1
00:00:00,720 --> 00:00:01,560
Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam.

2
00:00:01,639 --> 00:00:04,360
Speaker 2: This is John the OG story Time podcast host.

3
00:00:04,360 --> 00:00:06,200
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, we got some great stories coming up.

4
00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:08,639
Speaker 3: But before that, we get a teeny two minute break

5
00:00:08,680 --> 00:00:11,600
Speaker 3: from the sponsors that keep this show propped up like

6
00:00:11,600 --> 00:00:14,840
Speaker 3: a little house. Oh you a person close to me

7
00:00:15,080 --> 00:00:17,200
Speaker 3: sabotaged my session with a matchmaker.

8
00:00:17,360 --> 00:00:20,720
Speaker 2: Oh man, I can totally see that happening. Uh, you

9
00:00:20,760 --> 00:00:23,200
Speaker 2: got to ask yourself, is this person wanting me to

10
00:00:23,239 --> 00:00:25,560
Speaker 2: stay single so I'll remain their friend? You gotta just

11
00:00:25,600 --> 00:00:26,880
Speaker 2: go with your own gut feeling on that.

12
00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:30,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, so quick background. A couple of months ago, I

13
00:00:30,600 --> 00:00:33,680
Speaker 3: forty two mail just got a rather large financial windfall,

14
00:00:33,840 --> 00:00:38,239
Speaker 3: literally fu money. Unfortunately, the dating prospects happened to improve

15
00:00:38,360 --> 00:00:41,440
Speaker 3: since then. Money always doesn't always help in that sense,

16
00:00:41,560 --> 00:00:43,640
Speaker 3: so I enlisted the help of a matchmaker with a

17
00:00:43,640 --> 00:00:46,280
Speaker 3: good track record. By the way, this comes from Accomplished

18
00:00:46,280 --> 00:00:48,479
Speaker 3: Gas twenty seven eighty two. And if you want to

19
00:00:48,479 --> 00:00:50,560
Speaker 3: submit your own stories, go to the r slash Okay

20
00:00:50,640 --> 00:00:53,239
Speaker 3: Storytime suburt it. I'm Sophia, I'm.

21
00:00:53,080 --> 00:00:56,240
Speaker 1: Leslie Wardman, and I'm Keon and Yes, today's guest is

22
00:00:56,320 --> 00:01:00,000
Speaker 1: Leslie Wardman, the founder of Ambiance Matchmaking, which he launched

23
00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:03,160
Speaker 1: in two thousand and two, after decades inside the matchmaking industry.

24
00:01:03,360 --> 00:01:06,040
Speaker 1: After working as a matchmaker and director for an international

25
00:01:06,040 --> 00:01:10,000
Speaker 1: firm in the nineties, Leslie realized something was missing, real depth, intention,

26
00:01:10,280 --> 00:01:13,920
Speaker 1: and a truly personal approach. That insight became Beyonce Matchmaking,

27
00:01:14,360 --> 00:01:17,120
Speaker 1: which is a boutique service designed for conscious leaders, creatives,

28
00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:20,400
Speaker 1: and entrepreneurs who want meaningful and lasting connections. Welcome to

29
00:01:20,440 --> 00:01:21,400
Speaker 1: the show, Leslie.

30
00:01:21,200 --> 00:01:23,840
Speaker 3: Thankah, thank you for joining me. Yeah, and Leslie's going

31
00:01:23,880 --> 00:01:26,720
Speaker 3: to help us read these stories today and give some advice.

32
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:28,479
Speaker 2: Awesome, Ohpi says.

33
00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:31,440
Speaker 3: My parents live with me, so we share expenses. But

34
00:01:31,520 --> 00:01:34,039
Speaker 3: I am only doing so now because I am having

35
00:01:34,040 --> 00:01:36,880
Speaker 3: a house I bought renovated and it's more economical to

36
00:01:36,920 --> 00:01:39,480
Speaker 3: stay with them instead of wasting money renting a place

37
00:01:39,560 --> 00:01:41,520
Speaker 3: while I wait for the work to be completed. I

38
00:01:41,600 --> 00:01:44,520
Speaker 3: jokingly mentioned to my father the day before my appointment

39
00:01:44,560 --> 00:01:47,160
Speaker 3: with the matchmaker, I hope she doesn't twist certain things

40
00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:49,480
Speaker 3: about myself for topics I bring up to make it

41
00:01:49,520 --> 00:01:52,000
Speaker 3: look like I'm a bad potential match That would be

42
00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:52,920
Speaker 3: my worst nightmare.

43
00:01:53,240 --> 00:01:57,760
Speaker 2: So so that would be your worst matchmaker too, Yeatly,

44
00:01:58,320 --> 00:02:00,840
Speaker 2: I honestly wouldn't mention that you would your parents, even

45
00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:04,680
Speaker 2: maybe temporarily. It's not exactly a selling point, but uh,

46
00:02:04,760 --> 00:02:06,640
Speaker 2: the right matchmaker would know how to frame that make

47
00:02:06,720 --> 00:02:07,680
Speaker 2: you look splendid.

48
00:02:07,840 --> 00:02:11,359
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would know why the matchmaker would intentionally make

49
00:02:11,400 --> 00:02:13,880
Speaker 3: you look worse. So I go see this young woman

50
00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:16,560
Speaker 3: after I filled out a rather long questionnaire about what

51
00:02:16,639 --> 00:02:18,919
Speaker 3: I did for work, what I like, bobbies, et cetera.

52
00:02:19,200 --> 00:02:21,600
Speaker 3: I should have known something was off when she asked

53
00:02:21,639 --> 00:02:24,200
Speaker 3: me as the first question, what do you notice about

54
00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:27,040
Speaker 3: the difference between what other men say about your appearance

55
00:02:27,240 --> 00:02:27,880
Speaker 3: versus women?

56
00:02:28,360 --> 00:02:33,080
Speaker 2: Wow, that is a trippy question. Men are more complimentary.

57
00:02:33,120 --> 00:02:37,120
Speaker 2: I would say, probably not gonna be as truthful as

58
00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:39,240
Speaker 2: your friend perhaps or other women.

59
00:02:39,560 --> 00:02:42,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, I told her the truth that men usually make

60
00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:46,040
Speaker 3: the disparaging remarks. Well, women usually say you're decent looking dude,

61
00:02:46,080 --> 00:02:48,480
Speaker 3: not sure why you don't have someone, especially now without

62
00:02:48,520 --> 00:02:52,000
Speaker 3: being financially shackled. She then said, I'm gonna tell you straight.

63
00:02:52,200 --> 00:02:54,200
Speaker 3: Many of my female clients are going to look at

64
00:02:54,200 --> 00:02:56,600
Speaker 3: your photos and say, he seriously thinks he can get

65
00:02:56,600 --> 00:02:59,280
Speaker 3: me just because he came into a financial windfall, just

66
00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:01,880
Speaker 3: being quit blunt.

67
00:03:02,240 --> 00:03:05,440
Speaker 2: I gotta say matchmakers, they can get a little bit

68
00:03:05,520 --> 00:03:09,680
Speaker 2: intense inside their heads, and they start to feel like

69
00:03:09,720 --> 00:03:13,600
Speaker 2: a certain amount of authority and they can trip out

70
00:03:13,639 --> 00:03:17,840
Speaker 2: over dominating things that they don't understand necessarily, So I

71
00:03:17,840 --> 00:03:21,920
Speaker 2: wouldn't take it too seriously. Yeah, I'm questioning who this was?

72
00:03:21,919 --> 00:03:24,799
Speaker 2: Was there? Okay, go ahead, She's.

73
00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:28,520
Speaker 3: Not very good. Okay, she mentions a few women on Instagram.

74
00:03:28,639 --> 00:03:31,440
Speaker 3: I showed her earlier as a sample of who I like, saying,

75
00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:33,640
Speaker 3: do you really think they would go for you just

76
00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:36,280
Speaker 3: because you're subtly wealthy? Now, let me ask you, do

77
00:03:36,360 --> 00:03:38,400
Speaker 3: you go to the gym at all? This seems like

78
00:03:38,440 --> 00:03:43,200
Speaker 3: a really blunt, kind of mean person. I feel like,

79
00:03:43,680 --> 00:03:47,360
Speaker 3: I don't know what's your approach when you're talking to

80
00:03:47,440 --> 00:03:48,080
Speaker 3: new clients.

81
00:03:48,160 --> 00:03:51,440
Speaker 2: Okay, well, actually, in our agreements, it just says you

82
00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:53,960
Speaker 2: need to be a nice person. Yeah, basically, you have

83
00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:55,400
Speaker 2: to be nice to your matches. You have to be

84
00:03:55,480 --> 00:03:58,160
Speaker 2: nice to us. And if somebody whips out like some

85
00:03:58,200 --> 00:04:03,080
Speaker 2: sort of argument like that is disrespectful, we immediately will

86
00:04:03,440 --> 00:04:05,800
Speaker 2: like not take them as a client or point to

87
00:04:05,840 --> 00:04:07,920
Speaker 2: the door. Yeah, I mean, it's just not a good

88
00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:09,400
Speaker 2: way to be. And we if they treat us like that,

89
00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:11,160
Speaker 2: we know they're gonna treat their matches like that, so

90
00:04:11,240 --> 00:04:12,360
Speaker 2: it's just forget about it.

91
00:04:12,440 --> 00:04:14,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, it doesn't do well for your business if you're

92
00:04:14,280 --> 00:04:17,240
Speaker 3: sending people. Yeah, I told her, since the windfall, I

93
00:04:17,240 --> 00:04:19,240
Speaker 3: have been going a lot more than I did before.

94
00:04:19,480 --> 00:04:22,359
Speaker 3: So what she replied, which translate to you just started

95
00:04:22,400 --> 00:04:25,400
Speaker 3: when you got that windfall. I answered her questions honestly,

96
00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:28,160
Speaker 3: and the result was her pashing me. Here is a

97
00:04:28,200 --> 00:04:30,320
Speaker 3: summary of what I dealt with. She asked me why

98
00:04:30,440 --> 00:04:34,240
Speaker 3: Comcast gets such a bad rep in customer service. Her response,

99
00:04:34,560 --> 00:04:37,440
Speaker 3: you consider it poor customer service to reserve their best

100
00:04:37,480 --> 00:04:40,400
Speaker 3: and fastest service for their biggest spenders. Good thing you

101
00:04:40,400 --> 00:04:42,480
Speaker 3: didn't go to school for business because you would have

102
00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:44,719
Speaker 3: flunked out. That's such a specific question.

103
00:04:45,800 --> 00:04:47,479
Speaker 2: Are you serious this really happened?

104
00:04:47,760 --> 00:04:49,080
Speaker 3: This is crazy, this.

105
00:04:49,080 --> 00:04:54,360
Speaker 2: Greenish all time? Wow, my goodness, Yeah, Ley's moment, I'd

106
00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:54,920
Speaker 2: be out of their sea.

107
00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:57,039
Speaker 3: I'd be like, I don't think you're actually helping me.

108
00:04:57,120 --> 00:04:59,240
Speaker 3: You're just making me feel worse about myself.

109
00:04:59,360 --> 00:05:01,280
Speaker 2: That's pretty hard. I mean, the money didn't hurt, that's

110
00:05:01,279 --> 00:05:04,080
Speaker 2: for sure, but it's not something to base a relationship on.

111
00:05:04,240 --> 00:05:07,600
Speaker 2: And we don't take gold diggers as clients by the way, Yeah.

112
00:05:07,279 --> 00:05:09,640
Speaker 3: I told her, I'm a car guy, but one vehicle

113
00:05:09,720 --> 00:05:13,080
Speaker 3: I wouldn't buy is a Ferrari. Her response, that's because

114
00:05:13,120 --> 00:05:16,320
Speaker 3: Ferrari's standards. They don't just let any dope with money

115
00:05:16,360 --> 00:05:18,520
Speaker 3: like yourself walk in and think you can buy whatever

116
00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:20,679
Speaker 3: you want. What this person?

117
00:05:21,240 --> 00:05:23,160
Speaker 1: What this is like a professional hater? Now?

118
00:05:23,360 --> 00:05:27,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, it feels like you like accidentally got one of

119
00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:29,360
Speaker 3: those people that's like paid to be mean to you

120
00:05:29,520 --> 00:05:31,200
Speaker 3: instead of matchmaker.

121
00:05:31,279 --> 00:05:32,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's incredibly abusive.

122
00:05:33,240 --> 00:05:33,480
Speaker 1: Yeah.

123
00:05:33,640 --> 00:05:35,760
Speaker 2: Is her hair really dark? I don't want to name

124
00:05:35,800 --> 00:05:36,240
Speaker 2: any names.

125
00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:37,080
Speaker 3: I'm just so Yeah.

126
00:05:37,120 --> 00:05:39,760
Speaker 2: I knows it's her, Okay.

127
00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:43,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, No, I don't know's.

128
00:05:42,440 --> 00:05:45,599
Speaker 1: There's there's someone that's known for doing this.

129
00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:48,960
Speaker 2: Yeah okay, yes, yes, that's good to know.

130
00:05:49,360 --> 00:05:50,760
Speaker 1: And she's people like her.

131
00:05:51,720 --> 00:05:53,800
Speaker 2: You know what they say, no drama, no TV so

132
00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:55,600
Speaker 2: oh yes, yes, show god.

133
00:05:56,720 --> 00:05:58,640
Speaker 1: Oh okay, yeah.

134
00:05:59,200 --> 00:06:01,120
Speaker 3: I told her a buck a stream of mine is

135
00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:03,560
Speaker 3: to start a band where the genre is hard rock

136
00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:06,640
Speaker 3: to symphonic metal. Her responds the fact that you're willing

137
00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:09,080
Speaker 3: to blow money to start a band where the genre

138
00:06:09,200 --> 00:06:13,120
Speaker 3: isn't popular here shows you don't treat your windfall with respect.

139
00:06:13,760 --> 00:06:16,040
Speaker 3: It doesn't seem like you can catch a break. You're like,

140
00:06:16,040 --> 00:06:17,920
Speaker 3: I wouldn't buy it ferrari, and she's like, well, they

141
00:06:17,920 --> 00:06:20,560
Speaker 3: wouldn't even take you anyway. And then you're like, I

142
00:06:20,600 --> 00:06:22,160
Speaker 3: want to spend a little bit of money on this

143
00:06:22,240 --> 00:06:24,400
Speaker 3: band thing, and you're like, well, why are you wasting

144
00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:27,200
Speaker 3: your money? So I don't know what she wants from you.

145
00:06:27,720 --> 00:06:30,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, next, yeah.

146
00:06:30,120 --> 00:06:31,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, you just gotta keep going down the line. She

147
00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:34,160
Speaker 3: asked me if body hair on a woman is a turnoff.

148
00:06:34,320 --> 00:06:36,560
Speaker 3: I was honest and said that armpit hair is a

149
00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:39,000
Speaker 3: gross out level one, and I would tell my partner,

150
00:06:39,240 --> 00:06:42,080
Speaker 3: no fun, spicy bedroom time until your pits make a

151
00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:45,239
Speaker 3: date with wax razor or laser. That's kind of weird.

152
00:06:45,960 --> 00:06:48,920
Speaker 3: I understand if you're like not super into hair, but

153
00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:52,320
Speaker 3: like to be like until you shame. Yeah, you can't

154
00:06:52,360 --> 00:06:52,960
Speaker 3: sleep with me.

155
00:06:53,440 --> 00:06:55,960
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, And I mean everybody's got their own thing.

156
00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:59,120
Speaker 2: There's still breakers a mile long. But he's obviously not.

157
00:06:59,160 --> 00:06:59,599
Speaker 2: In your.

158
00:07:01,760 --> 00:07:04,520
Speaker 3: Her response, it's a little unsettling that you would insist

159
00:07:04,600 --> 00:07:07,599
Speaker 3: that your of age partner look pretty pubescent. She noticed

160
00:07:07,640 --> 00:07:10,080
Speaker 3: that my preference is for bigger, tested women, so she

161
00:07:10,200 --> 00:07:12,400
Speaker 3: asked me what I would do if my potential partner

162
00:07:12,480 --> 00:07:17,000
Speaker 3: tested positive for the BRCA gene and wanted amseectomy. That's

163
00:07:17,040 --> 00:07:24,040
Speaker 3: such a specific, like random, I don't know, hypothetical, I

164
00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:24,520
Speaker 3: don't know.

165
00:07:24,920 --> 00:07:27,920
Speaker 2: We kind of advocate being open minded. I mean, clients

166
00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:29,200
Speaker 2: have the best success.

167
00:07:29,080 --> 00:07:32,760
Speaker 3: Absolutely, do you ask, like hypotheticals.

168
00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:34,440
Speaker 2: Like this are uh no, kind.

169
00:07:34,280 --> 00:07:35,680
Speaker 3: Of feel like very specific.

170
00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:39,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's like above and beyond. Yeah, And honestly that

171
00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:41,480
Speaker 2: just kind of indicates a closed mind and kind of

172
00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:42,679
Speaker 2: random deal breakers.

173
00:07:42,720 --> 00:07:45,840
Speaker 1: So yeah, is that a common thing where well, obviously

174
00:07:45,880 --> 00:07:49,280
Speaker 1: males were like I want blonde, I want this kind

175
00:07:49,280 --> 00:07:51,480
Speaker 1: of standard, and then obviously women be like I want

176
00:07:51,560 --> 00:07:54,320
Speaker 1: someone who's six' five in business blue. Eyes.

177
00:07:54,600 --> 00:07:59,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, sometimes you, KNOW i love it, WHEN i,

178
00:07:59,080 --> 00:08:01,920
Speaker 2: mean we do work with highly accomplished, PEOPLE i gotta.

179
00:08:01,960 --> 00:08:05,320
Speaker 2: Confess BUT i love it when like somebody comes in

180
00:08:05,480 --> 00:08:07,600
Speaker 2: and they have everything in the world going for, them you,

181
00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:10,360
Speaker 2: know and even they're humble about, it and they don't

182
00:08:10,400 --> 00:08:13,040
Speaker 2: have all these like. Restrictions they're, like you, know their

183
00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:15,800
Speaker 2: heights doesn't, matter it doesn't matter if they have, money and,

184
00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:19,040
Speaker 2: LIKE i love that so. Much it just makes it

185
00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:21,640
Speaker 2: appear that they're, not you, know having too may. Standards

186
00:08:21,680 --> 00:08:24,480
Speaker 2: they think outside of the box and their chances of

187
00:08:24,480 --> 00:08:25,960
Speaker 2: finding success are much.

188
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:28,760
Speaker 3: Better, yeah, absolutely if you have an open. MIND i

189
00:08:28,840 --> 00:08:31,520
Speaker 3: let her KNOW i wouldn't like her chopping her healthy

190
00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:35,520
Speaker 3: chest off because of a test with known questions about its.

191
00:08:35,559 --> 00:08:38,959
Speaker 3: Accuracy her, Response, so in other, words you would value

192
00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:41,280
Speaker 3: her chest more than. Her she asked me if a

193
00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:43,320
Speaker 3: partner wanted to wear a low cut top or a

194
00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:45,680
Speaker 3: short skirt out in, public WOULD i be okay with?

195
00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:47,800
Speaker 3: IT i told her, yes BECAUSE i know that other

196
00:08:47,800 --> 00:08:49,600
Speaker 3: guys may, look But i'm the one she comes home,

197
00:08:49,640 --> 00:08:52,280
Speaker 3: to so she can wear whatever she. Wants, also policing

198
00:08:52,280 --> 00:08:55,160
Speaker 3: out a partner dresses is almost always a precursor to

199
00:08:55,200 --> 00:08:57,320
Speaker 3: being harmful, later AND i don't want to be that.

200
00:08:57,400 --> 00:09:01,240
Speaker 3: Guy her response is that genuine or affront where you

201
00:09:01,320 --> 00:09:04,240
Speaker 3: do all the right things so she doesn't see the mistreatment.

202
00:09:04,320 --> 00:09:08,320
Speaker 3: Coming you are getting, like this is not an, Interview

203
00:09:08,440 --> 00:09:12,600
Speaker 3: this is an. Interrogation did you see? Injurviews, yeah this

204
00:09:12,679 --> 00:09:13,520
Speaker 3: is an interrogation.

205
00:09:13,600 --> 00:09:15,760
Speaker 2: Here that's, cute but there's a valid point in, There

206
00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:16,920
Speaker 2: like you don't want a controlling?

207
00:09:16,960 --> 00:09:17,120
Speaker 1: Guy?

208
00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:21,520
Speaker 2: Nothing yeah, right, no absolutely obviously insecure in. There oh, yeah.

209
00:09:21,679 --> 00:09:25,280
Speaker 3: Yeah one of my deal breakers is cigarette. Smoking and

210
00:09:25,320 --> 00:09:26,920
Speaker 3: she asked me If i'm willing to let it. GO

211
00:09:27,280 --> 00:09:30,560
Speaker 3: i said, no BECAUSE i know within six months In

212
00:09:30,840 --> 00:09:32,840
Speaker 3: i'll ask her to quit for. Me should DEMAND i

213
00:09:32,880 --> 00:09:35,560
Speaker 3: give up SOMETHING i, Like i'll, refuse and that will

214
00:09:35,559 --> 00:09:38,040
Speaker 3: be the beginning of the. End she responded by, saying

215
00:09:38,240 --> 00:09:41,440
Speaker 3: your vice is clearly, corn and you actually go to

216
00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:44,240
Speaker 3: the expo to take pics with your favorite. Performance what

217
00:09:44,320 --> 00:09:46,280
Speaker 3: if she asked you to give that? UP i, Said

218
00:09:46,640 --> 00:09:51,560
Speaker 3: does corn cause lung, cancer rotting, TEETH, copd fesima or,

219
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:55,280
Speaker 3: emphysema heart, disease prematurely aging, skin and all the other

220
00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:59,320
Speaker 3: physical health issues that is associated with cigarette? Smoking mm, Hmm,

221
00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:03,120
Speaker 3: no SO i wouldn't her, Response some might say that

222
00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:06,640
Speaker 3: corn is in some ways worse for society than cigarettes. Are,

223
00:10:07,360 --> 00:10:10,960
Speaker 3: well that's just kind of like a broader. DISCUSSION i

224
00:10:10,960 --> 00:10:14,040
Speaker 3: don't feel like we're just getting into these BROAD i.

225
00:10:13,920 --> 00:10:15,280
Speaker 1: Feel like it's getting very.

226
00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:19,320
Speaker 3: Semantic yeah, yeah it's, like, well, actually have you thought

227
00:10:19,320 --> 00:10:21,160
Speaker 3: about the broader repercussions of.

228
00:10:21,200 --> 00:10:24,040
Speaker 1: Corn there's a lot of tick for tack with this. Matchmaker.

229
00:10:24,600 --> 00:10:26,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah she's definitely a. TRIP i gotta. Say we

230
00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:30,120
Speaker 2: do have on our interview. Page what are their thoughts about,

231
00:10:30,160 --> 00:10:33,360
Speaker 2: smoking and that's typically the number one deal breaker that makes.

232
00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:35,679
Speaker 2: Sense never say, never, Though Like i've heard of one

233
00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:39,319
Speaker 2: person that their person never criticized them for smoking when

234
00:10:39,320 --> 00:10:43,160
Speaker 2: they first, met and she ended up quitting just. Automatically

235
00:10:43,200 --> 00:10:44,600
Speaker 2: LIKE i don't know if she's because she fell in

236
00:10:44,640 --> 00:10:47,120
Speaker 2: love and didn't need it, anymore but, uh we don't

237
00:10:47,120 --> 00:10:50,600
Speaker 2: have on our interviews, sheets But i've heard of. It one,

238
00:10:50,640 --> 00:10:52,920
Speaker 2: time one of the matches that we got together was

239
00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:56,400
Speaker 2: a successful, one except months down the road he came off.

240
00:10:56,440 --> 00:10:59,000
Speaker 2: Hold they're allowed to go on hold if there want

241
00:10:59,040 --> 00:11:01,400
Speaker 2: to see where it goes with a certain. Person and

242
00:11:01,960 --> 00:11:04,560
Speaker 2: the reason he came off hold and he broke up

243
00:11:04,600 --> 00:11:06,800
Speaker 2: with hers because she had she had a porn. Problem,

244
00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:08,440
Speaker 2: SORRY i don't know if it's funny or.

245
00:11:08,440 --> 00:11:10,520
Speaker 3: Not but, well, NO i, mean LIKE i feel like

246
00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:13,520
Speaker 3: some It's it's definitely a thing THAT i don't think

247
00:11:13,520 --> 00:11:16,679
Speaker 3: people bring up as like a first date, thing but it.

248
00:11:16,760 --> 00:11:19,640
Speaker 3: Is it can become pretty problematic for some. COUPLES i, Think.

249
00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:21,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay it did come up one other. Time it

250
00:11:21,440 --> 00:11:25,480
Speaker 2: was ended up being a. Preacher oh, dude now we're

251
00:11:25,520 --> 00:11:29,120
Speaker 2: talking that's.

252
00:11:29,160 --> 00:11:34,200
Speaker 3: Crazy, well she then asked me WHY i put down

253
00:11:34,240 --> 00:11:37,560
Speaker 3: my desired age range from twenty six to thirty three

254
00:11:37,679 --> 00:11:39,920
Speaker 3: When i'm forty. Two well that's.

255
00:11:40,280 --> 00:11:44,360
Speaker 1: Okay, SEE i feel LIKE i think there's some qualms

256
00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:45,600
Speaker 1: with op here as.

257
00:11:45,640 --> 00:11:48,079
Speaker 3: Well, YEAH i do think peace flaws are showing up a.

258
00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:52,160
Speaker 1: Little it's the, yeah. Okay he kind of diverted when

259
00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:55,800
Speaker 1: she when the matchmaker asked him about, corn he was, like, well,

260
00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:58,040
Speaker 1: yeah doesn't do. This it wasn't, like, okay, well IF

261
00:11:58,080 --> 00:11:59,480
Speaker 1: i was asked to stop doing, IT i would do.

262
00:11:59,520 --> 00:12:02,080
Speaker 1: It and also he's, LIKE i like my women. Younger

263
00:12:02,120 --> 00:12:04,959
Speaker 1: but also, no IF i see, one arn't it, hair

264
00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:05,680
Speaker 1: it's done.

265
00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:08,920
Speaker 3: Done do you see a lot of or, like do

266
00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:11,800
Speaker 3: a lot of people come into you asking for you,

267
00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:13,199
Speaker 3: know their age range is much?

268
00:12:13,240 --> 00:12:17,319
Speaker 2: Lower, yeah but, honestly that pendulum has swung quite a

269
00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:18,920
Speaker 2: bit in the last ten, years and a lot of

270
00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:23,560
Speaker 2: women are wanting. YOUNGER i, mean it makes biological, sense

271
00:12:23,679 --> 00:12:26,200
Speaker 2: and we did try to keep it within five or

272
00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:29,079
Speaker 2: ten years one way or the. Other but if a

273
00:12:29,120 --> 00:12:32,680
Speaker 2: guy gets too over the, top, again it's there's the,

274
00:12:32,760 --> 00:12:35,200
Speaker 2: door you, know and let's still, like you, know let

275
00:12:35,280 --> 00:12:37,079
Speaker 2: us talk some sense into, them because some of them

276
00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:39,160
Speaker 2: just can't get the fifties out of their mind or.

277
00:12:39,160 --> 00:12:41,280
Speaker 2: Something but that's just not where we are in.

278
00:12:41,320 --> 00:12:43,280
Speaker 1: This. Yeah, YEAH i was gonna, say do you ever

279
00:12:43,400 --> 00:12:47,719
Speaker 1: just like cold water, Them, Like, hey do you realize

280
00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:50,400
Speaker 1: you're here for a. Reason it's because your standards are

281
00:12:50,440 --> 00:12:52,760
Speaker 1: way too high or you're asking for too much in a. Partner,

282
00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:55,760
Speaker 1: yeah lower the you, know lower the bar just a little,

283
00:12:55,800 --> 00:12:58,600
Speaker 1: bit because, yeah obviously it's not. Working, no that's WHAT.

284
00:12:58,559 --> 00:13:00,680
Speaker 2: I call the mental. Toolkit you know that all the.

285
00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:03,720
Speaker 2: Time and if they're, adamant then they're probably not gonna

286
00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:07,720
Speaker 2: end up being an. Ambiancelient but, SURE i gotta be careful.

287
00:13:07,760 --> 00:13:09,839
Speaker 2: Sometimes LIKE i was a GUY i wanted to be

288
00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:12,480
Speaker 2: a client a couple of weeks, AGO i, mean and

289
00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:14,360
Speaker 2: he was so nice and had it all together and.

290
00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:18,079
Speaker 2: Stuff but he's in this seventies and he's, like, oh,

291
00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:21,360
Speaker 2: Yeah i've got a, baby And i'm like a fur. Baby,

292
00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:25,880
Speaker 2: Yeah mike jaw dropped WHEN i finally realized he was.

293
00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:27,800
Speaker 2: Serious he had a baby and. Stuff so, yeah that

294
00:13:27,880 --> 00:13:28,760
Speaker 2: wasn't gonna be a.

295
00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:29,000
Speaker 3: Het.

296
00:13:29,160 --> 00:13:30,360
Speaker 2: Now can't work with.

297
00:13:30,400 --> 00:13:33,720
Speaker 3: That, yeah it's, HARD i told her because quite, honestly

298
00:13:33,720 --> 00:13:35,800
Speaker 3: a younger woman is more likely to focus on the

299
00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:38,240
Speaker 3: here and now when there is concern a woman in

300
00:13:38,280 --> 00:13:40,680
Speaker 3: her forties would focus too much on the pre windfall

301
00:13:40,760 --> 00:13:43,640
Speaker 3: chapter of my, life which is now. Closed her, response

302
00:13:44,080 --> 00:13:46,000
Speaker 3: you just don't want a woman who might balk at the.

303
00:13:46,040 --> 00:13:47,760
Speaker 3: Face it took a windfall to get you out of

304
00:13:47,800 --> 00:13:51,960
Speaker 3: your parents' house at the age of forty. Two not

305
00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:54,680
Speaker 3: everything she's saying is a, lie but like it, IS

306
00:13:54,880 --> 00:13:57,600
Speaker 3: i think too harsh when you're a professional who's been

307
00:13:57,640 --> 00:13:59,839
Speaker 3: hired for a. Job THAT'S i, Think.

308
00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:04,280
Speaker 2: Yeah this, guy he probably needs therapy and not matchmaking right, NOW.

309
00:14:04,240 --> 00:14:07,400
Speaker 3: I think, so and definitely not this matchmaker at this. Point,

310
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:11,200
Speaker 3: YEAH i have. ENOUGH i let her KNOW i Think

311
00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:14,800
Speaker 3: i'm being horn, affected basically like the halo, effect but the.

312
00:14:14,800 --> 00:14:17,400
Speaker 3: OPPOSITE i told her that because she had a negative

313
00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:21,400
Speaker 3: impression of my, appearance she carried that negativity into EVERYTHING i.

314
00:14:21,520 --> 00:14:24,200
Speaker 3: Said she, said that's. RIDICULOUS i got up to, leave

315
00:14:24,240 --> 00:14:26,840
Speaker 3: BUT i had to. Ask IF i wasn't horn, affected

316
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:29,920
Speaker 3: then this was. Sabotage it's very weird how you asked

317
00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:33,520
Speaker 3: those questions in, particular then bashed me for my honest.

318
00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:36,880
Speaker 3: Answers unless someone told you to ask those, questions then

319
00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:39,680
Speaker 3: bash me for my. Answers that's when she admitted, it,

320
00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:43,400
Speaker 3: saying someone close to you called my private line last

321
00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:46,560
Speaker 3: night and told me to ask you certain questions and

322
00:14:46,640 --> 00:14:48,880
Speaker 3: find a way to have a problem with everything you

323
00:14:48,960 --> 00:14:51,120
Speaker 3: said and make it look like you're not even first date,

324
00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:56,200
Speaker 3: material much less boyfriend material after what this person told. Me,

325
00:14:56,360 --> 00:14:58,440
Speaker 3: sorry BUT i can't set someone like that up with.

326
00:14:58,480 --> 00:15:00,440
Speaker 3: Anyone then why would you even take the?

327
00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:04,440
Speaker 1: Client, yeah maybe they were paid by someone who was

328
00:15:04,440 --> 00:15:06,000
Speaker 1: close to, them but That, YEAH.

329
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:08,400
Speaker 2: I got to, say there's matchmakers out there that will

330
00:15:08,560 --> 00:15:12,520
Speaker 2: like there's they're more obsessed with themselves than they're. Science,

331
00:15:12,640 --> 00:15:15,280
Speaker 2: yeah and they will take the money without having the

332
00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:17,520
Speaker 2: tunnel vision enough to know if they can match. THEM i,

333
00:15:17,520 --> 00:15:19,480
Speaker 2: mean it's super important to get like on it even

334
00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:22,520
Speaker 2: before you let them sign the, agreement because you got

335
00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:24,800
Speaker 2: to factor everything. In we screened the you know what

336
00:15:24,960 --> 00:15:27,880
Speaker 2: out of. Everybody they got to fill out, form then

337
00:15:27,920 --> 00:15:30,200
Speaker 2: fill out a bigger, form and then they go through

338
00:15:30,240 --> 00:15:32,280
Speaker 2: like an hour hour and a half a long interview

339
00:15:32,320 --> 00:15:35,680
Speaker 2: with us online and, stuff and we just it's a friendly,

340
00:15:35,720 --> 00:15:38,280
Speaker 2: interrogation but we just make sure they're. Matchable and then

341
00:15:38,760 --> 00:15:40,920
Speaker 2: during that Like i'll dive into OUR crm and Then

342
00:15:40,960 --> 00:15:43,920
Speaker 2: i've set up an international platform WHERE i network with

343
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:47,240
Speaker 2: other matchmakers THAT i hold in high regard and yeahs,

344
00:15:47,240 --> 00:15:49,920
Speaker 2: cool but yeah, no, yeah it's such a.

345
00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:50,280
Speaker 3: Bummer.

346
00:15:50,320 --> 00:15:52,560
Speaker 2: MAN i hear so many stories about people that have

347
00:15:52,680 --> 00:15:55,720
Speaker 2: been with other. MATCHMAKERS i had one come to us

348
00:15:55,920 --> 00:15:59,480
Speaker 2: and she gave a matchmaker that's, ooh we're so. Upscale

349
00:15:59,680 --> 00:16:01,880
Speaker 2: she gave one hundred grand right after her husband. Died

350
00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:04,320
Speaker 2: she was, like in a sad SPACE a hundred grand

351
00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:07,480
Speaker 2: never got one? Match? Wow, yeah do.

352
00:16:07,440 --> 00:16:10,280
Speaker 3: You BECAUSE i don't know too much about the. Matchmaking

353
00:16:10,480 --> 00:16:13,240
Speaker 3: is it, like do you have your like what a

354
00:16:13,280 --> 00:16:16,600
Speaker 3: client for that initial? Interview would they pay for that

355
00:16:16,680 --> 00:16:18,800
Speaker 3: initial interview or is it just we do?

356
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:21,080
Speaker 2: Charge, yeah because you know, what we didn't for the long.

357
00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:23,440
Speaker 2: Time but then you, Know i've got people that do

358
00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:25,680
Speaker 2: interviews for us and they record. Them that's the only

359
00:16:25,720 --> 00:16:27,200
Speaker 2: Way i've figured out how to clone, myself SO i

360
00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:28,720
Speaker 2: can watch the recording and kind of pick up on the,

361
00:16:28,760 --> 00:16:30,800
Speaker 2: vibe not just what's on paper about a person we're

362
00:16:30,880 --> 00:16:33,640
Speaker 2: considering working, with and, uh AND i would see them

363
00:16:33,680 --> 00:16:36,120
Speaker 2: for a while just getting used their, time getting used

364
00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:38,160
Speaker 2: like by the girl who just had her heart broken

365
00:16:38,360 --> 00:16:40,080
Speaker 2: or somebody just really wanted to.

366
00:16:40,040 --> 00:16:41,440
Speaker 3: Talk of a, therapy so thank. You.

367
00:16:41,640 --> 00:16:43,480
Speaker 2: Yeah SO i was, like, okay this is no, more and,

368
00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:45,800
Speaker 2: yeah we start. Charging it's nominal and then we applied

369
00:16:45,840 --> 00:16:47,560
Speaker 2: to their. Membership but it's just the only way to

370
00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:49,160
Speaker 2: protect your, time which is.

371
00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:55,479
Speaker 3: Just like basically charging for a better service, then you. Know, yeah, yeah.

372
00:16:55,120 --> 00:16:57,200
Speaker 2: And it's not like money down the drain or. Anything

373
00:16:57,280 --> 00:16:59,440
Speaker 2: we'll give them like a big wide open view the

374
00:16:59,480 --> 00:17:01,840
Speaker 2: matchmaking world and they might get a little therapy at

375
00:17:01,840 --> 00:17:04,159
Speaker 2: the same. Time, yeah and then even that if it

376
00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:06,480
Speaker 2: doesn't work, out we have a free singles database where

377
00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:09,320
Speaker 2: like not everybody can afford a, matchmaker and they can

378
00:17:09,359 --> 00:17:11,160
Speaker 2: go in, there and we've got a lot of people

379
00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:12,240
Speaker 2: in they're married and they didn't.

380
00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:14,359
Speaker 3: Pay. Yeah, YEAH i feel like it's like we you,

381
00:17:14,359 --> 00:17:16,200
Speaker 3: know like with the dating, apps a lot of dating

382
00:17:16,240 --> 00:17:20,760
Speaker 3: apps have services like like pep paid for, subscriptions so

383
00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:23,600
Speaker 3: it just feels like you're getting an even better version of.

384
00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:24,800
Speaker 3: That so, yeah it makes.

385
00:17:24,800 --> 00:17:27,080
Speaker 2: Sense depending ever compares to a data now, yeah.

386
00:17:26,960 --> 00:17:27,680
Speaker 3: No, No i'm saying you're.

387
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:34,719
Speaker 1: Better question THAT i was gonna, say go ahead and get, that.

388
00:17:35,119 --> 00:17:38,320
Speaker 1: Leslie but have you ever maybe had a session with

389
00:17:38,359 --> 00:17:41,320
Speaker 1: somebody or someone you know in the business and you

390
00:17:41,359 --> 00:17:43,240
Speaker 1: just hear their story and you, SAY i don't think

391
00:17:43,320 --> 00:17:46,159
Speaker 1: you're ready for. This you need to get therapy or

392
00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:49,080
Speaker 1: maybe seek a professional then start dating or is it

393
00:17:49,160 --> 00:17:51,800
Speaker 1: like mixed bag of like you can do this but also,

394
00:17:51,960 --> 00:17:54,359
Speaker 1: therapy but keeping like this is just sometimes you just

395
00:17:54,440 --> 00:17:58,120
Speaker 1: hear something or get someone's context and you're, like, NO

396
00:17:58,480 --> 00:18:00,679
Speaker 1: i don't think you're ready for. This just it's just on.

397
00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:03,800
Speaker 2: Air, yes, okay DEFINITELY i have an answer for. That,

398
00:18:04,119 --> 00:18:07,320
Speaker 2: uh it's kind of like back away. SLOWLY i don't

399
00:18:07,359 --> 00:18:10,520
Speaker 2: get it in their. Face like this matchmaker that we're

400
00:18:10,560 --> 00:18:12,359
Speaker 2: talking about so much for mint, THERE i thought the

401
00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:14,080
Speaker 2: comments gone? By where about? ME i was, like what

402
00:18:14,320 --> 00:18:15,159
Speaker 2: but about? Her?

403
00:18:15,240 --> 00:18:15,400
Speaker 3: Right?

404
00:18:19,960 --> 00:18:22,920
Speaker 2: Yeah. No you know What i'll, do or have our

405
00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:26,080
Speaker 2: directors do is just tell. Them, well if it's the,

406
00:18:26,119 --> 00:18:27,920
Speaker 2: directors they're, like, okay well we're gonna have a team

407
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:30,040
Speaker 2: meeting and, we'll you, know figure out if this is

408
00:18:30,040 --> 00:18:32,439
Speaker 2: a good fit or. Not and it basically will do

409
00:18:32,560 --> 00:18:35,280
Speaker 2: that and then we might get too, busy you, know

410
00:18:35,480 --> 00:18:37,639
Speaker 2: stuff like. That BUT i don't want To it's not

411
00:18:37,760 --> 00:18:40,200
Speaker 2: up to me to tell. Somebody we work with people

412
00:18:40,280 --> 00:18:42,159
Speaker 2: like a lot of them have, spent you, know a

413
00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:44,000
Speaker 2: lot of time in, therapy and a lot of them

414
00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:47,639
Speaker 2: were raised perfectly and don't need. Therapy and you, know

415
00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:50,640
Speaker 2: there's just like all. Types BUT i don't think it's

416
00:18:50,640 --> 00:18:53,320
Speaker 2: my position to tell some that's you, KNOW i don't

417
00:18:53,359 --> 00:18:55,560
Speaker 2: like hurting people's, feelings and some people might take that,

418
00:18:55,640 --> 00:18:57,400
Speaker 2: personally but we all could use a little.

419
00:18:57,440 --> 00:19:00,320
Speaker 3: Therapy, yeah, yeah that's. True but we've got a little

420
00:19:00,320 --> 00:19:03,720
Speaker 3: bit more to This, Storyeah so hope he just found

421
00:19:03,720 --> 00:19:08,840
Speaker 3: out that someone sabotaged his matchmaking. SESSION i knew right

422
00:19:08,920 --> 00:19:12,520
Speaker 3: away who. Called the night, BEFORE i intentionally left her

423
00:19:12,600 --> 00:19:15,560
Speaker 3: private line out in the open where my parents could see,

424
00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:17,719
Speaker 3: it thinking they could put in a good word if

425
00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:21,679
Speaker 3: they found. Out, well they. DIDN'T i got home and

426
00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:25,359
Speaker 3: my mother asked how the matchmaker meeting. WENT i was.

427
00:19:25,560 --> 00:19:28,520
Speaker 3: LIVING i demanded to know why she would sabotage the.

428
00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:30,520
Speaker 3: Meeting my mom, SAID i don't know what you're talking.

429
00:19:30,520 --> 00:19:33,359
Speaker 3: About that's when my dad came out and, said that's

430
00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:34,439
Speaker 3: BECAUSE i made that.

431
00:19:34,640 --> 00:19:37,040
Speaker 1: Call oh it was a, Twish.

432
00:19:36,520 --> 00:19:38,760
Speaker 2: Wow why super messed?

433
00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:41,640
Speaker 3: Up my mom looked, surprised, saying what did you. Do

434
00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:43,960
Speaker 3: that's when my dad said to, me maybe don't tell

435
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,760
Speaker 3: your father you would be willing to withhold intimacy if

436
00:19:46,760 --> 00:19:49,760
Speaker 3: your partner doesn't groom to your, standards or that you

437
00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:52,479
Speaker 3: would refuse to let your partner get amosectomy because if

438
00:19:52,520 --> 00:19:55,000
Speaker 3: she had a nice set OF d or DOUBLE d,

439
00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:57,400
Speaker 3: cups you wouldn't want to lose them over a stupid

440
00:19:57,480 --> 00:20:01,240
Speaker 3: test with known questions about its. Accuracy you claim korn

441
00:20:01,359 --> 00:20:04,320
Speaker 3: is a fake concept drawn up by religious, zealots but

442
00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:07,200
Speaker 3: the stuff you say shows it has really scared your

443
00:20:07,359 --> 00:20:10,119
Speaker 3: view on. Women, also you know Those lifetime movies your

444
00:20:10,119 --> 00:20:12,400
Speaker 3: mom drags me into watching with her just about every.

445
00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:14,679
Speaker 3: Time the plot is about an armful partner where the

446
00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:17,240
Speaker 3: man says he won't DO x because it's a precursor to.

447
00:20:17,400 --> 00:20:20,280
Speaker 3: Mistreatment it's a front where he does all the right

448
00:20:20,320 --> 00:20:22,679
Speaker 3: things so she doesn't see it. Coming, okay so did

449
00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:25,400
Speaker 3: the matchmaker just like call his dad back and, say,

450
00:20:25,480 --> 00:20:28,040
Speaker 3: okay THIS i have to. Dish, now this is what

451
00:20:28,119 --> 00:20:28,520
Speaker 3: your son.

452
00:20:28,600 --> 00:20:31,200
Speaker 2: Said this is a whole bunch of. Crazy oh my, gosh,

453
00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:32,840
Speaker 2: said dad is freaking me. Out and you know WHEN

454
00:20:32,840 --> 00:20:35,280
Speaker 2: i watch movies or just stories like gets sucked. In

455
00:20:35,320 --> 00:20:36,640
Speaker 2: i'm in there living room right now and.

456
00:20:36,600 --> 00:20:39,000
Speaker 3: Just, yeah you're watching and it is so so.

457
00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:41,320
Speaker 2: Bizarre but, YEAH i can't believe he's still living at,

458
00:20:41,320 --> 00:20:43,720
Speaker 2: HOME i mean getting an, apartment because.

459
00:20:43,480 --> 00:20:45,920
Speaker 3: That's some weird these parents. ARE i, mean at least

460
00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:46,480
Speaker 3: the dad is.

461
00:20:46,560 --> 00:20:49,280
Speaker 2: Pretty you gotta, Wonder, yeah and you gotta, wonder but,

462
00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:51,360
Speaker 2: like do they watch porn? Together at this, Point i'm.

463
00:20:51,359 --> 00:20:54,960
Speaker 2: Curious thank you for explaining that you weren't talking about.

464
00:20:54,960 --> 00:21:00,360
Speaker 3: Me, okay my, QUESTION i guess real quick question is

465
00:21:00,359 --> 00:21:04,399
Speaker 3: is there like a privacy? Agreement? No, absolutely this feels

466
00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:06,000
Speaker 3: like it's breaking a privacy.

467
00:21:06,040 --> 00:21:09,440
Speaker 2: Agreement we like operate like a law firm and we get,

468
00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:14,240
Speaker 2: people you, know, disclosure no, disclosure and we're so, like,

469
00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:16,240
Speaker 2: okay so when we metch somebody up and if they're,

470
00:21:16,240 --> 00:21:18,240
Speaker 2: in LIKE i don't, know in a common occupation and

471
00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:21,320
Speaker 2: have a kind of a common. Name, yeah, well even

472
00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:23,960
Speaker 2: because it only took us one time to figure this,

473
00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:26,600
Speaker 2: out Like, internet you can find out who's who in a.

474
00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:29,000
Speaker 2: Heartbeat so we've got like a whole bunch of Like

475
00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:31,399
Speaker 2: sherlock homes working force to make sure nobody can google.

476
00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:34,480
Speaker 2: Anybody and that's. Cool, Yeah and because there's nothing worse

477
00:21:34,480 --> 00:21:35,280
Speaker 2: than sitting down at a.

478
00:21:35,280 --> 00:21:36,920
Speaker 3: Table or zoom and already.

479
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:39,120
Speaker 2: Knows, yeah they know more about you than you know. Yourself,

480
00:21:39,320 --> 00:21:40,960
Speaker 2: Yeah i'm not having it's gonna be.

481
00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:45,000
Speaker 3: Organic, oh he, Continues WTF i told them those things

482
00:21:45,040 --> 00:21:49,640
Speaker 3: as private father son conversations in, CONFIDENCE i asked, him

483
00:21:49,800 --> 00:21:51,800
Speaker 3: based on how she never brought it, UP i take

484
00:21:51,840 --> 00:21:53,960
Speaker 3: it you didn't mention now WHEN i got the WINDFALL

485
00:21:54,160 --> 00:21:57,639
Speaker 3: i donated in large scale to certain, charities or THAT

486
00:21:57,720 --> 00:22:00,119
Speaker 3: i donated to the local food, bank or WHEN i

487
00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:02,960
Speaker 3: saw a young mom at the supermarket check out underestimate

488
00:22:03,000 --> 00:22:05,120
Speaker 3: her grocery, BILL i gave her the amount she needed

489
00:22:05,119 --> 00:22:06,880
Speaker 3: and told her to keep the. Change none of that,

490
00:22:06,920 --> 00:22:09,800
Speaker 3: matters my dad, said, no it, doesn't because for the,

491
00:22:09,840 --> 00:22:12,280
Speaker 3: matchmaker it would be bad for business if she sets

492
00:22:12,280 --> 00:22:14,600
Speaker 3: you up with someone in six months later the woman

493
00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:20,360
Speaker 3: tells her you're controlling and possibly. Harmful. Yeah, yeah at

494
00:22:20,359 --> 00:22:22,920
Speaker 3: that POINT i had. IT i told my Parents i'm

495
00:22:22,920 --> 00:22:26,120
Speaker 3: gonna look for a short term. Rental, YEAH i think

496
00:22:26,119 --> 00:22:28,640
Speaker 3: that's the best way to. Go, well my new house

497
00:22:28,720 --> 00:22:31,680
Speaker 3: is being renovated BECAUSE i cannot stay with them, anymore

498
00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:35,840
Speaker 3: because apparently they would rather see their son alone than possibly.

499
00:22:35,920 --> 00:22:38,840
Speaker 3: Happy and since they know the address of my new.

500
00:22:38,840 --> 00:22:41,000
Speaker 3: HOUSE i let them know if they step foot on the,

501
00:22:41,080 --> 00:22:44,040
Speaker 3: Property i'll call the police and have them arrested for.

502
00:22:44,119 --> 00:22:45,879
Speaker 3: TRESPASSING ou so ended.

503
00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:48,200
Speaker 2: Poorly, yeah that's messed. Up LIKE i wonder what the

504
00:22:48,280 --> 00:22:50,480
Speaker 2: dad's intentions, were you, know did he want to stay

505
00:22:50,520 --> 00:22:52,679
Speaker 2: single so he could have a porn partner or SOMETHING i.

506
00:22:52,680 --> 00:22:54,840
Speaker 3: Don't or like wanted the money for.

507
00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:59,040
Speaker 2: Himself interesting twists. There, yeah this sounds Like canon camera or.

508
00:22:59,040 --> 00:23:01,760
Speaker 3: Something, yeah looked at my dad and, SAID i may

509
00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:04,080
Speaker 3: have just lost my. Son why did you have to

510
00:23:04,119 --> 00:23:06,840
Speaker 3: do any of? That my dad called her enabler and walked.

511
00:23:06,840 --> 00:23:09,200
Speaker 2: Away they need. Counseling, yeah they need their house.

512
00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:11,440
Speaker 3: Staged and we've got a little bit left to this.

513
00:23:11,520 --> 00:23:12,640
Speaker 3: Story but do you have any.

514
00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:16,840
Speaker 2: Final thoughts about that? Story? WOW i gotta, LIKE i don't,

515
00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:17,320
Speaker 2: know let it.

516
00:23:17,359 --> 00:23:20,320
Speaker 3: Go, yeah it is really.

517
00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:22,720
Speaker 2: DISTURBING i might be a. Creampuff i'm a cream puff

518
00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:25,440
Speaker 2: mach maker, Confession but that's just like a. Lot, yeah

519
00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:27,280
Speaker 2: he did the right. Thing i'm really. GLAD i feel

520
00:23:27,280 --> 00:23:30,360
Speaker 2: bad for the dad to, uh you, KNOW i could

521
00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:32,840
Speaker 2: just say one quick thing about. Men men have come

522
00:23:32,920 --> 00:23:35,760
Speaker 2: like into this like, evolution and there's like a super

523
00:23:35,760 --> 00:23:38,919
Speaker 2: big awkward phase of men coming out of playing the

524
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:42,119
Speaker 2: hardcore chest beat dad and, stuff and they had to

525
00:23:42,240 --> 00:23:44,840
Speaker 2: study At harvard like a few months, ago and it

526
00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:48,040
Speaker 2: said that men are more sensitive than women and they

527
00:23:48,160 --> 00:23:50,960
Speaker 2: just have never been able to learn how to express

528
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:53,919
Speaker 2: themselves and that can you, know that can mess you.

529
00:23:54,000 --> 00:23:56,280
Speaker 2: UP i don't know what the right you know as a.

530
00:23:56,320 --> 00:24:00,080
Speaker 3: Man, yeah so you TAKE i, think, yeah tends like

531
00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:02,080
Speaker 3: if you don't have an, outlet you tend to keep

532
00:24:02,119 --> 00:24:03,120
Speaker 3: everything in and then It.

533
00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:06,679
Speaker 1: Yeah actually it's the it's the, bravado the. Macho you,

534
00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:08,320
Speaker 1: know you can't show that you can cry or talk

535
00:24:08,359 --> 00:24:11,600
Speaker 1: about your feelings because so. People, YEAH i think people

536
00:24:11,640 --> 00:24:15,960
Speaker 1: think you're weaker or too. Sensitive but, yeah that was

537
00:24:16,000 --> 00:24:19,760
Speaker 1: the mindset for me growing. Up but obviously it's over

538
00:24:19,800 --> 00:24:23,639
Speaker 1: time it's changed and yeah it's getting more, progressive. Thankfully but,

539
00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:24,840
Speaker 1: yeah it's.

540
00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:27,440
Speaker 3: Doesn't seem like it's done in this household, Though, yeah.

541
00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:29,280
Speaker 2: Exactly. YEAH a friend of mine was telling me that

542
00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:31,520
Speaker 2: his dad was the word starts with the d the

543
00:24:31,520 --> 00:24:33,000
Speaker 2: other day and like all dads were.

544
00:24:33,160 --> 00:24:37,520
Speaker 3: That, yeah but op. Continues AFTER i found a place

545
00:24:37,560 --> 00:24:41,040
Speaker 3: and began, packing my phone and social media dms were

546
00:24:41,080 --> 00:24:43,880
Speaker 3: flooded with messages saying HOW i shouldn't be so harsh

547
00:24:43,920 --> 00:24:46,639
Speaker 3: on my parents because my, dad likely in a moment of,

548
00:24:46,680 --> 00:24:49,600
Speaker 3: anger called up the. Matchmaker turns out that a moment

549
00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:52,320
Speaker 3: of anger was based on what a family member told

550
00:24:52,320 --> 00:24:55,520
Speaker 3: me BECAUSE i paid off their mortgage and told them

551
00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:57,440
Speaker 3: they can stay in their current home and That i'm

552
00:24:57,480 --> 00:25:00,680
Speaker 3: planning to live in my new house by. Myself apparently

553
00:25:00,720 --> 00:25:03,440
Speaker 3: told this, person after all we've done for, him he's

554
00:25:03,440 --> 00:25:06,000
Speaker 3: gonna make us live in this small house with no

555
00:25:06,240 --> 00:25:08,840
Speaker 3: room for our cat to. Roam, well he moves into

556
00:25:08,880 --> 00:25:11,960
Speaker 3: a large house with actual property around it by, himself

557
00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:15,520
Speaker 3: simply because he thinks living by himself will improve its dating.

558
00:25:15,640 --> 00:25:21,080
Speaker 3: Chances might, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah that's kind of pretty.

559
00:25:21,080 --> 00:25:23,760
Speaker 3: Straightforward my dad apparently was pissed and, said if he

560
00:25:23,800 --> 00:25:26,119
Speaker 3: wants to live by himself at the expense of, us

561
00:25:26,240 --> 00:25:29,080
Speaker 3: let him stay living by. Himself so, YEAH a bunch

562
00:25:29,119 --> 00:25:31,760
Speaker 3: of people who don't know that are Saying i'm the

563
00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:34,480
Speaker 3: a hole for shutting my parents out over what, Happened

564
00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:36,879
Speaker 3: but they don't know that one. Detail AM i? REALLY

565
00:25:37,800 --> 00:25:39,920
Speaker 3: i don't think. SO i, think you, know maybe you

566
00:25:40,000 --> 00:25:43,240
Speaker 3: have some you, know THINGS i disagree with in terms

567
00:25:43,240 --> 00:25:45,399
Speaker 3: of your dating. Preferences BUT i don't think you're the

568
00:25:45,440 --> 00:25:46,520
Speaker 3: a hole in this situation.

569
00:25:46,840 --> 00:25:50,359
Speaker 2: Page, yeah oh, YEAH i gotta say this three here

570
00:25:50,720 --> 00:25:52,840
Speaker 2: is like one of the biggest problems in society right.

571
00:25:52,880 --> 00:25:54,760
Speaker 2: Now like the latest thing is like three out of

572
00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:59,480
Speaker 2: four families are estranged and no fault, necessarily but it's

573
00:25:59,480 --> 00:26:02,040
Speaker 2: hard for the parents to let go of their kids

574
00:26:02,080 --> 00:26:05,000
Speaker 2: sometimes and want a guilt them out and oh my, gosh,

575
00:26:05,119 --> 00:26:06,639
Speaker 2: yeah it's absolutely. Awkward.

576
00:26:06,960 --> 00:26:09,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, no it just seems like money got in the.

577
00:26:09,320 --> 00:26:10,760
Speaker 3: Way that he got a bunch of, money and then

578
00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:13,520
Speaker 3: they thought it was, theirs which is.

579
00:26:13,520 --> 00:26:16,040
Speaker 2: Typicult what made him think that whose money was? It

580
00:26:16,040 --> 00:26:16,280
Speaker 2: it was?

581
00:26:16,320 --> 00:26:19,200
Speaker 3: His, NO i THINK i don't remember. How he didn't

582
00:26:19,200 --> 00:26:20,840
Speaker 3: say how he GOT i think it just sounds like

583
00:26:20,880 --> 00:26:24,240
Speaker 3: he fell into money AND i think they just kind

584
00:26:24,280 --> 00:26:27,400
Speaker 3: of assumed that he would give an, him which is.

585
00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:30,280
Speaker 1: Yeah i'm, sorry, Buddy, Yeah, leslie have you had that?

586
00:26:30,359 --> 00:26:35,600
Speaker 1: Before were a client's parents or maybe like interfered WITH

587
00:26:36,520 --> 00:26:38,240
Speaker 1: i guess talk about.

588
00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:41,359
Speaker 2: Interfered, WELL i have. Done we worked with a lot

589
00:26:41,400 --> 00:26:45,159
Speaker 2: of people From South, asia very family oriented and Like

590
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:47,280
Speaker 2: i've had to go through the chain of, command Like

591
00:26:47,280 --> 00:26:50,919
Speaker 2: i'll first meet with the, Uncle i'm not, kidding and

592
00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:53,679
Speaker 2: then the family would fly in and meet him like

593
00:26:54,040 --> 00:26:57,480
Speaker 2: downtown Here La marriott and meet everybody in the boardroom and,

594
00:26:57,520 --> 00:27:01,040
Speaker 2: discuss you, know just, everything and the person would be

595
00:27:01,080 --> 00:27:03,000
Speaker 2: there that they wanted us to work, with you, know

596
00:27:03,080 --> 00:27:07,760
Speaker 2: their daughter or niece or. Whatever and, yeah they are

597
00:27:08,040 --> 00:27:11,800
Speaker 2: very when when you're in that, CULTURE i mean we're.

598
00:27:11,800 --> 00:27:15,960
Speaker 2: Worldwide we're not Just, la we're national and international and

599
00:27:16,080 --> 00:27:19,119
Speaker 2: there's like all a bunch of different cultures defector. In but, uh,

600
00:27:19,359 --> 00:27:21,600
Speaker 2: yeah the families play a big, part and it's like,

601
00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:24,920
Speaker 2: notorious you're not just marrying, Whomever you're marrying the. Family

602
00:27:25,160 --> 00:27:28,800
Speaker 2: and so, yeah watch some movies From South. Asia they'll

603
00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:31,960
Speaker 2: show somebody diving overboard on a cruise ship or something

604
00:27:32,040 --> 00:27:34,639
Speaker 2: because they don't want to be on the with all

605
00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:35,280
Speaker 2: the families or.

606
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:36,199
Speaker 3: Something it's just.

607
00:27:36,240 --> 00:27:38,880
Speaker 1: Drama, yeah we, know we get some stories like, that

608
00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:40,920
Speaker 1: but nothing more that in times where they jump.

609
00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:46,639
Speaker 2: Off yeah, yeah cruise. SHIPS i have never gone on

610
00:27:46,680 --> 00:27:46,960
Speaker 2: a cruise.

611
00:27:46,960 --> 00:27:50,520
Speaker 3: SHIP i have ever been on a cruise ship. Either,

612
00:27:50,720 --> 00:27:53,840
Speaker 3: yeah but that's the end of that. Story but we

613
00:27:53,920 --> 00:27:57,919
Speaker 3: have some questions for, you so we'll get into. That

614
00:27:57,960 --> 00:28:00,760
Speaker 3: but before we actually, do do you want to reintroduce

615
00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:01,560
Speaker 3: yourself for any new.

616
00:28:01,600 --> 00:28:05,159
Speaker 2: People, SURE i Am Leslie. Am i'm the founder Of

617
00:28:05,160 --> 00:28:10,240
Speaker 2: Ambiance matchmaking and uh we're based mostly on the western

618
00:28:10,280 --> 00:28:13,840
Speaker 2: coast Of, california But New York city And, Miami, austin

619
00:28:13,960 --> 00:28:17,119
Speaker 2: we're pretty much all over and international now as.

620
00:28:17,119 --> 00:28:19,240
Speaker 3: Well thank, you and let's just get to help us

621
00:28:19,400 --> 00:28:24,720
Speaker 3: answer some, questions read some, stories but we, uh let's

622
00:28:24,720 --> 00:28:27,520
Speaker 3: get into this first, question what individual have you had

623
00:28:27,560 --> 00:28:30,600
Speaker 3: as a client who thought would be impossible to? Match,

624
00:28:30,800 --> 00:28:33,119
Speaker 3: SO i mean you don't have to be, Specific, no,

625
00:28:33,240 --> 00:28:35,960
Speaker 3: yeah you have any like, yeah.

626
00:28:36,520 --> 00:28:40,960
Speaker 2: Okay LIKE i normally wouldn't like these, DAYS i wouldn't take. Them, yeah,

627
00:28:40,960 --> 00:28:44,560
Speaker 2: okay because my, TIME i like my. Life. Yeah impossible

628
00:28:44,720 --> 00:28:47,400
Speaker 2: is a horrible word in. Matchmaking so BUT i did

629
00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:49,240
Speaker 2: take this one guy and the. World you, know the

630
00:28:49,320 --> 00:28:52,000
Speaker 2: universe is a funny place when it comes to things

631
00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:54,320
Speaker 2: that you think are kind of within your. Control but

632
00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:57,480
Speaker 2: this one guy came into. Office this was our first,

633
00:28:57,520 --> 00:28:59,760
Speaker 2: office which was in The, midwest by the, way and

634
00:29:00,040 --> 00:29:01,719
Speaker 2: oh my, gosh she was so. Nervous he was so,

635
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:04,680
Speaker 2: shy and he would not take his jacket, off and

636
00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:07,479
Speaker 2: he's like sinking low and he's, sweating and it was

637
00:29:07,520 --> 00:29:09,800
Speaker 2: painful for him to answer any of the, questions you,

638
00:29:09,800 --> 00:29:13,000
Speaker 2: know AND i was, like, wow, okay and he didn't even,

639
00:29:13,160 --> 00:29:15,040
Speaker 2: like you, know he was like, okay, well you, know

640
00:29:15,200 --> 00:29:17,040
Speaker 2: like he just wanted to sign and get out of.

641
00:29:17,080 --> 00:29:18,800
Speaker 2: There And i'm, like oh my, gosh you, Know i'm

642
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:20,760
Speaker 2: gonna have to pray hard over this one or. SOMETHING

643
00:29:20,800 --> 00:29:24,240
Speaker 2: i didn't. Know but, honestly like two weeks, later a

644
00:29:24,280 --> 00:29:27,240
Speaker 2: girl came in in his age. Category i'll never, forget you.

645
00:29:27,240 --> 00:29:28,800
Speaker 2: Know she was like kind of you, know trying to

646
00:29:28,840 --> 00:29:31,320
Speaker 2: style and. STUFF i remember her having oh he had

647
00:29:31,320 --> 00:29:33,920
Speaker 2: a booger in his nose and she had lipstick on her.

648
00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:34,440
Speaker 2: Teeth i'm not.

649
00:29:34,520 --> 00:29:39,960
Speaker 1: Kidding and, uh they got.

650
00:29:39,960 --> 00:29:42,400
Speaker 2: Married they never told. Me, Wow LIKE i SOMETIMES i

651
00:29:42,480 --> 00:29:44,840
Speaker 2: DON'T i get. IT i never find. Out i'll go

652
00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:46,640
Speaker 2: into like a restaurant and the owner will come or,

653
00:29:46,680 --> 00:29:48,600
Speaker 2: hey let's see so and so is in here celebrating their,

654
00:29:48,600 --> 00:29:51,240
Speaker 2: anniversary And i'm, like they got. Married oh, yeah but,

655
00:29:51,320 --> 00:29:54,000
Speaker 2: yeah this couple they were. Wow maybe just too shy

656
00:29:54,120 --> 00:29:56,840
Speaker 2: to told, me but, yeah so, Yeah i'm just really

657
00:29:56,880 --> 00:29:59,000
Speaker 2: happy about. That but these, days if it's like just too,

658
00:29:59,080 --> 00:30:02,360
Speaker 2: random we're like so, busy and, uh that just would

659
00:30:02,440 --> 00:30:04,920
Speaker 2: take a lot of time unless we wanted to give

660
00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:07,360
Speaker 2: us like a zillion dollars in a week and put everything

661
00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:07,640
Speaker 2: else on.

662
00:30:07,680 --> 00:30:09,200
Speaker 3: Hold, yeah folks.

663
00:30:09,200 --> 00:30:13,400
Speaker 1: On but, yeah, YEAH i did see in the comments

664
00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:16,880
Speaker 1: lestly That Emma wilkins, Said Oh i've heard of your

665
00:30:16,920 --> 00:30:18,120
Speaker 1: company over here in THE.

666
00:30:18,240 --> 00:30:21,560
Speaker 2: Uk, Nice, well thank, You. Mamma give us a. Call

667
00:30:23,920 --> 00:30:26,080
Speaker 2: the next, question, yeah we are in THE. UK i

668
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:26,880
Speaker 2: have to think about where we.

669
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:32,760
Speaker 3: Are yeah, yeah next, question what's your favorite success?

670
00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:35,080
Speaker 1: Story hey, all It's john Og host. Here we're gonna

671
00:30:35,080 --> 00:30:36,479
Speaker 1: get back to the, story but here's a quick three

672
00:30:36,480 --> 00:30:37,440
Speaker 1: minute break from ask for more.

673
00:30:37,480 --> 00:30:40,640
Speaker 2: Sponsors, okay this is where my mind gets bund because

674
00:30:40,640 --> 00:30:41,160
Speaker 2: we have so.

675
00:30:42,600 --> 00:30:44,920
Speaker 3: Or one of THEM i suppose, Already.

676
00:30:45,560 --> 00:30:47,440
Speaker 1: Like what the one that comes to, mind or maybe

677
00:30:47,480 --> 00:30:48,280
Speaker 1: a couple that come to?

678
00:30:48,320 --> 00:30:51,440
Speaker 2: Mind, okay, fine well three come to. Mind i'll limited to. Two. One,

679
00:30:51,480 --> 00:30:53,360
Speaker 2: OKAY i really really like this one because it's in

680
00:30:53,360 --> 00:30:57,320
Speaker 2: Our chicago office and this, girl super cute, girl thirty

681
00:30:57,360 --> 00:30:59,760
Speaker 2: three maybe that's our target market, actually and she comes

682
00:30:59,800 --> 00:31:02,640
Speaker 2: in and we signed her. On she's a NEIGHBOR i

683
00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:04,520
Speaker 2: was living In Lincoln. Park she's like around the corner

684
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:09,080
Speaker 2: and then one of our staff members recruited somebody and

685
00:31:09,200 --> 00:31:11,840
Speaker 2: we ended up matching. THEM i think it was like

686
00:31:11,880 --> 00:31:14,880
Speaker 2: your second or third. Match long story, short they ended

687
00:31:14,960 --> 00:31:17,640
Speaker 2: up getting. Married, Okay so the reason is my favorite

688
00:31:17,680 --> 00:31:21,280
Speaker 2: story is because this is like matchmaking for you or

689
00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:24,000
Speaker 2: just fate OR i don't, know file it as you.

690
00:31:24,120 --> 00:31:26,880
Speaker 2: Wish but they got. Married they're living In scottsdale, now

691
00:31:26,960 --> 00:31:28,560
Speaker 2: much warmer way to, go and they have like three,

692
00:31:28,600 --> 00:31:30,920
Speaker 2: kids and they would have never maybe met she they

693
00:31:30,920 --> 00:31:33,080
Speaker 2: lived like a few blocks from each, other you, Know

694
00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:35,800
Speaker 2: and that to, ME i don't, know just stuff like,

695
00:31:35,800 --> 00:31:38,040
Speaker 2: that trusts me. Up i've actually sat in church and

696
00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:41,520
Speaker 2: like seeing one person and another person like on separate

697
00:31:41,560 --> 00:31:44,040
Speaker 2: sides of the, church AND i knew they were gonna

698
00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:46,080
Speaker 2: meet on That, monday and it's so. Bizarre they're like

699
00:31:46,320 --> 00:31:48,440
Speaker 2: in there and they had no clue about what's you,

700
00:31:48,480 --> 00:31:51,520
Speaker 2: know it's like a Weird hollywood show or. Something but

701
00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:54,800
Speaker 2: another one is, like, uh it's in one of our

702
00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:59,880
Speaker 2: cultures that, is you, know pretty staunch on cultural aka

703
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:03,920
Speaker 2: and religious. Beliefs AND i got this girl to think

704
00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:05,440
Speaker 2: out of the box and she came to Us i'll

705
00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:08,080
Speaker 2: never forget and she was like her energy vibe was

706
00:32:08,120 --> 00:32:10,720
Speaker 2: like really. DOWN i was, like, oh because sometimes that's

707
00:32:10,720 --> 00:32:13,080
Speaker 2: a tough spell to. BREAK i, WAS i don't, know

708
00:32:13,120 --> 00:32:15,360
Speaker 2: remember me Of eyre From winnie the Pood A. Hotel

709
00:32:15,920 --> 00:32:18,959
Speaker 2: but and and she had used some bad match makers

710
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:21,640
Speaker 2: in the. Past And i'm not saying we have a

711
00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:24,120
Speaker 2: perfect track. Record it's, like you know sometimes like, well

712
00:32:24,160 --> 00:32:25,880
Speaker 2: we'll get to that in a. Bit but, uh, yeah

713
00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:29,040
Speaker 2: she ended up really being open minded on that point of.

714
00:32:29,080 --> 00:32:31,680
Speaker 2: RELIGION i thought her parents were gonna kill, me but

715
00:32:31,720 --> 00:32:34,480
Speaker 2: they ended up getting married in. It she couldn't be happier.

716
00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:36,520
Speaker 2: Now and it's just so nice to see somebody come.

717
00:32:36,560 --> 00:32:39,200
Speaker 2: Alive and they invited me to their wedding and all

718
00:32:39,200 --> 00:32:42,800
Speaker 2: that kind of. Stuff that's. Lovely so that's? Two was that?

719
00:32:42,800 --> 00:32:43,120
Speaker 3: Two or?

720
00:32:43,160 --> 00:32:45,480
Speaker 2: One that was? Two was? That the? Okay one? More

721
00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:48,680
Speaker 2: this guy he like has this company and it's all

722
00:32:48,720 --> 00:32:52,520
Speaker 2: around the, world and he was limiting me on. Geography,

723
00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:55,880
Speaker 2: yeah AND i like sometimes like like ninety percent of the,

724
00:32:55,920 --> 00:32:59,360
Speaker 2: time like halfway through at, least and even sometimes were

725
00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:01,120
Speaker 2: they coming office Since i've been doing this so, long

726
00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:02,840
Speaker 2: But i'll get like an idea of WHO i think

727
00:33:02,880 --> 00:33:05,680
Speaker 2: they should, meet who their first date should, be And lord.

728
00:33:05,720 --> 00:33:08,200
Speaker 2: Forbid she'd be, like you, know outside of a few zip.

729
00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:10,560
Speaker 2: Codes AND i kept trying to and he was, like

730
00:33:10,640 --> 00:33:12,640
Speaker 2: had it going? On you? Know he was, like you,

731
00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:16,360
Speaker 2: know this town's most eligible bachelor. Who but he kept

732
00:33:16,360 --> 00:33:18,760
Speaker 2: saying no to this place because it was like a

733
00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:21,640
Speaker 2: half an hour out of his you, know dating jurisdiction or.

734
00:33:21,640 --> 00:33:23,560
Speaker 2: Something and he was having a good. Time he's meeting

735
00:33:23,600 --> 00:33:26,000
Speaker 2: a lot of amazing. Women he'd just come out of long.

736
00:33:26,040 --> 00:33:29,360
Speaker 2: MARRIAGE i need to factor that. In but his membership.

737
00:33:29,520 --> 00:33:32,320
Speaker 2: ENDED i was, like, okay well we did our. Best

738
00:33:32,440 --> 00:33:35,160
Speaker 2: and then he called us up maybe a month. Later

739
00:33:35,160 --> 00:33:37,720
Speaker 2: it was, like can you please renew my? Membership And

740
00:33:37,720 --> 00:33:40,640
Speaker 2: i'm like, okay but you have to meet this. Girl

741
00:33:40,680 --> 00:33:41,880
Speaker 2: and he's, like WELL i am going to be at

742
00:33:41,880 --> 00:33:44,640
Speaker 2: this certain basketball game down the. Road i'm, like, okay

743
00:33:44,640 --> 00:33:46,640
Speaker 2: you guys are. Meeting and they met and got. Married

744
00:33:46,760 --> 00:33:48,800
Speaker 2: so you're, LIKE i, know but let me do.

745
00:33:48,880 --> 00:33:49,600
Speaker 3: IT i thought it's so.

746
00:33:49,760 --> 00:33:51,920
Speaker 2: Cute i'm JUST i was so. Happy that would have

747
00:33:51,960 --> 00:33:55,000
Speaker 2: been one like probably on my. TOMBSTONE i would have written.

748
00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:58,280
Speaker 2: Something but he needed that time to, decompress you, know

749
00:33:58,400 --> 00:34:00,920
Speaker 2: out of coming out of a long. Marriage. Yeah so

750
00:34:01,080 --> 00:34:05,800
Speaker 2: timing like out of control so important and energy time and. Energy,

751
00:34:05,800 --> 00:34:08,080
Speaker 2: Wow NO i think you want To.

752
00:34:08,080 --> 00:34:13,120
Speaker 3: John i'm on. It i'm. Ready i've done pretty well at,

753
00:34:13,160 --> 00:34:15,799
Speaker 3: setting accidentally setting up all of my friends so.

754
00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:17,520
Speaker 2: Successfully.

755
00:34:17,600 --> 00:34:20,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah just, WELL i Just i'm not actually doing.

756
00:34:20,160 --> 00:34:25,200
Speaker 3: Anything i'm just bringing. Friends you really need to know. Set,

757
00:34:25,640 --> 00:34:27,719
Speaker 3: Yeah i'm just LIKE i throw parties And i'm, like

758
00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:28,160
Speaker 3: here you. Go.

759
00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:31,920
Speaker 2: Nice yeah that's, nice very. Nice, yeah where'd you get that?

760
00:34:32,040 --> 00:34:33,000
Speaker 2: From my?

761
00:34:33,160 --> 00:34:36,040
Speaker 3: Parents my parents love to host and uh now my

762
00:34:36,080 --> 00:34:37,400
Speaker 3: brother AND i both love to host as.

763
00:34:37,400 --> 00:34:39,920
Speaker 2: Well, yeah what about introducing.

764
00:34:39,920 --> 00:34:43,799
Speaker 3: People i've always been the type of person who likes

765
00:34:43,880 --> 00:34:45,440
Speaker 3: BECAUSE i feel LIKE i have a lot of friends

766
00:34:45,680 --> 00:34:48,120
Speaker 3: like to keep their friends, separate you, know like the friends.

767
00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:49,399
Speaker 2: Groups that's a weird. Thing.

768
00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:51,839
Speaker 3: Yeah, Yeah i'm like the Person i'm, LIKE i want

769
00:34:51,880 --> 00:34:54,080
Speaker 3: to bring all of my friends together BECAUSE i think

770
00:34:54,080 --> 00:34:56,560
Speaker 3: that you guys will like each. OTHER i like all of. You,

771
00:34:56,920 --> 00:34:59,759
Speaker 3: yeah and that usually ends up working, out that's.

772
00:34:59,800 --> 00:35:00,680
Speaker 2: All i'm, like totally get.

773
00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:01,040
Speaker 3: It we're all.

774
00:35:01,080 --> 00:35:03,920
Speaker 2: One but what are those people all about that don't

775
00:35:04,040 --> 00:35:05,320
Speaker 2: that want to keep everything? Separate?

776
00:35:05,520 --> 00:35:08,279
Speaker 3: YEAH i don't. KNOW i think people have like there

777
00:35:08,280 --> 00:35:11,040
Speaker 3: are certain people LIKE i have certain friends who just

778
00:35:11,120 --> 00:35:13,920
Speaker 3: have different groups for different parts of their lives and,

779
00:35:14,000 --> 00:35:15,719
Speaker 3: uh and those have to stay. Separate it's kind of

780
00:35:15,760 --> 00:35:16,279
Speaker 3: like you're peas and.

781
00:35:16,360 --> 00:35:19,480
Speaker 1: Carrots, okay, well, yeah they have like multiple, personas you,

782
00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:22,759
Speaker 1: know pers for. This, yeah this is like this is

783
00:35:22,800 --> 00:35:25,480
Speaker 1: my personality for this. GROUP i talk like this and

784
00:35:25,520 --> 00:35:27,000
Speaker 1: this is the. OTHER i can act like this with

785
00:35:27,080 --> 00:35:28,880
Speaker 1: this front. GROUP i know some people.

786
00:35:28,640 --> 00:35:29,440
Speaker 3: Like that wild.

787
00:35:29,760 --> 00:35:33,880
Speaker 2: Compartmentalize, yeah let's see some of.

788
00:35:33,920 --> 00:35:36,480
Speaker 3: You you've already answered some of these. Questions actually in those,

789
00:35:38,200 --> 00:35:41,040
Speaker 3: hmm let's. See what are the red flags that tell

790
00:35:41,080 --> 00:35:43,360
Speaker 3: you someone needs therapy before they're ready to be?

791
00:35:43,480 --> 00:35:49,680
Speaker 2: Matched, okay one would be crying in an. INTERVIEW m

792
00:35:50,239 --> 00:35:53,040
Speaker 2: had that. Happen it was like a top like we've

793
00:35:53,120 --> 00:35:55,640
Speaker 2: all heard of this. Company she's like vice president or. Something,

794
00:35:55,719 --> 00:35:57,479
Speaker 2: yeah and she was a young lidow AND i was super.

795
00:35:57,480 --> 00:36:00,640
Speaker 2: Sad ACTUALLY i don't start, crying so, yeah not ready.

796
00:36:01,120 --> 00:36:04,239
Speaker 3: Absolutely. Yeah if someone's like still very emotional about like

797
00:36:04,280 --> 00:36:05,120
Speaker 3: a previous really.

798
00:36:05,120 --> 00:36:08,800
Speaker 2: SUPs. Yeah there's gree, therapy you, know and some people

799
00:36:08,960 --> 00:36:11,760
Speaker 2: like will go through tears two years Of greek therapy

800
00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:14,840
Speaker 2: and still like that can Be Like i've worked with

801
00:36:14,920 --> 00:36:17,080
Speaker 2: a lot of, widows and there's like a bunch of different,

802
00:36:17,160 --> 00:36:19,799
Speaker 2: Kinds like Some i'm told like five years, later we'll

803
00:36:19,800 --> 00:36:21,520
Speaker 2: still have all the clothes in the closet or something like,

804
00:36:21,560 --> 00:36:24,600
Speaker 2: that and then other ones, like, uh they're ready to

805
00:36:24,640 --> 00:36:28,160
Speaker 2: get back on and find love, again and those those

806
00:36:28,200 --> 00:36:30,520
Speaker 2: are pretty. COOL i could elaborate on, that BUT i won't.

807
00:36:30,520 --> 00:36:34,560
Speaker 2: Borry but, okay what's the third one would? BE i

808
00:36:34,640 --> 00:36:36,080
Speaker 2: THINK i just mentioned. Three let's move.

809
00:36:36,120 --> 00:36:39,160
Speaker 3: On, yeah, Okay, uh what do entrepreneurs need in a

810
00:36:39,200 --> 00:36:40,719
Speaker 3: partner that they don't even realize they're?

811
00:36:40,760 --> 00:36:44,799
Speaker 2: Missing you, KNOW i would have to say someone to

812
00:36:44,960 --> 00:36:49,520
Speaker 2: perhaps soften, them, entrepreneurs and we can get maybe a

813
00:36:49,560 --> 00:36:54,760
Speaker 2: little edgy and maybe sometimes feel like you don't need somebody. Necessarily,

814
00:36:55,239 --> 00:36:59,480
Speaker 2: yeah you, know independence is a great. Thing because, YEAH

815
00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:01,200
Speaker 2: i was gonna go retro a little bit ago and

816
00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:03,960
Speaker 2: talk about like how women we're at such an awkward

817
00:37:03,960 --> 00:37:06,520
Speaker 2: phase evolutionary, wives because women are excelling so much and

818
00:37:06,560 --> 00:37:09,360
Speaker 2: they don't necessarily need a guy anymore for, things you,

819
00:37:09,400 --> 00:37:11,040
Speaker 2: know once upon a, time but, uh.

820
00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:13,600
Speaker 3: Yeah you don't need that like, security.

821
00:37:13,040 --> 00:37:15,000
Speaker 2: No, no, No but you know the new thing about,

822
00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:18,160
Speaker 2: THAT i don't know if anybody's Read Untethered. Soul it's

823
00:37:18,160 --> 00:37:20,319
Speaker 2: a pretty cool. Book i've actually well the second TIME

824
00:37:20,360 --> 00:37:25,760
Speaker 2: i burned through, it but talks about just how important

825
00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:30,960
Speaker 2: it is to undo a lot of our mindsets and

826
00:37:31,040 --> 00:37:33,239
Speaker 2: this and NOW i look at it like one step,

827
00:37:33,239 --> 00:37:36,279
Speaker 2: back two steps forward because, People, okay for the first

828
00:37:36,320 --> 00:37:39,840
Speaker 2: time in, history the majority of the population are. Single you,

829
00:37:39,880 --> 00:37:42,920
Speaker 2: know a few different reasons for, that BUT i believe

830
00:37:42,920 --> 00:37:45,640
Speaker 2: that we're evolving back around again and people are coming

831
00:37:45,680 --> 00:37:48,640
Speaker 2: together for the right, reasons and it's better to be

832
00:37:48,640 --> 00:37:50,920
Speaker 2: alone than in a bad. Relationship, absolutely.

833
00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:53,360
Speaker 3: YEAH i think like that's happening a lot In japan

834
00:37:53,400 --> 00:37:55,440
Speaker 3: specifically with like a lot of a lot OF i, think, right,

835
00:37:55,680 --> 00:37:57,920
Speaker 3: yeah a lot of women are saying, like, Well i'm.

836
00:37:57,760 --> 00:38:01,840
Speaker 1: Not Gonna japan's just yea rates relationships or marriage or

837
00:38:01,920 --> 00:38:04,759
Speaker 1: just birth rates are all going. Down just. YEAH i

838
00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:07,239
Speaker 1: think it's it's crazy to see BECAUSE i know from

839
00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:09,680
Speaker 1: like if you go back to just even like fifty years,

840
00:38:09,680 --> 00:38:13,880
Speaker 1: ago the numbers are so drastically, different, yeah to today's

841
00:38:14,120 --> 00:38:15,000
Speaker 1: like modern modern.

842
00:38:15,000 --> 00:38:17,960
Speaker 2: Times, yeah, yeah there's a lot of reasons for. That

843
00:38:18,040 --> 00:38:20,320
Speaker 2: who's the guy that sang that, Song, Oh Ted. NUGENT

844
00:38:21,239 --> 00:38:23,880
Speaker 2: i saw him on like some crazy news story this,

845
00:38:23,920 --> 00:38:28,040
Speaker 2: morning and, yeah he had some weird explanations about, that but, yeah, anyway.

846
00:38:28,200 --> 00:38:31,879
Speaker 3: Uh and then my last, question what got you into? Matchmaking?

847
00:38:32,160 --> 00:38:37,000
Speaker 2: Ooh interesting? Story well, okay making sure story is not my.

848
00:38:37,040 --> 00:38:39,880
Speaker 2: Forte BUT i didn't like go, OOH i want to

849
00:38:39,880 --> 00:38:43,080
Speaker 2: become a. Matchmaker, yeah BUT i was sitting Around, okay

850
00:38:43,200 --> 00:38:46,040
Speaker 2: two weeks before this event, HAPPENED i had been journaling

851
00:38:46,120 --> 00:38:48,839
Speaker 2: by the, fireplace AND i was really really, sad AND

852
00:38:48,920 --> 00:38:51,960
Speaker 2: i was actually crying and a tear will cry one

853
00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:55,879
Speaker 2: tier what's that called crying cry one? Tier? Whatever IF

854
00:38:55,920 --> 00:38:59,120
Speaker 2: i remember it falling on my yead stories sounded like woo.

855
00:38:59,200 --> 00:39:01,680
Speaker 2: Woo but it ended on my journal AND i circled

856
00:39:01,719 --> 00:39:03,400
Speaker 2: it AND i drew an error towards, it AND i

857
00:39:03,440 --> 00:39:05,640
Speaker 2: put WHY i was super sad BECAUSE i had never

858
00:39:05,680 --> 00:39:08,280
Speaker 2: really been, alone you, know BECAUSE i was like always

859
00:39:08,360 --> 00:39:10,279
Speaker 2: with some LIKE i was married for a long. Time

860
00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:12,480
Speaker 2: and and like two weeks, later and flipping through a

861
00:39:12,520 --> 00:39:16,320
Speaker 2: magazine AND i see this article and it was super blinged,

862
00:39:16,360 --> 00:39:18,960
Speaker 2: out WHICH i don't have a problem. With AND i

863
00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:21,120
Speaker 2: had no clue what they were talking. About ALL i

864
00:39:21,200 --> 00:39:22,400
Speaker 2: knew WAS i want to call him. Up AND i

865
00:39:22,400 --> 00:39:24,520
Speaker 2: called him, up and this girl answers the, Phone, Hi.

866
00:39:24,640 --> 00:39:28,359
Speaker 2: Megan uh she we're still friends and she's, like coming

867
00:39:28,400 --> 00:39:31,800
Speaker 2: down talk to. Us SO i. Did and her personality and,

868
00:39:31,880 --> 00:39:33,919
Speaker 2: mine you, know it was just like it was fun

869
00:39:33,960 --> 00:39:36,080
Speaker 2: because she must be eighty d two or. Something BUT

870
00:39:37,120 --> 00:39:39,680
Speaker 2: i did not know they were hiring. PEOPLE i did not.

871
00:39:39,840 --> 00:39:42,960
Speaker 2: Know next, day the owner calls me. Up she's, like,

872
00:39:43,239 --> 00:39:45,799
Speaker 2: WELL i can't remember her, words but they hired me

873
00:39:45,840 --> 00:39:48,560
Speaker 2: out of like three hundred people or. Something, wow oh,

874
00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:52,759
Speaker 2: wow okay gets. Weirder AND i needed a job they.

875
00:39:52,760 --> 00:39:54,839
Speaker 2: DID i, DON'T i, DON'T i don't. THINK i don't,

876
00:39:54,880 --> 00:39:56,600
Speaker 2: KNOW i don't. Think SO i don't remember what we talked.

877
00:39:56,600 --> 00:39:58,560
Speaker 2: About it a long time, ago but uh So i'm like.

878
00:39:58,640 --> 00:40:00,920
Speaker 2: Okay and then like a year LATER i hit the

879
00:40:00,920 --> 00:40:02,800
Speaker 2: ground run and a year later go in her office

880
00:40:02,800 --> 00:40:05,160
Speaker 2: And i'm, like, hey why did you hire? Me BECAUSE

881
00:40:05,160 --> 00:40:07,880
Speaker 2: i didn't know anything about, this you, know being single

882
00:40:08,320 --> 00:40:10,239
Speaker 2: much less all, this and she's like a little well

883
00:40:10,280 --> 00:40:12,359
Speaker 2: and she reaches into a drawer and she pulls out

884
00:40:12,480 --> 00:40:15,319
Speaker 2: all this stuff she THOUGHT i had sent, her and

885
00:40:15,360 --> 00:40:17,920
Speaker 2: she got me mixed up with. Something, No i'm not.

886
00:40:18,000 --> 00:40:20,600
Speaker 3: Kidding oh my, goodness That's you're, like that's not. Me,

887
00:40:20,760 --> 00:40:23,239
Speaker 3: no that's so.

888
00:40:23,440 --> 00:40:25,960
Speaker 2: Funny, yeah just like SO i think it was meant to.

889
00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:28,720
Speaker 3: Be she's, like, WELL i just love your your past

890
00:40:28,800 --> 00:40:30,040
Speaker 3: work in The Peace cort And.

891
00:40:30,000 --> 00:40:32,680
Speaker 2: You're, Like she's, like you wouldn't give, up you can.

892
00:40:32,719 --> 00:40:36,479
Speaker 2: CALL i was, like, yeah, yeah it was totally mixed.

893
00:40:36,560 --> 00:40:38,680
Speaker 3: Up, wow well it worked out.

894
00:40:39,719 --> 00:40:43,680
Speaker 2: THAT i just never stopped that like kind of a

895
00:40:43,680 --> 00:40:47,680
Speaker 2: red carpet of. Wonderfulness you, know we like just randomly

896
00:40:47,680 --> 00:40:50,040
Speaker 2: got written up In New York times and when we

897
00:40:50,080 --> 00:40:52,680
Speaker 2: first opened our, OFFICE i think within two weeks being In,

898
00:40:52,760 --> 00:40:55,759
Speaker 2: chicago we got written up in The Chicago. Tribune and

899
00:40:55,800 --> 00:40:58,600
Speaker 2: that just doesn't, happen you, know super. LUCKY i remember

900
00:40:58,800 --> 00:41:00,520
Speaker 2: actually she e mailed me the DAY i email or,

901
00:41:00,560 --> 00:41:02,200
Speaker 2: Back SORRY i have any emailed you, back but she

902
00:41:03,080 --> 00:41:05,200
Speaker 2: like INSISTED i have lunch with, her like right for.

903
00:41:05,239 --> 00:41:06,680
Speaker 2: That she's, like how did you get that she'd been

904
00:41:06,719 --> 00:41:09,480
Speaker 2: a matchmaker In chicago for like a decade or. SOMETHING

905
00:41:09,920 --> 00:41:11,520
Speaker 2: i was, LIKE i don't, KNOW i don't. Know she's

906
00:41:11,520 --> 00:41:13,719
Speaker 2: just like, amazing just worked, out.

907
00:41:13,800 --> 00:41:17,879
Speaker 3: Lucky, yeah did you have any other questions ken get

908
00:41:17,920 --> 00:41:19,399
Speaker 3: into the next story, otherwise.

909
00:41:19,560 --> 00:41:23,600
Speaker 1: Not necessarily obviously WHEN i talked about briefly, earlier was

910
00:41:23,680 --> 00:41:27,800
Speaker 1: the in cinematography or films when it comes to matchmakers

911
00:41:27,840 --> 00:41:33,759
Speaker 1: like hitch or or the material. List how you know does?

912
00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:34,960
Speaker 1: It do you think it's a good on the?

913
00:41:35,000 --> 00:41:35,239
Speaker 3: Roof?

914
00:41:35,400 --> 00:41:35,720
Speaker 2: Yeah?

915
00:41:35,880 --> 00:41:38,880
Speaker 1: Yeah do you think those all like good representations for you,

916
00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:41,520
Speaker 1: know your line of? Business or is it like a

917
00:41:41,560 --> 00:41:43,520
Speaker 1: little bit here and there or you know what do

918
00:41:43,560 --> 00:41:46,719
Speaker 1: you what do you think about how it's portrayed in uh?

919
00:41:47,280 --> 00:41:51,440
Speaker 2: Entertainment, NO i love that, Well fiddler on The. Roof

920
00:41:52,480 --> 00:41:54,359
Speaker 2: I'm jewish on my mom's. Side but, YEAH i don't

921
00:41:54,360 --> 00:41:55,960
Speaker 2: REMEMBER i saw that like in seventh. Grade my aunt

922
00:41:55,960 --> 00:41:59,319
Speaker 2: took me to love. IT i, know right it. Will

923
00:41:59,520 --> 00:42:01,880
Speaker 2: WHAT i like about it is like the yent to

924
00:42:02,040 --> 00:42:04,919
Speaker 2: aspect of. IT i, mean Like i'm supposed to mind

925
00:42:04,920 --> 00:42:06,880
Speaker 2: my own. BUSINESS i don't think, so you, know Like

926
00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:10,359
Speaker 2: i'm not going to start minding my own business and

927
00:42:10,520 --> 00:42:12,560
Speaker 2: because it is my. Business you, KNOW i had somebody

928
00:42:12,600 --> 00:42:13,959
Speaker 2: one time at the end of the. Interview he starts

929
00:42:13,960 --> 00:42:15,839
Speaker 2: trying to ask me If i'm like single or, something

930
00:42:15,880 --> 00:42:17,520
Speaker 2: And i'm, like, Oh i'm, SORRY i can't talk About he's,

931
00:42:17,520 --> 00:42:18,920
Speaker 2: like you just spend an, hour And i's like well

932
00:42:18,920 --> 00:42:19,200
Speaker 2: that's my.

933
00:42:19,239 --> 00:42:20,799
Speaker 3: Business, yeah, yeah you bade me. Do.

934
00:42:21,040 --> 00:42:25,160
Speaker 2: Yeah so the what's the other? One the? Other like other.

935
00:42:25,000 --> 00:42:26,240
Speaker 1: Matchment that Just hitch.

936
00:42:26,360 --> 00:42:31,440
Speaker 2: Materials, okay they should have had me as a consultant.

937
00:42:31,160 --> 00:42:32,440
Speaker 3: On that or maybe just any.

938
00:42:32,520 --> 00:42:35,400
Speaker 2: Match, Yeah LIKE i, MEAN I I i have to

939
00:42:35,440 --> 00:42:38,600
Speaker 2: CONFESS i haven't seen. IT i did see the. TRAILER

940
00:42:38,640 --> 00:42:40,160
Speaker 2: i thought about going and seeing, it and Then i'd

941
00:42:40,200 --> 00:42:43,520
Speaker 2: start hearing too many people say things About. Night from

942
00:42:43,520 --> 00:42:45,480
Speaker 2: WHAT i did, see it wasn't like a total, fail

943
00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:51,719
Speaker 2: but it just just and Then hitch, yes two thumbs up,

944
00:42:51,960 --> 00:42:54,680
Speaker 2: Whatever like it's so. Awesome, honestly IF i could like

945
00:42:54,719 --> 00:42:57,279
Speaker 2: shift gears AND i kind OF i go back and

946
00:42:57,320 --> 00:42:59,719
Speaker 2: forth on, this like it's nice having one client that

947
00:42:59,719 --> 00:43:02,520
Speaker 2: you can concentrate. On AND i love the bottom line

948
00:43:02,520 --> 00:43:04,600
Speaker 2: of that whole. Story everything was, awesome you, know just

949
00:43:04,640 --> 00:43:07,759
Speaker 2: how that guy was insecure and she didn't, care you,

950
00:43:07,800 --> 00:43:11,000
Speaker 2: know and JUST i love that when people get outside

951
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:13,680
Speaker 2: of their heads and you, know move forward with their,

952
00:43:13,680 --> 00:43:18,799
Speaker 2: hearts And pitch helped. Him he wouldn't efff guy was a.

953
00:43:18,840 --> 00:43:22,399
Speaker 3: MASS i need to watch this. MOVIE i know.

954
00:43:24,239 --> 00:43:27,600
Speaker 2: It's hilarious To Will Smith will at his.

955
00:43:27,640 --> 00:43:29,880
Speaker 3: Best, Yeah i'll give it a, Watch.

956
00:43:29,719 --> 00:43:30,120
Speaker 2: I'll watch it.

957
00:43:30,160 --> 00:43:32,799
Speaker 3: Again but we've got another story we're gonna get.

958
00:43:32,800 --> 00:43:34,720
Speaker 2: Into is it as dished?

959
00:43:34,760 --> 00:43:35,640
Speaker 3: OUT i don't.

960
00:43:35,680 --> 00:43:36,600
Speaker 1: KNOW i don't.

961
00:43:36,640 --> 00:43:39,040
Speaker 3: Know, yeah but it's gonna be the same. Thing i'm

962
00:43:39,040 --> 00:43:40,399
Speaker 3: gonna read the title and then you'll give.

963
00:43:40,280 --> 00:43:42,080
Speaker 2: A little QUICK i kind of quit looking at.

964
00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:46,239
Speaker 1: This, yeah, right, cool getting that set up right now for.

965
00:43:46,280 --> 00:43:49,399
Speaker 1: You i'm trying to think has probably, Not but does

966
00:43:49,400 --> 00:43:52,680
Speaker 1: anyone tried to match make you leslie and you, know

967
00:43:52,760 --> 00:43:54,480
Speaker 1: try to, like you, know, yes it's your line of.

968
00:43:54,480 --> 00:43:56,359
Speaker 1: Business does that ever get annoying or like they try

969
00:43:56,400 --> 00:43:58,600
Speaker 1: to give you advice or you, know do, this do?

970
00:43:58,719 --> 00:44:00,800
Speaker 1: THAT i don't. Know you said you were married, before

971
00:44:00,880 --> 00:44:03,799
Speaker 1: but with with you, know your line of, work has

972
00:44:03,880 --> 00:44:07,280
Speaker 1: anyone tried to do that for you in a sense?

973
00:44:07,440 --> 00:44:10,400
Speaker 1: Once oh, boy okay you.

974
00:44:10,440 --> 00:44:14,200
Speaker 2: Kind of get where this is. Going, Yeah, well like,

975
00:44:14,280 --> 00:44:16,920
Speaker 2: okay here's the, Thing, like, UH i, mean, okay this

976
00:44:16,960 --> 00:44:18,520
Speaker 2: is WHAT i tell my, clients and they're, like, well

977
00:44:18,520 --> 00:44:21,080
Speaker 2: my friends try to match me, up and you, Know i'm, like, okay,

978
00:44:21,120 --> 00:44:25,000
Speaker 2: well friends mean, well but they just don't understand all

979
00:44:25,000 --> 00:44:27,040
Speaker 2: the nuances and everything that kind of go into. It

980
00:44:27,160 --> 00:44:30,200
Speaker 2: And i'll be, honest like on, paper this person seemed

981
00:44:30,239 --> 00:44:33,480
Speaker 2: okay or from what everything she told, Me but oh

982
00:44:33,520 --> 00:44:36,479
Speaker 2: it was a brutal forty five. Minutes, yeah, yeah.

983
00:44:36,800 --> 00:44:39,719
Speaker 3: Yikes, yeah they don't Always they don't always know what

984
00:44:40,280 --> 00:44:40,680
Speaker 3: you like.

985
00:44:41,280 --> 00:44:45,120
Speaker 2: Specifically, yeah she was in fashion and she should stay

986
00:44:45,120 --> 00:44:46,480
Speaker 2: in fashion Real, yeah.

987
00:44:46,680 --> 00:44:50,160
Speaker 3: Yeah makes. Sense all, Right but we're you getting to

988
00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:50,520
Speaker 3: this next.

989
00:44:50,560 --> 00:44:52,399
Speaker 1: Story oh, boy He's john og.

990
00:44:52,520 --> 00:44:54,040
Speaker 3: Host we're gonna get back to the, stories but a

991
00:44:54,120 --> 00:44:56,480
Speaker 3: quick free minute break of ads from our. Sponsors my

992
00:44:56,680 --> 00:44:59,719
Speaker 3: matchmaker kept telling me about all the people who were

993
00:45:00,000 --> 00:45:00,480
Speaker 3: acted my.

994
00:45:00,560 --> 00:45:04,879
Speaker 2: Profile ou ouch, Again, ouch that's a BRUTAL i don't

995
00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:08,600
Speaker 2: Think i've ever done that, unlessly press and press hard

996
00:45:08,800 --> 00:45:10,879
Speaker 2: BECAUSE i don't like curtin. Feelings, yeah isn't.

997
00:45:10,880 --> 00:45:12,600
Speaker 1: That isn't that like also a kind of like a

998
00:45:12,719 --> 00:45:15,720
Speaker 1: legal innocence or is that like a league a legal?

999
00:45:15,760 --> 00:45:16,160
Speaker 1: THING i don't.

1000
00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:19,040
Speaker 2: Know interesting. Point maybe that's why we don't do.

1001
00:45:19,080 --> 00:45:23,719
Speaker 3: It ophie, says it has been hard to date most

1002
00:45:23,719 --> 00:45:25,960
Speaker 3: of my. LIFE i am. DISABLED i am open to

1003
00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:29,520
Speaker 3: dating able bodied and disabled folks. Both there are inherently

1004
00:45:29,600 --> 00:45:31,520
Speaker 3: less folks for me to date than most of other.

1005
00:45:31,560 --> 00:45:33,560
Speaker 3: PEOPLE i know that. Already so WHEN i got a

1006
00:45:33,560 --> 00:45:37,040
Speaker 3: surprise influx of some. Cash everyone's getting surprised with calls

1007
00:45:37,040 --> 00:45:40,160
Speaker 3: in these. Stories, YEAH i did something nice for. MYSELF

1008
00:45:40,280 --> 00:45:42,719
Speaker 3: i hired a. Matchmaker by the, way this comes from

1009
00:45:42,760 --> 00:45:44,520
Speaker 3: why AM i? Writing and if you want to submit

1010
00:45:44,560 --> 00:45:46,560
Speaker 3: your own, stories go to the r Slash okay story

1011
00:45:46,600 --> 00:45:47,120
Speaker 3: time separate.

1012
00:45:47,200 --> 00:45:50,680
Speaker 1: It I'm, Sophia I'm, leslie And I'm keon and we

1013
00:45:50,760 --> 00:45:52,279
Speaker 1: do have a special guest. Here if you want to

1014
00:45:52,280 --> 00:45:55,200
Speaker 1: go ahead and introduce, Yourself, leslie please let everyone know

1015
00:45:55,280 --> 00:45:55,560
Speaker 1: who you.

1016
00:45:55,600 --> 00:45:59,080
Speaker 2: Are, Well I'm leslie in my own Ill, beyonce patchy

1017
00:45:59,120 --> 00:45:59,840
Speaker 2: making and nice TO.

1018
00:46:00,600 --> 00:46:03,239
Speaker 3: U leslie's gonna help read these. STORIES i love, this

1019
00:46:03,560 --> 00:46:07,000
Speaker 3: And opie. Says this matchmaker cost a pretty penny like

1020
00:46:07,120 --> 00:46:09,960
Speaker 3: half year's worth of my. Rent before taking my, MONEY

1021
00:46:10,000 --> 00:46:11,960
Speaker 3: i acknowledged THAT i knew it would be a bit

1022
00:46:12,040 --> 00:46:14,719
Speaker 3: more difficult to match, me and they promised they could

1023
00:46:14,760 --> 00:46:17,319
Speaker 3: find me some, dates SO i, thought why. Not i'm

1024
00:46:17,360 --> 00:46:20,319
Speaker 3: not doing great at it. Myself in the, contract they

1025
00:46:20,360 --> 00:46:24,399
Speaker 3: guaranteed five to seven dates within six. Months the thing,

1026
00:46:24,520 --> 00:46:28,680
Speaker 3: is this, matchmaker, unprompted keeps mentioning how many times my

1027
00:46:28,880 --> 00:46:33,680
Speaker 3: profile gets rejected by? People why that's not Helping opie's

1028
00:46:33,719 --> 00:46:37,120
Speaker 3: confidence last. Week they even mentioned the name of one

1029
00:46:37,160 --> 00:46:39,920
Speaker 3: of these people along with this. City the person lips.

1030
00:46:39,960 --> 00:46:46,279
Speaker 2: It, yeah that's question That, yeah absolutely none of these

1031
00:46:46,280 --> 00:46:46,680
Speaker 2: people are.

1032
00:46:46,680 --> 00:46:48,920
Speaker 3: Folks the matchmaker is introduced to me AND i have

1033
00:46:49,040 --> 00:46:51,080
Speaker 3: asked if it was something about the WAY i wrote

1034
00:46:51,080 --> 00:46:53,880
Speaker 3: about myself or is SOMETHING i could phrase, differently and

1035
00:46:53,880 --> 00:46:56,640
Speaker 3: they kept, saying, no it's not ANYTHING i can. Change

1036
00:46:56,960 --> 00:46:59,560
Speaker 3: they have yet to find me a single date or

1037
00:46:59,600 --> 00:47:02,360
Speaker 3: even show me a profile of anyone in five. Months

1038
00:47:02,600 --> 00:47:05,959
Speaker 3: and them constantly mentioning all the rejections THAT i didn't

1039
00:47:06,000 --> 00:47:08,719
Speaker 3: ask for is making me feel way worse about the

1040
00:47:08,760 --> 00:47:12,120
Speaker 3: possibility of. Dating it honestly has felt humiliating AND i

1041
00:47:12,160 --> 00:47:14,800
Speaker 3: can't BELIEVE i paid for. This in a recent, meeting

1042
00:47:14,840 --> 00:47:17,239
Speaker 3: they asked to extend the time for my contract by

1043
00:47:17,280 --> 00:47:20,600
Speaker 3: three months at no extra. Cost AM i overreacting for

1044
00:47:20,840 --> 00:47:24,800
Speaker 3: just wanting a full? Refund and we've got some? Comments

1045
00:47:24,840 --> 00:47:26,239
Speaker 3: but do you have any comments of your? Own?

1046
00:47:26,800 --> 00:47:31,040
Speaker 2: YEAH i, mean, okay first and, foremost there's so many

1047
00:47:31,040 --> 00:47:33,040
Speaker 2: match makers out. There i'll like see them pop up

1048
00:47:33,080 --> 00:47:34,880
Speaker 2: online and all a sudden they're, like, oh we have

1049
00:47:34,880 --> 00:47:38,000
Speaker 2: one hundred percent success. Rate, YEAH i mean it's Such,

1050
00:47:39,000 --> 00:47:42,840
Speaker 2: yeah and you so have to be so, careful just

1051
00:47:43,000 --> 00:47:47,360
Speaker 2: run through you, know your fact, checker and go with

1052
00:47:47,440 --> 00:47:51,799
Speaker 2: your gut. Feeling and for this case in, particular there

1053
00:47:51,960 --> 00:47:55,880
Speaker 2: is one matchmaker that specializes in you, know maybe you

1054
00:47:55,920 --> 00:47:58,839
Speaker 2: know handicaps or minor handicap or you, know whatever it might,

1055
00:47:58,880 --> 00:48:01,319
Speaker 2: be and that kind of help up the. ODDS i

1056
00:48:01,400 --> 00:48:04,959
Speaker 2: once took somebody that had be on a, crutch AND

1057
00:48:05,719 --> 00:48:07,560
Speaker 2: i wouldn't have taken them IF i didn't THINK i

1058
00:48:07,560 --> 00:48:10,520
Speaker 2: could match. Him was it? Easy? No but you KNOW i.

1059
00:48:10,520 --> 00:48:12,839
Speaker 2: DID i match him, up and he learned a lot

1060
00:48:13,040 --> 00:48:15,239
Speaker 2: and it was you, know an experience probably he's never.

1061
00:48:15,280 --> 00:48:18,000
Speaker 2: Had DID i get him? Married, no BUT i thought

1062
00:48:18,040 --> 00:48:20,000
Speaker 2: somebody comes and this was like a few years, ago

1063
00:48:20,040 --> 00:48:22,440
Speaker 2: BUT i still think about him like all the. Time

1064
00:48:22,520 --> 00:48:25,480
Speaker 2: and somebody came across THAT i thought would be good,

1065
00:48:25,480 --> 00:48:26,719
Speaker 2: MATCH i would totally pull him.

1066
00:48:26,840 --> 00:48:30,319
Speaker 3: Up and, yeah so like even so this is this

1067
00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:32,200
Speaker 3: no longer a client, Anymore but.

1068
00:48:32,400 --> 00:48:35,520
Speaker 2: No, we like most matchmakers can't really reinvent the. Wheel

1069
00:48:35,520 --> 00:48:38,359
Speaker 2: but we'll do like six and twelve month memberships and,

1070
00:48:38,600 --> 00:48:41,040
Speaker 2: uh you, know if they, expire it's kind of. Weird

1071
00:48:41,120 --> 00:48:43,040
Speaker 2: like the GUY i mentioned a little bit, ago you,

1072
00:48:43,080 --> 00:48:45,799
Speaker 2: know one hundred percent of people if they have not

1073
00:48:45,960 --> 00:48:50,000
Speaker 2: found love in their twelve, months and if they resign

1074
00:48:50,160 --> 00:48:53,319
Speaker 2: up they always get. Married yeah, WHY i don't even.

1075
00:48:53,320 --> 00:48:56,840
Speaker 2: Know and you're, like, yeah this that's, crazy it's. CRAZY

1076
00:48:56,880 --> 00:48:59,560
Speaker 2: i guess maybe they just had to like go you through.

1077
00:48:59,400 --> 00:49:01,759
Speaker 3: The rings first and then they're, like, Okay i'm ready.

1078
00:49:01,800 --> 00:49:06,319
Speaker 2: Now. Yeah, yeah, no it's, common one.

1079
00:49:06,400 --> 00:49:09,200
Speaker 3: Says not of, reacting just get a full. Refund, yeah

1080
00:49:09,239 --> 00:49:10,960
Speaker 3: it's like they're trying to show you the work they

1081
00:49:11,000 --> 00:49:13,840
Speaker 3: are doing by SAYING x person rejected. You they can't

1082
00:49:13,840 --> 00:49:16,640
Speaker 3: make people materialize out of her, pool but she should

1083
00:49:16,640 --> 00:49:20,040
Speaker 3: have a question in their questionnaire about willingness to date

1084
00:49:20,080 --> 00:49:23,040
Speaker 3: a person that is disabled and to handle that delicately

1085
00:49:23,080 --> 00:49:25,440
Speaker 3: if she accepted you as a. Client to, me they

1086
00:49:25,480 --> 00:49:29,839
Speaker 3: are being extremely unprofessional and WHILE i realize this may

1087
00:49:29,840 --> 00:49:32,319
Speaker 3: be stressful and new to, them you are paying them

1088
00:49:32,360 --> 00:49:35,200
Speaker 3: to handle those big, emotions not dump them on. You

1089
00:49:35,440 --> 00:49:38,560
Speaker 3: AND op, says, Yeah initially the matchmaker said it would

1090
00:49:38,560 --> 00:49:40,600
Speaker 3: take six to eight weeks to find me my first.

1091
00:49:40,640 --> 00:49:43,640
Speaker 3: Match when that time, passed they didn't even say anything

1092
00:49:43,640 --> 00:49:46,480
Speaker 3: to me about the. Lapse they seem genuinely shocked THAT

1093
00:49:46,520 --> 00:49:48,799
Speaker 3: i was bothered that it has taken this long to

1094
00:49:48,840 --> 00:49:51,279
Speaker 3: come up with, nothing and keeps telling me how much

1095
00:49:51,280 --> 00:49:53,600
Speaker 3: of an ally they are to disabled. People it's been

1096
00:49:53,600 --> 00:49:56,120
Speaker 3: a wild, ride but they act so strangely about it

1097
00:49:56,160 --> 00:49:58,959
Speaker 3: THAT i keep questioning my own. Emotions Common, too SAYS

1098
00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:01,040
Speaker 3: i don't think you're over acting for wanting a full.

1099
00:50:01,080 --> 00:50:03,239
Speaker 3: Refund it's one thing for them to not find you,

1100
00:50:03,360 --> 00:50:05,960
Speaker 3: matches but rubbing salt in the wound by telling you

1101
00:50:06,040 --> 00:50:10,360
Speaker 3: about all your rejections is just bizarre and. Unprofessional opie, says.

1102
00:50:10,640 --> 00:50:13,480
Speaker 3: YEAH i keep hoping there's some reason my matchmaker keeps

1103
00:50:13,480 --> 00:50:15,880
Speaker 3: doing it THAT i just can't understand, yet but it

1104
00:50:15,920 --> 00:50:18,360
Speaker 3: honestly makes me not want a date at. All replies,

1105
00:50:18,400 --> 00:50:21,000
Speaker 3: says there is a. Reason it's because they have completely

1106
00:50:21,000 --> 00:50:23,440
Speaker 3: failed to deliver on what you paid, for and they

1107
00:50:23,440 --> 00:50:26,760
Speaker 3: are trying to cover themselves by implying it's your fault

1108
00:50:26,880 --> 00:50:29,239
Speaker 3: and not. Theirs they shouldn't be doing the. Job they

1109
00:50:29,239 --> 00:50:33,239
Speaker 3: are terrible at. It get your money, back And opie, says,

1110
00:50:33,280 --> 00:50:35,120
Speaker 3: YEAH i Think i'm gonna request a full refund and

1111
00:50:35,200 --> 00:50:38,400
Speaker 3: keep it. Moving the lack of professionalism and gas lighting

1112
00:50:38,440 --> 00:50:41,440
Speaker 3: has made me feel Like i'm on another. Planet, yeah

1113
00:50:41,480 --> 00:50:42,720
Speaker 3: and that's the end of the story.

1114
00:50:42,840 --> 00:50:45,719
Speaker 2: TOTALLY i mean most matchmakers they do put in that

1115
00:50:45,760 --> 00:50:49,160
Speaker 2: there's no REFUND i want to see. This everybody. Listen, yeah,

1116
00:50:49,320 --> 00:50:52,919
Speaker 2: well and it's sinars. Too under no circumstances are there any,

1117
00:50:53,000 --> 00:50:56,480
Speaker 2: refunds but the and that's, legal you, know and there

1118
00:50:56,520 --> 00:51:00,840
Speaker 2: are no recourses on that necessarily could fight. It maybe

1119
00:51:00,880 --> 00:51:03,760
Speaker 2: by saying nothing was. DELIVERED i think that. Would i'm,

1120
00:51:03,800 --> 00:51:07,719
Speaker 2: Sorry i'm not returning to but, yeah, NO i mean

1121
00:51:07,840 --> 00:51:11,719
Speaker 2: if somebody's not, happy a good matchmaker will like TAKE

1122
00:51:11,880 --> 00:51:15,959
Speaker 2: i Mean i've had some people like be like towards

1123
00:51:16,000 --> 00:51:18,680
Speaker 2: the end of their agreement and they'll, say, oh, NO

1124
00:51:18,800 --> 00:51:21,080
Speaker 2: i haven't found love or. SOMETHING i want all my

1125
00:51:21,120 --> 00:51:23,400
Speaker 2: money back and we've like invested like one hundred hours or.

1126
00:51:23,400 --> 00:51:26,239
Speaker 2: Something you, know we can't do, that but you, know

1127
00:51:26,320 --> 00:51:29,560
Speaker 2: there's always a way to have somebody feel, okay like

1128
00:51:29,600 --> 00:51:30,799
Speaker 2: they weren't taking advantage Of.

1129
00:51:31,000 --> 00:51:34,040
Speaker 3: YEAH i think this person just wants a Mat, YEAH i.

1130
00:51:34,160 --> 00:51:36,080
Speaker 2: Know And i'm just all these Stories i'm, here and

1131
00:51:36,120 --> 00:51:38,160
Speaker 2: it kind of it makes me really. WONDER i THINK

1132
00:51:38,200 --> 00:51:40,800
Speaker 2: i know pretty much all the matchmakers out, THERE d and.

1133
00:51:40,880 --> 00:51:43,480
Speaker 2: Safe it's a specialty in that. DEPARTMENT i hope it

1134
00:51:43,520 --> 00:51:45,600
Speaker 2: isn't because you'd like to think that they're doing a good.

1135
00:51:45,640 --> 00:51:49,000
Speaker 2: Job but matchmaker is not easy and people have no

1136
00:51:49,080 --> 00:51:52,040
Speaker 2: idea that we don't just siterund better, Eyelashes and it's

1137
00:51:52,080 --> 00:51:55,000
Speaker 2: not easy coming, up you, know especially even WHEN i

1138
00:51:55,080 --> 00:51:57,440
Speaker 2: first start doing, this it was like so much easier

1139
00:51:57,440 --> 00:51:59,600
Speaker 2: than it is. Now like there's just been so much

1140
00:51:59,600 --> 00:52:03,200
Speaker 2: device is, this you, know put into society about you,

1141
00:52:03,239 --> 00:52:05,720
Speaker 2: know people and stuff like for the longest, time, okay beside,

1142
00:52:05,800 --> 00:52:08,719
Speaker 2: smoking it Was, trump Sorry, trump but you, know No,

1143
00:52:08,800 --> 00:52:11,320
Speaker 2: trumpsters you, know and just the list has kept getting

1144
00:52:11,360 --> 00:52:14,680
Speaker 2: longer and. Longer, yeah and uh, yeah they can get pretty.

1145
00:52:14,719 --> 00:52:16,880
Speaker 3: Particular, Yeah i'm sure it's much harder.

1146
00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:19,799
Speaker 1: Now, yeah, YEAH i was gonna, Say with that being,

1147
00:52:19,800 --> 00:52:21,319
Speaker 1: said it seems like you kind of covered. It but

1148
00:52:21,520 --> 00:52:24,200
Speaker 1: what is the easiest part and the hardest? Part per

1149
00:52:24,360 --> 00:52:28,360
Speaker 1: like with your experience for match? MAKERS i, MEAN i,

1150
00:52:28,440 --> 00:52:31,560
Speaker 1: guess like on an, average like it's always something. Different

1151
00:52:31,680 --> 00:52:33,600
Speaker 1: but if there is like a this is the easiest

1152
00:52:33,600 --> 00:52:35,640
Speaker 1: part of doing, this and this is the hardest part

1153
00:52:35,640 --> 00:52:38,439
Speaker 1: of doing, THIS i feel like sometimes sure it could

1154
00:52:38,440 --> 00:52:40,120
Speaker 1: be like a straightforward, answer or sometimes it could be

1155
00:52:40,120 --> 00:52:41,680
Speaker 1: a little bit more. Complex what do you think.

1156
00:52:41,920 --> 00:52:46,040
Speaker 2: Easiest part is definitely when, uh you, know you go

1157
00:52:46,080 --> 00:52:48,839
Speaker 2: in to match somebody and everything kind of just falls into,

1158
00:52:48,920 --> 00:52:51,560
Speaker 2: place and then we always get really excited to hear

1159
00:52:52,120 --> 00:52:55,520
Speaker 2: what the feedback is after a, match and when you

1160
00:52:55,520 --> 00:52:57,240
Speaker 2: hear they spent like two and a half hours together

1161
00:52:57,560 --> 00:52:59,880
Speaker 2: and you, know made plans to see each other. Again

1162
00:53:00,520 --> 00:53:03,759
Speaker 2: just how like nice it was to meet somebody you,

1163
00:53:03,760 --> 00:53:07,360
Speaker 2: know and what they were looking. For that is definitely

1164
00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:12,560
Speaker 2: happy dance. Time the worst part there Few, okay let

1165
00:53:12,600 --> 00:53:14,759
Speaker 2: me tell the. Story, okay one, Time, okay we got

1166
00:53:14,800 --> 00:53:18,319
Speaker 2: this guy signed up out of you, know the big

1167
00:53:18,320 --> 00:53:20,319
Speaker 2: beer mountains up. There he was kind of you, KNOW i,

1168
00:53:20,320 --> 00:53:22,520
Speaker 2: Mean i've gotten half the town as been married because

1169
00:53:22,560 --> 00:53:24,640
Speaker 2: it's a lot of cool, people but the day pool

1170
00:53:24,680 --> 00:53:26,600
Speaker 2: is super. Small same with up in big beer and.

1171
00:53:26,640 --> 00:53:29,400
Speaker 2: Stuff but well they do have access TO. La but,

1172
00:53:29,719 --> 00:53:32,040
Speaker 2: anyway this guy comes in and we signed him on

1173
00:53:32,840 --> 00:53:35,719
Speaker 2: super super nice and he goes on his fur oh

1174
00:53:35,840 --> 00:53:37,759
Speaker 2: and he's seeing how he kind of wants it to

1175
00:53:37,880 --> 00:53:40,280
Speaker 2: keep it up in that, area like you, know general.

1176
00:53:40,360 --> 00:53:43,319
Speaker 2: Vicinity i'm, like, well, dude you keep your boat down

1177
00:53:43,320 --> 00:53:46,200
Speaker 2: in A newport and he's, like, oh, Okay SO i

1178
00:53:46,280 --> 00:53:48,520
Speaker 2: got him to open up that and that was. Beautiful

1179
00:53:48,600 --> 00:53:50,840
Speaker 2: so we matched him up and he gets through on,

1180
00:53:50,920 --> 00:53:55,359
Speaker 2: time and the girl was already. There and we hadn't

1181
00:53:55,400 --> 00:53:59,080
Speaker 2: worked with this girl really but a couple of. Times

1182
00:53:59,160 --> 00:54:02,279
Speaker 2: and she was there at the bar talking about half

1183
00:54:02,320 --> 00:54:05,200
Speaker 2: a dozen guys and it had already been. Drinking oh oh,

1184
00:54:05,320 --> 00:54:08,719
Speaker 2: no yes's, right, okay and that ends up being a

1185
00:54:08,760 --> 00:54:11,400
Speaker 2: reflection on. Us she is no longer working with. Us but,

1186
00:54:11,960 --> 00:54:13,960
Speaker 2: okay here's the. Thing he was super cool about. It

1187
00:54:14,040 --> 00:54:16,719
Speaker 2: he didn't like some guys could like immediately SAY i

1188
00:54:16,760 --> 00:54:19,160
Speaker 2: want a, refund you, know A. Beyonce it's so stupid

1189
00:54:19,200 --> 00:54:21,400
Speaker 2: for you, know allowing this to. Happen this guy was

1190
00:54:21,480 --> 00:54:25,160
Speaker 2: cool and just understood, it you, know for what it. Was,

1191
00:54:26,120 --> 00:54:29,920
Speaker 2: anyway he we sent him out again and the second

1192
00:54:29,960 --> 00:54:33,880
Speaker 2: match that was like three years ago and they're still. Together. Wow,

1193
00:54:34,000 --> 00:54:36,720
Speaker 2: yeah cause they're doing great and he's sending us family

1194
00:54:36,760 --> 00:54:39,799
Speaker 2: members now stuff like. That that's. Amazing but he was

1195
00:54:39,840 --> 00:54:42,399
Speaker 2: just cool and, like cool people have better. Success, yeah

1196
00:54:42,400 --> 00:54:46,000
Speaker 2: if you just yea, more go with the flow and be. Nice, yeah,

1197
00:54:46,080 --> 00:54:47,840
Speaker 2: Absolutely and yeah go to the flow and try to

1198
00:54:47,920 --> 00:54:49,480
Speaker 2: understand because that was definitely out of our.

1199
00:54:49,520 --> 00:54:52,600
Speaker 3: Control, absolutely you can't you, know control what people. Do,

1200
00:54:52,760 --> 00:54:56,560
Speaker 3: yeah but we've got one more, STORY i, believe, yes

1201
00:54:56,800 --> 00:55:00,640
Speaker 3: honeymoon phase versus reality. Stories AND i don't.

1202
00:55:00,520 --> 00:55:02,560
Speaker 2: Know what you would have to think about to say

1203
00:55:02,560 --> 00:55:04,440
Speaker 2: that just came to me in like the least than sixty.

1204
00:55:04,520 --> 00:55:08,279
Speaker 2: Seconds like, honestly in the real, world like off of matchmaking,

1205
00:55:08,400 --> 00:55:11,319
Speaker 2: planet that is like a, huge huge. Factor you, know

1206
00:55:11,360 --> 00:55:13,480
Speaker 2: it's like so typical three, months it's a, joke you,

1207
00:55:13,560 --> 00:55:17,200
Speaker 2: Know eveon phase is. Over but, honestly like because we

1208
00:55:17,239 --> 00:55:19,480
Speaker 2: have the schedule set up where people can put their

1209
00:55:19,480 --> 00:55:21,799
Speaker 2: accounts on hold for like up to a, year so we,

1210
00:55:21,920 --> 00:55:24,680
Speaker 2: monitor you, know or you, know understand when people come

1211
00:55:24,680 --> 00:55:26,920
Speaker 2: off hold and stuff like. That AND i it doesn't

1212
00:55:26,960 --> 00:55:30,239
Speaker 2: happen that much in the world in matchmaking because WELL

1213
00:55:30,280 --> 00:55:32,279
Speaker 2: i can't give away all the secret. Sauce but you,

1214
00:55:32,320 --> 00:55:35,279
Speaker 2: know we do our best and it is a good.

1215
00:55:35,400 --> 00:55:39,400
Speaker 2: Job and they are typically people that have done the

1216
00:55:39,440 --> 00:55:41,400
Speaker 2: work and know how to do the work to, navigate

1217
00:55:41,480 --> 00:55:43,440
Speaker 2: or maybe had parents and they saw their parents working

1218
00:55:43,440 --> 00:55:46,399
Speaker 2: through stuff that comes up in. Life and always there's

1219
00:55:46,440 --> 00:55:48,480
Speaker 2: gonna be stuff that comes up in. Life, yeah and

1220
00:55:48,560 --> 00:55:49,600
Speaker 2: so it just builds on, It.

1221
00:55:49,880 --> 00:55:53,319
Speaker 3: Yeah opie, says we twenty five male and twenty seven

1222
00:55:53,360 --> 00:55:57,040
Speaker 3: to female love each, other but our lifestyles. Don't alie

1223
00:55:57,680 --> 00:56:00,760
Speaker 3: moy says we dated for a, year a little rocky

1224
00:56:00,800 --> 00:56:02,840
Speaker 3: here and, there and then broke things off for the.

1225
00:56:02,880 --> 00:56:05,239
Speaker 3: SUMMER i left for an internship out of, state and

1226
00:56:05,280 --> 00:56:07,880
Speaker 3: we didn't talk for the first few, weeks but eventually

1227
00:56:07,920 --> 00:56:10,200
Speaker 3: stayed in touch with. Texts WHEN i got back in

1228
00:56:10,239 --> 00:56:12,920
Speaker 3: town In, august we reconnected and talked about trying to

1229
00:56:12,920 --> 00:56:16,160
Speaker 3: make things, work addressed issues from the, past and enjoyed

1230
00:56:16,360 --> 00:56:18,799
Speaker 3: one another's. Company we missed each other a, lot and

1231
00:56:18,960 --> 00:56:21,120
Speaker 3: most of our time together was spent kissing and.

1232
00:56:21,160 --> 00:56:22,719
Speaker 2: CUDDLING i was gonna See.

1233
00:56:22,440 --> 00:56:25,200
Speaker 3: I've never felt so in, love And i've also never

1234
00:56:25,239 --> 00:56:27,960
Speaker 3: felt this frustrated with Someone i'm not even committed. To

1235
00:56:28,280 --> 00:56:31,360
Speaker 3: things have been very rocky Since. August we just started

1236
00:56:31,360 --> 00:56:34,320
Speaker 3: seeing each other again after a one month break slash.

1237
00:56:34,360 --> 00:56:37,759
Speaker 3: Breakup i'm twenty seven, female two years. Older i've had

1238
00:56:37,800 --> 00:56:41,480
Speaker 3: a few serious relationships, Before i've been. Married, Wow i'm in.

1239
00:56:41,520 --> 00:56:44,200
Speaker 3: COLLEGE i know WHAT i, WANT i have career goals

1240
00:56:44,480 --> 00:56:47,520
Speaker 3: and things are going. GREAT i stay. Busy health is

1241
00:56:47,560 --> 00:56:51,080
Speaker 3: important to. Me i'm. Independent i'm a. Loner his twenty

1242
00:56:51,080 --> 00:56:55,000
Speaker 3: five male last and first girlfriend wasn't. Serious she was

1243
00:56:55,040 --> 00:56:57,799
Speaker 3: twenty and dumped him through. Text in the year we've.

1244
00:56:57,880 --> 00:57:00,560
Speaker 3: Dated he lived with his mom and worked off jobs

1245
00:57:00,640 --> 00:57:03,000
Speaker 3: or didn't have a, job a big reason why we were.

1246
00:57:03,080 --> 00:57:06,880
Speaker 3: Rocky he's not career motivated and has few goals for his.

1247
00:57:06,960 --> 00:57:10,040
Speaker 3: Future he's doing nothing right now to achieve. Anything he

1248
00:57:10,280 --> 00:57:13,040
Speaker 3: just got a full time. Job he pursued, school but

1249
00:57:13,160 --> 00:57:15,920
Speaker 3: is taking a break after some. Complications he's got a

1250
00:57:15,920 --> 00:57:18,520
Speaker 3: lot of friends and his family is. Great he's much

1251
00:57:18,600 --> 00:57:21,360
Speaker 3: less independent than. Me i'm happy in my life and

1252
00:57:21,400 --> 00:57:23,720
Speaker 3: want a lot more from. IT i actively do things

1253
00:57:23,760 --> 00:57:25,320
Speaker 3: all the time to get WHAT i want out of.

1254
00:57:25,320 --> 00:57:28,160
Speaker 3: Life he's happy in his life and wants more from.

1255
00:57:28,160 --> 00:57:30,320
Speaker 3: IT i do not see or know what he is

1256
00:57:30,400 --> 00:57:33,200
Speaker 3: doing or has done to, progress THOUGH i, ask and

1257
00:57:33,320 --> 00:57:36,960
Speaker 3: communication is a real. Issue sometimes we generally communicate all,

1258
00:57:37,040 --> 00:57:39,440
Speaker 3: right but WHEN i really want information from, him it

1259
00:57:39,520 --> 00:57:42,840
Speaker 3: seems impossible to get without a lot of intuition and.

1260
00:57:42,880 --> 00:57:45,960
Speaker 3: Clarification it's fun to talk about the, future but sharing

1261
00:57:46,000 --> 00:57:49,000
Speaker 3: goals and working to achieve them are different. THINGS i

1262
00:57:49,000 --> 00:57:52,360
Speaker 3: can't say he's particularly motivated to do anything outside of

1263
00:57:52,400 --> 00:57:55,280
Speaker 3: expanding his. Consciousness this was his answer WHEN i asked

1264
00:57:55,320 --> 00:57:58,280
Speaker 3: him what he wanted from life at the, Time, well

1265
00:57:58,800 --> 00:58:02,720
Speaker 3: he's into, psychedelics instances and lucid dreaming and deep experiences like.

1266
00:58:02,800 --> 00:58:05,439
Speaker 3: This other than, THIS i don't know what else he's really.

1267
00:58:05,440 --> 00:58:08,560
Speaker 3: Into he doesn't drink, much he smokes devils let us.

1268
00:58:08,560 --> 00:58:12,600
Speaker 3: Occasionally substances certainly don't rule his. Life many of his

1269
00:58:12,600 --> 00:58:14,880
Speaker 3: friends are like, minded and just about none of his

1270
00:58:14,880 --> 00:58:17,040
Speaker 3: friends have a lot going for. Them in my, OPINION

1271
00:58:17,320 --> 00:58:20,440
Speaker 3: i feel real judgmental, here but it's a personal. PREFERENCE

1272
00:58:20,680 --> 00:58:22,520
Speaker 3: i get that he's happy with his life and they

1273
00:58:22,560 --> 00:58:25,320
Speaker 3: are happy with, hers BUT i don't see happiness. There

1274
00:58:25,600 --> 00:58:28,840
Speaker 3: his friends don't have stable, jobs they move, frequently and

1275
00:58:28,920 --> 00:58:32,000
Speaker 3: more than half have young. Kids. Wow, SEE i was

1276
00:58:32,320 --> 00:58:34,440
Speaker 3: a quick. PAUSE i was going to, say maybe this

1277
00:58:34,520 --> 00:58:36,840
Speaker 3: is because he's twenty five and is a little bit

1278
00:58:36,880 --> 00:58:39,320
Speaker 3: younger than. Her but if they have young, kids it

1279
00:58:39,320 --> 00:58:41,480
Speaker 3: seems like maybe they're in an area where that is

1280
00:58:41,560 --> 00:58:43,160
Speaker 3: more common to start a life.

1281
00:58:43,160 --> 00:58:45,960
Speaker 2: Earlier so it, depends and maybe on THIS i was

1282
00:58:46,000 --> 00:58:48,200
Speaker 2: going to blow out a state, name but it's tightly

1283
00:58:48,240 --> 00:58:50,520
Speaker 2: offensive IF i mentioned a state of people get married

1284
00:58:50,560 --> 00:58:51,240
Speaker 2: and having kids really.

1285
00:58:51,280 --> 00:58:51,440
Speaker 1: Young.

1286
00:58:51,600 --> 00:58:54,720
Speaker 3: Bak all his friends are, single, right, now and many

1287
00:58:54,800 --> 00:58:57,640
Speaker 3: have been in rocky relationships in the. Past i'd be

1288
00:58:57,680 --> 00:59:00,360
Speaker 3: miserable in their lifestyle AND i can't relate to. Them

1289
00:59:00,520 --> 00:59:02,560
Speaker 3: most of my family live like, this and this is

1290
00:59:02,560 --> 00:59:05,240
Speaker 3: WHY i live across the country and rarely see. Them to,

1291
00:59:05,320 --> 00:59:09,720
Speaker 3: me this lifestyle breeds depression and, listlessness AND i explicitly

1292
00:59:09,760 --> 00:59:11,640
Speaker 3: do not want to be around. It some of his

1293
00:59:11,800 --> 00:59:15,160
Speaker 3: friends seem really, great but others make me really. Concerned so,

1294
00:59:15,240 --> 00:59:18,200
Speaker 3: again this guy's amazing to. Me we connect. Deeply we

1295
00:59:18,240 --> 00:59:21,440
Speaker 3: have so much in commons it's. Weird we crave one,

1296
00:59:21,440 --> 00:59:24,840
Speaker 3: another and after a year of rocky, bs we still

1297
00:59:24,920 --> 00:59:27,800
Speaker 3: love and miss each other so, much but our lives

1298
00:59:27,800 --> 00:59:30,000
Speaker 3: have never. LIGNED i gave him the benefit of the

1299
00:59:30,000 --> 00:59:32,760
Speaker 3: doubt with him living with his mom and not, working

1300
00:59:32,840 --> 00:59:35,200
Speaker 3: because he said it was temporary AND i wanted to

1301
00:59:35,200 --> 00:59:37,320
Speaker 3: give him a fair chance to prove. It it's just

1302
00:59:37,400 --> 00:59:39,720
Speaker 3: been a, rollercoaster. THOUGH i don't see how a future

1303
00:59:39,760 --> 00:59:42,720
Speaker 3: will work between us UNTIL i accept he's not really

1304
00:59:42,720 --> 00:59:45,480
Speaker 3: going anywhere and as very little to, offer AND i

1305
00:59:45,520 --> 00:59:48,440
Speaker 3: don't want to accept this in a significant. OTHER i

1306
00:59:48,680 --> 00:59:52,560
Speaker 3: feel insanely. Judgmental and we're just gonna pause right there

1307
00:59:52,600 --> 00:59:54,840
Speaker 3: because that was a lot to take in before we move. On,

1308
00:59:55,200 --> 00:59:57,720
Speaker 3: yeah if you have any thoughts for op so, FAR i.

1309
00:59:57,880 --> 01:00:00,080
Speaker 2: Serious oh my. Gosh well she does not need to

1310
01:00:00,080 --> 01:00:04,200
Speaker 2: hear this because she knows. Already but the whole up

1311
01:00:04,280 --> 01:00:06,920
Speaker 2: and down, thing that's just gonna delete all of her.

1312
01:00:07,160 --> 01:00:08,919
Speaker 2: Energy and it sounds like she has a lot going,

1313
01:00:08,960 --> 01:00:10,840
Speaker 2: on And i'm so proud of her for breaking away

1314
01:00:10,960 --> 01:00:13,000
Speaker 2: of you, know how she was. Raised it sounds, like,

1315
01:00:13,320 --> 01:00:15,760
Speaker 2: uh it's more similar to his. Lifestyle AND i met

1316
01:00:15,760 --> 01:00:17,160
Speaker 2: a lot of those kind of people in The Amazon

1317
01:00:17,240 --> 01:00:19,880
Speaker 2: rainforest WHEN i was, there you, know just being and

1318
01:00:19,920 --> 01:00:22,240
Speaker 2: wanting to check out certain plant medicines and. Stuff but

1319
01:00:23,040 --> 01:00:26,720
Speaker 2: she just needs to move, on and there's chemical warfare.

1320
01:00:26,800 --> 01:00:29,120
Speaker 2: Happening obviously they've been apart for a little over a,

1321
01:00:29,120 --> 01:00:31,040
Speaker 2: month and they're, like, oh BUT i love them so.

1322
01:00:31,120 --> 01:00:34,560
Speaker 2: Much i'm not thinking that might be, love.

1323
01:00:34,480 --> 01:00:37,680
Speaker 3: You, know especially when they've broken up multiple. Times, yeah,

1324
01:00:37,800 --> 01:00:39,480
Speaker 3: YEAH i don't think THAT'S i think that's.

1325
01:00:39,400 --> 01:00:43,280
Speaker 2: Yeah probably. Us, yeah, honestly the science of sleeping with,

1326
01:00:43,320 --> 01:00:45,240
Speaker 2: SOMEBODY i, mean it just makes you want to connect to.

1327
01:00:45,280 --> 01:00:47,720
Speaker 2: Them it's it could be you, know elephant man or,

1328
01:00:47,720 --> 01:00:49,880
Speaker 2: something and you're just like gonna just oh he was really,

1329
01:00:49,920 --> 01:00:52,560
Speaker 2: cool but just, yeah you, know you just she's. Not

1330
01:00:52,680 --> 01:00:55,960
Speaker 2: she needs to take his phone number out of her. Phone,

1331
01:00:56,200 --> 01:00:59,200
Speaker 2: yeah and then put on her wall like all the

1332
01:00:59,240 --> 01:01:02,440
Speaker 2: reasons that she didn't like, them and sorry, buddy whoever you,

1333
01:01:02,480 --> 01:01:03,680
Speaker 2: are but she deserves.

1334
01:01:03,680 --> 01:01:05,880
Speaker 3: Better. YEAH i THINK i think she just needs to

1335
01:01:05,920 --> 01:01:09,080
Speaker 3: find someone who's more in line, with you, know what

1336
01:01:09,160 --> 01:01:09,840
Speaker 3: she wants to do in.

1337
01:01:09,880 --> 01:01:12,439
Speaker 2: LIFE i, mean here's upon. Line AND i was gonna

1338
01:01:12,440 --> 01:01:14,320
Speaker 2: SAY i didn't get to say this about what an

1339
01:01:14,400 --> 01:01:15,840
Speaker 2: entrepreneur might want in.

1340
01:01:15,920 --> 01:01:18,160
Speaker 3: SOMEBODY i feel like that's actually a perfect example.

1341
01:01:18,400 --> 01:01:20,880
Speaker 2: Here somebody that's going to make you a better, person you,

1342
01:01:20,920 --> 01:01:22,840
Speaker 2: know and this guy's going to drain. Her and if

1343
01:01:22,840 --> 01:01:25,360
Speaker 2: she wants to accomplish all the things that she's capable,

1344
01:01:25,400 --> 01:01:28,160
Speaker 2: of she needs to stay away from him and let

1345
01:01:28,200 --> 01:01:30,760
Speaker 2: him go chill and do you, KNOW i don't, know

1346
01:01:30,800 --> 01:01:31,920
Speaker 2: gummies with his. Buddies.

1347
01:01:32,640 --> 01:01:34,440
Speaker 3: NOW i have a lot of friends actually that have

1348
01:01:34,520 --> 01:01:37,280
Speaker 3: like broken out with partners because they feel like they're

1349
01:01:37,280 --> 01:01:41,560
Speaker 3: more focused, on you, know bettering their life and pursuing

1350
01:01:41,600 --> 01:01:43,960
Speaker 3: things and they don't feel like their partner is doing

1351
01:01:44,000 --> 01:01:44,280
Speaker 3: any of.

1352
01:01:44,280 --> 01:01:46,200
Speaker 2: That, Yeah AND i think it's.

1353
01:01:46,320 --> 01:01:48,520
Speaker 3: A super important thing to keep in mind in a,

1354
01:01:48,560 --> 01:01:51,080
Speaker 3: relationship because you don't want someone who's just you, know

1355
01:01:51,320 --> 01:01:54,560
Speaker 3: if doing something with your life and pursuing a career

1356
01:01:54,760 --> 01:01:57,080
Speaker 3: or pursuing something is important to, YOU i feel like

1357
01:01:57,120 --> 01:01:59,800
Speaker 3: you want someone who is going to encourage. That thank.

1358
01:01:59,840 --> 01:02:02,440
Speaker 2: You that's like a huge. Platform, AGAIN i you, know

1359
01:02:02,480 --> 01:02:04,760
Speaker 2: mostly deal with people in their, thirties and that is

1360
01:02:04,880 --> 01:02:07,160
Speaker 2: huge to find somebody that you want to gear up.

1361
01:02:07,200 --> 01:02:08,880
Speaker 2: With that's want you, know you guys are going to

1362
01:02:08,960 --> 01:02:11,080
Speaker 2: launch each, other you, know, yeah, yeah instead of somebody

1363
01:02:11,120 --> 01:02:11,840
Speaker 2: bringing me. Down.

1364
01:02:12,000 --> 01:02:13,720
Speaker 3: Yeah and not to say that she should go with

1365
01:02:13,800 --> 01:02:15,800
Speaker 3: someone like much, older BUT i feel like someone a

1366
01:02:15,800 --> 01:02:18,800
Speaker 3: little bit older or her age might be more in,

1367
01:02:18,840 --> 01:02:21,320
Speaker 3: line just because it seems, like you, know at twenty,

1368
01:02:21,320 --> 01:02:22,760
Speaker 3: five you might not be at that.

1369
01:02:22,840 --> 01:02:24,760
Speaker 2: Stage, yeah, yeah, yeah it sounds like it for. Sure

1370
01:02:24,800 --> 01:02:26,040
Speaker 2: and she's what twenty, seven.

1371
01:02:25,880 --> 01:02:27,680
Speaker 3: She's twenty seventies twenty, five so it's not a huge,

1372
01:02:27,720 --> 01:02:29,920
Speaker 3: difference but, yeah if she wants someone who's like a

1373
01:02:29,960 --> 01:02:31,600
Speaker 3: little bit more sure about what they want to do in.

1374
01:02:31,640 --> 01:02:34,480
Speaker 2: LIFE i interviewed a girl recently In. Colorado she's like

1375
01:02:34,600 --> 01:02:36,920
Speaker 2: twenty seven or twenty, eight And i'm, like, girl you

1376
01:02:36,960 --> 01:02:39,560
Speaker 2: seem like way. Older you, know because she's super cute

1377
01:02:39,560 --> 01:02:42,720
Speaker 2: and fitting and you, know teaches like athletics and. Stuff

1378
01:02:42,720 --> 01:02:44,160
Speaker 2: but she's, LIKE i, KNOW i hear that all the

1379
01:02:44,160 --> 01:02:46,960
Speaker 2: times BECAUSE i hung out with my grandparents mostly her or.

1380
01:02:47,000 --> 01:02:50,200
Speaker 2: Something she says this old soul wisdom and it was really.

1381
01:02:50,280 --> 01:02:52,960
Speaker 2: Refreshing so we matched up with somebody and they really

1382
01:02:53,000 --> 01:02:55,280
Speaker 2: hit it. Off and he mentioned it and she dis

1383
01:02:55,360 --> 01:02:57,240
Speaker 2: must hear it like ten times a. Day, yeah she

1384
01:02:57,280 --> 01:02:58,920
Speaker 2: was super. Cool that's so. Cute, yeah but.

1385
01:02:59,400 --> 01:03:04,200
Speaker 3: Continues he's smart but not. Educated he's interesting but. Unmotivated

1386
01:03:04,320 --> 01:03:06,760
Speaker 3: we share common interests and, goals but we don't seem

1387
01:03:06,800 --> 01:03:08,520
Speaker 3: to be on the same page when it comes to

1388
01:03:08,560 --> 01:03:11,880
Speaker 3: attaining or achieving. Things, furthermore this is really where we

1389
01:03:11,960 --> 01:03:15,120
Speaker 3: end up taking. Breaks the fact that there's breaks plural

1390
01:03:15,240 --> 01:03:16,880
Speaker 3: should be, LIKE i think that's.

1391
01:03:16,920 --> 01:03:17,640
Speaker 2: It that's such a.

1392
01:03:17,640 --> 01:03:21,160
Speaker 3: Buzzkill WHEN i try to have, frank direct conversations about these,

1393
01:03:21,160 --> 01:03:25,160
Speaker 3: concerns he thinks we're breaking, up shuts, down communication doesn't really,

1394
01:03:25,240 --> 01:03:27,120
Speaker 3: happen and we do end up breaking. Up that's a

1395
01:03:27,200 --> 01:03:29,760
Speaker 3: huge red. Flag he's, like, oh when we try to,

1396
01:03:29,800 --> 01:03:30,800
Speaker 3: TALK i just break up with.

1397
01:03:30,880 --> 01:03:33,080
Speaker 2: You in a. WAY i think one of her big

1398
01:03:33,200 --> 01:03:37,800
Speaker 2: pattern problems is she is relating to her mom and

1399
01:03:37,880 --> 01:03:39,560
Speaker 2: dad because it sounds like they came from the same

1400
01:03:39,640 --> 01:03:42,120
Speaker 2: mold and she has got that in her and she

1401
01:03:42,280 --> 01:03:45,480
Speaker 2: needs to do what do they call that family constellations

1402
01:03:45,560 --> 01:03:47,480
Speaker 2: or something where you kind of it's weird saying. It

1403
01:03:47,480 --> 01:03:49,960
Speaker 2: it is really weir and, Nemerine but she needs to

1404
01:03:50,000 --> 01:03:52,440
Speaker 2: really address. That, yeah you, know in whatever way she,

1405
01:03:52,560 --> 01:03:55,680
Speaker 2: performs so she can like cut her losses and move

1406
01:03:55,720 --> 01:03:57,720
Speaker 2: on and focus on her, career which will bring her

1407
01:03:57,760 --> 01:03:59,360
Speaker 2: a lot more, happiness.

1408
01:03:58,840 --> 01:04:01,640
Speaker 3: And she'll probably find people who like in PURSUING i,

1409
01:04:01,680 --> 01:04:04,520
Speaker 3: think what your dreams and pursuing what you want to

1410
01:04:04,520 --> 01:04:06,560
Speaker 3: do in your. LIFE i feel like you just kind

1411
01:04:06,640 --> 01:04:09,240
Speaker 3: of happen upon other people who are like.

1412
01:04:09,280 --> 01:04:13,240
Speaker 2: Minded honeybeasta's love isn't always. Enough, yeah you can't take

1413
01:04:13,240 --> 01:04:13,640
Speaker 2: that to the.

1414
01:04:13,680 --> 01:04:16,720
Speaker 3: Bank, True, okay Hebe he, continues saying he feels like

1415
01:04:16,760 --> 01:04:19,400
Speaker 3: these are issues we can, overcome and yet he breaks

1416
01:04:19,480 --> 01:04:23,000
Speaker 3: up with you feel like he. AGREES i, Agree but

1417
01:04:23,200 --> 01:04:26,000
Speaker 3: how tell me how we can overcome? THEM i feel

1418
01:04:26,160 --> 01:04:29,680
Speaker 3: he's inexperienced and, immature WHICH i don't fault him, for

1419
01:04:29,800 --> 01:04:31,880
Speaker 3: AND i want to work with him On but how

1420
01:04:32,360 --> 01:04:36,240
Speaker 3: how CAN i handle relationship issues plus maturity. Issues it

1421
01:04:36,280 --> 01:04:38,960
Speaker 3: feels like too, much but then he feels we can overcome.

1422
01:04:39,000 --> 01:04:41,400
Speaker 3: THIS i want to make this. Work i'm so crazy

1423
01:04:41,440 --> 01:04:43,200
Speaker 3: about him And i'd love to be in a real,

1424
01:04:43,280 --> 01:04:46,120
Speaker 3: relationship but this is so draining THAT i keep calling it.

1425
01:04:46,200 --> 01:04:48,760
Speaker 3: Quits he's hurt when we take, breaks And i'm hurt

1426
01:04:48,800 --> 01:04:51,640
Speaker 3: we can't resolve an issue in one, conversation and that

1427
01:04:51,720 --> 01:04:53,600
Speaker 3: there are a thousand issues to me and all of

1428
01:04:53,600 --> 01:04:55,600
Speaker 3: them are not that big of a deal and we

1429
01:04:55,600 --> 01:04:58,400
Speaker 3: can work through. This in his, eyes we're seeing each other.

1430
01:04:58,440 --> 01:05:00,800
Speaker 3: AGAIN i don't want to hurt him. Anymore i'd like

1431
01:05:00,840 --> 01:05:03,919
Speaker 3: a serious relationship and he still can't offer. One how

1432
01:05:03,960 --> 01:05:06,080
Speaker 3: CAN i change my perspective on all of? This or

1433
01:05:06,120 --> 01:05:08,520
Speaker 3: should we just stop seeing each other for? Good and

1434
01:05:09,440 --> 01:05:10,240
Speaker 3: that's the end of that.

1435
01:05:10,360 --> 01:05:12,680
Speaker 2: Story, no, no, NO i have to be able to say.

1436
01:05:12,680 --> 01:05:15,080
Speaker 3: Something. Yeah, no. Absolutely she is like a spring.

1437
01:05:15,480 --> 01:05:17,560
Speaker 2: Chicken she thinks her life is going to be. Over

1438
01:05:17,880 --> 01:05:20,960
Speaker 2: AND i hate to keep reverting to these case studies

1439
01:05:21,000 --> 01:05:23,120
Speaker 2: that come out of these, universities BUT i think it

1440
01:05:23,160 --> 01:05:26,880
Speaker 2: Was harvard and people that are showing super high signs

1441
01:05:26,880 --> 01:05:28,880
Speaker 2: of intelligent. Life they don't get married until they're like

1442
01:05:28,960 --> 01:05:31,160
Speaker 2: these days until their early. Thirties And i'm a witness

1443
01:05:31,200 --> 01:05:34,040
Speaker 2: to this with our clients in their, twenties they're, like you,

1444
01:05:34,040 --> 01:05:36,440
Speaker 2: know finishing up school in late, twenties starting to get

1445
01:05:36,440 --> 01:05:38,680
Speaker 2: their corporate game on and then enjoying that for a.

1446
01:05:38,680 --> 01:05:40,760
Speaker 2: While and then early, thirties you, know like that's when

1447
01:05:40,800 --> 01:05:42,680
Speaker 2: you want to i mean date and have. Fun but,

1448
01:05:42,920 --> 01:05:46,720
Speaker 2: UH i mean don't don't rush. It, yeah and, yeah

1449
01:05:46,960 --> 01:05:49,960
Speaker 2: quit going. BACK i mean you're doing the Whole einstein,

1450
01:05:50,000 --> 01:05:53,080
Speaker 2: thing repeating mistakes and it's not in your best. Interests,

1451
01:05:53,400 --> 01:05:55,360
Speaker 2: no not at. All and he'll be. Fine don't worry about.

1452
01:05:55,400 --> 01:05:57,160
Speaker 2: Him don't worry about hurting. Him he's hurting.

1453
01:05:57,200 --> 01:06:00,240
Speaker 3: You, yeah it's not helping him. Either so, yeah but

1454
01:06:00,320 --> 01:06:01,960
Speaker 3: that's the end of that. Story and we actually do

1455
01:06:02,040 --> 01:06:04,000
Speaker 3: have one more, story if we do have time for.

1456
01:06:04,040 --> 01:06:05,080
Speaker 1: That, Yeah, leslie how are you?

1457
01:06:05,080 --> 01:06:14,520
Speaker 2: DOING i got all? Day, Awesome i'm. Fine up on

1458
01:06:14,600 --> 01:06:15,480
Speaker 2: the freeway at.

1459
01:06:15,520 --> 01:06:20,520
Speaker 3: Three oh, yeah get? Worse, yeah, yeah, absolutely all, right

1460
01:06:20,600 --> 01:06:20,960
Speaker 3: when are you?

1461
01:06:21,040 --> 01:06:22,880
Speaker 1: Ready is it JUST i think it's part of that same,

1462
01:06:22,920 --> 01:06:23,280
Speaker 1: one is?

1463
01:06:23,320 --> 01:06:27,480
Speaker 3: It? No? No, yeah, DIFFERENT i think it's a, different

1464
01:06:28,440 --> 01:06:31,240
Speaker 3: but you can read. Different, Yeah so he says a

1465
01:06:31,320 --> 01:06:34,440
Speaker 3: long business trip has caused me thirty two female to

1466
01:06:34,600 --> 01:06:38,640
Speaker 3: reconsider myself and my marriage thirty six male of four.

1467
01:06:38,760 --> 01:06:43,520
Speaker 3: Years business TRIP ta, says, first some basic information about our.

1468
01:06:43,520 --> 01:06:46,000
Speaker 3: Relationship my husband AND i have WHAT i thought was a,

1469
01:06:46,040 --> 01:06:49,920
Speaker 3: happy successful, marriage if a little clinging and. Codependent we

1470
01:06:49,960 --> 01:06:52,640
Speaker 3: both work very long. Hours in what little free time we,

1471
01:06:52,720 --> 01:06:55,400
Speaker 3: have we spend together basically joined the. Hit we don't

1472
01:06:55,440 --> 01:06:59,560
Speaker 3: have many friends because we prefer being together. Alone that

1473
01:06:59,640 --> 01:07:00,680
Speaker 3: always this worries.

1474
01:07:00,800 --> 01:07:01,439
Speaker 2: Me, yeah.

1475
01:07:01,560 --> 01:07:04,360
Speaker 3: Yeah we joke about how silly it is that we

1476
01:07:04,400 --> 01:07:06,600
Speaker 3: have such a big house because we're almost never even

1477
01:07:06,600 --> 01:07:08,800
Speaker 3: in different. Rooms we both gained a lot of weight

1478
01:07:08,840 --> 01:07:11,760
Speaker 3: in the last few. Years he's quite tall And i'm quite,

1479
01:07:11,760 --> 01:07:14,480
Speaker 3: short And i'd guess he's gained about a one hundred

1480
01:07:14,520 --> 01:07:17,720
Speaker 3: pounds And i've gained about. Sixty proportionally, similar we went

1481
01:07:17,760 --> 01:07:20,240
Speaker 3: from being normal sized people to fat. People it's no

1482
01:07:20,320 --> 01:07:23,160
Speaker 3: mystery why this. Happened we love eating out our restaurants

1483
01:07:23,200 --> 01:07:25,960
Speaker 3: together and staying in and WATCHING tv and movies or

1484
01:07:26,000 --> 01:07:28,440
Speaker 3: playing video games all night with a couple of pizzas

1485
01:07:28,480 --> 01:07:30,919
Speaker 3: and a bag Of doritos or. Whatever it felt really

1486
01:07:30,960 --> 01:07:33,400
Speaker 3: fun and, comfortable and both of us reassured the other

1487
01:07:33,520 --> 01:07:36,040
Speaker 3: that we still found them attractive and the spicy sleet

1488
01:07:36,080 --> 01:07:37,960
Speaker 3: was still. Great every now and then one of us

1489
01:07:37,960 --> 01:07:40,800
Speaker 3: would say we should eat better or exercise, more but

1490
01:07:40,920 --> 01:07:42,840
Speaker 3: we never kept it up for more than a day or.

1491
01:07:42,840 --> 01:07:45,640
Speaker 3: Two my normal job consists of me sitting in an

1492
01:07:45,640 --> 01:07:48,840
Speaker 3: isolated cubicle for eight to twelve hours a, day staring

1493
01:07:48,840 --> 01:07:52,640
Speaker 3: at emails and. SPREADSHEETS i rarely talk to anyone this.

1494
01:07:53,160 --> 01:07:55,880
Speaker 3: ALL i, mean the wake, game you, know it happens

1495
01:07:55,920 --> 01:07:57,120
Speaker 3: for many. Reasons.

1496
01:07:57,160 --> 01:07:59,080
Speaker 2: Overnight, YEAH i think.

1497
01:07:58,880 --> 01:08:01,840
Speaker 3: That can happen for many different. Reasons BUT i think,

1498
01:08:02,160 --> 01:08:05,600
Speaker 3: overall the issue here seems to be that they're becoming. Complacent.

1499
01:08:05,800 --> 01:08:07,320
Speaker 2: YEAH i went to that for a.

1500
01:08:07,320 --> 01:08:10,320
Speaker 3: While, yeah AND i think that is a little bit.

1501
01:08:10,360 --> 01:08:12,200
Speaker 3: Worrisome that they don't want to hang out with anyone

1502
01:08:12,200 --> 01:08:13,600
Speaker 3: else and they just want to be very.

1503
01:08:13,640 --> 01:08:17,360
Speaker 2: Insular that's not, uncommon, Though it's just not necessarily healthy

1504
01:08:17,439 --> 01:08:18,920
Speaker 2: and there's like a lot of ways to spend that

1505
01:08:19,040 --> 01:08:21,400
Speaker 2: in the long. RUN i don't think it's, healthy you.

1506
01:08:21,439 --> 01:08:25,080
Speaker 2: KNOW i, mean it's just gonna maybe end up being

1507
01:08:25,160 --> 01:08:27,040
Speaker 2: their worst. Enemy right, now they think they're all, cool

1508
01:08:27,080 --> 01:08:28,960
Speaker 2: they don't need, anybody but, yeah but that might be

1509
01:08:29,040 --> 01:08:29,880
Speaker 2: their demise down the.

1510
01:08:29,960 --> 01:08:32,400
Speaker 3: ROAD i think, SO i, Mean OPI's already bringing it.

1511
01:08:32,520 --> 01:08:34,479
Speaker 3: UP i think it's LIKE i think she's beginning to

1512
01:08:34,520 --> 01:08:37,080
Speaker 3: notice that there's an. Issue, YEAH i rarely talk to.

1513
01:08:37,080 --> 01:08:39,280
Speaker 3: Anyone my company needed someone to go To asia for

1514
01:08:39,280 --> 01:08:42,160
Speaker 3: two months as a direct contact with. Vendors the person

1515
01:08:42,200 --> 01:08:44,840
Speaker 3: who was supposed to go got seriously ill at the last.

1516
01:08:44,880 --> 01:08:47,439
Speaker 3: Second BECAUSE i helped prepare the materials for that, person

1517
01:08:47,479 --> 01:08:50,599
Speaker 3: they asked me to go. INSTEAD i was really nervous about.

1518
01:08:50,600 --> 01:08:54,120
Speaker 3: IT i have social, anxiety and this requires sales, pitches,

1519
01:08:54,200 --> 01:08:57,640
Speaker 3: presentations and a lot of high pressure socializing with strangers

1520
01:08:57,680 --> 01:09:00,840
Speaker 3: in foreign. Countries so directly the opposite Of, wow she's

1521
01:09:00,880 --> 01:09:02,960
Speaker 3: been living for the past couple of. Years. YEAH i

1522
01:09:03,000 --> 01:09:05,680
Speaker 3: THOUGHT i would miss my husband like, crazy but it

1523
01:09:05,760 --> 01:09:08,479
Speaker 3: was also a huge. Opportunity my husband was sad that

1524
01:09:08,520 --> 01:09:12,120
Speaker 3: we'd be apart for so, long were very. SUPPORTIVE i,

1525
01:09:12,120 --> 01:09:15,639
Speaker 3: THINK i know where this is. Going my trip is almost,

1526
01:09:15,680 --> 01:09:20,040
Speaker 3: over and to my, Surprise i've actually had an amazing. Time.

1527
01:09:20,439 --> 01:09:22,759
Speaker 3: YEAH i think of, peace, realizing, oh, wow it's actually

1528
01:09:22,840 --> 01:09:25,559
Speaker 3: nice to spend time outside of your. Partner.

1529
01:09:25,680 --> 01:09:26,840
Speaker 2: Wow, yeah that's.

1530
01:09:26,920 --> 01:09:29,559
Speaker 3: Incredible i've done my job really well and add some

1531
01:09:29,640 --> 01:09:34,200
Speaker 3: incredible sight seeing, experiences and to my surprise and, HORROR

1532
01:09:34,360 --> 01:09:37,759
Speaker 3: i haven't missed my husband at. All. Hmmm i've loved living.

1533
01:09:37,760 --> 01:09:42,439
Speaker 3: Alone i've loved the control and, independence exploring such exotic

1534
01:09:42,479 --> 01:09:45,160
Speaker 3: places all on my, own and meeting and talking to new.

1535
01:09:45,160 --> 01:09:47,400
Speaker 3: People i've lost a lot of weight because the food

1536
01:09:47,439 --> 01:09:49,840
Speaker 3: in these countries is lighter and smaller portion than In,

1537
01:09:49,920 --> 01:09:52,360
Speaker 3: america not down to my pre wedding, way BUT i

1538
01:09:52,400 --> 01:09:54,960
Speaker 3: still had to buy smaller. PANTS i also realized that

1539
01:09:55,040 --> 01:09:57,439
Speaker 3: my husband AND i are kind of slobs because the

1540
01:09:57,439 --> 01:10:00,280
Speaker 3: apartments the company put me in are so, small one

1541
01:10:00,320 --> 01:10:03,360
Speaker 3: dirty dish can feel gross and. Oppressive So i've been

1542
01:10:03,439 --> 01:10:06,479
Speaker 3: extremely neat and organized in our giant house in the.

1543
01:10:06,520 --> 01:10:08,960
Speaker 3: Suburbs you can spread the mess out all month before

1544
01:10:08,960 --> 01:10:11,479
Speaker 3: it starts to get. Unbearable now That i'm about to go,

1545
01:10:11,560 --> 01:10:14,120
Speaker 3: HOME i feel. Conflicted part of me can't wait to

1546
01:10:14,120 --> 01:10:17,160
Speaker 3: go home and, relax sink into the couch in my husband's,

1547
01:10:17,240 --> 01:10:20,000
Speaker 3: arms order delivery from our favorite. Place part of me

1548
01:10:20,120 --> 01:10:23,480
Speaker 3: is horrified at myself for being such a, weak, codependent

1549
01:10:23,680 --> 01:10:26,880
Speaker 3: reclusive mess for years when APPARENTLY i could be, independent,

1550
01:10:27,080 --> 01:10:31,439
Speaker 3: resourceful sociable and. Healthy i'm even fantasizing about leaving my,

1551
01:10:31,520 --> 01:10:34,840
Speaker 3: wonderful loving. Husband but THEN i think this trip was a,

1552
01:10:34,880 --> 01:10:37,879
Speaker 3: short weird, thing like a, vacation not like real, life

1553
01:10:37,960 --> 01:10:40,000
Speaker 3: AND i was happy in my real. LIFE i haven't

1554
01:10:40,040 --> 01:10:42,240
Speaker 3: said anything to my husband about any of. This he

1555
01:10:42,320 --> 01:10:45,040
Speaker 3: knows about the weight loss because we FaceTime pretty, often

1556
01:10:45,280 --> 01:10:47,519
Speaker 3: but not HOW i. Feel IF i bring up wanting

1557
01:10:47,560 --> 01:10:49,360
Speaker 3: to change things in our, LIFE i think it will

1558
01:10:49,400 --> 01:10:52,200
Speaker 3: come across as a huge. Surprise AND i don't even know,

1559
01:10:52,280 --> 01:10:54,720
Speaker 3: what if, ANYTHING i want to change or what to.

1560
01:10:54,800 --> 01:10:57,800
Speaker 3: Say where DO i go from? Here and there is an?

1561
01:10:57,840 --> 01:10:59,400
Speaker 3: Update but do you need to hear?

1562
01:11:00,160 --> 01:11:04,920
Speaker 1: SHE i think she was summerre thirty thirty, Two, yeah thirty.

1563
01:11:04,920 --> 01:11:05,960
Speaker 1: Two her husband is thirty.

1564
01:11:06,000 --> 01:11:09,720
Speaker 2: Six ANYTIME i hear, something, okay this isn't like, well,

1565
01:11:09,800 --> 01:11:12,160
Speaker 2: yeah it kind of, is LIKE i it's a big

1566
01:11:12,200 --> 01:11:14,360
Speaker 2: part of our questionnaire is about your family and your

1567
01:11:14,400 --> 01:11:16,879
Speaker 2: parents and how you're. Raised AND i have a feeling

1568
01:11:17,120 --> 01:11:20,479
Speaker 2: like she's going into that comfort. ZONE i, MEAN i

1569
01:11:20,520 --> 01:11:23,479
Speaker 2: was the only woman in our family to ever, work you,

1570
01:11:23,520 --> 01:11:25,840
Speaker 2: know and it was weird at, first you, Know AND

1571
01:11:25,880 --> 01:11:28,840
Speaker 2: i can kind of like, sadly don't tell, anybody but

1572
01:11:29,600 --> 01:11:34,160
Speaker 2: relate to that, relationship you, know and it will end

1573
01:11:34,240 --> 01:11:36,639
Speaker 2: up being her. Demise. Yeah, YEAH i MEAN i can't

1574
01:11:36,600 --> 01:11:39,720
Speaker 2: say a hundred, percent but it doesn't end.

1575
01:11:39,800 --> 01:11:43,559
Speaker 3: Well probably do you think that it would BE i don't.

1576
01:11:43,600 --> 01:11:45,080
Speaker 3: Know do you think it would be helpful if she

1577
01:11:45,200 --> 01:11:47,680
Speaker 3: had that conversation and like do you think that you

1578
01:11:47,680 --> 01:11:50,160
Speaker 3: would should they would actually see some change in YOUR.

1579
01:11:50,200 --> 01:11:52,320
Speaker 2: O that's always good like to get you, know if they.

1580
01:11:52,360 --> 01:11:55,400
Speaker 2: Can of, course that's so LIKE i like NEVER i

1581
01:11:55,439 --> 01:11:57,840
Speaker 2: couldn't LIKE i regretted saying those words a second, ago

1582
01:11:58,040 --> 01:12:00,360
Speaker 2: because people should always like try to work through something

1583
01:12:00,400 --> 01:12:03,040
Speaker 2: AND i never recommend for somebody to break up, enlist

1584
01:12:03,040 --> 01:12:06,240
Speaker 2: there's like violence or something involved in this obviously is

1585
01:12:06,280 --> 01:12:10,519
Speaker 2: the opposite. Complacency, yeah but, yeah they should talk it.

1586
01:12:10,600 --> 01:12:13,679
Speaker 3: Through, YEAH i, THINK i, MEAN i think it really

1587
01:12:13,760 --> 01:12:15,840
Speaker 3: is going to be a lot on op to just

1588
01:12:16,080 --> 01:12:19,400
Speaker 3: hold strong and not become complacent again and not fall

1589
01:12:19,439 --> 01:12:22,639
Speaker 3: into that pattern that she's so used. To, yeah BECAUSE

1590
01:12:22,960 --> 01:12:23,760
Speaker 3: i think it is really.

1591
01:12:23,760 --> 01:12:26,920
Speaker 2: Easy And i'm afraid he's gonna like maybe do some

1592
01:12:27,240 --> 01:12:30,320
Speaker 2: mental stuff because he doesn't want to lose. Her she's

1593
01:12:30,320 --> 01:12:32,320
Speaker 2: probably the best thing that's ever happened to. Him, maybe

1594
01:12:32,360 --> 01:12:34,680
Speaker 2: and he might have been to her, too but she this,

1595
01:12:34,760 --> 01:12:37,920
Speaker 2: happens especially when you're. Younger one person will elevate the other.

1596
01:12:38,000 --> 01:12:41,519
Speaker 2: PERSON i don't, know it can be, problematic so hold.

1597
01:12:41,600 --> 01:12:45,240
Speaker 3: Strong yeah to what you want in. Life. YEAH i

1598
01:12:45,280 --> 01:12:47,880
Speaker 3: don't have kids, Yet, yeah, exactly so can make those.

1599
01:12:47,960 --> 01:12:50,920
Speaker 3: CHANGES i wasn't expecting to update so, quickly but NOW

1600
01:12:50,960 --> 01:12:53,880
Speaker 3: i THINK i painted an overly rosy picture of our

1601
01:12:53,920 --> 01:12:57,400
Speaker 3: relationship in the last. Post, OH i think she's really

1602
01:12:57,439 --> 01:13:01,720
Speaker 3: like having this moment of realization after this. Trip M i,

1603
01:13:01,760 --> 01:13:04,320
Speaker 3: think having been away so, LONG i remembered it is

1604
01:13:04,360 --> 01:13:06,439
Speaker 3: better than it. Is when he picks me up at the,

1605
01:13:06,479 --> 01:13:09,080
Speaker 3: airport he hugged me and, mumbled you're so. Skinny i'm

1606
01:13:09,080 --> 01:13:11,679
Speaker 3: actually still pretty, overweight but not as bad as. BEFORE

1607
01:13:12,600 --> 01:13:14,880
Speaker 3: i wanted to enthuse about my, trip BUT i was

1608
01:13:14,920 --> 01:13:17,960
Speaker 3: really exhausted from jet, lag and he seemed distant and,

1609
01:13:18,000 --> 01:13:20,160
Speaker 3: weird so we just didn't talk much on the drive.

1610
01:13:20,200 --> 01:13:22,479
Speaker 3: Home as soon as we were inside in the, house

1611
01:13:22,760 --> 01:13:25,760
Speaker 3: he burst into, tears going off about HOW i was

1612
01:13:25,800 --> 01:13:28,959
Speaker 3: gonna leave him now AND i couldn't possibly find him attractive,

1613
01:13:28,960 --> 01:13:31,960
Speaker 3: anymore and how he ated his body and. HIMSELF i

1614
01:13:32,080 --> 01:13:35,040
Speaker 3: was really taken aback and still so TIRED i could barely.

1615
01:13:35,080 --> 01:13:37,880
Speaker 3: STAND i tried to comfort, him but also Said i'm,

1616
01:13:37,920 --> 01:13:40,439
Speaker 3: sorry we'll have to talk about this. LATER i really

1617
01:13:40,680 --> 01:13:43,040
Speaker 3: need to. Sleep, YEAH i, mean she just flew back

1618
01:13:43,040 --> 01:13:44,439
Speaker 3: from Like, asia that's a long. Flight.

1619
01:13:44,640 --> 01:13:46,320
Speaker 2: YEAH i want to choose him of being selfish and,

1620
01:13:46,320 --> 01:13:47,960
Speaker 2: stuff but he like had all that time just to

1621
01:13:48,000 --> 01:13:50,720
Speaker 2: get in his head and be super. Insecure, yeah so he.

1622
01:13:50,800 --> 01:13:53,400
Speaker 3: Exploded it was four am WHEN i woke. Up my

1623
01:13:53,479 --> 01:13:56,439
Speaker 3: husband was still up at his. COMPUTER i suggested either

1624
01:13:56,479 --> 01:13:58,840
Speaker 3: he get some sleep before work or we go out for,

1625
01:13:58,880 --> 01:14:02,240
Speaker 3: breakfast and he chose over. BREAKFAST i thought out loud

1626
01:14:02,240 --> 01:14:04,800
Speaker 3: about applying to switch to the other sub, team which

1627
01:14:04,800 --> 01:14:07,679
Speaker 3: would involve a lot of. Travel i'd be gone about

1628
01:14:07,680 --> 01:14:11,080
Speaker 3: a third of the. Year my husband started crying again

1629
01:14:11,200 --> 01:14:13,160
Speaker 3: and SAID i just wanted to get away from, him

1630
01:14:13,200 --> 01:14:15,360
Speaker 3: and this was the start of us growing. Apart he

1631
01:14:15,439 --> 01:14:17,760
Speaker 3: said he was miserable WHILE i was In, asia and

1632
01:14:17,800 --> 01:14:19,760
Speaker 3: IF i wanted to travel, more we should do it,

1633
01:14:19,800 --> 01:14:21,839
Speaker 3: together and that IF i really loved, HIM i wouldn't

1634
01:14:21,840 --> 01:14:24,200
Speaker 3: want to sleep somewhere else for a solid third of our.

1635
01:14:24,240 --> 01:14:26,639
Speaker 3: Lives it was kind of embarrassing that he was crying

1636
01:14:26,720 --> 01:14:29,080
Speaker 3: like this in. Public SO i just agreed that traveling

1637
01:14:29,080 --> 01:14:32,200
Speaker 3: together made. Sense he brought up the weight thing again not,

1638
01:14:32,360 --> 01:14:34,960
Speaker 3: me and said that the reason it's so difficult is

1639
01:14:35,000 --> 01:14:37,960
Speaker 3: because we works so. Much he's gone from six am

1640
01:14:38,040 --> 01:14:41,439
Speaker 3: to eight Pm monday To, friday, wow including, commute and

1641
01:14:41,600 --> 01:14:44,320
Speaker 3: often goes in On sundays to do catch up around.

1642
01:14:44,400 --> 01:14:47,719
Speaker 3: Deadvinees he sometimes works as late as. Midnight my hours

1643
01:14:47,720 --> 01:14:50,240
Speaker 3: aren't as, bad but, Close he, said he can't see

1644
01:14:50,240 --> 01:14:53,439
Speaker 3: where he'd fit in more. Exercise we have so little free,

1645
01:14:53,439 --> 01:14:55,880
Speaker 3: time and we're both so tired all the. Time it's

1646
01:14:55,880 --> 01:14:58,080
Speaker 3: no wonder we end up in front of THE tv with.

1647
01:14:58,120 --> 01:15:00,880
Speaker 3: Takeout the conversation was making me you feel trapped and,

1648
01:15:00,960 --> 01:15:04,040
Speaker 3: hopeless AND i, snapped maybe you should quit your. Job, then,

1649
01:15:04,280 --> 01:15:06,360
Speaker 3: HONESTLY i feel like that is maybe not what he

1650
01:15:06,400 --> 01:15:08,479
Speaker 3: wants to, hear BUT i think that is if he's

1651
01:15:08,560 --> 01:15:09,640
Speaker 3: upset with the amount of.

1652
01:15:09,640 --> 01:15:11,800
Speaker 2: Hours so who wants you to? Quit story space.

1653
01:15:11,840 --> 01:15:14,760
Speaker 3: Out, oh he wants her husband to quit his job

1654
01:15:14,800 --> 01:15:16,560
Speaker 3: because he keeps them planning and SAYING i don't have

1655
01:15:16,600 --> 01:15:19,040
Speaker 3: any time to, exercise AND i work these late hours

1656
01:15:19,040 --> 01:15:19,559
Speaker 3: And i'm always.

1657
01:15:19,640 --> 01:15:23,960
Speaker 2: Tired she suggested that, yeah, whoo who. Woo, Yeah, no,

1658
01:15:24,880 --> 01:15:28,880
Speaker 2: NO i don't want to muddy the. Waters but, UH i,

1659
01:15:28,880 --> 01:15:31,160
Speaker 2: mean what good will that? Do, okay first of, all

1660
01:15:31,280 --> 01:15:33,800
Speaker 2: you can always find, time you, know that's like such

1661
01:15:33,800 --> 01:15:36,120
Speaker 2: a lame. THING i, mean you know you have to

1662
01:15:36,200 --> 01:15:38,160
Speaker 2: and if you want to be, more he can get

1663
01:15:38,200 --> 01:15:41,040
Speaker 2: twice as much. Done maybe if he, exercises you, know

1664
01:15:41,080 --> 01:15:43,080
Speaker 2: you'll be more for you can get more energy.

1665
01:15:43,080 --> 01:15:43,280
Speaker 3: Too.

1666
01:15:43,439 --> 01:15:46,599
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, Yeah SO i don't. Know that just sounds

1667
01:15:46,600 --> 01:15:50,240
Speaker 2: like a you know what, show and she should step.

1668
01:15:50,280 --> 01:15:52,880
Speaker 2: Back they should get some, therapy because Absolutely i'm not a,

1669
01:15:52,920 --> 01:15:56,360
Speaker 2: therapist AND i just think they should get professional. Help and,

1670
01:15:56,560 --> 01:15:58,200
Speaker 2: UH i think we all know where it's.

1671
01:15:58,200 --> 01:16:00,800
Speaker 3: Going, yeah he, said that's not. Helpful that's not a real.

1672
01:16:00,840 --> 01:16:04,080
Speaker 3: Suggestion in my last, POST i described our spicy sleep

1673
01:16:04,120 --> 01:16:07,120
Speaker 3: life as, great BUT i guess great when we have

1674
01:16:07,240 --> 01:16:10,200
Speaker 3: it would be more. Accurate and BEFORE i left it

1675
01:16:10,240 --> 01:16:12,720
Speaker 3: was down to maybe once a. Month we talked about that,

1676
01:16:12,760 --> 01:16:15,080
Speaker 3: too and we agreed that it's no one's fault and

1677
01:16:15,160 --> 01:16:17,640
Speaker 3: we both want more spicy sleep in the, abstract but

1678
01:16:17,720 --> 01:16:20,040
Speaker 3: on a day to day, basis we feel too tired

1679
01:16:20,080 --> 01:16:23,240
Speaker 3: and sluggish and gross to, initiate or they're just is in.

1680
01:16:23,360 --> 01:16:26,559
Speaker 3: Time he went straight to, work nothing. Resolved i've been

1681
01:16:26,600 --> 01:16:29,680
Speaker 3: alone in the house mulling maybe we should quit our

1682
01:16:29,760 --> 01:16:32,240
Speaker 3: jobs and find the ones where we can work, less

1683
01:16:32,400 --> 01:16:36,200
Speaker 3: scale down our, expenses sell our house and. Life, YEAH i,

1684
01:16:36,240 --> 01:16:39,639
Speaker 3: MEAN i feel like the best Solution i've heard was him,

1685
01:16:39,680 --> 01:16:41,800
Speaker 3: saying maybe we should. Travel if they want to work on,

1686
01:16:41,840 --> 01:16:44,080
Speaker 3: it maybe they should travel together. More you, know you

1687
01:16:44,080 --> 01:16:45,040
Speaker 3: could have that. Experience.

1688
01:16:45,120 --> 01:16:46,799
Speaker 2: Yeah AND i don't know what it is about, travel

1689
01:16:46,800 --> 01:16:48,320
Speaker 2: but it seems like come, out come, out whoever you,

1690
01:16:48,320 --> 01:16:50,479
Speaker 2: are happens when you. Travel oh, yeah so, yeah.

1691
01:16:50,360 --> 01:16:52,160
Speaker 3: You go on the, trip putting yourself under the.

1692
01:16:52,160 --> 01:16:53,120
Speaker 2: Stress, yes see what.

1693
01:16:53,160 --> 01:16:55,240
Speaker 3: Happens, well it's the point of working all the day

1694
01:16:55,360 --> 01:16:57,280
Speaker 3: time if we're just going to be fat and tired

1695
01:16:57,320 --> 01:16:59,360
Speaker 3: and not enjoying. Life it's been one day AND i

1696
01:16:59,360 --> 01:17:01,600
Speaker 3: feel like a show was a long time ago or

1697
01:17:01,680 --> 01:17:04,280
Speaker 3: never happened at, all and at. It just to, CLARIFY

1698
01:17:04,320 --> 01:17:06,360
Speaker 3: i didn't mean for us to have this. Conversation right

1699
01:17:06,400 --> 01:17:08,599
Speaker 3: WHEN i got, HOME i Thought i'd take some time

1700
01:17:08,640 --> 01:17:13,000
Speaker 3: to readjust and think about, things research counseling, recipes a cleaning,

1701
01:17:13,040 --> 01:17:15,800
Speaker 3: service trips we could, take and the other subtem SO

1702
01:17:16,120 --> 01:17:20,080
Speaker 3: i could come to my husband with concrete specific suggestions

1703
01:17:20,320 --> 01:17:22,080
Speaker 3: when he had a meltdown as soon as we got

1704
01:17:22,120 --> 01:17:23,960
Speaker 3: in the. Door it felt like we had no choice

1705
01:17:23,960 --> 01:17:26,599
Speaker 3: but to talk as soon as, possible AND i just wasn't.

1706
01:17:26,640 --> 01:17:29,839
Speaker 3: READY i was jet lagged and undecided about many. Things

1707
01:17:30,120 --> 01:17:33,439
Speaker 3: instead of offering, solutions we just circled around and around

1708
01:17:33,439 --> 01:17:37,879
Speaker 3: our problems and made things seem. Unsolvable EVERYTHING i suggested

1709
01:17:37,920 --> 01:17:40,439
Speaker 3: he shot, down saying we had no. TIME i had no.

1710
01:17:40,560 --> 01:17:43,120
Speaker 3: Idea he was so. Unhappy WHILE i was. Away we

1711
01:17:43,240 --> 01:17:46,920
Speaker 3: communicated pretty often by instant message and, video and he

1712
01:17:47,040 --> 01:17:49,720
Speaker 3: seemed cheerful and. NORMAL i also didn't expect that he

1713
01:17:49,720 --> 01:17:52,200
Speaker 3: would find my weight loss so. Upsetting it's not very

1714
01:17:52,280 --> 01:17:54,920
Speaker 3: dramatic at. ALL i doubt anyone other than my husband

1715
01:17:54,920 --> 01:17:58,639
Speaker 3: would even, notice And i'm still significantly. OVERWEIGHT i didn't

1716
01:17:58,640 --> 01:18:01,080
Speaker 3: even know that he was unhappy his. Body he's never

1717
01:18:01,120 --> 01:18:03,759
Speaker 3: talked about it like, this crying and saying he hates

1718
01:18:03,840 --> 01:18:06,640
Speaker 3: himself And i'm gonna leave. Him we actually moved to

1719
01:18:06,640 --> 01:18:08,920
Speaker 3: the suburbs to be closer to his, work but then

1720
01:18:08,960 --> 01:18:11,680
Speaker 3: his company at switch buildings twice and now it's an

1721
01:18:11,680 --> 01:18:15,920
Speaker 3: hour and a half. Away oh that's. Tough sometimes something

1722
01:18:16,000 --> 01:18:18,840
Speaker 3: that is confusing to me about the. Comments is the

1723
01:18:18,880 --> 01:18:22,800
Speaker 3: amount we work really that? Abnormal he commutes three hours a,

1724
01:18:22,880 --> 01:18:25,920
Speaker 3: day works nine to ten. HOURS i don't think that

1725
01:18:26,040 --> 01:18:29,000
Speaker 3: nine to ten hours is super, abnormal but.

1726
01:18:29,120 --> 01:18:31,719
Speaker 1: Three hour commute three hours pretty?

1727
01:18:32,080 --> 01:18:35,880
Speaker 3: Wild it, is, Nilly, yeah it must be two mile. Radius,

1728
01:18:35,920 --> 01:18:39,720
Speaker 3: YEAH i commute ninety minutes a, day work eight to ten.

1729
01:18:39,760 --> 01:18:42,639
Speaker 3: Hours most people we know work drive this, much and

1730
01:18:42,720 --> 01:18:45,160
Speaker 3: oh and they make it work somehow still have kids and,

1731
01:18:45,240 --> 01:18:47,880
Speaker 3: hobbies not all of them over. Aweight SO i don't

1732
01:18:47,880 --> 01:18:50,519
Speaker 3: know why we're unable to. Manage his job is also

1733
01:18:50,600 --> 01:18:52,920
Speaker 3: a big part of his, identity and these hours are

1734
01:18:52,960 --> 01:18:55,880
Speaker 3: common throughout his. Industry asking him to quit seems very.

1735
01:18:56,040 --> 01:18:59,040
Speaker 3: Radical to work less within his field would require a

1736
01:18:59,080 --> 01:19:02,639
Speaker 3: big step down in terms of prestige and how interesting

1737
01:19:02,680 --> 01:19:05,479
Speaker 3: the work would, be not just the. Money, ironically he

1738
01:19:05,600 --> 01:19:07,960
Speaker 3: has his dream, job but no room in his life

1739
01:19:08,000 --> 01:19:10,000
Speaker 3: for anything else that is.

1740
01:19:10,040 --> 01:19:11,080
Speaker 2: Tricky he's a software.

1741
01:19:11,080 --> 01:19:14,120
Speaker 3: Guy, YEAH i was thinking like software or like like

1742
01:19:14,200 --> 01:19:14,600
Speaker 3: some sort of.

1743
01:19:14,720 --> 01:19:16,800
Speaker 1: Tech, ye, yeah.

1744
01:19:16,560 --> 01:19:19,880
Speaker 2: That sounds pretty. Normal, well get up half an hour, earlier,

1745
01:19:20,160 --> 01:19:22,400
Speaker 2: yeah thirty minutes and it'll make your.

1746
01:19:22,439 --> 01:19:24,920
Speaker 3: Day. YEAH i think it's like when you you, know

1747
01:19:24,960 --> 01:19:26,800
Speaker 3: not not even in terms of like losing, weight but

1748
01:19:26,920 --> 01:19:30,840
Speaker 3: just like having exercise is just super important just to

1749
01:19:30,880 --> 01:19:34,559
Speaker 3: make you feel. Good not even like about like what you.

1750
01:19:34,640 --> 01:19:36,639
Speaker 3: Weigh that's NOT i don't think that's super. Important it's

1751
01:19:36,720 --> 01:19:37,640
Speaker 3: just like DO i have?

1752
01:19:37,840 --> 01:19:39,880
Speaker 2: Energy, yeah and get out in? Nature?

1753
01:19:39,960 --> 01:19:41,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah having that, yeah oh my.

1754
01:19:41,880 --> 01:19:44,040
Speaker 2: Gosh just like so many people don't realize how we've

1755
01:19:44,080 --> 01:19:46,320
Speaker 2: been put into these boxes and we weren't like this

1756
01:19:46,360 --> 01:19:46,920
Speaker 2: for the longest.

1757
01:19:46,960 --> 01:19:50,960
Speaker 3: Time and, yeah it's having those moments in nature is super.

1758
01:19:51,000 --> 01:19:55,479
Speaker 3: IMPORTANT I i, MEAN i know WHENEVER i like don't

1759
01:19:55,560 --> 01:19:58,640
Speaker 3: leave the house BECAUSE i live here and, yeah AND

1760
01:19:58,640 --> 01:20:01,240
Speaker 3: i work from. Home so it's like SOMETIMES i don't

1761
01:20:01,280 --> 01:20:03,360
Speaker 3: like go on my walks And i'm, like, AH i

1762
01:20:03,360 --> 01:20:05,360
Speaker 3: feel like a dog wasn't and. Walked i'm LIKE i

1763
01:20:05,640 --> 01:20:06,080
Speaker 3: need a. God.

1764
01:20:07,640 --> 01:20:09,719
Speaker 2: Yeah and then when you walk it's concrete. Jungle.

1765
01:20:09,920 --> 01:20:13,559
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah fortunately we kind of live in a pretty. Neighborhood,

1766
01:20:13,640 --> 01:20:16,080
Speaker 3: yeah for, sure but it is also important to go

1767
01:20:16,120 --> 01:20:17,920
Speaker 3: in like, hikes, yeah exactly actual.

1768
01:20:18,000 --> 01:20:20,559
Speaker 2: Nature it was weird interviewing people DURING covid because you'd

1769
01:20:20,600 --> 01:20:23,120
Speaker 2: see these like top amazing executives and they're locked in

1770
01:20:23,120 --> 01:20:25,400
Speaker 2: their apartment, yeah and they're just like want to look

1771
01:20:25,439 --> 01:20:26,519
Speaker 2: like they want to jump out the. Window.

1772
01:20:27,120 --> 01:20:30,120
Speaker 3: YEAH i only HAD covid, once BUT i was this

1773
01:20:30,240 --> 01:20:32,679
Speaker 3: was in, college AND i was in my little loft

1774
01:20:33,360 --> 01:20:35,120
Speaker 3: room and the apartment THAT i lived in with my,

1775
01:20:35,200 --> 01:20:37,479
Speaker 3: roommates and because THEY i didn't want them to get,

1776
01:20:37,520 --> 01:20:39,320
Speaker 3: it SO i was just, like it's stuck in, there

1777
01:20:39,479 --> 01:20:41,919
Speaker 3: nice all day and it's like this little tiny.

1778
01:20:42,200 --> 01:20:43,559
Speaker 2: Room i'm sorry. Nice.

1779
01:20:43,600 --> 01:20:45,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, Yeah, NO i THINK i told.

1780
01:20:45,240 --> 01:20:46,920
Speaker 2: YOU i was In mexico and THEN i heard about

1781
01:20:46,920 --> 01:20:49,800
Speaker 2: this one store opening up in Sey elita AND i

1782
01:20:49,840 --> 01:20:51,960
Speaker 2: just drove down there wanted to drive by or, something

1783
01:20:52,080 --> 01:20:55,080
Speaker 2: AND i swear the whole town was like sitting at

1784
01:20:55,120 --> 01:20:57,360
Speaker 2: bars like three inches apart from each, other drinking and

1785
01:20:57,360 --> 01:21:01,519
Speaker 2: having a. Blast Could. Yeah but that's the end of.

1786
01:21:01,439 --> 01:21:05,839
Speaker 3: The, story all, right is the, Yeah and that's the whole.

1787
01:21:05,920 --> 01:21:09,200
Speaker 3: Thing do you want to introduce yourself one more time

1788
01:21:09,280 --> 01:21:10,839
Speaker 3: and plug yourself? Wherever?

1789
01:21:11,080 --> 01:21:16,160
Speaker 2: Oh, Okay Actually I'm leslie AND i am a matchmaker

1790
01:21:16,280 --> 01:21:19,960
Speaker 2: With Ambiance. MATCHMAKING i am the. Founder we've been in

1791
01:21:20,040 --> 01:21:24,360
Speaker 2: business almost twenty five years and there's a lot of

1792
01:21:24,360 --> 01:21:26,599
Speaker 2: matchmakers out there these. Days WHEN i first, started there

1793
01:21:26,640 --> 01:21:29,760
Speaker 2: was like me in a handful and uh grown so

1794
01:21:30,360 --> 01:21:33,880
Speaker 2: super and uh you, know IF i have an advice to

1795
01:21:34,160 --> 01:21:36,920
Speaker 2: like all you singles out, THERE i would, say make

1796
01:21:36,960 --> 01:21:38,840
Speaker 2: sure you find. UH i, mean there's a lot of

1797
01:21:38,840 --> 01:21:41,000
Speaker 2: smart people out, there AND i remember my dad was

1798
01:21:41,040 --> 01:21:44,160
Speaker 2: saying they're smart than there's, wise and wisdom comes with

1799
01:21:44,320 --> 01:21:47,160
Speaker 2: like maturity and. Stuff and you really want somebody if

1800
01:21:47,160 --> 01:21:48,920
Speaker 2: you're going to be a pain, client especially you, know

1801
01:21:48,960 --> 01:21:51,400
Speaker 2: it's like a major investment and you want a matchmaker

1802
01:21:51,400 --> 01:21:54,680
Speaker 2: that takes it as seriously as as you. Do you,

1803
01:21:54,680 --> 01:21:56,400
Speaker 2: know we think it's like one of the most important

1804
01:21:56,400 --> 01:21:58,680
Speaker 2: decisions of your, life like you, know having a roof

1805
01:21:58,720 --> 01:22:00,760
Speaker 2: of your head super. Important but you end up with

1806
01:22:01,040 --> 01:22:03,120
Speaker 2: under that riff can make all the, difference you, know

1807
01:22:03,160 --> 01:22:05,840
Speaker 2: in the. World and if you can't afford, it, uh,

1808
01:22:06,040 --> 01:22:08,680
Speaker 2: yes just go and do a singles, database you, know

1809
01:22:08,880 --> 01:22:11,200
Speaker 2: and maybe check in every now and. Then you, know

1810
01:22:11,439 --> 01:22:13,240
Speaker 2: we do have a thing where if they do pay

1811
01:22:13,280 --> 01:22:15,200
Speaker 2: to do the interview and decide just to be in

1812
01:22:15,200 --> 01:22:17,320
Speaker 2: the singles, database it gets them on a radar more

1813
01:22:17,600 --> 01:22:20,320
Speaker 2: and uh you, KNOW i mean with thousands of people

1814
01:22:20,360 --> 01:22:22,640
Speaker 2: in our singles, database so you, know don't always know

1815
01:22:22,640 --> 01:22:25,479
Speaker 2: who's all in. There but, yeah there's ways of uh you,

1816
01:22:25,560 --> 01:22:27,840
Speaker 2: know getting through especially if you're in our main age,

1817
01:22:27,880 --> 01:22:32,120
Speaker 2: category which is, uh you, know thirties and uh and uh,

1818
01:22:32,160 --> 01:22:35,040
Speaker 2: yeah and don't rush things and don't Think i'm going

1819
01:22:35,120 --> 01:22:37,160
Speaker 2: to die single when you're twenty seven and you think

1820
01:22:37,200 --> 01:22:39,000
Speaker 2: you might have made the wrong, choice you, know give

1821
01:22:39,040 --> 01:22:43,120
Speaker 2: yourself some. Slack we're, all you, know making wrong decisions

1822
01:22:43,120 --> 01:22:44,760
Speaker 2: all the, time but you got to learn from, them

1823
01:22:44,840 --> 01:22:45,360
Speaker 2: not repeat.

1824
01:22:45,400 --> 01:22:47,720
Speaker 1: Them that's. Life. Yeah, yeah, yeah that's.

1825
01:22:47,760 --> 01:22:48,680
Speaker 2: Great that's ALL i.

1826
01:22:48,720 --> 01:22:51,360
Speaker 3: Got, no thank, you thank you for helping, us for

1827
01:22:51,400 --> 01:22:52,040
Speaker 3: you to these stories.

1828
01:22:52,040 --> 01:22:55,280
Speaker 2: Today that's fun your thoughts, Fat, yeah it was fun

1829
01:22:55,479 --> 01:22:56,240
Speaker 2: watching the comments go.

1830
01:22:56,320 --> 01:22:58,920
Speaker 3: Back. Yeah, no the comments are, great but thank you

1831
01:22:58,960 --> 01:23:00,000
Speaker 3: so much for joining. Us.

1832
01:23:00,080 --> 01:23:02,880
Speaker 2: Leslie oh, SORRY i don't recommend it, either go and

1833
01:23:02,960 --> 01:23:07,040
Speaker 2: let out a mask AND i just. Drove yeah, no,

1834
01:23:06,920 --> 01:23:12,080
Speaker 2: no thank you, said it's been. Awesome thank. You oh

1835
01:23:12,080 --> 01:23:12,920
Speaker 2: that's her. Again, yeah we're.

1836
01:23:12,920 --> 01:23:14,679
Speaker 3: Buddy, yeah we have we've got Some do we have Any,

1837
01:23:15,000 --> 01:23:17,200
Speaker 3: yeah comments or, donations.

1838
01:23:17,160 --> 01:23:18,679
Speaker 1: Just the one don't know appear around a purple.

1839
01:23:18,760 --> 01:23:21,760
Speaker 3: Trader, Uh joba, SAYS i hope she's enjoyed her time

1840
01:23:21,800 --> 01:23:23,680
Speaker 3: on there as much as we have enjoyed having her on,

1841
01:23:23,760 --> 01:23:26,559
Speaker 3: here BECAUSE i think she. Does i'm so glad you

1842
01:23:26,600 --> 01:23:29,200
Speaker 3: guys like, this and thank you for coming. On it was.

1843
01:23:29,240 --> 01:23:35,639
Speaker 2: Fun that's totally WHY i drove up here and stuff

1844
01:23:36,200 --> 01:23:38,760
Speaker 2: and all the great. Questions, amazing that's what we.

1845
01:23:38,800 --> 01:23:42,200
Speaker 1: WANT i. Guess one question From Kim foyne over, here my, Friend,

1846
01:23:42,479 --> 01:23:46,040
Speaker 1: yes Can leslie confirm Whether midwestern men are in high?

1847
01:23:46,040 --> 01:23:48,120
Speaker 1: Demand if they're what in high?

1848
01:23:48,200 --> 01:23:52,439
Speaker 2: Demand, oh you, know all men are in high. Demand,

1849
01:23:53,280 --> 01:23:57,000
Speaker 2: honestly that's pretty. Global BUT i will say that they

1850
01:23:57,160 --> 01:24:00,240
Speaker 2: make good. HUSBANDS i noticed in Our chicago. Office it's

1851
01:24:00,280 --> 01:24:02,720
Speaker 2: really interesting seeing the personality of every, city and uh

1852
01:24:03,160 --> 01:24:05,400
Speaker 2: it's super family. Oriented you, know you think of it

1853
01:24:05,439 --> 01:24:07,639
Speaker 2: as a mini Me New york or, something but it's

1854
01:24:07,680 --> 01:24:10,679
Speaker 2: a whole different animal and they're very family, oriented very money.

1855
01:24:10,720 --> 01:24:14,639
Speaker 2: Oriented but, Uh, TULSA i Mean, Tulsa chicago guys Are

1856
01:24:14,720 --> 01:24:18,320
Speaker 2: midwest men in. General they want a good relationship just

1857
01:24:18,360 --> 01:24:20,439
Speaker 2: as much as a. Woman women we got a factor

1858
01:24:20,479 --> 01:24:22,720
Speaker 2: in not as much as men these, days but uh or,

1859
01:24:22,760 --> 01:24:25,320
Speaker 2: ever you, know like the lifeline if you want to

1860
01:24:25,360 --> 01:24:27,799
Speaker 2: do the family and stuff like. That but, uh, yeah

1861
01:24:27,880 --> 01:24:30,479
Speaker 2: they just make really good husbands and women good women

1862
01:24:30,520 --> 01:24:33,080
Speaker 2: are in high demand as. Well so LIKE i really

1863
01:24:33,520 --> 01:24:36,360
Speaker 2: just refuse to hear one way or the, other because

1864
01:24:36,400 --> 01:24:38,400
Speaker 2: if you think it then and then if you speak

1865
01:24:38,439 --> 01:24:40,880
Speaker 2: it or type, it you know it might end up being.

1866
01:24:40,920 --> 01:24:42,160
Speaker 2: It and you know that's not you, know.

1867
01:24:42,400 --> 01:24:43,200
Speaker 3: No one put it out in the.

1868
01:24:43,240 --> 01:24:46,160
Speaker 2: World, yeah Manifest, yeah so know your guy is out.

1869
01:24:46,200 --> 01:24:49,840
Speaker 2: There and, uh Actually, february, Man i'm gonna. Goog febry

1870
01:24:49,840 --> 01:24:52,200
Speaker 2: is supposed to be a huge manifesting. Month so just

1871
01:24:52,240 --> 01:24:55,320
Speaker 2: like totally uh profess you know what you want and

1872
01:24:55,439 --> 01:24:58,600
Speaker 2: think it and strive to be it and uh that's you,

1873
01:24:58,640 --> 01:25:02,439
Speaker 2: know super important and uh, yeah always be positive and

1874
01:25:02,720 --> 01:25:04,479
Speaker 2: so hard but just always do your best to be.

1875
01:25:04,520 --> 01:25:07,160
Speaker 2: Positive so think positive about it and put yourself in

1876
01:25:07,200 --> 01:25:08,480
Speaker 2: our singles database.

1877
01:25:08,920 --> 01:25:14,599
Speaker 3: And with that you will find a. Partner but thank

1878
01:25:14,640 --> 01:25:16,559
Speaker 3: you so much for coming. On did you already plug

1879
01:25:16,600 --> 01:25:17,520
Speaker 3: your Website.

1880
01:25:17,439 --> 01:25:23,400
Speaker 2: Ambiance matchmaking dot? Com and if you can't spell, it sorry.

1881
01:25:22,520 --> 01:25:26,680
Speaker 3: You can't join the singles but we'll have. Keyon do you?

1882
01:25:26,680 --> 01:25:28,479
Speaker 3: WANNAH i think it's?

1883
01:25:28,520 --> 01:25:30,479
Speaker 1: You, yeah, yeah, okay.

1884
01:25:30,600 --> 01:25:32,679
Speaker 3: PERFECT i will walk you out and we'll switch over

1885
01:25:33,640 --> 01:25:33,960
Speaker 3: camera