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Speaker 1: Lisa Lampanelli is not a licensed therapist or life coach.

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Speaker 1: She is a meddling advice giving yanta. I know it all,

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Speaker 1: and her words come from her head, her heart, and

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Speaker 1: often out of her ass. This podcast should not be

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Speaker 1: misconstrued as therapy. I should be taken with a huge

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Speaker 1: strain of salt for entertainment purposes only.

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Speaker 2: These You need help, you're the problems. Come on, come down,

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Speaker 2: go cleam, take a pill.

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Speaker 3: I think you're insane. Do what I say, dumb ass,

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Speaker 3: listen to me, you and welcome back. I'm singing because

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Speaker 3: today on this episode, I'm shrink. This was Lisa Rabbinati

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Speaker 3: second episodisode of season two. We have a special guest.

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Speaker 3: Why is Broadway legend? We have Chris O'Neill, my friend,

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Speaker 3: fellow teacher, artiste Broadway legend.

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Speaker 4: Yes, I am the legend. That is totally correct.

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Speaker 3: Well, it's so funny about Chris. Is I when this

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Speaker 3: college and they actually are quite good. It's a school

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Speaker 3: called the Norwalk Conservatory of the Arts or for the Arts.

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Speaker 3: I don't know which one of four. I don't give

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Speaker 3: a fuck because guests sue if I call it it,

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Speaker 3: that's what it is, so I get recruited to teach

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Speaker 3: there by this guy who runs it called Danny, and

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Speaker 3: Danny trecks me down and he goes, do you want it?

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Speaker 3: Of course, he stalks me on Instagram. He's like, uh,

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Speaker 3: do you want to do a guest lecture? Maybe? I

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Speaker 3: go hell, no, I want to teach there because I

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Speaker 3: want to fancy myself a professor, and he goes, well,

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Speaker 3: we have a great stand up teacher. Also, I'm like

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Speaker 3: thinking to myself, I've never heard of this boob. I've

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Speaker 3: never heard of this. If he's not someone i've heard of,

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Speaker 3: he can't be that good. And then I meet you

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Speaker 3: and it's like, hi, five years on Broad and I'm like,

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Speaker 3: fuck you, Chris O'Neil.

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Speaker 4: Know what was really cool is what he was like, Uh,

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Speaker 4: do you you want to have lunch with Lisa Lampanelli

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Speaker 4: where we're seeing if she wants to teach here? And

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Speaker 4: I was like, oh, yeah, yeah, that's okay.

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Speaker 3: Really super scared, I'd take your place. No, you should

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Speaker 3: have been. This is how I am telling you. It's true.

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Speaker 4: No, but it was cool. It was like when we

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Speaker 4: met in the coffee shop. In my head, I'm like,

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Speaker 4: oh God, it's like a first date. I was like,

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Speaker 4: I gotta be cool, Like, what do I say? She's

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Speaker 4: done everything? So what am I going an impressor withhi?

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Speaker 4: Blah blah blah. And then we just started yapping. I

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Speaker 4: was like, Oh, this is great. I know.

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Speaker 3: The great thing is that, unlike a first date, I

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Speaker 3: did not let you finger me. That's because you know.

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Speaker 4: You made that right off the bat. You let me

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Speaker 4: know that.

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Speaker 3: I said, I have boundaries, girl, I got limit you

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Speaker 3: know what.

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Speaker 4: I suspect that, and that's why I love you.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. Now, you are a very terrific performer. You're a

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Speaker 3: terrific teacher. And the reason I decided that I wanted

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Speaker 3: you on the show was because we have talked extensively

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Speaker 3: about therapy. Now, by the way, I'm just gonna say

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Speaker 3: off the bat, I am a huge advocate for therapy.

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Speaker 3: I oftentimes wear a sweatshirt that says go to therapy

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Speaker 3: because I think that's a message most people need to hear.

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Speaker 3: So when you and I met, I'm gonna tell you

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Speaker 3: the truth. I said, this guy, I like him, but

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Speaker 3: he's all over the place.

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Speaker 4: Oh yeah, he.

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Speaker 3: Can't concentrate, he's on tangents, he's a. You're what we

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Speaker 3: call a loose cannon.

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Speaker 4: You sound like my tea is going up, I know.

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Speaker 3: And I was like, I know, I like him, but

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Speaker 3: I don't know if we will I ever be more

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Speaker 3: than acquaintances because that energy is tough for me because

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Speaker 3: I'm like, oh my god, look, I don't know what

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Speaker 3: direction the conversation is going. It's crazy. It's like off

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Speaker 3: the walls. And I'm bad enough as I am, so

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Speaker 3: I said this Chris, goddamnit, he needs therapy. But I'm like,

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Speaker 3: I can't tell you need therapy. And I remember one

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Speaker 3: day you said, hey, guess what because I just drop

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Speaker 3: in therapy with every conversation, Like, I don't think I've

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Speaker 3: ever had a conversation where I'm like, my therapist says

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Speaker 3: this thought. I don't know if I helped plant the

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Speaker 3: seat or just gave you a little push, or if

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Speaker 3: it wasn't it was just a coincidence. One day you

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Speaker 3: said to me last year, like, oh, I decided to

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Speaker 3: go to therapy. It's going so well. Yeah, And I

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Speaker 3: just noticed, dude, seriously, you're still the same great personality,

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Speaker 3: but I'm like, you're so much more chill with conversation

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Speaker 3: and you're not all over the place anymore. What do

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Speaker 3: you think is that something you credit therapy for.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it's it's weird because I can't obviously hear myself

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Speaker 4: sometimes because I get really excited and it's like a

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Speaker 4: snowball effect that I'm over here and I'm over here. Yeah.

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Speaker 4: I've always been like a strong advocate for therapy because

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Speaker 4: I have a lot of friends that go, and it's

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Speaker 4: definitely helped them out.

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Speaker 3: Right.

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Speaker 4: I don't know what it was about my thing, Like,

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Speaker 4: I don't know if I was scared secretly or if

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Speaker 4: it was just the process of definding a therapist and

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Speaker 4: the wind blows and I'm thinking of something else. But

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Speaker 4: finally my wife was kind of like, let's lock lock

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Speaker 4: in and let's let's make this work. And I met

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Speaker 4: this really great woman, my therapist, and I remember our

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Speaker 4: first meeting. I didn't know what to expect.

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Speaker 3: And did she let you finger her? Yeah, which is

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Speaker 3: a great home mark me. They call that immersion therapy

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Speaker 3: immerse in your ass. So you have a female therapist.

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Speaker 3: I'm very enthused about that. Do you think that was

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Speaker 3: was she? Did you want to have a female therapist

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Speaker 3: or did it just sort of unfold that way kind

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Speaker 3: of did.

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Speaker 4: I don't know what something about the energy. I mean,

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Speaker 4: I'm like, I'm this, I'm the only guy in in

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Speaker 4: a house full of women, have two daughters, my wife,

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Speaker 4: and my dog, and I just I don't know what

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Speaker 4: it is. I feel like there's a calming presence and

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Speaker 4: I don't know, it's just a it's a different take

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Speaker 4: on things. But I remember she she's super chill, super cool.

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Speaker 4: I didn't know what to expect, kind of terrified. But

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Speaker 4: I was at the point where I was like, I

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Speaker 4: feel like it's spilling over, like the stress and everything

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Speaker 4: is like spilling over. And she was kind of like, uh,

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Speaker 4: you know, how's it going. And I just was like

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Speaker 4: and I just let it go. I just start crying.

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Speaker 4: It was the weirdest. She didn't say anything crazy.

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Speaker 3: Of course, of course, it just did. It just was

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Speaker 3: it that she just created that safety for you.

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Speaker 4: I guess I think it was kind of like one

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Speaker 4: of those little safe havens, like this is the place

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Speaker 4: that I can work on things that I need work

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Speaker 4: on right now, and uh yeah, it was like Tuesdays, huh.

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Speaker 4: And I just was like, god, Tuesdays and she was like,

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Speaker 4: whoa Okay, what's what's all that? And I go, I

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Speaker 4: don't know, but immediately getting that out, just that initial

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Speaker 4: like dump.

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Speaker 3: Was like, oh, this feels great.

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Speaker 4: Wow, not that I took a dump, but you know,

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Speaker 4: my emotional dump after.

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Speaker 3: That real good. Any type of dump feels good. I

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Speaker 3: will often say to my co host Nick, who isn't

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Speaker 3: here because he's at therapy right now. I often say Nick,

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Speaker 3: when I take a dump before I do the podcast,

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Speaker 3: not to be graphic, but boy, is that cleansing.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: So the emotional dump of therapy, the physical dump of

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Speaker 3: going to the bathroom. Who are just getting rid of

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Speaker 3: toxic stuff?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Now, so you're how old?

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Speaker 4: I'm forty three?

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Speaker 3: Forty three, so you had never been to a shrink before? No,

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Speaker 3: that is wild to me, especially as a performer who

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Speaker 3: performed a lot in New York. Yeah, because the whole

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Speaker 3: thing is like New Yorkers go to therapy. That's what

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Speaker 3: they and we do, right, we're.

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Speaker 4: All kind of like neurotic and stuff. And I feel

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Speaker 4: like growing up, I've always kind of been the one

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Speaker 4: that would try to help people with their problems.

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Speaker 3: Hm.

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Speaker 4: A therapist would laugh a lot because I would always

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Speaker 4: start with like, how you doing.

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Speaker 3: I don't even want to think my shrink has an existence.

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Speaker 3: All I know she's a little British lady in the

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Speaker 3: screen named Pixie, which is quite a glory. Yes, and

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Speaker 3: she's very small, which I enjoy very much. If she

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Speaker 3: was a gall of size, Pixie would not fit her.

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Speaker 3: I'm gonna say, really fit her, Like ironically, it would

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Speaker 3: be beautiful for a character. I will say, I don't

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Speaker 3: like the small talk. So did you find you were

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Speaker 3: deflecting a little with the small talk, like putting off

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Speaker 3: like or does it just help you get settled in?

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Speaker 4: I don't know, but this is what I like, the

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Speaker 4: way things work. And I think this is why I

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Speaker 4: love comedy so much. I love how things are connected

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Speaker 4: and why why do I feel like this? And why

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Speaker 4: does this cause this? And I'm just fascinated with that,

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Speaker 4: whether it's comedy or emotional stuff. And I don't know

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Speaker 4: what I was doing. I think it was just kind

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Speaker 4: of like that like knee jerk, like let's start a

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Speaker 4: conversation and let's get to know each other and that

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Speaker 4: kind of thing. And still, if I ever have if

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Speaker 4: I'm going into a session, I'm like, what do I

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Speaker 4: talk about today? Do I talk about this, I get

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Speaker 4: in my head about it, and then it's never that

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Speaker 4: I built something up and then we just talk and

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Speaker 4: I don't I can't really like, what did you talk

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Speaker 4: about today? We just kind of talked and it was great.

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Speaker 4: I don't know why it felt great. There was no

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Speaker 4: like lesson of the day. I mean there's lessons throughout

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Speaker 4: and things that I connect and learn, but it just

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Speaker 4: makes me feel better. It kind of resets me.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's a great way to put it. Do you

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Speaker 3: feel like because I have noticed? I mean, you're a

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Speaker 3: phenomenal stand up teacher. I'm like, clearly an enormous celebrity,

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Speaker 3: very bon Vemont gal about town, very famous. As you know,

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Speaker 3: I'm a pretty good teacher. I'm a little tougher. I'm

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Speaker 3: a little like do this, do that your mother's cunt?

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Speaker 3: You know that kind of thing. You're like really good

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Speaker 3: at drawing stories out of these kids. I don't have

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Speaker 3: the patience. I go pick something and talk about it.

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Speaker 3: Stop being stupid. That's my method of teaching. You're a

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Speaker 3: great teacher, and I think that all over the place.

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Speaker 3: Energy helps you a lot as a teacher, because you're like,

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Speaker 3: oh my god, why did you develop that develop that

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Speaker 3: my head would fucking fall off. But I love the

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Speaker 3: way you teach. But I've noticed it, Like I said,

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Speaker 3: you're more focused in conversation off when we're not in

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Speaker 3: the classroom or whatever. You're like, hey man, blah blah.

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Speaker 3: Did you start to notice that about yourself? Because I

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Speaker 3: noticed it.

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Speaker 4: Yeah. What was great is I found you as like

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Speaker 4: a great friend but also just like going to you

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Speaker 4: and going like checking and going. You know, I did

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Speaker 4: this and I talked to this therapist and she said this,

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Speaker 4: and I'm good, and you have a very comforting war

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Speaker 4: like as you know how you may come across to

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Speaker 4: some people. You are a very warm and loving, an

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Speaker 4: open person. And you are that kind of safe haven

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Speaker 4: for me at work when we go there and I

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Speaker 4: get to just open up about stuff, and I don't know,

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Speaker 4: I think there's like a sense of safety and calm,

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Speaker 4: and you always have a really cool take on certain things.

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Speaker 4: I remember one time I had I said, you know,

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Speaker 4: my therapist said, of course, I forgot what she said.

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Speaker 4: She was like, think about this. I couldn't figure out

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Speaker 4: exactly what she was trying to get at, and I

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Speaker 4: was like, does she mean this? And you sat me

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Speaker 4: down and you were like, I think she's talking about

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Speaker 4: this right, And I was like, holy shit, that's great.

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Speaker 4: So it's a really cool mentor thing where I can

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Speaker 4: come to you and I feel like there's a sense

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Speaker 4: of calm. And maybe that's.

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Speaker 3: Why I think you're bringing more calm to it than

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Speaker 3: you had been. Yeah, because you trust me. You were

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Speaker 3: the never the you were always a guy'd be thrilled

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Speaker 3: to death to see and be like hello dude. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: but I just sensed a more secure feeling within you.

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Speaker 3: And you used to do a lot of that. That's

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Speaker 3: just me sadd and all this shit, and I'm always like, oh,

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Speaker 3: fucking living by his diagnosis, Like why don't we just

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Speaker 3: fucking use that as an excuse to be a mental patient.

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Speaker 3: But you now are just so like you're very grounded,

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Speaker 3: in my opinion. Has anyone else noticed that about you

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Speaker 3: as your wife?

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Speaker 4: She must have. Yeah, my wife and her are. We're

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Speaker 4: like each other's therapists all the time, which is really great.

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Speaker 4: We have a really great chemistry with that. So it's

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Speaker 4: like an always evolving thing. There's never like checkpoints where

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Speaker 4: they go you look, you seem different, right, It's just

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Speaker 4: kind of we evolve together. And but I think one

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Speaker 4: thing is just kind of looking back at like ADHD

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Speaker 4: was a huge thing and now it's like everyone's got

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Speaker 4: in all this shit. But it's like that's a big

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Speaker 4: thing now with like social media. Have you ever done

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Speaker 4: this and this? And here's some ways and I'm like

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Speaker 4: checking rebox. Oh and there's something therapeutic in that, And

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Speaker 4: I think that kind of helped me go to therapy,

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Speaker 4: just connecting dots and going, oh shit, that's how I

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Speaker 4: That's why I do this, right, that's why I do this.

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Speaker 4: That makes sense. And I'm going back to like when

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Speaker 4: I was a little kid, this is why I did

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Speaker 4: Like this was this, this was this, and all these

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Speaker 4: pieces started connecting and I felt like a whole person.

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Speaker 4: I was like, oh my god, this makes a lot

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Speaker 4: of sense. And with that, I think comes a lot

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Speaker 4: of like, oh shit, I should really talk to someone

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Speaker 4: about this, because that's a really it's a big deal,

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Speaker 4: a big deal to kind of connect dots and go, wow,

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Speaker 4: that poor kid had no idea why. So it's it's

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Speaker 4: kind of wild.

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Speaker 3: When you say that poor kid because honestly, as you know,

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Speaker 3: acting funny or a brash on the show or whatever,

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Speaker 3: Like I really do a ton of work like things

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Speaker 3: in the morning, Like there's a meditation practice, a sitting practice,

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Speaker 3: there's a journaling practice. I do a reading practice. So

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Speaker 3: the yesterday during I have to do for coaching school,

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Speaker 3: this thirty minute sitting practice where it's silent, it is

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Speaker 3: just with your eyes semi open and just noticing the

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Speaker 3: breath and the whole thing of it. Just feel what

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Speaker 3: you feel and don't try to fight it or fix it.

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Speaker 3: And some memory came up. I wasn't trying. Something came

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Speaker 3: up about that. I must have been got thirteen at

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Speaker 3: the time, and it wasn't anything horrible, but I just

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Speaker 3: felt sorry for her sure, and I just I'm involuntarily

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Speaker 3: put my hand on my heart and I was like,

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Speaker 3: oh wow, poor thing. Yeah, And so like the reparenting

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Speaker 3: of ourselves, right, you know, so when you say, like

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Speaker 3: you can look back at that kid and go, huh,

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Speaker 3: I get it, man, I get why you did that.

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Speaker 3: Like there's such such a good explanation of these different things,

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Speaker 3: and how we haven't forgiven ourselves for certain things.

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Speaker 4: You just try to survive too. You're using what you

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Speaker 4: can growing up. And I think that's why I luckily

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Speaker 4: found comedy and theater and all these other things, because

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Speaker 4: before I was like, why, I feel like I'm intelligent,

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Speaker 4: but I can't do schoolwork or I can't focus and

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Speaker 4: I don't know what the hell this is and da

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Speaker 4: da da da dah. And growing up, I'm like, I

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Speaker 4: guess I'm just dumb. I guess that's just who I am.

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Speaker 3: Ah.

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Speaker 4: So then I would become friends with all these kids

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Speaker 4: because socially I was fine. I was able to I

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Speaker 4: was friends with every group of everyone, right, I just

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Speaker 4: knew everybody. And yeah, it's as I'm an adult and

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Speaker 4: I'm trying to go, let me fix some things, let

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Speaker 4: me like like take a deep dive. It's just kind

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Speaker 4: of interesting to look back at everything and go, oh,

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Speaker 4: that's why, Holy shit, that's why I gravitated towards this

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Speaker 4: and this and this and this and this, and there's

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Speaker 4: something really comforting about that.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's so we forgive ourselves. We feel we could

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Speaker 3: parent that kid who didn't because no fault of our parents.

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Speaker 3: They just didn't know what to do, Like they didn't

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Speaker 3: have the knowledge. They did the best they could. And

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Speaker 3: we always say on this show, like no one wakes

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Speaker 3: up and goes, I'm going to be a bad mom

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Speaker 3: today or I'm going to be a rotten dad. It's like, no,

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Speaker 3: they just didn't know, and so we can give it

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Speaker 3: to ourselves. And the first of that, for you, it

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Speaker 3: sounds like it was finding a shrink. Yeah, So when

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Speaker 3: you think back on it, because I'm always you know,

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Speaker 3: I'm a little too brutal with all I the fuck

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Speaker 3: you know, these people just need to go and and

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Speaker 3: of course it's the privilege that we get to go.

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Speaker 3: There's some people who can't afford it. There's some people

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Speaker 3: who insurance doesn't cover it and they can't just write

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Speaker 3: a check.

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Speaker 4: Yep.

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Speaker 3: So when you would, if you would think about it,

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Speaker 3: what do you think, first of all held you back

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Speaker 3: and what made you go, Yeah, it's time. Was there

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Speaker 3: anything you can pinpoint?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, to be honest, because I'm pretty open with stuff.

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Speaker 4: If I if I'm an idiot, or if I'm like

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Speaker 4: I did it because I was lazy, I'll admit it.

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Speaker 4: There's no of course, like why I'm too I feel

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Speaker 4: like I'm too old for all that crap. But I

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Speaker 4: think it was probably laziness, probably me just not being

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Speaker 4: able to focus on it. I'm sure there was some

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Speaker 4: hidden anxiety about going forth and doing it, because once

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Speaker 4: you're in it, you're like, oh great, this is great.

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Speaker 4: You know, it's like, what the hell was I oddly

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Speaker 4: putting that off? But yeah, it was like last fall,

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Speaker 4: I had a friend that passed away. There's all these things,

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Speaker 4: and I couldn't like dodge and weave as well as

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Speaker 4: I was able to in the past, and you know,

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Speaker 4: I just feel like that the world's kind of been

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Speaker 4: upside down for quite a bit and I couldn't find

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Speaker 4: those moves to dodge and weave and I was just

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Speaker 4: getting hit in the face with everything that would pop up,

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Speaker 4: and I was like, I'm completely overwhelmed at this point.

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Speaker 4: So I needed some kind of some release, some want

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Speaker 4: to talk to. And luckily my wife's like, okay today,

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Speaker 4: I'm we're gonna sit down, We're gonna find you someone

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Speaker 4: because she knows that you know, yeah, I'm all over

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Speaker 4: the place. So yeah, it was amazing. And that was

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Speaker 4: like that first that first session that it was. It

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Speaker 4: was awesome. It literally was like I let it out

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Speaker 4: and I was like, oh shit, I don't know what

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Speaker 4: that well, let's get to work, get going. And then

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Speaker 4: and from then on. Every single session was just a

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Speaker 4: little better and a little better, and my god, it

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Speaker 4: was just comforting. It was like a comfort blanket. I

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Speaker 4: was like, I like just talking to this person. Sure

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Speaker 4: what I'm getting out of this, but I feel better

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Speaker 4: and I'm you know, do.

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Speaker 3: You find she helps lead you to answers within yourself,

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Speaker 3: because obviously a good therapist doesn't tell you what you

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Speaker 3: should do or give you all the answers. Is that

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Speaker 3: the type of therapist that kind of sort of leads

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Speaker 3: you there?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm a very visual learner and she picked that

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Speaker 4: up pretty quick. I'm like, as you know, I have

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Speaker 4: ADHD as you can tell, you know, like I'm all

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Speaker 4: over the place. She's like, I'm well aware. Jesus Christ,

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Speaker 4: I'm well aware. Yeah. But she you know, she kind

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Speaker 4: of breaks things down with like think of it like

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Speaker 4: you have little pieces of you. You have little parts

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Speaker 4: of you, and you have the rage part when you

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Speaker 4: were driving the car, and you have this empathetic part

379
00:17:48,640 --> 00:17:51,560
Speaker 4: in this and similar to the movie, oh gosh, what's

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Speaker 4: the movie inside Out?

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Speaker 3: Yes, yes, she goes that.

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Speaker 4: I guess when they were making that movie, I guess,

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Speaker 4: you know, they had a lot of influence from you know, therapists,

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Speaker 4: and we'll talk about that. And I was like, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 4: that's a great way to look at things. And this

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Speaker 4: is just this part and this part, and there's times

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Speaker 4: where I want to shut them up, and she's like,

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Speaker 4: don't shut them up. These are the parts that got

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Speaker 4: you to where you are right now, and they want

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Speaker 4: to jump in and fight for you and do this

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Speaker 4: and that, and sometimes it's kind of just managing those

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Speaker 4: parts and kind of settling them down. So she would

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Speaker 4: give me some kind of like visual elements to help

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Speaker 4: I like the situation.

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Speaker 3: The idea of visuals and metaphors and things like that,

396
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Speaker 3: because if you do think of yourself as I read

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Speaker 3: what all the Inside Out characters are. But like Celia,

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Speaker 3: our producer of course, is here. Sorry to not introduce

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Speaker 3: you yet, girl, but push your mic button. Did you

400
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Speaker 3: see Inside Out? Do you know this movie? Of course? Okay?

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Speaker 3: So who is the one with the blue hair Jords? Sadness?

402
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Speaker 3: I like sadness, okay, but I always felt like I

403
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Speaker 3: shouldn't be sadness because we're funny, so we shouldn't be sad.

404
00:18:57,040 --> 00:18:58,919
Speaker 3: And then this is like you see this movie and

405
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Speaker 3: it's like, oh, all of them are allowed, you know.

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Speaker 4: What I mean, they're all together, they're all like kind

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Speaker 4: of just yeah.

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Speaker 3: They're coexisting. And there's no such thing as a bad feeling.

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Speaker 3: It's like there aren't. Anger isn't bad, Jealousy isn't bad,

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Speaker 3: Envy isn't bad. It's just when we let that drive

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Speaker 3: the bus, you know. So just even I was coaching

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Speaker 3: somebody the other day and they said, uh ah, jealousy

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Speaker 3: and envy's coming up, and I don't know what to do.

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Speaker 3: I said, feel it, and then if you want to

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Speaker 3: practice to maybe how to work on that, that'd be

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00:19:27,560 --> 00:19:29,960
Speaker 3: great if you're open to that. Would you be willing

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Speaker 3: to do that? Yes, But it's not like the feeling's bad.

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Speaker 3: We're all human if we don't have and you as

419
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Speaker 3: an actor too, because you're a legit actor like you

420
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Speaker 3: would you are shut up. But no, like you would

421
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Speaker 3: have to use all these different emotions. I would say

422
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Speaker 3: you're a pretty shallow actor if you can only do

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00:19:48,920 --> 00:19:54,040
Speaker 3: well funny. It's literally like all I do that is

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00:19:55,359 --> 00:19:57,760
Speaker 3: that's not true. Because I saw you on Broadway in

425
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Speaker 3: Book of Mormon. I've seen Book of More four times,

426
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Speaker 3: two with the good cast, and then twice with yours

427
00:20:04,320 --> 00:20:07,959
Speaker 3: and no. Seriously, though, the Josh Gad part is what

428
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Speaker 3: you did.

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Speaker 4: What's the name of the bar Arnold Arnold Cunningham.

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Speaker 3: Yes, Arnold Cunningham, and I even to play a part

431
00:20:15,960 --> 00:20:20,199
Speaker 3: that's mostly comedic. There is the humanity in there, there's

432
00:20:20,359 --> 00:20:24,040
Speaker 3: all the just the same. It has every feeling.

433
00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:28,080
Speaker 4: Is like you could be over the top and crazy

434
00:20:28,119 --> 00:20:30,080
Speaker 4: and there's like crazy songs in it that you know.

435
00:20:30,119 --> 00:20:33,399
Speaker 4: It's like if you got in the all these crazy

436
00:20:33,440 --> 00:20:36,240
Speaker 4: shows that the crowd they are like shocked by. But

437
00:20:36,280 --> 00:20:39,000
Speaker 4: there's heart at the center of the show. Yes, and

438
00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:42,080
Speaker 4: you can't That allows you to go as crazy as

439
00:20:42,119 --> 00:20:43,720
Speaker 4: you want to go if you can bring it back

440
00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:45,840
Speaker 4: to the heart of the show. There's a reason why

441
00:20:45,880 --> 00:20:47,879
Speaker 4: that shows so successful. And I think people are like,

442
00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:51,080
Speaker 4: oh my god, this is really crazy South Park insane humor.

443
00:20:51,640 --> 00:20:54,080
Speaker 4: And I think what people are mostly surprised about is

444
00:20:54,119 --> 00:20:55,520
Speaker 4: like that was really sweet.

445
00:20:56,680 --> 00:20:58,639
Speaker 3: There's not a time I've seen it that I haven't cried.

446
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:01,840
Speaker 3: There's it's always had a different part A lot of

447
00:21:01,840 --> 00:21:04,200
Speaker 3: the times. That's that I believe is yeah, and I'm

448
00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:06,520
Speaker 3: not even religious, right, and I'm just like, oh my god,

449
00:21:06,560 --> 00:21:09,359
Speaker 3: this guy feels this so well, so you can't play

450
00:21:09,359 --> 00:21:12,520
Speaker 3: a comedic part. It's a difference between no shade but

451
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:15,479
Speaker 3: lots of shade. It's a different between community theater production

452
00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:19,360
Speaker 3: and book Mormon and a Broadway one. Sure, because it's like, no,

453
00:21:19,480 --> 00:21:23,000
Speaker 3: you get that. There is gravitas, there is the heaviness

454
00:21:23,040 --> 00:21:27,000
Speaker 3: to every one of those characters. Yeah, So for you

455
00:21:27,040 --> 00:21:30,560
Speaker 3: to embrace all that in therapy too, yeah, I imagine

456
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:32,400
Speaker 3: it's just gonna help acting.

457
00:21:32,600 --> 00:21:35,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, it breaks you can break down characters and stuff.

458
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:37,879
Speaker 4: Like the character that I played was this over the top, loud,

459
00:21:38,119 --> 00:21:40,520
Speaker 4: kind of dorky guy who didn't have any friends. Right, Well,

460
00:21:40,560 --> 00:21:42,399
Speaker 4: there's a lot of sadness in that part. So the

461
00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:45,280
Speaker 4: way I took the role was like, you know, I

462
00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:47,639
Speaker 4: played it a little more like empathetic and kind of

463
00:21:47,680 --> 00:21:50,640
Speaker 4: like meek and like, hey, you'd like me as opposed

464
00:21:50,640 --> 00:21:54,399
Speaker 4: to like being too obnoxious. Yeah, because yeah, I mean

465
00:21:54,440 --> 00:21:56,200
Speaker 4: it was like a really sad part. But of course

466
00:21:56,240 --> 00:22:01,160
Speaker 4: it's you know, so I played that that angle and

467
00:22:01,760 --> 00:22:04,720
Speaker 4: it was amazing and it allowed you to do whatever

468
00:22:04,760 --> 00:22:06,439
Speaker 4: you wanted. I was able to be really crazy, but

469
00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:08,239
Speaker 4: like I'd always bring it back to that like the

470
00:22:08,240 --> 00:22:09,240
Speaker 4: heart of that character.

471
00:22:09,320 --> 00:22:13,040
Speaker 3: But I also wonder too, like post therapy and put

472
00:22:13,080 --> 00:22:16,439
Speaker 3: me awhile, as is this therapy journey for you? I

473
00:22:16,560 --> 00:22:19,880
Speaker 3: wonder if there would be little differences in that part.

474
00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:23,359
Speaker 4: Now it's yeah, probably, I mean it's it's just coming

475
00:22:23,400 --> 00:22:24,840
Speaker 4: at it from a different angle. I think that's why

476
00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:26,960
Speaker 4: I do comedy though, too. It was like that was

477
00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:29,679
Speaker 4: kind of my therapy. I was able to if I

478
00:22:29,720 --> 00:22:31,639
Speaker 4: were if I was able to make someone laugh, that

479
00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:34,000
Speaker 4: would make me feel good about myself. I go, ah,

480
00:22:34,040 --> 00:22:35,680
Speaker 4: I made someone feel good, and I would kind of

481
00:22:35,720 --> 00:22:38,639
Speaker 4: live for other people's happiness. I would kind of someone

482
00:22:38,680 --> 00:22:40,199
Speaker 4: was upset, I go, hey, let me tap dancer. You

483
00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:41,760
Speaker 4: what can I do? I'm gonna I'm gonna fall into

484
00:22:41,760 --> 00:22:43,679
Speaker 4: the you know, table and all that scrap. And I

485
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:46,399
Speaker 4: feel like I've always had that instinct growing up, And

486
00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:49,199
Speaker 4: there's something really interesting about like why is that? Like

487
00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:51,720
Speaker 4: why is why do I need that I have that

488
00:22:51,840 --> 00:22:54,360
Speaker 4: urge to like fix a problem, you know? And why

489
00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:56,200
Speaker 4: do my anxiety go to the roof if I can't

490
00:22:56,200 --> 00:23:00,600
Speaker 4: make everyone happy? Yea, yes, right, yeah, of course one's

491
00:23:00,600 --> 00:23:02,760
Speaker 4: happy if.

492
00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:05,800
Speaker 3: You can control Like everything is just about controlling something. Yeah,

493
00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:09,240
Speaker 3: So okay, so I've done everything checked it off the list,

494
00:23:09,440 --> 00:23:09,679
Speaker 3: you know.

495
00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:10,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, so do you.

496
00:23:10,720 --> 00:23:14,639
Speaker 3: Find with the therapy now you've been able to lighten

497
00:23:14,760 --> 00:23:15,520
Speaker 3: up a little on that.

498
00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:18,399
Speaker 4: I try. I definitely take a breath. I try my

499
00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:20,520
Speaker 4: best because there's this of course, I'm in traffic.

500
00:23:20,520 --> 00:23:22,840
Speaker 3: I'm like, I don't do die die, you know, freak.

501
00:23:22,640 --> 00:23:26,560
Speaker 4: Out and then I kind of like reset. But approaching things,

502
00:23:26,640 --> 00:23:28,600
Speaker 4: especially being a dad, now I go, Okay, I see

503
00:23:28,640 --> 00:23:33,159
Speaker 4: my daughter in this situation here, don't be don't react

504
00:23:33,160 --> 00:23:35,160
Speaker 4: like how I would react to certain things. And she's

505
00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:37,480
Speaker 4: got to learn herself and this and that. So I

506
00:23:37,520 --> 00:23:39,520
Speaker 4: try to give her the tools that I wish I

507
00:23:39,680 --> 00:23:42,520
Speaker 4: had growing up in terms of like figuring things out,

508
00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:46,440
Speaker 4: especially if she's you know, going down the same paths

509
00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:48,240
Speaker 4: as I was, you know, if it was eight D

510
00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:52,200
Speaker 4: or whatever it may be. I try to come from

511
00:23:52,600 --> 00:23:55,119
Speaker 4: a little more like a logical place. I come from

512
00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:58,399
Speaker 4: it a little more uh, a little more educated, a

513
00:23:58,400 --> 00:24:02,000
Speaker 4: little more patience or things. And yeah, I feel like

514
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:04,679
Speaker 4: I breathe a little more going into that because I

515
00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:07,119
Speaker 4: try to look at every angle. That's just one of

516
00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:09,040
Speaker 4: the things that I'm able to do. Like if I

517
00:24:09,119 --> 00:24:11,520
Speaker 4: was gonna have a tough conversation I go, well, if

518
00:24:11,520 --> 00:24:12,960
Speaker 4: I say this, they're probably to come back with that,

519
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:14,760
Speaker 4: and then I'll have three options for what they say,

520
00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:16,400
Speaker 4: and then I'm gonna come back with this and then

521
00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:18,840
Speaker 4: and then I'd work myself up and I'm like, yeah,

522
00:24:18,840 --> 00:24:20,480
Speaker 4: what the fuck what am I talking about?

523
00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:21,159
Speaker 3: The conversation?

524
00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:25,199
Speaker 4: Just do it? And my wife's like, you're you gotta stop.

525
00:24:25,800 --> 00:24:28,080
Speaker 4: Just talk to the person. I would talk to the

526
00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:31,080
Speaker 4: person and it was totally fine, and I'm like, wow,

527
00:24:31,160 --> 00:24:33,120
Speaker 4: that was a lot of fucking effort I just put

528
00:24:33,160 --> 00:24:36,600
Speaker 4: into this whole. I created this whole scenario with like

529
00:24:36,680 --> 00:24:39,120
Speaker 4: exit strategies and like, if they say this, I'm gonna

530
00:24:39,119 --> 00:24:40,480
Speaker 4: come back with this because they did this to me.

531
00:24:40,560 --> 00:24:44,800
Speaker 4: And it's like, what the fuck is going And meanwhile

532
00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:46,720
Speaker 4: the other person has no idea. I'm going through this

533
00:24:47,280 --> 00:24:48,800
Speaker 4: complete you know, melt out in.

534
00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:51,840
Speaker 3: My head and he keeps you with in action you

535
00:24:51,920 --> 00:24:54,240
Speaker 3: don't ever take the action right. And then also it

536
00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:58,000
Speaker 3: just it's just the release of needing to control it. Yeah,

537
00:24:58,080 --> 00:25:01,720
Speaker 3: you know, we have this ongoing saga here at Shrink

538
00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:04,760
Speaker 3: This with Lesa Lampanelli. Send your questions to Drink Shrink

539
00:25:04,880 --> 00:25:08,880
Speaker 3: This show at gmail dot com. With the ongoing saga

540
00:25:08,920 --> 00:25:13,880
Speaker 3: of my funeral plot and headstone and the latest thing

541
00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,480
Speaker 3: it's about control with that, with that whole like, oh

542
00:25:16,800 --> 00:25:19,439
Speaker 3: if I say this, she's gonna say this. Well, I

543
00:25:19,520 --> 00:25:23,560
Speaker 3: bought this headstone, as the audience knows, had it installed.

544
00:25:24,240 --> 00:25:26,760
Speaker 3: I had a lot of shame around it because it's gorgeous.

545
00:25:26,800 --> 00:25:28,240
Speaker 3: It's like a piece of art. I didn't know how

546
00:25:28,240 --> 00:25:31,480
Speaker 3: big it was, and it looks monstrously big compared to

547
00:25:31,760 --> 00:25:33,800
Speaker 3: the rest of my families. So I was afraid of it.

548
00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:36,080
Speaker 3: Think I was a big shot. I worked through it.

549
00:25:36,800 --> 00:25:41,640
Speaker 3: But the ongoing saga part is that the cemetery guy

550
00:25:42,480 --> 00:25:45,560
Speaker 3: put the foundation in the wrong place. So my mother

551
00:25:45,680 --> 00:25:48,000
Speaker 3: had bought us funeral plots or what do they call

552
00:25:48,040 --> 00:25:52,480
Speaker 3: cemetery platz it really was, that's so Italian, and so

553
00:25:52,840 --> 00:25:55,600
Speaker 3: he put it where my sisters is. So I was like,

554
00:25:56,600 --> 00:25:58,399
Speaker 3: how am I going to get that money back? Like

555
00:25:58,440 --> 00:26:00,399
Speaker 3: that's eight hundred and forty six dollars and I'm not

556
00:26:00,520 --> 00:26:02,960
Speaker 3: cheap and I'm not poor, but I don't like spending

557
00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:05,800
Speaker 3: money if I don't make the mistake. So I had

558
00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:07,560
Speaker 3: this idea. I was like, I'm going to go into

559
00:26:07,560 --> 00:26:10,440
Speaker 3: the funeral director who I'm friends with, I'm going to

560
00:26:11,560 --> 00:26:13,359
Speaker 3: know I am. Actually I went to high school with

561
00:26:13,359 --> 00:26:17,679
Speaker 3: her director, Holly Mullins. She's fantastic, so we I go,

562
00:26:17,800 --> 00:26:21,560
Speaker 3: I'm gonna go and tell Holly, gosh, it really wasn't

563
00:26:21,600 --> 00:26:27,080
Speaker 3: my fault. So it's unfortunately the funeral Homes responsibility to

564
00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:29,480
Speaker 3: hash this out. So I had in my head, I'm

565
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:32,760
Speaker 3: gonna offer to pay half. I'll take like half. So

566
00:26:32,800 --> 00:26:34,400
Speaker 3: I go in with all these options in my head.

567
00:26:34,440 --> 00:26:36,480
Speaker 3: I have all the emails printed out to prove that

568
00:26:36,560 --> 00:26:41,919
Speaker 3: I was only half wrong. So I yeah, and she's like,

569
00:26:43,680 --> 00:26:46,399
Speaker 3: she's like, oh, it's going we just catch up, and

570
00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:49,680
Speaker 3: I go, oh, listen, you know I value our friendship

571
00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:51,840
Speaker 3: so much, because I really do. We're good friends. We

572
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:55,159
Speaker 3: have dinners together, and I go, and you do so

573
00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:59,520
Speaker 3: much unpaid labor. I said, but I don't think that

574
00:26:59,720 --> 00:27:03,119
Speaker 3: found thing was my fault. And she goes, oh, what

575
00:27:03,160 --> 00:27:05,280
Speaker 3: what happened? Whose fault do you think it is? I go,

576
00:27:05,800 --> 00:27:06,560
Speaker 3: I think it.

577
00:27:06,440 --> 00:27:08,320
Speaker 4: Was like keep shrinking.

578
00:27:08,400 --> 00:27:10,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, both are our fault, I think so and she goes,

579
00:27:10,600 --> 00:27:12,320
Speaker 3: oh God, she goes forget it, We'll pay the whole thing.

580
00:27:12,640 --> 00:27:15,080
Speaker 3: I'm like what, I go, well, we should split it,

581
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:17,560
Speaker 3: and she goes, no, no, no, She goes, it's nothing.

582
00:27:17,760 --> 00:27:20,160
Speaker 3: Your family, Oh, I love your family, are so good

583
00:27:20,160 --> 00:27:21,880
Speaker 3: to us. I go, nobody, you're so good to us.

584
00:27:21,960 --> 00:27:25,679
Speaker 3: And are you sure you will be able to be

585
00:27:25,840 --> 00:27:27,960
Speaker 3: friends with me and not have any resentment about this?

586
00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:29,680
Speaker 3: She goes, I'm gonna call him right now and say

587
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:32,400
Speaker 3: take it off the bill. It's been taking off the bill.

588
00:27:32,560 --> 00:27:36,879
Speaker 3: So in other words, the like old spinning of like

589
00:27:36,920 --> 00:27:39,400
Speaker 3: what if she says this and this, and it could

590
00:27:39,400 --> 00:27:42,600
Speaker 3: have never gone the way that it went away. I

591
00:27:42,600 --> 00:27:45,119
Speaker 3: could have never predicted. It's like, why just get out

592
00:27:45,119 --> 00:27:46,960
Speaker 3: of my own way and just do it and look

593
00:27:46,960 --> 00:27:49,720
Speaker 3: at how beautiful it gets resolved. It's a ten second conversation.

594
00:27:49,960 --> 00:27:50,560
Speaker 3: You have dinner.

595
00:27:50,720 --> 00:27:53,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, I have this. That's one of my biggest things.

596
00:27:53,320 --> 00:27:55,040
Speaker 4: I'm like, they're gonna hate me. I have to make

597
00:27:55,400 --> 00:27:57,639
Speaker 4: like chop my leg off like you were having a

598
00:27:57,640 --> 00:27:59,560
Speaker 4: bad day. It's totally fine. I'm just gonna fix my

599
00:27:59,640 --> 00:28:01,720
Speaker 4: leg here for a second, like I will literally I

600
00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:06,280
Speaker 4: have like the you know, a long fuse. Yeah, I

601
00:28:06,280 --> 00:28:08,720
Speaker 4: always give benefits of the doubt, like to a fault.

602
00:28:08,880 --> 00:28:11,000
Speaker 4: Right by the end of it, I'm just completely like

603
00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:13,480
Speaker 4: I hate everybody. Yeah, and why did I do this

604
00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:15,600
Speaker 4: to myself? And it's hard for me to kind of

605
00:28:15,600 --> 00:28:17,840
Speaker 4: advocate for myself sometimes because I'm like, I want to

606
00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:20,200
Speaker 4: keep the peace, and if there's peace in the room,

607
00:28:20,760 --> 00:28:23,040
Speaker 4: I feel safe and everyone's happy and everyone's smiling, and

608
00:28:23,119 --> 00:28:25,920
Speaker 4: I know I can shove it down and everything's fun.

609
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:28,480
Speaker 3: Do you think you're a little less keep the peace

610
00:28:28,520 --> 00:28:30,200
Speaker 3: guy now that you're working on yourself.

611
00:28:30,280 --> 00:28:33,000
Speaker 4: I'm trying. Yeah, I'm trying to be like it's it's

612
00:28:33,040 --> 00:28:34,800
Speaker 4: just one of those things that I've always had where

613
00:28:34,800 --> 00:28:38,320
Speaker 4: I'm like, you know, just advocating for myself for certain things.

614
00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:40,680
Speaker 4: I'm like there's certain things where I'm like, no, I

615
00:28:40,680 --> 00:28:42,560
Speaker 4: will fight to the death for this right. There's other

616
00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:45,160
Speaker 4: things where I'm like it's not worth the time and effort,

617
00:28:45,160 --> 00:28:47,360
Speaker 4: and you do that enough, you kind of get buried

618
00:28:47,360 --> 00:28:47,560
Speaker 4: in it.

619
00:28:47,760 --> 00:28:51,120
Speaker 3: Well, I kind of feel like we're gonna be friends

620
00:28:51,280 --> 00:28:56,240
Speaker 3: because you push back on something with me last year,

621
00:28:56,240 --> 00:28:58,480
Speaker 3: and I think that's a really good sign of like

622
00:28:58,520 --> 00:29:00,440
Speaker 3: when you trust someone and you can actually say what

623
00:29:00,480 --> 00:29:03,040
Speaker 3: you need. Because the school that asked us to host

624
00:29:03,040 --> 00:29:06,680
Speaker 3: their gala so funny, okay, and I was like, oh

625
00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:11,120
Speaker 3: my god, we gotta do a spoof of there's a

626
00:29:11,160 --> 00:29:13,760
Speaker 3: song two by two where they're all going on their missions.

627
00:29:14,080 --> 00:29:15,640
Speaker 3: So I go, two of the kids could be going

628
00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:17,480
Speaker 3: to Juilliard and two of the kids could be going

629
00:29:17,520 --> 00:29:20,080
Speaker 3: to like, you know, Yale, and it's like we get

630
00:29:20,120 --> 00:29:23,640
Speaker 3: stuck going to nor Walk. So we were laughing it up.

631
00:29:23,680 --> 00:29:26,360
Speaker 3: It's funny, and like two weeks later you're like, yeah,

632
00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:28,760
Speaker 3: you know, I really don't want to do that. I

633
00:29:28,760 --> 00:29:31,520
Speaker 3: have some complicated feelings about the show. I don't want

634
00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:35,240
Speaker 3: to revisit my past. And I was honestly so honored

635
00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:40,280
Speaker 3: when people tell me the truth like that, because I'm formidable,

636
00:29:40,320 --> 00:29:42,560
Speaker 3: I'm tough to approach, I'm tough to say you hurt

637
00:29:42,560 --> 00:29:45,600
Speaker 3: my feelings whatever it is. And I was like, oh, yeah,

638
00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:47,600
Speaker 3: no problem. And then we found a really other funny

639
00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:50,479
Speaker 3: thing to do. Yeah, and I was like, wow, that's

640
00:29:50,600 --> 00:29:56,160
Speaker 3: ballsy and cooling, that's inane. I felt so flat.

641
00:29:56,200 --> 00:29:59,440
Speaker 4: That's another instance of like, oh fuck I because my

642
00:29:59,640 --> 00:30:02,600
Speaker 4: thing is knee jerk, like, yes, yep, we'll do it, yep, chuir, absolutely,

643
00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:05,000
Speaker 4: you're happy, great, no problem. And then I turn around

644
00:30:05,040 --> 00:30:07,240
Speaker 4: and go, what the fuck did I say that for?

645
00:30:07,640 --> 00:30:07,760
Speaker 5: Right?

646
00:30:07,920 --> 00:30:10,720
Speaker 4: And then I spend the next month stressing it out

647
00:30:10,760 --> 00:30:12,440
Speaker 4: and how do I figure this out? And it was

648
00:30:12,480 --> 00:30:14,520
Speaker 4: just one of those things where I'm like, I think

649
00:30:14,560 --> 00:30:17,880
Speaker 4: after the show, which was the best greatest thing ever

650
00:30:17,920 --> 00:30:19,840
Speaker 4: in the world. Everyone was so great. I loved it.

651
00:30:20,040 --> 00:30:23,560
Speaker 4: I have no negative feelings towards it whatsoever. But I

652
00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:26,280
Speaker 4: think after that was kind of like I was kind

653
00:30:26,280 --> 00:30:27,960
Speaker 4: of like, oh, you're the Book of Mormon guy in

654
00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:30,360
Speaker 4: my hometown stuff, and I was like, yeah, well, what

655
00:30:30,400 --> 00:30:31,920
Speaker 4: are you doing now? And I felt like there was

656
00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:34,160
Speaker 4: like this like bar that I had to set for

657
00:30:34,240 --> 00:30:36,920
Speaker 4: myself and I was like, oh, I have to constantly

658
00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:39,800
Speaker 4: impress people now, and it turned into that I was exhausted,

659
00:30:39,840 --> 00:30:40,240
Speaker 4: and I was.

660
00:30:40,160 --> 00:30:40,880
Speaker 2: Like I do that.

661
00:30:49,680 --> 00:30:51,600
Speaker 4: So with that, I was like I just kind of

662
00:30:52,240 --> 00:30:55,280
Speaker 4: I just want to steer clear of that a little more.

663
00:30:55,520 --> 00:30:57,400
Speaker 4: There was like I was hosting everything.

664
00:30:58,600 --> 00:31:01,320
Speaker 3: You really did, Damn that's so well, Like I would

665
00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:03,720
Speaker 3: have never thought you were stressed out over that. Really

666
00:31:04,120 --> 00:31:06,560
Speaker 3: of the ask because I was like, yeah, okay, sure,

667
00:31:06,640 --> 00:31:06,920
Speaker 3: I was.

668
00:31:06,840 --> 00:31:08,800
Speaker 4: Like is this okay? I'm so sorry, Like I because

669
00:31:08,800 --> 00:31:10,720
Speaker 4: I do feel I genuinely feel bad because I'm like

670
00:31:10,800 --> 00:31:13,440
Speaker 4: I said, yes, I'm an asshole. Now I'm like changing things.

671
00:31:13,320 --> 00:31:15,120
Speaker 3: Up, changing one's mind is allowed.

672
00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:17,280
Speaker 4: And my wife Jen was just like, just just talk.

673
00:31:17,680 --> 00:31:20,720
Speaker 3: Oh my god, this went to the jury.

674
00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:23,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, I go, shit, I go, is it bad? I

675
00:31:23,120 --> 00:31:25,320
Speaker 4: try to talk myself into things. Oh no, And then

676
00:31:25,320 --> 00:31:27,280
Speaker 4: I'll do it out loud so people can go, what

677
00:31:27,320 --> 00:31:29,600
Speaker 4: the fuck, why are you doing that? Just stand up

678
00:31:29,600 --> 00:31:31,960
Speaker 4: for yourself or just say what you feel. Be open.

679
00:31:32,400 --> 00:31:35,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, I change my mind, and I'm just like, yeah,

680
00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:37,840
Speaker 3: I know, I said yes. Of Glenn and Doyle always says,

681
00:31:39,920 --> 00:31:44,600
Speaker 3: don't say yes to anything that you won't want to

682
00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:46,880
Speaker 3: do six months from now, meaning because the thing comes

683
00:31:46,960 --> 00:31:48,800
Speaker 3: up six months later and you kind of resent it.

684
00:31:48,840 --> 00:31:52,040
Speaker 3: You have spent six months dreading it, so taking the

685
00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:54,880
Speaker 3: time to really not do an immediate yes and smart which,

686
00:31:54,920 --> 00:31:57,440
Speaker 3: by the way, we still got tricked into something else

687
00:31:57,480 --> 00:32:00,560
Speaker 3: we got to do this year. Yeah, but it's great

688
00:32:00,600 --> 00:32:03,280
Speaker 3: about it. Okay, So what happened, Celia. You don't know this,

689
00:32:03,320 --> 00:32:07,280
Speaker 3: but I'm a great actress. So we are in were

690
00:32:07,360 --> 00:32:10,720
Speaker 3: teaching at this school and they do three major productions

691
00:32:10,760 --> 00:32:14,440
Speaker 3: of year musicals. So they need four adults in the

692
00:32:14,440 --> 00:32:18,080
Speaker 3: show because they're doing Footloose and you need the reverend,

693
00:32:18,240 --> 00:32:21,240
Speaker 3: the aunt, the uncle, and the mom. So they think

694
00:32:21,240 --> 00:32:23,720
Speaker 3: it's a great idea. Have the two comedy teachers play

695
00:32:23,720 --> 00:32:26,800
Speaker 3: the aunt and the uncle, right, yea. I am immediately

696
00:32:26,840 --> 00:32:28,760
Speaker 3: flattered because I get to wear a costume and I

697
00:32:28,760 --> 00:32:30,880
Speaker 3: lost forty pounds, so I'm going to look a relequite.

698
00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:33,280
Speaker 3: I get to wear a wig, and so they ask us.

699
00:32:33,280 --> 00:32:37,360
Speaker 3: So we're like sure, and you know what, I'm not sad.

700
00:32:37,400 --> 00:32:39,880
Speaker 3: I took that. I was sad when I are a

701
00:32:39,880 --> 00:32:42,200
Speaker 3: little annoyed when I saw the rehearsal schedule because I'm like,

702
00:32:42,480 --> 00:32:44,640
Speaker 3: literally went through the script. I have four lines.

703
00:32:44,840 --> 00:32:45,680
Speaker 4: I haven't looked.

704
00:32:45,840 --> 00:32:47,880
Speaker 3: No, dude, you have one I think one or two lines.

705
00:32:47,960 --> 00:32:50,920
Speaker 4: Oh great, I think you know this is also part

706
00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:53,840
Speaker 4: of my problem. I don't I just go, eh, push

707
00:32:53,880 --> 00:32:56,040
Speaker 4: it down the line, and then it's like, oh, it's tomorrow,

708
00:32:56,040 --> 00:32:58,120
Speaker 4: and I go, I should look at what I have.

709
00:32:58,360 --> 00:33:01,000
Speaker 3: Well, oh, you are a pro, so you are gonna

710
00:33:01,080 --> 00:33:03,680
Speaker 3: laugh at how tiny our parts are, which I think

711
00:33:03,720 --> 00:33:05,200
Speaker 3: is great. I think we have to show up maybe

712
00:33:05,240 --> 00:33:08,640
Speaker 3: like three times for attack or whatever. But I'm glad

713
00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:10,680
Speaker 3: we said yes to that. At least I'm glad I

714
00:33:10,720 --> 00:33:13,960
Speaker 3: said yes, sir. I think you have to slap him,

715
00:33:14,360 --> 00:33:19,200
Speaker 3: which is really somebody slaps Wren, who's the lead character.

716
00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:22,360
Speaker 3: If somebody slaps him, I gasp, which is a line

717
00:33:22,520 --> 00:33:26,400
Speaker 3: I can memorize that do I just say?

718
00:33:26,480 --> 00:33:26,840
Speaker 4: Gasp?

719
00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:29,400
Speaker 3: Is that a thing I did? What would you give

720
00:33:29,480 --> 00:33:33,400
Speaker 3: therapy two thumbs up? Would you give it one thumb

721
00:33:33,440 --> 00:33:35,800
Speaker 3: in the ass and one in the other part and

722
00:33:35,840 --> 00:33:39,560
Speaker 3: this in the other thing? What would you say to

723
00:33:39,720 --> 00:33:42,400
Speaker 3: anyone who is thinking about therapy?

724
00:33:42,520 --> 00:33:45,480
Speaker 4: I say ten out of ten, all the thumbs up,

725
00:33:45,560 --> 00:33:48,520
Speaker 4: because it's like work on yourself. You only have one life.

726
00:33:48,640 --> 00:33:51,320
Speaker 4: And if it helps you, like when people exercise, or

727
00:33:52,000 --> 00:33:53,800
Speaker 4: if it makes you feel better, who gives a shit

728
00:33:53,960 --> 00:33:54,239
Speaker 4: do it?

729
00:33:54,480 --> 00:33:55,400
Speaker 3: Yeah?

730
00:33:55,560 --> 00:33:59,520
Speaker 4: I'm a yeah, two thumbs up. Yeah, someone else's thumb

731
00:33:59,600 --> 00:34:01,080
Speaker 4: up the button if that?

732
00:34:01,320 --> 00:34:04,320
Speaker 3: But thumbs are good. Celia, you've been in therapy for

733
00:34:04,360 --> 00:34:07,560
Speaker 3: how long? Since you were like three? Six? Since I

734
00:34:07,600 --> 00:34:12,160
Speaker 3: was twelve, twelve? Okay, and you're what twenty three. That's

735
00:34:12,200 --> 00:34:17,719
Speaker 3: a lot of years. It's for very little progress.

736
00:34:18,080 --> 00:34:22,600
Speaker 5: I said that to my therapist Monday. I was like,

737
00:34:22,640 --> 00:34:24,880
Speaker 5: to be honest with you, I'm a little bit shocked

738
00:34:24,920 --> 00:34:26,960
Speaker 5: that I've been in therapy since I was twelve and

739
00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:29,799
Speaker 5: I'm still having problems like these, Like I'm still seeing.

740
00:34:29,920 --> 00:34:31,640
Speaker 4: She was like, to be honest, I'm still surprised you

741
00:34:31,640 --> 00:34:36,920
Speaker 4: think I'm a therapist.

742
00:34:36,040 --> 00:34:39,399
Speaker 3: Everything for a new screenplay, exactly, take your finger out

743
00:34:39,440 --> 00:34:42,920
Speaker 3: of me. But Celia, wait, you haven't had the same

744
00:34:42,960 --> 00:34:46,080
Speaker 3: shrink since you're twelve. No, that would be insane, because

745
00:34:46,080 --> 00:34:48,160
Speaker 3: they do say, or at least they used to say,

746
00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:50,040
Speaker 3: you should go to the same one for two years

747
00:34:50,040 --> 00:34:52,680
Speaker 3: and then change. Oh really yeah, because it's almost like

748
00:34:52,719 --> 00:34:55,040
Speaker 3: they get too used to them, you become too friendly

749
00:34:55,080 --> 00:34:57,400
Speaker 3: with them. Whatever it is. What did your therapist, by

750
00:34:57,440 --> 00:34:58,480
Speaker 3: the way, say to that though?

751
00:34:58,520 --> 00:35:00,880
Speaker 5: When you said that, she was like, then you're not

752
00:35:01,200 --> 00:35:04,799
Speaker 5: taking the tools that you've been learning and really implementing

753
00:35:04,800 --> 00:35:05,600
Speaker 5: that into your life.

754
00:35:05,880 --> 00:35:08,440
Speaker 3: And do you feel she's right? Yeah? Oh okay, so

755
00:35:08,480 --> 00:35:11,160
Speaker 3: you do take some of the blame. Oh absolutely. Oh no,

756
00:35:11,200 --> 00:35:14,320
Speaker 3: but I love that about you because some people would just, honestly,

757
00:35:14,400 --> 00:35:15,759
Speaker 3: and I'm sure this was being in the past, I'd

758
00:35:15,800 --> 00:35:17,880
Speaker 3: be like, yeah, really, well I have and then just

759
00:35:18,360 --> 00:35:18,839
Speaker 3: ghost her.

760
00:35:18,920 --> 00:35:22,560
Speaker 5: No, I definitely haven't. Like I definitely have have been like, yeah,

761
00:35:22,600 --> 00:35:24,920
Speaker 5: you're right, you're right, and then when I'm in the

762
00:35:24,960 --> 00:35:27,360
Speaker 5: moment and I actually need to use the tools that

763
00:35:27,400 --> 00:35:29,840
Speaker 5: she's given me, and I've agreed with her on.

764
00:35:29,920 --> 00:35:35,759
Speaker 3: Yeah out the window. Yeah gone, you mean the oh

765
00:35:35,840 --> 00:35:36,399
Speaker 3: they just leave.

766
00:35:36,520 --> 00:35:39,200
Speaker 4: Yeah, these are great tools. I'm just gonna set them

767
00:35:39,239 --> 00:35:39,880
Speaker 4: right over here.

768
00:35:40,080 --> 00:35:45,000
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, But you do kind of know she's right

769
00:35:45,280 --> 00:35:46,719
Speaker 3: and those tools are good.

770
00:35:46,640 --> 00:35:47,480
Speaker 5: And I love her.

771
00:35:47,680 --> 00:35:51,160
Speaker 3: What is it about what makes you put them aside?

772
00:35:51,360 --> 00:35:53,160
Speaker 3: If you were to just rationally look at it, it's

773
00:35:53,200 --> 00:35:56,280
Speaker 3: just like, I'm afraid to use them because.

774
00:35:56,239 --> 00:35:57,560
Speaker 5: No, I'm just an angry person.

775
00:35:57,840 --> 00:36:01,160
Speaker 3: Mm hmmm. So maybe the anger is the first thing

776
00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:04,239
Speaker 3: you got to look at, yeah, because that's that's disguising

777
00:36:04,320 --> 00:36:07,680
Speaker 3: everything else, because I had a dismantled rage and anger first,

778
00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:10,560
Speaker 3: because you don't get to that soft stuff till then.

779
00:36:10,760 --> 00:36:13,320
Speaker 5: Well, it's definitely improved. I used to be a lot worse,

780
00:36:13,920 --> 00:36:18,759
Speaker 5: like really bad, Like I have improved immensely in the

781
00:36:18,760 --> 00:36:20,880
Speaker 5: past like two years, I'd.

782
00:36:20,640 --> 00:36:24,800
Speaker 3: Say, So, I think we need a second Fixing Celia

783
00:36:24,840 --> 00:36:28,719
Speaker 3: episode and we'll get through your anger because Nick will

784
00:36:28,719 --> 00:36:30,600
Speaker 3: come in and beat the shit out of you with

785
00:36:30,640 --> 00:36:31,360
Speaker 3: his tits.

786
00:36:31,719 --> 00:36:33,640
Speaker 5: Well, he guess because he gets angry too.

787
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:37,040
Speaker 3: Yeah. Well, I am an angry human, so I get it.

788
00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:40,279
Speaker 3: And it's like, but I think it's just covering a

789
00:36:40,320 --> 00:36:42,360
Speaker 3: lot of times it's just covering so for sure.

790
00:36:42,440 --> 00:36:44,439
Speaker 5: And that's the worst part is that I'm a very

791
00:36:44,480 --> 00:36:46,720
Speaker 5: aware person, but like sometimes I just don't do anything

792
00:36:46,719 --> 00:36:48,919
Speaker 5: about it. I was like, oh, yeah, that's there, but.

793
00:36:48,880 --> 00:36:52,799
Speaker 3: Like, okay, let me just yeah like for later. Yeah, no,

794
00:36:52,880 --> 00:36:55,000
Speaker 3: I get that. I feel the same way about like

795
00:36:55,520 --> 00:36:59,400
Speaker 3: how I am so into romantic movies and I'm so

796
00:36:59,719 --> 00:37:01,840
Speaker 3: like sometimes I'll be on TikTok and they'll be like

797
00:37:01,880 --> 00:37:05,640
Speaker 3: a cute little compilation of eighties romantic movies to Nothing's

798
00:37:05,680 --> 00:37:08,839
Speaker 3: gonna stop Us Now, or something really corny, but I'm

799
00:37:08,880 --> 00:37:11,880
Speaker 3: like crying and going, oh my god, that's so romantic.

800
00:37:11,880 --> 00:37:13,919
Speaker 3: And I loved love and I love love and it's great.

801
00:37:14,280 --> 00:37:16,759
Speaker 3: I'm not willing to look at that. I am not

802
00:37:16,880 --> 00:37:19,960
Speaker 3: fucking gonna date. I'm not fucking opening myself up to

803
00:37:20,000 --> 00:37:21,960
Speaker 3: that shit. So I think we all do it. It's

804
00:37:21,960 --> 00:37:24,799
Speaker 3: just in different areas of life. The difference is it's

805
00:37:24,840 --> 00:37:27,719
Speaker 3: not hurting me at all never to date, because it's

806
00:37:27,760 --> 00:37:29,680
Speaker 3: just like it would probably hurt to date again. You

807
00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:32,480
Speaker 3: get your heart broken again, you get a uti, you

808
00:37:32,520 --> 00:37:35,399
Speaker 3: get a yeast infection, guy punches you in the clit.

809
00:37:35,719 --> 00:37:38,440
Speaker 3: You never know what will happen, So you'll know when

810
00:37:38,480 --> 00:37:41,560
Speaker 3: you're ready. I'll know when I'm ready, if ever, Chris,

811
00:37:41,719 --> 00:37:44,480
Speaker 3: you're just iconically ready already.

812
00:37:43,960 --> 00:37:47,600
Speaker 4: I'm so happy. I'll tell you the fact of my

813
00:37:47,640 --> 00:37:49,879
Speaker 4: wife's still with me. I'm so I'm blown away. It's

814
00:37:49,920 --> 00:37:52,400
Speaker 4: so great. Wow, it's just it's just it's awesome. We

815
00:37:52,440 --> 00:37:54,600
Speaker 4: have a really great relationship and we been together forever.

816
00:37:54,680 --> 00:37:58,640
Speaker 4: But she definitely knows how to, you know, put up

817
00:37:58,680 --> 00:37:59,520
Speaker 4: with up with me.

818
00:37:59,680 --> 00:38:02,280
Speaker 3: Well s, she's probably easy going.

819
00:38:02,600 --> 00:38:03,920
Speaker 4: She's awesome. Yeah, she's definitely.

820
00:38:04,680 --> 00:38:06,520
Speaker 3: Can you imagine. I said to somebody the other day,

821
00:38:06,560 --> 00:38:08,560
Speaker 3: I said, I was having dinner with this couple and

822
00:38:08,600 --> 00:38:12,480
Speaker 3: he's like twenty five, and go, Alex, I go, do

823
00:38:12,560 --> 00:38:15,040
Speaker 3: you get told you're easy going? He goes yeah, and

824
00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:16,920
Speaker 3: his girlfriend goes, oh my god. He's so easy going.

825
00:38:17,160 --> 00:38:21,160
Speaker 3: He gets mad very rarely, but he's very like protective too.

826
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:25,640
Speaker 3: And I'm like, what must that be like to just

827
00:38:26,280 --> 00:38:31,480
Speaker 3: dancing through life? Say you do do? It's a fucking

828
00:38:32,160 --> 00:38:33,680
Speaker 3: I We are not easy going.

829
00:38:33,719 --> 00:38:35,640
Speaker 4: My wife's in a meeting this morning, and she I

830
00:38:35,640 --> 00:38:38,759
Speaker 4: mean like a bit. She's like a smart cookie. She's

831
00:38:38,920 --> 00:38:41,319
Speaker 4: smart and she's putting all these things together and talking

832
00:38:41,360 --> 00:38:43,600
Speaker 4: all these executives and I come in the live room.

833
00:38:43,600 --> 00:38:45,839
Speaker 4: This is this morning. I go, I can't get phil

834
00:38:45,880 --> 00:38:49,600
Speaker 4: Collins out of my fucking head. And she's like, okay, and.

835
00:38:50,320 --> 00:38:52,120
Speaker 3: That's work, makes her million dollar day.

836
00:38:52,400 --> 00:38:55,920
Speaker 4: Used to THEE and this is why I'm not in

837
00:38:55,960 --> 00:38:58,239
Speaker 4: a relationship because I had some fucking asshole come in

838
00:38:58,480 --> 00:39:01,000
Speaker 4: and start singing coming in the air tonight. To me,

839
00:39:01,160 --> 00:39:04,960
Speaker 4: it wasn't even what was it. It was something queer,

840
00:39:05,320 --> 00:39:06,480
Speaker 4: it was something it wasn't.

841
00:39:06,600 --> 00:39:10,920
Speaker 3: It wasn't my god, if it was easy lover with

842
00:39:11,000 --> 00:39:12,280
Speaker 3: Philip Bailey.

843
00:39:12,160 --> 00:39:13,480
Speaker 4: Oh was it?

844
00:39:13,640 --> 00:39:13,759
Speaker 5: Well?

845
00:39:13,800 --> 00:39:14,360
Speaker 4: How does that go?

846
00:39:14,520 --> 00:39:18,360
Speaker 3: I don't know, geez, did you take.

847
00:39:20,000 --> 00:39:20,360
Speaker 5: It was?

848
00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:22,759
Speaker 4: I don't know where it came from. We dropped our

849
00:39:22,840 --> 00:39:24,279
Speaker 4: kids off from school, and then I get in the

850
00:39:24,320 --> 00:39:26,040
Speaker 4: house and Philip Collins like, hey, I'm gonna sing in

851
00:39:26,040 --> 00:39:27,719
Speaker 4: your head for a fucking hour. I'm like, all right,

852
00:39:27,840 --> 00:39:28,200
Speaker 4: can I.

853
00:39:28,200 --> 00:39:33,440
Speaker 3: Just suggest more therapy right there? Tell your life? All right,

854
00:39:33,920 --> 00:39:36,320
Speaker 3: We're gonna take some letters once again. This is shrink

855
00:39:36,360 --> 00:39:41,839
Speaker 3: This will with my special guest Chris O'Neill. You don't

856
00:39:41,840 --> 00:39:43,759
Speaker 3: even have to know how to spell that last name

857
00:39:43,920 --> 00:39:46,440
Speaker 3: because just follow him at what is it.

858
00:39:46,400 --> 00:39:47,320
Speaker 4: Chris o Show?

859
00:39:47,760 --> 00:39:50,040
Speaker 3: Like literally, oh, Chris c.

860
00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:50,840
Speaker 2: H R.

861
00:39:50,960 --> 00:39:54,760
Speaker 4: I s O show where I don't know.

862
00:39:56,680 --> 00:40:00,560
Speaker 3: Talk all the places. He's actually very funny. Yeah, I

863
00:40:00,640 --> 00:40:03,440
Speaker 3: know you are, because I'll watch your little sketches. I

864
00:40:03,480 --> 00:40:07,319
Speaker 3: watch your little skits, and I say, she's funny. I

865
00:40:07,360 --> 00:40:09,600
Speaker 3: call everyone girl, by the way, I've told my class,

866
00:40:09,600 --> 00:40:12,960
Speaker 3: because everybody at school and everywhere now is very politically correct.

867
00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:16,520
Speaker 3: But I say, don't listen. I call everyone girl, and

868
00:40:16,560 --> 00:40:20,279
Speaker 3: I call everyone she. So y'all, fucking shut the fuck up.

869
00:40:20,680 --> 00:40:22,240
Speaker 3: I'm misgendering everyone.

870
00:40:22,400 --> 00:40:23,879
Speaker 4: Here's a show in there for you.

871
00:40:23,960 --> 00:40:26,920
Speaker 3: I swear to God me just being the teacher of

872
00:40:26,960 --> 00:40:27,400
Speaker 3: the Wokes.

873
00:40:27,440 --> 00:40:29,719
Speaker 4: It's just it's so funny because some of these kids,

874
00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:31,719
Speaker 4: you know, they come in and then I'm like, buckle up,

875
00:40:31,960 --> 00:40:34,320
Speaker 4: I go, don't don't disrespect Lisa. I always kind of

876
00:40:34,320 --> 00:40:36,759
Speaker 4: give like a little like you warm. I go, don't

877
00:40:36,800 --> 00:40:38,520
Speaker 4: be late, don't like if I ever like cover for

878
00:40:38,560 --> 00:40:40,719
Speaker 4: your class for if anything happens. I come in and

879
00:40:40,760 --> 00:40:43,000
Speaker 4: I'm like, just you guys know you know who's teaching

880
00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:46,040
Speaker 4: the class, right, they don't don't be a fucking I'm like,

881
00:40:46,360 --> 00:40:47,480
Speaker 4: this is what's so effed up.

882
00:40:47,400 --> 00:40:51,480
Speaker 3: About my class Because they're so young. They don't know

883
00:40:51,520 --> 00:40:55,040
Speaker 3: who I am, so I at one point was so annoyed.

884
00:40:55,080 --> 00:40:57,000
Speaker 3: I didn't end up doing this, but I'm like, I'm

885
00:40:57,000 --> 00:40:59,520
Speaker 3: going to tell them who I am. I'm going to say,

886
00:40:59,600 --> 00:41:02,680
Speaker 3: look at my credits and I am dB page. And

887
00:41:02,719 --> 00:41:04,720
Speaker 3: I was like, you don't have to do that, because

888
00:41:05,080 --> 00:41:06,880
Speaker 3: part of me is like, just respect me and the

889
00:41:06,960 --> 00:41:10,560
Speaker 3: lessons I'm trying to teach you. And if you accidentally

890
00:41:10,640 --> 00:41:13,160
Speaker 3: have a parent who's a fan, they'll tell you. But

891
00:41:13,200 --> 00:41:16,359
Speaker 3: it's weird because that need to like be known and

892
00:41:16,400 --> 00:41:18,480
Speaker 3: to be Why don't you know my credits? Do you

893
00:41:18,520 --> 00:41:20,240
Speaker 3: not know that I'm the only one at the school

894
00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:25,760
Speaker 3: who actually a television Sure, yeah, get the fucking braggy

895
00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:28,680
Speaker 3: and stupid no, but it's like, don't worry.

896
00:41:28,719 --> 00:41:31,440
Speaker 4: I do it for you. I'm like, hey, guys fucking around,

897
00:41:31,800 --> 00:41:35,200
Speaker 4: like just just trust me. You got Google right, all right? No,

898
00:41:35,320 --> 00:41:36,799
Speaker 4: your role? And they're like, oh my god.

899
00:41:37,200 --> 00:41:39,440
Speaker 3: I was talking my friend Anthony about this. He used

900
00:41:39,480 --> 00:41:43,000
Speaker 3: to study with Stella Adler acting, and he said I

901
00:41:43,040 --> 00:41:48,480
Speaker 3: think he said because he was like, how no, my buddy,

902
00:41:48,520 --> 00:41:51,839
Speaker 3: I go, how he was, how do they not know

903
00:41:51,880 --> 00:41:53,600
Speaker 3: who you are? And I go, I don't know, They're

904
00:41:53,640 --> 00:41:57,319
Speaker 3: just like a different generation. And he goes, it's true.

905
00:41:57,360 --> 00:41:59,120
Speaker 3: He goes, if I was in college and I had

906
00:41:59,239 --> 00:42:02,640
Speaker 3: Udah Hagen or Adler as a teacher, I would never

907
00:42:02,680 --> 00:42:04,960
Speaker 3: have looked them up. I'm so up my own ass

908
00:42:05,040 --> 00:42:08,239
Speaker 3: as an acting student. I mean, any kind of students

909
00:42:08,800 --> 00:42:11,919
Speaker 3: self absorbed enough. I'masurely an acting student. They're not looking

910
00:42:12,000 --> 00:42:14,200
Speaker 3: up their dumb teachers. They just think we're these old

911
00:42:14,239 --> 00:42:15,480
Speaker 3: cunts who have to teach.

912
00:42:15,800 --> 00:42:18,080
Speaker 4: But that's an ide you though. I think that's because

913
00:42:18,080 --> 00:42:20,120
Speaker 4: you're such a great teacher with them that you don't

914
00:42:20,160 --> 00:42:22,160
Speaker 4: have to lead with like look at my resume, like

915
00:42:22,200 --> 00:42:24,120
Speaker 4: that you connect with them. And I always tell them

916
00:42:24,680 --> 00:42:27,120
Speaker 4: she's such a good person to have on your side

917
00:42:27,440 --> 00:42:29,960
Speaker 4: going through this career, not just because of your past

918
00:42:30,000 --> 00:42:31,920
Speaker 4: and you who you know or whatever it is, but

919
00:42:32,040 --> 00:42:34,120
Speaker 4: like you really do reach out to the kids and

920
00:42:34,160 --> 00:42:37,120
Speaker 4: like y, once you've graduated, you like help them with

921
00:42:37,160 --> 00:42:40,000
Speaker 4: opportunities and we you know, we check in on our

922
00:42:40,040 --> 00:42:42,520
Speaker 4: students and and it's really cool to see. And I'm like,

923
00:42:43,200 --> 00:42:45,920
Speaker 4: don't mess it up for your own bullshit.

924
00:42:45,760 --> 00:42:48,840
Speaker 3: Said Chris. I think we can all agree, including Celia.

925
00:42:49,080 --> 00:42:51,640
Speaker 3: I'm a gift. If people don't know how to unwrap

926
00:42:51,680 --> 00:42:55,600
Speaker 3: that motherfucker. Then they'll motherfuckers stay. They got to go

927
00:42:56,480 --> 00:43:01,480
Speaker 3: see that. I do every class the love that I have.

928
00:43:01,680 --> 00:43:04,080
Speaker 3: Yelled at them once last year they got me really

929
00:43:04,080 --> 00:43:07,760
Speaker 3: mad about something. I go, you little ungrateful motherfuckers.

930
00:43:07,800 --> 00:43:08,359
Speaker 4: Oh you did.

931
00:43:08,520 --> 00:43:11,319
Speaker 3: Of course it's college, just not high school. And I'm

932
00:43:11,360 --> 00:43:14,160
Speaker 3: just like you ungrateful motherfucker. Because it was about them

933
00:43:14,280 --> 00:43:17,360
Speaker 3: not being nice to somebody else. I don't me. I

934
00:43:17,400 --> 00:43:19,600
Speaker 3: just yell at them. I go, shut up, what are

935
00:43:19,640 --> 00:43:23,000
Speaker 3: you stupid? But like you're disrespecting someone on stage and

936
00:43:23,040 --> 00:43:25,200
Speaker 3: these poor kids are standing there trying to do their

937
00:43:25,200 --> 00:43:28,240
Speaker 3: little five minutes and they've never done anything but dunce.

938
00:43:28,480 --> 00:43:29,000
Speaker 4: Yeah.

939
00:43:29,120 --> 00:43:30,960
Speaker 3: I have kids in my class this time who are

940
00:43:31,080 --> 00:43:35,279
Speaker 3: literal dancers who have never spoken on a stage, and

941
00:43:35,480 --> 00:43:38,799
Speaker 3: I at first was judging them. They're so good, isn't

942
00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:39,320
Speaker 3: it great?

943
00:43:39,960 --> 00:43:41,960
Speaker 4: This is the one thing that we really bond on.

944
00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:44,920
Speaker 4: It when we're at work. It's like, and I tell

945
00:43:44,960 --> 00:43:47,839
Speaker 4: that students, like, we're not bullshitting. We don't just show

946
00:43:47,920 --> 00:43:50,439
Speaker 4: up like we're talking about our classes all the time.

947
00:43:50,440 --> 00:43:52,480
Speaker 4: We was checking like so and so did this, so

948
00:43:52,520 --> 00:43:53,920
Speaker 4: and so did this. We had a great one of

949
00:43:53,920 --> 00:43:54,760
Speaker 4: our great students.

950
00:43:55,680 --> 00:44:00,000
Speaker 3: Your student Austin didn't open minded. It was so excited,

951
00:44:00,520 --> 00:44:01,239
Speaker 3: you need to do it.

952
00:44:01,280 --> 00:44:04,759
Speaker 4: But he's like, but like, we cheerlead these kids, you know,

953
00:44:04,960 --> 00:44:07,200
Speaker 4: to take these chances and you know.

954
00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:09,719
Speaker 3: You want's funny because cheerlead. I always say to them,

955
00:44:10,320 --> 00:44:13,360
Speaker 3: I'm not a cheerleader. I said, I'm not going to

956
00:44:13,440 --> 00:44:15,839
Speaker 3: tell you it's good if it sucks. So every laugh

957
00:44:15,880 --> 00:44:18,560
Speaker 3: you get is earned. And every time I said that's funny,

958
00:44:18,600 --> 00:44:21,759
Speaker 3: it's funny, I said, So don't think I'm ever bullshitting' you.

959
00:44:22,120 --> 00:44:24,279
Speaker 3: But like after they graduate, like I'm still in touch

960
00:44:24,320 --> 00:44:26,239
Speaker 3: with six of the girls, I'm just like, no, you know,

961
00:44:26,719 --> 00:44:29,840
Speaker 3: help them sort of navigate failures and not getting the

962
00:44:30,080 --> 00:44:34,160
Speaker 3: parts and the auditions and stuff like. That's we do

963
00:44:34,239 --> 00:44:36,600
Speaker 3: that because it's good for the soul. For us. We're

964
00:44:36,600 --> 00:44:39,200
Speaker 3: not getting anything out of that, you know. And I

965
00:44:39,320 --> 00:44:41,799
Speaker 3: meet with mine privately because as you know, I'm quite

966
00:44:41,840 --> 00:44:44,239
Speaker 3: wealthy and I have my own headstone in the wrong.

967
00:44:46,280 --> 00:44:50,320
Speaker 3: So well, I should tell these little motherfuckers, these fucking

968
00:44:50,400 --> 00:44:53,960
Speaker 3: ungrateful cocksuckers, they should be the ones putting the flowers.

969
00:44:54,280 --> 00:44:56,320
Speaker 3: I should put it in the contract for every coaching

970
00:44:56,360 --> 00:44:59,520
Speaker 3: hour I give you, you put flowers on that fucking great.

971
00:44:59,600 --> 00:45:00,000
Speaker 3: All right.

972
00:45:00,239 --> 00:45:03,080
Speaker 4: I think I started deleting social media apps because I'm like,

973
00:45:03,080 --> 00:45:05,279
Speaker 4: probably it's all bad news and it's all hit me

974
00:45:05,320 --> 00:45:07,200
Speaker 4: in the face, and this isn't helping. So I was like,

975
00:45:07,200 --> 00:45:09,560
Speaker 4: I'm trying to take the reins, and so I definitely

976
00:45:09,600 --> 00:45:10,440
Speaker 4: am on Instagram.

977
00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:13,040
Speaker 3: But okay, good find Jock because you do shows. You

978
00:45:13,080 --> 00:45:16,000
Speaker 3: teach a lot, which I admire, like different schools and

979
00:45:16,000 --> 00:45:17,479
Speaker 3: stuff that's been fun. Good.

980
00:45:17,600 --> 00:45:19,839
Speaker 4: You know what I've been doing. This is so this

981
00:45:19,920 --> 00:45:22,840
Speaker 4: is so embarrassing, but I love it, so fuck you.

982
00:45:23,080 --> 00:45:26,800
Speaker 4: Oh you know, my friends and I my comedy partner

983
00:45:26,800 --> 00:45:29,560
Speaker 4: Paul from the Christ and Paul Show. You know, Paul's

984
00:45:29,560 --> 00:45:32,759
Speaker 4: great and one of our best friends, Darren. We started

985
00:45:32,920 --> 00:45:34,319
Speaker 4: a thing where we're like, we're all on the same

986
00:45:35,080 --> 00:45:37,040
Speaker 4: rut right now. We're like, we love teaching, but like

987
00:45:37,400 --> 00:45:38,960
Speaker 4: we're at an age where we're like, I don't have

988
00:45:39,000 --> 00:45:41,040
Speaker 4: the energy to you know what I mean, making it

989
00:45:41,080 --> 00:45:46,240
Speaker 4: and all that bullshit. We have decided to stream sketch

990
00:45:46,280 --> 00:45:51,680
Speaker 4: comedy via video games. We will create twitch yeah, like

991
00:45:51,800 --> 00:45:55,160
Speaker 4: we're on like TikTok, and we go into a video

992
00:45:55,239 --> 00:45:58,120
Speaker 4: game and we will use the video game characters and

993
00:45:58,120 --> 00:45:59,439
Speaker 4: create sketch comedy.

994
00:45:59,120 --> 00:46:10,640
Speaker 6: Bits and it has been checking off every box in

995
00:46:10,680 --> 00:46:11,520
Speaker 6: my life right now.

996
00:46:11,680 --> 00:46:14,720
Speaker 4: It's so silly, but we love it. It's a creative outlet.

997
00:46:15,000 --> 00:46:17,319
Speaker 4: I get to talk to my friends and it's like

998
00:46:17,400 --> 00:46:19,080
Speaker 4: the release that I need. And that's one of those

999
00:46:19,080 --> 00:46:20,240
Speaker 4: things that I needed.

1000
00:46:20,280 --> 00:46:22,840
Speaker 3: I needed, Like, was it just did you have the

1001
00:46:22,920 --> 00:46:25,200
Speaker 3: idea and be like, nah, I don't want to do it?

1002
00:46:25,239 --> 00:46:27,200
Speaker 3: We want or did you just like did you put

1003
00:46:27,200 --> 00:46:28,600
Speaker 3: it off or somebody.

1004
00:46:28,360 --> 00:46:30,319
Speaker 4: To do something creative? We like, you know, we would

1005
00:46:30,320 --> 00:46:32,239
Speaker 4: play video games growing up and stuff, and you know

1006
00:46:32,280 --> 00:46:34,480
Speaker 4: we're fans of it and stuff, and we said, let's

1007
00:46:34,480 --> 00:46:37,520
Speaker 4: combine the two and see what happens. And it's just

1008
00:46:37,560 --> 00:46:38,359
Speaker 4: scratching all.

1009
00:46:38,280 --> 00:46:40,000
Speaker 3: The itches, same creativity.

1010
00:46:40,000 --> 00:46:42,000
Speaker 4: It's getting my I'm getting to like talk to my

1011
00:46:42,000 --> 00:46:42,840
Speaker 4: friends all night.

1012
00:46:43,600 --> 00:46:46,839
Speaker 3: And do you did you release the need to control it?

1013
00:46:47,000 --> 00:46:49,480
Speaker 3: Meaning care if anyone watched.

1014
00:46:50,280 --> 00:46:53,960
Speaker 4: That's always a balancing act, but yes, I have actually accepted,

1015
00:46:54,000 --> 00:46:56,439
Speaker 4: like you know what, it's making me feel good. It's

1016
00:46:56,480 --> 00:46:59,000
Speaker 4: making our my friends feel and who gives a shit

1017
00:46:59,080 --> 00:47:01,319
Speaker 4: if anything comes from not like we're gonna be big

1018
00:47:01,320 --> 00:47:04,360
Speaker 4: streaming fame, Like we don't care. We're doing something and

1019
00:47:04,400 --> 00:47:06,160
Speaker 4: it's actually like people are starting to like it and

1020
00:47:06,160 --> 00:47:07,200
Speaker 4: it's like, how great.

1021
00:47:07,719 --> 00:47:10,520
Speaker 3: See it's see I think when you do it for

1022
00:47:10,560 --> 00:47:13,719
Speaker 3: the right reasons, yes, even if it's five people, the

1023
00:47:13,800 --> 00:47:16,160
Speaker 3: right people listen or see it or whatever. But it's

1024
00:47:16,200 --> 00:47:18,839
Speaker 3: the big word for me lately has been released. Yeah,

1025
00:47:18,840 --> 00:47:21,160
Speaker 3: because I read this great thing in the Fall about

1026
00:47:21,560 --> 00:47:24,719
Speaker 3: actually it's right read at the end of August. It

1027
00:47:24,800 --> 00:47:29,080
Speaker 3: was about the season changing, and it's said, if a

1028
00:47:29,160 --> 00:47:33,640
Speaker 3: tree holds on to a leaf, it will the tree

1029
00:47:33,680 --> 00:47:37,000
Speaker 3: like literally will die. It stagnates and dies. So if

1030
00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:40,920
Speaker 3: we hold on to these old beliefs of judging ourselves

1031
00:47:40,960 --> 00:47:44,319
Speaker 3: by numbers and numbers of downloads and numbers of your

1032
00:47:44,360 --> 00:47:47,680
Speaker 3: ticket sales or whatever, we're going to stagnate because all

1033
00:47:47,680 --> 00:47:49,120
Speaker 3: we're worried about is that thing.

1034
00:47:49,160 --> 00:47:51,879
Speaker 4: Self worth is like it crumbles because everything is.

1035
00:47:52,320 --> 00:47:54,160
Speaker 3: For something you can never and also you can never

1036
00:47:54,200 --> 00:47:57,000
Speaker 3: get enough self worth. It will have to be bigger

1037
00:47:57,000 --> 00:47:59,919
Speaker 3: and bigger and bigger. So it's really releasing the need

1038
00:48:00,560 --> 00:48:03,320
Speaker 3: to hold on to those old ways of judging ourselves.

1039
00:48:03,560 --> 00:48:03,799
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1040
00:48:04,440 --> 00:48:08,680
Speaker 3: So, speaking of judging ourselves, we judge our listeners by

1041
00:48:08,760 --> 00:48:12,280
Speaker 3: the stupid shit they send to us. Send your stupid

1042
00:48:12,320 --> 00:48:16,000
Speaker 3: shit problem to shrink this show at gmail dot com.

1043
00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:17,840
Speaker 3: Do you have a couple letters for us? Chrish?

1044
00:48:17,960 --> 00:48:21,479
Speaker 4: Sure do come Dear Lisa, I'm forty two years old

1045
00:48:21,520 --> 00:48:24,439
Speaker 4: and single, and ever since college, my friends have told

1046
00:48:24,480 --> 00:48:26,960
Speaker 4: me to go to therapy. I did go once and

1047
00:48:27,040 --> 00:48:30,360
Speaker 4: felt like it was a waste of time. Don't I

1048
00:48:30,360 --> 00:48:32,920
Speaker 4: don't get how talking about something can change it. And

1049
00:48:32,960 --> 00:48:38,120
Speaker 4: I'm already aware of my abandonment issues and my dad

1050
00:48:38,160 --> 00:48:40,279
Speaker 4: died at an early age. I do still hope to

1051
00:48:40,320 --> 00:48:43,120
Speaker 4: meet someone, but I don't believe going to therapy will

1052
00:48:43,680 --> 00:48:46,160
Speaker 4: make that, will have make that happen over.

1053
00:48:46,360 --> 00:48:49,359
Speaker 3: Oh boy, he can't even really write. You know what

1054
00:48:49,440 --> 00:48:53,279
Speaker 3: he needs to do go to class and learn how

1055
00:48:53,280 --> 00:48:56,160
Speaker 3: to write a letter and then go to therapy. I

1056
00:48:56,200 --> 00:48:57,879
Speaker 3: think he's attacking things in the wrong order.

1057
00:48:58,320 --> 00:49:00,640
Speaker 4: Do you agree with my friends and I should give

1058
00:49:00,680 --> 00:49:05,080
Speaker 4: therapy another shot? Thanks eleanor oh Ellen, it's a chick.

1059
00:49:05,239 --> 00:49:06,879
Speaker 3: Oh my god. I honestly thought that was a guy,

1060
00:49:06,880 --> 00:49:09,959
Speaker 3: because it's such a guy thing to like be told

1061
00:49:10,000 --> 00:49:11,920
Speaker 3: they need help and not go or go once and

1062
00:49:11,920 --> 00:49:15,200
Speaker 3: go FOCU. Yeah, so this is a woman. Where's she from?

1063
00:49:15,280 --> 00:49:18,520
Speaker 3: This little Madisons lesbian from Madison?

1064
00:49:19,040 --> 00:49:21,879
Speaker 4: Are you No, No, she went to school there.

1065
00:49:21,960 --> 00:49:27,520
Speaker 3: Okay, so she is a lesbian. No here. I feel

1066
00:49:27,520 --> 00:49:33,560
Speaker 3: like sometime if more than one person you trust is

1067
00:49:33,600 --> 00:49:36,440
Speaker 3: telling you to do something, you might want to open

1068
00:49:36,440 --> 00:49:39,839
Speaker 3: your mind to it. Because clearly she has a lot

1069
00:49:39,920 --> 00:49:42,520
Speaker 3: of friends selling her, and they've probably had a lot

1070
00:49:42,560 --> 00:49:47,080
Speaker 3: of convos about old Lezie Eleanor and said this Leie

1071
00:49:47,200 --> 00:49:50,839
Speaker 3: from Madison needs to get some help. So I don't know,

1072
00:49:50,920 --> 00:49:54,520
Speaker 3: it's almost like, why fight it. It's not saying believe

1073
00:49:54,600 --> 00:49:56,839
Speaker 3: everything people tell you, But if those who truly care

1074
00:49:56,880 --> 00:49:59,640
Speaker 3: about you are saying nudge, nudge, maybe it's time to.

1075
00:49:59,560 --> 00:50:01,800
Speaker 4: Look at it. I think just being open to the idea.

1076
00:50:01,880 --> 00:50:03,680
Speaker 4: I think the more open you are, it's like if

1077
00:50:03,719 --> 00:50:05,239
Speaker 4: it doesn't work, it doesn't work, but you're never going

1078
00:50:05,320 --> 00:50:06,759
Speaker 4: to know unless you kind of just go, you know what,

1079
00:50:06,840 --> 00:50:09,359
Speaker 4: let me just like give into the process and just see.

1080
00:50:09,480 --> 00:50:11,440
Speaker 3: Right, one session is never going to help you to

1081
00:50:11,520 --> 00:50:14,080
Speaker 3: I went once and it didn't help. Well yeah, but

1082
00:50:14,120 --> 00:50:16,239
Speaker 3: then there's also throw in the fact of and my

1083
00:50:16,320 --> 00:50:18,000
Speaker 3: dad left when I was this age, and I have

1084
00:50:18,040 --> 00:50:21,880
Speaker 3: abandonming issues. Well, just because you know you have abandoned

1085
00:50:21,920 --> 00:50:25,040
Speaker 3: mission issues. This is what people forget if you know

1086
00:50:25,120 --> 00:50:29,759
Speaker 3: you have rage issues, abandonment issues, ADHD, whatever it is. Yeah,

1087
00:50:29,920 --> 00:50:32,880
Speaker 3: that's up here, that's in your head. That, yes, you

1088
00:50:33,000 --> 00:50:36,359
Speaker 3: know that. Then it's unearthing it in your body. It's

1089
00:50:36,400 --> 00:50:39,040
Speaker 3: figuring out where it takes hold. Like I recently, we're

1090
00:50:39,040 --> 00:50:40,919
Speaker 3: going to do an episode on it. I recently. I've

1091
00:50:40,960 --> 00:50:43,279
Speaker 3: always known for a long time I can't take a joke.

1092
00:50:43,680 --> 00:50:47,400
Speaker 3: I can't be made fun of. I finally figured out why.

1093
00:50:48,280 --> 00:50:50,200
Speaker 3: So it would be easy for me to be like, yeah,

1094
00:50:50,440 --> 00:50:53,160
Speaker 3: my shrink knows I can't take a joke, and but

1095
00:50:53,280 --> 00:50:55,560
Speaker 3: I'm still having in my body. I want to get

1096
00:50:55,680 --> 00:50:57,680
Speaker 3: rid of that thing and be the person who isn't

1097
00:50:57,719 --> 00:51:00,800
Speaker 3: so serious and can take a joke. So I gotta

1098
00:51:00,880 --> 00:51:02,920
Speaker 3: really work on it. So just because she knows she

1099
00:51:02,960 --> 00:51:06,160
Speaker 3: has abandonment doesn't mean the knowledge is enough. It's a

1100
00:51:06,160 --> 00:51:10,359
Speaker 3: place to start. Ban eleanor bitch, get it together. Don't

1101
00:51:10,400 --> 00:51:11,520
Speaker 3: be like Celia.

1102
00:51:11,760 --> 00:51:14,440
Speaker 4: Next letter, Yeah, next letter we got dearly said I

1103
00:51:14,480 --> 00:51:17,720
Speaker 4: recently got divorced from my wife after a ten year marriage.

1104
00:51:17,800 --> 00:51:18,040
Speaker 3: Good.

1105
00:51:18,200 --> 00:51:20,239
Speaker 4: We have two young kids, and my sister thinks I

1106
00:51:20,239 --> 00:51:22,719
Speaker 4: should talk to someone. I don't think that just because

1107
00:51:22,719 --> 00:51:24,760
Speaker 4: I got divorce means that I all of a sudden

1108
00:51:24,960 --> 00:51:27,759
Speaker 4: need a therapist. I've handled my problems on my own

1109
00:51:27,880 --> 00:51:30,440
Speaker 4: my whole life. Why should I start with therapy now?

1110
00:51:30,600 --> 00:51:33,280
Speaker 4: Thanks Mark from colts Neck, New Jersey.

1111
00:51:33,440 --> 00:51:36,560
Speaker 3: Okay, that's not a place cold. I feel he's a liar.

1112
00:51:37,000 --> 00:51:39,279
Speaker 3: I feel you're a dirty liar, and your sister knows

1113
00:51:39,320 --> 00:51:42,680
Speaker 3: it because no one lives in colts Neck. That is

1114
00:51:42,719 --> 00:51:45,279
Speaker 3: from Twin Peaks. That is some Twin Peaks. It No,

1115
00:51:45,520 --> 00:51:48,840
Speaker 3: it's a place. So here's what I say to a

1116
00:51:48,880 --> 00:51:51,719
Speaker 3: guy like that. It's a little defensive. I get it.

1117
00:51:51,760 --> 00:51:54,680
Speaker 3: He's probably had the wife, she probably cheated with him

1118
00:51:54,920 --> 00:51:57,640
Speaker 3: with a black man. She probably had lots of sex

1119
00:51:57,680 --> 00:52:00,640
Speaker 3: in their bed, and the two kids want which is

1120
00:52:00,640 --> 00:52:04,360
Speaker 3: pretty damaging to the children. So I say his sister

1121
00:52:04,560 --> 00:52:08,480
Speaker 3: might be noticing something. First of all, Also, she might

1122
00:52:08,480 --> 00:52:10,799
Speaker 3: be projecting, Hey, I got a divorce and I needed

1123
00:52:10,800 --> 00:52:14,440
Speaker 3: to talk to But here's the three words. What's his name?

1124
00:52:14,680 --> 00:52:15,920
Speaker 4: What's colts asshole?

1125
00:52:16,080 --> 00:52:16,360
Speaker 2: Mark?

1126
00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:17,120
Speaker 4: Mark?

1127
00:52:17,800 --> 00:52:24,200
Speaker 3: Three words? It can't hurt at the very least, you'll find. Well,

1128
00:52:24,280 --> 00:52:27,800
Speaker 3: I'm pretty well adjusted. I got through this divorce. Well,

1129
00:52:28,360 --> 00:52:30,600
Speaker 3: I don't hate black men just because my wife banged

1130
00:52:30,600 --> 00:52:34,319
Speaker 3: like four I'm going to just let this go. But

1131
00:52:34,880 --> 00:52:37,600
Speaker 3: maybe you will on earth some stuff. Maybe you will

1132
00:52:37,600 --> 00:52:40,200
Speaker 3: have anger that you shoved down and that the beach

1133
00:52:40,280 --> 00:52:43,160
Speaker 3: ball will not pop up at inappropriate times, unlike the

1134
00:52:43,200 --> 00:52:46,160
Speaker 3: balls on the black guy when they were banging your wife.

1135
00:52:46,640 --> 00:52:49,959
Speaker 3: So Mark, if that is your colt's neck ass dumb

1136
00:52:50,040 --> 00:52:53,279
Speaker 3: ass name for real, give it a try.

1137
00:52:53,360 --> 00:52:55,080
Speaker 4: And you also have kids. Do it for the kids.

1138
00:52:55,120 --> 00:52:57,279
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, that's the thing too, because I was going

1139
00:52:57,360 --> 00:53:00,319
Speaker 3: to give you this huge compliment before, Chris, and it

1140
00:53:00,400 --> 00:53:02,360
Speaker 3: just flew out of my mind because I'm not going

1141
00:53:04,000 --> 00:53:09,160
Speaker 3: You are literally breaking generational trauma by going to therapy.

1142
00:53:09,480 --> 00:53:13,040
Speaker 3: You are because you mentioned giving your daughter tools and

1143
00:53:13,080 --> 00:53:15,680
Speaker 3: things like helping her see it the way you're learning.

1144
00:53:16,560 --> 00:53:19,880
Speaker 3: That's literally ensuring she's not going to go through the

1145
00:53:19,880 --> 00:53:22,640
Speaker 3: same thing. She'll go through other stuff that we all do,

1146
00:53:23,280 --> 00:53:26,160
Speaker 3: but her kids won't go through the same thing, and

1147
00:53:26,280 --> 00:53:30,480
Speaker 3: on and on. So your parents' problems and flaws won't

1148
00:53:30,520 --> 00:53:32,160
Speaker 3: be as prevalent in them.

1149
00:53:32,440 --> 00:53:34,680
Speaker 4: And it's amazing to see what my parents had. I

1150
00:53:34,719 --> 00:53:37,920
Speaker 4: had a great childhood and to see what they went through,

1151
00:53:38,640 --> 00:53:41,600
Speaker 4: you know, and how they stopped it with us, my

1152
00:53:41,680 --> 00:53:44,840
Speaker 4: brother and I and now passing that along like stopping

1153
00:53:44,840 --> 00:53:46,840
Speaker 4: it here, like we're not going to drag this into

1154
00:53:46,840 --> 00:53:49,200
Speaker 4: my kids, and how they did the same thing. So

1155
00:53:49,200 --> 00:53:51,720
Speaker 4: it was definitely learning from that, going like, wow, thanks

1156
00:53:51,719 --> 00:53:54,640
Speaker 4: for not giving me that childhood that you had to endure.

1157
00:53:54,760 --> 00:54:00,600
Speaker 3: Sometimes yes, and so this mark, this guy, the wife

1158
00:54:01,000 --> 00:54:04,680
Speaker 3: with the black boyfriend. You gotta say to yourself, it's

1159
00:54:04,719 --> 00:54:07,440
Speaker 3: for the kids, and sometimes she just do it for kids. Yeah,

1160
00:54:07,480 --> 00:54:10,399
Speaker 3: you know, that's it. Do me a favor. I want

1161
00:54:10,440 --> 00:54:13,279
Speaker 3: one more letter, but I've been told the last one

1162
00:54:13,320 --> 00:54:15,560
Speaker 3: is really good, so go to the end. We have

1163
00:54:15,680 --> 00:54:19,880
Speaker 3: many therapeutic letters. So it's Dear Lisa. I think it starts.

1164
00:54:20,239 --> 00:54:23,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I think that's started it. I'm twenty two

1165
00:54:23,239 --> 00:54:26,600
Speaker 4: years old and recently graduated college. My anxiety about the

1166
00:54:26,640 --> 00:54:28,960
Speaker 4: future keeps me up at night, and I definitely want

1167
00:54:28,960 --> 00:54:31,560
Speaker 4: to talk to somebody. The problem is who. Some of

1168
00:54:31,560 --> 00:54:35,520
Speaker 4: my friends say cognitive behavioral is the best, while others

1169
00:54:35,600 --> 00:54:38,480
Speaker 4: say trauma therapy. Which type of therapy do you recommend?

1170
00:54:38,880 --> 00:54:41,040
Speaker 4: Thanks Harper, New York, New York.

1171
00:54:41,040 --> 00:54:47,799
Speaker 3: Oh Harper's name, Holy shit, I gotta stop, I gotta

1172
00:54:47,800 --> 00:54:50,880
Speaker 3: pay more attention. Well, here's the thing I feel about Harper,

1173
00:54:51,160 --> 00:54:54,920
Speaker 3: how nice and self aware at that young age that

1174
00:54:55,000 --> 00:54:57,640
Speaker 3: she wants to help herself. And that is a very

1175
00:54:58,000 --> 00:55:01,160
Speaker 3: good question. There's so many types of therapy out there.

1176
00:55:01,600 --> 00:55:06,200
Speaker 3: I say, just start as they say, as Mark's wife

1177
00:55:06,200 --> 00:55:09,880
Speaker 3: said to that black man, just the tip. You stick

1178
00:55:10,000 --> 00:55:13,600
Speaker 3: the tip in first. I think trauma therapy honestly is

1179
00:55:13,640 --> 00:55:17,880
Speaker 3: the best therapy. It's somatic work, full body, it on earths.

1180
00:55:17,880 --> 00:55:19,840
Speaker 3: Even if you don't have big T trauma. It helps

1181
00:55:19,840 --> 00:55:22,320
Speaker 3: with small T trauma and you just get work it

1182
00:55:22,360 --> 00:55:26,120
Speaker 3: out of yourself for good. But it's a rough place

1183
00:55:26,160 --> 00:55:31,640
Speaker 3: to start. If talking just feels less threatening, just the tip,

1184
00:55:31,719 --> 00:55:35,640
Speaker 3: Please just talk. Find someone. Then maybe they refer to

1185
00:55:35,760 --> 00:55:37,279
Speaker 3: somebody to get it out of your body and do

1186
00:55:37,360 --> 00:55:41,600
Speaker 3: more somatic things. Whatever feels right to you as you

1187
00:55:41,640 --> 00:55:44,840
Speaker 3: interview these therapists. Because ps, every shrink or type of

1188
00:55:44,880 --> 00:55:48,760
Speaker 3: therapy isn't right for everybody. Like you're gonna experiment with things.

1189
00:55:48,960 --> 00:55:51,120
Speaker 3: I had a guy telling them me to do this

1190
00:55:51,320 --> 00:55:53,720
Speaker 3: fucking thing. I want to push him out a window.

1191
00:55:54,400 --> 00:55:56,920
Speaker 3: This tapping. Do you know what tapping is?

1192
00:55:57,280 --> 00:55:59,960
Speaker 4: I don't like to fly, and I had a therapy

1193
00:56:00,000 --> 00:56:01,960
Speaker 4: pissy issue. I was sitting next to your it's a

1194
00:56:01,960 --> 00:56:05,240
Speaker 4: tapping thing. Now, shitty turbulence. I'm like, ah, fuck tapping therapy.

1195
00:56:05,280 --> 00:56:05,960
Speaker 4: I don't want to hear it.

1196
00:56:06,160 --> 00:56:08,520
Speaker 3: So in other words, tapping therapy works for a lot

1197
00:56:08,560 --> 00:56:11,200
Speaker 3: of people. I think amdr and things like that. They

1198
00:56:11,239 --> 00:56:13,120
Speaker 3: work for a lot of people. They just I don't

1199
00:56:13,200 --> 00:56:15,400
Speaker 3: like them right now. It's not saying I won't like

1200
00:56:15,440 --> 00:56:18,319
Speaker 3: it in the future. But I remember this guy, so

1201
00:56:18,400 --> 00:56:22,600
Speaker 3: he does thankfully a lot of different modalities. So I

1202
00:56:22,760 --> 00:56:25,680
Speaker 3: like do an ifs, which is called internal family systems.

1203
00:56:25,920 --> 00:56:27,800
Speaker 3: It's where you find out the different parts of yourself

1204
00:56:27,840 --> 00:56:29,799
Speaker 3: and who's running the show and help the right one

1205
00:56:29,880 --> 00:56:33,759
Speaker 3: drive the bus in any circumstance. Okay, so he forgets

1206
00:56:33,800 --> 00:56:36,799
Speaker 3: that I don't like this tapping. When dy goes so

1207
00:56:37,040 --> 00:56:41,560
Speaker 3: uh you're ready to tap, I go put it in

1208
00:56:41,640 --> 00:56:44,719
Speaker 3: the notes. Brad, for once and for all. Don't tell

1209
00:56:44,760 --> 00:56:47,080
Speaker 3: me to fucking tap again. I don't go for that,

1210
00:56:47,640 --> 00:56:51,080
Speaker 3: so just because, But yet for fucking dumb Nick who's

1211
00:56:51,120 --> 00:56:53,880
Speaker 3: my side kick, care he likes it. Some of these

1212
00:56:53,920 --> 00:56:56,440
Speaker 3: people don't mind it. So I say, with this person,

1213
00:56:56,640 --> 00:56:58,520
Speaker 3: I'm proud of you for a twenty two year old

1214
00:56:58,600 --> 00:57:01,200
Speaker 3: knowing you need some help. You shouldn't be kept up

1215
00:57:01,239 --> 00:57:05,000
Speaker 3: at night worrying about the future, because honestly, worry is

1216
00:57:05,320 --> 00:57:08,400
Speaker 3: just suffering. It's about and you always worry about stuff

1217
00:57:08,400 --> 00:57:11,440
Speaker 3: that kind of ninety percent of the time doesn't even happen. Yeah,

1218
00:57:11,560 --> 00:57:13,680
Speaker 3: so I'm proud of this person for doing what's her.

1219
00:57:13,640 --> 00:57:17,680
Speaker 4: Name, Harpe is hard or she's down she's downstairs.

1220
00:57:17,760 --> 00:57:20,880
Speaker 3: It's Sillia's roommate who also hates her. But I don't

1221
00:57:20,880 --> 00:57:24,920
Speaker 3: blame them. What you do, Harper is you interview a

1222
00:57:24,920 --> 00:57:28,400
Speaker 3: few of these people. You see what feels right to you,

1223
00:57:28,560 --> 00:57:31,720
Speaker 3: where you're not sort of like, oh I should like this,

1224
00:57:32,160 --> 00:57:34,720
Speaker 3: it doesn't matter. What works works, and then you move

1225
00:57:34,760 --> 00:57:35,479
Speaker 3: on to the next.

1226
00:57:35,560 --> 00:57:37,600
Speaker 4: I have high hopes for Harper to that. She's so

1227
00:57:37,720 --> 00:57:40,080
Speaker 4: self aware and she's like, I should talk to somebody. Yeah,

1228
00:57:40,080 --> 00:57:42,880
Speaker 4: I think that's great herself and getting out of college

1229
00:57:42,880 --> 00:57:44,520
Speaker 4: and starting like the adult life.

1230
00:57:44,520 --> 00:57:46,840
Speaker 3: Now, I agree. The first streak I went to, I

1231
00:57:46,880 --> 00:57:51,120
Speaker 3: think was twenty five. I was twenty five. So the

1232
00:57:51,160 --> 00:57:54,200
Speaker 3: only thing I've ever really been interested in truly is myself.

1233
00:57:54,440 --> 00:57:56,240
Speaker 3: Like I'm super self abdorbed, but I want to know

1234
00:57:56,240 --> 00:57:58,960
Speaker 3: why I act like a mental patient. That's a really

1235
00:57:59,040 --> 00:58:01,680
Speaker 3: good study of yourself to start at twenty two of like,

1236
00:58:01,680 --> 00:58:04,160
Speaker 3: oh why do I rage at this thing? Why am

1237
00:58:04,240 --> 00:58:07,480
Speaker 3: I angry all the time? Why do I have anxiety? Wow? Dude,

1238
00:58:07,480 --> 00:58:10,600
Speaker 3: what a better world we'd be if everyone did that. Sure,

1239
00:58:10,840 --> 00:58:12,480
Speaker 3: so Harper wins, go for it.

1240
00:58:12,920 --> 00:58:13,800
Speaker 4: Good job, Harper.

1241
00:58:13,960 --> 00:58:16,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, she probably isn't listening Mark because she killed herself.

1242
00:58:16,960 --> 00:58:20,400
Speaker 3: But do you know what, sometimes you have to do that.

1243
00:58:20,920 --> 00:58:23,840
Speaker 3: Just kidding. Don't kill yourself the day. By the way,

1244
00:58:23,880 --> 00:58:27,760
Speaker 3: if you are considering suicide, just don't do it. Just

1245
00:58:27,800 --> 00:58:30,240
Speaker 3: compare your life to Celia's and then you'll go that

1246
00:58:30,280 --> 00:58:33,600
Speaker 3: fucking cunts still breathing? Could you breathe into the mic policia?

1247
00:58:33,800 --> 00:58:37,000
Speaker 3: She is still alive, so unhappy right now, she's doing

1248
00:58:37,000 --> 00:58:39,840
Speaker 3: that turn red thing worre to indicate that she's actually

1249
00:58:39,880 --> 00:58:43,800
Speaker 3: mad at me? Are you mad? See she's so weird,

1250
00:58:43,960 --> 00:58:44,320
Speaker 3: isn't she?

1251
00:58:44,720 --> 00:58:45,240
Speaker 4: I love her?

1252
00:58:45,280 --> 00:58:47,080
Speaker 3: I do, do I do? I will say she is

1253
00:58:47,120 --> 00:58:49,640
Speaker 3: a little bright spot in the day, a little a

1254
00:58:49,640 --> 00:58:50,200
Speaker 3: little one.

1255
00:58:50,760 --> 00:58:51,560
Speaker 4: I don't see the anger.

1256
00:58:52,640 --> 00:58:54,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, I know you'll see it later when she gets

1257
00:58:54,800 --> 00:58:58,040
Speaker 3: all fucking fired up about something with me. So anyway,

1258
00:58:58,640 --> 00:59:03,240
Speaker 3: thank you for listening. Chris O'Neil, I love you. Where

1259
00:59:03,240 --> 00:59:05,400
Speaker 3: do you find this video game shit you're doing?

1260
00:59:05,800 --> 00:59:11,000
Speaker 4: Oh? Craptastic gaming. Seriously, that's the thing, graptastic dot gaming.

1261
00:59:11,080 --> 00:59:13,560
Speaker 4: It's on TikTok. We're posting every day and it's just

1262
00:59:13,600 --> 00:59:15,120
Speaker 4: fun and it's wait.

1263
00:59:15,400 --> 00:59:17,480
Speaker 3: Are you serious, it's called crap tastic.

1264
00:59:17,600 --> 00:59:19,680
Speaker 4: This is why I like your podcast. It came from

1265
00:59:19,720 --> 00:59:22,680
Speaker 4: a podcast over a decade ago we did together just

1266
00:59:22,680 --> 00:59:24,400
Speaker 4: to like release and hang out and have fun. And

1267
00:59:24,400 --> 00:59:25,520
Speaker 4: we're doing this now. All right.

1268
00:59:25,520 --> 00:59:27,880
Speaker 3: They'll find you there, you'll find me. I don't care

1269
00:59:27,880 --> 00:59:30,360
Speaker 3: if you find me. I don't look at numbers. I

1270
00:59:30,360 --> 00:59:33,919
Speaker 3: don't look at this as an achievement. Lisa Lampinoni, that's

1271
00:59:33,960 --> 00:59:36,560
Speaker 3: my name. Find a bitch if you need to. If not,

1272
00:59:36,680 --> 00:59:41,280
Speaker 3: you own appreciative motherfuckers. Fuck you. Yeah, that's right. I'm

1273
00:59:41,280 --> 00:59:44,880
Speaker 3: talking to you students. Anyway, this has been shrink This.

1274
00:59:44,920 --> 00:59:47,600
Speaker 3: I'm gonna try to do the outro as naturally as

1275
00:59:47,680 --> 00:59:52,480
Speaker 3: Nick does. Thanks for listening. That sounds so fake. That's

1276
00:59:52,520 --> 00:59:55,760
Speaker 3: honestly not that thankful, but you're gonna lean into gratitude.

1277
00:59:56,200 --> 00:59:59,120
Speaker 3: Thanks for listening. Make sure to listen to shrink This.

1278
00:59:59,760 --> 01:00:04,200
Speaker 3: I your iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

1279
01:00:04,240 --> 01:00:06,040
Speaker 3: Peace out, Sun