe it's something like that.

780
00:36:29,640 --> 00:36:29,879
Speaker 1: Kay.

781
00:36:30,040 --> 00:36:35,040
Speaker 2: The time that I killed it, it was for Genesis.

782
00:36:35,080 --> 00:36:39,839
Speaker 2: I got Genesis MM and I decided to make this

783
00:36:39,960 --> 00:36:43,839
Speaker 2: kind of sculpture of this this anime that they love,

784
00:36:43,920 --> 00:36:47,239
Speaker 2: and I created the tree so that he could have

785
00:36:47,280 --> 00:36:49,400
Speaker 2: his like characters and he could play in the in

786
00:36:49,480 --> 00:36:51,480
Speaker 2: the this this main tree. I think it was either

787
00:36:51,520 --> 00:36:54,520
Speaker 2: one piece or Hunter ex Hunter or one of them.

788
00:36:54,560 --> 00:36:56,080
Speaker 2: So I made the tree and it was ill. I

789
00:36:56,160 --> 00:36:57,880
Speaker 2: made the whole base of it, and I had to

790
00:36:57,920 --> 00:37:00,880
Speaker 2: paint it, and there's like a whole uh see around it.

791
00:37:00,960 --> 00:37:03,560
Speaker 2: So we did this whole technique with kind of like

792
00:37:03,800 --> 00:37:05,560
Speaker 2: the stones and the thing and the sea.

793
00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:08,040
Speaker 1: You're making at cards with your hands, you know, you

794
00:37:08,120 --> 00:37:08,879
Speaker 1: make it like a hole.

795
00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:10,680
Speaker 2: It was a treat in the sea that was the

796
00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:12,920
Speaker 2: that was the animate that he could play his his

797
00:37:12,960 --> 00:37:14,960
Speaker 2: little toys in and I was like, oh I I

798
00:37:15,560 --> 00:37:19,640
Speaker 2: one body killed this. Of course I ain't never see

799
00:37:19,680 --> 00:37:23,040
Speaker 2: him pay with it, no want like not like all

800
00:37:23,080 --> 00:37:24,040
Speaker 2: eyes in the corner.

801
00:37:24,239 --> 00:37:25,680
Speaker 1: It doesn't take away from the fact that.

802
00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:27,120
Speaker 2: You killed it. I did kill it.

803
00:37:27,360 --> 00:37:33,000
Speaker 1: Killed it. That's what is the greatest lesson you've learned

804
00:37:33,160 --> 00:37:36,920
Speaker 1: in marriage about yourself? Mm? What does marriage taught you

805
00:37:36,960 --> 00:37:37,600
Speaker 1: about yourself?

806
00:37:38,000 --> 00:37:38,360
Speaker 2: Wow?

807
00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:42,920
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, cause really it's that's what they say it is.

808
00:37:43,320 --> 00:37:44,240
Speaker 2: It's a mirror.

809
00:37:44,560 --> 00:37:47,919
Speaker 1: It's a mirror, right, It's like nothing makes you work

810
00:37:47,960 --> 00:37:51,479
Speaker 1: on yourself more than living a life with somebody else.

811
00:37:51,560 --> 00:37:54,200
Speaker 2: Right now, It's so good. This question is really good.

812
00:37:54,400 --> 00:38:01,480
Speaker 2: Thank you. I definitely know that I am. I'm an

813
00:38:01,600 --> 00:38:06,640
Speaker 2: organizer and I enjoy that. I really like to create

814
00:38:06,680 --> 00:38:11,560
Speaker 2: the space for the time that we need. And I

815
00:38:11,680 --> 00:38:14,480
Speaker 2: learned that I'm really good at that and I have

816
00:38:14,680 --> 00:38:18,399
Speaker 2: to constantly not let that go.

817
00:38:18,560 --> 00:38:19,040
Speaker 1: Mm.

818
00:38:19,040 --> 00:38:21,200
Speaker 2: Like that's a really important thing that I'm good at,

819
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:24,239
Speaker 2: and that I think it really flourished it. It helps

820
00:38:24,320 --> 00:38:27,319
Speaker 2: us to flourish. M you know, because it's easy to

821
00:38:27,360 --> 00:38:31,280
Speaker 2: be so busy, it's easy to be distracted, it's easy

822
00:38:31,320 --> 00:38:37,319
Speaker 2: to be working hard, so to me is like, that's

823
00:38:37,400 --> 00:38:40,600
Speaker 2: just the Aromonts and that's and that's it's something I'm

824
00:38:40,640 --> 00:38:43,080
Speaker 2: good at. Yeah, we're good at it, but I'm really

825
00:38:43,080 --> 00:38:44,359
Speaker 2: good at Like, w is there.

826
00:38:44,280 --> 00:38:46,600
Speaker 1: Anything you had to fix about yourself? Cause I feel

827
00:38:46,640 --> 00:38:48,480
Speaker 1: like that is a thing. Like for me, one of

828
00:38:48,520 --> 00:38:50,480
Speaker 1: the things in my relationship I learned about myself is

829
00:38:50,520 --> 00:38:53,920
Speaker 1: that I would internalize you know, I'm a empathetic person,

830
00:38:54,000 --> 00:38:56,080
Speaker 1: right like I my friends, I wanna you know, I

831
00:38:56,080 --> 00:38:58,320
Speaker 1: wanna help them if I can, and I would carry

832
00:38:58,320 --> 00:39:01,600
Speaker 1: it m and then bring it home. And I never

833
00:39:01,680 --> 00:39:04,000
Speaker 1: knew that about myself until somebody had he had to

834
00:39:04,000 --> 00:39:05,880
Speaker 1: point it out to me. You know, somebody close to

835
00:39:05,920 --> 00:39:09,319
Speaker 1: you teaches you something about yourself or just and so

836
00:39:09,360 --> 00:39:11,279
Speaker 1: I realized that and it's actually been really helpful in

837
00:39:11,320 --> 00:39:13,319
Speaker 1: my life to be able to be there, still be

838
00:39:13,400 --> 00:39:15,760
Speaker 1: there and be empathetic but let it kind of almost

839
00:39:15,800 --> 00:39:20,040
Speaker 1: things go through me as opposed to like holding everybody's.

840
00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:21,960
Speaker 2: Energy issues things. Yes.

841
00:39:22,160 --> 00:39:24,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, so that's like for me, that was one thing.

842
00:39:24,040 --> 00:39:26,000
Speaker 1: I just wonder if you have any of those experience

843
00:39:26,080 --> 00:39:28,439
Speaker 1: where he put like a mirror to you, like, hey,

844
00:39:28,640 --> 00:39:29,719
Speaker 1: maybe you want to work on this.

845
00:39:29,840 --> 00:39:32,880
Speaker 2: I think I have to continue to work on. And

846
00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:36,440
Speaker 2: I've seen that I have to work on being just

847
00:39:36,600 --> 00:39:40,120
Speaker 2: better at being a little more still like I'm a

848
00:39:40,239 --> 00:39:41,719
Speaker 2: do or I'm a getter, or I'm a thinger, I'm

849
00:39:41,760 --> 00:39:43,600
Speaker 2: a fixer, I'm an organizer, a thing I'm gonna go,

850
00:39:43,719 --> 00:39:45,840
Speaker 2: or I'm love And I think that I have to

851
00:39:45,920 --> 00:39:48,120
Speaker 2: get I've seen that I have to get better at

852
00:39:48,120 --> 00:39:50,600
Speaker 2: being like it's okay that you're just like but he's

853
00:39:50,640 --> 00:39:52,640
Speaker 2: the same way. He's definitely the same.

854
00:39:52,680 --> 00:39:54,200
Speaker 1: I can't tell you that you're not.

855
00:39:54,560 --> 00:39:55,239
Speaker 2: He's the same.

856
00:39:55,360 --> 00:39:57,360
Speaker 1: He's more I think more than you.

857
00:39:57,640 --> 00:40:01,120
Speaker 2: Or But I think he's good at like when he's home,

858
00:40:01,600 --> 00:40:05,040
Speaker 2: he's good at kind of like being able to be easy.

859
00:40:05,480 --> 00:40:08,000
Speaker 2: He can like sleep in the bed, He'll rest until

860
00:40:08,440 --> 00:40:10,720
Speaker 2: ten eleven twelve. Me, I'm like six am.

861
00:40:10,600 --> 00:40:11,839
Speaker 1: I rest bum bong bong.

862
00:40:12,280 --> 00:40:16,319
Speaker 2: He's like, we gonna need a little like give me.

863
00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:19,200
Speaker 1: Up till a twelve PM. I need it like at

864
00:40:19,239 --> 00:40:20,160
Speaker 1: least till twelve.

865
00:40:20,880 --> 00:40:22,719
Speaker 2: And I need it too, m you know what I mean.

866
00:40:22,760 --> 00:40:24,799
Speaker 2: So I think that being able to just kind of

867
00:40:24,840 --> 00:40:31,080
Speaker 2: like still like be still, not not actually activate and

868
00:40:31,320 --> 00:40:34,240
Speaker 2: execute all the things, just kind of like be still

869
00:40:34,320 --> 00:40:38,400
Speaker 2: in the space together it's really nice. And that's something

870
00:40:38,440 --> 00:40:41,040
Speaker 2: that I I always have to be like, wait, stop

871
00:40:41,080 --> 00:40:42,640
Speaker 2: trying to do all the things I'm trying to plan,

872
00:40:42,680 --> 00:40:43,839
Speaker 2: all the things I'm trying to do.

873
00:40:43,840 --> 00:40:46,799
Speaker 1: With cam your red down. How happy are you on

874
00:40:46,840 --> 00:40:48,320
Speaker 1: a scale of one to ten today?

875
00:40:48,640 --> 00:40:52,480
Speaker 2: Today? I'm definitely I I'm not a fucking.

876
00:40:52,239 --> 00:40:55,839
Speaker 1: Ten, really, I am? That is that? Is that all

877
00:40:55,880 --> 00:40:56,560
Speaker 1: the time for you?

878
00:40:56,719 --> 00:40:57,760
Speaker 2: Most all the time?

879
00:40:57,880 --> 00:41:00,000
Speaker 1: No, that's not all the no, I know, but it's

880
00:41:00,080 --> 00:41:02,279
Speaker 1: had a common thing. Some people say they have never

881
00:41:02,320 --> 00:41:04,560
Speaker 1: got to a tech. Some people like, uh, keep a

882
00:41:04,680 --> 00:41:08,719
Speaker 1: tend reserved. I was gonna go eight nine, Okay, I was.

883
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:11,440
Speaker 2: That was my first thing, honest, first reason gotta be

884
00:41:11,480 --> 00:41:14,280
Speaker 2: honest was like eight nine and I and I felt

885
00:41:14,320 --> 00:41:17,319
Speaker 2: like when I checked in with myself, I felt that

886
00:41:17,400 --> 00:41:21,799
Speaker 2: I was not honoring my joy and I I think

887
00:41:21,880 --> 00:41:27,440
Speaker 2: that it is very important that when we're feeling joyful, mm,

888
00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:30,239
Speaker 2: that we can say we're feeling joyful. I think it's

889
00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:32,120
Speaker 2: so easy to say this is not good and I'm

890
00:41:32,160 --> 00:41:34,440
Speaker 2: not happy and this is not going well, and that

891
00:41:34,480 --> 00:41:36,440
Speaker 2: happens too. And there's plenty of that too that I

892
00:41:36,480 --> 00:41:38,759
Speaker 2: could pull out and be like, well, this isn't that good.

893
00:41:39,320 --> 00:41:42,880
Speaker 2: But I'm feeling joyful. I'm feeling grateful. I was thinking

894
00:41:42,880 --> 00:41:47,200
Speaker 2: about this, celebrating this milestone with diary. I was thinking

895
00:41:47,280 --> 00:41:50,439
Speaker 2: about launching something that I've been working on so long,

896
00:41:50,480 --> 00:41:52,759
Speaker 2: with Hell's Kitchen. I was thinking about the love I

897
00:41:52,800 --> 00:41:56,160
Speaker 2: have for my family and my husband, my son being

898
00:41:56,200 --> 00:41:58,480
Speaker 2: there with me, my hubby being here with me, and

899
00:41:58,520 --> 00:42:02,160
Speaker 2: I feel healthy. I'm sitting with my friends. He's actually here.

900
00:42:02,200 --> 00:42:04,279
Speaker 2: He might be happy right now, but he was. I'm

901
00:42:04,280 --> 00:42:07,680
Speaker 2: sitting here with my friends. We're talking, We're we're together,

902
00:42:07,960 --> 00:42:12,120
Speaker 2: We're well, our minds are intact, our spirits are good.

903
00:42:12,400 --> 00:42:15,680
Speaker 1: In real life? What do you pray for most me?

904
00:42:15,880 --> 00:42:17,120
Speaker 2: I prayed for clarity.

905
00:42:17,640 --> 00:42:22,640
Speaker 1: That's mine. I hate being confused. I hate not knowing

906
00:42:22,719 --> 00:42:24,880
Speaker 1: and not I It's like, if I know, I can

907
00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:27,040
Speaker 1: figure out a plan of action, or I could I

908
00:42:27,320 --> 00:42:29,840
Speaker 1: know how to show up. If I don't have clarity,

909
00:42:29,880 --> 00:42:31,880
Speaker 1: I feel it's crazy.

910
00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:33,760
Speaker 2: You know, it's crazy. It's crazy.

911
00:42:34,120 --> 00:42:35,200
Speaker 1: That's a great prayer.

912
00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:42,239
Speaker 2: Yeah, clarity, clarity and and peace. Safety. It's good.

913
00:42:42,320 --> 00:42:44,880
Speaker 1: Mm moost are good in real life. What are you

914
00:42:44,920 --> 00:42:46,280
Speaker 1: most proud of about yourself?

915
00:42:47,560 --> 00:42:50,360
Speaker 2: In real life? I am most proud that I am

916
00:42:50,760 --> 00:42:55,960
Speaker 2: a normal human me, I don't know, most proud and

917
00:42:56,120 --> 00:42:59,120
Speaker 2: I'm like, you know, I feel like people can meet me,

918
00:42:59,280 --> 00:43:02,280
Speaker 2: seeing me, talk to me, bill with me. They're gonna

919
00:43:02,320 --> 00:43:05,440
Speaker 2: know that I am their sister. I am just I

920
00:43:05,480 --> 00:43:08,880
Speaker 2: am that same energy. I have not shifted that energy.

921
00:43:08,920 --> 00:43:12,160
Speaker 2: That energy will always be there. I am very proud

922
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:13,960
Speaker 2: of that. I think that's easy to lose.

923
00:43:14,680 --> 00:43:16,960
Speaker 1: Yes, you are a household name. You know.

924
00:43:17,760 --> 00:43:21,400
Speaker 2: You reminded me you could easily be your there's some

925
00:43:21,480 --> 00:43:24,959
Speaker 2: big headed, annoying human and I'm not with it. I'm

926
00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:26,560
Speaker 2: just not even with it at all.

927
00:43:28,120 --> 00:43:29,920
Speaker 1: That would not be good for anyone.

928
00:43:30,120 --> 00:43:31,560
Speaker 2: No, and real life.

929
00:43:31,560 --> 00:43:32,759
Speaker 1: How important is money to you?

930
00:43:33,480 --> 00:43:38,360
Speaker 2: Mm? Obviously you know money does help a lot of things.

931
00:43:38,600 --> 00:43:41,920
Speaker 2: But for me, that's not where wealth is. To me,

932
00:43:42,000 --> 00:43:44,799
Speaker 2: that's not wealth, that's not that's not rich to me.

933
00:43:45,080 --> 00:43:49,520
Speaker 2: Like your your sanity is where your wealth is. Your health, man,

934
00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:53,200
Speaker 2: there's nothing more important than you being able to be healthy.

935
00:43:53,360 --> 00:43:55,840
Speaker 2: You know, that is your wealth to be able to

936
00:43:56,480 --> 00:43:59,760
Speaker 2: you know, wake up and have all your wits about

937
00:43:59,800 --> 00:44:03,719
Speaker 2: you and love, like real love, genuine that thing that's real,

938
00:44:03,880 --> 00:44:07,160
Speaker 2: not based on something that you have or gonna get

939
00:44:07,440 --> 00:44:10,880
Speaker 2: for something that who you just are on a Wednesday

940
00:44:11,480 --> 00:44:15,719
Speaker 2: in your pajamas with nothing, you know, those are those

941
00:44:15,719 --> 00:44:18,040
Speaker 2: are the thing that's that's like, that's the wealth, that's

942
00:44:18,280 --> 00:44:21,640
Speaker 2: that's being rich. So I really I'm very clear about

943
00:44:21,680 --> 00:44:22,960
Speaker 2: that in real life.

944
00:44:22,960 --> 00:44:25,000
Speaker 1: What are your triggers or your pet peeves? Like, what

945
00:44:25,120 --> 00:44:27,000
Speaker 1: is something that would take you that number ten?

946
00:44:28,920 --> 00:44:35,600
Speaker 2: I mean some of my pet peeves hm on one

947
00:44:35,640 --> 00:44:37,759
Speaker 2: of mine I don't like.

948
00:44:39,600 --> 00:44:42,719
Speaker 1: I don't like people trying to manipulate me. Yeah, way, oh,

949
00:44:43,000 --> 00:44:44,799
Speaker 1: somebody tell me half the story, cause they trying to

950
00:44:44,800 --> 00:44:46,880
Speaker 1: make me do I I could cause I see you

951
00:44:46,920 --> 00:44:51,479
Speaker 1: from up the block. Yeah, you could have just asked

952
00:44:51,480 --> 00:44:53,120
Speaker 1: me for what you needed me to do. Cause nine

953
00:44:53,120 --> 00:44:55,759
Speaker 1: times out of ten, if I can, I would. But

954
00:44:55,800 --> 00:44:59,520
Speaker 1: when you try to, I don't know why. That's just triggered.

955
00:44:59,520 --> 00:45:01,560
Speaker 1: I probably you would figure that out. But it's for

956
00:45:01,680 --> 00:45:04,040
Speaker 1: sure trigger for me will literally make me not like someone.

957
00:45:04,080 --> 00:45:04,640
Speaker 1: It's not okay.

958
00:45:04,880 --> 00:45:05,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, I can go.

959
00:45:05,880 --> 00:45:07,480
Speaker 1: From like, oh they seem like a nice person to

960
00:45:07,840 --> 00:45:08,480
Speaker 1: I don't like that.

961
00:45:09,200 --> 00:45:09,879
Speaker 2: That's a good one.

962
00:45:09,960 --> 00:45:11,200
Speaker 1: That's a real one for me.

963
00:45:11,280 --> 00:45:12,040
Speaker 2: That's a right one.

964
00:45:12,200 --> 00:45:12,439
Speaker 1: Yeah.

965
00:45:12,680 --> 00:45:15,720
Speaker 2: Man, what's one of my triggers? So it's probably knows

966
00:45:15,960 --> 00:45:18,400
Speaker 2: I feel like I feel like one of My triggers

967
00:45:18,440 --> 00:45:21,000
Speaker 2: are like I need you to do what you said

968
00:45:21,040 --> 00:45:23,440
Speaker 2: you're gonna do. Mmm, Like I do what I say

969
00:45:23,480 --> 00:45:27,200
Speaker 2: I'm gonna do. So when people can't meet me where

970
00:45:27,239 --> 00:45:30,160
Speaker 2: I meet them, that triggers me. And like you said

971
00:45:30,360 --> 00:45:32,719
Speaker 2: you were gonna do that, you should do what you

972
00:45:32,760 --> 00:45:34,839
Speaker 2: say you're gonna do. You know that's a big one

973
00:45:34,880 --> 00:45:37,000
Speaker 2: for me. Or don't say it. Just don't say something

974
00:45:37,040 --> 00:45:38,560
Speaker 2: that you can't do. If you can't do it, don't

975
00:45:38,560 --> 00:45:40,120
Speaker 2: don't don't say you can do it.

976
00:45:40,520 --> 00:45:42,279
Speaker 1: I just thought of Little Alley in the play and

977
00:45:42,320 --> 00:45:44,920
Speaker 1: her dad saying she's coming to the thing. That's probably

978
00:45:44,920 --> 00:45:45,600
Speaker 1: what that's rue.

979
00:45:45,840 --> 00:45:49,080
Speaker 2: I think it might come a little bit from there

980
00:45:50,320 --> 00:45:50,960
Speaker 2: a little bit.

981
00:45:51,239 --> 00:45:53,560
Speaker 1: And then in real life, what do you I don't know.

982
00:45:53,600 --> 00:45:55,799
Speaker 1: What do you hope people take from your story and

983
00:45:55,840 --> 00:45:57,920
Speaker 1: what you put out in the world, like mm or

984
00:45:57,960 --> 00:46:00,200
Speaker 1: even this conversation today, like when you make things eks

985
00:46:00,239 --> 00:46:02,240
Speaker 1: wh where where do you hope they land?

986
00:46:03,120 --> 00:46:06,080
Speaker 2: Yeah? Man, I hope that they land in people's hearts.

987
00:46:06,120 --> 00:46:10,440
Speaker 2: I feel like I just want people to feel the genuineness,

988
00:46:10,520 --> 00:46:14,879
Speaker 2: the the care, and the pure energy that goes into it,

989
00:46:15,560 --> 00:46:18,879
Speaker 2: because I think that we're receiving a lot of messages

990
00:46:19,040 --> 00:46:23,960
Speaker 2: that are filled with like not pure intention. Mm you

991
00:46:24,000 --> 00:46:26,640
Speaker 2: know what I mean. And so I would love for

992
00:46:26,760 --> 00:46:30,320
Speaker 2: people to just take away that there is that genuineness,

993
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:33,880
Speaker 2: there is that authentic energy that we can be. We

994
00:46:33,960 --> 00:46:36,080
Speaker 2: can be who we actually are. We don't have to

995
00:46:36,120 --> 00:46:38,400
Speaker 2: put on a bunch of acts and phony and fake

996
00:46:38,440 --> 00:46:42,280
Speaker 2: it down and up. We can just be You are special,

997
00:46:42,760 --> 00:46:45,560
Speaker 2: just how you are. And so I would love that

998
00:46:46,120 --> 00:46:49,879
Speaker 2: my comfort in who I am uh reminds somebody that

999
00:46:49,920 --> 00:46:53,279
Speaker 2: they are are incredible exactly how they are, and we

1000
00:46:53,320 --> 00:46:56,279
Speaker 2: can respect and love each other and like applaud and

1001
00:46:56,360 --> 00:46:59,480
Speaker 2: uplift each other, cause I think that would change a lot.

1002
00:47:00,040 --> 00:47:03,360
Speaker 2: I love that, and I love this and with you

1003
00:47:03,600 --> 00:47:08,480
Speaker 2: me too, this platform. Thank you for this natural conversation,

1004
00:47:08,640 --> 00:47:11,360
Speaker 2: and thank you for just being such a supporter of

1005
00:47:11,480 --> 00:47:16,480
Speaker 2: me and the art and so adore you. I appreciate you.

1006
00:47:16,520 --> 00:47:22,280
Speaker 1: Thank you, Alicia Keys, everybody, Hey, how so dame here

1007
00:47:23,160 --> 00:47:24,920
Speaker 1: on my show wh